#blog theme later

[ultimaterickshowdown]

for sake of transparency, this is the current lineup after randomizing for matchups and then randomizing again for the lineup itself. this is a bonkers list of ricks already but if u feel im missing ur special rickbo lmk

[cheswirls]

short asl thing based on @where-does-the-heart-lie's modern au :) i started this over a year ago but the beginning is all dialogue and felt more like a script to me i suppose??? which deflated my desire to work on it. anyway i checked it over recently and it's completely fine lmfao, self-confidence restored here we go !

-

"Yo. Aren't you usually in the middle of your shift by now?"

"I've been banned from the hospital."

"Like, for life?"

"No. For the next, uh.. Twenty-two hours."

"That's oddly specific."

"It was twenty-four, but I fell asleep after leaving the building."

"That wouldn't have to do with why they kicked you out, at all?"

"Hmmm. I'm too sleep-deprived, apparently."

"Ah. And, um, you called me because...?"

"I pressed a random number in my call log after waking up. Lucky you, I guess."

"Yeah. Right. Lucky me. And your car keys are...?"

"Confiscated."

"Ah, right, of course."

A beat of silence. Two. Three, then "Look, if you're busy, then–"

"No, no.  You called me, so I'll be there. Give me twenty minutes."

"Alright. Thank–"

"Thank someone else. Also, if you fall asleep in my car, I'm taking it as express permission to drive you around wherever I want."

"Ugh, go die. I don't even know why I bothered."

"LUCKY YOU, I guess," sounds off way too loudly in his ear. "No take backs. See you in ten."

"I thought you said–" Sabo breaks off as the call ends, leaving him staring blankly at his phone's too-dim screen. He squints, turns the brightness all the way up, and still squints as the sunlight proves too strong for the display.

Ace shows up in more than ten but decidedly less than twenty minutes. Sabo doesn't waste much brain power on it, only climbing into the passenger seat and yawning into his palm while his other hand fixes the seatbelt into the buckle. Not a second too soon, too, as Ace roars the engine to life and peels away from the curb at record speed.

Ace fiddles with the radio. He turns the music up, then dial it back down to inaudible. They hit the expressway and he leans over the steering wheel, frowning with his eyes fixed on the road far ahead. Sabo yawns again and this appears to be the limit to his patience. 

"Hey, so, I had a thought after you hung up on me."

Sabo grimaces. "You mean you–"

"Today's Wednesday."

He doesn't elaborate. Sabo is too tired to process. "Yes," he follows, after a second. He glances at the sky out the front window. "What time is it?"

"Oh, uh." Ace fumbles with hand placement so he can lift his watch to his face. "Nine forty."

Sabo takes a couple beats to try and process this, moves his eyes away from the skyline, and sighs as he pulls his phone out. 2:47 is what the display reads, which sounds much more believable.

"How did the minute hand get off?" he mutters to himself, chancing a look at Ace's busted wristwatch. Ace raises a brow, taking his gaze off the road to scrutinize Sabo. "No, it doesn't matter," he mutters to himself once more, sliding his phone away back on his person and out of his hands.

"My point is," Ace continues, like he hasn't just been interrupted by a whole thing. "Your timeout will be done midday Thursday. Did they switch your days off?"

"No." Sabo sighs. "They technically gave me the next thirty-six hours. Technically closer to forty. Something like that. I go back in on Friday. Sometime.” He tries to smile and it turns out very lopsided, from that he can make out in the rearview mirror. “Can you tell I’m tired?”

“I don’t think ‘tired’ is an accurate description,” Ace quips. “When did you eat a proper meal last?”

“Uh, yesterday. Maybe.”

“Maybe??”

“A ‘proper meal’ means different things to the two of us,” Sabo huffs. “On my account it was yesterday. I’ve had food since then, of course.”

“Alright, so here’s the plan,” Ace announces before absolutely whipping it around a curve. Sabo is his passenger in the passenger seat and had fully prepared to be so when he got in the vehicle, but he’d been vastly underprepared for this sudden course of action, which is how he ends up halfway out of his seat with his cheek slammed into the cold window. Ace doesn’t quite notice his brother’s terminal velocity until the car is once again on the straight and narrow, and only then it’s because of the audible thunk Sabo’s face makes when it collides with the glass.

“Aw shit. You good bro?”

“Ow,” Sabo mutters. “If I have broken bones I’m suing your ass.”

