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#best christian sites
anushaarticles · 10 months
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What does it mean to be The Virtuous Woman? In this article, we see the characterstics of Virtous woman explained in brief. Stay tuned for more…
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scarletackrmn · 2 months
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I think about the time @devine-fem gaslit someone that Jay Nakamura is actually Jason Todd and with Jon. Literally at least once a week that shit lives rent free in my head.
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i'm reading an article on the history of fandom culture and it's SO fascinating. i kind of feel like writing an essay about this
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kotori-mochi · 8 months
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Can't afford art school?
After seeing post like this 👇
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And this gem 👇
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As well as countless of others from the AI generator community. Just talking about how "inaccessible art" is, I decided why not show how wrong these guys are while also helping anyone who actually wants to learn.
Here is the first one ART TEACHERS! There are plenty online and in places like youtube.
📺Here is my list:
Proko (Free, mostly teaches anatomy and how to draw people. But does have art talks and teaches the basics.)
Marc Brunet (Free but he does have other classes for a cheap price. Use to work for Blizzard and teaches you everything)
Aaron Rutten (free, tips about art, talks about art programs and the best products for digital art)
BoroCG (free, teaches a verity of art mediums from 3D modeling to digital painting. As well as some tips that can be used across styles)
Jesse J. Jones (free, talks about animating)
Jesus Conde (free, teaches digital painting and has classes in Spanish)
Mohammed Agbadi (free, he gives some advice in some videos and talks about art)
Ross Draws (free, he does have other classes for a good price. Mostly teaching character designs and simple backgrounds.)
SamDoesArts (free, gives good advice and critiques)
Drawfee Show (free, they do give some good advice and great inspiration)
The Art of Aaron Blaise ( useful tips for digital art and animation. Was an animator for Disney. Mostly nature art)
Bobby Chiu ( useful tips and interviews with artist who are in the industry or making a living as artist)
Sinix Design (has some tips on drawing people)
Winged canvas (art school for free on a verity of mediums)
Bob Ross (just a good time, learn how to paint, as well as how too relax when doing art. "there are no mistakes only happy accidents", this channel also provides tips from another artist)
Scott Christian Sava (Inspiration and provides tips and advice)
Pikat (art advice and critiques)
Drawbox (a suggested cheap online art school, made of a community of artist)
Skillshare (A cheap learning site that has art classes ranging from traditional to digital. As well as Animation and tutorials on art programs. All under one price, in the USA it's around $34 a month)
Human anatomy for artist (not a video or teacher but the site is full of awesome refs to practice and get better at anatomy)
Second part BOOKS, I have collected some books that have helped me and might help others.
📚Here is my list:
The "how to draw manga" series produced by Graphic-sha. These are for manga artist but they give great advice and information.
"Creating characters with personality" by Tom Bancroft. A great book that can help not just people who draw cartoons but also realistic ones. As it helps you with facial ques and how to make a character interesting.
"Albinus on anatomy" by Robert Beverly Hale and Terence Coyle. Great book to help someone learn basic anatomy.
"Artistic Anatomy" by Dr. Paul Richer and Robert Beverly Hale. A good book if you want to go further in-depth with anatomy.
"Directing the story" by Francis Glebas. A good book if you want to Story board or make comics.
"Animal Anatomy for Artists" by Eliot Goldfinger. A good book for if you want to draw animals or creatures.
"Constructive Anatomy: with almost 500 illustrations" by George B. Bridgman. A great book to help you block out shadows in your figures and see them in a more 3 diamantine way.
"Dynamic Anatomy: Revised and expand" by Burne Hogarth. A book that shows how to block out shapes and easily understand what you are looking out. When it comes to human subjects.
"An Atlas of animal anatomy for artist" by W. Ellenberger and H. Dittrich and H. Baum. This is another good one for people who want to draw animals or creatures.
Etherington Brothers, they make books and have a free blog with art tips.
📝As for Supplies, I recommend starting out cheap, buying Pencils and art paper at dollar tree or 5 below. If you want to go fancy Michaels is always a good place for traditional supplies. They also get in some good sales and discounts. For digital art, I recommend not starting with a screen art drawing tablet as they are usually more expensive.
For the Best art Tablet I recommend either Xp-pen, Bamboo or Huion. Some can range from about 40$ to the thousands.
💻As for art programs here is a list of Free to pay.
