#bout have a panic attack every time she comes up tbh

[oh-mother-of-darkness]

asks (9)

Anonymous said: if you have the time, could we maybe please have your absolute /worst/ headcanons about Dick mourning Damian? before/during Spyral? btw u are an absolute gift :*

Shoot I meant to put this one into the fic today too. Oh well. Damian and Dick angst is here

Anonymous said: everytime I see something about damian it reminds me of you

The highest praise I’ve ever received :’)

Anonymous said: do you know of other batblogs that don't do ships?

Uhhhhhh I don’t think so? I can’t think of anyone else that’s entirely ship-free, but frankly I don’t follow very many people. How bout this? If any of y'all ARE ship-free, reply in the notes. That way we’ll know :)

Anonymous said: Song recs: "Centuries" by Fall Out Boy (Justice League), "Remember The Name" by Fort Minor ft. Styles of Beyond (this is THE Batfam song!), "Counting Stars" by OneRepublic (Dick), "All The Right Moves" by OneRepublic (Batkids), "Tiptoe" by Imagine Dragons (Batkids), "Warrior" by Beth Crowley (Batgirls), "Shatter Me" by Lindsey Stirling ft. Lzzy Hale (Babs), "Disarm" by The Civil Wars (Jason), "Demons" by Imagine Dragons (Jason), "Afterlife" by Ingrid Michaelson (Batkids).

Oooooooh thank you these are very nice! I hadn’t heard most of them

Anonymous said: Batfam/kids song recs! "Renegades" by X-Ambassadors, "When The Darkness Comes" by Colbie Caillat, "Royals" and "Rule the World" by Lorde, "Midnight" and "Fix You" by Coldplay and "Bad Blood" by Bastille. Also for Dick: "Pompeii" by Bastille and "Hopeless Wanderer" by Mumford & Sons.

Thanks! Idk if this was one person or two, but please continue to send me music, y'all, I like it

Anonymous said: no need to be batfamily centric, what comics would you recommend for someone getting into comics now?

Red Robin (2009)

Batgirl (2009)

Batman and Robin (2009)

Batman and Robin (2011)

Robin: Son of Batman (2015)

Batman: Under the Red Hood

Batman: The Black Mirror

Batman: The Court of Owls

Batman: Death of the Family

Good enough for a start? I don’t read a lot outside the batfamily titles, I’m afraid

Anonymous said: Omg I love your writing. Can I request Damian and Jason fighting about Damian and Jon's missions?

Hm I’m a lil backlogged just now, but I think there’s a pretty good chance that Jon will show up eventually. Just probably not real soon :/

Anonymous said: I'm new to the DC comic world, but I'm a bit curious as to how fans feel/reacted about one thing: Talia drugging and taking advantage of Bruce? Do fans feel the same about that as they would if that had happened to a female character? Was it a big deal? I was shocked to find out it had happened, and want to know how other fans feel. Did the writers ever later address it?

Oh boy

In my experience there are two schools of thought:

1) People that like Talia and choose to use the older version of canon, where Bruce and Talia were in love and the rape never happened

2) People that hate Talia

As always, I’d prefer not to say which side I come down on, and I won’t answer any personal questions related to Talia. It’s a bit of a hot button topic, and I prefer to avoid conflict. Thank you. Let’s continue.

Here’s the thing, anon-- Damian was created by a writer named Grant Morrison in 2006. Before that, there was a storyline where Bruce and Talia had a baby, and she gave him up for adoption without telling him. Historically, Bruce and Talia’s relationship has been pretty straightforward: they liked each other, and any romantic interactions were consensual. 

Morrison changed that. I can’t say for certain why, but you can read a bit more about my opinion of him over here. In Morrison’s version, Damian was conceived by rape, for eugenic purposes; they were trying to create the ideal heir from al Ghul and Wayne DNA.

Talia drugged Bruce’s drink, and yes, that is absolutely rape. No doubt about it. Rape. It’s disgusting and unnecessary, and it doesn’t really make sense, considering the thirty-five years of material that came before Morrison’s Talia. 

Because of that, it’s a divisive topic. There are a lot of people who argue that since Talia’s actions were out of character for her (and since Morrison went on to make her do other out of character things, like murdering her own son) the rape should be removed from canon. Those folks generally substitute the older storyline where Bruce and Talia were in love. 

That kind of thinking really isn't that uncommon for comic fans because the way comic canon is constructed-- multiple writers with varying skill levels who frequently produce overlapping or contradictory accounts of the same events-- presents us with multiple versions to choose from. A small and unrelated example: in his original version, Tim Drake dropped out of high school before graduation. In the n52, he graduated early. I prefer the older version, so even when I read the n52, I think of Tim as a high school drop out.

There are also canon story lines that I just don’t acknowledge, Battle for the Cowl being the easiest example. I know that the characterization is awful, so I pretend it never happened.

Morrison dramatically changed who Talia is as a character, not just at that specific point, but continually from 2006 to 2013. Since he retired, Talia has been shifting back to her older incarnation (again, see the link from above). You’re going to find a lot of folks who are happy with that, and those are likely to be the same people that edit the rape out of Talia’s history. 

