#bons plans voyage

[ihamtmus]

.

[tabeajanssen]

on this erratic voyage, join in

[mdameninie]

Coucou, je vous partage un vieil article sur le blog

[platinumaspiration]

4t2 EA x Myshunosun SP57 Cozy Kitsch Kit

Someone asked if I was planning on converting the set and it took way less time than anticipated. Hopefully no issues 😅 If there are, let me know!

Disclaimer/Notes:

Vibe Checked Rug requires Life & Death Larger Lament Rug (included)

Mixed Signals Poster requires Bon Voyage's Travel Poster

Books & radio are functional

Set does not include the longer ceiling lights so this kit is technically incomplete

Collection file is included

Download - LC | MF

[thewertsearch]

I'm still not sure what CD's obsession with the wallet is. Has he just completely forgotten about his Harley assassination mission?

Maybe I should give him a little more credit. The guy has shown a penchant for surprisingly crafty plans before. Maybe he really does have a big brain plan to kill-

...ok, maybe I’m overestimating the Deuce a little.

Put it on, WV! Wield the Ring against your hated enemy!

... I mean, I know you won’t, but damn, I wish you would. Fight of the century, right there.

The Villein’s Exile has been inevitable from the start, and it’s been waiting for him for thousands of pages.

Bon voyage, Wayward Vagabond. We haven’t seen the last of you.

[bbernard-03]

Begin Again

~Prologue~

Summary: The weight of it all finally gets too much, and the decision is made, but will the kind words of a stranger be enough to shine a light into the blinding darkness?

warnings: suicidal thoughts, alcohol, use of y/n

__________

This was it. I was going to do it. I booked the trip, and I planned it out—my own Bon Voyage. I was going to the Cape, my happy place, the place I planned to end it all. 

Everything had gotten too much. My brain constantly felt like it was drowning in thoughts of self-hate and doubt. I was never good enough, messed everything up, and now I’d seemingly lost everyone.

I pull into the driveway of the familiar vacation home. I sigh in relief when I step outside the car, and the salty air fills my lungs. I opened the hatch, grabbing my small duffle bag and the bottles of wine I had brought. I go inside and set everything down. I scan the house slowly, taking in every detail of the living room and kitchen. Every picture, every mark on the wall, every nook and cranny. I remember all the happy times here. The family vacations, romantic getaways, and girls' weekends. All fade away slowly as the darkness envelopes my brain. 

I sigh as I look out the window, seeing the sun slowly lowering in the sky. I pour the bottle of wine into a large tumbler and then make my way down to the beach. 

I sit in the damp sand, staring at the glowing orange sky in front of me, admiring the streaks of pinks and purples that dance so heavenly together. 

“I hope this is what Heaven is like,” I whisper to myself as I take another long sip of my wine. 

I reach over to my bag and take out my journal, beginning to write my final letter. I address it; To The Person Who Finds Me. I take a deep breath and continue writing;

To The Person Who Finds Me, 

I’m sorry. I’m sorry you were burdened with this. I can’t go on- 

I’m interrupted by a ball hitting me and my journal flying forward. I lunged for it, but the stranger who had accidentally hit me already caught it. 

“I’m so sorry. My brothers and I were playing, and it got out of hand. Are you alright?” The stranger apologizes and asks. 

“I-It’s okay, accidents happen. Can I have that back?” I ask quietly. The stranger goes to hand it to me but catches a glimpse at the first few words. His face drops, and mine does too. “That’s private,” I say quickly. 

He looks back at me, his face saying it all, and I take a deep breath. 

“I don’t know what to say.” He says quietly. 

“You don’t have to say anything. We’re strangers. Please give it back.” I practically plead with him. He sits down next to me, the journal still in his hand. 

“We’re not strangers anymore, and I’m not giving it back.” He says in a calm, quiet voice. I take a slow sip of my wine before responding.

“You don’t even know my name,” I whisper, my voice molding with the breeze that swirled around us. 

“Then tell me. I’m Matt.” He says softly, giving me a small smile, the stress of the situation clear on his face. 

“Y/N.” I say quietly, my gaze intensely focused on the crashing waves in front of us. 

“Good,” he says quietly. “Now, we’re not strangers.” He glances down at the journal in his hands. “Why?” he asks, his voice so soft it was as if he thought any decibel higher would shatter me. 

“I just, I can’t, okay? I need to go.” I go to stand up, but his hand grasps my arm gently. 

“Please don’t.” He says softly. I look back at him.

“Why not?” 

“There’s always going to be another sunset to see. The next one might have red instead of pink or yellow instead of orange. There’s another book to read, another song to sing, another person to meet, another life to change. You can’t end your story before it’s done.” He speaks softly, but his voice is full of emotion; I can see the pleading look in his eyes. This man, this stranger, Matt, has shown me more kindness and effort than anyone in my life has in months. 

“Why do you care?” I ask softly, the words genuine and full of curiosity and heartbreak. 

“Your story isn’t done. I’m not going to let a beautiful girl end her story early if I can do something about it.” His words are firm but spoken gently, the meaning behind his poetic words sinking deep into my skin. I sat in the sand beside him, pulling my knees to my chest and staring at the crashing waves. 

“Tell me more about the rest of the story,” I say softly. 

I sat with him for hours and talked about everything there was left to do in life. He even coerced some dreams of mine from me, eliciting a fragment of hope inside a mind that was previously plagued by darkness. I sat with him and felt life breathe air into my lungs again. 

I sat with him and watched it begin again.

---------

a/n - possibly turning into a full fic, lmk thoughts!

**i do not consent to my work being copied, used for inspiration, or republished**

Shoutout @bernardsbendystraws for hyping me up to post this <3

[curio-queries]

ARE YOU SURE?!

Production Notes from eps 1 & 2

At this time, I'm not planning to do full response posts for these episodes. Maybe once I'm done with my Run BTS series but for now here's some production thoughts.

My initial thoughts are they've done an excellent job of merging the concepts for Bon Voyage and In The Soop while also adjusting for a reduction of members from seven to two.

To really understand this though, let's talk about some of the logistical requirements and goals of the previous shows for comparison.

Logistical Assumptions

So I think y'all do realize that there is SOME amount of planning that has to happen for a show like this to be made but honestly...the way some of you talk, it's like you think this footage just magically appears in front of an editor, capturing whatever the members happened to wander into. These aren't self-recorded vlogs. This is a full production with a crew, a budget, and a deliverable requirement; just like any other TV show.

One of the cutest moments for me was at the brewery when JM was teasing JK about a summary of what the show about. I KNOW this was the 5 second explanation that both of them would have had to say/hear dozens of times while pitching the show. That's what's so endearing about the way JM says it and JKs reaction.

They also know that statements like that, captured during filming often end up in promos. All the members are very aware as they're being filmed what footage ends up being used. We've heard them time and time again, 'please use this as the thumbnail', 'please keep this in', etc.

Jimin has always been the most vocal about questioning if the content works for their intended purpose. How many times have we heard him say 'can this even be used?' or 'this will be cut'. Usually it sounds to me like he's aware the footage they're getting in the moment doesn't align with the predetermined plan. But as is common with the footage we getnof the members, even though it wasn't according to plan, doesn't mean it's not releaseable.

The main point of JMs AYS concerns being his sickness. I'm sure he thought the show was in jeopardy of not fulfilling their deliverable requirements since it would be difficult to completely edit out. There is a legitimate concern that if they aren't able provide the agreed-upon footage, the show would never air. I'll talk more about this in my section on the edit.

For now, here's a list of SOME of the basics that have to be managed for y'all to keep in mind when consuming any kind of produced content.

Camera management: How many and what kinds of cameras need to be brought along? Are there special operators required like a drone operator. How often is the footage saved. How is it backed up? When and where are batteries charged? Who locations require early access so the crew can place stationary cameras prior to the member's arrival.

Sound management: Someone is making sure the microphones are charged, and capturing correctly. Being mic'd up is one of the easiest indicators of when the show is actively being filmed or not.

Security: this is BTS. The members didn't go anywhere without a security consultation and discussion of requirements.

Crew management: These are people that have to have places to eat, sleep, and have time off as well. They don't just vanish into thin air as soon as their job is done.

Location approval and tax requirements: Every country in the world has different regulations, incentives, and permits to be managed. The US varies these laws state-by-state.

Budget: Businesses don't stay in business by not managing the finances. We can talk more about this if anyone's interested but there are definitely some interesting points with how much on-screen time we got over the years regarding members' spending on the shows.

There's more but let's leave it at the for the moment and talk more about why I think this show was such a good blend of Bon Voyage and In The Soop from a production standpoint.

What was the initial goal of Bon Voyage?

I believe it was to promote the band and the members to viewers by giving us access to what it would be like to travel to various destinations around the globe. They knew the episodes still needed a catalyst though so there were various preplanned activities and games to motivate the editorial narrative.

BV1 was very experimental as they were obviously managing the challenges of such a production. There was a heavy emphasis on trying to make the members seem like regular ppl and seeing how they would tackle the problems many of us face with travel, chiefly budgetary and managing how to feed all of the travelers with strict spending limits.

BV2 completely game-ified the concept with the mini challenges and breaking everyone into different groups. It's very clear that this is not the strategy they preferred as BV3 was much lighter on the control. There were still some structured activities and events but the members were experienced enough to bring forth some of these moments themselves during the shoot rather than as a completely planned itinerary.

BV4 was a continuation of this with us also getting footage of the members being included in the event planning as well. I'm not saying they didn't have input in the planning of the previous seasons but by this point, production knew the members understood the requirements of a successful show as well as many of the necessary logistics. But it was still a travel show with some key events to fuel the storytelling.

How about In The Soop?

Enter pandemic. They obviously still wanted to do another show once they worked out what was permissible to film at the time. But now the changing of locations would not be a part of the engine. How were they going to ensure they still had a viable show? They did put in place a semblance of their previous formula with that silly daily schedule (that was ignored nearly to the point of being completely edited out) and a couple of events like the 94s mountain hike and vhope's car drive. But overall, they realized they had to rely purely on the members to find story moments and insure they were captured. Their trust was rewarded though and ITS1 was a hit.

Now ITS2 is a more interesting case. I do believe it may have started with the same intent as season 1, but it must not have been long in the pre-planning stage before a new goal was added: controlled access of a BTS tourism destination. I'm sure I'll go further into this topic whenever I do finally make posts on this series, but it's very plain to even the casual fan that the ITS2 location was a planned financial investment.

Enough about the location though, what were the filming objectives? Honestly? Not much. The members were clearly ready for a break and were mired in the uncertainties of the time period. Balancing the focus of the english-solo-songs era with the preparations for ch.2 solo activities resulted in an odd lack of direction for the members, which is evident in the show. Yes, there are great moments and segments but there's no progression and very little footage of all the members all together except during certain meals.

But ITS2 is still hailed as enough of a success that there was justification to add to the franchise with Tae's friendship installment.

But what does all this mean for Are You Sure?

We'd heard from many of the members during ch.2 that they would like to continue Bon Voyage so it honestly wasn't surprising that we'd eventually get another travel show featuring our beloved BTS members. Early in episode 1 of AYS, Jungkook says he's never traveled so loosely before. However this show was justified, it definitely wasn't planned to be another hyper-detailed barrage of JM & JK going from activity-to-activity like early BV but it also couldn't be as aimless as ITS. For as long as the conversation was surrounding the name of the show, we never hear them suggest Bon Voyage 5 because AYS was never intended to be another installment of that series.

This is why I said AYS is a perfect mesh of the two kinds of shows. Granted, the first episodes definitely had some unexpected obstacles due to the unexpected health concerns but I think the production team managed it well. Although, I'm convinced there's at least one activity they did have planned that had to get scrapped to let our poor guys rest and recuperate. I also wouldn't be surprised if by the time they started filming in the US, they hadn't locked another destination and schedule with how unsure JM & JK are when talking about the scope of the show. (And I hope we get some update on the poor motorcycle, I want to know how it got where it needed to be from the rainy grocery parking lot).

The Edit

The overall tone of the show is very lighthearted. Kind of surprisingly so for me. It's not the vibe I would have necessarily expected but it's one of the points that leads me to say they have merged BV and ITS so wonderfully.

A major aspect of BTS's content is usually the chaos and shenanigans the surround the members. Now much of that is emphasized in the context of one of these shows but I honestly wouldn't have been surprised if the edit had tried to make up for the lowered member count. Instead, it's a very laid-back edit. The quality and tone of the on-screen captions was world's different from some of the BV seasons (thank goodness!)

Now, about Jimin's illness. There's a reason why the coverage is cut the way it was to only bring us in on the story once both JM and JK started talking about it lightheartedly. If we'd had all of that footage chronologically, we also would have had building tension throughout the day's activities. But this way, we're able to enjoy the show per the original pitch as much as possible.

This show would have been planned during the time when the members were under heavy scrutiny for how successful they'd be as individuals and how their content will be received without the full seven members. Again, the way some of y'all talk about these shows, it's like you don't realize that the members are aware of how this content is structured. They are. They absolutely are.

Also, a big part of greenlighting AYS would have been a discussion of how it could be made with just 2 of the 7 members. JM and JK would have to take on a lot more of the burden since there wouldn't be other member to cut to. The solo vlogs we got at the beginning of ch.2 absolutely would have been used as a proof of concept. There are easy comparisons to make between JKs camping vlog and the camping scenes we got in these first AYS episodes.

Another key justification of the show could have been as promotional material for the current musical releases. While they did highlight quite a bit of both JK and JM's work in these episodes, the narrative definitely wasn't tilted in the direction of promotion. I love that because it's absolutely not what I would have expected.

What am I looking forward to for the remainder of AYS?

From a production standpoint, I'm already curious about the following:

Will there be any tonal shift? Specifically now that JM and JK have some uncertainties about the viability of their US adventure. Will it seem like they're compensating?

We know Tae is going to be in at least the next episode. How is this going to handled narratively and will there be any visible contradictions from that narrative in the production?

At what point was the final quantity of locations and shoots locked down? And when/if will JM and JK make mention of this.

If/How will the music promotion narrative shift? It's clear that this episode could not have been released until after MUSE's release once they decided to keep the footage of JK listening to Who. But when was that decision made?

What are your thoughts on the production of AYS so far?

Editing to add a link to my post on episode 3. Surprisingly I had a lot more to say!

Are You Sure?! Production notes from ep 3.

And there has been even more to say so here's a MasterList link

Are You Sure?! MasterList

[shuadotcom]

Main Dish | HJS (M)

☐ Summary: When lunch ends up being inedible, Joshua has to pick something else to eat.

☐ Pairing: Joshua x Afab!Reader

☐ Genres & AUs: Smut, fluff, established relationship!au, absolutely porn without plot

☐ Rating: 18+ (MINORS & AGELESS BLOGS DNI. YOU WILL BE BLOCKED)

☐ Warnings: Profanity, cunnilingus, fingering, dirty talk, pet names (baby, baby girl, sweetheart, honey, good girl), overstimulation, multiple orgasms, squirting

☐ Words: 3.2k

☐ Note: This fic is brought to you by my lack of cooking skills and my insatiable need for Joshua. It was also written for @kpopsblackcreatorsociety Bon Voyage Bingo event! The bingo square/prompt for this fic is camping.

Thank you @horanghater for being my beta ily 🥰

☐ Net Tag: @kflixnet

“Please don’t go off, please don’t go off, please do-”

BEEEEEEP BEEEEEP BEEEEEEP

“Goddamnit!” Working as fast as possible, you grab the pan from the hot stove top, removing it from the heat. The blare of the smoke detector rings out through the apartment and you have to act quickly to open all the nearby windows, waving away the smoke in the air with the dish towel. 

Once the smoke mostly clears and the alarms have subsided, you survey the scene in front of you. Grumbling in frustration you eye the now burnt tofu on the stovetop and let out a disappointed sigh. You had just wanted to cook something fun and new for your boyfriend. He’s been camping with his friends for the past week and you figure he would appreciate a home-cooked meal but, as usually happens with you in the kitchen, it turned out to be a disaster. 

You weren’t a cook by any means, but you knew how to get by with very basic skills. Boiling eggs, making stove-top ramen, and using the air fryer slash toaster oven you had begged for on your last birthday. 

All of the essentials of cooking. 

Tonight, the plan was originally to try a new pan-fried tofu recipe you saw on TikTok because it looked yummy. Instead of looking like the wonderfully golden-fried nuggets that they were supposed to resemble, all that sits in the pan in front of you now are uneven little pieces of charcoal. 

Great. Wonderful. Amazing.

Standing in the middle of the kitchen, gnawing at a hangnail in distress, you didn’t even take notice of your boyfriend watching you from the entrance of the room, admiring how cute you looked in your little lounge clothes and apron. His entrance had been drowned out by the blaring of the smoke alarms.

“Don’t chew on your nails, honey, it’s not good for you.”

Joshua’s voice is much louder than the music you are playing from your phone on the counter and you nearly leap into the air when you hear him.

“Jesus, Shua! You scared the shit out of me!” Clutching your chest, you reach over and pause the sound from your phone.

He chuckles as he approaches you, wrapping his arms around your waist and drawing you in for a hug. 

“Sorry, baby. I couldn’t help it.” He apologizes, but the smirk on his face shows he’s not really that sorry.

Joshua places a kiss and your waiting lips and your annoyance at being jump-scared fades. He smells like outside and a little bit like sweat, but underneath that, he still has his usual warm, homey scent that belongs only to him.

You let him take your breath away a little while longer, arms wrapping around his neck to bring him closer. He rests his head against yours when you pull away, his eyes tired but still sparkling down at you.

“How was your guys' camping trip?”

“Well, Mingyu found a spider in his tent and tore the whole thing down trying to get out, Soonyoung got sunburnt and fell into the lake, and Vernon forgot his allergy medicine and spent all week sneezing.”

“So the usual shenanigans?”

With a chuckle, Joshua nods, looking you up and down. “Basically, but I’m having a much better time now that I’m back here with you.” He leans down to kiss your forehead and you still let yourself get flustered by his sweet words, even after three years together. “And what’s going on in here?” He asks when he finally pulls away, eyes looking over your head at the charred remains of your lunch.

“Nothing, just me fucking up in the kitchen again.” Pouting, you cross your arms, wincing as Joshua steps up to the counter, inspecting what’s remaining of the tofu.

“Ah baby, they don’t look that bad…” He uses the chopsticks you left nearby to poke at a piece, raising it to his face and sniffing it.

“Shua, don’t-” Before you can stop him, he pops it into his mouth, chewing extra slowly. Your boyfriend, always so sweet to you and considerate of your feelings, looks like he’s in physical pain as he crunches the food, his nose wrinkling with each shift of his jaw. With a sigh you walk over and grab a sheet of paper towel, holding it up to his mouth. “Spit it out.”

“It doesn’t taste terrible…” he mumbles between chews, eyebrows furrowing as he does.

“Joshua, just spit it out!” At your insistence he does, expression apologetic.

Joshua watches you take the rest of the tofu and throw it away, shoulders slumping in defeat. He moves across the kitchen to stand behind you, wrapping you in his arms. 

“Don’t be upset, baby. It’s just some tofu.”

“But I fucked up lunch for you! I just wanted to make you a homemade meal since you���ve been eating over a campfire all week.” Joshua coos at you, pulling you tighter against him.

“Aw, sweetheart, you didn’t have to do all this in the first place. I think we both know that you would’ve been better off ordering something. There’s a reason I do most of the cooking, remember?” He laughs, his tone teasing.

Gasping, you spin in his hold, round eyes staring up at him as you pout for what feels like the twentieth time tonight. “Joshie, are you saying I can’t cook?!”

Faltering, Joshua’s eyes dart back and forth, strategically planning his next words. 

“I - I didn’t mean that you can’t cook, Y/n. I just -”

“I’m kidding, Shua. Of course, I know I can’t cook.” He’s clearly relieved, rolling his eyes at your giggles. 

Joshua leans down to pepper your face with kisses, holding you close, ignoring your feeble attempt to escape his grasp.

“I guess it’s a good thing then that I wasn’t even thinking about what I’d eat for lunch.” He places a final kiss on your cheek before pulling back to gaze at you.

“You weren’t?”

“Of course not. How could I even begin to think about lunch when all I could think about was tasting you again?” Joshua smirks at you, laughing when you scoff, your turn to roll your eyes at him.

“How did I know you wouldn’t even be a little bit subtle about wanting to have sex as soon as you got back?” 

“Because you know how addicted I am to you and how much I think about you.” You and Joshua are chest to chest, his hands tracing your body, fingertips pressing lightly into your curves.

Joshua’s voice has already lowered an octave, eyes flickering to your lips. You’re in no way surprised at how quickly Joshua turned the situation from silly and domestic to horny, but you’re not bothered in the slightest, more than happy to fuck your boyfriend again. A week has been far too long of a time to go without Joshua’s cock inside of you.

“Oh, so you were thinking of me on your trip? Thought you’d be too busy grilling meat and playing games with the boys.” 

“Baby, I’m always thinking about you, but especially when we’re not together.” Joshua ducks down, his nose brushing yours. 

“And what about me were you thinking about exactly?” You whisper, holding your breath as you await his next words.

