#bro is dead but he actually isn’t
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all that’s left of him
#artists on tumblr#art#digital art#ocs#original character#original art#pastel#dreamcore#bro is dead but he actually isn’t#my ocs#digital drawing#digital illustration#noah has taken over my acc it’s like third drawing of him
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nothing I read about fujimoto can surprise me anymore
#genuinely what is wrong with him#he is like actually unhinged#he ate his girlfriends dead fish#he tried to levitate on camera??#deranged#this isn’t even scratching the surface of all the weird shit he’s done#it’s just 5 am and I don’t feel like finding them#chainsaw man#csm#‘why is chainsaw man so weird!!?!?’ bro look at the author#nothing sane can come from that man putting pen to paper#fujimoto is the insane to geges evil
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⸻ ꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅʟʏ ɴᴇɪɢʜʙᴏʀ ⸻
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Pairing: Yandere Batfam x Fem Reader Part 1
Headcanon: What if Bruce find a kid with spider powers?
Notes: Reader have the same abilities as spiderman. She's 10 years old and a year younger than Dick. English is not my first language. Hope you enjoy!
You were on your way back home with a hefty diamond in hand—a steal worth more than anything you’d swiped before. Sure, it wasn’t exactly something a kid could sell at a pawn shop, but you weren’t stupid. You knew where to go, who to talk to. You weren’t scared of the shady underworld—it wasn’t anything you couldn’t handle.
That was until the Bat and his little bird found you.
“Drop it,” a deep, commanding voice called from the shadows.
You froze mid-swing, perched high on a rooftop with the bag strapped to your back. Turning your head slightly, you caught the unmistakable silhouette of Batman. Next to him, Robin—a kid about your age—stood with his hands on his hips, looking ridiculously eager.
“Oh, hell no,” you muttered under your breath before shooting a web to the nearest building and bolting.
But they were faster than you anticipated. They cut you off at every turn. You snarled and swung as fast as you could, but a Batarang snagged your web mid-flight, sending you tumbling to the ground. Before you could recover, a pair of strong hands pinned you down.
“Let me go, you big asshole!” you screamed, thrashing wildly as Bruce cuffed your hands with some high-tech restraints.
“Not happening,” he replied gruffly.
“Language,” Dick added with an almost scolding tone.
And that was how you found yourself in this position. They tied you up like some kind of psycho, ropes binding your wrists and ankles as you sat in a chair in the Batcave. You didn’t make it easy for them, twisting and spitting curses like a feral cat.
“Let me go, you freak!” you yelled, thrashing as Bruce stood over you, arms crossed. “You think this is gonna scare me?!”
Dick stepped forward, trying to defuse the situation. “Hey, uh...bro,” he said awkwardly, his boyish grin in full force. “Look, I get it. You’re upset. But this place is actually kinda cool, don’t you think? Like—wow, are those real bats up there?”
You turned your glare on him, looking him up and down with a sneer. “Wow, are you real stupid or just playin’ dumb?” you snapped. “Do I look like I wanna talk about your creepy bat zoo?”
Dick blinked, clearly not expecting your hostility. But then he grinned again, undeterred. “You’ve got powers, huh? That’s pretty awesome. Maybe we could be—”
“Shut up, Robin Hood,” you interrupted. “I wouldn’t be caught dead hangin’ with some sidekick in a green elf costume. You’re embarrassing.”
Dick’s face turned red, and he fidgeted, unsure how to respond. Meanwhile, Bruce crouched in front of you, his piercing gaze boring into yours.
“You’re very...hostile for someone so young,” he said calmly. “Why don’t you tell me who you’re working with? That diamond you stole isn’t something a kid like you can sell on your own.”
You rolled your eyes, leaning back in your chair as much as the ropes would allow. “Oh, sure, let me just spill my whole evil plan to the Bat Guy,” you drawled. “What are you gonna do, ground me?”
Bruce’s jaw tightened slightly, but he stayed calm.
Dick, meanwhile, was still fuming from your earlier insult. “You're such a bitch, you know that?” he blurted. “I was just trying to be nice!”
You raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. “Aw, poor baby. Did I hurt your little feelings? Go cry about it, Boy Blunder.”
“He’s… feisty,” Dick whispered.
“That's a girl,” Bruce corrected flatly.
Dick blinked, his face going red as he stared at you. “W-Wait, you’re a girl?!”
You rolled your eyes so hard it hurt. “Duh, dumbass.”
“I-I just thought—”
“Yeah, yeah, you thought wrong. Congrats. Now SHUT UP!”
Bruce sighed. “Robin, step back.”
“But—”
“Now.”
Dick retreated reluctantly, glancing at you with a mix of irritation and curiosity. Bruce leaned closer, his voice dropping to a dangerous tone. “Let’s try this again. Who are you working with?”
You spat on his face. “Your mom, bitch.”
That was it. Before you could blink, Bruce grabbed the ropes and hoisted you upside down, letting you dangle in mid-air.
“HEY! Put me down, you psychopath!” you yelled, kicking uselessly.
Bruce's jaw ticked. Without a word, he stormed off, leaving you hanging upside down like a piñata.
Dick stayed behind, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck. Finally, he managed, “S-So... uh... you... doing okay up there?”
“What do you think?!”
Dick winced, laughing nervously. “R-Right. Yeah. Of course. Stupid question.” He paused, glancing at the ropes holding you up, then back at your upside-down glare. “Uh, you're really a girl huh?” he stammered, cheeks red.
You stared at him, unimpressed. “Yeah...”
“Wow... That's so cool, I—I mean, uh, I know you’re a girl now! B-But before, I—I thought you were a... a guy. B-But not in a bad way! Just in a... ‘cool guy’ way! But now you’re, uh... y-you’re a cool girl!” He laughed nervously. “You’re different from other girls I’ve met, I mean, in a good way! Like, you’re cool, and, uh—”
“Please stop talking before I lose what little respect I have for you.”
“Right. Uh. Got it,” he mumbled, backing away slowly. “I’ll, uh... just... be over here if you need anything! Or, uh, don’t. That’s cool too...”
You groaned, closing your eyes. “Kill me now.”
“Y-You don’t mean that, right?” he asked nervously, his voice cracking slightly.
“Robin.”
“Y-Yeah?”
“Shut up.”
“R-Right. Shutting up now.”
The next day, Bruce returned with new information. He sat in front of you, untied this time but still under his watchful gaze.
“I know why you’re stealing,” he said simply.
You stiffened, your usual bravado faltering for a moment. “Yeah? Good for you.”
“Your mother has cancer,” he continued. “And you’re trying to take care of her and your siblings. That’s a lot for someone your age.”
Your throat tightened, and you clenched your jaw. Your blood ran cold. “You leave them out of this.”
Bruce’s expression softened ever so slightly. “Don't worry. I’m going to help them. But you have to stop stealing.”
You blinked at him, suspicious. “Help?”
“A house, medical care for your mom, clothes, food—everything you need.”
You clenched your jaw, tears threatening to spill. You wouldn’t let him see you cry. “Why would you help me?”
“Because I can.”
For once, you were speechless.
True to his word, Bruce Wayne—Batman—changed your life. He bought your family a house, new clothes, paid for your mother’s hospital bills and now you and your siblings going to school. You didn’t know how to thank him. So, you didn’t. Not right away.
One night, two years after Bruce first caught you, you climbed through his window at the Manor. He had just returned from patrol, removing his cowl when he saw you.
“The new clothes suit you,” he said, his usual gruffness tinged with something softer. “You look...lovely.”
Your face heated. You looked away, fiddling with the pink clip in your now longer hair. "Thanks," you mumbled, then, after a pause, "I… I wanted to say… thank you. For everything." You shifted uncomfortably, still not used to feeling like someone actually cared about you.
"No need," he said.
Bruce smiled, and there was something in his eyes that made your chest tighten. Then, without thinking, you blurted out, “Can I join you? In... whatever this is. I mean, you’ve helped me. So… it's only make sense if I do the same, right?”
Bruce studied you for a long moment before nodding. “We’ll see.”
And for the first time you smiled back.
Side Headcanon
𝒍𝒖𝒗-𝒍𝒐𝒄𝒌 ☆ 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒄𝒐𝒑𝒚, 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒔𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒐𝒓 𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒚 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒐𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒆𝒃𝒔𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒔.
#🕊️. dc comics#ㅤㅤ⠀ㅤ 𓇼ㅤ ㅤ𓂂ㅤㅤ ˚ㅤㅤ ◌ㅤ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ㅤ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏#yandere bruce wayne#bruce wayne x y/n#bruce wayne x you#bruce wayne x reader#bruce wayne#yandere batman x reader#batman x you#batman x reader#yandere batman#batman#batman x fem!reader#bruce wayne x fem!reader#dick grayson x female!reader#dick grayson x you#dark dick grayson#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson#yandere dick grayson#richard grayson#yandere batfam x reader#yandere batfam#dark batfamily#batfam x fem reader#batfam#batfam x reader#batfam x you#yandere x reader#yandere male
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AHHH..!
Summary: Lando panics mid-stream over his girlfriend’s scream, only to find she’s overreacting to a horror game.
Genre: humor, fluff
TW: None!
A/N: ignore the title…. English is not my first language. I hope you enjoy it though! Requests are open and welcome!
Masterlist pt.2
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Lando leaned back in his chair, his headset snug over his ears, as he focused on the intense F1 simulator race he was playing live on Twitch. Thousands of fans flooded the chat, spamming emojis and cheering him on. His tongue poked out slightly as he braked late into a sharp corner, his face scrunched in concentration.
“Alright, alright,” he muttered, glancing at the mini-map. “P1 is mine—just need to nail this next sector.”
The chat exploded with messages.
"Focus, Lando!”
“Y/N would be beating you right now!”
“Y/N is streaming too, isn’t she?”
He chuckled, shaking his head. “Yeah, I saw her go live before me. She’s probably off building another ridiculous castle in Minecraft or something. You guys know she gets way too into that stuff.”
Unbeknownst to him, you weren’t playing Minecraft. You had decided—for reasons you were already regretting—to tackle a survival horror game that was known for its relentless jump scares.
As Lando passed the final sector, his victory within reach, a blood-curdling scream pierced the air.
It wasn’t just any scream—it was your scream. High-pitched, panicked, and filled with the kind of terror usually reserved for an actual emergency.
“WHAT THE—” Lando flinched violently, his hands jerking the wheel as his car spun out. “Y/N?” His heart leapt into his throat as he ripped off his headset, his wide eyes darting toward the direction of your gaming setup in the next room.
The chat went into an immediate frenzy.
