#blonde little devil. ( Alison )

[werepuppy-steve]

gay pirate brianrot (our flag means death)

just straight up vibes, mate

the chain - fleetwood mac

sweet creature - harry styles

could have been me - the struts

here i go again - whitesnake

love is gone (acoustic) - SLANDER, dylan matthew

let me follow - son lux

achilles come down - gang of youths

till forever falls apart - ashe, FINNEAS

i found - amber run

achilles heel - j. maya

pierre - ryn weaver

partners in crime - set it off, ashe costello

motion sickness - phoebe bridgers

arms unfolding - dodie

sea of love - cat power

hello hello - elton john

ready now - dodie

love like you - caleb hayes

this will be (an everlasting love) - natalie cole

abcdefu (angrier) - GAYLE

would you go with me - josh turner

if i ain't got you - alicia keys

ship in a bottle - fin

underground - cody fry

one (mono single version) - harry nilsson

simply the best - billianne

miss missing you - fall out boy

burn butcher burn - joey batey

in case you don't live forever - ben platt

never love an anchor - the crane wives

inkpot gods - the amazing devil

ruin - the amazing devil

i guess i'm in love - clinton kane

chicken tendies - clinton kane

like real people do - hozier

seven - taylor swift

our prayer - the beach boys

hallucinogenics - matt maeson

crazy on you - heart

locomotive breath - jethro tull

high on a rocky ledge - moondog

messa da requiem: 2. dies irae - guiseppe verdi, berliner philharmoniker, carlo maria guilini, ernst senff chor

sonata in e major, k. 380 - domenico scarlatti, khatia buniatishvili

gnossienne no. 5: modéré - erik satie, olga scheps

concerto for recorder and viola dagamba in a minor, twv 52:a1: I.grave - georg philipp telemann, hille perl

II triello - ennio morricone

perfect day - lou reed

träumerei (kinderderszenen, op. 15) - robert schumann, ronny matthes

2 arabesques, l. 66: no. 1 in e major - claude debusy, peter frankl

rêverie, l. 68: rêverie - claude debussy, jean-yves thibaudet

avalanche - leonard cohen

miles from nowhere - yusuf / cat stevens

go to hell - clinton kane

back to december - taylor swift

mine - taylor swift

break my stride - matthew wilder

viva la vida - coldplay

blackbeard's ghost - jesse rice

back to black - amy winehouse

change (in the house of flies) - deftones

we'll never have sex - leith ross

make up your mind - florence + the machine

everybody loves me - onerepublic

the captain's daughter - alison krauss & union station

easy on me - adele

hoist up the thing - the longest johns

gimme! gimme! gimme! (a man after midnight) - abba

right where you left me - taylor swift

super trouper - abba

soldier, poet, king - the oh hellos

raise hell - brandi carlile

ocean blue - moniker

no choir - florence + the machine

leggie blonde - flight of the conchords

little lion man - mumford & sons

rolling in the deep - adele

pirate song - ben barnes

i love you like an alcoholic - the taxpayers

hello my old heart - the oh hellos

a pirate's life - joel fry

to death we go - joel fry

hurts like hell - fleurie, tommee profitt

lay all your love on me - abba

judas - lady gaga

the moon will sing - the crane wives

this side of paradise - coyote theory

shrike - hozier

enchanted - taylor swift

the night we met - lord huron

dear wormwood - the oh hellos

iris - the goo goo dolls

favorite crime - olivia rodrigo

the foundations of decay - my chemical romance

curses - the crane wives

matilda - harry styles

if i could fly - one direction

welcome home, son - radical face

the mary ellen carter - the longest johns

sweet disposition - the temper trap

like ships need the sea - emily hearn

[queerstuffonscreen]

Pretty Little Liars (2010-2017) [I]

Episode length: 40-45 min.

Country: USA

Genre: Drama, Mystery

Language: English

Based on the Pretty Little Liars series of young adult novels by Sara Shepard, the series follows the lives of four girls — Spencer, Hanna, Aria, and Emily — whose clique falls apart after the disappearance of their queen bee, Alison. One year later, they begin receiving messages from someone using the name "A" who threatens to expose their secrets — including long-hidden ones they thought only Alison knew.

Season 1

Episode 1: Pilot

Episode 2: The Jenna Thing

Episode 3: To Kill a Mocking Girl

Episode 4: Can You Hear Me Now?

Episode 5: Reality Bites Me

Episode 6: There's No Place Like Homecoming

Episode 7: The Homecoming Hangover

Episode 8: Please, Do Talk About Me When I'm Gone

Episode 9: The Perfect Storm

Episode 10: Keep Your Friends Close

Episode 11: Moments Later

Episode 12: Salt Meets Wound

Episode 13: Know Your Frenemies

Episode 14: Careful What U Wish 4

Episode 15: If at First You Don't Succeed, Lie, Lie Again

Episode 16: Je Suis Une Amie

Episode 17: The New Normal

Episode 18: The Bad Seed

Episode 19: A Person of Interest

Episode 20: Someone to Watch Over Me

Episode 21: Monsters in the End

Episode 22: For Whom the Bell Tolls

Season 2

Episode 1: It's Alive

Episode 2: The Goodbye Look

Episode 3: My Name Is Trouble

Episode 4: Blind Dates

Episode 5: The Devil You Know

Episode 6: Never Letting Go

Episode 7: Surface Tension

Episode 8: Save the Date

Episode 9: Picture This

Episode 10: Touched by an A-ngel

Episode 11: I Must Confess

Episode 12: Over My Dead Body

Episode 13: The First Secret

Episode 14: Through Many Dangers, Toils and Snares

Episode 15: A Hot Piece of 'A'

Episode 16: Let the Water Hold Me Down

Episode 17: Blond Leading the Blind

Episode 18: A Kiss Before Lying

Episode 19: The Naked Truth

Episode 20: CTRL:A

Episode 21: Breaking the Code

Episode 22: Father Knows Best

Episode 23: Eye of the Beholder

Episode 24: If These Dolls Could Talk

Episode 25: UnmAsked

Season 3

Episode 1: It Happened 'That Night'

Episode 2: Blood is the New Black

Episode 3: Kingdom of the Blind

Episode 4: Birds of a Feather

Episode 5: That Girl Is Poison

Episode 6: The Remains of the 'A'

Episode 7: Crazy

Episode 8: Stolen Kisses

Episode 9: The Kahn Game

Episode 10: What Lies Beneath

Episode 11: Single Fright Female

Episode 12: The Lady Killer

Episode 13: This is a Dark Ride

Episode 14: She's Better Now

Episode 15: Mona Mania

Episode 16: Misery Loves Company

Episode 17: Out of the Frying Pan, Into the Inferno

Episode 18: Dead to Me

Episode 19: What Becomes of the Broken Hearted

Episode 20: Hot Water

Episode 21: Out of Sight, Out of Mind

Episode 22: Will the Circle Be Unbroken?

Episode 23: I'm Your Puppet

Episode 24: A DAngerous GAme

Season 4

Episode 1: 'A' is for A-l-i-v-e

Episode 2: Turn of the Shoe

Episode 3: Cat's Cradle

Episode 4: Face Time

Episode 5: Gamma Zeta Die!

Episode 6: Under the Gun

Episode 7: Crash and Burn, Girl!

Episode 8: The Guilty Girl's Handbook

Episode 9: Into the Deep

Episode 10: The Mirror Has Three Faces

Episode 11: Bring Down the Hoe

Episode 12: Now You See Me, Now You Don't

Episode 13: Grave New World

Episode 14: Who's in the Box?

Episode 15: Love ShAck, Baby

Episode 16: Close Encounters

Episode 17: Bite Your Tongue

Episode 18: Hot for Teacher

Episode 19: Shadow Play

Episode 20: Free Fall

Episode 21: She's Come Undone

Episode 22: Cover for Me

Episode 23: Unbridled

Episode 24: 'A' is for Answers

Watch on HBO Max or Hulu

See Pretty Little Liars post II season 5-7

[therecordchanger62279]

THE HALLOWEEN MASTER PLAYLIST

Halloween is my favorite holiday, and listening to some spooky music and watching horror films is mandatory if you’re really going to get into the spirit of the thing. (I eat candy, and dress like a hobo year-round, so that part of it was a given.) So I thought I’d post a master playlist of seasonal music a few weeks early in case any of you wanted to put something together for your own enjoyment, or maybe a Halloween party you might be planning.

Thinking outside the box (or coffin, if you prefer) I managed to do it without using Monster Mash or The Purple People Eater. But, there are roughly a hundred titles here, and I promise you if you turn down the lights, and close your eyes when you begin listening to it, you’ll have turned every light in the house back on, and double-locked every door.

Happy haunting.