“Well, I was thinking all about how sweet your cunt is and how I couldn’t wait to come home and devour you.”

Somehow you hadn’t registered that Joshua walked you back until the counter pressed into your lower back, trapping you between it and Joshua’s firm body.

“Hmm…then I guess lunch is served whenever you’re ready to eat,” Tilting your head up, your lips brush against Joshua’s. You shift your leg forward, knee brushing against the crotch of his sweatpants. A grunt slips out of him when you make contact with his half-hard cock and he surges forward, lips meeting yours in a feverish kiss. 

Joshua’s soft lips move against yours, his hands cupping your face to keep you close. Your hands trail up Joshua’s thick arms, tracing every ridge and dip of muscle. You’ve never been shy about how much you enjoy the new gym rat era he and a few of his friends have entered, making sure to be very obvious about the way you appreciate the new muscle he’s worked on gaining. He also doesn’t hide just how much he loves how the bulkier version of him turns you on, your boyfriend flexing for you so the muscles tense and loosen a few times under your fingertips.

Those same strong arms move to hold your waist, holding onto you as he swallows every pant and tiny whine that you let out. Joshua’s tongue wraps around yours and sucks, the kiss descending into lewd territory as Joshua grinds against your thigh still wedged between his legs.

The kiss feels like it goes on forever, which is in no way a complaint. Joshua’s hands wander all over your body, hands skating down to grab at your bare thighs and up to your ass, grabbing a handful to bring your hips impossibly closer. It’s almost embarrassing how wet you are, feeling your cotton panties clinging to you with each shuffle of the fabric. 

Joshua seems to read your mind as he finally moves a hand under your apron and into the waistband of your shorts and panties, his finger grazing your pussy making you jolt and buck into his hand.

“Would you look at that? You’re fucking drenched just from my kisses?” To illustrate his point, he pulls his fingers from your shorts, holding the wet digits up to showcase your juices to you both.

“Fuck, yeah, I need you so badly. I missed you so much.”

Joshua hums, popping his fingers into his mouth, eyes closing as he sucks them clean, savoring your flavor. The scene is enough to have you rubbing your thighs together, easily recalling just how good his tongue feels when it’s on you.

“Mmm, I missed you too, baby. And speaking of, I’m starving, so I think I’m ready to eat now.”

Joshua plants his hands on your hips and turns you around so his front is pressed against your back, walking with you out of the kitchen and around to the island, leaving kisses on the back of your neck as you go. When you reach the side of the island that you usually sit to eat at, Joshua’s nimble fingers untie your apron and lift it over your head, tossing it to the floor. Your shorts and panties come next as he slides the fabric down your legs, letting them pool at your feet.

Your boyfriend makes a sound of appreciation at the sight of your bare ass, big hands squeezing your cheeks before landing a firm smack on one of them. He helps you up onto the island, sitting you near the edge. Joshua pulls up a stool in front of you, spreading your legs wide, and letting out a low whistle.

“Look at all of this, so messy and sloppy all for me.” Joshua leans forward and places kisses on the inside of your thighs, inhaling your scent as he does, small moans rumbling in his throat.

A few whimpers slip out of you with each kiss over your hot skin, Joshua’s breath hitting your core only serving to make you wetter. Joshua loves eating you out, always talking about how good you taste and how much he loves the way you smell when you’re dripping for him.

He doesn’t leave you waiting for long this time (another thing Joshua loves is to tease you, but he seems to want you bad enough to spare you this time) as his tongue finally licks at your clit, the muscle flattening and adding much-needed pressure. 

A squeal of Joshua’s name tumbles out of you as he licks a fat stripe from your hole to your clit - once, twice, three times, each go making you twitch underneath him. Your legs almost snap shut, but his firm grip keeps them open.

“Nuh-uh, keep your legs open, baby girl. I haven’t even started eating my meal.”

Your eyes stay trained on him as his hands grab the back of your thighs, pushing them toward you. You lie on your back in a more comfortable position, hands trembling as they hold onto the front of your shirt in anticipation.

“I’ll never get tired of eating you out, you know that? Never get tired of how fucking sweet you taste on my tongue.” To further his point, Joshua’s thick tongue slips into your pussy, lapping at your gummy walls, letting his nose brush against your clit.

“F-fuck!” Your hands dart down, fingers threading through his brunette strands, tugging at the root as he tongue fucks you on the kitchen island. 

Every grunt and groan that Joshua lets out is deep, deep enough that the vibrations can be felt throughout your whole body. You can’t help but thrash underneath him, loud obscene slurping sounds fill the room as he works. Joshua’s hands keep your thighs pinned down, preventing you from nearly falling off the counter while his face presses closer to your cunt. 

He eats you out like a man starved, a week without your pussy proving to be much too long away for him. The tip of his tongue is still buried inside of you, flicking at your walls at an almost impossible speed. 

Fire begins to quickly pool in the pit of your stomach, nails digging into Joshua’s scalp which only spurs him on more.

“Shua, b-baby so good!”

“Mmph?” You can’t quite hear what he says but it sounds like it has a questioning tilt at the end.

“‘M gonna cum!”

That must’ve been what he was getting at because he picks up the pace and moves his hold on you to the sides of your thighs and makes you wrap your legs around his head. Joshua uses this new angle to force you to rock your hips against his face, leaning into you so far that when you glance down, all you see is the top of his hair which you’re still holding onto for dear life. 

Rolling your hips you go with his movement, desperately riding his face. Joshua lets you, his tongue drilling into you, bringing you closer and closer to the edge.

When you do cum, you stiffen almost painfully as heat spreads through your body, your thighs squeezing around him like a vice, holding him in place. Your boyfriend happily continues lapping at your sensitive core, murmurs of praise accompanying his coos of delight.

“So fucking tasty,” Joshua sighs as he pulls back, finally taking in air through his mouth. He glances at you, watching your chest heave as you catch your breath. Without a second thought, with your hole still clenching around nothing, Joshua shoves one of his thick fingers into you, drawing a gasp out of you. 

“Shua!?”

He has the audacity to blink up at you, faux innocence on his face along with your juices still shining on the bottom half of his face.

“What? I want seconds.” He shrugs, adding a second finger which has you cursing, senses on overdrive. Joshua’s plush lips are back on your clit, sucking the nub into his mouth, ignoring the way your nails dig into his hair again, tugging on his soft locks. 

“Ngh, Josh-Joshua! Please!”

“Please what, baby?” He mumbles, lips still suckling on your clit, your legs quivering as they rest on his shoulders. His fingers have no trouble finding that soft squishy spot inside of you that has your eyes crossing, the squelching sound of your wetness ringing in your ears.

“I’m - I just…” You trail off when your boyfriend curls his fingers, the overstimulation derailing your train of thought as you feel another orgasm hurdling toward you. Joshua smirks up at you, loving the way he can literally watch as your brain short-circuits for him - because of him.

His lips go back to your clit, suctioning around the bud. His fingers delve into you faster, your velvety walls hugging his digits, coating them in more of your sticky arousal. Sweat beads at your hairline and tears prick your eyes as Joshua throws you into another orgasm, electricity coursing through your veins and a choked, desperate cry of Joshua’s name tumbling from your lips. 

“Yeah, just like that, good girl.” He purrs against your overworked pussy, slowly dragging his fingers out of you. You whimper at the loss, only for the sound to be replaced by a loud wail, Joshua’s slick fingers rubbing rough, frantic circles against your clit. 

“Shit! Fuck, Shua I’m - fuuuck!”

“Come on baby girl, one more. Make a mess all over the fucking counter.” The pads of his fingers drag against your clit, body arching as you flail your hands, scrambling across the marble of the counter looking for something to ground you.

The sensation borders on painful, the sensitivity too much to handle as the pleasure builds and your muscles spasm. When you cum this time, it knocks the wind out of you, your eyes rolling back, your mouth open in a silent scream. Joshua leans down, eyes watching with glee as you squirt all over his hand and arm, getting your mixture of arousal on his shirt. He even cranes his head down, mouth open to drink up the remaining spurts of your release.

He rubs lazy circles over your puffy clit, letting you ride out the rest of your orgasm until your hoarse voice begs him to stop and he does, but not before wiping up as much of your wetness as he can on his fingers and popping them into his mouth once again.

“Fucking hell, Shua!” You huff out when you’ve finally sucked enough air back into your lungs.

“What? I told you I was starving.” His cocky grin earns him a half-hearted kick to his shoulder using the minuscule amount of energy you have remaining. He catches your leg, placing a soft kiss on your ankle before he straightens up and sits back to admire your ruined state.

“Are you going to help me up or leave me here for the rest of the day?” 

“I should eat all of my meals in the kitchen, but I suppose I can help you down.” Joshua laughs at your half-hearted threat to kick him again and offers his hands to you. He helps you sit upright and slowly slides you off of the island. 

When you’re back on shaky feet, you move to pick your bottoms up, but he stops you by pulling you against him.

“Wh-”

“Oh, you don’t need those. I’m gonna order some lunch for us, but I need dessert before it gets here.” He presses his hips forward, his rock-hard dick pressing against your ass. Joshua once again envelops you in his warm embrace, lips skirting against the shell of your ear. “That okay with you, baby?”

Between the orgasms he pushed out of you only minutes ago and the dip in his voice, wetness collects between your legs again, pussy clenching at the thought of Joshua fucking you for real.

“That’s more than okay with me,” you rasp, clearing your throat. “I’m feeling pretty empty myself and am dying to be stuffed.”

[lilacxquartz]

PRETTY LITTLE TRINKET

harpy shoko ieiri x reader

plot: while lost at sea, you find yourself saved by a monster yet unable to leave — themes: yandere shoko, monster/human romance, f!reader, time period: early 1900s, alternate universe: mythical creatures

chapter 1 of 5 • next chapter > • main masterlist • ao3

1. Bon Voyage

If you were being completely honest, then you weren’t quite too sure as to why you took on this job in the first place. Perhaps you were just… desperate enough to escape from home. The prospect of working didn’t seem all too terrible if it meant not being cooped up indoors anymore, especially with the threat of an arranged marriage looming just around the corner.

The problem was, however, that very few vacancies had accepted women. That was the most frustrating part about this whole ordeal as you were forced to search a little further than you would have liked. Realistically speaking, the big city was your best bet since they let just about everyone work there now. Before you set out though, your mother tried again and again to talk you out of such, in her eyes ‘troubling’ prospects, pleading with you to reconsider. Perhaps it wasn’t a case of her not wanting for you to explore the world, maybe she had her dreams to do such a thing too—if even just vicariously, but the world she knew was an unforgiving one and it would kill her to see you get hurt.

You understood that sentiment perfectly well, but you also didn’t care. If this was your only given life then what fun was there in obeying the norm when you had the opportunity to potentially defy it?

What fun was it, after all, to spend all of your remaining years left on this earth playing the role of a devoted housewife when there was so much to see of the world?

You wanted to experience it all.

You wanted to live.

You supposed that’s what did it, then. When you found the open vacancy that sought to fill out the role of a crew member aboard an embargo ship, it was almost like a sign for you. The positon itself was buried underneath all sorts of ads in the local paper and the salary wasn’t otherwise too different from what was offered in the city, but it was a place to work with both room and board.

The captain, who upon seeing the almost desperate and sheltered look that was apparent on your face could have abused his role when taking you on, but he never did. Supposedly, you reminded him of his late daughter who he had lost to the winter sickness, so from the goodness of his own heart, whether you were qualified or not, he took you in. The two of you both got on very well too and soon enough, the ship began to feel like a second home.

The work itself wasn’t too bad either, although it was exhausting at times. Since the ship was a cargo vessel, it meant that a lot of the ‘travel’ was linear as it cruised from one harbour to the other. However, sometimes, during the less busy seasons, the ship would at times sail towards the more leisurely spots. You’d dock together as part of the crew and the captain would personally direct you to all sorts of activities and delicacies alike—perhaps it would have been things his late daughter would have liked—but you didn’t quite mind at all, the two of you, helped each other heal in one way or another.

In a way, regardless, you were seeing the world as you had intended to do so from the very beginning. You were happy, even, with your place in life for the first time in forever to such an extent that you refused to go home—hoping to continue this sort of life for as long as you could help it.

However, what with the sea being a surely unforgiving place; it seemed that fate had a different sort of plan in store for you. It was a dark and stormy night, a setting that wasn’t all too unfamiliar when sailing through the murky depths. The ocean was seldom forgiving and that one particular night was more violent than usual. Heavy, crashing waves punched into the ship with such a strong impact, that when it leaned, you could hear as the vessel declined and creaked and waned and then finally… capsise.

It was an unreal experience to have woken up to such horrors, since just moments before you were fast asleep, blissfully unaware of what was churning on the surface. A part of you wondered if it was just the case of being understaffed due to a low hire season, but just from hearing the roaring force of the waves just outside, you quickly understood that there was never any hope to be had in the first place.

No, this voyage was a doomed one from the minute that it had begun to set sail.

You scrambled forward either way, tearing out of your chambers as you dove head first into the quickly flooding hallway. Everything was leaning to the side, the scene disorienting you with the muddied direction. Some things were on fire in the distance, just barely illuminating the way. For the most part, you had to use your own internally mapped memory to swim your way out. You clawed desperately through the misdirected waters that pushed and kneaded you back and forth, hissing sharply strained whispers as your leg snagged over what felt like sharp metal. Your arms too, quickly grew tired as they thrashed towards the surface, just barely making it out in time to climb aboard the sinking wreck. Just like everyone else before you, however, you were soon hurled toward the dark waters, ready to be consumed by the pull of the unwavering void.

A fiery sensation flooded into your lungs; the feeling of molten lava trickling into your core and settling far and deep took over your senses. You couldn’t even breathe anymore as an unseen force prevented both the entry and exit of air alike.

No regrets were however had as you tried your best to at least float towards the surface, wherever that could have possibly been. Even despite your near-early end, you would have died free in the open world and thankfully not a prisoner to a life you knew that you would have hated.