"WHAT WAS THAT!?”
“That sounded like Y/N!”
“BRO, GO CHECK ON HER!”
“SHE’S SCREAMING LIKE SHE’S BEING MURDERED OMG.”
“Hold on, hold on,” Lando muttered, fumbling to mute his mic. He shot out of his chair, his wheels spinning with a loud clatter as it hit the wall behind him. He bolted toward your room, heart pounding, as every worst-case scenario ran through his head.
Meanwhile, in your stream, chaos reigned.
“Oh my God, oh my God, NO!” you shrieked, your voice breaking slightly as your in-game character crouched in a dark hallway. You clutched your mouse tightly, your other hand hovering over the keyboard, ready to hit the escape key at any moment. “WHERE IS IT? WHY IS IT SO QUIET?!”
Your chat was absolutely loving it.
“This is why you don’t play horror games!”
“Headphone users are DEAD.”
“LMAO she’s about to quit.”
The silence in the game dragged on for a moment longer, heightening your nerves. You inched forward cautiously, your character’s flashlight flickering ominously.
And then, without warning, the grotesque creature you’d been dreading lunged at the screen with an ear-shattering roar.
“AAAAHHHHH!” you screamed again, throwing your hands into the air as your chair shot backward, slamming into the wall. Your headphones slid off your head and dangled around your neck as you scrambled to get away from the desk, heart racing.
“NOPE! I’M DONE! I’M DONE!” you yelled, your voice cracking as you practically launched yourself onto the couch in the corner of the room.
That’s when Lando burst into the room, his face pale and panicked. “Y/N?! What happened? Are you okay?”
You screamed again out of fright before you looked up at him from the couch, still clutching your chest. “Lando! Oh my God, you scared me!”
“I scared you?” He blinked, his gaze darting around the room. His eyes landed on your paused game, the horrifying creature frozen mid-attack on the screen. Slowly, his face twisted into a mix of confusion and disbelief. “Wait…was that scream because of… that?”
“YES!” you shouted, gesturing wildly toward the screen. “Look at it! It jumped out of nowhere!”
He stared at the screen again, squinting. “Are you serious? It’s just a…a thing with teeth! That’s not even scary!”
“Not scary? NOT SCARY?! It’s terrifying!” you exclaimed, still catching your breath. “I thought I was gonna die, Lando. Like, my soul left my body for a second.”
His lips twitched, and before you could say anything else, he burst out laughing. “Your soul—oh my God, Y/N. You screamed like someone broke into the house!”
“Well, it felt like someone did!” you retorted, your voice still a little shaky.
Both of your streams had caught up by now, and your respective chats were absolutely losing it.
“LMFAO HE BARGED IN LIKE A HERO!”
“Her scream broke the sound barrier.”
“Why is this the funniest thing ever?”
Lando walked over to your desk and leaned in toward your mic, grinning. “Chat, I need you to confirm—did she actually scream that loud over this thing?” He pointed at the screen dramatically. “Be honest.”
“Stop embarrassing me!” you groaned, grabbing a pillow and tossing it at him. He caught it effortlessly, smirking.
“Oh, you’re never living this down,” he teased, sitting down in your chair and swiveling toward you. “You just gave your stream—and mine, for that matter—the greatest moment of the night.”
You buried your face in your hands. “I hate you sometimes.”
“No, you don’t,” he said confidently, leaning back. “You love me. And besides, I’m your knight in shining armor. I came running when I heard you screaming for help.”
“Yeah, and then immediately started making fun of me,” you shot back, crossing your arms.
“That’s just my way of calming you down.” He shrugged innocently before turning to look at your paused game again. “Alright, let’s finish it together. I’ll keep you safe from all the big, scary monsters.”
You groaned, but a small smile crept onto your face. “Fine. But if you scream, I’m never letting you live it down.”
“Deal,” he said, smirking. “But trust me, I don’t scream.”
Fifteen minutes later, after another brutal jumpscare, Lando let out a high-pitched yell that could probably rival yours. And you? You made sure both of your streams—and all the clips—had proof.
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Thank you for reading!
Taglist: @ipushhimback, @ladyoflynx, @lewishamiltonismybf, @cmleitora, @hmma3 , @same1995, @amatswimming, @llando4norris
#lando norris#lando x reader#lando imagine#lando x you#fluff#f1#formula one#formula 1#humor#streaming#streamer!reader#funny#twitch#formula one x reader#formula 1 x reader#stream#horror#horror games
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imagine rin snitching on you to sae about your little crush on him.
“…that was 11 years ago, sae.”
“you wanna watch big bro again?” the black-haired boy groans out in annoyance. “uh-huh!” you gleam out while smiling—flashing him with your braced teeth. you’ve been asking rin that question a lot recently and it’s starting to irk him a little bit. he isn’t stupid, he can put two and two together to compose a theory about you having something a little more than friendly feelings for his sibling. however, he can’t deny the fact that he does want to see his brother play too. that’s what brings you to the neighborhood’s field to watch the muddy-red-head kick around some stupid ball. it looks like sae didn’t seem to care about the two pairs of eyes watching him—it makes you question whether he even remembers rin shouting to him 30 minutes prior. “girl, you don’t even like soccer.” he deadpans next to you with this hands shoved into his jacket’s pockets—that is a very true statement—and the fact you don’t know anything about the sport other than playing against other people to shoot a ball into a goal. you stay silent to contemplate the answer (you’re lowkey just distracted by the way sae moves are so languid). “hey, i watch you play too!” you retort, suppressing the urge to punch his shoulder. “that’s because i ask you to,” so he’s doubling down and admitting he actually forces you to watch him play? “but last time i checked, i don’t see big bro asking you.” he finishes before sticking his popsicle back into his mouth. there’s no arguing with that so you don’t respond any further.
rin is very observant—he can tell your body stiffens whenever sae comes onto your radar even just for a second. the way you stop mid-conversation to hold your breath when he asks rin (and you but you do nawt speak) what you guys want for dinner when you stay over. rin can’t contain his laughter when his brother leaves the room. “what are you laughing about?” you sound annoyed and flattened after holding your breath—he has to hold his hand up to signal you to just wait until he’s done laughing. “what the heck was that?” he says in between chuckles. you catch onto what he means by that… you aren’t as sneaky as you think you are, are you? “it wasn’t that funny!” you finally get to punch his shoulder in embarrassment after he makes it very apparent that you are quite obvious. despite the fact you haven’t ever actually vocalized to him that you like sae yet, you basically already have. but he’s like an ongoing court case—everybody is innocent until proven guilty.
it’s the way you refuse to go anywhere in the itoshi house unless you’re with rin. he thinks you’re insufferable when you have to insist there’s a ghost who doesn’t allow you to go to the kitchen to get a glass of water—good thing rin is an exorcist! he begrudgingly leads you downstairs only to lean against the wall to wait for you to finish getting your water. oh but if sae is also there? you crawl your way back up the stairs with rin following close behind you, whispering displeased questions. “you just said you were dying of thirst!” he whisper-shouts the moment he closes his bedroom door—he’s getting real annoyed of your antics. “not anymore…” you’re pathetic, making him do a lot just to become a scaredy-cat? “i’d rather not drag a dead body out of my room.” he alludes as if you were actually going to die of dehydration.
you can’t just (basically) live at the itoshi household without interacting with sae at least once. panic begins to set in your stomach when you hear shuffling from behind rin’s bedroom door—is it a robber? is it a murderer? oh no, it is much worse—it’s sae! you hear the doorknob twist and it’s too late for you to hide under the bed or maybe the closet… aw shit—he’s already standing there in all his glory with rin’s training bag. “oh, it’s you.” he says in sight of seeing a familiar figure on his younger brother’s bed. “where’s rin?” he asks and cocks an eyebrow when you don’t respond immediately. why did he have to go looking for him at the worst time? (which is all the time) “h-he’s in the bathroom…” bruh wtf goes through your head which you mentally slap in absolute cringe at your stutter. “oh okay, i’ll leave his bag here. bye.” he drops the bag on the floor before taking his leave—without closing the door! you’re too flushed to care about the gesture. when rin eventually does return to his bedroom, he’s met with the sight of an open door and his friend looking traumatized on his bed.
or that one time where you accidentally clung onto sae after getting an adrenaline rush from a horror movie rin really wanted to watch. you didn’t understand why sae insisted on sitting next to you on the couch when there was a perfectly open spot beside rin. “…and i’ll blow your house in!” a crazed man wielding an axe says before hacking the white door in-front of him the scene was the equivalent to actually being chased and you subconsciously gripped anything beside you which turned into full on hugging. “uhm…” there’s a voice beside you that brings you back to reality. you look at the direction of the voice then hesitantly look up to whatever you’re hugging. oh. my. word. you are clinging onto sae’s arm. safe to say rin was in the middle for the rest of the movie viewings.
“can you just admit it?” rin grumbled after a match with another school. “no idea what y’er talkin’ ‘bout!” you sing-song happily while extending your hand to give him the water-bottle he asked for. his movements halted, the towel on top of his head being left there to rot. he looks at you like he hates you for saying that, he snatches his water-bottle like it’s a crime for you to even be holding it. the man in-front of you is absolutely tired of your bullshit that he has tolerated for at least 3 years. “admit it right now.” he’s a lot more serious and anticipating an answer—more than any other situation he’s asked you in. “legit, no idea what you’re talking about.” there’s a lot of things you do need to admit, like how you still need to admit that you’re the one who added the vinegar in his soy sauce… “you like big bro, don’t you?” he bluntly states. “w-what makes you think that?” you stutter like the one time sae directly spoke to you. “everything.” it’s disturbing how much rin means to you that you actually finally admit your feelings.
it’s like you’re the 3rd child of the itoshi family, being at the airport to watch (the love of your life) sae depart for another country. there were tearful goodbyes which you wanted to relate to but you couldn’t because then it would out you for liking him because you never really talked to him anyway. he was exchanging goodbyes with each of his family members—his dad, then his mom, lastly rin. okay… why’s he looking over to you… “it’s okay to cry over this, i know you’ll miss me.” he winks, his stupid bangs actually looking good for once—it feels like every blood cell in your body is rushing to your cheeks and ears. “why’d he say that…” you turn to rin who is beside you after sae turned his back towards everybody for who knows how long. “i told him.” he blurts out. “RIN!!!!”
your feelings were definitely not resolved that day. you still have silent beef with rin for him outing you, you didn’t even know he snitched until he told you! the last time sae was in the country other than for u-20, he had a really bad comeback with rin—making you ice over your affections (not an effective way for getting over somebody btw).