Halloween Theme (Main Title) – John Carpenter

Alison Gross – Steeleye Span

Black Magic Woman – Santana

Black Sabbath – Black Sabbath

Bloodletting (The Vampire Song) – Concrete Blonde

Black Night – Deep Purple

Dancing With Mr. D. – Rolling Stones

(Don’t Fear) The Reaper – Blue Oyster Cult

The Ghost – Fleetwood Mac

Jekyll and Hyde – Renaissance

Knife Edge – Emerson, Lake & Palmer

L’America – The Doors

Rainbow Demon – Uriah Heep

Runnin’ With The Devil – Van Halen

Witchy Woman – The Eagles

Welcome To My Nightmare – Alice Cooper

Witch’s Promise – Jethro Tull

Tubular Bells (Opening Theme) – Mike Oldfield

Bad Moon Rising – Creedence Clearwater Revival

Burn – Deep Purple

The Creature From The Black Lagoon – Dave Edmunds

Frankenstein – Edgar Winter Group

Ghost Town – The Specials

Headless Cross – Black Sabbath

Hungry Wolf – X

Marquee Moon – Television

Moon Over Bourbon Street – Sting

Rhiannon – Fleetwood Mac

Scary Monsters (and Super Creeps) – David Bowie

The Super-Natural – John Mayall & The Bluesbreakers

Voodoo Child (Slight Return) – Jimi Hendrix Experience

Werewolves of London – Warren Zevon

The Wizard – Black Sabbath

The Witch Queen of New Orleans – Redbone

Dark Shadows Theme/Collinwood - Robert Cobert Orchestra

The Shadow Knows – Link Wray & His Wraymen

Billy The Monster – The Deviants

I Want Candy – The Strangeloves

Spooky – Classics IV

Crimson Witch – The Moving Sidewalks

Psychotic Reaction – Count Five

She Lives (In A Time of Her Own) – 13th Floor Elevators

Fire Poem – The Crazy World of Arthur Brown

Fire – The Crazy World of Arthur Brown

The Witch – The Sonics

Tombstone Shadow – Creedence Clearwater Revival

Sympathy For The Devil – Rolling Stones

Children of the Grave - Black Sabbath

Jack The Ripper / The Black Widow - Link Wray

Mr. Crowley / Bark At The Moon - Ozzy Osbourne

Riders On The Storm - The Doors

Lock Up The Wolves - Dio

Distant Ghost - Del Shannon

Might Just Take Your Life - Deep Purple

There's No Way Out of Here / Murder - David Gilmour

I'd Swear There Was Somebody Here - David Crosby

We Are The Dead - David Bowie

I Scare Myself - Dan Hicks & His Hot Licks

Run Through The Jungle - Creedence Clearwater Revival

Prelude-Nightmare - The Crazy World of Arthur Brown

Don't Put No Headstone On My Grave - Charlie Rich

I'm Your Witchdoctor - Chants R&B

Sway - Carla Olson & Mick Taylor

Evil - Cactus

The Jezebel Spirit - Brian Eno & David Byrne

Black Night - Bob Seger

Man In The Long Black Coat / The Wicked Messenger - Bob Dylan

I Love The Night / Hot Rails To Hell - Blue Oyster Cult

Sabbath Bloody Sabbath / Electric Funeral / Lady Evil / The Devil Cried / Devil and Daughter / Evil Eye - Black Sabbath

Black Cat Moan - Beck, Bogert & Appice

Red Temple Prayer (Two Headed Dog) - The Barracudas

Devil In My Car - The B 52's

Devil's Answer - Atomic Rooster

Sign of the Gypsy Queen - April Wine

The Four Horsemen - Aphrodite's Child

Black Hearted Woman - Allman Brothers Band

I Put A Spell On You / Little Demon - Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Evil Ways - Santana

Evil Hearted You - The Yardbirds

Evil Woman - Doobie Brothers

Evil Woman - Spooky Tooth

Evil - Edgar Broughton Band

Black Cadillac - Joyce Green

Black Angel's Death Song - Velvet Underground

Angel of Death / Raining Blood / Silent Scream / Spill The Blood / Hell Awaits / Death's Head - Slayer

[sleepydrownedrat]

So I actually did this in complete darkness in a notebook, but after spending several straight hours poring over my tome and trying to decipher the unintelligible scrawlings I made while incredibly sleep-deprived and without light, I've got it! I've pieced together my rough plotting of a Saw musical from 1 to 3D!

Fair warning I got a bit more sleepy at the end so there was a lot less in terms of ideas for 6 & 7, but I've got story beats and song titles down, and it'll be under the cut

John - Non-singing role/may also play Billy (Baritone with Soprano notes here an there)

Amanda - Lower Range Alto

Hoffman - Low Tenor

Lawrence - Tenor

Adam - High Tenor reaching Low Alto

Eric - Low Tenor

Daniel - Tenor

Obi - Bass

Kerry - High Soprano down to low Baritone notes

Rough Plot Outline

Acts separated into one part per movie*

*Saw 3/4 take place at the same time in the same part

ACT 1 - Saw 1-3/technically also 4

Part 1-Saw 1

Just Two Guys in a Bathroom (And We're Not Gay)

- Adam and Lawrence wake up and get acquainted to their surroundings, featuring a solo by Billy from the tapes (OH NO HE'S HOT!)

- They speak to each other afterwards

We've been Jigged

- Lawrence tells Adam about how this has happened before (Mandy, Jelly Guy, Razor Wire Maze) 

- Use the upper bits of Proscenium stage like the fuckin uh little rooms up there for the cutaways to other traps

Reverse Bear Trap Interlude I: Amanda

- Mandy in the middle - have her part the set somehow between the sluts 

- Lawrence tries to get Adam to look for clues

Follow Your Heart

- Lawrence, it says we need to have gay sex that's what my heart says - Adam gets electrocuted

- Short song about Adam being gay

Talking

- Afterwards he searches the toilet SAW 

- Yum Wall Cigarettes let's poison Adam

- Zap

- Zep in one of the little rooms up there has Diana and Alison and goes to shoot but is interrupted by Tapp

SAW (2004)ING MY FOOT OFF

- Lawrence saw 2004s his foot off and crawls away, while Adam begs for him to not, even after he was just shot by Lawrence

- Crawls off

- Game Over

Just Two Guys In A Bathroom (Reprise)

- Adam is Just One Guy In A Bathroom in the dark angsty 

- Lawrence returns to find Adam presumed dead, sobs and cries

- Is Adam alive? Find out next time on Dragonball Z because I don't know which I like more

Part 2-Saw 2

Eric Matthews is Having a Bad Day

- Look Closer Eric Matthews (probably beter title)

- Wow that man just got Jigged

- To the Metal Place

- Gasping sounds it's Jiggy S

Talking

- Eric Matthews talks to John, finds out son is "currently" being Jigged

- Be me

- Eric Matthews

- Son is being Jigged

- Sadness.jpg

I Want to go Home

- The Nerve Toxin House people want to go home, with another Billy solo

- Ends dramatically with the Magnum Eyehole going off

Talking

- Where are we conversation

- Oh my goodness we're being Jigged 

- Daniel Matthews is the smartest kid alive

- Man this key is useless it goes to nothing

- Hey what's this panel

Not Even The Devil Can Help You

- Furnace Trap

Talking

- Eric Matthews interrogates John about his son

- Beats the man up, gets in car

- Back to the house, Needle Pit Trap and Xander is an idiot

- Blonde lady dies rip I love her

- Father and Son

- Split up, Razor Box Trap if I have to, Xander tries to get the numbers (maybe during an instrumental overture sort of thing)

- Into the bathroom

[I could not make out the song title for the life of me but it was probably something clever]

- Eric arrives at the scene while Mandy/Daniel slaughter Xander

- OH NO IT WAS PRE RECORDED

- GASP

- Eric Matthews gets Jigged Part 1

Part 3-Saw 3/4

The Angel Trap

- Play it completely straight/no comedy

- Have this take the place of the Classroom trap because this is cooler and this is way too long already (may need to bring up Kerry earlier/make her part of Eric's team in Part 2)

Talking

- Hoffman, Rigg, Perez, and Strahm find her soon after, find out that there must have been more than one Jigsaw buddy and that it may have been rigged

- Cherish Your Life

Collar Me

- Lynn and Amanda sing about being lesbian and having crazy gay sex

- Shotgun Collar

- Amanda explains the trap

- Heart rate dictates tempo/rhythm (when it speeds up we go into brain surgery mode)

- Amanda gives John top surgery

- Fully ignore Jeff because he sucks and probably smells like axe body spray he only comes in at the end

Talking

- Smash cut to Saw 4, Rigg is having a lovely shower while passed out and wakes up to find the scalping trap lady

Jigged? More like Rigged

- Oscillating between Rigg's games (scalping, divorce trap, bedroom) and the Lesbians, Perez gets shot by Billy with another Billy solo, have Jeff come in for exactly one line as he tries to take the spotlight and fails

Talking

- Strahm interviews Jill, who briefly mentions a mysterious box before shutting up

- Iconic Strahm 

Talking

- Lynn and Mandy converse over John's sleeping body

- Strahm enters the building following Rigg

Bloody Valentine

- Lynn is infatuated with Mandy, Mandy starts to lose her control over the situation ("I'll kill her soon, I promise" or something- she is conflicted)

- They are broken up by Jeff, who shoots Amanda through Lynn

- Jeff saw (2004)s John 

Put Some Ice On It

- Timer ticks down, Strahm follows Rigg, Rigg runs, Strahm gets lost and follows the gunshot, Strahm shoots Jeff and Eric shoots Rigg at the same time, but it's too late

- His head is smashed, Art is killed by his trap, Rigg dies painfully, Hoffman lives 

- Big Group Number

- Game Over

ACT 2

Part 4-Saw 5

Put Him In The Cube I

- Strahm wakes up in the cube

- He panics

- Finally he Tracheotomies himself

- Hoffman finds him not dead and has a gay awakening

Talking

- Hoffman and Strahm escape as Rigg's backup arrives, they take the child out

- Hoffman and Strahm have an old married couple spat that doesn't get far as Strahm can't talk much

- Strahm has an even gayer awakening

Why penetrate your own neck when you could penetrate me instead?