You’re also going to find folks on the other side of the issue-- people that acknowledge the rape and believe that it would be wrong to edit it out of history. Morrison’s Talia, while mischaracterized, has been around for a long time with some very dramatic effects. Damian’s redemption storyline, death, resurrection, and general personality all depend on Talia’s action while Morrison was writing her-- if you choose to ignore all of that, Damian as we know him can’t exist, and he’s been a giant part of the general bat canon for the last eleven years. 

Beyond that, rape and filicide are awful, horrifying crimes, and they both happened within Talia’s canon. They’re the current version. They haven’t been retconned. As a matter of fact, Morrison isn’t the only one circulating that version-- the recent animated movies about Damian explicitly include the rape, and those began in 2014. 

You also made an excellent point when you asked about gender-- male rape victims are treated incredibly poorly in fiction and life, and I think it’s fair to argue that ignoring Bruce’s canonical rape contributes to that. Bruce isn’t the only member of the batfamily with this issue either. Dick was raped by Tarantula in 2002 (he asked her not to touch him, he was in shock and immobile, and she had sex with him anyway), and that writer (Devon Grayson) didn’t even call it rape. Would the rape of either of those men be treated differently if they were women? I don’t know. I can’t really answer a hypothetical. But it’s worth thinking about.

When it comes to Talia, I’d say my experience with general opinion has been about a 50/50 split? That being said, I am very young, and I’ve only been in this game for five years. I can’t tell you how any of this went over in 2006 because I was a ten year old at the time, and I don’t think I know anyone older who could tell me.

As far as writers go... I don’t recall Bruce’s emotional state being addressed in any way. Most of the time, writers don’t directly talk about it. Some of them seem to lean towards the earlier version by framing Bruce and Talia as a love story; however, that doesn’t mean that by omitting the rape, they retcon it. People are raped by their partners or spouses all the time. Saying that Bruce loved Talia doesn’t automatically erase the rape. Implying that Bruce and Talia had consensual sex before or after Damian’s conception doesn’t automatically erase the rape. Frankly it would be very hard to retcon, since there would have to be some kind of statement within the dialogue denying any kind of drugging. 

I don’t know if any of this will ever be addressed, but I’ve written a lot more than I meant to now, so I’m going to stop. I hope I answered all your questions. If I didn’t, you could try sending me a message instead of an ask, and we can talk more about it in private

@another-nameless-person said: The CTC story reminds me so much of my own family omg. I am so happy I'm not the only one with a big family who does this too. I'm so happy I've since moved out of my moms and can stash my own junk food at home lol

Right? I’m only just now kicking the habit of hiding my food. I also recently realized that I’m allowed to drink directly from the bottles now, which is fun

@coredesignixandnekonee said: Do you think, in a world where Nightwing knows Starfire, Oracle, Miss Martian, Red Arrow/Arsenal, and Kid Flash (Wally West1) that there's a "red headed friends of Robin/Nightwing" club where they hang out and complain about him with tea and cookies?

Wally, dipping Oreos in his milk: listen guys I know for a fact he isn’t sleeping and I think we’re gonna have to make him. Whose turn is it

[lizacstuff]

Selin is the worst, but that episode was good (ep 37 asks)

The last ask down below has spoilers for 38

(asks under the cut)

Anonymous said: Selin should honestly teach a class on gaslighting because I swear I've never seen another character willing to manipulate someone THIS much just so they weren't happy.

Every time you think it’s not possible for her to go lower, she rents a backhoe and starts digging. 

They obviously never had sex in Slovenia, but she’s willing to lie and gaslight and manipulate him into thinking it happened when he was so out of it while recovering from injuries sustained in a PLANE CRASH and had amnesia.

So lets break that down. IF she had had sex with him while he was so sick, pain-riddled and groggy from a brain injury (and other physical injuries) that it’s now foggy enough for him that he doesn’t remember, that is rape. There is no way he could consent under those circumstances. Not only that but he had amnesia and had forgotten both that he had a fiancé and had kicked Selin out of his life.  Good grief, this woman is so willing to lie and manipulate him into thinking he’s the father, that’s she confessing to a rape that didn’t happen, rather than just living the truth with Deniz???

That is so SICK. 

This was a great episode, but if she doesn’t get what’s coming to her, I will scream. At least after this Serkan’s blinders will be off when it comes to her. (I mean it is pretty humiliating that she was engaged to a man who wouldn’t touch her, and Serkan is going around shouting that he didn’t touch her, but still, there needs to be more than that.) 

Anonymous said: they really threw me for a loop when they had eda tell serkan about the pregnancy like 2/3rds of the way through the episode. i was really expecting her to say it in her letter (btw, how heartbreaking was her letter jesus) serkan immediately denying it and saying it was impossible was exactly what everyone needed! i never had a doubt in my mind tbh.. but selin is REALLY psychotic by STILL manipulating him and the fact he was sick and out of it while in slovenia.

