#being english i always have to take joy in it lol

[tenthdocter]

both german teams getting knocked out of the group stage of the world cup is sooo funny tho

germany mnt 🤝 germany wnt

[peachysunrize]

Insolent wench ⥃ Prince Regent!Aemond

Summary: when he finds the master of whispers’ daughter in the council room in the dead of the night playing with the marble ball he gave to Aegon earlier, the dragon in him is ready to burn or succumb to her.

Pairing: prince regent!Aemond Targaryen x Larys Strong’s daughter reader

Warnings: 18+ mdni! Dark content -> manipulation & blackmail! Dark!reader even a bit of dubcon, virginity loss, virgin!reader, degrading, rough sex, spanking, pussy slapping, breeding, fingering, porn with little plot, ehem using the ball as a toy, Larys’ daughter has zero description, English isn’t my first language<3

Word count: 3.07k+

A/n: thank you @namelesslosers for giving me this dynamic idea & thank you @sylasthegrim for beta reading this for me🥹 Happy rough fucking with Aemond everyone🤭 Reblogs & comments are most appreciated!💕 also I was too lazy to make an aesthetic moodboard for my fic lol

He lurks in the corridors of the Keep that lead to the Small Council room. It has become his little secret, a routine he has always longed to have, and now, after months of yearning, he finally has it.

The halls are silent, and the sound of every step he takes echoes within the walls. Aemond walks with Blackfyre attached to his hip, the heavy weight of the Valyrian steel makes him smirk. Truly, he has never felt an emotion so deeply rooted inside him that makes the hair on his nape rouse, but now being the regent and the protector of the realm does it for him.

He stops for a moment when he finds the door to the council’s room ajar, the flickering of the candlelight visible from outside. He has never encountered anyone at such an hour, everyone has to be abed, except for the guards who are the ones that aren’t found anywhere near this room.

He takes a cautious step towards the door, hearing the sound of a low humming coming from inside. He reaches for Aegon’s dagger, fingers wrapping around the hilt as he pushes the door open slowly, his good eye skimming the room only to find someone’s back to him, leaning over the table and playing with his marble ball.

“A fine night, is it not, my Prince Regent?” you ask him, your back still to him as you fidget with the ball on the table, walking towards the King’s chair with a sway in your hips.

“What is your business here, Lady Strong?” he asks, letting go of the dagger before he locks his hands behind his back, walking towards his previous seat at the end of the marble desk.

He watches you closely, his good eye following your every move as you sit down on his chair at the head of the table, rolling the ball between your fingers as you look up from the ball to him slowly.

“I am disheartened by your words to my father,” you say, leaning back on the chair while your thumb rubs over the smooth surface of the marble ball in your hand, “he has served the King and your grace faithfully.”

Aemond doesn’t move from his spot, staring solely at your fingers as they rub and caress what belongs to him. He listens carefully, though he is not sure what good it might come out of conversing with a lady like you at such an hour.

“Your father sought power when he already had more than he deserved,” he replies, taking prolonged steps towards you, stopping at Tyland Lannister’s empty chair, “my council is no place for cunning rats like him.”

You chuckle, leaning your head on the back of the chair with a smirk tugging on the corner of your mouth, and it irritates Aemond to no end to see you finding such immense joy in tormenting him—even though you have not really started yet.

You were always such a strange lady to him; so much like your father in the sense that you stopped at nothing to obtain what you wanted".He has heard tales of your rebellious nature in the court, always listening and bothering the royals with your remarks, but they have failed to tell him about your blinding beauty.

“I thought you were ruling in your brother’s stead while he recovers, my prince,” you say, pushing the ball until it starts rolling towards where Aemond stands, “allegedly, this is his council, not yours.”

“Yet your father assumed he’d be my Hand, not my brother’s,” he moves the ball on the table as he walks towards Orwyle’s seat, his gaze never leaving yours, “it does make me wonder how hungry both he and you are for the attention of the royals, my lady.”

“Oh, you have mistaken my motives, your grace,” you stand up, stepping on the opposite side of him, matching his pace as he rounds the table with confidence until he’s standing behind the King’s chair, “I am not here to seek power or the attention of the royals, no. I am here to tell you that sometimes you need to think before you utter some words; ugly rats like my father as you said, tend to thrive on them, best is to learn how to say those words without causing a problem.”

“Mind your tongue, little girl,” Aemond spits out the words, closing his fingers around the ball tightly before he strides towards you purposefully with a tinge of fury in his steps.

“Not little, my prince,” you match his tone, standing where you are until he is right in front of you, the purple of his eye now fully gone as darkness seeps through his iris, “certainly older than you. I reckon you like older women, given your rendezvous to the brothel and all.”

His hand comes up to grip your jaw, squishing your cheeks harshly as he looms over you, his face inches away from yours as his nostrils flare in anger.

“Watch yourself, insolent wench. You are in no position to drag my name in the dirt. Your father tried, and look where he is now—called a Toad by me, dismissed as my Hand and ready to fetch Otto Hightower like a dog,” he says through gritted teeth, his nails digging into your face as he leans closer, his hot breath hitting your lips.

“Your name is already filthy by your own hands. You and Larys Strong have more in common than you think; both kinslayers—“ he cuts you off by spinning you away from him, pushing you down on the table roughly by his large palm on your back.

“Filthy whores like you should be executed in the muddy streets of Flea Bottom and their heads parading around the city on a spike,” he presses himself against your back, his crotch rubbing against your skirt, “Lucky for you, I know how to treat girls like you.”

“I assumed His Grace took no pleasure in taking whores,” you laugh with a jab in your tone at him, “I would love to see how you treat them though. Your brother is the one with tales of his masterful bedding, not you.”

“Tormenting me at the hour of the wolf has severe consequences which I will deliver to you accordingly, Strong,” he groans against your ear, reaching for his dagger to tear through the fabric of your dress, the remaining layers falling on the floor with ease. “Punishment or not, you will learn you shall never wake the dragon for you will burn and the only thing that will remain is your ashes.”

Your small clothes join your ruined dress on the floor, leaving you bare and dripping to the Prince Regent’s eye, devouring the sight of your flesh like a man starved.

The moan that slips from your lips when you feel something cold against your heated cunt is shameless, just like the sound a whore in the Street of Silk would make. 

Aemond starts rubbing your buzzing pearl with the marble ball between his fingers, his breathless laugh against the shell of your ear only makes the feeling of the coldness against your most vulnerable part much stronger.

“You were playing with my property, now I shall use it to make you a property of mine as well,” he whispers, his teeth sinking in the flesh of your neck as he moves the ball faster, your juices flowing down on the cold stone in his hand.

You realize you have awakened the beast within him as he quickens his movements, one hand pinning you to the table and the other rubbing the bundle of nerves furiously, tightening the knot in your core. You fist your hands, nails digging into your palm as your breathing turns into panting.

“It is in your blood it seems, to enjoy having the attention of someone who can easily snap your neck in half,” he mumbles more to himself than you, pleased with how shaky you have become, “you see, insolent wenches like you should be put in their place. How fortunate you are to be under my care.”

As soon as you feel your breaking point, he takes away the ball from your cunt, making you whine and arch your back in protest. He chuckles darkly, bringing the ball to your lips before he orders you to suck and clean the ball off your juices.

“My Prince—“

“Go on, you tart, show your prince how much of a power-hungry slut you are, maybe I will reconsider naming your father as my Hand.”

You comply, licking your nectar off the cold marble, humming at the taste. Aemond knows these games, at least he knew them with the little education he had in the brothels, but you? You are a different kind of lady, a master in disguise. It irritates and arouses him to no end.

Aemond lets go of the stone, bringing his palm down on your arsecheek roughly, making you yelp in surprise. He repeats his action, slapping your backside one more on the same spot he did a few seconds ago. 

You whine in pain and unbelievable pleasure as the sting of his hand spreads through your flesh, a deep primal desire rushing to your aching pussy. He looks down to find you wetter than before, and the sight makes him almost lose his self-restraint, almost.

You wrap your hand around the ball tightly, crying out when you feel the impact of another spank not on your bottom but on your cunt. The pain mixes with an undeniably overwhelming pleasure that has you biting your lip, not wishing to give him the satisfaction. He senses it anyway and hears the muffled scream as he lands another slap on your swollen folds with a sinister smile. 

“I wonder if your father knows of your whereabouts, his daughter ready to be turned into his future king’s whore,” he brings two of his fingers to his mouth, covering them with his spit before he reaches down to play with your pussy, no patience left in him as he thrusts his fingers inside you, groaning at the feel of your warmth.

You do not have the chance to tell him about your maidenhead, and with how fast he is moving his fingers, you can no longer think of it as an issue — your plans are falling into the right path.

Your mind has turned into a mush with how luscious his fingers feel inside you, not a foreign feeling but his fingers are much longer and thicker than you and reach deeper inside you, having you moaning and clawing the table.

“It only takes a few fingers to have your mouth shut, Lady Strong. I wonder what you’d do when I have my cock deep in your cunt,” he leans down to lick at your cheek, his fingers moving faster as he presses his bulge to your thigh. This time, he doesn’t pull away and keeps his pace up, curving his digits to hit your sweet spot rapidly, bringing you closer to your high. 

“My prince, please—“

“That’s it, Strong, give it to me,” he groans out the words, resting his forehead on the side of your face. He hums as soon as you start shaking and tightening around his fingers, gushing your wetness on him.

He doesn’t kiss you, no, he just licks over your lips as you moan and part them in pure delight, seeing stars as your peak rocks your body forward. 

“Fuck it, I need to be buried inside you, seeing for myself how the real blood of Strongs feels like,” he says, biting your cheek as he pulls his fingers out, wiping them on the red handprint on your bottom before reaching for his doublet, unbuttoning it and pulling his linen undershirt out of his leather pants. His fingers unlace his trousers quickly, pushing them and his breeches down enough for his cock to spring free.

He aligns his leaking tip with your soaked entrance, filling you to the hilt with one swift snap of his slim hips. Aemond groans, your wet pulsating walls enveloping his length in a delicious way that not even Sylvie has made him feel.

His hands make a home on your hips as soon as he starts thrusting his cock at a fast bruising pace, not letting you adjust to how his girth stretches your walls more than you thought you’d expect. Your maidenhead is now gone, you can feel his tip licking at the head of your womb, nudging it with each snap of his hips to yours.

Aemond cannot take his eye off of the way his cock disappears inside you, coated with your essence and wetness as he fucks you with abandon, his brain foggy with a desire he has only felt while burning his brother and killing his nephew—you are special in his eye, you awaken the dragon within him, insolent wench as he so likes to call you.

Your hands grow clammy, and the ball falls from your grasp with Aemond’s rough hammering, rolling on the table until it falls on the floor, making a loud uncomfortable noise that matches your unladylike moans and gasps in pleasure.