“Well, if you’re good enough to make jokes, I think you’re better than you’re letting on.” Ace keeps the wheel steady with one knee while he takes both hands away to crack his fingers. When he glances over at Sabo again, he looks even more pathetic – like he’s becoming one with the glass. “Anyway, as I was saying.

“I’m taking your ass home. You’re going straight to sleep and while you crash, I’ll make you something decent to eat and stick it in the fridge for you to heat up later. I’ll even make you two servings to eat two different times, since you clearly can’t be trusted to take care of yourself correctly.”

“Ouch.”

“I want you to conk out for as long as your body allows. We can reset your sleep schedule tomorrow, alright? Put your phone on silent; do not answer any calls. In fact, you know what, just give it to me.

Sabo glances over to see Ace’s hand held out to him, palm up. Fingers wiggling expectantly. His lips pull up into a grimace. “I’m not doing that.”

“Fine.” Ace takes his hand back. “But you will comply with everything else.”

“Wow! It’s so funny, I didn’t realize you turned into my mother overnight! Really tapped into your mom potential, huh? Anything exciting happen in your life that would cause that? I guess I wouldn’t know, since I’ve been a zombie for the past two days.”

“There’s nothing wrong with acting like your older brother, you dipshit, especially if you keep putting yourself through the wringer like this. You go home. You sleep. You wake up and eat. You go back to sleep. Then we do laundry. Does that sound agreeable?”

“That’s negotiable, at the least,” Sabo mumbles. “I will accept good food as a form of bribery.”

“Oh, nice, because I’m flat broke at the moment.”

Sabo makes a mental note of that, and then they’re pulling into the driveway. Ace lets him exit the vehicle by himself and then promptly manhandles him all the way onto the couch where it will be easier to force his body to relax than in a real bed. Ace knows this, so he calls him weird before chucking a loose blanket at his head. Sabo is almost too tired to function at this point, so he lets Ace have the last laugh in favor of finally closing his eyes.

Coming to is a surreal experience, especially since the sun is still out. He must make a noise because Ace is suddenly within view. His limbs are tangled in the blanket and still so heavy that he doesn’t bother moving. “Thought you would be gone,” he half-groans, eyes slipping shut again for a moment.

“I did leave,” Ace confirms. “I had to go pilfer some stuff to make stew with. It’s almost done, so I’ll hang here until then.”

Pilfer. That could mean any number of things. Sabo chooses to believe in the option where Ace is an upstanding citizen, and then remembers Ace saying earlier that he had no money. He frowns and squirms on the cushions enough to where it looks like he’s checking his pockets. “Where’s my wallet, Ace?” he bluffs.

“Somewhere around here,” Ace pipes up. “Your stomach will thank you for your contributions to the Portgas Household’s pantry!”

“Ugh, I got robbed,” he complains. “This sucks. ‘m going back to sleep.” He rolls over so his back is to Ace.

“Yeah, you do you, bro. Stew will still be here later. I’ll see you when you’re back in the world of the living.”

—

Luffy comes in late that night and slams the front door shut as loud as humanly possible. When he appears in the main room, he doesn’t seem to be upset, so Ace writes it off as a Luffyism. Sabo hasn’t stirred at the noise, so it’s all good.

Realizing this, Luffy pads closer to Ace’s side and looks at Sabo’s unmoving body warily. “Why is Sabo passed out like a corpse? Is he sick?”

“No, he’s not sick, he just can’t take care of himself. Which is why we are going to let him sleep for as long as possible.”

Luffy just nods to this, but it’s the uncomprehending Luffy-nod that means he’s just going to end up doing whatever he wants to regardless. Ace sighs, then jerks his head towards the kitchen. “He ate a little earlier, but I want him to eat again when he wakes up. There’s stew in the fridge if you want it – just leave him a little. Got it, Monkey D. Luffy?”

Luffy throws him a salute and then runs off in his socks. “Yippee! Ace made stew!”

“Think of your brother, Luffy, and make good choices!” Ace calls after him. “He’s a pathetic man who needs food to feel better or he’ll end up sleeping through Laundry Day!”

—

Sabo does not sleep through laundry day, but he does sleep for sixteen whole hours, so it’s just around noon when he forces himself up off the couch and into a warm shower.

Ace is around, which is mildly unexpected. But he’s still half-asleep, so everything is at least a little unexpected. He glances up from playing video games with Luffy to see Sabo leaving the steam-filled bathroom with his hair hanging around his shoulders. “You look like a wet cat,” he calls.

