#blah blah blabbity blah

[violet-amet]

posted a lot of limbus company. feel free to tag them as lcb to block. i just love don quixote so much.

[a-trying-writer]

(srhk short - semi suggestive)

Even though the nightmares had ended, Capricious still had trouble sleeping. She already had done her stretches, cleaned her board, and her room and bathroom, but her body felt restless.

Three in the morning, and she still couldn't sleep. It was starting to get frustrating. She could go down to the basement to bother Racter, but he told her that he was going to be too busy to entertain her, which means that he also needs his space, which she understands. And everyone else is asleep.

She could take a marker and write something on Duncan's face. But that would only be fun for a few minutes.

A short groan growled in her throat, as she rolled over her bed for the upteenth time.

Probably it would be for the best that she get some fresh air instead.

As she was about to get up, Capricious heard the scratch of a match on a box, and saw a flame burn in the hall outside of her door. She stared directly into Racter's eyes as he turned to her, and he smirked from amusement. "You're awake," Capricious pointed out, surprised.

"And you as well it seems."

"Do you need the shower?"

"No... Well, not now."

"All right." Capricious slightly tilted her head as the two sat in silence for a minute. "Can't sleep?"

"If you weren't a criminal, I'd say you'd make an impressive detective, my friend."

She let out a snort. "It's not every night I see you out here, Racter. Which brings me to wonder..."

"Why I am up here instead of my workshop," he continues, as he steps inside her room and leans against the wall. "I have long finished my latest work, but I will have to do some tests to see if Koschei can handle it. That will unfortunately have to wait until I have gathered all the parts to create it."

"Running out of resources? That sucks."

"It was bound to happen sooner or later."

"You know, since I can't sleep yet, I can do a quick smash and grab for you if you want, Racter."

"Tempting offer, my friend, but what I need isn't something you can easily find. Some of the materials I work with are much more valuable than you'd think."

"Is there anything I could do to help with that?"

"No... But perhaps you could help me waste the night away."

Capricious paused to think. Before realizing what Racter could be implying, and felt her cheeks blush. "Now that's a bigger surprise." She chuckled. "I thought you want some space."

"And you gave that to me, my friend."

"Right... Well, since I can't sleep, I think it would be fun. Just locked that door for me please."

It's truly not every night that this happens, she thought, as she watched him seal that door. She just hopes that she won't be so loud.

[violet-amet]

It's been a while since I last saw RWBY, but one character has to deal with his identity after realizing his is an incarnation of a super old wizard dude. Kinda shares the body by having two souls sorta deal. But it's been a while, so don't quote me on that.

I think there has only been a few times where plurality in media was portrayed decently and like 90% of it was subtle or just has vibes of it.

i mean I'll obviously take that over the ableist shit but yeah.

[star-reader-ffxiv]

Same pose, different energies.

[stormofdefiance]

I wanted to share some wee thoughts about Ratio’s E6 art & why I believe it is a symbolic parallel to Michelangelo’s David. This speaks to both Ratio’s humanist beliefs and possible future plot points.

Ratio’s E6 is Vincit Omnia Veritas or Truth Conquers All. I’ve heard it claimed (although I have no idea if it’s explicitly stated anywhere?) that the character’s E6 art represents them at their innermost core, an honest and deeply vulnerable shard of themselves. Evoking David here is an interesting choice; the biblical figure who, using nothing but a stone and sling, took down the tyrannical Goliath. The parallel is perhaps as simple as this: Ratio views himself - and by extension the truth - as the underdog, someone never accepted into the Genius society, forever to be kept from Nous and THEIR gaze, but nonetheless will, in the end, prove himself the final victor. Truth will topple the seemingly unconquerable, whatever that might be.

But I also think Michelangelo’s David is a specifically interesting parallel to draw on from a historical perspective. Ratio is pretty much the textbook definition of a renaissance man - he is a philosopher, a scholar, interested in medicine and science and the vast array of human achievement. He speaks in Latin (the language of education during the renaissance in Europe that allowed the transmission of information without having to rely on translation) while heavily styling himself on Ancient Greek symbols and drawing from Greek philosophy (often seen at the time as more ‘sophisticated’ and interested in ‘wisdom’ than the contemporary ‘militaristic’ Romans).

Michelangelo’s David was the first colossal marble statue to be carved since antiquity, and it came to be a symbol of the renaissance itself. This is interesting to me for Ratio and what I believe are his humanist beliefs. Humanism was an ideal that propagated during the renaissance that championed the belief that man had beauty, dignity and worth that deserved as much respect and adoration as any deity. Keep in mind this philosophy was emerging following the Middle Ages and at a time where religious institutions across Europe held exorbitant and sometimes absolute power. David as a statue is an ode to the sublime beauty of the human body, completely unashamed and uninhibited in his gigantic nakedness (Doctor! You’re huge!) retaliating against the idea that prominent idea at the time that man’s body is inherently sinful. The humanists sought to recenter humanity, and David became a symbol of man’s independence against the seemingly unconquerable might of the Church.