“You can’t even hold a fucking ball in your hands, Strong. Is your father as weak as you? Will he succumb to me the way you have with just a cock inside your tight pretty cunt?”

It is you who has succumbed to me, you think to yourself as coherent as your thoughts can get without the feeling of him overwhelming your senses. You nod mindlessly, thinking of how he has fallen into your trap so easily.

He comes hard, his hip bones pushing your plush thighs to the rough edges of the council’s table, filling you to the brim with his royal seed. Aemond’s head is thrown back, groaning at your name as his cock twitches inside you, the final ropes of his warm cum painting your walls.

“What have you done?” you ask shakily, faking terror as you try to push him away from you, 

“what— how could you, my prince?”

“What?” he asks dumbfounded, pulling his now softened cock out of you, looking at you with his mind now sharper than before, “what are you saying, my lady?”

“Which lord will now take me as his bride? I am—may the Seven help me— I am tainted! I-I cannot find a husband, m-my maidenhead!”

“You…” Aemond’s voice falters, “you were… you were still a maiden?”

“I was! How crude you have to be to sully my name like a- like the whores you visit? I cannot believe you—“

“Wait!” he tries to reach for you, his lips parted in sheer surprise and terror as you push away from him, nearly dropping on his knees, “My Lady, we should have a word—“

“No!” You fix your dress as best as you could, shaking your head as you run away from him, opening the doors without even looking at him, leaving him shocked and confused with his soft dick out, looking like a deer caught by the hunters.

With so little sleep, Aemond walks through the same hallways he took last night, waltzing inside the small council with a pulsating heart. His eye finds Larys alone in the room, humming as he plays with the marble ball you — his daughter — were playing with last night.

“My Prince Regent,” Lord Larys stands up and bows, “what a lovely day, do you not think so?”

“Lovely morrow indeed,” Aemond says, sitting at the head of the table, glaring at Larys who rolls his marble ball from side to side, “state your mind or leave me.”

“My daughter, Your Grace,” Larys sighs, a ghost of a smirk finding its way onto his face, “she was… in a not-so-pleasant state for her status when she sought me out.”

“What of her?” Aemond tries to remain unbothered, but he knows there is a scheme going on that his intelligence could not pick up on last night.

“She said you forced yourself upon her,” Larys drops the ball on the floor as he locks his hand on the table, his eyes meeting Aemond’s, glaring at him with newfound confidence, “that no Lord will take her now, that you have tainted and impured my daughter!”

“I assure you, my good Lord, that is a lie. Your daughter was the one who made me do it—“ he tries to reason with him, but Larys has none of it.

“So you admit that you yielded to your desires and took my daughter’s innocence! How wild, how disgusting! To know I wished to be in your council—“

“‘Mind your tongue, Lord Larys. I do not care if you are to leave the Keep, but you will not talk to me as if I’m lesser than I was before!” Aemond’s voice booms through the room, slamming his fist on the table as he stands up.

“You are a lesser man, Prince Aemond. A man who gave into his desires and used his power over a helpless noble woman…”

“What is it you wish for me to do? I have not forced myself upon your daughter, she partook in the act willingly if not more enthusiastically than me.” Aemond’s breathing changes and his knuckles turn white as he tries to stop himself from doing something he would surely regret.

“She was crying in my arms last night—“

“Name it and it is yours!” Aemond yells at him, walking to grab Larys by his collar, “You want me to name you my Hand? I will. But in return, you shall keep your mouth shut.”

“You are in no position to tell me what to do, my prince,” Larys calms down a bit, knowing the plan he and you have made has been done perfectly, “you will make me your Hand, and you will marry my daughter in a fortnight.”

“Not acceptable! We will lose Baratheons’ support!” Aemond shoves Larys back on his seat before he starts pacing, “You are my Hand from now on, and I will arrange a good match for your daughter.”

“No, she will be the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, or I will taint your reputation the way you have done to my daughter.” 

Rest assured, Larys Strong’s only child married the former Prince Regent and now the King in a fortnight with a lavish feast thrown for her.

[bontentrio]

ATEEZ STUCK IN THE FRIENDZONE

ot8 x gn reader

summary: they are down bad for their best friend

tw: mostly fluff, maybe angst. also alcoholic drinks and being drunk in yeosang’s and wooyoung’s. parts. (+ possible spelling mistakes since english is not my first language!)

a/n: friends to lovers > any other tropes lol also requests are open rn!!

part 2: hongjoong + seonghwa | yunho + yeosang | san + mingi (more soon!)

HONGJOONG

hongjoong felt helpless. he didn’t know if you were messing with him on purpose or if you were genuinely clueless to his feelings, but he is sure he’s about to lose his mind. how much more will he be able to take of your soft touches on his skin? or how close to his face you would get when you wanted to show him something on your phone?

everything would change if he just closed the distance between you two. or if he said those three dangerous words that had been appearing in his mind every time he saw you. three words. one kiss. or both?

“joong, are you with me?” you asked suddenly, pulling him out of his thoughts. he blinked rapidly and nodded “something about buying a new laptop right?”

you hummed in response, shoving your phone in his face while scooting closer. “i think i like this pink one, it’s so very cute, but do you think it will be able to take all the digital material for class and all my sims expansions? or should i just go with the boring one that has more storage?” you asked, looking at him. it took everything in him to not kiss you right then and there, so instead, he bit his lip, pretending to think about it.

“i mean, you can always personalize it with stickers so it’s less boring” he suggested. your eyes immediately widened, not having thought about that option. “hongjoong you are a genius! i can’t believe it didn’t cross my mind”

“i know you like the back of my hand y/n” he said in a whisper, but you heard him nonetheless.

“that’s why you’re my best friend, you always complement me” you said, smiling and returning to your seat beside him, as you started purchasing the ‘boring’ laptop.

hongjoong never wanted to bang his head against a wall more.

SEONGHWA

“so he told her that she was the crazy one! can you believe that, hwa?” you asked, crossing your arms as you walked beside him. you have been rambling non stop about what happened to one of your friends and her now ex boyfriend. “bold of him to accuse her of being crazy when he was the one that cheated with her cousin” he answered, turning his head towards you and smiling.

“right, thank you! that’s exactly what i told her!” you exclaimed, throwing your arms in the air dramatically. “i swear guys are so dumb these days”

“the dumbest” he said, chuckling.

“not you of course, you are always the exception whenever i talk about men and their stupidness” you said, patting his shoulder lightly in a friendly manner. seonghwa’s heart skip a beat. he wanted to be an exception, he wanted you to realize his feelings so bad and for you to reciprocate them.

“trust me, i would not be friends with a dumb man” you continued, now grabbing his arm and leaning your head against it. “i genuinely think you are the only exception”.

he was about to start jumping from joy, were you about to realize how meant to be you both are? how you both were each other’s ‘exceptions’?

“i think you’re an exception too” he said, testing the waters as he stopped in his tracks, causing you to lift your head up to look at him. you smiled, and he swore his heart stopped beating for a second.

“of course i am! that’s why we’re best friends, hwa!” you exclaimed happily. in contrast, he internally screamed, hope slipping through his fingers slowly.

YUNHO

it was a sort of tradition to have game night every week in order to de-stress, followed by a slumber party of two. you would bring snacks and drinks, and yunho would provide the tv, playstation and games. it was the perfect arrangement.

tonight was no different: you were lying on the coach with your legs resting on top of yunho’s lap, as you quickly pressed on the buttons of your customized controller that he had gifted you for your last birthday. meanwhile, he played with his spider man joystick, silently cursing whenever he got hit by enemies.

“noo yunho i’m down! come and revive me!” you groaned when your character died. he chuckled in response “you are really bad at this game, y/n”.

you playfully hit his arm and rolled your eyes “i would be better if someone covered for me instead of running off!” you said. “i was getting supplies!” he complained, making his character bring you back to life. before he was done though, another player killed him. “what were you saying about my gaming skills, baby?” you asked, playfully.

yunho.exe stopped working, as every time you called him that nickname. he knew that you were just being friendly, but he couldn’t help how fast his heart would start beating each time. for you, it was just a word. but for him? the nickname meant everything: hope. hope that someday you will use the nickname in a way that would trascend friendship. hope that someday, you will realize his feelings and reciprocate them.

maybe if you used the word often enough, you would soon realize it.

YEOSANG

the first time you kissed was a drunken mistake. you both took one too many shots at san’s birthday party, and one thing lead to another and you ended up straddling his lap as you hungrily kissed him. despite his *very* drunk state, yeosang was over the moon, hoping this would change the direction of your friendship.

he realized how wrong he was when he woke up the morning after with a text from you that said “i hope that last night doesn’t change anything between us, i’m sorry”. he knew you were probably spiraling into the worst case scenarios, so he thought it would be healthier to just leave it there, for now at least. “we’re still friends, don’t worry” he texted back, hating himself for being a coward.

the second time was a dare at some party you attended of a mutual friend. he was the designated driver, and you knew he would have a hard time dragging his drunk friends back back to the car, so you offered to stay sober with him. he told you that it wasn’t necessary, earning a warm smile from you as you replied “that’s what best friends are for”.

the music was loud and the place was filled with drunk people, some making out in corners of the room, others engaging in incomprehensible conversations. yeosang and you were gathered in a circle with your friends as you played some sort of truth or dare game. it was mingi’s turn to spin the empty bottle of beer, having just finished his dare. to your misfortune, it landed on you.

“truth” you answered, earning groans from your friends, complaining about how ‘boring’ that option is. “y/n you picked truth last time! it’s dare time” mingi said in between giggles. “ugh fine, dare then i guess” you said, rolling your eyes as a smile creeped on your face.

“i dare you to kiss someone from this circle” he said, quickly glancing at yeosang, who immediately paled. you blushed, meditating your options for a moment before turning to your best friend. “we kissed once and remained friends. please don’t let this change”, you said, crashing your lips against his.

and he was, once again, over the moon, choosing to ignore the last part of that sentence.

SAN

“sannie!” you exclaimed, running up to him and throwing your arms around his neck. his arms immediately wrapped around you, holding you in place as he hid his face on your neck, inhaling your scent in discretion. it’s been too long since he last saw you, felt you near him. “i missed you so much, san! tell me everything about the tour”

you spent the afternoon talking about his adventures while on tour, showing you pictures of different places and telling you funny anecdotes of his members. each time he finished a story, you would smile so big and radiantly he found himself trying to control his heartbeat from racing. you also told him about how you were doing, of course! he wanted to know every new detail in your life, even though he knew many of the updates since you both regularly texted.

“i missed this” he confessed, before adding “i missed you”. your eyes softened at his words, taking his hand on yours. “i missed you too, sannie. it’s hell not being able to see your best friend every day as usual” you said. unbeknownst to you, you had just broken his heart a little with that last part. he just nodded, giving you a small smile.

on tour he felt your absence in words he couldn’t describe, always reaching for you when you weren’t there or aching to just grab his phone and call you. so, he decided he had enough of that. he was determined to tell you his feelings.

