#bro its never gonna be about talent ever again huh what the fuck

[princemick]

a billion euros for a fucking racing team

[chyuans]

          hello , hello  !   first of all ,  i’m super excited to be here even if i’m like 10 hrs LATE  ( gmt timezone things )  i’m noe ,  a gay  they / them at the age of 19 ,  and this privileged lil disappointment of a jock boy is gonna be filling the position of kong_01 . despite the rumours ?  yuanjun’s actually not nearly as bad as some of the people he’ll be meeting here >:)  but you’ll get to know more about that below  !  if you’d like to plot just light up that HEART , or add me on disc*rd which i’ll give out in im’s , where i’m infinitely faster .  if i’m not gaming .  no tw’s under the cut  .

* backstory. > many people know of yuanjun, but few people truly know him. he's the famous kong families’ son, heir to the kong legacy, now forward position for south korea men’s national hockey team - which brought forth a ton of international fame from back home and amongst hockey lovers worldwide. while his talent is undeniable, he is long overshadowed by his families’ accomplishments, forever reminded that he’d never be the perfect son they’d hoped for, and no one ever lets him forget it.

> being the child of business tycoons who’s art business seemed to never be on the decline, tended to lend itself to an unconventional, pretty lonely childhood. 

> although jun no longer wants to dabble in the stupid shit he probably did as a teen, and escape from their home in a childish fit of rage and make the lives of the various nannies that tended to him while his parents were off being great hell, he still wonders sometimes whether this profession is what he would’ve wanted if he’d just not wanted to spite his parents. he loves hockey - that fact is undeniable. he thanks the nanny who took him there once out of necessity to stop his whining, and he fell in love with it almost instantly. but he also questions whether he gravitated to it because it was something he could throw himself into wholeheartedly to fill a void.

> he's very open to different types of people, and after being scouted at 19 and having a massive shift both in culture and identity as he then begun to travel worldwide, he’s a tiny bit more wordly now than he was back then. he's much more concerned about who you are underneath than superficial appearances, which means developing relationships are few and far between, because a lot of people do approach him because of his fame/fortune. he's unjudgemental to the point where his friends worry about his naivety and how easily he trusts people, but he's absolutely not dumb, just very well versed on telling good people from the bad.

> jun may even come across as naïve, but he's very aware of that perception is nearly important as reality. he's not extroverted in a way that demands conversation, but he knows how to talk to anyone from any background even if its just to maintain pleasantries. after competing in various competitions and versing players from canada to japan, he's become much more sharp and ambitious, a guy who very rarely lets distractions take their course. perhaps it’s with this that his family loathe his choices all the more, with his appetite, he was born with the skills required to run a business - pity he never took to anything of the creative sort.  

> working in a fast, stressful, highly coveted job such as pro-sports is a full time job and then some; jun doesn't spend much time not working on it. outside of his schedule, he likes bettering his stamina at the gym and eating healthy. he likes being surrounded by authentic people or nobody at all. he’s not one for trying new things and having new experiences due to time management, tending to stick to a schedule.

> he gets a lot of bad press though, which is beginning to weigh a little heavy on him. doubly now the murder has people talking. from being accused of performance-enhancing pills, various personality scandals, to being linked with ‘dating’ (see: ruining the image of) idols and chaebol’s alike. right now, he’s currently battling a lot of unwanted publicity because of a misunderstood interaction online against a wealthy sweetheart that went sour. 

> while jun might be generally unsympathetic and analytical when it comes to developing relationships with people that’ll last long-term, he's a bleeding heart when it comes to kids who may have experienced the same lonely upbringing as he did, without the financial gains. right now he spends sunday’s teaching a bunch of local foster home kids how to skate, and is trying to fund a couple of sports scholarships for those who show promise under a fake name, just generally being a good ‘ole guy.

> his family do not approve of his job, ofc. in fact neither of his parents have ever attended any of his matches to this day, and are only on semi-decent terms with him because jun begrudgingly is still tied by name to the business and shows his face at events for all of 30 minutes until he physically can no longer maintain pleasantries. his celebrity image perhaps is one thing they can manipulate, and even then, jun could get into scandals galore and still be doing his job. good press, bad press, it has the kong’s family name at the forefront of peoples’ minds, which always brings forth revenue.  

> pros: could be a lot worse considering his upbringing, collected, and level-headed most of the time. wicked good at sports, and keeps a cool head in a tough situation. ambitious, curious, a little reckless. eager to prove himself, rich? and very endeared to people/places he finds fascinating. which are many. knows where the good, authentic chinese cuisine is. hardworking and very interested in the idea of Progress.

> cons: the most private person alive, will not divulge any palatable information about himself or his feelings. devil's advocate always. will put himself and others at an arm’s length the second he feels (disgusted noises) e-emotions (love, namely). gets bored easily. paranoid, leads with the head more than the heart. friends > > > family. a little self-involved, never fucking sleeps - will be that neighbour you can hear padding around above your apartment at 3.05 am like it’s mid-day, aaaaand Loves Winning Above All Else

* personality & relationships.

> like many others, jun has his fair share of surface-level friends. he’s quick to be interested in people, to get to know them better, but it's difficult for him to get closer than that after a childhood of being picked up and dropped by those who looked over him - which kinda has left him with abandonment issues.

> he’s a curator of neat things that aren’t too overtly complex, and that includes friendships. so if you have something unusual about you, whether it's a talent or a way of thinking, he would be inclined to get to know you better. also, he has a lot of leverage with his job. being friends with a sports star slash million dollar trust fund baby who can get you free shit never hurts, just don’t befriend him for the perks, yanno?

> jun is very dedicated to his vision of things, and can sometimes be very obstinate in the way he a) wants them to be done b) doesn't accept other options, think steve jobs. he's very mercurial and can be nice one minute but isn't afraid to switch to hardass boss to get things done and did.  > he is insanely competitive and his strive is drawn out by always wanting to be on top. truly first child material. that's the kind of guy he is, with standards that do not reflect his passive side too well, which sometimes can get him into some “personality” scandals. he is driven, motivated, always looking for ways to be winning.

> i'm sure someone is bound to hate him, he’s probably got a few accounts online dedicated to a steady stream of shit-talking, given his cutthroat status or holding many hockey cups.

> jun doesn’t think too much about his sexuality - he'd probably best be labelled as pan, but leans towards those who identify as women? because of his current placement in a workspace, and with a cultural identity, that both don’t often lend themselves to lgbtq+ rights, i doubt he’d ever make that public.

> he works amongst some of the fittest people in the world, he knows how to appreciate beautiful bodies, but he's not about to discriminate. he's tragically a committaphobe and isn't interested in anything long-term right now, although i think it'd be funny if someone tried. he's very open for flings and one-night stands and even a friends with benefits sort of set up. 

* wc’s.  >  bring me his baby bro and sis. i command u. i have many thoughts  >  somebody who maybe gets in on his foster-kid situation? idk maybe they have a perception of jun being what he is in the articles they read of him, but they see him and are like <3_<3 he actually real Nice huh. i see this being romantic but it could bloom a really nice, wholesome friendship too. >  enemies. not gonna lie, he doesn’t vibe with rich kids w / a stick up their ass, especially since a lot of the people he works with aren’t from exorbitant families. people who loathe him for declining to take over his families’ business? like the boy can’t even name more than 3 artists off of the top of his head?   > fwb except neither of them know what “just friends” mean.  > i would love if jun had a confidante. a best friend, a partner in crime, a total bromance 'cause i can never get enough of those. whatever label you ‘wanna put on it. wiping up each other’s messes. maybe a Betrayal in the works  > again, gonna be a wc, but i would love a “rival” of jun's on a similar level (or bigger)  that’s entirely fabricated based off of trashy articles or a misunderstood interaction online. bonus points if they’re an absolute sweetheart, well loved by most people, and generally the antithesis of jun with his multiple drug/personality rumours, which in contrast, make him seem like the bad guy. 

> party buddy. this guy hasn’t touched alcohol/cigarettes/any other stimulants since he was underage and wanted to rebel. the word “relax” does not exist in his vocabulary. Help

[si-nging-ren]

*CRACKS KNUCKLES*

okay. ive decided im going to discontinue the jirou x reader fanfic "wrong number, my bad" for a number of reasons that i will get into in a bit. i have also, however, decided to create an smau for hawks (probably not, but who ive decided on for now) x reader, based on something more personal about me. the goal of the story being more personal is to give me a better layout for how it should continue on and the feelings can be more genuine than me making up stories on a whim and hoping they work. i will give out the plan for wnmb, however, so that anybody interested can still understand how the story wouldve ended.

now as for why im abandoning wnmb.

1. i dont feel the energy to write it anymore. i dont like where the story is going, and with my current mental state and status at school, i dont have the ability to start over or try again. i font have the ideas for the story and just dont vibe with it.

2. mental reasons. i can't stick to the schedule i made for the story as well as i used to be able to, and also personal mental health reasons that sort of keep me from doing so.

3. there are personal life reasons that cause this, but jirou has slowly evolved into somewhat of a discomfort character. i dont want to get into the reasons as to why, but i dont like her that much and bad memories come up whenever i try to sit with her in my head for too long.

thats really all for why i dont want to continue wnmb, but for anybody interested, here was the plan as to how the story was planned out (via notes):

- [x] yn and mina and ochaco do be talking doe

- [x] basically introductions

- [x] same with jirou baku toko yaomomo and denks

- [x] but THEN

- [x] yn and jirou talk :DDD

- [x] jirou basically says that theyre not annoying

- [x] yn says their typical clown shit

- [x] "aidjskjdh thanks you daddy 🥺"

- [x] jirou doesnt answer for a wholeass hour

- [x] "sorry had to go to church and clense from that sin"

- [x] "o-oh okay 😔 daddy doesnt love me"

- [x] "there are so many things wrong with that"

- [x] "😳😳😳"

- [x] "im starting to wish that i blocked you"

- [x] "nONONONONO IM SORRY"

- [x] "nyways what did you wanna talk about d-"

- [x] "......."

- [x] "arling :)))"

- [x] poor jirou just wanted to know about who they are

- [x] "name, hobby, talent, interests, whatever i just wanna know about you"

- [x] yn hops over to twitter all "omg theyre so sweet 🥺🥺🥺"

- [x] naturally ochaco and mina are all "fake bestie wtf are u talking about"

- [x] yn is laughing awkwardly and is just,,, "oh nothing 😳😳"

- [x] (nobody believes them)

- [x] then they ask about jirou but she has to give false info

- [x] except for her gender its fine if she says that

- [x] she hops over to the squad

- [x] panicking

- [x] "guys wtf i think i just committed a crime"

- [x] "nono youre fine what happened"

- [x] "i made a fake identity so the person who contacted me wouldnt know it was me"

- [x] "do they even know you???"

- [x] "YES they said they really liked our music and im PANICKING"

- [x] "okok calm down its not illegal or anything"

- [x] "i think"

- [x] "YOU T H I N K ? "

- [x] "yeah sorry :// but like you did this to yourself lmaooo"

- [x] jirou awkwardly hops back to yn

- [x] "yeah i think that band is pretty cool too im actually friends with some of them"

- [x] i mean its not false

- [x] ":ooo omg rlly?????? theyre so cool aaa 🥺🥺 maybe we can meet one day at one of their concerts 👉👈 jkjk...... unless 😳"

- [x] little did they know

- [x] LMAOO jk

- [x] kinda

- [ ] they end up talking for hoursss and mina and ochaco ask one day if they wanna hang out

- [ ] theyre all "hell yesss 🥴 where we goin??"

- [ ] a bar. they go to a fucking bar. (btw its to celebrate minas new job thingyyy)

- [ ] drink responsible kiddosss

- [ ] nyways afterwards she ends up talking to jirou bout how shes super nice and would love to be friends with her more

- [ ] jirou has gay panic tm

- [ ] like actually theyre rlly cute fuck

- [ ] yn asks if they can call since theyve never heard her voice or seen her

- [ ] jirous all ".....theyre drunk they wont recognize my voice"

- [ ] also shes rlly groggy since its TWO IN THE DAMN MORNING

- [ ] jirou calls her and yn asks if she wants to meet someday bby doesnt understand okay

- [ ] jirou panics and asks if they can get to know each other more first

- [ ] yn is hurt but understands and agrees

- [ ] yn asks to play 20 questions

- [ ] jirou asks if theyre a preteen jokingly

- [ ] yn whines and says its either that or a drinking game

- [ ] not wanting yn to drink anymore, she sighs and agrees

- [ ] she ends up finding out:

1. yn has a cat

2.

3. thats it, yn passed out

- [ ] jirou fell asleep on call later nd they didnt hang up until jirou woke up later and realized that awake yn would recognize her

- [ ] she quickly hung up and then sent them a good morning text

- [ ] bitches be playin

- [ ] but yn doesnt mind theyre a gay, dumb clown

- [ ] yn asks what minas job was since they never found out- god their dumb

- [ ] mina says its the typical teaching thing but its for ome of yns favorite bands

- [ ] "ooh, who are they?"

- [ ] "they said their name was blackbear! pretty sure youve talked about them some times before"

- [ ] "omygod mina you dont understnad if you could somehow find a way for me to find them i would literally marry u"

- [ ] "please dont. but ill try boo dw"

- [ ] she ends up doing it

- [ ] but inbetween then they end up getting rlly close like numerous calls and texts and learning more about each other until they realize they like her

- [ ] yn is super happy all "bro u guys are so awesome"

- [ ] bby girl is vibrating.

- [ ] LMAOO YOU WANNA KNOW JOWNTHEY FIND OUT

- [ ] THEY AND JIROU END UP BECOMING RLLY CLOSE LIKE THEY FRIENDSSSS

- [ ] AND SHE ASKS FOR THEIR NUMBER

- [ ] THEIR STILL JITTERY BTW SO THEYRE LIKE WOAH RLLY???? ID LOVE TO BRO

- [ ] AND JIROU PUTS HER NUMBER IN YNS PHONE AND SEES THE NAME "nd strikes" COME UP ND SHES LIKE "HUH MUST BE A GLITCH"

- [ ] BUT YNS ALL

- [ ] "HAHA SOMEONE NAMED "BBY" CAME UP WHEN I TYPED IN MY NUMBER I WONDER WHO THAT IS"

- [ ] "MAYBE I TYPED IT WRONG" CAUSE BBY IS DUMB

- [ ] MEANWHILE JIROU IS PANICKED CAUSE "HOLY FUCKING SHIT THEYRE BBY"

- [ ] SO SHE HANDS THEM THIER PHONE BACK AWKWARDLY AND YN SEES THEIR OLD MESSAGES AND PANICKS

- [ ] "HOLD UP IS STARS JIROU????? HAHHA NO IM BLIND AN D DUMB SURELY NOT"

- [ ] SO THEYRE LIKE "DID U EVER TELL ANYONE UR NAME IS STARS"

- [ ] AND JIROU JUST SIGHS AND IS CLEARLY IN PAIN AND IS JUST "YEAH THATS ME"

- [ ] ALL YN DOES IS LAUGH AND GO "YO THATS KINDA GAY"

- [ ] JIROU IS PAINED

- [ ] LIKE SHE THINKS THEIR GONNA HATE HER BUT????? NO??????????? SHES CONFUSED LMAOO

- [ ] yn blinks and realizes she should probably confess or smth

- [ ] "uhm, jirou?"

