#boy oh boy am I a real pest to my followers!' | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

astoldbyaja · 3 months ago

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Fire on Fire -Ch.1 -AU JJK-

Delilah Hawthorne briefly meets a young Nanami Kento during her visit to Tokyo Jujutsu High. This was their first and last conversation before she had to return to America. She returns to Tokyo to continue business with the higher ups that she was supposed to take part in when she was still a teen herself. Unbeknownst to her Nanami Kento, whom she reconnects with, and also still very smitten with her from their first five minute meeting, decides he won't let Delilah slip through his fingers again.

"I'd rather live in your world than live without you in mine." he said breathlessly before crashing his lips into mine.

Warning: Smut, MDNI +18

2006 – Tokyo Jujutsu High

I followed behind my brother, Cassius Hawthorne, silently listening to this teacher, Yaga, discuss the sorcerers in this school. I had never been to Japan before, so my eyes were roaming all over the place. Although my body and remained very still as I moved.

“Many sorcerers, even students are called on missions to kill lower grade curses. It helps them learn and grow their skills for when they’re in the real world.” he explained.

“What are the ranks of the majority of your student body?” Cassius asked.

“The majority are Grade 3, a pretty average rank.” he explained.

“What would my sister and I be ranked if your higher ups ever acknowledged us as sorcerers?” Cassius asked with a low timber like tone.

“You would be Grade 1 and for your sister… due to her technique she would automictically be seen as a Special Grade due to her technique.” he said glancing back at me. I gave a polite smile remaining quiet, my lavender eyes hidden by my black cat eye sunglasses. Yaga was impressed by my abilities, one by one I was asked to show my ability to each grade of cursed spirit all the way up to special grade.

“And your strongest student?” Cassius asked. The older man paused in his walk and so my brother and I did as well.

“There’s only one… he’d no doubt be a special grade.” Yaga merely replied. I could hear chatter coming from the end of the hall. Someone was rounding the corner. Cassius and I looked ahead noticing four students turning the corner. All of them wore uniforms, the three men wearing pants and the one girl wearing a skirt. She’s a brunette with short hair and tired eyes. The tallest was a darker haired boy with hair pulled back and beside him was a boy with snowy white hair and black sunglasses. On the very end, looking disinterested with a blonde-haired boy who looked to be brooding about something.

“That mission was too easy! What were the higher ups thinking!” the whited haired boy asked with a laugh before they all finally saw us. They looked at us curiously and stunned.

“Hey Sensei, new students?” the white-haired boy asked. Cassius and I looked at each other immediately. Was that a stupid question? The higher ups would never allow African-Americans in their organization unless they stood to gain something from it, like the deal we had struck with them. Yaga grunted.

“This is higher up business. This doesn’t concern you.” he said. The blue-eyed boy seemed even more interested now leaning into my brother to look him up and down.

“Oh come on, I’m going to find out eventually. You might as well tell me now!” he swooned. What a pest.

Now his eyes came upon me, and they seemed to sparkle, purple staring at blue and he made a move to lean into me. I stiffened.

“And who is this cutie?” he asked.

“Satoru.” The dark-haired boy warned. Immediately, I felt my brother’s arm wrap around my shoulder and pull me into him, frowning heavily at this Satoru boy.

“Learn some boundaries… I’ll only advice you once: Respect my sister.” he warned. This Satoru snorted as he leaned back.

“Boy you must not know who I am.” he said as if amused. Cassius stared at this Satoru.

“Yaga… is he your special grade?” he asked, causing Yaga to look at him, with a grimace. I knew my brother was treading into unwanted territory, so I kept my eyes down as to let him continue to lead the conversation.

“Let’s continue our tour shall we. Don’t mind my students, Satoru Gojo is harmless.” he said. My brother’s ear twitch, a sign his ears picked up the lie in the man’s voice. Satoru smirked triumphantly and Cassius looked him over once more, already not impressed and his face showed it which made Satoru’s satisfaction drop immediately.

“Yes, let’s continue our tour.” Cassius said and Yaga nodded and looked at the other students.

“Get to class.”

And with that he began to walk on. Satoru Gojo just huffed at my brother and my brother just pulled me along with him. As he did, my eyes lifted to meet the hazel-colored eyes of the blonde boy. He wasn’t looking at me at first, but when he caught my eyes, his entire body stiffened, his eyes widened some and a shade of pink came across his nose. His eyes were… different than any I had ever seen. He seemed to be looking at me, really looking at me. Could he see into my soul? His gaze was strong even for eyes so shocked. My heart fluttered.

I couldn’t help but smile at him before my brother led me from the group.

“Who is that obnoxious punk!” Satoru purposely yelled as we rounded the corner they had come from.

Five days later

There was a small fountain outside the school yard, and I sat alone, reading my book as I waited for my brother to conclude business with Mr. Yaga. Japan was a very beautiful place, definitely felt like I had stepped out of another world. As I read, I noticed a pair of feet slowly creeping up in my vision and I looked up with a gentle, yet curious gaze.

It was him, the blonde boy from that group of students we met a few days ago. I blinked some wondering what it was he could want.

“Uh…” he said. He looked and sounded flustered honestly. I looked him over and gave a polite and curt bow.

“Hello.” I replied kindly and he tensed a bit before looking down at the ground. He seemed to want to say something, but he looked to be having difficulty. Now as if realizing I had greeted him, he jumped as if startled and bowed.

“Hello.” he said awkwardly. He seemed to have a permanent gloomy face. “Uh… um... ‘m Kento… Nanami.”

Suddenly, a form appeared from behind him, a hand gripping his collar and spinning him around. Holding him up was an angry Cassius.

“Hey punk what are you doing bothering my sister!” he snapped. I frowned and stood up.

“Cassius!” I snapped. “Leave the boy alone.”

Cassius squinted pointing in Kento’s face.

“Don’t you think of trying anything on my sister!” he snapped.

“What are you even doing out here?” I asked.

“Came to check on you when I saw this hoodlum approach!” he said. I scoffed.

“I am fine. Please finish with your discussion with Yaga so that we can go.” I said. Cassius huffed, and Kento just frowned at my brother before he was put down and he adjusted his collar. My brother placed two fingers on his own eyes before pointing them at Kento. He then backed away and turned moving back into the school. I approached Kento with an apologetic gaze.

“I’m sorry about him. My brother can be a I bit overprotective. Are you alright, Kento?” I asked. Kento looked at me and tensed, his face seeming to grow a shade of pink, he silently nodded. I smiled and nodded. “That’s good. I’m Delilah Hawthorne. It’s nice to meet you. Was I in your spot?”

I turned to look at the stone seat thinking that’s why he was here.

“Uh n-no I um.” he stuttered, and I tilted my head at him wondering what it was that was wrong with him. He was looking at my hair, eyes all the curls I had pulled up into a high pineapple ponytail. Now he looked at my eyes then my arms and his head were just lulling forward until he was staring at my ankles, eyeing the silver anklet I had on my leg.

“Are you alright?” I asked worriedly and he seemed to still be visibly tensed. He nodded immediately.

“HEY NANAMI!” I could hear the familiar voice of someone who I felt was moderately annoying. Kento immediately frowned as a white-haired form approached behind him wrapping an arm around his neck with a big grin.

“Hey, hitting on the cute new student, very bold of you!” he said which made Kento groan.

“It’s not like that.” he said. I visibly gave a gentle pout.

“Oh really, that’s sad for me then.” I said with a gentle tease, hoping to lighten the mood since the teen was still very tense and uncomfortable. I wonder why he chose to approach me. Maybe he was just trying to be a friendly face since our first meeting with a bit tense. Kento’s eyes widened at my words and Satoru grinned.

“Oh hoo.” he teased.

“Satoru will you stop being a pest.”

I looked around the two boys to see the young girl and the dark-haired boy from before. She looked at me with a polite smile.

“Hello. I’m Shoko Leiri.” she introduced. I smiled at her.

“I’m Delilah Hawthorne. Nice to meet you.” I replied before looking at the last boy who nodded.

“Suguru Geto.” he replied.

“And this handsome devil is Satoru Gojo!” Satoru said loudly. I gave a gentle smile.

“Charmed.” I replied.

“You from America?” Suguru asked. I nodded.

“Yes. Just visiting with my brother Cassius. The higher ups invited us.” I replied.

Satoru scowled.

“So that’s his name huh! The guy was such a jerk.” he said. Suguru scoffed.

“Shut up, you were the one being rude out of nowhere.” he said.

“I was not!” the other boy replied. As Shoko jumped in to add her opinions to the conversation, I just looked at Kento who seemed to be looking away as if annoyed. However, his eyes caught mine and once more I felt a spark shoot up in my body. Why this was I had no idea. I noticed a small smile crack in the corner of Kento’s lips.

“Anyways, so Lilah you going to be attending Jujutsu High? I hear you’re a pretty strong individual! You think you can beat me?” Satoru asked standing over me with a smirk. I looked up at him before looking him over for a second.

“I do not think I could… I know I could.” I said in a matter-of-fact tone. Immediately the blue-eyed boy’s face twitched into an unnerving smile.

“Oh, do you!” he said now leaning forward into me, both our shades were lowering to the bridge of our noses, shimmering purple eyes meeting deep blue orbs.

“You all definitely don’t know who you’re messing with.” he challenged, his smirk evident in his face. I smiled some and gently raised my hand to caress the boy’s cheek. His face leaning into the softness of my touch. I leaned forward, my lips inching into his and he seemed ready to accept whatever it was I was going to do to him. But instead, my cheek pressed into his cheek so that my lips were inches from his ear. I spoke, but my words were muted, and I felt Satoru’s body still as I spoke calmly. His friends watched me, curious of what it was I was doing, and after a few seconds, the blue-eyed boy’s body was slumping onto the ground as if were a puddle.

His glasses were tilting crookedly, and his eyes were now swirling as if he were in a trance, and he started to babble some. Shoko, Suguru and Kento looked completely taken back and I stepped over the puddle known as Satoru Gojo and stood before Kento as the other two went to check on their friend. He approached me for a reason, but it seemed his friends ruined whatever reason he had. Kento looked from his friend to me bewildered, before finally his body seemed to relax. He wasn’t so tense as I expected from standing inches from him. I just smiled at the realization. I may be young, but I knew attraction when I saw it. I gently raised my finger up and placed it into Kento’s cheek. His face showed caution since I had obviously done something to his friend, but his body still remained relaxed. Teasingly I traced little circles into his cheek which was my little way of flirting and the boy’s face turned as red as a tomato.

“Maybe we can hang out sometime before I have to go back to America.” I offered. His eyes widened and his chest looked to tighten before he finally looked away another gloomy look on his face, eyes planted to the ground.

“O-okay.” he said.

“Okay maybe we need to get him to the nurse!” Suguru said.

However, my brother was stomping forward, a look of disappointment on his face. I looked up at him as he approached.

“We’re leaving back home.” Was all he said. I was thrown off by his command knowing that home meant never coming back. I looked down with disappointment before looking up at Kento who seemed utterly hurt. I was not expecting to see such a deep look on his face. But I smiled and he looked at me catching my smile.

“Maybe if we meet each other in another life, we can hang out.” I said. He looked me over some wanting to say something before looking away with a slight groan.

“Promise?” he asked. I could hear the hint of desperation in his tone. I was stunned by his question, not expecting to have to formerly seal my statement away to this boy. I mean he’s only officially met me five minutes ago. But I nodded.

“I promise. Goodbye Kento Nanami.” I replied softly. He winced sadly before giving a small, genuine smile in return.

“Goodbye Lilah- I mean Delilah Hawthorne.” he said. I smiled.

“I like it better when you call me Lilah.” I replied, and his smile widened a bit more before I gave a gentle wave and turned moving around the group of students. Shoko was trying to slap Gojo awake. Odd, I didn’t even use my technique on him.

2018 – Tokyo

I stepped inside the bakery, my cell to my ear.

“Yes, Yaga, I landed yesterday, and I’ll be at the school tomorrow. I plan to relax today before coming in to talk. I am surprised your higher ups wanted to see me again after all this time.” I replied.

“Well, your abilities have been monitored as I am sure you know, and they have… accepted that they should not have let you and your brother walk out on the old terms we made. But things have changed. We would like you to stick around so we can study your technique. You are offered room and board, a debit card that has no spending limit, full immunity from any past or future uses that involve you using your technique.” he explained. I scoffed thinking of that obnoxious boy.

“Past uses? Is he still saying I did something to him?” I asked.

“Well let’s just say he was very vocal about you returning to Japan. First, he was upset, and now he’s giddy to have a rematch. But we’ve made it very clear you are not to ever fight against another sorcerer. No sparing, no training nothing. If you take up arms against any sorcerer or student that is not in clear self-defense it would call for your immediately execution.” he explained clearly. I rolled my eyes.

They could try.

“Understood. Anyways I’m picking up a pastry and will meet you tomorrow to discuss our first order of business.” I replied.

“Okay. See you tomorrow.” he said and hung up. I ordered and grabbed my food before turning to leave the bakery and as I stepped out, my chest hit the broad chest of a man. I blinked heavily looking at tinted green glasses of a tall blonde-haired man. Black sunglasses shined at these glasses. This man was in a formal business suit that was a blue dress shirt underneath a tan blazer with matching slacks and light shoes. Around his neck was polka dotted tie.

“Oh, pardon me.” he said respectfully, his voice deep, smooth and composed. I shook my head.

“No, you’re good, please excuse me.” I replied and now he seemed surprised, and I blinked rapidly looking somewhat off myself as his feet did not move from in front of me. My glasses were pushed up, so my eyes were not showing. He seemed to be looking my face over, and I took a few seconds to do the same. He suddenly shook his head bashfully.

“Uh- I’m sorry you must forgive me; you have a very familiar face.” he said. I leaned back some wondering how that could be when this was only second time in Japan. But I leaned forward just a bit, not enough to invade his space, but enough I could really get a look at him. Blonde hair. Now I raised my fingers to my face to tilt my glasses down so my lavender orbs could shine a bit and now the man’s entire body tensed, eyes slowly widening some.

“L-Lilah Hawthorne?” he asked. My eyes widened on his face now as I slowly smiled, my name rolling off his lips in a way I remember liking.

“Kento Nanami?” I asked nervously and he nodded, now smiling warmly at me. I covered my mouth in shock. Why though? I had only met this man once years ago as a young gloomy teenager and now here we both stood again before each other. Was this fate? I’m not sure.

Maybe it was bound to happen since I was returning to Jujutsu High. I couldn’t stop my finger from gently moving toward his cheek, his jawline looked strong. But I softly placed my pointer finger against his cheek, and I felt it, a jolt of electricity moves through me. He let out a gentle sigh of relief, content. Why did it feel like we were the only ones standing in this town. Buildings and people disappeared around me and I smiled more as he smiled more. I finally began to circle the spot on his cheek from our first ten-minute interaction. Flirting. That’s right.

“I am glad to see you again.” he said warmly snapping me out of my trance and I removed my finger.

“Sorry about that.” I replied, a bit embarrassed, and he just chuckled and shook his head.

“No, it’s alright. I… I can’t believe I’m looking at you again after all this time. You have grown so much.” he said. I smiled and nodded

“Back at you. You’re even more handsome than I remember.” I said sweetly. That familiar shade of pink spread over his nose, and he bit his bottom lip and looked away.

“I-uh- um th-thanks.” he stumbled over his words.

“Hey buddy can we go in?” an annoyed passerby asked. That’s right we’re standing right in the doorway of the bakery. We bashfully stepped aside and apologized and finally looked at each other again.

“What are you doing back here in Japan?” he asked. Even his voice was different, so deep and mature.

“I’m here to work with Yaga and the higher ups. Unfortunately, I can’t say much more on it, but I’ll be here for a while.” I replied noticing his eyes lit up at my words.

“I see. When did you get in?” he asked.

“Yesterday. I don’t have to head back to the school until tomorrow.” I announced and he nodded just staring at my face now with bright eyes.

“I see…” he said his voice trailing off now and now we were both awkwardly staring at each other. Why does this moment feel familiar? We realized we were both just staring at each other before we gave shy chuckles. Kento rubbed the back of his head, and I just looked down at my feet some.

“Well… you seem to be going somewhere important; I don’t want to hold you up.” I replied. Kento seemed to be snapped out of his trance, and he cleared his throat and nodded.

“Actually, I am just running a few errands. Um Lilah, if I’m not being too forward, I was wondering, if you’re not too tired from traveling, but maybe I can take you out some time and show you around Japan once you get settled. I know the last time we met we had… distractions.” he said. My eyes lit up at his offer and I smiled and nodded.

“That would be lovely Kento. I mean I did make a promise that if we saw each other again we would hang out.” I replied remembering the words of our first and last time speaking years ago. Kento nodded his smile never leaving his face.

“I can’t believe I made you promise me. I was such an emo kid back then.” He said. I giggled.

“I just thought you were shy… Here why don’t we swap phones and place our numbers in the other?” I asked pulling me phone from my purse. The tint of pink shade around his face darkened and he nodded.

“Sure.” he replied reaching into his suit pocket and we both handed the other their phones and began to briefly type our numbers in. After a few seconds, we handed each other the phones back.

“Great. I look forward to us picking up from where we left off, even if it was only a five- or ten-minute chat when we were kids.” I said with a soft chuckle, and he agreed.

“Yes agreed… um would it be alright to message you in my free time, only if you’re free too I don’t want to put you out!” he said quickly. Strange, he came off as so professional minutes before we remembered each other and now he seems to be flustered just like when we were kids.

My smile only grew, and I nodded.

“Yes Kento, feel free to message me whenever you have time.” I said gently raising my hand to wave my goodbye. “Until later, Kento.” I gave a gentle curt bow of my head.

He returned the gesture with a warm smile.

“Until later, Delilah.”

#jjk nanami #nanami kento #jujutsu kaisen #jujitsu kaisen AU #jujutsu nanami #jujutsu kaisen nanami #nanami fluff #blackfemaleoc #Nanami Kento x BlackfemaleOC #nanami smut #jjk smut #smut

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angsty-violet · 11 months ago

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Deviant Thoughts

I filled this for an anonymous prompt on the KPTS kinkmeme.

“Kinn looks amazing in that suit.” God, could Big be any more absurd? Aim a little lower, buddy, because it ain’t happening.

“Big’s ass looks amazing in those pants.” Finally, some realism, and from Ken of all people.

“We’ve got five shipments coming in in the next few weeks. Going to have to be on top of that.” Nothing but work, work, work from Golden Boy Kinn.

“Those new recruits are basically useless. It’ll take weeks, possibly months, to get them anywhere near ready.” Well, that could be a good in, and from Chan of all people.

“We’re going to need to be careful with the Russians,” Don said.

Vegas could feel his temper starting to rise. He continued to scroll through each set of thoughts, trying to distract himself from the stupidity of that man.

“God, I want a nap.

“I am starving. They never give us anything real to eat.

“I could totally bludgeon that Italian dick with my bare hands. Just crack his skull open and spill his brains all over the floor.”

“Man, my shoulder hurts.”

Wait, what? Vegas backtracked for a minute. Who had thought about bludgeoning Don? He rescanned the thoughts, focusing on each face in turn. Finally, he found the one with the violence.

“Could he be any more conceited? I just want to make him beg and scream for mercy. I want to force him to beg for death. Stupid bastard.”

Was that Pete?!

Not sweet little, blushed when he was flirted with, Pete!

Vegas smirked. Oh, this was going to be fun.

He lingered after the meeting. Normally, he liked to mess with Kinn. Rile him up, fuck with his mind and then take his leave before he really explodes. However, Vegas followed Pete instead of following Kinn to his office to start messing with him.

He was walking back toward Khun’s floor, and Vegas knew that if he wanted to talk to Pete, he would have to get to him before Khun saw him. So, he jogged to catch up.

“Hey, Pete!”

Pete halted and eyed Vegas warily. Then he pasted on that fake smile he did so well.

“Can I help you, Khun Vegas?”

God, he wanted to mess with him so badly. Vegas smiled at him.

“I just wanted to see how you were, Pete. You seem to be a little frustrated and a little on edge.”

Pete’s eyes narrowed, and he looked at Vegas, really looked at him. Vegas knew that most of the main family considered him a pest. He was the eldest son of the minor family. Only good for torture and interrogation. Because of that, their eyes tended to just skim past him. Which was fine with Vegas. He liked flying under the radar. Occasionally, one of them would see him, for real, and then Vegas had them.

Like now, he knew that Pete was intrigued. He didn’t do it during conversations very often because it tended to confuse him, but he skimmed Pete’s thoughts.

“Why is he talking to me? I can barely control myself. If I could tear that expensive shirt off him and get away with it, I’d be all over him. I’d show him who’s really boss and leave my mark all over that lovely skin. Play with his nipples until he’s wet and helpless.”

“I’m fine, Khun Vegas.”

Vegas smirked and stepped a little closer, thrusting his chest forward. Pete’s eyes flicked to the nipples in question and back to Vegas’ face, but he didn’t back down.

“Shame, for a moment there, you almost seemed interesting.”

“Please, please leave. I don’t know how long I can stand this without making a huge mistake. God, he’s so beautiful. Those cheekbones and that smirk. I bet his cock is big. I bet it feels so good. I bet he makes all of Kinn’s twinks his pets. They’re probably putty in those strong, capable hands. If I could kill them all just to get a taste of him, I would.”

“Well, I’m not.”

Vegas smirked since Pete seemed to like it so much and turned around. “I’ll see you later, pet. Oh, sorry, I mean Pete.”

“Fuuuuck.”

Vegas made sure to put an extra bit of saunter into his hips as he walked away. He knew the pants were ridiculously tight and would show off absolutely everything. Vegas couldn’t wait until the next meeting.

“Okay, keep it cool. Just take deep breaths. You get through this meeting, and tomorrow’s your day off. You just need to not think about Vegas. Not about his gorgeous hands. Or his skill at torture. Or that large cock that would feel so good inside of you. It would fill every empty space and….no, stop, fuck. You moron, he’s the enemy.”

It was all Vegas could do to listen to the meeting. Whenever he tried to focus on what Kinn was saying, his mind would wander back to Pete’s thoughts. Vegas wasn’t sure what was causing Pete to have all of these thoughts, but he would have fun with it.

Today, he had dressed in his tightest pants and shirt. The shirt was a lacy, semi-translucent thing that stuck to his nipples. It was probably the sluttiest thing he owned, but he rarely wore it. Not enough people would appreciate the taunt and tease of barely seeing something. But Vegas had a feeling Pete would.

Kinn was blathering on about duty and some crap, so Vegas was free to let his mind wander over to his new favorite plaything.

“Oh, why is he wearing that shirt? His nipples, dear God, his nipples. How am I supposed to focus when they’re on display? How am I supposed to do my job when that pretty chest is right there for the taking? Stupid, slutty, Vegas.”

Oh, Vegas was a slut? Who was fantasizing about the enemy?

Vegas made sure to linger and then dropped his pen right in front of Pete. He watched as Pete’s eyes looked down his V-neck and smirked.

“He is right there, being a whore, and I can’t do anything? How is this fair? He has to be doing this on purpose. He has to be fucking with me. Stupid boy. I am going to bend him over this table if he doesn’t leave. Okay, take deep breaths. Don’t let anyone know how he makes you feel, least of all him.”

“Well, I’d love to stay and chat, but I have to be going. Don’t worry though, I’ll be back.”

“How has no one ever spanked him? How has no one turned him over their laps and paddled that misbehaving little ass until he apologized and begged for mercy? If I could get away with it, I’d force him to take hit after hit. I wouldn’t stop until he was a desperate, sobbing, helpless little mess.”

Vegas was forced to cross his legs to hide his slight hardness. Normally, he liked to do the spanking, but the very detailed image of him across Pete’s knees was turning him on so much he could hardly stand it.

Pete’s face never seemed to change during these little fantasies. He could be imagining forcing Vegas to take his cock for hours at a time, and his expression never lost that blank look.

Vegas was having the absolute best time fucking with Pete. Suddenly, the meetings he had spent so long dreading were the highlight of his day. He could also tell that Pete was starting to get suspicious of something. That suited Vegas just fine. He couldn’t wait to fuck with Pete even more. He had worn a suspiciously inconspicuous white t-shirt. Something that normally he wouldn’t be caught dead in. However, today was a special occasion, and this one would work the best. It was finally time to fulfill one of Pete’s regular fantasies.

Vegas had been waiting nearly a week and a half for a meeting to be held outside over by the sprinklers. He’d been planning it since he had heard Pete’s off-hand thought about seeing him soaking wet. It had taken some planning, but he knew exactly when the sprinklers would turn on.

It was easy to pretend he had just wandered off because he was nosy. It didn’t take any time to be in the middle of them when they went off. He made an excellent show of anger and upset. Playing at having not done it on purpose and being very put out. However, it was all worth it when he met Pete’s eyes and skimmed his thoughts.

“Why the fuck is he wet? He’s literally sopping wet. That shouldn’t be a real thing in life?! I am going to get him for this.”

“Okay, that’s it,” was all Vegas heard before being slammed face-first against a wall. A large hand pressed against the back of his neck, and another grabbed both of his hands, pinning them to the small of his back. He felt warm breath against his ear.

“I don’t know what you are or how you’re figuring out what I’m thinking, but I am done with having my thoughts read.”

Vegas squirmed in the hold and pressed his ass back against the hard cock. “Come on, Pete. You can’t tell me you don’t enjoy someone finally noticing you. That someone knows what and how you feel. The real you underneath all those fake smiles.”

Pete’s hand moved from the back of Vegas’ neck to the front, and he squeezed. “I knew it was something like that. It was all a little too convenient. The clothes, the flirting, you somehow ending up drenched in water. That was all too close to what I was thinking about.”

Vegas moaned as the hand tightened. His vision was starting to go blurry around the edges, and it was so turned on that he could barely think. The pressure just slightly let up, and he took a deep breath and coughed.

“I should hurt you for invading my privacy like that,” Pete muttered darkly.

“Then do it. Punish me for being bad, show me who’s boss. Or would you rather I be the one to take control instead? Would you rather it be me that takes and gives you nothing? Turn you into my helpless little pet.”

“No, I don’t think so.”

Pete started steering Vegas out of the building and toward his bike. He never let that tight grip go on Vegas’ neck, and Vegas never protested the rough treatment. He was really enjoying being thrown around like a ragdoll.

Pete pushed him toward the bike. “Drive, I’ll ride, and you’re going to take us to a nice hotel where no one knows who you are.”

Vegas grinned in delight and climbed onto the bike. Pete got behind him and put his arms around Vegas’ waist tightly.