“actually, i bought something for-“ he started saying, but got interrupted by your phone vibrating beside you. “sorry, hold on” you said, before picking up. a smiled immediately appeared on your face, lighting up your whole aura as you talked back to whoever was on the phone with you. san couldn’t be more in love with you.

“sorry sannie, i have to leave. i thought my date cancelled tonight but apparently will be able to make it on time. so i have to leave right now to get ready for it” you explained.

his heart broke once again, letting go of the silver necklace he had bought for you. maybe another time, or maybe he was already too late.

MINGI

you were starting to get annoyed, and mingi knew it. you stood in front of him, crossing your arms as you looked at him questioningly. “i just don’t understand why you won’t let me read your songs”, you complained.

mingi sighed in response, leaving his notebook on the table beside him. “because it’s personal, y/n”. you rolled your eyes in annoyance, not believing a single word that came out of his mouth. “oh so now it’s personal? wasn’t it also personal when you, without my knowledge may i add, read my diary?” you argued back.

“that was different and you know it! i literally didn’t even know it was your diary” he said. “plus you forgave me for that!”

on normal circumstances, he would let you read his song notebook as many times as you wanted, hell, he would even sing/rap the verses for you. but ever since he realized that the meaning behind those songs revolved around you, about how you, his best friend, were his main source of inspiration, he decided to never let those songs see the light of day. unless until he was ready. what if you were repulsed? what if you decided he was creepy and distanced yourself from him? he didn’t even want to think about those scenarios.

“yes i did, but that doesn’t change the fact that you still read about my deepest thoughts and-“ you started saying, before your eyes widened and your voice started stuttering “wait. do you- do you actually not trust me? do you think i would leak the songs to the media?”

mingi honestly couldn’t believe what he was hearing. or worse, what you said next: “is this also why you’ve been avoiding me?”. mingi felt like punching himself, had he been avoiding you unconsciously? he knew he started keeping his distance a bit more, not replying as quick and not visiting as often as before. but he thought the changes were not noticeable by you.

you stared at him, tears forming slowly but surely on your eyes, as you tried so hard to keep them from falling. mingi was looking down, too lost on his thoughts. you waited a few moments, before muttering a low “i would never do that to you, mingi”.

he realized you were gone when he heard the door closing behind you.

WOOYOUNG

“if looks could kill, that guy would be long dead” yunho said, wrapping an arm around wooyoung as he smiled teasingly. he huffed, not taking his eyes from you and the random guy that had been keeping you entertained for longer than appreciated.

you were just getting drinks from the bar, but a random guy approached you suddenly and stole your attention before wooyoung could do something about it. you didn’t look uncomfortable, so it’s not like he could just walk up to you and steal you away. you weren’t even “his” to steal to begin with, his official title being “my bestest friend in the whole world” as you would say. a title that he, in fact, despised.

“you can always intervene you know? i mean they were supposed to get you a drink” yunho pointed out before sipping from his beer can. wooyoung looked at him. then looked back at you. his decision was made the moment he saw the man reach for your waist.

“love, what’s taking my drink so long?” he asked as soon as he approached you at the bar, stealing you away from the man and wrapping his arm around your waist instead. you turned to him, unknowing of his true intentions “oh my god woo i forgot! here it is, i’m sorry”

but wooyoung’s eyes didn’t leave the man, who immediately averted his gaze. “i didn’t know you had a boyfriend” the man said, glancing back at you. “he’s actually my best-“ you started saying but wooyoung interrupted you.

“boyfriend, yes. i think you should leave” .

JONGHO

jongho felt your arms wrap around him from behind the coach, pulling him back and stilling him in his place. he looked up at you and smiled softly, as you looked down with the same kind of smile. then, both of your attention was drifted back to wooyoung, who was dramatically telling a story about how hongjoong almost lost his laptop again.

“correction: someone stole it the first time, i didn’t lose it” hongjoong pointed out, earning a laugh from you. as cheesy as it seems, jongho truly believed that it is his favorite sound.

actually, you were his favorite everything: favorite person, favorite singer (despite only hearing you sing in the car or shower), favorite cook. the sound of your voice and laugh was his favorite, along with the way your face expressed clearly how you were feeling at the moment. to him, you were an open book, his favorite book.

the only problem was that he wasn’t sure if he was yours. yes, you were closer to him than with the rest, often confiding in him with your deepest secrets. you built an irreplaceable bond with him, one that he was truly afraid to break if he told you about his feelings. so for now, he settled with enjoying the skinship you offered.

getting too entertained by the dramatic scenery displayed in front of you, neither of you noticed mingi looking at your small, almost unconscious, interactions.

“hey how come we never get to hug you without getting kicked, jongho?” mingi asked, making everyone take notice of the way you were hugging and resting your head on jongho’s, as he traced his fingers along your arms.

“best friend privileges” you answered, noticing the way jongho flinched while he tried to think of a quick way to answer. what you didn’t know, was that your explanation made him want to scream. “oh really? isn’t it because-“ mingi started teasing, only to be interrupted by jongho abruptly standing up to kick him jokingly as he screamed, trying to block what he was trying to say.

he was willing to die with the secret that he had fallen deeply and stupidly in love with his favorite everything.

[xtreme-shipper]

Just Don't Give Up

Azriel (ACOTAR) x FReader (Human)

WC: 1.5K (Oneshot)

Summary: When it all becomes too much to keep going, our favorite Shadowsinger shows up just in time.

Warnings: Mentions of (and attempt at) suicide, angsty, I think, canon divergent, not proofread, lol, hurt/comfort, English is not my first language. Let me know if I should add anything <3

N/A: Hi! This is my first ACOTAR fanfic, so constructive criticism is really appreciated :) It's been a while since I've written fanfiction, but recently, I've been obsessed with Az, so here we are.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

The night sky was blinding in the best way possible. Another year had passed, and you could see from the distance how your friends were celebrating another Starfall, a drunken joy filling the air, their voices full of excitement. The preparations started early this year, and the night court went all the way in, with concerts throughout the city and free drinks for all its citizens. You could tell the party would go on until sunrise and wondered, not for the first time tonight, why weren’t you down there with them?

“Is everything alright?” Az had asked you earlier that day. You nodded, smiling brightly at him.

“Just had a long night.” He nodded, not fully convinced, but he didn’t push the subject, which you were grateful for. You didn’t need to ruin the mood because of your problems.

 Nightmares from under the mountain still plagued your sleep, making it almost impossible to get any rest, and it was starting to show. The things that you had to see while not being able to do anything haunted your every second.

You didn't expect to survive when you escaped from the human lands, but Rhys found you not long after you crossed the border. He wanted you to turn around, warning you that Prythian wasn’t safe, but the alternative—going back to town—was not an option; anything would be better than that, even certain death. So you stubbornly refused to, claiming you knew how to take care of yourself. The problem was that one of Amarantha’s minions watched the interaction and wanted you for its own entertainment, so Rhys had to pretend that he had taken a liking to you and wanted you as his pet.

Word got to Amarantha, and she wasn’t particularly happy with her plaything taking a liking to someone else, so she punished him while you watched, unable to do anything. Useless.

After that first time, Amarantha decided it was a fun idea to have his “beloved” pet watch the suffering she had caused. So, every time you did anything she deemed disrespectful (which was basically everything), a torture session would take place. You couldn’t help but think that if you had just stayed where you belonged, Rhys wouldn’t have suffered as much as he did. It was your fault, even when he insisted that it wasn’t.

Shaking your head, you try to get rid of the memories.

You turn your eyes to the stars, the same ones you prayed to every night. Always the same wish without any answer from them and wonder, like you so often do, whether you should still be here.

The inner circle had never treated you as less or excluded you from anything. They were your support when no one else would lend a helping hand, and with the years, they became your family, yet even now, you still feel like an outsider. You weren’t Illyrian like Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel. Heck, you weren’t even Fae to begin with. You ended up being in the way most of the time.

You took your jacket off, letting the cold breeze hug your bare arms, where scars of silent battles painted them. A shiver ran down your spine as you stepped closer to the edge of the building.

In the human lands, your family never cared for you, and even when you left, no one mourned your “death”. Here in Velaris, you had people looking out for you, yet you felt like you didn’t quite fit in.

Would they notice? Would they care if you just… disappeared? Fae's lives were so endless that compared to them, humans’ existence must seem… insignificant.

Another step. You had slipped from the party when it all became too much. Your feet were moving on their own accord. Another shiver, another step. They would probably mourn for a while but then move on. You could stop the nightmares and the pain, and they could move on; Rhys wouldn’t have a living reminder of every time he was abused and had to endure the shame. Or when he was beaten, and you had to patch him up with your scarce medical knowledge.

Az and Cass could stop pretending that you didn’t cause their brother more suffering. That your recklessness didn’t make things worse. That they didn’t believe you weren’t brave enough to help him.

You are standing on the border of the building now, eyes fixed on the stars above, “Please,” you whispered. “Please.” You weren’t sure what you were asking for any more. Relieve from the pain, the guilt? Maybe you didn’t need an answer from the stars to fulfill that. You could hear the music all the way up here, a serene tune drowning the rest of the noise. You start walking on the edge, arms stretched wide to give yourself a bit more balance. One step, then another.

Letting go… should you… just one step…

A cold grip settles on your ankle and another on your wrist, pulling you carefully away from the border while a sad smile paints your lips.

You were used to Az’s shadows clinging to you from time to time, so you welcomed the touch but didn’t budge. You knew their master was standing a couple of steps behind you. “You know, you aren’t very sneaky for a spymaster.”

“I was looking for you.” His voice wasn’t more than a whisper. “I was worried since you left so early.”

“I’m fine” was all you said. A lie you had perfected over time.

He led out a humorless laugh. “You don’t seem fine.” You hear his steps, careful but loud, so you know he is getting closer. “Can you please step away, Sunshine?” You tense at the use of your nickname. So familiar by now, yet so unfitting.

“It’s fine, Az. I’m just admiring the night sky.” You can feel him right behind, you know. “It’s a beautiful sight.”

“Y/N… why are you here?” You knew he meant at the rooftop, but your mind couldn’t help going to a darker place.

You take a moment to answer, weighing your options. After a couple of silent minutes, you decide to be honest. “Did you know…” You pause for a second to try to stabilize your breathing. “That I was not only responsible for treating the High Lord's wounds? I was also tasked to inflict them.” You choke at your words, your throat feeling like it's closing, and it’s getting hard to breathe, but you push the words out anyway. “I am responsible for every scar that never fully healed, for every messed-up nightmare he has at night. I can still feel the way his muscles tensed every time I inflicted pain.” The world was spinning before your eyes, and the words were coming out in short breaths. You were gasping for air, struggling to get any inside your lungs, but still, the words wouldn’t stop coming out of your mouth.

