#brad wolfie

[gyarucoded]

quick loki preview bc i have fallen down the rabbit hole since i have nothing else new to watch

the way loki used his magic was such a serve omg

i'm still in love with b-15 ♡

i appreciate the subtle humor, the jokes in other new mcu contents (minus the guardians of the galaxy) annoy me but here it's well balanced yet funny👍

when brad said "playing dress up" to loki idk what he fully meant but my mind wandered to teen loki switching fem presenting & borrowing [stealing] frigga's clothing to try them on for funsies n shit (i used to do that w my mom's wedding clothes as a child 2 lol)

when brad was messing w/ loki he had the opportunity to do the most suicidal thing ever and add sth like "who isn't even your real mother" after bringing up frigga (bro would have gotten ANNIHILATED Ijbol)

the slap was so funny & satisfying at the same time. i didn't saw it coming but i love this side of mobius

this ep's genuinely the most TERRIFYING loki has been in the mcu. in the chase scene and both of the interrogation. i absolutely support it idgaf !! he was more intimidating then he was in the first avengers movie which says a loooot

when loki mentioned the new york incident that was either lazy writing or babe got brain damage cuz i am pretty sure when he was mad at thor & odin that was in new mexico?? when he sent that metallic shit down or wtvt💀 to prevent thor from returning. but i forgive only because he mentioned tony lmfao

i love seeing sylvie finally being content. even if it was thru fuckass mcdonalds. i hope she won't be reduced to the "weird love interest" cuz her chara has potential and you can tell she's tired of this bs as well...

another episode of sylki being forced, toxic, keep disagreeing with & avoiding each other with rather tense chemistry instead of a romantic one they supposedly meant to have & being one sided as hell. their "romance" makes zero sense in this series' context & i could go off for longer regarding this topic but i'll save it for a seeperate post, later!

o.b & casey are so wholesome

bro i'm starting to ship lokius i think? (not in a fetishzing way i just like their dynamics and they just both happen to be dudes/male presenting) cuz i am sensing romantic & soulmate-ish undertones. sad that disney is a coward to make it canon...

overall i loved the 70s-90s vibes they seem to be going for. this show deffo has the best aesthetics we've seen in marvel phase 5 so far and i can't wait to see what's coming next.

[wolfsnape]

Je comprends pas trop la hype autour de Brad Pitt mais il a jamais été aussi beau que dans World War Z

[theanxiousauthorgrly]

Beyond the Path I. "Robin"

August 7th, 2008

Dear diary,

I heard something howling in the forest today. I was just walking on the path, going to my favorite grandmother and then I heard a strange sound like singing. A singing wolf! I <3 wolfies! I wish I could just run into the forest and go and hug him. He's prolly fluffy and warm. And so much fun to play with!!!** Carmen says that there are no animals in the forest besides the bugs. But I don't believe her! She always has her head in a teen magazine, and she doesn't go into the forest much. When she's in the forest, she just makes a fire. How could she see the chirping birds and sneaky squirrels if she's so busy staring at a fire? 

Me and my FAVORITEST sister Gingee never saw a wolf, but maybe this forest is his new home! I hope I can welcome him soon! I can't go out today :( Big sissy Scarlet says I can only go to the forest if Gingee comes, but it started raining when I came back from grandmother's house :( I'm soooo boooorrred! I can go out to play with Rose, but she is so BORING! All she does is pick flowers and watch the birds. She doesn't play like Gingee and me. We go on epic adventures in the forest as swashbuckley pirates! The trees are our ships, the ground is our ocean, and the pebbles in the pond are our buried treasure. Ugh, I want to go to the forest! For now, I'll draw Wolfie, and then maybe I'll ask Scarlet to play with me, or Ruby if she's not feeling too sad. I can still hear Wolfie howling in the forest. Sometimes I like to howl back to my furry friend, like I'm singing back to him.

Love,

Kid Red

References

**Harvey, Aureia, and Michael Samyn. "Kidred13." Live Journal, Brad Fitzpatrick, 7 Aug. 2008, kidred13.livejournal.com/. Accessed 3 Nov. 2024.

‌

[cityofiris]

you and I, we’re gonna live forever..

[tatjana-fantasy]

Ooh, this will be so fun! I already love reading the various opinions, so it's time to give my own ;D

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Games You've Played (In Order): Until Dawn, Man of Medan, Little Hope, House of Ashes, The Quarry, Hidden Agenda, The Devil in Me

Favorite Game: House of Ashes <3 Great characters with great character dynamics (imho), super action-packed, overall nice pacing and my favorite choice/consequence system. Until Dawn and Little Hope are honorable mentions for entirely different reasons. ;)

Least Favorite Game: Assuming Hidden Agenda doesn't count because it's kind of a cop-out, I'd choose Man of Medan. I LOVE how replayable it is and like the majority of the cast, but damn, I do not care for the story whatsoever :-/

Favorite Character From Each Game: Today, you mean? XD Fine: Chris (UD), Brad (MOM), Andrew (LH), Eric (HOA), Dylan (TQ), Felicity (HA), Erin (TDIM). But ask me tomorrow and my answers will probably be Mike, Conrad, John, Jason, Jacob, Becky and the entire TDIM cast. In general, the more flawed a character is, the more I like them :)

Least Favorite Character From Each Game: NO. I REFUSE. Hell, I even like characters like Alex (MOM) and Nick (TQ), who are usually regarded as least favorites. In general, I'm usually not fond of characters who are "just nice", but as you can see in my list above, they can also become my favorites ;)

Favorite Character Overall: Dylan (TQ). He's one of the few characters on my personal "perfect mix between complex and nice character" list. Shout-out to Eric (HOA), who's also on it :)

