#blithe hcs

[winterweary]

NSFWish headcanon!

Humans have a higher fertility rate than demons! In NB Diavolo stated that he didnt recognize MC (who was disguised as a demon) so that leads me to believe that there’s not tons of demons running around. There’s no way beings who live a millennia have a low population naturally otherwise! And while never outwardly spoken I’ve kinda assumed that ALL demons attend RAD, but there’s been no confirmation of this.

You casually mention that humans can get pregnant the first go and they’re all shocked! Tell ‘em humanity has a population in the billions, go on.

Thoughts?

POSITIVELY JUICY

Honestly it makes complete sense from a biological perspective. Species with longer life spans tend to have fewer offspring but invest more time in them. So it tracks that demons would spawn or procreate less often or with lesser success rates.

Also I have my personal head canons for how demons/angels are spawned that don’t necessarily depend on procreation.

WHICH MEANS

God the way their mouths water every time you ovulate.

Just the IDEA that once a month they could plant their seed in you.

That twelve times a year they have the chance to mount you and breed your warm, fertile human core together.

I imagine to demons sex is recreation and pleasure and not necessarily for procreation. So something about the risk, the animalistic drive, and the sweet open way you welcome them every time…

It drives them practically insane.

I feel like Mammon, Diavolo, Satan and Beel get off on the breeding in particular, the thought of siring their young in you.

For Lucifer, Barbatos, Belphegor and Asmodeus it’s the trust, the thought that you would welcome them no matter the consequences and even perhaps be proud.

Leviathan gets caught up in the wanting, the thought that you would even consider him worthy as a mate - it makes him dizzy.

[winterweary]

This is SO funny to think about.

My opinions:

Absolute Indignation. How DARE they even insinuate such a thing!: Lucifer, Satan, Simeon (but he hides it behind a chuckle and a cold smile)

Immediate Horror. Oh god what if you hear and BELIEVE them???: Mammon, Levi, Beelzebub

Laughs Until There Are Tears In Their Eyes. Them? With anyone but YOU? Absurd: Asmodeus, Belphegor, Solomon

No one would dare make such a false statement about Diavolo but if they did I think he’d find it terribly amusing.

It's not a trope, but there's this thing in fanfics where a pick me girl lies and says she's dating the reader's partner (not knowing the reader and partner are already dating yk), like:

"Yeah, S/O and I have been dating for months, but we're keeping it secret 🥰🩷✨🥰"

Meanwhile reader is like:

And I wanted to make something like this for the om! brothers, but I wasn't able to think of different reactions because each of them would be absolutely flabbergasted.

The audacity.

[etruatcaelum]

On Salem’s Religion.

Her practice is a highly syncretic form of Ruakhian polytheism (although it would also not be inaccurate to say that Ruakhian polytheism evolved from her practice).

The underlying cosmology imagines a tripartite cosmos: there are three primordial realms, one of water, one of fire, and one of earth, whose confluences give rise to the younger realms, Remnant among them. At the center—the soul of all things—is the place-that-is, which is also called the river or the forge.

(It is a key tenet of this belief system that there is only one soul, and it is fractal; some beings have smaller souls than others, but all are the same soul because they are self-similar parts of the soul, which is the place-that-is.)

The historical Ruakhian pantheon was arranged loosely into five houses: the gods of fire, of earth, of water, of the soul, and of the world. (Sometimes seven, with dark and light, but Salem does not hold to this view.) On top of this core, Salem has adopted many new gods over the centuries.

These are the major deities she worships:

Gods of the Soul.

These are not the rulers per se, but they’re the eldest of the gods and given special deference accordingly. As they dwell in the place-that-is, the gods of the soul are reached from within; offerings made to them are ritually consumed.

Lombe, the Artisan, is primarily a god of craft: spinning and weaving, pottery-making, wickerwork, metallurgy, musical instruments. Salem also regards her as a hearth-god.

Shrithe, the Walker, is a god of stillness and motion: he is associated with the winter and with way-finding. He is also the death-god of chief importance in the Ruakhian afterlife, as the dead rested with him and received his guidance before beginning the long ascent through the primordial realms back to the waking (living) world.

Kané, the Singer, is a god of secret knowledge, song, poetry, and the written word. Alone of the elder gods, it touches the waking world as the breath of life and wind that moves the stars; many of its rites pertain to augury and haruspicy.

Margh, the Sleeper, most enigmatic of the elders, is a god of magic, selfhood, memory, dreams, and emotion.

Gods of Water.

The realm of primordial water is called the Wending Sea. It is the lowest realm, flowing beneath the skin of the world—Salem locates her realm, the one formed by her semblance, in the Wending Sea. These gods receive libations of saltwater, blood, atrum, or dark wine, and all have associations with grimm.

Striga, the Witch of the Wilds, is a god of witchcraft and war, storms and wildfires, rot and rebirth. She is the herald of the moon-god and associated with bloodshed of all kinds, including childbirth. Salem has fully divorced her own worship from the historical identification of Striga as herself. But this is why her emblem is called the Sigillum Strigis.

Ictifex, the Night Wyrm, is a god of darkness and underground things: caverns and sinkholes and the like, but also worms and burrowing creatures. He is formed from the cast-off skin of the serpentine Shrithe, and his is the death of water. When the dead traverse the Wending Sea, Ictifex hunts for them, and if he finds them and bites them, they will return to the waking world as grimm.

There are eight minor gods of water; the eight most common grimm morphs of the Taiyin Steppe are named for them: Ursai the Bear, Matagot the Lion, Khorkhoi the Viper, Almasty the Ape, Tulpar the Wind-Horse, Corocotta the Hyena, and the winged dog Chamrosh.

Gods of Earth.

The realm of primordial earth is called the Garden of Thorns. Its position relative to the others is somewhat vague—historically, it was often placed below the Wending Sea, but Salem thinks of it as a sort of cosmic membrane: the skin of the world and the skin of the sky. Whether these gods receive libations or burnt offerings varies; the libations are mostly of wine or blood, the offerings mainly in the form of animal sacrifice.

Omadios, the Vulture, is a god of wild things and wild places, of the hunt, and of hunger. She is the wilderness; hers is the death of earth. If the dead rising from the Wending Sea are unmarked by Ictifex, she will call out to them, inviting them to join her revelries; should they choose to partake, they will return to the waking world as faunus. Ruakhian tradition held that your animal patron was the thing you ate in the Garden.

Shiqmá, the Shrike, is a god of herds and the slaughter—the domestic counterpart of Omadios, in a sense. She was sung into being by Kané, and shares its association with poetry and language.

Erlik, the Wolf, is a war-god and a god of wrath, vengeance, horsemanship, and destruction. He is a companion of Striga and the mountain-smith; earthquakes are the reverberations of his hammer, and volcanoes are his forge.

There are ten minor gods of earth: the Crow, the Sparrow, the Hawk, and the Pheasant; the Hare, the Ferret, the Horse, and the Fox; the Snake and the Spider.