“I’m the reason he suffered. If I hadn’t been there that day, or maybe if I had put up with my life at the… maybe he wouldn’t… he saw his… and I couldn’t… anything…” you close your eyes again. “How am I supposed to live here and accept all his help and love whe—”

A strong hand grabs you by your waist, interrupting your words and yanking you away from your doom. “It wasn’t your fault.” Az’s whisper came breathless, and his arms, though firmly hugging you, were shaking.

Tears were running down your face, staining his shirt. A protective wing wrapped around you, offering shelter. Giving you a protection you didn’t deserve. “I need the guilt to stop, Az. I’m a broken reminder of his pain, and selfishly, I can’t take it anymore.” You felt so tiny, so… shattered, fragments of yourself falling to the floor with every tear shed. He was silent for a moment, trying to hold you together while you crumbled.

Then his words reach your ears. “He once told me you remind him of his sister, you know?” One of his hands starts caressing your hair while the other firmly supports you against his body. “That your bad jokes to lighten the dreary mood and your constant presence were some of the things that kept him from giving up. That thanks to you, he was able to survive long enough to find his mate.” A loud sob shakes your entire body, hands fisting his shirt as you grab onto him for dear life. “Do you know why I call you ‘Sunshine’?” Az pauses, so you shake your head in response. “Rhys had been suffering long before you got there, and when he told us how you gave him hope, even when you yourself were silently breaking apart, how you would sing to him and brighten the mood with your warm voice, I knew. I knew you were like the sun he had been deprived of for so long. You saved my brother in the way that mattered the most. You were his light, and ever since you started living with us, you became my light, too.”

You were speechless at his words; raising your head from his chest, you looked into those beautiful hazel eyes and found nothing but tenderness. “You are my light, and I’m sorry it took so long for me to say it, Sunshine.” He places a kiss on your forehead. “I won’t say it will be easy, but I promise to be here with you. We will get through this. I promise, ok?” You nod as his grip tightens. “Just don’t give up, Sunshine.”

[walpu]

hii, first of all, sorry for my bad english

this may sound weird, but lately i've been thinking of aventurine turning in a cat. like, for some strange reason (maybe during a mission), he turned in a cute little cat. and since reader doesn't know he's a cat, he feels free to enjoy all reader's affection, and maybe to let his emotions win and cry while being caressed. and then he turns human and he's crying enough to fill a swimming pool. idk if i explained well :(

tysm, i love love love your works!! ❤︎

AWWW THIS IS SUCH A CUTE REQUEST and don't worry your English is perfectly fine! It's not my native language as well so I get the struggle tho

I love making my faves cry so there's a possibility that I've got a bit carried away lol

taking care of cat!Aventurine

edits by @keisieudeptry on twitter

characters - Aventurine notes - gn!reader, a bit of angst, hurt/comfort, a lot of cuddles, n̷̳͙͊͛õ̵̩͓ ̸̧͉̓b̶̳́̎e̵̖͋͊ṭ̴̩̔ȧ̵̪͚̕

Aventurine

Listen, he's always on alert okay. This man rarely allows himself to relax, especially when he's on another one of his business trips.

And he knows what to expect. Lies, attempts on his life, threats etc. He has seen it all.

But this. This. This is something new. Of course anything can happen when you're dealing with The Masked fools but this? Being turned into a cat? In what place this is even funny? It is kinda funny tho just not for Aven

He knows better than to panic. Yes, being turned into a tiny orange cat was not a part of his plans. Yes, this is probably the most defenseless and vulnerable state he's been in since his childhood. Yes, this sucks. But hey not like panicking will change anything.

Instead he just sits in the corner, feeling incredibly anxious and dreadful. His only hope is that this shapeshifting trick won't last for long.

A huge wave of relief washes over him when he sees a familiar person. And not just any person but you. The only person who can put his restless mind at ease, at least for a short time. He wouldn't mind seeing Topaz or Ratio too but it's much better when it's you.

He quickly realizes, however, that his joy was premature. He can't communicate with you! And you don't know that this is him! So the only thing poor Aven can do is follow you around and... meow. It's almost humiliating. Too bad he doesn't have time to care.

Soon enough you give up at finally pick up the oddly familiar cat. Every time you try to put the cat down it starts meowing and running after you so the only thing you can do is pick it up and carry around like a potato.

And you know how it is with cats, once you put your hands on one you can't stop petting it. You run your fingers through the cat's fur absently, while checking you phone for any messages from Aventurine. Hugging the cat, pressing your face to it's soft fur. Something about it surely reminds you of Aven. The thought, no matter how childish it is, brings a small smile on your face.

And poor, poor Aven. For so long he's been longing for your touch while laying awake at night, his poor heart flattered every time your fingers brushed against his. He wants wants wants to melt into your embrace yet this is not allowed for him.

How can he ask for it without exposing the deepest and darkest parts of his soul. How can he open his heart to you without reveling all the ugly, fragile parts.

He wants to be open with you, he really does. Yet it's so unreasonably hard. Would you kiss his head like you do now if you would know how empty he is inside? Would he be able to press his forehead into you palm, asking for more more more without feeling exposed?

In a way, it's good that right now he's in this form. He doesn't really have to think about anything, doesn't have to feel anxious about revealing too much. He can just enjoy in.

You two fall asleep just like that and he doesn't have to overthink, he can just crawl to you side, nuzzling up to you.

You can't help but notice that the kitten in your arms is trembling slightly. And when you pull it closer in order to provide some warmth and comfort it just purrs and meows pitifully. Almost like it's… crying.

Now listen. I'm 100% sure Aven is a light sleeper. So there's no way he won't wake up from a loud gasp and a lot of movements near him.

Well. Seems like the shapeshifting trick the masked fool pulled on him lasted only for 12 hours. And now he lays on the couch in his human form while you look at him with the wide eyes.

Awkward.

His initial reaction is to laugh it off. "Surprised, dear? It's a shame you can't see your own face right now ha ha". Would explain the whole situation, trying to make it seem like it was not a big deal. No mention of you cuddling session tho. Max he would say is "my, my, didn't know you where such a cat person".

However, his smile freezes immediately when you wrap your arms around him, pulling him into a hug. Well. Here goes all of his feigned confidence.

Here is this feeling again. Your warmth, you scent, the comfort your touch brings. You telling how you started to get worried and how relieved you are that he didn't get hurt. It cuts so deep, makes him feel so exposed yet so needed. Loved even.

At first he doesn't even get it why your eyes get even wider, why a look so lost and worried all of the sudden. Only when your hands hesitantly cup his cheeks and you ask him what's wrong he realizes that there are tears in his eyes.

You know those tears when they just drop from your eyes and it's not like you're hysterical or crying uncontrollably but the tears just keep coming and coming and the more you try to calm down , the worse it gets? Yeah, him.

Would almost automatically tell you that everything is fine. When you confront him, pointing out that he's literally crying, will get even more confused than you. "Hah, seems like you're right, dear" he says with a small smile, giving up on the idea of hiding it from you. After all, it's too late for that anyway.

It feels... not even humiliating, no. It's weird, scary even, to be so open around someone. To be stripped of his mask so suddenly.

And yet he doesn't have time to care when your hands hold him oh so tenderly, when you cup his face and ask him what's wrong.

"Nothing, nothing, really. Just getting a bit sentimental here. Just... hold me like that for a bit more, 'kay?" he manages to whisper with a faint smile before pressing his face in the crook of your neck.

God feeling his tears on your skin feels so surreal. And heartbreaking too.

With each tender touch he gets even more emotional, to the point when he literally chokes on his own tears. Please hold him, run your fingers through his hair, kiss the top of his head.

He just doesn't get it, it feels so good to be held by you, why does his stupid heart hurts so much then?

Honestly he didn't cry for so long and there are so many repressed feelings, just let him let it all out.

He'll probably fall asleep in your arms, feeling very exhausted after the sudden emotional outburst. In the morning would act like nothing has happened, making some dismissing comments about him being a bit overdramatic last night. Don't let him withdraw into himself but don't push him to open up too much as well.

Just touch him more often from now on, especially when he looks like he had a bad day. And eventually he'll turn into your lap cat, reaching out for your warmth himself with or without reason.

"You're being clingy again" "Am not <З" all while sitting on your lap.

You've domesticated him so good luck.

[pedripics]

Pedri via Residency - July 18, 2024

How are you feeling? - "Incredible! Winning the Euros was crazy"

How is the injury? - "Better every day. I've just started my holidays, but I'm training every day to recover and start the season at the top of my game"

Winning the World Cup? - "I can't even imagine that feeling. It's the dream that every child who plays football wants to fulfil. I have already won LaLiga with Barça and now the Euros with Spain. Now on to the Champions League and the World Cup"

How did your family react to seeing you win the Euros? - "They were very happy! They were with us at every game of the tournament and at the celebrations"

Feelings for next season? - "Very good, both personally and as a team. It could be a great year"

Winning World Cup or Champions League? - "Why choose? That's like choosing between your dad and mom"

How did you feel when you were lying on the ground because of your injury? - "I knew what he had done to me that was going to stop me from playing. I was in pain and also annoyed that I had to stop because of the injury."

Do you like Japan? - "Yes! I like sushi... and I won an Olympic medal there"

Will Nico come to Barça? - "I have no answer to that question. What is clear is that he would be a great signing for Barça. He has shown what he is capable of in the Euros"

Would you play as a goalkeeper? - "Hahahaha that's what my father was there for. There is no need for more goalkeepers in my family"

Did you have a great time at the Euros celebrations? - "I had a crazy time, actually. It was a moment of celebration with the whole country after a great tournament. Although I had to take care of my knee at all times. The rest of the players didn't have that problem 🥲" (kroos i am gonna find you istg)

Where do you see yourself in 5 years? - "Well... playing football at the highest level, like now. In the future I want to start a family, but in 5 years i am not so sure"

Is it fun to do photoshoots? - "I always say no to my team and especially at the beginning I was embarrassed, but now I'm used to it. I try to have fun and have a good time, although I prefer a ball to a camera"

Advice when you suffer from your first big injury? - "Well, be patient, because in the end, with work and effort, the good times return"

Feelings for the new season? - "I think it's going to be really good. Now it's time to rest a bit and recover and get back to work as soon as possible under the orders of the new coach. We are sure that this new season will bring us a lot of joy."

Do you have a favourite female singer? - "Hora Cero, by Myke Towers, is the one I've liked the most lately... and of course 'Pedro' by Raffaella Carrá" (sir that's not an answer and we both know it lol)

Real Madrid will win La Liga again - "Veremos..."

