#benefit of keeping things short is that the post doesn't get too long

[writingquestionsanswered]

Not to be a downer, but I actually finished my novel and now I’m confused because I don’t want to publish it. I don’t even particularly want anyone other than maybe my two close friends to even read it. What on Earth did I write 40k words (which I know is not really long enough for a novel, but it’s still far and away the longest thing I’ve ever written) for? I know people say “write for yourself” but like… am I just wasting my time? Help?

(p.s. you can leave this off anon)

(p.p.s your blog is really great 👍)

There's No Such Thing as Wasted Writing

I'm going to tackle this two ways...

#1 - "Write For Yourself" - there's a reason this common phrase has echoed through the Hall of Writers since time immemorial. It's because it's true! Writing doesn't have to be anything more than a pastime. It doesn't have to be anything more than something you do for your own benefit and enjoyment.

I have an in-joke with family members about how any time one of us does something the least bit crafty, DIY, skilled, whatever, a particular family member will always say, "You did a great job! You should do it for a living!" Like, someone can't even crochet a Kawaii mushroom without being pressured to turn it into an Etsy dynasty, or paint a cabinet without being pressured to become the next Property Brothers. And that's such a BANANAS capitalistic mindset, isn't it? This idea that nothing can be done purely for our own enjoyment. That you can't just write a novel because you want to... you can only write it if you plan to share it or publish it? It's just so silly.

And, the thing is, we don't even apply that mentality to a lot of other things people do purely for enjoyment. No one is streaming all of Bridgerton in two nights and saying, "I enjoyed every second of that, but why did I do that? Such a waste of time!" No one spends an hour strumming their guitar under the stars on a beach, and then says, "That was so relaxing and fun, but I didn't charge for that performance and I didn't record it to sell it, so that was obviously a waste of time."

You know what I mean?

#2 - And Anyway, Practice Makes Perfect - And if you keep writing--even if you continue not to share or publish--you'll get better and better with each story you write. Which, maybe all that means is you get to appreciate your own improvement, but also, should you ever change your mind and decide to write something to share or publish, you've now spent time honing your skills. Even if those other stories never see the light of day, they're still an important foundation of the writer you become. Do you know how many unpublished novellas, novels, and short stories I have? Too many to count. Hundreds of fan-fiction and original fiction short stories I've only shared with one or two other people, if anyone. A dozen or so novels and novellas that have only been read by a few people, and some haven't been read by anyone else or have only been read by my CPs. I would never consider those stories and novels and novellas to be a waste of time, because I know every single one made me a better writer. My published work is better because I wrote those other things.

So, I hope that makes you feel better. At the very least you hopefully enjoyed writing your novel--or at least got something out of it--and you definitely honed your writing skills, which matters! ♥

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I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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[ancientnapdragon]

First Post | Second Post

My last set of ramblings I left off on a loose cliffhanger... which will stay that way! I kinda wanted to pull apart the Food Peak itself and how it functions/how they actually Cultivate there! It seems like a fun exercise on developing the world this AU takes place in c: Maybe a few ship crumbs in there, but since I DO love to yap, expand that read more at your own risk! Hehe!

Food Cultivation is, on the surface, exactly what it sounds like. You eat stuff and it helps fortify your body, soul, and strengthens your Core! Not just ANYTHING works, though, and it's more than just finding a Chicken Faced Serpent's liver and choking it down.

Food Cultivation is seen as a super easy way to Cultivate, maybe even scorned a little bit, and can be indulged in by people who don't even usually Cultivate that way. But, it's almost impossible to get to a Golden Core stage without a LOT of money or a LOT of knowledge/work. One of those low basis to learn, high skill ceiling sorta things. Usually, the only people outside of Sects who get to that stage are very very wealthy Nobles; and even then, they're not really strong.

Food Cultivators don't need a lot of Qi or natural talent to start cultivating. The techniques that are taught specifically on CQ are all about strict control. You use what Qi you have in a very precise way to make little shields, blades, to enhance certain parts of your body, or occasionally heat or cool things. It's short, controlled bursts. Most of the really good 'talent' goes to the 'higher' Peaks so they've really gotta master what they've been given on the Food Peak.

With Food Cultivation, you can't just eat your way to success even if that's what it might sound like so far. You need to keep your body strong and master various skills before you can even hope to learn to channel Qi into them to improve them. You still need to meditate and put in the elbow grease to get you anywhere worth being.

Food Cultivation expects you to eat a lot of different things. Not everything you eat will help you grow your spirit. Plus, you can only eat the same thing so many times before it doesn't really do anything for you. Spiritual Foods, when eaten on the regular, have diminishing returns. You get a super strong Flower and eat it; the first time is a nice boost, the second time is just ok, the third isn't much, any time after that would be wasted on you, ect ect. The best that eating that flower would do for you after you've got all the 'boosts' is just helping replenish your Qi if you're low. Since you can only eat stuff a few times before it stops boosting you, it becomes sort of like a puzzle. Say you got a Strawberry and it boosted you by '20 Points' (which is probably what the System would tell SY). Then you got a piece of cheese and it boosted you by 20 points. If you cooked them together, you would get-! 15 points total! That's less than just eating them! BUT, if you dipped that Strawberry in Chocolate (20 Points, too), you might get 50 points! More than both! So, you can either eat things as they are or try and experiment and get even more of a benefit! But, you'd also have to think about stuff like cooking techniques, how long until the thing you want to eat goes bad, plus all this other stuff which can make the Boost you get higher or lower. If you just chew through everything that crosses your path, your Cultivation will suffer! You have to plan ahead on top of getting really lucky with the more rare stuff!

On the Peak itself, younger and newer disciples are given basic reading, writing, arithmetic, and basic cooking classes. The cooking classes teach basic skills like how to hold your knives properly and how to care for them, some easy recipes, ect ect! All disciples have, also, their basic Peak upkeep chores like laundry, cleaning, and lots and lots and LOTS of scrubbing.

After you've proven yourself capable enough to not slice your fingers off or set (too many) fires, disciples are expected to head down the mountain into the nearby city and set up what is basically a food kitchen. It's used to help cement basic fundamental skills! After all, you get really good at chopping something up if it's all you do for like 4 hours and slightly under duress. Usually the newer disciples handle the basic prepwork while a few of the more advanced ones will actually cook. This is overseen by a few seniors who make sure everything goes smoothly and who actually hand out the food! (I imagine that the Qian Cao ALSO do something similar nearby, except for healing. They get free food in exchange for helping out any unfortunate accidents!)

As for the more senior disciples, I think they have a few more intensive duties! Other than the Head, there are at least eleven more 'upper' Seniors. Each of these Seniors is the head chef for each of the other Peaks. When you're at a high enough skill to not fuck it up, you get rotated to act as a Chef under these Seniors at each Peak; Each Peak has their own food needs, after all! (Side note: around this time is also when you would be expected to get your Spiritual Sword) For Seniors who aren't the 'Head Peak's Chef', though, there is a secondary duty- but I gotta explain that giant pot of soup I briefly mentioned in the first post.

That Giant Cauldron of Soup is, like, more important to the Food Peak than anything else. It's some special kind of spiritual metal that the OG Founder worked to craft and stands over this massive fire pit that is constantly burning. It's HUGE, with a whole facility like half built over and around it; gotta keep the rain and snow out of the SOUP. I love stuff like Hunter's Stews and stuff like that, so this is basically what this is- this pot of soup has been stirred and tended since the OG Peak Lord first lit it. Part of a senior disciples duties is to keep the soup topped up, tasting good, and filled with stuff to help fortify your Qi.

The Soup is a huge cultural thing on the Peak. You're expected to have a giant bowl of it, with sides, every morning- even the Peak Lord. The stuff in it helps to strengthen the new/weaker disciples as well as fortify anyone older. It's a Qi superfood, even with dimishing returns. It's usually only allowed to be eaten by people on the Food Peak, though; only in emergencies will people off-Peak get any. Even the Sect Leader doesn't have the right to demand any. (SY is going to of course try and sneak some to his fussy boyfriend) Okay, so we got all that, but what about SY's obsession with the recipes that the System keeps teasing him with? Well, part of your study on the Food Peak isn't just learning to cook or even the spiritual food dance- you're training to be become a skilled chef. There is a lot of study to master the recipes from the Food Peak itself, but the disciples are also tasked with learning as much as they can and try to develop their own recipes. The skills overlap; you never know when learning to make the perfect Scrambled Egg will allow you to maximize some weird spiritual ingredient you found.