“Sabo’s awake!” Luffy cheers. “Ace thought you died at one point.”

Ace elbows Luffy in the gut, making him hunch over. “I did not!”

“He totally checked to see if your heart was still beating!”

“I’m undead, actually,” Sabo says completely seriously.

“Does that mean you don’t need to eat anymore?” Luffy questions. “Because I ate all the stew last night.”

“I saw that coming and made extra.” Ace finger-guns in Sabo’s general direction. “That’s why I bought two sets of ingredients. With your money!”

“With my money,” Sabo echoes, because it’s such a wild statement to have to deal with this early in the day. Well, early for him. “Fuck you.”

“I mean, I can tell Luffy where I hid–”

“Thank you, Ace, for agreeing to share your quarters with both of your brothers so we can all do laundry today on your dime!” Sabo raises his pitch so his voice is mockingly squeaky when he says this. He starts moving down the hall before Ace can start to argue, letting his and Luffy’s voices bleed into the background.

When he comes back out, now dressed, it smells significantly better than before. “I reheated the stew,” Ace announces, gesturing for Sabo to take a seat at the kitchen counter. “Let’s all have lunch before we head out.”

“You have to drink this too,” Luffy tells Sabo, sliding a Gatorade across the counter so it sets in front of him when he finally does take a seat. “Ace’s orders.”

“Gotta get those nutrients back somehow.”

“Aren’t we so considerate, Sabo?”

“Do you even know what ‘considerate’ means?” Sabo asks, lips quirking up into a half-smile. At Luffy’s shrug, it turns into a real smile. “Well, thanks anyway. Both of you.”

“No sweat. And look!” Ace brandishes a five dollar bill for both to see. “I found this baby for us to use on coins! It’s all on me today–”

“Where’s my wallet, Ace?!”

[reunitedinterlude]

summer phantasy: the album

tracks 5-8 (x)

[tomaturtles]

Can you believe there's an officially licensed kawoshin childhood friends au

[coolsvilleprincess]

Be goth, solve crime.

Birthing this Scooby Doo specific blog with fanart for Be Cool because I needed to draw their goth fits, they were simply too much of a vibe to not tbh

[lovecoredeity]

recent paycheck got fucked and after paying my phone bill I don’t have any money left for other necessities until my next paycheck (a whole two weeks from now) so now I have to attempt to sell ✨this✨ doll themed adoptable, I’m not like even sure how to go about pricing it so instead we’re doing ✨an auction✨ starting at $25! I have Zero Confidence that this will even receive bids or be sold but here we are anyways! I do not have a specific “reach this amount to buy the design” price in mine I’m sorry I’m bad at pricing things and have 0 confidence in my art </3

[dnphan]

my new pfp because dan howell said chappell roan

[asouefanworkevent]

oh! your mysterious moderator appears, with a picture of lemony snicket? is it that time of year already?

woevember, the asoue/atwq fanwork week, is coming to us all once more! stay tuned for this year's event post, arriving tuesday 🍂

[3l91]

bkak detective au.

PI bokuto koutarou and his roommate akaashi keiji..

more thoughts (first meeting) belo w..

pplease take my pathetic attempt at narrative as i try to beam my vision to you in my brain 😊,,,

--- --- --- ---

Akaashi's legs are tired from walking.

"Do you need to sit down for a second?"

"No, I'm alright."

Despite this, he still refuses to stop moving, following at a brisk pace beside his old classmate, Konoha Akinari, who'd been living in the capital for some time now.

It was clear by the way he walked and maneuvered his way through the bustling streets that Konoha had grown accustomed to the crowds and the noise, things that only made Akaashi grit his teeth in silent displeasure as they continued their way through the city.

It hadn't started off that way, of course. Lunch had been pleasant. The atmosphere of the restaurant was different from what Akaashi was used to, but it was a good kind of different. In fact, he'd even found himself dazzled by the sights and the people.

It wasn't until they started walking towards Konoha's old housing complex that the charm of the city started to settle down on him in an unpleasant way. There were too many people, too many streets, too many noises. He isn't used to this feeling of excess, and his head is swimming by the time Konoha says, Just around this corner.

Akaashi figures he's done a great job at masking his discomfort, as the two of them don't stop for a minute until they reach the door of a single apartment building, the city's presence receding ever so slightly into the background as Konoha rounds on Akaashi, hands on his hips.