Gods of Fire.

The realm of primordial fire is called the Wailing Sea. It is the uppermost realm, burning white and gold above the skin of the sky. These gods receive burnt offerings, primarily of herbs, flowers, or wood.

Mar, the Moon, is a god of truth, justice, atonement, oaths, and mourning. They are the creation or offspring or a dream of Margh, and theirs is the death of fire. When the dead climb up from the skin of the sky to travers the Wailing Sea, Mar sees them through the sundered gate—the maw of the broken moon—and, to those for whom they weep, they offer the secret of silver.

Caleb, the Sun-Holder, is a hearth-god and god of familial bonds and healing. The sun itself is a clay lantern shaped by Lombe, which holds the life-giving fire. Salem regards him as a god of plantings and the harvest as well—agriculture featured very little in Ruakhian culture, but she gardens.

Iskra, the Vermilion Witch, is a god of mirrors, firelight, aura, and falling stars. She is a companion of Striga, and something of a stricter counterpart to her: scorched earth to the wildfire, dust-conjured lightning to the thunderstorm.

There are twelve minor gods of fire, represented by the constellations of the ecliptic.

Gods of the World.

Remnant is the waking world, the land of the living, the place without. Most of its gods are small: spirits of a mountain or a river or a household, culture heroes, ancient grimm, tutelaries, and the like. The roster of Salem’s big gods hasn’t expanded very much—when she does adopt new deities as gods of water, earth, or fire, she more often approaches them as new aspects of her own gods—but she has, by now, literally thousands of small gods. Some of them are very small indeed. Those that follow are only the most important to her.

Samandar Khan was her son and the founder of Ruakh; he began to receive cult after his death. Salem doesn’t worship him exactly, but she keeps a shrine and practices his rituals as a way to, at least symbolically, keep him alive. She calls him Irem when she is feeling sentimental.

Sykites was the tutelary deity of Irem’s deme before their decimation and continued to be his patron and that of his family, Salem included.

Kultarinta the Bear is a culture hero of the Yslenic peoples of northwestern Sanus, a warrior variously attested as an ursine faunus or a shape-changing turnskin. (She was both: Salem taught her shapeshifting.) At the end of the Third Era, she killed Patricius Eternus, put the Circle, his fanatical cult, to the sword, and became the second summer maiden in the process. Worship of her as a bear-god persists into the modern day among the Yslena as well.

Valravne is the leviathan of the Evernight horde: an ancient nevermore as massive as the wyvern of Mountain Glenn. Grimm of such size are invariably hollowed out into living hives by their hordes, and they are to grimm hordes somewhat akin to what culture heroes are to people. All of them are very, very old. (Monstra, incidentally, was not a leviathan: Salem hauled the corpse of an actual dead whale out of the Tarth Sea, marinated it in an atrum reservoir for several months until the meat was all mostly grimmified, and then started sculpting. Monstra was a battleship.)

Vangtand, Knaggli, Náttfari, and Turibriga are four of the five tallest peaks in the world: Evernight perches on an escarpment between Náttfari and Knaggli, with Turibriga accessible through the pass to the north and Vangtand—the highest of all—piercing the sky beyond that. Salem’s horde nests in all four mountains and has excavated a vast labyrinth beneath (and pushing up into) these mountains; the peaks have become more or less equivalent to household gods—horde gods, as it were.

Balfyr is an important deity in the folk religion of the Vitrine Peninsula: a god of the ghastly ‘witchfire’ often seen at night in the marshes and bogs that dominate the region, traditionally held to be the lost souls of the newly-dead; Balfyr is a psychopomp who gathers these wandering spirits and guides them home. Salem has adopted them as a guardian of Alukah’s wetlands.

Tarth is the name of both the cold sea to the east of Alukah and the monstrous grimm that makes its home in the depths. Tarth is, by a wide margin, the biggest grimm in the the world: an eel-like behemoth massive enough to swallow an Atlesian dreadnought whole. Salem reveres her as a living manifestation of the sea and its dangers.

& On Belief and Realness.

Salem takes all of this very seriously. While she’s perfectly aware that little of it is accurate in the strict factual sense—and she’ll never shy away from factually discussing the Brother Gods and her ‘Elder Gods’ (which, being aspects of the Tree, do exist)—she feels it is all real in every way that matters.

Namely: she finds meaning and spiritual fulfillment in her beliefs, and her rituals work, and it feels true in some essential way that ancient worship of the God of Light (and Darkness, from a distance) didn’t. Ipso facto, it is true in some essential way that is deeper and more important than factual correctness.

Outside of contexts where factual accuracy is of crucial importance, i.e. recounting what the Brothers did and/or discussing Ozma’s mandate, she makes not the slightest distinction between gods who exist and gods who don’t. It does not matter to her.

She is going to start worshipping the spirits in the relics as soon as they’re freed and integrate the Ever After and the Tree into her cosmology, as parts of the Garden of Thorns, once she learns about them. None of this remotely fazes her; she merely slots new information or new gods wherever they fit best into her existing belief system.

Her actual praxis is exactingly methodical and constructed around reciprocity—do ut des. The purpose of every act of propitiation, every prayer, every vow, and every ritual is to either receive something in return or repay a favor in kind. Broadly speaking, her rituals do work even when her gods do not actually exist because she’s had thousands upon thousands of years to figure out how to make things happen, whether by creating the conditions that will cause it or by magic; that knowledge undergirds her religious praxis.

(Salem’s absolute disdain for the God of Light is less a response to his cruelty in and of itself than it is his violation of that reciprocity, not by refusing but by brutally punishing her for asking at all; likewise, although her feelings about him are complicated, she made her peace with what Darkness did to her long ago and began to worship him in memoriam because he did act reciprocally before his brother intervened.)

[lookingforhappy]

dumb little hc incoming

the Hargreeves all had "individual training days" in which they honed their powers one-to-one with Reginald.

there are 7 Hargreeves. there are 7 days of the week. there is a rhyme that goes along with said days of the week.

Luther = every Monday = Monday's child is fair of face.

Diego = every Tuesday = Tuesday's child is full of grace.

Allison = every Wednesday = Wednesday's child is full of woe.

Klaus = every Thursday = Thursday's child has far to go.

Five = every Friday = Friday's child is loving & giving.

Ben = every Saturday = Saturday's child works hard for his living.

Viktor = every Sunday = And the child that is born on the Sabbath day is bonny and blithe and good and gay.

make of this what you will.

[creepy-spooghetti]

Heya dear fella! ^^

I was wondering... What about some platonic Hcs for BEN, Jeff, Helen and Toby (Sepparetly) with an early teen fem!reader (like 12-13 years old)?

Like- The reader is just this sweet, kind, caring child who is always trying her best to make people happy always with a smile on her face and make sure their okay (that goes for physical and mental) but is always the one everyone forgets about, the one that's always left out, the one that always fades into the oblivion.