So when your vision at last declined, surrendering to something beyond just the darkness; you simply just… accepted it all.

~~~

Much to your surprise, you managed to wake up. Somewhere bright. The sensation of grass and branches alike poked at your bare skin, leaving you in a perpetual state of slight discomfort. In a spur of confusion, you tore upwards to make sense of what you were feeling exactly, choking out lodged water out of your lungs that then oozed down your chin, mixing with dribbling saliva. A sharp sensation of searing pain swept through your leg when you tried to adjust your position, finding that there was tightly bound seaweed clinging around your thighs in a makeshift bandage of some sort. Your mind drifted back to the memory of you hurting yourself the night(?) before, but you couldn’t have been too certain.

The pain was a harsh reminder that you were essentially trapped wherever it was you were, nothing seeming familiar in your immediate line of sight.

In fact, where were you exactly?

You looked all around you, finding that you were on a cliff edge of some sort and that you were sitting in the middle of a giant nest. Some sort of fear gripped you, thinking that you might have been a snack for some sort of vulture, but then your mind quickly dismissed the thought. Such big birds didn’t exist… did they?

It must have been something else.

As your mind raced for answers, your train of thought was suddenly stifled by the roaring flutter of descending winds settling over your location. Looking up, you tried your best to make sense of what you were looking at exactly, but you were completely and utterly stumped.

Was this a man? A woman? A bird?

(…Both?)

Whatever they were, they knelt immediately, extending out their clawed feathered fingers to tug and tighten the seaweed wrapped around your leg, securing it further into place, slapping away your hand into submission upon your protesting action.

“Stop,” they said. It was a woman’s voice, sounding oddly human. There was a strong hint of compassion laced in her tone, lulling you into the belief that all was just fine. However, the more you looked at her, the more you were left confused. Was this a… monster?

You stopped fretting either way, half believing whatever this was to be a dream—despite it all feeling so shockingly real.

The bird-monster leaned you back down into her nest, her eyes fixated on your weary pupils before settling down next to you. Her feathered form kept you warm despite the harsh coastal wind. “Rest,” she commanded, her words almost hypnotic, driving you off into a deep sleep whether you wanted to go under or not.

Maybe the answers could come later, then—but given just how bizarre this whole thing was—maybe also not.

For now, you needed to first recover.

Then you could find the appropriate time to freak out and question and attempt to make sense of this whole thing.

Who was she… and why did she save you?

this is part 3 of lilac’s bite sized yandere nightmares

[junedenim]

2003

beneath the boardwalk, part 1 (series masterlist)

bigger boys & stolen sweethearts

warnings: long-haul series, drug usage, fluff, angst, etc.

word count: 13k

As a favour to my friend, Joanie, I went to Barnsley College. She was my best friend and it was between that or going to Wakefield College. I didn't want to go to Wakefield. Everyone from Wakefield went to Wakefield College. Albie, my recently ex-boyfriend was going to Wakefield. So, I went to Barnsley.

I decided to study English Literature solely because I had no idea what else to do. I hated reading at that age and I don't know why I fathomed in my mind that it would be a proper fit for me other than the fact I liked to write. Still like to write.

Barnsley was more about my "friends" than education. Joanie and I got drunk most weekends and my whole friend group seemed to indulge in some version of friend-cest with one another. By the end of that first year, it seemed like everyone had seen a peek of someone else. I'm sure I got around more than most. I don't think I even enjoyed it half the time. I don't think most people enjoy sex at that age other than the rush of doing it and the inevitable quick release.

Matt seemed to be the only guy I wouldn't touch. I had met Matt in a photography class we both took and he became a good drinking buddy. At those booze-filled parties where people's noise would practically shake the building, Matt and I would sneak out and share a smoke with one another.

One night, as we were sitting on the curb next to each other, he asked me, "How come out of everyone at this school we've never hooked up?"

He passed me the cigarette. "I don't know," I told him. "I just don't see you that way, Matt."

"Yeah," he agreed. "Think it would be too weird."

Right before our first year was finished, Matt told me his band had their first gig in a couple of weeks. He didn't say it like an invitation. It was all casual, like, "There's this place called The Grapes. The band's got a gig there."

"Oh, cool," I told him. I'm not sure if he was expecting me to show up or just inform me. "Do you want me to come?"

He shrugged and took a bite out of the sandwich he was eating. It was silent for a moment and I thought that was it until he said, "You could bring a couple of your friends. Joanie or something. Make a night out of it."

I had already been informed by both parties that Joanie and Matt had hooked up last week but neither knew that the other had told me. I knew I wouldn't be seeing most of my friends over the summer and it felt like a rather nice bon voyage event.

So, I invited a group of friends like Matt requested. Rosie, Will, Claire, AB, and, of course, Joanie. Will and I had a complicated relationship, to say the least. We'd go back and forth from having sex like rabid bunnies and hating each other. When I invited him that night I had expected that I would end the night in bed with him. I'm sure he had the same impression.

AB was the gentleman of the group and in typical fashion resigned to being the designated driver. The rest of us were planning to get completely hammered.

The Grapes was bigger than I had expected. When I pictured a band performing their first gig, I suppose I imagined a garage somewhere. It wasn't giant by any means but there was a little stage that they all would squeeze on together.

I had met Alex before—in passing at any number of parties. I can't remember if I had been introduced to him before I knew Matt but I recognized his face somewhere. Like I had seen it before in some picture. I was likely too intoxicated at our first meeting to make much sense of what I said or what he said but the next time I was introduced to him, at this Grapes's show, he looked nervously fidgeting like he was desperate for a cigarette or something to choke back on.

"Jeanie, right?" He pointed his finger at me and smiled uncomfortably.

"Jane." I corrected him. To be honest, I think I only remembered his name because Matt told me he was the lead singer. I couldn't picture Alex as a lead singer.

He was endearingly embarrassed by his mistake and repeatedly went, "Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry." Like he had just rear-ended me or something. "Jane. Jane. Jane. Jane." Like it was his mantra helping him calm himself.

"It's fine," I told him. I was itching for a cigarette now too. It was awkward and the air at The Grapes felt too hot and sticky for North England.

"I'm Alex." He stuck his hand out like he was being interviewed for a job.

I shook his hand and said, "Good luck with your show." I smiled and passed by him walking over to where Claire had grabbed our seats. Something tells me his eyes were following me as I left.

I don't think of myself as some style icon. Others have placed that upon me, which is quite the honor, but at 17 I didn't feel that so much. However, that night I felt comfortable. It was a feeling I hadn't felt in my skin since maybe nursery. In my opinion, I hadn't worn anything marvelous. It was this orange and red plaid mini skirt with a red tank top I had tucked into it. I had brought a red cardigan with me if it got cold. I didn't often coordinate my outfits but I suppose it felt like a special occasion to me. I didn't think there was any need to impress anyone. So, on a rare instance, I was dressing for myself.

I think Will must have been grabbing my ass for half the show. I didn't tell him otherwise but I think if I was older I would have rejected it. Back then I didn't think I had the option. I regretted wearing that skirt.

They didn't blow me away but they were better than I expected. Matt was cocky when talking about them but Matt is still cocky talking about anything. But most times, he's being honest. I suppose I have to agree with his comment: "We're fucking brilliant. You'll see one day, J."

I didn't think I would ever talk to Alex again. I've been trained to avoid those awkward conversations and Alex was often the type to stay huddled in a corner, sometimes with a drink, sometimes with a lass. I hang around my own bunch. My arm rarely strayed from wrapped around Claire's side and we affectionately called each other "babe" just to have someone call us "babe."

Later that night, I accepted my fate of having to go out for a solo smoke. Matt was practically grinding up against Joanie at this point of the night. I went out and there Alex was, leaning up against the wall, having a smoke.

I decided to act like I didn't see him, which was probably rude but I didn't think he'd want to talk to me either. He was against the left side of the wall so I went to the right.

"'Ey, Jane." He called out to me.

It took me a second to get my feet to move and it took me too long to realize it was him calling me. I turned and he stood straight, staring at me. I felt myself get warmed in the cheeks with a mix of shame and flattery. I couldn't tell where he was heading with this and Will's hand had been on my ass for the past hour.

"Did we do alright?" He seemed to genuinely care. Now, I can tell you that this was a special thing. Then, I thought he did this with everyone.

"I thought so but I'm no critic."

He quickly shook his head refuting my comment. "Nah, nah. Matt's told me otherwise."

I snorted. An ugly snort. "Really?" I don't have the belief others talk about me when I'm not there. I'm some ghost in their mind.

"Yeah, yeah," he sounded like he was pacifying me. "He says you're a writer."

I shrugged. I didn't consider myself to be much of anything. "Just studying it. It's not like I've got anything published."

"Nah, nah." That was his most popular word. Some double-jointed phrase he said so much but had no clue that he did. "I don't believe all that. If you write then you're a writer."

"Everyone writes." I reasoned.

He didn't verbalize it this time. Just shook his head. "Not everyone."

"Are you a writer?" I was distancing myself without moving an inch. I looked away from him and went down to my cigarette. It seemed Alex had gotten a hold of me without ever holding a conversation with me before. I felt as though he must know all my deepest fears and insecurities like he was a psychic or something. That scared me more than anything. At the time, it was more violating to me than an unwanted grab on the ass.

He shrugged to answer me and returned to his smoke. I didn't let him off easily, I thought I had control now. "Would you say you're a musician just because you play music? Plenty of people do that."

I thought I would sway him off. Alex was a little lamb and I was about to bite his head off. Until, as always, he saw right through it. "You're trying to tease me, Jane, I can tell."

I scuffed and rolled my eyes. I stared at my shoes and in a nervous fit swung my left leg back and forth. "Deflecting."

"I suppose so," he conceded, "but so are you."

At that time I was a debater in all aspects of life. I liked the thrill of arguing. I suppose that's why I went back and forth between fucking and hating Will so much. Or I was just 17. They are much of the same.

"So," he interrupted the silence we were enduring together, "how was the show?"

I smiled softly. I wanted to be endearing to him. Fool him into thinking I was this sweet little girl and then trample him. "I'm very opinionated. You wouldn't want to know."

He chuckled and leaned away from me, up against the brick wall. Most guys I had known before—most 17-year-old guys I had known before—took my girlish smile and batting of my eyelashes as an invitation to try and mess about with me. Alex took it for what it was. A facade.

"I like the opinionated girls," Alex told me, "Means they have something going about in their head."

I gasped. "Most girls have a bunch more going about in their heads than boys."

He nodded. "I'm sure that's true." He took a puff and said, "Most people I can't see playing pinball with their own mind."

I crossed my arms and thought I was one-upping him when I said, "I'm more a solitaire kind of girl."

Alex chuckled, threw down his cigarette, and scuffed it out. "How lonely."

I was utterly exposed. In shock, I said, "What?" He shrugged, unsure of what to say. "I'm not lonely."

He shook his head. "I never said you were."

I rapidly nodded mine and needed to throw off any sign that he was right. That in some 5-minute chat outside a pub, he somehow knew everything about me. "Yes, you did."

"I just meant..." he trails, tossing around what to say in his own head. (Now I could realize he knew me so well because he knew his own mind so well.) "The mind is a lonely place to be."

I shook my head. I was sure of this. "You're just not being imaginative enough."

"I suppose not." He agreed. He stood up straight from the wall. Put one hand in his jeans pocket. Then, the other. "But I'm not a writer."

He headed off back into the pub and I stood outside thinking more than smoking my cigarette. I decided to myself I could think about what he said there in those minutes I had only outside and then I would never think about it again. I wouldn't lie awake that night and give thoughts to a boy who once vomited in the middle of a game of Spin the Bottle. One who spent most of our drunk nights, chatting about with one girl, and then not even going home with her. Then, I thought I must have been the girl tonight. I felt sorry for all the girls before that had to deal with him. I thought about yelling at him. Then, I thought about fucking him. Then, I just felt sorry for myself.

I didn't finish my cigarette and went back inside. I'm not sure what point I was trying to prove to Alex. I guess that I wasn't lonely, but, like everything, he was right about that too. Will grabbing my ass didn't disprove that.

I made eyes at him for most of the night. Challenging him. He was too busy talking to someone else. There always seemed to be someone else. Will was grabbing my ass and chatting a girl up at the same time. I began to question why I endured all this.

I excused myself to the bathroom but went to the bar where Alex was trying and failing to order a drink. "You have to be more assertive."

He smiled cheekily at me. I placed my back up against the bar and leaned my elbows on the edge. I was a character in a movie. A femme fatale. "I'm too quiet for that," Alex says.

I nodded. "You seem it."

"I guess I have that reputation." He acknowledged.

"Among other things." I was flirting but I couldn't tell if he was falling for it. He intrigued every corner of me. I couldn't tell if he was shy, not interested, or just oblivious.

He tried to flag down the bartender again. Failure. I faced the bar, lifted my hand, and received attention immediately. I experienced some perks as a woman. "What do you want?"

Alex didn't say anything for a moment. He laughed. He shook his head. "Whatever you've been having."

He made me laugh. "Two lime margaritas." I ordered and the bartender got to work.

"Is that a skill?" He asked me. "Like hailing a cab."

I shrugged. "I've never had to work at it. Some of us are naturally gifted, Turner."

He raised his eyebrows. "How'd you learn my last name?"

I smirked at him. "I don't have some glamorous spy story. Matt talks about you guys all the time. You've known each other for a long time."

"Yeah," he nods, "over a decade now."

"We're getting old now," I told him.

"I think you have some time until you have to worry about that, Jane." He said to me.

I disagreed. "You're old when you realize you're actually living a life."

"So, when you're 6?" He joked.

We both received our margaritas. I ran my fingertips around the rim of the glass. "Percisely, Turner."

"You're an awful cynic." He told me.

I returned to my old position of leaning on my elbows against the bar. Margarita in my left hand this time. I ignored his comment and said, "You fascinate me, Alexander."

He exhaled loudly. "I'm not very interesting."

I bite down on the lime I had been given. "That's exactly why."

Alex laughed. "You're not being very nice to me, Jane."

I giggled. "That's not what I meant. I like people who aren't full of themselves."

"Then, why do you hang out with Will so much?" He questioned.

I sighed, leaned my head back, and placed the back of my hand on my head in a form of dramatics. "I have no clue." It made him laugh and that made me laugh. When we both quieted down, I leaned closer to Alex. "But I'm here with you and Will is over there. You're very interesting, you just don't know it. I can't wait to see when you realize that."

"You sound like a psychic, Jane." He looked so dreamy there and for a moment I think I was looking into a crystal ball. Futures where we were side-by-side like this, smiling at one another, making eyes at one another, saying unwritten truths to each other in whispers. I felt he already knew all my secrets, he was letting me in on them and was interested in looking into my eyes with those chocolate pools of his. It was probably then that I knew I wanted to love him.

"I hope so." I smiled at him and he smiled at me and that was that. "You're very pretty, Turner. Has anyone ever told you that?"

He chuckled softly and boyishly. "My mum maybe."

I laughed too, soft, and boy, I could get used to this. I traced my own nose as I said, "You have this angle to your nose." I grinned wide and pearly, just admiring him. I pointed left and right to my eyes as I said, "Puppy dog eyes." He was a fan of that one, he smiled but tried to hide it. I pointed to the middle of my forehead as I said, "Strong widow's peak. Those are genetic, you know?"

"Yeah, we've got a couple of widow's peaks in my family." He told me.

"See." I kept my smile on. I pointed to my lips. "You always look like you're trying to find something to say. Rolling it back and forth and tasting it before you spit it out."

He smiled at me all lovely. "You've got a way with words, Jane. You should write that somewhere."

"Write about you?" I fanned disgusted. "Never."

I wrote about him in my diary that night. He became a main character in every story I told. He wormed his way like a true bookworm. He poked holes in all my stories and forced himself into them. I'm writing about him here.

Maybe he was the psychic.

*

In the nook of summer, I spent a month in the Bahamas with my family where the main food source was drinks and my father let me sit in on his poker games for the first time. When I returned, tanned and lush, in July, Joanie turned 18, the first of our group of friends. To my surprise, Joanie and Matt were still together. I never doubted the affection they had for each other but our group of friends went through relationships like my mother did with her liquor.

Two days after I'd returned to Wakefield, she threw a birthday party at Will's house because Will had the luxury of being an only child with parents who were always going on these couple retreats that we all thought were code for sex trips to Vietnam. 

In my typical fashion, I arrived an hour late with a dumb present and a dress that was too short. Mini-dresses were my religion at that age (maybe still are). I felt cute and exotic with a glowing complexion compared to the pale Brits. I had my hair in loose braids with bows tied to their ends and had stolen my mother's diamond earrings. I suffered from a deep superiority complexion and didn't care much that it was Joanie's birthday. I had turned it into my homecoming party.

"Janie Cavendish! Is that you?" Joanie exclaims too perky for my liking. Being called Janie made me want to barf. "We all thought your plane went down in the Pacific!"

"Atlantic," I corrected. Joanie likely eliminated some brain cells with the amount she had drunk before I'd arrived.

"Oh, oops! Come, come, sit!" She grabbed my hand and dragged me over to Will's mother's ugly Boca Do Lobo wrap-around couch likely already ruined by drink spills. I had noted the flimsiness Will cared for expensive things. For the first time, it revolted me.

The room was on fire with excitement, alcohol, drugs, and sex, but over on the filthy couch was just Rosie, who was nestled into Will, a development I wasn't aware of and hurt my heart more than I wanted to ever admit. AB appeared from out of thin air and yelled, "JC's here!" He then crashed into me with a hug and I never understood how he survived these parties sober but he refused a drink and offered you a ride home. He probably saved all of our lives.

On the other end of the couch's prongs was Paul, who I had definitely slept with and not remembered, and his girlfriend, Cecilia, who he had definitely been with when I had slept with. Not that I felt any guilty over it back then. My parents did it, why should it matter if I did it? It was Paul's problem, not mine.

Next to Cecilia was Jamie Cook doing something weird with his tongue, stretching his mouth with his dirty fingers, sticking his tongue out, and trying to touch his tongue to his nose. It both impressed me and disgusted me and if I had a drink I'd probably spit it out in laughter at the sight of it.

Matt was egging him on saying he was so close when his tongue was a mile away from his nose. Joanie left her place beside me and dove into Matt's arms, all drunk, flirty, and cutesy. She tapped his nose like he was her prized poodle.

Right at the end was Alex. Roughed up in some scruffy red tee and jeans that had a hole in it that his mum patched up and there was writing down the sides of them. He was talking to some girl and something bubbled in me that I couldn't explain away. I was offended his eyes didn't stare at me from the moment I walked in. To me, he was some lost pup who would follow me wherever I went. It wasn't true, I was the pup begging for attention. I found it ridiculous he wouldn't be all over me. I needed that to feel I had accomplished something. 

When AB left, I was on the other section of the couch, facing him, staring at him to convey some spell: look, look here, notice me, notice me! Alex only grew closer to the other girl and I must have missed something in the month I was gone. It felt like an atmosphere shift had occurred and I didn't feel pretty because Alex wasn't staring at me and Will was feeling up some other girl.

Drink.

It was the clearest solution for occupation purposes but Joanie's high-pitched voice irritated me and Rosie's tits nearly spilling out over Will made me feel the need to vomit. I ran into Claire, who hugged me, gave me her drink, and made me take Molly with her before leaving with her now-on-again boyfriend, Ollie. 

Claire's drink tasted like cherries and she could work as a bartender if I wasn't convinced she'd drink all the liquor at the bar. I poured vodka into the drink and returned to the couch where not much had changed except that someone else was sitting in my seat now.

"You're in my seat," I told the man. He was older, a few pounds overweight, and suffering from a massive neckbeard.

He scoffed, "It were empty when I got here."

I smiled and bowed my head, "Yeah, I went to get a drink but now I'm back."

He waved me off. "Ya got up."

"Yeah, I know, but I'm back now. Joanie's one of my best friends and it's her birthday party."

He laughed. "What are we at a 5-year-old's birthday party?"

I furrowed my brows. "What are you 40 hanging with teenagers?"

Rage covered his face and I'm certain his neckbeard moved like it itself was going to attack me. "Fuck off."

I grew pleasure inside me for the first time that night. If I couldn't make someone fall at my feet, at least I could knock someone down. "Give me my seat back. You could probably use the movement."

"Fuck. Off." He enunciated. 

"Give me my seat back."

"Fuck off!"

"Give me my seat back!"

"Fuck off!"

"Just give me the fucking seat back!"

"Fuck off!"

"Give me the fucking seat!"

"No, now fuck off!"

"No, give me the fucking seat!"

I didn't really even want the seat. I just got a kick out of the vein popping out of his forehead and the way a girl could make him sweat bullets of rage over the end piece of an offensive-looking couch.

But then he stood up, 6 feet 6 inches, and 15 stones of him towered over me. I felt small again like he was going to snap me in two. But my seat was empty! I twisted around him and sat down in my seat.

"Get up!" He yelled.

"No, fuck off!" I yelled back.

"Get the fuck up, bitch!"

I supposed we were both too focused on the other to notice that the party's population had turned toward our display. Everyone was either engaged or snickering at the display.

"It's my seat," I said calmly.

He didn't respond verbally, instead, he picked me up. I heard Joanie scream, "Matty, help her!"

I laughed. I didn't find the whole ordeal funny, I just wanted everyone else to feel I found it funny. My bones hurt, I was riddled with goosebumps and had my underwear exposed for everyone to see.

Joanie would later comfort me and tell me it wasn't a big deal because "everyone has seen you in your underwear already pretty much, I mean, you know, cuz you've slept with everyone." It didn't comfort me much to be called a slut in Joanie language.