"I already warned you, my ex-roommate's a bit of a weird guy. Nice, but weird. I'm already sort of wondering why I thought this would be an okay idea..."

Akaashi blinks, nods. Idly adjusting his glasses with an index finger, he clears his throat before responding.

"I just need a place to stay for a few days while I sort out permanent housing. It's very nice of your ex-roommate to have offered the space."

"Well, I don't know about nice..."

Akaashi would only find out later that this mysterious ex-roommate was having trouble with rent.

"Shall we let him know we're here? We're already a few minutes late."

"...Right."

As Konoha takes his time knocking on the door, Akaashi's mind clears enough to recall Konoha's previous testimony regarding this ex roommate of his.

First of all, he'd told Akaashi, I'm only telling you about this place because you're in immediate need of lodging. But just so you can't say I didn't warn you, the guy is a little eccentric.

That was how Konoha had framed his warning, and while many of the things he'd stated afterwards about this roommate (that he was messy, that he was loud, that he snored like crazy, got into strange moods where he wouldn't speak to Konoha for days -- "I won't lie, those weren't bad times." -- only to shake him awake to talk about some incomprehensible subject) would have normally dissuaded Akaashi from even considering sharing a living space with the man, there was one thing that Konoha mentioned about his ex-roommate that piqued Akaashi's interest.

"HEY, HEY, HEY! If it isn't Konoha!"

With a burst of energy as loud as the bang! that accompanied the thrown-open door, comes a presence as bombastic as Akaashi had been warned to anticipate.

"And how's the great detective been doing lately?"

Konoha looks as tired as Akaashi feels the second his ex-roommate makes his appearance, giving him a wry smile and a half wave.

The man in front of them is too much to take in all at once, but it isn't his stature that Akaashi latches on to first, nor is i the shock of white hair upon his head.

It's the way the other man beams at the title that was most assuredly stated sarcastically, the one piece of information that made Akaashi's trek through the city worth it, that little tidbit that caught his eye during Konoha's 30 minute public advisory warning given several days before, that simple turn of phrase -- great detective.

"Busy! I'm busy all the time! But, hey, is this the guy you were telling me about? Akashi something or othe -"

"Akaashi. Akaashi Keiji," he says. "It's nice to meet you."

There's a small moment of silence as Bokuto looks Akaashi up and down. He isn't subtle about it at all, the way he gives Akaashi a once over from head to toe. Through it all, Bokuto's smile never once falters, and Akaashi's cool expression never once breaks. The only one who seems to have any sort of change in demeanor is Konoha, whose face is morphing into something close to panic the longer the silence continues.

This was a terrible idea, wasn't it? To allow someone like Akaashi - always composed, proper, quiet - anywhere near a loudmouthed character like Bokuto who would almost certainly drive him up the wall. Why had Konoha thought it would be okay, even though Akaashi had -- strangely -- agreed to meet with his ex-roommate, who had him out the door in a measly one and a half months?!

And yet-

"Soon as you wanna."

The question is asked too quickly and answered too quickly for Konoha's liking, because he's immediately putting up his hands and yelling, "Wait, wait, wait!!"

First, to Akaashi.

"You remember what I said about this guy, right? He keeps an irregular schedule, and he'll pop in to your room unannounced whenever he pleases, and he's not the neatest person to share a space with and-"

Then, to Bokuto, with an accusatory finger.

"You should at least let him know what he's getting into if he stays here. All the clients and the late nights and the bl-"

"Of course, of course," Bokuto says with a smile, unbothered by the picture that Konoha is painting of himself to a complete stranger. He gestures towards the interior of the apartment. "Come on in! We shouldn't talk about things like this outside. Besides-"

His eyes meet Akaashi's once again before he heads into his abode.

"- Akaashi's real tired from walking."