And so one night (at likely 2 am) the creep in question just finds her sitting on the sofa and he, kinda shocked, asks her "hey, you 'kay?"

And then the reader just looks at him with a confused expresion until she starts crying and shaking her head no while saying "I never was!"

This is my kinda prompt :D

Thank you for requesting!!

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

BEN

In all honesty, this dude can be pretty oblivious to what's going on around him, especially when it comes down to peoples' feelings. So he genuinely took your blitheful front at face value and assumed you were alright! How could you not be? You seemed so happy all the time!

However, these false conclusions came crumbling down when he spotted you alone in the living room, sporting a blank expression as you stared at what was seemingly nothing. It was a concerning sight, to say the least. So he laid down the food he'd just raided from the refrigerator and walked closer, waving a hand in front of your face.

"Uhh...Y/n? A-are you, like...okay?"

The response he got was certainly not one he was expecting, and it took him greatly off-guard. He was not good at dealing with this sorta stuff, and the way his body stiffened significantly was proof enough of that.

Still, he wasn't about to leave. That would just be immoral. So he took a seat on the coffee table in front of you and tilted his head, letting you ramble on about how no one seemed to care about you even though you made it your #1 goal to ensure everyone else felt heard and accounted for. He held his hand up to halt your words and offered a sincere grin. "Hold up, hold up. I care about you. That counts for something, right?"

Jeff

He figured after seeing you around for a while that something had to be up with you. After all, nobody can be that happy 24/7. But you had never made any effort to signify that you wanted someone to acknowledge the potential struggles you had, so he kinda just shrugged it off with the thought, "if she needed comfort or something, she'd go to someone about it".

This theory of his backfired when he saw you looking so lost and saddened on the sofa, and it honestly startled him; what could have happened that made you so...gloomy? He had just returned from a mission, so his hoodie was coated with patches of fresh blood and his hair was messy, but he figured taking a shower could wait.

Hesitantly, he approached, raising a worried brow. "Y/n, hey. You good?" The glance that he received for that question made his stomach tense, and before he could really process it, you just started to cry, burying your face in your hands and explaining through tears how you felt ignored and insignificant. He blinked in confusion but sat down beside you nonetheless, resting his arms on his knees and leaning forward to get a look at your expression. His voice softened a bit.

"...Has this been happening for a while?" When you nodded, he huffed in contemplation, placing a hand on your shoulder. "Ya know, if you wanted help, you could've just asked. I know this place is chaotic, but bearing a burden like this alone is just not ideal. You gotta let people know how you feel. Otherwise they'll probably never catch on. They're all idiots."

You sniffled, and he gently patted your back, lacing a lighter tone into his words. "Feel free to come to me, okay? I know I can be an asshole but I promise I won't give you a hard time about it."

Helen

Like Ben, he's a bit unaware of what people are feeling, but only because he's always so lost in thought. From the way you carried yourself all the time, he was almost jealous of you. Why couldn't he be that content with his life? What was he doing wrong to prevent that?

He just kinda shut down for a few seconds when he noticed you on the couch, appearing solemn. What was he supposed to do? He's not a 'people person' by any means, and even so, the two of you were never very close. Then he thought back to that time he was being tormented by Johnny and you stood up for him, and a decision was made.

Hesitantly, he willed himself to walk over and sit a couple of feet away from you, staring at the floor and speaking in a low voice. "Are you...alright?"

"No. I haven't been. Not for a long time." It was difficult to comprehend, as you had never once acted miserable in the past, but here he was, and here you were, experiencing it. He listened unsurely to your venting without interruption, and when you tapered into a sob-brimmed silence, he took it as his cue to - albeit reluctantly - place a hand on your upper back and provide words of attempted consolation.

"...Sorry you've had to deal with that. If you want to...you can come up to my room and we can sketch or something? I have some extra supplies you can use. Just to...get your mind off of everything."

Toby

Toby is no stranger to feeling lonely or disregarded, except he never purposefully convinced people that he was 'okay'. He knew that you weren't what you seemed, however, and though he never attempted to further confirm this (he has his own troubles to worry about, after all), he still watched closely on occasion, as he's a naturally observant person.

Seeing you on the couch in the middle of the night rose questions within him, and he didn't put much thought behind the matter before stepping over and speaking with a muted voice. "What's wrong with you?"

"Everything," is what you mumbled after several moments, and he leaned away in mild alarm when you started crying. This was certainly a concerning thing to witness. Still, instinct kicked in, and he sat down close by your side, brushing some hair out of your face.

He didn't say anything, as he was never very skilled with verbal comfort, but when he realized that your emotional breakdown might last a while, he wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you into him, expecting to be pushed away, but you only reciprocated.

And like that, you stayed, until you settled down enough to uphold a conversation. Then he opened his mouth. "Hey... Jane and I are getting together tomorrow to play chess. Wanna join us?"

[amorgansgal]

Wrote a little something for me mostly! I get to be indulgent because it's almost my birthday! As Vanya is my beloved, oblivious druid I've always hc that it was actually the whole gang who had to point out she was pregnant before she caught wind of it herself, so with Astarion at the end saying she was glowing and Shadowheart basically said she was fat, my little fanfic heart got excited!

Halsin x Female Tav (Vanya)

CW: Pregnancy, references to signs and symptoms of pregnancy, alcohol consumption

‘So,’ Shadowheart sauntered over to Astarion and leaned her head close to the man. ‘I’ve heard tell you were a little more subtle than I, you said Vanya was glowing!’

‘I did. Why, what did you say?’

‘I may have said she was a little more… solid.’

Astarion almost guffawed with laughter. ‘You called the woman fat! Shadowheart, where is your grace and decorum?’

Shadowheart rolled her eyes and took another sip of the wine from the goblet she was holding. They both watched Vanya excitedly chit chat with everyone, she was currently in animated discussion with Gale and Karlach. Not much had changed and Shadowheart let out a soft, contented sigh. It was nice to see everyone, even if she had rather put her foot in it. Though she was surprised Vanya hadn’t immediately told everyone the good news.

‘Wait…’ she said and Astarion quirked a brow. ‘You don’t think… Do you think she doesn’t know?’

‘She’s a druid, isn’t all natural life sacred and important? Surely, she would be able to tell immediately.’

‘Well… Vanya can be…’ Shadowheart gestured with the wine goblet.

‘Vanya can be Vanya,’ Astarion finished for her and she gave a rueful shrug and half nod. Granted, she was one of the heroes of Baldur's Gate and granted she was a powerful druid, but Vanya could also be blithely unaware at times. Sometimes he wondered how they managed to survive and why they had all seemingly chosen her as their leader, given she had a propensity for charging into situations without forethought and relied often on blind luck and relentless optimism! She had been exhausting at the best of times, but Astarion would be lying if he ever said he wasn’t fond of her.

‘Do you think Halsin knows?’ Shadowheart asked.