Clip Studio paint ( you can choose to pay once or sub and get updates. Galaxy, Windows, macOS, iPad, iPhone, Android, or Chromebook device. )
Procreate ( pay once for $9.99 usd, IPAD & IPHONE ONLY)
Blender (for 3D modules/sculpting, animation and more. Free)
PaintTool SAI (pay but has a 31 day free trail)
Krita (Free)
mypaint (free)
FireAlpaca (free)
Aseprite ($19.99 usd but has a free trail, for pixel art Windows & macOS)
Drawpile (free and for if you want to draw with others)
IbisPaint (free, phone app ONLY)
Medibang (free, IPAD, Android and PC)
NOTE: Some of these can work on almost any computer like Clip and Sai but others will require a bit stronger computer like Blender. Please check their sites for if your computer is compatible.
So do with this information as you will but as you can tell there are ways to learn how to become an artist, without breaking the bank. The only thing that might be stopping YOU from using any of these things, is YOU.
I have made time to learn to draw and many artist have too. Either in-between working two jobs or taking care of your family and a job or regular school and chores. YOU just have to take the time or use some time management, it really doesn't take long to practice for like an hour or less. YOU also don't have to do it every day, just once or three times a week is fine.
Hope this was helpful and have a great day.
"also apologies for any spelling or grammar errors, I have Dyslexia and it makes my brain go XP when it comes to speech or writing"
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starry-teacup · 3 months
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the classic christian purpose of everyone's life is to love and to glorify god
and god is widely viewed as male
you a guy? kinda gay. what are you loving and glorifying? Other men?
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12344arkmatrimony · 1 year
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Ark Matrimony | There is always a rainbow waiting Every user registered on Ark Matrimonial is verified via photo and mobile phone so you don’t have to worry how real or fake anyone is.. https://arkmatrimony.in
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fullhalalalchemist · 1 year
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🚨🚨CONGRESS SECRETLY TRYING TO SNEAK IN EARN IT ACT COPYCAT INTO MUST PASS SPENDING BILL (PLEASE READ EXTREMELY IMPORTANT)
July 20, 2023 Congress is right now determining what is included in a must pass spending bill the NDAA. Often congress will sneakily add as amendments their bills that they can't pass in a normal setting.
If you remember, I made a previous post about EARN IT being reintroduced here.
The EARN IT Act and it's copycats are bipartisan bills that will greatly censor if not completely eliminate encryption and anything sexual and LGBTQ+ from the internet, globally. Anything the far-right doesn't like will be completely gone. The best way to stop them is to use https://www.badinternetbills.com/ to call your senators.
Following it's initial introduction earlier this year was massive opposition from human rights, LGBT, tech, political groups, and grassroots groups. Bc of this, the senators decided to remake the bill but give it a new name, so they can still pass Earn It without actually passing Earn It. Those bills are the Stop CSAM Act (yes really, they actually named it that), and the Cooper-Davis act.
The entire point of these bills is to mass surveil and censor everyone and I don't know why more people or senators speak out against it. There is a direct timeline from when the Attorney General Barr (under Trump) said he wanted to do this to it's initial introduction in 2019, and how the senators explicitly knew they couldn't actually say that so they lied and said it was about "stopping CSAM" or "stopping drugs" for Cooper-Davis Act.
These bills essentially do the following:
they gut encryption, the one thing actually protects you from having your data seen by anyone. Do you want republicans to know you're trans? that someone had an abortion? that they spoke out against the govt? to see your private photos you have uploaded to the cloud? to see what porn you watch? if youre a journalist, or an abuse survivor, any hacker or abuser can see your stuff and track you.
they gut parts of Section 230, the one thing that allows anyone to post online and birthed social media. Previous gutting into 230 gave us the tumblr nsfw ban and killed that site.
they create an unelected commission with some already established govt body (DOJ, FTC, etc) that will include law enforcement and people from NCOSE or other Christian conservative groups who will decide what is and isn't lawful to say. no citizen can vote who's on this commission, and the president gets to pick. it's like the supreme court, but for the internet.
lead to mass censorship and surveillance because of the above
We have until the end of the month to stop this, but this can be added literally any moment until then. It's literally code red. If this is added it goes into effect immediately. The BEST way to stop this is to drive calls and emails to the senate. https://www.badinternetbills.com/ connects you directly to your members of congress & gives you a call script.