Other than non-spiritual food and The Soup, disciples are encouraged to do a lot of their Food Cultivation on their own. They are encouraged to go on Night Hunts with other Peaks for the chances to gain stuff for their own Cultivation. The Bai Zhan kids only care if they slayed the beast, so go ahead and grab it's heart for yourself, ect ect. You can, of course, trade stuff around or sell it at your leisure. Whatever will get you more gains! It's seen as either really stupid or flat out courtship to offer someone else your spiritual food you make, especially if you can still make use of it yourself. This is something that will 10000% go RIGHT over SY's head when he starts to offer stuff to SJ. They'll be about 18/19 at that point, so everyone from SY's peak will squint when they realize what he's doing. (Even though I have some Evil Plans for after they all become Peak Lords, I think that SJ would still be really welcome on the Food Peak despite how everyone else looks down on him. Everyone there 'knew' that SY was 'sweet on him' kinda thing. They don't believe that SJ is the reason SY.... hehe :) )

taps chin. okay, i thiiiiink that is enough yapping about that for now? I wanna write up a brief lil thing about how SY would be around the other Future Peak Disciples, as well as how his relationship with SJ will eventually complicate things. I know that SQH would figure out SOMETHING was up with SY when he was suddenly served, like, a blueberry waffle. But that's for another post!!! AS ALWAYS ty for reading my ramblings. I'm very slowly working on getting a more strict outline up and ready for the fic I would really like this to be. I'm a menace to myself and others, so it will be a slow burn and I'm dragging you all down with me. >:)

[lady-raziel]

long reaction to the update

ok. so they put out an update video! since i've been commentating for the last three days i might as well subject you all to more of my thoughts today.

main takeaway: this was a good apology video. i mean it. short and to the point, no overproduction, heartfelt and honest (and not a ukelele to be seen. thank god.) they took ownership of the situation, apologized, and restated how much they value their relationship with the fandom.

their solution is to make the watcher tv platform into kind of an iteration of patreon where content is available for early access before it is released onto youtube later. this is clearly a better option than paywalling everything for everyone. i'm not sure what the relative breakdown of costs turns out to be when you compare how much they were making on patreon after the platform took their cut VS how much it costs in overhead to run and maintain their own platform (how much it costs annually to contract via Vimeo, essentially). but i'm sure that's part of the calculation.

all things considered, that does seem like the best option out of all the alternatives. it allows them to not completely abandon any of the pans they have simmering over the fire for the time being. i don't think i ever thought they were going to just say "oops, forget about the streaming thing! let's pretend that never happened!" because at this point they've invested quite a lot of time and money into it, and i don't disagree that keeping it in some iteration may help them make up some of the funds they're lacking.

i would say, it's fine to keep the streamer. this is one of the ok outcomes, all things considered-- but if they're going to do it, they've GOT to do it smart from this point forward. listen to both the fans and the consultants intimately. both are going to have valid points, and both are going to be right. listening to too much of either side will sink this thing because each has motives and expertise that the other doesn't. if the fans say $6 is too much, listen to them-- but have conversations with business consultants about how much you realistically need to charge to make things work.

also, i'd use this whole situation as a learning experience. watcher is a young company, and it's literally inevitable that mistakes will happen. what's different is that the watcher crew haven't really been in a position before where they've been on the receiving end of the internet-angry-justice-hammer to this extent. it's one thing to watch it happen to others, but it's a position of extreme privilege (and a bit of hubris) to think "but that won't happen to me, because i'm built different." naw, man-- two things in life are inevitable: death and fuckups. the callout posts get us all in the end.

what's really important is that they use this as a wakeup call that even the most loyal fandoms will only follow you so far to the cliff's edge, and you don't want to push that. you have to strike a balance between the passion projects that you think are worthy and the stuff that maybe doesn't excite you as much anymore but the people want to see. a little fanservice keeps the lights on, as unfair as that might seem. i'm gonna make 50 markiplier choccy milk memes just so i can make one niche political joke once and a while for 6 likes. it is what it is.

i'd also use this as a chance to take a very careful look at company structure and finances. it's not fun to do and nobody likes it. trust me-- this is hard whether you're a single adult trying to pay the bills or the freaking US government (speaking from experience on both-- i have to read the president's budget for work frequently). but you all have to ask hard questions about the ratio of creative staff you take on VS staff for administrative and other business roles, as well as the costs and benefits of everything you spend money on. how many staff members are essential to location shoots? can this video be shot with 2 cameras instead of 3 and thus you don't need another cameraperson? you might even have to come to the decision that instead of pitching a new show it makes more sense to use those funds to hire your essential non-creative roles or contract firms or freelancers.

paying staff a fair wage with benefits speaks highly of what watcher wants their values to be. it's hard to find such a position in a creative role and still actually get to work on things you care about. but it would be much worse if watcher didn't make realistic decisions about finances and it lead to the death of the company and everyone losing their jobs. the whole watcher company can work, in my opinion, but not without some sacrifices. they're going to have to run it more like a business and less like a youtube-channel-turned-business in the future if they want to survive.

last thing i'll add is that while i do think this was a good apology video, i still think they hurt themselves by not putting out some sort of statement on Friday or Saturday just to say that they were formulating a response. As i've said in other posts, it's ok and in fact beneficial to not make a kneejerk reaction, but it's also very important to communicate that you SEE what's happening. you SEE what people are saying and THAT'S why you need more time to respond. saying nothing and leaving the angry public to wonder if you dropped your phone off the Hoover Dam or just don't care? that's a fumble. it's a common mistake companies make in a crisis, but that doesn't mean it doesn't erode trust fast.

this could have been handled better in many ways. we see that, and i'm glad watcher says they see that too. crucial going forward is taking all this and patching the errors that caused all this to fall apart and learning from the experience.

tbh at this point what i'm most sad about is that the watcher crew have probably been too stressed out and upset to appreciate some of the absolute bangers people have been laying down to clown on them. i think if it wasn't about them they might be touched by the collective attitude and creative spirit. /j

[olisephart]

Short ezkayn comic loosely inspired by the song "Figure you out" by VOÍLA. God they live rent free in my brain.

Details on the backstory and the comic under the cut <3

Starting pre-relationship, heartsteel is established. Ezreal and Kayn have been heavily flirting (maybe even friends w benefits) for months already, but always danced around actually saying anything. Both are too prideful to make the first step, because it's one thing to flirt or (want to) hook up and a whole other thing to admit you have actual romantic feelings for your friend/band member/prank partner.

After an Incident (whatever it was) that made Ezreal uncomfortably aware that he's In Love, he tries to distance himself from their usual flirtatious banter and starts publicly dating/fooling around with another guy; to distract himself from Kayn, to prove to himself he doesn't need Kayn, and though he wouldn't admit it, to make Kayn jealous.

Predictably, Kayn does get jealous but holds his tongue for a surprisingly long time, since voicing his jealousy risks showing his feelings go deeper than physical. Still, he can only take so many obviously staged pictures of Ezreal Definitely being Super Happy and Not At All Faking it with another guy before he confronts him. He swallows his pride and corners Ez, which is where the comic starts.

I didn't feel like writing dialogue, so here's the gist of what I was envisioning. Kayn confronts Ezreal, telling him to drop the sharade with the other guy. It's Obvious he's not genuine with it, the guy bought him (insert thing that Kayn Knows Ez doesn't like as much as another thing; ice cream flavour, flowers, what have you) which Ez would usually scoff at. Because it's Kayn, he can't help but tease with smth like "Just admit you like me and spare us this performance".

Ezreal, defensive, starts denying everything Kayn said, insisting he's dating the guy for real and bc he likes him, and Kayn's ego is just too big etc etc. Unfortunately for him tho, he's been missing Kayn a whole lot, so having grabbed Kayn's wrist, he can't help himself but caress it with his thumb. He stops himself the moment the realized, but Kayn noticed as well and takes that as the sign he needs that Ez is full of shit.

He pins Ezreal's hand above his head and starts teasing him in earnest. Listing all the little tics he noticed about Ezreal, embarrassing things he likes that no one outside of Heartsteel (or maybe even just Kayn, since he's paying extra close attention to Ezreal) ever gets to see, how easy it is to get him hot and bothered and how cute he is when he's flustered like this. He keeps going until Ezreal, overwhelmed with this barrage of confusing emotions (Kayn is paying attention to him, he remembers what he likes and dislikes, he just confirmed all his teasing are On Purpose to fluster him-), decides to bring it back to familiar ground. He grabs his jacket, pulls him close and tells him to shut up.

If they have hooked up before, Kayn knows what comes after he says "make me" - the kiss is expected but simultaneously way more emotionally charged than ever before, because they have essentially both admitted their feelings. Post comic, they make out/hook up and then confirm it in actual words. They like each other, theyre going to be exclusive (bc I love them being possesive over each other) 

If they haven't hooked up before: Ezreal would usually find a comical way to shut Kayn up once he says "make me" - be that smothering him with a nearby couch pillow, pulling the leash on his stage outfit, etc. Kayn feels the electricity between them but this hasn't happened before. He leans in and says "make me", but he leaves the ball in Ez's court. Once Ez grabs the back of his head to pull him closer, Kayn shifts his other hand to hold onto his waist in turn.

[cleonwritingchallenge]

Q: Who can join these writing challenges?

A: Anyone can! No sign up or permission is necessary. And you can join at any time, no need to start at the first prompt.

Q: What tag(s) should I be using?

A: Use #cleonchallenge and any other tags you would normally use.

Q: How long can these fics be?

A: Unless otherwise stated in the prompt(s), they can be as long or as short as you want! Keep in mind new prompts come out weekly so please pace yourself and don't feel obligated to write lengthy epics. Seriously, even 100 words or less is perfectly fine!

Q: Is NSFW allowed?

A: Yes! Just make sure everything is properly tagged and everything involves adults.

Q: Is there an ao3 collection that these can be posted to? And is it required?