Matt tried his best to rescue me but he was scrawny and this guy looked like Andre the Giant. Eventually, the commotion of the party and the embarrassment got to the guy and he dropped me to the floor where I fell onto my ass. My hair was falling out of my braids and my dress was twisted up. 

Matt helped me to my feet and to distract myself from the pain of falling straight onto my ass, I laughed into his shoulder. The ecstasy helped too.

"Are you okay?" He asked me.

Before I got an answer out Joanie rushed over and hugged me tight, highly increasing the already likely chance I'd be bruised tomorrow. "Oh, my god, Janie!" A shiver went down my spine at the word. "You're going to be okay. Get that guy out of my party!" She acted like she was the Queen of Hearts ordering for him to be executed. Andre the Giant had already left. I think she just wanted to feel like she helped in some way.

"Yeah." I felt like crying but I turned to where the crowd had gathered and curtsied to them. "That's all folks!"

Once people got the okay, they were quick to go back to their conversations, now discussing what had unfolded. Music played up again and the world kept spinning.

Alex sat alone in his place on the couch. No girl, no chatting, no smile. When I looked at him, he looked at me. It didn't make me feel any better. I had wished for it the whole night and I finally got it and it was a look of pity.

"Do you need anything?" Matt asked me.

I looked at him and shook my head. Joanie pulled him back to their reserved seat.

Alex stood up and walked to me and I felt nervous. If some psychoanalyzing was to begin, I think I'd cry in front of the whole party. He lightly grabbed my elbow. I looked into his eyes, deciphering slowly what he must think of me. I was scared of every move he'd make. I wanted him to like me. I wanted to be the cool girl. I didn't want to cry. I didn't want to cry. "Do you want to go for a smoke with me?"

One of his hands tugged on my heartstrings, the other pushed me through the crowd by the small of my back. It was the most forward he had ever been but any intentions he had were unknown to me. 

Outside, he placed distance between us. Away from the large portion of the masses, we walked side-by-side. I followed him. He led the way. The stragglers that messed about the lawn must have annoyed him as he walked until he was away from the whole scene. In other instances of my life, I'd think the guy wanted a moment alone with me for a snog or shag. I thought Alex didn't want to be seen with me.

"We can sit if you want." He was polite in his voice and he gestured slowly to the bench in the house's decadent garden.

I sat first on one side and he sat on the other. He pulled his pack out and tossed me the lighter. He stuck one in his mouth, then handed me the pack. I felt like one of the boys and it made me laugh for some reason. I plucked one out like a lady, like my mother would. I lit my cigarette and when I went to light his, he took it out of my hand and did it himself. I felt stiff and awkward and that I must have grown a seventh head when I was in The Bahamas.

"You went to The Bahamas. Joanie said." He was taking slow drags of his cigarette and I was taking slow drags of him.

"Yeah." Maybe I was being evasive for enigmatic purposes. Maybe I was uncomfortable. I can't quite remember.

"How was it?"

I thought about lying. But I didn't see the purpose anymore. "Boring."

He chuckled light-heartedly. Everything is light-hearted. "Why?"

"I just sat on the beach all day. Maybe if I went with friends." I shrugged and pulled my legs up behind me on the bench.

"I'd like to travel," Alex told me.

"Where?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. I'd like to do it more though. Like when I'm older, you know, that kind of thing."

I laid my head on my arms on the bench's backing. Ash collected on the end of my cigarette but I ignored it and looked at Alex. "We could go somewhere together."

"Really? Where do you wanna go?" His head was leaning against his hand. I felt we mirrored each other in some way that if I dug deeper then I would've known why.

"Away. Doesn't have to be far but I don't feel like myself here." I slipped. All those things I spent days pushing down, fell out mid-conversation with no remorse. I didn't care because I knew Alex wouldn't blab. He already knew everything about me. I wasn't revealing anything by saying this.

He didn't talk for a while. He sat with what I had said. Then he told me, "I don't think anyone feels like themselves at this age."

"Do you?"

He sat with that too. Then said, "I'm trying to."

I sat up straight. "I have an idea." Alex smiled at me and I felt wind sweep through me. "Why don't you act like your true self and I'll act like mine."

"I don't think I can do that."

He knocked something in me. "Why?"

He hid himself. He looked down at the slits in the bench. He bounced his foot. He tossed some idea in his head. Then, it spilled. "You make me nervous."

I was shocked by this. I found him intimidating. I got a boost in myself knowing he found me an equal representation. "Why's that?"

"I'm not good at telling people to fuck off."

I vowed, "I'll do it for you."

It wasn't a hit to him; a woman defending him. In fact, I think he got a kick out of it.

"Did you get into fights in The Bahamas?"

"Only with my family." 

"Do you get along?" He shifted forward like he had some actual interest in me. It was conflicting with every other interest I'd attracted from a man. It was a perked-up ear instead of a perked-up dick.

I shook my head. "No, not really. We kind of...I don't know. Things have never been great with my parents but getting older I've drifted more away. My siblings are a wild card."

"How many you have?"

"2 sisters, one older, one younger, and an older brother. I've never been close to the two older ones but Stacey, my younger sister's 11 so other than being annoying we get on well. You're an only child?"

His eyebrows raised, his eyes widened, and he looked as if I was some private detective. "You snoop me out, Jane?"

I took a drag of my cigarette and tried my best to look abject. "You act like an only child."

He looked affronted and on guard but had a toothy smile. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"All I'm saying is you never act like you had someone yelling over you at the dinner table. Only children fall into two categories: selfish or selfless. I'm assuming by your interest in me you must be pretty selfless."

Alex tilted his head from side to side. "I don't think so." 

I shook my head. 

"Eh! Why you doing that?" He chuckled.

I laughed at him. We were laughing together. "Take the compliment. My mother always says to say thank you for a compliment even if it's not true."

"Well, thank you and it's not true." 

Alex puffed away as I looked out into the garden. The gardener cut the bushes this morning and the flowers had reached their full bloom. I didn't move a muscle but I moved my eyes to look at him. He was small in both figure and persona. He didn't burst away. He sat quietly on the bench, smoked his cigarette, and looked at me. I was looking at flowers and he was looking at me. 

"I think it's true."

When our cigarettes had finished, we didn't go inside. Neither of us made a move and I decided that he must either like spending time with me or hate the party. We didn't talk after my comment and I didn't know what to say. I thought about teasing him. I thought about flirting with him. I thought about kissing him. 

Then, I decided to walk around the garden. He didn't move, he stayed nestled on the bench and watched me skim my hands along each petal. 

"They have tomatoes here!" I gasped.

Red, plump, and hanging heavily off the vine begging for plucking. Alex came up behind me looking at the lush beings. "I don't like tomatoes very much." He told me like it was some hushed secret, pinky promising not to tell a soul.

I gasped again. "How can you not love tomatoes?" I pulled one off the vine and took a bite of it. Nobody else seemed to be enjoying them due to the unruly way they grew and the surplus of numbers.

Alex, however, seemed to think I stole from a poor family living off the street, ignoring the mansion in the backdrop. "You eat it like an apple?"

I had tomato juice running down my cheeks and while I looked particularly gross, he didn't say anything. "I like them."

"You do indeed."

We walked around the garden, cluttered and looking like no one partook in its pleasures other than the man being paid to tidy it. The stone path led out of the garden into the large backyard, fit with trees and a birdbath. 

Alex walked with his hands in his pockets and I walked with mine holding each other behind my back, tomato in my left hand. "What have you done this summer?"

"Oh." He was shocked the conversation had turned to him. Do I really talk about myself that much? "Me and the band played around a little. Went to a few shows 'round here. Wasn't too big."

I almost didn't ask him but an unknown being tugged at me to ask, "Who was the girl you were talking to before? I recognized her." I had never seen that girl before in my life.

"Uh, Lauren? I went to Stocksbridge with her," Alex told me. "Joanie knew her somehow."

"Joanie knows everyone."

We were walking in circles now, rounding the house, but I didn't want to go back inside. I wanted our secret garden. "What'd you take from Claire?" He was watching me. He was watching me. He was watching me!

I giggled. "The Molly?" 

"You do that?"

I nodded.

"I've never done anything like that. You know, other than drinking."

We took a few more paces, rounding ourselves to the front of the house. "Do you want to?"

He shook his head. I felt embarrassed and ashamed like a mother had caught my nefarious habits. "You go clubbing a lot, right?"

I shrugged. I usually boasted about my nights out like it was a badge of honor for me. I felt he ripped the badge off. 

"Live music at those things?" Alex asked.

"Some," I answered.

"You think you'd be able to—I don't suppose you could. Maybe." He stuttered.

I giggled feeling at ease again. "Spit it out. I won't judge you. Well, unless you're about to bring up something gross."

Alex looked me in the eye as we stopped on the front lawn. He tapped his foot and dug his hands deeper into his pockets. "I thought maybe you'd be able to get us some gigs."

My lips slowly upturned. "I'd love that. I'll be your bookie."

He laughed. "Don't let power get to your head."

I tossed the tomato to the ground, citing that it was a gift to the rats that lived here and it would decompose just fine. I eyed the door but held no desire to reenter that world. I looked back at Alex, scuffing his trainer into the ground and swallowing whatever idea he wanted to say to me but didn't. I thought to ask but didn't.

"I think I'm gonna go home," I told him.

I got a borderline pathological level of joy when his face showed minor disappointment. He nodded and said, "Okay."

I wanted to prove him wrong. I didn't want to be the girl he talked to all night, and didn't take home, before chatting up some other girl. That's what I told myself but it probably wasn't the whole truth. Then, I realized, he was too nervous to ask me home with him. He was more occupied with his shoes and knew he'd have better luck dissecting my being than attempting to kiss me.  

So, I asked, "Do you want to come with me?" I didn't want to sleep with him, at least not explicitly. My intention was to, in some way, prove him wrong. In another way, the bigger consuming way, I wanted to talk to him more. "I don't live too far from here. We can walk. A girl really shouldn't walk alone at night."

Alex smiled suspiciously but nodded. "Shouldn't we say goodbye first?"

I furrowed my brows. "To a drunk Joanie who is probably too busy making out with Matt to care about either of us?"

He tilted his head. "Fair enough." He was a gentleman first and a teenage boy second.

"I got Joanie a shitty present anyway," I said as we began to walk away from the scene.

"I didn't even get her anything," Alex told me. "What you get her?"

"A snow globe from The Bahamas."

He burst out laughing, throwing his head back in express joy. He was contagious and I fell ill. "Does it even snow in The Bahamas?"

I shook my head through laughter. "I don't think so."

I don't know why he found it so funny that we had to stop walking. He was bent over laughing, holding his knees, and trying to catch his breath. I was laughing, more at him than the dumb snowglobe. I was infatuated. He was entrancing and I suffered from whatever his spell was. He stuffed himself into this laid-back body and busted through it with spoils of laughter. I thought about every joke I could make. I wanted to incite it more, force it out of him, have him tell me how funny I was. How I was the funniest girl he had ever met and he would like to stand by my side until my next joke. If that joke never came, he'd stay standing with me just in case it came.

Alex stood up slowly, exhaling loudly, collecting himself before we began our steps again. His face was red like I felt. On fire of sorts, lit ablaze by some force he beheld in no need of extinguishing. It was sudden and all at once, no stopping it.

When we reached my house, my father was out front in his car, which meant he and my mother were fighting. Often times my father would drive around but his car stayed parked and he was smoking a cigarette out the window. All the lights in the house were turned off, except the living room, which meant my mother was drinking.

My house wasn't unassuming by any means. It dwelled in comparison to Will's but I knew it loomed over most individuals. Sometimes, it loomed over me. 

As we headed up the front steps, my father yelled out to us, "Janie!" Everything was cold here. In this hot spell of summer, my skin turned goosey, and I prayed for a regular conversation with my father for Alex's sake. 

I turned and took two steps toward my father. Alex remained on the first step but watched us. My father gave us a look: a raised eyebrow, a tilted head, a shifting glance. A pit felt in my stomach and I thought he was going to send my Alex away. I had stolen him away from the party, from everyone, from Lauren, and he belonged to me unless my father smashed my plans all up. 

And then he yelled, "Tell your mother she's being a bitch!" 

A pit sank even further in me. My father never cared. I didn't utter a word and my father didn't wish me goodnight as he started the engine and Alex and I ducked into the house. Part of me wanted to do something nefarious with Alex to prove some point to my father. Another part thought I would be giving him too much.

Then Alex smiled at me and I didn't think my father's opinions and choices mattered much. It felt like my choice for something. Not something forced upon me or some vengeful decision.

I whispered to Alex to follow me up the stairs quickly as we dashed up. I didn't want to get hold of my mother who was clanking bottles around in the kitchen. I hoped Stacey was asleep through their whole fight. Likely, she had her ear on the door or worse was forced to witness and choose sides—something my mother made us do during fights. 

Alex and I ducked into my room. He seemed to get a kick out of it. "I feel like James Bond."

I rolled my eyes and flipped my light switch on. My room had acquired an extra messiness since I had yet to unpack from The Bahamas. I was too tired to care and Alex didn't mind. In fact, he seemed to get a kick out of it.

My walls were pink and covered with pictures from unknown drunken nights and childhood memories. Little trinkets I had collected over the years that no one knew the meaning of except me sat around across my room.

Alex picked up a plastic flower I had placed on my desk. He stayed taciturn.

"That's from my first boyfriend." I giggled. It seemed silly to talk about Tim. I felt dumb for keeping such a thing for so long but it was a sweet gesture and I took savouring to a near hurtful level.

He laughed too. "Oh." He put it down gently as if the fake petals would fall off any moment. "Holding on for safekeeping."

I folded my arms and leaned against my desk. "I hold on to everything. Too much."

Alex shook his head. "I don't think I do that enough. I wish I was more sentimental about things."

"Don't be. It's the worst fate you can have. You either become a hoarder or you become one of the people that think having something that reminds you of a person is an excuse not to talk to them."

Alex looked around on my shelves. Examining each item with detail. "Candy wrapper?"

"That's just trash."

We laughed and he moved onto the Madeline doll I had sitting on lopsided on my shelf. Likely last touched years ago. My mother had gotten the doll for me and I didn't want to talk about that. About how my mother or what used to be.

"Do you want to sit?" I gestured to my bed, a foot away from my desk.

He sat down and I didn't move. Our feet intersected but never touched. We were quiet and then Alex asked, "Did you write anything recently?"

I shielded myself and lied with a shake of my head. "I'm not a writer. I told you that."

He smirked. "I don't believe you. Come on." I shook my head and I watched as his eyes traced down to the open notebook on my desk. "What's that?"

"A book."

"What kind of book?"

"Notes from school."

"Why are you looking at notes from school over the summer?"

Before I had time to react, he launched himself toward the desk. I blocked the book with my body. He tried to swing around to try and grip it from the other side. I swayed my hips to prevent him. Soon it turned to a dance and soon Alex tried other efforts by tickling me. "Stop!" I squealed.

"Oh, come on, Jane!"

"No!"

"I'll show you mine if you show me yours." Such a typically salacious comment came off as charming and playful and my room filled with laughter. We reverberated through the house and sliced the silence. My house hadn't been that loud since Stacey was in the throes of the terrible twos. It was a delightful charm that a home should have.

I pushed his hands off of me. "Stop it. Stop it." I giggled uncontrollably. Alex laughed along and rested back on my bed. He leaned back onto his elbows. It oozed coolness and my body was burning alive from the inside out. 

"Eventually?"

"Eventually," I promised. I was too nervous to show anything to my peers. I took it deeply seriously and if somebody—somebody like Alex—told me it wasn't any good then everything would be for nothing. I would be a talentless loser and to show that to Alex, who viewed me in a revered spotlight, meant that I truly had no future. Nothing to escape Wakefield, my parents, or myself.

"What about your writing?" I asked him. I tempted fate and hopefully Alex by moving onto my bed. I lied on my stomach beside him, resting forward on my elbows.

"I don't know. I don't really think I'm any good." He gazed off, examining the room an inch at a time.

I was reminded of an off-handed comment. "Matt says you are."

"He's just being polite, you know." Alex played things off with ease. He never made a show of compliments, even truthful ones. I don't think he believed the good himself. He put on a show of things but never had a deep confidence. Everything was locked within himself too deep for even him to know it.

"I don't think so. He had nothing to gain by telling me," I said.

Alex faced me, eye to eye, closer than we'd ever been. "What did you think of them? Those ones at The Grapes."

He read me. The wheels turning in my mind trying to formulate a response. "Be honest, Jane," Alex urged.

I didn't want to discourage him. I liked some of it. They took you on a journey and fit the music. I sat up on my knees. "Well, they were good."

Alex threw his head back. "There no good, Jane, you can just say it, you know. Don't have to tiptoe 'round the whole thing."

I grabbed his hand, the one closest to me that was lying against my blanket. It was quick and unintentional, like some gut instinct. I held it tight. "No! I like them. You're a storyteller, Alex Turner."

"But?" He smiled at me, taking no offense to my critiques.

I bit my bottom lip to prevent my own wild grin. "But...they need some work. Which! Everything needs. Revising is key to any good written work." I jostled our shared hands unconsciously while speaking. Neither of us noticed. It was an attachment that made sense to be joined together.

"So what should I do? Employ the Hemingway method and write drunk, edit sober?" He joked.

I corrected him, "Hemingway never said that. That's from Reuben, Reuben. But that's beside the point." 

"Reuben, Reuben?" He questioned.

"Yeah, it's a Peter De Vries novel and movie with Tom Conti, but whatever—"

Alex cut me off, "What's it about?"

I scowled at him for interrupting me. "It's about this poet who has writer's block and drinks all day. It's pretty much about Dylan Thomas. Anyways—"

He ignored me again. "Is it any good?" He cocked a smile at me. He knew what he was doing getting me all riled up and irritated at the interruption. 

I pursed my lips at her and dropped his hand to shove him. "Shush!" Alex cackled, pleased by my annoyed attitude, and the way my nose puckered up. I watched as his hand slithered its way back to mine, grabbing hold of it. It was the first time I realized I had been holding his hand. I didn't say anything about it. Maybe he had done it unknowingly and I didn't want him to stop doing it. His palm was soft but held callouses on the edges and he fit just right.

"The whole 'writing drunk, editing sober' idea isn't actually bad," I told him.

Alex raised his eyebrows. "You want me to become Dylan Thomas?"

I giggled softly. "Not that exactly but why don't you go out and write about all the shite that happens 'round Sheffield. You know, like fools picking girls up in the air or Joanie's hideous spray tan."

He chuckled. "I mean, I've kind of done that. Ravey Ravey Ravey Club might be shite—"

I insisted. "I never said that!"

Alex eyed me suspiciously. "It might be shite but isn't that what it's about?"

"It's a try-hard song. You're an observer. I know you're not just sitting in the corner daydreaming. You watch."

A shit-eating grin spread across his face. I thought he had been struck with inspiration. That I'd given him a brilliant idea. One that would launch a thousand ships. Instead, he said, "You watching me, Janie?"

"Ugh!" I groaned. He erupted into laughter. He dropped my hand and fell onto my back beside him.

"Don't be embarrassed. Most writers are observers." I gave him a look translating to knock it off. "What do you see?" Alex asked me.

I tap my chin like I have to think about it. "You're shy and you sit in the corner most nights unless Matt or one of the guys is with you, then you stand next to them like you're their teddy bear or something." His laugh makes me laugh. "If you're in the corner, you're usually with a girl who you'll talk with all night but never kiss or leave with. It's very bizarre."

"Maybe I'm looking to take home the girl who is doing the robot—hey!" I punch his arm and he clutches it in exaggerated pain.

"You're a little too observant," I noted.

Alex explained, "You're very entertaining to watch."

"You make it sound like I'm a stripper."

I turned my head and his head was turned to look at mine. Inches apart, perfectly aligned, his eyes dashed across every inch of my face, while mine never strayed from his eyes. 

"If you want to kiss me, you can," I whispered to him. 

I wanted to kiss him but I wanted him to do it first. I wanted to take my time, not jump him. I wanted to handle him with care because I knew he would be with me and I'd never experienced that before. I only experienced rough and snapping touches. Alex would caress me and take me with ease. He would look for my permission at every step of the way. He would push my hair behind my ear and hold my head so delicately in his hands. He would kiss me slowly and tenderly. His hand would gradually rub my thigh before I told him to take my dress off. I could imagine his eyes widening at my boobs, braless and perky. I would shred my underwear because he'd be too nervous while he would take his shirt off. I wouldn't be rushed, it would be thought-out and delicate. For the first time in my life, it would be me who was cared for. He would tend to me, ask me what I wanted, and then do it. Do it perfectly. I would offer to do the same to him and he'd shake his head and say some other time. He would lie over me but it would be me in control. I'd call the shots and he'd accept them, he'd want to do them. He'd be slow until I told him to pick up the pace. We would end together and then he'd hold me. He'd hold me. In a loose manner that didn't strangle me. I would smile over at him and he would smile over at me. It would be the best thing I'd ever experienced.

"I don't want to do that with you, Jane." I hated him. He wrecked all my dreams and I realized he must be just as bad as every other guy. Will might have grabbed my ass too many times and collapsed over me dripping sweat before I even got started but Alex emotionally assaulted me. I never expected Will to care about me but Alex sat here and acted like he did. He got off on this. Getting girls' hopes up. I wonder if Lauren thought he was going home with her tonight. If she had planned an evening of fun after he laughed at her jokes and told her she was talented. He made me feel special but I was only a special dumb girl who revealed myself to him in vulnerable ways. He must laugh at this at home and cum in his pants at the thought of me crying when he leaves. It would be the worst thing I'd ever experienced.

I sat up quickly. I didn't look at him. My heart felt heavy and my eyes begged for me to let them blink but crying in front of him would be worse and giving him some sort of power. 