- Hoffman and Strahm argue in a homoerotic fashion

- Healing at the Hospital

10 Pints of Sacrifice

- Fatal Five Trap real quick, Brit and Mallick are straight for each other and die in each others arms at the end of the song

Talking

- Erickson finds Strahm's belongings at the scene of the Fatal 5, calls for backup/investigation of Strahm

- Hoffman and Strahm continue to be gay for each other as Hoffman is tailed to the nerve gas house (each having separate gay panicking episodes)

Put Him In The Cube II

- COFFINSHIPPING SCENE

- Hoffstrahm duet

- Strahm gets crushed

- a Valentine falls from his pocket addressed to Hoffman and it's something super cheesy like "I Have a Crush on You" or something and put the autism creature on it too

- Hoffman laments 

Part 5-Saw 6

All The Uses For a Hand

- Hoffman goes around with Strahm's hand, placing prints places and showing off all the uses for a disembodied hand

- Stopped halfway through so he can be told about the whole "Mark this hand is dead" thing before he decides to slaughter everyone including Perez after learning she's alive and setting the world ablaze and continuing his jovial ballad about his dead boyfriend's hand

Talking

- Jill opens the box, pulling out the Bear Trap

Reverse Bear Trap Interlude II: They got a real bear in it this time

- Jill puts Hoffman in the trap but he escapes because he's a girlboss

Part 6-Saw 3D - Fín

A Weird Marketing Strategy

- PUBLICSHIPPING SCENE

- WE DEM BOYS

- The gay boys break up with the lady and escape a lot gayer for one another

Talking

- Gay

I don't care about Bobby Dagen any more than I care about William so we're skipping those 

Rondo of Gore (or something I'm tired)

- Viennese Waltz inspired song

- Jill goes to the police about Hoffman

- Ignore the dream sequence/maybe turn it into a Dance Break w/ Jill/Hoffman (but threateningly and violent and not romantic)

- Speed up into the end

- BIG GROUP NUMBER

- MORE JOIN WITH MORE SPEED

Reverse Bear Trap Interlude III: Jill 

- Bear Trap :D

- Quick different styling here

Back to the Rondo song

- Lawrence and Publicshipping boys put Hoffman in the bathroom

- Just Two Guys In A Bathroom Reprise/Callback Thing as the Public boys smooch

- Adam meets Lawrence in the bathroom and they also smooch or something gay like that

- Throw a bone to the lesbians and bring Mandy and Lynn back too because why not 

- Britt and Mallick are still way dead though

- Fade to black

Done now :D

Thinking about that time I woke up in a cold sweat at 3 in the morning and plotted out an entire Saw musical through 3D only to find out that there is a Saw Parody musical already touring the US the next day.

[americanoemmy]

🌊🌊🌊🌊

[arctimon]

The Beta Team That Never Was - Fanfiction Corner (BH6 Edition)

So all of this Peni Parker comic talk actually got me thinking about the process of her being included in my fanfiction.

I wish I could tell you it was a long and arduous process, but...

OK, maybe some of it was hard.  But when you have a virtually endless supply of Marvel characters that you can use for possible teammates for Big Hero 6, you have to go with your gut.

We all know that the team will be Robbie, Aspen, Peni, Doreen (eventually), and Kate.  But there were six other candidates that could have been in the mix as well.

And five of them have their emblems here:

These were made before I actually knew how to make hero emblems properly.

Some of them you might recognize.  Some you may not.  But we’re going to go through them all, from left to right.

And to start...it’s really hard to draw tiny hearts.

1.) Riri Williams/Ironheart - Ironically enough, it was around the time that Hiro started chasing Sirque around the town in “Portal Enemy” that I started brainstorming her.  A teenage genius, stuck as to what to make, sees “Captain Cutie” and the chase on the news and gets brainstorming.

Thus, the Power Armor is born.

And she gets so excited that she bolts off to San Fransokyo to show her idol what she’s created.

And then, as per the Big Hero 6 Fanfiction Clause states...shenanigans ensue.

It was an interesting possibility, but the thought of Ironheart was really late into me doing the backstories of the people that I had chosen, so she was pushed aside.  I don’t personally see me revisiting her in the future, but who knows?

2.) Nadia Van Dyne/The Wasp - Back when Karmi had first been pulled out of SFIT, there was a young woman who wanted to recruit her into a special organization.  It was one that brought together the greatest female minds in their fields, and Karmi was on said recruitment list.

The organization?

Genius In action Research Labs, or G.I.R.L. for short.  And it was led by the Wasp’s daughter, Nadia Pym (later changed to Nadia Van Dyne).

Plot-wise, this was probably the person that I got the farthest with, since the story would’ve been more of a focus on Karmi than anyone else.  Also, the idea of writing someone with Bipolar Disorder (which Nadia was confirmed to have in her latest solo run) was intriguing if nothing else.

Unfortunately, it sort of dried up from there.  A lack of a central conflict, uncertainty as to how many of the other girls (Taina, Priya, Shay, and Ying) to have, and how to handle her actual powers stopped it cold.

But seriously, how do you write in the ability to shrink to microscopic size?  That’s not really a thing, even in a world as futuristic as San Fransokyo.

3.) America Chavez/Ms. America - The mere idea of a Superman-esque Latina teenager was enticing, especially because America, in her relatively short comic history, was with the Ultimates and the West Coast Avengers (meaning there was a possible Kate/Hawkeye angle).  Making start-shaped portals was the Silent Sparrow angle, and the all-around badass, headstrong attitude would be the counter to Honey Lemon’s more nurturing personality.

But being from an alternate universe (which has very recently been retconned in the comics in part because she will be appearing in the MCU and Doctor Strange 2), no real villain to play off of, and becoming possibly way too overpowered for the BH6 universe, she was scrapped.

It’s quite a shame.  I really like her in the comics that she’s in.  Perhaps there will be an opportunity for her somewhere down the line...

4.) Alison Blaire/Dazzler - A pop star with light-based powers?

Or better yet, a struggling artist with acoustikinesis?

Her power to convert sound into light was what originally drew me to her.  Something that could be made into a technological ability, unique enough to put a (pardon the pun) spotlight on it.

An actual blonde instead of whatever HL’s hair color is.

Heck, she even has a half-sister named Lois that could have been the antagonist (death tough, destruction waves, and the like).

But she quickly got lost in the fold.  Better ideas (like Kate and Doreen) got more of my brainstorming, and she was eventually given up on.

But funnily enough...

It’s almost like she’s already in the show.

(See, for the people who may be new, one of the many Marvel theories that I’ve touched upon is that High Voltage is actually this universe’s version of Dazzler.  Juniper is Alison and Barb is...well...Barbara London, Alison’s mom).

Hey, @baymaksu​ totally agrees with me kinda sort of.

5.) Cindy Moon/Silk - I knew right from the get-go that I wanted a Spider-person on the beta team.  I also knew that I didn’t want Peter.

No offense to Peter Parker.  He’s fine.  But there’s a billion other Spiders out there, and I wanted someone out of the normal vein of Peter, as well as even Miles and Gwen.

And in came Cindy.

Locked away in The Bunker because of her spider powers manifesting, she was eventually released by Peter and thus began her entrance into the main Marvel world.

Her “unique ability” is her improved Spider-Sense, which Peter has said is even better than his own.  That, plus her other powers, brought her the closest out of anyone to being a member of the Big Hero 6 Beta Team.

As we all know, however, Peni ended up getting the spot over Cindy (for the family angle with Hiro and the giant robot that she pilots).  On the other hand, Cindy would later make her debut in the stinger of the last chapter of Along Came The S.P.I.D.E.R., along with Miles, Anya, and Joey.