- [ ] "yeah whats up?"

- [ ] "aCTUALLY NVM ILL TELL YOU LATER-"

- [ ] later in a call they say it

- [ ] jirou is rlly smart and all but her first thought was "its cause of who i am. this happened immediately after."

- [ ] some part of her is screaming that its feelings and that she likes them back but she ignores it.

- [ ] like this has to be bad right???

- [ ] nyways jirou ghosts her like a clown and rants to the band b-wordssss gc

- [ ] yn cries to the babiest of the babies 🥺🥺🥺 gc

- [ ] yn asks if she just doesnt care about them now that shes seen them

- [ ] jirou realizes "wait fuck maybe im wrong"

- [ ] spoiler alert: she is

- [ ] she sort of goes "i didnt rlly think that you actually liked me actually

- [ ] yn starts crying

- [ ] (this is over call btw)

- [ ] "why tf wouldnt i?!"

- [ ] "bc you confessed right after you knew who i was"

- [ ] "istfg so our conversations just dont matter ig"

- [ ] jirou is confused

- [ ] like??? she gets that theyre mad but she does understand why so much

- [ ] "listen i just need to know if you like me back or not please. before i start crying again."

- [ ] she decided to not comment on how they were already crying

- [ ] "yes i like you okay"

- [ ] "do you actually?"

- [ ] "yes. istag that i actually like you and im not shitting u. if you want ill go there rn"

- [ ] ".....yes pls"

- [ ] "i need your address though"

- [ ] "oh yeah– its *address*"

- [ ] jirou arrives all nervous and shit

i didn't have anything planned out after that, but it was probably gonna be a kiss scene or something idk

[wickymicky]

wickymicky’s Top Ten Kpop Songs of 2020

5: Weki Meki - Cool

At the start of this year, Weki Meki were already one of my favorite groups. My url has been wickymicky for a while, though I would have placed the group at like 4th or 5th if I listed my favorite groups in order. Yoojung has been my number one ult bias for a long time, but the group overall wasnt one of my absolute top ults initially. As it went on though, I really fleshed out my love for all members of Weki Meki during the year. Dazzle Dazzle and Oopsy were big moments for me, even though neither of those songs were what I hoped they would be. Don’t get me wrong, I love them, but not the same way that I love Picky Picky, Tiki Taka, La La La, IDLYG, etc. Once Oopsy came out, I thought it was pretty guaranteed that I wouldn’t have a Weki Meki song in my top 10, despite my appreciation for them as a group growing every day. By that point, they were absolutely one of my ults. Weki Meki are tied with Dreamcatcher for my favorite groups in kpop now. But… their 2020 releases just didn’t hit the way I wanted them to… until Cool

It’s funny, I had a feeling that it was gonna be good. I couldn’t explain it lol. I didn’t expect a third comeback, I thought they wouldn’t follow Oopsy up until sometime in 2021. But for some reason, when they announced it, I just had some gut feeling that it was gonna be different. Even before teasers started dropping. I was right, too. It’s very different. God it’s so good lol. I’m gonna be honest though, a large part of the reason it’s landing here in the top 5 is because of just how invested I am in Weki Meki lol. I guess we used the term “biases” for a reason, huh? I’m pretty biased lol. One of the most exciting things about this song is just that it gave me lots of opportunities to see Weki Meki shine.

For what it’s worth though, I do think this song is really high quality all on its own. It’s not just that I’m biased, because this song would be high on my list regardless. I love the production. I love the way that main low synth sounds, I love the way it kinda warps up and down as it plays... it’s a striking sound. The first part of the chorus is pretty monotone (the “Cool. jom deo tteugeopge.” part), and I wasn’t sure if that would begin to annoy me, but it hasn’t really. I like it. I think it’s fine because the second part of the chorus is different and has more singing, I think that helps the monotone part feel more like a cool addition to the song rather than a detractment. A lot of it feels really smartly written, imo. It’s not the most amazing and moving and powerful song ever recorded, but for a song called Cool about being cool... it definitely feels and sounds cool lol. Also, I think the members gave some of their best performances of their careers so far. Both in the song itself as well as on stage. They silenced anyone who would try to write them off as being “just Dodaeng” or “nugus”. Suyeon got a solo dance part and she pulled it off with overwhelming charisma. Lucy is establishing herself even more as the group’s other rapper, and her personality in her rap parts feels distinct from Yoojung. Rina, Elly, and Sei are also killing it and turning heads, I’ve seen a lot of appreciation for them all over. And of course, Dodaeng themselves aren’t slouching either. Doyeon’s presence in this song is amazing, she’s really making use of her talent for conveying that energy. Yoojung’s rap and dance skills are honed to the finest point they’ve ever been, she’s my ult for a reason. Love that little tomato.

Oh yeah, and there’s one other member I didn’t mention. Bro. Dude. What the fuck happened lol. Lua evolved this year. It’s like she just flipped a switch and decided “you know what? every comeback from this point onwards is gonna be my era” and she made it happen. It’s not just a haircut, it’s her entire energy. She’s overflowing with confidence. She’s always been talented, always been confident, always been zany and ridiculous and funny, but I’ve never seen her exude as much of it as she has during the Oopsy and Cool eras haha. Unprecedented levels. Her parts in Cool are the most iconic parts of the song, hands down. She steals every scene she’s in, and it’s hard to watch performances of the choreo without just watching her. Again, it’s not just her haircut, which was even shorter in this era than it was during Oopsy, I think, even the way she dances is different. It’s like she took off some limiters that were mentally preventing her from popping completely off while dancing, and now she’s free haha. She had moments of that in the past, but nothing like this. Even when she’s doing the same moves everyone else is, she does them with such style, in a way that’s very much her own. She really gives Yoojung a run for her money as the main dancer of the group, and the idea that theyre both co-main dancers has never been more true. Lua destroyed Cool, and I’m not sure what it would be like without her. You know what’s up.

Uh, anyway lol, yeah this song is great. I think Kick It and some of the others below it might be better songs at just the fundamental base level, but I enjoyed this song at a threshold that was pretty much unmatched this year. It’s ranking here at 5th place, but actually it’s the song I’ve listened to the second most this year. It came out in October, and in just three short months I listened to it more than I listened to any other song this year (except for one, lol). And the wildest part is that I don’t even think it’s in my top 3 Weki Meki title tracks haha. When I say I love this group, I mean it

links to the rest of the list: 10 - Fiesta (Izone) 9 - Crossroads (GFriend) 8 - Assa (Cignature) 7 - Boca (Dreamcatcher) 6 - Kick It (NCT 127) 5 - Cool (Weki Meki) 4 - La Di Da (Everglow) 3 - Mago (GFriend) 2 - Tag Me (Weeekly) 1 - Scream (Dreamcatcher)

[acrobaticcatfeline]

Of Books, Brothers, and Broadway (Creativitwins College AU) Chapter One!!!

Word Count: 1771

TW: So Remus, obviously, swearing, ocean mentions, sea creatures and reptiles, and I think that’s it!

Pairings: None yet. This chapter is just a ton of platonic creativitwins!

Notes: This is three pages that I wrote last night. I’m now at ten pages of this. I don’t know what I was possessed by but I’m not about to complain. Its a college AU, I mention it I think, but Roman is a theatre major and Remus is a marine biology major with a minor in creative writing. I’m excited for you guys to see more of this!

Summary: “Bro!!! Bro I found a giant ass lizard in the yard look at it bro!!!” Roman and Remus Reyes live together. They figured it would be cost effective to do so while in college. Roman deals with Remus’ reptiles and fish tank, Remus deals with Romans singing at 3 in the morning. They’ve had an interesting relationship, and when Remus reminds Roman of a deal they made years ago, hes ready to start crying. Can a couple of kids from Florida make a Broadway musical?

“Bro!!! Bro I found a giant ass lizard in the yard look at it bro!!!”

Roman was done with his brothers bullshit. He doesn't know where he got the bright idea that the two of them should cohabitate in an apartment during college, but as he panickedly climbs onto the kitchen counters to escape him he knows he must've been on some sort of drug. He released a scream as he backed into the corner of the room as his brother held out a lizard that was definitely going to jump and attack him.

“GET IT AWAY!!! ITS SLIMY AND GROSS AND MALICIOUS!!!”

“This little guy malicious? Nah bro, that's a you problem. He's so cuteeee look at his scales they’re almost a holographic!”

That caught Roman's attention. He stopped panicking to actually look at the critter in his brother's hands. Remus was right, he was almost holographic. Roman gave it a weak smile and Remus beamed.

“See? It's not that scary! I'm gonna keep him! He's gonna be named fred!”

Roman chuckled softly as his brother finally left and brought the lizard to his room. He slipped off the counter and followed at a safe distance.

“Don't you think you have enough reptiles? If you keep getting more you'll need more heat lamps and i'm giving you more of the electric bill”

“Ok fair point but hear me out, have you ever seen a collared lizard quite as colorful as this one? I mean he's such a pretty one aint he?”

Roman took more steps forward, relaxing once the lizard was placed in the terrarium. The lizard was quite colorful, and Roman couldn't deny, it was one of the prettiest ones Remus had captured. It immediately scurried around and dived into the water bowl. Roman laughed at it.

“Besides, he was just begging to be brought in! Like really this time! He kept bumping into my feet, he started climbing my pants leg, it was so cute you should've seen it!”

“I'm sure I would have cried.”

Remus chuckled as he moved to the other wall of his room covered in a giant aquarium that Roman was still amazed fit through the doors. Remus grinned at all the fish swimming around, tipping a good portion of fish food into the tank after turning off the filter. He then made his way to his bed and sat on the twin sized mattress covered with octopus blankets. He grinned at his brother and Roman rolled his eyes.

“When are you finally kidnapping an octopus huh?”

“I'm glad you asked! You know my internship right?”

“Of course, the only time you don't talk about the marine institute is when youre talking about your reptiles”

Remus popped up and grabbed Roman's wrist and dragged him to the whiteboard calendar that hung on the outside of his door, pointing excitedly at tomorrow's date while bouncing on his toes.

“Well they just got an octopus buddy in that needs constant care that they don't have the time for! She's real fucked up, she needs meds twice a day, she needs to be hand fed, its a real fucked up case, they were rescued from a seaworld copycat, the poor thing hasn't been healthy since it hatched we think. There's a chance that she won't even be able to be released cuz she's been so dependent on humans for her whole life. But they opened up for applicants, and I was the only one willing to take her in. they're coming and checking my tank tomorrow and if it is good enough, which i'm certain it will be, and then they'll hand her over and i’ll be her caretaker!”

Roman grinned at the excitement his brother had. He ruffled his hair quickly.

“That's cool rem. I'm happy for you. She got a name?”

“Mhmm! Her name is Cephanie! But I've been calling her Cephy. She's so pretty ro, i can't wait for you to meet her! And she's so friendly!”

“You know every day I get less confused at your choice in major. And more confused about your minor”

Remus grinned at Roman and released his wrist, skipping over to their kitchen, relishing in the fact that Roman followed still. He poured himself a cup of coffee and jumped onto the counter with a grin still plastered to his face. He took a sip from his mug, the one with a tentacle handle, and kicked his feet.

“I don't know why! It's totally sensical to have a minor in creative writing ro! It's not like you can expect me to be your playwright if i don't know what i'm doing! Besides, i can write epic lovecraftian horrors that aren't incredibly racist and who doesn't want that?”

Roman blinked. He had to process what Remus had said and he was still confused. His head tilted like a dogs.

“My playwright?”

Remus giggled, it was funny when Remus giggled, it wasn't a sound that you would expect to come out of him. And yet he did it often.

“Did you forget? Aw ro, you can't back out on it now, you asked me when we were still in middle school to write you a book for a musical, and you were gonna write the music and you kept saying you were gonna get it on broadway. I've held up my end of the deal! In fact, I actually have a story started, I think you're gonna love it! Course, i haven't written it all out yet, it's gonna be my final”

“Wait, you remembered that? Rem we were like 10!”

“And now we’re 21, what's your point?”

“We, we can't get on broadway! We’re a couple of idiots from florida! I’m, i'm not a musician, I'm barely even a dancer, what are you talking about? That was a fever dream from a couple of kids, it's not like we can actually do it!”

Remus frowned. He set his mug of coffee down and hopped off of the counter. He crossed his arms over his chest and gave Roman a serious look.

“Do you know when lin manuel miranda wrote his first broadway musical?”

“No i-”

“His sophomore year of college. Who says we can't do the same? Roman you under sell your talents. You're a theatre major, you may not be amazing at any instruments other than your voice but damn bro, your voice is good enough on its own. I've seen you dance, you're one of the best dancers i've ever seen and you're in your fourth year of college. We have potential. I know we can do this if we try, but i can't make it happen alone. I need your help”

Roman looked lost. He wanted, oh so desperately he wanted, to make it happen. It had always been a dream of his to make it to broadway, but he wasn't wrong, they weren't lin manuel miranda, they were some twins from florida, they had no idea what they were doing. And yet. And yet he held out his hand to his brother.

“Ok. ok, we can try this. I can, I can make a score. We can do this”

Remus grinned again and took Roman's hand. He tugged him into the living room. He sat on the couch, pulling out his notebook and flipping to a bookmarked page. Roman sat next to him and looked over at it. There were a few doodles around a plotline that was both gorey and Romantic a la sweeney todd but also quite similar to ella enchanted. Remus grinned at the book and then started explaining.

“Ok so the main character, played by you presumably, is an author”

“Did you just write out your personal fantasy Remus?”

“No, shut up! Ok so he's written several books, like neil gaiman or terry pratchet level several, but those aren't all the stories he's made, he has several stories that have never seen the light of day. He writes his stories in notebooks and journals ordinarily, waiting until they’re fully developed to make them digital. In one of these notebooks there lies a bit of magic. So he writes in this unknowingly, writes of a powerful magician, and as he sleeps it awakes. The magician escapes and brings each of his hundreds of creations to life just the same as him. The characters run amok and the author awakes to see the most beautiful man he's ever met at the foot of his bed. It takes him seeing the magician running through his home to realize that these are his characters. And the man is the protagonist from his most famous novel, one he wrote as a guilty pleasure, writing of a man he had met in his dreams. And he finds that these characters were pulled from different points in their books. The character had been pulled from the early pages, after he had suffered a major trauma and had no clue of the powers he possessed. So now, with his dream man in his living room, in pain from an event he had written, and gifted with emotionally driven powers, he has to fix this mess with the added hurdle of the character creating villains and fiends ready to destroy humanity as a whole with no way to stop. Along the way, some of his characters suffer mortal wounds at the hands of heinous and violent creatures, and all the author has is one magic notebook to fight them off. Romantic plot between the author and dream MC, with angst from the reality of once everything is dealt with, he will have to go back to the book. Thats what ive got so far, what do you think?”