A: There is a Cleon Writing Challenge collection maintained by ShortAttentionSpanFics that is available to be used but it is not required to add them there if you do not wish to (or you forget lol).

Q: Can I use AI to write these?

A: No. I'll skin you alive if you do.

Q: How do the "Fill-In-The-Blank Title" challenges work?

A: I'll give you something like "Leon and Claire go ____" and you just need to think up a word or words to finish the title. For this example it could be something like "Leon and Claire go to the beach" or "Leon and Claire go home" and then you take that title and create a short fic from that while using the now complete title.

Q: What about the Quotes/Scenarios Challenges?

A: The scenarios ones are probably pretty self explanatory. Just make a fic based on a basic scenario with everything else left up to you. For the Quotes challenge you just need one character in the fic to say the given quote, doesn't have to be Leon or Claire. Again, everything else is left up to you.

Q: Are the bonus challenges required?

A: Nope! Purely optional.

Q: What is that "Round 1" and "Week 1" thing on the prompt?

A: That is mostly for my benefit in keeping things organized. Each "Round" consists of 12 weeks as that is how many unique combinations of Main challenge and Bonus challenge there are before they repeat (ex. Scenarios/Location, Quotes/Object, Scenarios/Word Count and so on). This is all just to make sure I don't start repeating it too early. You can also use this to specify which prompt you're using but it's not at all required.

Q: I like the prompt but I'm not really feeling it for Leon and Claire. Is it ok if I use it for a different pairing/fandom?

A: Sure, I don't mind. Just don't use the Cleon specific tags or add them to the ao3 collection when you post it. Maybe just mention where the prompt came from if anything.

Q: I like a prompt but it was posted months ago. Can I still use it?

A: Yes! These prompts don't have an expiration date. New ones are just added weekly. If anything just specify what prompt is being used in your notes/summary. Or use the "Round/Week" thing mentioned above.

Q: Can I use these prompts for a longer/multi chapter fic?

A: Sure!

Q: I don't write but one of the prompts inspired me to create fan art. Can I still use the #cleonchallenge tag?

A: Absolutely!

Q: I have a fun idea for a prompt. Can I suggest it to you?

A: Sure, just send it to my Ask box. Keep in mind that prompts are scheduled months in advance so it might take a while to get to your suggestion. I'm also not always logged into this account so it might take a while for me to notice the Ask. But please still send them in!

Q: I don't know if I can keep up with writing a fic every week. Will you hate me for skipping prompts? :(

A: Nobody will hate you for skipping prompts. These are just for fun and you should never pressure yourself to complete them if you're not feeling up to it. <3

Q: Where should I be posting my fics?

A: I would prefer ao3 but honestly feel free to post them wherever is most convenient for you.

Q: I have a question that I don't see in the FAQ. What do?!

A: Send any questions to my Ask box or DM me directly. Again, remember that I'm not always on this account so answers might be delayed.

[saintmeghanmarkle]

Meghan Markle is a Bully and the Proof is in the Office by u/sdowney64

Meghan Markle is a Bully and the Proof is in the Office This started as a comment on another Reddit post about Meghan Markle’s charity “work” in Canada as she popped in on yet another women’s charity that was a clapback to the Royals and specifically works to combat woman harmed by “colonialism.” 🙄 The post discussed how those organizations ruin themselves by aligning with a bully. I made a long comment but several people noted I should make it a separate post, so I am doing that here. Unfortunately I can’t link to the original subreddit post. I've said this before but I really think it needs to be said again. I am a retired auditor. I worked for an Inspector General & before that a DoD contract auditor for a total of 14 years. One thing I learned working both those jobs is when you have significant staff losses in short amounts of time, you have a toxic bully boss at the helm, 100% of the time. I also learned it in my own office, and it's why I left DoD and took a lateral transfer to the IG at a different agency. Let me repeat that: 100% of the time.In all my years of auditing, when there was a significant staff loss of 10 or more staff in less than two years, there was never, ever, ever any other reason except a horrible toxic bully boss running the show. And when an organization ignores that bully boss and doesn't remove them, they will continue to get wave after wave of staff loss. Resignations & impulsive firings, but mainly resignations.And here is the other thing I learned, which makes that statistic so glaring. Employees will rarely leave a job they're happy with, even if someone offers them more money, better benefits, better commute, or even better quality of work/life balance. It's true. The majority of employees, if they are happy in their job, will pass up better options in a new job. But when an employee is miserable and being tortured in their job, they will leave that job for less pay, worse benefits, longer commute, and things that you would think they would never give up stable employment for.Because the bottom line is, the boss makes or breaks the environment. And that is why anyone who thinks there is any other reason that Meghan & Harry can't keep staff, they are absolutely lying to themselves. I've seen it too many times to count. And it stood the test -literal testing, evidence-based testing, interviewing employees who are living through it, interviewing people who left and were MORE THAN HAPPY to say in their exit interview WHY they were leaving and where they were going and how they'd accepted less just to get the hell out of there. That is the type of boss Meghan Markle is.And while I fault Harry for a lot of things these days, he was not the OG Bully. Before Meghan, he made coffee for his staff. She put a stop to that immediately. So he was happy to co-bully, but without Meghan, there would have been no bullying and no systemic toxicity. Harry is emotional and could be petulant and rash, but overall was decent and acceptable to work for and with. Once Meghan shows up, the whole dynamic changed. Anyone who pretends otherwise and thinks she's a role model and a good person is lying to themselves.The proof of who Meghan Markle is and how awful she is as a person is sitting front and center for all the world to see in her rapid and overwhelming staff losses. It was happening at the palace, and then the proof is at Archewell, that pattern continued! Same EXACT pattern. Talking to you, Tyler Perry, and every liberal organization I would have supported until you refused to look at facts and aligned with the monster that is Meghan Markle. post link: https://ift.tt/Ov6YbJn author: sdowney64 submitted: November 22, 2023 at 02:09PM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit

[nox-in-a-box]

Tell me all about Asher! Please 🥺

Wrote as much as was coming to mind. It's all under the cut because it's kind of long. Not too long though.

So. Asher.

He's a wizard who keeps to himself and hates people and attention. He spends much of his time cooped up in his house because he is just too tired to try and do stuff.

Now when it comes to his job, on paper he has a pretty good record, but he's actually just good at covering up his messes. He's prone to doing committing magical crimes, but nothing too serious. Just stuff like turning people into cats and such...it's all fueled by emotion though. It's not like he goes around just turning people into things for his own benefit or something (at least, not until he takes on Connor as a student).

He has wings, by the way! Large amounts of magic will irreversibly alter you, and there is this ceremony for wizards who have finished their training satisfactorily where as a final test, they'll attempt to do this really special spell that gives them bird wings. If they survive. The bird in question tends to be different for each person and no one is really sure why but they assume it just depends on personality. Asher has pigeon wings. He uses a spell to hide them from sight most of the time, though. Attracts less attention.

Some more personal details...

He likes pastries and desserts with fruits in them (this one is really just because I like those too).

Where does he live? Well, there is this coastal town with short cliffs right next to it. He lives in a large house on those cliffs. It's not his house, he lives with his elderly aunt. And has been. For years.

His parents were killed by a group of vampires when he was a teen, leaving just him and his little sister. But soon after that happened, he and his sister were attacked by the same group of vampires. He managed to escape, but his sister was left behind. He kind of blames himself for her death because he just fled instead of trying to save her.

After that whole thing, he developed an intense fear of vampires in general. His silver coin earrings? They're supposed to be to try and ward them off. He also tries not to go out after the sun sets, stuff like that...

(I actually think about a little alternate scenario sometimes where his girlfriend is secretly a vampire. It's fun to think about, but I don't know if I would make part of the canonical events.)

Eventually Asher finds out that Connor is Nora's younger brother and he kind of just...bribes Connor to help him out a bit, like by telling him what kind of things Nora likes and such. Connor obliges...reluctantly. (I would get into more detail here especially with Connor and Nora's relationship but this post is not about them. So. Yeah!)

Oh yeah! His girlfriend! Her name is Nora and she's Connor's older sister. He originally doesn't actually know this, and he just has the biggest crush on her (and she likes him too).

(You're wondering how they meet if Asher is such a shut-in. Well. He needs to go out sometimes.)

Okay so the stuff after this is more so...just things I wanna do with his character but there isn't any proper events there. Honestly this post is a great opportunity for me since I get to write all the stuff I've kept mostly in my head. Even if I'm still kind of confused right now as to what I should write and what I shouldn't...

So um.

I want Asher and Connor to have a kind of brotherly relationship. Even before Nora's existence, I just felt like Connor had annoying little brother energy.

I also want Asher to deal with his fear of vampires somehow. Not sure how. I have a funny option in my head where he walks into the headquarters for that same damn group of vampires...but that would just make him worse and not better.

Also! I want Asher to be a bit more rebellious against the law (he already is a little bit, yes, but there could always be a bit more there). This change would of course be catalysed by Connor.

Okay that's it. I cannot think of more to write at the moment. Thanks for the ask, Shy!