Least Favorite Character Overall: Nope, not doing it. I mean, I used to heavily dislike Emily (UD) and Jason (HOA) on my first playthroughs, only for both of them becoming two of my favorites after repeat playthroughs! Basically, my opinion changes veeery quickly ;D

Favorite Ships: SOOO MANY. Jason/Salim (HOA), Eric/Rachel (HOA), Chris/Ashley (UD), Felicity/Becky (HA), Mark/Kate (TDIM), Jamie/Erin (TDIM), Emma/Abigail (TQ), Jessica/Matt (UD), Ryan/Dylan (TQ) ... I love them all so much <3 Oh, and let's not forget Anthony/Therapy (LH). Obviously the best pairing ;)

Least Favorite Ships: Travis/Laura (TQ) and Charlie/Du'Met (TDIM) are not really my cup of tea, but since I'm quite open about shipping in general, I don't care if someone else ships it. :)

Dr. Hill Or The Curator Or Eliza: Dr. Hill! His sessions were actually interactive and he managed to be both an entertaining and frightening host. The Curator and Eliza don't have enough interaction for me ^^"

Wolfie Or Connie: Wolfie, duh. I have to admit that I don't particularly care for Connie since I got the feeling he was only in the game for the sake of having a dog :-/

And most importantly—

Favorite Version Of O'Death: Until Dawn! Both I also like Man of Medan's and The Devil in Me's versions :)

Least Favorite Version Of O'Death: Little Hope and House of Ashes are my favorite Dark Pictures games, but man, their versions of O'Death reeeaally don't please my ears XD

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Supermassive Questions Game!!!

Hi, guys! So I decided to make this game because I always really love hearing other people's thoughts and opinions on these games. If you want, be sure to tag your friends to keep this going! 😃

I'll go first, but I'll place a blank one under mine for the people who play after me. Have fun! 🖤 (Also, explanations to answers are optional.)

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Games You've Played (In Order): House Of Ashes, The Quarry, The Devil In Me, Until Dawn.

Favorite Game: Until Dawn (Great writing, amazing twists, loveable characters is what did it for me.)

Least Favorite Game: The Quarry (The fact that relationship decisions don't actually amount to anything, any little bearing we got was pointless and we got fuck all of an ending just makes me feel like the whole thing is pointless.)

Favorite Character From Each Game: Josh, Jason, Abi, Erin.

Least Favorite Character From Each Game: Emily, Rachel, Emma, Charlie.

Favorite Character Overall: Josh (Possibly just me being biased. 😂 But I do love his character and story a lot though — especially his humor. And I'm a sucker for a tragic story as well. 😂)

Least Favorite Character Overall: Charlie (Just an overall dick, in my opinion. And he annoyed the absolute hell out of me.)

Favorite Ships:

Chris and Ashley (Just fucking adorable! 💖)

Mike and Sam (They had great chemistry and I really enjoyed seeing them together in the last chapter.)

Matt and Jess (There is something about these two together that just... Works for me, y'know?)

Rachel and Clarice (Clarice just seemed to bring out the good in Rachel. That scene with just the two was the only time I actually liked Rachel in the game.)

Erin and Jamie (There was something about those two that was just so cute. And the part where they kiss for the first time melted my damn heart! The whole soft cinnamon roll/tough bitch dynamic gets me a lot too. 😂)

Least Favorite Ships:

Chris and Josh (Chris was head over heels for Ashley and Josh was CLEARLY very into girls so I don't really get it that much.)

Josh and Sam (Yeaaaaaaaah... They are just like water and oil, ok? I don't think they would actually mix well as a couple. 😂 And Sam belongs with Mike anyway. 💖)

Emily and Jess (Just not a fan. I don't know why.)

Jason and Salim (Another one I don't get that much. I used to ship them a long time ago because it was so popular, but then I realized that it just didn't make much sense to me so I stopped. I mean, one of the chapters about them is literally called "Brothers" so that just makes me think that that's the relationship the devs were aiming for with those two.)

Rachel and Eric/Rachel and Nick (If you played the game, you know my reasons. 😂)

Any characters with Du'met (Just not a really big fan of it at all. Doesn't make much sense to me neither.)

(I've only played Until Dawn, House Of Ashes, The Quarry and The Devil In Me. So that's why the list is without other ships from other games. But I'm not adding any of The Quarry ships to this list because it seemed like nothing came out of the relationship decisions and I didn't enjoy the characters as much so I tend to ignore ships from that game.Also, no hate towards the people who ship the ones I listed as least favorite. To each their own.)

Dr. Hill Or The Curator Or Eliza: Hmmmmmm... Probably Dr. Hill. (He was more creatively written than the others, in my opinion.)

Wolfie Or Connie: Fuck, I should have thought this through before writing it down. 🤣 Although I LOVE Connie with all my heart, Wolfie did get more screentime which led me to have a bit more of an attachment to him. So I'll have to go with Wolfie.

And most importantly—

Favorite Version Of O'Death: The Dark Pictures Anthology theme for sure!

Least Favorite Version Of O'Death: Though I didn't play the games, I heard the ones for Man Of Medan and Little Hope and I just wasn't a fan.

