#blocked the WHOLE pavement
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Forgot to mention I had the experience of witnessing an absolutely awful parking job earlier and turning round to look at the driver when the car door opened, thinking “you’d better be goddamn 90 years old” and she was actually goddamn 90 years old
#she pulled up out of absolutely sodding nowhere and drove straight onto the pavement where i was about to walk#blocked the WHOLE pavement#didn’t bother pulling forwards so that she’d be in the disabled parking space in front of the doctor’s; and therefore mostly off#the pavement. didn’t even fully bother pulling fully out of the road. left like 4 inches of car suspended at a diagonal IN the road#so my choices were walk in front of the car where this crazy old bat who clearly cannot frigging comprehend her surroundings#is still sat behind the wheel; or walk BEHIND the car which would’ve required me to walk just fully in the road#the busy road. which attracts MANY dumb drivers#this road has everything of importance in the village so naturally people forget how to behave#i’m amazed no one has straight up crashed into the barriers in front of the co-op yet#anyway i’ve turned around and given a ‘what the fuck’ glance and she’s just there on the pavement with her cane like 👵🏻#well played granny. i aspire to that level of not giving a fuck honestly#personal#and like i truly do not mean to come off as ageist or ableist; but i feel like there has to be a point at which you accept#that YOU CANNOT DRIIIVE#sell the car and use the proceeds to pay for taxis goddamn#it wasn’t an old car. she’d clearly bought it fairly recently. SOMEONE HAD SOLD IT TO HER RECENTLY
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these new people that have moved in 2 doors down have not endeared themselves to anyone i want moose the cats owners back
#our neighbour in between us said everything she's tried to say hi to them they've just blanked her#you dont necessarily have to have a full convo but why just ignore them it takes 2 seconds to say hi??#and they've got 4 fucking dogs that are just out in the garden all day barking#its been going on since half 6 this morning its relentless#obviously dogs are gonna bark but not all day every day??#the kid over the road has FINALLY stopped drumming but now we've got to put up with this which is even worse because its all the time#and they're having building work done which is obviously fine no problems with that#but the builders keep parking their van ON the pavement blocking the whole thing#and sometimes if there's a car on their drive you can't get round the van you have to go in the road#have some consideration for pedestrians? for people in wheelchairs and people with prams??#and then and i still cant believe this happened#i was walking down the road and the builders BEEPED AT ME as i walked past the house and nearly hit me with the van#because they were trying to park on the pavement#THEY BEEPED AT ME TO MOVE?? the pavement is not car park mate fuck off#stacey speaks
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THIS MEANS WAR III

Dick Grayson x Reader x Jason Todd
divider by: @cafekitsune & @thecutestgrotto word count: 3.3k synopsis: Gotham’s youngest neuroscience lecturer never planned to get tangled up with two of its most eligible bachelors. Both are determined to win her over—without revealing they know each other… or that they’re vigilantes. But when the Joker takes an interest in her, things get a whole lot more complicated. a/n: I'm not fully sure how I feel about this chapter, since Jason is surprisingly tricky to write, but I hope you all enjoyed! warnings: attempted mugging & sexual innuendos
GOTHAM STREETS
You hadn’t stopped smiling since you left the bar.
You tried. You really did. Kept your head down, hands buried deep in your coat pockets, boots tapping out a steady rhythm against the uneven Gotham pavement. But every time your mind replayed something he said—or the way he looked at you when you teased him—your lips tugged upward like they were betraying you on purpose.
Dick had surprised you. In all the best ways.
You’d expected someone charming, maybe a little smug—he was too attractive not to be at least a little aware of it—but what you hadn’t expected was the ease. The comfort. The way conversation flowed like you’d known him longer than an hour. How he actually listened when you spoke, even when your words slipped into science—what Milo liked to call your “brainiac voice.” And not only did he keep up, he added to it. Challenged you. Made you laugh so hard at one point you nearly choked on your wine.
And then there was the way he looked at you. How he looked at you when he thought you weren’t paying attention—like you were someone worth listening too. Worth knowing.
You’d been on your fair share of dates—most forgettable, some mildly scarring. But this one… it felt different. Effortless. Familiar in a way that made no sense. He asked questions that weren’t filler. He listened like he cared. And when you’d said goodbye, he’d looked at you like he wasn’t quite ready to let go.
Truthfully, neither were you.
But you’d insisted on walking home alone—claiming it was close, which, technically, it was—though the real reason had less to do with distance and more to do with needing air. The space to process everything. A few quiet blocks to let the night settle over you before reality crept back in and your logical brain kicked down the door.
It was foolish, maybe—letting one good date stir up that much hope. You weren’t that girl. You didn’t do that. Even with Jake, it had taken a handful of dates (and a bottle of wine) before you’d started to soften. But with Dick?
It had been effortless. Like your heart had skipped the part where it’s supposed to check for red flags.
God help you, but you already kind of wanted to see him again. That was terrifying.
You turned into an alley—a shortcut toward your apartment. You were still buzzing from the date, your thoughts spinning, smile lingering like a stubborn echo. So much so that, for one foolish second, you forgot where you were.
This was Gotham. And rule number one?
Never take an alley after dark.
You didn’t see him coming. One shove and your back slammed into rough brick, the breath knocked from your lungs. A hand clamped over your mouth before you could scream. His breath reeked—alcohol, smoke, something foul and rotting—and the cold press of metal kissed your throat.
“Stay still,” your attacker hissed. “Or I’ll cut your pretty neck.”
Your mind screamed to move, to run—but your body froze. Just for a second. And then the fight kicked in. Old instincts reared up, you weren’t going down like this.
You forced your body to go limp, pretending to give in. Waited. Just until his grip eased. Then, with everything you had, you drove your knee into his groin.
He let out a strangled noise—somewhere between a groan and a wheeze—and stumbled back.
You ran.
Made it halfway down the alley before his hand caught your arm again. You spun, adrenaline lighting you up, and punched him square in the face.
“You bitch!” he snarled.
“Now that’s no way to treat a lady,” a deep, distorted voice drawled behind you.
Your attacker froze.
You felt it—the shift in the air. Watched his expression drain of colour.
“Hood,” he stammered. “It’s… it’s not what it looks like. I swear—”
The knife clattered to the pavement as he raised trembling hands.
Red Hood emerged from the shadows like a walking threat. Boots heavy, twin pistols holstered but clearly visible at his sides. The red helmet gleamed under the flickering alley lights, tilted ever so slightly. Unreadable.
“I saw what it looked like,” he said, voice smooth and mechanical through the modulator. “And I’m gonna go out on a limb and say it didn’t look like a misunderstanding.”
The man stammered. “I—I didn’t touch her, man! She hit me first!”
“Oh, poor you,” Red Hood said dryly, already reaching for him. “Bet that’ll sound real convincing when your jaw’s wired shut.”
He grabbed the guy by the collar and slammed him against the opposite wall—hard. The man whimpered, sliding down like a sack of garbage. Dazed. Bleeding. Breathing.
Red Hood swiftly zipped tied him for the police and then he turned back toward you, and you instinctively took a half-step back before freezing mid-motion.
That helmet turned.
“You alright?”
You blinked, adrenaline still thundering in your chest. “Define ‘alright.’”
He paused. “Still breathing. Upright. Capable of sarcasm. You’re fine.” His tone sharpened. “Which means you can tell me what the hell you were thinking. Who walks into a Gotham alley at night?”
Your spine straightened. “Excuse me?”
“You don’t just wander into places like this unless you’re actively trying to get mugged,” he snapped, jerking his head toward the man slumped nearby. “You wanna end up dead in a gutter or are you just new here?”
“Oh, I’m sorry—should I have teleported home instead?” you snapped, heart still racing. “It was a shortcut. That’s it.”
“A shortcut?” he echoed, like it was the dumbest thing he’d ever heard. “Congratulations. You shaved off what, thirty seconds? Was it worth the knife to the throat?”
“I didn’t know he was going to be there!”
“You never know,” he bit out. “That’s the point. It’s Gotham. Rule number one: don’t go out in the dark. Especially not in alleys.”
“I’m not stupid,” you growled, fists clenched at your sides.
“Then start acting like it.”
The words hit harder than you expected. You flinched, breath catching.
He paused, chest heaving slightly beneath the jacket. For a moment, the alley was silent but for the distant hum of the city. “You were lucky tonight. That’s all it was. Next time, maybe I’m not here. And maybe someone worse finds you.”
You stared at him, fists clenched, cheeks burning. Not with fear—but with embarrassment. Frustration. Fury.
“I didn’t ask for a lecture,” you muttered.
“No,” he said flatly. “You asked for a shortcut.”
“Asshole,” you spat.
“Sure. Call me the asshole when I just saved your ass.”
“I had it handled.”
That made him laugh—rough, humourless. . “You had it handled? Right. I showed up just in time to watch you get handled into a wall.”
You stepped forward, eyes blazing now. “Yeah? And I still got out of it. I kneed him first. Clocked him too. Or did you miss that part while playing Gotham’s angriest knight?”
He tilted his head, helmet gleaming beneath the alley’s flickering light. “That’s cute princess. You want a medal for being half a second away from a news headline?”
“No,” you snapped. “I want to not be treated like some helpless idiot because I had one bad night. You don’t know me.”
There was a pause—charged and electric.
“I know enough,” he growled.
You raised your chin, defiant. “Then you should know I don’t take well to being talked down to. Especially not by a guy hiding behind a helmet and a complex.”
He stilled. Just for an unnoticeable moment.
You weren’t afraid of him. Not the guns. Not the name. Not the reputation.
You stood there, furious and unshaken, like he was just another guy off the street who’d pissed you off. Not a vigilante. Not Red Hood. Just a man with too much attitude and a helmet to hide behind.
Normal civilians got scared. Normal civilians said thank you and rushed home with shaky breaths and adrenaline still spiking.
What the hell was wrong with you?
Because you weren’t scared. Not even close.
“God, you’re infuriating,” he muttered.
“And you’re annoying.” You folded your arms. “But here we are.”
Another pause.
The tension between you didn’t fade—if anything it seemed to thicken.
He didn’t move. Neither did you.
Finally, he stepped back, retreating into the shadows.
“Go home, smartass,” he muttered.
You rolled your eyes, crouched to grab your fallen purse, and muttered a string of creative insults under your breath—but when you looked up, he was gone. And yet… you felt him. Somewhere above. Watching.
He didn’t stop watching until you were safely inside your building.
This was your first encounter with a Gotham vigilante—and man, was he an asshole.
Jason had just watched your infuriating ass disappear into your apartment complex—because apparently, Gotham shortcuts were death traps and you didn’t believe in better choices—when his comm crackled to life.
“How was the date, dickhead?” Jason muttered, eyes fixed on your building.
“Someone’s in a mood,” Dick replied, voice disgustingly bright. Jason could practically hear the grin.
Jason grunted. “Answer the question.”
“It was great.”
Jason snorted. “No way.”
“I’m serious,” Dick insisted. “Smart, funny, terrifying—in a good way. Total knockout.”
Jason’s brows furrowed. “Terrifying in a good way?”
“She roasted me and quoted serotonin receptor pathways in the same sentence.”
Jason blinked. There was a beat of silence where he genuinely didn’t know what to say. Then one corner of his mouth twitched upward behind the mask, and his eyebrows arched slightly. “…Kinky.”
Dick barked out a laugh. “Right? I think I’m in love.”
Jason groaned, dragging a hand down his masked face. “You say that every time someone tolerates you for more than twenty minutes.”
“This one didn’t just tolerate me—she mocked me with clinical accuracy. It was like foreplay for my ego.”
Jason shook his head, lips twitching again despite himself. “I hate you.”
“She also said she doesn’t do second dates often.” Dick went on, more thoughtful now. “So naturally, I begged like a man with no shame.”
“Which you are.”
“Exactly.”
Jason leaned back against the rooftop ledge, one boot resting on the low brick barrier, eyes still trained on the window across the street. His voice shifted, lower. “So… you’re really doing this?”
There was a pause, just long enough for Jason to hear the sincerity settle into Dick’s tone. “I don’t know what I’m doing. I just know I want to see her again.”
Jason didn’t respond. Didn’t need to. The pause stretched, heavy in its own way, until Dick broke it.
“So what’s got you in a bad mood?”
Jason exhaled through his nose and tipped his head back slightly, gaze dragging upward toward the Gotham skyline. The clouds above were thick and dark, hanging low with a threat of rain. Sirens whined in the distance, their sound warping slightly in the wind.
“You know the usual,” he muttered, “beating up scumbags, saving civilians, keeping the streets clear for romantics like you.”
“Aw,” Dick cooed. “So chivalrous. Anyone ever tell you you’re a real catch?”
“Only in your dreams.”
Dick snorted. “Seriously though—bad night?”
Jason hesitated, gaze flicking toward the apartment window he’d just seen you walk past, you’d made it to your place safe. “Let’s just say Gotham delivered its usual charm. Creep with a knife, a civilian with a death wish, and me playing babysitter.”
“You alright?”
“I’m fine. She’s fine. Dumb as hell, but fine.”
“Dumb?”
“Took a shortcut through an alley. Alone. At night.” His jaw flexed, the muscle ticking hard beneath the edge of his helmet. “You do the math.”
“Oof,” Dick said, wincing audibly. “She’s lucky you showed up.”
Jason didn’t reply right away.
From the other end, Dick sighed. “It sounds like a usual night on the job. So what’s wrong?”
Jason’s jaw flexed. “She mouthed off at me,” he muttered, almost sounding petulant.
“So do you. Constantly.”
Jason scoffed, pushing off the ledge. He began pacing along the rooftop edge, glancing down at the street below. “She told me off, then strutted into her building like she didn’t almost get stabbed five minutes prior.”
Dick let out a low, impressed hum. “…Hot.”
Jason stopped mid-step, turning sharply. “Shut up, Dick.”
“You’re thinking about her, though.”
His hand flexed at his side. He knew exactly what Dick was doing—and worse, he knew he wasn’t wrong.
“I swear to God,” Jason growled, “if you don’t end this call—”
“Okay, okay,” Dick said, still laughing. “I’ll let you go. But I am getting the full story tomorrow. Don’t think I won’t drag it out of you.”
Jason rolled his shoulders, already turning his back to the apartment and heading for the fire escape. “I liked you better when you were getting shot at in Blüdhaven.”
“Love you too, Little Wing.”
The comm clicked off, blessed silence returning to his ears.
Jason exhaled through his nose, slow and measured. He turned back one last time, casting a final glance at your window.
“Infuriating,” he muttered.
YOUR APARTMENT
You groaned as you rolled out of bed, every muscle in your body protesting the movement. Your side ached, your legs were sore, and your back felt like it was body slammed by a bear. God, you really wished your body was sore for an entirely different reason.
You winced as you stretched, muttering curses under your breath. You really should’ve taken Dick home while you had the chance. Whoever said sleeping with someone on the first date was trashy had clearly never met Dick Grayson. That man could charm the pants off someone’s grandma and probably have her baking cookies for him after.
Speaking of…
You grabbed your phone from the nightstand and blinked against the screen’s glow. One new message. From him.
“Had a great time last night. Can’t wait to see you again.”
You bit your lip, trying to suppress the stupid, giddy sound bubbling up your throat as you responded.
Thankfully, it was the weekend. No lectures. No lab work. No coworkers to fake professionalism around while your brain short-circuited over one man’s text. You had the whole day to yourself, and as you got dressed—tugging on jeans, your favorite coat, and a scarf soft enough to feel like a hug—you already knew where you were going.
First stop: Cafe Nero’s.
Your usual. A buttery croissant and a cup of iced coffee with a splash of vanilla.
Next? The bookshop.
The bell above the door chimed softly as you stepped inside, the warm scent of old paper and fresh espresso instantly curling around you. Sunlight bled through the tall windows, casting golden slats across the hardwood floors and over the scattered reading chairs nestled in cozy corners.
You wandered toward the back, cradling your coffee cup in one hand as you traced your fingers over the spines of new novels with the other. The ache in your side throbbed beneath your coat, a stubborn reminder of what almost happened—but you ignored it. Compared to the fluttering thrill still tucked under your ribs from Dick’s message, it felt small. Distant.
He’d enjoyed last night.
He wanted to see you again.
Now, with a croissant in your stomach and your fingers itching for a new read, the world felt calm again. Almost normal.
“I wouldn’t pick that one.”
You blinked, turning your head—and your eyes landed on a man leaning casually against the next shelf. Thick leather jacket zipped halfway, dark jeans worn in all the right places, and bright, poison-green eyes fixed on you with an expression equal parts amused and assessing. His hair—black as ink with a streak of white at the front—was tousled like he hadn’t planned on being seen today, but his posture said otherwise. Confident. Sharp-edged. Like someone who didn’t mind getting into trouble—or starting it.
“Excuse me?”
He nodded at the book in your hand. “That author’s all hype, no heart. You’ll be disappointed by chapter three.”
You arched a brow. “And you care what I read because…?”
He shrugged, unbothered. “Call it a public service. Mediocre storytelling is a crime. I’m just doing my part.”
You scoffed before glancing down at the book in your hand. “Right. And here I thought Gotham’s biggest crime was murder. Turns out it’s just bad literature.”
He smirked, completely unbothered. “Hey, murder’s messy. Bad writing’s slow, painful, and somehow still legal.”
You blinked. “…Are you seriously comparing my book choice to murder?”
He gestured to the cover, a smirk tugging at his lips. “I’m just saying—if you’re gonna invest your time in something, might as well make sure it knows how to keep you satisfied.”
“And what do you know about what keeps me satisfied?” The words slipped out before you could stop them—sounding more flirtier than you intended. God. Milo was creating a monster.
His grin widened. “Because I know books. And I know women.”
You studied him more carefully now—the cocky set of his jaw, the glint in his eyes that said he was used to mouthing off and dealing with the consequences. He had the posture of someone who picked fights with the world for fun, and the scars to prove it. Everything about him was a bad boy, through and through.
He reached over, his arm brushing just close enough to make your breath hitch, the scent of leather, cologne and…gunpowder? curled around you. His body shifted nearer as he plucked another title from the shelf.
“Here,” he said, holding it out. You recognized the cover—it’d been trending online all week. “Strong plot. Sharp dialogue. Main love interest actually has depth… the kind that keeps you up thinking about them even after the book is done.”
You took the book, more to humor him than anything, and scanned the back cover. “And if it’s terrible?”
“Then you can yell at me over coffee. I’ll even pretend to be sorry.” His voice dropped an octave. “But if you’ve read it already, you know it’s a good pick. And if you haven’t—you’ll thank me for introducing you to it.”
You glanced up at him, “Well, I have read it.”
His smirk widened.
“And I agree—it wasn’t bad,” you said, slow and coy. “But it’s not her best work. Not even close.”
You state watching as his smirked faltered.
“You picked it because it’s trending. Vaguely steamy with enough grit to make it look deep when it’s actually just shallow fiction in a leather jacket. Compared to her earlier stuff? It’s second-tier, if we’re being honest.”
His eyebrows rose slightly—whether from amusement or disbelief, you weren’t sure.
“And,” you added, stepping into his space, “it says a lot about a guy who picks the easiest option without doing his homework. Because if you really knew anything about women—or me, in that matter—you’d know I’m more than capable of picking out my own damn books.”
Jason stared at you, momentarily stunned.
You set the book neatly back on the shelf and grabbed the one you actually came here for. “So, no. I’ll pass.”
Then you turned, heels clicking against the floor as you walked away, fully prepared to leave him behind in the dust of his own misplaced confidence.
“Wait—hold on—” he started.
“I’m sure you’ll have better luck next time, paperback Casanova,” you tossed over your shoulder, not breaking stride. “I’m sure there’s a girl out there who’s impressed by leather jackets and surface-level charm. Try aisle three.”
And with that, you disappeared down the row.
Then he exhaled a disbelieving laugh. Sharp. Breathless.
“Holy shit,” he muttered.
He wasn’t exactly a womanizer—not like Roy, who’d mellowed out a lot since Lian was born—but he’d never been shot down that fast, or that hard.
You were infuriatingly attractive, all wit and spine, and it pissed him off how badly it worked on him. He really shouldn’t be wasting his time chasing after you —and yet, here he was. Standing in the middle of the aisle like an idiot wondering how the hell he was going to get a second chance.
You were something he hadn’t realized he was missing lately.
A challenge.
And he couldn’t resist a good challenge.
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Taglist: @mei-simp, @sept3mberchild, @a-brilliante-mariposa, @feralwolfkat, @mercuryathens
#dick grayson#jason todd#dick grayson x reader#jason todd x reader#jason todd x reader x dick grayson#batfam#batman#red hood#nightwing#dc universe#dcu#this means war#dick grayson x you#dick grayson x y/n#richard grayson#jason todd x y/n#jason todd x you#robin#dc robin#red robin#joker#dc joker#scarecrow#batfam x reader#batfamily x reader#nightwing x reader#damian wayne#tim drake#nightwing x you#nightwing x y/n
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tiktok made me do it gf! vs tf141 bf (hurt/comfort edition)
i was spat on and essentially physically threatened by a man over a foot taller than me today, and if my husband was with me i know i would’ve been safe because NOBODY does shit to me and gets away with it when it comes to him and it got me thinking about how the tf141 boys would act in situations like this soooo I typed all of this with one hand (still in a splint) because I needed some fictional comfort even in the arms of my husband
CAPTAIN JOHN PRICE: "A fuckin' death wish!"
He’s parked just across the lot, watching you through the windshield like always—cool, relaxed, unbothered—until he sees some lumbering fucker square up to you.
You don’t even get a word out. The guy spits on you.
And John is out of the truck like a shot.
Door doesn’t even fully close behind him. He’s marching, beard twitching, jaw clenched, eyes locked on the guy like a trained predator.
"Oi," he barks—sharp and low enough to stop everything in the lot. "You got a fuckin’ death wish?"
The guy barely turns before Price grabs him by the front of the shirt and slams him against the nearest wall. Calm. Efficient. Terrifying.
"You spit on her?" he asks. Real quiet. Real dangerous. "Call her that again. Go on. I dare you."
You don’t even realize you’re shaking until he’s at your side, big hand cradling the back of your neck, checking you over like he’s memorizing you from scratch.
"Y’alright, sweetheart?"
You nod, watery.
He kisses your forehead. "Get in the truck. I’ll be right behind you."
You don’t ask what he does next. And you don’t see that man in town again.
KYLE 'GAZ' GARRICK: "shitting enamel for a week!"
He’s in the truck FaceTiming Soap when he sees it—your walk, that cute little bounce in your step—and then?
Spit.
Your whole body flinches.
And Kyle goes silent.
Just disappears from the screen.
You don’t even see him until the man’s being yanked backwards and shoved hard into a parked car.
"You wanna say that shit again, bruv?" Kyle growls, barely keeping his voice low. "You think you're hard, spitting on a girl half your fuckin’ size?"
You’re frozen, arms crossed, tears stinging.
"Move," he snarls. "One more step near her and I'll knock your teeth so far down your throat you’ll be shitting enamel for a week."
The guy stumbles off, humiliated.
Kyle turns to you, jaw tight, eyes scanning you top to bottom.
"You okay, love?"
"Y-yeah—"
"No," he murmurs, pulling you into his chest, hand on the back of your head. "You’re not. But you will be. I’ve got you."
And when you slide back into the truck, his hoodie ends up on you before you can even buckle in.
SIMON 'GHOST' RILEY: "BURY YOU"
He’s in the driver’s seat, hood up, skull mask pulled down, watching the door like a hawk.
He sees the guy step in front of you. Hears the shout. Sees the spit.
He doesn’t even blink.
You try to sidestep and the man blocks you.
But then—
A voice. Right behind him.
"Back away from her."
Simon’s just there, looming, deadly, still as a statue. The man turns and sees death staring him in the face.
"Move. Now."
The guy scoffs.
Simon grabs him by the collar, yanks him off his feet, and slams him into the pavement so fast the air leaves your lungs.
"You ever even look at her again," he says, low and gritted, "I will bury you where you stand."
He turns to you like nothing happened. Gently takes your shaking hands, pulls you into him.
"You alright, lovie?"
You nod, but the sob breaks free anyway, and he just wraps you up in those massive arms, silent, safe.
You ride the rest of the way with your seat leaned into him and his hand on your thigh the entire time.
JOHNNY 'SOAP' MACTAVISH: "SHES FUCKIN' MINE!"
He’s parked up front, phone out, ready to record a stupid TikTok with you and Gaz about your sauce order, when he sees it go down.
Spit. Words. Your whole body freezing.
He’s already out the door and sprinting before your brain even catches up.
"Oi!" he roars. "You fuckin’ DAFT?!"
The guy has no time to react before Johnny’s got a fistful of his jacket and slams him into the side of the building.
"You touch her? You spit on her?!" His eyes are wild. Voice cracking. "She’s fuckin’ mine!"
It takes Gaz and a stranger to peel him off.
He’s still breathing heavy when he rushes to you, hands everywhere, checking your cheeks, your arms, your eyes.
"You okay, bonnie? Did he hurt you? Say the word and I’ll go back over there—"
You just shake your head and throw yourself at him, and he catches you like he was born for it.
His voice breaks a little when he whispers into your hair, "Nobody does that to you. Not ever. Not while I’m still breathin’."
He drives with one hand clenched so hard the wheel squeaks and the other holding yours like a lifeline.
#kara writes#cod bf blurbs#cod blurbs#simon riley x reader#simon riley#simon ghost riley#simon riley blurb#simon ghost riley blurb#johnny soap mactavish blurb#johnny soap mactavish x reader#johnny soap mactavish#johnny mactavish blurbs#kyle garrick blurb#kyle gaz garrick#kyle gaz garrick blurbs#kyle gaz garrick x reader#captain john price x reader#captain john price#captain price blurbs#captain john price blurbs#john price#john price x reader#john price blurbs#tf141 blurbs#tf141 x reader
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truly, madly, deeply - toji fushiguro
summary: since you left him, toji has been indulging in nothing but bad habits. he makes an impulsive decision stumbling home from the bar one night
warning: post-breakup angst, mentions of heavy drinking, depression, being numb, a whole lot of angst
it’s late—too late for toji to still be out. the bar is nearly empty, quiet except for the scraping sound of chairs as the staff begins their nightly routine of wiping tables and stacking stools. the bartender shoots toji an unimpressed glance as he sets down another glass of whiskey in front of him, grumbling about closing tabs soon. toji doesn’t argue, just wraps his calloused fingers around the glass and lets the amber liquid burn as it slides down his throat. it’s painful, but the familiar sting is something he’s come to crave recently. as much as it hurts, he tries to savor the taste before throwing some cash on the table and heading out.
it’s the kind of quiet that makes the weight in his chest feel unbearable, pressing harder against ribs that have long since forgotten what it’s like to feel light.
he stumbles out of the bar, unsteady on his feet, muttering curses under his breath as he fumbles for his phone in his coat pocket. outside, the cold bites at his skin, the damp air clinging to him as the rain had never truly stopped.
the screen glows dimly, the battery dangerously low, but it’s enough to illuminate the list of names he hasn’t touched in weeks. his thumb hovers over the screen, scrolling sluggishly past contacts that don’t matter. then he sees your name. and time stands still.
for a long moment, all he can do is stare. his thumb trembles, hesitating, like his drunk mind is at war with itself. there’s a part of him that knows better, that knows he should put the phone back in his pocket and walk away. but the other part—the louder, more desperate part—wins. his thumb moves, and the call begins to ring.
once. twice. three times.
toji squeezes his eyes shut, already regretting his actions. he’s not your problem anymore. he lost the right to call you, to hear your voice, to ask for comfort. and yet, here he is, a fool hoping for a miracle at a time when no one should be awake.
“toji?”
he freezes. he hasn’t heard your voice in… how long has it been? the days have blurred together into a haze of alcohol and sleepless nights since you left. he grips the phone tighter, his throat suddenly dry.
“hey” he drawls. there’s a pause on your end. he cringes when he hears a muffled yawn from you.
“it’s late. are you okay?”. your voice is soft, groggy from the sleep he undoubtedly pulled you from. his heart breaks at the sound of it.
“yeah. -m fine. jus’….” he slurs.
“toji… are you drunk?” your voice, laced with concern, strikes a nerve. you sound just as worried as it always did when it came to him, a tone he doesn’t think he deserves anymore. you’ve seen these parts of him before—the ones he hides from the world but somehow always let slip in front of you.
“nah” he lies. “just a little… tipsy”. his feet shuffle clumsily against the wet pavement as he stumbles down the block. he feels everything and nothing all at once—silly, hopeless, in love, and heartbroken.
“toji–” your voice is soft but unmistakably disappointed. it’s a tone he’s heard before, one that digs under his ski. he knows that sound. it’s the same one you used to have when he broke promises, when he let you down, when he let himself down.
there are countless reasons why you and toji aren’t together anymore—reasons that keep replaying in his mind whenever he has too much to drink. but none of those reasons stop you from caring about him, even now. and that makes it worse somehow.
“listen…” his voice drops lower, thick with the slur of alcohol. “i know it’s late. s’probably real stupid to call, huh?”. he laughs, but it’s half-hearted, a dry, almost painful sound.
your silence is heavy and suffocating. toji knows you’re probably shaking your head right now, caught between concern and frustration. he can picture it so clearly—how you’re probably biting your lip, wanting to say something but holding back. it almost makes him smile.
as the silence stretches, the sound of heavy rainfall in the background fills the space, a constant, rhythmic sound that matches the beat of his tired, aching heart.