‘Oh, surely, he must do! That bear nose of his must be able to tell when she is… most fertile as it were, he must’ve noticed that her courses have stopped. Is Halsin just waiting for her to figure it out or is he just-?’

‘Waiting for who to figure out what?’ Halsin’s warm baritone rumbled behind them, they both jumped and then turned around, looking rather sheepish.

‘Uh… nothing!’ Shadowheart said quickly.

Astarion sighed, she’d been much better at lying when she followed Shar. ‘We were both just commenting on some changes we’ve noted in Vanya,’ he said, waiting to see if the elf would confirm their suspicions or question them further. Halsin’s eyes twinkled in merriment and he looked over their heads at Vanya, as she smiled and gave Karlach a very happy hug.

‘I have noticed changes in her, but I think she has dismissed them. She told me first of a stomach complaint and when I lay my hands there I knew what actually ailed her. She no longer likes the taste of fish - a shame to me, but one I can live with as long as I can still hunt for boar and deer with her - and yes, her scent changes with the waxing and waning of the moon, but she has only missed two courses. I am waiting for her to realise and to tell me the news,’ Halsin said.

‘Oh! Can’t you just tell her now, Karlach would be so thrilled and Gale too, Wyll as well I’m sure…?’ Shadowheart said.

‘Nay, she will realise it in due course and we will have another excuse to meet again and celebrate.’

‘Spoilsport!’ Astarion muttered, but gave Halsin a smile. ‘Congratulations to you both.’

‘Thank you,’ Halsin replied. ‘But don’t forget to look surprised when we tell you again, in a month’s time or so.’

‘Although,’ Shadowheart mused as Gale and Vanya made their way over to the feast laden table. ‘You may wish to say something, given that there are several bottles of plum fizz on the table and Vanya is partial to that.’

‘Ah…’ Halsin said, watching Vanya’s as she eagerly picked up one of the bottles and read the label. ‘A point well made, good evening to you both,’ and with that he quickly strode over to Vanya.

‘I have a feeling we might have a revelation by the end of the evening, if Halsin does tell her. Gods knows Vanya can’t keep something like that to herself!’ Astarion said and Shadowheart laughed softly. It was good to be amongst friends again.

[morgaknight]

Rolan HC's (soft family and tiefling stuff)

-Rolan is 3 years older than Cal and Lia

-Cal and Lia are twins (Lia is 2 minutes older)

-Rolan was dropped off at an orphanage at birth. He was swaddled in nice blankets, and it was assumed his mother was likely a non-tiefling from a noble family, and did not want to be saddled down with a tiefling child. (whether his father was a fellow tiefling, a cambion, or some other brand of fiend is unknown)

-It's often joke that all tieflings are "kin" in the eyes of non-tiefs, and that everyone assumes all tieflings are related... but when a 6 year old Cal and Lia saw a 9 year old Rolan... they really did think that he was kin.

-Cal and Lia grew up with their mom in a tiefling community, but it was mainly mephistopheles tiefs, so when there was another red skinned, black horned, and yellow eyed tief, they instantly gravitated towards him and the next several hours Rolan spent playing with kids that didn't look down on him.

-When Cal and Lia heard their mom calling for them to come home because dinner was ready, they were confused why Rolan wasn't coming along too. They had to drag him. Rolan: YOUR mom isn't MY MOM. Lia: How do you know? You said you don't know your mom! Maybe she is! Rolan: Because MY mom was a noble woman. Cal: Okay but if Mom ISN'T your mom.... maybe she knows your mom. Mom knows everyone. -With the whisper of maybe finding his family, and the promise of dinner... Rolan was convinced to come along.

-Cal and Lia's poor mother. Lia had a habit of never meeting a stranger, and Cal had a habit of bringing any wayward strays... but she tried to hide her surprise when her children came home with an orphan...

-Rolan was pretty mature for his age, and was embarrassed when the young woman tried to politely hide her surprise at her children's blithe immaturity and excitement. Mom: Okay okay, well you can tell me all about this after you've washed up and sat down at the table. Rolan backs out of the doorway as Cal and Lia run in to wash up. He felt so foolish. His heart ached watching them sprint away from him. He swore to himself to never pass through this neighborhood again while walking back from the library. Mom: You're not hungry, Rolan? Do you have a curfew? Rolan: Uhm, Harvark's doesn't care where we are as long as we're there for roll call in the morning. She recognized the name of the orphanage. Noticed his embarrassment. Mom: Well, I made far too much stew today so you'd be doing me a favor by helping us eat it. So come in, wash up, and have a seat at the table before it gets cold! -They sat at the table and for the first time in Rolan's life, he ate dinner with a family. -The only time he went back to the orphanage was the next morning (before roll call!) when Mom interviewed (aka paid) to adopt him. Lia: I TOLD YOU Mom was your mom! I was right!

-Sometime after his official adoption, angsty Rolan got into a fight with Lia and screamed that he wasn't really their brother, or a part of this family.

-which made Cal cry (Cal still is the crybaby)

-Mom explained to him that though they aren't blood-related, they *are* a family. That someday there might be a time where family was all the three of them had. -Mom got sick when Rolan was 16. It was a long sickness that slowly took her life over the course of 2 years. -On her deathbed, as a final request. She asked that Rolan Look after his brother and sister. Stick together and look out for each other.

-Rolan is thankful Mom passed long before Elturel fell into Averus.

[tumblingxelian]

I’ve made it clear I hate those HCs that have Jason struggling with science, technology or basically anything intellectual given the varying shades of classism and character assassination going on.

I do however think it would be very funny for him to see which characters are dumb enough to fall for such a ruse.

People who don’t fall for it, least to most:

Cassandra can tell when people are lying and doesn’t like or trust Jason and is newer to this stuff than him in some cases. She’d probably punch him if he tried it and so he doesn't. 

Stephanie and Jason have a pretty decent regard for one another and Stephanie doesn’t trust faux male incompetency like that given her dad. So her response would be, some variation of “Perish/Don’t fuck with me.”

Dick is the next least likely, he rarely doubted Jason’s intelligence, just his intent and they have that whole annoying sibling thing going on. So it’d be like, “I’m not falling for this Jason.”

Duke and Jason have a good relationship, Jason even mentored Duke a little so there’s respect. Duke’s better nature/relationship is the only thing that slots him into fourth place with, “You can’t? Wait a second, no, not falling for this.”

Barbara is last on the list, she tutored Jason, but did have a mixed memory of him and can have a bit of an ego at times and so assume the worst. It’d basically be, “You’ve got to be shitting me, all right I’ll... Wait, you are shitting me.”

Note: Babsgirl would 100% fall for it, unlike Oracle.

People who fall for it the most, least to most:

Damian doesn’t think highly of Jason but he does think highly of his mother who mentored Jason, but also thinks highly of himself. He’d fall for it for longer than you’d expect, give up ‘helping/ in frustrating only to realize when rooting around in the fridge that Jason was screwing with him.