[terarria-sunflower]

very un-fire emblem, but since ao3 is down here's some L death note headcanons I was debating posting, hopefully they will benefit the masses in this time of hardship

L and how he thinks about romance:

(tw for slight sexual references and short icky behavior from an unnamed non-canon character but no non con, could be dub con)

- he had a couple puppy loves when he was a kid that he fell way too deep into and had break his heart. he just had trouble understanding the natural flow of relationships, and his standing with others who expected him to keep up with them, so he kept getting left behind

- he's obviously bisexual

- and i think he had a brief thing with another boy when he was an early teen and living at the orphanage

- probably the kind of thing where he felt like he had found his soul mate, and they spent lots of time together trying to make up for how starved for love their lives had been at Whammy's, and then eventually the other boy started to become disgusted with the system, and with L because he was so integral to it the older he got, and neither of them understood any of that, and the other boy broke up with him very unkindly and vanished all in the span of about a week

- L is a little wiser to what was going on behind the scenes now, but even if he had the full explanation, the pain was just so acute, and echoed his recurring experience with abandonment so that thinking about it just solidifies a belief that he's unlovable

- i think when he got into his later teens at the orphanage and started to have a bit of freedom to wander around unsupervised, he also had a brief relationship with an American girl who was on vacation in the area

- and by brief i mean the literal one week that she was in Britain

- she was a bit older than him, almost enough to be icky and certainly old enough to know better than to play with an obviously vulnerable young boy

- she was bored and on vacation so she decided to use him, and again he was totally smitten, poor thing was still just so desperate for companionship that he didn't question a good thing

- he is a genius, but his emotional intelligence just developed slowly cause of trauma:/

- she manipulated him into being physical with her the day before she went home in an alley near the orphanage. they didn't have penetrative sex but they got pretty well acquainted

- she left him immediately after and didn't come back to say goodbye.

- that experience was where his trust allowance ran out, and a few years later after he and Watari began moving around the world, the time and the physical separation from where he grew up helped him understand not to blame himself

- it's actually really lucky that he became a career law enforcer, because it gave him the needed exposure to how much other people straight up suck, and saved him from a lifetime of self-hatred

- his theme is really being self sustainable

- he doesn't have any qualms about his personal worth

- but he also doesn't think he's good enough for other people, so he's learned to live totally without them

- Watari is the exception, because L knows that their relationship is based on Watari needing him for his talent, and he can know quantifiably that he's good enough for that

- i think romance is something he craves even if the lack of it doesn't torture him, but he is truly and literally waiting for the stars to align in the person he chooses; it's something he will never take a risk on again (cough why I'm anti-Lawlight although no disrespect to the ship or it's shippers at all it's just not for me!)

- attraction is easy! he just doesn't trust it a bit.

- his end-game would have to be someone who's known him and Watari for quite a while, who Watari likes, and who has stayed around long enough that their only possible motivation for wanting him can be- well, wanting him

- but once he's found the right one, and he's safe with them, I think he'd be eager to participate in surprisingly traditional romantic gestures, and a good communicator.

- he's awkward as we know, but when comfortable with the person he loves, i think that awkwardness turns into endearing, just non-current mannerisms. like, he's a big kiss his partner's hand kinda guy, which isn't that weird or outdated really but he does it with the intent and reverence with which a knight kisses the hand of a court lady, and he does it because he's gathered his most complete pictures of romance from books and from old movies that i'm sure Watari has made him watch

- 10/10, perfect baby angel of a man, the geneva war crimes are a part of him and I'VE decided they're funny

[fuckingfinwions]

hallo your au has inspired me to write a short fic of my own c: it's sort of fluff of geode au fingon/sold as pet maedhros. can i have your permission to post this on ao3 at some point?

-

"You want to what?" Fingolfin stared at his eldest as if he grew a second head, momentarily untangling his fingers from Maedhros' curls.

"I– I said I want to marry Maedhros," Fingon repeated.

"That's... Fingon are you– Why??"

A good question. Fingon didn't really know why. He barely understood his growing feelings for Maedhros let alone considered marrying him. He always thought he'd marry someone from a more respectable family not the biggest whore in all of Arda, but the sight of his father's hands all over the elf who showed him so much trust and love in the past few weeks urged a sense of chivalry in Fingon that he thought he was no longer capable of.

"Why does anyone marry anyone? For love, of course."

"Not true, you could always marry someone for politics or even tax benefits. Marrying this harlot will only break your heart."

"Not as much you're breaking mine right now. Maitimo loves me father, if he didn't I think I'd have lived my days not thinking much of him either. But I find that I have become infatuated with him as of late and would like get to know him more outside the bonds of servitude."

Fingolfin studied him as Fingon steeled his gaze, Maedhros the only thing between them shaking like a leaf. He made little effort to stop the king's molestation but it was clear from Maitimo's big wet eyes he still wanted Fingon's approval first. It took all of Fingon not to run to him and embrace him and tell him everything would be okay.

"So be it."

Fingon sighed out air he didn't realize he was holding.

Fingolfin for his part was not entirely convinced of his son's declaration. Sure he has noticed Maedhros had been acting a little strange as of late and he did see the appeal in it but Fingon's attention never stayed in one place too long and he'd probably grow bored of Maedhros' shtick eventually. Fingolfin had other pretty Feanorians to fuck in the meantime.

Besides this might be an opportunity for his reckless son to learn a thing or two about responsibility.

"Try not to damage him Findekano." His father stood and brushed away the crease in his robes just as easily as he shoved Maitimo away. "If he is to be your betrothed I expect him to act like one. You'll feed him, wash him, and teach him all the ways of court. And since you're engaged people need to see that you're actually taking the whole thing seriously, so no fucking anyone else for at least a year. Am I clear?"

"Of course! I'll be the most well-behaved husband in all of Arda!" Fingon promised as Fingolfin left the two newly betrothed alone.

This is amazing! And yes, you can definitely post it on ao3, you wrote it! I'd appreciate it if you link either this blog or my ao3 (also called fuckingfinwions) as inspiring it, and also then I can stop by to leave a comment.

Fingon is so sweet, and yay for sticking up for Maedhros! Not actually consulting Maedhros as an equal partner, but maybe they'll get there in time. And Fingon obviously cares about what makes Maedhros happy, not just jealousy of other people using Maedhros.

Fingolfin doesn't believe that the wedding will actually take place, but I have faith in them! In other timelines Fingon is known for his faithfulness, and he's not going to drop Maedhros once he's made up his mind to keep him. And Maedhros is extremely devoted to Fingon, he's definitely going to be trying to make this engagement work. Maedhros isn't stupid either; he doesn't know how a prince is supposed to behave but he can learn, and if that's what his master fiance wants from him, he'll dedicate just as much energy as he does to any of Fingon's other orders.

(Also, was Fingolfin literally about to get a blowjob from Maedhros when Fingon "proposed"? Am I reading the "crease in his robes" and "untangling his fingers from Maedhros' curls" right? Because that sure is some timing on Fingon's part!)

[insipid-drivel]

SSI & SSDI: What are they, who qualifies, and how to apply?

Prefacing this with "For USAmericans only" because our system is a special kind of fucked up. I'm sorry to say that this may not apply to people that are undocumented, either. The feds suck that way and I really wish life was easier for all of us. This is also gonna be a very long post.

I see a lot of USAmerican tumblr users in dire straights trying to scrape by with art auctions, selling homemade stuff, or straight-up begging (no shame intended; poverty fucking sucks and our system is broken), that really seem to qualify for the same benefits that I have, but underutilize or otherwise don't know they can apply. This post is my attempt to explain the differences between our federal benefits programs, who can qualify, and what you need to do to apply in the gentlest, most hand-holding way I can for those of you feeling daunted or scared.

First off:

1: What's the difference between SSI and SSDI? SSI is short for "Social Security Income", and SSDI is just the same thing but with "Disability" thrown in. SSI pays into benefits for elder care and retired seniors, but what a lot of USAmericans don't realize is that you can apply for SSI at any time if you are disabled and have never had a job because of it. SSI isn't the same as a 401k or a retirement plan through your bank/finance manager. SSI is the federal system through which people who, either through age or disability, cannot work receive federal compensation through tax dollars. I got approved when I was 30 due to the severity of my disabilities when the average American doesn't usually have to worry about SSI until they're nearing retirement age. SSI is also the system that people who have never been able to work due to being disabled can apply for life-long benefits through.

SSDI is specifically for the benefit of people who have worked before, but have become too disabled to keep working for whatever reason. I'm personally, actually, on SSI because I've never been able to work due to my disabilities and have been living with them since very early childhood. I had odd jobs at stables working with horses in my teens, but no paystubs to prove it since it was all in cash. If you've never worked a formal job and are too disabled to work now, you want SSI. If you've been able to work before and can prove it through pay stubs/taxes/employment contracts but are now too disabled to, you want SSDI.

2: How do I know if I qualify? By getting tired of struggling to work because of your disability and giving the process a real look. Are you making less money than if you were working a barely minimum-wage part-time job and still struggling with Being Okay? Then you're probably, to some degree, legally disabled and entitled to help. The threshold to apply for assistance is surprisingly low considering how much I've seen barely-hanging-in-there tumblr users suffering from their respective chronic issues toughing it out with nothing but duct tape, ibuprofen, and etsy shops, and SS(D)I programs really take a lot of care to pay attention to your psychological welfare when you have to work as well as your physical welfare when defining what "disabled" really means.