Consider how Ratio centres humanity in his Simulated Universe project, how he values every life, how interested he is in constant self-improvement. How this symbol - of not just the renaissance but of the re-centring of humanity itself - becomes an echo of an effigy fixed in the centre of his soul.

Ratio has never - as far as I’m aware? - stated or hinted at any desire to overthrow the Aeons or even disparage or rubbish them, but it is clear to me that he believes in the strength man can draw on despite them, through sheer force of intelligence and clever planning and fiercely independent thought, the weak can ultimately overcome, or at least stand shoulder to shoulder with, the strong. Perhaps this will become a more pertinent plot point in the future - who knows? - but this was fun to chew through nonetheless 🫶

[vannalamba]

TAKES AN INCREDIBLY DEEP BREATH

curly. captain curly, grant curly, whatever his name is. curly. an enabler, an abuser’s ally, blabbity blabbity blah.

we all know what happens to him. jimmy crashes the ship after being crushed under the weight of his actions, curly tries to stop it and takes the damage ruining his body forever, is assaulted by jimmy whenever he gives him his meds, fed his own leg, and put into cryostasis to prolong his suffering rather than end it.

i see some people saying he still cares for jimmy even after the incident and only regrets what he did because it ended up in him being bedridden. and to that i say.. did you watch/play the game with a blindfold and your ears plugged???

did he act immediately after anya told him? no. should he have? yes. but we have to remember that he had just realized that his best friend— childhood best friend— was an abuser and a terrible person and he turned a blind eye to it.

no, that’s not an excuse for his actions, but so many people throw that away just to find an excuse to hate curly. hate him all you want, he’s not perfect, but he’s not the devil.

i think the developer’s games before mouthwashing, how fish is made and the last one and then another, portray curly’s thoughts while in the pod. he considers what he should’ve done instead and how he could be so naive, but ultimately has to face the reality of what his blindness lead to.

even so, after the confrontation with jimmy, curly was torn. he couldn’t do anything about it seeing as the ship needing a co-pilot and nobody else was qualified enough, but he wishes he did something, anything. because inevitably, his neglect lead to everybody else’s downfall.

there were two ways he could’ve avoided what happened: never recommend the job to jimmy, or put him in cryostasis the moment he found out and train somebody else to be co-pilot. he brought up the job because he wanted his best friend by his side during the long trip, and the idea of locking jimmy away hurt him, scared him even. so he remained idle by choice until he didn’t have one.

in short, there were a lot of things he could’ve done. he didn’t do them. he hurt and lead everyone to their doom. but i know that if he had a choice, he would take off his rose tinted glasses and act. they could never make me hate you curly

[aut1smkid]

I'm not okay.

I've been dealing with a lot lately, experiencing anxiety and facing comments about my age. That and when I was at group today, the boys were saying mean things to me and being immature towards me. I feel like shit. Everyone always tells me "You're too young for websites like this." And blah blah blabbity blah more shit like that. People judge me based on my identity.

"It wasn't TRYING to be that way!"

Oh really? Trying? Well I'm trying my best to keep a better image. I'm trying every single day of my life to be happy and grateful. I'm trying to be normal.

[boombambaby]

@littlebadger asked: ❛ what is this guy babbling about ? ❜ [ taken from here! ]

Kuzco yawns, struggling to keep the boredom out of his expression until he realizes that; oh, that's right. He doesn't have to.

" No clue. All I hear is blah, blah, blabbity-blah, blah. You ask one guy for directions to the bathroom, and you get a lecture instead.

-- This common around here? "

[dontforgetoctober3rd]

Aemond mini fic (Luke survives and comes for revenge)

Ok, so picture a Kill Bill style, Vernita vs Beatrix revenge battle scene.

After killing Luke, Aemond exiles himself after killing several other people (lets say he also offs Rhaenyra in this au) and becomes a farmer and has like 5 kids with some random Volantis girl. (Vhagar is dead idk how just go with it ok) All the kids come out silver haired. Blah blah blabbity blah its a mundane but peaceful life.

The children are playing in a field while their father Aemond watches over the sheep or whatever, his pregnant wife busying herself in the kitchen in their modest manor house.

Then a stranger approaches Aemond while he is leaning on a fence in the field. A dark-haired stranger.

Its Luke.

Older, taller, and significantly more battle-worn. He's wearing a sword on his back.

Aemond of course freezes in horror as Luke walks to him, smiling like they're old friends and just sits himself on the fence Aemond was leaning on.