“Better hurry. I’m starting to grow impatient.”

Vegas let out a shaky breath, and then they were speeding off.

The hotel was nice, but Pete had no issue letting Vegas put down his credit card. That staff didn’t even blink at Pete’s possessive grip on Vegas.

Pete took both keys from them and steered Vegas toward the elevator. Vegas tried not to squirm too much as he was walked over.

“In,” Pete ordered him.

Vegas complied, entering the hotel room. He thought of skimming Pete’s thoughts again just to get a glimpse of what the man had in store for him, but then he thought better of it. He wanted this to be a surprise, and he didn’t want to actually upset Pete. At least not when they were about to be naked together.

“Clothes off. Let’s see all of those things you’ve spent the last few weeks taunting me with. Maybe if you behave well enough, I’ll even let you top me. But I bet a slut like you likes getting fucked even more than to top.”

Vegas stripped out of his clothes quickly. He was way too turned on to try to turn it into a show. Pete inspected him with a careful eye, and Vegas bit back a whimper.

“Very nice. I can see why all of Kinn’s twink hookers thought you were worth risking their lives. I’m not them. You can’t skim my thoughts and get away with it. Speaking of which, tonight, if I catch you having a peak, I’m going to get up and leave you here, no matter what condition you’re in. Do you understand me?”

“Yes,” Vegas breathed out. “I understand.”

“I’m glad, on the bed, on your back, legs apart. I want you to hold still, but feel free to be loud if you want to.”

Vegas did as he was told. He laid down and spread his legs. Pete settled between them and looked down at Vegas. He inspected him for a moment and then bent over, placing his mouth on the body part that had been torturing him for weeks. Vegas moaned at the feeling of Pete’s teeth scraping against his right nipple but stayed still. Pete’s hand tweaked the left, and Vegas took several deep, shaky breaths in a row. Pete pulled back from him.

“Whore,” he muttered.

Pete was in no mood for a long, drawn-out prep, and he also wasn’t in the mood to be fingered. He had heard stories from a few of the prostitutes at Vegas’ best skill. Pete was determined to feel it in action. He adjusted his position on the bed so his ass was right in front of Vegas’ face.

“Go on then, show me your favorite skill. I’ve heard stories. If you do a good enough job, you’ll get to fuck me. If you don’t, well then, I guess you’re in for a long, lonely night.”

Vegas ate ass like he was in the ass-eating Olympics and determined to get gold. Pete could understand why all those men would throw away Kinn when they had Vegas doing this to them each night.

“Oh, you can be a good boy, can’t you? You can do as you’re told and please your partner, not just tease.”

Vegas moaned against Pete’s hole. Pete wanted to continue this treatment, but he was impatient for the next step. It had been a long, frustrating few weeks with Vegas constantly tormenting and turning him on. It was time to get what he was owed from the tease.

Pete pulled back, ignoring Vegas’ whines. He leaned over the bed and, retrieved the bag he had placed there earlier and removed a condom and a small packet of travel lube. Then he turned around so he was facing Vegas.

Vegas was looking at him up through his eyelashes, and Pete couldn’t resist. He slapped him across the face, delighting in the bloom of bruise on Vegas’ cheek.

“Pete,” he whined softly.

“I know, baby. Let me get you ready.” Pete rolled the condom onto Vegas, watching as he fought to keep still. Then he slicked him up with the lube. He didn’t care for any more prep and straddled Vegas’ hips.

“You want it?”

Vegas bit his lip and nodded.

“No, use your words Vegas. Tell me what you want.”

“Want to fuck you.”

Pete leaned over, feeling mean. “Yeah, that’s what you want?”

“Please, Pete, yes.”

“Alright then,” and Pete sunk down on his cock. Vegas threw his head back and moaned loudly. Pete moved until Vegas was all the way inside of him and then stopped. They were both panting, and Pete was reveling in the stretch and burn.

“I should’ve done this to you years ago. I should’ve bent you over a meeting table and fucked you. Had you fuck me. Put you into every imaginable position until we were so tangled in each other it could never come undone.”

Pete started to rock gently, and Vegas’ hands clenched in the bedsheets, not sure what he could do with them. Pete picked one of them up and guided it to his back.

“You can touch.”

Given permission, Vegas’ hands roamed all over his body. His front, his back, up and down his side, cataloging everything he found there. Pete found his rhythm and started riding Vegas. He was right about the big cock filling him up so well.

“Oh, you’re good. You feel so good inside me. I should keep you. Just not let you go back. Keep you tucked away in a house somewhere like you do with all of Kinn’s throwaways.”

Vegas’ hands dug in, and Pete tossed back his head, moaning in delight at the pleasure-pain contrast. He delighted in it.

Pete could feel his orgasm starting to rise, but he didn’t want to come before being filled up. That was his favorite part.

“Vegas?”

Vegas looked up at him.

“Will you come for me, sweet boy?”

Vegas whined, long and high, and Pete felt the warmth inside of him. He continued to ride Vegas, not letting him get away from the overstimulation.

Pete could tell that he wasn’t going to get there from just the fucking, so he guided one of Vegas’ hands to his cock. Vegas took the initiative and started stroking him. His other hand came up to play with Pete’s balls, which were hanging low and heavy.

“That’s it, baby. There you go, darling. Just like that.”

It was enough to get him over that edge, and when he clamped down during his orgasm, Vegas let out the most pathetic whimper Pete had ever heard in his entire life. Pete cooed condescendingly at him. He was starting to become oversensitive, so Pete gently lifted himself off Vegas and rolled over. He heard Vegas deal with the condom while he fetched a towel from the bathroom.

Pete cleaned both of them and then lay down on the bed.

“Come here, right now.”

Vegas blinked, looking a little vulnerable and then scooted closer. Pete placed a possessive arm around his waist and kissed his cheek.

“If you’re gone in the morning, I’m going to hunt you down. Do you believe me? You can peek if you don’t.”

Vegas looked up at him and leaned over for their first kiss. Pete met him and kissed him soundly.

“Yeah, I understand.”

#kinnporche the series #vegaspete #vegas theerapanyakul #pete saengtham #vegas x pete

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nancywheelxr · 4 years ago

Text

based on yet another genius conversation @ptadadwenkexing and i had that basically started with: “what if Ye Baiyi adopted Wen Kexing after his parents died?” and then spiraled from there

in a city sorrow built

[before]

The world is a foggy forest.

Or, perhaps, a murky swamp, but Zhen Yan has never seen a swamp before, he doesn’t think. All he knows is that his head feels stuffy and it hurts so much. Like he’s on fire. Like when he tripped and skinned his knee except it’s burning everywhere.

When did he skin his–

He can’t think, it’s so hot in here, and it hurts, and–

There are voices around him. Is the Ghost King back? Anger sparks somewhere beneath the hurt, but fear does too, so much of it, and Zhen Yan wants his mom, wants to go home, wants–

The arms holding him shift and even through the haze, he curls up further, fingers grasping uselessly at robes. “Luo-yi,” he tries to say, feeling tears gathering up in his eyes– she can’t leave too, she can’t, please, don’t leave him alone, please–

“Shhhh,” her voice comes from above, a finger sweeping over his brow even as he’s passed to another set of arms, “it’ll be okay, you won’t remember this.”

“And you think he’ll thank you for that?” This voice, Zhen Yan doesn’t recognize, it sounds cold and harsh, and he wants to push away, but his body feels heavy and so far away, and thinking too hard hurts, so he can’t do anything, except–

The next time he surfaces, he no longer feels like he’s burning: instead, he’s terribly cold.

“ – no place for a child,” that same voice from before is saying, and Zhen Yan still hates it, still wants his mom, his dad, even Luo-yi, but he’s so cold– he’ll, he’ll– something, he’ll do something, later, he will, but now, he can only burrow further into this person’s arms, seeking any warmth. The hold on him tightens, something is draped over his shoulders. “Hey, are you awake, kid?”

Yes, and I’ll kill you, you’ll see– the pain spikes again, and he’s dragged back into the darkness.

“ – you think you can just replace him?!”

“What did you want me to do? Leave the child in that place?”

“How is bringing him to this damned place any better? The great Sword Immortal could not think of anywhere else?”

“Please, you two, you’ll wake the boy–”

“The child is– his parents died for him, it’s my responsibility–”

“Is it? Or is it your guilt?”

A hand presses to his forehead.

“The fever has gone down,” a new voice says quietly, kinder and softer than the first two from before, and Zhen Yan leans into the touch.

Mom, is it you? Did you come back for me?

It’s not. She didn’t. When he wakes up again, the fog in his mind is nearly gone.

The winter of his memories is nearly gone, snow melted into a spring river. It’s still there.

He did it.

It’s still there.

In the morning, he wakes up with the sun filtering in through the window, brighter than he’s ever seen it. It lights up the room he’s in, allowing him to see how sparsely furnished it is– just the bed he’s in, a desk by the window with a chair, and a large sword resting in a shadowed corner. Over the chair, a white over robe is draped and on the desk, he notices with staggering relief his jade hairpin.

The key is safe.

How long has he been here? He doesn’t remember much after drinking the water Luo-yi gave him. Had he thrown it all up? He tried later that night, but then– what? Oh, he thinks he might have thrown up blood too, that’s probably not very good--

The door slides open.

He means to pretend to be asleep, but the movement startles him, and the man by the door freezes, looking for all the world like he’d rather be anywhere else. The man doesn’t look threatening, with a water basin in his hand, but the little time he’s spent in the Ghost Valley has already taught him not to trust appearances.

The man sighs, unsticking from the doorway to set the basin at the table. His movements are slow and precise, clearly telegraphed before moving, and when he finally turns to face the bed, his face is tired, weary like Luo-yi’s only ever was that first night when she was cleaning up blood from his face.

“Alright, what’s your name, then?”

Something terrible caves in his chest, breaking off jagged edges, sharp and cutting, and the words all turn to ash in his mouth. What is his name? His mom told him to never use the Zhen surname again, didn’t she? And she– now, he’s–

Besides, it feels very far away, that life. Maybe Zhen Yan should stay with that boy in his memories who had a mother and a father that were all alive and well. Maybe–

“Aiya, why are you crying,” the man says, taking a step towards the bed but stopping when that only seems to make things worse, “if I was going to hurt you, do you think I’d waste my time taking care of you first? Little Idiot, did you forget your own name? That’s a real concern, so you have to tell me the truth.”

“I’m not an idiot!” It rushes out of his mouth before he can stop himself, but surprisingly, along with the man’s awkward blundering, it makes him feel a bit better. “And of course I know my name! It’s– it’s– Wen Kexing!”

There. Mom, is that okay? I’m sorry, I’m listening to you now, see?

The man does not look like he believes him. “Wen Kexing, sure. How much do you remember, then?”

Wen Kexing. It sounds foreign. Unfamiliar. But not– not bad? He could– it sounds like someone he could be. Wen Kexing. Still the same characters, still him, just– just pieced together a little different. Yes, just different. “Who are you? Where am I? Why did you bring me here? What do you want?”

Another sigh. “You’re going to be a pest, I can tell,” the man scowls, shaking a finger in his direction, “so disrespectful! I’m letting it go this time, but see if I won’t have you kneeling outside to learn some manners in the future.”

He– Wen Kexing scowls right back. “I’ll bite you!”

While he had been prepared to take a hit for that, the only thing the man does is snort. “Silly boy, do you think you are a little ghoul? Now, now, come on, what do you remember?”

Too much. Not enough. Wen Kexing doesn’t know how to answer that. He remembers his dad killing himself and he remembers his mom lying on the ground. He remembers screaming until his throat gave out and he remembers the Ghost King laughing. He remembers– another boy? He doesn’t know what his mother looked like smiling or how his father called him, but he remembers how blood tastes on his tongue.

What do you remember?

Tears are welling up again and Luo-yi told him once not to cry in front of other people, but everything is so terrible, he just wants to curl up under the blankets and not wake up again, and, and–

“Oi, little ghost, don't start crying again,” the man sounds a little panicked even if his face doesn't really show it, but now that he has started, Wen Kexing can't stop crying, choking out sobs so much, he can barely breathe. A hand falls on his shoulder over the blankets, and he looks up to find the man is kneeling by the bed now, looking very uncomfortable, “alright, if I tell you my name, will you stop crying? My name is Ye Baiyi.”

Wen Kexing hiccups. “Where's Luo-yi?”

“At the Ghost Valley with the other ghosts,” Ye Baiyi says, voice kinder than before, “she gave you to me to get you out of that damned place.”

“Why?”

“Because that place is no place for children, not even rude little ghosts.”

“Why?”

“Because– ai, is that the only word you know? Come on, if you're well enough to be a pest, you're well enough to get out of bed to eat.”

“I could be dying,” Wen Kexing sniffs, slowly crawling out from his nest of blankets. There is a lot he wants to ask, but this man doesn't seem to be bad, even if he's rude. Besides, food would be nice. He pokes his head out, glaring. “No funny business, or I'll really bite you.”

Ye Baiyi laughs. "Such a fierce little ghost,” he allows Wen Kexing to get to his feet on his own and doesn’t try to get any closer, only gesturing for him to follow, “put on that robe too, it’s cold up here and there’s people you need to meet after you eat. Well, one person, but she’ll come around later too.”

If they’re going outside later, maybe Wen Kexing could try sneaking out. If this really isn’t the Ghost Valley, then– then, maybe he could run away. To somewhere. He doesn’t know yet, he’ll figure out the details later.

But food first, he really is hungry.

***

[now]

The inn is bustling with people, the happy chatter reaching even the top of the stairs, and the sun is shining brightly outside– they should go out again today, Wen Kexing decides, just for the fun of it, to hell with the Scorpion! Maybe the market?

“A-Xu, how about it, let’s go to the market again today,” he’s saying, half-formed plans to laze around in the sun bringing a genuine smile to his face– when he spots him. “Oh, shit.”

Zhou Zishu immediately starts scanning their surroundings, which is so sweet, Wen Kexing will definitely swoon later when he’s not in a crisis. “What? What did you see?”

“Nothing, nothing,” he tries to backtrack, tugging at Zhou Zishu’s arm to drag him back to their rooms. Maybe, if he’s very luck, Ye Baiyi has not seen them yet. Could they escape through the window? It’s not very high, he doesn’t think. “A-Xu, A-Xu, I’ve just remembered, let’s go back upstairs, I don’t feel so well–”

“Lao Wen, what–”

“Wen Kexing, you lunatic, stop right there!”

“Wait, who’s that–”

“No one, A-Xu, no one,” he closes the door behind them, whirling around to grin his most innocent grin, the one that had Rong-furen patting his head and slipping him an extra mooncake, “A-Xu, what would you do if I told you to jump out that window with me?”

“What,” Zhou Zishu says, eyebrows going up, up, up, as he smirks, “are you telling me there’s someone Sword Immortal Wen is afraid of?”

On one hand, they don’t have time to waste squabbling about unimportant things like this when Ye Baiyi has alread caught sight of him. On the other hand, that is just not something he can let stand– “as if! That old man wishes– !”

Their time runs out: the door is thrown open with no ceremony and Wen Kexing sighs. Honestly, the drama. “Wen Kexing!” Ye Baiyi points a finger at him, not even sparing Zhou Zishu a look, narrowing his eyes, “how many times have I told you to stop calling yourself the Sword Immortal?!”

He scowls. “Old man,” he starts, thinks better of it, amends with a winning smile, “shifu, I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Unfortunately, he is betrayed by his own soulmate: “are you telling me,” Zhou Zishu drawls, “you are not the Sword Immortal, Lao Wen?”

“A-Xu! Don’t laugh at me, your skepticism is very hurtful!”

“So you have some brains, unlike the people downstairs who bought into his bullshit,” Ye Baiyi seems to take stock of Zhou Zishu, and Wen Kexing feels irrationally nervous for no good reason– first of all, his A-Xu is literally perfect, so there’s nothing for Ye Baiyi to bitch about, and second of all, who cares what the Old Man thinks? “Who are you, anyway? Why are you running around with that pest in your state?”

“Excuse me, who are you calling– wait, what state? A-Xu?”

“Maybe we should all sit down,” Zhou Zishu gestures to the small table, looking uncharacteristically surprised.

When he came down the mountain earlier that month, Wen Kexing had only meant to look into why people were suddenly trying to blame Luo-yi for their mess and maybe, if he were lucky, watch the Five Lakes Alliance burn themselves to the ground, get his revenge without even lifting a finger– how fortunate is that? But now things are a lot messier, he still hasn’t figured out how much of his recent dreams are real or not, how truly entwined his life is with Zhou Zishu’s. Had they truly met as children?

It’ll have to wait. Maybe Ye Baiyi will know something, he’ll annoy it out of him later. His head is beginning to ache again, but it’s fine, let them just have tea first– now that he thinks about it, who knows, maybe the Old Man can heal Zhou Zishu’s old injury?

Just in case, Wen Kexing pours the tea for him, beaming away any suspicion.

#woh #word of honor fic #word of honor #shl #tyk #shan he ling #tian ya ke #faraway wanderers #wenzhou #wen kexing #ye baiyi #wenzhou fanfic #mine #woh tag #wenzhou tag

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pocketramblr · 4 years ago

Text

how his hair do that, 5 options

the following is a crack fanfic in five parts, each section on the same premise but not same continuity. also, very spoilerish

bnha manga spoilers below! very recent leaks below! very spoilery!

Better than a charcoal milkshake v 1

--------

When the heroes first attacked, alarms blaring, compound up in chaos, Dabi snuck away. He let the others pour out of the doors and down the stairs, and crept backwards, turning and running once he was certain no one would notice him.

Not that it would matter much if he did, but why waste the energy on killing them too? He’d need all his firepower today.

Dabi tore through the halls to his room, making it there and slapping his card against the scanner. No time to lose, not when he knew he needed to take care of a few more things before locating where Endeavor was in this heroes’ mission.

He kicked open his bathroom door, hands occupied with carefully pulling the black wig off his head- snagging that on his staples was just the worst, and he couldn’t have blood messing this up today.

Not yet, at least.

Under the bathroom cabinet he grabbed the bag of powery charcoal. It was supposed to be used for some beauty purpose or another, something about enriching hair that didn’t even work- but it would work to darken his white locks.

He poured it on, barely bothering to lean over the sink and keep it from going everywhere. As a final test, he once more wet a bit of it, the color seeping from the hair as it dripped.

He already knew it would work, that’s why he had intercepted so much of it before the quirk cultists could offer it to Toga or Hawks or whoever, but his heart was racing with both nerves and pure excitement.

Finally. The day he’d burn it all down, and make them see why.

He left his door open as he ran back out into the hallway, making a beeline for where he left Hawks. First things first, take care of that, then find Endeavor.

--------

Better than a charcoal milkshake v 2

--------

“Hey, put me down by that camping supplies store. And Skeptic too.” Dabi ordered, surveying the carnage of Jakku and glancing over at the man hunched over his laptop.

Said man looped up sharply at that, frowning and spitting that he wasn’t going to do that or something.

Dabi didn’t really pay attention to that.

“Where?” Gigantomachia asked, still rumbling forward towards whatever he smelled. Two masters or something.

Compress cleared his throat and translated for the currently blinded giant. “It’s at 4:05 o’clock, I’d say thirty feet forward.” He then looked over at Dabi, mask as unsettling as any of them. “You’ll be carefull too, on your personal mission?”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Dabi waved him off, snagging Skeptic by the back of his shirt and tugging as Machia scooped them up and placed them on the pavement.

He ran inside the evacuated store, mercifully empty and not decayed, and started looking for the bags of charcoal.

When he found one, he tore it open. Charcoal fell to the floor, and he ground his boot down into it.

“What…” Skeptic seemed without words, for once. Good.

Dabi tore off his black wig, tossing it aside. He wouldn’t need it anymore.

“You wear a wig??”

“Yeah.” He started to scoop up handfuls of the charcoal, rubbing it into his hair. “Hey, go grab me some water, and then go set up the cameras. We got a show to put on.”

--------

Stinky dumpster boy

--------

“But my good name?” He sneered the word and all it implied in the world of false heroes, “is Todoroki Touya.”

With that, he dumped the water over his head, and it streamed down over his face, filthy.

The dirty water, practically mud, stung the places on his face where his skin was barely stapled together, and Dabi was reminded of why he didn’t bother with showers anymore- the pain.

But now his true colors- literally- were revealed and it was all worth it. All the truth was out, and the truth had always hurt him.

Shoto, who seemed to be trying to juggle first aid on like, five different people with two random heroes he didn’t know next to him, gaped.

“Come on, I know my face has changed, but my own family should still be able to recognize me, yeah? But you never did. You never did, Todoroki Shoto.”

Dabi suddenly found himself encased in ice.

Ah, this again.

“Yumi’s is colder.”

Shoto’s jaw dropped, then he glared. “Stand back.” He said as he stood up. “He just dunked water on his head, to cool him off I bet. If he is Touya, his body never could handle his own heat. If he’s not… those burns come from somewhere at least.”

Ok, now Dabi was offended.

“What do you mean, ‘if I’m not’?” he demanded. “I just revealed my white hair? I know that’s what the picture on my shrine looks like, you never even looked at that?”

“How do you even know what your shrine looks like?” Shoto sounded dangerously close to judgmental for a little brother who was probably as emo as Dabi had been at his age. “And wait, that cup of water was supposed to wash out your hair? What, do you never bathe or something?”

Ok, now Dabi was really offended.

“Of course I bathe! I just have to sponge bath, because I don’t know if you’ve noticed from having your own scars, but when they take up most of your body and are killing you they end up controlling a lot of your life!”

Ugh, asking him if he didn’t bathe. He’d understand that asked of Shigaraki, sure, but him? Shoto had gotten close enough to smell him, at least.

“Um, sorry to interrupt,” the hero in blue, the one that was tending to Eraserhead, raised his hands. “But uh… do you want some help with that?”

“I’m fine, don’t want to cool him off too much so he can fight longer.” Shoto shook his head.

“I was talking to him.”

“Oh.”

“What?”

The hero waved his hand, bubble of water pulling up from the ground. Then he pointed to his own head. “I can take care of that? At the very least it’ll be cleaned out and um, whatever color it should be?”

Dabi stared at him. Shoto stared at him. The other hero in green stared at him, and the one who’d offered help started to sweat noticebly.

“Eh, sure, whatever.”

The hero nodded, and the bubble of water floated over to him, disappearing in his hair.

The bubble floated out a couple of time, murky brown and black with ash, dirt, oil, blood, anything else he’d never thought about too much. It would wring itself thin, much dropping, and return to cleaning.

Finally, his hair was mostly white and thoroughly soaked.

“Thanks.” He called over.

“Yeah.” The hero answered, still frantically trying to help Eraserhead with his free hand, which he’d gone back too as soon as he thought Dabi was distracted. Buying time.

The other hero was on his fourth facepalm.

Shoto just looked contemplative.

Endeavor, one of the ones receiving treatment, sat up but looked like he was going to pass out.

Well all right then. Time to really start- the hair snafu didn’t matter. They were all going to die that day anyway.

--------

Weirdest commercial I’ve ever been in.

--------

“We’ll be dancing in hell together, Todoroki Enji.” Dabi finished his speech with a sneer.

The watching heroes were all stunned silent, mouths open, eyes wide. The revelation must be sending them, like it would all who were watching Skeptic’s broadcast. This would burn it all down, perfect.

“I don’t understand…” Enji managed to say, spitting out a bit of blood.

“What, you don’t understand how I survived, or how I hate you so much I’d hurt innocent people over it? Because that second part is exactly what you did, take out all that self-loathing and insecurity, rage at your shortcomings and condemn children not born yet to them. Guess it’s a family trait.”

“No, not that,” He waved a hand. “I mean, I totally get how you’re a wreck, even if all of your other siblings managed to not become mass murders, I mean- I don’t understand, how did that pint of water wash out all of your hair dye? Aren’t you better funded after the Deika merger, can’t you afford proper hair coloring?”

“I was also wondering that.” Shoto admitted.

“Same.” The hero in blue nodded. The hero in green facepalmed.

“Water?” Dabi repeated, then looked at the can he’d tossed aside. “Oh, no. This isn’t water- it’s a momento of the only true hero.” He bent down, picking up the can and studying the image on it.

“Stain was right, you know.” He mused. “About hero society being rotten. So rotton, so full of fakes, that there was only one that deserved the title. He just got the wrong hero, guessing All Might.” Dabi snorted at the very idea. “No, the only real one, the pure one, the one that defines heroism, the only one with a kill count higher than me- for all the dear old man and his biggest fan Hawks tried, of course- is Wash.”

“… Wash?” Shoto cocked his head. “Wait, like, Wash, Wash?”

“The one and only. That’s how this Official Wash’s Hair Washing Serum, the only product that can wash out all dirt, dye, and any other kind of grime, in just one go.” He shook the can around so they could see. “What, you all thought I could just magically lighten my hair from black to white in the space of one fight?”

“No,” Shoto said, like a liar, and then he threw a glacier at Dabi, and the fight was on in earnest.

--------

Old news

--------

“And now you’ll see who I really am, who you’ve created.” Dabi poured the bleach over his head, giving it a moment to sink into the hair before he shook it out, grinning wide enough to tear his staples.

The heroes on the ground and the few tending to them stared in shock.

Then Shoto gasped.

“Hawks?”

“What? Where?” Dabi whirled around, looked up, because he was really sure he had managed to make sure that pest wouldn’t be flying or fighting again, but well… he’d thought that once before and been wrong then.

“No, you- you’re Hawks, you dye your hair black when its in Dabi mode, and its that beachy yellow blond in Hawks mode.” Shoto nodded to himself.

Blond? Dabi tugged at a lock of hair, and huh. It did seem more yellow than white.

“How could he be Hawks?” The hero in green demanded incredulously, before the hero in blue grabbed his arm and pulled it back to holding down Eraserhead for bandaging.

“The burns and staples are part of the disguise,” Shoto explained. “Fake, and misdirection. You were trained from young childhood to be a hero, sent to join AfO and the league as a spy, where you gained a fire quirk and decided to switch to the villains’ side because you hated the life you were forced into.”

Dabi stared at him.

Shoto stared back.

Enji stared at both of them.

“How are you so smart and so stupid at the same time?” Slipped from chapped, burnt lips.

Shoto looked offended at that.

“I mean, you’re half right, yes that’s what up with Hawks, yes he was sent as a spy, but I knew and I killed him at the compound. And not, like, in a metaphorical way.” He added when he saw something spark in Shoto’s eyes. “Literally. I’m not him. He is completely separate person and body than me and I totally literally killed him.” Or like. Close enough. “And like, thirty other people who were completely innocent.”