Bruce’s memory of Jason is wildly inaccurate, but he can also often default to assuming the worst and doesn’t always trust Jason. Still, his mixed memories and complicated dad feels would ensure he sticks out trying to ‘teach’ Jason something very basic for a long ass time and then he’d be left doubting whether it was necessary.

Tim has near zero respect for Jason and loves being ‘right’ and ‘the smart one’. As a result it would only be his dislike of Jason that would eventually, after anywhere from days to weeks before he realizes Jason was fucking with him. If someone told him however he’d double down on assuming Jason can’t do it cos he can’t have been fooled.

Alfred would just do the task and blithely assume incompetence, or get someone else to do it and blithely assume incompetence and not really think on it more deeply than that, its the only reason he’s below Tim.

[desultory-novice]

So is Marx basically the Spinel to Kirby’s Pink Diamond?

First, anon, thought I would let you know I've gotten all (?) your asks! They're all quite good/quite inspiring. I love some Marx and Magolor (and Kirby) food! Especially after all this time ! >w<

The reason I haven't answered any yet is because they take time and focus and I want to let myself cook, so I can come up with some truly meaty answers for them. But alas, though I draw fast, I don't draw THAT fast XD (Plus, my brain's still stuck on campaigning hard for my failboy...!)

...But this one is easy enough to answer because O~H YESSS.

I mean, not that Kirby has a whole lot of Pink Diamond traits (or Steven traits, even?! My HC Kirby is like a weird mixture of The Little Prince from Le Petit Prince and The Unicorn from The Last Unicorn. Young yet old. Innocent yet wise. ...With a third thing mixed in that I haven't quite decided on yet but I feel I will know when I see it.)

However, Marx and Kirby's relationship (from Marx's POV at least) absolutely has this undercurrent of, "...I thought we had fun... I thought we were each other's bestest friends. But you... When the day was over, you just blithely abandoned me to a nightmarish fate and didn't even CONSIDER what effect that would have on me as you did?! You never came back to check on me! Not even ONCE!!"

"...Okay, sure! 🩷 If that's how we're going to play...LET'S PLAY!"

[bestworstcase]

Idk how much of Summer we are getting next week so *puts on tin hat* idk if anyone has asked before but assuming the team matchups work the same way who do you think on team strq became partners first?

Like Qrow and Raven and then Summer and Tai, that kinda matchup. (This is also my HC / prediction bc Raven’s you sound just like your mother is giving V1 Weiss annoyed at her partner vibes)

no more tin hats we aren’t in kansas anymore. lost fable 2: the summering IMMINENT ruby meets salem through her mothers eyes NEXT WEEK. VERY SOON. ALMOST TIME. summer rose is not haunting the story the story has been “sometimes i can still hear her voice”-ing her for Ten Years and she has found. an airhorn.

headcanons:

summer + raven. tai + qrow. the kid with the bad luck semblance he can’t control did NOT manage to pair up with his sister during the initiation, that’s for damn sure. 50/50 the two pairs did not cross paths even once and solely ended up on the same team bc summer and tai let the twins pick the relics and both of them went for the edgiest one they could reach. (it’s about the symbolism. team strq stretched and splintered and tore itself apart.)

i imagine raven and summer actually got on quite well until ozpin made the shy one with the silver eyes the team leader. not in the same way as weiss, though—raven is actually a capable leader, this is evident in her handling of the bandits under her command, and if summer was kind of a pyrrha situation (under-socialized prodigy) and couldn’t rise to the task of leadership the way ruby did, well. that’s a slow boiling kind of tension.

conversely i think qrow and tai probably didn’t sour into their present day simmering unspoken resentments vibe until after summer Disappeared and qrow turned out to like. not have a problem treating ruby like the spare while taiyang got delicately frozen out of the inner circle on account of all the depression and not blithely It Was Her Choice’ing himself back to normal hgmndh

[winterweary]

Obey Me Brothers - Most Shameful Kink HC’s

What kinks do the boys keep locked up extra tight?

Sailors Beware…dead dove do not read if you’re going to clutch your pearls thx

Lucifer - Shibaru/Robe Bondage on him

Lucifer is perfectly happy to be all dom all the time, and he loves tying you up. But deep down in his naughtiest dreams he’s burning up at the thought of you standing over him, the silk ropes against his skin, being at the mercy of your small, soft hands…Something about being restrained by someone as fragile and gentle as you keeps him up at night. He’d never suggest it but if you did? Oh, there would be clear signs of his pleasure. He might even let you gag him so all you can hear are his pants and groans as you take your time with him.

Mammon - Pegging

Look. He can explain, okay? Having your hand on the back of his neck, pressing his face into the sheets? Or squeezing his hips as you hold his thighs open and fuck him? Mammon wants to be a sloppy mess only for you, and giving you total command like this will have him cumming more than once. The sight of you strapped up alone is enough to have him panting like a dog.

Speaking of dogs, if you’re a lover who already has a dick? Pet play. Put a collar on him and let him be your good boy. Make sure you praise him lots and he’ll do whatever his master commands.

Leviathan - Choking

Sex between you two already gets plenty kinky between roleplaying and gender play, but what really makes Levi explode is the idea of your warm hands wrapped around his throat squeezing. He wants to be utterly at your mercy, just a dirty toy you’re using to cum, bruising your thighs with his fingers as you ride him. Spit in his mouth and degrade him while choking him and he’ll be seeing stars. The soothing aftercare makes the abuse feel all the better and the peeks in the mirror of the bruises give him thrills all day long.

Satan - Public Sex

Satan is a stickler for rules and takes reputation and decorum seriously…which is why the thought of you getting so worked up you just have to take him in the back of the library makes him burn. Oral in alleys, fucking under your skirt in an almost empty movie theater…Satan hates that he loves it but god does he love it. You almost wouldn’t know, with the effort he makes to resist the temptation, but letting you get him more and more worked up until he can’t help himself any longer is part of the fun.

Asmodeus - Cuckholding

There is very little that doesn’t get Asmo’s fire going, and less that he wouldn’t tell you about. Even this he’s not exactly ashamed of…it’s just a little off brand for him. Of course, he’s not going to be satisfied by watching you get fucked by just anybody. Oh no. Asmo wants to watch you get cock drunk destroyed by at least two demons, if not more. He wants to be able to get a perfect view of every single orgasm they pound out of you, and draping over an armchair, sipping champagne and watching the show is the perfect way to do that. The idea that he’s not allowed to touch you, and you’re not allowed to touch him, makes him even hotter, so plan to spend the next morning reliving every detail with him rutting inside of (or riding) you (in between godly pampering sessions of course).

Beelzebub - Sleep Sex

This is more expected from his twin, and it makes Beel red to talk about, but…sometimes when he gets back to bed after a late night snack, and you’re laying there so warm, and vulnerable, and innocent looking…well, just a few licks can’t hurt right? If you’re already naked it’s even harder to resist hilting his thick cock inside of you, doing his best to move slowly and not let his moans wake you. It’s never long before he can’t help himself however, and you’ve been awoken by mind blowing orgasms more than once, pinned to the bed by his body with his moans in your ear.