Unlike Riri, Nadia, America, and Alison, Cindy and the rest of Peni’s little Spider Society are going to be showing up in future stories.  And if I can get everything in order, they will be starring in their own story set in the Big Hero 6 universe.

Finally, I have no emblem for them, but the honorable mention goes to...

6.) Lunella Lafayette/Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur - Yes, there was a point in time where I was seriously considering putting a nine-year-old super genius and a giant red T-rex into my stories.

Ignoring the giant...”red flag” here, the reason why Luna never made it is the same reason why I haven’t put Rishi in anything yet.  It’s because I don’t really know what to do with supergeniuses that young.  Hiro is at least a teenager and thus has teenager-y problems to fall back on (like puberty and Karmi and all that jazz), but a nine-year-old?  That’s a little too extreme for me.

When I was nine, I was busy playing with sticks in my backyard with my brother, not solving unsolvable puzzles from Bruce Banner.

...All that, and the giant dinosaur.

But hey, at least Disney is jumping on the MG/DD train.  That’s good to see.

Crossover potential, perhaps?

P.S. - As I was finishing putting this post together, it occurred to me that I may get this possible question in the comments, so I’m going to head it off at the pass.

“You know that all of your possible superheroes are girls, right?”

First of all...sexist.

Second of all...true.

That was about 90% on accident.  The actual team (Robbie, Aspen, Peni, Doreen, and Kate) has only one guy on it (two if you count Eli, three if you count Tippy-Toe).

I don’t really have a good explanation for that.  I like all superheroes, but I think that the girl and woman superheroes need some spotlight, you know?  I could have pulled people like Namor or Miles or the male Hawkeye into the mix, but to be honest, I find the characters I chose more interesting than a lot of the guy characters I was contemplating.

Of course, nothing is stopping any of you from using those characters in your stories.  Be my guest, not that you really need my permission or anything.

But you can’t take Aspen.  Aspen is mine. (Spoiler: Aspen is not mine.)

[jemej3m]

Devil wears Prada pt2 where Nicky or Matt or Alison or smth give Neil a makeover and Andrew is Too Gay For This Shit

mmMMmmmMMMmMmM

*

“He hates me,” Neil insisted, leaning his hip against Kevin’s focus board. The man was busy sorting out different approaches to the spring release, of which Nicky had been nagging on about all week. 

Kevin hummed, ignoring Neil completely. 

“I don’t want his validation,” Neil continued. “I just - we all work hard here. Harder than he does! And he gets all the credit?”

“You’re being melodramatic.” 

Neil just huffed. “Well, what do I do?”

Kevin shrugged. “Andrew chooses who he listens to. You need to prove that your ideas are worth his time.” The man glanced up, giving Neil’s outfit a derogatory once-over. “And you’re going to get nowhere, looking like that.”

Neil looked down at himself. “I look fine.”

“You’re the secretary for the forerunner of the most lucrative fashion editorial that’s ever graced the planet, wearing Goodwill jeans and shoes that have superglue seeping out from the soles. Fix it.”

Neil just flipped him off, storming out of Kevin’s office. The man went back to his concept arrangements with little more than a roll of his eyes. 

*

Before Neil could reach his desk the next morning, a hand wrapped around his wrist and tugged him sideways. 

A blonde woman stood head and shoulders taller than him, grinning fiendishly. “Hello, Neil.” 

“Hello,” Neil allowed, taking a step back. “Do I know you?”

She flicked her hair over her shoulder. “Kevin gave me full reign over the sample closets with an order to teach you how to look less...like that.”

“You just gestured to all of me?”

“Well, yeah.” She pinched his cheek. “My name’s Allison. Model, entrepreneur, fabulous bitch and your saviour. Now, shall we?”

“Minyard will be arriving soon -” Neli argued as she towed him down the corridor. 

“Kevin excused you for the morning,” she winked. “Appreciate it, I think. Now, where do we start? Underwear, presumably. Wait! Let’s tackle that mop of hair on your head.” 

Neil just gulped. 

*

Andrew was mildly pissed off. Kevin had excused the haggerty brat of a secretary from work for the morning and refused to disclose why: even Nicky had kept his mouth shut, typing away quietly at his desk. It meant  Andrrew’s coffee was late and his scheduling wasn’t printed out in the format that he liked. He hadn’t even realised that Josten had picked up on that detail, which only served to piss him off even more. He was deathly busy: he had no time to be thinking about the likes of Neil Josten, his train-wreck of a secretary. 

“I expect you to catch up on all this,” Andrew heard Kevin say. 

“Do you take me for an amateur? I’ve already sorted out everything on this list,” Neil Josten retorted, shoving the clipboard back into Kevin’s chest. Kevin stayed by Nicky’s desk as Neil waltzed through into Andrew’s office without knocking. 

Andrew couldn’t help but stare.

“I know you would’ve suffered through one of those bitter, watery espresso shots this morning,” his assistant said, placing down Andrew’s favourite coffee order on a coaster than Aaron had bought him. He then dropped down two books. “Here’s the manuscripts that you ordered for your niece and nephew, the most recent copy of the Palmetto edition unedited, and your correspondences. I’ll have you know that a Kengo Moriyama has asked you to an event, so I retorted with a scathingly professional rebuke. I’ve printed out the response for you to peruse, since I know you actually think it’s amusing -”

“Who dressed you?” Andrew demanded. 

Neil looked down at himself. He was wearing black slacks that clung to his legs and glossy Dolce dress shoes. A midnight-blue velvet blazer was kept open over a white blouse that had a lace overlay, tucked into his trousers and extenuating an incredibly slim waist. 

His hair was clipped and artfully curled. Worst of all were the smudges of eyeliner at the corners of his eyes, the blue irises outshining every Cerulean jewel. 

“Allison toyed with me slightly,” he admitted. 

Of course. Allison.

Andrew hummed, ignoring the poignant thrashing of his heart against his ribcage. “Out.” 

Neil, inexplicably, grinned. With a two fingered salute, he left Andrew’s office, shutting the glass doors behind him. 

Andrew tugged his cigarettes out from the bottom drawer of his desk, staring out at the landscape of New York City as the hour chugged by, ignoring every call and knock on his door. 

Fucking dammit. 

[americanoemmy]

@ofthequeenofmean

That’s why I love you.

[smokeybrandreviews]

Smokey brand Movie Reviews: A Real Kick in the Cunt

A while back, i saw this weirdly overproduced trailer for a flick call Promising Young Woman between Youtube videos and thought it looked interesting. I expected it to be kind of wonky. It felt like this sh*t should have went the way of, say, Terminal but i watched that so i figured why not watch this, too. I was intrigued by the look of the film and, after researching it a bit, found myself enthralled with the plot. In a year where the movie pickings are mad slim, will Promising Young Woman deliver?

The Good

Immediately, the music to this film hits you like a ton of bricks. You can tell that this soundtrack is going to be an intricate aspect of this cinematic experience. From the second that Charli XCX remix hits over those credits, you knew this was going to be an entire situation and i was totally down for it. This flick did not disappoint from that perspective.

I love the whole visual of this film. The way the camera frames everything, the saturation of color, the almost surreal nature of the visuals; They all coalesce into a real feast for the eyes. There is a very distinct presentation displayed and it feels as unique as a film like Atomic Blonde or Terminal. I kind of really love it.

Bro, i love this cast, man. It’s kind of amazing. Alison Brie, Clancy Brown, Jennifer Coolidge, Laverne Cox, Connie Britton, Molly Shannon, Alfred Molina, Adam Brody, Alex Greenfield and Christopher Mintz-Plasse. Like, this thing is straight up loaded to the gills with that star talent. I mean, they even got McLovin in on the action and none of them disappoint. That said, this is definitely Carey Mulligan’s movie.

There is a level of chemistry that runs through every performance in this film. It’s actually preppy palpable. It enriches the very core of this film and makes each relationship feel incredibly authentic.

Carey Mulligan turns in an amazing performance as the lead, Cassie Thomas. She feels like an extension of such violent heroines as Asami Yamazaki from Audition or Jen from Revenge. Cassie is intelligent, calculating, captivating, amazingly charismatic, and terrifyingly sinister. There is a real, underlying, malevolence to Cassie and i ate it all up. Mulligan delivers this with such precision, it’s unnerving.

Bo Burnham was lovely in his role as the love interest, Ryan Cooper. He has this awkward, earnest, energy that s the perfect counter to the abject disdain that Mulligan festers. Dude has some stand out scenes that really show his range as an actor. Dude is one of the best of his generation, Eight Grade showed us that, and that excellence carries over to this role, too. I’m looking forward to what he does next.