“where are you?” you ask, your voice barely audible above the rain.
he blinks, his mind swimming in a fog that doesn’t seem to clear. he’s disoriented for a second, now realizing that he’s walked in the wrong direction. “why?” he mumbles, a slight frown tugging at his lips.
“because i’m coming to get you” you reply, your tone gentle but firm. “you shouldn’t be out alone”. toji closes his eyes for a moment, your words sinking in, a warmth creeping through his chest despite the alcohol and the cold rain. he hears the shuffle of movement on your end of the line, and he can almost see it—the way you’re probably slipping into those ridiculous bunny slippers he always teased you about.
a small, tired smile threatens to break through as leans back against a lamppost. “don’t bother” he mutters, the words slipping out before he can stop them. “i’m fine”. another lie, but he doesn’t expect you to believe it.
“tell me where you are” you demand. he’ll take your tone over no contact with you any day.
“always so good. so… responsible” he mutters, the words slurring as his mind drifts. “you don’t gotta save me, y’know? i’m fine. always fine” he drags out.
“toji, tell me where you are” your voice is stern. it’s the same tone you used when he was in trouble, the same one you’d use when he messed up, the same one you used when you finally told him you were done.
he slumps against the cold, damp wall of the nearest building, his phone clutched tightly in his hand. he mutters the name of the street, barely audible, his words jumbled and ragged.
“i’m on my way” you tell him. there’s a brief pause before you add, “stay there”. for once, he listens. toji just stands there– drunk, stupid, soaked and numb to the rain as it continues to hit him.
he doesn’t know how long it takes before your car finally pulls up. the headlights shine bright, momentarily blinding him. he blinks a few times and there you are—stepping out of the car, pulling a coat around yourself and wondering how he’s been out here this long. you look at him, and for a split second, toji sees everything he’s been trying to drown out. disappointment flickers behind your eyes, sharp and painful. but there’s something else there too—worry.
“toji…” you sigh, a sound filled with exhaustion. he feels it in his chest like a punch. he’s happy to see you, but upset that you’re out here in the storm, chasing after him like this.
“you didn’t have to come” he mutters, but even as he says it, he stands up straighter—forcing himself to make the effort, even if it’s not convincing. his legs feel heavy, like they’re made of lead, but he tries to pull himself together. he doesn’t want you to see how much he’s been drowning.
your gaze doesn’t miss anything. he’s drenched, soaked to the bone, his clothes clinging to him, but worse than that—he’s drunk. and sad. more sad than he’s let on, even to himself. he knows it. you know it. it’s clear to you both that he hasn’t been taking care of himself—not in the way you always hoped he would.
“get in the car” you say, the command simple but firm. your voice is steady, unaffected by the storm, and it somehow cuts through the haze of his thoughts.
he doesn’t argue. not with you. not when you’re looking at him like that, not when he knows you’re right, and you’ve always been right about him.
---
the drive is quiet at first. the only sound is the soft hum of the heat, keeping toji from succumbing to hypothermia, and the rain as it taps steadily against the windshield. toji sits slouched in the passenger seat, arms crossed tightly over his chest, his eyes half-lidded as he stares out the window. his gaze is distant, unfocused—lost in the mess of his own thoughts.
“you shouldn’t drink like this,” you say, breaking the silence. your voice is soft but firm. “it’s dangerous.”
toji doesn’t respond immediately. you can see the way his jaw tightens, his shoulders stiffen just slightly. he’s a big guy, tough, but even toji has his limits. he might not show it, but you know how close he is to the edge. and tonight, it’s clear that he’s just a few drinks away from being completely inebriated.
“don’t start with me” he mutters, his voice rough with frustration. you’ve heard that tone before—the one he gets when he’s pushed, when he knows he’s in the wrong but doesn’t want to hear it.
you sigh quietly to yourself, knowing exactly where this conversation is going. you’d always had a habit of acting like his mother, trying to take care of him, trying to get him to listen to reason. it’s inevitable, really—toji always acted like a child in so many ways, and you, stubborn as you are, always fell into the role of the one who tried to save him.
“how many times have i—” you begin, but he cuts you off before you can finish.
“i know!” he snaps, his voice sharper than he means it to be. “i know, alright?”
the words hang in the air between you, heavy with the tension that always lingers when the two of you argue. you’re quiet for a moment, the only sound now the swish of the windshield wipers fighting against the rain.
you grip the steering wheel a little tighter, steadying yourself. the urge to push, to argue further, is strong, but you know better than to start that fight now. the last thing he needs is more words thrown at him, more of your frustration tangled up in his guilt.
right now isn’t the time to argue.
"then why?" you ask quietly, your voice barely rising above the sound of rain hitting the car.
toji presses his head back against the seat and lets out a humorless laugh. “why not?” he replies, his words slurred but sharp enough to sting.
you furrow your brows. he’s being difficult, like always—pushing you away with his deflection, his refusal to take anything seriously. “that’s not an answer” you say, glancing at him briefly before returning your eyes to the road.
toji turns his head to look at you then, his expression unreadable in the dim light of the car. the streetlights outside streak shadows across his face, highlighting the dark circles under his eyes, the weariness etched into his features. he looks tired—not just from tonight, but from everything.
“i don’t owe you an answer” he says after a moment, his voice quieter now.
it’s true. he doesn’t owe you anything, not after everything. not after the way you left, after the way you shattered him. you feel a pang of guilt in your chest, sharp and unforgiving, but you push it down.
“i’d still like to know” you admit, your voice softer now, almost hesitant.
he doesn’t respond right away. instead, he turns his gaze back to the window, watching the rain streak down the glass. the silence stretches between you again, heavy and unyielding, but you don’t press him further. you’ve learned by now that toji won’t be pushed into answers he’s not ready to give.
the road ahead blurs slightly through the rain, and for a moment, you wonder if you’ll ever be able to bridge the distance between the two of you.
he scoffs, turning his gaze back to the window. “what’s the point?”. it’s not a question meant for you—it’s one he’s been asking himself for a while now. you chew on your bottom lip, trying to think of what to say next, though you’re not sure anything will make a difference.
“you don’t always have to carry everything by yourself” you finally sigh.
toji snorts, a bitter sound that cuts through the tension. “yeah? and who’s gonna help me? you?”
the sharpness in his tone catches you off guard, and you flinch despite yourself. his words hit harder than they should, not because they’re unfair, but because they’re true. you left. you made the choice to walk away, and now you’re here, pretending you can fix something that might never be fixable.
he notices. if there’s one thing toji’s always been good at, it’s noticing things, even when he’s drunk and falling apart. he exhales heavily, rubbing a hand over his face. “sorry” he mutters, his voice quieter now. “i didn’t mean that”.
you know he didn’t. toji’s harsh words were never the ones that hurt the most—it’s the truth buried in them that stings.
“it’s fine” you reply quietly, your gaze fixed on the road ahead. but it’s not fine, and you both know it.
neither of you says anything for the rest of the drive. the rain continues to tap against the windshield as the distance between you grows wider.
---
toji doesn’t move after you park your car. he just sits there, staring blankly at the dashboard like it holds answers to questions he’ll never ask. his shoulders are slumped, his jaw tight. even with the alcohol dulling his senses, his thoughts refuse to let him rest.
“you wanna go inside?” you turn to look at him, suppressing the urge to reach over.
he blinks, the question pulling him back to the present. “yeah” he mutters, but his body remains rooted to the seat.
you don’t rush him. moments like these are rare—when toji lets you see him vulnerable. it’s heartbreaking, and it makes you ache in ways you thought you’d forgotten.
instead of pressing him, you wait. he’s always been a man who needs time to gather himself. and tonight, for whatever reason, he’s letting you stay long enough to witness it.
eventually, he exhales, a slow, shaky breath that seems to release some of the tension coiled in his chest.
finally, toji looks at you. really looks at you. his eyes are glassy, the alcohol making them more vulnerable than you’ve seen in a long time.
“you’re too good for this” he says, his voice heavy with sadness. it’s not just the words that hit you—it’s the way he says them, like he’s admitting something he’s been too scared to face. for the first time, toji acknowledges there’s something wrong with him. that something is his fault.
“for what?” you ask, your voice barely above a whisper.
“for me” he says almost defeated. “i’m no good. i’m just… this” he gestures vaguely at himself, his hand falling back to his side as if the effort of even that small movement is too much.
it’s clear in the way he’s looking at you that he means it. that he’s thought about this, felt it deep in his bones. you’re not sure if he’d ever admit it sober, but tonight, it’s out there in the open.
you don’t know what to say to that. words feel inadequate, like they’ll only make things worse.
“you should get some rest” you whisper instead. “it’s late”.
toji releases a breath, his gaze shifting to your apartment building. he’s been here countless times before. but it’s different now. where he used to feel at home, he suddenly feels like a stranger.
“okay”. his footsteps echo softly behind you.
when he walks in, all the memories come rushing back. the faint scent of the candle you always light fills his nose. the throw blanket draped over the couch is in the same place it’s always been. even the little details—the spaces in your home where you’d made room for him—are still there. his boots still sit by the door, his favorite mug in the cabinet, the sweatshirt he thought he’d lost folded neatly.
you lead him to your room without a word, offering him a towel and setting a pair of dry clothes on the bed. they’re his– clothes he left behind when things fell apart. you didn’t have the heart to throw them out, and he didn’t have the heart to come back for them.
“you’ll get sick” you mutter, setting a black shirt and grey sweats on the bathroom sink before turning to leave. you always fussed over him like this—still do, even now. toji doesn’t know what to do with the tight ache in his chest. he wants to cry.
by the time he emerges from the bathroom, freshly showered and dressed in warm clothes, he hears the hum of the dryer from the hallway. of course, you’d snuck in while he was washing up to scoop his sopping clothes off the floor.
in your room, you’re finishing fixing the bed, smoothing the sheets and adding extra pillows—just the way he likes. it doesn’t escape him, the way you still remember these small details.
“i can take the couch” he says, his voice low and reluctant.
you shake your head, dismissing the offer as you grab a pillow and blanket for yourself. “sleep” you say firmly, leaving no room for argument.
he hesitates for a moment, but the exhaustion weighing on him makes it hard to fight back. his body aches for rest, and though a part of him wants to address the unspoken words that hang heavy between you, he knows it’s not the time.
“we’ll talk later” you whisper as you step toward the door, your hand brushing the light switch.
toji watches you for a moment, standing there in the dim glow of the hallway. his throat tightens, and he wants to say something—anything—but no words come out. instead, he nods silently as you turn off the light and leave him alone in the room.
“thanks” he murmurs, his voice so quiet it’s almost lost in the stillness of the room. but you hear it.
toji lies awake in the bed you once shared, staring at the ceiling. the familiarity of it all threatens to undo him—the soft sheets, the faint scent of you lingering on the pillow. it’s overwhelming.
he wonders, not for the first time, how someone like you ever loved him. the thought twists in his chest, sharp with regret. he thinks about how things ended, how he pushed you away, and yet here you are—offering him kindness he doesn’t deserve.
the bed feels empty without you beside him, but as his heavy eyelids finally close, he clings to the comfort of your lingering presence. it’s enough, for now, to ease the ache as he drifts off to sleep.
---
to be continued... thank you for reading!!!
part 2
#my works#levisjinchuriki#jjk x reader#jjk#jjk au#jujutsu kaisen#jjk smut#jjk angst#fushiguro toji#toji fushiguro#toji x reader#jjk toji#toji smut#toji x you#toji zenin#fushiguro toji x reader#jjk fushiguro#fushiguro x reader#toji#angst toji#toji angst#toji fushigro x reader#toji fluff
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#i would have to go to some teenager and be like: hey uh. that's my medal actually #and then the teenager would have to go to some fucking other person and say: hey uh. that's my medal actually. #and someone would have to come up to me and take _my_ old medal #etc etc
oh yeah the funny part of all of that is that the person who got my medal liked my race on strava afterwards
wehhhhhh they corrected the race results from saturday, and i came in first in my division not second
wehhhhhhh because they gave me the second place medal on the day-of and it's not like i can swap it at this point
#they very clearly live near one of the best places in the entire country to run#like idk in the upper 2% of pleasant running experiences#(multiple huge parks park; whole-ass miles blocked to cars; flat or gentle hills; dirt path or pavement; sun or shade)#and with that access. they have some of the worst routing i've ever seen#like... intervals on a block with hard corners...#they are a real jock but what?? what???#fake jock bullshit
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𐙚₊˚⊹ bbydaddy!jk (18) ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹ *nsfw*
series m.list // taglist request: closed
note: some angst ?? but it's heartwarming... smut ofc because we are so back ! jk and oc finally kiss again (and can't stop) and so he fingers her. they sort of... talk things out??? def on the right path to their happily ever after <3
//
one thing jungkook and zion have in common (aside from being each other's splitting image) is that they’re both grumpy when sick.
last night, when zion slept over at jungkook’s, he was whiny and snappy. he cried a few times, sobbing for you (he's also been going through separation anxiety with you regardless. being sick just makes it feel extra awful). it worried jungkook since whenever zion was sick, you were always around. you were always the one to take care of him, and even if jungkook wanted to help, zion would throw a fit and refuse to let him near.
he can’t blame his son, though.
jungkook is the same.
when he’s sick, he only wants you. only you could nurse the sickness away. only you could make him feel better.
as the sun came up, zion woke up in a tired, slow mood. he wasn’t snappy or grumpy per se, but he was definitely out of it. jungkook checked his temperature (it was normal) and even added oranges to his snack box for the extra vitamin c. it’s a little chilly today; the sky looks like it has plans to cry soon, so he dresses zion in an extra layer. then, he lets you know what’s going on, drops zion off at daycare, and tells zion’s educators that he’s feeling a little under the weather.
jungkook repeats over and over again: "please call me if he’s really not feeling up for it today. he doesn’t have to be sick sick, okay? just call me if he even tells you guys he’s tired. i have a meeting, but i’ll come right when it’s over… that’ll be around 11 a.m."
at 11:28 a.m., zion’s daycare calls jungkook to say that zion spent the entire morning sleeping and then woke up to throw up.
at 11:31 a.m., he texts you.
by 11:45 a.m., he rushes into the daycare, grabbing zion’s backpack and holding him with his other arm.
… and holy shit, is it awful.
zion is kicking and screaming, bawling his eyes out because he doesn’t want jungkook. he’s uncomfortable and running really hot. jungkook is trying to sign zion out as his educators quickly update him on the details of zion’s morning.
jungkook can’t hear a thing.
he just keeps thinking to himself: fuck, i wish ___ were here.
hustling to leave, jungkook’s feet come to a halt at the door.
it’s pouring rain.
he hisses, feeling like he will lose his mind in the next five seconds. everything is so overstimulating and heavy. zion’s sobs grow louder with each passing moment he’s in jungkook’s arms. zion’s backpack isn’t even zipped up properly, so some of his things are falling out—and holy fuck, why is it raining so fucking much?
then, it gets worse.
jungkook’s car is parked four blocks away. he suddenly remembers this as he scans the area and feels even more helpless.
he takes a deep breath and accepts his fate. he accepts that zion will be crying in the car the whole ride long. he accepts that the backpack he’s carrying will be empty by the second block. he accepts that he and zion will be drenched in rain and probably get sick soon, too.
he accepts his fate.
“zion, daddy parked the car far away. i’m really sorry, buddy. can you take some deep breaths for me before we go? we’re going to get wet, and it’s hard for daddy to focus if you’re crying like this—”
zion hits jungkook’s shoulders and sobs even harder. “no! i don’t want to get wet! i don’t want you! i only want mommy—”
“she’s coming, zion. mommy will be at the house—”
“no!” zion cries, shaking his head profusely. “i want mommy now!”
jungkook can’t help but tear up. zion is burning up. his small hands clutch onto jungkook’s shirt, and his face is flushed with fever. he shifts slightly in jungkook’s arms, letting out a tired whimper. jungkook’s heart twists.
he stares at the rain pouring down, watching it hit the pavement in heavy sheets.
just 4 blocks.
he’d done it a hundred times before—walked this exact route, held zion in his arms when things got tough. but for the first time in his whole fatherhood, he doesn’t know how to be one. not that he’s a pro and has known what to do for the past three years—but he was usually better than this. he knows how to calm zion down. he knows how to hold his son and walk four blocks. he knows tough days… but for some reason, right now feels impossible.
it feels like he’s stuck.
it feels like shit.
he takes a deep breath, his mind racing as he prepares to step into the rain.
“we’ll be okay,” he murmurs, more to himself than to zion, who is now resting his head on jungkook’s shoulder. every muscle in jungkook’s body is tense, ready to sprint through the storm if that’s what it takes. “daddy’s fast. okay, zi? but i’m going to need your help for extra speed. can you take a deep breath and count with me? let’s go in three, two, one—”
just as jungkook is about to step into the rain, there you are.
“zion!” your voice calls out.
you appear out of nowhere, stepping into view with an umbrella in hand. your eyes lock with jungkook’s; they’re filled with concern but somehow steady, reassuring. it’s like you know exactly when to show up, like you always do.
no call, no texts—just… there.
thank god.
jungkook exhales, feeling the weight of everything lift just a little. maybe timing isn’t something you can plan or force, but somehow, it always feels right when it comes to you. truth be told, you have this way of arriving just when everything feels like it’s slipping out of control—like the universe is telling jungkook he’s destined to wait for you.
to live life with you.
to be with you.
to love you.
zion gasps, quickly wiping his own tears.
“mommy!” he exclaims, his voice thin but full of excitement. “mommy! come here, please! i want you! okay? daddy—it’s mommy! see? over there? yellow umbrella…”
jungkook follows zion’s gaze and watches as you cross the street.
“yeah,” jungkook sighs softly, brushing a hand through zion’s damp hair. “look at that… mommy came for you, zi.”
zion smiles tiredly, his face softening despite the fever’s flush. “cos she loves me.”
“she does,” jungkook chuckles, pressing a light kiss to zion’s forehead. “i love zion too.”
zion huffs, crossing his arms weakly before whining in that small way only toddlers could. “no. i only want mommy’s love—oh, oh, oh! my mommy—” he wriggles in jungkook’s arms, reaching out towards you.
jungkook feels the shift in zion’s body, the way his little arms reach out desperately for you. it’s as if you are the only thing that could make the world feel right again.
finally, beside them, you step forward, and jungkook loosens his hold. gently, he transfers zion into your waiting arms. zion nestles against you instantly, his tired body finding comfort in the way you hold him—the way only you could.
jungkook stands there for a moment, watching you two. a small pang of something—loss, maybe—passes through him. but it isn’t about that. it isn’t about pride or who could soothe zion better.
it’s about the way zion relaxes, finally at peace in your arms, and how the pouring rain is nothing compared to the sunshine you radiate.
then, jungkook sighs. his heart is heavy and warm at the same time. with his parents taking zion over the weekend, jungkook only really had him for one cranky night and this hectic morning.
now, it’s noon, and it’s crystal clear that he isn’t enough for zion.
today, he failed.
… and that’s okay.
as much as parenting is about getting things right, it’s also about getting things wrong. this? this is what parenting is too—knowing when to step back, to let someone else be the safe place. as much as it stings, it is also filled with relief.
zion is safe.
zion is loved.
… and in the end, that’s all that matters.
as zion settles into your arms, jungkook takes the umbrella from you. he steps into the rain, holding the umbrella for you two. patting zion’s back, you whisper reassuring things into his ears. he giggles and begins to babble about how much he missed you. he requests noodles and to sleep on the couch tonight. you tell him no, that his bed is better. he doesn’t fight you. instead, he asks if he can get a lollipop for his sore throat. you grant that request.
“nam joon just sent me here by uber… but i think it left already. where’s your car?” you ask jungkook.
“it’s 4 blocks away. should I go get it—”
“it’s fine,” you decide. “let’s walk there together. are you okay? you look kind of—”
“mr. and mrs. jeon?”
you both turn your heads to see zion’s teacher come out. she has two small containers in her hand and zion’s water bottle. she jogs over despite the rain.
“oh! thank goodness i caught you two. these are zion’s—” she hands the items to jungkook. he opens zion’s bag and puts the things inside. “... and i just wanted to remind you we have show and tell next week. i meant to mention it earlier when mr. jeon was signing zion out but forgot. anyways, get home safe and get well soon, zion!”
“thank you,” jungkook nods. “thanks for calling too.”
zion’s teacher smiles warmly. “no worries! zion is so precious to us. even when he has his days… i don’t think i’m supposed to say this, but—he’s our favorite. he’s always curious and funny. he’s kind and organized for a 3-year-old… probably gets that from you two, huh? he always talks about you two. he loves you guys so much and always draws family pictures of you at home.”
your heart melts.
“... and honestly? i’ve never seen you two pick zion up together, and my colleagues and i all talk about how much you two suit each other… seeing it in person—together? wow. you look like you were destined to be a family.”
jungkook’s heart melts.
you two laugh and thank her for her kind words. they don’t make you feel awkward… if anything, they make you smile. to be known and loved—to have people believe in you two… it’s different. it’s something else.
it’s something real.
as zion’s teacher bids her goodbye, you and jungkook share a look.
“let’s go?”
jungkook nods, follows your lead, and trails a few steps behind you.
he holds the umbrella high above you and zion, making sure the rain doesn’t touch either of you. you glance back, catching a glimpse of his shoulders already soaked after just a few steps in, his hair dripping with rain while yours and zion’s remain dry.
suddenly, you feel a rush of warmth and frustration all at once.
he does this every time—always putting himself last, always making sure you and zion are okay first. it’s one of the ways he loves; you know that. quietly, without asking for anything in return. but right now, as you feel the warmth of zion’s little body against yours, dry and protected under the umbrella, something twists inside you.
fuck.
you hate it so much.
“jungkook…” you start, your voice soft, but he shakes his head before you can say more, a small smile playing on his lips.
“i’m fine,” he says, like he always does, eyes darting briefly to zion nestled in your arms, then back to you. there’s something so gentle in that look, and it’s enough to silence you. because you know—he’s doing this because he wants to, because this is how he loves. he won’t let you carry the weight alone, not even for a second.
still, it frustrates you.
watching him like this, so selfless and soaked, makes you want to pull him under the umbrella, to wrap him up and shield him the way he does for you. but you know he wouldn’t let you. you sigh, biting back the urge to protest. instead, you adjust zion in your arms and glance back at him, hoping he knows.
and he does.
because when your eyes meet his, there’s a moment—unspoken, quiet—where you don’t have to say a word. in the way you look at him. he can feel it: the gratitude, the love, the quiet ache of wanting him to take care of himself, too... and maybe he feels it too because the smile he gives you is softer this time. a little more knowing.
you wish you could pull him closer, but in your own way, you love him back. you hold zion a little tighter, taking care of what he holds dear to his heart, just as he takes care of both of you.
as the rain pours harder, he stays a step behind, soaked but steady, and you walk together in the silence, knowing without words that love isn’t always about who gets wet and who stays dry.
sometimes, it’s about who’s willing to stand in the rain for you.
the car ride was quiet.
you sat in the back, holding zion’s hand the entire time. zion fell asleep but would shift and murmur, “mommy, mommy…”
jungkook drove carefully and often glanced back at you two. he isn’t sure why, but he kind of really loves this moment. it reminds him of the day you two were bringing zion home from the hospital.
he loves the way you are with his son.
he loves you so much.
when you get home, zion is attached to you by the hip. he throws a tantrum when jungkook pulls him away from you so he and zion could go take a bath together while you get started on chicken noodle soup for lunch. jungkook struggles and feels bad for ripping zion away from you, but doesn’t take it to heart.
zion is just like this when he’s sick.
once their bath is finished, zion comes running to you from the washroom. jungkook follows along, drying his hair with a towel. you pick up zion and set him on his chair, prepared to feed him.
from the corner of your eye, you see jungkook put his jacket on and search his pockets for his keys.
“are you leaving?” you ask, feeding zion a spoonful. “i made you lunch too. please stay—”
“i’m gonna go buy some medicine for him,” jungkook says. “and those lollipops for sore throat? does he even have a sore throat?”
you laugh. “don’t think so. we got into a bad habit of giving him them every time he’s sick though… might as well go along with it. at least they make him feel better.”
jungkook chuckles, “whatever you want, honey—”
he clears his throat.
“sorry.”
you shrug. “don’t be.”
he offers you half a smile and ruffles zion’s hair before heading to the door. as he puts on his shoes and opens the door, you call for him once more.
“drive safe, okay?”
“i will.”
“go to the pharmacy on 11th. it’s the closest and they sell the apple flavour cough syrup he likes.”
“i will.”
“the lollipops are usually hidden behind their stash of kids tylenol. so look behind the tylenol.”
“i will.”
“honey?”
“mhmm?”
“go and come back quickly.”
jungkook doesn’t turn back. instead, he smiles to himself and lets his heart flutter. biting his inner cheek, he attempts to act cool.
“i will.”
the day goes by fast.
jungkook came back with everything zion could possibly need. after giving zion his medicine, jungkook scrafed down the lunch you made him. it didn’t take long for zion to fall asleep. in fact, he fell asleep right away.
as you place zion on his bed, you kiss his forehead and take his temperature again. his fever is still high but it should get better in a few hours. you’ll check on him again in a bit. shutting the door to his door, you take a deep breath and head to the living room where jungkook is on his laptop, finishing up a few things for work.
“how’s his fever?” jungkook asks.
“still high,” you reply, taking a seat next to him on the couch. peaking over, you notice the pharmacy bag jungkook left on the coffee table. you lean forward and take it. bringing it to the kitchen with intentions to throw it away, you notice another box left inside.
reaching your hand in, you take it out thinking it’s just another type of medicine jungkook got for zion. to your surprise, it’s a box of condoms.
condoms.
you and jungkook don’t fuck with condoms.
quickly, the feeling of betrayal kicks in. how could he do this? what does this even mean? was he sleeping with someone else? or worse… does he not want more babies with you? that’s fucked up. it’s so fucking fucked up. seriously, what the actul fuck—
“sorry, i was submitting something. what did you say?” jungkook calls out.
you snap out of your thoughts and put the box back inside the plastic bag. you set it on the kitchen island and go back to join him on the couch. sitting yourself down, you inch closer to him.
“his fever is still high… but i’ll check again after an hour or two. the medicine probably just needs to settle in… i hate sick season. not only is everyone around us sick, but zion can be—”
“mean?”
“i was gonna say needy…”
jungkook laughs sarcastically and shuts his laptop. placing it to the side, he sighs.
“he hated me today.”
“that can’t be true—”
“oh,” jungkook snickers. “he hated me. he only wanted you. i felt so helpless when i went to pick him up. i’m glad you came… i’m guessing they contacted you too?”
you nod. “yeah. i was about to start this new case when i got the call. told nam joon i had to leave and have someone else take my client—”
wide-eyed, jungkook shifts. “you lost a client today because i—”
“no,” you say sternly. “that’s not what i meant.”
jungkook pauses.
then, it hits him.
it’s been like this for a while, hasn’t it? constantly miscommunicating and assuming things between you two rather than spending the time and effort to figure things out.
“... is it okay if i stay the night? i know we’re broken up or whatever but i’d really like to stay and help out as much as i can. i know he doesn’t want me around and you probably have this shit handled—”
“stay,” you tell him, reaching for his hand. you hold it tight and run your thumb across his knuckles. you press on the little letter ‘z’ on his hand. “... and i hate this. i need you to know that i hate this.”
“what do you—”
you don’t know what comes over you, but something does. it just does and you can’t help it. maybe it’s the box of condoms. maybe it’s the fact that this is the first time you’re alone with him in 2 weeks…
maybe it’s just time.
“i don’t want to be broken up,” you confess, eyes glossy. “i fucked up. you fucked up. this? this is so fucking fucked up… i miss you, jungkook. i know i’m confusing and i’m a pile of broken parts—but all i know is that even though we’re not together; i don’t want to be broken up. i can’t—i don’t want it. i can’t live without you, jungkook. this is so hard. i don’t want it to be this fucking hard—”
“okay, okay—”
“and i hate that you walk in the rain for us,” you choke on your own words. “next time i’m not bringing an umbrella. we’re a family, honey. either we all walk under the umbrella or we walk in the rain together.”
“okay—”
“and why do you have a box of condoms?” you blurt out. “do you not want to have babies with me anymore? or are you sleeping with—”
“don’t even fucking finish that sentence.”
jungkook glares at you, eyes piercing and heart racing.
you gulp.
“why do you have a box of condoms?”
he shrugs. “yoongi called and asked me to pick him up a box. he’s going through his slut era.”
your shoulders slump.
“i’m sorry i—i shouldn’t have looked and i shouldn’t have assumed—”
jungkook shakes his head. “no, no… it’s okay. this is good. i want you to talk about stuff like this with me. to say anything to me, really. i wait for your texts and calls all day… you have no idea how much i cried after we took zion to the kids cafe. how—for a moment—it felt like we were us again. god, ___… i want us again—mmhpfftt—”
on your bed, you and jungkook make out.
he’s on top (sort of. you two are laying together) and he uses one hand to cup your jaw. his lips feel soft and slippery as you reach and deepen the kiss.
jungkook slips his tongue in every now and then, exploring your mouth as if it’s his first time kissing you… and by how he does this; it truly does feel like that. he kisses you so good, it’s hard to pull away. you don’t need air. you need him and his fucking kisses.
“missed you,” he murmurs against your lips.
you smile and pucker up.
he kisses you again.
“love you.”
you giggle as he digs himself into the crook fo your neck.