So those are my answers! I hope you guys have as much fun as I did doing this. And also, no hate towards the people who like the games/characters/ships that I don't. To each their own. 💖

So anyway, the blank one is down below. ⬇️

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Games You've Played:

Favorite Game:

Least Favorite Game:

Favorite Character From Each Game:

Least Favorite Character From Each Game:

Favorite Character Overall:

Least Favorite Character Overall:

Favorite Ships:

Least Favorite Ships:

Dr. Hill Or The Curator Or Eliza:

Wolfie Or Connie:

And most importantly—

Favorite Version Of O'Death:

Least Favorite Version Of O'Death:

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[javitrulovesims]

Raising three kids is never easy -- particularly when one refuses to marry and one is a gloomy rebel with dangerous ideas. But Mila Munch is nothing if not dedicated to her family, and her sweet little Lucas always cheers her up after a hard day of cooking work

On a cold morning, about 4 years ago, Mila Munch woke up to realize her husband was gone. His took his clothing, the money and left without saying a word. In order survive and raise his 3 boys, Mila, and his family moved out into a cheap medium size cottage and took a job as a Cook on the Villareal Manor. Gunther, Her older son just started to work on the local school as teacher, a place that has give him a quite respectable reputation among the ladies, however Gunther seems to be happier with a book on his hands rather than with a young woman. Wolfgang on the other hand is always either angry or gloomy and he is a young man with radical ideas and big distaste against the Windenburg high society. And of course, he is the leader of the unfamous Anarchist group self-named “The Renegades”. Little Lucas always loves to help around the house and the garden after school and sometimes spend his days on the Kitchen of the Villareal Manor just helping his mother to prepare endless meals for parties and gatherings.

[biterage]

//national puppy day???? Bully brad day..... same thing

[lovinglapislazuli]

Legendz Tale of the Dragon Kings (English Dub)

anonymous:

Here's an English Dub for “Legendz: Tale of the Dragon Kings”.     •    Shuzo "Shu" Matsutani - Pamela Adlon     •    Meg Sprinkle/Melissa Sparks/Mrs. McField - Kari Wahlgren     •    Mike "Mac" McField - Candi Milo     •    Dino Sparks - Jesse McCartney     •    Halca Hepburn/Garion the Griffin - Vanessa Marshall     •    BB (Bouchou)/Yoko Matsutani/Anna the Harpy/Mrs. Sprinkles - Grey DeLisle     •    J1/Wolfy the Werewolf/Greedo the Blazedragon/Mr. McField/Bruno Sparks - Rob Paulsen     •    Sasuke Matsutani/J2/Mr. Sprinkles - Jeff Bennett     •    Professor Parkins - Maurice LaMarche     •    Ranshiin/The Dark Wiz Company President/Rapper King - Kevin Michael Richardson     •    Yul Hepburn/Dark Wiz Company CEO - James Arnold Taylor     •    Lad Hepburn - Kath Soucie     •    Nezuccho (hamster size) - Tara Strong     •    Shiron the Windragon - Yuri Lowenthal     •    Dandy the Crocodile/Leon the Manticore - Corey Burton     •    Zuou the Bigfoot - Brad Garrett

------

I am not familiar at all with this series but I like the designs, these kids look very endearing :D

[veinsandknuckles]

fic masterlist 

About/BYF

I sometimes take requests, but I have a VERY bad track record with filling them unless they’re simple/short and related to my current hyperfixation (usually the first thing listed in my blog description). Even worse track record for anything soft/fluffy for most characters/pairings fic tag here

Sam Vimes/f!Reader (Discworld) Long hard road pt 1, pt 2, pt 3, pt 4 (explicit)

Brad Bakshi/Reader Vulnerable You'll just have to learn the hard way, pt 1, pt 2, pt 3, pt 4, pt 5 (explicit) Oh, Wolfie pt 1, pt 2 (explicit) Abed Nadir/Reader Shutdown Everyday heroics Comparison of appetites (explicit) Reflect what you are, pt 1, pt 2 Ruben Patterson/f!Reader (Shootfighter) Break the cutie, pt 1 (explicit)

Johnny Lawrence/f!Reader (Cobra Kai) Lessons, pt 1, pt 2, pt 3 (explicit) Tallahassee/f!Reader (Zombieland) It’s a bad life if you don’t weaken pt 1, pt 2, pt 3, pt 4, pt 5, pt 6, pt 7 (explicit) pt 8, pt 9, pt 10 clumsiness (explicit) Haymitch Abernathy/f!Reader (Hunger Games) The grosser points of seduction pt 1, pt 2

Dragon Age Remembering Karl (Anders/Karl)  PMS blues (trans!Anders/f!Hawke) (explicit) Shane Walsh/f!Reader (The Walking Dead) Fucking in the bushes (explicit)

[gyarucoded]

reviewing loki s2 ep4 (major spoilers!)

i was bit hesitant thowards this ep cuz i started noticing how this season parallels the previous one, which went very downhill after ep3 however, i think it seem to get better this time? 🤔🤭 this is so far my fav episode and hopefull they'll keep this energy for the last 2 eps. ok let's get into it:

i don't think this was timed like this on purpose but love how we're 3 days away from halloween and this episode fits with it so well. i could be biased as a horror fan but i loved the eeriness (is that even a term?)

brad you stupidass why are you listening to ravonna when she clearly doesn't care about any of your lives on the time line 😭

ooouu the box scene 😧 not miss minutes' psycho ass smiling like she's getting creepier each ep- also as someone who watches gory movies i expected to see what was left of all the prisoners but then i remembered disney tries to keep shit as "family friendly" as possible altough i am not complaining cuz it's a lot more cinematic to just hear the blood droplets & it leaves space for our imagination!

why does it feel like b-15 is lowkey the true leader of the tva now? i can definitely vibe with that.

"which way, wizard?"