--- --- ---

something like that... ssomething like that!!!!!!! more notes um..

i'm not set on time period but i do like the idea of 20s-30s.. golden age.. ??? they could work in a modern setting too though-

akaashi is from outside of tokyo, but moved in order to be closer to work (udai met him while he was out on a research trip and brought akaashi on as a temp editor. after accepting a fulltime position working with udai, he makes his move to tokyo)

bokuto and konoha were college roommates but it was kind of short lived because konoha could NOT keep up with the antics and wound up living w/ sarukui .. boy best friends

bokuto would have done boxing in college :]c (i think boxing suits him well as an individual sport.. + holmes reference..)

i like the image of kenma being an informant who sends kuroo to bokuto's place to relay info (because he doesn't have the energy to talk to bokuto for long HERJSDF-)

okay thats my delulu if you read all of that hiiii 😋

[hoshiina]

— masterlist

dr. stone

— akatsuki hyoga

you're a swordsmith who helps forge his spear ⊹ oneshot

you loved him from the start ⊹ drabble

01 - PDA ⊹ blurb

02 - love ⊹ blurb

hyoga thinks poorly of being in love, but he's in love with you ⊹ drabble

03 - care ⊹ blurb

you blurt out "this is why i like you" ⊹ drabble

the two of you are married and no one knows until a certain day ⊹ oneshot

04 - touch ⊹ blurb

yowamushi pedal

— kuroda yukinari

the two of you were not meant to be but that cannot stop you ⊹ oneshot

he was always watching from afar ⊹ drabble

kaiju no. 8

— hoshina soushirou

a guy asks for your number ⊹ texts

two secret admirers ⊹ oneshot

you were the one ⊹ oneshot

rivals or lovers or both? ⊹ oneshot

in his dreams ⊹ oneshot

just messing around... or not? ⊹ oneshot

if you leave me behind ⊹ oneshot

dating in secret ⊹ oneshot

you have a hard time believing his confession ⊹ oneshot

01 - paper rings ⊹ blurb

you're jealous of okonogi... and that's alright ⊹ oneshot

you're clingy on a lazy afternoon ⊹ drabble

— ichikawa reno

a guy asks for your number ⊹ texts

jealous reno ⊹ drabble

— narumi gen

a guy asks for your number ⊹ texts

it had to be you ⊹ oneshot

— others

01 - found — isao. ⊹ blurb

pet names — kn8 men. ⊹ list

demon slayer

— shinazugawa sanemi

daiya no ace

— kominato ryousuke

[daydreamerwonderkid]

Didn't realize how much I was digging green until I wasted an hour editing my blog's theme again lol

[klowncrunch]

"it's a comedy show"

This is a dumb take. Fight me in a parking lot have you no whimsy in your life. People analyze and criticize Brooklyn 99, the office, it's always sunny. You know why? Because it's public domain!!! Literally everyone is free to criticize them and if you don't like it idk touch grass?

I've been seeing this take around alot and I can't help but feel like it just will never make sense. Like you can't go on and on about media literacy and then LITERALLY discourage media analysis. People are allowed to care about things even if they're dumb fictional teenagers!

"oh it's improv of course it's not gonna be clean"

I mean. Yeah? But people can still be disappointed. It can't be changed obviously but people are still allowed to discuss why things didn't feel the best.

"I just think it's dumb and people should spread positivity"

I agree! But The opinion the episode had good and bad parts can exist.

"it's so para social to be upset at [blank]"

Imma be 100 percent real with you. Half of the time this take is horribly misusing the term para-social. If people are upset directly with the players past "maybe this wasn't the best decision n genuinely was a little weird" then sure!

"contradictions aren't a bug they're a feature "

Yeah. When those contradictions actually contribute something narratively. Which we will not know until episode 20. Otherwise people can feel literally any way about it. Who cares.

"what are the bad kids supposed to do it's the end of the world"

.

There are like 17 different DND podcasts where in the final moments a villain gets a genuinely nuanced death and it's also the end of the world. Fighting is the most convenient solution because that is what the system they are playing in encourages! I agree the ratgrinders Do Need to die but I just didn't like HOW.

"shut up and leave the fandom"

Say aaaaaaaaa open ur mouth real big

Also. So no one misinterprets me.

I am specifically talking about when these arguments are used in bad faith to shut down any discussion of the episode :0

[shorthaltsjester]