Roman is starry eyed. It's far less violent than Remus’ normal brand of writing, it doesn't inherently include any sea monsters or snake men, and it's something Roman can really appreciate. He loves it, he can already feel the gears turning for songs and dances. Now that he heard the actual story instead of just going on the drawings, he saw far more nutcracker vibes from it. 

“Oh, and there's a happy ending or whatever that the author gets to like, marry the other MC, and everyone lives happily ever after. I know you like the cutesy shit”

“Remus this is amazing! I can't believe I hesitated, I already have some ideas for the score! Remus you're a genius. I love you!”

Roman launched into a hug with Remus, which had the other laughing. Remus hugged him back.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

It was Roman's turn to turn into a giggling mess.

Taglist: @fivebyfive-finebyfive @tacohippy56900 @analogical-mess @crookedlyoptimisticdestiny @angels-and-dreams @fandomloverangel

Let me know if you want to be tagged in my writing!!!

Thank you for reading I will see you later ladies lords and nonbinary royalty!!!

[jawnjendes]

the fog will clear up | shawn mendes

chapter 13/?, university au, shawn x goth oc

AN: sry its short and definitely a filler im sry its boring but it helps build up stuff thatll happen next ok ok im sry

*let me know if u wanna be added/removed from the taglist

masterlist | playlist

Annalise woke with a start. She was wide awake immediately. There was no room for sleepily rolling around the sheets, her eyes weren't heavy like always. She didn't know what dying and coming back to life felt like, but she was pretty sure it felt something like that. She had a weird urge to go for a jog.

Staring at the ceiling, Annalise reached towards the nightstand next to her, intending to grab her phone. Her hand touched the bottle, and she picked it up anyway, reading the prescription label.

Annalise Flores SERTRALINE 50MG TABLET Brand name: Zoloft

"You don't waste anytime, huh?" she murmured before setting it back down. Then, she grabbed her phone and checked the time.

8:47am. A new fucking record. Annalise rolled out of bed, unable to stay still.

In the 2 hours she had to kill before work, she tidied up the dorm, ate a decent breakfast, took a shower, and got started on the course work she had to make up. The energy levels were through the roof, she had never been so on edge and productive at the same time. Why wasn't she put on sertraline sooner? Sure, she felt hyperaware and borderline anxious, but that was apart of the process of getting on a new antidepressant. She was getting things done this way. Sure, she jumped when the lock on the door jiggled, but she was up and running anyway!

If she wasn't, she wouldn't have seen Stella entering the dorm. She was surprised to see Annalise on the couch, looking like a deer in headlights.

"Oh… I thought you were asleep. I'll, uh, I'll come back."

"No, wait!" Annalise sounded a little too frantic, but it did stop Stella from leaving. "Uh, come sit down! Please!"

Stella narrowed her eyes slightly as she went to the couch. At least she was willing to listen.

"I, uh, I'm sorry," Annalise began, rubbing the back of her neck. "I'm sorry for what I said. A stupid guy isn't the only good in my life. I have you. You matter to me, and I'm sorry for making you feel like you don't." She really couldn't stop herself from rambling. "I miss you. I miss seeing you here between classes, and I miss your optimism because a bitch could use some of that. And, and I'm sorry for the negativity I've brought in here. I'm working on it now, I swear. Just… come back. Come home… because bro, you're my wife, dude."

It could have been funny, but there was nothing funny about the way she said it. Her eyes were wide and pleading, and she was rubbing her hands together. Stella merely blinked her hazel eyes, nearly overwhelmed by that string of words.

"Look at you, expressing your emotions," she said after a while. "I can see why you hold it back."

Annalise nodded rapidly. "It's my first day on a new medication. Got me all sorts of hyped up, but I'll mellow out in a couple of weeks. And I'm taking therapy seriously again!"

Stella was surprised. "Oh, I see. Well… I've missed you too. Bro…"

"Bro?"

"I'll come home too. Camila's bed is too small for the two of us."

"Bro…"

"I know. I have to update you on all that."

"Br-"

"Okay!" Stella broke out a smile and stood up. "Dame un abrazo, puta."

That was much easier than Annalise had anticipated. She stood up and hugged her best friend, relieved. Stella wasn't one to hold a grudge, nor was she as stubborn as her roommate. It was another person to cross off the list.

~

Shawn had social media mainly to get his music out there. Yes, he interacted with his friends on Snapchat, and some fans on Twitter. Most of the time, Shawn just tweeted when he had new music coming out. He didn't check any of his social media very often, not even to stalk Ann's accounts because she was rarely on her's. He didn't even have his notifications on, purely to keep himself from the possibility of getting too attached to the opinions of random strangers online.

That was why he woke up that morning to a number of texts from Camila.

"SHAAWWNWNN"

"SHAWN IM LKTERSLLY BALD RN"

"CHEKC UR TWITTER RIGHT NOW!!!!!!"

"YOIR FOLLOWERS!!! AAHSKSKSK"

"SKSKSK SHAWNMM IM SCRAMING"

So to Twitter he went. Shawn rubbed sleep out of his eye as he went to his profile. He had around 10k to begin with, that he built up on his own over the last couple of years. He nearly dropped his phone on his face as he read the new number.

50.2k

"What… the fuck?" he breathed out as he sat up in his bed. He scrolled through the list, making sure this wasn't a series of spam bots.

His mentions were just as wild, and it explained the sudden blow up.

@hollaestor: @shawnmendes hiii bella told me to follow you

@samxriv: @shawnmendes i am free to hang out on tuesday to hang out when i am free

@gisellenjh: @shawnmendes bella sent me here and im glad she did! loving your music!

And there were plenty more like that. There were so many tweets, Shawn couldn't even get through all of them. It was making his head spin. There was only one Bella he knew about too… He just couldn't spell her last name. Thankfully, her handle was just @bellasanti, and it was the first one to pop up when he typed it in the search bar.

Right under Bella Santiago's name and the blue checkmark were the two little words: Follows you. Shawn refreshed the page ten times before it sank in. This YouTuber, who has over 2 million followers, somehow found Shawn's music… and she liked it. She liked it enough to tweet about it… 3 days ago.

@bellasanti: underrated spotify artists: @shawnmendes. give him a listen. send him some love. truly talented guy💖

Shawn had only overheard Bella's videos when Ann was watching them in the other room. He never really watched any of her content. But he wanted to pass out at the fact that she took the time to listen to his music and tweet about him. He wanted to jump on the bed. He wanted to call-

He texted Camila back. "Wtf why did no one tell me sooner?? This is so crazy!!!!!"

"We thought you knew and you were keeping it from us!! LMAO congrats rockstar!"

He couldn't believe it. His follower count was rising. He was getting emails from Spotify saying his songs were being added to many different playlists.

@shawnmendes: @bellasanti wow thank you so much! Love you bella❤

He deleted the last bit before tweeting it. Holy shit. Shawn lied back down on the mattress, completely breathless.

How does someone like Bella Santiago find Shawn out in cyberspace? What Spotify rabbit hole did she go down that led her to him? How many of his songs did she listen to? How many songs did she save to her library? How many of those playlist emails were from her? Shawn had so many questions.

~

There were two things Annalise noticed when she was out on the courtyard after Biology. The first thing was a table on the side of the walkway, with a handmade banner hanging off the front. It read in big letters: Shawn Mendes: Live at The Cameron House. Brian, Alessia. and Camila were all sat on the same side at this table, talking to a student who was interested in the little display.

"The lounge called back," Annalise muttered to herself.

The other thing Annalise noticed was Patrick sitting under a tree nearby, reading a book. She went to him first.

The last time she had spoken to Patrick was when they cut up flowers together. He was never one to explicitly state when something has upset him, and he has seen Annalise in a depressive episode before. Annalise knew him well. Patrick kept his distance because he didn't like the negativity around her, and he couldn't afford any more of it himself.

"Hey," she greeted.

His blue eyes tore away from his book to meet her gaze. "'Sup?"

"Trying to be less fucked in the head," she told him.

Patrick nodded in approval. "Cool."

That was all that was needed for the two of them. Content, Annalise turned and went for the table. A small line had formed when she wasn't looking, so she waited behind the last person. However, with three people running the thing, Annalise got to the front fairly quick.

"Oh, she actually showed up," Brian chimed, amused.

"Meaning?" Annalise asked.

"Thought you were too pissed at Shawn to care about his show, that's all."

She swallowed the pit of annoyance, discovering that even more people knew about that. Brian is his friend, though, of course he'd know.

"Selling tickets or something?" Annalise turned her attention to the two girls.

"Yeah! Ten dollars a piece!" Alessia explained.

"Cool, I'll take one."

Just as she opened the flap on her book bag, Camila spoke up.

"Wait. I'm pretty sure Shawn said he wanted to buy you your ticket himself."

Annalise rolled her eyes. "Well, he's not here and I can do things for myself." She pulled out her wallet and paid her own goddamn ticket.

Camila breathed out a laugh. "Are you ever gonna let him do anything nice for you?"

None of your fucking business.

A new thought occurred to Annalise. "Why are tickets being sold for this show? Aren't his gigs usually free?"

"There's more production going into this one," Brian told her. "The lounge gave him the option to make it a ticketed event, and we need to make back what we already put into it. So now, it won't be a performance, it'll be Shawn's performance."

Shawn already knew how to make an audience his bitch, but…

"Alright then." Annalise shrugged and then accepted her ticket and receipt from Alessia.

The ticket alone was already quite extravagant. There were little red roses designed around the edges. This boy really loved his fucking flowers.

"I'm guessing rose petals will fall from the ceiling or something?" she guessed with a chuckle.

"I was given strict orders to not spoil anything," Brian told her, folding his arms.

The two had a mini staredown until Annalise shrugged again. "Whatever."

Then, Camila piped up again, suddenly excited. "Ooh, Ann did you hear? Bella Santiago followed Shawn on Twitter!"

"She what?" Annalise stupidly replied.

Camila practically squealed. "She gave him a shoutout too! He's blowing up on Spotify! Isn't that awesome?"

Annalise wanted to say something, but her brain wasn't quite caught up yet. So she just walked away.

The other three students watched her leave. Needless to say, they were confused.

"Is she ever gonna be happy for him?" Alessia wondered.

"I think she was excited?" Camila said tilting her head.

"I can't believe Shawn is going through all this trouble for that," Brian said with a scoff.

"I can still hear you!" Annalise called over her shoulder as she kept walking.

All three of them went red in the face, embarrassed. Brian would have made a comment about her being a vampire with supersonic hearing, but he didn't want to be called out again.

_______

taglist: @normalcyisoverrated-beyou  @ilsolee @mendesromano @1-800-khalid-mendussy @kitykatnumber @strangerliaa @iloveshawnieboi @goldenmndes @shawnvvmendes @shawnsunflower @shawmndes @ruinhoney @someoneunimportantxx @calyumthomas @yourdeflightfullyleft @havethetimeeofyourlifee @wronglanemendes @chillingbythesea @softmendesss @mutuallynotmutual

[letstalksymphogear]

Symphogear, EP.7 (Cont.)

“i have not now, nor ever, liked this creepy ass church elevator.”

“kanade please get out of my head, just because im hungry doesnt mean you have to tell me every time i am”

Hibiki finishes getting a full body X-ray. She’s fine.

“that anime protagonist immunity is really kicking in well!”

“by the way, your wife is here! and she’s looking mighty miffed., as opposed to me, mighty milfed.”

“you dont strike me as a mother figure but ill play along for now”

“i just hope miku’s okay...”

“oh, she’ll be fine! see, i’ve seen these kinds of plots before. big secret revealed, another lover is shown, the victim watches as they’re thoroughly cheated on, and they get to lik-”

“please stop breathing”

Genjuro’s wasting away again in Margaritaville. Looking for some daughter to adopt. SOME PEOPLE SAY THAT THERE’S A, WOOOOMAAAAAN TO BLAAAAAAAAAAME, BUT HE KNOWS

XYLOPHONE RIFF

THAT’S IT’S ALL HIS FAULT

XYLOPHONE RIFF

“i hate it when he gets like this. jimmy buffets not a good look for him.”

“for once you and i agree. seeing the commander sulk like this like a middle aged perma-tourist is genuinely miserable”

“hey homies! im back and i brought some bitches! oh, jesus, why does this place smell like mistakes in miami?”

“its me. im sorry. every time i feel like i failed as a dad, my anti-dad energies manifest. imagine every midlife crisis rolled up into a single ball, smacked into the face for eternity. thats the depth of my pain for failing this girl.”

In a moment of positivity, the friendship between Tsubasa and Hibiki is cemented.

> Tsubasa has joined the party.

“FRIENDSHIP!”

“fweindship.”

“uuuuhhhhh... dadship? yeah thats close enough.”

“WE’RE ALL GOOD FRIENDS!”

“ya tiddies are ringing again, better go get it”

Ryoko also points out that Hibiki’s relic is fusing with herself at an alarming rate. This is important to keep in mind.

Meanwhile, at night.

Miku is posing in the motherly “you done fucked up, where have you been young lady” position. A cold scolding is coming.

“.........................hey miku......”

“you can come in. are you worried im gonna bite? you suplexed a car. that shouldn’t be an issue anymore.”

“miku, i.... i wanted to tell you.... but.... the plot wouldn’t let me, miku....”

“should’ve told the plot to fuck off anyway. now you’re gonna live with that. you’re sleeping... on the bottom bunk.”

“b.... b..... b...... b.... b...... bottom bunk...?”

They slept separately that night. God, this is so stupid. All of this is so goddamned stupid. “I’m so mad at you even though you saved my life.” This is just so. AUGH. THIS IS DUMB. KANEKO WRITE BETTER ANGST THAT MAKES SENSE THAT ISN’T THIS.

Meanwhile, far away from this garbage...

Chris, having been evicted from Fine’s McMansion, wanders the streets of mumblemumble aimlessly. Don’t be fooled by her new fancy dress. Basically, she’s a combat-competent hobo.

“no food. no home. no victories. this sucks. whyd you do it, fine? we coulda been great together. but no. ya fired me. now i look like im prancing the red light district with a highly advanced superweapon around my neck.”

“no... hibiki’s to blame. ever since that genderbent little mac showed up to fight me, it’s been all downhill. fine thought me a laughstock because i couldnt take out her oversized boxing gloves, and now she beat me while i had nehushtan. god... i wish i never met that damn hamster faced chubby cheeked nerd.”

“wait, whats that crying”

Chris spies two kids talking to each other, one of them crying. Chris immediately makes an assumption, believing the big bro is bullying his sis.

“hey! stop nicking her lunch money, twerp”

Chris currently is a firm believer of corporeal punishment.

But the sister deflects the blow. Chris can’t even defeat children right now. Truly, this is a record low for her. You know you blew it when even kids are schooling you on basic morality. She then tells the little girl to stop crying, ironically mirroring her brother.