Advice for young players? - "Have fun playing and try not to lose the things that street football gives you"

Favourite teammate? - "Ferran. The truth is, he is a great teammate and friend. He always supports me and gives me advice"

Is Ferran single? - "I would say so, unless he's gotten a girlfriend since Tuesday when I haven't seen him"

Your best friend? - "I have several. Dani, Fran and Rubén, who have been my friends since childhood"

Are you excited about the new Camp Nou? - "I am already looking forward to playing there again. Playing at the Camp Nou will surely help us on be on top... The visit impressed me, because of the project and because I saw how it works inside"

Where are you on vacation? - "As always, I am on holidays on my island, in Tenerife"

Where do you see yourself in 10 years? Looking like my profile picture (a picture of him being bald)? - "Yessss. Everyone is asking me if I am going bald... one day I will, for sure! That's easier than having Cucurella's hair"

Dream vacation? - "Wherever it is, with my family and friends"

Who do you think will be the next Golden Boy? - "Lamine, 100x100"

Tea or coffee? - "I drink neither"

Are you learning English? - "I learnt a bit… let's see if after the holidays I really get into it and speak it properly soon"

Where did your obsession with bananas come from? - "It's not an obsession. It's true that i really like them and in the Canary Islands, it's a typical product used in many recipes"

What do you do so bad comments don't affect you? - "do things as good as possible. I know what I do and what I do not do; I cannot control what people say or invent"

You promised to grow a mustache. When will you do it? - "Maybe I am doing it these days and then I will share some photos" (NO PLEASE DON'T)

[twomiddlefingersforthehaters]

I didn't notice that Kyun was used again in the manga. I think everyone knows how this onomatopoeia first appeared in the manga, yes ofc Kishi used it for Naruto.

Naruto got existed by the anticipation of fighting sasuke... ｢キュン｣ Kyun is a common onomatopoeia in Japan when you fall in love and also used for feeling spark or thrill in one's heart. SFX for momentary tightening of one's chest caused by powerful feelings Or to have butterflies. ｢ゾクゾクする｣ zokuzoku suru- Thrilling is an expression for shaking, to get chills, to be shaking as from joy or excitement Or having tingling sensation (excitement). In here tightening (Kyun) happening in his lower abdomen.

何だ... にの気持ち下腹の辺りがキュンとする それに... ゾクゾクする

nanda... Kono kimochi shita bara no atari ga kyun to suru Sore ni... zokuzoku suru

"What... is this feeling? My lower stomach feels tight/feels butterflies! And... I feel a thrill/ shivers."

This expression is generally uses when butterflies take flight in your stomach when you're sexually aroused. It is that feeling in your stomach when you get turned on. So it literally means he's being sexually excited. In the middle of his thoughts he also remembers when Sasuke tells him he's also interested in fighting him too, where Naruto reacted ドキ ( "doki")

キュン - onomatopoeias that express strong affection (mainly love). The feeling of excitement is like your heart beating hard and constricting. It's similar to when you're so happy you can't breathe. What makes people feel excited varies from person to person.

So, キュン means pounding, fluttered,thump etc... once, instant (ュン feels it is once and gone), a bit light but very sharp (since with キ sound)

-My heart skipped a beat!

- I got this tingling sensation.

- Heartthrob

e. g:

1．その映画で胸キュンしましたか?

sono eiga de mune kyun shimashita ka ?

Did that movie make your heart skip?

2．猫が可愛すぎてキュン死する。

neko ga kawaisugite Kyunshi suru

The cat is so adorable, it's killing me! ( just an exaggeration)

3．この前、あなたの投げキッスに胸がキュンとした。

kono mae, anata no nage kissu ni mune ga kyun to shita.

Last time I saw you, my heart skipped a beat from the kisses you blew (to) me.

4．この絵にキュンとしました 。

kono e ni kyun to shimashita.

I felt a flutter of excitement when I saw this picture.

キュンとした (kyun toshita) has nuances such as "I was touched", " I was moved" , "I was impressed" etc...

[It means you see a picture, and instantly hit by an emotion hard to describe, but it is pleasant]

5．この犬かわいいね。胸がキュンキュンするわ。

kono inu kawaii ne. mune ga kyunkyun suru wa.

What a cute dog! My heart gets pounding.

6．ふとした瞬間の考えてることが一緒なところ。同じタイミングで同じ歌を口ずさんだりすることがあるとキュンとする（笑）

futoshita shunkan no kangaeteru koto ga issho na tokoro. onaji taimingu de onaji uta wo kuchizusan dari suru koto ga aru to kyun to suru

We tend to have the same thoughts at certain moments. It makes my heart flutter when we start humming the same song at the same time (lol)

7．かわいい犬を見て『キュン』 死しそう になった。

kawaii inu wo mite Kyun shishisō ni natta.

When I saw the cute dog I died from cuteness overload.

[N̳o̳t̳e̳:̳ there's no English expression that can be literally translated キュン死 but it can use, “to die from cuteness, to die from cuteness overload, OR so cute that I died”. キュン死 can also be used when you "almost died because someone's too hot,sexy etc., " in that case, the translation be like " die from hotness or sexiness" or something like "he's so hot and I can die". ]

8． 彼女の事を思うと胸がキュンとなる。

kanojo no koto wo omou to mune ga kyun to naru.

When I think about her my heart flutters.

9．何回みても、キュンキュンするね

nan kai mite mo, kyunkyun suru ne

No matter how many times we watch (him), he (still) gives the butterflies, doesn't he?

N̳o̳t̳e̳:̳ キュンキュンする is used to describe a situation where you are so happy that your heart beats fast, or that you find it difficult to breathe in a normal way, etc. It is almost always used for young people being like that, especially when they are meeting somebody they like/ are in love with. Used in a situations when you say: - My heart is aching. - I got this tingling sensation

10. 彼を見るたびに、胸がキュンとする感じがします

kare wo miru tabini, mune ga kyun to suru kan ji ga shimasu

Whenever I see him, I feel a flutter in my chest.

11. 胸がキュンときました｡

mune ga kyun tokimashita.

My heart skipped a beat. (N̳o̳t̳e̳:̳ It is often used when a love began or similar emotion. Mune-kyun is an abbreviation for chest-kyun, which means that your chest tightens with excitement.)

N̳o̳t̳e̳:̳ When a person of the opposite sex that you like shows a cute expression just for you, you feel doki. ``Kyun'' is a momentary feeling of happy elation. As you can say, it's a happy feeling when you see something cute. When you see something cute, you use "kyun" to describe the heart-warming emotion you feel at that moment.

There are times when music makes you go 'kyun' or movies makes you go 'kyun'. I think it can also be used in a broader sense. Originally, it was a word used to describe love or the excitement you feel when you meet someone of the opposite sex. However, if you are deeply moved, you will also feel excited, so it is an exciting situation after all.

キュンです (kyundesu) is originally means when your heart pounding / flutters its an exaggerated meaning from onomatopeia キュンキュン (kyunkyun). when you see something cute your chest become painful in love in other words its a word used when your heart beating fast the short term for "my chest pounding!" what kind of situation you can use this is when your heart flutter by the action / words of the person you like or looking at the pet or when you see something cute your heart is pounding / flutters and finally when you're happy its kyundesu.

"Kyun" is an onomatopoeia, so even if you look it up in a dictionary, you may only find a wide range of meanings and uses, or you may find a way of using it that is not mentioned in the dictionary. Ultimately, you have to infer the meaning from the feel of the word and the context.

When Sasuke sees "Itachi", he is suddenly struck by "memories of his older brother"...

As he Saw the Edo Tensei Itachi's profile he recalled → Itachi's old profile (so distant) → kid Itachi's smiling face from the front (also the forehead poke)→ reaching towards him (thought he would gouge out his eyes)→ his final forehead poke with a smile-> his death

This whole recalled scene have the gap that needed to fill (the truth behind the lies).

Sasuke was obviously surprised & shocked because "someone he thought was dead suddenly appeared in front of him..."

Sasuke goes "kikyun" when he finds his big brother who was dead jumps through the trees in front of him and in the next panel it shows Sasuke's shocked face unable to believe what he just saw, and then instinctively glared towards his brother's direction...

So, キキュン is the sfx that made in his abdomen after seeing his beloved brother for the first time in a long time.

[in the manga it is an effect that conveys emotions, but if they actually added this sound in the anime, I think it would just sound like Sasuke had an upset stomach]

For just a moment, Sasuke has entered a space that is completely cut off from the outside world. Of course, there are no onomatopoeia in the description of the memories he is tracing... it is a world of complete silence. But in a world where even sound is blocked out, it's as if everything has frozen... And Sasuke's eyes are looking somewhere in the distance... he seems to be looking at Itachi, but he's probably not looking anywhere. Sasuke's expression is indescribable... He reminisced about Itachi's past and his abdomen goes "kikyun" because of this unexpected encounter....because he was sure that the person running in front of him was Itachi.

I wonder if this "kikyun" sound actually occurred in the abdomen, or if it is a mental description of "that's how it felt".

"キ (ki) " sound is a "sound" that actually accompanies pain or with a slight pain, like something stabbing you in the stomach and the "kyun" sound is more of a "sensation" that expresses the heart-pounding with joy.

The pain of painful memories + the desire to be with his brother + amid fond memories + the two conflicting emotions of anger and happy + wanted to spend more time with his beloved Brother are all tangled up inside Sasuke= maybe this is how the combination of ki-Kyun happened.

OR

it may be anger. Remember what sai said when he was blaming Sakura before Shikamaru told her about the mission to kill Sasuke in ch. 559, “When I look at Naruto these days I can feel... (his) sadness... and when I think of Sasuke... my stomach gets hot... and I realise that it's anger”. However, I don't think it's anger because that's not the whole meaning of "kyun." And from the panel it wasn't looking like Sasuke was getting angry.

Conclusion: Seeing his brother it brought back old memories of his brother and evoked some strong emotions, making him feel very moved. You can use "kyun" when you are shocked in a positive way. It is clear from the context and from the second page that his abdomen goes kikyun because he was literally shocked. It is enough to evoke strong emotions in anyone if they had seen their brother risen from the dead.

kishi uses "onomatopoeia" and "background" to express their feelings. This technique by Kishimoto is interesting because it allows the reader to use their imagination in various ways. キキュン seems to be an original word created by Kishi and I've never heard anyone using it.

Sasuke tries really hard to talk to Itachi and chase him. How much of a big brother boy is he? He's so cute!! Sasuke suddenly let out all his pent up thoughts and doubts on his brother... That's how much he'd been suffering and carrying it all by himself up until now.

