#bring back noble and diplomatic royalty in pink dresses!

[canvaswolfdoll]

my controversial mario movie take (before its release):

i'm actually disappointed luigi has been placed as the damsel in distress over peach.

like, i don't know how many 'post-' prefixes before 'modern' we're at, but, like, i feel like girlbossify princess peach and taking her out of her traditional role as damsel

a) fundamentally alters her character to the point that she's no longer true to the source material

b) denies the writers and audience the opportunity to examine the traditional 'damsel in distress' trope in an interesting way (like in the first two paper mario games)

don't know if i'm conveying my position well, but it's been so long since anyone's done a straight 'rescue the princess' narrative outside of the mario games (to my memory), that this change actually feels like the safe and boring decision.

[ignis-scientia-estrogen-brigade]

Chocobros reaction in discovering their s/o has eight older brother when their partner invite them to dinner and they are all eight here greeting the guys?

[ISEB Author’s Note: I have a trove of non-headcanon-related Asks in my inbox I’m planning on tackling this morning, so apologies in advance to my followers for the slew of posts that might show up on your newsfeed in the next couple of hours!]

Noctis: The heir to Lucis is reluctant to accept a dinner invitation to finally meet his paramour’s family; the Crown City Chronicle just loves to speculate about his personal life, and the more people who know he’s active in the dating scene, the more his face seems to wind up plastered on the front page of the gossip section. But he’s put off the inevitable for far too long, and his partner has assured him that their family is good at keeping secrets, so he grudgingly dresses in his finest raiment and heads off to meet his destiny. Turns out, it’s his lover who’s adept at withholding information, because they hadn’t breathed a single word about the eight older brothers they have and who are currently greeting the crown prince outside the front door. Noct loathes to draw attention to his status as royalty, but desperate times call for desperate measures, and he can only make a good first impression once; as he offers his most esteemed noble salutations to each one in turn, he surmises this is simply practice for all the diplomatic functions he’ll be subjected to when he becomes king.

Prompto: Formal settings already cause a great deal of anxiety for the socially-awkward youth, and his proven proclivity for doing the wrong thing at the worst possible moment only amplifies his jittery nerves. Indeed, his first course of action when he’s introduced to his paramour’s octet of brothers is to promptly spill an entire pitcher of water across the dining room table by accident; then there’s the seemingly impossible task of keeping their names straight, and when he’s mistaken all eight of them for one another even before the roasted Chickatrice has been served on the damp tablecloth, Blondie is secretly longing to taste the sole of his own boot. He manages to get through the rest of dinner without any more hiccups only by sitting on his hands and keeping a roll of bread in his mouth at all times, and nearly gallops to the front door when the evening concludes; as he bemoans later to his partner the weak first impression he inevitably made, they silence him with a vigorous shake of their head. “On the contrary,” they say. “My brothers think that tattoo on your wrist is quite impressive.”

Gladio: Perhaps the only one of the Crownsguard who isn’t the least bit intimidated by the notion of impressing his partner’s eight eldest siblings, Gladio knows a thing or two about being a protective older brother. It also helps that the big man can down a liter of Duscaen ale without batting an eyelash; nothing breaks the ice and brings a conglomerate of sheer testosterone together quite like the prospect of drinking to oblivion. He’s mindful enough to wait until his paramour’s parents have excused themselves for the evening before offering to take the brothers out to a local Insomnian bar, and the clock doesn’t even strike midnight yet when the sound of several off-key boozers singing a rousing rendition of the Lucian national anthem rings out through the seediest underbelly of Crown City. When Gladio drags himself back to where he originated from shortly after sunrise—helped along by clinging to the shoulders of his eight new friends, and nursing an excruciating hangover—his lover kindly points out that while they’re glad he hit it off so well with their kin, the next time he might be safer sticking to soft drinks.

Ignis: Few important tidbits of information slip past the strategist, which means he’s already memorized not only the names of his paramour’s eight older brothers, but also their respective dates of birth and current occupations before ever meeting them face-to-face. Specs admittedly has a tendency toward stuffiness in social situations, but he knows how to turn on the charm when the need arises; he has a lively conversation with the three eldest discussing the nuanced advantages of daggers over single-handed weapons, and takes great sport in amusing the five others with tales of the pranks he’s pulled as chamberlain to the crown prince—“Noct most certainly didn’t appreciate the time I ‘accidentally’ dyed his laundry pink,” he regales—and by the end of the evening, the siblings are already conferring amongst themselves how to secure a marriage proposal from the bespectacled royal steward for their own entertainment. But Ignis is reticent to be formally inducted into such a large and tight-knit family; “I have three of my own brothers who exhaust me to no end,” he quips. “The last thing I need is eight more to keep tabs on.”

[commander-yinello]

The Belfort Plot

Happy Birthday @queenofsebaciel! I hope you will enjoy my very first Dragon Age fic for you - the first part of a series with more to come. <3 More under the cut!

Dealing with Orlesian nobles almost made her want to fight another Archdemon. Almost.

As the man with the most pompous hat she’s ever seen droned on about the importance about overseas relations and other diplomatic things she already knew everything about, she tried her best not to let out a yawn, keeping her hands on her lap. Behaving like a Queen in front of so many people was something she thought she’d be used to by now, but it turns out that with great royalty comes great boredom.

In the corner of her eyes, she saw Alistair wiggle his eyebrows in an attempt to capture his attention. She tried to pretend not to see it, but her smile gave everything away. He proceeded to roll his eyes to show her what he thought of the speech and it was so hard not to giggle. If people saw what an adorable clown their King could be, they might take him less seriously, but not her. She only loved him more.

Everyone else in the throne room seemed to be falling asleep though. Maybe it was time for her to cut off the Marquis Belfort and get the discussion moving faster so they could do something more productive.