“so?” he’s condescending. the absence of his bangs make you realize how much more grown he looks now. however, the thing that you really take note of is his eyes. sure, he’s grown more into his face but the way his eyes are half-lidded and no longer the bright annoyed ones make you really question everything.
gosh—literally every time he speaks to you, you just can’t make up the words. that ‘that was 11 years ago, sae’ was probably all your confidence for the next 11 years to come. “a lot can happen during a decade.” you push through to retort, clutching the bag that hung lazily over your shoulder. out of anywhere, he chooses to confront you like this—after a game?
“i didn’t even say it myself, that was rin!” you defend yourself, not letting yourself give into his advancements. he steps forward and you know he’s shorter than rin but fucking hell… “i changed a lot, didn’t i?” it’s a rhetorical question—he knows you can tell. it’s like he was testing the waters because when you don’t respond but you don’t react violently either, he continues, “i’m not stupid either. you don’t think i couldn’t tell?”
which event was he referring to? what if he was referring to when… oh not now. “okay, so what if it was true? that doesn’t mean i like you anymore.” you scramble around your thoughts to find words. “too bad, i still like you.”
ugh, i waited this long.
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ALSO I JUST WANNA THANK EVERYONE 🙁🙁🙁 thank you guys for 100 followers :)
#ᥫ᭡ love note#thought of this idea while doing and listening to something so unrelated#THIS WAS FUN TO WRITE#I DIDNT PROOFREAD#sae brainrot is actually getting to me#guys am i fopping😅#bllk x reader#bllk#blue lock#blue lock x reader#sae x reader#itoshi sae#itoshi sae x reader#bllk imagines#sae itoshi x reader#sae itoshi
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Joel Smallishbeans:
Submitted for: Hermitcraft, Third Life, Last Life, Double Life, Limited Life, Secret Life, Wild Life, Empires SMP Season 1, Empires SMP Season 2
Headcanons: Transmasc, he/they; Trans man, he/him; Genderfluid, any pronouns; Trans masc, it/he/she; Transmasc Genderfluid, he/any; Identity not specified, they/he
Propaganda: “He’s just a silly little terracotta man with only a vague understanding of human gender he tries to impersonate but fails at.”
“Lizzie and Joel are a t4t bi4bi couple in [the submitter’s] heart. Lizzie transfem (she/her) Joel transmasc+gender fluid (he/any).”
“Basically anywhere you see him. Just like, the constant ‘Ooh i'm so manly, the manliest, I’m so tall and strong and handsome,’ and always insisting that he’s really tall despite being super short and the way his voice will sometimes get all high and squeaky these are all very transmasc coded things. He’s one of us, okay, he’s got the vibes, trust, he’s got our humor. Every time he goes mining on Hermitcraft there is always a caption that’s like ‘straight white male mining content’ which is more of his constant need to assert how macho and manly he is and in double life he says he’s not going to get in the pool cause he’s ‘ashamed of his Minecraft body’ which is very trans behavior. He’s got that confidence he can wear a dress for mcc and still know he’s a man which is very transmasc cause other men just got handed it, but we afab men have to look at masculinity and go ‘yeah that’s me’ and then make sure everyone knows it like that’s how you know being trans isn’t a choice because men kinda suck and I still went out and actively was like um guys I’m actually a man sorry. Some days he’s cool with just throwing gender norms out the window and some days he feels the need to yell for the whole world and the next couple galaxies as well to hear that he’s DeFiNiTeLy NoT WeArInG a CoRsEt GeM. Can you tell [the submitter’s] projecting? Cause [they’re] projecting. You can pry this headcanon out of [their] cold dead hands lol.”
“He has fluctuating chest dysphoria so sometimes he doesn't bind and sometimes he does. His bad dysphoria days are rare enough that he's not gonna bother with top surgery.”
“Transmasc Joel Smallishbeans is everything to [the submitter] and [the submitter] like[s] to think that forming the bad boys is what made him plug the tv back on and turn the brightness to the max, like he went ‘Oh we’re bad boys?? Guess I’m finally a boy now!”
“Nonbinary bad boy Joel except he is not a boy.”
"First, [the submitter] think[s] she was raised as a gender that just. doesn't exist here. She was raised in Mezalea where how gender works is just. different and, because she has a beard, everyone assumed she was a man but she's NOT and in recent years has been figuring out her own identity and pronouns in a way she hasn't ever thought about before and also she and Lizzie are butch4femme, amen. Or bi4bi. Both? She’s a masculine person and she likes stuff like the bad boys because it's more of a title separate from her gender. She’s just a masculine woman, amen.”
“He's a sopping wet tanooki (cat /j) and [jizzie] are t4t bi4bi coded.”
“Joel hasn't been called girlfriend/wife/girl by his friends for NOTHING. Bro’s the definition of gender and he slays in a dress no matter what (in Minecraft and in irl)."
Joel Smallishbeans:
Submitted for: Hermitcraft, Third Life, Last Life, Double Life, Limited Life, Secret Life, Wild Life, Empires SMP Season 1, Empires SMP Season 2
Headcanons: Transmasc, he/they; Trans man, he/him; Genderfluid, any pronouns; Trans masc, it/he/she; Transmasc Genderfluid, he/any; Identity not specified, they/he
Propaganda: “He’s just a silly little terracotta man with only a vague understanding of human gender he tries to impersonate but fails at.”
“Lizzie and Joel are a t4t bi4bi couple in [the submitter’s] heart. Lizzie transfem (she/her) Joel transmasc+gender fluid (he/any).”
“Basically anywhere you see him. Just like, the constant ‘Ooh i'm so manly, the manliest, I’m so tall and strong and handsome,’ and always insisting that he’s really tall despite being super short and the way his voice will sometimes get all high and squeaky these are all very transmasc coded things. He’s one of us, okay, he’s got the vibes, trust, he’s got our humor. Every time he goes mining on Hermitcraft there is always a caption that’s like ‘straight white male mining content’ which is more of his constant need to assert how macho and manly he is and in double life he says he’s not going to get in the pool cause he’s ‘ashamed of his Minecraft body’ which is very trans behavior. He’s got that confidence he can wear a dress for mcc and still know he’s a man which is very transmasc cause other men just got handed it, but we afab men have to look at masculinity and go ‘yeah that’s me’ and then make sure everyone knows it like that’s how you know being trans isn’t a choice because men kinda suck and I still went out and actively was like um guys I’m actually a man sorry. Some days he’s cool with just throwing gender norms out the window and some days he feels the need to yell for the whole world and the next couple galaxies as well to hear that he’s DeFiNiTeLy NoT WeArInG a CoRsEt GeM. Can you tell [the submitter’s] projecting? Cause [they’re] projecting. You can pry this headcanon out of [their] cold dead hands lol.”
“He has fluctuating chest dysphoria so sometimes he doesn't bind and sometimes he does. His bad dysphoria days are rare enough that he's not gonna bother with top surgery.”
“Transmasc Joel Smallishbeans is everything to [the submitter] and [the submitter] like[s] to think that forming the bad boys is what made him plug the tv back on and turn the brightness to the max, like he went ‘Oh we’re bad boys?? Guess I’m finally a boy now!”
“Nonbinary bad boy Joel except he is not a boy.”
"First, [the submitter] think[s] she was raised as a gender that just. doesn't exist here. She was raised in Mezalea where how gender works is just. different and, because she has a beard, everyone assumed she was a man but she's NOT and in recent years has been figuring out her own identity and pronouns in a way she hasn't ever thought about before and also she and Lizzie are butch4femme, amen. Or bi4bi. Both? She’s a masculine person and she likes stuff like the bad boys because it's more of a title separate from her gender. She’s just a masculine woman, amen.”
“He's a sopping wet tanooki (cat /j) and [jizzie] are t4t bi4bi coded.”
“Joel hasn't been called girlfriend/wife/girl by his friends for NOTHING. Bro’s the definition of gender and he slays in a dress no matter what (in Minecraft and in irl)."
#transmcytshowdown#poll#joel smallishbeans#hermitcraft#life series#third life#last life#double life#limited life#secret life#wild life#empires smp#empires season one#empires season two
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Marvel Hates the Internet
So basically, pictures of C.C. start circulating around the internet. Like one person, posts a side by side comparison of an old grainy news paper photo and people eat it up and start digging up more photos and comparing them to Billy. Even the grandson of one of C.C.’s archeology buddies gets online with a higher quality photo of Billy’s dad and their grandfather where C.C.’s face is actually way clearer. And they can’t really be proven wrong as C.C.’s body is still in that cave. So, now everybody is comparing the two, but they’re also wondering things about the other Marvels. Like Mary. Is she an aged down Marylin Batson, or an aged up Mary Batson? Because if she’s Marilyn Batson, whose body is in her grave, and why is she a teenager all of a sudden? And if it’s Mary Batson, she should only be around 11 to 12 years old right now, so again, why does she look like a teenager? Not only that but she was never found and went missing, was that Marvel taking her back? And Billy, is he Captain Marvel Jr.? They look similar but not enough. And if he isn’t Billy, is Billy dead? (In this AU, he ran away from CPS at around 10) People do more digging and find out he went missing too, so now that poses same question as the one for Mary, is he with Marvel? Is he gonna one day make his debut as another Marvel? So many questions and not enough answers, because if Junior isn’t Billy, who is he? Is he just someone else? What is his connection to C.C.? Is he just some random kid?
Podcaster 1: “Is Captain Marvel a deadbeat?”
Podcaster 2: “Dude, what?”
Podcaster 1: “Think about it. He doesn’t care for those kids, dude. I’ve seen him hurl Marvel Jr. at a monster in 4K when he got mad at the kid.”
Podcaster 2: “Wait really?”
Podcaster 1: “Yeah, bro, does not! Like dude, you do know there’s a video about him telling Mary, God, I wish breaking your legs was legal?”
Podcaster 2: “Damn… He really doesn’t care about those kids…”
Podcaster 1: “And like, according to some of C.C.’s old friends, he was like a super caring guy. So, like, dude, when Captain Marvel became Captain Marvel, do you think that like did something to him and made him stop caring or something?”
(Let this be connected to the Marvel being a terrible dad post and let’s say if one of the JL listened to this podcast, they got ten times more concerned Mary and Freddy.)
or
*Marvel is walking down the hallway and passes by Hal talking to John*
Hal: “Hey, C.C..” *waves to Billy*
Marvel: “Hey, Hal!” *continues walking and then stops. Looks back to Hal and John* “Wait, what did you just call me?”
Hal: “C.C.” *smug grin* “Dude, we finally know who you are!”