being a huge fan of tlou but also like. thinking that certain stories are built for certain mediums. like the entire theme of tlou2 is grounded and fresh because it’s a railroad/story video game that still affords you mechanical choices in how you navigate the world. i just don’t have a lot of confidence that presenting that story in a tv show with the minimal adjustments that they did in s1 will be fulfilling or compelling in any comparable way. because with tlou1 some of the like. beauty of that story was simply that it was such an emotive story contained in the medium of video games. and some of that was retained just by hitting similar or expanded emotional beats in the show, like the episodes that expanded on the life of the characters and the realities of that world. but truly so much of tlou2 emotional depth and ‘why does this story matter’ rests in the fact that’s it’s your hands on the controller, continually choosing to go forward in the story and have hope that it will work out in your-as-ellie-or-abby-or-somehow-booth’s favour. and you simply cannot get that in a non-interactive medium like television. like i do think tlou2 is a good story but it’s a good story because of the investment required by the player to keep pressing buttons and keep returning and to feel the adrenaline like responses of high intensity moments and be jarringly shifted into backstories that only increase the frustration. in general i’ve been thinking a lot about cross-medium adaptation and on the one hand i am glad that season 1 makes the story of the last of us more accessible to people who wouldn’t pick up a video game but it’s also like. maybe instead we can destigmatize video games as this inaccessible and dangerous medium a bit more instead of just . implicitly agreeing . like no maybe your mom won’t pick up a video game controller and play the last of us . but maybe you can play the game in the living room. sometimes the mediums that stories are told in aren’t just important but are actually foundational parts of how the information of a story is conveyed and that’s not only okay but is fucking fantastic. we should be happy actually that there are so many ways to collect a bunch of themes and ideas and put them together and hold them out to someone else and say “won’t you consider this with me. won’t you feel these emotions and care about these characters with me.”

[shirogane-oushirou]

i was gonna make a nice post but uh w/e my boyfie joined tumblr and he's posting a lot of mushroom photos and 80's anime gifs, feel free to follow him if you want 💕🍄

[leavingautumn13]

If you're still taking requests for art, I'd love to see Scribe Haylen and/or Ellie Perkins sometime.❤️

and works!

now i'm thinking they'd get along...

[seventh-district]

Could've left me just the way you found me, but you came and put your wings around me. You went out of your way, to fix what you didn't break.

This song is so incredibly Sam & Darlin' coded and no one can tell me otherwise.

[lots of lyrical analysis below the cut] [there's also a short little fanfic blurb of them stargazing down there too (this post got really out of hand lmao)]

For those not fully caught up, note that the following commentary contains various spoilers for Sam and Darlin's stories.

Note: Unfortunately this song is gendered, using the word 'girl' several times. Which sucks a little bit for immersion purposes, not only for keeping Darlin' gender-neutral, but also because I see this song as a duet between them, and Darlin' obviously wouldn't be addressing Sam with the word 'girl' either. So! As with most songs on their playlist, we're just gonna mentally omit any gendered terms we come across.

Side note: Frustratingly, this is one of those songs that didn't really even need to gender the subject in the first place. No part of the story or message is lost without it. But alas, many songs are like that, and so the playlist-makers of the world shall continue to suffer. [/lh]

Anyways, preamble's over. It's lyric time now yay!

Sam's Part

I was a ten-year train wreck

Technically for Sam I suppose it was 13 years, but ten is close enough (and 'ten' admittedly flows a lot better in the rhythm of the song than 'thirteen' would.) Anyways, we're not here to split hairs, (I have to remind myself), we're just here to point out similarities.

In Sam's Dec. '22 HBW, he says "For the last 13 years or so I haven't had to care too much about how I look. Seemed a little redundant after turnin', considerin' I didn't wanna be around much'a anybody anyway."

I think he's mentioned or alluded to that roughly 13 year period of time more than once, but that's the one I remember best so it's the example I'm using. There's still about 4 Sam audios I've yet to listen to as of making this post, so if I'm missing some Key Lore I'll edit this later. But for now, I don't think Sam has given many specifics on exactly how bad things got during that time. Luckily, 'train wreck' is a pretty broad and subjective term, so it easily covers any degree to which he may have fallen apart during those years.

It also feels like a very 'him' way of quickly brushing over the details of his past/his hurt, as he seems to tend to do with Darlin', (not all the time ofc but it's still something I've noticed) putting his own hurt on the backburner to prioritize and attend to theirs. Even outside of his dynamic with them, I think as a healer, it's something he learned to do. And now he does it with everyone. Put on a brave face, compartmentalize things and unpack them later, etc. I could go on and on but there'll be time for that in other posts I'm sure. For now, lets get back to the song at hand.

With a last-call longneck

Due to personal reasons, I've yet to decide if I want to HC him as having used alcohol as a coping mechanism during that time. I don't recall him having mentioned alcohol much, if at all, (maybe one mention of whiskey that I don't have time to find right now) so I don't think it's necessarily canon that he did, but it's certainly possible. My personal preferences aside, I'll admit it makes for some good additional angst. (And- self-indulgently- it makes some other songs on my playlist for them more fitting.) So, for the sake of this song, let's imagine that he did.