I heard Alex rustle behind me. I thought he was about to touch my shoulder, pretend to comfort me, and say he had to leave. I snapped around to look at him, propped up on his elbows again, looking confused. He should be some actor, not a damn singer.

"Are you gay?" I asked. I knew he wasn't. I wanted to shame him in some way. Like he wasn't some suave guy. He was some repressed homosexual.

He let out a snort. "What?" He played clueless perfectly.

It wasn't some playful anger I felt now. It was rage. Rage at him and the games men play and whatever this stupid act was. I thought about yelling at him but I think he wanted me to do that. I felt he loved that kind of thing. Extra ammo. 

I turned back around and the room fell silent. It was everything else that happened in this haunted house. It sucked every drop of joy out of everything.

"I shouldn't get involved with my bookie, you know." Alex laughed awkwardly. The way it came out, forced and choppy, cracked away at something in me. That hidden crevice in me that not everyone was out to get me.

"Yeah." I sighed and mustered something up in me to look at him. "Do I get paid for this bookie thing?"

"Well, I mean, the band isn't exactly making much money. Not really any."

"You can pay me in drinks." 

He grinned. "Sure."

I stuck my hand out for him to shake, completing the interview process. I sniffled and it was the worst thing I could have done because Alex's face flashed pain at the realization that I was hurt by him. I could've taken it as him not having ulterior motives but I chose not to. 

He shook my hand and I walked him out. I gave him my number and he gave me his but everything was done under the guise of business. I told him to get home okay but I didn't watch him walk away. I just went back inside and went to sleep.

*

A week and a half later, Alex and I set out to get the band gigs. I invited Claire to come with us, too terrified to be alone with Alex since my self-inflicted embarrassment. My reasoning��which was in part valid—being that Claire knew Sheffield way better than I did. Alex had a set of knowledge and a list of places he thought of, but he had the voice of a mouse and no boobs. 

Claire and I walked hip-to-hip, arms hugged around each other, and Alex trailed beside us. He was an excluded child not allowed in our sandbox. I felt awkward. Alex looked awkward. Claire didn't really give a shit. She's just had to pee.

"Ooh!" Claire cheered. "Let's stop in The Boardwalk. I can pee and then we'll ask them for a gig or whatever. I know that bar guy. Joshua. Jane knows who I'm talking about." She was talking a mile a minute and definitely on something.

The moment we stepped foot in the bar, Claire ditched for the bathroom. Alex and I were left alone. I hated myself for making it awkward, a thing I seem to still have a commitment to doing.

"Do you want to sit?" Alex offered a barstool.

We sat beside one another and I placed my bag on the one beside me to save for Claire. I couldn't think of a single thing to say to him. It felt more practical to sit in silence. Take in the ambiance of the bar. Everything felt caught in my throat, or rather, caught in my head as I couldn't think of a single thing. I resigned to not make eye contact with him. He resigned to do the exact opposite.

"Why'd you bring Claire?" Alex asked me.

"She knows Sheffield better."

He scoffed. "I know Sheffield. I didn't ask Claire. I asked you."

"I'm still here." That's not what he meant and I knew it but denial is the key genetic trait subjected to every Cavendish. 

My eyes looked down at the floor. It felt uneasy and ill-fitting but, to me, it was better than looking at his eyes. Alex tilted his head down, trying to look at me. "Is this summat to do with the kiss thing?"

I answered with a "very" convincing performance of "I don't give a shit" by saying, "Pft, no way. Don't flatter yourself." It was mean and said with bitterness but I was too down on myself to be nice.

When I looked at him, his eyes were cold and uninviting, he turned away and looked at Claire as she came skipping back over. My insides twisted in on themselves at the way he smiled at her and it felt ruthless. I reminded myself that he turned me down so if he went for some other girl, I never stood much of a chance. But if he went out with Claire I'd probably kill myself.

"Right, shall we give it a try?" Claire asked us. We both silently nodded. Claire stuck her hand in between Alex and me and tapped insistently on the bar. "Excuse me!"

A man came over, dragging his feet, and it felt obvious that we were a bunch of underaged kids. But he responded, "Yes?"

"Is Joshua here?" Claire asked.

The man began to snicker. "Joshua got canned because he was giving liquor to a bunch of underage girls."

Claire's smile dropped. She attempted to recover steadily but her reaction told her story for her, despite what she proceeded to lie about. "That's unfortunate." She sounded just like her mother. "Well, we'd like to speak to someone about getting a gig here."

The man shook his head. "No can do if you're minors, I'd like to keep my job."

Claire giggled. "I'm smitten"—Alex and I both shared a look with one another and chuckled at the word usage, softening our cold war—"that you'd think I was so young. You're very kind."

"Nice try. I let you use the bathroom but you're not getting much further." 

Claire rolled her eyes. "It's just a gig."

The man fought back. "I've got nappies to buy. Shoo."

"Don't shoo me!" Claire was growing feisty and that meant a business that no one wanted to witness. She was pounding and loud and usually not forgiven.

I grabbed a hold of her arm and dragged her back. "We'll leave," I told the man.

When we exited, The Boardwalk, Claire sighed loudly. "Sorry. That fucking idiot Joshua probably fed some 12-year-old. I've had no issues before!"

I laughed at her dramatics. "It's fine, Claire."

She sighed again. "I hate to leave you guys but Reg called while I was in the bathroom and I forgot I had a shift at work."

I panicked. "So, you have to leave?" My eyes were wide and I was not winning any awards for my acting. I was rigid and displayed raised eyebrows.

Claire frowned. "Sorry and since I'm not getting paid for this I can't quit my day job. I'll call you tomorrow, J." She hugged me tight and waved at Alex. "See ya, Al."

Alex waved back and Claire dashed down Bank Street. We were left alone and I debated turning away from him but I had agreed to give him a ride home. "Sorry," I mumbled to him.

He shrugged. "I assume we're done then."

I digested a pit into my stomach and there wasn't much I could do. I didn't want to hang around him but I felt I let him down more by coming up empty-handed. I nodded and he set off toward the car.

I walked three steps behind him. I didn't bother to catch up. There wasn't much point since I didn't know what to say to him. He didn't turn back to check if I was still behind him. The clicking of my shoes was enough of any indicator. 

About a block away, he stopped. I slowed my walking until I was beside him. "What's wrong?" I asked. He was frozen, with no motion, and I worried for him.

Alex hesitantly turned his head to look at me. "You are a terrible bookie." I laughed and then kept walking.

He cracked through our tension and left me standing on the corner of Queen Street. I chased him down while wracked with giggles. When I caught up to him, I told him, "A bookie is someone who takes bets for sports. I think you wanted a booker and I got confused."

Alex grinned and reached the passenger side. We got on much better on the way back to his house than on the ride down the City Centre.

When we reached his house, I apologized for the bad job I'd done. He shook his head. "It's fine. We probably need more time to practice anyway."

"I'll get you a gig. I swear. I'd never pass up free drinks."

Alex laughed and thanked me anyway. He waved goodbye to me as he unlocked his front door. I pulled away about 5 minutes into my drive I realized I had gone the wrong way. I was headed south toward the City Centre. I decided my misdirection was giving me a sign and I drove back to The Boardwalk.

I snuck in and the same man was at the bar. Trying my luck and hoping he didn't notice me behind Claire, I approached him. "Is there someone I can talk to about booking a gig?"

His eyes peered up and his look wasn't welcoming. "Determined."

I smiled because charm was going to be the only way this worked out. "I've got a job."

He raised his eyebrow. "This band has minors. I don't think the boss is gonna like that."

"What if I could promise you a crowd?" I asked him.

"A crowd of minors?"

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "No." There totally would be but ask for forgiveness, not permission. "A promise of a crowd of legal paying customers and that no minors will be drinking. Swear."

He hesitated. His eyes moved up and down my body, before he said, "I'll ask."

I smiled pleased but demanded, "Now." I was rarely authoritative, especially around strangers, but I felt that I had to do this. I couldn't imagine disappointing Alex. I had a job to do.

He smirked. "Fine. If you'll come out with me tomorrow."

It was probably some form of prostitution but I didn't care much about my body. It was a tool for me and if I had to use it to get ahead in this, then so be it. I had little regard for myself. I convinced myself that I somehow had the power in these situations.

Later that night, I knocked on Alex's house. When his mother answered, I felt nervous like meeting my boyfriend's mother for the first time. She smiled and when I asked for Alex she called out for him with the promise there was a pretty girl at the door for him.

He came to the door the same as I dropped him off. His eyebrows furrowed. "You okay? Your car okay?"

I couldn't hide the grin on my face. It was unstoppable, wide, cheek-aching. I almost jumped up and down in front of him. "You have a gig at The Boardwalk on August 14."

Frank and I went out the following night. It was nice enough for us to start dating in a sloppy manner. I got free drinks, too, even if I was still 17.

*

On the night of August 14, I sat at the bar while Frank tended it. With the promise of action at the night's end, he fed me as many drinks as I ordered, no payment required. Besides the blowjobs, I suppose. My opinion on the Monkeys didn't shift much when they took to the stage. Their setlist was similar to their night at The Grapes, besides a new cover. 

My job as booker was done and I was more focused on my glass and Frank's hands. Joanie was attentive enough for both of us. She stood at the stage's edge and jumped around. I upheld my promise of a crowd, even if most of them weren't focused much on the music and definitely not minors. 

When their set had come to an end, they came around to the bar about 20 minutes later. Still sweaty and hair hand-run-through. Matt was the first one to appear, saying, "I knew we could trust J.R. Cavendish."

I scrunched up my brows. "How do you know about my middle name?"

"How you think?" His head gestured to Joanie, still dancing around. "I think we should keep you on."

Frank came behind me. He was no longer behind the bar and his arms around me made me jump. "Well, I certainly had fun, but that was more from Jane though you lads."

My body was rigid. I wasn't a fan of this affectionate public display. I wasn't a fan of doing it in front of any of the Monkeys, but Alex's eyes darting around in confusion made me feel even more stiff in both body and mind. 

I tapped Frank's arm. His hold only tightened. "You can thank Frank for the gig," I told them.

"Oh, Joanie told me 'bout this. New boyfriend," Matt teased me. Alex had snapped over to Matt and the instant pleasure—the endorphins that flooded my system—was the biggest high I had ever experienced.

Frank relinquished his hold on me and took two steps back. "Well, I don't know anything about that." He snickered and my high crashed. "Don't get any ideas, Jane."

I didn't care for Frank ever. I was never in love with him. I, like him, was just getting my fill of things. But the way he snickered, it wrapped around me and constricted me. I was numb to this. I had been numb to this for so long. Even if I was mad at Alex, or embarrassed, he never made me feel insignificant. I felt interesting and important, even if he confused me more than anything I'd ever encountered. 

The Franks and the Wills of the world had tortured me for extensive periods that didn't feel significant. It didn't feel significant when the first one of them treated me this way because I was my mother. Simple as that.

It felt significant to share a thought and that thought be appreciated.

"Don't worry, I don't like slumming," I told Frank. I grabbed my purse and left, too drunk to drive, too early to go home, too filled with remorse and anger to ask for help.

I walked two blocks, no tears because Frank didn't deserve tears, I deserve tears. I deserved a weeping apology from every fucking loser guy who had come near me. I didn't know what to do with the hole growing in my stomach. The black hole that was coming for my heart. I was once a sensitive child. I'm a sentimental being. So, why did every relationship mean nothing? Why was I hoarding fake roses from Tim Hoardecker for nearly a decade but never cared for real flowers from all those stupid boyfriends? How much of a loser was I that my best relationship was one that lasted a week at summer camp when I was 10?

*

School began and I shielded myself from much of my former world. I hadn't heard from Joanie since The Boardwalk. I didn't care much. Rosie was with Will and Joanie was with Matt, secluded away, so I ate lunch with Claire and AB. They were the sanest anyway. I had known Claire since primary school, much like Joanie, but we'd never been close like Joanie and I were. Claire and I only grew in our bond in college while Joanie's and I's bond diminished.

Claire was the closest thing to a model I had ever witnessed with my own eyes, despite what my mother insisted about her past lives as an "actress," "model," and beauty queen (the only one that had been confirmed due to the tiara she displayed on the mantle). She was kissed by the Sun, blonde, and what I imagine every Viking in the village fought over for a chance to look at her.

AB was brunette and always looked like he had been in a fight, even though he couldn't kill a fly. He was the sweetest guy I'd ever known and girls prayed at night that they could marry him. I hoped, after all the jerks I'd end up with a guy like AB. I never attempted anything with AB because I was an immature rascal who was at least smart enough to not ruin a guy like that.

I heard through AB that the Monkeys had a concert at The Pheasant. None of us went. Sheffield was too far for any of us to drive and AB was sick of hanging out with a bunch of drunks. Claire and I had a sleepover instead, which I can confirm was much better because her mom's cooking is made by angels.

But after intentionally avoiding Alex for a month, I ran into him on campus grounds one day. On a walk between class and the parking lot, he snuck up behind me in a way usually reserved for kidnappers and murderers. "Hey, Jane C."

I, obviously terrified, shrieked and nearly tripped over my feet over each other. He rested his hands on my shoulders to steady me. I hit him with my textbook, a brick and loaded nonsense. "Alex Turner, you don't sneak up on women."

I kept walking and he kept in step with me. "I haven't seen you in a while. You quittin' on me?" Something had changed about him. His appearance was much of the same, except he was bundled up in a cheap tracky jacket. We contrasted each other in too many ways, I thought. I was a snob but not in an extreme fashion. The only thing I turned my nose up at was clothes. My coat was wool and lined with buttons. I hadn't worn a jacket with a zipper on it since the one week my mum allowed me to play football. I was charmed by it. It wasn't in some rich girl pity kind of way. Plenty of rich losers wore tracksuits, including my mother, but they weren't as cute as a button in them. 

"I wasn't aware I was still on retainer. Not like you need my help much anyway. I heard about The Pheasant gig."

Alex chuckled. "Yeah, that nobody came to. We played The Boardwalk again too. Not so much fun when there's nobody there."

"Well, I'm sure your luck will change." We'd reached my car and I wasn't trying to force him away but I was eager to get home and the wind chill was some of the harshest I've experienced.

"I wanted to talk to you about that." I had to resist an eye roll because I was making it a goal of mine not to be off-putting to people when they were being nice. It was going okay.

I looked up at him. He was on the opposite side of the car. Almost like he knew I was going to invite him into my car. I raised an eyebrow, silently urging him to explain. Instead, he slid a notebook across the roof of my car. 

I grabbed it before it flew to the ground. He had bookmarked a page. "Don't be snoopy and read other shite that's in there."

I furrowed my brows, looking at the scratches across the page. I was unsure what to make of it. The writings looked more like his notes for psychology than "It's a song," as he said.

I held my thumb down on the page and squinted as the wind rattled the pages. It became impossible to read and I looked up at the anxiety written on his face. I was pretty good at reading him too. 

We escaped the wind in my car and I was finally able to read through it. I dissected it in an eager manner. Noting the way it flowed and how vulnerable Alex had been to show it to me. His leg bounced, he tapped his fingers on his thigh and refused to make eye contact with me.

"Bigger Boys and Stolen Sweethearts," I read aloud. I looked up at him. His body leaning away from me, his head resting on his left hand balanced on the door. His hand framed around his face, covering his chin and cheek, shielding himself, as best he could. 

"Who's it about?" I asked. Please be me. He's a boy and he takes time to get it right but he's got it right and this song is an offering that he wants me back. It wasn't the most flattering song for a girl. He says the girl is "pretty fucking far from nice" and I was still young enough to not take offense to those kinds of things.

"How do you know it's about someone?" He questioned.

I shrugged like his lyrics didn't read as some obvious figure, even if he was talking in the 3rd person.

"That Lauren I ran into at Joan's party." Now 17-year-old me, felt this was an attack. Like Lauren was out to get me. A Lauren that I'd never met and would never meet. She was the obstacle preventing me from being the subject of the song. "I'd written this one a while ago. The advice you gave me, I went back and combed through some old ones lying about."

I pushed my anger to the back of my mind. I focused too much on what I didn't have in those days. Not the fact that Alex wrote something and thought of showing it to me first. I was the first second pair of eyes. I couldn't appreciate things, no matter how much I should've and wished I had.

My silence was irking him. He leaned over the console. Alex tried to decipher what part I was reading. My eyes darted across the small page too much for him to figure out. "What'd you think?"

Alex has never been good at believing in anyone's joy. You'd have to wrangle pride out of him and he'd doubt your belief in him no matter to constant reassurance. For the majority of people, it could be misconstrued as fishing for compliments or would become rapidly annoying. I never minded because I have always been the same way. It was a shared vulnerability. 

"I like it," I earnestly told him.

He shook his head. "You don't have to placate me, Jane." For Christ's sake, he was a teenage boy who used the word placate, I don't know why he thought he was some idiot. 

"I honestly do. I only have a few notes but they're small and you must think it's good too or you wouldn't show me."

Alex slowly smiled and then laughed. He was pleased with himself. It was his version of puffing his chest out. "Maybe."

"I think so and I have great taste. Well, in some things," I corrected myself. "Why don't you write it in first person?" I suggested.

"I like it in third," Alex said.

"You like hiding behind a character."

He gave me a pointed look. I had caught him in the act. I had given him the Alex treatment. It wasn't intentional. It was an easy thing for me to discern and I wasn't judging him. After months of languishing over it, I realized that if Alex did this to me, then it must have been instinct, not judgment. 

I told him, "We all do. Don't worry. That's what being a writer is."

"What would you know about being a writer, Jane?" Alex was teasing and flirtatious. He could switch between innocence and naughty ways in a quick compelling method that only made him increasingly attractive.

I bit my bottom lip to prevent the upturn of my lips and if I wasn't scared of being turned away again, I think I would've kissed him. "I have some experience." I had yet to admit it to myself before I told Alex about it. It seemed fitting that he would be the first to know before I even knew.

He grinned and I figured Alex only felt pride in two ways, a hidden, buried-in-his-ribcage pride and proving-me-wrong pride, which usually ended up meaning pride in me.

*

a/n: so...this is the first part...i hope you like it...more to come whether you like it or not because i'm already too invested in this. okay, thanks for reading!

[yoongsisbae]

Bon Voyage: Into the Sea - Chapter 6

A storm capsized your boat and looks like you were the only survivor. Somehow you made it to shore, but where? Stranded, you suddenly find out you are not alone, and now you’re stuck in the middle of a centuries old conflict between 7 monsters.

BTS fantasy AU. OT7 x reader. werewolf!Namjoon x werewolf!Hoseok x werewolf!Jungkook x siren!Yoongi x vampire!Jimin x vampire!Jin x whatis?Taehyung.

If you enjoy this series and want more updates, please leave a comment or reblog!

Warnings: smutty content, mind control, blood-drinking cause vampire things, dubconish, light yandere, voyeur, lots of neck licking lol

Word count: 12.1k

---

“You are going to be the reason we all die.”

“Jimin, stop,” Jin says. “Dove, we need to know what Taehyung said to you,” he asks, much more diplomatically. 

You shake your head, trying to make your way closer to the vampires, but the men around you have made an impressive barrier. How are you going to explain the lost months you experienced, the things you witnessed in Jimin’s memory? You stare at the angry younger vampire, how are you going to convince Jimin to help you?

“Jimin, you need to bite me.”

“What?!”

-

“What did you do to her?!” Hoseok roars at the vampire in question, who looks equally as shocked and offended at the accusation. 

“Nothing!” you interject, but your words fall on deaf ears.

“He did something to her to make her act like this!” Hoseok yells louder, turning his frustrations onto his pack leader.

“She has been calling out to him since we found her,” Yoongi tells Namjoon, confirming Hoseok’s accusations.

“What?! What did you do!” Jungkook growls out. “I’ll kill you-”

“It’s my fault that she's obsessed with me?” Jimin crosses his arms, looking away like the entire display was beneath him.

“Do you want to stop Taehyung or not?!”

The men exchange looks. “We need a plan, a real one,” Yoongi says, dismissing you. “The longer we wait-”

“Yoongi, do you have anything left that might be powerful enough?” Namjoon asks.

“I can look,” he says, “don’t hold out hope now that his binds are off.”

“And how the hell did they break?!” Hoseok yells accusingly.

“Don’t look at me!” the merman counters, “There should have been no fucking conceivable way to break those spells,” he glances towards the youngest vampire who furiously glares back.

“Well it happened, okay, and now is not the time to argue about it, we need to work together to stop him, there is no telling what he is capable of now.”

“Hello!? I have a way to stop him!”

“What is it, Dove?”

“I told you! Jimin needs to bi-”

“No! No way in hell.”

“Oh I am going to kill you!”

“KILL ME?! I’LL KILL YOU.”

“Everyone, silence!” Namjoon bellows and a tense silence settles in the air.

You speak up first, desperate to make them understand you. “Jin, why exactly did you forbid Jimin to bite me in the first place? Huh? Why?!” you challenge him.

Everyone stares at the eldest, even the vampire in question himself. Seokjin’s finger runs over his forehead, moving a stray lock of hair back in place. He clears his throat, “I did not want to cause him any pain-”

“What do you mean pain?” Jimin asks, repulsed. “She can’t hurt me!”

You huff, “Your memories, Jimin, your life-”

“There are certain memories better forgotten,” Seokjin interjects.

“No, no,” you say shakily. You had wished to forget this place so many times locked up in the vampire’s lair, and then when you did, you lost more than just the memories, you lost yourself. “No.”

And Jimin, he too, is lost. 

You glance over to the defiant vampire. “You have to bite me, you’re the only one who can stop Taehyung!”

Jimin looks around at everyone’s concerned faces, growing more irritated. Why does he have to be the one to stop Taehyung? Jimin never agreed to even help! And what makes you even think he has that kind of power? 

“Why?” It was Hoseok who questioned you angrily, upset at the way you are treating Jimin with such fondness. “Why him?!”

“Because he knows magic,” you say simply, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

“I d-don’t know magic,” he spits out. You couldn’t be any more wrong, Jimin thinks, who the fuck do you think you are, acting like you know so much about him, better than himself!

But everyone is silent, eyes full of guilt and remorse, looking at him as if they know something he doesn’t. The kind of look that Jimin despises.