B-15 is strong af for not throwing up at *that* scene but ig she has seen more gruesome sights before.

i just know ppl gonna ship o.b, casey & victor as a poly-couple and i'm a 100% there for it lmaoo

even sylvie calling it "bromance" like miss ma'am's gay radar was going havoc, and her smile when HWR death was mentioned plss🤚 😭

i know sylvie meant well when she snapped at mobius for yk, "not reading the room" but i still felt kinda bad for mobius cuz i can deffo see him as the stress eater-type.

loki mentioning thor !!!!

the parallels between thor & jane and loki & mobius hmmm.....hmmmm...

what sylvie said about anhiliation & starting from scratch reminded me of thanos in endgame, sry baby 💀

well despite of that, still think sylvie is in the middle of her positive character arc/development

we're also witnessing loki's growth !! (notice how in 1x04 mobius told him to grow up?) he's possibly even more mature then he was in the sacred time line but that was due his sctripted fate of being a "loser" that sabotaged him from more rational choices but now he's free to think & do what he wants n i love that for him.

goodbye miss minutes i assure you that nobody's gonna miss yew. 💁‍♀️

now why did x-5 had to ruin that wholesome moment this badly ><=$^[_=

despite of sylvie & loki not fully agreeing on moral issues and stuff, i enjoyed them working together, it was finally sylvie's turn to show off her magic 😋

loki was so soft & reassuring with victor timely only for him to be spaghettified ?? i knew they'd probs kill him off but i didn't expect it to be such a weird & immidate death 😭 kinda sad cuz i don't think they'll bring that version of him back.

idk how to feel about ravonna getting pruned. not sure she'll get redeemed cuz it's too late for that now but pruning doesn't kill an invidual so it's likely that her story doesn't just end here.

love the soundtrack in this series generally but in the latest episode it's outstanding ! natalie holt truly added her whole 🐱 into this ost 🙏

the cliffhanger is absolutely killing me, i'll have to absorb all the theories until next friday like i fr cannot wait ngfddjfsvbm

[wolfsnape]

No one:

Not a single soul:

Me: Why would you CARE about Brad Pitt's Achilles when HECTOR is ERIC BANA

[wolfythewitch]

wolfy I live where troy used to take place and what have you done whenever I pass by the horse from the brad pitt movie or go to the museum I think of you or whatever what have you done what have you done wh-

Heheheehh

[w28fovldyzdhjsfjdh]

The Nobody wails.

[gross-gal]

F/O List

Mostly just sharing these in case any of my followers have similar romantic f/os and aren’t comfortable sharing! Also I guess to share who I like.

Bold are ones I really and Italics are more crushes tbh.

Yes Man (Fallout:New Vegas)

Nergal (Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy)

Murdoc Niccals (Gorillaz)

Noodle (Gorillaz)

Launchpad McQuack (Disney)

Scaramouche (Samurai Jack)

Pete (Disney)

Revali (Breath of the Wild)

The Almighty Tallests (Invader Zim)

Toffee (Star vs The Forces of Evil)

Karamatsu Matsuno (Osomatsu-San)

Jasper (Steven Universe)

Rocket Raccoon (Marvel)

❤️Repo Mantis (Rise of the TMNT)❤️

Hypnopotamus (Rise of the TMNT)

Big Mama (Rise of the TMNT)

Commander Peepers (Wander over Yonder)

Brad Starlight (Wander over Yonder)

Lord Dominator (Wander over Yonder)

Smartass/Smarty (Who Framed Roger Rabbit)

Panty Anarchy (Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt)

Gaz Digzy (Ballmastrz 9009)

Zabel Zarock/Lord Raptor (Darkstalkers)

Lei-Lei/Hsien-Ko (Darkstalkers)

Gosha (Beastars)

Koichi Zenigata (Lupin the Third)

Fujiko Mine (Lupin the Third)

Arsène Lupin III (Lupin the Third)

Thel ‘Vadam (Halo)

Crypto (Destroy All Humans!)

Wolfie/Wolfy (Tex Avery Cartoons)

Professor Ratigan (The Great Mouse Detective)

[lozenger8]

just a broken machine

Scott Gen, written for Days 3 & 4 for Scott McCall Appreciation Week. CW for injuries and blood. 

It’s a Tuesday when Scott first notices. He’s late to class because of a late night helping his selkie friend Mae and the guy who likes to ask ‘provocative questions’ from the front row is pissed because Scott steals their lecturer’s attention.

“Dumbass,” the guy says, scowling, not even bothering to mutter like most people might under the same circumstances.

Scott brushes it off, like he brushes everything at Davis off, because he’s been through way too much to care about pathetic insults. But as he walks to his next class, he notices there’s a paper cut on his finger. Paper cuts usually heal within 30 seconds. But this one stays with him for the rest of the day.

At Lacrosse on Friday, Scott scores the most goals and the opposing team’s captain shakes his hand, but also insinuates Scott’s on steroids.

“There’s no way you’re that quick naturally,” Brad or Brent or Bront says. “I almost feel sorry for you. The side-effects are gonna fuck you up.”

“I don’t take drugs,” Scott counters, because Braeden or Brandon or Brat wasn’t as subtle as Jackson was way back when, and anyway, Scott’s learned his lesson there.

And what Scott wants to say is, “I train hard. Maybe if you did the same, you wouldn’t have to make baseless accusations.”

But instead he says, “I just try my best.”

“Yeah. Sure. You lying prick,” the bastard replies, walking away and then flipping Scott off.

That night, Scott has a gash in his arm that he didn’t get playing. A gash that isn’t totally gone in the morning, but instead gives him a persistent ache all through work.

The week passes and more wounds appear, slicing deep into Scott’s skin, making him bleed. He disinfects and dresses the wounds, calls his mom, messages Malia, and meditates. He can never work out how he’s gotten the injury in the first place, and is equally confused his healing factor hasn’t kicked in.

It’s the next Tuesday when he sees the cut spontaneously appear, as one of his lecturers mocks his pronunciation of a term he’s only ever read before. It’s three inches long, carved into his forearm. It begins to bleed profusely and doesn’t let up even when he bandages it.