"They won't see me kill you, don't worry." Luke will say, taking a drink from his water skin and watching Aemond's children running to their father as they tire of playing.

"I'll invite myself to supper, I think?" Luke will say, to Aemond's continued shock. "Of course, so long as I'm not intruding, dear uncle."

Aemond immediately attacks with a sword he always keeps on himself, barking at his kids to run to the house and away with their mother. The kids obey without question while their father begins to battle this stranger on their lands.

"My children and wife have never paid for any debts that I incur and they won't start now."

The battle ends with Aemond dead and Luke looking at his corpse, then seeing a small silver-haired face peeking from behind a cart near the house. Aemond's eldest.

"You don't deserve to live life without a father, and for that I'm sorry." Luke will call out. "but Aemond Targaryen should have thought of that before committing all manner of atrocities against my family."

Then Luke will leave as Aemond's son runs to him.

[toastingpencils37]

Dragons Rising Inktober Day 10: The Battle For The Second Monastery

Blabbity blah there will be no Regular Inktober post tomorrow blah blah should be a Dragons Rising one that may not be on time.

[anneimaginesundertale]

S/O Sings, unknown audience with Grim, He probably catches it on camera XD

Was it creepy, watching you on camera when you didn't know? Perhaps. Was it creepy to have cameras in your own home? Perhaps. Did Grim care at all? No.

He definitely hadn't intended to watch you today. He'd gotten an alert from the camera that there was an unusual noise in the kitchen and had turned the feed on expecting to see and hear a burglar. Instead, he had seen you, twirling around with a mixing bowl and singing at the top of your lungs.

You were...not the greatest singer. Not that he'd ever tell you that. You were loud, you apparently didn't know all the words of what you were singing (half of your song went "dee dee dah dah dah, blabbity blah, yeah!"), and you sang with your whole body. Grim winced as some of the contents of the mixing bowl were flung onto his kitchen cabinets.

For all your flaws in performance technique, Grim could not look away from you. Something about this was endearing, adorable even. He watched you until you triumphantly put your baked good (some kind of muffins or cupcakes) into the oven and finished your song on a screechy high note.

"Thank you, Mt. Ebott!" you cried. "I'm here all week!"

Grim couldn't resist. The camera had a speaker option. He clicked the button and called, "Encore, encore!" He wasn't entirely sure it was worth the shriek. Or the dropped mixing bowl.

"I'm going to get you, Grim!" you shouted before he turned the camera off.

[violet-amet]

ugh.

lost my benefits. shit suuucks. ill figure things out, but i really need that money for food. fuck.

[a-trying-writer]

(original poem/short of sorts.)

I am a woman, dressed in black metal that I stole from royalty. My head shielded in a helmet that carries a beastly smile. My gloves carved into claws that could pierce even the most durable armor.

I took down knights of all kinds with just my fists, and took their power for myself. The supposed strongest could never stop me. Not even the highest ranked knights that were guards of royalty.

Until I met the one man who stared at me with his helmet that carried a mocking smile. I swore I had him at the edge. I slashed at his neck that should had been exposed. But he still stood, and carried a second helmet in his arms.

He kicked me back and waved his helmet in the air above me, before tossing it towards me. It was similar to his mocking smile. "We will meet again," he told me, before falling off the edge willingly. I dashed towards it to see if he fell into the water below, but there wasn't a splash or a ripple.

A sigh escaped from me. I turned back to the helmet to pick it up. I could replace my current one with it, but that mocking smile...

I hate it.

Despite how I could feel about that knight.

[automatismoateo]

Son in law drew a cross on our door. via /r/atheism

Son in law drew a cross on our door. My daughter started dating an evangelical Christian guy and he quickly moved her to his State (we are Canadian) 26 hours away from us and “converted” her to his way of thinking because his way “is the truth”. They married shortly after. They have recently come upon a life change and are living with myself and my spouse until they get things sorted. Son-in-law began by sending me scriptures and videos to which I ignored and/or told him that I believe differently. He then made a point to say that those who don’t believe in Christ will go to hell. Blabbity blah blah…. Over the weeks that he has been living in my house, he has made comments to my daughter such as “I am the man and you will respect me” and “ you agreed to submit to me when you married me” and “it doesn’t matter what your parents think. I’m your Guardian”. He yells at her for hours on end. She doesn’t yell back but she does cry. Before you ask, yes, I have spoken to my daughter about all of it and she defends him and says how much she loves him. I get the sense that she relays everything I say back to him and I feel her pulling away at times. Tonight, while I was cleaning around the outside of my house, I saw a cross drawn into the dust of my front door. It was done with water. I am so angry. I don’t necessarily want advice on how to handle the situation (I’ve got something in the works) but I would appreciate any context that former evangelicals could provide as to what the cross implies especially as he knows we don’t believe. I’m quite sure that he didn’t do it intentionally to disrespect us but rather more of a meaning or symbol for himself and my daughter. Perhaps to protect them from evil since my spouse and I are “sinners”? Submitted August 29, 2024 at 01:34AM by Exact-Direction-2020 (From Reddit https://ift.tt/x2GJOdZ)

[saintheartwing]

May the Force Be With You, Ch.16: So You Wanna Be A Sith?