“yah, i’m gonna be bad if you don’t say you love me back.”
“bad?”
“bad.”
you laugh and shift.
he pops his head back out and gives you a playful glare. staying silent, he takes that as a sign. before you know it, you feel him tugging your pajama shorts and underwear down. you gasp as he brings his fingers to his mouth, sucks on them, and then slips them between your fold without uttering a warning.
“w-wait—”
jungkook crashes his lips onto yours. he kisses you tender and soft, distracting you from the fact that he just shoved a finger inside you.
you moan as you feel him curl inside. he pumps his fingers in and out, then uses his thumb to circle your clit. you pull away from him, and he smirks as he watches your facial expressions change.
your eyebrows furrow, then they don’t.
your mouth parts and tiny moans escape your puffy lips.
the corner of your lips twitches every time jungkook hits the right spot.
it’s all just so beautiful. he loves seeing how pretty you are when you take him. he can’t help but lean in and kiss you every so often.
jungkook continues to finger you. your pussy is so wet, it’s a breeze finger fucking it. jungkook also can’t fucking look away. god, he loves watching you. he loves how you shut your eyes and murmur his name. he loves that you pout every time you want him to kiss you… which he does. he gives it to you. all the kisses in the world—he gives you his.
“what’s the matter?” jungkook teases you. “why you making that face?”
you gasp as jungkook fastens his speed. he rubs you like there’s no tomorrow.
“h-holy sh-shit!” you cry, reaching to hold onto his wrist. "uh, uh, mhmm! f-fuck..."
he lets you.
jungkook cups your jaw with his other hand and looks into your pretty eyes. your eyes sparkle with desperation—a plead if you will.
make me cum.
“cute,” jungkook hisses. “so fucking cute.”
you mimic his hiss as he continues to finger you. your stomach twitches and your hips jolt. he lets out a light laugh when your body reacts like this.
“d-don’t laugh. takes y-you like 5 seconds t-to cum when i suck your d-dick—”
as your lips meet again—this time—time stops.
the world around you two fades into a soft blur.
the warmth radiating from jungkook ignites something deep within you. it’s a gentle exploration at first, a soft brush of lips that sends a thrill coursing through your veins. You can feel his breath against your skin, warm and inviting, urging you closer.
the kiss deepens, transforming from hesitant sweetness to a fervent dance of longing. he adds another finger, earning a moan from you. he snickers against your lips. regardless, there’s a softness to the way he holds you. there’s a tenderness that belies the heat building between you two. every gentle press of his mouth is like an unspoken promise, a connection that draws you in, making you forget the rest of the world.
making you forget about time.
you responds eagerly, leaning into him, feeling the pulse of their shared rhythm. his lips are a perfect fit against yours. it’s intoxicating. the way he kisses you is a mix of passion and reverence, as if every moment spent in this embrace is sacred.
the taste of him lingers—sweet and a little bit electric, leaving you craving more.
soon, his hand on your jaw slides down to the hem of your frilly top. you comply to his hints and slide your spaghetti straps off. he then tugs your top down to your stomach, revealing your breasts. eagerly, he brings palms them. then, he brings his hand back to your jaw, tilting your head to deepen the kiss further. you can feel his heartbeat matching yours, a silent conversation between their souls.
in this moment, there’s no past, no future—only the here and now.
“f-fuck—” you pull away, feeling the rushing burn and intensity of your climax. "honey—"
“what’s wrong, honey?” jungkook messes with you. “what’s the matter?”
“i’m gonna—nghhh!”
jungkook finishes you off. he fingers you fast and hard. you lose your breath, trying to soak in this orgasm. as you reach your high, you feel it. as much as you want to tell him to slow down and stop; you can’t. you can’t because you know what’s coming—
you squirt.
“oh my god, oh my god, oh m-my—”
“fuck. yeah? that’s it, mama.” jungkook mumbles, taking his fingers out and gently rubbing in between your folds. your pussy tightens and you honestly see stars all around the room.
jungkook catches this look and chuckles. he leans in, kissing you once more. you chase after his lips when he pulls away. catching your breath, your foreheads touch. both slightly dazed, you pucker your lips and kiss his cheeks and neck. then, you catch his gaze, a mix of mischief and sincerity in his eyes, and know they’ve crossed a threshold.
it’s more than just a kiss; it’s a promise of what’s to come, something profound that lingers in the space between them.
“love you.”
“love you too.”
jungkook wakes up as he feels zion climbing into bed with you. sleepily, he places the back of his hand on zion’s forehead, but zion shifts away, groggy and fussy, swatting jungkook’s hand aside before snuggling closer to you.
you shift and reach over to feel zion’s forehead; he lets you.
“still has a fever,” you say, your voice dry and half-asleep. with your eyes still closed, you decide, “no daycare today.”
jungkook hums in agreement, feeling the warmth radiating from his son. he then moves closer to you two, putting his arm around zion. but zion huffs, grumbling in annoyance, and moves jungkook’s arm away, throwing his own over your body instead. you wrap your arms around zion, feeling his small frame relax against you.
jungkook sleepily opens his eyes and can’t help but feel left out.
“i hate you,” he groans, a playful pout forming on his lips. “why does he hate me so much when he’s sick?”
you let out a sleepy laugh, glancing at zion's scowling face. his little brow is furrowed, and he mutters, “daddy, stop. i don’t like you.”
the comment makes you chuckle. you hold zion tighter and kiss his cheeks, but he scrunches his face in irritation, clearly only wanting you to soothe him.
jungkook huffs, sitting up in disbelief. “you know he loves you—”
“i’m making breakfast,” jungkook mumbles, leaning over to kiss the top of your head. “want some coffee?”
you hum, your eyes still heavy with sleep. “i’d love some coffee,” you tell him. “... but i don’t have a coffee maker.”
jungkook nods, fully gaining consciousness now. “that’s fine. i’ll go out and buy some. i’ll be back.”
“okay,” you yawn, smiling at him. “sounds good, honey.”
as he gets up, zion whines softly, shifting closer to you, his little body still grumpy and unwilling to be touched by anyone but you. he buries his face in your side, and you can’t help but smile at the way he clings to you, seeking comfort while remaining stubbornly resistant to jungkook’s affection.
by the time you and zion wake up and wash up, jungkook has a whole breakfast spread ready on the kitchen island.
“wow!” you say with excitement. “zi, look! daddy made so much breakfast—”
“no.” zion turns his cheek. "no thank you daddy."
“no? no thank you daddy?” jungkook chimes in, approaching zion. he offers his arms and zion turns his cheek at his own father.
“no daddy. only mommy.”
jungkook hisses. “yah, zion… it’s a little much now. i’m beginning to take it personally.”
you laugh and reach for him. placing your hand on jungkook’s cheek, you run your thumb against his lips. “hi, honey. good morning. thanks for breakfast.”
jungkook smiles and leans over to you, ignoring zion being trapped in the middle. he kisses you softly.
“good morning, beautiful—”
“no!” zion pushes jungkook’s chest. “stop it. my mommy. no kissing my mommy.”
jungkook rolls his eyes. “zi, do you know you wouldn’t exist right now if i didn’t kiss mommy?”
“honey!”
jungkook laughs and playfully pokes zion. at first, zion doesn’t like it but he breaks character and cracks a smile. soon enough, he begins to laugh and reaches for jungkook. happily, jungkook takes his child and shows him all the food he prepared.
you watch them and can’t help but just feel… good. relieved and happy.
it’s been a long time since you felt this way.
jungkook hands you your coffee. you thank him and sip it. it tastes good. it tastes familiar, it tastes comforting… it tastes like it’s exactly what you need.
“oh,” jungkook reaches inside his pocket and takes a box out. “this is for you.”
tiffany and co.
you look at him, eyes wide and throat dry.
jungkook bounces zion a few times before swinging him around. he then puts him down and points to his toys on the living room floor. zion smiles and runs to his toys. while jungkook is bent down, he changes his position and settles on one knee.
he looks up at you.
“when i said that your career got in the way of us—that’s not what i meant to say. what i meant to say is that i missed you. back then, it felt like every time you came home; you just came home. you weren’t coming home to me—”
“jungkook, please understand that—”
“no,” he sniffs. “part of me fears that if i understand, i’ll agree with you—that we’ve messed up too much to fix this, that this is where we end. but i refuse to accept that. so, here’s my conclusion: even when i don’t understand you, i’ll love you through it. i will see through it. as crazy as it sounds, i believe in you more than myself. you won’t let me down, okay? i want to understand, even if i keep failing. just let me try—for the rest of my life. i love you, ___. i want to come home. i want to come home to you.”
he then opens the box and reveals the ring.
it’s beautiful.
“___, will you marry me?”
yes.
you want to say yes.
instead, you say; “what about new york?”
jungkook swallows.
“the offer is mine for one more week,” he explains. “new york is mine if i want it… but you’re what i want.”
“jungkook…”
“please,” he begs. “i don’t want to choose.”
you take a breath.
“are you asking—no—telling me to?” you ask, your heart racing.
he doesn’t answer, and silence stretches between you, thick with unspoken words. each second feels like a lifetime, the weight of his gaze pulling you in. you can feel your pulse quicken, a mix of excitement and fear swirling inside you.
“is it really one or the other?” you finally ask, breaking the tension.
“i don’t know,” he replies, his voice barely above a whisper.
what does it mean to choose?
to say yes to one dream over another? the prospect of new york glimmers like a distant star, bright and promising, yet here in this moment, everything else fades. it’s just the two of you, the air is thin (as my waist).
you want to say yes, to embrace all the hurt and finally take it all... but doubts creep in—what if you choose him and he regrets it? what if you both lose everything? the future looms ahead, uncertain and daunting, but there’s also a warmth in your chest, a flicker of hope that maybe, just maybe, love is enough because timing is on your side. that maybe, after all these years falling asleep next to him; you two dream the same dream.
“jungkook,” you finally breathe, feeling the weight of your decision. the world outside blurs as you focus on the man in front of you, the man who has laid his heart bare. can love really be enough to hold you both together?
his eyes search yours, filled with an intensity that sends shivers down your spine. in this moment, every hesitation fades. you know that whatever you choose will shape not just your future, but both of yours.
you take a deep breath, the anticipation heavy in the air, and feel the gravity of the moment.
as you look into his eyes, you see a reflection of your own uncertainty mingled with hope. there’s something electric between you, an unspoken understanding that transcends words. the way he holds your gaze makes your heart race, a silent promise hanging in the balance.
time seems to stretch like a taut string, each heartbeat echoing in the silence as you search for answers in each other’s eyes. the world around you fades away, leaving only the two of you in this suspended moment. in this stillness of you and jungkook, you two want the same things;
for time to be on your side.
for love to be enough.
for the choice to be right.
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Think You're Cute
'Like 'em Big Series'
AN: I have so many stories to write but I had to do this. Blaming being sick, m'kay? Fever has got me bad and these meds got me loopy. Thinking we need some good, silly fun in our lives, right? Plus, now that I've watched Rise, I'm hungry for some big Raph appreciation. I know I ain't the only one
Part 2
All characters are aged up
Raphael x Reader

Warnings: near peril, easily smitten, possible errors due to fever (what kind of fever is up for deliberation🥴)
Cutting right to the chase. You like big dudes. That doesn't necessarily mean muscles, either. You just love you a big man - someone with a bit of something-something to them. More to love, you know? Given your track record with the greater world, it shouldn't be all that much of a mystery. Cats? Get yourself a tiger that you can cuddle into. Jumpers? Comfort central, baby. Beds? If you can't spread eagle then you see no point. The old-age saying does declare that the bigger the better, so who are you to disagree? How true that is may be up for debate but it’s merely as simple as understanding what your preferences are.
However, this makes dating a difficult ballpark to play in. No matter how tall, jacked, or voluptuous someone is, it never feels like enough. Human biology and genetics can only go so far in the conceivably possible sense. You just want to be absolutely engulfed when you get a hug. Is that such a crime? Apparently, it is. Unfortunately, you also seem to come across the worst jerks when you attempt to date within this set of criteria. One might argue it's your karmic justice for being so superficial and picky but a woman has needs. Not those kinds of needs, either. Get your head out of the gutter.
All hope seems lost and after yet again, another failed date, you decide to call it in for the evening and make your way home. A fresh failure and another wonderful outfit gone to waste. By no means is it anything flashy but you put a lot of work into it: pencil skirt, turtle neck sweater, and a nice pair of boots to compliment the look. The whole shebang! All of that effort for nothing. This is the last time you spend three hours doing your hair and makeup. Block after block, your feet grow heavier with every step. What you would give to come across a mountain-like man you can climb who is also a kindred spirit. Perhaps this dream guy will forever be that - a dream. Men like that don't just fall out of the sky.
"Look out!!"
The sudden shout almost scares you into tripping over and you look behind yourself, wishing you hadn’t. Two very large, very dangerous-looking figures entangled in battle, those of which are approaching your helpless little self. You quickly duck as the giants hurdle over you. One falls on its side whilst the other claws and skids against the ground, regaining its balance. It shakes its head and locks onto you, a guttural snarl rumbling past its jowls. Such a creature is surely from the stuff of nightmares. An indescribable nightmare whose sights are set on you. The smart option would be running away but it's as though your shoes have melted into the pavement. Pawing into the tarmac, the beastly thing growls and lunges for you. Great. This is how you die: torn limb from limb by a demon dog. Well, assuming your clothes join you, at least you’ll look like a total babe in the afterlife.
"Oh no ya’ don't," the other one yells from behind the predator, grabbing it by its tail. “Pretty ladies are not food!”
With a mighty tug, he pulls it back and swings it as far away from you as possible. You release a shaky breath, legs trembling beneath you. That was far too close for comfort. The fight isn’t quite over, however. Just as it approaches him, the green goliath swivels on his feet, full 180, and whacks the creature's jaw with a closed fist. His speed alone has you in awe but the force is astounding, practically earth-shattering. It completely knocks the air around you and pushes you onto your backside.
When the dust clears, the first thing you see is your saviour panting, his spiky shell(?) pointed towards you. Just past him in the distance, you notice three more figures in blue, purple, and orange taking a closer look at the unconscious tyrant. You swear one of them pokes at it with a stick. Witnessing strange beings such as this isn't entirely new. Anyone who's watched Chateau Pretenche knows about the celebrity chef turning into a grotesque pigman. To describe it in one word? Horrifying. It's just whether people choose to believe it genuinely happened or if these bizarre entities exist. Being up close and personally observing it now puts your scepticism in check.
As the humanoid turtle calms, he turns to face you, recapturing your attention. A red mask sits over his eyes and there’s a noticeable snaggle tooth poking past his upper lip. Typically, the prerogative is keeping out of sight but it’s much too late for that. He gradually advances towards you. You watch him warily and he keeps his movements slow for that very reason. It wouldn’t be a shock if you were to try and make an escape. He wouldn’t blame you. Currently, all he wants to do is make sure you weren’t hurt during that fiasco provided you don’t suddenly come out of your bewilderment and run off. You have good reason to but he just saved you. Either that or he’s as ravenous as that beast and wants you all to himself. The irrational conclusion remains as such - irrational - when he descends to one knee and outstretches a hand. There’s an irrefutable kindness in his eyes; a caring nature that can’t be replicated in the face of savage brutes.
"You okay?" he asks.
You continue to gawk without a word but, bit by bit, you reach out for his offer. Your fingers lightly trace the centre of his palm before comfortably trusting the proposal. His hand engulfs yours completely and Raph hopes to mercy that you don’t realise how sweaty he’s getting. He can feel his heart beating like crazy. He wonders how much of that is the adrenaline from the fight and how much of it is being in the presence of such a beautiful gal. As he helps you to your feet, he rises to his own. Someone of his stature shouldn’t be capable of being this delicate but he is. It has you running through a loop and you unintentionally stare at the remarkable behemoth.
Quite pathetically, you nod, unable to verbally respond to his question. How can you? You are effectively starstruck. Once you gloss over the turtle-y features, all you see is the sheer size of him as he towers over you. Height, width, the magnitude of those arms! All of it is glorious. You can hear the universe asking, “You want a big man, huh? How about one who isn’t human?” to which you answer, “Who gives a damn?”. If the only way a man can be this big is not to be human, so be it.
Amidst a whisper, your mouth moves on its own, "You're beautiful."
"What?"
"Huh?" Blinking out of your trance, you realise what you’ve said and giggle sheepishly, "I mean, you're be... ba... booming! Totally awesome with the whole- uh... saving thing." Nailed it.
He blinks right back down at you. This is certainly a first. He can feel his face heating up and he withdraws his hand lest you endure the wrath of his bashfulness, opting to hold the back of his head. At this moment, he seems to look anywhere but you.
"Heh. Gee, thanks." His humility is adorable and you’re glad he doesn’t question your initial statement. He turns to you once more, regaining some composure. "You sure you're okay, though? That thing was pretty scary looking."
It’s clear that you haven’t sustained any physical injuries but even bearing witness to something so unsightly can have lasting effects on one's mind. His brows furrow gently in concern down at you and it occurs to you that there’s a soft heart under all of that shell and muscle. Bonus points. This makes you smile for the first time in front of him and Raphael is sure that the streetlights got brighter.
You laugh fondly, “Yeah, I’m okay. Thank you.” Twiddling your fingers, your lips purse up in his direction. “Is there any way I can repay you?”
He places his hands on his hips and chuckles cutely, “Just doing my duty, ma’am.”
He may be indulging in his alter ego - the Red Angel of Preventing Harm - but it’s not every day he gets paid thanks when he saves someone. It’s also not every day he gets to save such a pretty woman, either. You, however, can’t just leave it at that. There must be some way in which you can properly thank him. Ulterior motives include getting to know this already loveable lug better but shh. It feels like the odds are finally turning in your favour and you won’t let this slip away from your grasp. That’s when it hits you.
Muttering under your breath, you erratically search through the confines of your little handbag. You are certain that you had one in here somewhere. In the spare pocket maybe? Ah! Found it. Fumbling to take the lid off of your pen, you hold out your hand, gesturing for his. He slowly complies, to which you jot down a series of digits on his palm accompanied by your name and a tiny 'x'.
"Gimme a text sometime," is the last thing he hears before you disappear around a corner.
Oh? Oh. Ohhh. Wow. Getting your number is the last thing he expected. Did he get hit on the head during that scuffle or something? Was everything from the last few minutes a dream? He bores holes into the writing on his skin, scanning it over and over, scared that it’ll disappear if he so much as blinks. A dumb, wobbly smile not so gracefully decorates his lips as he trudges back to the turtle tank. He takes his seat but it’s obvious that he isn’t all there. Being so caught up in his rose-tinted bubble, he doesn’t register his brothers' voices. In an effort to gain his attention, Michelangelo jumps onto his shoulder, partly intrigued by what their leader is so absorbed by.
"Oh me gosh!” the young brother screams in shrill excitement, “Raph's in love!"
Careful not to smudge the neat ink, he’s quick to hide his hand against his chest. "That's crazy talk!”
Donatello sniffs the air and mockingly covers his nose. "The overwhelming manifestation of your nervous stink indicates otherwise, dear brother."
"I got a girl’s number!” he continues to defend, feeling his face go all kinds of red. “'Course, I'm nervous but that don’t mean I’m in love."
Lies and slander. It was practically love at first sight. He just doesn’t like the idea of his brothers knowing that. It’s easy pickings to be made fun of.
"Don't worry, Big Red. Lucky for you, you got a guy who knows all about the charm." Leonardo points both thumbs at himself as he falls back into his seat and props his legs up on the dashboard. "First, you just need to..."
The "helpful" advice drowns out as the large snapper opens and gazes at his palm again. He just can't comprehend how a gorgeous individual such as yourself could take one look at him and give him your number. It's puzzling but he supposes there’s a first for everything? That also doesn't mean he won't text you. The only thing getting in the way of that is fear. Raphael thinks he’d rather go toe-to-toe with that mutant dog again than have to face the risk of embarrassing himself. To anyone who knows him, it’s no surprise that he caves under pressure. No. He will do it! A chance like this is one in a million.
Oh boy. What could possibly go wrong?
#apologies#i am very ill#what's new#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#tmnt x reader#rottmnt x reader#x reader#raphael#rise raph#rise raphael#raphael x reader#tmnt raphael#rottmnt raph#raph tmnt#raph x reader#fem reader#female reader#silly#fluff
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Setting In A Honeymoon
Series Masterlist
Read on A03!
Author's Note: Oh to be loved. (back on my using gifs because they fit the vibes not the plot shit)
Chapter Title from I'm Like A Lawyer by Fall Out Boy
Word Count: 5.8k
Summary/Warnings: You and Ben finally get a honeymoon. Takes place about a year post-series.
Tags: Soldier Boy/Supe!Female Reader, canon divergence, tooth-rotting fluff, Ben being old, pre-established relationship, so much horniness (would we expect anything less?), smut (breeding kink, oral, fingering, p in v)
“Sunshine-“
You hold a hand up—your attention still on the suitcases—and Ben falls silent, but you can still feel his glower. “Did you pack a toothbrush?”
“Of course I packed a fucking toothbrush-“
“And shampoo?”
“They’re going to have shampoo there-“
You shake your head, turning around and moving past Ben to the bathroom. “They won’t have the right shampoo-“
“It’s fucking shampoo.” He mutters, trailing after you to stand in the doorframe, watching you rifle through the cabinets with a frown. “It’s just goddamn hair soap-“
“And you have very nice hair, my love.” You walk up to him—bottle of shampoo in hand—and press a soft kiss to the underside of his jaw. “Let me take care of it.”
Ben’s frown deepens, even as his arm wraps around your waist. “That’s not your damn job, Sunshine-“
“Yes, it is.” You give him a wide smile, and feel all his love flare in your chest. “This is a two-way street, Pretty Boy. You refuse to let me fly on a plane, I refuse to let you neglect your hair.”
“Fine.” He grunts, leaning down to pull you into a long, easy kiss, going until you’re melted into his touch and clinging to his arm. But this is the last fucking thing, we need to go-
We have time. You pull away, reaching your free hand up to hold his cheek, your grin unrestrained and a little ditzy. All the time in the world.
Ben sighs, pulls your hand to his mouth, and kisses your knuckles with a deep glare you know is fake. If it’s not in the rough affection and devotion in his chest, it’s in the way he’s holding you so carefully against his body, like he can’t bear the idea of you even stepping away. “Be quick.” He grumbles, and you nod.
“I always am.” You drag yourself away from him, crossing back to the bed. Grumpy.
Shut the fuck up. He moves behind you, almost hanging off your body as you sort through the bags for anything else missing. Tell me how to make this shit go faster.
Patience-
No. Ben lowers his mouth to your neck, and you have to take a long breath as he starts to nip and suck at your skin. I want to take my wife on our fucking honeymoon.
Your wife wants to go on that honeymoon as well, but she also wants to make sure we have everything-
I have you, Sunshine. Ben’s hand grabs your chin, tipping your head back to capture your lips with his. That’s all I fucking need.
You let out a soft, blissful sigh. Romantic, Benjamin-
Only for you, darling. Let’s fucking go.
No, I need to feed Bowser-
I already fucking fed him-
What about the car-
Filled up the gas last night-
Okay, let me just-
Your silent words are cut off with a yelp as Ben scoops you up into his arms and marches you out of the bedroom, his whole body alight with a concrete determination.
“Benjamin-“
“We’re going now,” he grunts your name, shooting you a stern glare. “Everything is fucking fine, we’ve got all we need, and you’re going to fucking hurt yourself if you keep worrying.”
You pout up at him. “I am not going to hurt myself-“
“Yes, you are.” Ben half kicks open the front door of your house. “We’re going to leave, and you’re going to enjoy your goddamn honeymoon without losing that pretty mind about what could go wrong, got it?”
“But-“
“No.” He lowers you into the driver’s seat of the car, kneeling at your side on the pavement and blocking your path back out. “Look at me, beautiful.”
You glare at him, and he reaches up to trace a careful line over your cheekbone, dragging his thumb over your lip in a way that makes it very hard to act genuinely pissed at him.
“We’re good, Sunshine.” He mutters. “Ryan’s with Butcher, Annie and Kimiko have us covered at work, and if any shit goes wrong, which it fucking won’t, we’ll deal with it together.”
You swallow, nodding slowly. “And I get to drive?”
Ben chuckles. “You get to drive, you fucking brat.”
You wrinkle your nose at him, curling into the seat. “You love it.”
“I love you.” Ben rises up to press a kiss to your brow, hunger and his raw, focused love slamming into you like a train when you grab his face between your hands and pull him down into a full, devouring kiss. Fucking Christ, Sunshine, I love you.
I love you too, Benjamin. You pull back to give him a wide, easy smile. Am I allowed to go get the bags?
No. Ben smirks against your lips. Stay in your fucking seat, darling, or you’re not getting fucked for the whole week.
You snort, because that’s the worst lie he’s ever told you. You don’t think Ben would survive not fucking you for the whole week. He’s been looking forward to this more than you’ve ever seen him be excited for everything. The closer you had gotten to your honeymoon, the more he looked less like a massive, grumpy, amazing man-child and more like a little boy who was about to be set loose in a candy shop and told to go crazy. It’s why worrying about this was, admittedly, a little dumb. Ben wouldn’t let anything go wrong. He’d refused Rome as a destination because he’d never let you fly if he could fucking help it. He’d chosen this resort because they had a very good insurance policy that would allow you to burst into flames and Ben to break a lot of things. He’d even hounded after Singer for a special permission to drive into Mexico, so that the border patrol wouldn’t get all angry about the whole supe thing.
And you never doubt him. Not for a second. Ben never does anything but what he says he’ll do, and he’s sworn that this was going to be fucking perfect, Sunshine, and he was going make you forget your goddamn name, so it would be good.
Ben was good, so this would be fucking good.
The drive is long. Almost three days, both of you determined to utilize the advantage of being supes and make it the full drive with only a few stops for gas and one night spent at a hotel near the border. The gas is easy—Ben always stomping out of the station with a prideful glow in his chest as he presents his snack assortments to you like a dog offering its owner a rabbit—and you only leave a slightly charred indent on the wall of the hotel after Ben slams you into it and fucks you until you’re wrapped in flame, but your amazing, impossible husband is not helpful on the actual drive at all. He’s still incredibly anti-GPS, and when he’s not glowering at the map on your phone—grumbling that he’d be able to get you there just fine by his goddamn self—he’s being distracting. Rubbing patterns on your thigh and tracing his hand up to just rest over your pussy, only smirking whenever you shoot him a glare.
“Ben,” your voice is a little strained, because the asshole has started to rub. “You’re going to make me crash the car-“
“We’d live.” He shrugs, pinching your clit in over your panties and drawing a loud moan from your lips. “Need you fucking ready for me, Sunshine, I’m about to fuck you better than you’ve ever been fucked before-“
“You know you’ve fucked me the most, right?” You give him an amused look, trying not to giggle as he pauses, an almost adorable frown crossing his face. “At this point you’re making up about 85% of all sex I’ve had, ever. You’re only competing with yourself.”
Something hot and bright flares in Ben’s chest, his hunger settling right in your core, and you realize your mistake a second too late.
“Am I the best you’ve ever fucking had,” he drawls your name, his hand resuming with long, lazy movements. “The only one who’s ever fucked you properly, like the perfect fucking problem you are, fucking ruined you-“
“Shut up.” You mumble, small lights starting to dance through the car as your face heats up. “Of course you’re the best I’ve had, you asshole, you’re my husband-“
Second mistake. That only spurs him on.
“That’s fucking right, beautiful.” Ben leans over to growl right into your ear, spanking your pussy once and drawing a sharp gasp from your lips. “You’re fucking mine, and this cock his yours-“
You moan, grinding into his hand and thanking the universe that this highway is mostly empty. “Ben-“
“I’m about to fuck this pretty pussy full of me when we get to the resort,” he grunts, shoving a finger under your panties, right into your cunt. “Already so fucking wet for me, darling, ready to be pumped full of my cum-“
That’s enough. You flip on your turn signal, pull off to the side of the road, and almost leap out of your seat onto Ben’s lap.
The sex is quick, feral, and brutal. You half burn through his pants as you fumble with his belt, sinking yourself onto his cock in half a second, and squeaking as Ben wraps his arm around your waist, pinning you to his chest as he hammers up into you. You’re not quite burning, but you’re lost in the sheer power of the hunger and adoration in Ben’s body, and the sound of his skin slapping on yours, the way he’s biting and sucking at your neck, how deep he’s hitting inside of you-
You find release quickly, a second orgasm rushing through your body as Ben cums up into you with a roar of your name.
He drives the rest of the way—the combination of sex and almost two days of straight driving making your eyes start to droop, so Ben flat out refuses to let you keep going—and you slump in the passenger’s seat, your head buried in his arm and your mind a little high on the smell of pine and coffee and Ben.
You get through border security fast, mostly thanks to Ben’s sheer everything. You keep your face hidden against his body as he glowers at the guards, refusing to answer any sort of question about your lives outside of you’re heading to Mexico for your honeymoon, you have permission from the fucking president himself to cross the border with weapons—you’re the weapons, plus you’re pretty sure Ben has a gun in the trunk—yes, he’s over a hundred, but if these pussies try to act like they don’t know why he’ll fucking kill them, and obviously you’re fucking married, he’s wearing a goddamn wedding ring, and it was all over the damn papers after Homelander’s death.
“Nobody reads the papers, Benjamin.” You mumble as he pulls past the border checkpoint.
“Well how the fuck do those pussies get the news-“
“TV, you old cunt.”