Or close enough, he really didn’t bother to keep track, but thirty sounded like a big number. Especially of murders.

“So then who are you?” Shoto asked.

“What, you don’t recognize me, little brother?” He almost growled it, feeling very tired of this all of a sudden.

“Little brother?” Shoto repeated, eyes wide, then narrowing. “Wait, how…”

“Oh not again.” Enji muttered.

“Not again?” Dabi asked. “Wait, you actually managed to drive one of the others to this too? And cover it up? Man, Enji, you’re more rotten than even I knew then!”

“One of the others?” Shoto looked around wildly. “What are you talking about?”

“I was talking about how Shigaraki also randomly showed up and called a first year student “little brother”.” Enji looked back over at Dabi. “What were you talking about?”

“Shigaraki did what?” The pyro looked over his shoulder, finding the villain looking absolutely stoned on the ground, almost as vacant as some of the unconscious heroes, with a curly haired student laying bloodied nearby, staring up at him. “Wait, which student is his little brother?”

“Midoriya, apparently.” Shoto shrugged.

“Midoriya?” Dabi almost choked on the name. “As in, the green bone-breaking kid? Isn’t he like All Might’s lovechild or something?”

“That’s what I said too!”

“I mean, his hair was also lighter when he showed up today.” The hero in blue pointed out to his fellow in a voice that would have been too quiet for Dabi to hear had everyone else not gone silent as well.

“And bleach boy tried to do the same thing with the bleach, yeah. Here, I’ll tie this off, you go take care of Bakugo.”

“I’m Todoroki Touya!” Dabi snapped. “Or I used to be called by that name, anyway, before you nearly killed me, Enji. Let’s just- get back to fighting, yeah, I’m going to kill you.”

#kjhgfghjk #this really is just me making fun of the hair thing #brought on by me and my sister giggling over possibilities #from 'do he wash' to 'wait... hair bleach doesnt work like that it'd be yellowy first'#my fic #my writing #ok i think thats enough tags #bnha manga spoilers #bnha #wish tumblr would give me my line break rights back #crackfic

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iclaimedtobethebetterbard · 3 years ago

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the sky’s open wide, i’m running with the wolves - chapter 1

Fandom: Sanders Sides Characters: All the sides, background Remy, background c!Thomas Rating: Teen & up (see Warnings) Relationships: Platonic/brotherly Virgil with Logan and the Creativitwins; platonic/parental Patton & Virgil; platonic/brotherly Logan and the Creativitwins with each other; platonic/parental Janus with Logan and the Creativitwins; background endgame Moceit. Warnings: Probably some language; references to Christianity; non-graphic violence. Word count: 1570 Notes: Wolfwalkers (2020) AU! You don’t need to have seen the movie to enjoy this, though.

Read on AO3!

My writing masterpost

start - previous - here - next - masterpost

Summary: When Patton is charged with hunting down the wolves in the woods, he believes he is protecting his young son Virgil. But Virgil is afraid to watch his father vanish into the woods, and sneaks after him. When Virgil runs into three wolf cubs who hold the secrets of the forest, he has to make a choice: obey the rules he’s known all his life? Or try to help the three shapeshifting boys find their missing father—even though Virgil's always been taught that the only safe wolf is a dead one? As Virgil explores the wonderful world his new friends show him, and uncovers the lies his town is built on, he may be too late to realize that his choices will cost him more than he ever bargained for.

Chapter 1

Remy would never have particularly considered himself a God-fearing man. Oh, he said his prayers and went to church, of course, but it was more a comfortable habit woven into the fabric of his life than something he devoted much thought to. Even at nineteen, he preferred to occupy his day-to-day thoughts with such matters as the tending of his sheep, the comfort of a nice dry pair of woolen socks, the avoidance of wolves, and, most of all, the brewing of a good cup of tea.

Remy was good at his job. He tended his sheep; he stayed well away from the woods. Everyone knew you didn’t mess with the woods. Stay away from their territory, and keep up the deal of old, and always be safe. He had never put much thought into this, either; it was much more important, in Remy’s eyes, to consider the fine taste that a brew steeped just right could carry.

He never expected his thoughtless respect for the woods to pay off.

The first time Remy saw a Wolfwalker, he was twenty-five years old and had started to wonder if he even believed they were real. But after that day, he never doubted again.

After all, how else could one explain the way the huge, snarling gray wolf, poised to deliver a killing bite to one of Remy’s finest sheep, had heard that commanding howl come from the woods, and put its tail between its legs and run back home in response?

Remy had watched the wolf run, standing frozen in fear and shock—and then he’d seen the Wolfwalker. A tall, tremendous wolf standing at the edge of the treeline, easily twice the size of the largest man, with dark gray fur and eyes gleaming yellow, a jagged scar running down one side of its face. Lean and powerful. Remy instinctively knew this was no ordinary wolf.

Remy had never considered himself a God-fearing man, but staring at the Wolfwalker and the way it commanded the pack of ordinary wolves surrounding it, he thought to himself that perhaps it wouldn’t hurt to pray a little harder.

“Thank you,” he croaked out when the Wolfwalker turned its eyes on him. “Thank you, m’lord—bless ye—I’ll never cross your territory, you may be sure of that—thank you for protecting my sheep—” He barely even knew what he was saying, babbling out his thoughts in more than a little healthy terror.

He wasn’t quite sure if the way the Wolfwalker bowed its head was a nod of acknowledgement, but the next moment, the Wolfwalker was leaping away, the pack of wolves trailing in its wake. And not a single sheep of Remy’s had been harmed.

Remy didn’t see the Wolfwalker often; over the next decade or so, he crossed paths with—him? Remy somehow got the feeling it was a him—perhaps half a dozen times. Every time he came away filled with awe and fear and a renewed sense that though the Wolfwalker was terrifying and fearsome, Remy would far rather live under his odd protection than whatever farce could be provided by all these guards the new Lord Protector kept bringing around.

Before he knew it, Remy was nearly thirty-seven and his appreciation of a good cup of tea had only strengthened over the years. He went to church and said his prayers with gusto, and every night he glanced out to the woods and gave a little nod of respect. For the Wolfwalker and, these last few years, the little cubs that followed in his wake.

As long as the people kept themselves to themselves and stayed out of the woods, Remy knew there was nothing to fear from the wolves.

***

“I don’t want you to go!” Logan clung to Janus’s wrist, digging his heels into the ground and trying to physically hold him back.

Janus lifted his powerful arm and picked the near-teen right up off the ground with almost no effort at all. “This is terribly grown-up of you,” he informed his eldest son dryly.

“There are too many humans,” Logan insisted, dangling from Janus’s arm, the little claws of his hands pricking at Janus’s skin. “You said only the forest was safe!”

Janus drew a long breath. “And that has been true for time immemorial. But things have changed. I like it no more than you do. But I need you to stay here and look after your brothers, you understand me, Logan? I will find us a new forest, a safer one, without any humans who want to cut and burn the trees or trap us with iron. And then I will come back and get you three, and we will go there.”

“But this forest is ours!” Logan protested. “No other forest will be ours like this one is.”

“Logan,” Janus said, and his voice bore an undercurrent of a warning snarl now, “I am doing what I must to protect my cubs.”

He didn’t know where to go, only that they couldn’t stay here. Not with the way the humans kept getting bolder and bolder and venturing deeper into the woods. Between Logan’s poor eyesight and the twins’ recklessness, and the way all three of them were only cubs and couldn’t defend themselves well yet, Janus was getting twitchier and twitchier by the day.

Logan stilled, an unhappy look on his face. “Can I come with you, at least? I can help! I’m very good at figuring things out! We could find a new forest together!”

“No,” Janus responded at once, his heart rate quickening at the idea. “I don’t—” He broke off and reconsidered what he was about to say. “I need you to look after the twins,” he said at last, striving to keep his voice casual.

Not casual enough. Logan stared at him, a look of dawning horror on his face. “You think you might not come back!” he accused.

Janus refrained from speaking the curse he wanted to let out. Logan had always been far too observant. “Of course I’ll come back,” he lied through his teeth, running a comforting hand through Logan’s tangled hair. “I only want to make sure the way is safe for my little ones first.”

Logan had spoken the truth a moment ago: there were too many humans these days. Janus wasn’t sure it was possible to safely venture past the borders of the forest anymore. He wasn’t sure there was anywhere left to take his little ones.

He wasn’t sure he would survive this search.

But it wasn’t like there were any other options left at this point. “Logan,” Janus said, kneeling down and putting his hands on the boy’s shoulders. He focused on making his voice honey-sweet and sincere. “I’m going to keep you safe, you understand? I would never abandon you. You are in charge of keeping your brothers safe until I return, but I will be back in a month or two.” Janus held the little boy’s brown eyes and tried not to think of humans with their traps and spears and guns and the way that once Janus left the forest he would have nowhere to hide.

“I will come back,” Janus told Logan, and he put his whole heart into his lie. “I promise.”

***

“I don’t want to move to some stupid village.” Virgil kicked his feet against the edge of the wagon petulantly, poking a piece of straw through the bars of his kestrel Thomas’s cage.

Patton sighed and reached back to ruffle his son’s hair, not taking his eyes from the winding dirt road. “I know, kiddo. We’re going to have a better life there. The Lord Protector offers a handsome salary to Hunters who can bring down wolves. They say the town is terrorized day and night, and they need to rid the forest of these pests so they can safely harvest the wood and expand the borders of the town.”

“But I hate when you go hunting!” Virgil crawled up to the driver’s seat beside Patton and clung to his arm. “I’m always so scared you’ll get eaten up! Or step in a trap! Or fall off a cliff! Or drown! Or—”

“Hey, there. Hey, now.” Patton wrapped an arm around Virgil’s shoulders. “Breathe, child. Breathe for me.” He murmured soothingly for a few minutes. “Now, come on, tell me: who taught you to draw a bow and arrow?”

“You,” Virgil mumbled.

“Good lad. And who taught you to track?”

“You did.”

“And what do you think? Am I a good Hunter? Haven’t I always kept you safe as can be?”

“Yes, but—”

“Virgil,” Patton interrupted, gentle but firm.

Virgil fidgeted for a moment. “It only has to go bad once, and you’d never come home again!”

“It’s a good thing I’d never do that, then,” Patton said, chucking Virgil under the chin and chuckling. “I mean, I have a sturdy little lad to look after, I must always make sure I hasten home to him at the end of the day.” He drew Virgil close and gave him a protective, reassuring hug. “Nothing’s going to get your Papa. I promise. I will always protect you, Virgil, you hear me? And today, the best way to protect you is to find ourselves a new home out here. We’ll make do, never you worry. I’m sure you’ll have lots of new friends in no time!”

Taglist (ask to be added/removed!):

@theimprobabledreamersworld @private-snippers @fivehargreeves05

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astringofmadhousefloozies · 4 years ago

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Magicam Live

Vil’s guest is a pest. Contains coarse language, people being catty bitches, and more telling than showing.

You want more, check my Twisted Wonderland Fanfiction tag. If you liked it, let me know!

~*~*~*~

Transcript of Last Week's Magicam Live From *schoenheit_official

Vil: Hello my dearest fans! As promised, I will be showing off my newest capsule makeup collection, to be released this Monday exclusively at Feathersweep Cosmetics. However, due to high demand, instead of simply demonstrating on myself, I thought I would show that anyone could be half as beautiful as me with these!

[He holds a hand out to the side.]

V: Please welcome my fellow student at Night's Raven College, Yuu.

Yuu: Yo.

[A girl with short, dark hair and tired eyes sits down beside him. Spotty and plump, with a notable double chin. She's notably underdressed, compared to Vil.]

Y: I am she. I'm *donegotisekaid, if you haven't seen yet. Full of genuine memes from another universe, as well as me figuring this place out, and pictures of my not-cat.

V: She's simply been begging me for a makeover!

Y: He asked me if I'd do it, actually.

[Vil stops and takes a deep breath, clearly irritated.]

V: Yes, well. You've prepared?

Y: I scrubbed my face real good and managed to leave most of my pimples alone, if that's what you mean.

[Vil sighs]

V: As much as you're capable of, clearly. We'll start with the primer.

Y: [with a smile] Didn't you already give me one on how to act in this?

[Vil pinched the bridge of his nose, regret pouring from every cell in his body.]

V: Just lie back and be quiet until I'm done with you.

[Yuu looks at the camera, but says nothing. There's an audible snicker from behind the camera.]

[There are a few quiet minutes where Vil prepares her face, before selecting a foundation.]

V: So, is there a reason you don't wear makeup? You could look quite nice with it.

Y: Few reasons. It's a lot of effort, and I tire easily. I don't really like the feel of it on my face, and I tend to touch my face a lot anyways, so it doesn't last. It's a lot of money, and I break out very easily.

V: I can see that. Don't you use face wash?

Y: You should have seen me when I did use it! Much worse.

V: Ugh. I'll give you something later. And none of these have a good tone for you.

Y: Just pick the closest! I'll end up wrecking it by a few hours from now anyways.

[Vil rolled his eyes.]

V: Rook, any questions from the chat?

[A familiar accented voice from offscreen]

Rook: *stellargems wants to know how Yuu found herself at NRC.

Y: Transdimensional bullshit. I'm here until we figure out how I can get home. It's not bad, I don't miss it much.

V: Yuu even has her own dorm so she doesn't have to bother anyone.

Y: Not that it stops me.

V: [sotto voce] Don't we all know.

Y: If they kept you in a building with four usable rooms total and no electricity, you'd be out and about too. At least the ghosts there are really nice and help me out.

V: Do you kiss these ones too, or was that a one time thing?

Y: If I hadn't kissed her we'd be down a student and you and half the people I hang out with would be paralyzed, so don't make fun.

[Vil stops to regard the camera.]

V: To clarify, there was an incident with a ghost princess causing a lot of trouble at the school a few months ago. Yuu decided to kiss her to fix everything, because she's both stupid and deeply strange.

Y: It was really fun until I started dying.

V: All her blood was on the outside. It was disgusting.

Y: It did work though!

V: Keep telling yourself that, you didn't kiss the one you really wanted to.

[Yuu gives him the finger, and Vil shoves her hand down.]

R: *vilpleasefathermychildren asks-

[Yuu sputters with laughter. Vil just winks at the camera with a smile that doesn't reach his eyes.]

R: They want to know if there'll be a coupon code for the new release.

V: There will! It'll be released via the official fanclub email Sunday night.

Y: It'll be a whole three percent off and you have to pay to access it.

V: Stop that.

Y: [sweetly] No.

Rook: *getterbackback wants to know what your shirt says?

Y: Yeah, hold on.

[She stands and pulls the shirt out to be seen better. It says in large letters, I'M CUTE AND I BITE]

Y: You can do one yourself if you take a dark shirt, tape the parts you want covered, and scorch the area around it with diluted bleach. I've done a few of these, a few designs more than once.

V: Destroyed them?

Y: Nah, Lil wants at least one of every one I do.

V: [to the camera] That would be our fellow student Lilia Vanrouge, from Diasomnia.

Y: He's pretty great. He's *elderbatbrat if you want to look him up.

V: Sit back down so I can figure out which blush to use.

Y: Pinks and corals work best for my skin tone.

V: I thought you didn't wear makeup?

Y: Why do you think I know wearing it tires me out? It's not something I ever did a lot because of the effort.

Y: Except for highlighter. it's basically sparkles and it's light, so I like that.

V: You remember that, but not your proper name?

Y: Ain't life grand.

R: I'm getting several questions about that. Would you care to elabourate for the chat?

Y: Yeah. I don't remember a lot about where I'm from. Culturally? Lots. What I like? What I don't like? Everything. Names and places specific to who I was? No. And don't ask me to think about it too hard, I get the worst fucking headache and I stop seeing right.

V: You've never seen right in your life.

Y: Oh, fuck off, Vil.

[Vil stops blushing one cheek to point.]

V: Stop that.

[Yuu responds by biting at his finger with an audible click when her teeth meet, laughing hysterically as Vil pulls back in shock.]

V: !!! Dreadful little monster!

Y: Yeah, but you're the one who thought you'd get more views if I was here.

R: We indeed just surged another 20,000 views and counting! Excellent work, Yuu.

Y: Thank you, Rook.

[Vil looks ready to explode.]

Y: I won't bite again, that was just too easy. Please continue, I do want to see what magic you can do.

V: This is regular makeup.

Y: Metaphorically, you jackass.

R: *rosemassacre wants to know if you're always like this.

V: She's always this horrible.

Y: Vil first saw me and called me a dumpy little potato. I told him it's because I'm great all ways and everyone wants a taste, and slapped my ass at him. He's been obsessed with me ever since.

V: I am not obsessed with you.

R: You go into a rage over her at least once a week.

V: She can't go a week without being a pest.

Y: I went three after you kicked me out of the movie club.

V: You can't just project violence on the walls of Pomfiore because I said we weren't going to watch it!

Y: Vil, it was The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2, and it is art.

V: A man gets sawed in half in the first ten minutes.

Y: To an absolutely bangin' soundtrack. Oh that reminds me. Ad time, hold on.

[She wiggles a little before puting on her best customer service face.]

Y: If you want to access media that is quite literally from another world, please go to MonstroMedia dot com and sign up! There's ebooks, movies, tv, music, and more. Much of it is horror, sci-fi and fantasy, as it's from my person collection of media brought with me on my laptop and backup drives. You can use the code SHOENHEITSAYSWHAT for the first month free!

[She put her hand up and lowered her voice to a conspiratorial tone.]

Y: I completely understand piracy, but I'd appreciate if you paid because this is the only way I get spending money, and I can only bat my eyes at these boys so much before they expect something in return for gifts.

V: How'd Ashengrotto talk you into that one?

Y: He was going to make me start paying for all the food I eat if I didn't.

R: *waterwitchesbetgitches says, and I quote, "so like if ur the only gal at NRC how many boyfs you have"

Y: So many. At least twenty. Even more if there were girls here.

V: That is a gross exaggeration. She has maybe three, if we're being very generous on the definition.

Y: [points] And he's mad he's not one of them.

V: [squinting] You are absolutely dreadful and I can't understand how you're so popular.

Y: I like you too, Vil.

[Vil pauses, visibly taken aback.]

V: ... Thank you.

V: You know you're going to have paparazzi on your tail now, right?

Y: Aw, shit.

R: *insertmagicamhandlehere wants to know what's on your neck.

V: An antique chain with an attached charm specially made for me by Soleil Atelier.

R: I believe that was for Yuu.

[Yuu snickers, as Vil looks for himself. When her collar is pulled down, it fully reveals a vicious set of hickeys with visible toothmarks.]

V: Eww.

Y: You should see the other guy.

V: Eww!

[Vil takes a moment to recover, while Yuu laughs.]

Y: That could be a second part! Everyone needs that tutorial. "Bruise Coverup How-to by Vil Shoenheit: For when you just can't keep them off of you."

[Vil mutters something under his breath that sounds suspiciously like "nerds shouldn't be allowed to fuck"]

Y: Then where would your fans be?

V: At least there's only setting spray after this and then you can leave.

Y: Won't you get bored without me here?

R: One last question! *shroudstreaming has asked... well, there's a lengthy keysmash and an all-caps "why".

Y: Ah. Hi, babe!

Y: Hey, everyone go follow him, he's a total fucking babe and he refuses to take my word for it, no matter what I do to him-

[Vil sprays setting spray directly in her face, leading to Yuu coughing.]

V: No taste at all, and gross to boot.

Y: Asshole.

[Vil offers a mirror]

V: No. Miracle worker.

[Yuu looks... well, the same, but with an even, well made-up face.]

Y: ... Aww. You remembered I like sparkles.

V: Less likely to scrub it off if you actually like it.

[Yuu's admiring herself for a few moments in silence, with Vil watching, quite pleased.]

Y: Hey, can I do you next?

V: Absolutely not.

Y: Ask the chat.

V: No.

R: Chat says yes.

V: [With a visible eye roll] Ugh, fine.

Y: Aight. Take your shirt off.

V: What.

[Yuu brings up a case and flips it open. Inside is a magazine with a gory cover, and various things like fake blood and liquid latex.]

Y: Alright kiddies. You wanna learn how to slit a man's throat?

[Vil gets up and walks away without another word.]

Y: You said I could! Get back here!

[Yuu follows. Rook emerges from behind the camera.]

R: That's it for tonight, ma belles. Next time.

[Magicam Live ends, but not before audible yelling and scuffling, quickly cut off.]

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland fanfiction #vil schoenheit

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joshuas · 4 years ago

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pick-up lines 101

♫ pairing: Lee Felix x Reader

♫ genre: college/university student!au, slice-of-life, crack (the entire concept), fluff

♫ word count: 10.4k

♫ warnings: Nil of note!

♫ summary: A continuation on from the Chan drabble - an utterly ridiculous fic, where Felix and the reader (who unenthusiastically) go to literal extremes to break the two up, whilst falling for each other along the way.

♫ a/n: The second addition to my Christmas oneshots! Enjoy this high-key chaotic fic! I’m sorry that it’s 10k - I think I got a little carried away (╥﹏╥). This drabble is entirely fictional, please do not take any of Felix’s actions to heart (because he’s a sweetheart and we all know it).

♫ fyi: Reader 1 (Chan’s lover) is often referred to as “Mariah Carey/playlist lover” just to be gender neutral!

♫ skz christmas oneshots: 1|2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8

“Let me get this straight... you want me to help break up Chan and... what’s their name- Mariah Carey lover, just so that Chan can give you pick-up lines again? Even though you’re the reason they started dating?” You leaned back against your chair, raising your eyebrows at the boy in front of you. “Well. Yes. And... Mariah Carey lover? You seriously don’t remember their name?” Your friend, Felix, raised his eyebrows. “All I care is that the person is now identifiable to me. Names are so arbitrary.” You dismissed nonchalantly. “Okay... but will you help me?” Felix turned to you with puppy dog eyes. “You know puppy dog eyes don’t work on me but whatever. I’ll help.” You got up, placing your books in your bag as Felix swiftly helped you clean up. “Oh, Y/N. You have no idea how much this means to me.” He draped his arm around your shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze before releasing as the two of you exited the library. “Oh, I think I do...” You muttered as Felix excitedly explained his long-winded and elaborate plan to ‘save Chanlix’.

“C‘mon Chan hyung. It’ll be fun!” “I don’t know, Felix... wouldn’t Y/N be third-wheeling?” You observed the situation in front of you, casually eating your fairy floss as Felix looked to you for help in his mission to convince Chan to do a ‘how well do you know your partner?’ challenge at the local Christmas fair. “I don’t think Y/N really cares. Come on, hyung. If you’re not doing it for me, do it for the prize!” Felix pleaded with Chan. “The prize being... a book of ‘pick-up lines to keep your relationship fresh and interesting!’?” Chan raised his eyebrows at you.

You shrugged your shoulders, “He’s been your friend longer than mine.” “See! Y/N’s so unbothered. Please, hyung. I’ll do anything.” Felix pleaded. “...Alright. Let’s line up.” Chan reluctantly followed an excited Felix, as you trudged slowly after them.

The line was ridiculously long. Taking you half an hour to get to the front of the line, you were just about done with Felix’s antics. As Felix handed in the answers to the two questionnaires, Chan’s phone buzzed. Quickly typing a reply, his face lightened up as he waved someone over.

“Hey, Felix, I hope you don’t mind but I think I’ll partner with umm... my beloved on this one. And hey, Y/N’s here, so you can get that awesome prize with them!” Chan patted Felix on the back, his partner *cough cough* beloved approached him, pushing him lightly for being so “cringy”. Felix nodded, slightly devastated, forcing a smile as Chan and his partner walked past him, taking a seat with the other contestants. Mulling over his thoughts, Felix paced the floor as you watched more and more couples sign up for the contest. His features lightened, and as if struck by an amazing idea, he pulled you towards the sign up desk, “Do we really have to do this?” You groaned as Felix signed you up, determined. “Even though this wasn’t supposed to happen, I have just been presented with the perfect way to show Chan that I’m better than his significant other.” You looked at him confusedly, “How... are you going to do that, exactly?” “By winning.” He said, tone as if he were stating the obvious, “So, get your game face on, Y/N. We’re going to wipe the floor with them.” “Totally...”

The game was heated. You were utterly confused as to why people were so fiercely competitive to get a book of pick up lines. Don’t these people have anything better to do? “And now we have Bang Chan! Would you please come to the stage with your partner?” The MC’s voice rang out clearly across the stage, snapping you out of your reverie. Out of the corner of your eye you saw Felix lean forward, anxiously tapping his foot. “So, like all the other contestants have done, I’ll ask a couple of questions and we’ll see if your partner’s answers match with yours on the questionnaire. However, you can only win if both of you are able to answer as many questions about each other correctly.” The MC explained for the billionth time as Chan flashed an encouraging smile towards his partner. “Hey, Felix? Haven’t they been friends since childhood? How do you even expect us to have a chance?” You asked, doubtful. “Don’t worry, Y/N. I have a plan.” Felix reassured you, his eyes glued on the couple on stage. Oh, great. “First question! Ooh this is interesting. If Chan wasn’t studying music currently, what would he be doing?” Before anyone could answer, Felix yelled from his seat, “He’d be an actor or an athlete. He’d also be a kangaroo, if he could be... which I don’t really understand since they’re literally a pest species.” “Correct? Regardless of whoever answered, the points go to you guys.” The MC chuckled, slightly confused, as Chan and his partner tentatively high-fived each other. “Next question! What is Chan’s favourite season?” The MC looked pointedly at Mariah Carey playlist lover. As they opened their mouth to speak, Felix sighed loudly, “This is too easy. It’s Autumn, obviously.” You turned to Felix, embarrassed, as heads turned towards where the two of you were seated. “GeT rEaDy, Y/N. We’Re gOinG tO wiPe tHe fLoOr wiTh tHeM.” You mocked, imitating his earlier statement. “You do realise that if you keep answering the questions, they’ll end up winning. If I remember correctly, you wanted to beat them, not help them.” You hissed, annoyed at his impulsiveness. “Plans can be slightly altered. It’ll work out.” Felix shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. You pinched the bridge of your nose, Honestly, this boy only runs off two brain cells. To think of the lengths he’d go to just be told pick up lines from Chan. You’d think that he was fighting to the death for his beloved... “Haha... another point to the couple. Honestly, you guys won’t have to do anything to win at this point.” The MC pointed out awkwardly. “Let’s move onto the next question. This is easy. What is Chan’s favourite hobby?” The MC’s smile faltered as Felix stood up, everyone directing their attention towards him once again, “He loves to play sport!” You sunk low into your seat, pulling the hood of your hoodie over your head as you avoided the heavy gaze of the other contestants and other onlookers. Tugging Felix back to his seat, he slowly sat down as the MC looked at the two of you and Chan and his partner confusedly, “Ha... maybe the two of you should have partnered up.” He pointed to Chan and Felix who was adamantly glaring at the bewildered couple. “Right, so another point to the two of you. Let’s move on...” The game continued, Felix answering every single question as you cringed at his eagerness... until it came to Mariah Carey person’s turn. From then, he sat in stony silence, glaring at the couple as Chan answered every question correctly.