Emerald Fennell really directs her ass of in this thing. I’m familiar with her work from Killing Eve, another excellent work, chock full of that potent female energy, and i loved that, too. I really enjoyed the look of this film, the feel of this presentation. There is a distinct passion behind the camera, like she knows this story and absolutely needs to tell it. That makes sense because she also wrote the thing. Definitely an auteur creator in the making. Considering this is literally Fennell’s directorial debut, i have to say, she has a bright future ahead of her.

I have to say, the pacing of this film is pretty brisk. It’s about seven minutes shy of two hours but never actually feels that way. Again, the deft touch from Fennell is definitely on display. One of the pitfalls of freshman directors is wonky pacing, most take a film or two to find that sweet spot, but Ferrell seems to have a handle on it out the gate.

The Okay

The plot isn’t rally anything new. It’s your basic revenge story with a bleaker ending than most but the devil is in the details. The strength of this narrative lies in the performances and the presentation. You’ve definitely seen this story told before, and probably better, but never like this. Assassination Nation and I Spit On Your Grave are similar takes on this type of plot. While the story being told is rather cliche to the point of being a sub-genre in it’s own right, how this trope is told makes for a great experience.

This thing is definitely a Carey Mulligan vehicle. That’s not a bad thing, per say, but the rest of this cast was amazing and we don’t get enough time with them. Alfred Molina and Laverne Cox steal every scene they’re in and i just wanted a little more time with them. Alas, it was not to be...

The Verdict

I really liked this movie, man. It is one of the best I've seen this year. One of but not the best. Promising Young Woman is gorgeous in every way that counts, with one of the strongest lead performances from Carey Mulligan i have ever seen her give. The direction is on point and the cinematography is absolutely stunning. Like, i really enjoy this camera work, man. The supporting cast is chock full of heavy-weights and they bring as much energy and believability to their roles as Mulligan. The only real downside is the fact that this story is a little cliche in the cinematic zeitgeist but what narratives aren’t? Is this flick perfect? No. But it is fun, engaging, and entertaining If you have the opportunity to check it out, definitely watch Promising Young Woman It dd not disappoint.

[americanoemmy]

@ofthequeenofmean

TOP 100 SHIPS OF ALL TIME: #51. emily fields and alison dilaurentis (pretty little liars)

[kayliemusing]

30

1: Name - Kaylie

2: Age - 23

3: 3 Fears - Spiders, failure, loss

4: 3 things I love - Reading, writing, Taylor Swift

5: 4 turns on - Kindness, nice hands, humor, someone who has a really warm heart.

6: 4 turns off - Arrogance, moustaches lmao, narcissism, basket ball shorts *shudders*

7: My best friend - Her name is Megan (but also my mom lmao)

8: Sexual orientation - Heterosexual

9: My best first date - I have never been on a date.

10: How tall am I - 5'2

11: What do I miss - My childhood mostly

12: What time were I born - 2:45 pm

13: Favorite color - Red, but sometimes a nice summery, pastel yellow

14: Do I have a crush - no

15: Favorite quote - I have so many that I can't say my utmost favourite, but one that I always think about is from Richard Siken "He was pointing at the moon but I was looking at his hand." I'm not even sure how this is supposed to be interpreted, but I just love the detail of this. Of someone looking at the moon and pointing at it, but you're looking at their hand because you're that consumed by them and also they're like your moon. anyway-

16: Favorite place - My house lol

17: Favorite food - Cheesecake

18: Do I use sarcasm - Yes, but very dryly

19: What am I listening to right now - Nothing actually. I'm just sitting in the quiet.

20: First thing I notice in new person - I used to think it was physical, like eyes or their smile, but I think it's actually their demeanor. i.e., confidence, if they're laid back, talkative or quiet, etc. Or even just how they handle things. Like when I'm at work and I meet a new co-worker I'm always noticing how they are with people.

21: Shoe size - 6.5 US but I can manage a 7 US too.

22: Eye color - Grey

23: Hair color - Ashy blonde, but I usually get it highlighted to be a brighter blonde

24: Favorite style of clothing - I'm super into the French girl vibe right now (elegany, classy, ribbed sweaters tucked into high waisted jeans or dress pants, a blazer thrown over and a nice gold necklace) but I'm also really into a summery boho look (flowy maxi dresses and skirts)

25: Ever done a prank call? No

27: Meaning behind my URL - On this account, it's just my name and then 'muses' because this account is just me talking to myself tbh. My main account is called autumnsletters which is just a combo of my fav things: autumn and handwritten love letters, and finally, my embarrassing taylor swift account is called sixteenavenue which is a lyric from her song I Think He Knows where she mentions her heart skipping down sixteenth avenue.

28: Favorite movie - I feel like i don't have one answer bc I always have a different answer to this question lmao. I think it's called A Christmas Carol (the 2009 version w/ Jim Carrey). It just makes me feel cozy and warm inside. Also: Clueless.

29: Favorite song - All Too Well by Taylor Swift I think.

30: Favorite band - Of Monsters and Men

31: How I feel right now - I actually feel really happy today, which is a change lol. I had an awful week last week, but over the last couple of days I've just felt more creative and happier.

32: Someone I love - My mom

33: My current relationship status - Single

34: My relationship with my parents - Excellent.

35: Favorite holiday - Christmas

36: Tattoos and piercing i have -0 :'(

37: Tattoos and piercing i want - I want to get my ears pierced again bc the holes grew over. Low key want a nose piericing and low key want a tattoo on my collarbone (or somewhere around there)

38: The reason I joined Tumblr - Because everyone else had it and I felt left out LOL

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? - I don't have an ex

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? - No

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? - No i've never been kissed rip

42: When did I last hold hands? - never but it's ok bc i can hold my own hand

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? - Depending on what I'm doing. If I showered the night before and I'm just doing a very low-maintenance look, roughly 15-20 mins. On a normal day in which I shower in the morning and am trying to actually be presentable, roughly an hour.

44: Have I shaved your legs in the past three days? - Have YOU shaved MY legs? No. Have I shaved my own? Yes

45: Where am I right now? - My room

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? - Most likely I'm not drunk, but IF I WAS, it would be my friend, my mom, or my sister (my sister would probs make fun of me and film me tho tbh)

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? - Loud if I'm jamming with nothing else to do but sing along. If I'm trying to do something, I'll turn it down bc I can't focus with loud music (especially if I'm trying to write something/talk to someone/text someone)

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? - My mom bc my dads dead

49: Am I excited for anything? - My sister and I are going to Banff in about three weeks so I'm excited for a getaway.

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? - No

51: How often do I wear a fake smile? - I work in retail so

52: When was the last time I hugged someone? - I don't know. I think I hugged my mom at some point this week lol

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? - Bye bye babyyyy

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? - my cat

55: What is something I disliked about today? - I had to go to work

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? - Taylor Alison Swift baby

57: What do I think about most? - Probably Taylor Swift.

58: What’s my strangest talent? - I can make stomach gurgling noises with my mouth closed.

59: Do I have any strange phobias? - Nah, pretty generic ones

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? - Behind the camera

61: What was the last lie I told? - Some lady asked if a product was good and I said yes so I wouldn't have to help her find another one

62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? - Neither what the hell

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? - Neither

64: Do I believe in magic? - No

65: Do I believe in luck? - No

66: What's the weather like right now? - It's calm, but a little cloudy. It was really warm and sunny earlier, but it's gotten a little grey.

67: What was the last book I've read? - I just finished this series called The Winner's Curse by Marie Rutkoski and it was so good but so stressful omg. Still 5/5 stars.

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? - Yes

69: Do I have any nicknames? - Not really, but sometimes my coworkers call my Kayls

70: What was the worst injury I've ever had? - Oh my god when I was like 10 I fell during grounders and the bar hit me right on the cooch. Most painful event of my entire life.

71: Do I spend money or save it? - Spend it bitch

72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue? - No

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me? - yes!! my blanket!!

74: Favorite animal? - I love hippos and I don't know why.

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? - Reading on my phone to avoid sleeping so I could prolong not going to work

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? - Devil. Kind of like Satan The Devil is his full name

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? - Shake It Off

78: How can you win my heart? - Learning Taylor Swift's entire discography for my sake

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? - tbh I really don't know

80: What is my favorite word? - Wonderstruck

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr - n/a

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? - stream fearless taylor's version

83: Do I have any relatives in jail? - no

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? - Healing

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? - N/A

86: What is my current desktop picture? - it's a misty forest

87: Had sex? - no

88: Bought condoms? - no

89: Gotten pregnant? - no

90: Failed a class? - yes

91: Kissed a boy? - no

92: Kissed a girl? - no

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? - no but it's a dream

94: Had a job? - I've had two so far

95: Left the house without my wallet? - Yes, sometimes I do it on purpose so I can make my mom pay for something lmao (chill i'm talking something small like candy)

96: Bullied someone on the internet? - no

97: Had sex in public? - no

98: Played on a sports team? - no

99: Smoked weed? - no

100: Did drugs? - no

101: Smoked cigarettes? - no

102: Drank alcohol? - yes

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? - no

104: Been overweight? - I feel overweight, but technically no

105: Been underweight? - No

106: Been to a wedding? - Yes

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? - Yes, but not since I was younger. I'm mostly on my phone now.