Ben snorts, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and running a hand through your hair until you melt into his side. “Brat.”
You only hum, and the remainder of the drive carries out in easy silence as you drift in and out of sleep, Ben keeping you tucked into his body.
You don’t even realize you’ve arrived until you’re in Ben’s arms, and he’s carrying you up to your room.
“Ben,” you push slightly against his chest, your face still nuzzled into the crook of his neck. “Bags-“
“It’s handled, Sunshine.” Ben presses a kiss to the top of your head, his words low. “Go back to sleep.”
You shake your head, the movement not at all convincing. “Wanna help-“
“You’re on vacation.” He grunts your name, squeezing his gentle hold on your body. “Fucking rest.”
God, you’re going to kill him. You love him more than life and every beautiful thing in the universe, but that’s the fucking problem. Ben tells you to rest, and he’s alive and attentive and devout in your body, so you can’t stop yourself from falling right back into peaceful sleep.
When you’re up, Ben’s body is heavy over yours, his face buried between your breasts and his arms wrapped around your waist. You don’t wake him. He looks so handsome and calm against you, his snores rumbling easily through your body, and his love sitting in content at the top of your chest, so you’ll stay here until he makes you move. Playing with his hair and watching him with a stupid smile, humming softly and letting the room fill with rainbow mist and light until he stirs, looks up and you, and meets your gaze with his own, wide and powerful grin.
“Hi, Sunshine.” His voice is hoarse, his eyes still slightly glazed with sleep, and you don’t think spending eternity with him is going to be enough. You need him all the time before, and now, and a little longer than forever after.
“Hi, Benjamin, my love.” You lean down to kiss his nose, and he makes a low, grunting noise that goes right to your core. “Thank you.”
He frowns. “I didn’t do fucking shit-“
“You’re here.” You whisper. “You’re taking care of me.”
“That’s my goddamn job-“
“And I’m still thanking you.” You hold his face between your hands, shifting slightly up to he every angle of him impossible handsome face. “I love you-”
The sound that Ben makes is low and primal, and you cut yourself off with a gasp as he flips you over, kissing you into the mattress and rutting into you until you’re writhing under him, scraping at his arms for more.
“Ben-“
He starts to trail sloppy kisses over your whole face, smirking as you let out another strangled moan. “You’re fucking perfect, Sunshine, fucking love you, so goddamn good-“
You whimper as he pins you to the bed with his hips, his mouth trailing down to your neck, over your collarbone, and his hand pushing between your bodies to rub fast, strong circles on your clit.
“So fucking beautiful, already fucking wrecked.” He growls against you, and you can only whimper. “Cum for me, darling, soak my fucking hand-“
You cum with a scream, and Ben groans as he jerks against you, something warm spreading over his boxers as he buries his face in your neck, his own orgasm sending a small, shivering one into your body.
“Did you just-“
“Shut the fuck up.” He grunts, nipping at your skin as he flicks your clit once, your back arching off the bed at the movement. “You’d cum like that as well, if you could see how fucking perfect you are.”
You giggle, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. “Grumpy-“
“I said shut the fuck up.” He growls, and you just hum, still smiling like an idiot. God, you fucking love him.
It takes an hour for you to get out of bed, and then another two to leave the room. Ben will grumble something that makes you jump on him, and then you smile at him and he’ll pin you to the mattress, or the wall, or just hold you up in his arms as he fingers you in the middle of the room. He tries to get changed and you fall to your knees to take his cock into your mouth. You bend over to pick something up and he drives himself into your cunt from behind. The only reason it ever comes to an end is because your stomach growls, Ben’s head shoots up from between your thighs, and you’re suddenly being dragged down to the lobby for breakfast.
The day from there is slow and lazy. Wandering around with no destination, Ben’s hand tangled naturally in yours, acting like you can’t see the people silently watching you with whispers and wide eyes. You’d expected it, but it’s still strange, and you’re more than happy to let Ben handle it whenever someone crosses a line. Mostly it’s just the stares, but one very drunk man tells you he could give you cock better than any old Hollywood asshole, and you have to act like it doesn’t make you ache for Ben when he draws to his full height, puffs out his chest like a lion, and hisses that he’s the only fucking asshole in the world that could handle you, because you burn this pussy to fucking charcoal in a second. Then a rich finance dick tries to get Ben to invest in his crypto business, and you get to smile like a dummy as Ben snaps that his wife thinks crypto is stupid as fuck, and she’s smarter than this fucking idiot by a goddamn mile. The best one is when a very stupid woman comes up to Ben and tell him he deserves a real, truly American woman, and you get to watch him go tense and—pulling you so close you think he’s worried you’ll vanish into thin air—sneer that he’s already got the best fucking woman in the goddamn world.
But outside of these sparse moments, it’s all so fucking easy. Ben flat out refuses to wear a Hawaiian shirt because he’s not goddamn Butcher, but you get him into a loose, white linen one that makes you almost climb on top of him in the middle of a very crowded shopping center. He buys you flowers—shoving them into your hands with a low grumble of for you, beautiful and a radiant glow blooming over his ribs—and then tucks one behind your ear with a grin, looking at you like you’re holy. There are a few moments when you have to slap him for saying things that really do prove he’s a hundred years old, but you’d expected that. You know who you psychically bound yourself to for eternity, and it’s a grumpy old man who frowns as you explain why he can’t say that, then nods and never says it again. He doesn’t apologize—Ben so rarely apologizes, and it’s only ever to you and Ryan—but he learns, and he tries, and you love him even more.
It’s only when you go to the beach and you remember why you’d try to talk him out of honeymooning anywhere near the ocean, that the day comes to a crashing halt in the best way possible.
Ben shouldn’t be allowed near a beach. His skin glows golden, and his eyes look greener than the sea, and his bare chest is broad and muscular and covered in a light layer of sweat that you want to taste-
“You’re drooling, Sunshine.” He mutters in your ear, and your knees almost give out from the force of the want in his body. “You need something?”
You swallow, looking up into his lust-blown eyes, and your voice is soft and breathless. “Ben-“
“Fucking Christ,” he grunts you name, spinning your body to fully press into his, his hands drawing rough patterns on your hips. “You’re so fucking beautiful, darling, driving me fucking insane, want to fuck you until everyone can see that you’re mine-“
And that’s enough. You grab Ben’s wrist, spin on your heels, and drag him after you as you half-run back to the hotel.
You make it about ten steps before Ben pulls you back into his arms, picks you up without breaking pace, and marches you back to the room.
You’re barely through the door when you squirm in his hold, reaching down to palm at his bulge over his shorts. Ben groans right in your ear, his grip on your body tightening, and you grin as he twitches at your touch. You manage to twist in his arms, offering yourself more access to slip your hand right into his trunks, wrapping your hand around his thick cock and start to jerk him off with slow, teasing movements
Ben growls, prying you off his body to lower you onto the mattress, standing above you with a stern glare you can feel right in your pussy.
“Jesus, beautiful,” he grunts, tangling your hair in his fingers, tracing your parted lips with his thumb. “Such a needy fucking brat, need to be damn careful-“
“Or what?”
His throat bobs, and you feel the glow over his ribs grow starved, all of it focused into you, and he says your name in a low warning. “You’re- Fuck,tell me what you want, brat.”
You run your hand up his thigh, making your eyes big and pleading, letting little bit of your sheer desire leak into Ben’s body. “Want you, my love. Want your cock filling me up.”
“Fuck.” He grunts, his jaw clenching as you pull down his shorts. “Want me to fuck your mouth, Sunshine? Want me to feed you with my cock until you’re begging for more-“
You know Ben. He’ll keep dirty talking and taunting you until you either fold into him and start begging before you even taste him, or you explicitly tell him want your big cock on my tongue, Ben, please.
And you might have said that between your minds, because Ben’s grip on your hair does tighten, but it doesn’t matter because you’re not bothering to wait. You take Ben into your mouth in one motion—until your nose is pressed to his abdomen and the head of him is bumping the back of your throat—and look up at him under hooded eyes.
He’s holy. He looks feral—his eyes almost wholly black and his full mouth parted as he stares at you—and a low growl escapes his chest as you hollow your cheeks, lick the underside of his cock, and speak in a needy, high plea into his mind. Fuck my mouth, Ben, please-
You moan as he tugs you almost fully off of him, lets you flick your tongue against the weeping slit of his cock, and shoves your back down until you’re gagging.
He pauses, his grip loosening slightly as his stone-like concern wraps over your skin, and his voice is strained from above you. “You-“
I’m good. You reach a hand to play with his balls, making your eyes soft and pleading when you look back up at him. Please, just fuck my mouth-
“Fuck.” He groans, repeating the same movement from before, once, twice, over and over until you’re drooling on him, your fingers on his balls light and uncontrolled as you grow cockdrunk. “You’re fucking perfect, Sunshine, goddamn beautiful choking on my cock, pretty lips made to be wrapped around my fucking dick, making sounds like fucking music, sucking on me like a fucking brat, so fucking good-“
You whine around him, your thighs rolling as you try to bunch the sheet between them, and Ben chuckles, the sound raspy and hoarse and shooting through you like lightning.
“Need some help, beautiful? Got a fucking problem, so fucking wet and desperate for me, just from sucking my fucking cock like a good fucking girl-“
God, he can’t be allowed to speak during sex. You’ll never be able to stop him—it would be downright cruel to your pussy, pulsing and grinding against nothing, soaked just from the deep sound of Ben’s voice—but he’s going to make you lose your mind.
Ben, you moan between your heads, and his dick jerks, heavy on your tongue. Please, need you so bad-
He pops you off of him, angles your head up to hold his gaze, and you whine at how fucking good he looks. How his chest is heaving, and his eyes are pulling you apart under him, how he drags you up to crash into him halfway, making you moan down his throat from his demanding kiss.
“Fucking love you,” he grunts your name, biting on your lower lip and smirking as you start to try and climb up his body. “Want to fill you up, Sunshine-“
You nod franticly, squirming against him. “Fuck, yes, yes please-“
“You want my fucking cum, beautiful?” Ben growls, and when you glance down you don’t miss the way his own words are making his cock jump against nothing. “Need me to stuff that pretty pussy full of me, mark you up with me-“
“Yes,” your moan is shameless, because god, you’ll give him whatever he asks for, and take anything he offers you. “Please, Ben, fuck me, want your cock, want your cum-“
You gasp as Ben rips off your fully ruined swimsuit, tosses you back on the mattress, and shoves your thighs apart with rough hands.
“So fucking wet,” he mutters, running two fingers between your folds, looking up at you with an awe and love that feels slightly out of place for how he’s plunged those two fingers inside you, crooked them in your cunt, and started to rub right against that deep, desperate spot. “Squirt on my hand, darling, need you fucking soaked for my cock-“
Your body obeys his command without thought, and cum with a choked gasp of Ben.
“There you go,” he growls, scissoring his fingers as your back arches off the bed, keeping his movements careful and measured as he drags you through your orgasm. “Good girl, so fucking good, just for me-“
Just for you, Ben, please. You grab at his wrist with a slack grip, grinding helplessly against his hand. Please, fucking please, my love-
He pulls his fingers away, flicking your clit once and smirking at your high whine before positioning himself between your legs, slowing pumping himself as he scans over your flushed body.
“Beautiful,” he mutters, and it seems to be mostly to himself. “Fucking perfect, love you so fucking much, Sunshine, you don’t have a goddamn clue-“
You have sort of a clue—he does tell you that about five times a day—but your words and mind are lost in a daze of Ben, so all you do is reach pathetically up for him, spreading your legs wider with a sound of need to beg him to just take you. Just fuck you like no one else can, like no one else ever could.
“Christ.” He grunts, shaking his head slightly. “You’re- fuck-“ Ben doubles over with a groan as you raise your arms over your head, your legs splayed fully apart in a silent plea.
Benjamin. You take a long, heavy breath, rolling your hips for him with your best sweet, pleading gaze. Fuck me.
The sound that leaves Ben might be the deepest you’ve ever heard, and his voice is downright animalistic as his hand trails over your abdomen and inner thighs, sending a shiver through your spine.
“Arms stay up.” He orders, and you nod, moaning as Ben crawls over you, lining himself up to shove into your needy cunt. “Don’t stop looking at me.”
You barely have a moment to hum an agreement before Ben shoves into you, and everything turns into an intoxicating haze of Ben. He’s hiked your leg over his waist to push deeper into your cunt, the tip of his cock slamming into your cervix, and trailed a hand up your arms to pin your hands to the bed, leaving you open and vulnerable for him to use.
And fuck, he’s using you. Ben’s thrusting his cock into you at a feral pace, his mouth biting and sucking everywhere he can reach, pulling you so high you can only moan and whimper his name as he ruins you.
“So fucking perfect, darling,” he groans against your throat, and you throw your head back with a high whimper. “Gonna fuck you full, fill your perfect fucking pussy with my cum, get you fucking round and beautiful with my baby, show the world how good I fuck my wife, how fucking desperate you are for my cock-“
You make a high, breathy noise, writhing under Ben’s touch as his free hand moves to roll your nipple between his fingers. “Fuck, Ben-“
“Say my name, Sunshine, fucking scream so everyone knows you fucks you right, tell the whole damn hotel who you belong to-“
“Ben!” You can’t remember any other words as he moves his hips in a circle, angling you a little higher to somehow hit deeper inside of you. You can’t touch him—your hands still trapped over your head—but he’s so good, and you’re so full, and fuck, you might be crying with pleasure as he bites on your shoulder, and you know whatever mark he leaves will fade in a second but god, you want it to stick-
“Fuck,” Ben hisses your name as you squeeze around him, and your eyes roll back in your head as his hand snakes between your bodies and he starts to circle around—but never on—your clit. “You’re so fucking good, beautiful, tight and warm, wrecked on my cock, you’re perfect, love you so fucking much-“
“Ben,” you trying to keep your eyes on him, his face filled with a zealous care and hunger, but fuck you need to come so bad. “Ben-“
“All goddamn stupid when I fuck you, smart fucking mouth all, fuck-“ Ben kisses you into the mattress with a brutal force, shoving his tongue down your throat as his thrusts grow sloppy. Christ, need to cum in you, darling, you’re- Fuck- Ben’s hips stutter and you squeak down his throat. Cum with me, Sunshine-
You let go with a scream right as Ben pinches your clit, and he slams home with a roar of your name. You feel his warm cum spread inside you, leaking slowly down your thighs as he pulls out, and when Ben drops his weight carefully down over you—his head resting on your chest as you move your arms to wrap around his neck—you hum in happy, fucked out, empty-minded content.
“You’re really having a lot of fun with the baby thing, my love.” You mumble, and Ben rolls his eyes.
“You fucking love it.” He pauses, something sore settling over his skin as he frowns up at you, and you can’t stop the small smile crossing your face at the stone like protection wrapping around your body, Ben’s grip on you tightening like he’s trying to protect you from ghosts that never exist when he’s at your side. “You-“
“I do love it.” You whisper, leaning down to give him a soft kiss. “I love you.”
He grunts. “You’re fucking certain-“
“Positive.” You smile against his lips. “With you, Benjamin, I’m always positive.”
His nostrils flare slightly, and everything fades back into furious, bloody, unwavering love in his body. “Then we’ve got a goddamn week to make sure it happens, Sunshine.” He growls, rolling his already semi-hard cock against your thighs. “You’re going to look so fucking beautiful when I get it to stick.”
He always avoids the words when you’re not actively fucking, and youknow why. Ben never seems to fully trust that you’re really ready for this. Not because he doesn’t trust you, not because he doesn’t want it more than you do—if the way he flares and bursts over your ribs at the very mention of it isn’t proof, the way that you’ve caught him staring at baby cribs and clothing when you walk through Costco is—but because he’s a stubborn, protective, amazing asshole who values your comfort above everything else in the world. Once a douchebag congress member accused you of illegally aborting Homelander’s baby, and Ben interrupted the hearing to hold your cold, frozen body against his chest and roar some of the most violent threats you’ve ever heard at the committee.
But Ben’s not Homelander. He’s the furthest thing from Homelander. He’s the light that’s dancing over the room as you lay in his arms, and the whole world inside your body, and the best thing that’s ever happened to you in your life. He gives you everything, and more, and the only thing that could ever be better than him is what you could offer him.
The only person in the whole world who, after everything, could ever want to offer that.
So you smile at him, playing with the hair of his beard, and crane your neck to whisper against his lips. “When you fuck me full of a baby, Benjamin? When you get me pregnant?”
Ben stiffens, his cock already hard once more and prodding against your thigh, his voice so low you almost cum on the spot. “Christ on a fucking cross,” he mutters your name, ardor and a fervorish, wrathful reverence exploding in his chest, all aimed at you. “You’re going to fucking kill me-“
“No, I won’t.” You grind up into him, and he hisses. “But I am going to let you fuck me stupid, Pretty Boy, let you fill me up with your baby-“
Your blatant bait works. Ben sits up in a sharp movement, pulling you with him, and impales you back on his cock in one, smooth movement.
“Such a fucking brat.” He grunts in your ear, his hands on your hips holding you still, forcing you to just fall into his warmth and clench desperately around him. “You want my cum, beautiful?”
You nod stupidly, and he smirks.
“Words-“
“Want it, Ben.” You moan, clinging to his body. “Want you.”
“You’ve got me, Sunshine.” He mutters, squeezing your ass with a firm hand. “Now be a good girl and take me.”
You half-scream as he starts to move, and you could be happy dying here. With a husband that loves you with such a raging strength, who fucks you so good that all you can do is grow slack in his hold and let him abuse your cunt until you’re his in every way possible.
And you already are. He’s alive inside of you, and molded into you, and wears a matching ring to yours that you think he’d sear into his skin if he could.
But God, it will never be enough. Ben is more than enough, but you’ll never be satiated of him.
You could never be satiated of him.
And that’s why, when he cums into you again, you really do hope it sticks. Because the only thing could ever be better than Ben was a bright-eyed, cared for, happy bundle of evidence that you belong to each other forever. A child that will never know the pain you and Ben have held each other through, because Ben doesn’t allow people he loves to be in pain.
And he really deserves more people to love. His own piece of proof that you trust him more than you trust yourself, that he’s repented and you’ll offer him a million smiling children for everything he’s done for you. For how well be cares for you, and how well you know he’ll care for them. For how it will be hard, but worth it, because you’ve bled for less and cried for more.
And no matter what any form of family comes, you’d never want it with anyone but Ben.
End Note: God please send me someone who's as down bad for me as Ben is for Her.
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Stark Contrast 1
No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, lies, age gap, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: your online friend isn't who he claims to be.
Characters: Tony Stark
Sister series to Captain's Orders
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
It's been a long day. Every day seems longer than the last. All that overtime is adding up. It's needling right at the base of your neck.
Unclench your jaw. You keep forgetting. The pressure makes your head hurt. You rub your eye socket and yawn as you drag your feet down the dark pavement.
You approach your building and look at the heel of your hand, mascara smeared on your skin, no doubt across your face too. Oh well, you're home. Not necessarily the perfect haven but a place to be alone.
You bob in the elevator to the music in your headphones. You step off and keep your head down in a lazy shuffle down the hallway. You unlock your door and spin inside, letting the song play out as you hang your jacket and purse. You kick of your sneakers and drift into the kitchen, mindlessly searching for something quick to eat.
You detach your headphones from your phone and take them off. You let the music drone as you mull over the effort to cook a box of processed mac and cheese. You pause the music and scroll through your feed. Nothing interesting. You let a live feed play. You never pay much attention to the new but it's good white noise.
You pull down your notification bar. Oh shoot. You forgot to answer the last message.
You'd been chatting with Eddie during your lunch but had to get back to the grind. Those bougie middle-aged women won't find those overpriced candles themselves. Then they'll complain that the Martha Stewart limited edition is sold out. Oh, to have such simple problems.
You blink as the video plays in a little box floating over the chat.
'Sorry. Got caught up at work. Just seeing this now. Hope you have a good night.' You send the message and pull the video into fullscreen.
He doesn't always answer at night. Or sometimes for days. He's pretty busy. An engineer or something. You met on some discord when Elden Ring dropped.
You narrow your eyes at the stream. You swear every time you see a screen, Tony Stark is on it. There he is now, giving a presser to a fawning crowd of reporters.
He claps his hand to his chest pocket and gives a subtle look down as he slides out his phone. He drops it back in and shrugs at his adoring audience, "I'm a busy guy, what can I say?"
They laugh, unbothered by his distraction. You turn back to your search for an easy meal. Oh, you still have that frozen pizza. This late, it'll make your chest burn in the morning but you don't care.
You preheat the oven and go to your phone, agitated by the murmur of the reporters and their softball questions. You don't have a problem with the man or his mighty band of Avengers, hey, they do their best. It's this whole celebrity shell around them. The sort that has half the population is a dysfunctional parasocial relationship.
You switch to a reality show that pits home bakers against each other. It's a bad choice. It stokes your already twisting hunger and sparks your sweet tooth. You never shy away from a treat. Good thing you don't have any.
The stove beeps as the subtle smell of smoke rises. You figure it's not that bad if the alarm isn't going. You put the pizza in and swipe up your phone. You pace around and check your news feed. There's a new Amiibo out. Nope, you will not get suckered into another money grab. You're save. Not for anything special, just rent. Another price hike. The next one might put you out.
You pizza finishes and your phone buzzes. You cut it into uneven slices and take a few on a paper towel. You flop onto the couch and read Eddie's response.
'I get it. Probably out on a date with a hot guy. Or lady. No judgment.'
You shake your head. He's such and idiot sometimes. 'Nah. You're awake?'
'You know I don't sleep.'
You wouldn't guess it by his erratic responses. If anything, you'd only assume he doesn't keep a routine. His bouts of activity are unpredictable.
'Let's not talk about work.' He replies before you can. The next message is a mood. 'I'm over it.'
'Sure. What do we talk about? You gonna help me co-op Starscourge Radahn? You never log on anymore.'
Your phone quakes as an audio call comes in. You nearly drop it as you opt to save the slice of pizza in your other hand first. You finally hit answer with your greasy thumb.
"Fair warning, I'm eating. I'm flipping starving," you say.
"You sound ravenous," Eddie says. "So, what's for... a very late dinner?"
"Pizza. Spinach and mozzarella."
"Order in?"
"Frozen," you mutter.
"Gross," he remarks. He's a bit of a snob. "You coulda hit me up. I'd send you some money for real food. I'm sure you've got a few shwarma places around that hellhole."
"Har har. If I'm so poor, why do you talk to me?"
"Good question. Can I think about it?" He snickers as you roll your eyes. "Look, sweetheart, I'm sorry about the video game--"
"You know, you sound like my dad."
"I do?" He nearly yelps.
"Sweetheart this. Video games. You talk like you were born in the 60s."
"I heard the 60s were pretty hip," he laughs.
"Hip? Oh you're definitely a catfish," you tease.
"How do I know you're not some desperate housewife using me for kicks?" He accuses.
"I sent you pics," you say.
"I've sent mine too," he retorts. "Alright, only solution here is to admit we're both catfish. You want me to order you good food and I want... uh, well, you're a good distraction."
"A good distraction? That's it?" You huff. "Thanks, Ed."
"I'm playing. You know I like you. I was just on my way to meet this tall blonde and I called you instead."
"Sure you were," you hiss. "You know, I had too long a day for you to be so annoying."
He cackles. You smile, just a bit. He really can be a butt. You don't know why you talk to him.
"How's the pizza? You want me to order you some real stuff yet?"
"Eddie," you sigh. It's a nice offer but you're not stupid. You don't give people on the internet your address. "That's too much."
"It's really not," he insists.
"To me it is." You drop the pizza and paper towel on the lone TV table by your ratty sofa. "You know, I get it, you're trying to be nice, but... you just kinda make me feel..."
"What? I make you feel... some sort of way, so that's good, right?"
"Ugh, don't. I get it, alright? I'm poor. Trash," you cross your arms and sit back. "Go and meet the tall blonde and have your fancy five star dinner."
He's quiet, "I was only messing with you."
"Well, maybe you should stop," you say as you sit forward and talk directly into your phone. "You obviously don't have the time for me. And a lot more important friends so--"
"Hey, come on, it's a joke--"
You hit end and toss your phone to the other end of the couch. You already know you overreacted. Shoot. Ugh.
It's just that stupid woman today, yelling at you over a bunny ornament, like the fact that is was put on the wrong shelf is your fault. You organise the shelves constantly but people don't care. They don't read either.
Your phone jitters again. You ignore and get up. You pack away the leftover pizza and put it in the fridge. That's your dinner for tomorrow, if not the next day.
God, why does he have to rub his money in your face? His super fun life. He went to Tokyo last week on a work trip.
You're a bitch. Insecure at that. It's probably best you cut free now. You wouldn't want to project all that on him. Besides, it's starting to feel like he only talks to you to make himself feel better. He shouldn't need that much help.
❤️
It's your own fault. You know it. Your worst and best trait is your crippling self-awareness. You know what you are, how you are, but it doesn't make it better.
You feel bad. You always do. Even if you're right, you feel rotten. You just don't like being like that. And what did Eddie do but joke around?
Did he have to keep offering to pay for you? Or mention that tall blonde?
Sigh. Just focus. You go back to putting the throw pillows back into the display basket. You watched a pair of kids toss them around for the last hour.
Life isn't easy and you should stop expecting it to be. That's your problem. You can't settle for what you have.
Julie, your manager comes by as you set the last of the pillows on those nearly overflowing the basket. You smile. She scowls.
"Your name tag's upside down," she points to your chest.
You look down. Oh jeez. You flip it around.
"Dress code infraction. Next time, I'll write you up." She warns.
"Sorry," you frown.
"There's customers. Smile."
As if one cue, the automatic doors open. You busy yourself with the next display, as if the napkin rings are that interesting. Julie snaps her fingers at Casey. He sniffs and tries to act like he didn't smoke up before he punched in.
"You're the greeter. Mind doing some greeting," she hisses.
"Oh, yeah," he stands and struts away from the lawn chair display, "hey, dude, like, hi. Welcome to The Home Hub. Anything I can help you-- woah, no way."
He starts laughing. You peek over your shoulder as Julie sighs. Casey coughs and clears his throat, "bro, am I high or is this dude Iron Man?"
You turn and narrow your eyes at the man. Goatee, sunglasses, a nice suit. He bears a striking resemblance to the man behind the podium at he presser the night before. You tilt your head. That's impossible.
"Casey, go to the warehouse and start downstocking," Julie sneers as she stomps forward. "I'm so sorry, sir. We-- Oh, oh. Oh my god, it is him."
She swoons and fans herself. Your eyes go wide as you give a goof smile. She's ridiculous.
"Hey, sweetheart," he purrs at her. "I'm looking for uh, a..." he takes off his sunglasses and glances around, "a bath mat."
"Bath mat? Uh. Oh, er..."
"You," he points in your direction. You turn to look for someone else behind you. "Show me."
You face him and Julie gives you a crazed sneer. You step away from the napkin rings. "Sure, uh, sir, they're in the back."
"Amazing," he winks as he approaches. There's something about his cadence. You never noticed on the screen, but it's familiar?
"Tony Stark, but I'm sure you already know," he says as he comes up next to you.
You continue down the centre aisle and nod, "yep, uh, kinda."
"Kinda?" He wonders.
"I mean, you're Iron Man or something, right?"
"Or something," he chortles. "You know what, on the second hand," he stops and checks out a silver statue of a naked Grecian goddess, "I think I came for this." He traces along her tits. "Don't make em like they used to, huh?"
He looks at you. No, he looks at your chest. You sputter.
"Bath mats are this way," you turn.
"Ah, come on, don't be like that FinchiePie."
You stop short. Your lashes flick and you gulp. How does he know your user name. You turn to look at him.
He adjusts his tie as he comes closer.
"You know, my middle name is Edward. Anthony Edward Stark."
You stare at him. No, it can't be. That's ridiculous.
"Eddie?" You rasp.
He puts his hands out and smirks, "it's a cute nickname, isn't it?"
"No."
"You left things a little tense. I don't like untied ends so..."
"It's a joke. A prank," you shake your head. "Is this what you do for fun?"
"I'm a funny guy, sweetheart, but I'm not joking right now," he comes closer. "Look, if I tell you the truth, that there was no tall blonde, that I was lying, will you give me a chance?"
You search his face. You're lost. Your disbelief muddles reality.
"This isn't real."
"You ever tried shwarma? It's so damn good."
"No, Eddie-- No, Tony?" Your eyes flit back and forth. "I... I gotta..." you spin and scurry away.
He calls your name. You can't stop. You run down the bath aisle and into the employee restroom. You twist the lock and stare at your baffled reflection.
"What the fuck?" You ask the person in the mirror.
#tony stark#dark tony stark#dark!tony stark#tony stark x reader#series#fic#dark fic#dark!fic#stark contrast#avengers#iron man#mcu#marvel
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THE LAST OF US. CHALLENGERS.