You can even call the SSA help line, reach an agent, describe your situation, and ask if it sounds like you should pursue an application and how to start at absolutely no cost and with no commitment; these are programs you have a legal right to access and apply for, and calling is completely free - there are no consultation fees, ever. A lot of Social Security agents WANT to help people get on benefits when they need them, but it's actually harder to get approved if you try to do the entire process digitally vs. keeping in contact over the phone with a real human.

While you can apply and get approved with 0 contact necessary up until a certain point with applying for federal benefits, you are much more likely to get denied and have to appeal multiple times, miss documents that you didn't notice you needed to have ready, or not hear about other benefit programs or assistance that you can simultaneously be applying for. Even if you're scared of phones, you want a good agent to advocate for you and advise you when it comes to SSI/SSDI.

For the record, it's NORMAL to be denied at least once, if not several times when you apply, and does not mean that you aren't disabled, or aren't "disabled enough". This is a tactic intentionally used by the SSA to filter out those "truly" in need from those that aren't by using the logic "truly desperate people won't quit applying while people with options will". It's bullshit, classist, ableist, and takes advantage of people with anxiety and social phobias, but that's the way it's been built to be, so you MUST be persistent and keep appealing if you get denied. There are no limits to how many times you can appeal your case when it comes to SS(D)I. Some people can be stuck with being denied and appealing for years, which is why I strongly advise keeping the names and contact information of SSA agents and resources you've been in contact with for help. Once you get people to see you as a person rather than an applicant, you'll start getting a lot more good advice and tips for how to get approved faster and even how to maximize your monthly benefit rates.

If you're struggling to hold down your life in a stable way because of having one or more disabilities that interfere with a regular, "average" person's expected work day (9-5, usually commuting at least a little by car, usually working with other people/customers, spending at least some prolonged times on your feet or sitting at a desk/computer), you may already qualify for more benefits than you're aware of. There are absolutely no legal ramifications for applying for SSI or SSDI and getting turned down, or applying multiple times. It's not a "three strikes and you're out" kind of deal. You will not be arrested or fined for applying or inquiring about what you're entitled to from our federal government. Go to the official Social Security Administration website and poke around! However, my protip is to first read what benefits are available, and then CALL THEIR HELP LINE DIRECTLY to talk to an actual human being. The person who answers the phone can listen to you describe your circumstances precisely and guide you through applying, as well as inform you of any programs you may not know about that you can apply for simultaneously.

My SSA rep was a champion that got me through the process while also dropping hints about how to write and describe my situation in the forms I had to fill out. Because I live with my family, I don't have to pay rent, but my representative loudly asked, "YOU PAY RENT, RIGHT?" as a heavy-handed way of telling me, "I can get you more in your paycheck if you at least say you're paying rent," which got me an additional $300 added to my monthly checks now. I actually do pay that $300 in rent now, because it makes me feel better and helps my family with other expenses, including a brand-new not-even-on-the-market-yet power chair that my mom bought for me recently so I don't have to limp along with a cane anymore.

3: How do I apply?

Go to http://www.ssa.gov/ and research based upon your situation (if you've ever worked before or not). I got so overwhelmed by the online application process that my mom, who does bureaucracy for a living, helped relieve a load of anxiety from me by filling out my paperwork for me as well as she could (she's legally my Power of Attorney and so having her handle my paperwork was totally fine) and then calling their help-line.

Generally, the hardest part about applying is the waiting and resisting becoming discouraged, because Social Security is a slow ass process, and you're lucky if you hear back within several months of an application for an update, much less approval. However, depending on your situation, you may be required to go to an SSA-approved doctor or therapist to review your records and verify that you're still as disabled as you were when you first started your application as a last step before your application process is officially complete. For me, all I had to do was answer a therapist's questions about what my quality of life was like (my answer was "What quality of life?" because I was That Miserable), how my mobility was, how well I functioned around strangers and peers, what chronic pain/problems I dealt with, how long I could stand to be on my feet, and generally gave a rundown of what I could and couldn't handle about an "average" person's daily life and typical expected work load in your stereotypical office or retail setting.

The most important thing about applying is getting the application started as early as possible and making contact with an actual SSA representative! Even if you never follow through with applying (again, you are not penalized if you drop out! You can pick up where you left off or start completely over at any time when you're applying for federal benefits like SSI), after you reach a certain point in being Acknowledged By SSA As An Applicant For Assistance, the clock starts. Your clock starts - and I mean that in a very, very good way.

Once the SSA receives your initial request for SSI or SSDI, they automatically begin calculating any and all back-pay THEY owe YOU when you get approved as long as you're still applying and appealing. For me, my first SSI check came in at almost $6,000, because it took me around 10 months or so after my initial application to get approved, and the absolute basest rate for SSI benefits at that time was about $600/mo. I now make a little under $1k/mo with SSI alone, with my payments increasing automatically with inflation or if a single billionaire bothered to pay any taxes this year. If a major financial problem occurs in my life, like if my mom were to suddenly want more rent, I can report it to the SSA and they'll compensate me for at least some of that increased rent.

SSI/SSDI is not going to make you rich or solve all of your financial issues, and you are not legally allowed to work without special permission and circumstances while receiving benefits, but it can help take some of the pressure off if you literally have no other way of getting financial help. Because they're both federal programs, you're able to receive SSI/SSDI benefits along with many of your state's local benefit programs, like state-funded insurance, welfare, and food stamps to further stretch your budget and help you financially.

Little things that helped me along the way:

I cried a lot. At first it was humiliating to feel my emotions drop out from under me in the middle of a conversation with an SSA rep, but when he heard me beginning to lose it and sob at how hard everything is all the time, he became even more helpful with my case. He was a very sweet man named Dennis from Georgia. The same went with anyone else I had to see or speak to; if I just broke down crying and showed my actual feelings of resentment and humiliation at being so broken down and disabled that I officially needed Federal Government Daddy's money, they'd be a lot more compassionate and helpful. Show your emotions. Be upset. Let the people you speak to know that you feel like crap because, in spite of all your years of trying and trying to Be A Normal Person, things haven't gotten any better and maybe have even gotten worse.

I spoke my truth. I had a lot of suicidal ideology going on when I started applying, and as difficult and scary as it was, admitting that I was feeling like I had no other way out or way to help my family not be burdened by me was through suicide. I said that I would rather be talking to a doctor about assisted suicide than talking to the person I was talking to about asking for basic federal assistance. The therapist I said that to was alarmed and heartbroken that I preferred the thoughts of suicide to the thoughts of pursuing SSI, and was very, very quick to reassure me that I wasn't a failure, and that she was there to see me and help me get what I needed now that I was asking for it. She praised me for telling the truth and being brave enough to keep applying and trying.

I let myself be symptomatic. No masking, no pain meds, nothing; when I had to deal with people assessing me for SSI (which weren't many, but the stakes to me were too high to try to mask even once), I went in exhausted, in pain, stinking from not showering because I was struggling, rushing to and from the bathroom with stress IBS, and very vocally in favor of dying rather than continuing to fuss around with paperwork. When the exhaustion and fatigue made me want to cry, I cried. When someone wanted to touch me - like to take my blood pressure at the doctor's - I allowed myself to jolt away and need to be asked if it was okay before I was touched by anyone. I allowed my Neurotypical Tolerance Level to reach 0, and to be the goddamn mess I really was inside, and still am.

I did not express optimism or hope. I made it clear that I was going through the motions because I "knew I was going to get denied anyway". I knew most people never get approved, and I was honest that I knew it and expected nothing but wasted time while I went through the application process as one final attempt to not be such a hindrance to the people around me.

That following October, I got a snail-mail letter in my mailbox congratulating me for being approved for SSI, and that if I was reading the letter and had not received my first payments, I would after a short time and was asked to call them if I didn't. It took about 10 months total to get through all of it once my mom teamed up with me to help me with the Official Process, and checked my bank account to find not only my very first payment sitting in my checking account, but the past 10 months' worth of payments I would've received if I'd already been on benefits. I used it to decorate my bedroom, which was so spare and empty it looked like nobody lived there, get new clothes I desperately needed (I was 30 and still relying on hand-me-down clothes and underwear from when I was a teenager), started paying my mom rent so I felt less like a leech and more like an investor in our family home, and am now in the process of getting a brand new power wheelchair, because my problems with walking and standing were what got me to start applying, and life has gotten better enough that I can now afford the mobility aids I need.