“Onto our next couple! Y/N and... Felix.” You sat down in the seat opposite Felix on the stage, mentally running through everything you know about him. “First question! Remember, it’s important that the both of you answer correctly, in order to win. What is Felix’s favourite colour?” You exhaled in relief, okay. These questions are kind of reasonable, “Black.” “Correct! Ooh, looks like Chan’s going to have to look out!” Your answer streak continued, with you answering the questions almost immediately. They weren’t too ridiculous (which you hadn’t expected, considering Felix). Eventually came Felix’s turn, “Alright, Felix. Let’s hope you know Y/N as well as you do Chan.” The audience chuckled at the MC’s comment as Felix flushed awkwardly (the boy was finally embarrassed istg). “Looks like the two of you were on the same wavelength! What is Y/N’s favourite colour?” An awkward silence filled the stage as Felix looked at you with utter panic. You shook your head in disappointment. Surely. Surely he kno— “Uhh turquoise?” Turquoise???? This boy. Honestly. “Incorrect! What a shame. Let’s move onto the next question.” As the game went on, awkward silences patterned with the MC’s new favourite response of ‘incorrect!’

“It’s a real shame that you and Chan weren’t partnered together.” The MC patted Felix’s back sympathetically as you headed back to the contestants whilst Chan and his partner collected their prize, Chan cracking the cheesiest of pickup lines on his very much embarrassed significant other, “You know, my shirt’s so soft. Do you know what material it’s made of? Boyfriend material.” “Oh my god, Chan, stoppp.” As the crowd dissipated, you stood, beckoning Felix to walk with you, “I thought you wanted to win.” You said dryly, as Felix turned to you, defensive, “How am I supposed to know the intimate and in-depth details of your life?” “Favourite colours are hardly intimate, and generally friends are supposed to listen to each other, and talk to each other about their interests?” You raised your eyebrows. He sighed in defeat, “You’re right. I’m sorry. How about we grab a hot chocolate and you can tell me all the answers to those questions.” He held out his hand to you. You looked at it questioningly, slowly taking it, interlocking your fingers with his, ignoring the fluttering of your heart, “I know you’re only doing this so that I can help you but I’m far too hungry to care about your motives.” “Of course not. It’s just also the perfect time to talk about our next course of action. Amongst talking about you, obviously.” “Sure...”

Impatiently tapping your foot as you waited in line to ‘confront Chan’, you turned to glare at Felix who was seated in his car just outside the cafe. Taking out your phone, you texted him, [10:38] Remind me again of what I have to do and why I’m doing this? [10:40] (Felix) You really don’t remember?? [10:40] to be fair, it’s an elaborate plan... [10:41] (Felix) fine. Basically you have to approach Chan hyung and give him a pick up line. Then I’ll walk in, and he’ll use it on me, and all order in the world will be restored. As to why you’re doing this... you’re doing it because you looooooooove me 😌 [10:42] More like haaaaaate but whatever. wouldn’t it seem like I was hitting on him?? [10:43] (Felix) 😭 😭 you wound me with your words, y/n. We all know that I’m your favourite person and you’d do anything for me. It should be fine. [10:44] I could leave this cafe and never talk to you again [10:45] (Felix) No!! Y/N pleaseeeee do this for me. I’ll ✨ love ✨ you forever ️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ Ignoring the skip of your heart at his text, you rolled your eyes, Get a grip, Y/N. This guy clearly only has eyes for a certain pick-up lines guy. [10:46] nobody wants that. I’ll do it because I’m a good person. Please revoke your hearts. [10:47] (Felix) Neverrrrr ️️️️️️️️️️️️️️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ [10:47] (Felix) oh! You’re up in line!! Go! You got this!! Steeling yourself, you smiled as you approached the counter Chan was working at, “Hey, Y/N! How are you?” Chan greeted you cheerfully, dimples on full display. Ahh too bright. My eyes— his smile’s too charming. I kind of understand why the whole playlist thing went well. “Heyyy Chan! I’m good. How do you brew?” You laughed awkwardly, internally cringing. “Oh, I’m brewing good too. Can I get you anything?” He grinned at your pun. “Uh— just a latte for me, thanks.” You panicked, stating the first thing you saw on the menu. “One latte coming right up. So, how’s Felix? I haven’t seen him since the festival. I know he really wanted that pick up line book.” He looked at you, his eyes slightly guilty as he started the espresso machine. You could say that... “Yeah, he’s been taking it... pretty hard. How have you been finding the book?” You asked. “The book’s pretty cool, actually. I’ve come across some pretty great pick up lines. Oh! There’s this one where—“ You cut him off as he poured in two teaspoons of sugar, regurgitating the pick up line Felix had forced you to practice repeatedly in the car beforehand. “I have a better one- hold the sugar, please. You’re sweet enough for me.” Ughhhhhh. Ugh. That was— ugh. I should start apologising. Chan’s eyes widened, his expression similar to a deer caught in headlights, “I— Wow! You’re just full of creativity, Y/N. Look at you, two pick up lines in one morning. I’m going to have to use them on my partner, now.” He laughed awkwardly. “No!” You interjected. “No?” You took a deep breath, “You can only use them on your best friend.” “Is this like one of those ‘repost this chain or you’ll die in 13 days or something like that’ things but in real life?” Chan questioned, confused. You turned around, not-so-subtly beckoning Felix to come into the cafe. “Haha... what??? Oh and just to be clear, I wasn’t hitting on you, so can you please continue putting in the sugar?” “I know. It’s pretty obvious that you have feelings for— Oh hey Felix! I— oof!” He stumbled backwards from the impact of someone— oh it’s his playlist lover, wrapping him into a hug. “Hey. What’s up?” He released them, looking at them concerned. “Nothing. I just missed you today.” “Oh that reminds me. Y/N told me these epic pick up lines. I have to use them on you...” I mean. They are best friends... You looked apologetically at Felix who stood, his jaw clenched, passively fuming as he observed the couple from the door, “Felix, I’m really sorry that your plan failed again.” You patted his back sympathetically. “It’s fine... we just have to come up with something more attention grabbing!” He nodded resolutely, leading you out of the cafe. “Wait— I left my coffee!” “There’s no time to lose, Y/N. I’ve already come up with our next plan.” Oh no.

The next phase of the plan was... extravagant to say the least. Felix hadn’t told you much but seeing the long to-do list he had written out... it was a bit much. Approaching the art department, you knocked on the door of the workshop whilst Felix strode confidently past you. Upon hearing the knock and Felix’s footsteps, a brown-haired boy looked up from what looked like it was supposed to be a sculpture but was really just a blob of clay, “Minho hyung... my man! My bro! What’s up?” Felix clapped the boy’s shoulder. You shook your head in disgust, Why is he so cringy? The boy - Minho, narrowed his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest, “What do you want, Felix?” “Why do people always assume that I want anything? What if I just wanted to hang out with my dearest friends without any motives except for showing my appreciation for you guys being in my life?” Felix raised his hands in surrender defensively. “Hell would have to freeze over for that to happen.” You hummed, Minho snorting at your comment as Felix clutched his chest in mock offence. “Well, as you can see, no one buys your sentiment, so tell me what you want.” Minho sighed. “You both wound me with your verbal warfare, but... I actually need a favour.” Felix stated tentatively. “A favour?” Minho raised an eyebrow. “I need you to make me a life sized present.” He said seriously. Do you ever look at someone and wonder what on earth is going on in their head? Yeah, there’s no point on doing that for Felix. Nothing can explain what goes on in there. “I need to what? Why?” Minho looked at Felix, incredulous. “That’s on a need-to-know basis and you don’t need to know. Look, all I need you to do is find a human-sized box and decorate it with wrapping paper and whatnot. Just make it look like a present.” Felix explained, slightly impatient. “...why me?” Minho asked, reluctant. “You’re an art major, right? This’ll be in your ballpark. I give you full creative liberty. Just make it look as pretty and realistic as possible.” Felix clapped Minho’s back, waving as he exited the workshop. You gave Minho an apologetic glance before chasing after Felix. “...but I’m an accounting major.” Minho sighed, defeated.

“Y/N, Minho hyung just dropped off the present! Come look at it!” Felix called from the foyer. The two of you were currently “house sitting” Chan’s apartment. Technically Chan didn’t ask you guys to, since he was only going away for a day. However, Felix insisted on it, using the excuse of ‘watering Chan’s plants’ to execute his plan. Chan doesn’t have any plants. Ignoring Felix’s poor attempt at a cover, Chan let Felix do whatever but gave clear instructions to not break or burn anything. Wandering over to Felix, you gaped at the... present in front of you. On the floor, in front of you, was literally just a human-sized cardboard box (that was falling apart, the clear sticky tape holding the corners together by a thread) with random Christmas wrapping adorning the sides of it, alongside a lid (with breathing holes) and a bow on top. Minho must be a modern art student or something, because this is... interesting to say the very least (no offence to modern art students/artists - love y’all). “It’s so beautiful!” Felix fussed over it, his eyes sparkling with excitement and awe. Of course Felix would like it. I guess art truly is in the eye of the beholder. “So, are you going to tell me what you’re going to do with that?” You crossed your arms over your chest staring pointedly at the box. “I’m going to hide in this present until Chan hyung comes back from his hometown tomorrow morning at nine on the dot. Chan hyung will see this mysterious package in the living room and his curiosity will force him to open it, revealing me! I’ll give him a pick-up line, he’ll laugh and we’ll both live happily ever after.” “Not to rain on your Disney princess movie parade but I don’t think you’ve thought any of the logistics through. How are you—“ “Y/N, stop. Let a professional work their work. Don’t worry, I’ve figured everything out.” He waved his hand dismissively, picking up the box and beckoning you to grab the other side. “Don’t come crawling back to me when you need help. Or food.” You warned.

“Just sit still! Stop moving! Otherwise I’ll duct tape your hands together.” You waved the duct tape roll threateningly as Felix fidgeted in the box. On the way to the living room, the box had decided to collapse in on itself as you had expected. Felix, being Felix, was distraught, causing you to be here now fixing the box up with duct tape as Felix sniffed sadly at its unfortunate demise. “I’m sorry, Y/N! Please don’t! How would I be able to eat?” He surrendered, eyes wide. “That’s for you to figure out and for me not to care about. Lucky for you, I’m not that cruel.” You stuck the last piece of tape on the box, dusting your knees as you stood, helping Felix move closer to the Christmas tree in the corner of the room. “Okay, so this is where I leave you.” “You’re leaving already??” Felix pouted, your heartbeat quickening, He really wants to hang out with me? No... He’s probably just worried he’ll be bored. “It wasn’t really at the top of my Christmas wish list to spend Christmas Eve with a man stuck in a life sized present waiting for his friend to come home so that he can give him a pick-up line. I also wouldn’t dare ruin your future moment with Chan. You have your phone, right? Call me if you need me.” You sighed, grabbing your keys as you stuck the lid on Felix, he let out a muffled “bye” as you left the apartment.

“Y/N? Can you pick me up? I’m scared.”

“Y/NNNN I’m bored. Come over.” “Tell me what you think of this pick-up line...” Swiftly deleting the 40 voicemails Felix had left you overnight, you rolled your eyes, a small (but uncontrollable) smile forming on your face at his dramatics. Okay, you were kind of fond of Felix’s theatrics. Not that it matters, though. You sighed, rolling out of bed. It was a bit tiring - having to foster feelings towards someone that doesn’t feel the same way. Just be a good friend, Y/N. That’s all that matters right now. Your phone buzzed, the caller ID showing Felix. You sighed, picking up the phone, “He—“ “Y/N? You need to come. Like now.” Felix whispered hurriedly. “Why?” You raised your eyebrows at his urgency. “Why? Chan hyung was two hours late. He came back at 11 instead of nine. And guess who he came home with?” “Playlist lover.” You answered instantly, getting ready to pick him up. “Exactly. And y’know what they’ve been doing for the past hour and a bit? Making gingerbread and being a ridiculous, annoyingly cute couple. So now I’m hungry and... I really need to go to the bathroom.” He whined. “Can I just say that you really did not figure out the logistics in this plan.” You pointed out. “Logistics don’t matter when it comes to friendship!” He whispered dramatically. “Whatever. Look, I have a plan. You just need to trust me on this one.” You said, pulling a ‘disguise’ out of your closet. “Somehow that doesn’t give me comfort because normally I’m the one who makes the plans in this relationship.” “And look at how that turned out for you. I’ll see you in a bit!” You hung up on him, grabbing your car keys and heading out.

Dressed in the daggiest of outfits (lots and lots of flannel and a low cap), you knocked on the door to Chan’s apartment, revealing a floury Bang Chan and his even more floury significant other, “Y/N, is that you?” “Huh—“ you cleared your throat, deepening your voice, “uh, no. I’m their cousin. Hence, the resemblance.” “Okay... how can I help you, then?” He asked, his tone uncertain. “Oh. Well. I was hoping that I could inspect the place. I’m... your new landlord!” You exclaimed, recalling the notice you had seen around the complex. “Oh? Of course! The notices did say that you were coming for inspections.” He ushered you in, showing you through to the living room. Your eyes landed on the ‘present’ in the corner of the room. I need to get them out of here somehow. “Oh! I think I can smell something burning. You might want to check that out. Could you also point me towards the bathroom?” You asked innocently. “Ah! Of course. It’s the first room to the right in the hallway.” He gestured towards the hall as he and his partner ran to the kitchen. Rushing over to Felix, you grunted, dragging the box as quickly as you can into a room that resembled a studio. Grabbing out a pocket knife, you tore through the duct tape, lifting the lid as Felix scrambled out of the box and to the bathroom, shooting you a relieved smile. This boy. Honestly, why does he do this to himself? Hearing footsteps approaching, you panicked, hopping into the box, closing the lid on you. “Why are you in the box?” Felix approached, drying his hands hurriedly. “I thought you were Chan...” You awkwardly stepped out. “It doesn’t matter anymore! Let’s go!” He whispered hurriedly, heading towards the door as you pulled him back. “Well... you can’t come out the front with me...” you scanned the room, your eyes locking on the window in front of you. Felix followed your gaze, terror filling his eyes, “Y/N! I can’t do that! It’s so high!” He clung to you as you pushed him towards the window. “We’re literally on the ground floor. The height difference between this window and the ground is probably at half your height at most.” You flicked his hands off you, as he slowly sat on the ledge of the window as you opened the window, the cold air greeting you. “No! Y/N, I can’t do it. It’s too—“ His protesting cut off as you lightly pushed him, causing him to stumble off the ledge, tripping and falling to the ground as he landed on the thick snow outside the complex. Instantly, he lay down, yelling incoherent dramatics. Holding back your laughter, you chucked the present box next to him and shut the window, “Merry Christmas!” You re-emerged from the hallway. Somehow Chan and his Mariah Carey playlist lover were looking worse — icing adorned and everything. Oh my gosh. They’re that cliche fanfic couple that make a huge mess when cooking together. How disgusting. “Thank you for allowing me to use your bathroom. I’ll be heading out now.” “Really? What about the inspection?” Chan questioned, eyes wide. “Oh everything’s fine. Okay, bye!” You started towards the front door as Chan blocked your exit. “Wait! We just wanted to give you these gingerbread cookies. You basically saved them and we felt bad that you had to work on Christmas.” He handed the cookies to you, his tone pitiful. “Oh. Well if you insist, who am I to refuse?” You waved at them as you left the complex just as someone dressed in basically the same outfit as you approached their door, “Excuse me! Mr Bang Chan? I’m your new landlord. I came for an inspection?” They yelled, as your eyes widened in horror, bolting as fast as you could out of the complex. “I like your outfit, by the way!” They yelled after you. You caught up to Felix as he waited outside your car. “Now do you have faith in my plans?” You crossed your arms over your chest, still slightly out of breath. You thought back to the narrow escape you had with the actual landlord, Gosh, literally the first time someone compliments me for my fashion sense, it’s when I’m trying to dress up like them unintentionally. “If I say yes, will you give me a cookie?” “Absolutely not.”

“Oh, hey Y/N and Felix. Thanks for taking care of my house whilst we were away. I’m glad to see that nothing broke or burnt.” Chan brought Felix into a bro hug thing as you handed his partner a basket of gingerbread cookies, entering the Christmas-themed household. “It’s not like you weren’t about to burn the house down by yourselves.” You muttered. “Hm?” Chan looked at you expectantly. “Oh! I said... I didn’t burn the gingerbread.” You pointed at the basket of gingerbread. “You know! That’s so funny. We nearly burnt down the house a couple of days ago with our Christmas cookies.” Chan and his partner laughed nervously. “We know.” Felix blurted out. You elbowed Felix, panicked. “I see you still have your decorations up.” You said quickly changing the topic, taking in the mistletoe hanging from the ceiling and the tinsel adorned shelves. “Yeah, well we wanted to have a Christmas party but both of us went home on Christmas and it’s not illegal to have Christmas decorations up two days after Christmas.” Chan explained, handing you both mugs of eggnog. “Actually, it is. But I’ll put up with your offence.” You smirked, sipping at your eggnog. “Thank you for your everlasting generosity, Y/N. Now, you two should go and enjoy the party.” Chan clapped your backs, pushing you and Felix into the party scene. “So... what’s the plan?” You turned to Felix who was observing the couple. “Honestly, Y/N, this is my last shot.” He sighed, exhausted. “Okay... and what are you going to do?” You looked at him, concerned at his sudden dampen in mood. “I’m going to give him a pick up line.” He said triumphantly. “Um. Haven’t you been trying to do that the entire time?” You questioned, confused. “And this is the last time I’m trying that. I’m going to give him one so that he’ll be left with no choice but to fall on his knees, weeping huge tears of regret as he struggles to give me one that matches it’s sheer brilliance.” He explained (dramatically). “Sure. Come find me when you’ve had the happily ever after we’ve all been waiting for.” You shot him a quick smile before moving off to talk to playlist lover.

Soft jazz versions of classic Christmas songs played as people departed from the party.

Walking over to the hallway, you stopped, looking at a dejected Felix leaning against the wall.

“How did it go?” You said, tentatively approaching him.

“What can I say? He’s in love.” He sighed defeatedly.

“Let me guess, he used it on playlist lover?” You asked bluntly.

He nodded dejectedly.

You sighed, steeling yourself, glancing up at the mistletoe between the two of you,

It’s now or never, Y/N.

“I must be a snowflake. Because I’ve fallen for you.”

A shocked silence fell over the two of you as you stumbled to recover your dignity.

“I—“

“Say that again.”

“Huh?”

“The pick up line. Say it again.”

“...I must be a snowflake. Because I’ve fallen for you.” You muttered.

“That... do you mean that?”

“Well. Yes. In a sense because I’m not a snowflake. That’s just weird. Why did I say that? I also don’t think anyone that only liked you as a friend would go to such lengths to help salvage a friendship you don’t really need to salvage. Look, obviously the dynamic between you and Chan has changed since he got a girlfriend. But hey, if you feel the same way, I could be the Chan to your Felix. In a romantic manner, obviously... perhaps as your partner?” You looked nervously at the ground.

“You really like me? After everything I put you through?” He asked, incredulous.

“Although it was extremely ridiculous, it was entertaining... and we got to spend time together.” You quietened your voice for the last part.

“Well, we must both be snowflakes because I’ve fallen for you too.” He lifted your chin, eyes interlocked with yours.

“That was really cheesy.” You murmured.

“Hey, you’re the one that used it on me first.” Felix defended.

“Mmk. Well. For this to work you need to—“ He interrupted you, capturing your lips with his briefly.

“Did that make up for it?” He stepped back, breathless.

“Th-that was cheesy too.” You stuttered, shocked.

“Well, our relationship hasn’t exactly been cliche until now.”

“Ah yes, kissing under the mistletoe. It’s almost like the ending of a Christmas classic movie.” You sighed.

“Almost?” Felix raised an eyebrow.

“Minus the pick up lines.”

“Yeah, well you’re roped into this now. You’ve given me the expectation that you’ll give me a pick up line every time you see me.” He smirked.

“No. I refuse.” You grabbed your bag, waving at Chan and his partner as you exited his apartment, Felix on your heels.

“Three a day?”

“One.”

➳ part three? | masterlist!

129 notes · View notes

mybrothershands · 4 years ago

Text

MBH/Dumpling Crossover

featuring @diddlesanddoodles lovely characters and edited by @thundering-sussurus

"No," Cairo said blatantly before Ka had a chance.

Farris eyed Cairo with a deadpan expression.

“Luckily, we ain’t so desperate a condition as to be needin’ yer services,” Farris replied, but there was a single vein along his temple that pulsed in repressed irritation. His eyes moved back up to Ka and he asked, “Ye always let that one talk fer ye?”

The man clamped his hand over Cairo's mouth. A lump had formed in Ka's throat, and he swallowed. "Ah... I, that is." He took a deep breath and steadied himself. Something about the man made him anxious, and he could not help but shuffle in place a bit. "No, I thank you very much for... for letting me work."

He glanced over at the men working the enormous pumpkins. It was so odd to see so many halfling giants in one place. They were a far cry from being human, and yet their weathered hands seemed small and delicate as they worked. Somehow they had cultivated larger foodstuffs, and Ka found himself a bit jealous. They did not look as lumbering or stupid as he must. There were so few foods that were to-scale for his kind, and yet these people seemed to have every luxury and more, even if some of the animals were a bit... unorthodox.

He quickly looked away, realizing he must have been staring. Ka's eyes moved to Nenani, still sitting comfortably in Farris's arm. It was then he realized this must be the man who watched her while she was sick. The giant cocked his head ever so slightly. Maybe there was more to this man.

Ka picked his head up, meeting the little giant's eyes for the first time. They were a piercing pale green, and he felt as if they might bore right through him. He cleared his throat, trying not to look away. "Is there anything I can do in the meantime? Anything at all. Decorations hung, moving tables..." he cringed before offering the next suggestion, thinking of what he might be asked to do to those poor birds, "...unloading the wagon?"

Farris did not miss the heavy reluctance in his voice.

“I know a tenderfoot when I see one. So stop lookin’ like a panicked scullery maid,” Farris admonished.

Scullery maid? Still, Ka nodded at the instructions, more than happy to listen in silence. "Yessir, thank you," he said when Farris was done, then eyed Avery. He was not sure how he felt about being called a beanpole, but, in any case, he seemed to have gotten over his shock well enough. Past that, he did not seem as hard as Farris. None of them did.

Cairo, however, was getting testy at constantly having his mouth shut by giant fingers. "You're gonna suffocate me," the human grumbled when he was finally free. His companion ignored him and listened for instructions.

“Avery and Bart will handle the birds. Yer with Saen on pumpkin duty. They need broken down, cut up, and fried so my bakers can get them into the pies and into the ovens for luncheon service.” He turned around to call out towards the black-haired cook sitting among the piles of pumpkins. “Avery. Come and start in on these birds. I want the first batches roastin’ within the hour.”

Avery stood, looking utterly relieved to be taken off pumpkin duty, and marched towards them. His step faltered, however, as he got his first real look at Ka. But he squared his shoulders and continued towards the cart, trying to play off his momentary hesitation.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he said, glancing him up and down as he fished two of the birds from the back of the cart. He held one under each of his burly arms. “Who’s the bean pole?”

“Ka’s helpin’ out today,” Farris replied dismissively. “Now shut yer gob and get to it. The spice mixture is in the green jar on the counter. Should be enough fer all of ‘em, so don’t be too heavy handed.” He turned towards Ka and jerked his head in a clear indication for him to follow. “We move fast down here, understand? Ye have a question? Ask it. And I ain’t no babysitter either. Only child down here is the lil’un.”

Farris led him over to the fire pit. A table had been placed nearby, and on it sat a few knives, a long handled wooden spoon, and two large crocks: one of butter and the other of honey. Farris eyed the knives and then said, “I’ll get a more size appropriate knife fer ye. In the meantime, sit down and Yale will be back with yer breakfast.”

"Thank you," Ka said as he approached the pit. He nodded politely to the one called Saen and noticed how the little giant's hair stuck up in the front. At first glance, he looked a bit puckish, though that was yet to be determined. Ka found and palmed the pumpkin Avery had left behind. There was a patch of the orange skin the skin already shaved off, he noted. Taking a moment to study it, Ka sat down near the table and took one of the small knives, despite Farris's offer.

After a few attempts to work with the little knife that felt like a kid's toy in his hand, he seemed to remember something. "Oh, I actually have... my own." He pulled on the strap of his satchel, then flipped the top open, producing a six-foot blade that was definitely not a kitchen knife. It was blunted and had several nicks in it, however, apparently unloved. He reached out, arm easily closing the distance, and held it into the flames for a moment to burn off any filth.

"I am Ka, by the way," he said, eyeing the man who looked about his age. "He told me your name, but... I'm afraid I've already forgotten."

Putting down his own knife, Saen extended a welcoming hand to Ka.

“I’m Saen,” replied the cook with a wide friendly smile. Ka at first reached out with his left hand to shake, but then realized his error and switched the pumpkin to his other hand and shook with his right. It did not feel too small, as he thought it might have. It was more like shaking a boy's hand, though calloused and firm.

"Saen," he repeated.

“And don’t mind Avery none," Sean continued. "He’s got all the tact of a mule and as much sense as a rusted penny.”

“I heard that!” Avery called as he came back up the steps from having delivered the first two birds to Bart.

“Maybe ye were meant to!” Saen retorted with a cheeky grin. Avery threw up a rude gesture as he went to the cart to collect two more birds. Saen just laughed and said, “Ye should be grateful this one came to rescue from prep work. Yer right shit at peeling.”

Yale appeared then at the top of the steps with the two meat pies, bundled up in a clean tea towel. He stopped to talk to Farris for a moment before continuing on towards Ka and Saen.

Nenani pulled at the kitchen master’s shirt to ask a question. “Fine. Just keep outta the way now and don’t be a pest, eh?” Farris warned before crouching down and releasing Nenani onto the ground.

“I won’t,” she promised and scampered along after Yale. Farris eyed the courtyard and the workers within before turning and taking the steps down into the kitchen.