The infamous double T-Pose maneuver. Chris, you might as well get a shovel and start digging your own grave.

“i keep doing bad things badly, and now im doing good things badly... when fine said i was bad... did she just mean im not talented?”

Chris, finally, does a good thing and helps these kids find their parents.

“yeah. hibiki saved a kid when she got her gear. guess what? bam! im saving two! that’s fifty percent more kid per kid saved. take that, weirdo.”

The kids call her out on Chris singing unconsciously, and Chris gets flustered over it. Dawwwwww.

Chris manages to get them to safety to their Dad...

...while brutally lying about it, making Chris look like a predator. There’s a very crushing irony at play here, given who Chris used to serve.

“ugggggggggggggggghhhhhh hes not even gonna payyyyy meeeeeee why the fuck did i dooooo thiiiiiiissssss”

“hey, you know. you kids have a really nice relationship with one another. care to give me tips on how to be an empathetic human being capable of making friends?”

“maybe we’re born with it”

“maybe its maybeline”

“maybeline...”

Meanwhile...

A cold wind blows through Lydian Apartment 69-L. (I don’t actually know if that’s their room number, I just made it up.)

“jesus take the wheel, because i’m jumping out the passenger seat to save this current wreck of a relationship”

“miku please i saved your life, doesnt that count for anything”

“you already killed me the moment you lied. also im taking the bottom bunk so i dont have to see your face coming down the ladder.”

“miku you cant hide in this depression den forever. i know i hurt you and im sorry for it, but please understand i literally couldnt do it. you saw there were punches and violence and stuff... i didnt want you tied to that...”

“what was that? i cant hear your apologies over my incredibly loud snoring. SNOOOOOOORE. SNOOOOOOOORE. SNOOO- fuck, i just swallowed my spit, fuck”

“i hope this cocoon of displeasure you’ve made for yourself lets you erupt into a butterfly of acceptance so i can fly with you again.”

“......thats not fair. you cant say those beautiful metaphors and get away with it. let me be mad... sniff... let me be mad...”

Sadness wafts in the den of lies Hibiki has been forced into.

No music plays. There is only heartbreak, and woe.

In the midst of this pain...

Ryoko loredumps about how the Symphogears work and are immune to the noise on her blog, ‘hornyonmainforscience.org’, her hybrid science journal slash kink zone. It’s mostly a recap with some pretty good soft techno beats in it.

“i made a custom brew of red bull, five hour energy drink, coffee, and cream. i call it gamer girl piss.”

“damn. that’s some good piss.”

She muses about how Hibiki has managed to break the limitations of her Symphogear, making her a totally unique specimen. Wait, where have we heard this before...?

Hey... Ryoko... let’s just... cool it a bit with the Hibiki pictures... come on...

Ryoko touches upon the Custodians and the Curse of Babel. We ain’t touching that shit until later, because that’s another shitfuck box of crazy just ready to jump us in a dark alleyway to rob us of our wits.

Back to Lydian:

“miku whats the answer to the first three multiple choice questions”

“B. A. D.”

“oh, thanks. huh, BAD.”

“yeah. you are.”

“mmm. taste likes dissapointment. just like my life.”

“hey table for two haha get it cause there’s two chairs and miku for the love of god, please, forgive me”

“ive surgically removed my eyes and drew eyelashes over them with sharpie so i dont have to see your bird bangs.”

“thats very rude to both me and my hair. also, wig.”

Even Hibiki’s meal is judging her. Mainly for not eating it. Fucking look at this. God, that looks amazing. Fuck, why did I write this while I was hungry.

“miku you cant do this forever. i might die and youll end up crying on my tombstone going ‘oh god, why, oh god’, and really, i cant live with myself if that happens. mainly because id already be dead by then”

The Anime Janai crew show up to break some icebergs with a goddamn sledgehammer. As the self-aware Gods of this realm, they got very tired of this poor display of angst, and have decided to directly intervene.

Nevermind. They came for her kneecaps, and they most certainly got them.

PLEASE. I’M BEGGING YOU. END THIS GARBAGE PLOT THREAD.

“look. imma lay down the facts. yall are gay. yall are in love. yall are angry for the wrong reasons. its nobody’s fault here but the writer. so please kiss and make up. pretty please.”

“kaneko... you fool... we all know what the original sin is. its your hack writing making this stupidity in the first place. let the pencil go, asshole!”

They bring up the fact that Hibiki isn’t doing her work and wonder if she has a job on the side, which isn’t allowed by the school. Miku gets annoyed and bails, with Hibiki running after her. Unfortunately, Miku runs faster...

“oh god miku not the rooftop whatever you’re thinking just dont do it! please!”

“no. i came here to angst, since this is the Maximum Angst Zone.”

“i..... okay! okay, that’s fair! rooftops are the perfect place to look sad while getting proper air ventilation, thats fine”

It really would have been better played if it was played off that she felt hurt not because of the lie, but because she felt like she could have helped her better having known the truth, and it being a self-loathing sort of scenario for not being there better for her and not fully understanding the risk at play.

But no, instead, we get this.

Absolutely obliterated. A heart ripped, shredded, and sent to the Shadow Realm.

The episode ends on that note, but has a post credit scene.

Naked. On an old timey telephone. On a computer. Wearing stockings and long gloves.

The main antagonist of the series, everybody.

She’s talking the best English possible to some random-ass American when suddenly bursting through the scene is none other than:

“I WANT WORKERS COMPENSATION YOU BITCH, BEFORE I UNIONIZE YOUR NAKED ASS”

“AND I WANT A GOOD REFERNECE FOR MY FUTURE EMPLOYER, AND ALSO A SEVERANCE PACKAGE SINCE I’M FUCKING HOMELESS”

“i paint my eyelashes with mascara made from the tar of freshly carbonated corpses manufactured through noise, what on gods green earth compels you to think id give a rats ass about you?”

“so you never cared, huh! you’re just a nasty naked hedonist trying to- trying to- what the fuck are you even trying to do?!”

“i want to live the dream every spicy little fossil like me yearns for.”

“I WANNA FUCK GOD!”

“how- what? what? how do you even- what? are you- do you want to be the pope? is that it? does the pope get to fuck god? are you- is this a larping thing? you’ve really been into larping lately! i don’t like this!”

“youve never read the old testament, have you. ass out, pussy bare, hips up and barefoot. that’s how god’s always liked it.”

“now get lost, punk. you tipped off my hand to genjuro and now you being here is going to ruin everything. if you still feel any semblance of devotion, eat one of your own bullets and call it a day.”

“it’s 2012 bitch, if the mayans dont get you, I WILL”

“what god gives, He takes away, and so do i. i built you from the ground up. your relic, which was good for jack shit on you. the nehushtan, which you failed to do anything with except zap a couple hundred people. stop wars? you’re a walking war, waged by me, for me. and your cartridge has just run out of bullets.”

“uh oh! hand’s acting up again! better bail before i send you back to smacktown where all the bitter little shittalkers like you strut around spending their lives being useless as hell.”

“ah fuck, im not dealing with no manos: the hands of fate bullshit again”

“and guess what else i got on motherfucker”

“i see the union efforts have officially been busted. understandable, have a nice day ma’am”

“LEAVE.”

“I’M GOING, I’M GOING”

[zepdeans]

there’s not a lot I can say about s3 that hasn’t already been said (and articulated 200x better) but! here are some of my (albeit dumb) thoughts :~)

ep1 -isak leaning against the bathroom wall gets me EVERY time its such a powerful scene esp introducing you to s3 and tarjei..... spare some talent for the rest of us please -LiTeN gUtTeN fRa StRaNgEr tHiNgS -isak rly ties his pants w a shoelace...... -isak noticing even for the first time bc of his laugh.. whew.... also. i love this intro SOOO much bc its so non-monumental? theres no dramatic music or whatever but its not subtle.... like you know right away o shit love interest!! hello sir!! bc isak’s expression watching him :’) i could go on -isak is a bad liar HOWEVER this only applies to stupid nontrivial things e.g. the black sweatshirt. but when you look at him lying about like, his sexuality, he hides that shit well -”c00l” isak. i hate u so much -honestly all u have to do is look at even for .2 seconds and u can tell this boy has had a crush for a solid month bc he just looks awestruck (HOWEVER henrik’s acting is *chef’s kiss* bc its subtle enough to go undetected b4 you actually know eVEN SAW HIM ON THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL) -even isak and emma all sitting on the bench together is funny enough on its on but then a song called threeway comes on and like. julie sdshjsfdjfkjskd ep2 -there’s something so endearing about even’s handwriting idek what -i LOVE even’s video w mikael it reveals so much about him to us- how weird (ok we saw how weird he was w the paper towel thing but) and dorky he is? and his love of film! his view on love stories and how he sees the world :( but it also shows a lot abt isak because he saw even making stupid jokes about vladimir putin and was like yeah we about to fall in LOVE love -isak not using headphones to watch even’s video or r+j?? bde or general incompetence what’s the verdict guys -the isak watching r+j scene hits so hard like yall ever think about isak lying in bed at 3am staring at the ceiling probably thinking about how he’s never gonna get a beautiful world-shattering romance like that like ..... also him changing positions skam get out of my life go away ur too realistic -not to make this even more self-projection-y but isak simultaneously being the least emotionally vulnerable person ever but crying during r+j > -i made a post abt this already but even’s INTENSE staring vs isak’s “i have never looked anyone in the eye in my life” gets me it says so much about their characters -even said i see your bde move (asking me to buy you beer) and i raise u with my own (inviting you to my house after faking not having my id) -”if you listen to music” even is such a dick fsdjhsdff -when the message comes on...... i rlly do owe julie my life huh -”have you heard about my rapping?” “I have actually” have we talked about this enough????? 1. isak finally feels comfortable enough w even to flirt and his first move is to RAP for him jesus christ. keep in mind this is the same man who pulled that smooth af ibuprofen line w emma like...... 2. even has heard about isak’s rapping. either this means im-not-on-social-media even went out of his way to go thru homeboy’s instagram OR isak’s rapping is actually talked about. i- -the group chat messages. cant believe i forgot about the 2016 clown epidemic

ep3  -mahdi is a good friend and i love him. thank u -even wearing isak’s cap until he chucks it at him sjksfjsdjsd -how much yall wanna bet isak’s been listening to illmatic on repeat since last friday thinking abt even (even tho meeting sonja shattered his heart a lil) [also kinda an aside but i think a lot about how isak n even bonded over rap and how some homophobic lyrics in 90s etc rap might have impacted them? or how that little detail ties into julie’s story? e.g. halftime by nas, which is on illmatic] -whats worse. even staring into isaks soul wearing a size xs see-through white t shirt or isak staring at even for five (5) seconds before chugging his beer and immediately making out w emma. OR even crashing that party before it can start “i think you guys are bonding too much” cheesy ass shjhfsdhskdf -yall act like evak didnt invent hands. did even shaking isak’s shoulder telling him his apartment is nice mean nothing to u -im convinced robyn wrote call your girlfriend for this scene specifically bc how could anything fit so perfectly by coincidence -is anything better than egging isak on- even bech naesheim (2016) -idk if yall have read the scripts but i love the sock thing so much bc its soo true to how isak thinks and it makes everything so much more interesting and !!!

ep4  -i will never get over even sending isak bad seinfeld memes -even smacking open isak’s locker. first of all whew second of all u think as soon as he got into the stairwell he lowkey cried bc ow -parallel of isak saying “it’s 2016, why are you religious?” to sana vs. emma’s “it’s 2016, get out of the closet” to isak anyone :( -”takk sanasol!!!!” thank u isak for my life -I wanted to be with you aloneeeee -even’s face when he sees the pool like we get it youre a director -how many times do i need to say even is such a dick sjkfsd “does it look like i care about my hair?” “usually but not right now” like this would only work on isak i love soulmates!! -even just.. fully choking isak out ssdhgfd got em -when the first notes of im kissing you start ooh boy -even going in for the kill kiss and isak going from huh to oooo shit and pushing his lips out at the last minute. phenomenal 

ep5 -ngl as soon as im not in love comes on my heart goes uwu bc like!!!! that song the meaNING.... them......... i jus love this scene sm like theyre in their own little bubble and they both feel so comfortable and at peace :((  -even leaving isak comics about an inside joke of theirs like yall mind if i scream -isak feeling left out from the conversation and his friends whew i felt that... and having them talk about how gross it is to makeout with a girl w facial hair?? blease :( -taking stock of isak’s nicknames: issy k, isabell, izzy, baby jesus, -im not even gonna bother trying to articulate thoughts on Pause bc it’s a literal masterpiece. thank u tarjei henrik and julie for inventing television with this one  -MAGNUS SDFKJSDFJKDSHK "oooh my name is Jonas and I love idealism and reading klassekampen and I don’t like plastic and I skate on a skateboard made of sustainable wood and wear old clothes because new clothes are bad for the environment and I only drink recycled water” screAMMM -what i said abt pause also applies to pride ugh its such a powerful scene and!! the beginning of kicks to isaks stomach. honestly what i fucking love about this episode is how it goes from hell yea best day w even ever to crying in the street within one week (s3 had the best balance of angst and payoff thanks) -even’s Soft Party Flannel... forever tainted by this scene rip -not knowing why even kissed sonja keeps me up at night -speaking of. how used and stupid isak must’ve felt when he saw even completely unbothered, hooking up w his ex at this party?? whew :( -bros is one of my all time favourite clips solely bc of the music?? lift me up gives me chills and when hold my liquor starts i LOSE it -ep5 and 6 remind me of that quote “to see what your characters are really made of you have to break them” because julie rlly goes all in and god it hurts so good

ep6 -never have i ever seen insomnia portrayed as accurately as tarjei did here and i remember when i first watched the cantina scene i was like. winded bc its SO true to sleep deprivation whew -i really like that isak wasnt together with even when he reached out for help and came out to jonas. bc it was him, on his own, being strong enough to talk to his friends and then eventually he was confident and secure enough in himself to be in a good place when even started reaching back out!! -i have no idea what its like to come out to someone, to be afraid of your friends rejecting you, everything isak went through. but tarjei’s acting of when, like, you have something you KNOW you have to tell someone, and youve put yourself in the position where youre going to have to tell them, but youre terrified and eventually just force yourself SAY the words??  -and isak’s smile when he realizes jonas is gonna be his bro no matter what :’)))

ep7 -weirdly one of my favourite isak looks (black t-shirt grey snapback c-c-c-combo) -”what’s your name again?” have i mentioned i love sana and isak bc i love sana and isak -jonas truly is the best friend oh man. perceptive, thoughtful, loving, laidback, a friggen BRO. tbh i was wary of him in s1 and thought he didn’t treat eva well (tho I recognized he loved her a lot, he was just bad at being a boyfriend) but jonas in s3?? just goes to show how powerful your perspective of someone can change viewing them in a different role!! because while jonas was a crappy bf, he literally is SUCH an incredible friend and his actions and words and just! him! in s3 completely redeemed any illwill I had towards him :’) -maybe im a little gay (up there with other s3 comedy classics such as “thats a boys name”) -mahdi season WHEN ugh a legend -’when someone asks isak if hes going to a family party’ literally what other reason for living do i have if not to read the boy squad text convos -isaks locker finally opening and his smile at evens drawing whewwwwwww!! also even rlly is that guy who wont text you back but will leave hand written love letters in ur locker -also. another stellar look from valtersen -slutt a meld meg is a whole masterpiece like what other piece of media has the RANGE -eskild: play hard to get. jonas: no smiley!!! isak: nah fam im good B)