[p1nkcanoe]

p1nk’s cowboy ghoul hc’s 🤠

yeehaw, let’s get it

wild west is probably a more fitting description, but mmmmm cowboys... ANYWAYS

!! mentions of blood, violence, injury, dishonorable and illegal activity, weapons...

swiss

every time I think of cowboy swiss I can’t get raven’s post out of my head. this man is adorned with gold and covered in tattoos--most of which are messy and self-done--and a sight to behold. he's all broad shoulders and a tiny waist, and sports the thickest, neatest mustache for miles. what exactly he does to make his money is a mystery. nobody really knows where he's from, or what he's about, but he tends to stick around town for days at a time before disappearing without a word, only to return days--maybe weeks--later and refusing to speak a word of his absence. he's known as a ghost to the locals, drifting in and out and working silently and without a trace of evidence for his story, and he likes it that way. swiss works for lots of people and also nobody at all. he's got connections all over the continent and is willing to carry out any task in return for a good check and a word with a wealthier man. he's got money buried underground in burlap sacks and old dynamite crates hidden in caves, evidence of his loyalty and unwavering reliability, and even though his hands are covered in blood he's carried onward by the mountains of honor on his shoulders.

aether

big boy’s the sheriff of a small town hidden around the bend of a river and guarded by hills and mountains. he’s a highly respected man, had gained his title and work through his high honor and kind heart, and he’s dedicated to keeping his people safe. he wears his big, golden star on his chest with great pride, but the sheriff's not as clean as he seems. he's got connections far outside of his station and dabbles in the very things that he locks "dirty criminals" up for. he's got a distribution agreement with cirrus and her moonshine monopoly, has sunshine as an acquaintance, keeps swiss sheltered, clean, and working for mutual benefit, and has dewdrop to complete the more dishonorable work that he can't complete himself. aether has a prideful reputation to uphold but he still sleeps with one eye open at night. nobody here is a saint.

dewdrop

dew’s aether’s right hand. he does all the dirty work- the things that aeth can’t do himself without risking his reputation. and he’s good at what he does. he’s silent, stealthy, and isn’t afraid to take an extra risk to finish what needs to be done. this kind of work comes with a price, though. dew’s done some things that he’ll never speak of, not even with aether, but as long as he sits down with him at the end of a long day and joins him for a beer they don't press too far into it. dew's quiet. he doesn't speak much but he has a temper that's unusually short and tends to get him into stupid barfights that he knows he won't walk away the winner from. sure, he's dispatched countless men, but he's still not the biggest guy in the bar... sometimes he feels like he needs a little pain for the things he's done; the things he's seen. an eye for an eye, as they say. it's the closest he'll get to experience peace of mind.

cumulus

cumulus is the daughter of a wealthy barkeep. her family has owned the tavern in town for generations and you can usually find her there, playing the piano and keeping drunken men entertained with her charm, pretty teeth, and big curly blonde hair. but don’t get it wrong—lus holds her own and she keeps both the regulars and the stragglers in line with nothing but her own two fists—and you better not get her daddy involved if you know what’s good for you. she may be a good girl in the books but she's got her own contracts behind the scenes. she's got a regular who comes in once every week or so and stocks their shelves with 'shine. as far as anyone is concerned, it's on request and with good word from the sheriff, but in reality she's managed to catch the eye of the best moonshiner in the state. sure, she completes the business end of the contract and makes sure the cabinets are full, but their personal affairs after hours are solely a business of their own.

sunshine

sunshine is a deadly motherfucker. she may not look like much but there's a saying that goes around that claims that she's never missed a shot. she runs around with a gang up in the hills and occasionally comes into town to visit the tavern and spend some coin in the shops (it's rumored that she's got a little something for the piano girl, but nobody's ever had the balls to ask around). she operates on her own time and by her own rules; no questions asked and no compromises. what she says, goes. and that's a threat. it's true that sometimes the sheriff's a little iffy about her presence, but she's assured him a million times that as long as he lets her slide by that she'll leave him alone. she's not usually one to make deals or partnerships outside her gang, but she is a woman of her promise and aeth has never put forth the idea of testing it. occasionally she'll roll in when swiss is in town and together they're a dangerous duo. that's what really scares the shit out of him. together they could take over the town in a heartbeat. but they wont. they're outlaws, not monsters.

mountain

mountain is a free spirit. he lives nowhere in particular, migrates from place to place with his camp on his back. he has a special bond with nature, enamored with the beauty of the earth, and he would much rather risk getting lost in the wilderness than to settle in even a tiny town. but every blue moon he'll wander in and say hello to familiar faces, sell some animal pelts and lost items for a few dollars, and spend a cozy night in the tavern--more than taken care of by morning. he's an interesting sight as well, choosing to wear handmade leather shoes over any nice pair of boots and sporting a hat made from a raccoon and possum pelt. he has excellent handiwork and if you ask nicely he might just bring you a little handmade article next time he visits (whenever that may be). "where you off to this time?" and "when'll you be back?" aeth will ask as he's loading up his horse again for the road, and mount always answers the exact same: "somewhere, and sometime. i'll tell you about it when I get back." aether always laughs, gives his horse a pat, and shakes his strong right hand. "just don't die out there," he says. "no promises."

cirrus

"what'd you bring me this time, pretty lady?" aether asks, lifting up the cloth concealing two dozen liquor jugs, maybe more. a thick stack of cash is handed over with his other hand. "only the best." cirrus is a moonshiner and she’s got her hand on the best product for a thousand miles in every direction. she built her business from the ground up, a careful process of trial and error, and eventually distilled her final product with her own careful hands. her shine burns like fire and goes down like candy on your tongue. it's the most potent product for miles and puts hair on a grown man's chest--and she's made herself quite the penny off of it. cirrus is a powerful woman. she doesn't put up with bullshit and handles the majority of her conflicts herself. she's survived a thousand bullets, they say, and walked through a million acres of fire with bare feet. she's invincible. the only evidence that supports her mortality is the loss of her right eye. she shields it under a wide brimmed hat embellished with rubies and feathers from birds found a thousand miles away. but it's never hidden. it's a medal, a warning, a token of her strength. at every point they thought they'd killed her-she always came right back.

rain

rain, rain rain… where do I even start? he’s a tall, lean boy with a pretty face who tends to get himself into all kinds of sticky situations. he’s quick witted, extremely unserious, but smart as hell. he’s also a master on horseback and quite the horse whisperer. he's usually up to his neck in mud or working in the stables, boarding and managing the horses belonging to visitors, but he especially loves it when a stranger comes in, one that stays for a passing night and leaves early in the morning. he'll strike up a conversation, perhaps use his charm to get some extra coins for cheap liquor from the general store... but the boy is also a petty thief. he can't help himself, it's a habit he can't shake. the saddle bags are the easiest, but pockets and coat jackets are just so much more fun. once he slipped his hand into the coat pocket of the town's own passing ghost, stealing an important looking silver pocket watch and a dollar coin when he'd cornered him in the hay shed with the promise of a kiss. he hadn't gotten away with that one so easy... swiss--as he now knew him--returned only hours later with the brim of his hat set low and a cigarette lit between his lips and rain cracked under the pressure of a steel knife to his throat. and for some reason after that swiss took a liking to the foolish stablehand. perhaps it was his charm or the promise of a kiss he never received, but he always made the effort to bring rain little valuables from his time away. they were the only gifts he ever kept from a stranger--if you could even call him a stranger. he just made sure to never question where they came from.

phantom and aurora

who...? who are these two stragglers who just rode into town? they don't have much and they seem to be looking to stick around... I guess we'll just have to wait and see what they're about.

p1nk’s cowboy ghoul headcanons are brought to you by the entirety of lord huron’s long lost album as well as too many hours spent on red dead redemption...

(tagging @crimsonclergy and @royalchachi bc they got cowboy worms like me fr)

I’ll probably end up doing more w this, going into depth about outfits n shi. but talk to me about your thoughts, I wanna hear em.

[miss-ingno]

So @justacoyote did this last year, and I thought it was fun and wanted to give it a try! And then time passed and now I'm late as usual xD

How many works do you have on AO3? currently 210

What's your total AO3 word count? 1,133,881

What fandoms do you write for?

Primarily Guardian, Granting You A Dreamlike Life, and Grimm

Plus a couple on-and-off or exchange-only fandoms like Dreamcatcher's Deja Vu, Disney's Descendants, Naruto, Yu-Gi-Oh!, Eldest Princess On Top (Zhǎng Gōng Zhǔ Zài Shàng), Castlevania (Cartoon) and Assassin's Creed (early games).

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Partners in Crimes (RTAH RPF, Freewood, Fake AH Crew AU) at 907 kudos

Blindfold (RTAH RPF, Freewood, Fake AH Crew AU) at 858 kudos

The Dwight Timing (RTAH RPF, Jeremwood, Fake AH Crew AU) at 653 kudos

Take No Prisoners (Take No Shit), (RTAH RPF, original AH OT6, Fake AH Crew AU) at 581 kudos (my first and oldest work for ragehappy fandom /o\ and it shows lol)

Just Let Me Know If You Want It (It's Strictly Physical), (Dragon Age II, Fenders, omegaverse smut) at 561 kudos

Devil's Deal (Disney's Descendants, Jaylos + Harlos, pre-canon) at 515 kudos

As much as I loved my time back then in RTAH fandom, I do hope to eventually get a fic more popular unrelated to H*ywood, considering what was revealed about his irl behaviour.

For funsies, my top-kudoses Guardian work is Seas Cannot Be Measured (Weilan, outsider pov, kidfic) at 364 kudos. The second work I posted in my current fandom :D!

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes, because I like engaging with other fans! And if someone takes the time to leave me a comment, even a short one, I want to at least thank them because it means a lot to me <3

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably All Our Memories, They're Haunted, a Deja Vu MV fic in which Yoohyeon slowly descends into killing all her friends.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This one's hard! I write a lot of fluffy one-shots where the point is the happiness? Like, Days of Splendour is literally about Weilan getting their happy ending wedding.