“If you want to play the part of Sith, you’re going to have to start acting like one.”

Zack sat across from his partner as Omarosa nonchalantly twirled her saber around, pacing back and forth in front of the fire they sat at. “…I’m pretty sure I’ve got an idea of how to be all imposing and scary and all that-”

“No, no, no, it’s one thing to just send a scary video to people. Anybody with a stupid camera could do that. We need to work on changing your attitude. You have to learn to confront the darkness by really understanding what it is. Mara gave you that whole spiel on how the Dark Side’s all seductive and dangerous and blabbity blabbity blah. The Dark Side’s like a chainsaw, it’s a tool. If you use it right, like a normal chainsaw, it can cut down a tree. If you use it wrong, like in “Chainsaw Slut Massacre IV”, then you’ll be sawing through sexy co-eds on a college campus.”

“…Chainsaw Slut Massacre?”

“Yes.”

“There’s fucking FOUR of them?!?” 

“People reeeeaaally like seeing sexy coeds being splattered in blood from giant chainsaws. There’s actually this really amazing scene in the film where the villain gets taken out by this THERMAL DETONATOR that the heroine sticks in the big lug’s mouth, the practical effects are astounding!” Omarosa bragged. 

“Wait, wait, I read about that, didn’t they have to go to court to prove to the New Republic court that they didn’t actually kill off the cast because the blood splatter looked so real?” Zack realized as he snapped his fingers. “Yeah, yeah, I read about that in the news! Everyone kept talking about the director being super sleazy and suspicious!”

“He weaseled out of any jail time because evidently he used clones for the performances he REALLY wanted to make good.” Omarosa admitted with a nod. “The law still hasn’t caught up to science on that level, they couldn’t really make a ruling because there’s no laws on the books about clones ever since the Old Republic texts got swept away and all those cloning factories went bye-bye. People just assumed nobody would ever have to put up with clones again until the director dragged it into the public eye. Nobody’s seen clones for decades, so nobody wanted to deal with it. Certainly not in the courts.”

“Yeah, that’s a big can of worms…the director got off easy.”

“Course, now he can’t make any more of those films now that everyone knows how he did those amazing practical effects…” Omarosa sighed. “He went missing, too. The rumor is that his own clone did him in! That’s what everyone’s thinking. But him being so sleazy and devilishly ingenious is one of those things you could  learn from! What he did was underhanded and down right dirty and it DEFINITELY bent the law so hard it almost snapped in two. But that’s the sort of stuff you’ve got to learn to do if you want to be a good Sith!” Omarosa proclaimed. 

“So I need to be…petty and lowdown and resort to scummy tricks.  I mean, I did throw that sand in Darth Sed’yshun’s face…” Zack confessed.

“Yeah, you’re off to a good start! Next time…use glass. Grind up glass, keep it in your belt. Some powdered glass will work wonders. Your enemies won’t be nearly as strong when they’re BLIND.” Omarosa insisted as she showed off a small bag herself, jiggling it around. “But what we really need to work on above all else is that you need to be more than just using cheap, nasty tricks. It’s a MINDSET that has to carry over.” Omarosa put the bag away, got out a big, fat stick, and drew up a line as the two stood at the edges of the jungle at what had been the Jedi Temple only a short few weeks ago. 

“Now…here, we get into the middle of this big ring.”  She drew a line through the center, then stood on one end as Zack stood on the other. “Now. I’m your adversary. I am evil. EEEEEVIIIIL. Got it?” Omarosa inquired as she spun the big stick around. “See this line in the dirt? Now, you must dare…to cross that line! To challenge me!”

“…okay, sure.” Zack immediately moved to cross the line, and THA-THWAK! She bonked him over the head. “Ow! What the heck?! You told me not to cross the line! What’s that for?”

“Cuz I’m evil. Can’t help it.” Omarosa remarked. “Get it? If you’re evil, you need to care less about basic civility. Like…totally.” She added with a big, toothy grin. “I want you to have an attitude of low-grade…well, pissyness. Towards the whole world.  Like, I want you thinking “Geez, I can’t stand everything around me right now”. Think like that.”

“…that sounds really exhausting.” Zack admitted. “Like, having to have that attitude all the time, where you’re constantly in a bad mood sounds like it would wear you down and make you really bitter and meanspirited.”