Itachi doesn't show even a trace of his true face in front of Sasuke, that he showed in front of Naruto and the others... Itachi has things he has to do, and he knows very well that "he should never have met Sasuke" because he, who is supposed to be dead, unnecessarily gets involved with Sasuke. Now, he clearly distinguishes between what he should do and what he shouldn't be involved in, and he strictly follows that line... "I'm essentially a dead man... I won't say any more," and keeps running away from Sasuke...

this is a very honest expression of Sasuke's true feelings

Sasuke had always chased after Itachi. he imitated his brother and chased after him. Feeling the responsibility of having the proud Uchiha clan name left to himself, he desperately tried to surpass his brother, chasing after his brother's back, but the more he got to know his brother, the more the wall of "perfection" stood in Sasuke's way. From an early age, he wanted to be acknowledged by his father, and desired to hear from his father "as expected from my son or That's my son" and not "Keep this up just like your older Brother", but his father and others saw him as "Itachi's younger brother" and always being compared to his overly excellent older brother, he was underestimated. But that did not stop him from idolizing his brother. And he loves his brother very much. Even amongst his family members, Sasuke places Itachi on a high pedestal.

But through this unexpected reunion, Sasuke was able to see and understand his brother's "convincing way of life"... even if he couldn't accept it. he returns to his childlike state when he is with his older brother. And Sasuke finally called Itachi "兄さん = big brother". The fact that he can honestly say "Big Brother" means that Sasuke is returning to being the "real Sasuke". Fighting while relying on each other's backs is "proof of teamwork" and finally....showed their trust by standing back to back naturally.

From ch. 585 to ch. 588 Sasuke called him 兄さん。But In Ch. 589 Sasuke uses 兄(あに) = ani= (older) brother...-> is actually formal... It is never used by children, and mostly used in a more formal conversations when you tell someone about your brother, or in literary styles.

With each seal, Sasuke's expression changes... Sasuke may have expected Itachi's reaction, but I think he feels a sense of repulsion and ``as I expected'' towards his brother who, even at this point, refuses to show even the slightest bit of his true self. When Itachi reaches the "Monkey" seal in ch. 589, Sasuke eyes quickly change back from Sharingan to normal. Perhaps he got his Sharingan back to remind himself that their "time as brothers" was over. Itachi, who had been making the seal, stopped... His back was still turned as usual, but he was still listening seriously to what Sasuke was saying.

But when their time as brothers ended, Sasuke finally changed back from "nīsan" to "anta" Or rather, it felt like the dream time ended and he was suddenly pulled back to reality, and then he naturally changed back to "anta."

The way Sasuke talks about his "older brother" in ch. 589 as if he were a third party seems to suggest that he has put his childhood memories behind him as the "past" and is now looking towards the "present and future." It also sounds like he is bidding farewell to his "older brother who has become a thing of the past."

The fact that the Edo Tensei seal ended with the boar , perhaps means that the Edo Tensei came to an end with the brothers' " great boar hunt = Kabuto hunt"

In the end Sasuke (again) called him "nii-san" in his mind, rather than calling him "Itachi" Or "Anta". A 16-year-old Sasuke, the expression on Sasuke's face as he gazed upon his brother reminded him of the innocent 7-year-old when he was looking at his brother's back. a lonely face.

Just like that day... the day of the Uchiha incident, the day Sasuke reminding Itachi to teach Shuriken... he was smiling when he was looking at his brother's back, but then he was saddened to see the broken wall with the Uchiha symbol on it that his brother had destroyed by throwing a shuriken, and muttered in his mind, "Nii-san". The final sweet moment he got from his brother was at that day. Sasuke was probably feeling the same anxiety and sadness he had felt back then when he was only 7-year-old. Even in this last moment his brother was distancing himself from him and running away from him.

Itachi walks towards Sasuke with his last bit of strength. He looked so panicked as Itachi approaching him and pointed his fingers towards his head, it paralleled the last scene between them, when he thought his brother was going to pluck his eyes out.

His hand, stretched out as if to flee, passed over Sasuke's head and grabbed him, pulling him towards. Sasuke will never see "Itachi's back" again... This will truly be the last time he sees his brother's back....because this is the Gesture that truly means, 'I am not Lying and I am not distancing myself' instead he closed the distance between them. He no longer pushed Sasuke away with a finger to the forehead. It's a full brotherly embrace now. In Itachi's words, which seem to be honest and straightforward, there is also his "brother's honest feelings" hidden within them. I think that's why he uses the word "always" twice. when he says "I love you," it's unusual for him to use hiragana "おれ (ore) " instead of "オレ." It sounding as gentle and soft as that final smile he gave to Sasuke. Like the gentle words of a mother.

Kishi clearly shows us that Itachi is more than just Sasuke's brother. He established a motherly bond when Itachi was just 5 years old and Sasuke was a newborn baby. We've seen Mikoto carry baby Sasuke and to introduce Kushina. But when it came to a life-threatening situation like the Kyuubi incident, Itachi played the mother role (ch.502). And he checks Sasuke's performance in Academy just like a Father.

Itachi regretted not thinking anything from Sasuke's POV which hurted him even more. He also admitted he tried to use Kotoamastukami against Sasuke himself. He tried to manipulate him, he tried to force Sasuke to follow his own desires, he only saw Sasuke as an object, meant to keep him in the shadows forever. By the end, Itachi confessed his mistakes then stopped trying to force Sasuke into doing anything.

The hand that grabbed Sasuke's head, and said the manly words that he didn't have to forgive " me " forever...He looked straight ahead with gentle eyes and said the embracing words, " I will always love you." It shows the unconditional love between siblings.

When Sasuke thinks of Itachi, he looks up at the sky. For example, in ch. 403, after hearing the truth about Itachi, he was looking up at the full moon at the Akatsuki hideout.

And when he saw Itachi in the forest, he looked up at his brother's direction... From that moment on, Sasuke entered a "dreamlike time." At that time, he was wandering alone in the darkness, soaking wet like a lost kitten...

But now, he was wrapped in a gentle light, he look up at his older brother as he returns to the sky... He was wrapped in warm love and somehow he looked dazed.

Likewise, Sasuke "looked up" at the beginning of this brother's reunion, and he was "looking up" again at the end of this farewell. Sasuke looks like a little boy who wakes up and realizes his brother is gone. But his brother's "warmth" still remains.　

Sasuke's expression has definitely softened compared to before he entered the forest. Itachi's final smile showed that he still believed in Sasuke... it was a clear, happy smile that showed towards his brother. He tells Sasuke only the truth and lets him choose his own path from there. That's a big difference from before.

Sasuke's "love for his older brother" were stronger than Itachi had thought . For his brother, for his family... the "love" in Sasuke's heart was deeper (than expected). Because his love was so great and deep, he ended up carrying more sadness and hatred than he had expected.

In that respect, Naruto understood Sasuke very well. After hearing the truth about Itachi, Naruto said: "Sasuke loved his family and clan... it's because his love is so deep, it's hard for him to forgive"

These images and the panels that follow in the manga sum up their relationship perfectly. The panel above is the highlight about the "two brothers" and their story....because Kishi started their flashback with this panel (ch.220)

An older brother carrying his little brother on his back was aware of what was going on around him, but the one behind had closed his eyes and was completely oblivious to what was happening. It's really amusing how Kishi drew it: “Sasuke closed his eyes and Itachi was looking at his brother....fully aware of his surroundings.” Itachi knows what's going on with his clan, but Sasuke is completely kept in the dark and was oblivious, that's the whole story right?

The bottom panel is the beginning of ch. 591. Last moments between siblings. Nothing was hidden now, he heard and saw the truth he wanted to hear from his brother. Itachi's back was no longer turned to his little brother, now he was not ignoring him... he was smiling and putting their head together. It was a true "farewell between the brothers".

So, their sibling relationship had its dark phase, betrayal, hurt, pain and lies. But beyond all that, Sasuke always loved his brother.

In the beginning of the manga, because of his brother's manipulations and lies Sasuke had to live a life full of hatred, suffering, misery and he ended up doesn't care about what happens to him.... BUT...because of Naruto...we saw through Sasuke's monologue at the end of the manga about how he will appreciate and value life. Naruto and Sasuke...they have walked completely different paths, they have experienced and learned similar things in parallel. They both have things they lack and yet.....Naruto makes up for Sasuke's, and Sasuke makes up for Naruto's. That is why they are depicted as equals and balancing each other out. Itachi says himself to Sasuke that he can no longer change sasuke and actually thinks naruto is the one able to. And what can really change sasuke's heart is love. naruto's love. After accepting Naruto's love for him, he hopes to see the world more like naruto. Sasuke also emphasis that Naruto never tried to stop him as anything but as his friend, and because of that, Sasuke was saved. When Sasuke said, "You came closer to my heart" , From those words "You came", Sasuke's gratitude, feelings, and "happiness" towards Naruto are fully conveyed... Now, Sasuke's heart is filled. They understand each other's pain and feelings at a level no one else can, and from a very young age they unknowingly bond with each other over these shared feelings and emotions, and that bond withstood. He is now willing to share the burden of that suffering with Naruto (your sufferings and wishes are passed on to me) just as Naruto tried to do to Sasuke the whole time (I'll bear the burden of your hatred and I'll die with you). Sasuke is willing to try it Naruto's way and accepting him instead of trying to carry the burden and sufferings all alone.

He specifically says in his monologue that he would try to hope for better things to happen, try to find ways to love himself and his life, because if he could do it for Naruto, he could probably do it for himself and other things. and he look for ways to cope with life, and relying on Naruto's love to be able to do so eventually. Because even if he cannot do so ever, at least Naruto will be there for him, always.

And the fact that the last words were not spoken by "Naruto" but by "Sasuke" made you realize once again that the story of NARUTO is not just about "Naruto"... it is a story that has been woven by the two of them, "Naruto and Sasuke"

[calamaroo]

In an art slump and wanna yap, so take this for your travels~~~

Octonauts Culture Headcanons: (mostly Barnacles because he's my favorite) (with a focus on languages):

Be warned, this is long af lol

Barnacles (& his family):

1. I've said it before, but he's Inuit, and was raised to speak Inuktuk (the language is very varied in names, with many dialects, but by my research, that is the broadest term for it)

2. In the Navy, it was mostly drilled out of him, and he practically forgot it for many years until he spent his angst time with Bianca and Tracker and re-learned it. Now, he loves to speak it with them, and sometimes yaps in it with his crew to mess with them (because no one understands it)

3. When the cubs visit, they speak Inuktuk with Barnacles, and often have to be reminded to speak English with the Octonauts (again, because no one understands the language, and they're hyper little children taking 90 mph)

4. Sometimes when Barnacles is talking about/to Bianca, Tracker, or the cubs, he'll use their Inuit names, and anyone else in the conversation has to be like "pause, who was that again?"

5. In the cub scouts, everyone spoke Inuktuk, or Russian, as the cubs all unanimously decided to learn it to surprise Natquik (I imagine it was his birthday or smthn, and they all sprung out and said "Happy Birthday!" In Russian. He cried tears of joy for hours.) --- I headcanon Natquik is half Inuit, and also knows the Russian dialect : Nunik.

6. When Barnacles wants to yap/is homesick but can't get in touch with any other Inuit characters, he gets down in the dumps because no one else will understand him/relate to his culture. So, in an effort to eliminate these sad spells, the crew are trying their best to learn more about Inuit culture and languages.