I was searchin', I'd been hurt real bad

This one feels pretty self-explanatory given what Alexis did, (and, if you wanna get even angstier with it, whatever his family did earlier on in his life) so there isn't much commentary to add on my end.

I HC that in spite of 'not wanting to be around anybody', he- like Darlin- still had a tiny part of himself buried deep down that was, in a way, 'searching' for someone to find solace in. (No this isn't me projecting onto them both haha what are you talking about-)

Movin' on, gettin' sidetracked One step forward and five back

This is generally applicable enough that I don't feel the need to give too much of a specific example. Anyone who's recovered or is recovering from trauma knows this non-linear, back-and-forth struggle well already, and I'm sure he was no stranger to it.

If I were to give some examples though, I could point to Darlin's (and subsequently, Sam's) encounter with Alexis at the summit, or the shit that Quinn dredged up about Fredrick and threw at Sam in the interrogation room. Those are both more recent examples and I imagine these lines of the song to be coming from a place of him prior to meeting Darlin', but still, they're some instances where I'm sure he felt like the past was pulling him back in. I'm sure that there's been many throughout those 13 years that we were never witness to.

Not your fault, I was scared to fall

This line reminds me of their 'Cuddles and Confessions' audio. I don't think he ever explicitly said he was 'scared' per se, so afaik there's no specific line I can quote, but in that and every audio prior, he was obviously hesitant to admit, perhaps even to himself, that he was gradually falling for them. Even after the initial confession, there's certain limits of his (e.g. biting) that he carries for far longer, and some that I (and others) HC that he'll carry forever. So this line feels to me like him reassuring Darlin' that his reluctance isn't the fault of them, but his past.

Darlin's Part

You were the star in the pitch black Shine the way on the way back

We don't have any canon instances of them comparing Sam to a star, but I can see it being something they'd say (perhaps less poetically, but the sentiment would be there) one night while laying up on their roof watching the stars with him. Maybe they're dead-tired, talking nonsense with lidded eyes at the end of a long day, fighting sleep in favor of more time spent with him.

"What- what're you pointin' at Darlin'?"

Their hazy focus is trained on the brightest star visible in their line of sight, arm stretched out to the sky above them. "That really bright one, to the... to the left."

Sam does his best to follow their less-than-specific directions of 'to the left', their pointed finger doing little to help given the difference in perspective. Luckily, after all these years, he knows this stretch of night sky like the back of his hand, so it isn't hard to locate the brightest one. Ghosting his fingers up along their arm, he takes their hand in his and brings it back down to earth. "Okay, yeah, I see it now. What about it though?"

"That's you." They say, matter-of-factly.

"That's me?" He questions, humor in his tone.

"Mhm." They nod with finality, blinking slow.

Sam considers the odd statement for a moment before gently correcting them. "I'm uh, I'm pretty sure that's Sirius, actually."

They scoff. "I am being serious."

Sam stifles a laugh into their hair. "No- no I mean- like... what's another name for it... Oh! It's also called the Dog Star."

"C'mon Sam, at least call it the Wolf Star if you're trying to turn this around on me..."

He shakes his head and readies himself to explain further, but they cut him off before he can start. "But no- no, this one isn't about me. That's you."

He decides to play along, finding something endearing in their overtired nonsense. "Okay... then would'ja be so kind as to explain to this confused old man just how, or why that star is me?"

Their frown is audible in their voice as they latch onto the wrong part of his sentence. "You're not old, Sam. ...Do I need to tell Asher to kick the jokes down a notch?"

He smiles at their over-protectivity. "There'll be no need for that, now. Was just a joke, darlin', I promise."

They huff, but thankfully shift focus back to the prior topic. "It's... I dunno. It's just you, Sam. It's... bright. Light. Something warm, out there in the cold dark. Standing out amongst all the rest. Calling to me, stealing my attention. I... I didn't come out here looking for it, but there it is. ...There you were. In the dark. The only bright thing I'd seen in... fuck, in years. Years of chasing fleeting warmth, tripping over myself in the pitch black, falling into... places 'n people I shouldn't have. You were the light in that darkness. Even there, surrounded by the ghost of him. You outshone it. Your warmth didn't hurt. I didn't have to squint when I looked at you. You weren't the blinding sun. You were the brightest star I'd ever seen. You guided me back home."