Careful not to touch the still-hot blade, Ka made quick work of the gourd, peeling the skin away in long, thin ribbons. Both Yale and Saen watched with no small amount of awe at how Ka made such fast work of the gourd. With a wide grin, Saen turned to Yale. “Can we keep him?”

The pumpkin fit like a large potato in his hand, so the task really was not that difficult for him. Still, he bit back a smile and pretended to be too focused on his work to notice. Then two sets of feet approached, one big and one small, and he picked up his head. "Hello again," he greeted Yale. Finding Nenani on the ground, he thought it might be safe to release Cairo and set the pumpkin on the table. He double-tapped his chest as a warning before fishing the man out of his pocket.

Cairo grumbled a bit, but stretched as soon as his feet were on the grass. "Stiff as a board," he groaned, then reached his hand in his britches and scratched his rear.

Meanwhile, Nenani walked up to Cairo but stopped a few feet short. She bounced on her heels, a little bashful and said, “Hello.”

The man frowned, eyeing her with a squint. He looked the girl up and down, then squinted further. He turned his head and spit on the ground. "Can I help you?" he growled.

There weren’t many humans in the castle, and Nenani had wanted to ask the man questions about his life with Ka. But any questions she had died on her tongue as she stared down at the floor where Cairo had spit. She made a face and, looking back up, met his gaze with a disapproving frown. “That’s gross.”

He raised a brow. "So it is," Cairo said, a bit bored. He jerked his thumb back towards the kitchen where Farris had disappeared. "That one there, little man, he take care of you?"

She nodded. “Yeah. Everyone in the kitchen kind of does, but Farris is my actual guardian. See?” She reached into the top of her dress to pull out her marker. It was nothing but a simple leather strap with a struck metal medallion, and she held it up to him, showing off the side with Farris’s seal.

Cairo furrowed his brow and gave a simple grunt. "Collared you, then," he said. Still, it was rare he met one who did not fear the giants. Even Ka she had been kind to. Crossing his arms, he studied the piece, but did not move to touch. "Why?"

“It’s not a collar,” Nenani insisted with a mild glare. “It’s supposed to let everyone know I’m allowed to be here and to leave me alone. Because if you don’t have a marker, you might be trespassing. And not everyone here likes humans and might try to hurt you.”

The man regarded her for a moment. That did not bode well for him; then again, he had not planned to leave Ka's side, either. He thought for a moment longer, then spoke slowly. "We don't have anything like that," Cairo began, "but Ka does have a pocket that lets the regular folk know he's safe."

He had detested the idea of the marker at first, but on second thought, it might be quite nice to silently say that one was protected by a giant. A bit of a trophy in his mind. He then looked back and realized something else. "With protection comes..." He paused, trying to think of the correct word, and then realized what a stupid thought he had had. "I don't think it would be proper for me to wear one. It's my job to keep him safe, not the other way around."

She regarded him with confusion at first, looking back towards Ka and all his towering height and substantial bulk and then back at the much smaller Cairo. She smiled knowingly. “That’s what Jae says about Barnaby and Maevis. That Barnaby is more Maevis’s guardian than he is his.” She tucked her marker back inside her dress. “But don’t be worried about not having a marker of your own. Farris’s permission is good enough. No one will bother you while you’re here in the kitchens. I’ve only had one giant try and hurt me since I came here. I threw a pepperseed in his eye.”

Cairo raised his brow. "Good girl," he lauded. "And what did little man do when he found out?"

“Bart told Keral first,” she replied.

“What’s this about Keral?” Yale asked, having heard only the tail end of their conversation. He had moved to the fire pit and the large flat pan that had been placed atop a thin metal rack of sorts to hold it above the fire.

“I was telling him about Thrist trying to eat me that one time,” Nenani answered matter of factly.

Yale growled darkly at that. “Yeah, that swine-faced fucker ain’t gonna be tryin’ that again. He’s lucky Farris wasn’t around or he’d have had his arse fer curtains, and Keral would be down a scout.”

Cairo made an awkward snort before wiping his nose on his shirt. Eat her? What kind of hellish nightmare was this place?

"Do I put the pieces in there?" Ka asked, indicating the pan. He had finished skinning the pumpkin and rolled up his sleeves before uncorking the gourd. In truth, he had heard the conversation as well, but he was already squeamish at the idea and did not think he wanted to hear the rest of the tale.

"Down a scout?" Cairo asked, oblivious to Ka's discomfort. "You mean he ain't dead?"

“Aye, but first slice ‘em thin-like. They’ll cook faster that way,” Saen told Ka. He looked to Yale. “Lil’ man has a point though. Never did figure out how Keral managed to keep Thrist’s neck out of a noose.”

Yale shrugged, lips pinched into a frown. “I suppose bein’ the king’s favorite has it’s perks. So long he keeps him far away from the lass, I’m content with whatever hell trek Keral sent him on.”

Saen turned to Cairo. “Ye see, Thrist is a blue coat ranger. Ye might ‘a spotted one or two of ‘em here and abouts, but mostly they’re out in the provinces and the wilds, keepin’ an eye on things and reportin’ back to Keral who then reports to the King. He’s the captain of the Blue Rangers. Back when the Blood King was still alive, they were a bunch of murdering thugs. But since Keral took over, he’s been tryin’ to bring the order back to its original purpose.”

“He’s also Farris’s brother,” Nenani added.

"Brother," Ka muttered under his breath. There was a wafer-thin sneer on his face that faded as he shook his head. He hollowed out the pumpkin with a finger, holding the orange guts in his palm for a moment before holding them out. "You keep the seeds?" he spoke up in a kinder tone.

"And Farris would have wrent him limb from limb," Cairo said slowly, watching Yale's face as he said it.

“I’m sure he has his reasons, but I can’t say I wouldn’t have paid good coin to see that,” Yale replied. He sighed in resignation. “But Keral isn’t a bad sort, even if his men are pieces of walking rubbish. Probably the most cheerful man in the whole castle. Until ye make him mad and then he looks a lot more like Farris.”

“And his whiskey is top shelf. Got a bottle of it fer my nameday a few years back. But careful," Saen added. He gave Cairo a wink. "It’s got one hell of a kick.”

Ka adjusted his seat, still unsure what to do with the pumpkin guts in his hand. Finding no better place to put them, he tossed the glob into the fire and went to slicing up the pumpkin on the table.

Meanwhile, Cairo put a hand to his heart. "What! You take me for a drunkard? No, no, no no no," he waved both hands before himself. "Lost my uncle to the devil juice," he declared.

“Apologies,” Saen replied, shamefaced, and he raised his hands to placate the human. “Meant no offense. Sorry fer yer loss there, lad.”

Ka promptly knocked the man over with a knuckle. "Dirty liar."

"Hey!" he spat, brushing the dirt from his person as he got up.

The giant turned to meet Sean's eyes. "He likes mead. Had to carry him home half the time-- hey! Don't kick me! Old fart."

"You didn't let me finish," the human growled, glaring up at him. "I had him right where I wanted, too."

"Saen is nice, you shouldn't do that to him," Ka said plainly. This earned him another kick in the shin.

Saen recovered from his surprise quickly, looking to Yale with a haughty grin. “Ye hear that, Yale? I’m nice.”

Yale had grabbed up some of the sliced pumpkins and tossed them onto the pan with a knob of butter, and they began to sizzle. He waved the wooden spoon at his fellow and retorted, “Only ‘cause he’s never seen ye lose at the pebble toss. Or yer tantrum afterwards.”

“Ah, I don’t lose that often,” Saen replied, suddenly defensive.

“Well, the three shillings I won off ye last month say otherwise,” Yale replied as he turned his attention back to the frying pumpkin. He abruptly turned back to Saen as a memory suddenly resurfaced. “And then there was the time ye bit Kol.

“Oi. He stole my sausage,” Saen replied with a frown. “Fair punishment fer the crime.”

“Well, I think you’re nice,” Nenani said and Saen turned to smile at her.

“Why thank you,” he said.

“Even if you bite people,” she added with a grin.

Saen’s smile drooped and he held his arms out in exasperation. “It was one time, and I was drunk off my arse!”

Had Ka been wrong? Maybe his first impression had been right. They were not being rude, at least not to him, but it reminded him how little he knew. He was just an outsider, after all, so decided to keep his mouth shut for a little while. Since Yale had deemed his sliced pumpkin worthy of the frying pan, he regarded the small pile of gourds and wondered just how many pies they planned on making. He shrugged, taking another pumpkin and tossed end over end a up a couple times before setting to peeling again.

Cairo, however, had no such convictions. "You," he said, hammering a finger at Saen, "I like you." He crossed the lawn towards him, much to Ka's dismay. "So what's this about the king's whiskey," he paused, recollecting, "and what the ripe devil is a nameday, for that matter?"

Saen began slicing up more pumpkins but paused at Cairo’s question, regarding the human with a look of horror.

“Ye mean ye don’t have namedays where yer from?” Saen asked. “To celebrate ye bein’ a year older?”

The human squinted up at him. "It's a birth-day, you fool. Because it was the day you were...?" He shrugged. "Unless you hatched from an egg. I suppose you do look a bit like a lizard, then."

Saen slid his knife through the flesh of the pumpkin and paused, staring off into space as he realized the silly mistake he had made. “Oh. Birthdays...huh. Yeah, those.”

Off to the side, Nenani laughed. Saen sent a brief glare her way, but it left soon as it came and he moved on. “As fer the whiskey, it’s ain’t the king’s. Keral’s a bit famous fer his whiskey round here. He doles it out to those he deems worthy of it every once in a while. Farris may still have a bottle. Ask ‘im nice like and he may give ye a nip.”

“Best wait till end of day though,” Yale advised in good humor. “We ain’t bluffin’ about it havin’ a right kick. And we don’t need ya wanderin’ ‘round only fer ye to lose yer footin’ and fall arse end into the fire.”

Saen snickered. “Yeah, just ask Jae."

"Mmh," Cairo grumbled, waving his hand. "Never been one to ask nicely myself." He knocked twice on Saen's shin.

At the motion, Ka watched the man with round eyes and slowly shook his head back and forth. Still, Cairo did not seem to care, and repeated the motion.

Saen looked down curiously and titled his head. “May I be of assistance?”

By now, Ka was visibly shaking his head, openly nervous. The human either did not notice or simply ignored him. "Up, I said," Cairo laughed. He eyed the orange stains on his hand. "Wipe your grubby hands off first, mind you. I don't want to smell like rotten fruit in an hour."

“Oh. Alright then,” said the cook, pleasantly surprised. He sat his knife down and roughly wiped his hands onto his apron before bending down. There was a moment’s hesitation as Saen tried to think of the best way of picking the man up. Unlike Nenani, Cairo was an adult and therefore taller and with considerably more heft to him. In the end, he used the same technique he employed with the little girl, which was to shove his hands under the human’s arms and lift him up. Perhaps it was simply that he was more accustomed to the weight of a small human child, but Saen was a little taken aback by just how much heavier Cairo was. Though really he shouldn’t have been. He did his best to not let it show on his face as he lifted the man onto a clean spot on the table.

Cairo winced a bit as the giant pinched the old wound in his ribs. Once set down, he let out a puff of air and brushed himself off. "Boy you got little girly hands, don't you?"

"Cairo..." Ka warned, though this time did not bother to look up. His stomach rumbled again, and it was then he remembered the pies Yale had brought. He hurried to finish skinning the pumpkin.

Saen tucked his hands under his armpits and pouted. “...don’t have girly hands...”

From the fire pit, Yale started to laugh.

The human took a bow. "My apologies, Princess. Would you like me to kiss your ring?"

With a sudden devilish smirk, Saen grabbed a piece of sliced pumpkin and pushed his ring finger through it and then shoved it in Cairo’s face. “Go on then.”

Yale turned to Ka. “Sorry about that one. I’d say he’s normally not like this...but I’d be lying.”

The big man shrugged. "Don't apologise to me yet. Mine may do worse," he said as he chopped up the pumpkin on the table. Just as he said it, Cairo pricked up as though offended.

"What!" he growled, scrunching up his face at the slimy vegetable.

The human's mood seemed to change then, and he put on a mask of haughtiness. "Your grace, I was only jesting! I wouldn't dare touch thine ring. Tis too great an honor for a lowlife such as myself... but if you insist--" He then took not the ring finger, but Saen's middle finger, and bowed before it. Cairo then proceeded to stick his tongue out and lick the knuckle.

“Oi now!” Saen snapped loudly, pulling back his hand in disgust, but the force of the movement caused his pumpkin ring to fly off of his hand and up into the air. And when it came back down again, it landed on top of Ka’s head.

The little man roared with laughter, while his giant friend was left with a sticky bit of pumpkin in his hair. Ka sat there a moment, eyes distant and unmoving. At last he drew a deep breath, let it out slow, and deadpanned, "Your highness, I think you have lost your ring."

Nenani covered her mouth with her hands to stifle a giggle, looking back and forth between them. Saen drew a breath to make a retort when a bellow sounded from the archway.

“I’M HEARIN’ A LOT ‘A TALKIN’ AND NOT A LOT ‘A WORKIN!”

Both Saen and Yale, more than accustomed to Farris’s hollering, turned their focus to their work. Nenani, still growing use to the sheer volume her guardian voice could achieve, was startled badly and jumped.

Ka gasped and hunched his shoulders at the sound. "Sorry!" he squeaked, though he knew the man could not hear him. He took the pumpkin from his head and pitched it into the fire. It had been a fairly solid piece, but his hair was still sticky in places from the stuff. Cairo, he noticed, had not budged other than to turn in the direction of the voice and square his shoulders as if to fight.

The giant then caught sight of Nenani still pulling herself together. "Are you okay, little one?" Ka murmured.

She blinked up at him and then nodded with a small sheepish smile. “Yeah. I’m still getting used to how loud Farris gets sometimes.”

“Bit of a wonder we ain’t all deaf,” Yale murmured to Ka with a suppressed grin.

“Do you ever yell like that?” Nenani asked Ka. The question came more from a curiosity about Ka’s height. Farris was one of the taller giants she had met and Ka towered over him. If Ka were to get as angry, she wondered if he was that loud.

Ka glanced from Nenani to Yale and then back again. He shook his head as he reached for one of the pies. He hesitated, remembering Farris's call, and chose to grab another pumpkin instead. "I haven't raised my voice since I was a boy," he admitted. "People get nervous when I use my normal voice, so I try to be quiet."

"Y'ain't that bad," Cairo growled.

Yale gave Ka a strange look. “Nervous? Why would they be nervous? I agree with yer brother. That’s plain stupid. What’s other people’s business if yer voice is a tad loud?” Yale gave Ka an appraising look. “Fer as tall as ye are, ye don’t seem to care fer the attention.”

“I always thought it would be really inconvenient to be really tall,” Nenani mused. She had found a small rock on the ground and had picked it up and was idly passing it between her hands.

Saen laughed and replied, “We could say the same fer ya small folk being so short. Ye get winded just climbin’ the damn stairs.”

Ka shrugged at Yale's question, but found the words strengthened him a bit. Even if the man was a giant in his own respect, it felt good to hear some encouragement on the subject. "You are... much more confident than I," he decided.

The giant shook his head as he peeled. His voice got quiet and apprehensive. "I've scared people before. Humans, mostly. I don't like it." He forced a laugh. "Maybe I worry too much."

Cairo picked his teeth. Upon finding something, he pulled it out on his fingernail, then stuck it back in his mouth. "Sure do," he grumbled. He turned to Sean and curled his lip. "I don't have to climb your stairs, midgey boy."

Saen grinned and poked the human’s middle. “Maybe ye should start,” he quipped.

Near the pit, Yale was considering Ka with a little more of a critical eye. He took the sight of him in and his words and pieced more of the puzzle together. He understood easily the apprehension that came with interacting with humans, though he and the rest of the staff and Farris all made jokes and snarky remarks about popping them into stews and pies. It was all a balm against the festering wounds left behind by the war. It was easy to joke to and make light of it all. It was their morbid way to reconcile with the very real evils they had done. That Farris had done for them. To save them. But Yale held himself just as responsible as Farris. No matter what the kitchen master told him. He too remembered those faces...

He looked to Nenani then, who was watching them with an open curiosity. Innocent. She knew only bits and pieces, and even then, he wasn’t sure she knew anything of the whole truth. If she did, she never let on.

He took the slices of cooked pumpkin and dropped them into a shallow earthenware dish. Staring at the other slices still sizzling along the hot metal pan, he spoke to Ka.

“Didn’t use to be. Confident I mean,” Yale admitted to him. “When I was younger. Durin’ the war and all. Scared a lot of humans in my life. And I'm talkin' real terror. Wasn’t my choice to do it, but I did.”

Ka was silent for a moment, trying to think over Cairo's angry exchange with Saen. The humans here had been foolish enough to wage war with the giants? Behind that, what had they done to deserve their wrath? He shook his head and decided to ignore it. "I... haven't had to kill anyone, fortunately. There was that one, erm, accident with a dragon rider, but..." Ka shrugged as he rolled the pumpkin over in his palm, unsure how to finish his sentence.

He then glanced over to where Nenani stood and recalled how protective Yale had been of her. If so much had happened to him, how had he recovered so well? He himself had been a mess the time he had hurt Cairo. Then again... "I suppose there are bad humans just as there are bad giants," he finished.

Yale nodded with grim understanding at Ka’s words. There was no need for him to say anything else as his meaning was plain as well as his regret. It only served to confirm in Yale’s mind the kind of man he was and it brought forth a feeling of smug contentment. He wasn’t always as good a judge of character as Farris, but he wasn’t bad either. He felt pride in knowing his initial assessment of Ka had been right.

#crossover with doobdles

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ellana-ravenwood · 5 years ago

Text

An AU in which Bruce Wayne raises Damian since birth - Ficlets

I wrote a small post about this not long ago (click here to take a look at it), and it made me wanna write more about this alternate universe...So here we are. It’s not a very original AU, but eh, there’s a reason people wanna write about it because damn <3. This is more like, a collection of little scenes and moments than a real story, but ya know. I just wanted to expand. I hope you will like it :

PART 2

My master list : @ella-ravenwood-archives

_________________________________________________

******

The Beginning.

Bruce was most certainly not ready to have a child.

He wasn’t even sure he ever wanted one, given the path he decided to follow.

But the decision was taken out of his hand the day Talia decided to do what she did.

Bruce was most certainly not ready to have a child.

But he would never leave a kid in the hands of the Al’Ghuls. The gods only knew what they would do to him. What they could turn him into !

What if the kid grew up, and came to Gotham to defy his father ? Would Bruce be ready to fight his own child ?

If he had to, he told himself.

And maybe that’s what would’ve happened if he never heard of it. If he never knew...

But he knew. He knew that what Talia mentioned to him once, she actually did.

And there was no way he would ever let that boy be raised by the Al’Ghuls, now that he knew he existed. Wether he was ready to have a child or not.

Never, never, armed with the knowledge she did go ahead and made that baby, would he not do anything. It wasn’t like him, to leave untied knots. Or to leave someone he knew was in need...

There was no way that boy would have a good childhood, with the Al Ghuls. Particularly with Ras’ around. Not that Bruce was sure the child could have a good life with him...But between the pest and cholera ?

It if was only Talia. If it was just her love. If she hadn’t told him why she wanted a child with him...Maybe he would’ve left the boy behind.

But his informant was adamant. The talks going on amongst the League were all the same.

Ras Al’Ghul’s heir was brought to this world only for one purpose.

And maybe what Talia felt for Bruce was genuine love. Maybe what he felt for her at the time was too. But she told him the real reason why she chose him, and why she wanted his child.

“He’ll be a new Alexander.”

She said...And although Bruce was most definitely not ready to have a kid, he would never let that happen. He would never let his own child grow up in such an environment.

Maybe if he never knew...Maybe if he never knew things would’ve been completely different. Maybe it’d avoid him a lot of trouble, too.

But he knew. And he wasn’t about to let that kid...His kid, suffer a childhood he knew was not going to be happy. After all, Talia told him what Ras used to force her to do when she was younger...

************

Sneaking into the Shadow League’s headquarter was ridiculously easy. Which made him suspicious. Maybe they were expecting him ?

Oh but they couldn’t...They couldn’t know he knew. They couldn’t know he left behind a friend, the only one he made in the league of assassin. A fellow apprentice. A friend who spied on the Al Ghuls unbeknownst to them (or he would be dead since a long time).

Bruce silently entered what he knew to be the baby’s room, and looked around. He was right, his informant was right. The crib was in the middle of the richly decorated room. Bruce, with light steps, walked towards it.

And...

It was like being faced with a portrait of himself at that age. Except the boy’s skin was darker, his eyes shaped more like almonds, and Bruce could guess that if he just opened said eyes...they would be olive green like his mother’s.

And he was right.

The soft rustling sound Bruce made as he bended over the crib to pick the little one up woke him. And he opened his eyes wide immediately.

He did not cry, instead, he looked up at this stranger that was picking him up with curiosity, and Bruce felt his heart...Do something.

He couldn’t quite describe it, the feeling. His heart skipped multiple beats, while going faster at the same time. And he wanted to smile.

It was an urge too hard to resist, something he couldn’t control while he learned to control his own emotions, and he smiled at the little one in his arms, taking a gloved fingers to his cheek to caress it lightly, as if it was natural.

The baby...he...he...

He smiled in return. A cute, unsure and untrained smile, as if it was his-

“That is his first smile.”

Talia. She was there, at the entrance of the room, casually walking in in as if nothing was happening.

“Hello, detective.”

She took Bruce by surprise, and he turned around quickly, taking a fighting stance while holding his son against his chest protectively. His hands naturally held him, one supporting his back, the other his head, even as his legs spread apart, ready to fight.

Bruce had fought only with lower body before. He trained to be able to do so. He knew he could have a chance against Talia. That he had no chance of taking her down, but could at least escape her. Fight if need be. But he’d rather avoid it...Not in front of their child.

Wasn’t Bruce here to take the boy away from violence and pain ? He couldn’t fight his own mother in front of him, even if of course, the baby would most likely not remember.

Maybe he was an unwanted child on Bruce’s end, and one Talia created only for a specific purpose...but he was still a child.

His child.

“I will not let you raise him, Talia. And if you want to stop me I will have to-”

“I don’t.”

There was something odd, in Talia’s eyes, that Bruce had a hard time to discern in the dark room, only lit by the moon.

Was it...Sadness ? Regrets, perhaps ?

“His name is Damian. From the Greek word Damianos, which means “to tame.” He is upposed to be the tamer of the World. At least, that’s what my father wants.”

“I won’t let you-”

“Redundant, detective. Even more so since I told you I will not stop you. I think the fact I let your little friend, the one who told you about Damian’s existence, live, should be proof enough. I let him go, if you’re wondering where he is. I told him to disappear, and if he’s smart enough, he will. I knew since the beginning, he was your friend. Even as he acted like he tried to kill you during your escape. I knew because I know you. I watched you close enough...”

There was a small silence, during which neither of them moved. Damian, still in his father’s arms, cooed happily as he was trying to grab at the Batman’s armor.

Finally, Bruce spoke :

“...Why ?”

Another silence. Talia did not look at Bruce, but at the tiny being slowly moving in his arms. After what seemed an eternity, punctuated by Damian’s little happy and unaware sounds, she said :

“Because I do not wish for him to become me. Or my father.”

“But, that is why you created him ?”

“That is why I-...When it happened, I imagined you would be around, detective.”

“You couldn’t seriously think I would stay after knowing what you and your father were up to ? You know me better than that, no ?”

“I do. I guess it was all wishful thinking.”

Another silence. Heavy.

“When you left I was angry. And lonely. So...I made him. Our plan was to raise him to become even better than us, and then send him to you. Because if he destroyed you, then he could destroy everything - bitter laugh - I say “our”, but I truly mean my father’s plan. Twisted and nonsensical, I see it now.”

Bruce felt uneasy, and nostalgic. The boy was getting used to being held by this odd man, and now was sucking at his foot thoughtfully (as thoughtfully as a 3 months old baby can).

“I did love you, Detective. And I would’ve gladly govern the world with you, and our son. But you leaving, you telling me all those things...It made me realize. I have never truly been loved before. This is why I was so angry when you left. No one, no one loved me before you. My father...I serve a purpose to him. When I was with you, I felt love, and loved. But before...Before I was just another instrument in my father’s grand schemes of things. Has he ever loved my mother ? He said he did. Maybe he did. But he did not keep her with him. And I became what I am today. Now, I am no fool, detective. I unfortunately know I cannot change. But Damian...Damian has a chance, with you.”

Bruce didn’t know what to say. His heart and throat felt tight, and his hold on the boy became stronger and surer.

“Please, let me say goodbye ?”

Of course, Bruce agreed.

He watched Talia slowly walking to him, and looking at the boy.

Her boy.

The boy she knew she had to let go, because she loved him enough to want him to not become her. Or his grandfather.

Talia never loved anyone before. Except for her “detective”, and for her son...

“One day, my heart. One day, I hope we can meet again. Goodbye, Damian.”

She told the little one, and the baby looked at her, smiling widely as he recognized the voice of his mother. She laid a kiss on his forehead, took a last glance at him, and left the room without turning back.

Bruce left the headquarter with his crying son in his arm, sure now, that if it had been that easy to get into it...it was because Talia herself, lowered the security.

************

Damian Wayne, son of Batman. Occupation : Baby.

Bruce was right. He was NOT ready to be a father. He never even held a baby, in his short twenty three years of life ! Why would he anyway ?!

Thanks god for a certain man called Alfred Pennyworth.

The butler, whom Bruce considered a second father know, slowly showed him the ropes and tricks to take care of a baby, trying to involve his young master in everything as much as he could because...What was the point in saving that little boy from a world of pain and violence, if it was to not take care of him ?

And so there were times Alfred told him to take care of things on his own. Which Bruce wasn’t sure he liked, so far...

But he was trying. He was really trying.

The arrival of Damian in his life put so many plans he had in shamble, but Bruce learned how to adapt fast.

Of course, the news of Bruce Wayne having a “secret son” spread like a wild fire all across Gotham. And he knew there was no hiding such a thing. What was the point of hiding the boy anyway, he couldn’t raise him and keep him shut in the Manor all his life !!

The public was quick to believe the story he told. Of course, no one had trouble to picture playboy Bruce Wayne who was known to sleep around, having a “secret” son. In fact, many talked about bets going all around the city as to when a scandal of the sort would happen.

Bruce had been back home for about a year, and in that short year, he made sure to assure his “Brucie Wayne” persona, that he knew would help him keep Batman a secret.

He most definitely did not expect Damian, but was quick to find a plan. His explanation about him satisfied everyone. A story about how Damian’s mother could not take care of him, and he wanted to take his responsibilities...

