#body image !

[nellieshill]

I had this conversation with my boyfriend like a week ago!! I was complaining that you can’t alter your body size at all in Baulders Gate 3. He said it would be difficult to format all those cut scenes and detailed clothing items for minutely different body proportions, and the game already took so long to develop. I pointed out you don’t even have a choice between “skinny” “athletic” and “curvy” that we see in some video games now. You can’t be fat in video games because nobody would ever want to be fat, and if you ARE fat, don’t you use video games to escape from reality? You get to be skinny!

But I don’t WANT to be skinny, I want to be me! I don’t care if drowsy or elves are classically portrayed as all thin and feminine! I want to be a drow with CURVES and FAT. I want to be a fat farmer! Space explorer! I want to see ME doing all these amazing things.

actually now that i'm thinking about it. every single video game that lets you costumize characters but doesn't let you be fat is extremely revealing to the fact that most people can't imagine fat as something a person would want to be. there's other examples but like, fuck, i can't even choose to be fat in imaginary spaces. My size isn't accommodated for because they couldn't imagine a player who wants to be anything other than skinny.

Like, you see it right. How media shapes people's beliefs, and people construct beliefs into the things they create? If all you can ever choose to be in a game is one of two body shapes, and you have to physically alter the game to be anything bigger, like. "why would i imagine a world with you in it."

[teenylovin]

u can’t tell here but i was actually looking at my cat in this pic …. ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹🐾

[megacucked]

nora; retired ao3 fan fic writer. current bl watcher. how many cats does it take to be a crazy cat lady? because i have 3 and a puppy. chats is rebellicns

[trendingon-eharmony]

[shrimppendant]

[punkinspicd]

coll-ette. girls with swords, rb if you agree. pokemon obsessed barista with a penchant for bad memes and jokes. come be my pal at punkinspicd on google chats. :)

[inflatingnblue]

Soooo note to self, when you're PMSing and bloating multiple days in a row, your body will hang on to that bloat for multiple days as well... 😬 It kind of feels like I'm stuck as a mini blueberry now. 😳 Hopefully things settle down once this cycle is over.

[jewishjunkie]

Today was quite a day

[catharsisndarkness]

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

Hey uh. Stupid question but I've never seen anyone talk about this so I'm not sure if that's an eating disorder thing or if it comes from another one of my issues:

Is it common for people with restrictive eds to absolutely despise being touched? I have like this...issue with being touched in any way by anyone. Like for example the idea of being hugged terrifies me. The thought of being embraced or cuddling with someone is sickening and makes me want to run away. Even kissing someone is basically impossible for me. A lot of my issues in my relationships were built on the fact that I can't let anyone touch me.

The thing is, I have no idea WHY it terrifies me so much. My current working theory is that maybe my eating disorder is convinced that if someone touches me, they'll know what my body feels like, and if my body isn't bony and "sharp" enough, it will be found insufficient and repulsive and they'll hate me or hurt me (because in my mind: sharp and bony = invulnerable and hard; anything softer than pure bone = vulnerable and weak). But I've never seen anyone else express this sentiment when it comes to EDs, so I'm wondering if that's like...something that can happen as a direct product of EDs or if it's more likely that that's coming from my other issues.

You know, I bet you're not alone in this! EDs are often comorbid with other mental health issues, so I'm sure there are a LOT of people with EDs who have complicated feelings around touching. For example, a lot of autistic people are highly sensitive to being touched by other people, and especially when they're in a state of physical or emotional dysregulation. EDs are common in people with a history of trauma, too, if you think that could have something to do with it. Or in people with dysphoria...the list goes on. Our experiences with our bodies can be complicated.

Honestly, you may have to keep doing the work of figuring out what specifically makes touch difficult for you. You could maybe explore it a little bit in regards to questions like: are there certain times when being touched is harder? What's going on in your life at those times? Are there certain parts of your body that are better or worse for enduring touch? Does that fluctuate?

What comes up for you when you are reacting negatively to touch? If it's not a specific thought but more of a body feeling, maybe check in on that? Does touch become more tolerable through layers of clothing? Do you experience different reactions with different people touching you?

There may be a lot of factors interacting with each other right now. I hope you are able to find answers and solutions that work for you!

[erotyki]

[incognitopolls]

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[gor3sigil]

If you're all about body positivity but make fun of men with hairline receiding or bald, fat, with a beer belly etc, no you're not.

Pretty sick and tired of seeing people laugh and trash men who are not tall skinny queer looking white dudes and be like "everyone is beautiful" in the same breath.

[mactiir]

For my entire life people have told me I am "naturally athletic". I am not "naturally athletic": I am an asthmatic with historically really poor cardio health and joints that partially dislocate themselves if I put pressure on them slightly weird. What I *am* is naturally tall and slender, even more so when I did absolutely no physical activity and ate very little because my neurodivergent body didn't give me hunger signals, which most people mistake for "naturally athletic".

That's not to say I don't have the potential for athleticism. My mother, who has never been under 250 pounds my entire life, is built of sheer farm girl muscle, has stellar blood pressure and cardio health despite her weight, and could (and has!) bodily haul me and my grown brother around like we weigh nothing. When I was a kid the woman was biking triathlon distances before we were even awake for school. The woman is an ATHLETE, and her whole life she has been obese (and heard from everyone and their dogs that she needs to lose weight).

I'm not sure where I'm going with this long piece of anecdotal evidence, except to say: my whole life I heard I was naturally athletic, until I actually became athletic. Because the thing is, I put on muscle like my mom. It fills out my shoulders and arms and makes me look big, thick, and barrel chested. "Genetically beefy", as my brother puts it. And suddenly I wasn't getting comments about my athleticism anymore. I'm quite literally the healthiest I've ever been. I can run for miles, lift my weight, my balance and heart health are excellent. I'm just bigger now. And not one stranger has a comment about my physique since I got fit. Because I don't look like what they think "naturally athletic" is.

I guess what I'm saying is, maybe don't let your perception of what "athleticism" or "health" LOOKS like color your perception of like. People's actual health.

[beegalactica]

real 'glow up' advice i wish i had

Imagine getting to the point in life where YOU are your own vision board; where you are that girl who has the life that you want, and you don't have to seek it out through other people. That should be the ultimate goal.

Here are subtle things that you should be doing to channel your ideal person and improve yourself for the better FROM THE INSIDE

take care of your hygiene: brush your teeth every day, wash your face with soap, wash your hair, take meaningful showers

be kind to yourself: speak nicely to yourself, treat yourself every now and then, love yourself exactly the way you came

make the effort: do your hair and wear something cute, even if you're only going to the supermarket. I bet your ideal self looks stunning wherever she goes, so make that effort if you really want to become her

move your body: dance to some music for just 5 minutes, take a walk, get off the bus a (reasonable) few stops earlier and walk the rest of the way

romanticise the hell out of your life: wear those bows, create that vision board, play that aesthetic background music even if you're just washing the dishes, wear that outfit!!!!!

admire yourself: look at yourself in the mirror and remember what you look like, take a million selfies to look back and smile at, give yourself a compliment every time you pass your reflection

get creative: if you want cute decor, make it! if you want cute clothes, find some easy DIYs!

focus on what you can control: if you cannot change the situation, let it resolve itself. don't waste your precious time obsessing over something you cannot change

get to know yourself (again): rediscover your hobbies, try new activities, learn to appreciate your solitude, get out of your shell

I really wish I was part of a community like this when I was going through a really insecure and lonely phase of my life.

Instead of deciding to wake up a 3am every day from now on, and trying to reach 20k steps every day, start small and walk your way up to greatness!

[welldrawnfish]

mini comic