#blood diner

[fanofspooky]

[igaveuponlifealongtimeago]

rewatched, blood diner this movie is so stupid man i love it.

two absolute morons start a cannibalism diner to help their dead uncle resurrect their goddess sheetar.

their uncle is now a brain in a jar btw

at least i think its a parody, the police crew make me think it is for sure. you cant possibly be so on the nose without it being self aware and poking fun at the genre.

3 1/2 star, me likey

[bagofbonesmp3]

jackie kong on set

[adamwatchesmovies]

Blood Diner (1987)

Though Blood Diner is called a horror comedy, it’s never scary. It is plenty bloody, however. With abundant dark laughs and a self-aware sleaziness that gives the film a lot of personality, this is one I could see the right audiences calling a new favorite.   Brothers Michael and George Tutman (Rick Burks and Carl Crew) are the owners of a wildly popular vegetarian restaurant. The restaurant’s secret? The special ingredient is meat. What kind of meat? Human. See, as children, they witnessed their beloved uncle Anwar Namtut (Drew Godderis) die in a police shootout following a ritualistic massacre. They've resurrected him as a brain in a jar and seek to fulfill his mission: resurrecting the ancient Lumerian goddess Sheetar. To bring her back to life, they need to collect body parts from a variety of immoral women, put together a “blood buffet” made from organ meats from other immoral women, and then have Sheetar devour a virgin. As the bodies pile up, detectives Sheba Jackson (LaNette LaFrance) and Mark Shepard (Roger Dauer) investigate.

Based on that synopsis, would it surprise you to learn this movie has more topless women than an hour of Naked News? Sheetar’s new body must be pieced together from sleazy women, the kind that would participate in a naked cheerleading competition, or go back to someone’s place after speaking with them for less than 5 minutes at a bar. It isn’t enough that they chop up a whole group of women and stitch them together in a new beautiful body; they need more ladies of ill repute to fillet and feed to the unsuspecting guests who will attend the resurrection ritual. The buffet recipes only calls for a few choice bits so the rest of the evidence must be disposed of by sneaking it into the regular menu items at the Tutman restaurant. Good thing the customers are so busy stuffing their faces they don’t notice the disappearing patrons or the multiple instances of the boys walking into the dining area covered in blood, hands full of dripping intestines!

You can tell everyone involved in Blood Diner was having a good time. The actors are having conversations with a brain in a jar, wounds that would be fatal and horrific are made ridiculous and laugh-out-loud funny. The special effects and gore are pretty good, but not so good that you’re disturbed by any of them and once in a while, the visuals are as cheesy as the rest of the plot - giving you another reason to laugh. There’s something delightful about the fact that these two numbskulls are picking up all of these hussies but also have to befriend a gentle virgin (Lisa Elaina) and get her to go on a “romantic date” that involves wrestling and culminates in this awesome ancient Lumerian dinner that she’ll "definitely love"!

As much fun as Blood Diner is, there are a few parts here and there that could’ve been ironed out. There are one too many references to Nazis, there's a death in Bronson Cave that feels a little too random and the ending - while delightfully weird - can’t make up its mind about what it wants to do with the music. There’s a band playing, but they keep getting interrupted by the movie’s soundtrack. Otherwise, Blood Diner is pretty great. There are many memorable scenes, gags, and characters. The one I’ll remember best has nudity in it (not for the reasons you think) but a runner-up has to do with a rival vegetarian restaurant owner who has an unfortunate encounter with the brothers - it doesn't go the way you think it will.

Blood Diner is the kind of movie I can’t give more than a 3.5/5 rating to, but could see myself re-watching again before some 5-star movies. It’s weird and quirky, distinct, unapologetic and consistently gruesome - in a funny way. (January 2, 2023)

[billlaotian]

[neon-green-reagent]

Blood Diner (1987) 

[gifnebula]

[soimarriedahorrorfan]

It's a brand new month here on So I Married A Horror Fan! We are kicking off March in the wildest way possible by looking at Blood Diner from 1987!

How the hell did Leigh end up becoming obsessed with this film without having ever seen it?

What in the hell is this movie? Like, seriously where do we even begin with it?

We get into how this is very much a product of the 80s and how making a movie this off the wall would be a challenge now.

We try to break the 7000 different things going on in this movie, and if any of it works at all

We talk about the characters and whether or not there is anyone at all you are meant to root for in this film.

We each give our own personal thoughts on cannibalism and the use of it in films and how it's depicted here.

All of this and lots more in this fun, wild episode. Press that play button now and Hail Sheetar!

Find us on Social Media:

Twitter: SIMAHFPOD

Instagram: soimarriedahorrorfan

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[aviculor]

Blood Diner, a cheesy horror comedy from '87. I was going to watch it a few weeks ago but I chose American Werewolf in London instead because I was afraid of losing my appetite watching something food-centered.

The film opens with a crazed maniac on the loose hacking down the front door of a house with a cleaver, and the two kids inside excitedly greet him as their uncle. It only gets wackier from there.

It's no masterpiece, but I was prepared for dumb fun. I don't know how a film could possibly take itself seriously with a premise like this. Unless, I suppose, if the whole "Egyptian Goddess cultist" angle was a reveal in the last act a la Hereditary, but this is not that by a long shot. It's balls-to-the-wall zany and goofy black comedy and it does not pretend to be anything else. You know what you're getting into from the first few minutes alone. It's just a shame I had to turn closed captions off because they are not synced to the dialogue whatsoever on any site I've tried.

[zombiesun]

I just wanted to watch blood diner (1987) and finish my commission today but I cannot find a workable link for it anywhere

[igaveuponlifealongtimeago]

[head-vampire]

Blood Diner (1987)

Art by C. Winston Taylor

Source

[halloweenhundreds]

Welp. Now I’ve seen Blood Diner.

[chloesimaginationthings]

FNAF: Trauma of the Afton children

[lets-steal-an-archive]

Because we the people deserve it:

https://archive.org/details/vampires-kiss-1988-undated-unspecified

Oh this is one of our most important cultural artifacts.