Which technically wasn’t a lie.

The story stayed at the front of every newspapers for a long time, and Bruce decided to play on it and, although he felt a little ashamed, use his son for a publicity stunt, and therefor have even more cover for his Batman activity.

He was often shown in public, with a baby carrier, or exiting an important meeting early to go see his boy. Which he did. And he couldn’t help but have a feeling that this little boy, his little boy...sort of saved him.

Bruce felt that without Damian, he would’ve jump heart and soul into this Batman thing. And he did, he promised his parents he would...So of course, he did. But there was always this little piece of reality holding him back.

His little boy cooing at him, and smiling at him, and laughing and having this second chance at life. Which gave him, too, a second chance at life.

Of course, Bruce could not forget the years of pain he dragged behind, the trauma of losing his parents. But he felt that Damian, and his presence so early on in his life ? Most definitely changed him.

For the better.

************

The first dirty diaper.

“Alfred ? ALFRED ? Alllllfreeeeeeeeeed ?!”

Bruce screamed, while running around the manor, panicked, holding baby Damian against him. The boy was giggling happily, liking how his father’s running steps made him rock as he held him against his chest, a terrible smell following them around…

Bruce took a break from work today, giving his favorite excuse : “He had to take care of his son.”, but of course, babies being babies...Bruce really thought his boy was focusing on the pictures he was showing him, certain his son was a genius, up until the odor coming from the kid’s diaper informed him that no; Damian was not focusing on the pictures his father was showing him.

When Bruce entered the kitchen, in which Alfred was preparing dinner, the foul smell told the butler instantly what the problem was. Turning around to face Bruce, he says, with his infamous English phlegm :

“I think it’s time for you to learn how to change a diaper, Master Bruce. I have done it for the first few weeks, because you had very few sleep, but you cannot escape this anymore. Come on, master Bruce, I will show you.”

Bruce’s face fell, and Alfred gave him a rather sneaky smile. Well. It really was time his master learned how to change a diaper. After all, Bruce did say he would take care of this child so he could have a good life...

************

The hair incident.

The first time Bruce tried to put clothes on his son all alone, without the help of Alfred, it ended in a disaster.

The fearless Batman was most definitely not prepared for how squirmy babies really are. He had been fighting for a good ten minutes with his son’s legs before he started to mutter :

“I’d rather be fighting every single goons in Gotham right now, ah Damian please just -Damian kicked one of his leg up while the other one went down- no wait -The boy did the same thing, but changing leg this time- just stay still a second -this time, he put both his legs up, trying to grab one of his foot to put it in his mouth - oh my god..”

As soon as he was able to slide one of the baby’s leg into his pants, and trying to put the other on...Damian would squirm his little legs around and undo everything. Cooing at his father continuously, as if talking to him. Taunting him that he was doing it wrong !

He decided to try another approach, and moved on the side of the kid, holding his legs down and bending above him to try to block the boy’s legs long enough, without hurting him, to...Oh, but he bended forward a little too much and...The kid got a hand on his hair.

Unhappy of the sudden restraint, Damian let a loud “HA !” out, but before starting to cry got distracted by his father’s head being close and...Right there, in reach. What were those funny wiggly thing on his head ?

“ALFREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

The butler rushed in, afraid something bad happened to the baby...Only to find his young master Bruce, his body bend in an awkward position as he tried as gently as possible to untie his son’s hands from his hair...not succeeding very much.

After this, Bruce started to wear his hair shorter, and neatly brushed back, and left behind any stylish haircut he thought would be good for his public persona.

************

Damian Wayne, Son of Batman AND little brother to Robin. Occupation : Baby AND little brother.

Damian was home with Alfred, when Bruce first met Dick. (IMPORTANT AUTHOR’S NOTE : I took an age “canon” diverging from my personal preference so it would fit the story. I usually like the pre-crisis version the best, where Dick is 8 years old when Bruce takes him as his ward, because it calls back to Bruce’s own age when he lost his parents...But for the sake of this story, and to fit closer the “actual” ages of the boys even if it won’t be perfect (then again AU), I’ll go with post-crisis “official” age which is around 12 years old. Not 15 though, like in the New 52, that’s too old...anyway it seems like Rebirth went back to around 9/10 when Bruce takes him in but yeah, ya know...12, so it fits better. But my personal preference is little baby 8 years old Dick coming in. Haha thought it was worthy of mentioning, and also anticipating any age question :), more explanation about ages in my AN at the end of this fic).

It was about three months in since Bruce brought Damian back with him, it seemed like...A good idea ? To adopt a twelve years old child who just went through the same trauma he did, while being a 23 years old still struggling to know how to be a father.

But a twelve years old would be easier to handle than a baby, right ?

Wrong.

Dick had some hard days, at the beginning, in Wayne Manor. The media had put in his head that he was a publicity stunt, that Bruce didn’t really care, and he would suddenly lash out at times, the pain too grand.

Bruce understood more than anyone else.

He too, lashed out at Alfred a lot when he was younger. It is normal, when you’re so young and already felt so much pain...

Oddly enough, it’s Damian, that ended up calming Dick.

The baby, now about six months old, was starting to crawl all around, and took a grand interest in that newcomer.

Dick would try to isolate himself somewhere at times, playing his game boy in a corner of the main living room...Only for a little six months old to laboriously crawl to him and try to climb on him.

Thanks to Damian’s presence, Dick opened up surprisingly fast. Bruce suspected the boy’s personality was already quite cheery, but he also clearly had a little dark side to him...However, only because the media were spreading lies about Bruce. And his reasons to take the boy in.

As Dick saw how Bruce took care of his baby son, he slowly opened up and trusted that the man truly wanted to give him a home.

Of course, Bruce would never replace his parents...But he still could be his new dad. The two weren’t inclusive. Dick would never forget his beloved parents, but was lucky to still have people who loved him around.

And that baby ? He was clearly very much set on bonding with him anyway. Wherever Dick seemed to go, the little cooing noises Damian did and the sound of him crawling on the floor would follow.

And it warmed Dick’s heart. He’d let the baby fall asleep in his arms, or come and sit next to him, watching what he was doing with great curiosity.

Damian even took the bad habit of crying, just so that Dick would come and take care of him (he also did that to his father and Alfred, to be fair). And it worked every time. As soon as Damian would make a sound, Dick would be here.

The rare times Bruce scolded Dick for something bad he did, Damian would become mad and scream at his father. In fact, his very first words, right after his first birthday, was “no dada”, as he scolded his father for telling Dick he needed to focus more in school.

The little twelve months old would hug his older brother tight against his heart, and tell his father off.

“No dada no !”

Sometimes, it would make Bruce laugh. Sometimes, it would infuriate him...How dare, his authority, undermined by a one year old ! Then again, he never really minded. All he ever wanted, was for his sons to be happy.

And to be fair, ever since Dick truly decided to settle for this new life, he rarely made mistakes worthy of scolding. Dick was a really sweet boy. And Bruce didn’t believe in being angry at his children anyway, he understood very fast that this was doing the opposite of what he wished it’d do.

It didn’t take long enough to Bruce to realize that giving love to his children meant receiving it back. Being angry with them without explaining anything meant frustration on all side. So of course, he wouldn’t let them do bad things. But Bruce found that they’d actually rarely act out, when he was trying to be understanding and make them see what they did wrong...

Bonding with Damian, and becoming real brothers. Becoming very close, is what gave Dick a new hope. Of course, Bruce’s unconditional love and care did too, but the first thing that made him open up, the first thing that made him want to have a new family...It was this little baby, who decided himself that he was his big brother now.

************

The Solid Food incident.

Damian was starting to eat solid food.

Well. Solid food. More like mushed food, but still a step forward from the formula milk and baby bottle.

But right now, Damian was having a fit.

He absolutely refused to eat his mushed pees and chicken that Alfred made in the “baby cook”. And it was getting late. Bruce was about to leave for the Batcave, and it was getting close to Damian’s bed time.

But the boy wasn’t having it. Any of the techniques Bruce used failed, including the infamous “the airplane is coming”.

“I don’t think he likes it, B.”

Dick said, smiling a little too widely as he looked at Bruce struggling with his boy. Which gave a sudden idea to the man. His last idea, really.

What monkey sees, monkey does, right ?

“Look Damian, look here. Daddy loooooves the food, see.”

And he gulped down the spoon of mushed food. And oh god, it was probably the most disgusting thing Bruce ever ate in his life. What was this ? Why would anyone expect someone to eat this monstrosity ?! Was this really baby food ?

The face Bruce made didn’t fool Dick, nor did it Damian. The little toddler gave a look to his father that clearly meant, “see ?!”, and Dick bursted out laughing and almost choked on his own dinner.

That night, Bruce relented and just gave Damian his favorite food : apple sauce. As much as he wanted. Telling both his boys to “not tell Alfred about this”.

************

The day Superman changed his opinion on Batman... But he didn’t know it was Batman.

At the time, Clark still had a rather poor opinion of Bruce Wayne, whom he didn’t know yet was Batman.

And it was totally not because he shortly dated Lois Lane ! Nope, not at all ! He just couldn’t stand Bruce’s guts and smug face.

But he had to admit his actions were praiseworthy. In fact, today, he came from Metropolis to this godforsaken city that Gotham was, for an interview about a recent charity Bruce started. A charity that did some good all across the USA, and was worthy of reporting in the Daily Planet.

The journalist was ready to act fake and smile a lot, while really wanting to punch the billionaire in the face. He really didn't like how this Bruce Wayne acted always so sure of himself and...grr...If only he knew he was Superman ! He wouldn’t act the same, for sure.

So it’s with a huge surprise, that he came into the man’s office, and surprised him as he was playing with his young son.

Right there, on the floor, he saw THE Bruce Wayne, a grown ass man, acting absolutely silly to make his baby laugh.

The little boy was giggling loudly as his father was making funny faces at him, and Bruce wasn’t noticing the newcomers at all, as he kept going, too enthralled in the moment, too focused on playing with his boy. After all, he had a rather busy week and barely any time to spend quality time with his children, lately, so this was the perfect occasion for him...

If only he didn’t forget about Clark Kent’s interview.

“I’m so sorry Mr. Wayne, I thought you weren’t busy !”

Bruce jumps a little, out of surprise, and turns around, his face livid as he realizes what just happened. He stands up straight quickly, and turns toward Clark and his secretary.

But the little boy on the floor whines a little and make grabby hands at him, giving him the most adorable puppy eyes Clark ever saw. The man relent, and picks his son up, turning to Clark and the secretary again.

She is visibly very embarrassed, but “Mr. Wayne” just smiles charmingly at her (why was this guy so cool ?!) and says :

“No worries Charlotte. Mistakes happen. You can go back to your office. And apologies, Mr. Kent, I did not know you were already here. Clearly.”

In a few seconds, Bruce had turned around an embarrassing situation for him and was acting all smug and arrogant again. But this time, Clark felt that there were much more to Bruce Wayne that the public image he was showing.

Flashforward to a few years later, Clark finally discovers Batman is Bruce Wayne, and he is utterly SHOOK.

************

The Family Portrait debacle.

One day, about a year after bringing Damian back, Bruce decided to have a family portrait made. Of both his sons.

He bought very fancy and cute clothes for his boys, and tried as best as he could to make Dick and Damian presentable.

Dick’s hair were unruly and there was always a little cow lick that refused to go in rank with the other hair, but it was still fine.

Damian was really unhappy to have his first haircut ever, and it had been a nightmare to try and get him into his fancy clothes.

It wasn't helping, that Dick was clearly agreeing, and talking about how itchy the clothes were. But Bruce seemed excited about this, and so he did it.

But Damian ? Oh the little boy still didn’t understand this sort of things, and as everyone already could figure out, he seemed very independent and hated to do things he didn’t wanna do.

And so, even for the Batman himself, getting his one year old son to stay still for a family picture was no easy task. Dick almost dropped his little brother many times, and they decided to sit the boys on the floor instead of a high armchair like their original ideas.

Damian wouldn’t stop squirming, and the picture ended up being a rather hilarious image on which it was very obvious Dick was struggling to keep his brother in place, and Damian was half-crying half-mad.

Later in the day however, both in cute little pajamas, the two boys fell asleep together as Dick, as he took the habit of doing, read his little brother a bed time stories and fell asleep while doing so.

Those two pictures, the “ugly” yet very funny one, and the absolutely cutest one, have a prized place on the “Wayne family” picture wall.

************

The day Dick joined the Teen Titans.

Bruce encouraged him to do so, if he truly wanted to.

Dick was sixteen now, and Bruce could see he was looking for more meaning, for more than just being his shadow.

Bruce could see the boy he came to see as his own son, as much as he saw Damian as his, needed to find more sense to it all. Needed to help more than just Gotham and its people, at least for now.

Joining and creating his own team ? With friends that had similar backgrounds to him, that felt out of place too ? Figuring things out on his own for a while ? The Batman was convinced it could only do him good.

Now many would’ve called him a bad father for letting his 16 years old son go off on his own...But many did not understand what Dick went through. Bruce did. And it would be highly hypocritical to not let Dick go for a while, when Bruce himself left Gotham around the age of 17 to go travel the world ? To train, and find meaning in it all ?

Plus, who said he wouldn’t keep an eye on his boy ? As if he was gonna let his son completely on his own. Of course, Dick didn’t need to know Bruce was totally spying on him, but...Well, Bruce couldn’t completely let go.

So yes. Bruce was behind Dick as his teen of a son had a harsh decision to make. Because it wasn't just about finding himself...There was also Damian.

Could he leave his baby brother behind ? Would the little boy understand ?

Would Dick be strong enough to go away from his family, even if he knew he needed it and it wasn’t permanent ?

Bruce knew Dick needed to go. Needed time to find himself, understand who he truly was, and move on. But Bruce also knew that he was held back by the love he had for his brother, adopted father, and adopted grandfather...

He also knew that it became vital for his boy, as he saw him more and more get lost in thoughts. Just like it was vital for him, as a seventeen years old boy, to leave Gotham to train.

And so he sat with Dick, and talked about it, keeping Damian away for a little while so that cute little toddler wouldn’t change Dick’s decision.

They wrote a pros and cons list, and the pros outweighs the cons by a little. Bruce tells his son that he has to take care of himself first, especially in regards of his mental health...

It was just for a little while anyway, and he could come back if he felt too homesick, right ? The Wayne fortune came in handy, for that. There was also the possibility of video conferences.

And so Dick joined the Teen Titans, with a heavy heart, but knowing it was for the best at that time for him.

Damian seemed quite sad at first, since he was so used to have his brother around at all time ! But as every kid, he adapted rather fast and although he asked often about “Dick”, a video conference with him was enough, as the little boy knew his brother would never abandon him and surely come back.

(---> In many stories but not in all of them (canon man...What a mess), Dick and Bruce do not see eye to eye as to which methods they should use while out there in the street, Dick thinking Bruce is much too violent etc etc...It’s sort of unclear wether Dick left or Bruce “fired” him really, but they have a pretty bad fall out and Dick leaves, leaving a Bruce that finds himself in a very dark lonely place, up until Jason comes in his life...but in this version, raising a baby and finding the light earlier in his life, I think Bruce wouldn’t be as violent, and share Dick’s views as to how they should proceed as Batman and Robin. Of course, they still beat villains’ asses. That their schtick, HOWEVER, they don’t beat them near to death ? They incapacitate them in many ways. I think if Baby Damian had been in Bruce’s life since the beginning, his Batman would’ve been much different...I mean, it’s Dick’s departure that made him change his method slightly and be less violent ? That made him question himself and reconsider ? So if he already had a child in his life before that ? One that came from his union with a certain Talia Al’Ghul ? If the all point is to save him from violence and such ? Then I think Bruce’s Batman would be different...If any of this makes sense ? Just explaining this scene for those who know the comics and are like : “wtf Ella that’s not how it went ?!” haha, AU).

************

The boy who stole the Batmobile’s tyres.

Jason was barely even twelve, when Bruce brought him back with him to the bat cave. He was a frail and wary little boy, and Bruce could only imagine what he went through...

No one just dares to steal from the Batman’s himself without a reason. And in Jason’s case, that reason was clearly survival.

He had a few scratches on his face, and bruises on his arms. Bruce didn’t want to re-open whatever trauma he went through, or ask too many questions that would make the boy uncomfortable...So he simply offered help.

A warm meal, and a place to sleep for the night. Little did he know at the time, that the boy would stay much longer than the night...

And oddly enough, the boy instantly accepted. Because someone being nice to him while he caught him stealing from him must be nice right ? Also, he heard of the Batman. He knew the good he did.

And so it all started. A simple night and a warm meal turned into official adoption papers, and the rest is history...

************

The more the merrier.

Bruce wasn't sure how Damian would take the fact that Jason was staying for good. After all, he was so close from Dick...Was Jason going to be able to find his place in his new family ?

When Bruce introduced Jason officially to Damian, the boy didn’t really react, just thinking he wouldn’t say. They played together, but Bruce wasn’t sure it stuck in his little four years old that Jason was here to stay.

So he officially stated it. Jason was adopted now, for good and...his worst fear happened. Damian took a good look at Jay, up and down, then turned around and ran away.

The poor little boy (Jason) looked absolutely crushed. He really was excited to finally have a home, his time at the Manor was the best he ever had ! And he really liked little Damian, but if he didn’t like him in return and didn’t want him in the family ? It was painful.

But then a few minutes later Damian came back, holding his two favorite toys ever, and walked straight to Jason, in a determined way, gave him the toys and said :

“Fo’ you. Zayson.”

And Jason Todd, barely twelve years old, almost cried as this little boy who was facing him did that small act of kindness. Did something that no one ever really did for him before.

Jason Todd had a new bother. And so did Damian.

************

A new brother.

Damian and Jason bonded even further once the official adoption papers went through. This made Bruce realize how strong his little boy was because... Damian clearly missed having an older brother.

He wasn’t quite acting with Jason how he acted with Dick, however. With Dick, Damian would shadow him all around, and just sit in his lap, looking at what he did.

Sometimes Dick needed to be on his own, and Damian would just wait for him, not seeking him too much, understanding ? Dick and Damian had quite a lot of years of difference.

When Dick was 12, Damian was a baby.

Jason and Damian still had quite a bit of difference, but now, Damian was four. He could play, and talk, and invent new games.

That boy was very imaginative.

And Jason ? His dream had always been to have a little brother, so he played along with everything. Where Dick enjoyed being a mature older brother who would console Damian and be there when he needed...Jason was an active older brother, who loved to play and have fun.

His childhood was clearly stunted by drama that happened in his early life, and with Damian, it was like he could live some of the years he lost again.

Not that he was acting childish, oh no, on the contrary. But he would just play along, something that Dick rarely did. Dick had other game and interest, Jason was very happy to play pretend.

Dick was the comforting, reassuring older brother.

Jason was the fun one that you could always count on and that had the best game ideas.

Maybe the fact Jason and Damian were a little closer in age played for a lot ? Probably. Or maybe Jason, who always dreamt of a brother, would just do anything to be liked by Damian.

Not that he had to try hard. Damian adored both his older brothers equally. For different reasons. Yet the love was there all the same.

More often than not, Damian would escape his bed and room, to go sneak into Jason’s bed at night, and wait for his brother to come home from patrol.

Both Jason and Bruce let him, of course, it was very cute. And Jason felt oddly safe, there, with his little brother curled up beside him ?

It was like little Damian, his precious little brother, meant home.

Bruce did too, for sure. Jason never had a dad, and he was so happy to have one that was as cool as Bruce ! But his little brother represented something he never thought he could have.

In which world would Jason Todd, little orphan living in the streets, ever have such a great little brother ? Or a chance to have a family ?

************

The good years.

Dick would often come by, while still being with the Titans. It was his eighteen birthday soon, and he wanted to show everyone his new costume...After all, he couldn’t be Robin anymore !

Jason got along really well with his older brother, and found a place in this world he never thought he would.

Bruce...Well his children eased the pain in his heart. The pain his parents’ death left behind, and that he thought would never go away. Was it bad, that every year it hurt a little less ? But seeing his children grow...

Damian was almost six now, and growing into such an intelligent little boy. Bruce couldn’t even imagine, what he would’ve gone through, if he had stayed with the Al’Ghuls.

What kind of little six years old he would be, if it happened that way...

************

Where did Jason go ?

Yes. Jason and Damian were very close. Jason instantly discovered his big brother instincts, and Damian just liked being around him. Because Jay ? He was so funny ! And always willing to play with him !! Even if know he was a big person, fifteen years old, an old man !!

And so one morning, when Damian woke up and as usual, ran from his room to Jason’s to wake him up by jumping on him...The boy found an empty room, and a bed still made.

Did Jason not come home tonight ? Odd. The first thought that crossed Damian’s mind was to then go find his dad, who would surely know where Jason was !

“Daddy ! Daddy !!”

Bruce wasn’t in bed either, which was odd but also reassuring ? It meant they probably were both downstairs, having breakfast.

But when Damian went downstairs, going down the stairs as fast as his little legs could without falling, he only found Alfred, sitting behind the kitchen counter, holding his head in his hands.

“Fafred ?”

Damian asked. He never could quite pronounce “Alfred” properly, and everyone just went along with “Fafred”, and it stuck...It was cute.

The butler jumped up in surprise, and looked at the boy sadly. Why were his eyes wet ?

“You’re hurt Fafred ?”

Damian asked, clearly very concerned. Oh. Oh sweet little boy. Alfred wasn’t sure he could handle it. Not right now. He picked the little one up, and sat him in front of him, on the counter.

Five years old little Damian, almost six ! ; Put his palm on Alfred’s forehead, and said :

“You’re not hot Fafred, what is it ? Did you fall ? Where does it hurt ? Do you want a magic kiss ? Do you need the hospital ?”

It was adorable, how worried the little one was. It was also unbearable, in this instant. How was he supposed to...What was he supposed to...??

“No, Master Damian, I did not fell.”

“You okay ? What happened ?”

“Yes, I am okay.”

“You don’t look okay. What happened ?”

“Old people problems, you know.”

Alfred couldn’t. He couldn’t say anything.

Damian looked around, and realized the kitchen was empty. No cereal bowls out, nothing. Which was odd. If Bruce and Jason weren’t in their bed, then they should be down here having breakfast ! That’s how it always was !

“Fafred, where is daddy ?”

Please Master Damian, please do not ask him this question, do not...

“Where is Zayson ?”

************

WHERE DID JASON GO ??????

Damian didn’t understand where his big brother Jason went, and why his daddy was so sad all the time now. Of course, he was happy his big brother Dick came back and seem to want to stay for good, but him too, seemed sad whenever he looked at him.

Why ? Why was Dick always on the verge of crying when his eyes fell on his little brother ? Was it...because he reminded him of Jason’s absence ?

Damian didn’t understand why everyone was sad, but it was starting to make him very sad too. His little five years old self didn’t understand why was this happening ?

He wanted Jason.

Jason always knew for sure how to make him laugh.

But nobody would tell him where Jason went, and Damian had no idea where to look first !! Maybe in the garden ? No, he went there already, and he didn’t find Jason in their tree house. Neither did he find him at their secret spot, or near the sandbox. Jason would never go near the pond, he knew it was dangerous because he always told Damian not to go.

Maybe he was in school ? Very busy so he didn’t came back yet ? Oh that was an idea ! Damian suddenly felt excited. Yes. That’s it. Jason must be still at school ! And if Damian went to wait for him at the bus stop, then he would surely appear, right ?!

Enthusiastically, Damian ran at the front door. Everyone around was too out of it to even notice what he was doing. The boy put his shoes on (on the right feet this time), and went to take the chair in the corner of the corridor, dragging it as best he could to the front door so he could hop on it and turn the knob.

He finally managed it, got down from the chair and opened the door to find...A boy about to ring the doorbell ?

“Hi there ! I’m Tim ! Is your daddy around ?”

To be continued... ---> Part 2 :) clickclickclick

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Here we go. This is part 1/2, I hope you liked it and will want more...Next part will contain more about what changed in Bruce compared to the canon timeline(s) like in more details (sorry I’m writing this very tired and slightly drunk) and more baby Damian, and the arrival, of course, of Tim, Cass, Steph, Duke etc etc...Everyone who has not appeared yet, basically :). I really hope you liked this haha, I’m so nervous...I didn’t talk about the actual BATMAN things yet because this all comes from the view of a kid who is still just 5 so far so ya know :) As usual, feedbacks and reblogs are always much appreciated!

AGES IN THIS TIMELINE (in case you are wondering) : We all know that ages in comics are a mess, especially when it comes to the Batfam. Most canon aging actually make little sense when you try to make up an ACTUAL timeline. So I guess we all have our own preferences and headcanons, which is fine again, given the state of “canon” hints and downright claims (which often contradicts each others btw). I mentioned during the story that I used a post-crisis canon for Dick that puts him around the age of 12 when he’s taken in by Bruce (but again, personal preference = 8). Which means he’s about 12 years older than Damian. He leaves for the Titans age 15/16. So it would make the age difference between him and Jay about 4 years (which is almost canon by a year less), Jay and Damian would then be 8 years apart (same, pretty close but not quite, by two years really :/ then again it depends the canon), Jay and Tim about 3 years apart (pretty much canon), so Damian and Tim about 5 years (again a little less than canon...but then you see what I mean when I say it makes little sense at times ? Hehe). Cass and Damian would be 4 years apart, Duke and Damian 2 years apart (Duke = older), Steph and Damian about 4/3 years like between Tim and Cass I guess, and well Babs is supposedly a little older than Dick so let’s say 13/14 years. Here. Hope that cleared up their age in this ALTERNATE UNIVERSE. No need to tell me what the canon age are are, we actually aren’t really sure because it changes CONSTANTLY (Damian seems to be the only one that grow up haha and only so he could join the TEEN Titans...But then he’s somehow thrown back in his age so he becomes much younger than aged 17 years old Jon ?! Really, canon age makes no sense and in the end don’t really exist hahahahahahahaha), every head canon is open :). Especially in an AU.

Also : Let’s give back to Caesar what is Caesar’s ! Thanks to @arianatheangelworld, for the many baby!Damian “imagine” asks you send that fueled my inspiration ! ^^.

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daimonhalos · 4 years ago

Text

And though it was real, it doesn't feel like it could be

Read on Ao3!

Part of Skephalo week! → Day 2 – Family (and diamonds too in a way)

Word Count: 2.421

Characters: Badboyhalo, Skeppy, (kid!)Sapnap

Pairing(s): Skephalo (up to interpretation owo)

Warning(s): Fire (tell me if I missed any)

Summary: Sapnap gets help from both their dads setting up the perfect father's day gift for each of them, while still keeping it a secret from both.