He calls Alan, but Alan’s never heard of anything like it. He texts Derek, who says he’ll look into it. And he Skypes Stiles, who he initially thinks he isn’t going to tell, but somehow does anyway.

“I’m flying over there and punching the next dick who so much as looks at you funny,” Stiles intones. He isn’t joking.

“As tempting as that is, you need to keep saving up for June.”

“Damn you and your persistent need to be responsible all the time,” Stiles says, then rears back in his chair and stares, horror-stricken.

Scott feels the trickle of blood before he realizes a cut has opened on his forehead, above his right eyebrow. It hurts, but only a little. Stiles’ expression hurts more.

“Scott. Scotty. I am so sorry. I didn’t mean it. I was just… Fuck,” Stiles says, choked up.

Scott grabs a tissue and dabs at the wound. “I know, Stiles. You didn’t mean it. Honestly, don’t worry. I’ll be fine.”

Stiles clearly takes two deep breaths, then moves closer to his camera again. “You think maybe this is why it’s happening?”

“What?”

“The way you take every blow people land on you. The way you discount your own pain. The way you wear the weight of the world on your shoulders and carry it with you everywhere you go like some fucked up wolfy Sisyphus?”

Scott blinks down at his hands, lets out his own calming breath. He hadn’t thought of it that way before. “Maybe. But what should I do? Get angry at every small slight? You’ve seen me angry. It’s dangerous.”

“You don’t need to worry about being dangerous, Scott. You’re the strongest person I know. But what I mean is -- maybe this is your body telling you that you need to acknowledge when something hurts. Maybe it’s trying to remind you that you’re allowed to be angry and sad and in pain occasionally.”

They say goodnight after another half hour of chatting and Scott digests Stiles’ suggestions.

The next time Scott’s running drills in Lacrosse training and one of the freshmen murmur that he’s a grade-A asshole, Scott sets aside a minute to recognize how shitty he feels, especially considering he’s been helping out for two hours. A small cut appears on his finger, but it heals within a minute.

For the next month, every time someone says something callous or cruel or petty, Scott allows himself a moment to notice how it hurts. After a while, his body stops reacting to the words as if they were bullets. Scott realizes that he’s been wearing the scars of insults for years, it’s just that before they would never show.  And it’s hard, to acknowledge the pain, to force himself to recognize it. It’s so much easier to push it all down and bury it deep.

But it’s so much better, too, inside and out.

[eternalstereksecretsanta]

Which one of us is Ken?

@kieren-fucking-walker | AO3

When they wake up, they’re packed in boxes and in front of them are a lot of Nerf guns carefully organized. 

The Barbie AU no one asked for. Fluff. Angst, Hurt/Comfort. Post-canon. Kid!Fic. But not actually theirs. Dolls.

So. There was a witch involved. Because there always has to be a witch involved when this kind of things happen. What kind of things happened, you ask? Well, Stiles can very well tell you he’s not in the mood for explanations and to fuck off. Derek probably won’t answer but it isn’t like that’s something new.

The thing about the situation is that, neither of them can move on their own. And no, it’s not because of Kanima poison, or because some petrificus totalus shit. It’s because they got turned into dolls.

Yes.

Dolls.

The Barbie kind.

Laugh all you want, they can’t actually do anything to stop you.

There was a fight, they got hit by a spell and next thing they know, they’re inside of a box, in the toy zone of a store, in front of the Nerf guns. And a little girl is in front of them begging her dad to buy the Derek and Stiles’ boxes. Because they’re in separated boxes, but the little girl didn’t want to leave them alone in the hall and bless her little soul and her dad’s. Neither of them want to be alone right now.

So, both of them are Kens and the little girl, Suzie, if they heard correctly, is really into Barbie right now and she needs some Kens for her Barbie’s house. She calls them by their names, so they assume the boxes have their names printed on them… but that doesn’t actually make them feel better.

***

Her room is big. At least from the size they are right now, it is. It’s painted in bright pink and she has a big doll house in one corner where she puts both Stiles and Derek, now out of their boxes. They’re supposed to be in a tea party with four other girls and four other guys. They don’t understand why she needed two more guys if the couples were made. Once she’s called to have dinner and they’re alone in the room, the dolls start to wake up and take life.

“Oh my god! You’re both so adorable together! I understand why Suzie pick you up,” one of the Barbies, the doctor one, says.

“What do you mean?” Stiles answers, feeling himself a little rusty as he moves his plastic limbs.

“I mean you look cute. Duh. I’m Summer, by the way,” she answers with a smile.

Of course there’s a Barbie Summer here, Stiles thinks.

“This is Christie,” she points at her right, a girl with dark skin and beautiful smile. “Teresa,” she points her left and a girl with light-brown skin waves at them. “And that one is Barbara, but we all call her Barbie. She’s sad.” They look at the generic Barbie, sitting in a corner of the house.

“Why?” Stiles asks.

“Oh, Kenneth and she broke up again. He accused Barbie of cheating and he’s now somewhere. He was sitting here minutes ago.” Summer answers, looking around. “Huh. Well, you’ll meet Ken soon enough. Now, the boys!” the three girls giggle and then look serious again. “Allan, Brad and Curtis.” They look unbothered, talking and not paying attention to them. “They’re so handsome…” Summer says in a sigh and Derek and Stiles cringe. “So, what are your names?”

“Derek,” Stiles answers for them, knowing Derek’s not going to say a word. He points at Derek who has his arms crossed over his chest. “And I’m Stiles.”

“Stiles… That’s a really unusual name,” Teresa says.

“It’s a nickname. My real name is Polish.”

“Oh… And which collection are you?” Christie asks.

Derek and Stiles look at each other and they share an eyebrows-to-mouth conversation and Stiles looks back at them, the three looking at them weirdly. Oddly enough, he thinks of the pack.