“You do,” you say with more conviction. “When you were human. I can show you.” You hold out your arm to him as the pack tries still to barricade your body away from the vampires.

“What is she talking about, Jin?” he turns to the eldest. 

“Jin, we don’t have time, you need to be honest with him!”

“Shut up! You are the reason we are even in this mess to begin with, you know that? Just how many times did we tell you to not get so comfy with Taehyung. You let him use you, because you’re weak, you’re-”

“And what about you?! You let Taehyung use you too, didn’t you?!” you scream, your anger getting the better of you.

“Stop!” Namjoon bellows, “Everyone, stop!” He looks furious with you, his hard glare instantly making you feel small and apologetic.

“Don’t order me around, you filthy beast!” Jimin hisses at Namjoon, deep and threatening, his eyes glowing with rage.

“We don't have time,” you whimper desperately. 

Your head is pounding. You feel it…

…inside of you, in the back of your mind…screaming, wrapping around your bones…

…the dread of something horrible coming for you all.

Jimin can’t believe he’s stuck here until sunset! Inside this idiot infested house with the biggest of the idiots telling him the most ridiculous things he’s ever heard. It’s insufferable, you’re insufferable, the way you stare at him now. Whatever spell Taehyung inflicted on you has only changed you for the worse.

“Jimin, I’m afraid we need to work together on this.” The younger vampire yanks himself away from Jin’s comforting hand. He’s beginning to think Seokjin is equally to blame as much as you. He’s beginning not to trust him…

“I’m not fucking helping any of you,” he stares at you, glowering. “Let Taehyung tear you apart,” he growls, baring his fangs.

You shake your head in disbelief. “You wanted to be a doctor, you loved helping people, you became a medic in the military. You fought for your country, you saved people,” you ramble on and on, hoping to convince the vampire to listen to reason. You’re angry that no one has told him, they should have, this shouldn’t be coming from you!

Jimin yells, picks up and throws a wicker chair in your direction in his anger, which Jungkook stops with ease, the chair exploding when it hits the youngest’s shoulder.

Hoseok has had just about enough of Jimin, he hasn’t forgotten the scars he witnessed across your body, he hasn’t forgotten the way you looked so fragile when he found you. This was all the vampires’ fault, and Jimin most of all. That arrogant, cruel, deceptive little-

Hoseok transforms instantly, pouncing on Jimin.

Yoongi pulls you back as the others transform as well. You’re both thrown to the ground as they fight, as they tear the house apart from the inside, unable to cohabitate any longer.

You groan, rolling over, still attempting to get to the headstrong vampire, your hand pressing into broken glass and blood escaping.

At the smell it wasn’t Jimin, but Jin who lost control. So many days drinking from you, addicted in more ways than one. His eyes glow red, searching out your blood. 

Namjoon’s large snout sinks its teeth into the eldest vampire and the fighting only escalates tenfold. Everything is loud, everything is chaos. You try to keep moving closer to the chaos still, until you notice something familiar in front of you. 

You notice the redness of the gem that had fallen out of Yoongi’s pack in the chaos, now shining brighter than ever.

Oh no. You can feel it again, pulling you in. You shuffle backwards, clutching your chest, closing your eyes tightly as the gem burns brighter, glowing like the vampires’ eyes then glowing even more until it envelops the entire home.

-

“Do you all want to stop Taehyung or not?!”

The men exchange looks. “We need a plan, a real one,” Yoongi says, dismissing you. “The longer we wait-”

“Yoongi, do you have anything left that might be powerful enough?” Namjoon asks.

“I can look,” he says, “don’t hold out hope now that his binds are off.”

“And how the hell did they break?!” Hoseok yells accusingly.

“Don’t look at me!” the merman counters, “There should have been no fucking conceivable way to break those spells,” he glances towards the youngest vampire who glares back.

“Well it happened, okay, and now is not the time to argue about it, we need to work together to stop him, there is no telling what he is capable of now.”

“Hello!? I have a way to stop him!”

“What is it, Dove?”

“I told you! Jimin needs to bi-”

“No! No way in hell.”

“Oh I am going to kill you!”

“KILL ME?! I’LL KILL YOU.”

“Everyone, silence!” Namjoon bellows and a tense silence settles in the air.

This is getting you nowhere. Good God, how are you supposed to make six stubborn beings listen to you?! Think, y/n. Think! You try to come up with a plan, but your head is throbbing in pain.

Jimin speaks up first, “Just what are you playing at, pet?”

You look up at him. “Pull my memories. You’ve already done it once. Just do it again.”

Seokjin looks over at the younger vampire in disbelief.

“I have not,” Jimin looks at you furiously for getting him in trouble over a lie. “She’s obviously suffering from some delusional episode! Listen, you wretched human girl! You’re nothing to me, you mean nothing, so stop these fantasies! right! now!”

“You have, and we saw your mother. You just, ugh, don’t remember because it happened in the future, ugh, just-” you groan, clutching your head. It’s pounding more than ever, and you feel it, inside of you, in the back of your mind screaming, wrapping around your bones, the dread of something horrible coming for you all. Your body starts shaking and Jungkook wraps his arms around your waist to steady you.

Jimin can’t believe he’s stuck here until sunset! Inside this idiot infested house with the biggest of the idiots telling him the most ridiculous things he’s ever heard. His mother? You saw his mother? How dare you even talk about her! Like you know anything about her, like you know more than Jimin, who well, knows nothing about his mother…and he doesn’t care to know! 

Who the fuck do you think you are, acting like you know so much about him, better than himself! It’s insufferable, you’re insufferable. Whatever spell that Taehyung inflicted on you has only changed you for the worse. “See! She’s lost it,” he yells, pointing at you. “So weak!”

“Please, I’m not lying,” you cry out. You feel sick. You just want to save them, why won’t they listen to you?! Jungkook holds you tighter as your legs give out.

“What’s happening to her!” Hoseok looks over to his leader worriedly, holding onto your shoulders to keep you upright as you slump forward.

“I think it has something to do with this,” Yoongi pulls the red amulet from his pouch, holding the necklace up and letting it dangle for everyone to see.

“No!” You can’t stop it, it’s already starting again, the red glow emanating directly from the gem, covering everyone and everything in that same red hue, until that’s all you can see.

You clutch your chest, closing your eyes tightly as it burns brighter, until it envelops the entire home. 

-

“Yoongi, do you have anything left that might be powerful enough?” Namjoon asks.

“I can look,” he says, “don’t hold out hope now that his binds are off.”

“And how the hell did they break?!” Hoseok yells accusingly.

“Don’t look at me!” the merman counters, “There should have been no fucking conceivable way to break those spells,” he glances towards the youngest vampire who glares back.

“Well it happened, okay, and now is not the time to argue about it, we need to work together to stop him, there is no telling what he is capable of now.”

“Hello!? I have a way to stop him!”

“What is it, Dove?”

“I told you! Jimin needs to bi-”

“No! No way in hell.”

“Oh I am going to kill you!”

“KILL ME?! I’LL KILL YOU.”

“Everyone, silence!” Namjoon bellows and a tense silence settles in the air.

You feel your stomach turn again. You feel winded, like you’ve been running. You massage your temples, wiping away the accumulating sweat. God, how are you supposed to make six stubborn beings listen to you?! Think, y/n. Think!

“Why?” Jungkook speaks first, voice full of pain. “Why Jimin out of all of us?” Your heart drops at his hurt expression. You don’t know the right way to explain to Jungkook, to all of them, why this needs to be done, especially now when your head feels like it’s about to explode. When did you become so jittery? What is happening?! You try to concentrate and think, but where do you even begin? 

“W-We all know the power they have, right?” You gesture to the vampires. “The way they can look into your memories when they…but Jimin has never bitten me,” technically that is correct in this point in time, “only Jin-”

“Yeah, and just why is that?” Jimin looks at the eldest vampire pointedly, crossing his arms, fed up with Seokjin’s obtuse answers. “Explain.”

Seokjin sighs, straightening the wrinkly shirt Namjoon had given him to wear. “It was for your protection,” he addresses Jimin.  

“Protection from what?!” Jimin asks, repulsed. “She can’t hurt me!”

“We don’t have time for this,” you mutter. You feel it, inside of you, in the back of your mind screaming, wrapping around your bones, the dread of something horrible coming for you all. “Seokjin, make Jimin bite me!”

“SEOKJIN DOESN’T MAKE ME DO ANYTHING,” Jimin roars. You couldn’t be any more wrong, Jimin thinks, who the fuck do you think you are, acting like you know so much about Seokjin, about him, better than himself!

“THEN JUST BITE ME!” You scream back. “You’ve been wanting to all this time!”

The pack watches you argue, stunned into silence. This is news to everyone else; Jimin hasn’t bitten you? And furthermore, Seokjin didn’t want him to bite you. Seokjin had found Namjoon and explained most of what happened, but not that. 

---

“Stay here, in case Hoseok returns.” That was a direct order from his pack leader, and as much as Jungkook wanted to disobey and run towards the thundering noise that had rattled their home, the older shapeshifter was leagues above the young wolf in strength and dominance.

It was luck that Namjoon encountered the pair of vampires instead of his brothers. If it had been anyone else, the vampires might not have made it out with their heads. But Namjoon was always the type to observe first, take everything in before making any rash decision, it’s what kept him alive this long and made Namjoon a leader.

Jin and Namjoon were talkers. They were, even in their wildest days, the best at beguiling, enticing, drawing in others with their words, and upon meeting, they realized they had finally met their match. Namjoon’s most favorite nights were conversations with Seokjin, picking apart the intricacies of the humanities. Two beasts had become obsessed with learning and gaining a humanity of their own.

Namjoon would have torn them apart otherwise. But the magical blasts had knocked the younger more confrontational vampire out, and Seokjin pleaded with Namjoon to listen to his story. “Taehyung has escaped.” With a start like that, Namjoon couldn’t resist not learning more.

With the sun soon rising and Taehyung out there somewhere, Namjoon had little options left but to invite the wounded vampires into his home.

While you were in another part of the island healing and trying to bridge the peace amongst two headstrong beasts, Namjoon and Seokjin were coming to their own kind of peace, a détente at least for the time being, an opportunity to speak to each other like old times now that they had a bigger enemy then themselves.

---

“Well now I don’t want to.” Jimin crosses his arms, looking away.

You look at him in disbelief. Ugh. This is driving you crazy, there is no time to be like this. ‘Fucking Jimin,’ he really knows how to push your last button. Fuck, you are so over this!

You think about the crying man on the floor, covered in your blood with a broken expression on his face, you think about that sweet boy, crying for his mother. Somewhere deep inside Jimin is that sweet boy who cried.

You look down at your nails with one last hope remaining. You’ll just have to make him drink from you.

You dig your nails into your forearm, scratching your skin as deep as you can. 

But it was Seokjin who lost control. So many days drinking from you, addicted in more ways than one. His eyes turning red, searching out your blood.

Fur envelopes you, Jungkook and Hoseok shielding you with their large canine bodies while Seokjin lunges for you, stopped short by Namjoon’s fangs.

Jimin throws the beast off the older vampire. Jimin, full of rage, tears his sharp nails into Namjoon’s coat. Yoongi screams for Jin, his influential words finally knocking him out of his blood stupor. Then he calls out to the younger vampire, “Jimin, stop.”

But Jimin is already too full of rage to listen to reason. He can’t stand being stuck in this idiot infested house any longer. It’s insufferable, you’re insufferable, the way you stare at him now. Whatever spell that Taehyung inflicted on you has only changed you for the worse! He should have never listened to Seokjin! He’s beginning not to trust him-

Seokjin addresses the two wolves next to you as the younger vampire lashes out. “Take her out of here, hurry!” he yells, attempting with difficulty to retain the younger vampire with Yoongi’s and Namjoon’s help. 

“No!” you scream at the top of your lungs, “You don’t understand!”

A deep growl from Jungkook frightens you into silence. His fangs are around your stomach, only holding you still, not puncturing into you, but it’s terrifying nonetheless as he yanks you backwards, his hind legs digging into the earth.

You cry once outside, unable to pull yourself together. You pull at Jungkook’s fangs, attempting to unlock his jaw from your side and the large beast begins to whimper in anguish at your attempts to flee from him, extinguishing the fight inside you.

Nothing is working! Nothing! It’s hopeless, you’re all going to die, you think, either by Taehyung’s hands or by each others. You cry harder into Jungkook’s fur, who has wrapped his large canine body around yours.

“…what?” You see it from the open door and your body acts on impulse as you claw at the ground, trying to move closer, uncaring if Jungkook’s teeth tear at your skin. Tears dry up as you watch the house start to glow red, brighter than anything you’ve ever seen before. 

No, that’s not quite true. You’ve seen that red glow befo-

-

“We need a plan, a real one,” Yoongi says, dismissing you. “The longer we wait-”

“Yoongi, do you have anything left that might be powerful enough?” Namjoon asks. “Yoongi, do you have anything left that might be powerful enough?” you murmur to yourself. Jungkook and Jimin glance towards your way.

“I can look,” he says, “don’t hold out hope now that his binds are off.”

“And how the hell did they break?!” Hoseok yells accusingly.

“Don’t look at me…” you whisper. “Don’t look at me!” the merman counters, “There should have been no fucking conceivable way to break those spells,” he glances towards the youngest vampire who glares back.

“Well it happened, okay, and now is not the time to argue about it, we need to work together to stop him-”

“There is no telling what he is capable of now,” you say in unison to the leader, finally aware this is not just some strange case of deja vu. All eyes turn to you. Jimin scoffs, just like he did before, pulling on Seokjin’s shoulder. “...I-I want Jimin to bite me!” you yell. 

“No! No way in hell.” “No! No way in hell.”

“Oh I am going to kill you!” “Oh I am going to kill you!”

“What the hell are you doing?!” Jimin screams accusingly.

You look around, your gaze stopping on the eldest. “Seokjin, make Jimin bite me!”

“SEOKJIN DOESN’T MAKE ME DO ANYTHING,” Jimin roars. “Seokjin doesn’t make me do anything!” you yell back in unison, a satisfied smirk on your face, pointing directly at Jimin.

“How the fuck are you doing that?” the merman questions.

You rub your temples, trying to make sense of it all. ‘This happened before, why has this happened before? This has to be Tae’s doing!’ “I don’t know, I don’t know, but we’ve already had this conversation, and I-I think, I can’t remember, something must have went wrong...Jimin, you need to bite me, right now!”

“Well…” he clears his throat, looking around as everyone has gone deathly quiet, “now I don’t want to,” Jimin crosses his arms.

Ugh! ‘Fucking Jimin,’ he really knows how to push your last button.  “Listen, you’ve already done it once! Just just do it agai-wait, no, we did this already…something is wrong…” 

“Maybe it’s you!” Jimin accuses. “Taehyung has already gotten in her head, how can we trust her?” he warns the others.

“You’re...right!”

“Y/n?” 

“Jimin is right. I can feel him,” you shudder. “Which is why you need to bite me, because I know for certain, Taehyung doesn’t want you to.” You hold your hand to him.

“And if this is a trick?”

“Ugh, I’m not tricking you! I want to stop Taehyung for you, you idiot!”

‘Idiot’?! How dare you call Jimin an idiot, when you’re the biggest of the idiots in this idiot infested house! “And suddenly you have my best interest at heart?!” Jimin yells back, disgust evident.

Ugh, your head is killing you, and you feel it, inside of you, in the back of your mind screaming, wrapping around your bones, the dread of something horrible coming for you all. 

You try to think about everything that has transpired since you met Taehyung, trying to see if you missed anything-

“Wait, wait, wait…ugh, let me go!” you yell at the pack surrounding you. You press yourself against the door, opening it quickly and falling into the sand. 

You look up at the sky, taking a deep breath of fresh air to calm yourself. It’s still daytime, but not for much longer, and you’re scared of what night will bring.

Yoongi is by your side, lifting you up. “Y/n,” you think he is about to dismiss you like he always does, but instead he says, “tell me what I need to do to help you.”

“Yoongi...” You’ve never seen him so sincere before. “Do you think you can use your siren song on Jimin to-”

“I can hear you, pet! It doesn’t work! And I should kill you for even suggesting it.”

“Touch her and I will kill you!”

“KILL ME?! I’LL KILL YOU!”

“Ugh,” you groan, turning your back as the group of stubborn monsters in front of you begin to bicker, deja vu hitting you hard again. “What am I supposed to do? What am I supposed to change?” You ask yourself out loud, head in your hands.

Yoongi holds you steady. “Something definitely is up, and I have a feeling it has something to do with this-” Yoongi looks through his pack.

“T-That’s it! Wait! No!” You yell as Yoongi pulls the gem out of his pack, letting it dangle in his hand.

But it’s too late. You can’t stop it, it’s already starting again, the red glow emanating directly from the gem, covering everyone and everything in that same red hue, until that’s all you can see.

‘Y/n, take it.’

You fall back to the ground and clutch your chest, dismissing the words inside your head, closing your eyes tightly as the gem burns brighter.

-

“Yoongi, do you have anything left that might be powerful enough?” Namjoon asks.

“I can look,” he says, “don’t hold out hope now that his binds are off.”

“And how the hell did they break?!” Hoseok yells accusingly.

“Don’t look at me!” the merman counters, “There should have been no fucking conceivable way to break those spells,” he glances towards the youngest vampire who glares back.

“Well it happened, okay, and now is not the time to argue about it, we need to work together to stop him, there is no telling what he is capable of now.”

“Hello!? I have a way to stop him!”

“What is it, Dove?”

Okay, this is it. “Seokjin, you need to bite me.”

“What!?” Jimin yells angrily.

You look into Seokjin’s eyes, silently pleading with him. “The memory pull, it’s going to work now. Please,” you urge, holding out your arm to him as the pack tries still to barricade your body away from the vampires. “Look into my memories and you’ll understand!”

Jimin pulls the eldest back as he advances. “You’re really going to obey her command? Just like that! Taehyung might have already gotten to her, how can we trust her?!”

“You’re right! Jimin is right. I can feel him. Which is why…” you swallow, looking at Jimin, remembering this same conversation said just another way, wondering just how many times you have tried to convince them. “Which is why, you need to bite me.” You move your eyes to Seokjin, staring ahead steadfast. “So you can see the truth!”

“Why?” Jungkook speaks up, voice full of pain. “Why Seokjin out of all-”

You grab the youngest’s face and kiss him abruptly, silencing his worries.

Hoseok’s stares at you, mouth agape. He doesn’t know whether to be furious with you, or satisfied that Jimin and Yoongi both look so furious with you for kissing the youngest shapeshifter.

“Trust me, please,” your hands shake in your desperation, squishing his cheeks as he looks at you in shock and awe. 

“O-Okay,” Jungkook nods.

The eldest vampire sighs and starts to move closer much to Jimin’s astonishment and disgust. You try to push past the pack’s strong bodies. It hurts them to see you try to go to their enemy, but they let you pass.

Jimin crosses his arms, scoffing as the eldest meets you in the center of the room. Jimin can’t believe he’s stuck here until sunset! Inside this idiot infested house with the biggest of the idiots telling him the most ridiculous things he’s ever heard. Suddenly you want Seokjin to bite you now? When you were just throwing yourself at Jimin! Why?! What happened? What’s the reason? You’re so annoying, you’re insufferable, the way you look at Seokjin with so much hope and trust.

Jimin grinds his teeth together in anger, so hard his fangs begin to pierce his bottom lip.

Seokjin puts his hands up, glancing towards the pack leader, meaning no harm before he bends his head closer to your neck.

“Wait!” Jimin speaks up. “Y/n, you wanted me to bite you, didn’t you? So come here then!”

“Jimin, I-”

“Don’t you dare say it,” Jimin cuts Seokjin off. “You didn’t listen to me about Taehyung, about her, and then you made a truce with them without even asking me! You’re lucky I even speak to you at all!” Jimin is furious with Seokjin, he’s beginning not to trust him...

You raise your eyebrows. “Really? Are you sure?”

“Don’t make me say it again,” Jimin seethes.

You smile, running past Seokjin. You hold out your wrist to Jimin, looking up at him hopefully. 

Jimin scoffs again, gripping your arm painfully and yanking you closer. The wolf trio begin to growl in anger, baring their fangs.

“I choose where I bite you, pet.”

You try to remain calm as the trio behind you let out low threatening growls. Jimin smirks, spinning you around by your arm, hugging you against his body like a shield and snickering at how angry it makes them.

The pack looks ready to attack. Yoongi begins to step forward in his growing anger.

“No!,” you stop him, “J-Just let him do what he wants,” you mutter.

Jimin smirks. “If it was what I wanted, you would be on your knees with your mouth shut.” He sneers, gripping your chin painfully tight and yanking your head backward. “And your head down, thinking about how stupid you are for walking right into Taehyung’s trap.”

‘Like you did,’ you think, keeping your temper in check.  “I know you’re scared, it’s okay.”

“I am not scared!” he hisses, nails digging into your side. You wince. Namjoon’s growls become louder.

“Namjoon, stop!”

Jimin smirks again. “Yeah, listen to her, dog. Since we are all at this human’s mercy,” he scoffs. “You seem to know so much about what happens next, so tell me, is it going all according to your little plan?” He presses his body against yours, holding you tightly.

“You like this, don’t you?” he whispers in your ear, obscenely grinding himself against your backside. Jimin rests his chin on your shoulder, arm still secure around your waist, smirking, intent on drawing this out for everyone involved, “them watching.” His hand grabs your breast roughly. 

Your eyes meet Yoongi’s eyes, dark with anger, and you shut them in shame.

You breathe through your nose as he fondles you for everyone to see, letting out short breaths when he rests his hand over your throat, choosing to submit in hopes he’ll eventually do what you want.

Jimin’s fangs scrape across your shoulder as he revels in the intoxicating feeling of power he has over you and everyone else, finally feeling better about his new situation. He breathes in the anger emanating from everyone in the room, inhaling your sweet desperation most of all.

His fangs scratch the surface of you, up the sensitive skin of your neck until you bleed.

Seokjin drops to his knees, panting heavily, addicted to your blood in more ways than one. Jimin stops, looking over to the older vampire. “I’m fine,” Seokjin pants. “I’m fine.”

Jimin looks coldly down at him, how disgraceful that he’s let you affect him so much. That’s what he gets for drinking from you all the time, for not letting Jimin! He licks the blood off your neck and you shudder. Jimin moans loudly, tasting your blood again finally.

The pack looks ready to kill, they bare their fangs, the restraint in their growls long gone.

“I’m sure they can all smell you from here, I can,” Jimin whispers in your ear, hand pressing down on your lower stomach, taunting you, “You’ve learned to be a good little pet, hmm? Here’s your reward.” Jimin presses his fangs into the column of your neck, directly on your pulse.

“What the hell?” the merman mumbles. There is something glowing in Yoongi’s pack. He fumbles with the latch to inspect it. Yoongi yanks out the red glowing gem, confusion evident on his face.

Oh no. You can feel it again. A familiar voice starts to call out to you. If it wasn’t for the pain in your neck keeping you present, you surely would have lost control.

You clutch your chest as the gem burns brighter. “Jimin! You-”

-