“Yes…but it’s empowering, too. Because if you’re at your lowest point…there’s NOWHERE TO GO BUT UP.” Omarosa added. “And it feels good when you bring other people to that level. Now let’s move on to the next issue. Trust.”

“Oh, are we gonna do, like, trust fall exercises?” Zack asked. “We did a bunch of those in Jedi training.”

“Sure. Turn around, and I’ll catch you with nothing but my Force powers.” Omarosa said as Zack turned around, held out his arms, then fell back and-THWUMPH.

Hit the ground as Omarosa stood over him, then whacked him in the middle of the forehead with the butt of the stick. “See, the message there is trust nobody.” 

“Yeah. I GOT THAT. I’m beginning to see why this “Sith” thing is so alluring…” He grumbled. “Because now I’m beginning to feel like I wanna zap you with some force lightning!” 

“THAT’S the ticket!” Omarosa laughed. “Now, let’s get into the most basic training of all…instinct. You need a killer instinct. It’s not enough to just block my blows like a Jedi would. You’re gonna need to learn to go on the offensive without use of your eyes for this next-”

This time, it was OMAROSA who ended up learning a lesson. The lesson being “Zack had gotten amazingly good at fighting blind after months on end of practice and using it in the field”. After being given his own stick to fight with and putting a blindfold over his eyes, Omarosa thought she’d be able to whack him over the head AGAIN…only for him to twirl around and do a sweep, knocking her off her feet before SHUDDA-KA-THWAM! A powerful blow slammed her down into the ground. 

It didn’t take long before he was practically raining blows on her every time she tried to strike at him. She would sweep at him from the left, he’d duck and jab her in the ribs, then another sweeping strike would knock her back. She tried to go for HIS legs, and he’d jump up, kick her in the chin, knocking her on the ground so he could just HAMMER her into the dirt below. Try as Omarosa might, she just couldn’t land a single blow on him once the “instinct” lesson began, and in the end, she was covered in bruises and welts and had a bloody nose as she groaned, rubbing her swollen cheek, talking like she had a gigantic wad of towels forcibly stuffed in her mouth.

“Id uhks ike u dun need no tuhnin reguhhding dat kinda sduff. I dink u god a gud idyuh of huh tuh fuhd, u god a eel kuhuh indink.” (It looks like you don’t need no training regarding THAT kind of stuff. I think you’ve got a good idea of how to fight, you got a real killer instinct!)

“Thanks.” Zack cheerily intoned as he took the blindfold off. “…now how about I patch you up?”

“STUHPH SMYLIN!” (Stop smiling!!!)

“Nope. You were right, bringing other people down to your level really DOES feel surprisingly good!” He confessed with a big grin. “I can’t stop smiling!”

“Muddafudda Imma godda stik dis stik up yur ass-”

Needless to say, Zack had taken these lessons to heart. He was determined to prove he was a real Sith…and he was going to make sure that the Dyad and their forces knew it. And he knew just how to get started…

THE NEXT WEEK…

“NO! No, please, no! AAHHH! Anything but this!”

“I’ll let you off once you start talking. It really is just that simple.”

Zack had evidently decided to start things off with a bang. He’d been stalking the captain of the guards at the Dyad’s tower, finding out where they went home at the end of the day, who they hung around with, a different captain every single day. There were three of them, meaning he had at least two days to devote to stalking them, staying hidden among the common folk of Nar Shadaa, wearing inconspicuous clothing, basic shirt, a large hat to hide most of his hair, a slump in his walk, and a seemingly empty eye socket to indicate how much of a degraded, low-down-on-his-luck rando he really was. A common, begging bum on the street who was just trudging along miserably, ignored, either willfully or otherwise, by the common man. 

People didn’t really ever pay much attention to the beggars and the poor on the streets. They would shell out big bucks to see a dead Mandalorian on display at a museum. But they wouldn’t give a single credit to a bling beggar down the block. This meant that Zack could go unnoticed as a beleaguered, half-blind bum.

And this meant he’d been able to follow each captain of the guard to their homes. He’d waited until the time was ripe, and then snatched the first one up when they slept. It was tricky! After all, he had to get them out the nearby window. The first one though, slept with their window open because summer had arrived and it was miserably hot in Nar Shaddaa and SOMEHOW the air conditioning in the entire apartment complex had been knocked out and would take a few hours to fix…

Gee, whoever could have done that?

“Please! Pleeeaaase don’t!”

“Okay, then tell me when the next shipment of weapons arrives for the Dyad, Captain Neehra.” He informed the woman nonchalantly as he stood by the gigantic buzzsaw. He’d hooked the light-brown-skinned woman up to a contraption that was slowly feeding her towards this buzzsaw, miles away from Nar Shadaa in a formerly-abandoned mill, and he was humming nonchalantly, one hand on the machine that fed her ever-closer to the saw, the other holding up an apple he casually munched on. 