“We’re not actually dolls.” Stiles says.

“What do you mean?”

“We, uh… We were humans, until two hours ago…” the three girls take a step back and Stiles sighs, sitting on his chair again. “We were attacked by a witch and got turned into dolls. When we woke up we were inside the boxes and Suzie was picking us up. But our friends are still out there, probably worried about us because they don’t know where we are… so if we suddenly disappear, you now know why.” Stiles finishes, and Derek looks at him like he doesn’t know what to do.

“Why were you fighting a witch?” Barbie asks, from her corner and every doll in the room look at her.

“That’s kinda what we do. We’re a pack. Derek here, he’s a werewolf… or at least he’s supposed to be a werewolf, I don’t know how that spell works. How are you feeling, you feeling wolfie or human? Can you smell me? What do I smell like?”

“Yes, Stiles. I can smell you perfectly fine.” Derek answers, gritting his teeth. “You smell like plastic. But underneath all of that it’s the same scent you’ve always had. And yes, I can hear your heartbeat.”

“Huh… Well, that’s something, right?”

“Yes, but I don’t think I can shift.”

“Oh, fuck!”

All of the dolls in the room gasp and Derek rolls his eyes, Stiles looks at them confused.

“What is it?”

“You said a curse word, Stiles.” Derek answers.

“Oh… Huh.”

***

Two nights later, Suzie left the house prepared for a big party and when she’s asleep, all dolls come to life and put the music on, starting to dance at the rhythm and Derek escapes the room. Stiles follows him the moment he realizes he’s going to the first floor, probably, and sits beside him on the three steps, on the porch. Derek is looking at the bed where Suzie sleeps, it’s beside the window and they can see the night outside, the light of a street lamp breaking through the curtains.

“Hey,” Stiles says, not looking at Derek.

“Hey.”

They stay silent for a few minutes, listening to the loud music upstairs and ignoring the fun the other dolls are having.

“Do you think they’ll find a way to get to us? Soon?” Derek asks, trying to mask his worried tone.

“I don’t know… They’ll probably find a rather quick way… If they didn’t kill the witch.”

“If… they didn’t quick the witch.” Derek murmurs and then sighs defeated. “They killed the witch.”

“They totally killed the witch.” Stiles answers and then chuckles. “Why do our friends are the ‘kill, then ask questions’ type of people?”

“I don’t really know… We’ll be stuck in here for a long time, huh?” Derek looks at him with a tired expression.

“Seems like it.”

***

A month and a half into the spell, Suzie comes to the room crying, all the dolls exchange worried looks and it’s not the first time Stiles has seen them wanting to go over to Suzie to hug her. Even he wants to do it. Derek looks uncomfortable on his seat but he does look worried, his eyebrows say so. Suzie falls asleep somewhere between the crying and sobbing and they all talk about what could possibly have happened to make Suzie cry like that. The next morning, Suzie has puffy eyes and her throat is soar when she speaks, her father hasn’t come to wake her up and she wanders in the room, looking for a pretty white dress he bought for her a few weeks ago. The dolls don’t know what’s happening and they confess they were a gift from her dad a few months ago. When she has her dress on her bed, she walks to the Barbie house and picks Derek and Stiles. She climbs on the bed again and sits them on the windowsill, looking outside of the house.

“Today’s my birthday…” she murmurs, and she sounds small, shouldn’t she be happy? “And yesterday was my mommy’s anniversary.”

Oh…

“Daddy should be asleep. He said we have a big party today for me with my family, but you know, I just want my mommy back,” she says with a watery voice. “You know? I picked you both because… in your boxes said that Stiles didn’t have a mother like me, and Derek didn’t have a family… I wanted you to give company to each other…” she sobs, and Stiles wants to hug her so badly, he almost feels his plastic limbs moving. “It was my fault. I shouldn’t have make her go to buy that cake. It was my fault…”

The room’s door opens and her dad comes in running, eyes red, full of tears and a sad expression on his face, he hugs her and rocks her on her lap while murmuring it wasn’t her fault, and it’ll never be her fault. They both cry hugging each other with force, and after a few minutes he sobs and kisses her head.

“Come on, baby. We have a birthday party to prepare and the princess needs to give all the orders.”

She chuckles and sobs at the same time, and then she jumps out of her dad’s lap and smiles all watery.

“I’ll take a shower! The king should do that too! All the invitations said they should come for lunch and the castle needs to be prepared!” she runs for the bathroom, laughing, and her father stays sitting on the bed, he sighs and touches the white dress with careful hands.

Then he stands up and leaves the room.

***

“You ok?” Stiles asks Derek once the door is closed.

“It was my fault, you know? They’re all dead because of me.”

Stiles looks at him like he’s crazy and Derek flinches from his gaze. Stiles realizes that maybe, in these 14 years since the fire, no one has ever told Derek it wasn’t his fault, and that makes him angry.

“Did you start the fire?” he asks, anger on his voice.

“No, but…”

“Did you lock your family in your basement?” he asks again.

“No, but…”

“Did you put the circle of mountain ash?” Stiles interrupts again.

“No! But…!”

“Then it wasn’t your fault!” Stiles almost yells.

“I lured her into my house! I was the one who showed her we were werewolves!”

“She already knew, Derek!” Stiles says, voice almost cracking. Derek has thought about this so many times because Kate worked him up into thinking it. “She was aware of you and your family, Derek. You didn’t tell her anything she wasn’t in the know of. It. Wasn’t Your. Fault.”

“But if I didn’t… If I didn’t let her talk me into having a relationship…”

“She would have found a way to get to all of you. To burn the house with all of you inside. Laura, Cora and you too. There wouldn’t be any Hales left.”