Belphagor - Travel vibrators/orgasm denial

Belphie’s maintains he’s not a sadist like some demons he could mention, but he is a brat, and he loves torturing you. He wants to watch you squirming all day, before turning up the heat during a council meeting or one of Lucifer’s lectures. No matter how good you think you get at hiding your arousal, he can always tell, and knows how to keep you just on the cusp of orgasming. He wants you dripping wet and begging by the time he gets you home and finally let’s you cum around his cock. And if you turn the tables and take a turn keeping him riding the edge for too long? You’ll get to hear some of the dirtiest words he knows as he whines and pleads.

[alagaesia-headcanons]

Hi! I just wanted to say it's been really cool to see the amount of effort and thought you're putting into Clear Horizons. In response to your recent post looking for inspiration, I thought up a couple of prompt ideas (possibly loose outlines - sorry if this is the wrong level of detail) for short fics with Murtagh and Orrin that I'm happy to share. I'm not sure that they're drabble length, but still, I hope these can be useful to you.

1. It might be fun to see the two of them have a conversation where they trade stories related to their interests. I'm picturing something like "I was investigating [sparsely documented scientific process] and while my experiments were successful it turned out way different from what I'd hoped" "wow that's wild I was investigating [obscure magical rumor/curse somewhere in the countryside] and while I solved the mystery things turned out way different from what I'd expected", but obviously you can play it however you like.

2. I personally hc that Murtagh really loves camping. I also suspect that Orrin doesn't have much experience camping, at least not so far off the beaten path without servants or knights for support. I think it would be cool to see a conversation from their first time out camping together - it could be fun to explore the reasons behind the camping trip, or how they reconcile their differing levels of experience, or the trust required to rest well all alone in the wild, or what it's like to be away from prying eyes for a bit, or the different things they associate with the activity of camping, or anything else you might find interesting about the situation.

No worries if neither of these speak to you, but hopefully this helps! Feel free to shoot me a message about it if you'd like. Best of luck to you. :)

Thank you so much for the lovely encouragement and the lovely prompts!! I've written for the first one here! The second one actually feels perfect for an idea I have near the end of Clear Horizons, so I may use it as inspiration for that 👀...

(All this writing has been an interesting look at the kinds of world building details I never would have thought about that I end up needing to decide. This time, I've decided the other planets in their solar system are all named after gems~)

-

The peace of the empty room is almost jarring after the long, crowded feast. “Now that we have a quiet moment to ourselves...” Murtagh drifts over to his bag. He deliberately waited for just such an opportunity to have Orrin’s full attention and also an unobstructed view of his reaction. “I have something for you.”

Orrin makes a grieved little noise, insisting, “Murtagh! You didn’t need to do anything like that; it’s too much. Having you here is a gift in itself.”

“Well, thank you,” Murtagh replies, pleased. “But! You’re wrong- It is imperative that I give you the best present that you’ll love so much, everyone else’s will pale in comparison.”

“Ahh, so it’s part of your peacocking.”

“Yes. Don’t peek!” Orrin holds his hands up and sits back in his chair. “That’s cheating.” Diligently keeping his back to Orrin so that he can’t see, he leans down and extracts a carefully wrapped up bundle from his pack. Hefting it up in his arms, he wrangles away the thick cloth protecting the large, leather bound book beneath. Sidling closer to Orrin under his curious gaze, Murtagh finally turns and hums blithely while he slides the book from his arms onto the table.

The moment the title comes fully into view, Orrin slaps a hand over the cover. “Holge’s Treatise on Natural Phenomena?!” Murtagh straightens up as he deposits the book and preens- just a little. “You can’t be serious-! I’d all but given up hope of learning of a copy, much less owning... When was this penned?” With immense eagerness measured by the caution of someone who both reveres books and handles rare texts on the regular, he thumbs through the introduction. “Where in the world did you get this?” he gasps in awe as he turns to the first chapter.

“In Ceunon,” Murtagh answers, but then pauses without elaborating. As he expected, Orrin’s eyes have zeroed in on the page, scanning it rapidly, and he won’t hear a thing he says until his focus relents again. Smiling softly, Murtagh waits patiently as he reads, silently counting out the beats of time.

Predictably, when he reaches forty, Orrin stirs and then says, “...Ceunon? Not Ilirea?”

“I didn’t look in Ilirea. It’s possible there’s a copy in the old citadel, but I’m not so sure. Besides, it’s your birthday: that deserves thought and effort. I wasn’t going to settle for the easy pickings by just rummaging around in there and swiping whatever seemed suitable.” Then Murtagh pauses and tilts his head.

“Just don’t ask how I got the money to-”

“So where’d you find money for such-”

Both cutting off simultaneously, Murtagh glowers at Orrin’s warm laugh. He sniffs primly and declares, “Someone might as well put Galbatorix’s hoarded wealth to good use, considering that he never did.” Orrin’s sound of agreement still wavers with a hint of laughter and Murtagh rolls his eyes fondly. “And it’s not as though that made it any easier to find the book. A librarian in Narda tipped me off, then when I searched out the collector I was directed to, I learned he didn’t actually have it, so he eventually told me who he thought should- then repeat that about five times over. Then I spent no less than three hours vowing to treat the book better than my first born child to convince the man to take my money once I finally found it.”

“I can’t say I’m surprised.” He flips to a page filled with equations. “Because it’s so specialized, it requires an expert to make a verifiably accurate copy, so very few exist. I still can barely believe it...”

“I hope it is accurate. I’m certainly not smart enough to know. Although I did read the chapter on astronomy while I travelled.”

“Astronomy?” he echoes in surprise. “I didn’t know he wrote about that. I’ve only heard him mentioned for his study of elements in nature.”

Nodding towards the book, Murtagh says, “The bulk of it seems to be about that. Hopefully that holds up better than his foray into astronomy.” Orrin glances at him and Murtagh confesses, “I thought most of it was bullshit.”

“Oh?” He rests the edge of his jaw in his palm.

Murtagh shrugs. “Well, I’ve spent a lot of time a lot closer to the stars than almost anyone else can reach, and I’ve inevitably noticed things.”

Orrin grins. “I’m not sure proximity determines your authority on astronomy.”

“It makes a difference though! You don’t realize just how much more I can see up there. Looking the other way is the most obvious proof of it. The sky can look perfectly clear, but once we’re up high enough, the ground below looks hazy and blurred and veiled. All of that is in the way of the heavens when you’re on the ground.” Orrin shifts his chair so he can lean in towards Murtagh, distractedly trying to find the chapter in question. “I don’t believe his argument about the moon and its implications about the arrangement of orbits. He assumes too much- other planets do have moons. I’ve seen them!”

Orrin abandons the book and latches onto that with full fascination.