“I don’t know! I don’t know, Darth Mendax!”

“Well, then, I guess we’re going to find out which is your better side…” Zack trailed off. 

“Two days! It’s coming in two days! Midday!” The terrified captain of the guard squealed out. “That’s all I know!” 

“See? Was that really so difficult?” Zack commented cheerily. “…now I just need to figure out how to STOP this thing…”  He added as he turned back to the console, feeling over it.

“WHAT?!” Captain Neehra shrieked.

“I only just figured out how to turn it on. I didn’t get to the part about turning it off. Now, where’s that power cord…?” Zack commented as the BZZZZZZZZZZ of the saw got louder and louder, Neehra shrieking up a storm and at such a high pitch that only dogs would soon be able to hear her before Zack promptly decided to SCHA-THWIIISH! Cut through the whole machine, turning it off JUST before the blade reached Neehra as she breathed a deep, long sigh of relief before Zack conked her over the head to knock her out.

“You know what the best part about this was?” He asked as he and Omarosa helped load the captain of the first guard into their vehicle to bring her back to Nar Shadaa. He smirked, holding up the “buzzsaw”, and waving it about. “Papier-mâché. Totally recyclable.” 

“Oh my lord, I think she actually peed her pants a bit!” Omarosa laughed as they stuffed the poor captain into the backseat. “What a sissy!”

The next captain of the guard was a lot tricker to get hold of until you figured out how much he loved to hang out at the same bar.  He was currently in the back room with a few of his lackeys, who he was forcing to play cards with.

…no. No, it wasn’t Poker.

“Ha HA.  Go Fish!”

“Yeah, boss. Go Fish. You sure are the best at this…” One of the guards groaned as the smug-looking Nemodian took hold of their winnings they’d been forced to bet and “made it rain” as he tossed them up into the air, spinning around on his rotating chair. 

“Hahahahaha! Ohhh, I never get tired of doing this!”

And then the lights immediately went out. All of them blinked in surprise before rising up, pulling out their weapons, quickly bunching up to try and look for whomever had turned the lights on…before a faint hum filled the air, and they glanced up,  seeing the light of a red lightsaber illuminating a foully-grinning Darth Mendax.

“Hello.” Zack said before he jumped down on all of them! They screamed and yelled hollered but were quickly shut up, Zack beating the stuffing out of all of them whilst Darth Omarosa kept the bouncer right outside the door very busy.

“Wait, seriously, you actually think that HORRIBLE Barbie Girl song’s good? No. No way. I mean, I know the Dyad like to do silly songs sometimes-” Omarosa was insisted as she poured the bouncer another bit of fine wine from her flask.

“It’s called ironic enjoyment.” The bouncer insisted as the rather thick-armed, thick-haired Wookie scratched at himself, speaking in a surprisingly good Basic galactic dialect. “Don’t they teach you youngsters anything in schools?”  

“Hmmm…okay, okay, I guess I can see that. Does that include that Wave Your Hands Side to Side song they did?”

“Oh GOD, that’s just pure garbage.”

“I KNOW, right? But my friend, he just loves everything about it. I think he enjoys dumb party music way too much…”

Ten minutes later, the men that Zack had “collected” woke to find themselves currently blindfolded…but not for long. 

“This is a little thing called  “trust exercise” that I think is going to really help you all understand where I’m coming from. You can remove your blindfolds.” They heard him say, all of them shuddering, wondering why it was so chilly out when it was the middle of summer! Shakily, their hands reached up to their blindfolds…and then, as they took them off, they saw why.  

“Oh my stars and fucking garters.” The Nemodian captain of the guard said aloud. They’d been dragged to the top of the building. A good three stories up. They all turned around, fearfully gazing at the Sith as he nonchalantly tapped his foot.

“Now, we’re gonna play MY game. It’s called “Tell me the codes for that moon facility.” I want to know how to get in. And if you don’t tell me, we’re gonna play a game I like to call “Splatter Painting 101”. Now, granted, I’m blind, I can’t appreciate the post modern mastery of splatter art but I know plenty of people do like analyzing the patterns that your blood will no doubt form once I push you off the edge.”

“…y-you don’t scare us. It may be three stories but a fall like this still wouldn’t kill somebody like me!” Said the Gammorean guard who was there.

“…you’re right. You’ve got QUITE the bone structure. If I just pushed you off, it wouldn’t kill you. Now, If I did THIS…”

Zack clenched his fist tight, and bit his lip as he looked in the direction of that gammorean, and the unfortunate levitated right off his feet, and twirled upside down, hovering RIGHT off the edge of the building. 