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? - Oh yeah lmao

109: Been outside my home country? - No

110: Gotten my heart broken? - Yes

111: Been to a professional sports game? - No

112: Broken a bone? - No

113: Cut myself? - Yes

114: Been to prom? - Sort of. I'm Canadian so I had grad.

115: Been in airplane? - No

116: Fly by helicopter? - No

117: What concerts have I been to? - Jonas Brothers when I was about 10 lmao and Marianas Trench when I was 15

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? - No

119: Learned another language? - Tried to

120: Wore make up? - Yes. I do work at a makeup store.

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? - no

122: Had oral sex? - no

123: Dyed my hair? - not a funky color, no

124: Voted in a presidential election? - Sort of; I voted for a prime minister

125: Rode in an ambulance? - Yes

126: Had a surgery? - No

127: Met someone famous? - No

128: Stalked someone on a social network? - No

129: Peed outside? - No

130: Been fishing? - No

131: Helped with charity? - Yes

132: Been rejected by a crush? - No bc I never fessed up to any crush lol

133: Broken a mirror? - No

134: What do I want for birthday? - A jewelry box

[realm-sweet-realm]

Breaking the Time Loop chapter 7: Around and Around

After the group was reunited, Henry gave Tom his seeing tool and explained the location of the coffins. He, Boris, and Bendy set off to collect the physical remains, and Henry and Alice set off to kill Bertrum. Alice quickly noticed that Henry looked ready to punch something.

"Something wrong, Henry?" she asked.

Henry uncurled his fists, suddenly aware and rather embarrassed at how angry he seemed. "Oh, nothing. Bendy has this baby duckling thing for me. Joey told him that a creator is like a father, and, well, I'm his creator. That's all."

"You know, there's a reason why I sent you off with him. I could have just gone myself if collecting the soul was the only reason. Why don't you trust him, Henry?"

"Why's that so strange to you? You saw how he was acting. You know that everyone here either has a soul or is imprinted upon by someone. Well, is it really any wonder who his imprint is?" Vehemence crept into Henry's normally calm voice. "It's Joey! Bendy is selfish! He's manipulative! He threatened years of my progress to get his way! And yeah, he's acting friendly now, but he's just playing as an adorable toon now instead of a kindly showman! God, Alice, I just want Joey out of my life once I get out of here. I don't need a piece of him calling me 'dad!'"

"Woah, Henry, wait. Bendy doesn't have Joey's imprint. No ink creature has an imprint and a soul. What he did before might as well have been done by another person. That blank soul makes him the purest toon out of all of us. No one else's memories or personality there at all. He's just Bendy now."

     "Oh my God," Henry whispered, attempting to absorb that crazy information. Letting Bendy in wouldn't be letting a piece of Joey back into his life. Just the sweet little devil he used to draw.  

     "So it wasn't an act... Tell me, how much of his old memory does he have?"  

     "Well, this hasn't really happened before. But if I had to guess? All of it."  

     No wonder then, why Bendy was so desperate for love and a father figure. Suddenly, none of those white lies Henry had told Bendy were lies anymore.  

     "Thank you for telling me. Now, let's go kill us an octopus."  

     With that, the two set off into the room containing Bertrum Piedmont, or what was left of him. Joey, for some godforsaken reason, had fused the man with an octopus-style amusement park ride. The outside of the ride was the same sickly sepia tone as everything else in the studio, but if you looked carefully, you could see where metal ended and bloated flesh began. The only word that could describe it was "macabre".  

     "Ready?" Henry asked Alison.  

     "Ready," she replied. Henry turned on the empty tape, and Bertrum began to speak.  

     "The biggest park ever built, a centerfold of attractions, each one more grand than the one before it," came an imposing, bitter voice, "It makes my eyes come to tears at the thought. But then... Oh, Mr Drew... for a man who speaks so often of dreams, you are the true architect behind so many nightmares. You might think I'm gone, but I'M- Wait...? Who is this with you? Joey, How could you? I cannot curse you out and kill you with a lady in the room!"  

     "Well, this is convenient," Henry deadpanned to Alice. Then, the two ran forward. Henry sunk his axe through one of the arms' joint. Alice stabbed Bertrum in the cheek. The ride sprung to life, leaving Henry barely enough time to duck. He rolled over onto his stomach and looked past the spinning mechanical arms to see Alice climbing the center of the ride. She looked back.  

     "Look out! She shouted. Henry scrambled out of the way to avoid being crushed by the falling arm. Knowing that he had a few seconds, he ran to the centre of the ride. Alice grabbed his hand and pulled him onto the ride's centre. It started up again, forcing the duo to cling for dear life. They awaited the ride's stop, but it did not stop. Finally, Henry accepted that he had to crawl to the panel. Alice followed his lead.  

     "Alice, grab my legs!" Henry commanded. She hooked her legs around the center of the ride and obeyed, allowing Henry to work at the panel. With effort, he was able to heave it loose. He threw the panel off the ride, and slammed his fist on the button it revealed. The ride ground to a halt. At last, Henry allowed himself to go limp until the world stopped spinning.  

     "Damn you to Hell itself!" Bertrum shouted before going on another monologue, which the duo ignored as they climbed down. Alice gave Henry a look that said, "is he going to stop soon?"  

     "Let him talk," Henry said calmly. Bertrum eventually finished. Henry stepped forwards, getting closer and closer to Bertrum's face, including his very near-sighted eyes. "Do I look like Joey to you?" Henry asked.  

     Bertrum stared down. Though the figure before him was still a bit fuzzy, he could make out that the he was effortlessly walking towards him. Joey would have been limping without his cane. As Henry came closer still, Bertrum could recognize that the man was grey-blond and well-built, while Joey had been very thin and dark-haired. "No... You don't," Bertrum concluded.  

     "That's right. I'm not. My name is Henry Stein. I used to work here as an animator. Joey called me back. I guess that's because I used to be his closest friend, and so he thinks that I'm the one who can solve everything he messed up down here. Honestly, sometimes I consider myself just another one of his victims. But hey, I'm here, and so I might as well try to get out and leave no one behind. I want to make you Bertrum Piedmont again. What do you say?"  

     "I say, thank you very much, Henry Stein. Yes, please do."  

     "Okay, now close your eyes. This is going to hurt a moment."  

     "Don't you dare speak to me like a child!"  

     "Alright, I'll be honest, then. We need to kill you and put you through the ink machine. I'd definitely suggest closing your eyes, but it's your choice."  

     "Thank you for your honesty, but I cannot move my eyes.  I'm ready for your ritual whenever you are."  

     Henry beckoned Alice over. "Alright, let's make this quick. I'll count down from three," he said, "One, and two, and three!" on the count of three, Alice stabbed Bertrum through the eye with her sword. For good measure, Henry whacked him in the jaw with his ax, as well. He'd heard that a strong strike to the jaw was a good way to knock someone out. It seemed to be true in this case, as Bertrum was out cold. Alice reached up and captured Bertrum's soul as it escaped from him. Two down, two to go.  

[americanoemmy]

@ofthequeenofmean

[smokeybrand]

Smokey brand Movie Reviews: A Real Kick in the Cunt

A while back, i saw this weirdly overproduced trailer for a flick call Promising Young Woman between Youtube videos and thought it looked interesting. I expected it to be kind of wonky. It felt like this sh*t should have went the way of, say, Terminal but i watched that so i figured why not watch this, too. I was intrigued by the look of the film and, after researching it a bit, found myself enthralled with the plot. In a year where the movie pickings are mad slim, will Promising Young Woman deliver?

The Good

Immediately, the music to this film hits you like a ton of bricks. You can tell that this soundtrack is going to be an intricate aspect of this cinematic experience. From the second that Charli XCX remix hits over those credits, you knew this was going to be an entire situation and i was totally down for it. This flick did not disappoint from that perspective.

I love the whole visual of this film. The way the camera frames everything, the saturation of color, the almost surreal nature of the visuals; They all coalesce into a real feast for the eyes. There is a very distinct presentation displayed and it feels as unique as a film like Atomic Blonde or Terminal. I kind of really love it.

Bro, i love this cast, man. It’s kind of amazing. Alison Brie, Clancy Brown, Jennifer Coolidge, Laverne Cox, Connie Britton, Molly Shannon, Alfred Molina, Adam Brody, Alex Greenfield and Christopher Mintz-Plasse. Like, this thing is straight up loaded to the gills with that star talent. I mean, they even got McLovin in on the action and none of them disappoint. That said, this is definitely Carey Mulligan’s movie.

There is a level of chemistry that runs through every performance in this film. It’s actually preppy palpable. It enriches the very core of this film and makes each relationship feel incredibly authentic.