That shocked me as well. I didn’t expect it, though am glad they did it this way. I was thinking it wouldn’t be possible because I KNEW Serkan would be able to say “It’s impossible, I was never with her” and thought that would be the end of it, but this was well done. I know it was frustrating for some in the audience that Eda wasn’t communicating with him, BUT she eventually did. She ended up telling him the same day she was sure of the information. I think that is an acceptable amount of time. So there is growth there and she didn’t up and leave without him knowing her real reasons. Also we got the satisfaction of him saying no it’s impossible AND the angst of there being enough doubt because of Selin’s sick manipulations (and willingness to confess to raping him) that we got THAT letter and the magnificent end sequence. 

THIS is the good kind of angst. This is the good kind of drama. They’ve put us through weeks and weeks of bad angst and bad drama, so while this episode had heavy emotions hanging over it, it was far easier to watch than most we’ve had. 

I’m laughing that the writers finally pulled a top to bottom quality episode out of their bag of tricks (after weeks of failure) right as we’re on the verge of another writer shakeup. 

Serkan is back! That’s the character i love. We haven’t seen him since he said goodbye in 28.  I hope he sticks around.

YES! Hoşgeldiniz, Serkan Bolat!

This did feel like the old Serkan. He did a lot of things right this episode. I absolutely loved that through the whole thing he was focused on Eda and doing everything in his power to make her feel comfortable, safe and loved. She had just rejected, in front of everyone, his marriage proposal and yet he was only focused on making sure she was okay. He was so loving and the writers finally found the romantic robot within him, you know, the guy who spouts heart-stoppingly romantic lines without even thinking.  I was afraid we’d lost that guy for good.

Kerem was wonderful in this episode, he did such a great job. As did Hande, but while 29 was her episode, I felt like this one was his.  Serkan was on the edge of a breakdown the whole episode, he was frantic, he was in-love, he was heartbroken and thanks to Kerem’s performance we could feel all of it.

Oh, and on a side note, how I want that vacation in the Maldives for Eda and Serkan. They deserve it. 

Anonymous said:   THAT ENDING WAS ABSOLUTE PERFECTION HANDS DOWN BEST OF THE SERIES I FUCKING KNEW THEYD DO THE SOULMATE HEART THING!!!! IN FACT BEST EPISODE OF THE SERIES BC THE ANGST WAS SO GOOD WTF (okay maybe not the best episode ever but I’m not calm rn)

That ending was sooooo good, probably up there with 1, 5, 11 and 26 for me. 

The whole time, I was on the edge of my seat, holding my breath. The running, Eda looking at the Little Prince book, her heart pains, Serkan in pain, but so focused on getting to Eda. I love, love, love the soulmate heart thing. The fact that she was experiencing pain, but she didn’t know why, that’s the goods right there.  

I also really love that while she was helped along by her heart pain, she made the decision herself to turn around. She’s ultimately following her own heart, which didn’t want to leave and knew it wasn’t the right course of action. We all know Serkan could have convinced her to stay if he reached her, but this way it’s fully her own decision and that will ultimately make them stronger.  

Anonymous said: They were really going for the ep 11 parallels this ep more than I thought they would. By Eda "feeling sick" and them bringing back The Little Prince.. The last scene was honestly soooo good. The emotion, the music, the angst of it all! Totally lived up to my expectations.. I just KNEW they would bring back the "connected hearts/soulmate" thing they had going on and have Eda turn around.. I'm so excited for what's next.. have you by chance seen the tattoo spoilers?

Definitely episode 11 feels, which was another episode with the right kind of angst. So many good Edser scenes in this episode. 

All the scenes in the loft were gold, in different ways. From the fun scenes of them in the kitchen making pizza (once again both Serkan and Kerem being willing to eat “after” someone else, lmao) to the heart-stopping romance of him taking care of her when she was sick and telling her he will love her forever to the angst and longing of their “last” night together.  I need to go rewatch all of them!

Yes, I saw those tattoo spoilers. An infinity symbol made from their initials E x S I ‘bout fainted when I saw them on their ring fingers!  And then in the episode when Serkan said “I love you to infinity.” Oh man, my heart.  

So what does this mean? Because we saw them with those tattoos while they were dressed in the same outfits from the airport. Does he recover from his PTSD/panic attack and they go directly to a tattoo parlor/wedding venue?  I mean... what is happening? Did they elope, or just get the rings as a promise?  

In any case, I think it’s amazing. What a wonderful way to solve the conundrum of their rings and which ones to use and worrying about them being cursed. Can’t wait to see how it comes about. 