ep8 -this episode is BEAUTIFUL bc you feel practically euphoric?? like hell yeah theyre finally together!! isak is out and accepted and even is done with sonja! but theres also this unsettling undercurrent of worry bc you know deep down something isnt right? why is sonja calling isak? why is even acting kinda strange? whats going on? yknow?? -literally never going to get over 5 fine frokner :~) even is such a goddamn nerd and he’s the man of isak’s dreams can u believe!!  -sana’s little speech is SO important in so many ways ooo i love her so much -also have we discussed eskild making evak do a photoshoot for him. highkey those are my favourite pictures of ALL time u can tell even was like hm strange but im down while isak was more omg guys stop🙄 omg haha eskild i cant believe youre making me cuddle with even for a photo🙄 i cant believe ur making me snuggle this dude for a pic!!!! definitely would not have done this otherwise!!! -magnus only realizing it’s THAT even after seeing how isak looks at him. whew -isak is so brave i rlly love that kid! his text to his mamma <3 -no r*make will EVER nail text conversations like mari/julie did w evak’s this week thanks for coming to my ted talk. i'd quote the best ones but it would literally double the length of this post (ok ill cave. “hahaha shut up❤️” GETS me) -you dont know whats in store but you know what youre here for. hallo -isak running around oslo with even’s clothes looking for him :( his heart is so big he cares about even so so much -when Part II (on the run) comes on in the credits its like a kick in the teeth honestly

ep9 -ive already screamed enough about cherry wine but god it fucks me up -cannot put into words how much I love eskild and how good of a person he is, he just has so much love in his heart  -”wait they have waffles here? see ya” -this convo is why i love skam so much!!!! magnus giving insight and good thoughtful advice to isak was such a brilliant move by julie (also truLy heartwarming) bc like. magnus is a flawed layered character! he’s dumb and ignorant and not very careful with his words BUT hes also such a sweet guy. i genuinely dont think he would hurt a fly and him talking about vilde (in ep10) is ;-; bc he really likes her and respects her and wants to be a gentleman! hes so loving and just. yeah. also i wonder if isak and magnus (and vilde) ever talked about having mentally ill parents and lent on each other for support bc like....<3 [sidenote- this is why i HATE b***** like they absolutely massacred magnus’s character and magnus did not deserve that!] -det er bare slutt........ very cool of tarjei to invent acting here. also the character development makes me WEEP like at first isak lied and told his pappa it was over bc its easier to brush stuff off and say you were joking than be vulnerable especially about 1. having a boyfriend and 2. saying youve already broken up?? but then isak was like hey im done with lying about who i am bc i want my life to be REAL and he told his dad the truth even if it was hard and even if he was trying rlly hard not to cry  -isak reaching out to even<3 standing up for even<3 -o helga natt. another scene i genuinely cannot comment on bc u cant really put into any written language how magical and breathtaking and heartbreaking and powerful and brilliant this scene is. so. -jk. obvs i cant say anything intelligent enough to give this scene justice but probably the most stunning piece of television i have ever had the privilege of watching. even’s text breaks my heart every gd time (esp since we never really see this side of him before finding out he’s bipolar? his guilt, insecurity, feeling like a burden, being scared of losing everyone in his life because he thinks he’ll hurt them). the music is SO beautiful i cry real tears as soon as the strings start. also the brilliance of JUST o helga natt playing and no dialogue except for isaks one line? isak’s realization when he sees the cross. him RUNNING across oslo to go to even. the FLASHBACKS all going backwards in chronological order until them smoking on the bench. isak looking at the bench and not seeing even and u can feel his heart breaking and urs breaks too! but then he remembers the bathroom and he turns and theres even and whewwww. du er ikke alene<3

ep10 -minutt for minutt is THE most healing clip im telling u. and like.. seeing even depressed really is hard and as someone who was very very depressed for 4-ish yrs of their life it rlly hits me? like when youre in an especially bad funk and you cant get out of bed and youre just numb and exhausted and feel so shitty and u want to be alone but you really dont???? could go on but literally i owe henrik holm my life for his portrayal of even  -not to be a soft bitch on main but when isak tucks the blanket over even and it keeps getting pulled off his back so isak just. covers that spot with himself? -i do love that call between sonja and isak bc once again! a flawed (realistic) human being -and isak thinking its his fault even is depressed? it means a lot that sonja told him its no ones fault, even is just bipolar. and i wonder if isak felt that way about his mamma as well, guilty for her being ill, and if what sonja said made him feel better about that situation too :( -lowkey random but when isak is rambling really fast and he goes “maybe we’ll get bombed tomorrow and talking about all this is a waste of time” it continually punches me in the throat bc that is /exactly/ how i ramble and think like tarjei........ pls -like eskild said. there really is so much love in isak’s little grumpy teenage body<3 -isak no longer just passively accepting life as its given to him, now he fights for him and even!!!!!  -isak is such a forgiving person and seeing him able to just accept things and move on? incredible -i remember when i first watched ep1 i was like oooo even and isak are gonna be kosegruppa partners and thats when theyll first get together, cooking food or smth!! but lmfao after episode 3? kosegruppa whomst???? also hilarious vilde thought isak of all people would willingly sign up for kosegruppa just to go to revue parties -even and linn friendship!!!! -cannot articulate how mf heartwarming it is to see even smiling and being more himself after being depressed (also thank u julie for having ups and downs coming out of his depression- its so true to life having one day when youre feeling awesome and then the next you feel awful again for no reason and its SO frustrating) -I had to stop watching passe pa meg cause it made me toooooo crazy! it would just be like: “I like seeing you laugh” and I was like: *SCREAMS* -im the fucking master of lying 😤 -literally don’t know why isak and even ragging on kosegruppa is so funny but “did you think I joined to have fun” gets me every time -I SAW YOU THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL -also even literally radiating love @ isak watching get snarky w vilde on the phone bc it reminded him of the first time he saw him! even rly is that boyfriend who thinks isak being pissy is the Best Thing he has Ever seen -halla boiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiz -literally the glo up of isak telling his friends the order in which he’d bang them -No filter! wow I love symbolism -so nice to see the girls together for a lil bit :) -the boys hyping up mags while also telling him to be respectful awwwwww -take desperate to a whole new level- Confucius  -who’s going to show isak how to properly hold a beer can -literally evak banter gets me thru the day. thank u tarjei and henrik for having phenomenal chemistry + improvisation skills + making isak and even the dumbest nerdiest boys i have ever seen -biology partner. and friend. ;-; -even literally is the biggest stoner blease -isak’s talk with eva is just sooooo<3 and not to be emo on main but every single word of the last few sentences he says hit me so gd hard because i feel the exact same way in my BONES -livet er nå 💛

final thoughts :( <3 -this season is so special. it feels like one really long oscar-worthy movie or smth?? i cant even exblain, its just magical. ALSO very dear to my heart. -julie really said you guys have seen isak sad and alone and repressed for the past two seasons so heres him falling in love with the best person in the world and coming to terms with who he is and being brave and opening up and finally being happy and living a real life -this season definitely feels different from s1/2/4 to me editing or production or music smth wise? as in, its got a lot fewer aesthetic shots and the cinematography seems a bit different if that makes any sense???? I also think this is the season most focused just on the main (i.e. not many- if any? sideplots going on) -literally will never get over the thought, love, and detail put into this season. when i say there is literally nothing i would change about it, i mean it and coming from my nitpicky ass??? means a lot lmfao. the acting, directing, music choices, symbolism...... sublime -s3′s cold rainy autumn aesthetic makes me ACHE for fall and also nostalgic for a highschool experience I never had lmao?? also. all the nighttime clips >>> -don’t know what else to say except thank u skam for my life

[flickerofcalum]

once bitten, twice shy | part two

part 1 // shoot me a message if you wanna be added to a taglist!

The worst part of it all was, despite the changes, Luke could still see all the parts of Brinley that he’d fallen in love with. The parts of her he was still in love with, if he was being honest with himself. He was more fucked than he’d previously realized.

“It was the craziest thing, bro. One minute she was throwing a drink in my face and the next thing I know, she’s got her hand down my pants and her tongue down my throat. I mean, I’m not complaining, but it was confusing as hell.”

Luke rolled his eyes from where he sat on Michael’s couch, listening to him recount the previous evening’s events to Ashton and Calum, Michael hadn’t stopped talking about hooking up with Olivia since they stumbled into his parents’ home early that morning, but thankfully, he’d mostly been too distracted to really pay close attention to his friend anyway. He was unable to stop thinking about his run-in with Brinley the night before.

When he’d decided to come home for Christmas, he’d prepared himself for the worst. He’d known immediately that she wouldn’t want to seem him and honestly, he couldn’t blame her. The two of them had been together for such a long time, had their whole lives planned out with each other, and Luke had selfishly flipped the script on her at the very last minute. He hated himself for it every day.

And god, he had missed her the entire time he’d been gone, but it felt even worse now that he’d laid eyes on her. Brinley had changed so much in their time apart – she was even more gorgeous, which he really hadn’t ever thought would be possible. Though it may have been a little creepy, he’d spent half the night watching her from across the room. He couldn’t stop picturing her long legs in the red dress, the cute way her lips curved up into a smile whenever she’d teased Calum, the delicate blush on her pale cheeks whenever someone gave her a compliment.

The worst part of it all was, despite the changes, Luke could still see all the parts of Brinley that he’d fallen in love with. The parts of her he was still in love with, if he was being honest with himself. He was more fucked than he’d previously realized.

“Earth to Luke,” Ashton’s fingers snapped in front of his face, breaking him out of his thoughts. “Are you alive in there?”

Luke blinked a few times. “Sorry. I was just…thinking.”

“About Brinley?” Calum questioned bluntly, raising a dark eyebrow at him. Luke had never really been comfortable discussing Brinley with Calum, and since their break up, he’d tried to avoid the topic all together. While the dark-haired man was one of his best friends, he knew that Calum’s history with his ex went back further than Luke’s history with either of them.

Luke chewed on his bottom lip, scratching his fingers along his stubbled jaw nervously. “I just didn’t think that seeing her again was gonna be so hard, you know?” He sighed a bit. “And she wouldn’t even look at me.”

“Well, you did abandon her right before the two of you were supposed to go off to college together, mate. Can you really blame her?” Michael pointed out, barely looking up from his phone. Luke shot him a glare. He didn’t really need a reminder of what he’d done to Brinley. It was already on his mind more than he would ever admit out loud.

Ashton reached over to pinch Michael’s thigh, eliciting a shriek from red-haired boy. “Not helping, Mike.” He looked back at Luke, his eyes soft and pitying. “She probably just needs some time.”

Luke shrugged sadly. At the party, Brinley hadn’t been able to get away from him fast enough – the chances of her changing her mind about wanting to speak to him were probably slim. He wasn’t stupid enough to think that Brinley was still in love with him. Not only was she beautiful, but she also was incredibly smart, talented, funny, and had the kindest soul out of anyone Luke had ever met. If they hadn’t already, it was only a matter of time before someone else came into her life and swept her off her feet, treated her the way she deserved to be treated. Luke was afraid that he was too late.

“She looked good, though, right? Like…she looks like she’s happy,” Luke said finally. Even if she was never his again, that was all he wanted for her.

He watched as Calum shared a look with Ashton he couldn’t quite read before he reached over to pat Luke’s thigh. “Yeah, man. She’s happy.”

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

The cold air stung his skin as he walked outside, causing him to curse under his breath. When he’d promised his mother he’d come home for the holidays, he’d forgotten how goddamn cold it got there. He didn’t have a lot of warm clothes since he lived in Los Angeles, so he wrapped himself up in one of Jack’s old winter coats. There was a gap between the sleeve and the gloves he was wearing, but it was better than nothing.

Normally, Luke avoided going outside at all costs in the winter, but after being locked up in his childhood bedroom for nearly a week, his mother forced him out of the house with a grocery list. Worst of all, he was without a car, so he had no choice but to make the small trek to the store on foot. It was only about a ten-minute walk, but the frigid weather made it feel like hours.

His cheeks and the tips of his ears were red by the time he arrived at the store. The heat was blasting, something he was grateful for when he walked inside. He grabbed a cart and furrowed his brows as he looked at his mother’s list. It occurred to him that he hadn’t been grocery shopping since he moved to Los Angeles. Most of the time, Ashton took care of that sort of thing or they ate take out. “Milk, egg whites, cereal…” he mumbled to himself underneath his breath as he wandered down the aisles, putting the items in the cart. He was pretty sure he had grabbed the wrong brand of cereal, but it was his mother’s own fault for sending him here.

He stood in front of the milk, thoughtfully looking between all the different types. His mother had been on a health kick lately, so would she want almond milk instead? Was he supposed to buy the store’s off brand version since it was cheaper? Luke had been standing there for far too long whenever he heard his name called out by a sweet little voice.

Brinley turned the corner, an exasperated look on her face as she tried to stop her little sister who was barreling towards Luke. He took in a sharp breath as he saw her. She was only in a pair of leggings and a sweatshirt, her hair thrown messily on top of her head, but she still looked as beautiful as ever to him. “Mallory, no running! You’re going to hurt yourself.”

The man grinned as he bent down to Mallory’s level, catching her when she launched herself into his arms. Luke had always had a soft spot for the younger girl, partly because she was the spitting image of her sister. He was a little amazed at how much she’d grown since he’d last seen her, a heavier weight against him than he was used to.

“There is no way you’re Mallory,” He said teasingly. “You are far too big to Mallory.”

Mallory rolled her eyes, propping a hand on her hip as she looked at him. “That’s ‘cause I grew up, dummy.”

“Mallory, be polite,” Brinley chastised. She locked eyes with Luke for a moment before she looked away with flushed cheeks.

Luke turned his attention back to the younger girl. “My apologies, Ms. All Grown Up. Who said you could grow up while I was gone, hm?”

His smile only grew as the little girl giggled, revealing her missing tooth. “I can’t help it!” She insisted, gripping Luke’s hand once he stood up.

Looking at Brinley again, he dared to speak. “It’s good to see you. It’s a shame we didn’t get to talk at the party.”

Brinley tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, looking up at him through her long eyelashes. “Oh, well… you know, Olivia kind of loses her mind when Michael’s around. I had to make sure she didn’t do anything stupid.”

“Right,” Luke said with a nod, looking back down as Mallory started tugging on his sleeve.

“Luke, Luke! I’m in a Christmas play at my school. I play an angel!” She said excitedly.

Luke grinned. “An angel, huh? How fitting,” he teased, smoothing down her hair.