Carey Mulligan turns in an amazing performance as the lead, Cassie Thomas. She feels like an extension of such violent heroines as Asami Yamazaki from Audition or Jen from Revenge. Cassie is intelligent, calculating, captivating, amazingly charismatic, and terrifyingly sinister. There is a real, underlying, malevolence to Cassie and i ate it all up. Mulligan delivers this with such precision, it’s unnerving.

Bo Burnham was lovely in his role as the love interest, Ryan Cooper. He has this awkward, earnest, energy that s the perfect counter to the abject disdain that Mulligan festers. Dude has some stand out scenes that really show his range as an actor. Dude is one of the best of his generation, Eight Grade showed us that, and that excellence carries over to this role, too. I’m looking forward to what he does next.

Emerald Fennell really directs her ass of in this thing. I’m familiar with her work from Killing Eve, another excellent work, chock full of that potent female energy, and i loved that, too. I really enjoyed the look of this film, the feel of this presentation. There is a distinct passion behind the camera, like she knows this story and absolutely needs to tell it. That makes sense because she also wrote the thing. Definitely an auteur creator in the making. Considering this is literally Fennell’s directorial debut, i have to say, she has a bright future ahead of her.

I have to say, the pacing of this film is pretty brisk. It’s about seven minutes shy of two hours but never actually feels that way. Again, the deft touch from Fennell is definitely on display. One of the pitfalls of freshman directors is wonky pacing, most take a film or two to find that sweet spot, but Ferrell seems to have a handle on it out the gate.

The Okay

The plot isn’t rally anything new. It’s your basic revenge story with a bleaker ending than most but the devil is in the details. The strength of this narrative lies in the performances and the presentation. You’ve definitely seen this story told before, and probably better, but never like this. Assassination Nation and I Spit On Your Grave are similar takes on this type of plot. While the story being told is rather cliche to the point of being a sub-genre in it’s own right, how this trope is told makes for a great experience.

This thing is definitely a Carey Mulligan vehicle. That’s not a bad thing, per say, but the rest of this cast was amazing and we don’t get enough time with them. Alfred Molina and Laverne Cox steal every scene they’re in and i just wanted a little more time with them. Alas, it was not to be...

The Verdict

I really liked this movie, man. It is one of the best I've seen this year. One of but not the best. Promising Young Woman is gorgeous in every way that counts, with one of the strongest lead performances from Carey Mulligan i have ever seen her give. The direction is on point and the cinematography is absolutely stunning. Like, i really enjoy this camera work, man. The supporting cast is chock full of heavy-weights and they bring as much energy and believability to their roles as Mulligan. The only real downside is the fact that this story is a little cliche in the cinematic zeitgeist but what narratives aren’t? Is this flick perfect? No. But it is fun, engaging, and entertaining If you have the opportunity to check it out, definitely watch Promising Young Woman It dd not disappoint.

[tvmecaps]

1. god I can’t believe I’m watching this again 2. WHY ARE THE EPISODES SO LONG 3. IT’S ARIE WHAT COULD POSSIBLY HAPPEN

4. “how’s everyone feeling today?” “i’m emotionally and physically drained” this is me every morning

5. if i had to go on a group date with krystal i would absolutely find a way to accidentally punch her in the throat 6. i like tia she just runs around making noises 7. the fuck is a glob 8. THE KISSING BANDIT god i hate this man 9. if someone surprised me with a wrestling date i’d kill myself 10. OMG IS ALISON BRIE HERE 11. the fuck it’s not even alison brie 12. oh they’re like the real wrestlers lmao 13. i have no idea what bekah's personality is

14. wrestler lady: “who wants it?” tia: *raises her hand but only like, a little bit*

15. arie was talking and my mom said from across the room “what are you watching it’s putting me to sleep” 16. lauren b is just standing in the corner laughing i’m dying 17. oh my god she’s just… insulted bibiana’s name? 18. WHAT IS HAPPENING

19. wrestler lady: “I could take you down right now!” tia: “i would let you”

20. bekah’s gonna beat the shit out of them 21. the girls are literally crying 22. IMAGINE GOING ON A DATE WHERE THE ENTIRE PREMISE WAS THAT YOU WERE GOING TO GET BULLIED 23. i really wish alison brie was here 24. shut the fuck up bekah go call your mom 25. “has anyone even watched WWE?” literally no 26. i love tia 27. tia winning would be justice for raven 28. BIBIANA IN A DINOSAUR MASK 29. i want chris harrison to beat the shit out of arie 30. i don’t even remember who kenny is

31. bring back peter

32. who is the lunch lady 33. imagine having to pretend to fall in love with arie 34. oh my god what is HAPPENING 35. imagine losing to krystal 36. LMAO KRYSTAL IS LITERALLY BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF THIS GIRL 37. is this… porn 38. i think this is porn 39. aw i love tia and bibiana 40. every time arie speaks i want to fast forward

41. i’m trying to snapchat arie and krystal but i can’t get a clear enough shot of their faces because all they’re doing is kissing really grossly 42. oh my god 43. snapchat makes this show so much better

44. “he’s fucking awesome” yeah ok tia 45. WHY DOES ARIE JUST KISS EVERYONE 46. “i have a feeling i’ll be on that one on one date because he knows i’m a mom” god in all my krystal hatred i forgot how awful chelsea was 47. i cannot tell any of the laurens apart

48. “and i just feel like these girls are living in a false reality” oh my god she’s CLINICAL

49. HAHAHAH HE GAVE IT TO BEKAH 50. SUCK A DICK, KRYSTAL 51. she’s just SMILING THROUGH THE PAIN 52. LIKE THE PSYCHOPATH SHE IS

53. is krystal literally just going around the house talking to the other girls about how strong her connection with arie is…

54. “this is a very Lauren S. date” - lauren S

55. “i like to go to bed early” of course you do arie you’re like 60

56. hulu isn’t working and i feel like this is a message from god 57. ugh no it’s back

58. “i feel like you’re a little bit of a wine connoisseur.” “no i just like drinking wine.” the most relatable arie has ever been

59. SHE’S JUST RAMBLING 60. SHE’S BEEN RAMBLING FOR PROBABLY AN HOUR 61. SHE JUST KEEPS TALKING 62. LAUREN S PLEASE STOP TALKING 63. she’s literally talking so much that arie is actually eating

64. “how is ‘ruff’ spelled?” “r-u-f-f” *everyone SCREAMS*

65. THERE IS A TRAUMATIC SITUATION FOR EVERY EVENT ON THIS SHOW

66. he’s NOT GIVING HER THE ROSE 67. I’M SO UNCOMFORTABLE 68. THIS IS THE WORST THING I’VE EVER SEEN 69. god that was awful 70. ugh i liked her 71. or at least like… i didn’t hate her 72. why is krystal talking about her like she died 73. dear god SHUT!!!!! UP!!!!!!!

74. “stop being so condescending to everybody because you like, met his dog.” CAROLINE FOR PRESIDENT

75. how is it only 9:00 i feel like I’ve been watching this episode for six years 76. tag yourself i’m the blonde bitch jumping up and down when arie even vaguely alludes to a dog 77. when does unReal come back 78. THESE DOGS ARE SO TALENTED 79. my dog can’t even walk without falling down

80. LMAO WAIT IS ANNALIESE 81. IS SHE THE ONE WITH THE BUMPER CAR ISSUES TOO 82. who PUT THESE FLASHBACKS TOGETHER 83. “AND I ALMOST LOST MY EYE,” SHE SAYS AS A CRYING BABY SCREAMS IN SEPIA

84. bibiana signs off from her prayer with “love you bye!!”

85. “we have just a random girl who’s walked up as well” same 86. i would just hold my dog and pet him 87. why is annalise so enthusiastic about poop 88. she’s really owning it though 89. how are there still so many girls left i only know like six of them 90. omg I can’t wait for chelsea to go home 91. her poor child is going to have to watch this someday

92. “dogs are so cute” wow arie is full of gold tonight 93. “i have never had the opportunity for someone to respect me for who i am” ok chelsea 94. i wonder what arie is thinking about at any given time 95. “the last time you said you were in love was five years ago on this show. tell me more about that.” do you really think that’s the best topic of conversation here

96. i wonder if arie is stoned or if he just naturally looks like that

97. omg annalise stop complaining and just go talk to him 98. ten years from now someone’s gonna say the word bachelor and she’s gonna have flashbacks to THIS traumatic moment 99. HE JUST KEEPS KISSING PEOPLE 100. it’s never a good sign when the dude says “so how do you think things are going” 101. he’s so not into her 102. that was painful 103. poor annaliese 104. she deadass got her coat on LMAO

105. HE CAN’T HOLD A CONVERSATION AND JUST SLOWLY MOVES HIS FACE CLOSER TO THE OTHER GIRL THE ENTIRE TIME UNTIL THEY STOP TALKING TO KISS

106. THIS IS THE WORST I HATE HIM!!!!!!

107. “today was really fun. i loved today. today was such a cool day. it was amazing.” - literally a sentence that arie just said

108. maybe he is super stoned 109. how dare they show me a black panther commercial and then make me go back to watching the bachelor 110. who does bekah look like 111. she looks like someone

112. BIBIANA SET THE ENTIRE THING UP AND HE JUST TOOK THIS BLONDE BITCH OUT HERE 113. I’M SCREAMING 114. LMAO WHAT THE FUCK 115. WHO MANIPULATED THIS SITUATION INTO EXISTENCE 116. WHERE IS QUINN KING!!!!! 117. SHE’S GOING TO SEE THEM KISSING BECAUSE WHAT ELSE DOES ARIE DO 118. “he’s with lauren b on my setup” i would literally cry 119. THE DEVIL IS WROKING OT 120. HE’S TAKING EVERY FUCKING GIRL TO IT 121. I’M SCREAMING!!!!!!!!!!! 122. THIS MAN IS SUCH TRASH LMAO!!!!!!