It is ESSENTIAL to call the Senate leaders who can stop this. Here's a more precise call script you can use: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1huD5Ldd1lPTECYTEb9Gg2ZzrqW6Y9tryHT-MdjOl8kY/edit
All these people expressed concern over Earn It, so we need to press them hard to not allow it's copycats Cooper-Davis or Stop CSAM into the NDAA. This is URGENT and needs all hands on deck. Chuck Schumer (D-NY) (202) 224-6542 Maria Cantwell (D-WA) (202) 224-3441 Jon Ossof (D-GA) (202)-224-3521 Alex Padilla (D-CA) (202) 224-3553 Cory Booker (D-NJ) (202) 224-3224 Mike Lee (R-UT) (202) 224-5444
Please please please spread this message and blow up their phones.
TLDR; The Senate is trying to quietly push the Earn It Act's copycat bills into the must pass NDAA, which will lead to mass censorship and surveillance online by gutting Section 230 which is the entire reason you can even be on tumblr and why the internet exists, killing encryption which put everyone's lives in danger, and appointing far-right people to a supreme court-esque commission that the president has direct control over. They could be added in ANY DAY and we need to push hard to stop it before it gets to that point. CALL YOUR SENATORS **NOW** BY USING https://www.badinternetbills.com/ AND CALL THE SENATE LEADERSHIP AND SPREAD THE WORD!!!!
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pursuedating1 · 1 year
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Looking for The Best Dating Site | Christian Dating Sites
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While unsurprising, the rhetoric being spewed by Louisiana's lawmakers is fucking terrifying to me.
I feel so lucky that I was raised by a bunch of atheist because honestly I managed to go the majority of my childhood happy, without being shamed or acquiring a persecution complex...but now looking out at the current climate we live in...damn, they really hate us, don't they? I mean "godless" is one of the main insults getting thrown around on most campaign trails, which isn't new it just hurts.
I feel like I am a bad person because I only just found out about what's going on in Louisiana.
Sorry, just screaming into the void a bit. I hope you have a good day
For anyone who's not aware, Louisiana just passed a law requiring every single public classroom in the state, from kindergarten to college, to display the Ten Commandments.
Unfortunately, this is just the latest in the rapidly-escalating war between Christofascists and secularism. Multiple states have proposed this law, Louisiana is just the first to actually pass it. Oklahoma's Department of Education is claiming that they're going to force teachers to start teaching from the Bible. Seven states have passed laws requiring schools to display "In God We Trust" signs.
Here's the thing I think a lot of people on this site are too young to remember or weren't involved enough in religious politics to notice, and the reason the "edgy atheist who just hates religion" stereotype has gained so much traction on here: The New Atheist movement was very much a response to constant barrages of shit like this. Getting America to be even as secular as it is has been a constant struggle. Conservatives have been openly blaming atheists for school shootings, mass murders, and serial killers for decades. People who stand up and try to get religion taken out of schools and government immediately become targets for massive hate and harassment campaigns. People - conservatives and liberals alike - react with hatred and anger whenever someone stands up to get religion out of places where it doesn't belong. I think the past fifteen years or so have gotten a lot of people believing that separation of church and state is an obviously "safe" position that almost everyone is in favor of, but it very much is not and never has been.
I believe that conservatives are going to try to use the current Supreme Court to essentially abolish the separation of church and state, largely because many of them are openly stating their intent to do so. Louisiana is already being sued about this - if it makes its way to the Supreme Court, I think there's a decent chance of the current court ruling in favor of Louisiana, which is going to unleash the floodgates of Christian propaganda in public schools. It is frankly a dire situation, so I'm sorry if you were here looking for reassurance lol.
As always, the best action I can recommend is to get involved. You're definitely not a bad person for not knowing about this! But if you want to stay on top of religious news, I recommend the Friendly Atheist blog. The Freedom From Religion Foundation fights to get laws like this taken down. You can check your local city for secular humanist meetups. You don't want to burn out or enter a doom spiral by only ever dwelling on bad news, but I find that having people to talk to or action you can take is a good way to ward off despair.
And please, please, vote. Vote in federal and state elections, vote in your local city council elections, vote in your school board elections. A LOT of this is happening at local levels, and being involved in your local politics is possibly the most effective thing you can do!
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ftmtftm · 8 months
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Feminism has always, always had a history with Racism and White Supremacy - particularly in a way that promotes fascist leaning "Protection for Me and Mine" type "activism".
There have always been several Upper Class, White, Women at the helm of Feminist movements and it is something Poor, Working Class, Women of Color have been vocally criticizing since the First Wave.
I mean, US Americans, did you not learn about Sojourner Truth? Have you not read "Ain't I A Woman?"? It is one of the most famous early accounts of the racialized nature of gender. It perfectly highlights the way the social aspects of gender have always been barred from People of Color in a way they aren't barred from White People in a firsthand historical account.