Mallory rose up on her tiptoes to speak to him. “Will you come see it?”

Brinley coughed. “Mal, I’m sure Luke is really busy…”

Although he knew Brinley didn’t really want him around, he hated the idea of disappointing Mallory by saying no. “I’m actually really not that busy,” he blurted out, chewing on his lip again. “I’d love to come, Mallory. If it’s okay with your sister.”

He felt only slightly guilty as Mallory turned towards her older sister with big eyes, a small pout forming on her lips. “Can he come? Pleaseeee?”

The older girl let out a sigh, giving Luke an exasperated look. “I guess so. Can you let me talk to Luke alone for a second?”

Mallory’s smile was wide as she hugged Luke around his legs for a moment. “Bye Lukey!”

“Bye, petal,” Luke said fondly.

He bit his lip as Mallory ran back over to their nearby cart, pulling the doll she’d left inside out. He’d gotten enough lectures from Brinley to know when she was about to chastise him about something, so he prepared himself as he looked at her. “Brin, look…”

“Don’t call me that,” Brinley snapped, holding one finger up to cut his sentence off.  Her gaze felt like it was piercing right through him and he had never felt quite so vulnerable in his life. “I know we’re going to be seeing each other a lot over the next few weeks, but I want to make it clear that I’m not interested in reconciling with you. You can come to her play, and we can be civil when we’re with our friends, but I don’t want anything to do with you other than that?”

At her words, Luke felt his heart jump into his throat. While he didn’t necessarily expect her to jump back into his arms, he at least thought she’d be willing to talk things out. “Can’t you just give me a chance to explain?” He said, a bit more pleadingly than he would’ve liked. “There’s so many things I have to say to you if you’d just give me five minutes.”

Brinley let out a humorless laugh. “If you wanted to explain yourself that bad, you would’ve done it by now. You can’t just show up here after all of this time and expect me to just bend to your will and listen to you.” She insisted. “I just… I just want to forget everything that happened between us. I’m done, I’ve moved on. And I suggest you do the same.”

Luke gaped after her as she stalked back over to Mallory. He’d been on the receiving end Brinley’s anger before, but he had never experienced her being so outwardly harsh. He felt like there was a gaping hole in his chest as he watched her walk away.

As he finished up the rest of his shopping, he felt numb, like he was on autopilot. The wind blew the cold air harshly around him as he walked, but it barely affected him. He’d always known that he’d fucked things up with Brinley, but it was starting to hit him that things between them were messed up beyond repair. The girl he loved wanted nothing to do with him anymore, and it hurt.

So, when Luke got home, he quickly put away the groceries before retiring to his room to deal with his feelings the only way he knew how. He locked his door, grabbed a notebook, and started writing.

[loverofpiggies]

Hey that “Harold is Dead” AU

I’m gonna point you to a couple posts Here and Here about it because I want to give credit where credit is due, but I also wanted to write a fic about it because I had an idea, it doesn’t follow specifically how those posts are but I wanted to write how it would most likely happen so yes, this was written in one draft and copy/pasted so paragraphs are set up weird but oh well enjoy!

-------------------------

It started out as an average night. The clouds were finally clearing up from the southern storms that passed through, and the twin moons peaked out from behind the thinning clouds.

It was getting rather late, but then again, Purple always tended to work late into the night in the labs, desperately trying to test his hypothesis, a long term underlying feeling of dread, in case his funding gets pulled. He was doing fantastically of course, but. This fear always stayed there, regardless. He'd probably be funded for years to come, if things kept going his way. He also had a tendency to glance at Archaeology reports in his spare time, with a growing interest in the subject he never had before.

It would be fun to leave the city for a while, and study ruins. It would be different, but it would be interesting.

His foot splashed in a puddle as he walked down the street, lamp candles flickering in the dull moonlight. Shivering against the cooler temps, he shoved his hands in his pockets, desperate to get home so late at night-- when he heard a strange laugh in the alley in front of him.

That laugh.... it seemed so familiar.

Purple edged close to the wall... and decided to peek over. It was only now, he registered the laugh as an angry, spiteful one. As if someone was becoming increasingly frustrated, and laughed to ease their own tensions... Purple squinted in the night, as he saw a figure snap and swat at someone in front of them. “I am FINE! Get off of me already!” “B-bro, you're hurt. They hurt ya pretty bad...” “I'm fine! It doesn't goddamn matter, I still kicked their asses--” The figures grew further into focus.... a strange redheaded man that Purple did not recognize in the slightest, stood over someone sitting against the wall with extremely frazzled, light brown hair. He had a few bruises on his face, and had a hat sitting next to him, but was not touching it.

“I. I know ya won. But- it's just- getting serious. I'm... I'm worried about ya.” “Worry about someone else.” Purple finally recognized the man sitting down... as his eyes widened in disbelief-- and he couldn't help speaking out.

“Wallis?”

The man sitting, snapped to attention as he glanced to the edge of the alley, slamming to his feet before stumbling. “Who the FUCK is there!?” He snapped. He looked even worse standing. His clothes were a wreck, his hair-- and the bruises on his face-- Purple couldn't believe it, and stood dumbfounded.

It was like slow motion.... Wallis stood there, blinking in the dark, before his eyes widened in recognition in return.

“....Purple?”

The two stood silent for a moment, as the strange redheaded man glanced between them, before slowly stepping back to give them their space.

To Purple, Wallis was almost unrecognizable. Wallis was always one to get into fights, true. But- he seemed to get worse and worse as time went on. Apparently, after.... well. After. The Incident-- Wallis became more brutal- stopped taking school seriously, and went out of his way to get into trouble with anyone who'd brawl with him.

Purple only met him after The Incident, and had no idea what Wallis was like before that. But, apparently he wasn't THIS bad. All Purple remembered.... was eventually, Wallis just- dropped out of school.

Finally, Wallis spoke again.

“...go away.” He spoke dully, as he turned from Purple, leaning back against the wall. Clearly, he was hurt pretty bad, as Purple stepped forward. “I.... you look- erm- it looks like that hurts. I can help-” “They're BRUISES, you can't really do jackshit except wait.” Wallis spoke, glaring back over.

Purple sensed Wallis might be a bit humiliated, so he glanced down, yet still took a couple steps closer to his old friend. Wallis had so much potential.... one of the smartest, most talented people Purple knew. To think he'd end up like this...

“I.... it. It's been a while.” Purple spoke, staring down.... as Wallis seemed tense as ever. “....yeah.” Purple glanced over to the redheaded man, blinking as he noticed.... the person with Wallis before had disappeared. “Huh? What happened to your friend....?” “My what?” “I- I saw some redhead here with you....” “Oh. That's Hobo. He disappears when he wants. Probably thought I wanted space or something now that you're here. Goddamnit.” Wallis spoke coldly, as the two stood a few feet apart, alone now in this alleyway.

Purple didn't know what else to say.... as they were silent a while, he just responded with-

“It's supposed to go below freezing tonight. Maybe.... you can stay the night, if you want.” Purple didn't expect an actual response. Wallis had fallen out of most people's lives- even his own mother's- a few years ago. No one had known what happened to him, since. Wallis was obviously avoiding everyone. So, he wouldn't say-

“Yes.” “What?”

“I said fine. If you're not going to leave me alone. Then fine.”

- - -

Wallis sat silently on Purple's couch, as both existed in an awkward, thick silence. There was so many things Purple wanted to ask, as he took off his coat and shoes. Purple actually had to grab Wallis's hat- Wallis didn't even seem to care if he had it come with or not. What had Wallis been doing all this time? Why was he so hurt? His clothes looked old and tattered, too. How long had it been since he'd gotten a new shirt? A new pair of pants? About the only thing Wallis had going, was he seemed to keep himself well shaven- he only had a soul patch, no beard growing...

Purple couldn't help but smile. He remembered Wallis used to think beards were disgusting. Wallis always said “I'd never let one of those THINGS grow on my face!”

He was so passionate about the stupidest things. It's why Purple liked him so much.

“I just pissed some people off.” Wallis spoke, making Purple jump out of his thoughts.

“What?” “The bruises- the fight. I just pissed some assholes off- like I always do. Still won... like I always do.” Wallis's voice seemed to grow a bit duller, as he looked away from Purple- the silence threatening to take over again.

Purple wouldn't let it. “You're still starting fights?”

“Yeah.”

“I. I'm sorry to hear it.”

“No you're not.”

“I am sorry, though.”

“That's the reaction people give when they don't know what else to SAY, Purple. That's like, conversations 101. It's so easy to tell when someone has run into a conversational WALL when they apologize about an awkward subject. It's like- if you were to tell me you like your job, but there's this ONE part of your job that's super shitty, but overall you're cool- and it makes this stupid silent period, I mean, what am I supposed to say?? It's conversational suicide, you committed conversational suicide.” “I-- holy shit-” Purple couldn't help but laugh. Wallis had always been stupidly dramatic. “I think you're overthinking that, Wallis.” “I'm just saying you asked a dumb question, and an OBVIOUS one, with an obvious response, I had no choices, this was no longer a conversation because you killed it.” “Oh my god you obnoxious asshole, shut up.”

“No.” “Also technically YOU halted the conversation by outright STATING this crazy concept that you still beat people up and so don't go blaming ME.” Wallis actually seemed to cover his mouth- trying to hide a laugh. “....yeah. I- well shit I guess I did start it.” Purple smiled in response, as Wallis finally glanced over to him.

They shared a moment, before Wallis turned away again, glancing at his nails. Even his nails looked terrible. Purple thought silently to himself, before he shut his eyes.... and stepping over to sit next to Wallis.

“You used to protect me all the time, Wallis. From all those assholes who picked on me.” “Well, they didn't pick on you LONG.” Purple laughed. “Yeah, that's true. Your mom was always so angry at you.” Wallis smiled again, that smile Purple realized he missed terribly all these years. “Mom has the worst temper. She was so angry when she'd get a call that I beat up some new kid. But- shit Purple, they were being DICKS!” “Ah hahaha, yeah, they really were!” Wallis turned to face Purple, eyes burning in a rage. “SOMEONE had to teach them some human decency! Their PARENTS sure as heck WEREN'T.” “Sometimes its not the parents, sometimes the kids are just terrible.” “Oh my god we are NOT getting into another argument, I swear all we do is argue!” “Wallis I haven't seen you in years, I'm not arguing. We're just talking, you know.” Wallis sighed frustrated, as he sat back against the seat of the couch. “Whatever.” Purple just rolled his eyes. Sure, Purple missed the guy, but- goddamn he never grows up and he's so STUBBORN and it's so annoying! Old habits die hard, apparently. Purple felt like Wallis had never left. Purple stared down.... feeling himself go cold. That's right.

Wallis left.

Shutting his eyes.... Purple had to say what was on his mind.

“.....Petunia misses you.” Wallis didn't even seem to bat an eye. “So.” “....so you haven't visited your MOM in years.” “I'm aware.” Wallis spoke coldly. Purple could tell the air was thickening again. But, he had to push through.

“You've missed her birthdays.” “I know.” “You UPSET her--” “I KNOW! SHUT UP.” Wallis snapped, glancing away.

Purple grit his teeth.... years of anger finding themselves back to the surface. “Me and Seaweed have gone every year. YOU haven't. You-- you haven't talked to her- or ME-” “Leave this ALONE, Purple--” “-you haven't even talked to SEAWEED, and she was your BEST friend!” “SHUT UP PURPLE I'M SERIOUS!” “NO!” Purple snapped to his feet, as Wallis did also, both glaring coldly at each other. “Do you have ANY idea how badly you've upset them!?” Purple spoke angrily, clenching his fits. He couldn't hold back- not after everything Purple has seen. “You just DISAPPEARED! Your mother hasn't heard a word, your BEST FRIEND-- ME-- no one!! No one knows where you've been!” Wallis tried to pull away, but Purple stepped closer, upset. “Purple BACK OFF-” “They had no idea what was going on with you!! They didn't know if you were okay, or--” “Purple stop it!” “-NO! Don't you care?! Don't you care that they CRIED FOR YOU?!” Purple finally snapped, as Wallis shoved him back furiously. “It's better then them DYING FOR ME!!!”

Purple and Wallis froze in silence, as Wallis stared down, his energy seeming to drain from his face.

“....I. I don't-- want them to die for me.” Wallis mumbled, as he slowly leaned back against the wall. Wallis's hat sat near the shoes, forgotten until now.... as Purple's eyes widened, glancing to the hat.

It....

It made sense.

Wallis... didn't bother to grab his hat. It was even sort of dinged up too- like. He didn't care....

….like he didn't care what happened to it...

“....I.” Wallis trembled against the wall,as Purple turned back over to face him.

“....I don't know-- what I'm capable of, Purple.” His voice was shaking....

“I-

I killed Harold.

I killed him.... I killed my only brother.

And I don't even know how I did it.” The Incident...

“I-- I'm scared-” Wallis spoke, as he slowly sat down, holding his face, gripping his hair tightly.

“I can't do it again. T-there....

There wasn't even anything LEFT of him--

I'm too dangerous--

people around me just--

they just- get hurt....”

Purple stood above his friend, watching Wallis collapse into misery in front of him. How often.... had Wallis actually confronted this? Purple learned about it.... but never through Wallis. Wallis virtually ignored it.... Wallis did everything he could, to ignore what happened to Harold.

Purple gently knelt down to Wallis- one of his oldest friends. And-- if Purple had to be honest... his first crush.

“.....It's not your fault.” “I-it is my f-fault. My brother-- what could he have become? W-would we have gotten a-along? He'd b-be an adult now-- who would h-he be? Would he still b-be shy? W-would—” Wallis couldn't take it anymore. He broke down into sobs, as Purple pulled forward, hugging him close.

For a split second, Purple was worried Wallis would shove him back, but-- Wallis just clung to Purple, tears unending, and Purple stayed right with him. Purple stayed with Wallis, as the hours ticked by, and as the tears dried up.

Purple stayed with Wallis, as he made Wallis eat. Purple stayed with Wallis, as Wallis reminisced about his brother. As Wallis broke down again, as Wallis picked himself back up, and as Wallis fell apart once more--

Purple stayed.

And, eventually. Wallis stopped crying. Eventually, Purple convinced him to sleep- and made Wallis take Purple's own bed- regardless of Wallis's protests.

And eventually... the sun began to rise, as Purple sat in the living room, far too exhausted to even think of sleeping on his old broken couch. But as he glanced back into his bedroom-- he saw Wallis, sleeping soundly. Purple couldn't help but smile as he glanced down. It was exhausting, but. Wallis.... finally opened up about it.

And- maybe somehow... this could be the beginning of his healing. Maybe.... Wallis could learn to start forgiving himself. Purple frowned. A therapist could probably help, too.

Sighing, Purple finally laid down on the couch, staring to the ceiling, his tired eyes blinking- trying to force themselves shut.

When he woke, maybe he'd call Petunia. Maybe- he'd convince Wallis to call Petunia. Maybe.... Seaweed could come over. Maybe Purple could help turn this around.