A/N: Me? Writing fluff? Mark the day on the calendar. Okay guys, gals and cooler pals, there's some sweetness ahead so be aware of that. Also, I got a little philosophical towards the end, pardon me, happens often, I hope I made any sense. Hope you enjoy!

✾

❝ It won't be long 'til you are grown

- I love you so

- I love you, too

So I'll stay right here with you. ❞

Sapnap had tugged at Skeppy's hoodie for the fourth time in a row.

« Okay, okay, you little pest. » the latter picked up his son in his arms, adjusting him before he continued to walk along a familiar path.

« Can I carry your pick? » the hope in the young boy's voice caused a smile to creep on his face as he stopped to ponder one second: all things considered, they were just going for a little stroll around – at least that was what they had told Bad – so there was no harm in allowing him that until he had to start mining himself.

It didn't take long to find a cave entrance, standing out thanks to the looming darkness that crept up the cobblestone and deepened the more you stared at it. Skeppy let Sapnap down, branding his sword and pickaxe for good measure.

« Now, first I'm going to clear out the entrance from possible mobs, then we can proceed with our torches. » he sat down a crafting table, leaving his son to his favourite part of the job: lighting sticks up.

A little more than a year or so earlier, Sapnap had begun showing the first signs of fire magic, surely not to their surprise; that had granted them a trip to the nether, which allowed the kid to come to terms with the flames easier than how he had been stumbling his way through sparkles in the overworld.

Skeppy had shot a shocked look at Bad when he oh so nonchalantly let Sapnap fall into lava, all wide eyes and panic rising to his chest. His heart had certainly stopped for several seconds, but his companion only stared at the fluid substance as though he were expecting something, a grin stapled on his face.

And then Sapnap had risen above the surface, body completely unaltered, giggling and making his way across the reddish-yellow sea.

He was sure it had taken multiple minutes, a couple of which were simply him yelling at Bad for the lack of warnings, and various check-ups on the child before he could have been entirely convinced he had just witnessed all of that.

There Sapnap was now, confidently working with fire in the overworld, currently on his quest to get his other dad the prettiest gift he could muster with Skeppy's help.

The latter had gone a couple of steps into the cave, making a path for them to follow where mobs couldn't have reached before returning to his son, grabbing a handful of the torches he prepared.

« Let's light up our path, so we don't get lost, okay? »

« Mhm! »

Really, it was far too adorable: Skeppy's torches were followed by a trail of other ones placed at a far shorter height. The kid's free hand had been lit up the entire time too, a sort of signal to notice when they were running out of light source.

« Dad, look! » Sapnap pointed towards the ground, shimmering diamonds wedged in the stone right below their eyes.

« This early? That's a first. » a smile crept on the boy's face as Skeppy ruffled his hair. « I should bring you here more often if you get this lucky. »

The kid's eyes shone brighter than the gems around them. « Will you? »

The man seemed to consider for a dramatically long moment. « Nah. »

« Oh, come on! »

« I know you want to, Napi, but I can literally hear Bad yelling at me from the future. »

Sapnap grumbled something under his breath about “never letting him have fun” and “just wanting to help”, which caused an amused look on his dad's part.

After collecting the last remaining diamonds and some redstone because “that's one of dad's favourite colours”, they made their way back home, definitely not stopping in the middle of the forest because oh my gosh is that a nether portal?

« Don't even think about it. »

« But dad, we need something more! »

« I don't think netherrack works for a bracelet, Napi. »

« No, no, no. » Sapnap stopped in his tracks, pulling the hand he had been holding towards him. « We need netherite! »

That made Skeppy do a double-take, before turning around and kneeling down to meet his son's eyes. « Sapnap, I am not going to risk our lives for- »

« Are you scared? »

That damned smirk.

« Wow. » Skeppy sat back up. « You know the piglins don't like me, it's a sensitive topic. » he pretended to be offended, but felt the umpteenth tug on his arm.

« Pretty please? » now. Now a specific thing about raising a kid with someone, is that they're eventually going to pick up someone's antics. And, really, none had asked the little kid to pick up Bad's puppy eyes so well, but there he was, making Skeppy doomed to agree with him.

He checked on his pickaxe's status. « We go in, we take some quartz and then we leave, okay? »

Sapnap nodded heavily, expression determined, before sprinting to the portal.

Skeppy didn't have the time to reach him to get to the other side together, that he stopped for a moment, as the kid slowly disappeared before him.

« Love you, dad! »

His heart melted, just like the first time he heard that, or the second, like the time he comforted him after getting hurt, or sleep-drunk after a nightmare. It always softened him.

Skeppy followed after him and decided that, maybe, a trip to hell may have been a little worth it.

By the time they reached home, the sky had begun to darken and the figure of a concerned demon hurried over the entrance of their abode, decreasing his height to meet his family properly.

« What took you so long? » with an arm already secured around Sapnap as he lifted him up, Bad took some of Skeppy's tools to free him of the weight.

« It's a secret! » the kid revealed, shaking a leather sachet in one of his hands mischievously.

The demon's face fell. « Did you guys go mining? » it was kind of funny how his voice could become so high-pitched with disbelief despite his, at first glance, terrifying looks.

Skeppy shrugged as Sapnap freed himself from the half-hug of his dad, snagging the tools out of his hand to place them down in a chest and run to the kitchen afterwards. « Like he said, it's a secret. »

Bad walked towards him, giving him a once-over while grimacing. « You don't look too good, either. » he pressed his lips on the other's temple to check for any temperature rise, leaving a quick kiss afterwards. « Did you stay too long under the sun? »

« I'm just fatigued, no worries. » he gifted him a smile not to concern him further. « I'm going to nap for a while to fix that. »

The moment Bad stepped in the kitchen, he found a very pensive Sapnap staring up at the ingredients placed messily on the cupboards.

« Well, hello, chef Pandas. » he knew how much his son loved it when he messed around with the little voices he could make. « What are you going to delight us with today? »

« I want to make a beach picnic for dad! »

His eyes lit up. « That does sound very nice, may I assist? »

« Yeah! I can cook food up! »

« Sure Pandas, maybe when you learn not to get hurt first. »

It was an eventful evening of packing up different delicacies for that day's dinner, along with everything needed to set it down and protect it from undesired sand.

The surprise trip hadn't been that much of a surprise for Skeppy, as he knew exactly the direction towards which they were heading, having learnt it by heart thanks to the numerous amount of times they spent at the beach, even before they had let Sapnap in their family.

It had all fallen into a quiet tranquillity, after they mob-proofed the area and were done eating, telling each other sea-related stories.

« Like that one time your dad tried to stand still on a boat and ended up falling in the water two seconds after. » Bad snickered as Skeppy shot him a look.

« Actually, if I remember correctly, you were the one to miserably fall and turn your boat upside down. »

The kid could already picture the mini fight about to come, so he sat himself back comfortably.

« No, no, no. You were all like “Oh Bad, why don't we”- »

« This is ridiculous. »

« “-why don't we race towards that sand while standing!”»

« I did not say that- »

« Yes you did! »

« Wow, the lies. »

He broke the situation up with his sudden epiphany. « Gifts! » Sapnap yelled, having his parents turn to him immediately, as he fumbled for the leather sachet from earlier that day and handed it to Bad.

The latter blinked a few times and accepted the item in his hands, carefully undoing the tied up string around it: out of it fell a bracelet of black leather with three gems sitting together in the middle: redstone, quartz and diamond.

« Oh my gosh … »

« Happy Father's Day! » the kid sat up and leapt into Bad's arms to be pulled in a tight hug.

« You didn't have to do this, is that why you went out today? » he exchanged a quick glance with Skeppy who was simply admiring the soft scene. « Thank you so much, both of you, this is so sweet, I adore it. » he kept complimenting, as Sapnap released him to put the bracelet on Bad's arm himself.

He then turned towards the other, a grin creeping up on his face. « As for your gift … »

« Oh no, » Skeppy put his hands up defensively, before giggling. « Please, spare me. »

His son exchanged a look with Bad, both standing up to place a sort of vertical wooden pane on the side of the fire, and positioning themselves so the shadows of their hands could appear on the wood.

« Welcome to the ultimate shadow play! » the kid opened his arms theatrically. « Tonight, we will be telling the story of the Bravest Hero of the Nether! » Bad accompanied the explanation with various mouth sound effects.

Skeppy could hold it together, surely he didn't have his head in his hands already because of how adorable it all already looked.

The story had been a dramatic retelling of all the time they had spent in the nether on different occasions, with a specific focus on Skeppy, completely told out of Bad's shadow figures on wood, the occasional sound effects and Sapnap's incredible storytelling along with some firey visual effects here and there.

« And that is how, ultimately, he crossed paths with the Nether again, to collect quartz alongside his trusted warrior Sapnap. »

Bad dropped his arms. « You went to the nether without me?»

Okay, he had a point.

It was a little unnerving how the netherfolk didn't seem to like Skeppy that much, they would tolerate Sapnap despite his humanoid features, but rest assured with Bad around, they were always respected.

Which was a synonym of never attacked on sight.

Sapnap beat Skeppy in an apology. « I'm sorry, I ran towards the portal cause I really wanted to get the quartz myself, so dad went with me. We will tell you next time. »

The demon only sighed at the puppy eyes his son made at him. « Alright, I will accept that, but know that that expression doesn't work with me. » he then ruffled his hair, as the kid winked at his other dad, who mouthed him a grateful “thank you”.

Needless to say, the show was over and it didn't take long before Sapnap was sound asleep between his dads.

Switching from looking at the sea to the night sky, Skeppy let out a small breath. « Do you believe in fate, Bad? »

« Mh? Why the question? » he loved his soft spoken voice.

Careful not to wake his son up, he stroked Sapnap's hair.

« When we found him. The night before the sky was so clear you could see the planets. The fireplace had been flickering brighter than before the entire night and the day after you somehow knew you had to go to the nether. »

Bad seemed to consider, humming low. « Well, you see. The thing about coincidences is that humans set an objective number onto them, ignoring the fact that events are always subjective to the people that they happen to. One could see a myriad of facts linked together that actually have nothing to do with each other. »

« Or, have just a couple that do? »

He nodded. « You're following me. But where I want to go is: there's few beings, humans comprehended, that have the gift of speaking and a very specific type of intelligence that can bring us to question complicated things, such as your sense of self. So it is only logical to think that we're the ones to create these connections and notice them if we think too hard about them. »

« Isn't noticing connections the point? »

« Not if we are the ones to make them. We link events up ourselves. Thus, in a sense, I kind of believe fate to be artificial. »

Skeppy shrugged. « I mean, we did come up with the word … »

That pulled a chuckled out of Bad. « You're a muffinhead. But yea, I'm not saying believing in fate is dumb and you shouldn't do it. Wouldn't you believe in something you made for yourself, if it's good for you? So if you want to think Sapnap was destined to find his way to us in any circumstance, that's really nice. I like the thought. »

They both looked down at the kid, silence only broken by Skeppy's small snort when Sapnap snuggled closer, muttering an “I love you” in amidst his dreams.

« It is really nice. »

#skephaloweek2021 #skephalo #badboyhalo #skeppy #sapnap #fanfic #purp's writings #long post #im a little late today yeet

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bqstqnbruin · 5 years ago

Text

Two times you knew where you were going and one time you didn’t

So that Matthew fic turned into a Matthew Tkachuk one (thanks @hockeyfutbolkpopyeah !). It just didn’t fit with Gryz when I started writing it, but I have a Gryz reqeuest it’s just 3:30 in the morning and I’m teaching in less than 7 hours so I should probably be going to sleep if I want to teach them the correct stuff. This is longish though, I hope you like it!

_____________________________________

“We need to plan a vacation. I’m tired of being stuck inside with nothing to do.” You throw your book that you’ve been staring blankly at to the other side of the room, it sliding across the floor before hitting the wall. “You’ve been going on trips all year while I’ve been here, working, like a boring normal person.” Your boyfriend, Matthew, was in the kitchen, not even thirty feet away, making you dinner while you were ninety percent sure he either wasn’t listening to you, or couldn’t hear you. “Can we take a road trip? Like, go all cliche college girls with the snacks, the playlists, the Airbnbs around the country?”

“Well,” he puts down the knife from whatever he was chopping up, “Where do you want to go?”

“I don’t know” you shrug, walking to the kitchen. He turns to you, putting his hand on his hip, one eyebrow raised, giving you a look that says, ‘really?’ “You look ridiculous with your hand on your hip.” You can’t help but laugh as you try to move his hand off.

He snaps it away, a smile growing on his face as a laugh leaves his lips. “What do you mean you don’t know? You’re the one who brought it up.”

“Oooh!” you say, draping your arms around on his shoulders while he pulls you in by the waist, “I saw this thing on Pinterest where -”

“No, not Pinterest.” Matthew groans.

“Yes, Pinterest, shut up,” you snap. You were female who loved aesthetic, how could you not be on Pinterest all the time? “But I saw this couple was trying to decide on their next vacation destination, kind of like you and me, and they got this map and threw a dart at it, and they just went where the dart landed.”

He stares at you for a moment, brow scrunched as he’s thinking. Either that or he’s questioning what other crazy ideas you can think of and why he’s with you in the first place. He’s said stuff like that before, sarcastically, of course, so you wouldn’t be shocked if this was one of those moments. “That might not be the worst idea. Then we don’t have to deal with your constant, ‘I don’t know’ stuff.”

“So, let’s get a map?”

The map and darts came in two days later to your apartment. As you hung up the map on the wall, Matthew started, “Aren’t we going to put wholes in the wall if we throw darts at it?”

“Yeah, and? You paid the security deposit, not me,” you joke.

“Oh, shut up.”

You stand back, dart in hand, “Who’s throwing, you or me?”

“You can’t aim for shit.”

“Ok, Mr. Ten-Goal-Season.”

“The season just started! Ten goals is good!” he defends himself, his cheeks turning red.

“Can I throw it?” you beg, giving him the puppy dogs eyes that get him to say yes to you always.

“We’re gonna end up in the fucking ocean,” he mutters as both of you stand back for you to throw the dart.

“If it lands in the ocean then you better learn how to swim because this is the determining dart,” you say as-a-matter-of-factly, winding up to throw. You chuck it, just praying that it sticks so Matthew will shut up about your inability to throw things.

“And we’re staying on land!” he yells, running to the map.

“Where are we going?”

“We’re going to New Orleans!”

One

The entire drive was spent with you and Matthew switching off driving every six-ish hours, six shifts total, three shifts each, playfully criticizing each other’s driving at least four times per shift. The only time you stopped was for food, the bathroom, or to switch drivers. The two of you sang off-key to every song for hours on end.

“Babe, where are we even staying?” he asks you. You had programmed the address into your phone for the Airbnb, but you guess you forget to show Matthew where it was.

“We’re staying in the French Quarter: we get the entire villa, there’s Wifi, parking, a kitchen, only one bed.” He gives you a quick glance as you do that annoying flirty eyebrow wiggle that makes him laugh every time.

“Ooo, you should have told me about the one-bed thing before. That seems like a real deal-breaker for this trip. I think we have to turn around and go home.”

“Oh, shush, you know you love me,” you tease.

“Well, duh. You think I would put up with your crap if I didn’t?” That stupid smile that makes you melt shows up on his face. “I think we’re here?”

“We are!” You leap out of the car, leaving Matthew to get the bags while you follow the directions the host left you to get the key. You burst through the door, Matthew following suit, “J’adore!”

“You know that just means ‘I love,’ right?”

You turn to him, shocked, “You know French?”

“Vous seriez surpris de ce que je sais.” He winks, pushing past you to go explore the rest of the villa.

“What did you say?” you yell to him, trying to find where he went.

“You’d be surprised what I know.”

You follow his voice and find him in the bedroom. “And what do you know?” you ask him, leaning against the doorway.

“Well, I know that we both want to go explore New Orleans, but we’re both too tired right now.”

“Well, yeah.”

“But,” he starts again, “I also know that there is at least one activity we aren’t too tired for.” He walks up to you, putting his hands on your waist, leaning down to press his forehead against yours.

His lips ghost yours, you doing everything you can to let the teasing last a little longer, “What’s that?” He knows how much you love this.

“This,” he lets out, lifting you up and kissing you, you wrapping your legs around his waist as he stumbles to the bed. He throws you down, climbing over you, starting to tug at your shirt as he leaves a trail of kisses from your jaw down to your collar bone.

The two of you spend the rest of the night in bed, going to sleep more exhausted than you were when you got there.

The next morning, Matthew wakes you up by starting to jump on the bed. “It’s early, we need coffee, and we need to start exploring!” he yells like a toddler, jumping off the bed, landing so hard on the ground you were sure he broke something.

“You’re fucking annoying.”

“Yes, but I’ll be less annoying once we go to Cafe du Monde, which I know your mother loves, and you two have the same taste, so I’m like ninety percent sure that you will love it, too. Plus you said you wanted to go there, so might as well do it first so we can get caffeine and energy!” he practically yells from the bathroom.

“You don’t need any more energy!” you yell back. He could go from being a child to being how he was last night in 0.2 seconds. You really did love this boy, despite the pest that he always was.

You get up out of bed and try to get ready with Matthew practically on top of you, forcing you to get ready fast while he hands you dry cereal to eat so you’re not as cranky when you have to interact with more people. You put on olive green floral shorts, a plain white top, and some sandals, and try to find your bag in the mess that Matthew made of your stuff trying to unpack at some point last night.

“Are we driving or walking?” he asks, turning around to face you as you meet him by the door, “Fuck,” he whispers, “If I didn’t want to explore the city so bad, I’d want to explore you right now.”

You throw your head back, letting out a cackle that would cause any other guy to break up with you. “That was disgusting,” you say, taking his hand, “and let’s walk. Decatur Street is like ten minutes away, and it’s gorgeous out.”

“Not as gorgeous as you, though,” he flirts, trying to keep his corniness going.

“Shut up,” you say, not hiding the smile on your face.

The two of you leave, ready to explore New Orleans in the summer heat, walking in the morning to the world-famous cafe. Your parents had gone to New Orleans a year before you were born, and your mom bought a Cafe du Mondo mug that she still uses all these years later, faded, chipped, and probably going to fall apart if she even looks at it the wrong way.

“We have to get her a new mug. The next time she sees us, we will definitely be bumped up on the ‘favorite children list.’” You start rambling and walking just a little faster, doing a little skip on the sidewalk as he tries to keep up with your pulling him towards the cafe.

“Am I one of her children?” he asks.

“She probably loves you more than I do, God only knows why,” you tell him, rolling your eyes, him knowing that it’s probably true.

“Well, I am pretty great,” he says, kissing your cheek as you approach the cafe.

“Wow.” You admire the already busy cafe, the people sitting outside under the green and white awning, laughing, smiling, reading, eating, drinking. “Can I be annoying?”

“You need permission?”

“Can I get a picture of you in front of the cafe? Please?” you beg him, taking out your phone. “You know how much my mom would flip if she knew we came to her favorite place in the world?”

“Why don’t we get someone to take a picture of the two of us? Excuse me?” he stops a stranger walking by, “Would you mind taking some pictures of me and my beautiful girlfriend? It’s for her mother.”

He hands the person his phone, pulling you towards him. He stands behind you, his arms wrapped around you, kissing your cheek as you can’t help but blush and smile by how loving he was being. The stranger hands back his phone, you two thanking them profusely as you go to get into the long line and figure out what you want for your breakfast.

“So do we want to be cliche and get what they’re famous for, or do you want to get something else?” you ask him. “The beignets are to die for and my mother has never shut up about how she’ll never have anything as good as them, so we kind of have to get those. And then the cafe au lait is supposed to be great and I think you would love that, but I need black coffee, so I might just steal a sip of yours?” you spit out at him as you get closer to the front of the line.

“I have no clue what you just said. You’re ordering for us and I’m trusting you this time.”

“Ooo, that’s dangerous, isn’t it?” you tease him, getting up to the front of the line. You order the beignets and coffees, stepping off to the side since all the tables were full. If you had to walk and eat, you didn’t really care. You got to be with Matthew, your probably crappy aim bringing you into what was quickly becoming one of your favorite places on this planet, even though it had only been about an hour.

You get your beignets, taking a bite as you walk around and explore more of the area. “Holy, fuck,” you say, mouth full, “this is amazing. I want to marry this beignet.”

“That’s going to be pretty hard if you eat it.”

“I want to marry the person who made this beignet.”

“As your boyfriend, should I be offended by this?”

“You have competition. Become a beignet boy and I’ll reconsider.”

He throws his head back, laughing. “Where to next?”

Two

You spent the rest of the day exploring the French Quarter, roaming aimlessly, getting strangers to take pictures of you everywhere you went. Every photo you took was your new favorite.

“Let’s go to the French Market tomorrow,” you tell Matthew, settling into bed. You two were exhausted; way too exhausted to do anything else. The two of you had walked like twenty miles during the day. You actually probably didn’t but it felt like it. The sun had drained you, giving Matthew a little pink on his cheeks, you knowing to reapply sunscreen enough times that you were fine.

“Sure,” Matthew mumbles, falling asleep.

-----

“Three centuries of history, six blocks of shopping?” you exclaim as you get to the French Market. You had been googling the history of the market the entire Uber ride over, talking Matthew’s ear off about it, him pretending to listen because he really doesn’t care as much about history as you do. You were excited for another day of walking. If you weren’t here, you would probably be just sitting on the couch, reading, watching Netflix, and complaining to Matthew about how you were bored.

“So, do we want to do food or shopping first?”

“Shopping we need to work up an appetite,” you tell him, dragging him into the market. You wanted to walk all the way through first, pass each place, then go into the stores on the way back to the entrance when it was time to leave. You pointed out so many places that you wanted to go into; Evan’s Creole Candy Factory, Head to Toe, Pop Shop, Cella’s Boutique, Matthew only really caring about the first one, but he came with you because he knew you wanted him to.

“Sports!” he yells, trying to drag you to the only sports-themed shop in the market: N’Awlin’s Sports. He starts running towards the store, faster than a kid running to a candy store, both of you almost dropping the bags of stuff you had purchased in the meantime.

As soon as the two of you enter the store, he stops, takes in a breath, and says, “I love you, but if you can marry beignet’s, I’m marrying sports.”

“You’re already married to sports, babe,” you say, smiling because of how happy he was. You knew that you were dragging him around. But every time you looked at him with a smile, one grew on his face, too. He loved seeing you happy, and you loved seeing him happy.

“I don’t see any hockey stuff.”

“There’s no hockey in Louisiana. The closest team is probably Dallas?” you guess.

“That’s dumb.” He just stands there, looking a little defeated because his beloved sport wasn’t represented in the store.

“Let’s go outside, I’m sure we can find something you like to look at,” you say, pulling him out of the store.

“I like to look at you.”

“Gross,” you laugh, “Let’s have someone take our picture like we did yesterday!”

Doing the same thing as he did outside Cafe du Monde, Matthew convinced a stranger to take your picture. This time, he insisted on hugging you, kissing your cheek while you looked into the camera, beaming. You both loved the photos from yesterday, especially the cute lovey ones, so why not take some more?

Plus one

“I’m stuffed,” you say, trying to stretch out as much as you can in the chair of the restaurant without risking hitting another patron or a waiter.

“You picked a good place,” Matthew admits, raising his glass to you to finish the last bit of his drink. This was the only place you had been today; after the last two days of running around and exploring, you two had just decided to take a lazy day. When you realized it was dinner time and the only food you had was snack food, you knew you had to go out for dinner.

“I’m marrying the chef,” you say.

“No, I am,” he spits back.

“Guess we both are.” You shrug, finishing the last bit of your drink as the waiter comes back with Matthew’s debit card.

“Ready to go?” He stands up, reaching out for your hand to lead you out of the restaurant.

“Sure, where?”

“Oh, you’ll see.”

“You don’t know this city well enough for me to trust you when you say that.”

“Will ya just shush and trust me?” A smile sneaks onto his lips as he leads you down the road.

“Where are we?”

“The Moonwalk.” The two of you start walking down a long path, overlooking the Mississippi. It was gorgeous, buzzing with people, lit up by the street lights and the shine of the nearly full moon overhead. There was something magical about it, you had never seen anything like it.

“And to think, we came here because of a dart.” You approach some musicians playing a song you swore you knew, couples dancing to the slow beat. Matthew took you by the waist, you draping your arms around his neck as you followed the rest of the couples.

“Never thought I would say thank god for a dart,” he says in a low voice. “I love you.”

The music stops, and so does the dancing. Everyone around you claps as they start to play a faster song.

“Let’s get our picture in front of the river,” he suggests, motioning for you to give him your phone.

He flags a couple down, handing them your phone, taking a minute as it looks like he handed something else to them before coming back.

“Everything ok?” you ask.

“Couldn’t be better,” he says, beaming, putting his arm around you.

The two of you smile as they take your pictures on what you’re pretty sure is also Matthew’s phone. You start to head towards them to get your phones back when Matthew pulls you back.

“Wait, wait, not yet.”

“What’s up?”

Before you know it, he was getting down on one knee.

“No way,” you say has he takes your hand in his, a small box in the other.

“I had a plan to ask you this before you suggested the road trip, and honestly, it was me throwing the ring at you because that kind of fits our personalities. But this I think is much better. I want to be the beignet boy, I want to be your mom’s favorite child, I want to be yours and I want you to be mine. Y/N, will you marry me?”

You’re a mess, crying and thanking yourself for wearing waterproof makeup today. Even if he had proposed to you with his original idea, you would have said the same thing. “Yes. Yes of course!”

He slides the ring on your finger, everyone around you cheering and clapping, the musicians playing a new song. He kisses you, lifting you up at your waist, your leg popping like Mia in the Princess Diaries.

All of this because of a dart.

#matthew tkachuk #matthew tkachuk imagines #matthew tkachuk fic #nhl #nhl imagine #nhl fic #hockey #hockey imagines #hockey fic #calgary flames #calgary flames imagines #calgary flames fic #flames #flames imagines #flames fic

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jaskierswolf · 4 years ago

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The Viscount and The Witcher pt.1/4

(Note: Reposted from my old blog. The rest can be found on my Ao3 or on my pinned masterlist)

Viscount Julian Alfred Pankratz de Lettenhove was bored. He’d been bored for some time now. In his youth he’d dreamed of becoming a travelling bard. He’d even focused his time in Oxenfurt on the liberal arts and had graduated quite successfully from the academy, but before he’d even begun his journey to becoming renowned troubadour, he’d been called back to his family home. The news of his father’s death had been an unfortunate one and he’d been forced to step up and become head of his vast estate.