Women's Suffrage, and subsequently the First Wave of Feminism was an actively Racially Segregated movement. White Suffragettes intentionally campaigned for themselves and themselves only because they thought that campaigning for Black, Immigrant, and Indigenous Women would undermine their own movement. They did not seek liberation for women, they sought the Systemic, Institutional Power of their White Male Peers and they got it - by intentionally leaving Women of Color behind them.
This is most evident in the fact that White Women received the right to vote in 1920, but Black Women did not receive the right to vote until 1965 with the Voting Rights Act. Almost 50 years later. That is over half a lifetime. This was also only approximately 2-3 years before Radical Feminism and the Second Wave began around 1967~1968.
If you think racial segregation and racism in the Feminist Movement ended with Black Women's suffrage and completely dissipated within the two years it took for the Second Wave to pick up it's feet, you are naïve at best and actively racist yourself at worst. The Women's Liberation Movement / Radical Feminism have always been White Woman's movements riding the coattails of the Suffragette's racism.
Look at the website for the Women's Liberation Front. WoLF is one of the original Radical Feminist organizations. It was founded in the late 60's and is one of the largest Radfem organizations to date. Now. Look at their board. Look at the photos of women they choose to include across their site. Look at the women who are speaking at their events. Beyond one or two token Black Women, it is a sea of Whiteness.
You know who is a special advisor to WoLF and the founder of the group "Standing for Women"? Kellie-Jay Keen-Minshull, aka Posie Parker. Kellie-Jay is the woman who popularized "Woman means adult human female" as an anti-trans slogan. Kellie-Jay is also real good buddies with - you guessed it! Neo-Nazis and White Supremacists!
WoLF also takes money from the Alliance Defending Freedom, (ADF) a Right Wing Christian Organization, and it's members have worked directly with the Heritage Foundation, a Conservative organization founded during the Reagan Presidency.
Radical Feminism as a political movement cares about the lives and held power of White Women under the guise of "Women's Liberation" in the exact same way as their foremothers, the Suffragettes. It's a foundationally White Supremacist movement. Black Feminists, Indigenous Feminists, Immigrant Feminists, and Colonized Feminists have been talking about this for over a century but it falls on White ears so why would they listen.
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sneakerhomie · 2 years
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SNEAKERHOMIE exists for the love of fashion. We believe in empowering individuality. Our mission is to be the global supplier with luxury rep products and best price. Found in 5 years, SNEAKERHOMIE has come a long way to provide for our precious customers all over the world, to help them to be more fashionable and more confident. We have built our trust, our reputation with you immediately from your first order.
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anushaarticles · 10 months
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This is the very rare topic we find in the Holy Bible. God wanted us to be Salt of the earth always. Like salt which is presesrvative and endures.
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stil-lindigo · 5 months
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Hello, very confused and overwhelmed outsider here. Looking at posts here and on news sites I see such pradoxical views, one saying to not support Palestine is to support genocide and the other saying to not support Israel is to be antisemitic. I wonder, and I am going around asking people on different sides of the war, do you believe it is possible to support both the lives of Palestinian people and the lives of Jewish people?
Feel free to ignore this ask or to point out any ignorance on my part. I hope you have some peace in your day/night, I can only imagine how stressful it is to have so many people asking so many serious questions.
hi anon. I’m gonna try to make this is as concise as possible, since I’m technically writing this on my lunch break. Yes, it is possible and in fact very easy to support the lives of Palestinian and Jewish people because - and this is the important part - Israel and Zionism is not Judaism. Depending on who you may ask, Zionism began as a pure-hearted desire for Jewish people post-WW2 to create a place that would always unequivocally be safe for Jews, but as I am not Jewish myself I feel like any description I might give comes off as insincere and not fully grasping the scope of that mission. But no matter what Zionism once was, it is now the belief that Jewish people have the right to commit genocide against indigenous population so that they can establish their ethno-state. And you can split hairs all you like, but after the past four months, my belief in that has only solidified.
Perhaps the strongest opposition to Israel comes from Jewish people themselves, who’ve popularized “not in my name” as a protest chant. Holocaust survivors have come out in droves to protest the actions of Israel, and they’re often the strongest front of any protest action since - yes, you’re right - mainstream news is very committed to selling the idea that this “war” is Jews vs Muslims which is just inflammatory racist garbage. There’s more to it than I can easily get into right now, but just for a start, it completely erases the existence of Palestinian Jews or Palestinian Christians, and also ignores Israel’s historically abusive and degrading treatment of their own Holocaust survivors in their population.