“And what good has done that, huh!?” Derek retorts, “Peter killed my older sister. Cora was kidnapped. I killed my uncle.”

“But you, Derek, you are alive. Cora is alive. Peter, although crazy, is alive. Maybe Laura isn’t, but she wouldn’t want you to think the world would be better if you weren’t in it. It wouldn’t, and you know that. You know that.”

Derek doesn’t say anything, he just lowers his head, looking at his hands.

“You know that, right?” Stiles asks, worried tone on his voice, and he tries to make Derek look at him. “Derek?”

“I know. I just can’t help but think about it.”

“Nobody is asking you to stop thinking about it. I know it’s hard to stop thinking about the ‘what if’s, but you need to understand and believe it wasn’t your fault, and that the world would be really different without you.”

“Thanks…” Derek murmurs.

“That’s what I’m here for, Der…ek. Just like Suzie said, I’m here to keep you company. And call on your bullshit.”

Derek chuckles a bit and Stiles calls it a win.

***

Suzie plays with them a lot, but she doesn’t bring any friend to her room. She imagines these big fairy tales where the girls are the ones that save the boys, or where everyone is kidnapped in one of the rooms and superhero-Stiles saves the day and gets the guy. Sometimes she does these big tea parties and she invites her dad to sit with her and drink cold water from a teacup. There are other times where she takes one doll and she just falls sleep holding it, and it would surprise Stiles that she picks Derek a lot more than any of the others. Both of them need a lot of cuddles and snuggles, so he doesn’t complain – that much –. When Suzie sleeps, and Derek is not on her bed, he sits on the house’s porch and Stiles sits beside him to make him company. They don’t talk about the fire anymore, or about the Nogitsune, even if Stiles ‘wakes up’ from nightmares when Derek sleeps with Suzie. They are very aware that both of them have demons, and they should talk about them, but it almost seems like their eyebrows-to-mouth conversations can express more than words.

The first time they hold hands it’s because of Suzie. They’re in one of the weekly tea parties, and she paired everyone. In the end, Stiles and Derek sat beside each other – shocker – and Suzie took their plastic hands and put one on top of the other. It isn’t their first ‘casual’ touch (if they count the hand-on-shoulder thing), but it’s really weird because Derek’s hand feels cold on his hand, it’s uncomfortable because they can’t blend their palms into each other’s, and Stiles feels the urge to move his hand and intertwine their fingers, even if it’s impossible because his fingers are stick to each other.

It’s weird. It’s uncomfortable. And Stiles wants more.

***

It’s not that Derek isn’t aware of Stiles constant presence beside him. He is, he really is. But as a doll, he can’t really use his senses to feel if there is any threat coming from outside. So, he just focuses on the figure constantly sitting by his side on the porch. Stiles is a lot quieter in this doll form, like he doesn’t really have something to say to Derek. And Derek gets it, they’re together most of the day, it’s almost impossible for them to have something to say that the other doesn’t already know. That, of course, if they don’t talk about their past issues. Because that seems like a taboo topic between them.

“I just realized that I’ve been missing work for two and a half months…” Stiles comments, frowning.

“It’s been two and a half months?” Derek asks, looking at him with his eyebrows raised.

“I know, right? It doesn’t seem like it. Do you think Suzie will miss us when they rescue us?”

“She probably would. She likes talking to us…”

“She does… I’m gonna miss her too, you know? She’s a nice girl and I really hope she can grow into the grieve of her mother’s death. It’ll make her feel empty in a few years, when she needs someone to talk about boys, or girls, or just something she doesn’t want to tell her dad. And she’s gonna miss her really, really much.”

“I know… It’s really messed up that she has to feel that pain at such young age.”

“Yeah…”

They don’t say anything else. Suzie’s 7 now, she won’t remember her mother’s face and she’ll only recognize her when she sees her on photos. And Derek and Stiles can’t help but think about their own mothers. 10 and 16 aren’t ages to lose a parent either. No age is an age to lose a parent.

***

When they wake up, they’re lying on the floor, have the clothes Suzie put on them last night, and the pack is looking at them with open eyes and bright smiles.

“We did it!” Scott says excited and kneels down to hug Stiles.

“Oh, my god, Scott, please let me move” Stiles complains when he can’t stand up.

“We’re back,” Derek murmurs. “We’re back, Stiles.” He says again.

“Yeah!” Stiles says, getting up and offering a hand to Derek, he takes it and stands up too. “Dude, I have three months of paperwork to do… That’s gonna be so much fun.” He says sarcastically.

“Three months?” Scott says. “Bro, you’ve been gone for two days, three at max.”

“What?” they both murmur.

“Yeah. We killed the witch.” Derek and Stiles snort and the pack look at them suspiciously. “And we came to Deaton. Lydia found how to bring you back. She said you were in Sacramento but didn’t specify how you got there.” Scott continues.

“Yeah, the witch turned us into dolls and a little girl bought us at a store. We didn’t know where we were, we figured we were still here…” Stiles answers and then his eyes widen. “Derek!” he pats Derek’s arm rapidity until he rolls his eyes and looks at him. “Suzie!”

They both look at each other, silent conversation going on until Derek sighs and rubs his palm on his face, Stiles looks anxious and he starts looking around the room. They’re at the vet, obviously, but Deaton is nowhere to be seen.

“Where’s Deaton?” Stiles asks.

“In the other room, he’s taking care of a puppy and… where are you going!?” Malia says.

“To see Deaton, come on, Derek!” Derek walks behind him rapidly, the pack look at each other and they walk behind them, curiously.

Alan Deaton is treating with carefulness a scared puppy. It’s brown, it’s trembling and tries to hide from Deaton’s touch.

“Deaton!” Stiles says, entering the room, the puppy squeaks.