“Thorn is best at tracking all the stars and planets; he always knows where the Opal is. They can’t be seen from the ground, but with a spyglass up there, I can see two moons around it. First, I figured they might be distant stars, but I know they’re moons.”

“Because they move?” Orrin infers, excitement in his breath.

“Exactly! They’re sometimes on one side, then on the other, or they’re out of sight, entirely behind the planet. But I’ve never seen them move away.”

“That must be beautiful...” Orrin muses longingly.

Even with the spyglass, the planet and its moons are mere pinpricks of light, and yet Murtagh knows what he means. “It is.” He hopes to show him one day.

At last, Orrin turns to a page with several planetary diagrams and he hums appraisingly. “You know, there are theories that the alignment of the planets are partially responsible for Eoam’s Floating Crystal.” Murtagh purses his lips skeptically. “Your mark against these kinds of models-” he runs a finger down the page- “actually supports that idea, I’d say.”

“Really? But that’s magic,” Murtagh counters. “I have a hard time believing the heavens have any hand in it.”

“True, but it’s a rare case where the magic itself is a natural phenomenon. I felt quite the same way, honestly, until the Southern Islands were added to Surda’s territory and I had the chance to visit myself. I found first hand records of how the Crystal’s behavior changed with time, with the days and nights, and also through the seasons. Once I was there, close enough to see it myself, I noticed how it consistently responded to the tides, even. I never would have realized if I couldn’t go.”

“Hmm, so it seems like the proximity helped you understand?”

He links his hands behind Murtagh’s waist. “Alright, alright, you win,” he surrenders readily. “Yes, I’ve taken those theories much more seriously since then. And these other models are the most common counter argument. For my own amusement, I tried applying those old records to the proposed equations to calculate when the next transit of the Ruby will be. But alas, I still have to wait another...” he tilts his head and stares up towards the ceiling- “twenty seven years to know if I was right.”

“You always are- I’ll clear my schedule.” Orrin laughs.

Murtagh sways restlessly as the pause extends itself, then abandons subtlety to prompt, “So you like it?”

Orrin meets his eye with a little, incredulous scoff, so utterly fond. “Dear, I adore it. It’s absolutely incredible.” His hands fidget with his tunic. Quietly, “It’s kind of staggering; you didn’t have to go to so much trouble for me.”

Murtagh shakes his head. “I wanted to give something you’d truly love... because I love your love.” Orrin’s exhale shivers as he pulls him into a kiss.

[subwonwooagenda]

Albert Blithe NSFW HCs

Summary:

Pairings: Albert Blithe x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Smut, mentions of WW2, use of the word ‘pussy’ stfu it’s a warning to me, unprotected sex (PRACTICE SAFE SEX 😤), mentions of pregnancy

Requested By: @ghoulsister1 Hope its what you wanted :)

Oh boy

We’re gonna talk about your first time but ill touch basis on small things too

The first time you two fucked this poor baby was a nervous wreck

He was a virgin and I BELIEVE IN SOFT ALBERT SUPREMECY

It was the night before he had to leave for boot camp, you two spent the whole day together, what better way to end it.

You two had a long talk beforehand about each of your likes and dislikes, well you did most of the talking, he sat there adorably blushing

Once the night began to close and you two found yourselves in your room was when it hit him what was about to happen

He was nervous but with your lips slowly trailing down to his neck he seemed to forget exactly what he was nervous about to begin with

Neither of you believed he would last long, the whimpers that fell from his lips as you moved your hand over the obvious tent in his pants only growing more and more desperate

Now that’s not to say he didn’t make sure you were feeling your top pleasure

He would never admit it out loud but his friends did give him some ‘tips’ about the night

And classic good boy fashion he made sure he gave just as well as he took

He relished in your moans as he slipped his fingers under your skirt, the tips of his fingers moving like a ghost over your clothed pussy

He could feel himself twitch nonstop in his pants, wondering what the warmth of your pussy would feel like wrapped around his cock instead of his fingers

He’s a careful boy, taking his time to properly stretch you out, plus he wanted to see how loud his fingers could make you

Time was like a blur to him, soon finding both of you under the covers, your skin touching his as you two looked at eachother with love

You two had a long talk about whether or not you two wanted to be safe about it but you both knew there was no one else for you so the thought of pregnancy wasn’t scary to you.

and as morbid as it was, if he were to not come home you wanted a piece of him to cherish forever.

He promised himself he’d never forget the way you looked when he finally pushed himself inside of you, his forehead resting against yours, your skin glowing as you welcomed the pleasure he gave you

Once he got in a rhythm, you practically saw stars

He wasn’t small so he was touching places inside you that you didn’t even know were there

Both of you were sure your neighbors would resent you for the rest of their lives, you weren’t too loud but your voice definitely traveled through the thin walls

Bliss was all you could experience

In that moment, wrapped up in his arms, in such a vulnerable and intimate way you almost didn’t want to let him leave the next morning

He sounded beautiful

I don’t think he’d be a moaner but he’d definitely give some grunts and groans that sound so lovely in your ear

He can tell when you’re close, the way your hand tightened on his bicep and your legs tighten themselves around his waist

He’s right there with you, his eyes shut as his head falls to muzzle into your neck, giving a few more thrusts before he spills inside you, both of you letting out a few more moans as you basked in the warmth of both your releases mixing inside you

There wasn’t much talking afterward, there didn’t need to be.

He cleaned you up, provided you with love and affection in his on quiet little way before he laid next to you, holding you close and praying to whatever power up there that he would make it back to you and, he hopes, his child.

[cultfed]