This “war” is not a war. It’s a genocide, where the total amount of bombs dropped on Gaza is officially over twice the impact of a nuclear bomb. One side is asking for a stop the fighting, for aid to be allowed through, they are asking for clean water and food as their women have been forced to rip off scraps off tents to use as menstrual products. One side has had all 35 their hospitals bombed (a war-crime the first time, and it continues to be a war crime every time it still happens), over 100 of their journalists have been targeted and murdered (more journalists than were killed in all of WW2, and btw this is also a war crime). And the other side films TikTok’s levelling apartment buildings, looting houses, kicking Palestinian hostages, stripping them naked and urinating on them. Israel has rained white phosphorus down on Palestine, they have bombed Palestine indiscriminately, they have destroyed archives, historical locations, they have done their best to rob Palestinians of their dignity and empathy and still, they’re not done.
Oh and the excuse that they’re just doing all of this to save the hostages? Hamas offered them all back in exchange for a ceasefire. And the Israeli prime minister, Netanyahu, said no.
In the future, try to get your news from trusted news sources like Al Jazeera, and following journalists on the ground like Bisan and Motaz.
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phaedraismyusername · 9 months
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Happy International Lesbian Day! Here's some super brief book recs to celebrate
Books dealing with love, loss, longing and abandonment
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This is How You Lose The Time War is a short but beautifully written epistolary novel between two agents on opposite sides of a time war as they slowly fall in love.
Our Wives Under the Sea is one of the most beautifully written debuts I've ever read about a woman whose wife comes home wrong after they thought she'd died at sea and how it feels to grieve the loss of someone who's still in your home.
Lucky Red is a western novel about a young girl working in a brothel who meets her first female gunslinger and falls head over heels for her, and the consequences that come with loving dangerous people.
Body horror galore
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Camp Damascus is about a young woman living in a super conservative christian town built around the worlds most successful conversion camp and the horrors that are uncovered there when praying the gay away fails.
To Be Devoured is about a woman whose fascination with the local vultures turns into obsession and the urge to know what carrion tastes like overtakes her life and leads her down stranger and stranger paths.
Chlorine is about a girl whose entire life revolves around being a competitive swimmer, and how abuse, neglect, and obsession with being the best takes its toll on the young women caught up in these destructive cycles.
Flawed character studies
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Big Swiss is about a woman who has a kitchen floor reset in her 40s, moves away and starts a new life as a transcriber for a sex therapist and becomes obsessed with one of his clients before inserting herself into this poor woman's life.
The Seep is a speculative sci-fi set in a future where there's been a quiet alien invasion that has given people the ability to make almost any changes to their own bodies and what that world feels like to someone who doesn't want to partake.
Milk Fed is about a woman in therapy who feels cut off from almost everything until she meets another woman who triggers in her a melding of sex, hunger, and religion and where that takes her. Huge trigger warnings for ED content. It gets tough, y'all.
Fantastical wlw books
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Bitterthorn is an amalgamation of fairytales retold as a slow burn sapphic love story between a sad young girl from a cursed land and the evil witch who takes her as a companion in the latest of the generational sacrifices made to appease her.
All the Bad Apples may be set in contemporary Ireland but it is a fairytale following a young girl as she travels across the country looking for a sister she refuses to believe is dead and the people she meets along the way.
Gideon the Ninth needs no introduction on this site but for the sake of formatting - lesbian necromancers in space who find themselves in an isolated murder mystery plot. It's not a romance but it is a love story and this series will change your life if you let it.
Translated novels
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Boulder is a short character study following a free spirited woman when she accidentally settles down with the woman she loves and how love and resentment can take up the same space in your chest when life doesn't turn out the way you hoped it would.
Notes of a Crocodile is a cult classic coming of age story about queer teens in Taipei in the 1980s. It was written in the 90s so please keep that in mind if you choose to read it.
Paradise Rot is about an international student studying in Australia and her growing obsession with her housemate as they share a space that allows no privacy. I've never read anything that feels stickier.
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psychotrenny · 2 months
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I just can't get over the whole obsession with "Kremlin Bots/Psyops" like do these people realise how fucking stupid they sound? Like they are so insanely parochial, so hopelessly indoctrinated into the principles of the US American Civil Religion, that they just refuse fathom anyone having a moral and rational reason to oppose their nation and its institutions. Like debating over the minor stuff is normal and the sign that you're an intelligent and free thinker, but the second the criticisms start hitting a little too hard then clearly you have to be some malevolent foreign agent who has been paid or created purely to lead good americans astray. Like you can really smell the cultural Christianity because it's literally no different from all the preachers who denounce any opponents of Christian supremacy as agents of Satan himself. It's just a dumb trick to protect your brain from uncomfortable thoughts about the beliefs you hold and the systems you support and the implications this has to your personal sense of moral superiority.