[trashp1x1e]

Some shit went down at this Christian co op that I go to

Tw: homophobia and light swearing (I'm also on mobile and with a phone which tends to disagree with what I'm typing sometimes )

(for those who want to know I'm 14 and a pan cis guy)

SO (excuse my language) SOME BULLSHIT FUCKERY HAPPEND STRAP IN FOLKS THIS IS A LONG ONE!!! (that's what she said) goddddddddddd i'm mad i i rarely get mad and swear but boyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy howdy now here is how i might have gotten kicked out of my co op for talking about lgbt

me and my homie / closeted ex boyfriend who we shall bestow the name Link were talking about lgbt stuff like we do every time we are on break in the empty hallways and someone overheard us (probs cuz´ we were being loud)and went and talked to the owner and later in the day he told us to come talk to him in an icy calm tone (never a good thing)

Now Link was already in some hot water because in cooking my friend who we shall name Zelda (real orignal I know) made a joke (i can't remember what it was about but it was harmless ) which caused the teacher to tell at Zelda to leave and caused Link to have an anxity attack because his partner was getting yelled at and the teacher told him to get out as well when we were walking with the owner who we shall call Gannondorf (sticking with the Zelda theme) we saw the cooking teacher which Gannon was talking to so i thought "oh hey he's gonna talk to Link about getting kicked out of cooking...but wait why am i here instead of Zelda..I'm not in cooking I don't even get there before it starts " right as my mind is racing Gannon told us That talking about gender and sexuality it and it violated the code of conduct under "egregious"acts.

(I'm scared for Link's safety so I tell him to out me instead of himself cause I think his mom has some sort of grudge against the whole ass lgbt)

Y'all smell that..? Oh no sorry i just stepped in some BULLSHIT!!!! The fucking code of conduct doesn't give that any examples of egregious act s!!!!Jesus fucking Christ c'mon at least SOME examples if you are gonna send someone home turn this bullshit!

And what we were talking about wasn't that bad unless you count "hey i thought my father was gay lol i don't know why i thought that when I was really young" and "oh I'm really grateful that you accept you for liking guys" nothing NSFW just joking around and talking about lgbt..which we do every fucking time we hang out!!

(Now i'm scared for Link's safety so I tell him to out me instead of himself cause I think his mom has some sort of grudge against the whole ass LGBTQ+ )

Anyways Gannon tells us to call our parents and tell them that we need to be picked up and he would be sending an email to our parents and seeing if we could come back(which in my opinion was dumb reason to send someone home)

Link is now panicing and is calling there mom and shaking because A his mom might be homophobic and suspect that he's in the lgbtq B his mom mentally barrages him enough C it's a 30 minute drive from to get to co op so yay for Link's mom...she I'm ok because I'm out to my parents and I tell my mom and dad what's going down and my dad said he will pick me up since my mom is at work

While waiting for our parents to get here Link got up to get something and he came back with my BI-Icon/dad who I'm gonna call Impa she tells me to not out myself and to out her instead (she is a fucking legend) but its too late now and I tell her that,then a spiteful Bitch who I was decently acquainted with asked Link "are you going to cry again?" NOW LET ME TELL YOU NOBODY FUCKS WITH MY FRIENDS AND SAYS THAT TYPE OF SHIT TO THEM is what I thought...I wanted to beat the shit out of this fool but I breathe in and let the anger disappear but I made sure my words rang with force I said "that was extremely rude and unnecessary get out." because it's not worth it to get in a fight and causing legal shit. Once that bitch finally left we told Impa to go get our group of friends which we call the HomieSexuals since the Gay best friends doesn't have a ring to it

Impa returns with everyone and they were just as pissed as I was but I didn't show it because that would stress everyone out even more so my body language and tone said "Pass me a la Croix " but I was pissed and then there was my number one Ally who looked like they were bout to cry but she said she " cries when she is pissed off " that's the first time I've heard her use anything close to swearing

(insert angry as fuk picture)

My ride gets here and I say my goodbyes and I hug everyone and say "ight I'm bout to head out" to ease the tension and lighten the mood

I head out and enter my dad's car and tell him what went down and he said with how many little kids he saw n coming out the bulding it wasn't my call weather they were exposed to the lgbt or not and that that's up to their parents" first off dad you make it sound like I was dressed up as a drag queen and was handing out pride flags to kids (something I would do tbh) he was more or less pissed that i was so chill about things (which I do when I should be nervous around my friends I want them to feel safe because fuck stress) after he got after me for being chill I got home and got to texting people to see what happened while I left A Gannons wife who looks like a Karen in training you know what I'm gonna call her KIT for short, KIT told the HomieSexuals to leave Link alone and as far as I was informed they weren't being too loud...after that I got a few texts from some others that i knew and hung around with told me that this was indeed bullshit and they had my back and that it's discrimination and that's kinda illegal cause this is technically counted as a private school . so Gannon if you do some how by some medical read this that's illegal buddy...make talking about lgbt against the rules and you might have a problem on your hands 😀👉👉

I haven't gotten a response from Link to see if they are ok yet but I'll keep y'all posted

Peace out my HomieSexuals

Tldr I might have gotten expelled from a co op talking about lgbtq

Edit#1 link is ok he just got the dumb ass pubishment of not being able to cut his hair

I got the option of being able to take class but not hang out on break or leave and and get a refund

So me and my mom said “ight ama head out”

Oh oh and you know what’s funny?

Link is ok! He’s in the clear that boi is Gucci oh no no Bitch I’m done! I’m so glad I left that place! Wanna know why that fucker is ok? Cause it told him to put my PanSexy ass! And he did! Hey fucker! That’s discrimination! But we can’t do jack fucking shit against Gannon cause he called my mom instead of emailing her there isn’t proof that he fuckin kicked me out!