123. EVERY SINGLE TIME HE TAKES A NEW GIRL OUT THERE HE’S LIKE LMAO I DON’T KNOW WHO SET THIS UP BUT ISN’T IT NICE? LET’S KISS!!

124. AHH!!!!!!!! 125. annaliese is gonna force him to kiss her

126. he got tia HAY BALES AND MOONSHINE 127. I’M SCREAMING WHAT HTE FUCK IS THIS SHOW 128. SHE’S TALKING AND HE’S JUST 129. SLOWLY MOVING HIS FACE TO HER 130. MOUTH OPEN

131. i hope they checked him for herpes

132. the bitch smiling because annaliese hasn’t kissed him 133. he’s going to send annaliese home right now isn’t he 134. this is so uncomfortable because she’s like BEGGING him to kiss her 135. i’ve never seen arie REFUSE to kiss someone 136. this is awful 137. he said no and i gasped 138. that was literally the most dramatic thing that’s happened this entire season 139. this is so dumb

140. you know annaliese and bibiana are going home because he deadass has sought out EVERY OTHER GIRL TONIGHT to stick his tongue down their throats one last time

141. arie is definitely lowkey racist 142. why does he make jokes that 11 year old boys would make 143. if i never see arie kiss another human it will be too soon 144. aw bye annaliese 145. “bye ladies,” she says, crying 146. WHO SAID SHE’S KIDDING 147. “i don’t know what this man is thinking” but literally everyone watching does 148. god shut up krystal

149. “i feel really confident, but also i don’t have a rose,” she says, BEFORE THE ROSE CEREMONY

150. “i had to make one hard decision” arie you’ve sent two girls home 151. the camera zoomed in on krystal when he saw the word wife dear god 152. OH HER NAME IS KENDALL? I like her 153. why did only one girl walk up when he said lauren 154. there are like at least four laurens left 155. bye bib 156. LMAO WAIT DOES HE EVEN KNOW SHE SET UP THE DAY BED 157. he definitely doesn’t 158. thank god this is over 159. THEY’RE TLAKING ABOUT HER DOG FEARS AGAIN 160. oh my god

[coolness22]

Your friendly neighborhood devil.

Summary:

After becoming the center of a spell performed by a group of witches you find yourself with an unlikely companion.

Prologue:

If someone were to tell you a week ago that you would end up with the devil as a companion you would have laughed at them, called them insane, and then walked off forgetting about the whole thing.

It all started on a cold August night. You were just getting ready to walk home from your friend’s house when she suggested that you stay the night instead. It was dark out and you had a fare way to go so you agreed seeing no harm in staying.

At this point you didn’t know that your friend was in a cult of Satanist witches. You soon found out when you woke up tied to a pillar a few hours later surrounded by cloaked figures.

The cloaks they were wearing were a deep red satin with black lining inside. They must have just thrown them on top of their normal clothes as you recognised your friend’s clothes from before you fell asleep.

The building you were in seemed to be an old warehouse of some sorts. The ground beneath you had strange symbols on all around the pillar, you recognised one as a pentagram of sorts. In front of you was a dark marble looking bowl filled with some unknown powders.

Through the small window you were able to look through you could see the moon. It was a beautiful full moon with a slight orange glow presumably from the thin cloud covering that was there.

“What’s going on here?” You inquired still groggy from sleep. You slumped against the post till you were sat on the ground. Your friend Alison stopped to look at you while everyone else there continued what they were doing.

“We’re preparing another attempt at summoning our lord Satan” she stated simply as if it were obvious before continuing what she was doing.

“Satan? As in the devil himself? Lucifer Morningstar?”

“Yes” she replied with a sweet smile.

“And what am I doing here exactly?” You asked in an annoyed tone shifting slightly where you were tied up. Alison huffed before turning round to face you again.

“We need a sacrifice of sorts, our lord will need a human vessel in order to walk the earth and that’s going to be you.” She told you clearly annoyed by the constant questions. After that she continued with her work while you thought about the implications of being a vessel to the devil.

“Wait you said another. How many times have you done this before?” You asked a little panicked wondering why they had to try again. Had the last few attempts failed? If so then how bad would it be if this attempt failed?

“Well,” she began looking at you a little sheepishly, “we’ve done this about 5 times before and something has ended up going wrong each time, but don’t worry we’ll get it right this time.” She finished with a reassuring smile as if to make you feel better.

“Enough talk, it is almost time to begin the spell” one of the others said. Presumably the leader from the important looking pendant she had around her neck. It was now that you noticed how the light of the moon was lining up to shine directly onto your figure encircling the symbols that were drawn around you.

The group began chanting some kind of spell and as the light got closer the symbols began to glow. They threw a match into the bowl just before the light fully matched with the circle of symbols. When the flames went out almost immediately you thought the spell had failed and that it was all over. That thought soon changed when they began to throw the ash over you while the moon light was directly lined up.

As they began to throw the contents of the bowl over you pinch by pinch everything began to shake. The more they emptied the bowl the more things shook. When there was only a few pinches left in the bowl the shaking stopped.

Just before the last pinch could be gathered someone burst through the door. You couldn’t see who it was from where you were but you could hear them. As you heard the footsteps getting closer they began to talk.

“What on earth is going on in here? I’m walking past and all I can see is this place shaking like a mad house.” The stranger exclaimed as he got closer. His voice steady and dark, portraying the kind of stillness felt before a predator pounces on its prey. You could hear his footsteps slowly echoing closer to you, alarms ringing in your head that this guy was probably bad news but you weren’t scared of him. Something about him made you fell calm, like he was your way of escaping this madness.

“Who on earth are you? How dare you interrupt us at a time like this. Do you have any idea what you’ve done?” The leader yelled flailing her arms excessively as if to make a point.

“It seems as if I have interrupted some sort of ceremony? Apparently saving this young girls life in the process.” His tone was condescending though he didn’t seem to care about the fact he interrupted the proceedings. 

“We have to wait another 28 days before we can try again miss,” one of them began “it would be in our best interest to leave peacefully, at least then we will still have the ingredients to try again.” It was at this point you realised why they couldn’t finish the spell. The light of the moon has already moved on and the symbols had stopped glowing.

“I think you should all just wait a little, you’re all gonna go at my pace for a little while. Don’t even think about trying to leave.” The stranger insisted, his tone seeming to freeze the group with what looked like fear. He moved to the side of you and crouched down to untie the rope binding you to the pillar. 

From what you could see he was fairly handsome. Dirty blond hair, pale blue eyes and a devilish smile. When you were free from the bindings he told you to get out of there, go to the nearest town and get some rest, so you did, you ran out of there as fast as you could.

“Who are you?” The leader said with a tone of uncertainty clearly still a little scared from the seriousness of the sudden interruptions voice.

“I think I’m gonna ask the question first,” he began, his face showing nothing but annoyance, “what exactly where you doing with that girl tied up over there?”

“W-we we’re trying to summon our lord to us, it was our 6th try, we were going to be successful this time b-but then you arrived and, uh, it wasn’t so successful” she replied stammering a bit with fear, her overall demeanour shrinking under his judgmental gaze.

“You’re right, the spell was working, if you think about it, it technically did work.” 

“You never did say who you were”

“Oh me? Right, please allow me to introduce myself, I go by many names, morning star, the light bringer, Beelzebub, our lord in your case but, just call me Lucifer.” He stayed with an evil smile on his face, a glow in his eyes. The morning after the only traces of anyone being there the night before was chalk markings of the ground and small piles of ash mixed with droplets if blood.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part 1

All right! New year new story, but don’t worry I’m still working on Knives and Feathers. I hope this story turns out as well as i hope it does so wish me luck.

I’d like to thank @arazialotis​ for the description of Lucifer’s voice. Pure poetry.

some lines he says at the end are inspired by this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRXGsPBUV5g

Enjoy :)