And ironically enough, repeating this stupid cliche in fact makes you sound like some sort of robot or some agent of the US state. But although US government does indeed make use of bots to spread propaganda on social media, on a site like tumblr the vast majority of accounts saying this sort of thing are very much real; they just belong to chauvinist and willingly ignorant liberals who've taken it upon themselves to do that work for free. It would be nice if they found another hobby though; even if you love the US empire you have to admit that this sort of thing is never very convincing. Sometimes they're funny, mostly they're annoying, but I think it would be in everyone's best interest if all the "vote blue" drones just shut the fuck up
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billthedrake · 4 months
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ACCOUNTABILITY (PART ONE)
Story idea generously provided by @talesfromunderthemattress.
Jim McCready didn't like starting his work day at 6:00, but he'd been dedicated to his CrossFit routine, and the flex schedule allowed him to carve out a couple of hours in the middle of the day. Besides, he realized he could bang out most of his work emails pretty quickly first thing in the day, as he had his coffee, without the distractions of the office or some "crucial" issue coming up.
He was in the middle of one of those emails when a light knock came from the direction of his office door.
His eldest son, Ryan, stood there, tall and bed-headed, wearing just a pair of gym shorts and one of his dad's beat-up hand-me-down Auburn fraternity T-shirts that had become his favorite. Ryan was a football jock, a senior in high school now, and Jim was impressed at how much his kid was filling out that old T.
"Hey Dad," Ry said, his voice still thick with his morning grogginess. Even Ryan's voice had gotten deeper over the last few months, a reminder to Jim that his boy would be off to college very soon.
Jim pushed his chair back. He was already in his business casual for the office, khakis, loafers, button-down, quarter-zip sweater, and the cross necklace barely visible beneath the unbuttoned top of his shirt.
"Hey buddy, what's up?" he asked. When he was younger he used to chastise any of his four kids when they interrupted him at work. But a church seminar on spiritually guided parenting made him shift his focus, to put family first.
Ryan got a shy grin. "I just wanted to be honest with you... and I guess you're gonna realize pretty soon, if you haven't already..."
Two and two clicked for the middle-aged father. "Oh," he said. "I take it you're talking about the app?"
The nervous smile got a lot more nervous. "Yes, sir," his son answered. "I had a weak moment this morning.... you know..." The football tight end shuffled on his feet a little.
His father wasn't exactly happy. He'd convinced Ryan to install the accountability app on his phone. Covenant Watch. It pinged Jim anytime Ryan looked at a porn site or material flagged as sexual. Jim had even set up the same, installing Covenant Watch on his phone. Becoming accountability buddies with his son in the goal of a purer lifestyle. James McCready believed in practicing what he preached.
He'd only received two pings from the app before. Once was a mis-coded site, not porn. The other was a slip up. He and Ryan had a heart-to-heart talk about it, about temptation. And then they prayed. That was four months ago.
Something felt different now, but Jim couldn't put his finger on it. "Anything you need to talk about, buddy?"
Ryan laughed. "No, sir, I'm good. I mean... I'll do better. I promise."
Jim nodded. He believed his son. Ryan was a good kid. Good student, great athlete, devout Christian, head of his FCA chapter at school. And yet, this was Ryan's second accountability slip up.
"All right," the dad replied. "And Ry... thanks for being honest with me, buddy."
Ryan nodded. Maybe more chastised than his easygoing teen demeanor let on. "That's what accountability buddies are for, right, Dad?" He gave his father a longer look, then said, "Well, I'll let you get back to work, sir."
***
It was three days later. Ryan had fifth period free as a study period, with an arrangement to help out Coach Mitchell. Today he was actually studying for his AP biology test while Coach did some paperwork.
The phone buzzed in his pocket. He almost expected it was his best friend Braden Whitmore, but the dude had already gotten detention once for using his phone during Mrs. Clemens class, and even a dumb jock like Whitmore knew not to be that stupid to tempt a second infraction.
It was a banner notification from Covenant Watch. James McCready, 8 flagged sites, 14 flagged pages.