There had been a moment, in the dead of night, witching hour, when he’d very nearly picked up his lute and fled.

He hadn’t.

He’d turned over and gone back to sleep. He did have a rather luxurious bed and he’d not been short of company to fill it with. He often wondered what would have become of him if he had run away that night, at barely eighteen. He often dreamed of the songs he could have written, the people he could have met, the adventures he could have had.

A deep part of him sorely regretted the path not taken.

Instead he drowned his sorrows in the most delicious wine from Toussaint and lured beautiful people to his bedchamber. He was determined to enjoy the few pleasures left to him in gluttonous amounts.

He gazed out of the window of his study into the gardens. They were stunning at this time of year. They weren’t the most well kept gardens, but he liked that. He enjoyed the wild long grass and the litany of yellow, white and purple weeds that sprung up in the summer. The sounds of bees filled the air, a constant low buzzing that he found both soothing and wildly distracting. He enjoyed a long stroll in the gardens when he wasn’t buried under paperwork. Quite frankly he didn’t give a rat’s ass about the different silk sheets used in the guest bedrooms or whether the local houses were paying their taxes in time. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if all of that diplomatic nonsense just disappeared?

Poverty could become a thing of the past. He’d given away vast amounts of his fortune whenever he could convince his lawyers to let the assets go but his estate only thrived more as the farmers, workers and merchants were able to work more efficiently and invested more funding into their livelihoods.

He couldn’t begrudge them that but he felt guilty for owning so much when they lived on so little so he kept feeding his money back into the surrounding villages and they kept growing and expanding their homes and businesses.

None of the surrounding lords or barons could understand how he did it.

He couldn’t exactly explain it himself.

He had been hoping to run his estate into the ground so he could run off and have the heroic adventures that he’d always dreamed of. Perhaps he would even run into one of those witchers. He was fascinated by witchers. He always had been, ever since he was a boy and he’d heard the rumours of the Butcher of Blaviken, Geralt of Rivia. The rumours were that the man had slaughtered an entire village with his bare hands in some kind of blood-fuelled frenzy.

Julian didn’t believe that for a second.

He’d snuck down to the library and buried himself under books, scrolls and parchments, anything in his father’s great library with even the whiff of a witcher. He’d read bestiaries and fairytales, utterly bewitched by the tales of fae, vampires and werewolves. He devoured everything he could by candlelight. It was what had driven him to his chosen career as a bard. He wanted to experience those stories himself, he needed to live it. His thirst for knowledge and innate curiosity had seen him through Oxenfurt with ease. He’d been able to spend far too long in taverns and brothels whilst his peers studied books and manuscripts that he’d read within the first months of attending the famous school. The library had been enviable and he’d been unable to stay away for months.

He sighed dramatically. It had all been a fucking waste of time. He closed the leather-bound book he’d been scrawling in, even after all these years he couldn’t help the flashes of creative inspiration that hit him. It was like a vampire’s thirst, burning in his throat and heart. He had to write, he had to play and sing and dance. He ran his fingers along the underside of his writing desk until he heard a faint click and a drawer popped open. He tucked the book neatly into the draw beneath the pressed dandelion.

Dandelion.

It was to be his stage name had he followed through with his plans.

He’d kept the pressed yellow flower as a reminder. He picked it up and twirled it between his fingers before sighing loudly.

“Master Dandelion, renowned troubadour and poet.” He pouted before gently returning the flower to its cage and closing the drawer shut, it vanished into the wooden desk without a trace. “I supposed it is quite poetic,” He whined. “I am like the flower trapped in my own cage from which I cannot escape. The flower which holds my name and soul shares my fate.”

He groaned and bumped his head against the desk. The long feather in his hat flopped down, tickling his nose. He promptly sneezed.

“Ah. To the gods! Even my own hat hates me.” He moaned.

Thankfully he was pulled from his self-pity by a knock at the door. He jumped to his feet and straightened his hat, tucking the treacherous heron feather back into place.

“Come in!” He trilled.

Annabelle, a pretty redhead and one of his longest serving maids entered the room. “ Lord Lettenhove.” Annabelle curtsied.

Julian rolled his eyes and pulled the girl to her feet. “Annabelle, dearest, how many times must I ask you to call me Julian and none of this grovelling nonsense. Tell me, how are your family? Your mother was sick, is she feeling any better? I trust she received the medicine I sent.”

Annabelle blushed and smiled up at him. “Yes Lord Let - Lord Julian. Thank you very much. You are too kind to us.”

“My darling, I simply have nothing better to do with my fortune than ensure my staff are well looked after. How’s the little one, Eleanor if I remember correctly?”

“Yes, Lord Julian. She’s growing up fast. My sister told me she started to crawl yesterday.” Annabelle answered meekly.

Julian gasped and put his hand to his chest. “And you missed it! Oh my dear, my sincerest apologies.”

Annabelle shook her head. “I love my job, Lord Julian. There is no reason to apologise. You’ve already done far too much for my family.”

It was Julian’s time to blush. He hated how much his staff revered him, didn’t they realise his motivations were purely selfish? He just wanted to get out of this house! He wanted to leave them. They just didn’t see any of that but he didn’t let his frustration show. “Now now, they’ll be time to sing my praises later, my dear, what was it that you needed? We are not due another order from the farms yet are we?”

The girl laughed quietly. “No, nothing like that. Forgive me, Lord Julian, I don’t mean to make assumptions.”

She shuffled awkwardly on her feet. “Well go on! Don’t keep me in suspense like this.” He pouted with a hand on his hips.

“There’s a rumour going round, Lord Julian.” She blushed. “About a witcher in one of the outer villages. They were having problems on the full moon. Mysterious and gruesome murders.”

Julian wanted to jump for joy.

A real witcher.

On his land.

“Oh my!” He clapped his hands together. “We must send for him at once!” He ran to his desk and pulled out a sheet of parchment. “Now tell me Annabelle what monsters are more enticing to a monster hunter, vampires or werewolves?” He scoffed before she could answer. “No no, that’s too obvious, and unbearably dull. Nekkers? Oooh, what about a draconid? A forktail perhaps?”

Annabelle kept opening and closing her mouth but there was no interrupting Julian when he got like this. He barely even noticed he still had company.

“Or a wraith!” He laughed gaily. “Oh yes that will do nicely! A wraith haunting the attic! Then we may get to see the witcher in action, oh the tales I could write! Maybe I could publish them under a pseudonym, Master Dandelion may yet still live!”

His hands flew over the paper as he scrawled as quickly and elegantly as he could. Once he was finished he read it over quickly, cornflower blue eyes scanning over the words quick as lightning.

My dear witcher,

On behalf of Viscount Julian Alfred Pankratz de Lettenhove, I would like to thank you for offering your services to assist our villagers with their furry little problem. I write this letter before the news of your success has reached me but I have no doubt that you will succeed in your quest! You must tell me whether you have slain the beast or cured it of the lycanthropy. I await the tale of your heroic adventure with great anticipation.

The Lord Lettenhove requests your presence at his estate. You see, my dearest witcher, we have a little pest problem of our own. A wraith haunts the house and our poor chambermaids are quite at their wits end with fright.

I beseech you. Don’t delay.

Yours, Dandelion.

He chuckled at the name. He was going to have a lot of fun with this witcher, whoever it maybe, and he didn’t need the witcher knowing exactly who he was just yet. He sealed the letter swiftly and all but shoved poor Annabelle from the room so that she could deliver it hastily.

He followed after her and practically ran down the corridor and up the stairs to the master bedroom. He flung open his wardrobe as he hummed a new melody under his breath. He needed to choose an outfit. Something that was less Viscount and more genius bard.

He stripped off his golden doublet and trousers in exchange for his favourite plum set. It had intricate embroidery around the collar that he just adored. He paired the doublet with a white undershirt with lace around the cuffs and collar.

He took off his hat and twirled a strand of his soft golden blond hair in between his fingers. He’d been growing it out lately, he was really just so bored, and he’d been considering experimenting with some curling irons like he’d seen his cook use. He was certain that Hanna would show him how to use them if he asked nicely.

But did he have enough time for that?

He still needed to set up his wraith problem, and it needed to be convincing enough to keep the witcher around long enough to get to know him, perhaps he could even lure the man to his bedroom if he were that way inclined.

Gods he hoped he was.

It had been too long since Julian, no, Dandelion, had had a male lover.

Well, if he was planning to seduce the man then he really should look his best but first he needed to make sure that they stage was set. He picked up his old forgotten lute from the corner of the bedroom, gently trailing a finger down the neck of the instrument before quickly plucking at the strings and fiddling with the pegs to make sure she was still in tune.

“I am so sorry darling.” He cooed to the instrument. “It’s been too long.”

He tucked her into his old lute case and appraised his reflection in his mirror.

“Hmm…” He stuck his tongue out as he concentrated. “Not quite right. Oh yes! My hat!” He swiped up a matching plum coloured bonnet and pinned a feather in place because plopping it onto his head. He looked back at his reflection with a furrowed brow and then inspiration hit him and he tilted his hat so he fell slightly to one side. “Perfect!”

He giggled and bowed dramatically to his reflection. “Master Dandelion, at your service!” He grinned seductively.

Oh this witcher would have no idea what hit him.

#the witcher #geraskier #gerlion #geraskier fanfiction #geralt of rivia #jaskier pankratz #julian alfred pankratz #viscount de lettenhove #geralt x dandelion #dandelion #wolfie's witcher writing #the viscount and the witcher

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kittysuicoffee · 3 years ago

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Evil rewrite

Lila Rossi was a liar and a good one at that she just have tell what people wanted to hear and boom she have them under her complete control she was unstoppable until she met her… the pain in her rear end Marinette Dupain-cheng was the girl that could ruin everything for her she was a goddess in that school, but Marinette thinks she can take down a god. She will make her regret the day she stood up to her! But Lila didn’t want to put in more work than she have to do she tried to get Marinette expelled it almost worked. But no thanks to Adrien she had to make a lie to keep the girl in school she would have to make Adrien pay for that one day but not today.

Lila was in her room she had a journal in her hands she was writing down ideas to get rid of the pest. She marked out ideas when her mother called her. She rolled her eyes not wanting to deal what her mother wanted but got up anyway to see what she needed “yes mamma?” Lila said looking at her mother her mother looked worried about something “Lila do you remember your cousin?” Lila eyes went wide she nodded her head quickly Lila’s mother sighed taking a deep breath “we-well your aunt called me telling me that they are moving here to Paris to be closer to us.” “Really!?” Lila said excitedly Lila’s mother nodded her head Lila jumped in joy her cousin was coming! “Now Lila.” Lila’s mother said stopping Lila in her excitement “I know how much you miss them but remember they are not good people so be very careful around them especially around him.” Lila nodded her head in understanding Lila’s mother smiled “okay than I’ll call you when dinner is ready.” Lila smiled at her mother “okay mamma.” Lila walked back into her room she went over back to her journal she wrote something down and smiled. She may know how to get Marinette off of her back after all…

“I am so late!” Marinette exclaimed running out of her house she had over slept again this was the third time this week! She couldn’t understand why shadow moth couldn’t not send out an akuma late at night this was the third time! she made it to class when Mme. Bustier called her name “here!” Marinette said going to her seat that was right next to Ayla “Marinette girl you need to find a way to stop shadow moth soon so you could get some real sleep!” Ayla said in a whisper Marinette sighed “I know…” she whisper back Mme. Bustier clapped her hands together to get the class attention she smiled “okay class we have a new student!” the students of Mme. Bustier class whisper wondering who the new student is she clapped her hands again the class fell silent with that she turned to the door “you can come in now.” A boy with caramel brown hair walked into class his dull blue-green eyes scanned across the class room when he face the front of the class, he smiled it was a kind smile. “Tell us who you are.” Mme. Bustier asked the boy cleared his throat “my name is Alessandro Rossi. It nice to meet you all.” His voice was angelic.

Marinette blinked at the last name… Rossi? Mme. Bustier voice her confusion “Rossi? Are you related to Lila by any chance?” Alessandro turn to face Mme. Bustier with a nodded “yes. She’s, my cousin.”

Marinette mouth dropped.

Marinette watch Alessandro carefully not wanted to miss anything about the boy the whole class was surrounded the boy with questions Mme. Bustier clapped her hands together the class went silent “now class that was rude of you to do!” she turned to Alessandro “I am sorry about that Alessandro please take a seat next to your cousin. She’s in the very back.” Alessandro furrowed his brow in confusion “why is she in the very back?” “Oh, umm well the class we had change the seat so Lila could seat up front but there were some complaints on the seating…” Mme. Bustier said eyeing Marinette who blinked “so we have to go back to the old seating arrangements.” Alessandro shook his head “my cousin has a hearing problem you can’t just change the seats because of a student decided they wanted their seat back. That’s not right!” “I know that why I am changing seats again so Lila can be up front today I was planning on changing the seats after class went to lunch anyway!” Alessandro smiled “thank you Mme. Bustier.”

Marinette couldn’t believe her ears why would Mme. Bustier do this! Marinette was not going to let this stand she was about to voice her complaints when Mme. Bustier turned to her “Marinette! Why don’t you take Alessandro and show him around the school?” Marinette blinked in surprise she wasn’t quick enough to say no “great now take him and show him around!” “b-but-!” “Now Marinette.” Marinette looked down defeated she walked down the stairs to Alessandro she held out her hand her eyes showing skepticism “name is Marinette Dupain-cheng it nice to meet you.” “Alessandro Rossi it nice to meet you too.” He took her hand into his own.

When they came back Marinette and Alessandro was met with new seating arrangements Marinette turned to Mme. Bustier “your seat is in the back Marinette.” Marinette nodded walking to her new seat and Alessandro walked to his that was right next to Lila. “I can’t believe this!” Marinette exclaimed walking out of the school Ayla followed right behind her “well what did you expect her to do?” Marinette turned to Ayla “to say no! Lila doesn’t have a hearing problem!” Ayla rolled her eyes “we don’t know that.” Marinette wanted to scream at the sky why would Mme. Bustier do this? “Marinette?” Marinette turned to face Alessandro “can I talk to you alone?” n-!” Ayla cut Marinette off “of course you can!” Ayla push Marinette into Alessandro “I’ll wait for you girl.” Marinette looked at Ayla in shocked “go ahead girl.” Marinette sighed and followed Alessandro back into the school they went into the locker-room which was empty Alessandro turned to her “I can sense that you have a problem with me and my cousin?” “You damn right I do!” Marinette exclaimed pointing her finger into Alessandro chest “Lila is a liar! You fall for her lies and talked my teacher into changing seats!” Alessandro gasped “Marinette my cousin is no liar! She really does have a hearing problem!” Marinette cross her arms “prove it!” Alessandro sighed crossing his arms “Marinette you can believe her or not I just what’s best for my cousin.” “She can only have the best when she stop lying!” Alessandro sighed again “Marinette Lila told me about you.” Marinette eyes went wide “whatever she said to you is a lie!” Marinette said quickly Alessandro raise a brow “so she said that you’re a nice girl who is willing to help out your fellow classmate was a lie than?” “Yes! Wait no! huh?” Marinette was caught off guard by what he said Lila complimented her. Alessandro looked confused “so what was that a lie or…” “no she didn’t lie about that…” he smiled “okay than good to know!” he place a hand on Marinette shoulder “than I need you to prove that is true than…” he squeezed it hard Marinette wince at that looking into Alessandro dull blue-green eyes something was wrong. Something was very wrong “because if what she said wasn’t true about you… you well regret the day you met me…” the atmosphere of the room went cold fear was radiating off of Marinette which filled Alessandro up with glee “well Marinette I hope you and I become the bestest of friend throughout the school year!” he let go of Marinette and left the locker-room. After a while just standing there Marinette let out a breath that she didn’t know she was holding her hand went to her chest she hadn’t felt this much fear since chat Blanc she jumped when the locker room door opened, she turned to face Ayla who looked at her confused “you okay girl?” Marinette nodded her head “yeah lets go…” Marinette quickly left the locker room going outside of the school she saw that Lila was getting into a pretty expensive car with Alessandro who looked back at her their eyes met for a moment he smiled and winked at her before getting into the car and driving away.

rewrote the story because I didn't like the first.

#miraculous ladybug #ml story #ml fic idea #ml marinette #ml lila #ml adrien #ml alya

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silveryfairy · 4 years ago

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hey man if it's not too much trouble, could you give us a brief rundown of the Nocturnes? It's just, every morning I wake up and there's a new one, and I Care everyone in this establishment a lot though I don't really know them, thank you kindly have a nice day

let my preface this by saying: aayushi, i love you, and your enthusiasm and interest for the things i create never ceases to bring me joy. you are the kind of friend i think everyone should have and i say that completely genuinely outside of this bit.

i say that as an apology in advance for what i’m about to unleash upon you, because what you’re going to see is the product of my friend @himepapillon and i’s absolute BRAINROT and what comes of it when not only two people make an oc universe from scratch but what happens when we then have to explain that universe to other people

you are in no way required to retain this information as to be completely honest me and jeremie haven’t fully either and we’re the ones who MADE this shitshow. below is the shoddy family tree i lovingly crafted in ms paint

let us begin.

for starters, i’ll specify some things:

1. not every oc on this chart is mine, as it’s a collaboration between me and jeremie - the koenig family and bishop family belong to faer but the rest is all me baby! for the sake of your soul i will only be going into my half of this Mess

2. the universe this takes place in is a pretty wacky and silly one, just, like, Slightly removed from reality. these characters are all completely batshit insane and do things that no human being probably should. it’s all portrayed critically, as the general concept of this whole thing is “the goings-on of a bunch of unhinged corrupt rich people”. we kind of flip flop on how seriously stuff is played but if i had to slap a genre on this it’d be, like, black comedy drama. i know a lot of these concepts sound kinda fucked to write but that’s just because i’m trying to describe them in a SOMEWHAT concise way without going into Super Introspective mode

the nocturnes are an incredibly influential and rich family in the uk that tends to produce very influential and rich people. they’re also all a little bit insane. the main characters of this Saga are the sons of desmond and xanthes, the family’s resident Power Couple and biggest figureheads. they suck ass but that will become apparent the second i talk about their children.

from oldest to youngest, the nocturne boys are:

ichor nocturne, 25 - the eldest, ichor was disowned from the household when he was 18 for unruly behavior, sent to live alone on a farm so he couldn’t tarnish his family’s image any further. since then, you’d think the isolation has driven him a bit mad - he’s a very prolific cotton farmer and has been doing astonishingly well for himself, running his farm on his own with only his parents’ inheritance as help. ...that, and, of course, the blood of the people he executes to keep his crops growing - or so he believes. he moonlights as an executioner in the small town over, exterminating the ‘pests’ of the city. despite his newfound violence, he still routinely checks in on his siblings, finding ways to mysteriously end up at their door to pay visits. the older brother instinct still hasn’t left

icarus nocturne, 23 - the second eldest (only by technicality, as he is a twin), icarus is the family’s golden child! but not in terms of business or anything, oh no - icarus is a famous heartthrob teen (sorta) musician! he’s been in the limelight since he was a little boy, being an actor as a small child and getting into music as he grew. his general Look(tm), accompanied by infectiously happy rave music, is a trademark cutesy mask over his face with oversized clothing - meant to express as much energy as possible as he bounces about the stage. in reality, he lives a life as forced and controlled as possible by virtue of... living the fucked up life of a child star. but his parents have someone to take the fall - so, what of his twin?

achilles nocturne, 23 - icarus’ younger twin, which wouldn’t mean much... in any family but this one. achilles has had it drilled into his head since the beginning that he was a mistake next to icarus, to the point where legally, he does not exist. following icarus beginning his career, achilles was unpersoned completely - living in the family’s basement with the height of his education being for a very specific purpose... needing to be icarus’ body double on tours and for paparazzi - after all, they can’t have icarus’ purity tainted by all those clamboring fans! it’s a godawful situation. on the bright side, though, achilles has found a hobby where he can be himself: twitch streaming! yes really. under the name of 1upanonymous, hidden under a mask just like his brother, achilles at least has a fanbase that can love him for who he is! ...uh, kind of.

tomasine “tommy” nocturne, 16 - the youngest of the bunch, and it says a lot about his siblings’ capabilities that he’s the technical heir to the nocturnes’ various businesses and fortune. tommy is just a feral 16 year old that doesn’t give two shits about any fame or fortune, he just wants to party and drink and have fun like any other kid his age! he’s rebellious, loud, and charmingly annoying (to his brothers anyway), and has no real care for the gravity of his family’s situations beyond finding it annoying that they want him to be all PRIM and PROPER and BUSINESSY EEWWWWW. he’s just a funny loud little child trying to live his best life. loves his brothers fiercely

already a mess of people. and really, all you need to know about or really keep in mind are those four: the upcoming characters are largely just side ones we came up with because we thought it’d be funny to flesh out this fucked up family more. so let’s get into the anatra branch of the family - headed by jael nocturne, xanthes’ brother and the siblings’ uncle

jael anatra-nocturne, who i am not giving an age for my own sanity trying to decipher this fucking timeline - a crude and playful uncle, jael is someone the nocturne boys either love (icarus, tommy) or hate (achilles, ichor). constantly joking, as he expresses affection with loving insults - kind of a money-driven asshole, but a lovable one - he’s a career politician and met his current husband, joaquin, on the job. or, well... no longer current, because jael’s funny life of debauchery, toxic masculinity, and making fun of his nephews, came to an abrupt end when he was assassinated on live television. yipes!

joaquin anatra-nocturne, who also does not get an age - jael’s former secretary and current widow, joaquin is the local wine uncle. im not sure if that’s a classification but it is now, because he is one. an unapologetic gold-digger, he (publicly) took jael’s death frighteningly well, and is now living his best life with a revolving door of new boyfriends. his relationship with jael was a genuine and very loving one, and joaquin IS devastated by his death, but both of them just found the bit of pretending to be this loveless gold digger/politician couple very funny, and being as suspicious as possible around his husband’s death is exactly what jael would have wanted joaquin to do

taddeo anatra-nocturne, 14 - the youngest child of these two, a shy little boy with big Child In A Horror Movie energies. makes potions in the backyard and probably decorates his clothes with animal bones n stuff when he’s older. despite this he’s pretty harmless, nice and fiercely loyal - tommy especially thinks he’s fun and likes to hang out with him at family gatherings - just so long as you look past the creepy dolls he likes to talk to and fires he likes to set. especially close with jael and wants to be a miniature version of him, buuut still being a shy tween taddeo hasn’t been able to act on that much.

dailon anatra-nocturne, 20 - the adopted second child of jael and joaquin, dailon is a moody and unstable delinquent that was snatched up by them just as he was about to age out of foster care. while he has a chill ‘cool-older-even-though-he’s-younger-cousin’ demeanor, the tension when he’s around his parents - jael specifically - can be cut with a knife. dailon hates his dad: ‘someone who expresses affection with insults and jokes and likes seeing people pissed at him’ and ‘someone who’s volatile, short-tempered, and sullen after living in a foster home most his life’ are just as bad of a combination as you’d expect. dailon gets himself into a lot of trouble, and is an overall very self-centered prick, but we’ll get more on that in a bit.

HELL FAMILY...2!!! that’s the last of the families to cover, buuuut there are still some other names on that list - mostly connected to dailon. this is REAL “just going on in the background” shit that you also do not need to know whatsoever (except for mitzi she’s pretty important she’s just down here for organization purposes) - i just like to play god and make characters get into drama.

[tw: cheating, unhealthy relationships, stalking]

mitzi “moon” altberg, 23 - achilles must feel very far away by now, but we’re back to him for a second! mitzi is his ex-girlfriend he met online, a fan-to-employee-to-lover and one of the maybe two people outside of the family achilles has shown his real face to. however, achilles growing up deeply unstable - between his parents’ abuse, having spotlights on him and adoring fans both as icarus’ body double and as a streamer, and in general not really growing up to be any kind of well developed human being - made this relationship a complete disaster. he grew obsessive and controlling - and when she tried to ignore him, he broke his one rule (to never go outside without permission) to find the hotel she was staying at in real life and show up to confront her. the incident was completely covered up, both by the nocturnes and with their connections, and so mitzi was forced to stay silent. this entire thing is based on this song! as time heals wounds, though, mitzi will end up doing pretty well for herself and putting achilles behind her - even getting a new boyfriend, jared!

reynard fiala, 20 - dailon’s (ex-)boyfriend, who he’s enraveled in his own weird soap opera subplot with. reynard is a relatively chill person, with an interest in art and taxidermy - just as morbid as dailon’s brother, but in a more. Normal way. genuinely a sweetheart who does not deserve what happens to them: getting cheated on with dailon’s best friend. yipes^2! while it's earth shattering in the moment, all reynard will really want to do come some time to process is to move on and for him and dailon both to heal in peace... far away from eachother (which is easier said than done since taddeo thinks reynard is super cool and loves having him over, the awkwardness between them and his brother be damned)

jared summers, 21 - the most normal person here. a longterm best friend of dailon’s, and yes, the very same one i just mentioned. he’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer - what we in the industry would call a himbo if his dumbassery didn’t cause very real damage - who had been pining for dailon for years and him dating was no deterrent, and dailon, thinking the world revolves around him as he tends to do, accepted jared’s confession so they just kinda started dating on the side. jared has the moral backbone of a pool noodle, and even after it causes dailon’s relationship with reynard to fall apart, will need a wholeass intervention to be staged to make them both realize just how shitty they’re being. after that, though, jared will end that mess and be on his way to becoming a better person himself - with the help of a sweet girl he’s met online.

jared and mitzi dating in the future is the most contrived thing on the planet but just hear me out that it’ll be HILARIOUS for achilles to check in on his ex-girlfriend and find she’s dating his cousin’s best friend, who said cousin was apparently dating on the side. very small world, it is.

anyway, thank you if you’ve somehow stuck around to read this entire thing - this isn’t even getting into jeremie’s half of this whole ordeal, which includes some of these fellas’ friends and partners, as well as more crazy rich people nonsense. it’s been very fun to think about and i do love it all dearly, even if putting it all together it’s SUCH a mess.

we don’t intend to make anything Legit out of this, it’s honestly just a fun way to pass the time. it’s the adult equivalent of playing dollhouse. in our minds this is like a 20 season soap opera but actually explaining it to other people it’s just like this

but thank you again for letting me babble i hope it was somewhat entertaining! and again, godspeed if you managed to read this much XD

#nocturnes #ichor nocturne #icarus nocturne #achilles nocturne #tommy nocturne #jael anatra nocturne #joaquin anatra nocturne #taddeo anatra nocturne #dailon anatra nocturne #mitzi moon #jared summers #reynard fiala

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