“See, now, a fall like THIS would kill you. Don’t you think? And don’t bother looking at those nice, soft, thick bushes down below…even landing in those wouldn’t cushion your fall. Now, is the captain of the guard going to kindly tell me what I want, or do I have to start tossing all his card buddies off the building first before-”

“He’ll talk!...RIGHT, boss?!” The other assembled guards there gave the captain very furious, dark, “don’t you screw us over on this” looks as he sheepishly gulped and tugged at the collar of his longsleeve shirt he wore.

“…um…I…er…y-yes, of-of course.” He murmured. “Uh…the-the code is 19465.” The Nemodian squeaked out. “That will get you into the moon base. I don’t know any of the other codes. I promise you that. It’s designed to be that way. Nobody gets told more than they have to just in case we got captured by forces from the New Republic.”

“Oh, believe you me. You’ve given me everything I wanted. Now…see your death.” Zack nonchalantly flicked his wrist, and the Gammorean flew off the edge. “See your death!” 

FLICK!

“AAAAH!”

“See your death!”

FLICK!

“EEEEE!”

“See your death!”

FLICK!

“NOOOOO!”

“See your deeaaaath!”

FLICK!

“WAAAAAAAUGH!”

“As for you, Captain Sibista, don’t worry, we’re cool.” Zack said as he approached the captain of the guard, the Nemodian breathing a sigh of relief.

“Really?”

“Nah! See your death!” He flat out shoved the man right off the edge, and the guy fell down, down, down…

THWUD. Passing out the second he hit the ground.

Or so he thought. In actually, Omarosa had been hiding IN those thick bushes down below and she’d used HER force powers along with Zack to hover them right down…yes…into the other bushes. One after the other, each one landed, passing out either due to sheer fear or getting conked the head as they hit the bushes. It’d be enough to hurt them…but not enough to kill them. They would make sure of that. The guards would think a freak accident saved them. Quickly bolting off down the street, Omarosa waited in their arranged hiding spot as Zack made his way over to her about five minutes later, holding up a few things.

“I got their pass keys to their vehicles…and their wallets.” He added.

“Spoken like a true Sith!” She laughed. “We’ve got about two hours or so before they wake up. Let’s break into all their stuff and take what we can, then get it back to them. They’re gonna be so confused when they realize all the good s—t is missing from their rides!...along with half their money!”

“Oh, the Captain’s such a GENEROUS man. I’m thinking…all he’s got. Going right back to the others…” Zack reasoned nonchalantly with a small little Mona Lisa smile on his face. 

…

…

…

…the third captain of the guard, however…didn’t need the approach of a Sith. He needed somebody who would show compassion and kindness. 

Zack had found out the captain of the guard was asking about his father, who was, as it turned out, somebody who’d supposedly died on duty at the very moon base that he wanted to infiltrate. The cause of death had, supposedly, been a Mandalorian attack. There were all sorts of horrible rumors that the Dyad were happy to let their soldiers perpetuate ABOUT Mandalorians, but above all that those people were violent, ruthless, wretched warmongering psychopaths that absolutely loved killing. 

But the odd thing was…no body. Nothing sent back for the captain of the guard. It was strange, to be sure. The young captain had been a dedicated man, as had his father, who’d gotten him that position. But the kid had certainly earned it, he’d gotten three commendations in this year ALONE for valor and merit. Darth Raize had personally pinned a medal to him at a ceremony. Why not get the body to him? They’d said it had been a horrible accident, sure. Blown up by a mine planted by the Mandalorians, sure. But surely there’d be something left. 

The real thing that made Zack suspicious was that barely any footage from the moon base ever got sent back to Nar Shadaa. If the news ever did reports on the base, there was something faintly odd, something…fishy…about the footage. But Zack couldn’t quite put his finger on what.

Omarosa, however, could.

“Look.” 

She and Zack had been going over the footage as they played on loops, one floating vid screen at a time and she pointed right at a spot on one of the vehicles. “Look. LOOK, right there. That speeder!” She said, focusing on the hover speeder that slowly whizzed by past several other vehicles. “Look, that speeder has a very faint marking. Looks like a yellow stain on the side? You look close and you can see it.”

“…yeah, yeah, I see it.” Zack peered close. “I’ve seen that same speeder pass by the window at least four times now. They’re…they’re looping footage! They’ve said this stuff is live, but they’re looping footage, CLEARLY.” He said. “But…no, it isn’t just that. Look at where that speeder is. The window. There’s…something wrong with the window…” He gazed even more closely, peering. You could just barely, BARELY tell but there was, indeed, a faint little haze you could scarcely make out on the edges of the window. “…is that a…yeah, they’re…they’re looping footage IN this footage! This is all like on some movie set! They’ve got a green screen thing going on!” He realized. “That window isn’t actually showing the outside! There’s a clear fake background there if you just look super closely!”