Marvel: *stares at him, computing before turning around and walking away.* Nope, nope, nope, he is not going to address that.
#billy batson#captain marvel dc#dc captain marvel#shazam#fawcett#fawcett city#fawcett comics#freddy freeman#mary batson#mary bromfield
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Prey Sigil
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•───────•°•❀•°•❀•°•❀•°•───────•
Prompt: Their s/o’s family sigil is something that is prey to theirs. Characters: Robb Stark, Theon Greyjoy, Cersei Lannister, Jaime Lannister, Tyrion Lannister “You Westerosi are all the same. You sew some beast upon a scrap of silk, and suddenly you are all lions or dragons or eagles.” – Illyrio Mopatis, A Dance with Dragons, Tyrion I
•───────•°•❀•°•❀•°•❀•°•───────•
Robb Stark
Sigil: Rabbit / Hare ✿ Robb would likely find it somewhat amusing. He definitely sees the humor in the direwolf joining with the hare and would occasionally joke about it with you. ✿ He would probably give you a pet name like “my little rabbit” or something along those lines. Though, he would only call you that in private once you are more familiar with one other. He might affectionately refer to you as his rabbit to those he is close to after a while. ✿ The tone of his pet name for you would depend on your personality, but the fondness (and teasing) in it would be the same. ✿ Robb is a protective person, and he would be protective of you regardless, but especially if you’re more meek and less likely to stand up for yourself. Rabbits are often seen as symbols of innocence and vulnerability, so he would find that your house’s sigil is fitting. ✿ Now, if you’re more confident and assertive, he would be much more teasing in calling you a rabbit. He would likely add that you were his “fierce little rabbit” and say that there was a wolf in you yet. ✿ He would commission small wood carvings of a direwolf and a rabbit that you keep on your bedside table as a wedding or anniversary gift. They are not to be separated. ✿ If the two of you were to discuss having children (he does need his heir), he would refer to them as “wobbits”. ✿ On that topic, another thing that rabbits are well-known for is how quickly they reproduce (eg “fucking like rabbits”), and so he would probably joke and tease you about that in the privacy of your bedchamber. ✿ You kinda need to be a rabbit to keep up with his ass honestly. ✿ He is very eager to have “a full brood of wobbits hopping around”
Theon Greyjoy
Sigil: A ship with ten fish (Krakens are difficult okay)
✿ Bro’s got jokes (and they aren’t funny) ✿ He’s just a really handsy person in general. He likes to have his hands on you whenever he can. If he can pull you onto his lap and wrap his arms around you waist, he will. It is not a matter of if: it is absolutely a matter of when. ✿ Literally, his favorite thing is to catch your waist when you’re walking by and just pull you down onto him when you’re least expecting it. Just like a Kracken would pull a ship down into the sea. ✿ He just likes to be wrapped around you (he says he thinks he prefers it when you’re wrapped around him, but this isn’t about that). ✿ Except it is about that because most of the jokes he makes will be sexual. ✿ Before he goes down on you, he would jest about a Kraken eating (out) a ship. When he finds how wet you are, he would say that you were flooding/swamping and that it was time for him to sink (into) you. ✿ If you don’t find him funny, he might stop (maybe), but he finds himself funny and that’s all that matters. (He isn't funny). ✿ Very specific, but if you can’t swim, he would never let you hear the end of it. He would offer to teach you (since a boat should know how to float), and while a genuine effort would be made, he would also play around with you in the water, pulling you down into the water. Probably ends up almost drowning you once or twice (accidental baptism, what is dead may never die 🙏). ✿ He actually would likely enjoy being wet with you though, whether you can swim or not. Whether it’s in the hot springs in the godswood of Winterfell or just in a tub during a bath, he’d like how you look with water dripping down your body. He’d joke that you’re both in your natural habitat… mostly. ✿ Gods have mercy if he ever gets you with child because now the ship is manned and he would not shut up about it. The Kraken added life to the ship instead of taking from it.
Cersei Lannister
Sigil: Antelope
✿ She would feel slightly annoyed that an antelope is similar to a stag, but she would eventually learn to ignore it (until you do something that annoys her, then she remembers again and makes it your problem, but you shouldn’t have annoyed her, so it’s actually still your fault).
✿ But you’re not a stag, she would remind herself. An antelope is not a stag; they are prettier than a stag and more graceful. You’re not Robert. You’re not a King; you’re beneath her in every way, and she finds comfort in that.
✿ As you can guess, your relationship likely would not be the healthiest.
✿ Cersei would like to brand you as hers in some way, but she knows that she would have to do it discreetly, so she would use your own coat of arms to do it. You can expect certain gifts from her, as rewards for your services.
✿ Accessories for your hair, shaped similarly to antelope horns, rings with grooves similar to that of an antelope, and she would sneak some reds and golds into them, along with the colors of your own house.
✿ Another way she would “brand” you would be by biting you. As much as she would like to leave it somewhere visible, she is more sensible than that. Your thighs are free game though. You’d be able to tell if she’s upset with you (or in general) by whether she draws blood or not. She would tend to take certain emotions out on you. If you whimper, she would remind you that this is what you’re here for. You’re an antelope, and she is the lion.
✿ She’s also clawing the absolute hell out of the back of your neck while you’re eating her out, but it’s okay because you’ll just wear your hair in a way that hides it.
Jaime Lannister
Sigil: Striped Horse (Zebra) [Note: I don’t think Zebras are ever name-dropped in ASOIAF. Zorses are, but not Zebras. But Zorses come from Zebras and I like Zebras so we’re using Zebras ok? cool.] ✿ You will never get a chance to ask him to do anything without him saying that the striped horse should not give be giving orders to the lion (but he will still do what you asked… if he feels like it and begrudgingly. But if he thinks it would be funnier to ignore your request, you’re on your own).
✿ Big “I know the striped horse is not talking rn” energy whenever you say anything ever. Unfortunately, bullying is one of his love languages.
✿ He would be similar to Cersei in the aspect that he would want you to have some piece of him that connects you to him, thus in a way branding you, but he would also want to have a piece of you that connects him to you.
✿ He is more likely to give you something with a lion on it straight up but perhaps in your colors. He might subtly take on your colors as well with something small with plausible deniability. For example, he carried a white ribbon on him (he is a knight of the Kingsguard, so it would not be questioned) and you carry a black one on you. If he were feeling more daring, he might take the black ribbon while you keep the white. He keeps it for good luck but would openly deny doing such a thing if you mentioned it.
✿ He is a yearner (something else he denies). If he is away from you for a certain amount of time, he will begin to find ways to see you in everything. He sees horses and that makes him think of striped horses and then that makes him think of you because that’s your house’s sigil. He sees a black and white cat, and you know what else is black and white? A striped horse :(
✿ Would literally bite your ass while undressing you, but it would be more of a nip than an actual bite. If your eyes widened and you looked down at him in shock, he would just smirk and say, “What? I’m a lion.”
✿ He would enjoy pinning you down in bed and playfully taunting you while nipping at your skin. He’d like it if you ‘fought back’ just so he can pin you down again.
Tyrion Lannister
Sigil: Warthog ✿ He would find a bit of irony in the idea of him being a lion and your somehow being a warthog and he would probably make self-deprecating jokes about it, likely that he thinks it should be reversed. He thinks that you are strong and beautiful like a lion, whereas he would put his appearance something closer to a warthog. But Tyrion does hold some complicated pride in being a lion, and he would be happy to make you one as well. ✿ He would probably do something similar to Robb, having something commissioned to honor both of your houses, but it would likely be on a grander scale (might as well put that Lannister gold to good use). Instead of wood carvings, it would likely be marble figures with rubies for the lion’s eyes and a stone of your house’s colors for your warthog. He would be very happy if you liked them. ✿ At some point in the relationship, he would jest that you’re certainly the prettiest pig that he has ever seen, that is for sure… and then immediately backpedal, saying perhaps he should not liken you to a pig. If you found humor in it, he would be relieved. ✿ Tyrion would have fun with it. He’s a very knowledgeable person, so he likely has some fun facts about warthogs stored up there to bring out whenever you do something he can compare it to. You’re somewhere you’re not supposed to be? Hogging (ha) the blankets? Well, warthogs are notorious trespassers and thieves (they steal other animals’ burrows) and you are truly a testament to that. ✿ He will have most definitely make the comment that he has no desire to strip the skin from your bones, but he does wish to strip you of something before reaching for your clothing. ✿ Cersei would be quite fond of your coat of arms, even more so once it is joined with the lion. A warthog is not a boar, but they are close enough in appearance as far as she is concerned. She would commission you clothes just to see a lion and a “boar” close together whenever she sees you, and she would pass it off as a good-sisterly gift. Tyrion suspects that his sister finds glee in the prospect because of how King Robert died (he is correct).
#my friend who has never even watched game of thrones gave me this idea and i thought it was cute#it's short but that is okay#robb stark#theon greyjoy#cersei lannister#jaime lannister#tyrion lannister#game of thrones#a song of ice and fire#asoiaf#game of thrones imagines#asoiaf imagine#robb stark x reader#theon greyjoy x reader#cersei lannister x reader#jaime lannister x reader#tyrion lannister x reader#robb stark headcanons#theon greyjoy headcanons#cersei lannister headcanons#jaime lannister headcanons#tyrion lannister headcanons
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ooo i saw your pick me girl hcs from awhile back and loved them! can i request something similar for ashido/kirishima/kaminari but with the reader encountering a “nice guy” instead? thank you <33
NICE GUYS DO FINISH LAST
characters . . .
ASHIDO MINA, KIRISHIMA EIJIROU, KAMINARI DENKI, BAKUGOU KATSUKI, TODOROKI SHOUTO
notes . . .
a quick one because i was getting overwhelmed with writing this one request for my comeback 🧍♀️ (a lil sneak peek: it’s todobakudeku as ex husbands)
female! reader
MINA is actually offended that this guy thinks it’s going to work. like.. calling you short (even if you might not be), trying to compare hand sizes with you, the self deprecating humor— she’s actually going to throw up in her mouth… 🤢 though, she already clocked this guy’s tea iykwim… she has interacted with guys like him before, and she knew from the very beginning what he wanted— especially when he tried to replace her. the wicked witch and the audacity of this bitch…
“she’s not gonna pick you… if you’re really that nice, you’d stop being so sad… 😹”
if the advancements didn’t stop, she’d basically do whatever she could to make sure he knew that your ass was a fruitcake and not interested… even if it was laughable on her end.
“let’s go my scissor sister!!”
“girl??”