7. He's good with accents as he's heard hundreds in his travels, and can mimick most of them, including the thickest ones (uses this to bond/mesh with his crew's wide range of accents)

8. Pretty good at Vegimalese, but still sometimes has to ask Shellington what a certain string of chirps and trills meant

Languages/ spoken : AMER English, EURO/UK English, Inuktuk (several dialects), Spanish (for Peso), French, & Scottish Gaelic (he pretty much speaks at least a little of everything from hearing it all over the world)

Kwazii (& Calico Jack):

1. I've toyed around with his background for a long time, but I finally settled (at least for now) that the two pirates are from Barbados. So, they grew up speaking with both pirate slang and Bajun English (Barbados-Cajun English) along with a flurry of other languages because pirates were a giant mixing pot of cultures)

2. Sometimes, Kwazii's Bajun accent will escape, and he has to remind himself to tone it down because it and the many other accents he's accumulated into his speech are so thick that no one can understand him. (Calico Jack is way worse and often goes on and on speaking in utter incomprehensible gibberish)

3. Being a pirate (and because i said so), Kwazii had always been good with pixking up on languages and dialects, so when Peso was still new to the crew and had no one really to talk to (as everyone intimidated him and no one knew Spanish), Kwazii learned it so they could bond (super freaking cute)

4. Calico Jack learned Brazilian Portuguese when stuck in the Amazon, cuz that was the natural language for the animals and such. So he taught it to Kwazii, and they occasionally chit chat in it.

5. When talking to Calico Jack, they speak a hundred different languages, all mingled together at one time (often several la,guages in one scentene), and it gives anyone trying to listen in whiplash. It's a very effective deterrent/security measure when sharing secrets in public.

Languages spoken : AMER English, Spanish, Brazillian Portuguese, Bajun English, Scottish Gaelic, and tidbits of other languages from the pirate mixing pot (he's the most fluent of the crew in Inuktuk, although it's proving to be a challenging language to learn)

Tweak (& Ranger Marsh):

1. Florida people. /j

2. Southern Floridian (very yeehaw, very demure) raised to speak English, but also half Cajun French (on her mom's side) and can speak several dialects of French, but is most comfortable in Cajun French. (Tweak and Kwazii bond over being partly Cajun in language)

Languages spoken : French, AMER English

Dashi (& Ryle):

1. African-Amer-Australian, but hides the thickness of her accent well. When she gets mad, though, she goes crazy with slang (Kwazii thinks it's funny and makes her mad on purpose to hear "her funny words")

2. Shellington is Scottish, and they are besties, so she took it upon herself to learn Scottish Gaelic for him

3. She learned French for Tweak, too, because she's a girl's girl (and a girlboss)

4. Learned Spanish for Peso so they could gossip (pop off besties)

5. Used to be a pilot (which is why she can so easily fly the Octoray) and Japan was her favorite place to travel, so she learned the language.

6. Like Kwazii, she is good at picking up languages (cuz pilot = going everywhere (but isn't as good as Kwazii))

7. When video calling/hanging out with Ryla, her accent gets thicker untentionally

Languages spoken : AUST English, AMER English, EURO/UK English, Scottish Gaelic, French, Spanish, & Japanese (with tidbits of others)

Shellington (& Pearl and Periwinkle):

1. SCOTTISH MAN, SAVE ME SCOTTISH MAN

2. Grew up speaking both EURO/UK English and Scottish Gaelic (very fluent in both)

3. When visiting Pearl and Peri, they all speak Scot. Gaelic. One time, they brought Kwazii along, and out of nowhere, he picked up on the tea-time language and joined in. It freaked the otters out fr

4. Peri forgets to speak English to the Octonauts like the polar bear cubs (they are scout-group friends, change my mind) (I also ship Bianca x Pearl, sooooo they are all kinda step-siblings)

5. The only member to fully understand Vegimalese

Languages spoken : EURO/UK English, AUST English (for Dashi, although his accent isn't very good), Vegimalese, & Scottish Gaelic

Peso (& his family):

1. Hispanic. I will fight you for this. /j (AMERICAN DUB RAAAAH 🦅🦅🦅)

2. He knows a good deal of Bajun for Kwazii and Calico Jack and learned Brazillian Portuguese for CJ, as for the first few years of his Octoagent-cy, it was what he spoke the most

3. A lot like Barnacles in the fact that he knows a ton of languages, but it's mostly just how to ask medical questions and comfort frightened patients

4. Pinto also forgets to speak English with the crew and speaks ONLY Spanish with Peso when they are alone. Peso will try to talk to him in English and Pinto with exclusively respond in Spanish (younger brother activity fr)

5. Learning Gaelic to better listen to Shellington's yap sessions (nerds = best bros) (or bf's, cuz I fw that)

Languages spoken : EURO/UK English, AMER English, Spanish, Brazilian Portuguese, & some Scottish Gaelic.

Inkling (& Min and Natquik):

1. Grew up speaking EURO English, but learned Chinese Mandarin for Min, and sometimes speaks it without realizing.

2. 🗣🗣🗣HE AND NATQUIK ARE GOOD FRIENDS BECAUSE THEY ARE BOTH BARNACLES'S FATHERS. So, he learned Russian to better communicate with Natquik, who forgets to speak English often

3. He learned Gaelic for Shellington because they are scholarly nerd friends, they yap together

Languages spoken : EURO English, Scottish Gaelic, Chinese Mandarin, some Inuktuk (for Barnacles), & Vegimalese

[fluentmoviequoter]

Take all the time you need 💕

My idea: Deacon got a girlfriend (let’s pretend Annie isn’t there) and she is a teacher at a high school.

One today there is a shooting going down at her school and Deacon and the team don’t know if she is there or not and can’t reach her. Turns out the shooter is in her class and Deacon has somehow get her save.

I hope it makes somehow sense 😅 English isn’t my native language -🥰

Thank you for being patient and for requesting!! This makes perfect sense; no worries. I love pretending Annie doesn't exist lol. I changed this a teeny tiny bit and let the reader do a little bit of saving before Deacon saves her. I hope you enjoy and please let me know what you think!🤍

Warnings: canon-typical action/danger/violence, school shooting (loosely based on 2x11), angst, fluff.

Word Count: 2.3k+ words

Picture from Pinterest

Worried for You

When Deacon Kay imagined his future, he did not picture being 30 David this far into his career, nor did he dream that he would have a girlfriend who spends her days teaching high school students. Since he met you, his life has been brighter. You make each other happy. The last year and a half of dating has been filled with late-night phone calls, weekly date nights, and more joy than you thought possible.

“Deac!” you call, jumping into his arms when he turns to greet you.

“Hey, you,” he replies, hugging you tightly. “Our table is ready if you are.”

You nod, beaming at him as you slip your hand into his. He leads you to the table, pulling your chair out before sitting across from you.

“How was your day?” you ask, ignoring the menu after all the date nights you’ve had here.

“It was pretty good, mostly training since it was quiet for once. But I’m more interested in you and your day,” Deacon responds.

“Nothing special, just teaching teenagers. Again. Tell me a story?”

Deacon sighs as you bat your eyelashes at him but begins a story anyway. “Hondo and I were paired up for a breach a few years ago, but the way the house was laid out, we weren’t going to be able to see each other for long. We didn’t know how many people were in there, so we made an inconspicuous code word to alert the other if something went wrong. Well, it should have been inconspicuous, but Hondo’s first choice was ‘mango.’ Great if you’re in a store or something, not so great in a barricaded safe house.”

You laugh with Deacon, reaching across the table to hold his hand as you ask, “Should we have a code word? We could use it when you’d rather spend time with me than Hondo.”

“So, daily?”

“Seriously, David. Can we?”

“Of course. What were you thinking?”

“It has to be something that fits into any conversation, so… tree?”

“Not bad. What if I need to know something about a tree though?”

“Like what?”

Deacon’s eyes stay on yours as he concedes, “Good point. Tree it is.”

“Do you- do you have quiet days often?”

“Depends. Some weeks are quiet, and sometimes you don’t have a quiet day for months.”

“I just- you know I worry about you, so I like hearing about quiet days.”

“Hey,” Deacon says, dipping his head to catch your eyes. “I know worrying is inevitable, and I can’t imagine what it takes to be in a relationship with me and what I do, but I promise that I will always fight to come back to you. I have a good team and we watch each other’s backs.”

You nod, but Deacon looks like he wants more.

“I know you’ll do everything you can to come back to me. And that helps a lot. Thank you, Deacon.” The moment is more serious than most of your date nights, so you add, “At least you don’t have to worry about me. I just have to deal with teenage hormones and ears that don’t work or brains that don’t comprehend.”

“That sounds much worse than what I face every day,” Deacon replies dramatically.

✯✯✯✯✯

Your students know when you’ve been on a date, you’re always in a great mood the next morning. You habitually check your phone throughout the day but smile more after a date.

“Are you ever going to tell us who the lucky guy is?” one of your students pries.

“Are you ever going to meet the rubric requirements on an assignment?” you reply sarcastically.

“Ooh,” several of the students exclaim.

“Alright, guys, let’s get started,” you begin, pausing when your phone chimes.

“You said no ringers in class,” someone laments.

You snatch your phone up at Deacon’s text tone, holding your breath while you read it. Everything is fine; he just texted about your next date night. You breathe out and smile, typing a quick reply before you turn to the board.

✯✯✯✯✯

During your third class, a distant scream is audible through the closed door. You glance at the window, unamused with and immune to teenagers and their obnoxious actions. When you hear a gunshot, your demeanor switches instantly.

“Quiet,” you snap at a girl who looks ready to scream.

Several more shots echo, so you can’t tell where they’re coming from.

“Everyone in the supply closet, take your bags with you,” you demand quietly. “It will be tight but stay down and stay quiet.”

Someone whimpers your name, and you crouch in the open doorway.

“Everything is going to be fine,” you promise before closing the door.

You slide a desk over, lining it up in front of the door in a way you hope looks like it is supposed to be there. Crouching, you walk back towards your desk, trying to avoid the windows and the glass pane in the door. The doorknob jiggles, and you rush to your desk, grabbing your phone as you fall into your chair.

“Drop the phone!” the shooter yells as he enters, leveling his gun on you.

Setting the phone down, you lock it to hide the half-typed text to Deacon. That may be the last thing he hears from you, so you’re glad you started by telling him you love him. You raise your hands and look at the crazed gunman before you.

“Just stay calm okay, this doesn’t have to be like this,” you say gently.

✯✯✯✯✯

“Let’s roll, 20 David!” Hicks yells as he enters the common area. “School shooting going down and we have to get in there now.”

“Confirmed casualties?” Hondo asks.

“Do we know who the shooter is?” Deacon adds.