Ryan's heart beat excitedly. As he pulled up the accountability report, his suspicions were confirmed. Dad was looking up the videos Ryan had jacked off to Monday morning. Figures he would, the football jock reasoned. That's what accountability was about. If he didn't want his Dad to know he was watching porn, Ryan knew he shouldn't watch the stuff to begin with.
But Ryan had only watched a couple of videos in his moment of hormonal weakness. It had been a really great stroke session. While the church didn't have a problem with masturbation, their teachings made pornography the forbidden fruit. Just watch those videos of young jocks fucking some hot college chick was enough to make Ryan's palm feel extra amazing.
His teen dick was boning up fast now, and he placed the Bio book on his lap to hide his hardon from Coach, who was engrossed his work anyway. Taking one good look to make sure it was OK to pull it up, Ryan scrolled through the full Convenant Accountability Report.
His father had first watched the ones Ryan had, but then continued to watch more of the Hot Guys Fuck videos on PornHub. Like five of them.
"Hey Coach," Ryan spoke up. "Mind if I find the restroom?" Mitchell wasn't as strict in study period as some teachers, but safer to ask.
"Yep, McCready... you know where it is."
Ryan tried to play it cool, but it was like he couldn't get to that men's room stall fast enough. He shut the door and took his perch on the toilet seat and unzipped. Ryan pulled out his phone and ear buds. Helpfully, Covenant Watch had a link to the offending site, so it took just seconds to pull it up. He almost wasn't even thinking that Dad would be aware he watched it. Ryan just needed to see.
It was a hot one all right. The dude was jacked in that collegiate jock way. HUGE dick, too, thick and veiny.
At times like this the football player was glad his father had left his foreskin intact. Slowly, Ryan worked his shaft with his bare fist as he watched part of one video, then another. Then another. All with the same model/star. Dad clearly was into this stud, and the idea made Ryan's balls twitch with excitement. His hunk of a father had undoubtedly jerked off to the very thing Ryan was watching now.... tugging at that nice long Dad cock, working out a heavy, manly load... And then in the middle of the video a second buff dude entered the scene and started tonguing the dude's balls along with the chick.
Ryan was coming, blasting hard. Cum splattered on the tile floor in front of him, and the rest dribbled down his first.
"Fuck!" he hissed then caught himself, glad no one else was in the restroom during the middle of fifth period. Hurriedly, he cleaned up and flushed the tissue paper down the toilet. The video was still running and Ryan was about to shut it off, when it occurred to him that his Dad would know he watched it. He knew he could in a pinch pass it off as being an accountability buddy, just seeing what Dad had clicked on. His Dad probably wasn't dumb, but it's not like his old man hadn't done that to him.
But, fuck, a part of Ryan didn't want to get off easy. He clicked on the "Bisexual" tag and scrolled till he found a hot looking one. Then hit play. He didn't even need to let the whole thing run. He had to get back to Coach Mitchell's office pronto, anyway. But this would be enough. His Dad would know.
Ryan shut the video and stuffed his phone and earbuds back in his pocket. He washed up and made his way back. Now he was trying to play it cool in a different way, trying to calm his breathing and hoping that he hadn't totally fucked up.
***
Jim could barely look Ryan in the eye that evening. The father could not believe he'd been so incredibly weak that afternoon, but it had been a slow day at the office, and just, well... he was horny as fuck. He'd actually jerked off on Tuesday just looking at the names of the websites Ryan had watched. That's before the guilt had sunk in. He should be leading his son away from sin, in Christian stewardship.
Then that afternoon guilt gave way to horniness. He'd watched more. And not even thirty minutes later, Covenant Watch was sending its accountability report.
The thing that had caught him off guard now was that Ryan was doing his best to act cool. Jim knew his son was nervous as fuck, as nervous as he was, but every body language signal his son sent out over dinner or as he helped his Dad cleanup and do dishes was "it's cool, Dad."
The tension was still thick as they were alone in the kitchen. Ryan broke the spell, leaning in to whisper, "You mad at me, Dad?"
Jim shook his head. For all the emotions he was feeling he wasn't upset at Ryan. He had to wonder why he wasn't. "No..." he replied back in an equally soft whisper. "It's just we shouldn't have done it."
Ryan gave a grin, though it was more of a supportive one than a cocky one. Jim never felt as much as he did now that his eldest was all grown up, 18, fully sexual. "I know, Dad... it's just... knowing you were looking at those sites, too..." He didn't finish his thoughts be he didn't have to.