Similarly, Pivot is a fix-it ending for Critical Role season 1, in which Vax doesn't die and Gilmore gets to date him, too.

And The Fringe Benefits Of Being Family is fluffy future kidfic snippets in which Weilan get to be parents while their girls grow up.

Do you get hate on fics?

I once got a backhanded compliment on a fic where the commenter asserted they didn't usually read this ship because the shippers are all sus for shipping it and did it wrong, but my take passed their sniff-test. But they'd keep a close eye on my next work for this ship, just in case.

I vaguely recall getting a comment once and then immediately deleting it, but I can't for the life of me remember why. Probably for the best?

And there was that ask I once got that sticks in my brain because it was HILARIOUS. It asserted that because I have a recognizable style and used things like. Grammar and paragraph formatting for pacing, my writing was dry and boring and the worst and I just was copying myself with every new fic. I screenshot it and had a good laugh with friends over it :D

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, and a lot of different kinds! Sometimes I want to explore certain kinks, like tentacles (What Lies In Darkness, Weilan with eldritch!Shen Wei) or D/s (Good Vibrations, Dom!ZYL with sub!Shen Wei). Other times I just want to explore the relationship between the characters (Special Occasion, Weilan birthday blowjob) or worldbuilding (Long Night In Longcheng, Weilan canon au with dragon!Shen Wei).

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I love crossovers! I sadly haven't written too many, though. I have some old WIPs for a Naruto x Batman Beyond and a YGO! x SG-1 crossovers in my pile I occasionally return to, but nowhere close to finished. And I'm seriously considering writing a Guardian x Grimm crossover at some point lol

Malum Purificatum, Guardian x Assassin's Creed II (AKA Weilan meets Ezio)

It's You And Me (Amongst The Stars), Critical Role s1 x Stargate SG-1, in which Pike & Grog meet SG-1

Sink Your Teeth In (To The People You Depend On), Jurassic World x MCU, raptor!Darcy Lewis/Owen Grady, unfinished WIP

A Trickster's Pact, ragehappy x MCU, Freewood

One Fact Changes All, YGO! x HP, Tendershipping, my first and oldest crossover, unfinished and abandoned

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

The closest I got (that I'm aware of) is someone copying the exact premise of my fic in a beat-by-beat way without crediting me for the inspiration. It was memorable because it was my most popular fic at that point and the fandom didn't have a similar premise before.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Recently someone Furimmer translated my story An Intimate Touch into Russian! First time someone found my fic worth it to translate, I'm so happy still just thinking about it :D (It's also interesting to see they chose a different snippet to highlight in the summary, ha! That one seemed to resonate with them more. Can't blame them ;) )

Have you ever co-written a fic before? I have! @itskaysno is a wonderful co-pilot <3

What's your all-time favorite ship? Weilan (Guardian), Nick/Renard/Juliette (Grimm), and Jane/Uma (Disney's Descendants). I tend to be a multishipper, but these never fail to get me in the feels :D

What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? Of my posted WIPs: Hey Baby (I Think I Wanna Marry You), Shipwreck Isles, Your Prince Is In Another Castle, and Triple Duke Coup. Probably Ghost of a Chance, too, unless I get inspired by writing different YGO! fic to pick it up again. I'm 50-50 on whether I'll find motivation to finish Let Your Hearts' Melody Entwine With Mine

Of my unposted WIPs, if I've moved on from the fandom, I'm unlikely to put them up. That's why I posted a deluge of WIPs when I left the ragehappy fandom, because I couldn't see myself picking them up again, but I also regularly regret not e.g. having posted certain Naruto fic way back when I was writing them. Now the quality just doesn't hold up to my current standard, but I'm not going back to edit them, either.

What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm pretty good at dialogue and fighting scenes! I practiced writing fighting scenes a lot because they used to be one of my weak spots, and now I'm comfy where I'm at skill level wise. I like pitting characters against each other, too, though I still have room for improvement in that area.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Environmental storytelling. Character conflict that lasts longer than a handful of scenes. 15k+ longfic (I'm terribly at keeping myself motivated to write them and then never finish). Slow burn and character/relationship development that takes a while to get to (keeping characters consistent but still having them change is hard to juggle! Especially since I have a tendency to write scenes out of order)

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

If it's a language I know, I'm comfortable with it! It needs to be done for effect, though. Unless we're talking prefixes/suffixes and other addresses of respect/relation that just don't translate well (e.g. yifu, shixiong, xiao/lao, -kun, -senpai, etc.) but reveal information about the exact way characters relate to each other.

First fandom you wrote for? Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (back on German fanfic site Animexx). It was a self-insert OC portal fic where she ends up with Seto Kaiba xD I think I named her Leia or similar? I forget.

Favorite fic you've written?

The fic I'm writing for FFFX rn is a serious contender for top spot, if I manage to pull it off the way I imagine it.

I'm still pretty proud of Two Of A Kind (Guardian, Ya Qing/Zhu Hong & Shen Wei) and Safe In Your Hands (Weilan, post-canon with smut). The older a work is, the more I tend to see the flaws in it :') so my answers usually tend to be pretty recent stuff!

@itskaysno @ganglylimbs @elenothar @the-marron @sasamelons @sailorbryant @yilian0203 @treemaidengeek if any of you (or anyone else!) would like to do this, too, feel yourself tagged <3

[apalestar]

What's a difference in dynamic between being a good/best friend of Astarion's vs being his lover or partner?

Random Anon

I'll try to dissect as best as I can. There are difference between pre-Cazador killed and post game. Then there is the nuance of Ascended vs Spawn. Content below the cut because this is long.

Pre-Cazador death.

Being his partner means he harbors a lot more fear. He will finally have something that can be used against him or taken from him. So his need to acquire power is amplified. He would want power not just for himself, but to protect his partner. At his core Astarion is terrified and seeking safety however he can. Power equates safety in his mind. That's all he's known for 200 years. The powerful subjugate the powerless. And he feels quite powerless compared to Cazador.

A good/best friend doesn't illicit this kind of fear out of him. He can more easily discard or play it off if the need arises. Ironically, this also means a good friend is going to have a much easier time convincing him not to do the ritual. Because he isn't thinking out of a place of fear for two as it were. Whilst a partner is going to need to know him really well and recognize his tells to convince him not to ascend.

A lover or a partner he's fearful at this stage that he's gonna fuck this one good thing in his life up. That he might be too complicated with too many problems to be worth someone's time. He's used to having his safety snatched away. And he sees safety in any partner he takes on.

Post Cazador Spawn Route

Astarion will view his partner as an equal. Their trust and loyalty to him for however long they will have him isn't in question. He doesn't feel powerless anymore. He isn't terrified of the shadows taking his partner from him. He wants to confide in them more. He wants to heal himself with that person by his side. He wants to replace his horrible memories of being touched by so many by the one or two he cherishes. ( Yes, I think he is genuinely into poly. Bite me. )

A partner won't have to ask to hug or kiss him, but he appreciates it anyway. He is always open to that affection from them.

A friend will be considered a partner in crime aspect. He won't be as willing to let them touch him even for a hug without asking first. There is still immense trust there. Regarding them as someone to count on even if there is distance between them. I don't think he's confiding much about recovering from his sexual trauma as a slave, but I do think he will confide about his recovery of exercising his will as a free man. Happy to detail his life and catch up.

Post Cazador Ascended Route

The ritual will have twisted and perverted him to his most neutral evil nature. By going through it, he's accepted only power will be heeded. Only power will keep him safe. A partner at this stage is an obsession. That fear of needing to protect them from the shadows hasn't gone away. His enemies will use them to exploit him. He will protect them all right. At the price of his partner's own freedom. A short leash and insecurely possessive of them.

Love is little more than obsession to the Ascended. His partner is not his equal. They are beneath him.

A friend in this route can be one of two things: A potential rival to dealt with eventually. A potential resource to use for his benefit. He is more concerned with power. Sure you might get a beneficial arrangement out of him, but only if there is benefit to him. It's a vicious game of give and take. He's reverted to taking on all his horrible traits from Act I with few if any of his more palatable ones.

[the-ace-with-spades]

Hi again. I know you just wrote a phenomenal response to one of my asks so no pressure at all to answer this one. But I have noticed a lot of transMaverick posts on tumblr recently, and I was wondering if that’s something you vibe with at all. I think they are very cool and an interesting take on a well loved character. Your work monkey child is just so wonderful and moving that it made me curious as to your thoughts on this topic. Also feel free to not respond if you are not comfortable, as I realize this could be a sensitive topic for many people. Thank you so much!!! Hope you are doing well and that you aren’t working too hard. Make sure yo take time to have a break and smell the flowers do to speak.

Oh my, sorry but this might be a bit long as this is such an interesting topic for me...