Oh! Btw! My friend who I’ll call Joji found out who told Gannon :D

He is an adult who high key is a boomer ngl.

But heyyyy now I won’t have to deal with baby boomer bullshit from that place now!

If I ever see Gannon I hope i can record him saying some incriminating shit

[moreauclarabel]

                       ❝ Too much light has come out of my darkness. ❞

LILY COLLINS? No, that’s actually CLARABEL MOREAU. A SIXTH YEAR student, this RAVENCLAW student is sided with THE NEUTRALS. SHE identifies as a CIS-WOMAN and is a PUREBLOOD who is known to be SECRETIVE, ANXIOUS, and INTERNALIZING but also INTELLIGENT, CURIOUS, and OPEN-MINDED. 

CHARACTER INSPO: Nell Crane ( THOHH ), Lexie Grey ( Grey’s Anatomy ), Rory Gilmore ( Gilmore Girls ), Sansa Stark ( ASOIAF ), Belle French ( OUAT ), Elsa ( Frozen ), Pepper Potts ( MCU )

TRIGGERS ( all tagged ): abuse, neglect, depression, anxiety, panic attacks

– –  the moreau family were purebloods with an extremely long and prolific lineage in france - blood supremacists to the core, they were extremists since god was a boy. but, for the most part, until the last 75 years or so, they stayed out of shit. they kept their lineage pure, they instilled elitist beliefs in their children, they disowned family members who went off the beaten path and that was that. they stayed in france, they stayed with their own, they expanded when they needed to through marriage and having children, but until the start of of the rise of voldemort ( grindlewald certainly shook them up, though ), they didn’t involve themselves. 

– –  séraphine moreau neé travers married into the family and wanted more -- why didn’t they involve themselves? why didn’t they want more? why didn’t they involve themselves? so insulated? as a travers, their family had a history within voldemort’s circle, why didn’t all purebloods aspire for the same? it was a shame, marc andré was relentlessly pushed and coerced by his wife to dedicate himself to the cause during the second wizarding war. they struggled to have children, so she thought, if we can’t have children, maybe just maybe we can have power. the moreau line dropped one by one during the second wizarding war due to this hastiness --  séraphine was brilliant at convincing them of her agenda, but she really was blinded by pure and unadulterated anger & hatred -- especially because she couldn’t fufill her duty as a wife. 

tbh though she always wanted power, she never wanted to be a mother or a fucking wife but like! she was! she was aware that was her place but she was also raised to be smart, disciplined, ruthless, hardworking. the moreau’s might’ve wanted her to take more of a backseat -- at first -- but when they realized she needed room to prove herself to them as a person and not just an object, they decided to give it to her. what did they have to lose?

– – more money ( mo problems ), more everything was poured into the war, they were SURE they were going to win. they were sure they were going to come out of this winning. they didn’t. when the aurors came for marc andré and séraphine, séraphine cleverly played on her fragility, both of them plead the imperius. with marc’s family’s record of staying away from shit -- they got off. it was the year 2000, the moreau family’s prestige deteriorated quite a bit, séra tried to hold onto the crumbling empire that was gone -- she was fucking angry. she had no child, no legacy, they had to rebuild their reputation, they had to do work that she frankly didn’t think they should’ve had to do. as far as she was concerned -- the whole wizarding world were the mad ones for accepting muggleborns and those without pure blood. but she knew she had to lay low. marc followed her lead for the six years until they finally, FINALLY, got pregnant with clara. 

– – she was it. their child was it. their child, they hoped they’d be a boy, would be their key into the good graces of society again -- and many in society were happy for the moreau’s, don’t get it wrong. they might’ve lost some prestige and some status, but they had more years of being jewels of society than being pitied under their belt. their child, their boy would carry on the legacy, the last moreau, he’d be their ticket into everyone’s shining graces again. 

this was clarabel’s first mistake. she was not born a boy. marc was happy though, he fell in love with clarabel the minute she was born, he loved her but séraphine? angry. she felt the same feeling of failure that she had after their side lost during the wizarding war. still, clarabel séraphina would have to make due. 

– – they knew something was off when her bouts of accidental magic were extremely frequent. first, they passed it off as if clara was a show off, as if it was a party trick at events, when guests came over in their townhome in paris. but clara was a very poised, an otherwise controlled, soft spoken child -- it was hard to imagine she’d show off. in fact, they took note of how clara’s nature was just extremely soft. séra didn’t understand it, she must’ve gotten it from her weak father. you coddle her too much, you give her too much attention. too much love. this didn’t effect clara as much until she was older and they realized that this problem, this party trick was not going away. this was a problem. she was a problem. 

to them it wouldn’t have been such a problem if clara could use this excess magic to hurt people, to maim them instead of creating flowers, to do terrible jinxes instead of sprouting butterflies or some really warm, good, light shit. to them, their daughter was a monster for not being monstrous like them, for not being ruthless, for being so soft. 