And in his last moments of consciousness... he heard someone- anyone, say two words.

“Thank you.”

[emmelfish]

‘After woohoo, I like to celebrate with a long hike to ponder the fact that my wife being pregnant means it’ll be a while before we can have more babies.’

Pfft, keep dreaming John. Like that want about playing for tips, nice try – you have zero creativity points. Stick to wanting to praise Tabby, becoming besties with Lucy, and befriending Darren. Also if it’s so hot maybe you should take off your outerwear when you get inside?

FACK

John: What’s the best thing about gardening? Getting down and dirty with your hoes!

Jen: These interactions ALWAYS result in one of us walking away with minus points, why would you think this one would be any different? Anyway, come look at this, you’ll like this.

Jen: LOOK! He’s watching sports on TV like he’s people!

John: Oh that’s adorable! Hey speaking of sports, how is woohoo like a game of bridge?

Jen: *screams internally*

Finally, Jen gets to hang out with some intelligent lifeforms.

Jen: Alright. ‘Examine the lives of the best and the most fruitful sim and sims and ask yourself whether a tree which is supposed to grow to a proud height could do without bad weather and storms: whether misfortune and external resistance, whether any kinds of hatred, jealousy, stubbornness, mistrust, hardness, greed and violence do not belong to the favorable conditions without which any great growth even of virtue is scarcely possible?’

Tabby: Screw this.

Jen: ‘The poison from which the weaker nature perishes strengthens the strong sim – and he does not call it poison.’

John: My wife! I am so proud of you for reading to our child and furchildren and yet-to-be-born children AND getting a golden ticket to My Muse from the spiky-haired man because of your musical talent.

(Hey it’s Justin Kim again! Wonder if he’s come searching for his Hot Tub Time Machine mom.) 

Justin: I’m a child and even I know that if you jump on her like that it’s not good for your yet-to-be-born children.

Pop

Jen: The hell is this?

John: You said you wanted new clothes. 

Jen: But blue is so not my color.

John: But darling, now you match my shorts! 🎵Off to tend to my peppers I shall go...

Glitches

John: 🎵 With a broken arm, yes oh-ee-oh

Another day, another dollar simoleon...

Jen: TUCKER II! You lucrative little furball, thank you so much for pulling your weight while Mommy is carrying so much of it and thus can’t work herself, all thanks to that great big tit I’m married to.

John: What’s that?

Jen: I said is that the Greater Blue-Tit you’ve spotted there dear?

John: I think it is!

Jen: YAY I am so proud of you!

John: Me too!

John: Unff

I’m sorry, I can’t suspend my disbelief with this game any longer because Lucy IS the classmate that saw the rated R movie, and would be the one describing boobies and butts and bloody violence to the innocent child this chance card was actually meant for. So I picked Ignore, because a) no, and b) chance cards are bullshit, they have a 99.999999999999% chance of undoing all your good work in any scenario.

Oh looky who it is! Everyone’s favorite Desiderata resident. And, three nanoseconds of a chat with Jen results in Jen’s crumpled face of confusion and Natasha’s hatred thought bubble. Shame, really.

I’ve noticed the community tends to call her Nat, but all the Natashas I’ve known in my life (all two of them) go for Tash or Tasha. I’m torn. I’ll tell you what I’m NOT torn on. Her exquisite grilled cheese dress by the exquisite @strangetomato, amirite? 🧀

GO TABS!

Good: Tabby promoted Good: Smart investing Bad: Justin falling out with Lucy, probably because he was the kid the chance card was meant for and she was traumatizing him with talk of blood and boobies. I’m not gonna lose sleep over it, he’s all the way out in Viper Canyon so it wasn’t like they were gonna be besties in childhood. Maybe at college or something.

This family, I swear. They’re like the sim embodiment of Bender’s ‘impression of life at big Bri’s house’ in The Breakfast Club.

That’s if, uh, Bri’s parents constantly make sexually-charged advances toward one another. 

Meanwhile, dat text doe! Brandi Broke Hair Hour is upon us.

Jen: Sweetie I’ve found myself wearing something I wouldn’t choose even if it were the last garment on the planet and I’m scared.

Lucy: It’s okay Mom, if I’ve lost all respect for you it’s primarily because I’m on the precipice of puberty and that’s what’s supposed to happen.

John: The heck is this? I’m the Family sim here. You can’t have it both ways.

John: THAT’S more like it. Hai little bestie!

Lucy: Hai Dad! Why are all these people in our house?

John: Oh, well Brandi Broke was on a walkby so I wanted to paint a picture of what your hair will look like tomorrow so that you’re prepared. And I got one of those annoying messages about whether I’d been abducted by aliens from Darren even though I spoke to him yesterday, so I felt guilty.

Meanwhile, Jennifer stares longingly at her guitar and gets all introspective about this five-minute lack of romance in her life, exacerbated by Brandi heartfarting at Darren. That Family/Knowledge attraction, it never fails. And yet, somehow I can’t see Dustin and Dirk as stepbrothers, but we need to find Brandi someone soon as she needs to up her brood to six for that stupid LTW about marrying off multiple kids. WHAT IF UNBORN BABYBROKE ISN’T THE MARRYING KIND, Brandi, ever think of that?!

(Makes mental note to create drahmz by making Unborn Babybroke a Romance sim who constantly disappoints its mother)

Jen: Oh that DOES it. You lot might be able to sit around waiting for these babies to fall out of me but I have to DO something.

Brandi you utter utter terrible stupid moron you are PENNILESS WHY are you tipping Jen all those simoleons 😱

Lucy meanwhile stares at her father and tries to picture Brandi’s hair on his face in a vain attempt to glimpse into her near future.

And yet... are these two meant to be though? The synchronized terrible dancing and constant thoughts of one another may be a sign. That said, Dina Caliente does that with Darren too and, much as I love Darren and Dina as individuals, the thought of that is so godawfully wrong that I always have to direct sims to speak with each of them separately in an attempt to stop them autonomously eating one another’s faces whenever they always show up in the same GD welcome wagon. #StopDinarren #SaveTheDreamers #ACRYouMonster

Lucy manages to alienate yet another boy from districts afar (like does her schoolbus refuel in Viper Canyon or something?) by saying things about art or theater that offend Gallagher Newson so deeply, he launches a tirade of vitriolic mansplaining at her while she checks her nails, unfazed. Atta girl. 

Brandi: I wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school... I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy...

Best not look outside then Bran.

Tabby: Huh? Yeah? You want some o’ this? Come at me bro!

Tabby: Oh you think I can’t take you? Think again assclown, I’m a stunt double now, I eat fear FOR BREAKFAST.

And so the thrill ride begins. Lucy’s face is that unique mixture of anxiety and resignation that plainly says, ‘Well, my reign is at an end. It’s been real, friends.’

I love Tucker II, but the fact that he chooses THIS moment to act out for the first time in his life and start destroying the furniture is far from cool. Clearly he too is worried about upcoming changes in the pack hierarchy.

Stone cold Tabs meanwhile favors staying outside in the rain and having no part in any of this.

Tabby: 🎵 Hello darkness my old friend...

Urgh

IS NOOBOO TIME!

Spoiler alert: this nooboo actually ends up with blue eyes because I quit without saving to roll the pacifier a couple times, which is sad because neither nooboo has black hair now. But we’ll survive. Somehow. I just liked this snap.

When both your dog and your seconds-old nooboo are thinking about Brandi, it’s probably time for her to leave the house. But she won’t, because she’s a Family sim who subscribes to the stereotype of only caring about other people’s children. And pets.

3 days off? Pahaha. I don’t even have any hacks installed to share parental leave (I really should), and Jen was somehow still back at work the next day.

Poor Babygirl Burb (not her permanent name) isn’t getting a great start in life considering everybody’s just yelling about Babyboy Burb and not even acknowledging her. Well, except Jen, who hasn’t yet put her down. See that, Family sims?! That’s how to do it.

Case in point.

Brandi: Congrats!

John: Oh yeah, the nooboos? Great aren’t they. I’m sure I dropped The Boy around here somewhere.

The Boy: And my suffering beginneth...

John: The Boy! Ah, The Boy. There you are. The Boy.

(If you can’t already tell, John will be saying ‘The Boy’ in the same relieved and happy voice as the dad from 8 Simple Rules for the rest of his natural life, primarily because both of his daughters are genetically engineered to make his hair grey.)

Hey Brandi, ever feel like you’re intruding on an intimate family moment?

Brandi: Nup!

Lucy: I just can’t picture it ON me...

Brandi: Kid, what is it with you and my hair?

John: I’VE LOST THE BOY AGAIN

Lucy: Haha, my parents can be so incompetent sometimes.

Lucy: Actually... where are my parents?

Well Lucy, get ready to upscale that judgment of incompetence because...

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. John’s face. John’s face right there. Is the most smackable face I’ve ever seen.

Not only did Jennifer Burb give birth TO TWINS less than five minutes ago...

... but they unceremoniously dumped both twins in the Bouncinators, and they’re now screaming.

To which, their creators remain oblivious. There are some pretty terrible parents out there in the Sims universe BUT THESE TWO ARE HOT ON THEIR HEELS right now.

Hey, while these poor minutes-old creatures are stuck screaming in their Bouncinators while John presumably tries to create more problems for the family with his testicles, why don’t we meet them?

This is not at all named solely to give Alexander Goth a younger wife one day Cecilia! You can’t see them here because they’re squeezed shut in agony and anguish, but her eyes are deep blue, presumably from her grandfather Jeff Pleasant. Perhaps upon looking at her, her uncle Daniel will be overcome with the guilt referenced in his bio and try to send her to Mars.

And here’s Patrick! With his skintone plus the brown eyes and brown hair, he’s probably destined to be a John / Lucy clone, but we shall see. Let’s get one thing straight though (or should I say curly), when these anklebiters transition they are both leaping right into Jennifer Burb tousled waves territory.

Lucy: WHAT DO I DO

Don’t worry Lucy, we’ll pause this one here as it’s already been far too long a round and no doubt everyone involved is tired as hell.

Until next time!

[peachiejihoonie]

park woojin - demigod!au; hermes

when he was younger, he was a master at pick pocketing 

in middle school, he wouldn’t stand up for kid being bullied but rather go to the bully and pick pocket back the lunch money 

he wouldn’t really hand back to them, he’d just put it on their desk, underneath their pencil bag or inside it

constantly transferred schools too, which meant constant new encounters, and he hated it 

he was sick of change, he just wanted something permanent

one friend, one home, one school, one setting 

he was always alone since he just kept leaving 

so when he made it to camp half blood, he was shook 

he wasn’t used to the atmosphere but he was immediately claimed by hermes 

he was quickly engulfed by a crowd, his siblings and they were are all so jolly, happy, snarky but also welcoming 

at first he was really reserved and shy but when head counselor taehyun introduced him to everyone, he was overjoyed 

overtime he came out his shell 

he was the master mind of plastic wrapping all the chariots together

is known for being very mischievous and silly 

very bro

is the type to blame it on someone else 

works half of time cause he’s good at playing innocent

“woojin it was you wasn’t it”

“what? me? why would i ever? no way!!!”

honestly, he does it for shits and giggles and never has intentions to ever hurt or anger someone

he’s really good at hand to hand combat (aka flipping people) 

he carries around a simple celestial bronze knife but rarely uses it 

is really talented 

raps and dances he’s pretty cool my dude

the apollo cabin doesn’t really see him as all that talented though they’re to busy thinking they’re better than everyone else 

you on the other hand, were constantly getting kicked out of schools because of your “problematic” behavior

it wasn’t your fault that people always listened to whatever you said

even if you had asked to cut in lines, get a’s or to skip class, it’s their fault for listening to you

at camp half blood, you were known to be quite fiery 

it was hard for anyone to believe you were an aphrodite child honestly 

you stand for what u believe in, you’re straight forward, and you have no problem with casting permanent make up on anyone 

one time, at the dining hall, someone tried to mess with your sibling’s food by placing a magnetic force around it so the food can never sit on the plate 

you immediately flung around to the giggling hermes cabin 

and this time woojin was out of the loop he doesn’t commit such petty pranks uhm hello??

“okay who did it?” you glared at all of them, honestly this happens everyday and normally you’d ignore it but honestly it was gettin out of hand 

“WOOJIN!” a hermes cabin kid screamed 

and everyone snickered 

he’s just there with a piece of bread of his mouth, puppy dog eyes, lost, looking up you 

“huh?” 

and you glared at the one who yelled his name and you casted the permanent make up on him and everyone else who laughed got ugly outfits with neon colors 

and all the other tables are doing obnoxious ‘OOoooOOOOoooooOOOOOOOooooooOOoOOH shiTTTTTT”  

the hermes kids now think you have a bratty princess attitude

but did you care????????

no 

and the next time woojin sees you, he kinda wavers around you, and you don’t recognize him at first

as you’re setting up your weapons for capture the flag (i love ctp okay im sorry if your’e sick of it omg) he just opens his mouth 

“sorry about my brothers and sisters yesterday…” 

at first you were like ??? oooOOOOHHH 

“hahahahHAHAHA no its no probleM!!” 

are you nervous ?? is he that cute ?? is it just me omg

he’s a little flustered, mainly cause he just feels bad 

may or may not have avoided playing pranks on you or just the entire aphordite cabin tbh 

he was gonna say something again but chiron calls for the teams to shake hands and you two are on different teams 

and so you had the found the flag, but your back up was taking forever

no one was on guard though, and the flag was just out and exposed in the creek

you wanted to go for it, seriously, your blood was chasing through your veins, it was getting hard to hold your back you impulsiveness. 

and suddenly there was cheering behind you 

and when you walked out of your hiding spot, you saw woojin being thrown in the air,

your team flag in his hand 

and you were chill, i mean it wasn’t the first time you lost

but what really bugged you was when hermes cabin wouldn’t stop reminding you 

this happened almost every time you lose 

and when you’re in greek history class, they were just at and you were trying so hard not to explode 

and just when you’re about to, woojin clears his through

“hyungs, please shut the fuck up, i’m trying to read here” 

everyone is shooketh

cause he isn’t that straight forward and he’s normally a witness rather an unpstander 

after class you thank him and he just shrugs it off like no big deal 

inside he’s all squishy and warm cause aw you thanked him ?? you thank people ??? 

and you’re blushy because aw he cared ?? 

and tbh you guys stay in this weird phase for a while 

very small talk, short glances

but nothing more

it was awkward for the both of you 

it was the first time to feel this warm in the inside 

you both knew there was something more there

there’s no way you two are just friends 

ya’ll both squishes for each other 

but you’re both convinced otherwise 

all of woojin’s siblings tell him to not for fall an aphordite kid 

they tried to convince him that he was just falling for your stupid but blessed love charms and looks

“they’re all heart breakers !! don’t know you know about their little game” 

yea, your cabin loved doing this point system thing 

each time they “won” a person, a point 

and whoever got the least amount of points got the shoes of shame 

you H A T E D it 

you’re cabin was trying to explain to you that you weren’t falling for some “disgusting, annoying dumb, hermes kid”