EIJIROU is an actual nice guy… he doesn’t need to say it for it to be known, so maybe that why he knew exactly what was going on the moment he heard this guy flap his lips… he was ashamed that this guy actually labelled himself as a “nice guy” because honestly it was even starting to confuse him like… what if he’s the one that’s not nice for thinking this way? he’s literally gaslighting himself at this point 😭
but because EIJIROU’s so nice, he’d actually pull the dude aside, speak to him from one man to another man, and tell him that he doesn’t need to do all of this because you’re just not interested (oh, and y’all are dating!!)
“hey man… i’m telling you this because i thought you’d want to know, but she’s not interested. might never be, so like… quit it, dude.”
but when the dude pretends the conversation never happened, that’s when he starts getting visibly angry… he’ll be more firm when it comes to telling him off, and he’ll get in between y’all. if you wanted to tell him off yourself, then he’d be right behind you with his arms crossed.
DENKI laughs because he thinks this isn’t a serious thing at all like… there’s no way somebody actually acts like this, right? this is all fiction. he quickly realizes that this is in fact NOT fiction, and this dude is dead serious— and this is when DENKI starts to panic. he alternates between laughing (because not even mineta is that ridiculous) and being gobsmacked at this behavior. it has him lowkey paranoid, because he wonders if he has ever acted like that towards anyone, even if he meant well.
similar to kiri, DENKI is the type to pull the guy aside and tell him what’s up. except, he’d do it so casually, the guy would probably think he’s joking. now, DENKI’s scared because the guy was trying to rope him in his shenanigans (even though he’d never resort to such tactics!!)
he’ll try to joke that being a “nice guy” is out of style (except he’s not really joking) and because this guy genuinely freaks him out, he’d just focus on creating distance between you and that dude.
“bro was gooning so hard 😭 that was not sigma 😹”
KATSUKI practically implodes, when he first sees it, but it’s such an expected reaction— the nice guy doesn’t even think twice about it. KATSUKI looks annoyed— pissed off, when this rando goes up to you and pats you on the head with his unwashed hand, but after the nice guy momentarily goes away, KATSUKI turns to you and tells you to ignore it. not because he thinks you can’t deal with the problem, nor that it isn’t worth dealing with appropriately, but because he doesn’t want you to worry about someone like him any longer. there are better things for both of y’all to worry about, and this will no longer be your problem.
KATSUKI doesn’t even give the dude the luxury of a warning, the next time he sees him and they’re ALONE?? he’s approaching him with such speed, it has the guy shaking in his boots. the nice guy literally regrets trying to be all nice to you for ulterior motives, and he makes it known— but KATSUKI doesn’t care anymore.
“i was just being nice! can’t a guy be nice anymore??”
“oh so you wanna die—”
“sheesh, okay! fine! i’ll stop. the bitch doesn’t deserve it anyway…”
“… say what.”
KATSUKI did in fact deal with it, and you never had to think twice about him again (excluding the times you laughed about it to him.)
“ngl i can’t believe he thought that’d work.”
“well he’s a fucking dumbass. focus on stretching.”
SHOUTO is so confused, because he can’t understand why anyone would actually act this way, and for ulterior motives too. he can’t understand lying about who you are to get something— especially if that somebody is you, and especially if someone just wants that attention. it’s one thing to have a crush on you, sure (he gets that because he literally does), but it’s another thing to make you uncomfortable in the process of trying to get with you.
SHOUTO looks puzzled— insulted even, when he sees this guy pat you on the head and call you short. not just because he literally touched you and made you uncomfortable, but also because he could’ve been wrong too 😭
SHOUTO wouldn’t try to hide the fact that he’s trying to get in between of you. he’s literally like a sturdy foundation, unable to be moved— even if the guy tried to push him aside (also… that’s certainly a choice..)
SHOUTO is blunt with it. he will try to correct him on your height— even if he doesn’t need to. nice guy probably already knows that you’re not actually that short, but SHOUTO needs to make things known.
“please get it right. she’s not short.” (he’d say, if you’re not)
“you’re quite wrong, she’s not that short.” (he’d say, if you are)
and he’d just watch the color drain off his face with secret satisfaction, and the room atmosphere would go awkward afterwards (but does he GAF, nope…)
“you didn’t have to annihilate him like that,” you’d tease SHOUTO later, and then sarcastically remark, “i thought he was a nice guy”
“they finish last. at least, according to a saying.”
#bnha x reader#mha x reader#bnha x y/n#bakugou x reader#bakugou katsuki x reader#bakugou katsuki x y/n#bakugou headcanons#bnha headcanons#mha headcanons#shoto x reader#todoroki x reader#bakugou x you#bakugou katsuki x you#todoroki shouto x reader#shoto headcanons#todoroki headcanons#kaminari denki x you#kaminari x reader#kaminari denki x reader#kaminari headcanons#kirishima imagines#todoroki imagines#bakugou imagines#kirishima eijirou x reader#kirishima x reader#kirishima eijirou x y/n#kirishima headcanons#ashido mina x f!reader#ashido mina x reader#ashido mina x you
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Hot take but the gerudo vai outfit was never “sexy” to me. Even back when I was 17-18 and was still looking at botw Link like 👀.
To me it looked more “cute” than anything. Especially since the young children in gerudo town wear similar-ish outfits. (yea, I get that the gerudo outfits are really poorly designed)
But in totk a lot of the outfits seem to be more blatantly suggestive. I mean holy shit, this open back is literally pointing directly to his ass
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Bro finally got to show up in a game as an adult (who isn’t dead or actually a 9 yr old trapped in a teen’s body) for the first time, and by Hylia did Nintendo let him go feral. He is serving cunt and being nonbinary and building giant flaming cock robots to his heart’s content. Good for him.
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⋆𐙚₊˚⊹ chaebol!jungkook (5 years later) ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹
series m.list //
note: YES i’ve resurrected bro from the dead. HAHAHAHA. enj !!!
//
truth be told, jin knew about the affair
he knew it before the panties incident when jungkook stormed downstairs looking for you
he knew it before jungkook bought you the car
he knew it the first time it happened
he figured it out the night of the proposal, after you said yes
it’s fucked up—he knows. but what’s more fucked up is the fact that jin never cheated on you the entire time
not with his secretary or his assistant or whoever else that worked closely with him. actually, he had a plan
he was setting up a company halfway across the world
halfway across from jungkook
it was difficult though. he did it without his parents/family connections and had to work long nights and even had to sacrifice weeks with out you. even your wedding night… which he knew, you’d go running to jungkook
but he loved you regardless and what’s a few times with jungkook for a lifetime with jin?
again, it’s fucked up.
he knows.
6 months into your marriage is when he tells you that you two will be moving away to start anew
he tells you abt the company and the new connections he’s been making,, telling you that this is your new start together
in a way, he’s telling you this is your second chance
so you take it
you and jin pack your bags, empty your penthouse, and leave everything behind
jungkook is left in the dark
no call, no text, no more contact
he only hears about jin’s new startup through the media and throws everything inside his penthouse like it’s worth nothing
then, he even managed to find a way into your penthouse. he had to see it for himself. when he did, all he saw was the empty space and the divorce papers he had gifted you 6 months ago on the kitchen island
they’re blank
you didn’t sign them. jin didn’t sign them… but they’re left here and it was obvious what and who you had chosen
it wasn’t him
was it ever him?
…
jungkook almost died from heartache
he didn’t know what to do and went through 5 therapist in 1 month
each one said (but didn’t really say) that he was fucked up
fine.
he’s fucked up.
but he loves you and he didn’t have it in him to fly to where you are or to look for you anymore
truth be told
he was tired too.
…
5 years later, jungkook and his fiancée are strolling around cornelia street
she’s looking for a wedding dress and had dragged him along
honestly? jungkook could give less of a shit
he only proposed to her because their families were in agreement and her face is decent enough for him to cum to when they fuck
she’s nice too so that’s good
but he’s miserable
it’s to the point where he isn’t even sure if he misses you anymore or if he just misses wanting to want to wake up and having a reason to
he used to wake up and live for you
now?
now he can barely breathe
now he gets up in the near the afternoon and listens to his fiancée yap about her morning pilates class, fucks her, takes a shower, and heads to work
but for some reason, as they talk together today, jungkook feels the pit of his stomach flip
then, he sees something
rather, someone
it’s…
jin
jin and a little boy, holding hands and laughing together
he rubs his eyes
yeah.
that’s jin alright
“babe, do you know them?”
jungkook clears his throat, “old friend. old competitor”
“oh.. do you want to go say hi? i can go check on the alterations. come by when you’re done, ok?”
his fiancée kisses his cheek and heads the other way
meanwhile, jungkook fights his inner demons
fuck.
what is he supposed to do? talk to jin? ask why the sudden move? because why?
because he wasn’t done fucking jin’s wife?
fuck.
it’s so stupid
but before he knows it, he’s out of breath running to jin and the little boy
“jungkook?”
he freezes
“jin… hi”
“hey! man, wow! it’s so nice to see you. how have you been?”
jungkook swallows. “i’ve been okay. it’s been a while—“
“daddy,” the little boy whines. “i need to pee!”
jungkook looks down and stares wt the kid. he has newly cut hair. his cheeks are puffy—the same kind of puffy jin has.
then, jungkook looks at his eyes..
his lips…
his nose
it’s all yours
“seojun,” jin picks him up and points at jungkook. “this is mommy’s friend. say hi”
“hi mommy’s friend”
jungkook feels dizzy
“how old is he?”
“he’s 3” jin says, voice stern leaving no room for doubts. “___ and i wanted to enjoy being married and work on our marriage before having kids.. it was needed and well… we’re really happy”
jungkook nods
okay
so the kid isn’t his…
“is she… here?”
jin shakes his head
“she’s visiting her parents. we’re giving them some time to bond since we haven’t been back in 5 years…“
“yeah it’s been a while,” jungkook sighs. “how is she doing?”
jin smiles warmly. half heartedly prepared to answer jungkook and half heartedly a little amused by his audacity
“well, she’s over the morning sickness and started waddling like a penguin so—“
“she’s what?”