– –  [ ABUSE, NEGLECT TW ] the neglect, the abuse, while it was definitely a thing while clara was growing up got worse after her 11th birthday. they had enough then, séra at least, had had enough. there was not a day that went by that clara was not chastised, yelled at & put down by her mother. then neglected and not given attention by her father. her father, who was once so loving and caring, that love was rescinded. [ END OF TWs ] clara struggled to understand any of it. she knew that it was because she couldn’t control her magic, sure, pouring herself into books and anything she could to learn how. sure, she knew it was because she was and always had been a disappointment, sure, she had every reason to hate & be terrified of herself ( and deep down, she did, she was ), but she didn’t understand. she didn’t get it. it never clicked the way her magic did. this magic made her feel so good, it made her feel free, the lack of control, feeling that came from it made her elated and here her parents, the people who were supposed to love her most, hated it & her by proxy? what else did they hate that they didn’t understand? what else did they hate that just didn’t make sense?

it was why clara would never completely give in and believe wholeheartedly in blood supremacy. she’s ignorant, sure, but hateful? she couldn’t understand it. they didn’t give her reason. she was observant, kind by nature, and she just couldn’t understand why why you’d hate someone for reasons they couldn’t control. 

– – this conflict brewed in her head until her 13th birthday when after a particularly brutal homeschooling session with her mother, clara lashed out. she yelled at her mother, she sobbed, why do you hate me? why? the emotions that she had built up were so intense, so consuming, so powerful, that they expressed themselves through magic -- resulting in clara sprouting a cherry blossom tree ( she’d seen it in her books & thought it gorgeous ) in the middle of their living room. it was then they packed up their townhome in paris and moved to south of france, bordering monaco, near the water. their daughter was out of control, she was an out of control monster, she needed to be taken care of and they felt isolating and secluding her from the city, from society, from everything, was going to help. it had to.  

– – [ DEPRESSION MENTION ] while clara loved their summer home immensely, she also longed to be around people. besides her cousin odilia and her house elf, she really didn’t talk to anyone which only fed her curiosity further. she painted, she played instruments, she spent copious time alone even though the more and more she did, she craved paris, she craved the outside. she’d always been an extremely curious, open-minded child because of her parents being so vehement against being so -- so she read more and more about people and things she could never be. the only problem was, she could never read enough to replace human interaction, to replace people, to replace touch, feeling  more lonely and frankly, depressed, than she had before. [ END OF MENTION/TWs ]  her mother had always refused to let her go to regular school because of her abilities & outbursts, but as time went by and clara just didn’t get better at controlling her abilities and started to fall behind in regular school -- séra started to give up. it was clear, as much as she’d loathe to admit it, that she was out of her depth and needed help with her daughter -- she did. 

– – beauxbatons was too lax for their taste and because she was coming in the middle of the year, durmstrang didn’t have space. it was minerva mcgonagall that thought, they loathed to admit it, had the most prestige and knowledge on transfiguration that they could access for clarabel, away from french pureblood society, hopefully their child would actually learn something. though reluctant to send her to hogwarts, clarabel went and her life was changed for the better.

it was a really hard transition, from learning how to share a space with 4 other people to being around so fucking many, learning the staircases, answering riddles, but her cousin odilia paired with lily potter and her friends ( though the two groups not together, that was for sure ) helped clarabel  -- the minute her parents caught wind of her friendship with a potter they encouraged the closeness, another secret started to weight on clara heavily besides the bouts of uncontrollable magic which brought her shame. especially considering clara knew that if lily really knew her parents, she’d be furious, though the two did get over the revelation that eventually came -- if only they knew who killed harry potter. 

– – while she loves ghosts, ghouls and the great beyond she finds herself spending more and more time with spirits and her art supplies than people as the war grows more and more heavy on everyone. especially after mcgonagall’s murder, clara’s felt like she’s lost the only person she can imagine that can actually help her with magic because while it’s come a long way she still has an exceptionally long way to go. after a year of being at hogwarts, clara knows her neutrality really is morally wrong, she knows that she’s hurting people by doing nothing but she would hurt the people closest, who she loves, if she took action with either side. though clara could never have the gusto to join something like the death eaters, nor the ability, her parents definitely have encouraged her to marry into a family that has a son/child that supports it. [ ANXIETY TW ]  they want her to become the dutiful wife, the pureblood socialite of the year, but she realizes that is so far away from what she wants that she doesn’t know how to handle her future becoming her now. panic attacks and anxiety attacks, while something she’s dealt with for a very long time have become more and more frequent and the years he spent on practicing her magic seems futile when these emotions take over the way they do. [ END OF TWs ]

PLOTS: 

NEW TUTOR: maybe a student who helped mcgonagall with clara’s stuff could pick up the slack maybe a teacher could take interest? either way, clara needs someone to help her with this magic because while she’s thrown herself into dueling club, she needs a ton of help. maybe even an outside source! 

CLUB FRIENDS: art club, dueling club, frog choir, hogwarts orchestra ( piano ), clara needs friends or people she knows from those clubs!! 