"Not my proudest moment," Jim said. "This stays between us?" He KNEW he shouldn't be asking his son to cover for his own shortcomings as a man and a father. Accountability had become conspiracy. But he also knew he didn't want Kelly knowing what he'd done. He'd rather lose face with Ryan than that.
"Course, Dad," Ryan said. "I guess that means I'm not grounded or anything..." OK, now that cocky smirk was there.
Jim had to laugh. "Nah, kiddo, you're not grounded."
The conversation had cleared the air a lot. Jim felt better, and as he got ready for bed that evening, he reflected that his own lack of conjugal connection with his wife had put him in the mindset where he'd stray. Not that he was blaming Kelly for any of his shortcomings. But the idea of the no-porn pledge was to channel his male desires into marriage.
But Kelly rebuffed his attempt to initiate sex that night. Any other night, it would have felt normal. Marriage was a partnership and both people had to want sex. That night, though, it was like Jim McCready was looking for a lifeline. Looking for his wife to save him from more debased desires.
Those desires came hard and heavy, as the father tried unsuccessfully to fall asleep. They continued even as he finally entered his deep REM sleep. And they were there when he woke up at 5 in the morning, rock hard as he'd ever been.
Jim lay awake thinking about the bisexual scene and how he wanted to watch more... how he got excited by the two guys kissing, or one dude sucking the other one. This wasn't the first time in his life that he'd had gay fantasies, but they seemed surprisingly strong now.
He looked over the clock. Earlier than he got up, but not too early, he decided. He slipped out of the bed and found some sweats to put on. He went to start the pot of coffee and then made his way to his home office and shut the door.
Last night everything had seemed clear in his head. He'd implied to Ryan that they'd stop this escalation. Only this morning, he was horny as fuck. Moreover, the more he replayed last night's conversation with Ry, the last he was convinced that his son saw it as a stop to things.
Already, Jim was pulling up Pornhub on his phone. With his heart beating, he clicked on the "Straight" selection on top and changed it to "Gay." The algorithm did the rest. The page filled with thumbnails of hot, muscled collegiate-jock looking guys. Handsome, clean-cut. Jim turned down the volume on the phone and pressed play for one...
***
Ryan woke up and when he looked at his phone there was a Convenant Watch notification. 27 forbidden sites accessed.
"Dad, you naughty fucker," he said aloud as he sat up in bed and looked at the full report. Already he was pulling down his briefs and taking his morning wood in hand.
***
Jim was a little disappointed that Ryan only watched one of the videos. Then he started getting freaked out. Maybe the gay video was a step too far. They'd shared some bi-ones, but this was different. As he got dressed for work after showering, his whole body shook. What if Ryan wasn't gonna keep this between them? If his son told anyone, Jim was royally and truly fucked.
But as he walked into the kitchen, everything was normal. His family was there eating breakfast. Ryan had gone through a phase of skipping breakfast or maybe just grabbing a breakfast bar, but now he was working out a lot and had football, and the kid now was eating nonstop.
"Morning, Dad," his daughter Olivia said as Jim came in and poured his second cup of coffee for the morning.
"Hey Princess," he winked, then Kelly greeted him, but mostly laid out the plan for shuttling the kids from practice that afternoon. Her bossy planning mode used to annoy the hell out of Jim, but now he appreciated how his wife kept it all running. They had four amazing children, who were growing up fast.
Some faster than others, Jim thought with a gulp as he looked over at Ryan, scarfing down eggs, sausage, and toast. At least the kid wasn't giving him the silent treatment or even seemed bothered.
It out the door time, now. Kelly took the two youngest, Sara and Mitchell, while Ryan would drive Olivia to the high school they both attended. Jim went to his office to retrieve his hard drive and papers to take in. He took one final check around to make sure he'd cleaned up the cum from earlier. It had been a big load, for sure.
He heard a knock.
"Hey Dad." It was Ryan's voice. Quiet, almost as his son stepped in and shut the door softly behind him. "Just wanna say, sir, you have good taste." Ryan had his normal polite kid demeanor, but that smirk coming back.
That caught Jim off guard. Ry's words but more than that his nonchalant approach. "Yeah, buddy?"
Ryan nodded, like he was getting turned on a little just talking to his father like this. "Oh yeah... I mean, I couldn't make it through one before losing it." His eyes locked with Jim's for a second. It turned the father on, and yet he also felt the earth was opening beneath him. Swallowing him to Hell. "Anyway... catch you later."
"Yeah," Jim croaked in reply. Mad that he couldn't be the responsible dad. Mad that he was letting his libido drive things. "Have a good day, son."
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