In the back of their mind, they recall something they once heard, something about light, and time, and distance. Space. Something about... how you can see a star that's already burnt out, because it's light hasn't reached earth yet. The ghost of a star that's already died. Only still perceptible thanks to time, and distance.

They remember Sam's words, once whispered to them on this very roof.

"Whatever your choice is... I'm not gonna live forever. I made that decision a long time ago."

They think about dead stars.

They think about time.

"...-lin'? Darlin'?" Sam's calloused hand slides up their forearm, pulling them out of their thoughts. "There you are. Think I lost ya' for a minute there... you good?"

They look up at Sam, concern creasing his features, shadows cast across his face from the light of the dying stars above him.

They reach out, pulling him down into them. Burying their face into his collar, Sam's concern grows when he feels it saturate with tears. A human might struggle to hear their words, muffled against the thick fabric, but his hearing catches it just fine.

"Don't burn out too quick. Please. I still need you here. I don't- I don't wanna be left in the dark again. Please, please Sam. Don't leave me here. I'm not selfish enough to ask you for forever, but please. Not yet. Not yet. Not yet."

.......Whoopsies! Really, genuinely didn't mean to improv an entire scene there, good god. Also didn't mean to swerve hard into angst at the end but uh. that's what came out! so I'm rolling with it lmao. Aaanyways let's move on, it's getting late and this is a song analysis post, not a fic.

Out of nowhere, answered all my prayers

'Out of nowhere' reminds me of Sam's words from the same HBW video I referenced earlier. "You came into my life like a damn wreckin' ball. There was no preparing for that, clothing or otherwise." While those were Sam's words, not Darlin's, I still feel like they feel similarly to how suddenly Sam came into their life as well. (Not in a bad way, mind you!)

[the significance of 'answered all my prayers' edges into my own personal more headcanon-y/personal/OC-ified Darlin' territory, so we can just gloss over this one for the sake of at least attempting to keep this more universally applicable]

Picked up the towel that I threw in Took in a heart that was ruined

Again, largely self-explanatory I feel. (*proceeds to explain anyways*) I imagine that Darlin' was at the point of throwing in the towel, hellbent on a solo-mission to find Quinn regardless of the danger it posed to them. I doubt they were looking toward the future anymore, (to reference Sam,) fully willing to throw themself at their problems until they really did break.

The specific use of 'ruined' hits hard here, because after everything they went through with Quinn, and especially after he recounted it all to Sam in that interrogation room, I imagine that they really, truly did feel ruined.

Showed me the past ain't a tattoo Loved me even when you didn't have to

These lines in particular make me sick with emotion every time I hear this song, because I feel like they hit the nail on the head for how Darlin' feels.

I'll be here citing various quotes all night that I feel showcase that sentiment, but we don't have time for that! So instead I'm just pointing to the entirety of 'Quinn's Aftermath' video, and leaving you with this single quote from it.

"Everything that he said reflects nothin' on you, and everything on him."

Equally Applicable Lines

And I don't know why Why you saw something in me, baby But you saw right through All the pain, and you came and saved me Yeah, I know you didn't leave me lonely Weren't the one that put the heartbreak on me Picked up the pieces It wasn't the mess that you made Could've left me just the way you found me But you came and put your wings around me You went out of your way To fix what you didn't break

Again, I think these lines are all pretty self-explanatory, and are just as accurate coming from either one of them. To me, at least, their entire dynamic is that they saved each other, in their own ways.

(But I will admit, the final verses about 'going out of your way to fix what you didn't break' are definitely conjuring up memories of Sam in the early days, literally going out of his way to visit and heal Darlin' after their fight with the two vamps. In general, his continued/repeated healing of them after they once again hurt themselves is the very literal definition of fixing what he didn't break.

But! While we may have more blatant examples of Sam being 'the fixer' so to speak, I think he'd argue that Darlin' has done plenty fixing of their own. Physical wounds aren't the only things that need healing, after all.)

-------

[shameless self-promo of my Sam & Darlin' playlist for those few of u interested enough to make it to the very end of this wall of text. if u liked this then u might like some of the other songs on there soooo maybe go check it out and maybe perhaps give it a follow so i can get a little serotonin boost or dopamine or whatever the chemical is that's released when Number Go Up. ...okay that's it i hope u enjoyed my fixation-induced ramblings! thank u and goodnight]