a/n: GUYSSSS!!!! i have been thinking about this for so long and finally had the lovely encouragement of my dear mutuals. thank you so much @blastzachilles @jesuistrestriste @222col @cherrygirlfriend @tashism @voidsuites @diyasgarden @cha11engers ily ily
—
the sun was kind that morning.
warm, radiant.
it spilled across the cracked pavement outside their house, catching on the droplets of water art sprayed in long indents across the driveway. the hose hissed in his hand, steady, controlled. he liked mornings. they were simple.
art had only just retired.
a quiet press release. a photo of him holding up a racket, smiling that slanted grin. no tour, no speeches, no farewell match. he didn’t want that. he didn’t want to become someone people said goodbye to.
he didn’t miss the game. not exactly. he missed the rhythm.
the way everything had a place—routine.
out here, everything was softer, unscored.
but he had tashi. he had patrick. he had mornings like this one—sunlight filtering through the bushes, cicadas buzzing like an old television left static in the next room.
across the street, someone was mowing their lawn. two blocks over, a child’s laughter rang out and broke open the stillness. somewhere, a dog barked.
and inside, tashi was asleep on patrick’s chest.
they’d fallen like that after breakfast, curled on the sunken couch, limbs tangled. the tv hummed low in front of them—an old tennis match, just background noise. tashi’s hair was damp from the shower, her cheek pressed against patrick’s heartbeat. his arm was slung around her waist, fingers trailing along the curve of her spine.
he wasn’t watching the match. he was watching her. eyes half-lidded, breath soft, like the whole world had finally gone quiet just for them.
they were happy. art was happy.
lily was upstate with tashi’s mother—one weekend, that was the plan. time to breathe. time to let the dust settle after everything. after the match, after the headlines, after the choice.
they had chosen each other.
the three of them in this too-small house with mismatched mugs and an overgrown backyard and a fridge full of groceries they bought together. patrick had moved in two weeks ago. no more hotels. no more rivalry, or radio silence. he woke up to their voices now. he knew where they kept the sugar. he belonged. they all did.
art shut the hose off. the driveway gleamed. the sun was higher now, warm on his shoulders. he looked up, squinting. there was a sound—a low thump, dull and heavy, like a car backfiring—but then it came again. and again. louder. closer.
his first thought wasn’t danger.
until he heard the screaming.
tashi sat up like a knife. patrick’s hand went to her shoulder.
“what was that?” she asked. the words sounded foreign in her mouth. too sharp.
art was standing in the yard, frozen. water pooled at his feet. across the street, a man ran past, shirt torn, blood streaked down his jaw. not stumbling. sprinting. there was a woman behind him, bare feet pounding the pavement, mouth open, shrieking. she didn’t stop—art didn’t move. he just watched as she caught the man and brought him down like a wave crashing on rock.
he took a step back.
the second that woman hit the man, the second he saw the blood and the way her body moved—like her bones didn’t fit right—he dropped the hose and ran.
his feet slapped wet against the concrete, heart punching against his ribs.
the front door swung open under his hands and he was shouting before he even saw them.
“tashi? patrick?”
tashi stood in the living room, already upright, eyes locked on the window.
patrick was behind her, halfway to the door.
“i heard screaming,” art said, breath sharp. “someone’s—someone’s attacking people outside. i think—i don’t know. i think something’s happening.”
inside, patrick was locking the front door. “don’t panic,” he said, voice flat, like he was convincing himself. “we’re okay. it’s probably—just some freak accident. someone on drugs.”
“that wasn’t normal,” tashi said. she was already in motion. shoes on. bag in hand. “that was wrong.”
they tried calling lily. her grandmother. the neighbour who drove them to the airport that one time. no signal. no answer.
“shit. shit, shit, shit!”
tashi tried her mother again. one ring. two.
then silence.
she stared at the screen, thumb hovering, as if willing the signal back would make it so. patrick stood behind her, pacing. art leaned on the edge of the kitchen sink, watching the window, blinking too fast.
“nothing?” patrick asked.
tashi didn’t answer. didn’t need to.
“we have to go,” art said, voice flat. “we need to get to her. get our girl.”
tashi grabbed the bag they kept by the front door—just in case. extra clothes. passports. protein bars. it had always felt a bit paranoid. now it felt like a lifeline.
they moved fast. not speaking much. they were too damn scared. patrick loaded the car. tashi checked every lock. art lingered on the front steps a second too long, looking at the street. it was quiet now. too quiet. the calm before before the storm.
then they were in the car.
the car rocked forward inch by inch, boxed in by horns and sirens, people screaming out of open windows. art’s hands were tight on the wheel, jaw set. patrick kept glancing out the back, watching the way the skyline smoked.
tashi’s phone sat in her lap like it weighed a hundred pounds.
“try again,” art said. his voice was low. hoarse.
she did.
the line clicked.
and this time—
it rang.
tashi sat up straighter. eyes wide.
patrick leaned in.
one ring.
two.
three.
“—tashi?”
her mother’s voice. sharp with panic. full of motion.
“mama! it’s me—where are you? are you okay?”
static. the sound of something crashing. voices yelling in the background.
“i’m—i can’t—i don’t know what’s happening—your father went out and—lily’s here, she’s here, but—”
“let me talk to her,” tashi piped up, already crying.
then— a shift in the sound. the phone jostling.
a smaller voice, high and soft, piped through the speaker
“mama?”
tashi covered her mouth with her hand. patrick closed his eyes in relief. art swallowed hard, staring at the road but not seeing it.
“oh, baby,” tashi breathed. “baby, we’re coming, okay? stay with grandma, we’re coming, we’re—”
“i drew you something,” lily spoke up innocently. “for when you get here. i put sparkles on it.”
tashi choked out a laugh, like a sob wearing a mask.
“i love you so much,” she said. “so much, lily. we’re gonna be there soon.”
“okay,” lily said. her voice a whisper now. “i miss you.”
art bit his lip so hard it split.
then—
a crash. a scream.
the sound of the phone dropping.
then static.
nothing but static.
unbeknownst to them, that would be the last time they’d hear their sweet baby’s voice.
tashi called again and again. no answer. just the same broken noise.
they were certain she was okay. right?
“i’m sure it’s—“
“forget it patrick, let’s just get to her. okay?”
patrick nods at her instruction, complying. he didn’t want to push anyone, not right now. one thing he knew for certain is that tashi and art do not play about their daughter.
the roads were already swollen—people pouring out from side streets, families with bags, kids crying, the sound of sirens somewhere far and constant.
“jesus,” patrick murmured, watching out the window. “people are everywhere.”
“they wouldn’t shut down the city unless it was bad,” art spoke up, eyes on the road.
tashi turned on the radio. static.
then, a voice, shaky and high-speed—
“—advising residents to stay inside. repeat, do not try to leave by vehicle—roads are obstructed, we are getting reports of violent assaults throughout all districts—”
a new voice interrupted. sobbing. a man.
“—my wife—my wife is—oh god, she bit me—she bit me—”
tashi switched it off.
“i’m really fucking worried about lily— and my mom.”
“me too, tash. but we’ll get them, and then figure out what the fuck is happening right now.”
they were moving at a crawl now. cars jammed in every direction. people cutting through lawns. some running. some limping.
and then—a crash. two cars up ahead. a van plowed through a sedan. the sound of metal folding in on itself.
“fuck!” art cursed loudly.
patrick flinched. tashi’s hand shot out to brace herself against the dash.
“go around,” she said.
“there’s no room,” art muttered, checking the mirrors.
then they saw it.
a figure in the street—multiple. one of them dragged a man from the wreckage, mouth already at his throat, teeth gnashing.
patrick’s voice cracked. “oh fuck.”
art threw the car into reverse, tires squealing, people yelling behind them.
more infected spilled out from a side alley—fast, twitching, wild.
“where do we go?” tashi snapped.
“i don’t know!” art yelled, sweat pouring down his back. “everyone— get out.”
they flung the doors open and spilled into the street.
heat slammed into them, thick and humid and laced with smoke. the air was full of noise—sirens, screams, the distant thud of helicopters, the grind of metal against metal. people were everywhere, running in every direction, some bleeding, some dragging others, some not looking human at all.
patrick grabbed tashi’s hand. art pushed forward, arm out, clearing space. they didn’t know where they were going—only away.
they barely made it ten feet before the first one turned the corner.
a man—what used to be a man—sprinting full force, mouth wide open, skin pale and torn around the cheeks, eyes blown wide and milky. his jaw hung crooked, like it had been unhinged on impact. something in his throat made a sound like boiling.
he tackled another man to the pavement, biting deep into his neck. there was no hesitation. no reason. only hunger.
tashi stopped moving. just for a second.
then art grabbed her arm. “don’t look. go!”
they kept running.
another infected lunged from between two cars. a woman this time, barefoot and twitching. one foot bent the wrong way, bones visible through a tear in her ankle. her fingers were blackened at the tips, like frostbite.
she reached for tashi—howling.
tashi dodged, barely. stumbled.
then something else tackled her.
a man, snarling, breath wet and wrong. he slammed her into the pavement, teeth gnashing near her face. his eyes were leaking. his gums were peeling back from raw, red teeth. the stench of rot and blood hit her like a punch.
she screamed.
patrick was there in seconds. he threw himself at the attacker, ripped him off her with a guttural sound—half fury, half fear. they hit the ground hard. patrick didn’t stop. his fists connected again and again with the man’s skull until the thing stopped moving.
his knuckles came away slick with blood.
“you ok?” he gasped, pulling tashi to her feet. “run.”
she nodded, dazed, scraped. didn’t even feel the blood on her temple.
art was ahead, fending off another one—this one slower, limping, foaming at the mouth. it reached for him and art swung the crowbar he’d picked up from somewhere.
a wet crack. the body dropped. art was breathing like a runner past the finish line, adrenaline buzzing like static in his ears.
“stay behind me,” he said, voice low, steady.
he didn’t look scared. but his hands were shaking.
they ran again.
a fire burst out of a building just ahead. a man jumped from a window, landed wrong. a woman screamed. a police car smashed into a mailbox and flipped, wheels still spinning.
tashi turned to look at patrick.
his eyes were glassy. blood smeared his shirt. not his.
“you okay?” she asked.
“no. not even fucking close.” he said. “but i’m not dead. you’re not dead.”
“yet,” art muttered. “so, let’s keep it that way.”
they didn’t stop running.
not even when the ground shook. not even when another wave of infected screamed in the distance, closing in.
because stopping meant death.
—
time didn’t pass the same anymore. it didn’t tick or chime or unfold. it just dragged. like a torn bag behind a car.
they’d found a place.
not safe, not really. but empty. forgotten.
a rusting factory on the edge of some highway, windows shattered long before the world had ended. the walls were lined with old machines—hulking, silent things covered in dust and vines.
the air smelled like oil and iron and wet concrete. patrick had made a joke about “living like kings.” no one laughed.
they slept in a corner behind stacked crates, wrapped in coats they didn’t own. someone else’s blankets. someone else’s shoes. everything was borrowed now. nothing belonged.
patrick sat with his back against the wall, eyes fixed on a single crack running down the ceiling. he didn’t speak much. the quiet spoke more.
tashi curled beside him, knees drawn up, face pressed into the sleeve of her jacket.
art stood by the window, the one with the least glass, staring out at the dead lot below. he was thinner. paler. his hands stayed clenched even when he was asleep.
every noise outside made his head snap up.
art looked down at his wrist where a friendship bracelet sat tied there. a tiny thing—pink and green thread, uneven knots, a plastic bead shaped like a heart sitting crooked in the middle. lily had made it the day before she left for her grandma’s, tongue between her teeth, little fingers working hard.
“so you don’t forget me,” she’d said, climbing into his lap. “just in case.”
he laughed. kissed her forehead. “i couldn’t forget you if i tried.”
“you could,” she said, dead serious. “if you hit your head or something. so just wear it ‘til i come back.”
he promised he would.
and he kept that promise—through the screams, the fire, the flight, the blood. it stayed on his wrist, just above the cracked face of the watch he never used anymore.
sometimes at night, he pressed it to his lips. he didn’t even know he was doing it.
patrick noticed, but didn’t say anything.
tashi saw it once when he was washing his hands in an old sink, the water brown and stinking. she stared at it like it might speak.
they hadn’t said her name out loud in days. it hurt too much. their darling, darling girl.
but the bracelet said it for them.
every frayed thread. every faded knot. every bead still warm from his skin. it was a reminder of all she was, everything perfect in the world.
lily was only seven.
freshly seven. her birthday had been three weeks before the outbreak. she had a cake with strawberries on it. she asked for socks that matched and a toy sloth. tashi made her pancakes shaped like hearts, that art playfully stole a bite of. he could, he was retired. he read her to sleep that night—his voice soft and loving.
none of them said it out loud, but they knew.
they knew what a child looked like alone in this world.
they knew the odds.
still, sometimes, tashi whispered into the dark,
“maybe they got out. maybe they’re somewhere safe.”
and patrick would nod, because what else could he do?
art wiuld sit with his jaw tight, fists curled, breathing too slow.
“yeah. maybe they got out.”
outside, the wind whistled through broken beams.
inside, the silence was heavy with heartbreak.
they didn’t talk about tennis. or who they used to be. what they used to have— and what more they could have had.
that version of them died in the car, on that street, under that sky.
#Spotify#challengers#art donaldson#fanfic#challengers au#the last of us#the last of us au#challengers x the last of us#patrick zweig#tashi duncan#mike faist#josh o'connor#zendaya#challengers fanfic#partashi#the last of us fanfic#tlou#coolgrl111
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the starlit streets of gotham



# pairing: yandere batfam x magical girl reader
# synopsis: after meeting a strange cat you suddenly gain magical powers. now gotham has a new hero.
# warnings: this will contain dark themes such as obsession and possessiveness. if you are uncomfortable, please block me. viewer discretion is advised. minors DNI.
# notes: reblogs, comments, and likes are appreciated!
the rain came down hard, soaking the city in cold filth. it pooled in potholes, ran in oily rivers down the streets, and dripped from rusted fire escapes like the city itself was bleeding out. somewhere below, a scream cut through the night—sharp, desperate.
from the rooftop, a figure watched. a pink ruffle fluttered in the wind, its lining stitched with constellations that shimmered when the light hit just right. a silver staff rested in gloved hands, pulsing faintly, sensing the wrongness in the air.
magic wasn’t supposed to exist in Gotham. the city belonged to shadows and fists, to monsters that grinned too wide and men who broke their own bones to prove a point. but you had awakened anyway, flooding the senses with truths no one else could see—sickness festering beneath the pavement, the way darkness slithered between the cracks.
and tonight, that darkness had its hands around a woman’s throat.
in the alley below, three figures in clown masks had backed their prey against a brick wall. one had a knife. Another was laughing, a shrill, jittery sound that bounced between the buildings. the third just stood there, waiting, the way a wolf waits when it knows the fight is already over.
a breath. a shift in weight.
the silver staff raised, and a single whispered command slipped into the night. “moonlight bind”
the air crackled. silver chains of light erupted from nothing, coiling around the three like glowing roots. the laughter died. the knife clattered to the pavement. one of them tried to run, but the bindings yanked tight, pinning all three in place.
up on a distant rooftop, hidden behind the curtain of rain, nightwing watched.
his white eyes followed the way the figure landed lightly in the alley, boots touching down in the spreading neon puddles. the way they tilted their head, inspecting your work—not cruel, not hesitant. just making sure it held.
magic.
gotham had never been kind to the supernatural. It had its monsters, sure, but they bled when you hit them hard enough. magic was something else. something unpredictable. something dangerous.
And yet, here it was.
dick’s jaw slightly dropped in awe. he watched as the figure twirled the staff again, then leapt—up, out, into the storm—leaving only the dying glow of silver chains in the alley below.
for a long moment, he stood there, listening to the rain, watching the place where the light had been. his mind drifting your pink frilly outfit and one thought could only pop in his mind, “so cute.”
then he turned and disappeared into the night.
it was raining again.
not the dramatic kind of gotham rain that lashed against windows and turned the city into a blur of neon and shadow—just a slow, miserable drizzle that seeped into your bones and made everything smell like wet pavement.
you sat at your desk, tapping your pen against your notebook, only half-listening as the teacher droned on about something historical and probably tragic. the words blurred together. the clock above the whiteboard ticked too loud.
next to you, tim drake nudged my arm with his elbow.
“you look like you’re about to drop dead at any moment,” he whispered.
you sighed. “i wish.”
tim chuckled under his breath. “long night?”
he said it like he was joking, but with tim, you could never be sure. he had this way of looking at people—really looking, like he was piecing together a puzzle you didn’t even know you were part of.
“just tired,” you said. not a lie. not the whole truth, either.
tim nodded like he understood anyway. his foot tapped against the floor—he was always moving, always thinking. his notes were perfect—bullet points, underlined dates, little side comments in the margins. yours were a half-finished doodle of a cat and a blank space where information should have been.
“you take notes like you’re writing a novel,” I muttered, eyeing the neat bullet points.
tim smirked, twirling his pen between his fingers. “some of us actually want to pass.”
you scoffed. “i do want to pass. I just think history should be more… optional.”
tim huffed a quiet laugh, shaking his head. “yeah, that sounds like something you’d say.” He hesitated for half a second, then glanced at me out of the corner of his eye. “i could help you study, y’know.”
you blinked.
for a moment, he looked like he wanted to take it back—ducking his head slightly, rubbing the back of his neck. his ears had gone a little pink.
you ignored the way my stomach twisted at that.
the teacher said something about an upcoming project. tim scribbled something down, and you let your gaze drift toward the window. the city stretched out past the glass, rain-slicked and endless, a dull orange glow swallowed by low-hanging clouds.
something felt off.
you didn’t know how to explain it.
like the air was heavier. like something in the city had shifted, just slightly, just enough that you could feel it in my teeth.
you shook the thought away and turned back toward tim. he was still writing, lost in whatever thought had taken hold of him.
you opened your mouth—maybe to ask if he felt it too, maybe just to say something stupid—but the bell rang before you could.
tim sighed, stuffing his notes into his bag. “you heading straight home?”
you hesitated. you should have said yes. should have made up an excuse. instead, you shifted in your seat.
“…dunno.”
tim’s gaze lingered, eyes deep and searching, like in this moment, i was the only thing in his world. his expression softened, the usual sharp focus melting into something quieter, something warmer.
then, barely above a whisper, like he wasn’t sure he wanted me to hear it—
“be careful, okay?”
the feeling in your stomach returned, but you forced a grin. “what, worried about me?”
he rolled his eyes but didn’t quite meet mine. “just—text me later, alright?”
“yeah, yeah.” you waved him off, grabbing my bag. “see you tomorrow, Drake.”
he huffed a laugh. “see you.”
you left before he could say anything else.
tim’s words stuck with you longer than they should have.
even as you left the school, even as you walked through the rain-slicked streets, you kept hearing them—soft, careful, like he was saying more than just be careful. like he knew something I didn’t.
you shook the thought away. gotham makes people paranoid. it gets under your skin, curls around your ribs, makes you see things in shadows that aren’t there. you weren't about to let it get to you.
but the feeling lingered.
the weight in the air, the way the city felt different, like something was shifting just beneath the surface. the streetlights buzzed too loud. the shadows stretched just a little too far. the drizzle had turned into a thin mist, blurring the edges of buildings, turning the world into something unreal.
you turned down the alley behind your apartment, pulling your hood up, ready to shake off the weirdness of the day—
and then you saw the cat.
small. black as the alley it sat in. watching you.
completely dry.
you stopped.
the feeling in your ribs tightened.
you should have ignored it. you really should have.
but the cat blinked—silver eyes, too bright in the dark, too big for its face—and suddenly, you couldn’t move.
you couldn’t look away.
and then—
it spoke.
not out loud, not like a cartoon. the voice was in my head, curling around your thoughts like smoke. "you can hear me."
you took a step back. the cat followed. its eyes were silver, too bright in the dark, too big for its face.
you wanted to run. every instinct in you screamed to leave, to pretend this never happened. but something in your chest burned, something you didn’t recognize, and your feet stayed planted where they were.
the cat took another step forward. the shadows stretched with it, bending wrong, twisting around its paws like they wanted to pull it back.
"gotham is sick," the cat said, and you felt the words more than heard them. "and you can fix it."
what the actual fuck—
you opened your mouth, but no sound came out.
the cat’s eyes widened, and suddenly your head was full of light. your vision blurred—flashes of the city, of darkness curling under its skin, of something old and rotten stirring beneath its streets. your chest tightened. your heart pounded too fast, too loud. the cat came closer, its fur brushing your leg, and the second it touched you—
everything exploded.
not fire. not heat. light.
silver, cold, endless. it rushed through you, into you, twisting itself around your bones, threading itself through your veins. your skin burned, but you didn’t scream. your head was full of knowing—of power, of purpose, of the city whispering secrets you had never wanted to hear.
you dropped to your knees in the alley, gasping, hands shaking.
the cat sat in front of me, tail curled neatly around its paws, watching.
"What… what did you do to me?"
the cat blinked. the rain didn’t touch it. "i gave you a choice."
you didn’t remember choosing.
but when you looked down at your hands, they weren’t empty anymore. a silver staff lay across your palms, glowing faintly in the dark. The rain turned to steam when it touched me. your breath came out in clouds.
and somehow, you knew—if you reached out, if you let it, you could pull the light into your hands and turn it into something real.
you could fight.
the cat stood, stretching lazily. "fix it," it said again, voice curling into the back of your skull. "or let it rot. the power is yours now."
then it turned and walked into the dark, swallowed by the city before you could ask anything else.
you sat there, rain pooling around me, heart still hammering.
the light inside me hadn’t faded.
and somehow, you knew it never would.
#yandere batfam#yandere x you#male yandere#yandere x reader#platonic yandere#yandere x darling#yandere#yandere dc#yandere dick grayson#yandere bruce wayne#yandere damian wayne#yandere tim drake#yandere jason todd#magical girl reader#yandere batman#yandere scenarios#yandere headcanons#yandere batboys
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Satoru Gojo ✭ Kiss Me Back

wc: basically 5k… it wasn’t meant to be lmao
summary: based off of this thought i posted a while ago
genre: angst, fluff, drunk “confession” but it gets misunderstood, friends to lovers, silly drunk Gojo
warnings: n/a
tori’s note: I finished this fic after having it in my drafts for almost a year. I kinda strayed from how my original prompt went lol. Idk how I feel about the second half of this, I’m not a huge fan of it but y’know, it be what it be. Hope you enjoy it nonetheless!

Gojo doesn’t drink often. In fact, it’s more accurate to say he never drinks. He hates alcohol. The way it tastes, the way it burns, and especially how quickly it affects his system.
He’s always been a lightweight, it only taking a few shots before he was intoxicated. But for some reason, Shoko’s teasing pressure to get him to drink got to him a lot more tonight than usual.
It was supposed to be only one shot, then just one more. But now, here he is, a couple hours later and 6 shots down, drunk and stumbling, leaning against you for support.
You grunt as you struggle to keep the tall man vertical and walk him down the street to your car.
“You are amazing, Y/n,” Gojo slurs, wrapping his arm tighter around your neck. You huff and roll your eyes.
“Yeah, yeah, you’ve said that 3 times already,” you laugh lightly. Gojo trips over his own foot, causing you to stumble and almost fall. Thankfully, you catch yourself and keep the two of you from crashing into the concrete.
“Jeez, Toru! Are you serious?” You ask, unbelieving that he was so intoxicated that he really couldn’t walk straight. Gojo only moans miserably in response. “We’re almost there,” you sigh.
You knew how much he hated the repercussions of drinking and tried to stop him before it was too late. But he seemed to be feeling a little self-destructive tonight, so your warnings fell on deaf ears, much to your annoyance. Even so, you still felt empathetic enough to take him home yourself, turning down Nanami’s kind offer to do so.
After another block of walking and stumbling, you finally make it to your car, opening the passenger side and awkwardly shuffling around as you try to help Gojo into the seat. It felt like he was purposefully doing everything he could to make this simple task as complicated as possible. Which, honestly, you wouldn’t put past him.
You eventually get him and his lanky limbs into the vehicle and hold back a laugh when he groans and dramatically drapes himself over your center console, arms spilling into the driver’s seat. You walk around to the other side of the car, moving his arms carefully before sitting down and pushing him to lean against the window.
“Okay, tough guy. You still have the water Nanami gave you?” You ask. Gojo clumsily reaches into his pants pocket and pulls out the water bottle he somehow managed to fit in there. Damn men’s pocket sizes.
“Good, I want it empty by the time I make it to your place,” you state, turning on the car and pulling into the street.
“The whole thing?” Gojo whines. You laugh breathily, finding amusement in his drunk demeanor.
“Yes, the whole thing. Gotta stay hydrated so drink up!” You encourage.
The white-haired man mutters a complaint as he cracks open the bottle, and you watch dumbfounded as he drains it in seconds.
“I didn’t mean drink it all at once…” you say. Gojo shrugs and sinks further into his seat.
You drive in silence for a few minutes, the pale, orange street lights whizzing by and the soft, white noise of the tires rolling on the pavement making the ride a peaceful, comforting experience. At least it would be if Gojo wasn’t staring holes into the side of your face.
In his drunkenness, he’d somehow managed to misplace his glasses and blindfold, much to your dismay. You adore those brilliant blue eyes, but damn, if they weren’t intimidating as hell when they were staring you down. You do your best to ignore it, keeping your eyes focused on the road ahead of you.
You feel your heart skip a beat when a cold, calloused finger presses gently against your temple before tracing your hairline, sweeping your hair behind your ear.
“You’re so pretty,” Gojo whispers, his words barely audible. Your breath catches in your throat, caught off guard by the sudden compliment.
“O-oh, umm… I- th-thank you,” you stutter horribly. Gojo hums softly as though he’s satisfied with your reaction before laughing lightly. His hand leaves your quickly heating face as he turns back to the window, slumping against the cool glass.
After what couldn’t have possibly even been a minute, you hear the faintest snore come from the man. You poke his arm, expecting some kind of reaction. But nope, he’s out.
You take a deep breath and start blasting the AC. It suddenly feels really stuffy in here.
You soon reach his house and pull into the driveway before parking the car and climbing out. You open the passenger door, being careful to not let Gojo dump out onto the ground. You shake his shoulders, whispering to him that he was home and needed to wake up. After some gentle-turned-vigorous shaking, the man wakes up bleary eyed and a bit confused.
“Have a nice nap, sleeping beauty?” You tease, taking his arm and attempting to pull him to his feet. He grunts, reluctantly swinging his feet out of the car and onto the ground. The moment he stands, he leans back against the car, his eyes squeezed shut in discomfort.
“Shhhhit, why did I do that?” He slurs, the alcohol still screwing with his brain. At least he’s more coherent than 30 minutes ago.
“Not to be like that, but I did try to stop you,” you joke.
“Shut up,” he groans. His eyes open and meet with yours, but instead of holding the annoyed glare you were expecting, they were soft, appreciative. His typically pale complexion was still dusted pink, though not nearly as flushed as earlier, and there’s the faintest hint of a smile to accompany it.
He leans against you, his arms snaking around your waist in a loose hug, and his head resting heavily on your shoulder as he sighs. “Thank you, Y/n.”
“Why don’t you thank me when I’ve gotten you inside!” You laugh awkwardly, pushing the large man off of you.
Gojo pouts, his soft, pink lips protruding in a way that could only be described as borderline sensual. You tear your eyes away from him and link your arm in his to walk him into the house with much less stumbling this time.
You make it inside, Gojo dragging down the hall to his room while you dig in his kitchen cabinets in search of ibuprofen. Once you’ve found what you’re looking for, you grab a glass and fill it with water before making your way to Gojo’s room.
You knock on the door, the sound echoing through the cold, empty hallway. A muffled “come in” reaches your ears and you open the door.
You step in and your eyes land on a half-naked Gojo sitting on his bed, stopping you in your tracks. He did say to come in, didn’t he?
He looks at you, a questioning expression written on his face. With everything he’s done this evening, it’s beginning to be hard to believe he’s not purposefully trying to fluster you.
You draw in a breath and walk over to him, refusing to give him the satisfaction of seeing you nervous.
“Here, for the potential hangover,” you say, handing him the pills and water. He takes it gratefully, downing the meds and water quickly. He sets the glass on the nightstand with a soft thunk, and an odd silence follows after.
“Well, I’m gonna head home now. G’night, Toru,” you say, turning on your heels and heading to the door. Your hand barely touches the doorknob when Gojo says your name.
“Y/n,” he calls quietly. You stop and turn to him with a questioning hum, but he doesn’t give any response back other than a waving hand, signaling for you to come back to him. You shuffle awkwardly to stand in front of him, confused about what he wants.
He stands up, his chest almost bumping against yours as he does so. You begin to take a step back, but before you can, his hands are on your waist, holding you in place. You look up at him to ask what he’s doing, but the words get stuck in your throat the moment your eyes meet his.
Those bright, cerulean eyes that were so often hidden from the world, were looking at you with such care and fondness that it made your chest tighten.
Before you’re even aware of what’s happening, his warm, soft lips are pressing tenderly against yours.
Your tense muscles relax and eyes flutter shut as your lips push back against his. His hands grip your waist as he pulls you closer to him before one lifts the back of your shirt, fingers dragging slowly over your skin.
You sigh into him, your own hands traveling up his arms, to his neck, eventually finding home in his silky hair. His other hand moves from your hip to your face, cupping your cheek as he deepens the kiss.
His tongue darts out and sweeps across your lips and the faintest lingering taste of bitter alcohol bites your tastebuds, snapping you back to reality. It’s only then that you remember who you’re kissing, where you are, and how you got there.
Your eyes fly open and hands move to his chest, pushing him away from you harshly. Gojo loses his balance, landing back into a sitting position on his bed, his once peaceful expression now shocked and confused.
Your hand covers your mouth, surprised by your own actions. It’s only a second or two that you stay there, staring at each other before you decide that you should definitely leave.