“Yoongi, do you have anything left that might be powerful enough?” Namjoon asks.

“I can look,” he says, “don’t hold out hope now that his binds are off.”

“WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?” Jimin roars, advancing on you and the pack.

“You saw– You know–” you look at Jimin in disbelief. You reflexively cover your throat, the punctures are gone, but your heartbeat is still fluttering. “It wasn’t me!” you yell back.

The younger vampire yanks himself away from Jin’s protective hand. “Taehyung…” Jimin growls. “And you!” He points an accusing finger at the merman. “Give me that gem in your pack right now!”

“How did you know about that?” Yoongi glares at the younger vampire.

He scoffs, “I don’t have to explain myself to you!”

“Well then fuck off,” Yoongi spits out.

Jimin can’t believe he’s stuck here until sunset! Inside this idiot infested house with– ‘Wait,’ He feels it, he can’t explain it, but it’s there, all around him, an inevitability that he can’t control, and it pisses him off! Jimin spins around, baring his fangs, claws ready to strike. 

The group watches Jimin spin around angrily like a confused dog chasing its tail.

“See,” you glare at Jimin, “See how annoying it is!”

Jimin rolls his eyes. “Taehyung. The gem is his. And it seems he’s still using it somehow.” Jimin reasons, looking around at the familiar scene. “Give it, we need to destroy it,” Jimin holds out his hand impatiently. “DAMMIT YOONGI! We don’t have time for this!”

“That’s what I’ve been saying,” you huff.

The merman holds onto his pack defensively. He doesn’t trust Jimin, but he knows they have to work together to stop Taehyung. Jimin is untrustworthy, but Jimin is powerful, more than he even realizes. So Yoongi holds his tongue and relents. 

You clutch your head in your hands. It’s pounding more than ever, and you feel it, inside of you, in the back of your mind screaming, wrapping around your bones, the dread of something horrible coming for you all. “Get it away from me!” you cry out. 

You press yourself against the door, opening it quickly and falling in the sand. Jungkook and Hoseok follow you out, worried for your safety and your quickly declining state of mind.

Jimin scoffs again. Pathetic, he thinks. Humans are scared of their own shadows. He turns his attention on the merman, waiting impatiently. He tries to ignore how close the others are to him as the men huddle around to look at the necklace. 

Jimin holds the gem in his hand, inspecting it. The weight of it in his palm is heavy. He touches the smooth rock, the gem itself is small, but the energy surrounding it is immense, a familiar power the vampire can’t quite put his finger on. ‘Why isn’t it glowing?’ he thinks, and as soon as the thought enters his mind a slow bright red light begins to emanate around the gem. 

“What’s going on?” The pack leader questions, staring at the gem, ready to strike anything that appears. 

“I don’t know.” Jimin doesn’t know how to stop it, but he wishes for whatever is happening to halt.

And as soon as the thought entered his mind the glow begins to recede back into the gem.

“Jimin, you should hold onto that necklace for now.” Seokjin speaks.

Jimin looks up and the expression on Seokjin’s face surprises the younger vampire. He’s seen that hardened look before from Seokjin, in moments when the older vampire begins to feel sentimental. Most recently, the night you came to them. Jimin never questioned it before, but now he wants to, he wants to know all the secrets Seokjin is keeping from him. Jimin is beginning not to trust him-

He grabs the eldest’s shirt collar, yanking him close. “You know what this is?”

Seokjin remains unaffected by Jimin’s outburst, covering Jimin’s hand with his own. “Now that I’ve looked at it up close, yes, I’ve seen it before. I believe, that necklace,” he sighs, “used to be yours. A long time ago, I saw you wear it. Or something very similar,” he swallows.

But before you, Jimin has never seen this necklace before in his life! He stares at the gem. That familiarity he feels can’t be– no, that feeling is just like the other moments of deja vu he has been experiencing, it’s not because…is it? Does this necklace belong to him?

You stare at the wolves’ den, refusing to move any closer. Nothing has happened yet, there is no red glow, and no immediate danger, but you feel at any moment everything could change. You look up at the sky, it’s still daytime, but not for much longer, and you’re worried-

“Y/n?” Hoseok shakes you when you don’t respond.

“Hoseok…” You wonder how many times this moment has repeated itself. Has Hoseok looked at you like this before, his care for you evident in his soft gaze? You try to remember and make sense of what is real. “That necklace, Taehyung used it to escape. I-I don’t know how, I don’t know why. I– Ahhh!”

Your nails dig into your scalp as you desperately try to claw away at the pain. The pain is radiating at your temples, just behind your eyes, in the back of your head, behind your ear-

“Hey, y/n, hey!” Hoseok holds your trembling body, patting your cheek, reminded of the moment he found you on the beach. Your eyes stare at the sky, far away, like you’re lost in your head, unable to hear him.

“W-What’s happening to her?!” Jungkook whimpers. You just came back to him and now he fears he might lose you completely.

Hoseok picks you up into his arms, holding you securely to him. “I don’t know, Namjoon will know. I’m taking her back inside.”

You want to tell him no, you want to tell him to wait, you don’t want to go back in, but you can’t find the energy to open your mouth to speak the words. Your body is betraying you, your vision starts to cloud, and you realize darkness is coming for you, even with the sun still high up in sky. You wish more than ever, you could start over again-

-

“Yoongi, do you have anything left that might be powerful enough?” Namjoon asks.

“Oh,” you groan, falling forward, unable to hold yourself up. The youngest of the pack wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you into his embrace before your knees hit the ground.

Jimin looks around, the gem still heavy in his palm. “The necklace,” he murmurs. It didn’t glow red this time and yet-

“Jimin!” The merman hisses, glaring at the vampire who has somehow taken the gem from Yoongi without him noticing, “Don’t move.”

Jimin’s body, and mind, suddenly feel sluggish. It lasts only a moment before the vampire is shaking himself out of the merman’s mind control. Jimin can’t help but laugh at his weak attempt. 

“DON’T MOVE,” Yoongi bellows, his words echoing throughout the wolves’ den, and everyone, including Jimin, freezes.

“What are you doing, Yoongi?!” Namjoon grunts, stuck in place by the merman’s words.

“I don’t know how, but he stole that from me, from my pack.” The merman walks with purpose while Jimin struggles to move. 

Your eyes go wide when you notice what’s happened. “It’s not his fault,” you mumble, glancing at Namjoon, your eyes and mouth the only part of you able to move, “I think...w-we’re stuck in a time loop.”

“A w-what?” Hoseok grunts, trying with all his might to turn his head.

“W-Well...it’s a lot t-to explain and you’ll probably forget it all anyways,” you whine.

Namjoon raises his brow. He can only slightly move his neck now, and struggles to turn his head to look at you. “Perhaps you should explain anyways. Now.” His tone is serious, potentially menacing if you were being honest.

“I know it sounds crazy, and I know you don’t want him to, shit, what haven't I explained to you yet? Jimin hasn’t actually bitten me yet, well, technically not yet, he has, but it was before I came back, from the future, into now-another time thing.” You start to remember clearly now, though it seems to be still very hard to explain, “Anyways, I know about Jimin’s past! And everything, and-”

“Is she making sense to you?” Hoseok mutters.

“Oh you’re so lucky we haven’t had this conversation before or I would be really blowing your mind,” you grunt.

Jimin’s arms jerk backwards as he fights the merman’s impressive mind control. “It’s mine! Give it back!��� Jimin hisses as Yoongi plucks the gem out of the vampire’s hand mere seconds before Jimin regains control of himself again.

“Jimin, we don’t have the time,” you groan, your limbs finally moving again. “Jimin!” you yell, pulling the vampire’s attention away before he attacks the merman in his anger. 

You struggle in Jungkook’s arms, holding out your wrist to Jimin hopefully. “You know what you have to do, before it happens again!” 

“No!” Jungkook barks, lifting you off your feet to end your advance. 

Jimin exhales. This is insufferable, you’re insufferable, you’re, fuck– It’s happening again. He bares his fangs, letting his anger simmer over this constant deja vu. 

“Wait! Let me see it, that necklace,” Seokjin steps forward curiously.

Yoongi throws his arm backwards out of the vampire’s reach, the gold chain accidentally hitting your outstretched hand.

The gem touching your finger.

It felt like just a graze, so quickly it couldn’t have been longer than a second. Yet you felt it through your whole body.

And then pulling right behind your ear. 

And finally you understood as the brightest flash of red light quickly comes and goes. You hear his voice again, commanding you to do something else, something horrible...

You want to tell them all to run, to escape, but the only words your lips can speak are-

“Taehyung, come in.”

The door shatters, knocking everyone inside to the ground.

The back of your ear feels like it’s on fire and like you summoned the devil himself, Taehyung appears behind you, lifting you up. “Ahh princess, now where did you put my jewel?”

You stand paralyzed by fear, as if gravity chained your limbs to your body.

“Taehyung, leave her alone!” Jungkook roars, and he somehow looks more imposing than the pack leader himself.

Taehyung laughs, looking around incredulously at the monsters surrounding him. 

“I’m saving her from you!” He pulls you close and despite your fear, you gravitate to him. It reminds you of Yoongi’s siren song, but more painful, dark, like ropes around your limbs, a noose around your throat. “You would rather use her, draining her life away because you want a pretty pet-” he looks at Seokjin, “-or keep her here on this island, chained like a prisoner, like you did to me! You just can’t see her potential!”

“You...betrayed Jimin...this is all your fault,” you grunt, barely able to speak the words out loud. 

Taehyung looks at you, eyes softening. “Your loyalty to my brother is sweet. After everything they did to you. You really are perfect. I knew it when I first met you, we were fated to meet. You were the one who was going to save me, and now I can save you.” He holds you close, embracing you how he always wanted to, no chains or shackles between you anymore. “You saw Jimin’s story and believed him. I’ll show you mine, y/n. You’ll see once and for all.”

Yoongi’s nose is bleeding from the explosion. He has the gem hidden in his palm. He doesn’t quite understand how Taehyung appeared so suddenly, or what the gem has to do with it, but he figures no good will come from Taehyung having it, and he intends to risk everything to keep it away from Taehyung. 

He looks at your pain stricken expression and suddenly realizes, no, he can’t risk everything.

“They should have cut off your hands,” Yoongi mutters, wiping away the dried blood from under his nose and standing up. “Thy were too nice to you. When I defeat you I’ll make sure your next cell is underground and twice as small,” the merman tries to goad Taehyung away from you.

“Monster,” Taehyung frowns. “Do you know how many humans he has killed, y/n? How many they’ve all killed? Have I ever killed anyone!” he yells.

“You were going to kill Seokjin!” Jimin argues.

“Seokjin is evil!” he yells back. “And not a human.”

“Okay, Taehyung, you want retribution, we’re all here now. So let y/n go, can’t you see how scared she is?” Namjoon questions, crouching low in fighting stance. His calmness is even more menacing than his anger, you think.

“She doesn’t want me to let her go,” Taehyung smiles, his chin pressing into your shoulder as he continues to hug you close. “Tell them you want to be with me.”

“I want to be with Taehyung,” you cry out, terrified how the words left your lips so quickly, of the way your control is slipping away.

“See, she’s my destiny.” He grins, triumph dripping from his words.

No, no, no. You clutch your chest, where the pain emanates the most, right over your heart.

“Oh, that’s where it went.” Taehyung sighs, petting your head softly. “I’m sorry, one of my attacks must have hit you hard. Let’s go back, out of reach this time. Now, where is my necklace? Tell me, y/n.”

Yoongi, Yoongi has it. It’s Yoongi. It’s Yoongi. It’s Yoongi. Yoongi.

You clench your jaw so tight your teeth begin to hurt. “Who took it?” he asks sweetly.

“Yoongi...” You begin to cry. “Please don’t hurt him!”

The merman speaks up, “Oh, he won’t hurt me.”

“You haven’t changed at all, so arrogant, acting like you’re better than everyone else!” Taehyung says, staring at Yoongi’s closed fist. He flicks his wrist over, fingers pulling at the air. 

A glowing red light starts emanating from Yoongi’s palm, an inescapable power ready to burst from the tiny gem, red streaks of light between his fingers cut through the wolf’s den, knocking back anything it touches.

Yoongi yells in pain, but he refuses to let go of the necklace. 

Unlike the others, when the red light hits Taehyung, he can easily redirect it with his hand, and his beam hits Seokjin, knocking the vampire right in the chest.

You see singes across the eldest vampire’s body, his clothes tattered and deep burn scars across his skin. Yoongi’s hand looks charred too, he yells and doubles over in pain, still fighting to hold onto the necklace. The others are fast, dodging the attacks, but how long can they last? 

Hoseok is hit next, he turns into a wolf instantly, charging towards you. Namjoon runs in to attack Taehyung, who shifts your body in front of the leader. 

The wolves are trying so hard to save you from Taehyung, it breaks your heart to witness the pain they are going through. How can you save them? Protect them? You feel so useless, so human and fragile. A mere pawn in a game played between kings.

If only there was a way to restart this day again.

“Y/n, don’t,” Taehyung whispers in your ear.

The wolves are too worried for your safety to use their full force, something Taehyung uses to his full advantage as he moves closer to the merman still fighting to hold onto the gem.

Jimin doesn’t care about your safety. He crashes into both of you.

You feel the weight of both men on top of you, suffocating you as Taehyung covers your body with his to take the brunt of the vampire’s wild attacks.

However, Taehyung’s physical strength seems to be unmatched, he throws the vampire as if Jimin weighed nothing with only one arm, the other holding your wrist so you can’t get away.

He moves closer to the struggling merman.

This can’t be happening, it can’t end this way, after everything you’ve been through.

Perhaps it was how close to victory Taehyung had been, so close he was only thinking about the outcome of his winning, the great future ahead of him. He was distracted just enough, and the reigns he had held over you loosened just a bit. It cleared your mind just enough, made you hope, wish for help to come for Yoongi and the others.

Your wish fluttered inside you like a heartbeat, pulling you, and this time, pulling everyone…

Through time…

To a place where the merman had an advantage. Your wish was granted.

The thumping receded and seawater filled every space around you suddenly. You were underwater, deep in the sea. You looked around and saw red and blue flashes of light, the shadows of the beast’s bodies around you, blood like red ribbons leaving their wounds. You slowly kick towards the sky.

How deep are you? You don’t know if you can make it to get in air in time.

You scream, the sound muffled underwater, when fingers reach for your hair, jerking your head down.

It’s Jimin. By the look in his eyes you think he might drain you right here, let you drown in a sea of blood, but he reaches for your hand instead and pulls you to the surface at inhuman speed. 

Spluttering, you gasp in air as the ocean lights up the night with streaks of power flashing under water.

“You’re coming with me,” he grunts, dragging your body back to land.

“Yoongi! The others!”

“Hold your breath!” Jimin pulls you back under when Taehyung resurfaces.

You inhale in quickly. You see the sparkling merman’s tail reflecting under water as he attacks Taehyung again.

Red light explodes underwater. Pulsing through the ocean, knocking you back into Jimin. He pulls you away from the fighting, closer to shore until you can stand above water.

You try to keep up, but the night waves crash into your body knocking you off your feet. Jimin drops you into shallow water. You gasp for breath while he looks over you. It reminded you of when you first met him, the way his body is over yours. But his eyes aren’t the same, there’s no hatred in them like before, Jimin looks lost, Jimin looks…sad.

He grabs the front of your dress and rips it, exposing your cleavage. Your arms cover your chest and he yanks those away too. You almost scream, but he doesn’t do anything but look at you. Then his finger traces the scars on your chest, making you shudder. The scar lines form a deep v across your chest, connecting around your neck.

“It was you.” He grips your neck, startling you. “Fix it. Now!”

Moonlight is speckling the ocean’s surface. The water calmer than usual. “Take us back to before Taehyung arrived. Before…” he shudders, looking out at the ocean, up towards the moon angrily. “This is your fault.” Jimin lunges for you, his claws pulled quickly away by Jungkook rushing to your side. Jungkook picks up your exhausted body, wading deeper in the water, glaring at the vampire. “Let’s go.”

“Follow me.” Yoongi yells, further out.

When you reach Yoongi, the youngest reluctantly hands you to him. “Where’s Taehyung?”

“He…took the necklace,” Yoongi says bitterly. “Ready?”

You look at the dark water all around you. “W-Where are we going?”

“My home.”

-

Yoongi swims down to the sea floor. You hold his hand, let the current and his strong fin lead you to the furthest depths of the ocean.

There’s no light, only the faint sparkling reflection of Yoongi’s tail is visible to your human eyes.

Your feet touch the sandy floor. The pain in your ears lessens the longer Yoongi breathes air into you. It’s an odd feeling, walking the sea floor, a place certainly no other living human could walk alone.

‘Jin.’ Your body stiffens in fright. You see the vampire, lying suspended upon the ocean floor. It frightens you how dead he looks, floating there, but for as long as you’ve known him, Jin has always been dead, hasn't he? Jimin passes, hooking Seokjin’s floating arm over his shoulder and pulling the vampire along.

You reach an underwater cave and swim inside. It’s tunnels are vast. The coral crevices hold things, some are man-made items, some magical.

The coral of the cave winds around, creating tunnels that are compact, walls that are cramped together. It’s dark and lonely inside, there is no light, no warmth. Is this where Yoongi stayed? It makes you feel sorry for the merman, makes you want to fill his life with warmth. He swims around quickly pulling things from inside the pockets of coral.

It’s impressive how the wolves can hold their breath, but even at this depth for so long they are having trouble. Even you are almost out of the air Yoongi gave you.

The merman swims to the cave’s bottom. There’s a purple wooden door situated at the cave floor with a spoked handle. The color reminds you of the one in Seokjin’s office. He begins to turn the vault handle quickly, unlocking the door. You watch, holding your body against one of the coral walls, making sure you don't float away. 

You begin to choke on water. The door opens finally and the others rush inside, quickly escaping down into the depths. Yoongi finds you, kissing you. Slowly, taking his time now. 

Submerged in the water, floating, he became the only thing that grounded you. You wish you could speak underwater and tell him how sorry you were for letting Taehyung inside, for causing this all to happen. You kept your lips pressed to his, hoping to convey how apologetic you felt. Yoongi hugs you close and dives into the vault.

You break the surface of the water, somehow right side up now. You wipe the water away from your face as Yoongi holds you to him. You look around the small cave, a part of the underground cave system inside the island. You look down at your bodies still submerged in the water, you should be upside down. How is that possible?

It never ceases to amaze you, the magicalness of this place.

“How is he?” you call out.

“I’ve seen better days.” The vampire in question grunts. Seokjin has definitely seen better days, the usually put together vampire is the most beaten you’ve ever seen him, lying on the cave floor unable to move.

“Jin, would it help?” you offer your wrist to him. You were the only human here.

Seokjin swallows, “Yes.”

“Let me help him,” you beg the others. Namjoon lifts you out of the cave pool. Everyone looks so beaten they don't fight you, they stay silent as you make your way to Seokjin.

“Are you sure, Dove?” he grunts.

You nod, lying against him, finally letting your tired muscles relax. Seokjin drank from you countless of times before, what’s one more?

---

Jimin breaks Seokjin’s jade statue, smashing it to pieces.

“Get away from me!” he screams, “w-who are you?!”

You see Seokjin and Namjoon standing next to him. And you see Hoseok. You see Taehyung.

“Is it normal to forget?” Taehyung asks, watching Jimin curiously.

“No…no,” Seokjin swallows. Had Seokjin really been too late to save Jimin?

Jimin screams and screams, clawing at his throat. It’s dry and itchy, he feels like he’s burning from the inside out. “Stop. Stop it!” The pain won’t stop!

“He needs blood,” Hoseok says, his tone urgent and worried.

“If we bring someone to the island, he’s not going to be able to control himself.”

“I’ll find someone no one will miss,” Hoseok suggests.

“No, it’s still a life.” Namjoon interjects, watching the display, clenching his jaw when Jimin screams again.

“And what about Jimin?!” Hoseok argues. “What about his life?!” You can feel his anger, you feel it too within Seokjin.

“If it’s someone who deserves it, someone bad?” Taehyung speaks up, wincing as he watches his friend writhe in pain.

“Let’s go hunt one last time, old friend,” Seokjin mumbles, unable to look Namjoon in the eyes, watching instead the horrible state Jimin is in.

“Okay, okay.”

It was an easier find than they had thought. During a dark club night, the music boomed as a regular flirted with a young woman. Upon entering the club, Namjoon and Seokjin noticed all the tell tale signs immediately, the signs of a predator..

While Namjoon bumped into the couple, and riled up the man by cozying up to his unsuspecting victim, Seokjin quickly switched their drinks, the one the man had spiked for his date switched with his clean one. While the drug worked its magic, you looked around the club, listening to old music. You watched the bodies on the dance floor move together in almost one fluid motion. You missed it, realizing how long it’s been since you’ve had that kind of fun. Your heart raced as the beat of the song quickened, as urgency ran through the vampire’s cold veins instead of blood. You want to dance. You want to kill that man. You want to save Jimin. Complicated emotions filter through Seokjin and into you.

Your mouth goes slack as you press your body closer, your hands fisting Seokjin’s tattered shirt. “You’re taking too much!” Namjoon barks. 

“I’m sorry.” Seokjin licks your wounds clean as your vision goes hazy and you slump against him. No, you wanted to see more, to listen to more-

---

“Where are you, sweetheart?”

“Taehyung?”

Taehyung covers your cheek with his hand. “Tell me where you are so I can find you, get you away from them.”

“No! You stay away from them!”

Taehyung’s arms cage you in, his body above yours. “Y/n, please,” he begs, lowering himself over you. “I can leave the island now, but I don't want to go, not without you.” He wraps his arms around your body, hugging you close to him in a suffocating embrace. “Please come with me, I don’t want to be alone anymore.”

Despite everything, you feel sorry for him as he shakes against you.

No, no, no! He’s the same man who tried to betray Seokjin. What would he have done to Jimin if he had succeeded? What is he going to do to you? You press against his shoulders, trying to push him off of you. Taehyung covers your lips with his own, lessening your resolve.

His lips work a different kind of magic, he presses his tongue inside your mouth, runs it over your own, tilting his head and deepening the kiss. You grip his shoulders, unsure whether to push him away or closer. He kisses you for so long you wonder how he hasn’t broken away to take a breath, you wonder why you don’t have the need to either.

You gasp when Taehyung decides to move lower down your body, his lips licking across your neck. By now, he’s made sure to keep you locked to him, holding onto both your wrists so you can’t push against him. Even when he shifts his digits and intertwines your fingers, he keeps his weight heavy on you.

“It’s not fair, I can only have you in my dreams like this,” he chuckles against your skin. “Please be with me. Together we can explore the whole world, do whatever we want.” Taehyung was so excited to see all the new technology you had described to him during your long visits. He wants to experience it all with you.