PUREBLOOD SOCIETY: the society of purebloods! we have some and she’s close and related to odilia travers, so there’s a starting point. she

FIRST KISS: maybe it was at a school party that clara was dragged to? it could be cute and like whatever, honestly, clara would get a lil blushy around them and stuff. 

BETROTHED: LAMOJDJDOJDW sorry to bring this ARCHAIC UGLY PLOT but she would have one and i think it would be interesting to play out. 

THE SUSPICIOUS: maybe someone who’s just suspicious of clara and how she is? is she really that good when she has family and parents like the one she has? is she really playing a game? open to family members of lily as well tbh. maybe someone on the pureblood side who’s suspicious of clara being so close to lily and co.? 

ANNOYANCES: clara isn’t the type to be annoyed by people easily but if she is, while she’ll try to be nice, it’s very hard for her to hide it. who knows why! 

BAD INFLUENCE: clara can be quite innocent about shit, maybe this person is trying to be a bad influence on clara bc its sort of hilarious that she’s so innocent about a lot of pop culture and such??

TUTORS FOR SCHOOL: as mentioned, clara is like barely keeping up with her classes and though she’s not super behind like she was last year, she’s still struggling! someone tutor her!

OPEN TO OTHER PLOTS: i am open!!! even to amending any of these or anything!! 

[eggsyunwinftw]

Imagine Kingsman’s Enemies Break Into Yours and Eggsy’s House

A/N: More Eggsy because I would die for this egg srsly. Also, this is violent and swear a lot so you have been warned! Enjoy :P also - send in a request if you want, I’ll write anything tbh (as long as it’s Kingsman - doesn’t have to be Eggsy!)

"Hey, babe. You alright?"

"I'm good. What time are you getting home?" You replied, 

"'Bout thirty minutes. I'll bring take out?"

Now he was speaking your language. 

"Mhm, hell yes Unwin. Knew there was a reason I kept you around," You heard Eggsy's mock gasp down the phone, then a laugh. 

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"Love you too, Y/N. See ya' in a bit," He hung up the phone, and you stretched out like a cat on the sofa, one hand stroking JB's fur. Most evenings were the same, now that Eggsy had his new job. You got in from work at five, relaxed for an hour, worked on an extra project and then Eggsy arrived home with a bag of takeout (unless you were cooking, of course) and his bespoke suit looking a little rumpled. Planting a kiss on his lips, you'd set the table and the two of you would eat, then retire to the sofa for cheesy soap operas or a spy movie. It was nice - domestic, sweet and safe. You both loved the security of your little home.

That evening was set to be the same - until you heard footsteps on the porch outside.

You started immediately - Eggsy wouldn't be home for a while, and you weren't expecting any guests. Shit. Maybe they weren't there for you? You turned off your computer and shoved your phone into your pocket, pushing JB out of the room and up the stairs.

An ominous calm settled over the house. You stayed rooted to your spot in the hall, knowing full well that anyone looking through the hall window would see you if you moved. Silence. You shuffled back slightly, willing JB to stay quiet. Nothing moved. The footsteps were gone.

BANG!

Your door flew off its hinges and into the hallway as you jumped away. It barely missed you, splinters of wood grazing your cheek. Two figures stormed through the door, a man and a woman. The man pulled out a gun and began to scan each room of the house, as the woman walked towards you. You flinched as she grabbed your shirt, pulling you up to face her.

"Where's Galahad?" She hissed, and you blinked at her. 

What the fuck?

She shook you when you didn't respond, hitting your head against the wall and glaring as you cried out in pain.

"Where. Is. Galahad?" You shook your head frantically, mouth dry. What did she mean? You didn't know a Galahad - nobody had known a Galahad since the 6th century.

You clawed at her hand as it moved to grip your throat.

"I don't know! Please, I don't know a Galahad," She rolled her eyes, and yelled something out to the man in your kitchen. Maybe it was code?

You struggled to get free, and she laughed, tightening her grip enough to bruise. 

"Don't lie to me. You live with him, don't you? We'll find him anyway - tell us now and make it easier on yourself." You felt all the breath leave you. 

Eggsy. They wanted Eggsy.

Fear coursing through your veins, you shook your head frantically, spewing out the first lie you thought of. "I don't know what you mean! I live alone, I swear -" 

The woman sighed and removed her hand, letting you fall to the floor. 

Scrambling to your feet, you prepared to run upstairs, but she was too fast, grabbing your arm and pulling you back. You had to tell Eggsy - he's be fucked if he came back home soon -

The sound of muttering brought you back to reality. The two attackers were conversing under their breath, so low that you could barely hear them. You only caught a whisper, something about a King and Galahad. Wonderful. You had to be burgled by two Arthurian whack jobs. 

By then, the pair had turned their backs on you, assuming you weren't a threat anymore. With your arm throbbing, you pulled out your phone and pressed the three numbers Eggsy made you memorise by heart, then hit call. 

"537. If you're ever in trouble, you call this number, an' I'll know. Promise?" 

He'd better be right, you thought, as you shoved your phone back into your pocket.

Still facing away from you, the attacker's voices had turned lower still, and they were barely whispering - their conversation had turned to snippets and grunts.