“I’m sorry, I need to go,” you say, wasting no time in leaving his room and ignoring his calls for you. You jump into your car and start the engine before your door is even closed.
What were you thinking? He’s the drunkest he’s been in ages, how could you let that happen? You curse yourself as you drive home, frustrated that you allowed such a thing when your friend was in such a vulnerable state.
You make it home and park in the driveway, but you don’t leave. You sit in your car and stare blankly at the steering wheel as the full weight of regret begins to sink in.
You’ve desperately wanted that man to kiss you for years now. But not like this! Not when he was intoxicated and most likely not thinking straight. You wanted a genuine kiss; one he gave you because he truly wanted to. Not because his drunk-self just wanted attention.
How are you supposed to keep your feelings for him under wraps after this?
You’ll just have to lie. You’ll tell him that it was just a slip up, that you were caught off guard. That he kissed you and- dammit, you kissed him back! And not only that, you were wrapping your arms around him. You can’t play off your feelings for him when you kissed him like that!
You groan painfully as you open your door and force yourself into your house, trudging your way to your room. You change your clothes and crawl into bed before plugging your phone in. The screen lights up with the red battery, which disappears quickly, revealing a missed call and several texts from Gojo.
I’m sorry Y/n. Can we please talk?
It wasn’t what you think
Y/n?
Hello?
He almost never texts you, let alone several times in a row. But you can’t find it in you to respond. You turn off your phone and stare at your ceiling for what feels like an eternity, the moment replaying in your mind on repeat.
It wasn’t what you think? What is he assuming you think?
You raise a finger to your mouth, remembering how it felt to have his lips on yours as you trace over them.
It was so warm, so sweet. The way he held you close to him, so strong yet gentle. The way his thumb stroked over your face so tenderly. Maybe… it was real.
No. You can’t allow yourself to believe it was genuine and get your hopes up, you can’t.
You roll over onto your side just as your screen lights up once more. You take a glance at it and find another text from Gojo.
I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Please let me explain.
A new wave of anxiety washes over you when you realize you’ll have to see him tomorrow. You do work at the same school after all. You don’t have a few days to process this or even find a way to respond.
You wrap tighter into yourself and painful tears fill your eyes, not taking long before they’re streaming down your face and soaking into your pillow. You just want the earth to open and swallow you.
Your only comfort is in the slim possibility that he was still drunk enough to have a chance of not having clear memories the next day. Maybe he’d wake up, see the messages he’d sent you and not even remember what it was about.
You know it’s a foolish hope. He wasn’t drunk enough during that kiss to have no recollection of it. Even so, it’s the only thought that calms you down enough to fall asleep.
Okay, all you have to do is file a couple reports, meet with Ijichi and Nitta, and check in with Shoko on a new corpse. You don’t even have to be on campus the whole day, just do your few tasks and leave.
You were not going to talk to Gojo today. You’re not sure your heart can handle it right now. You’ve barely even processed what happened last night. It’s like your mind is trying to convince you it was a dream. But the unanswered texts still sitting in your inbox say otherwise.
You decided you would do your best to avoid the inevitable conversation. You’re sure that when he sees you, he’ll likely confront you about it. But, if you were with others, you knew he’d keep his mouth shut. You can’t hide from him, but you make damn sure he can’t catch you alone.
You know you’ll have to talk about it eventually, just not today. And maybe not tomorrow. Or the day after that.
You take a deep breath as you walk into the school and head for Yaga’s office. You’re not too worried about bumping into Gojo here as he usually avoids this part of the school simply because he’s afraid of running into Yaga and being asked to do something he doesn’t want to.
You make it there without incident and knock on Yaga’s door before entering. Thankfully, your meeting doesn’t last long as you just have to turn in your reports and give him a quick rundown of your past week’s assignments.
Next was finding Ijichi and Nitta. Which meant going to the more common areas of the school. Which meant risking running into Gojo.
At this point, you were just hoping he decided to go MIA today as he typically did. Or maybe he’d be too hung over to even bother getting out of bed. Whatever the case may be, you just hoped he wouldn’t be behind the door to which you are about to enter.
You turn the doorknob quietly and poke your head in, finding no one but Ijichi sitting at a desk looking over a stack of papers, and you feel relieved. You step inside and Ijichi looks up, a small smile appearing once he sees it’s you.
“Ahh, Y/n. You’re a bit early,” he greets kindly.
“Haha, yeah. My meeting with Yaga didn’t take as long as expected,” you laugh softly as you walk over to the desk and take a seat across from the man. “Where’s Nitta?”
“She’s currently out with the first years. They were sent to investigate the disturbance you reported a few days ago. Turns out it was just a few Grade 3 curses roaming around.” Ijichi replies.
He shuffles the papers spread out on the desk into a few separate piles before picking up each one, shaking them into neat stacks and paper clipping them together.
“Oh, that’s good to know,” you say with a smile. “So, you said you and Nitta needed something?”
“Oh, yes. We wanted your opinion on-”
“Gooood morning!” A familiar voice calls happily as the door swings open. You hunch over in your chair and glue your eyes to the papers in front of you, not daring to look at the man. You didn’t think you would run into him this soon.
“Oh, goodmorning, Gojo,” Ijichi says.
“Ijichi,” Gojo greets and nods to his co-worker.
He turns to you, your eyes still studying the reports laying in front of you. It was obvious you weren’t reading them though, considering they were upside down to you. “Y/n,” he says quietly.
You still refuse to look at him, mumbling a barely audible “good morning” in return.
Ijichi, sensing some tension, clears his throat and returns to the matter that brought you here in the first place. He only had a few questions, wanting your opinion on which recent cases should be assigned to which students. It wasn’t long before you had fulfilled your need and could leave.
You say your goodbyes, stand from the desk and make your way to the door, still having not spared Gojo, who was leaning against one of the couches, even a glance.
Despite hiding his eyes behind that dark blindfold of his, you could tell he’d been staring at you the whole time. You could practically feel his gaze burning holes into your skin. But, just as you expected, he didn’t dare bring up anything about the previous night with Ijichi in the room.
You walk out the door, thankfully leaving Gojo behind it. But you weren’t sure how long he’d stay there. You make your way quickly through the halls as you head towards the morgue. You open the door and step inside, the cold air making your body shake with a chill.
You walk through, but find no sign of Shoko. Deciding that she must be in the office, you turn and start making your way over, it being just a couple doors down the hall.
You step outside of the morgue and about jump out of your skin when you’re met with blinding white hair. Gojo. Of course. You should’ve known he would catch up to you.
You stand there for a moment, him standing in the doorway and therefore blocking your exit. You still can’t bring yourself to look at him, not really, only giving him quick glances. It must be so easy for him to make “eye contact” when he doesn’t really have to.
“Can we talk?” He says, his voice taking on an unusually shaky and serious tone, and you suppress a sigh. Any hope you had of him not remembering last night shattered with those three words.
“There’s nothing to talk about,” you say quietly, desperately wanting to avoid the impending conversation.
“Y/n,” he says, his large hand reaching carefully for your arm. You move quickly, avoiding his grasp.
“I don’t want to talk,” you say and push past him, making it through the doorway. You speed walk down the hallway to the morgue office, thankful that it’s just a few doors down. Gojo begins to say something but before he can, you’re knocking on the door, shutting him up quickly.
Shoko opens the door only a moment after you’ve knocked, silently stepping aside to let you in once she sees it’s you. Her neutral expression breaks a bit when she sees who’s behind you.
“Gojo, wasn’t expecting to see you today,” she says, referring to the rough condition he was in last night.
“I’m full of surprises, aren’t I?” He chuckles. He looks at you as he says this and you feel your face grow warm. Shoko walks over to her desk and shuffles through the various items in search of something.
“How are you feeling? You haven’t had that many drinks in a long time,” She asks curiously.
“I feel great actually. Y/n is a pretty good caretaker,” he says, once again looking over at you. “She’s the reason I’m not hungover.”
Yep, you certainly were. Maybe you should’ve skipped the water and ibuprofen. But that was before what happened. Past you had no idea that future you would be cursing that decision.
“He wasn’t too much trouble was he? Gojo’s always annoying when he’s drunk.” Like he’s not annoying when he isn’t drunk.
“He was fine,” you say plainly, wanting to move on from the topic.
“Fine is one way to put it,” Gojo says, an obnoxiously flirty smirk on his face. What happened to the serious and borderline nervous Gojo you had just a moment ago? Bring him back please.
“Maybe I should’ve let Nanami take you when he’d offered,” you mutter. Shoko turns back around to you, confused by the comments being made.
“Is that really what you would’ve wanted?” Gojo asks.
“If it means we wouldn’t be having this conversation right now, then yes.”
Shoko looks between the two of you, reading the looks on your faces and expertly deciphering that this was not a conversation she needed (or wanted) to be a part of.
“I’m not getting involved in this,” Shoko mutters as she collects her things and quickly leaves the room, abandoning you in this anxiety-inducing situation. “We can meet later, Y/n.”
“Ah! Wait, Shoko!” You call, but she ignores you and walks out the door. Well, this certainly isn’t what you wanted to happen. Now you had no excuse to leave and apparently didn’t have anyone to have your back. You knew Shoko saw your plea for help in your eyes and she actively ignored it. But, it is Shoko. She always avoids getting involved in things that don’t concern her.
The silence that follows Shoko’s leaving is so incredibly deafening and you hope the ground will open up beneath you. You debate leaving, but you know that Gojo will just follow you. There was no escaping it now. Dammit, and you were so close to getting out without speaking to him.
You cross your arms over your chest and lean against the desk, your eyes glued to the floor.
“Y/n,” Gojo speaks softly. You refuse to look at him. You can’t. You don’t know what will happen if you do. “Y/n.” He steps closer to you and you sink further into yourself, feeling your throat tighten. “Let me explai-”
“What did you mean?” You close your eyes, finding yourself talking before you can even comprehend the words leaving your mouth.
“What?” Gojo says, confused. You sigh, annoyed with yourself now for having said anything.
“Your text. You said it wasn’t what I thought it was. What did you mean?” Gojo looks at you. Well, you assume he’s looking at you. He could be looking at the wall behind you for all you knew.
“I…” Gojo starts but doesn’t finish. He sighs quietly and leans against the chair in front of you. He doesn’t attempt to speak again for a long moment and you begin to wonder if he even plans to. And you’re right, he doesn’t speak. But instead, his hand reaches for the dark blindfold hiding his eyes, and he pulls it down around his neck, his snow white hair falling into his face.
You tear your eyes away as soon as he does, not able to bear even the thought of looking at him directly in those blue irises. Luckily, you’re not tempted to as he keeps his head down, his hair shielding his eyes from your view.
“I remember everything from last night,” the man says finally. You feel your heart sink. You knew he remembered, but for some reason, hearing him say so only made your anxiety worsen. “You didn’t give me a chance to say goodbye last night,” he says with a mild, teasing tone, though it was made with minimal effort, the tension in the room making it hard to joke playfully.
Your arms tighten around you and your throat burns, your eyes remaining focused on everything but him.
“Yeah, well, I didn’t expect to be leaving in such a hurry either,” you say, risking your voice breaking into tears. Gojo chuckles.
“I thought you’d stay for a bit longer after the way you were kissing me,” He jokes, and this time it has his usual lightheartedness to it. Despite that, you feel your blood run hot through your body and for a moment you forget that you’re avoiding looking at him. Your eyes whip over to see him already looking at you, a smirk on his lips.
“Wha- you kissed me!” You whisper yell, afraid that someone outside may hear you. You can’t believe him. HE made a move on YOU, and yet he wants to talk about the way you were kissing HIM?
“Buuut, you kissed me back!” He says accusingly but airily. You close your mouth at this. He’s right, you did. And this is just what you were afraid of, him realizing that you kissing him back meant you actually enjoyed it if only a little. You couldn’t hide it.
“And I shouldn’t have, I’m sorry,” you say quietly. You turn your gaze away just in time to miss the way Gojo’s face twitches and his smile drops. Before you can’t stop yourself, you continue to speak, the coil in your throat snapping and the tears beginning to well in your eyes.
“I shouldn’t have kissed you back. I shouldn’t have let you kiss me to begin with. But please, I don’t want to hear what you have to say about it. I know you were drunk and it was a mistake just… Please, don’t tell me that.”
The silence that follows your statement is so quiet that you can hear Gojo’s uneven breaths alongside your own. You feel the urge to run, to walk out the doors and never turn back. To find a hole somewhere to bury yourself in, never to resurface.
“You think I made a mistake?” Gojo’s words barely reach your ears, his voice so soft you almost have to strain to hear it. He looks at you, completely dejected. “Even if I did feel that way, do you think I’d come here to mock you for it? Do you think I’d be that cruel?” The hurt in his voice is so obvious that you can feel it yourself.
“I… I don’t know.” Truthfully, you did know. You knew he wouldn’t do something like that. He may be annoying, but he’s not cruel. It was out of your own fear of the outcome that you were avoiding this conversation. But then, two words in his statement stand out to you.
Even if.
Meaning even if it was a mistake. Meaning he didn’t think it was?
The tears welling in your eyes begin to fall when you dare to look up at him, his own already on you. But you don’t look away this time.
“Would you have kissed me if you were sober?” You ask quietly. Gojo’s shoulders slump and his face grows longer at your words. He takes a cautious step towards you, testing to see if you’ll back away. And you don’t.
“Y/n, I didn’t kiss you because I was drunk,” he replies, his voice smooth as silk. He takes another step forward, this time reaching out a hand to place on your arm, and you don’t pull away.
“That’s what I meant when I said it wasn’t what you thought. I knew you figured it was an alcohol-influenced choice. And while the alcohol admittedly may have had something to do with it, that wasn’t why I did it.” Your vision blurs as you begin to cry, your tears feeling like rivers of fire as they flow down your cheeks.
“I did it because I wanted to, Y/n,” he admits. He lifts a hand to your face, wiping your tears as he strokes your cheek with his knuckles. “It wasn’t a mistake. It was a choice. And one I don’t regret.”
You close your eyes, not being able to see with them open anyway. His other hand moves from your arm to swipe at your tears, both hands now cupping your face tenderly.
“I don’t know what to say,” you mumble. You raise your hands to wrap your fingers around his wrists, your thumbs stroking over the back of his hands. You open your eyes, your vision clear enough to see him looking at you fondly, a genuine smile tugging at the corners of his lips. His soft lips that, in the back of your mind, you’ve been thinking about all morning.
Your gaze must have lingered on his mouth for a moment too long as his smile widens. He comes closer to you, his head towering over yours and his hands guide your face to continue looking at him.
“You don’t have to say anything right now. But.” He leans his face to yours, his warm breath against your lips. “I would like to kiss you again. And I hope you won’t run away this time.” His voice lilts in that familiar, teasing tone and your heart twists.
“I won’t,” you say with a breathless laugh.
His large hands continue to hold your head as he moves forward, wasting no time in putting his lips against yours in a passionate but tender kiss.
And this time, you let yourself kiss him back.

©Cxtori 2024 please do not copy, plagiarize, repost or translate. reblogs appreciated
#☆彡tori writes#꥟hey queuetie#i’m back bbs#gojo x reader#satoru gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#gojo#satoru gojo#gojo satoru#jjk#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#gojo angst#gojo x you#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen x you#gojo fluff
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Too Good To Be True | Lucien x Reader


...you're just too good to be true...can't take my eyes off of you...
summary: in which your newest muse catches you red handed.
word count: 1,600
a/n: I do struggle writing Lucien but I had seen this tiktok and wanted to write a meet-cute over it and when I saw this fanart above made by IG user kri_stasss_, I took this as a sign lol. I also listened to the song can't take my eyes off of you like 100x while writing this.
With a sigh, you lean back into your seat, allowing your eyes a break. You had been sitting at the corner of the bustling cafe for over an hour, choosing to surround yourself with Velaris’s warmth and the smell of coffee in the hopes to finally draw something. But your sketchbook is spread open on the table with a half-finished drawing.
You look at the view before you, the Sidra River shimmering like pure sapphire under the sun’s gaze. The leaves of surrounding trees rustling gently in the soft spring breeze and flowers vibrant hues adorn the riverwalk. It’s a beautiful sight–one that many stop and admire. Yet, it is not enough to fuel the inspiration you so desperately need.
The flowing water and distant laughter of children blend into a soothing symphony as you absentmindedly twirl your pencil between your fingers, thoughts drifting. Send me a muse, you plead to the Cauldron, yearning to feel that thrill again.That spark that ignites your passion of drawing. The very one that moves your hand effortlessly across the paper.
The sound of iron against pavement startles you, pulling you from your thoughts. You blink your eyes back into focus and instinctively, they land on the source of the noise. The table diagonal from you, that had been vacant for the past hour, now has an occupant. An occupant who is blocking your view of the Sidra River, the very one that is half drawn across your sketchbook.
But you can’t bring yourself to complain.
Not when there is a man of striking beauty seated there.
His mere presence commands your attention, his red hair catching the sunlight and gleaming like fire. You feel your breath catch in your throat as your eyes trace the elegant lines of his face. Brutal scars mar the left side of his face–from his brow all the way down to his jaw.
Despite this, the male is devastatingly handsome. Ethereal.
Too good to be true, you think, finding yourself captivated by his eyes. His right eye, whole and russet-colored, holds a depth that draws you in. But his left eye…His left eye is a mechanical marvel, golden and intricate, and gleaming with an otherworldly light.
And suddenly, you’re overwhelmed with an urge to touch him. To reassure yourself that he is real and not just a figment of your imagination. Gods, with a face and built body like his, he’d be heaven to touch…
A rush of excitement floods your veins and you feel a familiar thrill coursing through you. Your hands are turning the pages of your sketchbook until a blank page sits before you. And before you know it, you’re pouring your awe and fascination into each stroke of your pencil. Your eyes flicker up and down as you commit the details to mind, heart pounding every time with the fear of being caught.
Though you're cautious about it, you’re too lost in his eyes to catch the way the male’s lips curve slightly upwards.
**
Lucien takes the last sip of his coffee, admiring the sight before him. The sun is beginning to set, painting the sky in twilight hues and dancing across the Sidra River. Along the riverwalk, Fae stroll leisurely. Couples walk hand in hand, children skipping along the cobblestone path, pausing to catch the fireflies that are now visible in the dimming light.
Velaris was proving to be more beautiful with each passing day—a sight he’d never expected from a place like the Night Court. All his life, he had only come to know the Court of Nightmares. A place that truly lived up to his name. And though there were children laughing and running freely, he couldn’t help but still be wary of the City of Starlight. It was still part of the Night Court, after all.
His eyes scan along the riverwalk, golden eye making a soft sound as it moves, in search of something. Or rather, someone. Just as a frown is about to settle on his face, he finds what he was searching for. The reason why he was at this cafe…despite the fact that the best espresso in town was at a little coffee shop in the Rainbow of Velaris.
You.
You are sitting at a bench, knees drawn up and a sketchbook nestled onto your lap. As the sun continues to make its descent, the street lamp near you croaks to life. It bathes you in its soft glow and he is able to appreciate the slight furrow of your brow, the slight way your lips purse in concentration. He wants to know what you're drawing.
Ever since he caught you staring at him at this very cafe, he had an inkling as to what may be hidden within those pages of your sketchbook. He had meant to approach you about it but you had been so into your sketch, he found the sight endearing and feared disrupting you.
So he had left you to it and showed up to the cafe the next day at the same time in the hopes of seeing you again and he did. That time, your gazes had met and though it had been brief, it felt everlasting. He remembers the way your cheeks tinted with blush before you turned your head away, flustered at being caught. If only you had seen the way he had smiled softly to himself afterwards.
It’s been days since that incident. Though he didn’t find you in that same spot the day after, he came to the conclusion that this was your favorite area to frequent in Velaris. It slowly became his too, his eyes always finding you amongst the busy riverwalk.
Lucien had never been the shy type–at least, not when it came to pursuing people he was interested in. He had just been waiting for the right time–for the right moment to talk to you. And as you closed your sketchbook with a light exhale, his heart fluttered as he realized what better time than now.
**
Calling it a night, you close your sketchbook with a soft sigh. The sun had been replaced by the moon and the street lamp’s light was too dim for your liking to continue you drawing. You feared messing up what you had meticulously spent hours on. As you rise from the bench and turn to make your way back home, you bump into a smaller frame than yours, the sketchbook in your hold falling from your grasp.
“Sorry, miss!” A lively voice chirps and when you look toward the source, the small child is already far away from you. Kids, you muse to yourself as you turn back around.
Your breath catches in your throat. Standing right in front of you is the male who has become your muse.
But he’s not looking at you.
No, he’s looking at the sketchbook on the ground. Your heart skips a beat, heat rising to your face. The sketchbook had opened to the pages you've been working on—the ones with multiple sketches of his eyes.
You’re frozen in horror, watching as he studies your work. None of you say anything for a moment. It’s when his gaze lifts to yours that you spring into action. “Oh,” you gasp, beginning to bend your knees to gather your belongings. You're absolutely mortified, praying to the Cauldron he can’t hear how fast your heart is racing.
“I’m so sorry.”
Before your hand can reach for your sketchbook, another hand beats you to it.
“Don’t be,” he says, his voice deep and enchanting, causing your hand to freeze in midair. There seems to be a magnetic pull in his words, a sincerity that makes your heart flutter. Is there anything about this male that is not attractive?
“I’ve never seen the beauty of my eyes until now.”
The words are spilling from your mouth before you can stop them. “You’re joking, right?”
He’s knelt before you, his hand hovering over your book. But instead of picking it up for you, he grasps for your hand instead. It’s warm and calloused yet feels so good against yours. Like heaven. His eyes finally meet yours, holding you captive. He slowly brings your hand to his lips, and you don’t think you’re breathing as he presses his lips against your skin.
“No,” he grins as he rises to his full height, using his free hand to grab your sketchbook before bringing you with him. “I’m Lucien.”
It takes you a moment to realize he is waiting for you to speak, his presence overwhelming but exhilarating.
“I’m—” you clear your throat to steady your voice. “I’m y/n.”
“y/n,” Lucien repeats with a smile, finally handing you over your sketchbook.
You take it, immediately clutching the book tightly to your chest and avert your gaze, casting it downwards. “I promise I’m not a creep. I was drawing the Sidra–well, attempting to, anyway. But then you came along, blocking my view and something came over me. You see, I’ve been struggling with artist block and your eyes–your eyes are so pretty”--and under your breath, you mutter–” All of you is, if I’m going to be honest…”–Lucien’s smile widens at that–”and I finally felt inspired–oh gods, I’m rambling. I should just shut my mouth.”
Lucien’s russet eye twinkles with amusement. “I inspired you?”
“Yes,” you answer quietly and bashfully.
“Then perhaps,” he says, his voice low and intimate. “I should let you inspire me as well.”
Slowly, you lift your head back up, meeting his eyes once more. A wave of relief surges through you as you find nothing but sincerity and shared interest in his gentle gaze. You find yourself mirroring his smile, and something warm blossoms in Lucien’s chest—the start of something beautiful.
And he can’t help but think that maybe, just maybe, the Night Court isn’t so bad after all.
a/n: okay, that's enough Lucien for now. Can't keep letting him distract me because I need to focus back on the other Vanserra *cough* Eris *cough*
general tag list: @scooobies, @kennedy-brooke, @sillysillygoose444, @lilah-asteria @the-sweet-psycho
@daycourtofficial, @milswrites, @stormhearty, @pit-and-the-pen
#lucien x reader#lucien x you#lucien x y/n#acotar fanfiction#lucien vanserra x you#lucien vanserra x reader#lucien vanserra fanfiction#acotar x reader#acotar imagine#lucien vanserra#lucien vanserra fluff#acotar fluff
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Chapter 14: Don't Be A Bundt Cake
Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV, Soldier Boy POV
Summary: When you decided to work with Butcher and his merry band of supe hunters to take down Homelander, you never expected to be saddled with a sullen, grumpy, jerk like Soldier Boy when the job was done. The more you're around him the more you hate him, but you can't help but wonder, is he really as big a jerk as you think? Reader is a supe with plant powers. This takes place in an AU about a month after the end of The Boys Season 3, in which Butcher has let Soldier Boy continue to work with him on his team. (I'm real bad at summaries, please forgive me!)
Tropes: Enemies to Lovers (Not in this chapter), Slow Burn, Age Difference (Reader is in her 20s), Soft Ben/ Soldier Boy, Protective Ben/Soldier Boy, Miscommunication Trope
Word Count: 13.1K
Warnings: I'm going to label this 18+ because Soldier Boy (he's a warning and everyone knows it), Swearing, Mentions of Sex, Sexual Innuendo, Talks of Death, DENIAL, Idiots in Love, Pining by the Reader (and SB, but he won't admit it) Depressing Thoughts, Mentions of sexual assault/rape (not detailed at all, really just in passing) Talks about weed, Sexist comments, Ben makes derogatory comments, Threatening Ben/Soldier Boy might be a little bit OOC.
Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!
Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person.
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Series Masterlist
Main Masterlist
A/N: I am so sorry this one took me a bit longer. The writers block was fighting me the whole way, but we are very closely nearing the end of this series and the moment the reader and Ben stop being so stinkin' stubborn.

Reader POV
You lean your forehead against the cool window, watching the world flash by in a flurry of color. The wooded forests had vanished hours ago and all that was left were the yellowed sprawling fields of corn and grain and family farms that were laid sporadically along the interstate. Each one a little world that caught the flecks of golden sunlight as the sun began to peak above the horizon.
The bus rolled smooth and steady over the weathered pavement towards it's destination and was filled with an odd assortment of people young and old. There was man with a brightly colored parrot that had been singing "It's A Small World After All" since you left NYC, a woman with a little boy playing with an iPad and who refused to turn down the volume no matter how many times his mother asked him to, a group of teenagers a few seats up that continued to pass around a flask, and due to how far back you were sitting on the bus an uncomfortable smell emanated from the bathroom each time the door was opened.
But you didn't notice any of it.
The only thing on your mind were the events that happened almost twenty hours ago. They continued to circle your mind, playing over and over again like a perverted cassette tape making you sink further into the worn cloth covered seat at the back of the bus. The images were haunting, some new and some old, but all the more still horrible to re-live.
The song "Nights In White Satin" floating into the backseat of your family's car, the flash of unnatural light you knew was never lightning, the caskets at your parent's funeral covered in flowers that were much to pretty to lay on something so morbid, Elijah's body succumbing to the poppies that ripped him apart, the proud sneer on your brother's face when he admitted to killing your parents, Darren's broken and bloodied body strewn in pieces over the street with the creature standing over him with a dripping red maw, the ruined building that housed "Please Don't Die" reduced to nothing more than rubble, and the look on Ben's face when you turned your back on him and fled the scene.
For some reason that particular image seemed to cling on to you and refused to fade. You'd never seen him look that way, almost… helpless and a little fearful. In all the time you'd known him, Ben had never looked at you that way. Sure you'd seen him proud, angry, cocky, lustful, mischievous, but never fearful. And you were sure that it wasn't an emotion that he was used to feeling, but that begged the question… why?
Why was he looking at me like that? Why wouldn't he let me go? And what was he afraid of?
The creature curled in your lap snorts something in it's sleep, turning it’s head further into the cradle of your elbow to shut out the brilliant early morning sunlight. It was now the size of a toaster and had warranted several odd looks whenever you got off to change buses, but you didn't care.
You weren't sure about anything anymore. Everything your brother confessed to you made you feel like you were living a lie and the revelation of exactly what your powers could do- take life from plants to heal yourself, create whatever the hell it was on your lap, and speak to plants… it scared you.
You thought for so long that you knew everything about your powers, that you were in control, but now you weren't sure.
You felt different, as if something had unlocked deep down that you couldn't shut up again.
You'd felt different after you killed Elijah, but this was more alive, weaving and twisting in the pit of your stomach. You felt more connected to the earth, to the world outside the bus even though you were divided by glass and metal. You could feel the energy that thrummed through the body of the creature on your lap, bending to your will, the life force of the plants it was formed from molding with you, becoming a part of you.
You felt so different than the person you had been before Darren entered the shop, so uncertain, and there was only one place you wanted to be when you felt like this… home. You couldn't wait to run up the worn front steps of your grandmother's house and into her arms. She always knew what to say in times like this.
And you desperately needed the comfort of her embrace.
The phone in your pocket buzzes again and you flip the screen to see the ridiculous selfie Annie and you had taken on Halloween last year. The one that you'd both spent dressed up as the two brothers from your favorite paranormal tv show. It wasn't the first time she'd called. Annie had called and texted you more times than you could count over the past twenty hours but you didn't answer her. You didn’t want to.
It was the first time that you didn't want to talk to her, but talking to her meant that you'd have to re-live all of it again and you were clawing at the last shred of sanity you had left to keep it together.
The overwhelming waves of emotion kept pummeling you, dragging you deeper beneath the white surf. Each one brought the memories of what happened surging over you and were followed by everything that Darren said to you. Years of taking care of Darren and doing whatever he wished were tearing at your soul, years of giving up little things in your life to make him happy, and years of taking care of a man who you thought cared about you, but hated you enough to kill your parents and try to kill you too.
It made your skin crawl. Each time your brother told you that he loved you was an even bigger lie and now that you knew the truth and saw him for what he was, it felt like you were drowning. The darkness that ebbed just on the edge was begging you to leap into the abyss, but you were resisting the best you could.
The tears had stopped falling miles ago, but you couldn't stop the memories or the emotion that formed a cold ball in the pit of your stomach.