You take in a ragged breath, suppressing a moan every time he sucks and rolls his tongue over your skin. “Promise me you won’t hurt them.”

“I promise.”

You don’t believe him.

You can’t believe him.

It feels like a lie, it all feels like a lie.

“Where are you?”

“In a cave.”

“There are thousands of caves on the island, do you know where?”

“I d-don’t know.”

It’s true you don't know, but there are words you could use to describe the cave. You could tell Taehyung how you got there, about Yoongi’s magical door. But you bite those words down, hiding the whole truth.

“Don’t worry, I’ll find you.” He rests his forehead against yours, runs his thumb over your kiss bitten lips. He can't wait to have you, to mark you, to make you like him.

You touch the necklace dangling from Taehyung’s neck, and he rips your hand away, gripping your wrist so tightly you can feel the pressure in your bones.

Fear trickles down your spine and catches in your throat once you realize how entangled you are to him, how easily he could hurt you if he wanted to. The Taehyung you knew had been so unthreatening, like a lonely puppy tied to a tree, only wanting attention.

The shackles took away any threatening aura, you only ever felt safe with him, you hadn't yet known what he was capable of...

Taehyung feels your heart beat jumping against his lips. “You’re scared of me, why?” he frowns. “Have I ever given you a reason to believe I would ever hurt you? Jimin hurt you, Seokjin hurt you,” he adds.

You swallow, unable to answer him. He’s right.

“If you hated Seokjin so much...why did you want to become like him?”

Taehyung holds you loosely now, smiling softly. “You know...Namjoon, Hoseok, Jungkook, their powers slow their aging, but one day, they’re going to grow old, they’re going to grow weak. They’re going to die,” he hums.

“T-That’s no excuse-”

“Sometimes we have to lose everything to gain everything.”

“Is that what you told Jimin before you took everything from him?!”

“Seokjin’s affliction really did rub off on you. What will you say when you make him remember and he still wants to rip your throat out?”

You swallow, silenced by his words.

“Tell me where you are so I can protect you,” he presses his lips upon the column of your neck tenderly.

“T-The cave-”

“Yes?” Taehyung runs his tongue along your throat, enjoying the way you tremble against him.

“-a d-door-”

His hands knead your side, up your body, gripping your mounds, caressing your suppleness.

“A door? Invite me in then, sweetheart.”

Your fingers tangle his hair, pulling him closer to you. Then run down his neck, slipping under his necklace.

You yank the gold chain, screaming.

---

“You’re awake,” Jungkook says happily. You’re lying nestled in between bodies, warm in the otherwise cold and dark cave. “Are y-you okay?”

You close your eyes, calming down, shaking your head, worried your words won’t be your own.

Namjoon holds your hand, “Y/n, can you tell us anything about what happened to the watch I gave you?”

Your hand cups your neck, where Seokjin’s bite is now healed over. “T-Taehyung, he said he would ‘fix’ the watch for me. He must have, because...it must have been, three months ago? I found that red amulet, it was from Seokjin’s shop, it appeared in my hand and then I heard Taehyung’s voice in my head, and…and I-I had no control...” You remember it clearly now, “The watch took me back in time and broke as soon as I used it.”

You look down at your hands. “But I still had the one I hadn’t used yet, from this time…” you say, absentmindedly touching your collarbone out of reflex. “When the explosion happened, I-I don’t know, I-I lost them.” Namjoon inspects your neck, gently adjusting the torn fabric of your dress.

He looks over his shoulder, where the merman lazily swims in the cave pool. “Yoongi?” he asks. 

“The stronger the magic, the more uncontrollable it becomes. If Taehyung’s attack hit her...and the watch…anything could be possible.”

“What do you mean?” you ask.

“Does that human brain of yours not work at all anymore?” Hoseok complains, sitting at the top of your head, looking down at you with crossed arms. “The watch’s magic, it’s inside you.”

“...what,” you ask horrified. You trace the scars across your chest, running up your clavicle and around your neck.

“You were trying to protect yourself from Taehyung,” Yoongi says knowingly. “You took us forward in time.”

Yoongi had noticed the stronger tides, looked up at the moon, and realized the phase had shifted 4 days ahead.

But how could that be? Then when he mentioned it to the others, they all realized…

“I-I can’t control it.”

“And we’re not even sure what it does to her when she uses it,” Hoseok says, concerned, thinking the worst. There is no telling what will happen to you in the end, are you losing hours off your life? Days? 

“Where’s Jimin?”

“Cooling off, taking a late night swim.” Seokjin sighs. “Dove, what happened between you and Jimin in this future of yours that makes you think he will be so cooperative?”

It felt wrong, telling his story, intimate memories that he didn’t even have the chance to see yet. “His past…”

“You know his whole past?” Hoseok asks. You nod. “And you trust him? After everything you know?”

“You don’t know what he’s been through! Taehyung-”

“They worked together to betray us all,” Hoseok scoffed.

You shake your head. “Taehyung knew Jimin before he knew you, Hoseok.” You’ve seen enough of their memories together to see how protective Hoseok had been over Taehyung. But the secrets Jimin and Taehyung had kept weren’t even knowledgeable to Jimin anymore.

“No-”

“Yes.”

“Did you know about this?” Hoseok turns to his pack leader. 

He shakes his head no, “They acted like strangers. Did you know?” Namjoon turns to Seokjin.

“He didn’t speak much of his childhood, even when he was human.” Seokjin hums, “The few memories of his childhood I pulled did not have any indication they knew each other. They had only become close after Jimin was turned.”

“No, they were always close.” you say, sure of yourself. “I can’t prove it, yet, but I don’t think what happened was an accident,” you look at Hoseok. “It wasn’t your fault you lost control, Hoseok.”

Hoseok's eyes start to shine in the shadows of the cave as tears well up. “No,” he says in disbelief. It was his fault. He turned Taehyung into a beast like him, and he’s never forgiven himself because of it.

He shakes his head, unable to let your words really hit him.

“Well, we can only learn the whole truth from Jimin himself. Help me this time, please?”

---

Jimin returns later than usual, right before sunrise, his mind no less at ease.

-

“Well, it almost worked last time.” 

-

Has Seokjin been drinking from you this whole time?! Jimin scoffs, settling himself away from you and the others. 

Seokjin does it messily, letting the blood drip down your shoulder, covering your chest in the red liquid.

You let a soft whimper escape your lips, moaning. Seokjin’s hand moves from your hip to resting between your legs

“Are you going to be doing that all day?!” Jimin barks, his words echoing in the small cave.

“You haven’t drank in a while, brother. Come drink.” Jimin swallows hard, smelling your blood, the sweet iron scent fills the cave. He remembers the previous time loop, the taste of your blood still a strong memory. It never happened, he hasn’t really tasted you, yet that’s now all he can think about. He remembers it distantly like a dream. Or rather a nightmare, how can you possibly be this annoying to him without even trying? Jimin silently seethes as his throat becomes itchier and drier.

Jimin looks over at the wolves, who seem to be minding their own business. There is no way they are not affected by this...lewd display! He narrows his eyes on Hoseok, the jealous one, who sits crossed-legged and crossed-arms, eyes closed and jaw clenched.

-

“You’re joking?”

“No, I saw them do it before with other girls,” you mutter, unable to meet Hoseok's eyes, “in Seokjin’s memories.”

-

Jungkook rests his head against the pack leader’s shoulder, shaking his legs to a song in his head he is using to distract himself, and Namjoon acts completely unaffected. Jimin scoffs, Namjoon sure has the best poker face, but Jimin knows this is bothering the pack. They probably finally figured out they’re weaker ones amongst them, Jimin thinks.

“Well if you won’t, then I will.” Namjoon speaks up.

Namjoon pulls your leg, pulling you closer to him as he crawls over you. His strong hands press your legs open so he can settle in between them.

“You know my kind bites too. We don’t do it to suck blood, our bite is different. But, I wouldn’t mind eating you up,” Namjoon teases, his deep voice even deeper in his gruffness.

You know this is just an act, but your heart escalates at the thought, remembering the younger werewolf acting so brazenly. Devious suits Namjoon so well, the roughness in his nature is so attractive.

Jimin grits his teeth at such a revolting thought.

“You’re just going to let him put his filthy paws all over her? You’re going to hand her over just like that?”

“I haven’t let her go.” Seokjin caresses your temples, smearing blood across your face. “We used to do this all the time. I’ve gotten used to Namjoon’s scent.”

Jimin looks away, looking for the merman, someone else he can yell at.

“Joon, wait. Jimin, did you want to drink from me instead?”

“No thanks,” Jimin hisses.

You look back at Namjoon. Seokjin lifts your hand to his mouth, biting down on the fleshy part of your palm. It hurts, he is usually better at making the pain feel pleasurable, but his objective isn’t your pleasure, it’s to cause maximum blood flow, to make you cry out in pain, knowing your whimpers will entice Jimin the most.

Namjoon’s lets his teeth scrape across your thigh. “Shh little Dove.” He uses the pet name Seokjin gave you. “Don’t cry, I’ll make you sing.”

It’s so hot in this goddamn cave. The smell of everyone’s arousal is assaulting, inescapable.

“My turn next,” Hoseok calls out.

“I’m going to mark her as my mate,” Jungkook growls, eyes darkened at the sight of you writhing in pleasure and pain.

Jimin has had it. He has had to endure being in their company for this long, but now the dogs want to defile what is his? Yes, you are his and Seokjin’s! They paid fairly for you, you would be dead if it were not for them. You are theirs! You are his. And you are the only human left on this damned island, Jimin had searched all night for any signs of life to no avail.

“I’m going to rip out your teeth,” Jimin threatens lowly.

“Did you say something?” Hoseok says flippantly.

“You don’t think I know what you’re all doing?”

You look between yourselves in silence.

“You’re just giving up! Taehyung really turned you into a bunch of cowardly dogs. You’re just gonna stay in this cave like a bunch of animals in heat while Taehyung does god knows what!?”

You continue to look between yourselves in silence.

He points at you. “She said if I bit her, we could stop Taehyung!” He yanks you to your feet so hard you feel the whiplash in your bones. “Isn’t that right? SO WHY ARE YOU WASTING YOUR PRECIOUS TIME WITH THEM?!” Jimin yells so loud his words echo over and over again.

You blink. “You’re right, Jimin.”

Jimin moves behind you, tilting your head. He licks the old blood off your shoulder, suppressing a groan at the taste. “If this doesn’t work-” he growls.

“It will.”

“Then I wont stop until it does.” All your blood will be Jimin’s one way or another.

He licks his lips before sinking his teeth into the column of your neck.

---

Just like that, you and Jimin revisit his bedroom, a memory you both shared, your past and his future had Taehyung’s plan not have worked.

-

Jimin roars, pulling away. Your body spasms with too much blood loss. Jimin looks down, your blood covering his body, his pants undone. How is he in bed with you? He was just in the merman’s cave, drinking your blood.

No, he is in the merman’s cave. This is a memory.

Jimin remembers. 

He gently turns your body over. Your breathing is ragged, strained, your eyes try to focus on the vampire above you.

Now you remember, it was the first time Jimin looked at you without hatred in his eyes. Tearing the flesh from his arm, he puts the wound over your mouth and you drink until your body relaxes. Then cautiously, Jimin lowers himself over you again, ready to see more.

---

Jin steps closer, followed by the rest of the men. 

Was Jimin still drinking from you?

Neither of you made any movement.

You both fell to your knees with Jimin’s fangs deep in your neck, your eyes glazed over and out of focus. 

“What happened?” Namjoon whispers to the eldest vampire. He wasn’t quite sure, neither of you were responsive, both lost in your heads. 

“Little Dove?”

---

I am so excited to write some backstory finally!!! Are you excited for the next chapter?

[moonlynn]

[NO CC] A Greek House with 6 bedrooms and 5 bathrooms

DOWNLOAD: sfs | modthesims

I did this greek house to put in Diphylleia's University but it ended up so nice that I decided to share. You can also use it as a dorm too! To guide, I put the names of the rooms on the floor plan down below, but you don't need to follow it strictly!

You may have to use ChangeLotZoning cheat to turn it into a greek house or a dorm.

This house is made in a 40x60 beach lot and costs $106,081. I have the Ultimate Collection, but I think I used those packs: Apartment Life, Bon Voyage, Celebration, Freetime, OFB, M&G and University.

[mdameninie]

Où se loger à #Monaco ?

[irregularcollapse]

for the kiss drabble ask, 38 for clegan!! (38's is this: …because they’re running out of time. it feels beautifully angsty)

i'm going to cheat!! because! i wrote this for a christmas fic that i may or may not finish on time. but it fits the prompt! and maybe has some of the requested angst. i've been mulling this prompt over and over since you sent it, and i think the concept wormed its way into my planning for this fic. and hopefully if i make it known that i'm writing this, i can guilt myself into finishing it on time! perhaps!

requisite context is that Bucky is about to get on a plane (to LONDON!!!) and go away for a year (or will he?). he is around 23 years old, and Gale is around 20.

this is currently not proofread or edited! still very much in the working stages! but a little preview of something Christmassy.

38. ...because they're running out of time.

“It was your idea, Buck. You told me to go.”

“For a month or two, not—It’s a whole year, John. And maybe it don’t seem like long right now, but you’re gonna—”

“Forget you? Come on. Babydoll,” he croons, maybe a little hammed, and it turns out Bucky is the one looping arms around Gale’s neck and tugging him in, kiss landing on his cheekbone. “How could I?” When Gale breathes out, it huffs and shakes, warmth stuttering over Bucky’s neck. His arms come up, wrap around Bucky’s middle, vying for closer contact against the barrier of his backpack. Some jostling, and he shoves it out of the way, arms locking in a solid brace.

“I know you—you ain’t the pen-pal type. And you’re gonna meet people.”

“Buck, baby, don’t think like that, alright? It’s only a year.” When Gale doesn’t reply, only drops his forehead to Bucky’s shoulder—another way of not looking Bucky in the eye—he finds himself gritting a sigh. “You should come with me.” The shake of Gale’s head is almost immediate, and he doesn’t straighten.

“You know I can’t do that.”

“Fuck, Gale. I don’t know, then. I—” He sucks his teeth, shifting until he can drive Gale backward by the shoulders before tripping fingertips over his hardened jaw. There aren’t tears in his eyes. There’s not much of anything at all, just that crystal emptiness. Bucky’s palm slots against his jaw the way it always has; neat, easy, object and receptacle. He tucks some of Gale’s hair behind his ear without thinking about it, just something his fingers know how to do. “If I’m going to bet on anything, I’m going to bet on us, Buck.”

Gale’s eyes are huge, and hollowed, shadowy with what could be the lack of sleep: they’d stayed up all night after the bon voyage get-together, talking, and fooling around, and then he’d spent most of the morning checking everything in Bucky’s suitcase. His silences stretched as the day went on, until the drive to the airport had him only humming as punctuation to anything Bucky said as he drove. The rose-gold of his complexion looks grayish and murky under the halogen lighting. Even his lips are pale, held tight but seeming to sag.

“Don’t say that. You don’t know.”

“And you don’t, either.” Maybe Bucky is trying, a little bit, to push a smile onto Gale’s face with the way his thumb rubs at the corner of that drooping mouth. Still a sweet thing, pouting and pretty, but it’s miles from the devoted sadness that Bucky fantasized about: Gale looks as though he could throw up. “You know something I do know?” The grip on Gale’s face is more of a guide now, keeping his head straight. Bucky can’t do anything about his gaze, which does drop and flicker even as his hands come up to wrap around Bucky’s wrists. “I know I love you a whole lot, and I’m not a quitter. Not when I worked so hard to get you, huh?” He tucks away another wisp of Gale’s hair, lingering a moment in trailing through the length of it to his shoulder with meditative fingers. He’d dreamed of this as well, in the months before making his move. There’s no giving it up, no possibility of it, not when Gale leans into his touch like that even while looking so drained of all his light.

Bucky swallows, and a jagged rock works its way from the back of his tongue through his chest and into his stomach.

“I’ll be back at Christmas, for a bit. I’ll come back, alright? It’ll be you an’ me, same as always. C’mere, baby.” He can feel the downturned slope of Gale’s lips against his own, and the wetly quivering breath that Gale draws in, but he does kiss back. He kisses back, and a TSA agent is shouting to remind everyone in the queue to remove their shoes, and a big bubbling family are all talking over each other, and there’s a final boarding call crackling across the PA system, and Bucky’s heart is throbbing and thumping in his ears, but when Gale murmurs something into his mouth, he thinks that it might be, “Don’t count on it.”

(from these kiss prompts!)

[andy-wm]

hey andy, loving your posts recently; was wondering what your take is on why jikook chose to film their trip and share it with fans instead of just traveling on their own? any thoughts?

Hey Anon, thanks for the ask and your kind words :)

I have a few thoughts on this actually!

After a conversation with my semi-ARMY, BTS loving, ride or die Jikooker (with caveats) bestie (yes, it's complicated but I fully support their right to choose a safe place in (or not in) this fandom that serves them as an individual 💜), I took a moment to think about how often Jimin and JK get to spend time together.

(Tldr: not often, so they take what they can get)

I think their choice to share their trips with us hinges around a few things -

Contracts, MS rules, group hiatus, ARMY, schedules, and (hopefully) themselves.

BTS renewed their contracts not too long ago and those contracts would have specified certain obligations and opportunities for each member, in line with the planned group hiatus and MS.

It looks like, with the new contracts, they all signed up for heaps of individual projects. Everyone seems to be doing at least one album, a live performance, a documentary, a guest appearance/collab, an episodic format media project, and perhaps some sort of idol-ajacent work like endorsements (or maybe in Joonie's case the MOMA docent recording.)

I assume this series is their combined episodic media project box being ticked.

Why would they choose this and not a series like Jinny's Kitchen, or Suchwita?

Working independently on their own projects for the previous year would have meant their schedules didn't necessarily align too often. Although I have no doubt they would have made time to see and support each other (Jimin going to Qatar as an example), it would have been hard to be apart when they're so used to being together.

Seeing that they had the option to take a sanctioned trip together as a couple best friends, it makes sense that they did that instead of filming a scripted /directed program in a studio with other random cast members and more schedules to try and work around.

In all honesty, the likelihood of them getting the chance to get away together on a personal trip would have been slim, i think. No time for that!

Assuming I'm right about the contracts, if they didn't take this opportunity, they would both have been involved in other projects to meet their obligations. More schedules, more time apart, more energy spent interacting with random strangers (we know they don't love that).

Three trips away together! What a boon!

And all they need to do is be themselves.

They have done so many similar projects - Now series, Bon Voyage, ITS, and even JK's GCFs... This is relatively easy for them. Plus it's a 'tried and trusted' format that ARMY loves.

And they're so used to having cameras around them, and they know the staff so well, that i don't think the presence of a film/support crew would have significantly detracted from the fun they had.

The time they spent together would have been a blessing, especially before they knew the were successful in the companion bid. And speaking of that, they could not have had these trips unless they were work-related due to MS regulations.

They still have this bizarre idea we might forget them. Hilarious, right?

We all know that the reasons they do these programs are first financial (keep those army dollars rolling in) and second, fan engagement.

Reality type shows are the best for an authentic connection to these guys, and we love that. We don't need much more than them being and doing and exisiting, for us to be happy.

Just quietly, I dont think Hybe really realise how easy we are. I'd watch jimin scroll on his phone and occasionally laugh, or yawn, or eat a snack, and I'd find it endearing and a worthwhile use of my time.

In summary, this series is a gift for us, and easy money for Hybe, its a win-win.

And if Jimin and JK have fun and get time together, its a win for everyone.

💜🏕💛

[curio-queries]

I agree, I think the main character was always meant to be their relationship. I think when they were planning the show that must have been a discussion, because it would be self-evident once they were traveling together, same as it came out so strongly when they were in BV3 and walking around together. Obviously the jeju episodes were hijacked so to speak (but imo mostly served to show us the incredibly intimate bond Jikook share), but yes, the main character is that, it is meant to show us them, as they are. They said this too in their first intro.

I also think it was a way for JM to make up to JK for his busy period, and spend quality time being free to travel together. They obviously say that to open the show, so it is not a reach. But, it is more than that, I think he truly does care about JK and his happiness. He also says that a few times in jeju and in Sapporo so far, as long as JK is happy, that is what mattered, and I am like that in my relationship. It truly shows how much they both care for each other.

I love that in episode 6, all they really do is check into their hotel, eat snacks, go to a 7/11, eat more, talk, go to bed. Then JM is there calling JK into the bathroom to take a selfie because 'they made memories here'. it is so sweet, because really all I think he is referring to is them being together, enjoying the normal/mundane things. Then they go on to do more of that, walking the snowy streets to go find food, coffee and ride a train. Things a lot of us will take for granted, often complain about probably. I know they had a lot of staff to protect them/look out for their wellbeing, but we have. to remember they are used to that, and so for them, it is just being out and about on a normal day, doing normal things, together.

Hi anon,

I'd definitely be interested to learn a little more about the scope of AYS and how it developed. I've still been thinking about the idea of the relationships as the main character and how that could have developed throughout the production. It's been a while since I've watched Bon Voyage but I don't think the same could be said there. BV is absolutely modeled after typical travel shows where the journey/destination becomes the chief focus.

I do think there was space for the Jeju eps to open the focus to all three members' relationships and I do believe it was mostly successful. It's one of the reasons why all of the pool segments didn't feel repetitive, there was a different mixture of members each time: taekook, jikook, vminkook. Even though they recreated some of the same bits in each subsequent scene, they weren't cut our of the edit because it didn't feel like repeat moments due to the changing dynamics and thus fulfilling the goal of exploring the differing relationships.

On a complete sidenote, while we're sharing lovely bursts of joy from ep 6, let me share mine about the memories moments as well. I have a family history of memory loss-related illnesses so I've always been hyperaware of my own shortcomings with my memory and made my peace with the likelihood that I will have my own journey on that path as well. There was a phrase I heard years ago that has given me a lot of comfort: our character has still been influenced by those we love even if we lose the memories associated with them.

This episode spending so much time talking about making memories in such a sweet way just reminds me how much Jimin and Jungkook want to have eachother influence their character. They have so many extraordinary events in their lives and while they may not remember the exact day-to-day detail, they have absolutely helped shape the other's character. I just think it's especially lovely.