the  world  holds  no  room  for  child-like  wonder;  morbid  be  the  boy  whose  eyes  sought  the  nameless.   vindicated  by  excuses,  children  were  so  inclined  to  vivid  imaginations,  pay  no  heed  to  the  terror  writhing  at  blackened  peripherals.  he  understood  silence,   the  necessity  to  hold  one’s  tongue,  even  as  strident  chatter  rung  in  his  ears,   the  grotesque  creaking  of  a  neck  as  it  rotated  to  stare  at  him,  unblinking.   his  stomach  churned ,  hands  clammy.   he  yearned  to  tow  his  mother’s  skirt ,  seek  haven  in  the  familiar ,   he  wondered  what  that  reprieve  was  like.   swatting  hands,  dismissive  -  tremoring.   she  raised  her  voice  enough  to  drown  them  out  until  her  rejection  was  the  only  sound.   he  sat ,   eyes  affixed  to  translucent  wings,   in  the  light  they  shone  prismatic.  it  was  too  large  to  be  an  insect ,   too  other-wordly  to  herald  from  anything  other  than  his  imagination.   the  other  children  avoid  him ,  laughter  raucous ,  its  wings  echoing  a  soft   hum  as  it  takes  off.   a  rock  skitters  to  a  halt  in  its  shadow  ,   retrieving  him  from  the  apparition’s  thrall.  he  doesn’t  know  whose  voice  it  is  but  one  of  them  lurches  forward  ,   hands  planted  firmly  on  his  hips ;  calling  him  a  weirdo,  a  freak.   he  wanders  home  that  day,  fingers  wrapped  firmly  around  his  bag  straps  turning  it  over  in  his  thoughts.   a  freak ,   was  his  mother  right.  his  father  was  not  inclined  to  hear  of  his  drivel  but  did  not  don  consternation  in  the  furrow  of  his  brow  like  his  mother.   he  comes  home  late ,  the  sky  pitch  black,   even  the  stars  withered  in  his  wake.   a  man  walks  in  behind  him ,   an  important  person,  the  stark  white  of  his  clothes  and  kindness  that  creases  his  eyes  says  so.   he  says  that  this  child  will  find  salvation,   his  parents  are  relieved  so  it  must  be  a  good  thing.  others visit  sometimes,  often  in  the  evenings  and  are  met  with  profound  gratitude ,  he  had  learnt  to  also  be  thankful even  though  he  did  not  know  why.  he  learns  that  reticence  appeases  them,  that  his  uncanny  descriptions  are�� the  reason  he  is  disliked.  he  ruminates  upon  it ,   asking  quietly  why  he  is  the  only  one  who  can  see  them.  the  neighbours  have  stopped  coming  over  ,  he  doesn’t  inquire  why  but  his  mother’s  face  tightens  around  their  ostracism.  her  words  wane  into  cruelty,  her  patience  a  river  -  dried ,   earth  worn  down.   his  father  says that  they  will  be  moving  soon  and  that  there  will  be  no  more  of  his  absurd  ramblings.  he  doesn’t  look  forward  to  it  -  but  feels  that  he  should.  dark  lashes  flutter ,  beneath  the  shade  of  a  tree  he’s  fallen  into  the  past.  it  haunts   him  sometimes ,  a  dull  aching.   part  of  him  wants  to  return  to  his  youth  if  only  to  tell  the  child  that  he  is  not  alone.  laughter  passes  the  familiar  ,  blithe  grin  of  his  classmate  -  satoru  and  somewhere  ,  under  the  warmth  of  the  afternoon  sun,  a  translucent  pair  of  wings  flutter.  

a little rambling i've had in my brain courtesy of @sugurau's hc's. <3

[tokillamockingbird427]

more hc for our favorite boys? (keegan and logan)

They're very happy with each other but at the same time they're constantly worried about the other dying on missions. Logan has kind of accepted it as a fact that either he or Keegan is gonna have to witness the other die, and he'd like them to grow old together, but at the same time he doesn't find it likely unless they both leave the military. (Which isn't very likely for Keegan.)

Keegan's very cuddly and Logan really enjoys just hanging out with his loved ones, so they're around each other a lot.

Hesh keeps giving Logan plants because he's a plant guy and he likes gifting things but Logan has no clue how to take care of plants. He'd kinda just let them die or give them to someone else because he knew Hesh would just give him more. However, Keegan is of the opinion that it's rude not to take care of a gift or re-gift it to someone else, so he winds up just having a hoard of plants he takes care of for Logan. (Hesh is overjoyed that his little brother has finally found his green thumb, is blithely unaware it's Keegan taking care of them all.)

Both of them have a hobby the other is terrified of but still attempted/attempts to participate in because they love the other: Keegan really likes motorcycles and driving them around, but Logan is high-key terrified of them and will only ride if Keegan is driving. Logan loves surfing but Keegan wiped out so bad the first time he tried that he just never ever went back in again. Logan even made him a custom surfboard first because Keegan was kinda hype about it but he got humbled by the ocean so hard that he swore himself off it. He still goes to the beach with Logan but stays in the shallows and hypes his man up from afar. (They also watch surfing comps together!)

They have a rule to always spend at least one meal in a day together. Usually that meal is breakfast, it's hardly ever lunch, and dinner usually turns into a date if they get the chance to spend it together.

Keegan is an avid gamer and he uses Logan as a little butler sometimes. "Honey, can you get me some water? I'm in the middle of a game right now..." Logan gets annoyed that Keegan isn't paying attention to him and brings him a glass of ice. Keegan also bugs Logan to play co-op with him as a show of affection, and Logan honestly loves it.

Everytime they go grocery shopping they wind up with an unreasonable amount of snack and candy. It's Logan's fault. With hsi sweet tooth and a cute face, Keegan just can't say no. (He does try to keep them away from the candy/snack isles. Key word: Try.)

Keegan likes daydreaming about having kids and talks with Logan about it. "If we had a kid, I'd teach them how to play smash bros..." or "When we have a kid, I'm gonna buy them all the cool shit I never got as a kid. Like RC cars and little playhouses...." and if they go to the store and like pass the clothing isle he'll point out outfits he'd buy for them. Logan finds it really cute and always listens. He likes thinking about a future where they can feel safe and un-busy enough to bring a kid into the equation.

[everyones-least-favorite-bard]

LOWKEY IT BEING KIND OF CANON IS WHY I LIKE IT SO MUCH

like he already blithely goes on his way having near kisses and intense borderline frotting sessions with every guy he spends more than an hour with in canon and i am unfortunately a bit of a slut for staying within reasonable bounds of canon. microdosing malicious compliance by keeping bruce wayne straight but making him still neck ghostmaker whenever they fight

FOOD IS MADE WITH LOVE,, ,youre so real for that though goddd. yeahghgjh. he works so hard someone SHOULD take care of him. i would do it. i would do it for him

my reason isnt wholly mine though i have to give that credit to one of @/husborths fics for planting that idea in me. although her idea is WRETCHED (affectionate)

i personally dont think its bad music but i do have unconscionably bad taste lmao. the idea mostly stems from my personal hc (also stemmed largely for my amusement) that damian listens exclusively to like early 2010s vocaloid and like nightcore remixes. i bet that boy loves miku

SOOO TRUE ABOUT TALIA LIKE WHO WOULDNT BE BROKEN AFTER LOSING THAT

🔥 for the brucester

OOOOH thats kinda hard actually i feel like i dont have very strong brucie takes

that being said while it isnt something i genuinely believe i do like to entertain the idea that bruce is actually straight just because i think itd be funny if he has all these deeply intense, deeply emotionally fraught, and deeply, deeply, WEIRD homoerotic relationships with other men because hes just Like That. thats just how he makes friends. he doesnt want to fuck any of them even a little bit.

what else. hm. i bet he actually can cook pretty well but pretends hes really bad at it so alfred+his kids can "help" him in the kitchen. i think he likes dad rock too. i bet he listens to steely dan. john mellencamp. completely unfounded but i think itd be fun. imagining damian in the car witheringly sitting through fuckin pet sounds or something while bruce hums and taps the steering wheel

hm. is saying hes still not over talia a hot take or just true. i bet he cries himself to sleep on their anniversary. sniveling wretch (affectionate).

there are probably things i could say about bruce-and-batman regarding the split identity idea but i want 2 save those thoughts for a proper post but still. i dont think my take is very hot on that its really just an extension of what btas established