A sigh works it's way up and you pull your legs on the seat underneath you, jostling the creature on your lap that raises it's head for a moment to blink it's black eyes at you sleepily.
It was surprisingly docile right now, especially considering that twenty hours ago it had ripped your brother to shreds. In fact it seemed to understand how upset you were and had spent the better part of the last twenty hours rubbing it's head against your arm as if trying to bring you some comfort. It was settled on your lap, the weight of it a comfort, almost like a weighted plushy that gave you something to focus on.
"It's alright buddy." You whisper, scratching him under his chin. "We're almost home."
The phone in your jacket pocket buzzes again, but when you pull it out to turn it off, you catch a glimpse of the screen, and you hesitate. Because this time it's not Annie who's calling, it’s Ben.
The picture that flashes on the screen under the contact name "Gramps" is the picture of Mr. Fredrickson from Up. It always made you smile whenever he called you and you saw the picture because Ben did often remind you of him. He was certainly just as grumpy as Mr. Fredrickson and just as out of touch, but you thought it was cute.
Your thumb hovers over the answer button and you think about talking to him.
But what would I say?
You weren't sure what to say to him, or why you wanted to speak to him so badly, why you wanted him to be sitting here on the bus with you as you went home, and why you wanted him to hold you against his chest while you allowed yourself to break, but you did. You wanted to feel his awkward shoulder pat and his awkward version of hand holding and you wanted to hear him try to tell you to "buck up" or whatever he thought that a comforting word should be.
He's really not the best at that.
You smile to yourself at the memory of how he tried to comfort you back at the hospital, but the longer you sit there and look down at the picture on the screen the worse you feel.
Maybe that scared you more than your newfound powers, how much you were realizing that you needed him, how much you depended on him when things got too much for you to bear. The memory of him appearing as soon as you needed him back at the shop, another of him grabbing Darren and throwing him into the street as soon as Darren insulted you comes in a flash, and finally followed by the memory of Ben carrying you out of Elijah's office while you curled into his chest. You couldn't remember too much from that moment, in fact you'd thought that Ben had kissed you on top of your head, but you ascribed that to the haze of pain you'd been in from your broken arm.
What you did remember was how wonderfully warm he was after you'd been trapped in that damn freezer and how nice it felt to be in his arms. Another memory of Ben sleeping on the couch at the hospital bubbles up and you feel something in your chest begin to crack open. And you try your best to tell yourself the same thing that you always do when you feel like Ben might care more about you that he was letting on.
Ben doesn't want that. He's made it perfectly clear. He doesn't want a relationship. He's only wants one night, that's why he goes out with all those women-
You hesitate, thumb still hovering over the answer button as you do, the memory of the week you'd spent at the apartment with him flickering in the back of your mind. The week where he refused to leave you alone in the apartment, where he refused to do any jobs for Butcher, where he took care of you the best way he could, when he sat with you on the couch and made you laugh with his ridiculous movies, and the week where he hadn't had one date.
Your finger itched to answer the phone, but you couldn't, because you didn't want to feel this way about Ben, not when he'd told you countless times that you kept romanticizing him, not when he told you that he didn't want a relationship, and not when you could feel yourself beginning to fall for someone you thought was the wrong man.
For just a moment you tried to pretend that it was different, that he was different, but you didn't want to. It only made it hurt more.
The phone stops ringing, but the pit in your stomach still gapes open at you and for the first time in twenty hours you feel tears begin to fall. You didn't know why you were crying about this, why the thought of not picking up Ben's phone call seemed to hurt more than everything that had happened, but something made it hurt.
The bus driver announces over the overhead that you're reaching your final destination as he takes the exit for your hometown. The familiar buildings that line the streets are sheathed in a honeyed glow from the sun, the long shadow of the bus darkening them momentarily as it rumbles down the small streets to the bus station.
When it rumbles to a stop at the bus station you wait for everyone else to get off, trying to summon the strength to stand, and swipe the back of your hand across your face to rid yourself of the remaining tears.
The bus station was about a thirty minute walk from your grandmother's house, and you still hadn't called her. You didn't know what to say, didn't know how to tell her that Darren was dead and that he was the reason why your parents were dead.
The creature crawls up your body to drape it's warm body over the back of your neck as you stand. It wasn't bothering to hide, besides the people in your hometown already thought that you were odd because you were a supe and you'd always welcomed it. You give him a scratch on top of his head and his warm tongue flicks on the bottom of your earlobe as if thanking you before it curls further into the side of your neck, seeking warmth.
The first few steps on solid ground are shaky, but you find the strength while taking in a deep cleansing breath of the outside world, letting the gentle warmth of the sun and the tickle of the autumn breeze pull at your coat. You hadn't stopped at your apartment before coming here, instead you had stumbled your way to the bus station covered in dust, flecked in blood, and demanded the first ticket back to Illinois. It was lucky that the next bus was leaving immediately, because you didn’t want to spend another second in NYC, not when all you wanted was to be home.
Plus you were worried that someone had recorded what exactly happened outside the plant shop and you didn't want to get arrested.
It was self defense anyway. Maybe Jake would represent me in court.
The thought of Jake makes you twinge. You hadn't checked to see if he was alright before you ran from the scene. Not to mention you'd destroyed the shop he'd put all his life savings into after he stopped being a lawyer.
Oh fuck, what if he sues me? He can't exactly sue Darren…
You hear someone call your name and you open your eyes.
Your grandmother is standing in front of the same baby blue pickup truck that she'd had longer than you've been alive, wearing a long multicolored skirt and a pressed white blouse tucked elegantly into it. Her silver hair is loose and long, curling over her shoulders in gentle waves. She looks the same way she looked one week ago when she left, and you've never seen anything so beautiful in your life.
You're running before you can stop yourself, crumbling into her warm embrace, with more tears streaking down your face, but she doesn't mind.
"Shh. It's alright honey." She whispers, rubbing her hand over your back, her embrace steady and surprisingly strong. "Let's go home."

Her home is the same as it's always been. A two story Victorian house painted in a happy yellow shade, with a white wrap around porch and two white rocking chairs sitting empty on the front porch. You'd spent more nights than you could count rocking silently beside her with a crochet project in your lap listening to the rain fall and soak the world outside, while the plants sang praises with every gentle bend beneath the heavy droplets.
You could barely remember the home you spent in your early years with your parents, not when you'd spent most of your childhood spending the night here and after your parents died living here permanently. There was still a large oak tree were a wooden swing swung in the slight breeze on the left side of the yard, a gardenia bush that stretched as high as the second story on the right side of the house and brushed it's soft leaves against the sunshine colored outer walls, a garden filled with both flowering plants and herbs that perked up on both sides of the front yard as you walked up the path, and a cobblestone path that Annie and you had spent hours of your shared childhood covering in chalk art.
Neither of you were good, but when the rain would fall and smudge the clean lines, you'd jump in the puddles that pooled along the walkway singing the lyrics to ABBA's "Cassandra" not quite understanding what it meant.
Standing here outside your house made you miss Annie and feel worse about not calling or texting her back, but you didn't feel like talking about what happened and you were sure that Butcher filled her in. The only thing that you wanted was to collapse in your bedroom upstairs and curl under the comforters.
Despite everything the house was a welcome sight, but at the same time it was different. You could feel the plants calling out to you, asking for you, bending towards you just to touch your shoes as you walked by. You'd never felt so connected with them before, not even when you were in your apartment or working at the shop. It was overwhelming.
And although a part of you was frightened by it, another part of you rejoiced in it. You didn't feel alone, didn't feel weak, and you knew that you never would ever again.
The creature nuzzled into the side of your neck with a sigh, soaking up the sun's healing rays as you walked up the front steps with your grandmother following behind you silently. She hadn't spoken since she picked you up at the bus station and you hadn't supplied anything in the ten minute car ride back to her house.
You didn't know where to start and you were still trying to process everything yourself.
The inside of her house was just as cozy and warm as it was the day you moved out. There were photos of your parents and you covering the walls (Darren's had been placed in the closet long ago), half-finished knitting projects sorted in different baskets on both the dining room table and the living room coffee table, spools of yarn were strewn over the couch sorted by color, and the fresh smell of gardenia wafted through the open windows on the breeze.
It was home. This was what you'd been missing the moment everything began to crash over you, but as you stood there in the familiar living room it felt like something was missing. Something tugged at the back of your mind, but you couldn't put your finger on it.
There was something or rather someone that should be here, but you didn't know what or who. And your mind supplied Annie, but you weren't sure that's who you meant.
"Let's have some tea." Your grandmother says from behind you and you feel her soft hands come down on your shoulders to steer you through the familiar creative chaos and into the large kitchen at the back of the house.
The kitchen isn't spared from the madness, it rarely was. There are boxes upon boxes of cookies in different stages of being packaged all over the counter, dirty bowls and a measuring cup stacked in the sink, and a large opened bag of chocolate chips spilling over the flour covered kitchen island.
It wasn't unusual to find the kitchen or the house in a state of chaos, your grandmother always said that a house should look lived in and that the mess was part of the fun of any major project as long as you were responsible enough to clean it up.
"Bake sale?" You ask as you sit down in the breakfast nook, uttering the first words that you'd said to another human being in twenty hours.
The next breath that you inhale was supposed to be cleansing, but you can still feel a weight pressing down on your chest, the same one that settled in the moment everything happened with Darren.
You contemplate again how you're going to tell her that Darren is dead and was the reason why your parents died.
Damn it Darren.
"Mhmm." She hums, filling the well used red kettle. "Annie's mother practically cornered me in the supermarket yesterday and begged me to make cookies. I love Annie, but her mother needs someone to pull that stick out of her ass. It's been up there for so long that I'm sure it's rotten."
The creature crawls down from your shoulders and down your arm to sniff at one of the chocolate chip cookies nearest you. It hadn't eaten since…
Darren.
You wince slightly at the thought and hope that you hadn't created something that needed and craved human flesh. The last thing you wanted to unleash on the world was Audry two especially in the wake of Homelander.
Truthfully you were waiting for the guilt at killing your brother to come, but it never had and you wondered if it ever would.
Probably not. He deserved that, he killed our parents, he tried to kill me, he tried to kill Ben.
The thought of Ben again makes a lump form in the back of your throat. You didn't know what was happening to you only that you felt guilty for leaving him like that, for yelling at him to let you go, and just vanishing on him when he probably thought that you were going back to the apartment.
He doesn't know where I am. Maybe that's why he tried to call, because he got back to the apartment and couldn't find me there and he was worried. You press your lips together. Yeah. Worried. Right.
"Honey?" Your grandmother says in a soothing voice
You look up from the box of chocolate chip cookies that you didn't remember picking up. Even the creature is looking at you with an expression that you can only explain as worry.
"Yeah?" Your voice shakes slightly.
She's leaning back against the counter, arms crossed over her chest, head tilted slightly to the side, her beautiful grayed hair pulled up in an elegant bun, but in her eyes you can see genuine concern. "Fuck." She sighs after a minute.
You blink in surprise. It was the first time that you'd ever heard her say that word in your entire life.
"I shouldn't have left." She breathes. "I told Ben to look out for you. I told him, that little bastard was bound to show up again and what did he do? He left you at that plant shop alone with no protection!"
You'd only seen her really angry a handful of times in your lifetime. Like you, your grandmother often had a gentle disposition and didn't get angry unless the situation called for it.
I mean, Darren admitted to killing our parents and then got fucking ripped apart. But how does she know about any of that? I haven't told her…
"How did you know that he left me there? Did Ben call you?" You ask putting down the box of cookies.
An odd expression crosses her face, as if she's contemplating something. "No." She hesitates again. "I saw it."
"No." Your grandmother hesitates. "I saw it."
"You saw it?" You repeat, confused.
What's going on?
"Too late of course, but I'm a little rusty. I was able to warn Ben that Darren was coming back. That's how he got there so quickly or rather-" She shrugs sheepishly. "He got there in time to make sure that Darren didn't get you to forgive him. Which you shouldn't have at all, but I know he's always had a talent for manipulating you."
"What?"
Is she saying what I think she's saying?
Instead of explaining further your grandmother walks out of the kitchen, leaving the kettle behind on the stove and you in a state of utter confusion.
Is she saying that she can see the future? Because that would mean that she's a supe and there's only one supe in history that I know of that can do that. A supe that no one has seen in over forty years.
You can hear her open the door to the closet under the stairs and the sound of her sifting through all the junk that the two of you had shoved in there over the years instead of finding the right place to put it.
When she comes back into the kitchen, she's holding a giant cardboard file box that you'd never paid attention to each time you opened the closet to find something. Your eyes shift from the box to her still not comprehending exactly what she was saying.
"I probably should have told you this a while ago, but…" She trails off and nods her head at the box before turning back to the kettle on the stove that has begun to scream. "I kept putting it off."
The box is old, worn at the edges, and theres a musty black fabric beneath a collection of yellowed photographs. You pull out the one on top to examine it.
Ben is standing there in his full Soldier Boy regalia outside of Vought tower and the woman standing next to him is Soothsayer. The outfit she wore was familiar, a black-skin tight suit with a blind fold tied over her eyes.
Soothsayer was a supe who could see the future and who was apart of Payback, a supe that had vanished a year before the mission in Nicaragua and no one knew where she went. There were rumors that she'd died and that she'd been a Russian spy, but you'd never believed them. You'd heard Butcher talk about how he tried to find her when he was trying to figure out what happened to Soldier Boy, but he never had. Said that the trail went cold.
But now you knew where she went, because she was standing directly in front of you.
She's Soothsayer? Holy fuck that's why Ben kept accusing her of cheating in the poker game because he knew that she could see the future.
"You were Soothsayer?" You gasp. "But why didn't you say anything? Why didn't you tell me?"
She continues to measure the tea leaves. "I didn't tell anyone."
"Grandpa didn't know? But he was alive when you were a supe?"
Your grandfather had never spoken about a history with supes that you remember.
"No." She turns to look at you, a hurt expression crossing over her face for a minute. "Well, I know that I said I was going to have tea, but if we're going to talk about this I'm going to need something a little bit stronger."
Your grandmother opens a cabinet under the stove an pulls out an enormous bottle of scotch. Truth be told you'd never seen her drink more than just a glass of wine, to see her like this was about as shocking as seeing a polar bear sunning itself on a Florida beach.
"Do you still want the blueberry tea or do you need something a little stronger?" She looks back over her shoulder at you as she pulls down a glass for herself.
"I think I need something stronger." You answer honestly.
Learning about everything Darren had done was one thing, but finding out that your grandmother used to be a famous supe and that she never told you about it was another thing. It was like looking at another person. You'd always loved your grandmother's gentle way, her care for her community and her family soft, but now you weren't sure you really knew who she was.
She sits down across from you and hands you a glass of the amber colored liquid. There's a heavy silence that hangs between the two of you as she tries to find a way to start. The photo of her and Ben is laying on top of what you realize is her uniform inside the box and she smiles down at the photo, just a little twitch at the corner of her lips.
"I met Ben when I was twenty three years old." She begins taking a sip from the glass. "Legend 'discovered' me. I had the injection of Compound V maybe two years before that, not when I was born, but I hadn't gotten popular. Other powers were much more flashy and by then there were so many heroes coming out of the woodwork that someone with the ability to see the future didn't seem as marketable."
There's something reflected in her blue eyes, the same eyes your father had, that you can't place. "I had just moved to New York, I had no money, and the way I was getting it was by pretending to be a fortune teller and betting on some sports events on the side. It wasn't hard to prove that I could see the future, the past was more difficult, but Legend somehow stumbled into my shop and figured out that I was a supe. And he didn't think I was too bad looking so he helped me get big."
"You pretended to be a fortune teller?"
She snorts into her glass. "Mhmm. People really will believe anything if they're desperate enough and back then there was so much turmoil going on with Russia that people were scared and wanted to feel comforted. My job provided some of that."
"But why did you walk away from it if you were such a big hero." You ask. "Everyone knew your name, you were-"
Your grandmother raises an eyebrow at you and you fall silent so she can continue. "When I got onto Payback that's when everything exploded for me, the films, the commercials, the ridiculous ads." She sighs. "That's also when I met Ben."
You take a sip from the glass in front of you, sputtering slightly. It was stronger than you were expecting. "And you two were-"
Please don't say dating, please don't say dating, please don't say…
"Friends. Just friends." Diana sits back against the back of the breakfast nook, sinking into the navy blue pillows. "But he is almost as charming now as he was then."
You cringe at the thought of Ben coming on to a younger version of your grandmother.
She taps her glass with her index finger deep in thought. "But I think that I was the only person that Ben actually talked to, the only person that he was comfortable being around."
"What do you mean?" You ask confused. "Didn't he talk to Countess and to Legend?"
Her expression hardens at the mention of Countess's name. "He didn't talk to her the way he talked to me. Ben is difficult, he always has been and I think that most of the people he meet him write him off as this asshole with a chauvinistic look on the world, but he's not. At least, not all the time. There are so many people that he's met that are never willing to take a chance on him. To trust that there is really something beneath all of that bravado."
It was what you had been thinking for the past week, that there was more to Ben than he was willing to let people see, but you were slowly realizing that Ben was letting you see those parts. In the quiet moments at your shared apartment when he sat with you while you read or made you laugh or walked you to and from work you saw another side of Ben that you never saw when he was around anyone else. The guilt rises again when you think of how you ran from him, how you turned your back and left him standing there to clean up your mess.
I shouldn’t have done that, but it was all just so overwhelming and I didn't want to talk to anyone.
"I think that Ben is the most loyal friend I ever had. No one ever seems to believe me when I say that. That we were just friends, but nothing happened between us."
"You didn't date? Or sleep together?" You ask cautiously. It was difficult to imagine Ben being friends with a woman and not having a sexual relationship with her.
Well. We're friends, but that's different.
The last thing you wanted to think about was Ben and your grandmother having sex.
I would need so much therapy after that. You sigh. Yeah, because after all the shit I've been through and found out about my life in the last twenty hours, the knowledge that Ben fucked my grandmother is what's going to push me over the edge.
"No." She shakes her head with a small smile. "About a week after I met Ben, I was running late to a movie shoot and I stepped off the crosswalk without looking. There was a car coming and I didn't see it. Ironic isn't it?" She laughs at herself. "I can see the future and I didn't see a car coming, but your grandfather did and he grabbed the back of my jacket and yanked me onto the sidewalk, saved my life. And the second my eyes locked with his I saw our future. I saw our wedding, our first house, I saw our son take his first steps and I saw how much I would love him and how much he would love me." She clears her throat for a minute, her fingers tighten on the glass, and her gaze drops to the wedding ring on her left hand. “The future is never set in stone, it’s fluid. It morphs and shapes with your decisions, but in the future I saw, I was so happy. And I didn’t want to lose that.”
Your grandfather had passed a few years ago, but you knew it weighed on her everyday. She had spent the week after he died in her room not saying anything to anyone. And sometimes she'd look out the window into the backyard with an odd expression, but you knew that meant she was thinking of him.
Growing up you'd seen how in love the two of them were, more so than your parents. Seen the flowers your grandfather always brought home just because he was thinking of her, watched him do little things around the house without being asked, saw how they never walked away angry from one another, and seen the soppy expression he'd get when he watched your grandmother move around the kitchen baking with a grace that you'd never possessed.
You reach across the table to touch her hand and she takes it gratefully.
"I didn't want to tell him that I was a supe, and at the beginning I thought I could balance it all, but then Ben started dating Countess." She takes another sip from her glass. "She hated me."
"What? Why?" You ask. The creature crawls across the table to sniff at the glass in front of you, before it snorts and falls into your lap, curling into a ball.
"Countess was a bitch." Your grandmother says mirthlessly, her expression hardening. "She wanted to possess Ben completely. Only loved how famous he was, how popular it made her, and he threw himself at her feet, in his own way, not understanding that love didn’t look that way. He’s never had a good example of it in his life. And she never understood that Ben and I were just friends. By then I had been dating your grandfather for a few months and things were getting serious. It was about a year before everything that happened in Nicaragua."
She presses her lips together as if remembering what happened to Ben there. "She was jealous, possessive, and she came to me one night. Ben was out of town for a film so she knew we wouldn’t be interrupted. She threatened to tell your grandfather who I really was and threatened to kill him.” Her jaw sets. “My powers were never really as offensive as hers were. And she said that Ben wouldn’t ever protect me over her because he loved her and would do anything to make her happy. So I left and I never looked back.”
And here I thought I couldn't hate Countess any more than I did for what she did to Ben.
“You didn’t talk to him ever again?” You wonder out loud.
She left without telling him goodbye?
“There was the occasional phone call. Sometimes Ben would ask me to see who was going to win a ball game or something so he could make a few bucks. He stopped by to say hi a few times because he was in the neighborhood. One time he brought your father a baseball glove that was way too big for a one year old.” She snorts, the memory flashing in her eyes. “I always thought Ben would be a good dad some day. But I think seeing your father was when Ben realized how much he wanted to have kids. And I think seeing the way your grandfather treated me made him start to feel conflicted about Countess. But he respected that I walked away, he saw that I was happy.”
“But what about Nicaragua?"
A dark look crosses her face followed by something that looks suspiciously like guilt. “I saw what they were going to do to him.”
“What? But why didn't you tell him what they were planning? Why didn't you-"
"I tried." She snaps, shoulders tense, but then they drop. "I called Ben, but Stan answered. By then your father was turning two, your grandfather had opened up his practice, and Stan threatened me, he knew where we were and knew everything about us. So I kept my mouth shut and I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.”
You could feel your heart breaking for her.
Ben was her best friend and she had to sit by and watch them do that to him. She saw what they were going to do and they were going to kill her for it, kill my family for it.
The anger that surges in your chest makes the creature in your lap stir and grow a few inches, but you tamp it down before it gets bigger than a small dog.
“Does Ben know?” You ask her to distract yourself.
You didn't want Ben to hate your grandmother for this, didn't want him to hate her for something that wasn't her fault.
She nods. “Yes. I told him everything.”
“When?”
“The moment I saw him in your hospital room. I couldn’t keep it in any longer. I wasn't expecting him to be there, but it all poured out of me. I was so surprised to see him there. I hadn't seen a future where he came back."
“Was he mad?”
I mean… he didn't seem mad when I woke up, not to mention he was upset when she left to come back to Illinois.
“Not at me.” She shakes her head. “He knew how much I wanted a normal life and how much I loved your grandfather. He doesn’t blame me for any of it.”
“Good. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”
The glass in front of you is still more than half-full but you don't want to risk another sip of what you're sure is gasoline packaged to look like Scotch. Your grandmother reaches to pour herself another glass.
“I didn’t want to until you were ready.”
“And when would that be?”
Your grandmother shrugs. “Maybe on my deathbed.”
You weren't angry for her not telling you, more surprised, but now that you knew everything about her it was hard to see her the same way you had.
You snort. “And no one knew?”
“Your dad figured it out.”
“How? When?”
“The moment you made that strawberry plant grow from your high chair.” She shakes her head with a smile. “It skipped a generation. Don’t know why, but you got it all somehow.”
“I was never injected?”
“No. That was a lie your father created. He knew that your grandfather didn't know and he knew that I didn't want your grandfather to know."
“Darren thought I was.”
“I know.”
At the mention of your brother's name, you watch her expression harden and she takes another swig from the glass in front of her, not flinching as the liquid goes down her throat.
“Did you see everything that happened?” You ask in a small voice.
You still weren't 100% sure how it was her powers worked, but you figured that she was able to see some of what Darren did and what he said.
“Yes.”
“You heard everything Darren said?"
“Yes.”
You chew the inside of your cheek for a minute hoping that she didn't take it as hard as you did. “Did you know that he killed them?”
“No.” She breathes, rolling the glass between her hands for a moment. “The night they died, I got a vision a few minutes before the car ran off the road. I was the one who called the police and who told them where to look, but I never saw that it was Darren or that it was anyone causing the accident. All I saw was the three of you in the car. I should have known.” Her voice breaks.
“It’s not your fault.” You squeeze her hand.
“And it’s not yours either.” She squeezes your hand back.
The memories are beginning to float up from the recesses of your mind and your teeth clench together as you try to keep them at bay.
“I know.” You breathe. The memory of the ruined shop flashes through your head. “I didn’t know that I could do something like that.” You gently touch your healed right arm and glance at the creature that is nibbling on the edge of the cardboard box with its sharp splinter-like teeth. “I feel so different and I don’t know how to go back to the way I was.”
“I don’t think you ever will.”
"Really?"
The thought was unwelcome. You were hoping that all of this was going to blow over, but you knew it wouldn't. Your powers had changed. There was an energy that thrummed in your veins now, stretching out of the house to the plants that grew in the garden. You could feel them all if you concentrated.
She frowns. “When you told me that you were working for Butcher I was worried about you getting involved in the supe world. I didn’t want that life for you, didn’t want you to suffer the way I did-“
“Was it really that bad?"
“Not all the time, just at the end. But I think that’s why I loved your grandfather so much. Because he was different than all the supes. He was down to earth, not just normal but-“ She shrugs. “I think Compound V does something to our minds, makes them more susceptible and when you’re surrounded by people using their powers and thinking that they’re gods it’s easy to lose who you are. I was glad I left when I did."
“Great." You huff, thinking about how your powers had grown exponentially since you killed your brother. It was scaring you to think that you would reach a point where you acted like Homelander, where you saw yourself as a god and killed anyone who stood in your way.
As tired as the stereotype of you only being able to make the flowers grow, you liked doing that. You liked healing plants, tending to them, and helping them grow. For you it had never been about using your powers the way that you had to kill Elijah and your brother and had always been about spreading a little more joy and love like your grandmother did with her kindness in her community.
Your mind flashes back to the first night that Ben stayed with you in your apartment and he'd asked you why you worked for Butcher and told you that he thought you "didn't fit."
Before you hadn't. You knew that. You weren't intimidating to look at or fueled by revenge or had a bone to pick with supes. You'd joined because you thought it was the right thing to do and because you wanted to be closer with Annie. She had been so involved in the supe world and you'd felt like you were losing your best friend. When in reality being at "Please Don't Die" was the only thing that felt natural for you.
You could feel yourself changing and you weren't sure that you wanted to and you weren't sure if you were changing for the better. Deep down you still felt like you, despite everything Darren had revealed, but your powers were greater than you'd thought they could be.
“No.” She squeezes your hand pulling you out of your head. “I don’t see you losing yourself in this.”
“You’ve seen-“ Your eyes widen.
“The future yeah.” Her lips twitch up at the ends in a smile. “It is what I do.”
“That’s so weird.”
You hadn't meant to say it, but you really didn't want to know too much about your future.
Well, not all that much. Maybe just a little.
“You of all people have no right to judge what’s weird. Not with Godzilla sitting in your lap.”
"Godzilla" yawns, flashing a mouthful of his pointy teeth, before settling back down on your thighs.
You smile for the first time in twenty hours, but then it drops. “I don’t like losing control. I thought I knew who I was but now I don’t-“ The emotions were bubbling up again, chest tightening, and lungs beginning to gasp for air. “I don’t know who I am anymore or what I am or what I can do and-“
“There’s nothing wrong with not being in control.”
“But what if I hurt someone? What if I kill-“ You body shakes as you think about all the important people in your life, Annie, Hughie, Butcher, Kimiko, MM, Frenchie- and then your mind stutters on Ben.
“Your powers are growing and there’s nothing to be afraid of or ashamed of. If you’re afraid of them it won’t get easier for you. You have to embrace the fear to see the lights that line the path through it.”
"I killed Darren, I killed Elijah-"
"Not because you lost control. You did it because you were protecting yourself and protecting your friends."
"But-"
"Who is it that you're scared of hurting? Annie?" Her expression turns sympathetic. "Annie is a supe and understands what it's like to lose control. None of us are in control all the time and it's ridiculous to believe that you won't lose control at least once."
Your throat clenches tightly, because when she asked the question you didn't see Annie's face, you saw Ben's. You knew that it was probably ridiculous to worry about hurting a guy with a nuclear reactor stuffed in his chest or a guy who'd been through every torture known to man, but you were. And you weren't entirely sure if you meant hurting him with just your powers.
Tears crest and fall down your cheeks as you sit there, throat thickening. "I don't want to hurt Ben."
"He's a little more indestructible than us sweetie." She cracks a smile, but you can't smile back and you don't answer because you're unsure how to.
She sits back against the breakfast nook and sighs, examining your face and slowly realizes what you mean. "Ben is complicated. He always has been. I like to think that most of it, is his father's fault. Has he told you anything about him?"
You shake your head.
"He was a dick. Made Ben think that he was a disappointment his whole life. I don't think that Ben has had someone love him unconditionally since his mother died. And loving Countess only made it worse for him. Her love was jealous, possessive, and I don't think that he's really come to terms with what real love should look like." She lets out a breath, tapping her index finger against the glass. "I never saw him as more than a friend, but I do love him. It's not a crime to love him."
"I don't love him." You say it immediately.
"Why not?"
"What?" You sputter. "I don't know what you're-"
"Tell me why you don't love him." Your grandma says methodically, as if she's trying to talk you through it.
"Because I-" The pressure was back in the back of your throat and you couldn't quite meet her eye. "Because-" You scramble for the answer, trying your darndest to keep your heart from clenching in your chest. "I want what you and grandpa had, what Annie and Hughie have, and what my parents had. A strong relationship with someone who sees all my flaws, the little parts, and the darkness and still choses to fall in love with me anyway. I don't want just one night I want every night. I want something real and Ben has said countless times that he-"
"So you've talked about it with Ben?" She raises an eyebrow.