Before Queen Nasus Theirin-Cousland could utter a word, the sound of a window shattering grabbed their attention. A hooded figure jumped in and tossed a knife in the direction of the talking Marquis, hitting him right in the eye. Another noble screamed as the Marquis fell over.

The assassin wasted no time in trying to run away, but Nasus quickly brandished the dagger she hid inside her royal gown and jumped off the throne. Even with the impractical dress, she managed to outrace the assassin and effectively blocked their escape route through the window.

She quickly dodged a knife trying to slash her face and attacked the assassin. They moved away but not fast enough, as her blade cut through the hood. For a brief moment, the hood slipped off and Nasus could clearly make out elf ears.

Before she could wonder why and what, the elf kicked her down and jumped away, using another noble’s head as stepladder.

“After them!” Alistair shouted and the guards finally woke up, their armors making a hellish noise as they ran out of the throne room to chase the elf.

“My love, are you alright?” He kneeled and gently took hold of her hand to lift her up. Nasus grumbled as she stood - if only she had worn her armor underneath her dress like she wanted to. But her advisor had insisted it was not Queen-like. That was the last time she’d listen to him

Alistair’s worried face made her smile again, how easily he ignored everything around him to make sure she was safe. Being the center of his universe was something she had to get used to, but she liked it.

“I’m fine, they didn’t hurt me. But Alistair, if people catch wind that someone got murdered right here under our very noses… And oh Maker, House Belfort-”

“I know. We need to bring this assassin to justice before the people try to find their own justice. But how? We have no leads! Talk about a single hay in a needlestack.” Alistair frowned, making his crown shift lower on his forehead.

Nasus shook her head. “I saw they were an elf. And as far as we know, there’s only one group of killer elves running around in Denerim.”

***

“The Antivan Crows?” Warden Commander Inaro Aeducan almost dropped her cup of tea in surprise when Nasus mentioned the name.

“Now there is a name I haven’t heard in a small while. It is almost nostalgic.” Next to her, Zevran chuckled as he watched the Dwarven commander regain her composure, chastising him for making fun of her again.

Nasus smiled; it was good to see them again. Now that she and Alistair had taken the throne, their weeks had been full of trying to get the country back together after the Blight. Not an easy task, even with the help of all her friends that she met during their travels. “So I take it you aren’t aware of their activity of recent?”

“I wouldn’t say that.” Despite his elegant outfit, it was obvious he was the same as always. Inaro rolled her eyes.

Alistair let out a disapproving noise. “I still don’t know why you ever let him join us, Nasus.”

“Surely he’s been more than helpful since then, Alistair.” Nasus retorted and it made Alistair a little pink to see her wink at him like that. From Warden to King, he was still so easy to tease.

“Oh Maker, you didn’t spare us during camp, have mercy now.” Inaro lamented, which only made Nasus grin at her wickedly.

“Alright alright, back to the matter at hand. So what can you tell us about this assassination? Why did they kill Marquis Belfort? As far as we know, he didn’t seem like an unpopular man.” A boring one sure, but he rarely intervened in serious matters.

Zevran pondered for a moment. “From what I heard, the Belforts are rich and kind to its servants in their mansion in Denerim. Not to the point where they’ll pay them more but still. However one servant told me that once she tried to clean every corner of the basement, and when she got to a small room with a locked door, the son of Marquis Belfort yelled at her and almost hit her trying to chase her away.”

“I bet you anything that that’s where we’ll find a clue to what’s going on.”

Inaro confirmed her suspicions. As Nasus wanted to ask Alistair if he’d be alright with staying behind, the King jumped up from his chair. “I’ve been dying grab my sword! They won’t know what hit them!”

Alistair’s sudden action made Zevran and Inaro snicker. “Alistair, it’s not becoming of a King to act like this!” Zevran taunted him. Any other man would have thought twice of making fun of the King but not him - the four of them have been through enough that titles no longer matter.

“If I let you all go in there by yourself, you’re going to get squashed! Or did you forget how many times I saved your ass in the hordes of Darkspawn?” Alistair folded his arms looking at the sheepish trio. There was no denying that Alistair had protected them during all their fights.

Nasus sighed before clapping her hands. “I suppose I can ask my advisor to step in for us while we are away. Now, let’s investigate a basement!”

“I’ll contact the others and see if they can join.” Inaro wasted no time in summoning a warden to her side, who looked like a messenger and instructed him on riding out as soon as possible.

The smiles on everyone’s faces told her they had all been itching for a new adventure for a while now.

[marquisedemasque]

#like bowser kidnapping the head of state#of the mushroom kingdom#and treating it as a political hostage situation#instead of the unwanted suitor situation#would be a much more fascinating change#maybe have a scene of bowser being a real good conqueror#but peach being a much better paperwork and taxes monarch#and the need for both for a healthy nation#(to protect borders and keep wheels turning)#admittedly a bit complex for a family film#but luigi is just going to spend his screentime quaking#bring back noble and diplomatic royalty in pink dresses!#we can heal and experiment with the old ways!

my controversial mario movie take (before its release):

i'm actually disappointed luigi has been placed as the damsel in distress over peach.

like, i don't know how many 'post-' prefixes before 'modern' we're at, but, like, i feel like girlbossify princess peach and taking her out of her traditional role as damsel

a) fundamentally alters her character to the point that she's no longer true to the source material

b) denies the writers and audience the opportunity to examine the traditional 'damsel in distress' trope in an interesting way (like in the first two paper mario games)

don't know if i'm conveying my position well, but it's been so long since anyone's done a straight 'rescue the princess' narrative outside of the mario games (to my memory), that this change actually feels like the safe and boring decision.