“she’s pregnant with our second,” jin beams. “isn’t that right, seojun? you’re gonna be a big brother!”
seojun giggles
“little sister yay!”
jungkook swallows again
“it’s a girl?”
jin nods, “yeah. we’re over the moon. truly have everything now”
jungkook’s breath hitches
for a moment, he feels pure jealousy
jin is living the life that should be his. it feels unfair and like fucking betrayal. he feels like his heartache could burn the city down—
“are you really mommy’s friend?” seojun asks, tugging on jungkook’s hand
jungkook blinks
then, he kneels down and levels with seojun
as he looks into your son’s eyes, he can’t help but feel a tightness in his chest
this could’ve been his and yours
but as seojun smiles, jungkook sees it
he looks like jin
it’s like all your features melted away and the truth is revealed… he doesn’t look like you. he’s a carbon copy of jin, his father
for the nth time, jungkook can’t breathe
he suddenly recalls the night you two fucked on yours and jin’s bed and how you cried right after saying you guys can’t be friends
and how he felt ,, thinking that he’d wait for your love forever
but this is it
this is what he had waited for the entire time
beingf face to face with your son—your love…
he has no other choice but to surrender
he has no other choice but to accept what had happened
he has no other choice but to be happy for you
he has no other choice but to set himself free
but it still hurts
and the pain grows much deeper than ever…
this is it
the ending to you and him for real
it’s been over for years but now it feels like it’s finally truly done
jungkook doesn’t realize his eyes were teary
quickly, he sniffs and ruffles your sons hair
“yeah, buddy… we were good friends but we’re even better as strangers”
#fic: chaebol jk#bts mini#bts scenario#jk infidelity#jungkook cheating#jungkook ceo#jungkook headcanons#bts imagine
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Normal 'Izuna survives' au but he gets isekaid into canon founders era and doesn't notice for a week (everyone is convinced he's a ghost)
He literally lives in the same house as Madara but Madara acts like this is normal bc hes been hallucinating so this is clearly just another hallucination
He only realizes smthn is wrong with Tobirama sees him and immediatley goes "what the FUCK" and suddenly everyone is going "oh god you can see him too????"
Izuna is on a quest to convince people he's not a hallucination (it's a losing battle)
Realistically tho, in that era, wouldn't it be more believable that Izuna is a ghost / somehow came back to life than fucking dimension travel?
Cearly the ghost of Izuna just doesn't realize hes died (common enough in ghost lore)
Tobirama is the only one who believes Izuna bc he has the brain cells to think ab dimension travel / time and space jutsu
POV Madara starts to convince Izuna he's actually a ghost. Maybe... he did die? And he just doesn't remember?? Oh god is he a ghost??? Is he dead????
Tobirama is standing by watching this shit happen with a look of disgust on his face (I'm sorry Tobi the stupidity is genetic)
Madara really said gaslight gatekeep girlboss, starting with yourself first
@beatriceportinari :
hashirama is trying to be compassionate and get him to move on and izuna just. stays there (bc he's not a ghost)
hsrm so desolate abt it
tbrm he won't move on 😦 what if he's stuck forever 😦
SORRY IM JUST PICTURING LIKE HASHIRAMA AND MADARA DOING A FULL EXORCISM LIKE OUTFITS AND SAGE BURNING AND HITTING THE DRUMS AND ALL AS IZUNA STANDS IN THE MIDDLE OF THEM LIKE 🧍♂️
Tobirama is standing nearby watching this shit happen fully aware Izuna isn't dead but no one will listen to him so !!! Might as well watch the show
@fashionredalert :
Izuna standing there like
Tweak it slightly to turn it into a happy ending where they get to keep him bc he eventually has to go back home: there was no dimension travel, for some reason he survived or was revived (zetsu interference gone wrong?? Or right ig, for Izuna)
IT LOOKS LIKE HES WAITING PATIENTLY FOR IT TO WORK PLS
@mengfm :
He fr came back to life/survived but everyone's convinced he's a ghost and are trying to lay him back to rest
The idea of people trying to re bury him is so funny. Left and right he’s trying to avoid having funeral rights just said to him
@beatriceportinari :
PLS YESS
montage where they make him lay down in a coffin and he's just laying there fidgeting like "this feels weird is it working yet"
noooo asdfghjh he's letting them do it'
maybe i should be dead yeah' izuna!!!
@mengfm :
"No I saw you die"
"Ok convincing argument I guess" -Izuna, apparently
@fashionredalert :
I know there’s that trope about the Uchiha burning the bodies with funeral rites could you image…Bro having to run away from Madara trying to burn him alive to lay him to rest again
@mengfm :
IZUNA GET ON THE FUNERAL PYRE
ITS TIME TO BURN!!!
@fashionredalert :
Izuna running through the village with rope ties around his hands as he runs
ZUNA STOP SCREAMING AND LET THE FIRE DO ITS JOB
"IZUNA COME BACK!!"
THEY TRY TO DO IT BUT IZUNA GETS TWITCHY AS THE FLAMES DRAW CLOSER THEN JUMPS OFF THE PIRE
"NO I CHANGED MY MIND"
"THIS IS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD"
Madara is chasing Izuna through the streets with a lit torch as Izuna screams about wanting to try a different way and Madara screams about how it'll work if he just STAYS STILL
@instant-bull :
(Hashirama looks out his window and asks Tobirama if he just saw Izuna running through the streets and Tobirama tells him to stop making shit up to get out of work)
@mengfm :
JSDNJNFSDJNSDFKSNDJF HASHIRAMA THIS WON'T SAVE YOU FROM THE PAPERWORK
That’s just a lack of sleep hallucination back to work!!!
@instant-bull :
Madara trying to burn his brother alive isn’t real!
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/5cf122b719a885c8e8269750463ea5c0/c3e9b1cd172ad4fe-49/s250x250_c1/5125fd095fb512aaa3e8e65a052a7ae9cf30ab06.jpg)
"You'll get used to them" Tobirama waved his hand, the years of insomnia experience making him sound particularly knowledgable
@mengfm
Hashirama’s already moukoton scrambled brain is going to feel even more insane. This is not helping his sanity
@instant-bull
Hashirama starts to believe he sees into some alternate timeline or the past or whatever that shit was
HASHIRAMA ON HIS OWN INSANITY KICK BELIEVING HE CAN SEE INTO ALTERNATE TIMELINES
The ending is literally just Tobirama hitting everyone over the head with a rolled up newspaper and yelling that they're all stupid, going "HES alive. YOURE not hallucinating. and YOU can not see into other dimensions!"
Only sane person in Konoha
(Then in the epilogue he goes home and has his own regular hallucinations of his dead brothers)
Parts of todays AU are brought to u with the help of @instant-bull @mengfm @fashionredalert and @beatriceportinari, everyone say thank you to them
#birds fic talk#naruto#izuna uchiha#uchiha izuna#tobirama senju#senju tobirama#uchiha madara#madara uchiha#founders era#naruto founders#hashirama senju#senju hashirama
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Clone wars headcanons about everything and nothing
Ahsoka has a decent amount of allergies but only a handful are actually life-threatening and no matter how much she tells Anakin that it never stops him from treating them all the same
And by treating them all the same I mean he’s slapped some snacks out of her hands because he knew she was slightly allergic to it
In his defense the clones are really bad at keeping track of her allergies and because of that they have fed her a couple of things that were lethal to her and ever since then Anakin’s never really trusted them with food
Also in his defense Ahsoka once ate something she was highly allergic to on a dare (the poor clone didn’t know she was allergic) and all she did to remedy the situation was hand said poor clone her EpiPen before passing out
Unfortunately the clone didn’t know how to use the EpiPen so Ahsoka ended up passing out and Anakin and Rex had to rush her off to the med bay because they didn’t know how to use the EpiPen either
Because of this incident the clones weren’t allowed to give Ahsoka food and there were a couple of signs that said “blue to the sky orange to the thigh” around the ship
I feel like everyone in Clone Wars is simultaneously touch-starved and tactile which is a very fun mix especially when I think about Ahsoka and everyone else because I like to think whenever Ahsoka asks for a hug 9.5/10 she gets one
Master Plo is the most used to this cause Ahsoka’s been like this since she was a child and he’ll admit he’s spoiled her with hugs
If you were to ask her what his hugs feel like she would say they feel like childhood or that feeling you get when you smell something that you could only find in your home when you were a kid
Obi-Wan is an interesting can of worms because he’s as tactile and touch-starved as the rest of them but he’s also incredibly touch-adverse which results in him declining hugs 5/10 because he just can't fathom touching someone in that moment
But when he does give Ahsoka a hug she’ll say there’s nothing like it and she would often describe it as a breath of fresh air and very soothing on stressful days
Rex is most likely it give Ahsoka a hug bro is simply the hugger™ and she would describe his hugs as comforting if not a little awkward but grounding none the less kind of like hugging a weighted blanket just out of the drier
She doesn’t get to see Padme nearly as often as she would like which means she tries to get a hug whenever she can and Padme will never decline her hugs if anything she initiates most of them
Ahsoka doesn’t remember her mom or her hugs well but if she had to give an example of what a hug from her mom felt like she would say Padme’s
Anakin honestly isn’t comfortable with touching people he doesn’t know well but when he does feel comfortable with someone he’s clingy
Ahsoka will never admit this half cause it’s embarrassing and half because she fears it would hurt the other’s feelings but Anakin’s hugs are easily her favorite something about the all-encompassing hug makes her feel safe and secure like nothing else
But the funny thing is that sometimes he doesn’t really have the energy to hug Ahsoka so he’ll just put all of his dead weight on her which usually results in one of two reactions from her
one. Is usually her saying “Hug me like you love me” or something along those lines to which he will squeeze the everloving force out of her or two. “Hug me like a normal person” which usually gets the smartass response of “Who said I was a normal person”
So it’s pretty obvious that Anakin and Ahsoka have their bigger competitions but they’ve also got little ones like who can make the funnier face when Obi-Wan is trying to do his work which normally ends with the duo hunched over laughing and Obi-Wan finding another place to work
The: “Who can accurately make the noises Obi-Wan makes while stretching” challenge which just usually results in the clones worriedly checking in on them cause it sounds like they’re in pain
The: “Who can eat more ice cream” challenge always ends with Anakin regretting his life choices and Ahsoka doing the dishes because she feels bad
Long story short they’ve got a lot of challenges cause they’re competitive little weirdos but the funniest part is they rarely keep score of who the winner is so they’re in an endless cycle of useless competitions
Obi-Wan has slowly collected mugs for everyone he’s close with and they have a nice little home in his otherwise empty mug cupboard
Anakin and Padme have matching from Naboo because Obi-Wan took them shopping when they were pretty young
Padme can’t drink tea with them as often as she would like but when she can schedule a small tea break Anakin makes sure to smuggle all their mugs out of Obi-Wan’s kitchen
Ahsoka’s mug is possibly one of Obi-Wan's favorites it’s a good size and practical but’s also got nice intricate color-changing details because they both thought it looked cool
Cody and Obi-Wan’s mugs are pretty similar but their main difference is the childlike handwriting on the bottom of one that says “to: Obi from: Ani”