“no way !!! you have to date one of the hot apollo kids, or the ares kids, but cMON, not a hermes kid. don’t be silly!”

and it just makes you want woojin more

he started getting bolder though 

but hes still shy 

your little talks became conversations, you glances became eye contact 

then the conversations would last through the lunches and he would even walk you to your next activity or back to the cabin 

his eyes not only lingered but he would also flash his cute little canine at you or even make silly faces when chiron is teaching 

and you were complaining about your cabin with him one day during your shared free hour together 

“i just don’t understand them at times, i really don’t think i fit in that cabin a at all” 

“well i think you do”

you’re laughing as you look over at him but he aint laughin

“i think you fit in that cabin perfectly. you’re really genuine, kind to everyone but you’re definitely not a push over. you know that the inside personality is what is important, not the outside. everyone thinks that you’re just being mean, but i think it’s because you base your attitude on personality.” 

and at first his explanation doesn’t make sense

he thought he was being weird and he freaks out 

“oh my go-god,i-uh- i ig-ignore what i just said hah ha ha hahahah” he would utter out, redfaced and looking away 

“no please explain what you mean woojin” and you place your hand on his shoulder

“i-it’s just like how your siblings are with looks! not to say that they’re aLL vain!! i-i i mean li-like if they’re ‘ugly’ they would kin-kinda isolate them ya know?? and when they’re pretty they date them. you’re kinda the same, but with per-personality.”

you’re speechless and his eyes are glued to the grass 

“y-you just share beauty in a different way, that’s all, and i like that, a lot” he chuckles as he palms his neck nervously 

“t-thanks” you mumbled out and he’s grinning to himself cause you’re so cute

and the feelings are just floating in the air 

since he’s all shy and awkward and doesn’t know what to do

“i like you too” you smiled back 

and yall slowly and slowly become more comfortable 

you like watching him pick out the food you don’t like in your pasta

honestly he’s the cutest when he eats

his checks are puffed out and you can see the way he’s chewing and he’s just fluffy omg 

and he would catch you staring and have his confused mouse face 

how could you not want to feed him at that point 

but slowly he would start getting flirtier and flirtier 

he would run up to you and wrap his arms from behind 

omg imagine his cabin is so surprised and they cannot believe he swooped an aphordite child 

“brurhruhrhruhr you hella scored omg hooow???” 

“well i mean, i just told them i liked them ?? and they happened to like me back ??” and he’s blushing, lookin down and a small grin on his face

they all watch you both in amazed 

like you guys are laughing and smiling, arms linked, walking towards the mess hall and they’re just watching all wide eyed and jaws dropped 

“that’s so unfair” they’d all pout 

he secretly enjoys them being jealous

imagine him look all aggressive and hot while playing capture the flag 

you can’t even play properly ???? how can you function ???? 

like you’re suppose to be his back up but you’re so distracted 

you’re teammates know to never put you guys in the same team/group ever again

but he doesn’t realize you’re distracted by him,

he’s all sweaty and puppy like comin to you 

“babe are you sick ?? are you tired ??? you don’t look okay ..” 

“nO woojin i’m fine hahahha!!! don’t worry !!!” awkward laughter 

“ookay..” is still slightly worried 

the next day he comes by with cookies and he’s such a nervous mess cause omg your sibling opened the door 

ya’ll exposed af, all you’re siblings are watching the gesture 

and you slam the door on their face LOL 

“woojin what are you doing ??” 

“i was just worried, and i knew you liked jinyoung’s cookies so i got some for you cause you didn’t look well yesterday” and he’s all flustered 

one hand in the pocket, the other palming the back of his neck nervously 

he’s such a pup omg help the cutie out 

but all you could do is stutter a thanks out

your siblings on the other side are just giggling

jihoon, your half brother thinks you two are disgusting 

especially cause 2park is lyfe and you don’t in 2park

but overall, he’s very sweet and loving 

he maybe shy at times even though he’s wild with his siblings 

it’s just cause you make him nervous

you guys prove stereotypes wrong and people lOVE it 

i’m so sorry this took so long lmao, thanks 4 waiting  !!! esp the anon who asked for woojin a long long time ago

[aurimeanswind]

“I Feel Like I’m Going Crazy”—Sunday Chats (3-26-17)

So, I was going to, for the third week in a row, write again about how I’m just horribly depressed and unhappy.

But I’m not going to. Not because I’m not, but because I am not a broken record. Good things happen in my life too, and even if I feel a little overwhelmingly depressed, it’s not all there is to me.

That, and as much as I appreciate all the texts and DMs reaching out after I post one of these things, I just can’t right now. Long day, long days ahead, and too much I need to focus on.

Thank you all, let’s talk about good things.

I Finished Zelda

I mean, there really isn’t much to this. I beat that Zelda game. I think my final time was around or close to 105-115 hours. It’s hard to tell on Switch, since it only gives you an idea of your time played, so I kind of had to track it in my head. It’s honestly incredible that all that time passed with such ease. Tales of Berseria, a game that I LOVED that came out this year took me 64-ish hours, and it felt like much longer. Zelda took me more time, and felt like much shorter.

I know the phrase of “it’s an easy 10″ has been thrown around a lot, and sure, yeah, but there is no easy 10. It’s a masterpiece, and when I review it, I’ll probably give it a 10 on our scale, but it’s not flawless. No game is without its flaws, but what Zelda sets out to do, and what it accomplishes along the way is something wholly unique that I have never actually see a video game do before. Ever.

And also that’s subjective. What that game did for me and for the way I look at and experience games is very much unique to my perspective. Other people I’m sure don’t like it as much as me, but for me, Breath of the Wild is probably the second best video game I have ever played. Second literally only to Person 4 Golden. And it’s close, which I never ever imagined I’d say ever in my life. But that’s also part of what’s so exciting. Games are changing and evolving and Zelda is a clear resultant of that. It’s a new benchmark and I can’t wait to see what people do from here out.

Whatever it is, it’s gonna be exciting as all hell.

Case Study Update

For folks who don’t know, I’ve been working on a new format of my video show called Alex Talks. It’s called Case Study.

It’s been a weird up and down with this show, and since my drive and passion had all but fallen away for doing video content, I had to find a way to bring that passion back. I decided to write a new first episode of this show that I am more passionate about. I wrote it on Persona 4.

It’s not good enough to encapsulate the feelings I have for that game. Nowhere near good enough, but the conclusion specifically really meant something to me. It was genuinely impossible for me to finish my cold read without it getting to me, and when I’ve written something that brings emotions out of me like that, I know I’ve done the thing write. And I say in the script that it’s impossible to really capture what the game did for me in one go at it.

I finished the script in three days, and it was over 3400 words. It’s in the editorial process right now, and I’ll probably chip away at it after I finish this, but when it’s ready I am gonna try and shoot it. Aiming to do so this Wednesday. I’m trying not to put a time constraint on it, since I want to take as much time as I need with it, but hopefully I’ll have it out before Persona 5. We’ll see. No promises.

It’s gonna look different so I have to do some test shoots. And I am probably going to go back to my old webcam to shoot it, and it probably won’t be on a green screen. We’ll see how it turns out.

What’s on Tap

Spectre of Torment

The only other thing besides Zelda I’ve been playing

STILL GOOD.

Zelda is really good you guys.

Questions

I used to be way into System of a Down. I know somewhere Tyler is laughing saying, out loud, “oh yeah, of course you were.” But I had this weird point in my life when I was into “metal”. I dug way into SOAD and Disturbed. And also Slip Knot? 

I mean, I was like 16 so of course. Like, what do you expect. But I stopped listening to them.

Honestly I still really like some Disturbed songs, but I’ve stopped listening to almost any and all guitar heavy music. Anything of that sound.

But the answer? I don’t know. That line never made any sense. I don’t think it had to.

Smash or Pass huh?

I waited until Nabeshin got to talk about it on the podcast, and it sounds like a hard pass. I was really fucking disappointed by Dragon Age 3, so I don’t know if I have it in me to have another Bioware series bummed down for me.

I have not, as mentioned above. I wanted to hear Nabeshin talk about it, which he did excellently on the podcast last night. It just sounds like a lot of the things I go to a Mass Effect for are absolutely not present.

And I’ve been playing nothing but SUPERB games all year, and I don’t know if I have time for a subpar one especially in a franchise that I have a very high regard to.

Seems like its a pass for now, but I may grab it on the cheap before the end of the year to at least know for myself.

Colin talks in pretty definitive sweeps, and while I don’t think he is wrong per sé, I think he himself knows that the pendulum swings all around. GiantBomb specifically living as long as it has tells me that there is still hope for all of us yet. Look at Glixel AND Waypoint, two absolutely fantastic video game websites that both sprouted up on 2016, thriving and growing. Not to mention stuff like UploadVR going big.

I think the big sites have a tough battle, trying to balance appealing to their niche, maintaining their appearance of girth, and also appealing to the largest common audience. That’s tough. All these little guys like Kinda Funny and Easy Allies and GiantBomb (none of which are strictly “little, either) have their audience that they have a relationship with and talk to. All of them are in some way subscription based. All of them do just fine.

I still think the Patreon bubble will burst at some point, but it’s going strong now, and I don’t think there is anything wrong, inherently, with that model. But the IGNs and the GameSpots might not be the same in the next few years. But I still think there are plenty of spaces to get hired into the industry and make really, really cool stuff.

But hey, everything will probably change in the next five years anyway. Think about it: when IP started, it was BEFORE streaming. We were on the ground floor with some of that stuff, and though we didn’t stick with it (when we totally should have) that just wasn’t around in 2010 when we began.

And the prize for most-creepiest Sunday Chats question goes tooooooooo

DAN JUAREZ

It’s not that easy. And I know that there was that reply to your tweet saying it is all about the money, but I just don’t think of it as strictly like that. Sure, it’s probably a big part of it. Microsoft wanted to make another Halo game, Bungie didn’t. They found someone to make a new Halo game. It probably wasn’t hard.

I think the better question we should be asking is who do we want to continue making these games? I think it really depends on who and what they’re doing it for.

I think of it in a lot of ways, but a big thing is if I were a creator in the games space, someone who had finally risen to a director, I’d want to get a crack at making a new entry in one of my favorite franchises. If the leads at 343 felt like they could tell a really cool story in the Halo universe with Master Chief, they were given the opportunity to do so, would you really ever turn that down? A big thing that gets left out of this conversation, criminally I think, is the fact that creators want to challenge themselves to surpass the work that comes before them. 

I’m a writer. I write every day. Every day I want what I write to be better than yesterday. Is it? No. So I keep writing and working every day. That’s a huge part as to why I still do this.

With that empathy in hand, I understand the need and want to make new stories, to build on what has come before, and to keep trying to iterate, even though sometimes we fail. So many amazing and talented teams went through the effort of creating not only worlds and cavalcades of lore, but mechanics, concepts, and design philosophies. Making new games not only challenges us on the story front, but also on the mechanical and design front. I don’t know personally, but I imagine that’s such an enticing and exciting idea to a developer.

I could go on and on about this, obviously, but also look at companies like Nintendo: they’ve iterated and reimagined the same concepts over and over again, and we still adore them. No two games in any of their franchises are quite the same. Except for the “New” Super Mario Bros games. And they’re a bummer. But think of all Nintendo has done with Mario alone. 

There is room to keep growing a franchise, but you need to have the right philosophy, and the right spirit behind it. But, it’s a complicated topic. Curious as to what you’re working on.

It’s probably the Lingering Will fight from Kingdom Hearts 2 Final Mix. Not only is that one of my favorite games ever, but that fight is intense and engaging in a way that only the best fights in that franchise are. And it’s hard as balls.

You can watch me attempt, and eventually beat the fight, here:

Part of what made that fight was the way it incorporated the combat mechanics of the game as a whole, and continued to challenge you to use them. It’s really fun and intense, and it totes the line of frustrating well. It never feels cheap.

On top of that, the Linger Will is this representation of the pain a character suffers through throughout an entire game in that franchise. It is the embodiment of Terra’s strength and determination. It’s a representation of the power that character stood for in his group of friends, and it’s really meaningful to that series as a whole, I think.

When you get that bit of lore and that bit of gameplay together just right, you can make something that is emotional and mechanical; that perfect serendipity.

Some of my other favorite boss fights do this too. Pretty much any and all of the bosses in Undertale, which also have the hook of being brilliant representatives of those characters. Roxas’s fight from Kingdom Hearts 2 Final Mix. Duke’s fight in Tales of Vesperia. The Sephiroth fight at the end of FF7. The list goes on.

I am drinking nothing right now. I had a lot of wine during the podcast last night so I am trying to not drink tonight.

Maybe some water?

Persona 4 is really good for this honestly. Honestly I don’t know. Maybe Breath of the Wild? Just because restarting that game and going in a different direction on a new play through would be super exciting.

Also: Tretris is great. But I get more from my games than gameplay. Sometimes emotion and gameplay can outweigh the other if they’re VERY good. For example, Breath of the Wild is so great on a gameplay level that few games can compete with it. But it’s really the balance of both that’s the best. See: Persona 4 Golden.

Tetris gets old after a while. It’s a game that’s great in short bursts though. Unpopular opinion I guess?

I have not! Should I? Jeff Gerstmann was talking it up on the Bombcast and it sounds pretty fun. I don’t know if I’m in the right mood for a weird and silly physics-y indie game right now, but is there more to that game than that? Going off everything I have heard, that’s all I’ve gleamed. But i’d give it a shot, for sure.

Too many for me to give a lick.

Wow, pressures on, huh?

I honestly don’t know. I don’t have a good answer for this. It’s gonna sound super dumb, maybe, but I go most of my days not feeling awesome, and not thinking I’m awesome, regardless of what other people think. I try and do things that I think are awesome though, and I try and challenge myself to be better and get better, and I think people are receptive to that.

I’ve also just been incredibly lucky. So, so, sooooo lucky. Being at the right place, at the right time. Talking to the right people, which has helped me leave more memorable impressions of folks, and so when I ask them to do stuff with me, them remembering who I am helps.

But bringing people together is basically impossible. I just ask, I try and be cognizant of being annoying, I try and engage with as many different people as possible, I try and be cool, I try and never get too worked up or excited to disappointed on the other end of things, and I be the best person I can be. Ask questions, dig deeper, hear the whole story.

I don’t think that’s advice, more of how I came to have so many amazing internet friends, like yourself Harold, and it’s worked for me so far.

Shoutouts

A massive shoutout to all the folks who have been super receptive to me bringing them on as guests for these next few podcasts. We are going to be short one Nabeshin for a few weeks to come, so all these great hosts who have been cool about me reaching out and inviting them on has been super great. Dustin, Cameron, Andrew, and more to be announced and revealed, all great people.

All the love to the amazing network of friends who I have gotten the opportunity to work with.

That’s it. It’s the end. I feel a little bit better, but not a lot. Staying strong. We out here.

Gonna go drink some water and get ready to podcast with Quinten Hoffman. Let’s goooooooo.