You scoured the floor in a panic, looking for anything to defend yourself. Eggsy wouldn't be home for another twenty minutes, and even if he did arrive, the pair were there to hurt him, not you. Quietly as possible, and wobbling slightly on your feet, you picked up a splintered piece of wood and crept up behind your attackers.

Which one posed the most threat? The girl was strong, but the bloke had a gun - you sent up a prayer to every God out there, and smacked the woman on the back of the head, then ducked and sprinted up the stairs. 

You listened as her body hit the floor, and the man's panicked yell hit your ears.

You heard the man cursing, and footsteps pounding up the stairs. Anxiety rose in your chest, filling you with fear and panic. 

Damn it, where was Eggsy? You pushed a chair against the bedroom door and grabbed your lamp, crouching next to the bed. Frantically grabbing your phone, you started to call the police, when your phone screen turned black and flashed the 0% battery sign. You felt the hope in your chest fall flat, like a punctured balloon.

You were going to die in your bedroom, holding an IKEA desk lamp and curled up next to a pug. Fuck.

A gunshot could be heard, far too close for comfort. The door flew open - the man was in your room, eyes angry. He threw his gun down and strode across the room; you hit out with the lamp and he jerked back, throwing it across the room as he grabbed your hair, holding your arm behind your back. 

"I'm not gonna kill you - I need you alive. You know where Galahad is," You let out a cry of anguish, scraping your nails down his arm, but he just held your hair tighter. 

Eggsy, I need you. Please, hurry.

"I don't know what you're talking about! I don't know a Galahad, please, let me go -" Footsteps. More footsteps, pounding the stairs, showing away the chair and your eyes were closed but you could feel the woman's presence in the room -

"Let them go, you fuck." 

Eggsy.

You almost gasped in relief, but the hand clutching your hair stopped you. You opened your eyes and saw Eggsy Unwin in all his glory, eyes stormy and umbrella bared.

He raised his umbrella and you felt confusion seep through the adrenaline fog - the brute holding you had a gun and a fist the size of a hunk of ham. An umbrella wouldn't exactly take him down.  

Until you saw a bullet fly past your face, hitting the man right between the eyes and splattering your face with blood. 

His hand fell slack in your hair and you gasped in relief, legs shaking so hard that you fell forwards: straight into Eggsy's arms.

He pulled you close and you curled into his chest, breathing in his cologne. Curling a hand into his shirt, you felt tears spilling from your eyes. 

"Shh, sweetheart, I'm here. 've got you, love, it's alright. Fuck, Y/N, I was so scared," He stroked a hand over your hair, gently lifting you and moving to the bed, where he lay down and pulled you flush against his body.

"Eggsy - I didn't - didn't know what to do, they wanted Galahad but - but -" He tilted your face up to his, pressing a kiss to your forehead. You noticed his eye shining with unshed tears, panic and rage still etched in his face. Slowly, as though you were a frightened deer, he raised a hand to your cheek and ran his thumb down the graze on your face.

Taking a breath, he grasped your hand and let you sink further into him.

"Y/N, I've gotta explain some o' this to you, those fuckers, they wanted me. I'm Galahad," You gave him a confused look, and he bit his lip anxiously. 

"I figured that much, babe. They kept saying that I knew Galahad, and I guessed it must be you - they didn't seem friendly, so I told them I didn't know anything..." Eggsy's eyes widened, and he leant down to press his lips to yours, cupping your cheek and shaking his head slightly.

"I bloody love you, darlin'. And I'd rather you told them everythin' than got hurt protecting me... but you're so brave, and I'm so proud of ya'," You blushed, nuzzling into Eggsy's neck, still shaking a little out of fear. 

Sitting up on the bed, Eggsy surveyed the wreckage of the room, and let out a sigh. Keeping a tight grip on your hand, he stroked your knuckles and checked his phone. You shuffled to the edge of the bed, perching next to him. 

Standing up, he pulled you with him and wrapped an arm around your waist to keep you standing. "Come on, luv. There's a cab outside and we can go some place a bit less... fucked," You nodded, and he crouched down to peer under the bed, finally spotting his prize. 

"There you are! Was wonderin' where you'd got to, JB." The pug wandered out, fearful and tense. Eggsy scratched his head and he relaxed quickly, allowing him to pick him up and begin to walk downstairs.

"Eggsy," You said, and he turned instantly to look at you, concern in his eyes.

"Y'alright babe?" You nodded, an continued. 

"I love you. And I'm so glad you got here in time," Eggsy reached out to throw an arm around your shoulder and pull you close.

"'Course, darlin'. Just wish I'd been here sooner, but at least you're alright," The three of you walked down the stairs and piled into the taxi that waited outside the house.

Tucked under Eggsy's arm, you finally let yourself cry, all of the fear that had fuelled you suddenly dispersing and leaving you exhausted. Eggsy ran his fingers through your hair, humming something under his breath.

"Y/N, did you take out the lady in the hall?" At your nod, he grinned in pride. "Fuck yes, babe."

You shook your head, exasperated, but so, so glad that he was around.