Rex doesn’t get a mug until later and it’s the most unconventional and inconvenient mug in all of creation the poor dude has to hold it from the sides because his hands don’t fit in the handle
And its design pisses Obi-Wan off every time he sees it the only thing that’s stopping him from smashing it into hundreds of little pieces is that Rex picked it so in the cupboard it stays
Sometimes the group forgets that Ahsoka isn’t human which leads to very funny circumstances
Like Rex losing a decent amount of credits trying to call Ahsoka’s “bluff” of being able to bench twice his weight
Or at the fact that Obi-Wan was once hiding from Ahsoka and Anakin because he didn’t want the duo to see the extent of his injuries from a solo mission
But he forgot that Ahsoka could smell and hear better than the average being so she was able to track him down pretty fast (she was also freaked out cause she could hear his erratic heartbeat and smell the blood so that wasn’t a pleasant experience for her)
Or the number of times when she’s eaten an unholy amount of food just for Anakin to wake up at 3 am to find her scavenging for more cause she’s still hungry
And let me tell you seeing some small hunched-over little creature with reflective eyes at that time of night would make even the chosen one screech like a banshee
#star wars#star wars clone wars#the clone wars#star wars headcanons#anakin skywalker#ahsoka tano#obi wan kenobi#padmé amidala#captain rex#snips and skyguy#disaster siblings#disaster trio#this has so much chaos#literally all of the chaos#I feel like I forget this family is comprised of strange little creatures#I love them dearly#also my sister has finally accepted that she is in fact Anakin#now all i gotta do is convince her to do Halloween costumes#One small step for man and all that bull
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Monkie kid season 5 ep 1 and 2 thoughts (SPOILERS)
DADSY ENJOYERS WE ARE FUCKING THRIVING THIS HIGH NOON
Pigsy saying he loves MK while stroking his face filled me with the highest amount of joy and whimsy that increases my life span
At the same time I love thinking about how their father/son relationship progressed cuz he literally only called MK son for the first time in S4, I’d love to understand why he never saw himself as MKs dad despite raising him
Literally hearing the eng voices again is just heaven on earth
Bro every time Mac and SWK bicker I gain years of life I fucking love it
Mac saying FFM has been his home just as long as Wukongs has me pondering a bit like did he mean that literally or did he mean he’s just been around on FFM a while after SWK established it
MK please when he said he couldn’t sleep I wanted to scream
THE FACT THEY REBUILT SWKS HOUSE I LOVE FOUND FAMILY MAN
I godda give to props to Wildbrain I can’t lie I really fuck with their animation you can tell the people who are working on the show now actually care (and it’s even more present throughout the season)
THE ENTIRE COURT EP WAS AS FUNNY AS I WANTED IT TO BE
Ten kings: we know that you scribbled your name out the book of the dead
SWK: smuggest face that screams he would do it again
I need Nezha to have a vacation he’s got daddy issues and is dealing with 3 monkeys like I’d hate to be him
The gutteral scream SWK did when they put the circlet on him I was SICK
“There isn’t anyone standing here that I don’t trust” while Mac looked up at him, what if I fucking died
“He always gets away” while showing macaque not getting away was sick
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lowk FUCKED up, butttttttttttttt would any of the comic book yanderes lobotomize their darling? we always talkin about willingness and shit saur... ya know!! just a lil off the top if ykwim
𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐂 𝐁𝐎𝐎𝐊 𝐌𝐄𝐍 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐋𝐎𝐁𝐎𝐓𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐄𝐒…
!!! GN reader, take a wild guess (lobotomies), neurological terms used, basic delusional behaviors, unethical uses of superpowers, unethical practices in general, mentions of brain dead/vegetative/mentally handicapped reader, Hal’s part briefly describes actual lobotomy procedures, Joker jumpscare in Harvey’s, gaslighting, a small history lesson here and there, themes of forced drug abuse, Tim Drake being a good candidate for the Saw franchise.
GRRRRAAAAAAAARRRRGGGHGHHHRRR. Anon, come over here so I can give you a lil forehead smooch. I’ve always wanted to write a yan lobotomy blurb, but… I didn’t really know what direction I wanted to go. Or who to write about. The idea is was legit, “hee hee, wouldn’t it be silly if there was a yandere lobotomy fic” and that’s about it. So I guess this is my chance to get some feelings out about that, yay!!
A few of these are a bit longer than usual cuz this type of shit is my jam. I also didn’t know if you wanted me to rank them on least to most likely, so shoot me a follow up ask if that’s what you wanted. Mwah!!
Bruce Wayne: Definitely not off the table. I’m willing to bet Thomas Wayne had at least one book on lobotomies; just an antique hardback that makes for an interesting read. I can see young Bruce sitting on his father’s lap in the study, tiny hands tracing over the book’s old diagrams as Thomas lovingly describes all of the morbid things they’d do to people (you know, classic father/son bonding activities). Who knew it would actually come in handy one day? Moral repercussions be damned, my man can pull off a sick lobotomy. There are of course factors he has no control over — such as your own brain plasticity and cognitive function — but that’s not exactly his fault, now is it? What your brain decides to do post-lobotomy has nothing to do with him (jokes aside, he’d be devastated if you were totally fucked up afterwards… though he’d easily adapt).
Bucky Barnes: I think he’s had enough mind-meddling of his own to give this a hard pass. It doesn’t matter how bad you are; he’s not doing anything to your brain. You’ll learn to behave on your own accord. And thank god, cuz bro would NOT make a good brain surgeon. He’d brick you so fast. Also, fun fact, the Soviets were actually the first to ban lobotomies (if memory serves correct; Google is backing me up, so… do with that what you will). I don’t know if this carries over to the KGB and their little secret evil organization side shenanigans, but yeah. Let it be known that the chances of lobotomized Bucky went down by… like… 3%.
Clark Kent: At first, I was about to say no, but then I remembered the Justice Lords from the JL cartoon, and… you know what? Maybe. It would be a very low chance, but if it’s gotten to the point where you’re a danger to yourself, Clark would have no other choice. What else can he do? Your safety always comes first and foremost. While the two dots singed into your forehead would raise a few brows, it’s not like he lets you out much anyway. He’d spend a long time trying to cope with the guilt. He did this to save you… he just had to save you from yourself. At least his heat vision is precise enough that he wouldn’t fuck it up. Now all that’s left to do is hope that you turn out okay. He’ll consider it a job well done if you can at least still smile at him.
Dick Grayson: He really isn’t that much different from Bruce, is he? Yeah, he’d do it. Maybe with a few more reservations, but he’d still do it. I think it’s in your best interest if you don’t let him spiral this far, because he’s not against the idea of you being in a completely vegetative state. Yeah, it would suck that you aren’t as active of a participant as he’d want you to be, but having complete control over your care is good enough for him. He’ll easily let his own delusions fill that void. Honestly, a part of him might even hope you turn out with a mental capacity of a toddler. It’s the best of both worlds; while you can still respond to your environment, you also rely heavily on his care. Perfectly pliable in his hands… a dream come true! Yay!
Hal Jordan: Nah. He’s good. Last he checked, he’s not the most qualified person in the world to quite literally poke around in someone’s brain. Hell, even the thought of it makes him sick. No drilling holes into skulls, no skewering needles through eye sockets, no thanks! He’ll leave that up to the people who can stomach the grosser shit. Now, is the thought of a quick operation that theoretically fixes your bratty behavior tempting? Sure. But Hal’s not an idiot; he knows the risks, and those risks just don’t seem worth it. There’s a reason lobotomies are unethical nowadays. Unless the topic comes up in some sort of show or movie, the thought wouldn’t even cross his mind.
Harvey Dent: Neither Harvey nor Two Face are all that keen on the idea. They might’ve done some fucked up shit to you (definitely Two Face more than Harvey), but a lobotomy? That’s just a new level of fucked up. A Joker level of fucked up, even (and the thought of being compared to that piece of shit makes both sides of Dent want to light up an entire room). Besides, there’s no one on the entire planet he’d trust to pull off a procedure like that on you. While he might know a guy or two who would totally do it in this day and age, he’d sooner put a bullet in their brain than let them fuck around with yours. That being said, don’t think you’re totally out of the woods. At the end of the day, it’s all up to the coin, remember?
Jaime Reyes: Would Jaime? No. Absolutely not. It’s unethical, it’s fucked, and it’s also just gross. Anything to do with surgery makes him feel extremely squeamish, and he might actually pass out if he thinks about it too hard. But would Khaji Da? Yeah. Probably. Though it would have to be an extreme scenario, where you’re just completely beyond controlling. Khaji Da knows the risks, and while he’ll execute the technical aspects flawlessly, the results are naturally unpredictable. It would be unfortunate if the scarab lost its host’s mate. Your poor little noggin is at the mercy of Jaime’s resolve. Is he in full control? Then don’t worry, his incoherent mutterings about severing connections in your prefrontal cortex are nothing but his weird intrusive thoughts. But… if he isn’t… uh-oh.
Peter Parker: Nope. No lobotomies here. He’s quite aware of the repercussions, both morally and practically. Honestly, he doesn’t even see most of your behaviors as something in need of correcting in the first place. Maybe if you were causing yourself any sort of harm, but other than that, he can put up with a lot of your bullshit. Talking back? Name calling? Hitting and kicking? Straight-up just being abusive? As long as you don’t leave him, he’ll work with it! Peter is the exact definition of a pushover yandere. You can get away with a lot, and that includes not getting lobotomy!
Reed Richards: I can see him pulling one off. Is it the most desirable outcome? Definitely not. But there’s only so much he can put up with before he finally puts his foot down. If you’re the insubordinate type, you’ve probably given him at least 17 heart attacks by now, and it’s only natural he’d come up with a way to curb those behaviors. See, me personally, if I were to get a lobotomy from any of these men, I’m calling up Reed. He’s no neurologist, but I’m sure he can whip up something to study your brain waves and accurately predict the outcome of a lobotomy. Plus, he’d probably have the safest environment and instruments for the operation. You won’t feel a thing, trust. Now let’s hope months of collecting data and trial runs on some less-than-willing test subjects pay off!
Remy LeBeau: Yeah, no… probably not. Thanks to Sinister, he knows first hand how invasive a lobotomy is. You’d have to be really unstable for him to even consider that idea. He definitely has the means to do it — all he has to do is put a finger up to your forehead and burn through your frontal lobe — but having the resolve to do it is a different story. While he might’ve turned out semi-okay post-lobotomy, there’s no telling what would happen after yours. Way too risky. Only something to consider as a totally nuclear option. So don’t make him do something he’d rather not, okay? It’d be better for you, better for him, better for everyone.