“Mr. Stilinski, could you please be quiet? This puppy is as afraid as it is without you bursting into the room.”

“I’m sorry, but this is important.” Stiles continues, hushed voice instead of loud, looking at the puppy.

“Ah, yes. I guess I’m supposed to say, ‘Welcome back’, right?” he says, condescending tone ever so present.

“Yeah, yeah, we’re back, yay us. That’s not exactly what I want to ask you.”

“And what is it, then?” Deaton takes the puppy on his hands and puts it in a box, where the other puppies are jumping happily at the new member.

Overwhelming love, Stiles thinks and snorts.

“So, let’s say, hypothetically speaking, that the witch turned us into Barbie dolls and this little girl bought our boxes in a store, probably in Sacramento. We’re back and Scott tells us we’ve only been gone for a couple of days, but to us it was like three months. Will that still happen? Like, Su–the little girl– will bought the toys boxes and take them to her house, right? Hypothetically speaking, of course.” Stiles rushes to say.

“I’m not quite sure I understand what you mean, Mr. Stilinski, but hypothetically speaking, I don’t think she’ll be able to find the same toys where she left them because they don’t actually exist.”

“Damn it,” Stiles murmurs and then groans in exasperation.

It’s only been three months, he tells himself, but she’s in desperately need to talk to someone about everything and… god, when did I start to care so much for her?

“Is there a spell that can work out a stuffed doll or Barbie dolls out of the essence of someone?”, surprisingly, Derek asks.

“There might be, yes. But we need a witch for that to happen. A powerful one at that.”

“I can talk to miss Cadogan. I’m sure she’ll be eager to help.” Stiles mutters to Derek.

“She’s too old, Stiles.” Someone from behind says but he doesn’t have the willpower to care who it was.

“Text me everything we need. And take a shower first, please. You haven’t showered in three months.” Derek says, and there’s a smirk there, on his lips.

“Oh, shut up, you don’t smell that good either.”

And just when Derek turns around, Stiles realizes the missing, soothing hand on the small of his back that was most likely, very surely and distinctly Derek’s.

***

They’re going around the toy store, walking the aisles in employee’s uniforms. At the moment, they haven’t encountered another employee going around and the other two that let them borrow their uniforms are very well placed in the janitor’s closet. Very well unconscious. They’re whispering banter back and forth, smirking the whole time and walking really close when they spot Suzie’s father, trying to control the little girl’s outburst about toys.

“I don’t get it, dad! They were right here! I want my Derek and Stiles back!” she says, looking behind dolls like if she moves them enough, she can find another pair.

“We’ll find them somewhere, baby.” Her father answers, and he looks tired. A lot more tired than the last time they saw him.

“Hello, what seems to be the problem?” Stiles asks them, smile on his face.

“Stiles!” Suzie says and Stiles’ heart clenches.

“Suzie, honey, it’s not polite to call people by other names that are not theirs.” His father says, looking a little astonished, probably noticing the resemblance between the toys and the two men standing in front of them.

“I’m sorry…” she murmurs and lows down her head.

“It’s ok…” Derek answers softly. “Are you looking for a Stiles’ doll?”

“Yes! And Derek’s!” Suzie answers before her father.

“Well, little Suzie, we’re afraid to tell you that they’re discontinued. They weren’t that popular in the doll version, but we do have one last item in the Stiles and Derek collection.”

“I wanna see it! Can we see it, daddy?” she says eagerly.

“Of course, we can, honey. Please, gentlemen, show us the way.”

Derek and Stiles walk around some aisles until they’re in the stuffed animal and doll hall. In the middle of one of the shelves there’s a stuffed version of Stiles and Derek, holding hands. Stiles has a set of moles, brown eyes, a big smile and a blush. Derek has his eyes electric blue, two fluffy fangs in each corner of his mouth and a little flush too. They’re wearing the same clothes they had when they first disappeared, and Suzie looks so happy Stiles can’t help but smile with her.

“And you know, little Suzie,” Stiles says. “This version of them is a little bit different from the two dolls’ version.”

“Really? Why?” she asks, interested in the story.

“Well, I’m sure the boxes you bought last time had them separated, right?” Stiles continues, kneeling down in front of her. She nods, and he leans forward, like telling her a secret. “Well, they found each other. You know Derek and Stiles were friends before that?” she denies, looking impressed and teary. “They were! But they fought a lot. And then they realized they had a lot of things to bond around and they found each other. And now you found them, and they’ll be there with you, always.”

“Won’t they disappear like the other two dolls?” she asks, innocently frowning and pouting.

“No, of course not. I’m sure they had to fight an evil witch and that’s why they couldn’t get back to you. But these two? These two are not going to leave you alone as long as you want them there.”

“Yay!” she says and then her father is taking her hand and guiding her to the front to pay, mouthing a silent ‘thank you’.

“Oh, and this one is on the house. Don’t worry about it.” Derek says.

“But…”

“There’s no worry, seriously.” Derek continues. “We’re just pleased we can make her happy.”

They wave at her a goodbye and Stiles stands up, almost loosing balance. Derek catches him, and he exhales on his ear.

“Be careful.” He mumbles.

“Yeah, yeah. You’ll be here to catch me if I fall, right?” Stiles turns with a small, shy smile, and Derek nods. “Good.”

Derek takes his hand, interlocks their fingers and starts guiding him to the back, where the janitor’s closet is. Ready to go back to their lives and comfortable with the thought that Suzie will have a little piece of them that’ll protect her from whatever-comes-through-her-door. Meanwhile? Meanwhile Derek and Stiles play turns on which one of them gets to be Ken this time. The pack doesn’t really get why they joke around about Barbie and friends, and they seriously don’t want to ask when they start kissing.