“I’m surprised none of the news reporters noticed this…” Omarosa murmured. “…then again, maybe they did…and got ‘taken care of’ when they brought it up. Wouldn’t put it past the Dyad.”

“We need to get hold of what’s ACTUALLY going on up there. If it was just boring moon rocks falling around the place or if things were actually good, they wouldn’t need to lie this badly about what it looks like up there.” Zack reasoned. “They must be hiding something awful if they have to take these steps.” 

Luckily, those codes they’d gotten for the base did, in fact, get them in. And it got better. Over 70 percent of people reused passwords for personal accounts. They’d tested the passcode to the moonbase and, sure enough, that code of “19465” was used for more than just the front door to the base. It was the code to get into the security rooms, the locker rooms, even the bathrooms. Which helped a lot! All they had to do was sneak in after grabbing a couple guards out for a walk around the base, taking their uniforms and their identification after doing a quick bit of work to fiddle with their ID badges.

“I cannot believe they haven’t fixed this yet!” One of the guards was angrily kicking at a vending machine, his friend standing next to him as Zack and Omarosa walked down the hall, approaching them. “It’s been two days and we can’t get a droid repair team up to fix the vending machines?”

“They’re still trying to get all the blood stains from out of the trash compactor after that incident yesterday…” 

“Hey, we can help.” Zack offered as he approached the vending machine and then began to kick it, secretly manifesting his Force powers. The powerful pull of the Force worked, and PA-POP! A candy bar was freed, sliding down a tube for the guard to collect his treat in the dispenser. “How’s that?”

“Thanks! I’ve been really wanting a Choco-Blast Bar.” He said.

“How bad was the incident in the trash compactor?” Zack asked, trying to sound as confused as possible. “I mean, it couldn’t have been THAT bad, right? I know the guys like to exaggerate about-”

“No, it was that bad. You can ask Sal in the security office to show you. Say Thomasin sent you.” The avian-esque guard who had been chatting with the human guard said, looking very pale, blue eyes widening. “It was horrible. Some callous jerk pushed Mr. Wuhd’fall down the trash compactor! It was disgusting. Evidently they got into an argument over the Mandalorians.”  

“Oh, wow. You don’t say?” Omarosa inquired, waggling her eyebrows up and down. 

Needless TO say, when they got shown the footage…it was just as bad as they’d been told. Omarosa and Zack had brought hidden cameras to hide on their persons to record all they saw on the base, and they had not only seen there weren’t ANY Mandalorians kept prisoner, there hadn’t been a Mandalorian attack there in…well…as long as anybody could remember! And quite a few of the workers at the moon base were getting really tired of continuing to lie to the public of Nar Shadaa about what was actually going on up at the Moon Base. They were sick of the theater.

But only Mr. Wuhd’fall had been the one to openly complain about it, as they told his son, Junior, and showed him the footage they’d recorded. “See, this is him complaining to the head of the base’s outer perimeter defense. The guy got a little nasty, he was like that, a nasty sort…” Sal, the security office worker, told Zack and Omarosa on the footage. “And he shoves Sal right into the trash compactor and then just took off! Now, the problem is, he did it JUST as the compactor was turning on! We couldn’t stop it in time, I’d gone off to take a leak, by the time I saw the footage here, the thing was already squeezing-”

“PLEASE shut it off.” 

Zack and Junior had said the exact same thing at the exact same time. They didn’t need to see any more. It was horrible and foul enough. Omarosa shut the little recorder off and Zack gently turned to Junior, who was looking down at the beer on the table in front of him, the three of them sitting in a back room in that familiar bar, both Zack and Omarosa in their “bum” disguises. 

“…I’m so sorry.” Zack quietly said. “The truth can hurt. But lies are much worse.”

“…why would they lie about this? I don’t get it. I…I just don’t get it…” Junior murmured as he gripped the table, fingernails digging in.

“It would make them look bad if they admitted that some lout on their defense force did it. Better to blame it on the Mandalorians. They always blame everything on them up there.” Zack insisted. “The Dyad have been blaming them for years and years without ever taking responsibility for their own people’s failures and screw-ups…or their outright cruelty.” 

“We’re not saying WE’RE great either. But at least we’re gonna be honest with you about what we want. We want the Dyad taken down. Are you going to help us?” Omarosa asked.

Junior took hold of the Medal of Valor he’d been personally given by Darth Raize, torn it off and then tossed it with a THWUNK into the nearby recycling bin. The Dyad wouldn’t know until it was too late, but a REBEL…had been born. 

[cotarded]

house of leaves is like. blah blah blah blabbity blah a made up quote from a made up academic that throws your entire life upside down for a few minutes. blah blah