While I enjoy fics/fanart involving trans Mav, I do not vibe with it that much?? I like it as a concept and I'll always be glad that people are up to interpret/headcanon characters as trans, no matter which characters -- there isn't much trans representation in mainstream media, especially when it comes to transmasc people, with lack of main characters being a major problems, so I definitely take comfort in headcanoning characters as trans in fanwork. I could go on a tangent here about this but the gist is, there's either no rep, very background rep that absolutely doesn't bring anything to the story and feels added as an afterthought, trans rep whose story is told in a way that can be pityable and accommodated to cis audience, and very sad, stereotypical trans rep when you've got the whole dramatic haircutting in front of a mirror, ace bandages, and 'that's not my name, mom' that's not the reality and a major simplification, or we have sob story trans rep that dies at the end. I've written a major assignment about this (curiously, before I came out as trans...) and my point is, fanwork is a form of comfort and rep that we're not getting anywhere else.

I don't vibe with trans Mav as much since my modus operandi in fandoms is primarily staying around canon/canon divergence, so most of the headcanons/ideas I like are close to the reality of the universe of the original media or could take place in it without major changes to the universe. When I write, I try to make it semi-realistic in the same way. Obviously, TG and TG:M disregard some physics laws and have a lot of very improbable things happening in them but socially and historically seem to be the same as our reality.

There's a reason I wrote Bradley coming out later in life in monkey pilot rather than have him come out before NROTC or while in flight training (and it wasn't just because I wanted to write the Jake drama...) - in short, realistically, trans people weren't allowed to be part of armed forces until 2015 (in the US, of course) and they only allowed people who were already in service to return after transition, you couldn't enlist as an openly trans person until a year later (that was iffy too, and more complicated but I won't go into details), and to this day, veterans are fighting to get their VA benefits back as they were taken away if they came out as trans after completing service... Laws regarding trans people were in general more complicated before 2010s (name and gender legal changes, mainly) as well as access to trans healthcare, and coming out as trans wouldn't really be an option (realistically) if one wanted to be part of the military anytime before 2016. Even in the monkey pilot I've taken a large artistic license (gave Ice a bit more power than he would have in reality...) to keep Bradley in the Navy post-transition.

This means there isn't a way for Mav to be openly trans and in the Navy in the 80s while also in service. It's always in the back of my mind whenever I see fanarts or read fics because the sad truth is, that wouldn't be the reality. I know a lot of trans people like to write trans characters in settings and universes with a silent 'transphobia doesn't exist' au and I can see the appeal of that at times but once again, not my modus operandi (with the exception of different job aus, I think?).

I do think that an Icemav fic could be an interesting idea and made realistically if we had Mav closeted and serving in his agab (so, female to the outside world) but slowly coming out to the found family around him (Carole, Goose) without transitioning. This is something that sometimes, undeniably, happens in the trans community -- people don't come out or start the transition process because it's not safe or will severely impact the comfort of their life. There are ways to affirm your identity without coming out in every aspect of your life and Mav might have very well been supported like that by his friends and family as long as he was in service. I imagine that it could create an internal dilemma for both Ice and Mav once they started falling for each other -- Mav, as he'd probably want to come clean, and Ice because he'd have to decide if he would be able to relationship with a guy. I imagine they would live their life as a hetero couple outside their home, and as truly themselves in their own home for the majority of their lives and Mav would transition late in life, at the age of fifty-three, and this is also something so underexplored. You might have noticed that trans Mav art and fics are mostly with him being a twenty-something twink, which, again, is probably more relatable as most fandom people are twenty-something, but it kind of takes away the appeal for me -- I like to find comfort in that despite the struggles and the reality for trans people being bad, there's a happy ending waiting somewhere or with someone.

Different people engage in fandom for different reasons and I totally understand that my point of view may not be the most common one. I'll never say that people shouldn't headcanon/write/draw Mav as trans because, in the end, I don't have to be completely on board to find it enjoyable or to see the value it can bring to others.

I'm sorry if this was a bit long and thank you for the asks - it's so kind of you to send any at all to me. Once again, hope you're doing well and taking care of yourself too 💙

[theviceadmiralswife]

What Doberman loves about his wife

salute recruits and soldiers still on this special Sunday and also vice admiral Dobermans birthday ⚓🌊⚓🌊⚓🌊⚓🌊

ALL POSTS today are about Doberman and I start with this brand-new post followed by a blast from the past. Enjoy.😉

Salute recruits and soldiers on this special Sunday 🌊⚓🌊⚓🌊⚓🌊⚓🌊⚓🌊⚓🌊⚓

To celebrate 🍾 vice admiral Dobermans birthday (pssst he's 51 now on this blog)

 I post only posts related to Doberman for today if you like to see more visit my blog for all posts of all vice admirals.

Here's a new post with attributes and characteristics Doberman loves about his wife. My husbands is the total package.😋😊

PHYSICALLY:

♡•  Doberman has a size kink a major size kink, his wife needs to be short, its less of a sexual thing , rather it makes him feel like her protector a role that he loves... though he doesn't  deny the benefits in bed

♡•he likes medium to long hair, its the best when he gets rough in bed and needs to reign his wife in

♡• loves a bit bigger butt its so fabulous fir spanking and wide hips, it makes his breeding instincts go insane 

♡• Doberman doesn't mind what skin colour his wife has as long as she takes care of her skin. Also her body in general , Doberman loves when his wife just creamed or use oil for skin care routine it makes it smell so good and feels so much softer

♡• when she has a cute smile with a shy blush, it makes this old vice admirals heart skip a beat or two 

♡• •skin to skin contact is important to Doberman 

♡•Dobermans most favourite thing about his wife's body are the lovehandles, she might not like it, but Doberman doesn't care, no matter what position, missionary , sitting, doggie or in any place he loves to grab her lovehandles, squeezing them tight and make his wife move to his pleasure. 

♥️♥️♥️♥️❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

EMOTIONAL AND MENTAL

♡• Doberman enjoys hot baths with his wife its a different type of intimacy, stoic steady slow its the feeling of being completely vulnerable and the fact that his wife washes him that gives him the greatest sense of care 

♡• Dobermans wife is submissive in general but very well capable of defending herself,  he likes the duality in her nature, submisse sweet and but also a little powerhouse not to be underestimated 

♡• Doberman loves his wife and her loyalty and honesty are his favourite traits of hers, he enjoys absolute open talks with her about everything and she listens. He also appreciates the fact that around his colleagues she keeps her tongue in check.

♡• his wife's laugh has to be infectious and make Doberman drop his normally stoic stern face, to curve up into a smile or make him chuckle too, he sees and hears so much bad stuff that he needs his wife laugh to cheer him up.

♡• Doberman admires his wife creativity and her ability to turn junk into art or a useful item it never ceases to amaze him what her cute little head comes up with

♡•Doberman loves that his wife created a home for them, a place where he can leave the evil of the World outside of the door

[lotus-btas]

BTaS Update: May-July 2023 - Pages of Lotus

Back again after a VERY long while without an update. Sorry for that, I'm forgetful.

Let me catch you up to speed on how the progress for Beyond Time and Space has been going these past few months, where we are now, and how we'll do things moving into the future.

Starting with the past, I'm gonna be fully honest: I haven't made a lot of progress with episode 2. Towards the end of May and the entire month of June, I've been suffering some serious burnout, to the point where interacting with my work would make my physically ill and exhausted. For a while I thought about skipping episode 2 entirely and moving on to 3, but then remembered that I stopped working on ep 3 because of my dissatisfaction/change of ideas with ep 2 that mentally stopped me from moving into the next arc. I'm still semi trying to get over it, but every day I can feel my creative drive starting to kick back in. I just need to sit down, focus, and get to work, which is a lot harder these days than ever before.

I also mentioned in the past how I was gonna host a beta reading for the first episode of Beyond Time and Space on the 20th of May. That also didn't happen. Not only was I sick with a headache on the 19th of that month, but I was rushed to the hospital for treatment, and spend the 20th, 21st, 22nd, and 23rd recovering. Plus, that post got little to no interest or attraction, so making a sign up that no one would bother to mess with seemed kind of pointless.

As of the present, right now I'm working on trying to balance my energy between BTaS and my other projects and interest, to make sure that my burnout doesn't get as dangerously bad as it did in May and June. It seems to be working. None of them are making much sound progress, as I keep getting distracted by my own thoughts, but it's keeping my energy in check, which is all I need.

I also decided to start working on a pilot for Beyond Time and Space! Yeah! The one thing that I should've started with, especially because this is an animated series, I'm doing now, a full year after I wrote the first episode! Kinda ironic! I find a huge benefit of this being that I know my characters super well now, but the big disadvantage is finding something for them to do; how they can interact with this new environment that I'm putting them in for a single short episode. That's also been a little draining. Might need to brainstorm some more.

And, last but not least, going forward. My plans from this point on is to hopefully have a more consistent update schedule (every or every other Saturday, if I can remember), maybe create and show off some art made specifically for the updates, like a visual summary. I'm also working on a twitter account for Beyond Time and Space that is currently up, but probably won't have anything on it for quite a while. I'm a full believer that it's never too early to share your work, but I'm an anxious gun that needs some sort of visual content to back it up, if that makes sense.

Anyways this is really long. Apologies for that. I would add a TL;DR, but I'm kinda in a rush now because I gotta cook dinner. Just getting this out of the way beforehand (and because the time it took to write this was the same amount of time I had left before the time to cook dinner struck, so it kind of just fell in my lap). Maybe I'll include one once I reblog with the tag list.

Thanks for spending your time reading this update! Your eyes are a blessing :D

- Yors Truly