Scott Summers: Like Gambit, he’s a victim of Sinister’s fuckery but 10 times worse. I don’t think he’d be able to stomach the thought of doing anything surgical to you no matter how disobedient you are. But… maybe we can make this a little interesting. Scott’s attracted some hella weird attention over the years… who’s to say someone like Sinister wouldn’t get his hands on you and do a little fucking around? Maybe Goblin Queen? A particularly pissed off Phoenix? While Scott himself wouldn’t dare lobotomize you, I think there’s some people out there who would. Or, hear me out: mind controlled Cyclops almost crushing your skull with an optic blast. It would be more blunt force than an actual lobotomy, but I’m willing to bet it would fuck up your cognitive function all the same. Despite the immense horror and guilt he’d feel afterwards, a small part of him can see it as a blessing in disguise (depending on how you turn out, that is).
Steve Rogers: Honestly, Cap was frozen at the funniest point in history ever. The amount of lobotomies increased exponentially from the 40s to 50s (mind you, WWII ended in 1945), and then antipsychotics were introduced as a more ethical way to treat mental illness, which Steve wouldn’t know shit about. Unfortunately for all of my fellow sickos out there, lobotomies were probably never a thing Steve liked about the 40s, but allow me to offer an alternative. Steve thinks there’s clearly something wrong with your mental health; why else would you act like you hate him? Luckily for him, this is the 21st century, where people know much more about mental illnesses and disorders. He could easily pull some strings as Captain America and get you the help you so obviously need. So, I guess the question is, how many different prescriptions of antipsychotics can one take at once? Guess you’ll find out!
Tim Drake: So… uh… y’all better pray that he doesn’t get any intrusive thoughts about this shit. And if he does, PRAY that he snaps out of his weird fit before it’s too late. DO NOT LET BRO COOK. I don’t think he’d totally fuck it up or anything, but the chances of him spiraling and performing more than one are dangerously high. You might find the out hard way just how much poking and prodding a brain can take before it shuts down. Depending on how manic he is, he might actually lobotomize you while you’re conscious. No anesthesia, no painkillers, just him pouncing on you with a hammer and pick. You will be rawdogging this lobotomy like god intended. That’s when he’d fuck your shit up. Unless you want him to brick your brain, you better fight him off and wrestle those tools out of his hands. The post-manic episode clarity would be insane. “Uh… sorry I tried to give you a lobotomy.” Cool, man. Okay.
Wally West: Wally “if you need to give someone a lobotomy, that’s honestly a skill issue” West. Who needs that shit when you’re THE master manipulator? It would take some god-tier perception (or paranoia) to see through a fraction of his act, and even so, what good will any of that do when he’s got everyone else wrapped around his finger? Fighting against him is a dangerous game. If need be, he’ll play the loving caretaker while you’re the loony one. Poor Wally… he’s trying to help you through your issues, and this is the thanks he gets? Wow. Now, for the sake of a little exploration, I think it’s important to note that Wally could theoretically go through with it (by phasing his hand through your skull and solidifying at the right angle), but that sounds way too unstable to pull off. It would probably run the risk of turning your brain into a soup, and I’m pretty sure that kills people.
#❥ CALL INCOMING: DO YOU LIKE SCARY MOVIES?#❥ TW: YANDERE#❥ YANDERE CHARACTER#❥ PLATONIC YANDERE#❥ ROMANTIC YANDERE#❥ YANDERE BRUCE WAYNE#❥ YANDERE BUCKY BARNES#❥ YANDERE CLARK KENT#❥ YANDERE DICK GRAYSON#❥ YANDERE HAL JORDAN#❥ YANDERE HARVEY DENT#❥ YANDERE JAIME REYES#❥ YANDERE PETER PARKER#❥ YANDERE REED RICHARDS#❥ YANDERE REMY LEBEAU#❥ YANDERE SCOTT SUMMERS#❥ YANDERE STEVE ROGERS#❥ YANDERE TIM DRAKE#❥ YANDERE WALLY WEST#❥ YANDERE VARIOUS X READER#❥ GN READER
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Joel Smallishbeans^2:
Submitted for: Hermitcraft, Third Life, Last Life, Double Life, Limited Life, Secret Life, Wild Life, Empires SMP Season 1, Empires SMP Season 2
Headcanons: Transmasc, he/they; Trans man, he/him; Genderfluid, any pronouns; Trans masc, it/he/she; Transmasc Genderfluid, he/any; Identity not specified, they/he
Propaganda: “He’s just a silly little terracotta man with only a vague understanding of human gender he tries to impersonate but fails at.”
“Lizzie and Joel are a t4t bi4bi couple in [the submitter’s] heart. Lizzie transfem (she/her) Joel transmasc+gender fluid (he/any).”
“Basically anywhere you see him. Just like, the constant ‘Ooh i'm so manly, the manliest, I’m so tall and strong and handsome,’ and always insisting that he’s really tall despite being super short and the way his voice will sometimes get all high and squeaky these are all very transmasc coded things. He’s one of us, okay, he’s got the vibes, trust, he’s got our humor. Every time he goes mining on Hermitcraft there is always a caption that’s like ‘straight white male mining content’ which is more of his constant need to assert how macho and manly he is and in double life he says he’s not going to get in the pool cause he’s ‘ashamed of his Minecraft body’ which is very trans behavior. He’s got that confidence he can wear a dress for mcc and still know he’s a man which is very transmasc cause other men just got handed it, but we afab men have to look at masculinity and go ‘yeah that’s me’ and then make sure everyone knows it like that’s how you know being trans isn’t a choice because men kinda suck and I still went out and actively was like um guys I’m actually a man sorry. Some days he’s cool with just throwing gender norms out the window and some days he feels the need to yell for the whole world and the next couple galaxies as well to hear that he’s DeFiNiTeLy NoT WeArInG a CoRsEt GeM. Can you tell [the submitter’s] projecting? Cause [they’re] projecting. You can pry this headcanon out of [their] cold dead hands lol.”
“He has fluctuating chest dysphoria so sometimes he doesn't bind and sometimes he does. His bad dysphoria days are rare enough that he's not gonna bother with top surgery.”
“Transmasc Joel Smallishbeans is everything to [the submitter] and [the submitter] like[s] to think that forming the bad boys is what made him plug the tv back on and turn the brightness to the max, like he went ‘Oh we’re bad boys?? Guess I’m finally a boy now!”
“Nonbinary bad boy Joel except he is not a boy.”
"First, [the submitter] think[s] she was raised as a gender that just. doesn't exist here. She was raised in Mezalea where how gender works is just. different and, because she has a beard, everyone assumed she was a man but she's NOT and in recent years has been figuring out her own identity and pronouns in a way she hasn't ever thought about before and also she and Lizzie are butch4femme, amen. Or bi4bi. Both? She’s a masculine person and she likes stuff like the bad boys because it's more of a title separate from her gender. She’s just a masculine woman, amen.”
“He's a sopping wet tanooki (cat /j) and [jizzie] are t4t bi4bi coded.”
“Joel hasn't been called girlfriend/wife/girl by his friends for NOTHING. Bro’s the definition of gender and he slays in a dress no matter what (in Minecraft and in irl)."
Joel Smallishbeans^2:
Submitted for: Hermitcraft, Third Life, Last Life, Double Life, Limited Life, Secret Life, Wild Life, Empires SMP Season 1, Empires SMP Season 2
Headcanons: Transmasc, he/they; Trans man, he/him; Genderfluid, any pronouns; Trans masc, it/he/she; Transmasc Genderfluid, he/any; Identity not specified, they/he
Propaganda: “He’s just a silly little terracotta man with only a vague understanding of human gender he tries to impersonate but fails at.”
“Lizzie and Joel are a t4t bi4bi couple in [the submitter’s] heart. Lizzie transfem (she/her) Joel transmasc+gender fluid (he/any).”
“Basically anywhere you see him. Just like, the constant ‘Ooh i'm so manly, the manliest, I’m so tall and strong and handsome,’ and always insisting that he’s really tall despite being super short and the way his voice will sometimes get all high and squeaky these are all very transmasc coded things. He’s one of us, okay, he’s got the vibes, trust, he’s got our humor. Every time he goes mining on Hermitcraft there is always a caption that’s like ‘straight white male mining content’ which is more of his constant need to assert how macho and manly he is and in double life he says he’s not going to get in the pool cause he’s ‘ashamed of his Minecraft body’ which is very trans behavior. He’s got that confidence he can wear a dress for mcc and still know he’s a man which is very transmasc cause other men just got handed it, but we afab men have to look at masculinity and go ‘yeah that’s me’ and then make sure everyone knows it like that’s how you know being trans isn’t a choice because men kinda suck and I still went out and actively was like um guys I’m actually a man sorry. Some days he’s cool with just throwing gender norms out the window and some days he feels the need to yell for the whole world and the next couple galaxies as well to hear that he’s DeFiNiTeLy NoT WeArInG a CoRsEt GeM. Can you tell [the submitter’s] projecting? Cause [they’re] projecting. You can pry this headcanon out of [their] cold dead hands lol.”
“He has fluctuating chest dysphoria so sometimes he doesn't bind and sometimes he does. His bad dysphoria days are rare enough that he's not gonna bother with top surgery.”
“Transmasc Joel Smallishbeans is everything to [the submitter] and [the submitter] like[s] to think that forming the bad boys is what made him plug the tv back on and turn the brightness to the max, like he went ‘Oh we’re bad boys?? Guess I’m finally a boy now!”
“Nonbinary bad boy Joel except he is not a boy.”
"First, [the submitter] think[s] she was raised as a gender that just. doesn't exist here. She was raised in Mezalea where how gender works is just. different and, because she has a beard, everyone assumed she was a man but she's NOT and in recent years has been figuring out her own identity and pronouns in a way she hasn't ever thought about before and also she and Lizzie are butch4femme, amen. Or bi4bi. Both? She’s a masculine person and she likes stuff like the bad boys because it's more of a title separate from her gender. She’s just a masculine woman, amen.”
“He's a sopping wet tanooki (cat /j) and [jizzie] are t4t bi4bi coded.”
“Joel hasn't been called girlfriend/wife/girl by his friends for NOTHING. Bro’s the definition of gender and he slays in a dress no matter what (in Minecraft and in irl)."
#transmcytshowdown#poll#joel smallishbeans#hermitcraft#life series#third life#last life#double life#limited life#secret life#wild life#empires smp#empires season one#empires season two
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