"Only because he kept trying to sleep with me and I told him that I didn't want to have sex with him." You reply exasperated.
"You don't?"
"Gran!"
"What? He's attractive."
"It doesn't matter. None of it does. Because Ben has said that he doesn't have relationships, that he doesn't care about feelings, or emotions." Saying the words that Ben had told you countless times made something inside begin to shrivel up and die. "And I do. And I don't want to manipulate him into being something he's not or force him into a relationship that's doomed from the beginning. Ben is Ben. He's not changing or-"
"He has." She interrupts.
"What?"
"The Ben I saw in your hospital room is not the one I knew." She says it so matter of fact that makes it hard to breathe. "And neither was the one that I saw in your apartment when I stayed with you. I mean he is in essence Ben, but-"
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"He is changing. Not completely, but he's acting differently than when he was with Countess. I mean, I saw all the things he did for her. The way he was around her."
"Why does that matter?"
"Because he loved her."
The words make your heart seize in your chest. "Ben doesn't love me. He's my roommate and my friend-" It was the same thing that you kept telling yourself on repeat to beat back the other feelings that you hadn't quite identified yet. "And he's told me that he doesn't want a relationship and that I should try to meet other people."
That last part was a lie, but you honestly didn't know where she was going with this conversation or why it was getting so hard to breathe.
"Have you thought that maybe Ben doesn't want to love you because he's scared?"
"He doesn't love me and Ben isn't afraid of anything."
"He is. It might not look the same way on him as it does on everyone else, but if you pay close enough attention you can catch it." She hesitates. "And I think if you pay attention to you, you'll see what it is that you're afraid of too."
What does she mean? What the hell am I afraid of? Ben isn't afraid of anything, he's practically shouted that from the mountaintops like Julie Andrews.
"I already told you what I'm afraid of."
"I'm not talking about you hurting someone honey. There's something else that you refuse to admit to yourself because you're scared." She smiles sadly at you. "You should though, because when you embrace it, what comes after is really beautiful." There's a far off look in her eyes and you realize that she'd seen something further ahead that she wasn't letting on.
"And it's all I want for you. To be happy." Your grandmother stands from the other side of the booth "I think you need some rest. You drove all night long and I doubt you got any sleep. And I have to package all of these before Annie's mother calls down the four horsemen of the Apocalypse on me."
"Wait-"
"Please sweetie." She lays her hand down on your arm. "I think you'll feel a little better about all of this when you've had some rest." Her fingers raise to push back some of the hair that's fallen forward into your eyes. "Hmm?"
You didn't want to rest, you wanted to talk about this, but you knew better than to argue with her. Not to mention she was right, you hadn't slept.
"And when you wake up I'll make your favorite for dinner, alright?" She smiles, but there's something behind it that you can't place.
"Okay."
And this time you don't argue with her. You go up the worn staircase that you have your entire life and collapse onto your bed, wondering exactly what it was she saw your future hold, and what it is that you won't admit to yourself.

Soldier Boy POV
There was no light in the apartment save from the burning red tip of Ben's blunt and the bluish glow emanating from the tv that caught the dips and sharp edges of his face. But it was nothing more than background noise.
His hand absentmindedly stroked along Bean's back, his eyes focused on the ceiling above the couch. He hadn't moved in hours. It had been over twenty four hours since everything that happened at the plant shop, since you'd summoned a creature from the depths of the store, since Darren had thrown Ben through the plate glass windows of the bakery, and since Ben had last seen you.
He didn't understand why you hadn't let him take you back to the apartment and why it was that you had to leave. Ben hadn't liked the feeling that stabbed him in the chest when you turned your back on him and ran away. He'd felt the urge to comfort you the way he'd watched Hughie do for Annie in the car a week ago, but you hadn't let him.
Instead all he'd done is stood there and watched you run, still covered in dust, rubble, and blood. Worse was you hadn't let him check you for injuries and Ben hated the thought that you were hurt somewhere and he didn't know where you were.
You were so much more fragile than he was. He was realizing that more every day, was acutely aware of it after everything that happened with Elijah. Honestly, sitting there in the hospital with you laying there asleep with nothing that he could do, but wait for you to wake up had been agony. Not to mention that looking at the bruises around your throat, over your eye, and the bright green cast only made him feel worse. He'd never felt so helpless in his entire life and he hated it. Because Ben wasn't some helpless damsel in distress, he was a man and a man shouldn't wait on anyone or feel out of control, or at least, that's what he told himself.
Ben hears someone walk down the hallway outside the apartment and he perks up to listen, hoping that it's you finally coming home. Ben's mind stutters on the word "home." He'd lived many places in his life, apartments that felt more like way-stations, and the drafty cold mansion back in Philadelphia where he grew up, but neither felt like home. And although he hated how small your apartment was, it was the first place that Ben liked living in. He was starting to understand the word home.
But the feet keep moving past the apartment and Ben sinks into the couch cushions. Even Bean seems to be disappointed. "It's alright buddy." Ben mutters. "She'll come back."
But he wasn't sure.
Ben also wasn't used to feeling this way. It was close to the way that he felt when he went to Boston and was sitting in that damn hotel room waiting for something to happen and he still didn't understand what it meant. He didn't understand why he couldn't stand it that you weren't back yet. It made him feel like a woman waiting for her husband to get home from work when he told her that he was "running late." He'd tried to distract himself by looking at some possible prospects on Tinder, but just like the week after you'd come home from the hospital and just like the date he had in Boston, no one held any appeal.
His mind was awake and roaming around, pacing back and forth. The blunt was supposed to help, but it hadn't.
His phone chirps and Ben picks it up to look at the screen, but it's not you, it's Jake.
Jake: I know that I'm not your favorite person, but thank you for what you did.
Ben huffs and turns his phone face down on the couch once more. "What a fucking pussy."
When you left Ben had realized that Jake was still inside the building and as much as he wanted race after you, he understood that you'd be even more upset if you'd killed Jake. So Ben had tromped back through the building and found him trapped beneath some rubble. Jake was okay, just unconscious, but Ben had carried him out and put him on the sidewalk before he high tailed it out of there. The last thing that he wanted was to be caught with a shredded body outside a ruined building.
I didn't do it for him. I did it for her. Ben thinks to himself, looking down at the text message.
As much as he hated the thought of saving your future boyfriend, he didn't want to see what it did to you if you found out that you killed Jake, so he'd done it to avoid watching you cry again.
Ben didn't understand why he hated watching you cry.
Women cry. They're damn emotional all the time. He tries to reason with himself taking a puff from the blunt pinched between his thumb and forefinger. And she fucking cries way too much.
The image of you crying outside of the shop in the wake of everything that happened pricks something under his ribcage. Fuck.
Ben didn't feel remorse for what happened, well, the only thing he regretted was not getting there sooner and getting to fuck Darren up himself. When Diana had called him to tell him that Darren was coming, Ben had practically ripped the apartment door off in his haste to get back to you. He hadn’t wanted to leave you at the plant shop, but Butcher had told Ben, that he had a possible location for Darren, but it came up empty and Ben had been at Butcher's apartment chewing him out for sending him on a fucking wild goose chase.
It only made Ben more angry to allow Darren to speak to you, but he was trying to let you handle it even though he wanted to handle him. But it had brought him an unholy amount of joy to throw Darren in front of that minivan and to watch that creature tear him apart while the final whitish blue pulses of electricity jumped and crackled down the street making the streetlights shower sparks everywhere.
But Ben was more upset that Darren had been able to land a few hits on you before you killed him.
Ben remembered the giant lizard that crawled out of what was left of "Please Don't Die" and felt his lips quirk up into a smile. As much as he hated the entire situation, Ben couldn't help but feel a little surge of pride at what you'd done to your brother. He'd never seen you look so powerful standing there in the street, your eyes glowing a brilliant green, arms outstretched, and the ground trembling around you as the world begged to be unleashed.
Of course he'd been just as surprised as you were at the fact that you'd healed your broken arm. He wasn't sure if you'd noticed it yet, but you looked different too. There weren't as many lines on your face and your hair was more springy, the few silver hairs that Ben had noticed in passing were no longer there.
He wasn't sure what that meant, but there was something that felt suspiciously like hope tingling in his stomach, hope that you weren't as fragile anymore and hope that it meant you wouldn't die.
When Diana had told Ben that her husband had died, he saw the pain in her eyes when she said it, saw her relieving the memory, and for some reason as soon as she said that he was dead, the first thing Ben thought about was you. Ben hadn't considered his inability to age as much in the past, hadn't cared about outliving anyone before. Seeing Countess as an older woman had made him more aware of it. Looking at the woman who he once thought he loved, had showed him what that was like. Not that he had a problem with daring older women, Ben always thought that women really did get better with age, but it was what came next that Ben wasn't fond of.
And for some reason thinking that one day he'd wake up and see the marks of age on your face or one day he'd wake up and he wouldn't be able to annoy you or hear you yell at him made his chest tight.
Ben takes another hit of his blunt. The longer he sat there the more then unnatural feeling stirred in the pit of his stomach, thrumming through his veins, the feeling that he was trying to avoid. He thought that the joint would calm him down, but he found himself jumping at every creak and footstep in the apartment building, perking up each time and hoping that it was you coming home.
He didn't know where you were. You hadn't answered any of his texts or calls and Ben was ashamed at how many times that he had tried to call you.
Get a fucking grip. He'd thought to himself when he typed out another text message to send you, stopping himself from sending it.
But he'd been so desperate to hear from you that he'd actually gone to talk to Annie who seemed upset that she couldn't get ahold of you either. When Hughie and Annie had seen how upset Ben had been, Hughie had laid his hand on Ben's arm and told him not to worry. Ben had yelled at him that he "wasn't fucking worried and to mind his own business" and had shaken off Hughie's comforting hand before stomping out of the shared apartment.
No one else seemed to be as concerned about finding you. Butcher, MM, and Frenchie were all deeply involved in trying to figure out the cover-up for what happened outside the plant shop. By some miracle no one had caught a picture of your face, but there was little they could do about Darren's body that had been strewn across the street. Annie was having to deal with the repercussions at work, trying to handle what the news was calling a "super villain threat."
Personally, Ben thought that since they froze Homelander, the Seven looked weak and Ben believed that the superhero team that represented America shouldn't look weak. Of course before Ben had also thought that they looked like a bunch of pussies and again felt himself sink deeper into the couch when he thought about what his supposed son had become.
He shakes off the feelings he has about it and his thoughts turn back inevitably to you.
Ben wasn't used to thinking about someone as much as he thought of you, but each time he settled back into the apartment and you weren't there he was hyperaware of how quiet it was.
Maybe I should call Diana. She might know where she is.
As soon as Ben thinks that, his phone begins to ring, but Ben doesn't bother to look at who it is before he answers it.
"Hello?" Ben huffs out a breath of smoke that hangs in the air in front of his face, catching in the bluish light coming from the television.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" The voice on the other side of the line yells at him.
"Di?"
"Yes it's me. Who did you think it was? Santa Clause?" Your grandmother snarks.
"Why are you calling me and why the fuck are you so mad? What did I do?" Ben answers slightly annoyed.
As much as you got under his skin, your grandmother had been the same way. He actually thought that it was amusing that even before he figured out that she was your grandmother that he had often compared you to her in his mind. You had the same mannerisms, the same defiant and stubborn attitude that drove Ben up the wall, and you were just as beautiful as she was.
Ben was okay with admitting that he was attracted to you. To him that felt normal, it was the other feelings that he was conflicted about, the ones that he'd never felt before stirring in his chest that made him feel "too emotional" and "woman-like."
Truthfully, Ben was sure that if your grandmother had given him a shot that maybe he would have felt that way about her too. She was the only person that Ben actually trusted in the 80's, the only person that was brave enough to call him out on all his shit. You did that now. But he liked her husband also, so Ben was content with letting her go. He liked how happy that Henry, your grandfather, had made her. He knew that she wasn't happy as a supe and seeing her so happy and in love made Ben feel something that was close to happiness.
And it was seeing the way the two of them were together made Ben wonder if what he had with Countess was the same thing. Because he did have feelings about her that were different, but each time he went to visit Diana and saw your father playing on her lap he felt that there was something missing in his life.
It was the same way that he thought something was missing when you weren't in the apartment, but Ben hadn't realized that yet.
"Because I don't understand what the hell you're doing!" Diana replies and Ben honestly doesn't know why she's angry with him.
"About what?"
"My granddaughter."
Ben sits up the blunt in his fingertips forgotten. "Is she there with you?"
"Yes." Her voice softens for a moment.
Ben relaxes and leans back onto the couch, sighing in relief. "Good. That's good." Relief swelled in his chest when he thought about you staying with her, safe.
That's what she meant when she said that she wanted to go home. Home is with her grandmother. Ben stopped the next thought before he could go there.
The thought that home wasn't with him.
Ben was trying not to think about that or think about you hating him. He didn't think you did, well, didn't think you did anymore. At first it really was touch and go, but now he was almost eighty percent sure after you'd told him more than once that you weren't afraid of him and didn’t hate him that you sometimes wanted him around.
"No, not good."
"What do you mean? Is she okay?" Ben's grip on the phone tightens so hard that he's sure that he hears the screen cracking.
"No."
"What happened?" Ben's voice is a growl, the feelings of relief evaporating as soon as they had begun to bloom in his chest. He mentally calculated how long it would take him to get to you.
"Her entire life fucking fell apart and where are you? Not here!"
Oh. Ben relaxed a little bit.
"I don't need to be there." He says on an exhale of smoke.
"Yes you do!" Diana presses.
"No, I don't. She a big girl she doesn't need me there, she's-" Ben takes a puff from the joint.
“If you were any denser you’d be a Bundt cake Benjamin!” She says exasperated.
"What the fuck are you talking about doll? I am not-"
“Let me guess." She interrupts and Ben can imagine her tapping her foot. He hated when she did that. "You’re moping around smoking a blunt on the couch probably with a glass of something that you're hoping to numb whatever the hell it is you're feeling."
Ben's eyes shift to the bottle of whiskey on the coffee table that he hadn't touched in a few minutes.
“I’m not fucking moping and stop spying on me!” He snaps back at Diana.
He hated how well she knew him. She was his best friend in the 80's through all the shit, she had seen him at his worst and at his best too many times to count.
“I don’t have to use my powers to know what you’re doing. I know you Ben.”
"Sorry to disappoint you sweetheart.” Ben grits his teeth, temper flaring hot. “But if you know me as well as you fucking say you do then you then you know that this is-“
“You avoiding your feelings by acting aloof and brooding like a fucked up version of Mr. Darcy.” She interrupts.
She certainly hasn't changed.
“I am not avoiding-“
“She needs you here Ben.” Diana stamps her foot, the same way you do when Ben pisses you off, and Ben can hear it.
“She doesn’t need me! She said that she wanted to go home, that she didn’t want to be here with me! I tried to-“ Ben shouts back standing up. It was the exact thing that he'd been thinking for the past twenty four hours, that you didn’t need him and that you didn't want to be any where near him.
That last thought made an uncomfortable sensation prickle in his gut when he thought it, because all it did was remind him of how you acted when the two of you first met, when you didn't want him to live with you and tried your darndest to make him go away.
He didn’t want to and he wasn't sure why that was.
“Try harder.” Diana interrupts him again and frankly it was pissing him off.
Ben clenches his jaw. “I think that you’ve confused me with someone else baby.”
“Don’t you 'baby' me Benjamin! We both know that you’re doing what you always do when things get hard for you.”
“And what’s that?”
“You pretend not to care and shut out everyone who tries to care for you. Not to mention you drown yourself in drugs, booze, and women.”
“She doesn’t care about me!” He spits.
“She does!” Diana snaps back. “And believe it or not she needs you here and she wants you here.”
"But-"
"Ben please." It was the first time that he'd heard Diana sound softer and almost pleading since the conversation started. "Don't do this to her. She's worth more than Countess and all those other women you've fallen into bed with."
"Do you really think I don't know that?" He roars. The answer surprises himself. "Do you think I don't know that she's different?"
Wait what?
"If you know that, then why aren't you here?"
He hesitates.
Everything you said to him the night of the party comes roaring back. You looking beautiful in a dress that made his throat tight, and you telling him that you just wanted to be friends and that you understood that he wasn't the type of guy to have relationships. He didn't understand why it stung a bit when you said that, but it had.
Ben thinks about the week that the two of you spent together after Diana went home, when he tried his best to take care of you, distract you from everything that happened with his movies, and would sit with you and try to make you laugh. He'd never wanted to take care of someone before.
Not to mention he kind of liked the way you laughed. He wouldn’t admit that to anyone, but each time you did, it made him want to laugh too. That had never happened to him before. But he wanted to make you laugh to forget everything that happened with Elijah. His fist clenches when he thinks of exactly what Elijah tried to do to you and it makes him feel so mad that he feels close to spontaneously combusting. Ben might not be the best role model when it came to women, but he couldn’t imagine the type of man who would force himself on someone else.
It had made him angry when he thought that you were suggesting that he would try something when he first moved in, because he wasn't that type of man.
Ben was trying to be better for you. He wasn't admitting that, but he really was trying to be better. He didn't understand why. You'd told him countless times that you didn’t want to be with him, that you wanted to be with someone else like Jake.
Ben frowns when he thinks about the man he'd pulled from the rubble of the shop. And again thinks to himself that you should be with someone different, someone who was a supe and could understand you. Ben had seen how difficult it was for Diana when she was keeping her supe life a secret from your grandfather and he didn't want you to have to do that with someone.
"Because I'm not-" Ben begins to say, but he holds his tongue. It was too honest, too raw, too unlike him to admit this to anyone.
Because I'm not this guy. Because I'm not the one she wants. Because I'm not some knight on a white horse. Because she's everything right with the world and I'm just a fucking asshole who sleeps on her couch.
"Ben." Diana breathes and he can practically hear her pinching the bridge of her nose. "In all the years I've known you, you've never done what you did for her with anyone else. You carried her out of that warehouse, you stayed with her in the hospital even after she woke up, you took care of her when she came home, you protected her from Darren. You can't ignore all those things."
"I'm not ignoring them. She's my friend." The word sours in his mouth as he says it. "And she would have done the same thing for me." He knew it was true.
She's a good person and she wouldn't let me chase her away if any of that shit happened to me and I told her to leave me alone.
"Yes she would. Because she cares about you." Diana sighs.
"She doesn't."
"Why don't you believe me?"
"Because she's told me what she wants!" Ben shouts so loudly he can feel the room shaking. "She wants to be friends-“
"Because she doesn't think that you want a relationship you nitwit!"
"I don't." Ben spits the words before he can stop them, but as he does something tightens at the base of his throat.
"How is it that it's been forty fucking years and you're still able to dance on the grave of my last nerve?"
Ben chuckles. "I missed you too sweetheart."
She sighs into the phone again making it crackle in Ben's ear. "She needs you.” Diana repeats. “And I think you need her too.”
His temper was flaring again, the thoughts that his father pressed into him surging up before he can stop the words. “I don’t need anyone. I’m Sol-“
“If you say that you’re Soldier Boy, I’m going to reach through this phone and slap you silly.” She snaps. “And you do need her, but you’re still just too stubborn to admit it.”
“I-“
“Ben I know that everything that happened with Countess was fucked up, but my granddaughter she-“ Diana pauses before she changes the thought. “You say that you know she’s different, but right now you’re treating her the same way you treat all those other women.”
“I’m not-“
“My granddaughter has decided you’re important to her and once that’s happened it’s hard to make her let go. You saw the way she was with Darren and that guy was a manipulative asshole. Imagine what she thinks of you.”
“I-“
“Stop making excuses!”
“You didn’t even hear what I was going to say!” Ben shouts.
“And I don’t need to! Think what you want Ben but if you’d stop acting so stubborn and so ridiculously blind to what’s right in front of you. I promise that what comes next is worth the risk.”
“Don’t go all fucking mystical on me doll.”
“And don’t go all macho- no feelings asshole on me! So stop being so damn stubborn, get on a plane and get your ass here.” She retorts. “Don’t fuck this up Benjamin because if you do I’ll fuck you up.”
The line goes dead.
Ben sat there for a minute in the silence still holding the phone up to his ear, listening to what your grandmother said to him ring around in his head for a second.
No one ever spoke to him that way. In fact, Ben had never allowed anyone to speak to him the way that she did, well, not until you came along. You reminded him so much of her that it was astounding and he wasn't going to admit that maybe it's why he liked being around you so much.
Ben frowns at what Diana said, thinking about the unusual feelings that were swirling in the pit of his stomach. He felt wrong and the feelings were odd for him. He hadn't felt anything remotely like this ever in his life, not even for Countess.
And although Ben refused to be afraid of anything, the feelings he was having scared him. He didn’t understand and he wasn't sure that he wanted to. He wasn't sure that he wanted to see where this ended up. He felt like he was in too deep.
As much as he wanted to go to you like Diana ordered him to, he wasn't sure that he should. Something was holding him back, digging it's heels in and refusing to budge.
But why do I feel like-
His phone rings and he doesn't look at the caller ID when he picks up, expecting it to be Diana again, yelling at him.
"Di I-"
But it's not Diana.
"Hello Ben. It's nice to hear your voice again." The familiar voice says, sounding calm and collected.
"What the fuck do you want?" Ben snarls.
"I thought it was time the two of us had a chat.”

A/N: At this point Diana is really just trying to give both Ben and the reader the kick in the pants they need. And yes I know another cliffhanger, but you know you love it. 🤭😉 We are quickly reaching the end of this series, but that means the confession scene is coming and I am so excited about it!!
As always thank you so much for reading! Reblogs, likes, and comments are not required, but are always appreciated. I love hearing what y'all think! If you'd like to be added to the taglist for this series let me know. 😊
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Bad Day
Peter Parker x Reader
kiss number...1
Peter was having a bad day.
summary: Baby boy drops a glass goes to pick it up and cuts his hand, he was already having a bad day so holding in a couple tears of pain and sheer frustration, babygirl comes running to the rescue, the cuts not so deep, babyboys just tired after patrol, baby girl cleans the cut and heals him with her healing powers.
A/N: anyways hope you love it, thxx for reading, love u, byeeee. xoxo. -N.
p.s. my requests are open my loves<333
tw: gun mention, my writing lol, wound mention, blood.
wc: 1652
Peter was having a bad day. Your dad had catched him sneaking in to your room one too many times, and ordered him to go to his own place and sleep there. The extra commute from Park avenue all the way to Queen’s, properly wore him out, sum that to the fact that this was probably the first time in weeks he didn’t sleep in your soft king bed, and plush pillows, in the cotton linen blend sheets that didn’t scratch his sensitive skin, as well as the slightly weighted cool cover and velvety blanket you slept with, the room to the perfect temperature, smelling like you, and the background noises you played he used to laugh at you for, and most importantly your warm inviting arms holding him and lulling him into a wonderful sleep, so the next morning when it was time to wake up and his alarm went off, he didn’t wake up, instead he overslept for almost an hour, rushed into the shower and out the place, and had to swing all the way because he remembered he had a quiz he couldn’t miss, a quiz he wonderfully failed, history is not his strong suit.
Wednesday, the day he only shared one class with you, but he couldn’t even catch up because the work partners where assigned and he wasn’t with you. Lunch time came around and of course he forgot his wallet with how in a rush he was, and of course today was the day you had different lunch times and you weren’t there to offer him to buy him lunch, which he usually refuses to anyway, but today he might of have made an exception. Near last period he went to his locker to take out the books he didn’t need to take home, he bent down to take multiple books out of the bag he had left on the floor, as it happens, when he came back up with full force, he hit his head with the edge of the locker door, naturally Flash saw the whole thing and decided to advertise it to the entire hall, making him the subject of everyone's amusement until the bell rung for everyone to scatter to their classes, you saw him from afar but before you could make your way to him he had already slammed the door closed and walked off to his own class.
Already feeling the weight of the world on his shoulders he decided to clear his head and go for patrol, on his way out of school he found five bucks perfectly crumpled in the pavement, for a moment he thought that finally the day was getting somewhat better, until he went to Delmar’s to get his usual and they added tomato slices to it, he didn’t know if he wanted to sob or gag. He was too hungry and had no choice but to fish them out. He had a long patrol of pretty much nothing, not a crime in sight, the frustration settling in him, once the sun had gone down he decided to give up and fuck did he really want to see you, unconcerned if Mr. Stark found him and threaten to take his suit away if he found Peter sneaking in his daughters room to put his sticky fingers all over her again. His patience was truly starting to be tested when a couple blocks away from finally getting to you there was a some assholes stealing a purse from an older woman, presumably walking home, he couldn’t ignore it even if he wanted to, nothing could’ve prepared him for one of the men to put a gun to the lady’s head threatening to shoot if he didn’t walk away, and as he was thinking his next step to handle this the other guy found a pole and hit him right in the back of the head, knocking him to the ground, the thieves left with the purse, the lady ran away screaming and he had to walk those few blocks with a throb in his head and what felt like a shot wound to his spirit, not feeling like he could swing anymore.
Your day was pretty regular, little lonely with almost no sight of Peter, regardless as the sun set you started to get ready for bed, quick shower, comfy pj’s, and currently working on the quickest dinner possible, putting some organic chicken nuggets and fries in your air fryer, when you heard the elevator ding.
“Is that you dad? Cuz I’m still mad that you kicked Peter out,” You said setting the temperature and timer for the food.
No answer just Peter walking in to the kitchen, slumped, mask in hand, tiered eyes, and a small thigh lip smile.
“Peter, hi,” You walked towards him, no idea what but something definitely was up, you wrapped your arms around him and he immediately melted into you, you swayed him softly in your arms until he felt like pulling away.
“You okay?” You asked cupping his face, he hummed and nodded his face, eyes closed, tiredly nuzzling into one of your palms.
“Are you hungry, baby? Why don’t you have a quick shower and we’ll do a little dinner in bed? Yeah?” You placed a tender kiss on his forehead, he nodded again, mumbled a quiet yeah, and walked himself to your bedroom, hoping this would be the turning point to his horrendous day.
Meanwhile you lined the air fryer with much more food, knowing Peter could build up and appetite, specially after a long day, then cut up some cucumber, and looked for some baby carrots, to at least get a veggie in. You had your plates all lined up, one for nuggets, one for fries, and one for some veggies and dipping sauces, Peter sneaked up behind you, wrapping his arms around your body, squeezing you gently.
“I’m gonna take these to bed, you think you can pour me a cold glass of something, hot stuff?” You said winking an eye at him and grabbing the plates, finally he let you see a more genuine smile, chuckling at the nickname you gave him, he gave you a nod as you walked away to your room. You set the plates in bed and walked back to the kitchen to get your boy and your little glass of dr pepper. Peter felt lighter being around you, no hesitation to turn around and go to your cupboards to grab you a glass, he grabbed two with one hand and as he turned around they clinked together, slipped, and dropped to the ground, the clatter and shattering sound of glass ringing though the place.
“Fuck!” Peter hollered out, hands slapping against his face as he groaned into them, exasperatedly defeated.
“Baby it’s okay, it’s just a glass,” You said, watching the scene play out as you walked into the kitchen.
“Leave it, I’ll pick it up,” He ignored you and bent down, clearly beyond worked up, face contorted in a frown strange for his features, reaching to pick up the shards.
“Bab-
“Fuck!” As he was picking up pieces and placing them in his other hand, he grabbed a little too hard and a shard dug right into his palm, making him drop the mess and drip blood all over it, “shitshitshit,” he said grabbing his wrist, feeling the heavy sting, not just in his palm but in his heart.
That was the final straw, he slumped back into the bottom cabinets of one of the kitchen islands, sobs wracking though him, the sight of him broke your heart, you hurried to his side, careful to not step on the glass, completely confused on how this had made him have such a reaction.
“Hey, baby…Peter,” You were knelt right at his side, and grabbed his hand, holding it carefully to the side and pulling his body into yours, he quietly sobbed into your shoulder, it took him a couple minutes to calm down to quiet sniffles, and eventually to sort of ragged breaths, in the meantime of that you rubbed a hand, up and down, through his back, the other rested his own injured hand on his side and went up to his hair, raking gentle fingers through, shushing him and whispering sweet nothings into his ear.
“Feel better, baby?” You pushed him away, and cupped his face, eyes closed, and a light flush.
“Mhm,” He blinked his teary eyes open.
“What happened?” You asked, lifting his face to look you in the eyes.
“Bad day… horrible honestly,” More than upset, he simply looked tired.
“Hmm…let me look at that,” Carefully, you lifted his hand, blood had dripped and dried, leaving a nasty sight of crusting darkened blood, “Let me clean it up, yeah?” He nodded softly and followed you to your bathroom, he hissed quietly at the warm water stream that hit his hand. With clean hands, you rubbed delicately around the cut, to soften and rinse off the dried blood around it. You sprayed antiseptic on the cut and on a cotton pad, then weakly wiped the cut.
“Does it hurt?” You said, lifting his hand to examine the cut.
“Stings a little,”
“This is gonna sting a little more, yeah?” He nodded, expecting the familiar touch, slowly you grazed your pointer finger over the cut, and both of you watched as the gash mended, you brought his hand closer and placed a velvety kiss to the middle of his palm, by the time you pulled away, there was no trace left of the cut. You intertwined your fingers with Peter’s and looked back up into his eyes, and leaned in to kiss his lips in the same manner.
“Better?” You kept your eyes closed and foreheads pressed. He squeezed your hand and chased your lips, he softly licked them and nodded his head.
“Yeah… yeah,”
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