Hicks takes a deep breath and turns toward the team as he tells them the name of the school. “Casualties unknown and no confirmed ID, but two possibilities. I’m sorry, guys, but you’re the best option here.”

“Let’s do this,” Hondo says, leading the team to Black Betty.

Luca pulls out as soon as everyone is in. Hondo and Deacon remove their phones to check for messages from you.

“Anything?” Hondo asks, looking up from his empty phone.

Deacon shakes his head before raising his phone to his ear. His leg bounces until he lowers his hand and shakes his head at Hondo again.

“She has me on emergency bypass, if she could answer, she would have,” he explains. “And her location sharing isn’t loading.”

“Then let’s go get her and everyone else out safe,” Luca announces, taking a sharp turn.

✯✯✯✯✯

You flinch as Deacon’s ringtone dies out, the sound of glass crunching under a boot drowning it out.

“Who is supposed to be in here with you?” the shooter demands.

“No one. It’s my grading period,” you explain, trying to remain calm. “That’s why my ringer is on, because I don’t have students until after the next bell.”

The shooter nods, the gun bouncing erratically in his grip.

“Look, we can all walk away from this, but not until you stop,” you add.

The gun straightens, and you force your eyes to stay open.

✯✯✯✯✯

Deacon taps Hondo’s shoulder after he feels Street’s hand on his shoulder. They enter through the gym, giving students quiet directions to safety.

“Do you know where the shooter is?” Hondo asks quietly.

“He went that way,” a young girl answers, pointing as she runs.

“Let’s split off. Luca, Tan, go east. Street, Chris, west. Deac, we’re going for the shooter,” Hondo directs.

Deacon falls into step beside him, moving slowly and clearing classrooms as they go.

“Her room is down here, right?” Hondo whispers.

Deacon nods and then slows when they hear a gunshot. Moving faster, they reach the end of the hall: your class on the right and a large glass wall on the left.

“It doesn’t end well, it’s too late!” a man’s voice yells in your classroom.

Deacon’s eyes widen as he watches the door, praying you’re not in there, that you're somewhere safe.

“It’s not,” your voice replies calmly.

Deacon sighs, a minuscule amount of tension escaping when he hears your voice. That’s a good sign for now. Hondo slides his back against the wall, peeking into the glass on the window. He lowers quickly and looks at Deacon.

“His back is to us, and he has a gun on her, we have to think this through, Deac,” he says.

“Of course. We can’t storm in, he’s a loose cannon,” Deacon agrees.

They hear the gunshot before the door rattles, and Deacon lurches forward, reaching for the doorknob as his other hand moves toward the trigger. Hondo’s arm wraps around his shoulders, pulling him backward.

“Deac, man, calm down,” Hondo grunts, struggling against Deacon. “Charging in won’t help her any.”

“And if it’s too late?” Deacon whispers harshly, relaxing enough to pull his arms from Hondo’s grip.

“Why did you do that?” you ask inside.

Hondo pats Deacon’s back, creeping back to the door. They listen to footsteps as someone, presumably the shooter, paces in the classroom. Your voice is low as you try to calm him down. Deacon has never loved you more, but he’s never been this scared before. He has less than a split second if something goes wrong, and that’s not enough time to save anyone.

“Of course,” you answer. “See if you can find the tree.”

Deacon nods at Hondo and reaches for the doorknob.

✯✯✯✯✯

“What is that?” the shooter whispers, pointing to a display on your bulletin board.

“It’s a collection of the best projects this semester. Do you think yours may be up there?” you ask quietly.

“Can I look?”

“Of course. See if you can find the tree.”

You saw the corner of the SWAT helmet in the window before, and you hope Deacon is out there. Using the code word was pointless if he isn’t, but maybe the shooter will be distracted either way. The doorknob twists and you drop to your knees behind your desk before the door opens forcefully, banging against the wall behind it.

“LAPD SWAT, drop your weapon!” Hondo yells.

“You don’t want to kill anyone, including yourself, we know that. So drop the gun and we can get you help,” Deacon adds.

You close your eyes as Deacon talks, trying to imagine that you’re alone in the room and neither of you is in danger.

“Okay, okay,” the shooter repeats.

You hear something hit the floor, and then Hondo says something into his radio as he steps toward the shooter. Deacon’s arms wrap around you, but you keep your eyes closed as you turn in his arms, pressing your face into the plate protecting his chest. His hand rubs your back as the other cradles your head against him.

“You’re okay, it’s okay, we’re all safe, baby,” he whispers into your hair, his helmet discarded.

“There’s kids in the closet,” you say against him, tightening your arms around his waist.

His head lifts from beside yours as he tells Street to check the closet. You hear their muted gasps and stifled screams before they realize who’s opening the door.

“Are you okay?” Deacon asks.

You lean back just enough to look up at him. Nodding, you keep your arms around him as you look into his eyes.

“And you said I didn’t need to worry about you,” he says playfully, pushing your hair out of your face.

“Now you know how I feel all the time,” you reply.

He helps you to your feet, keeping a hand on you. Your students are out of the closet, and when one sees you, they all look up.

“You’re dating a narc?” someone asks.

“SWAT, actually,” Deacon replies, smiling easily. “Everyone alright?” He gets mixed nods and muttered yeses before he adds, “EMTs are outside to give you a quick check before you go home to your parents.”

The same student who wanted to know who texts you throughout the day pauses by your side to whisper, “He’s cute. Good job.”

You roll your eyes and hug her quickly before tucking yourself into Deacon's side.

“Nice work with the code word,” Hondo says, moving to stand beside Deacon. “You might’ve saved some lives today.”

“That was all Deacon,” you reply.

“No, no, I was going to charge in here and get everyone killed,” he admits. “I was worried and Hondo made me wait. How’d you get him to turn his back?”

“He wanted to see the display,” you explain, pointing to it. “Figured I could at least kill some time telling him to look for something that wasn’t there.”

 “How’d you know we were out there?”

“I didn’t know who was out there, but I saw the edge of a helmet in the window.”

“Oh, that was me. Which makes me the savior, no?” Hondo teases.

“I think she’s still the savior,” Deacon replies, tipping his head toward you.

“But you saved me, so what’s that make you?” you reply.

Deacon smiles as he loops his arm around you again.

“Get out of here,” Hondo grumbles.

✯✯✯✯✯

You spend the evening wrapped in Deacon’s arms. And his shirt that you stole.

“It’s okay to not be okay after something like that,” Deacon whispers, holding you against his chest as a forgotten movie plays in the background.

“I’ll be okay,” you promise. “All I could think about was you. I was texting you when he came in, and then you called right before he crushed my phone. Then you saved me.”

“What did your text say?”

“Not much. All I got was ‘I love you. There’s’ before the door opened and I stopped,” you answer, tracing shapes on Deacon’s chest.

“You started with I love you,” Deacon muses, shaking his head. “I love you so much.”

“I love you. Thanks for saving me.”

“Anytime.”

You lay down on his chest and kiss his jaw, glad to be alive, home with Deacon, and in his arms.

“That wasn’t an invitation to get into trouble on a regular basis,” Deacon adds. “Just for the record.”

Deacon feels you laugh against him, your chest shaking against him as another kiss lands on his jaw. He doesn’t know how you deal with the uncertainty and the worry every day, but he knows he would do it a million times over for you.

[autistook]

DAISIES - pt 1

Merry Brandybuck x fem!hobbit!reader/soft oc

Words: 3.1k

Summary: You have been best friends with Merry (and Pippin) for several years. You see each other on almost a daily basis and have been referred to as the unseperable trio, as you do almost everything together, and have all been there for each other, through thick and thin. Slowly, you start to feel something shift. Something feels different when you look at Merry.

SLOOOOOOOW burning romance, pre - the Fellowship of the Ring.

Possible TW's: panic attack, anxiety, mentions of drowning and death, dead parents

English is not my first language, and this is the first fanfiction I have written since I was 10 years old, so I apologize for any errors or confusion. 😭 Treat me gently, I am sensitive to critisism lol

-

The sun glistened on the leaves, making the raindrops that fell on them the night before look like diamonds. The grass was damp under your feet, and the slight breeze felt comfortable on your skin. The sounds of the Shire were as usual: lots of Hobbits doing their regular chores, children running around and a few groans here and there, when the sleepiest of all were forced to get up early. Your gaze followed a beautiful bird flying from one tree to another. The bird was a beautiful one, with a bright-red chest and a grey back, the feathers on the wings being different shades of grey and black. It's melodic singing as it sat on the old willow branch, is always a reminder for the Shire folk that spring has arrived. There was a fresh lavender smell in the air, and as you stopped on your feet to enjoy it, you noticed another familiar scent.

Your gaze moved to a pastry shop window, and as you started walking towards it, you could see your best friends enjoying a couple of scones, filled with strawberry jam. Your lips curved into a smile as you opened the wooden door, and the bell above it rang to announce your arrival.

The friendly Hobbit lady behind the dusty, old counter greeted you gleefully. Her hair was grey, curls all the way down to her shoulders, and the smile lines nearing the corners of her eyes revealed just how happy of a personality she must have. But your eyes weren't focused on her, but to the two young Hobbits now noticing your entry. Pippin's green eyes sparkled with joy as he noticed you enter the room. More happy than Pippin to see you, was Merry. You had been best friends with the two for a number of years, and almost every week, the three of you would sit at the bakery, planning some mischevous pranks and talking about any new happenings around the Shire.

"We were wondering where you were!" Pippin exclaimed, mouth full of the delicious scone, and some red jam from it that had decided to settle on his lips. Amused at the sight, you smirked but still decided to not say anything, as usual. It would be funnier to see how long it would take him to notice his messy appearence.

"Sorry, I had other things in mind," you said in serious tone, pulling up a chair and sitting between the two. The round table was full of crumbs and there were two empty plates. You looked at the plates and then at your dearest friends, raising one brow as if to question how on earth they could have this ritual without you.

"We got hungry, I'm sorry!" Merry said, wiping his palms on his cream colored cotton shirt.

"How dare you!" you answered with a playfully offended tone. You turned to look at Pippin for an apology, but the young Hobbit just shrugged his shoulders, and kept munching the last piece of scone in his mouth. You shook your head and chuckled slightly, leaning back on your chair.

"What did you mean when you said you had other things in mind?" asked Merry, curiously, now wiping his mouth with a napkin. You took a deep breath and crossed your arms.

"It's been twenty years," you stated, as if Pippin and Merry were supposed to immediately understand the rest of that sentence. The two locked eyes. Their faces could only be described as curious, but utterly confused.

"Twenty years since what?" Merry inquired. His blue eyes looking straight into yours, his gaze making you feel like he was almost concerned.

"Since my parents died," you sighed. Pippin immediately turned to look at Merry, flustered as the two completely forgot about this tragic event in their best friend's life.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" Merry apologized, his tone full of shame. "I completely forgot that was today."

"It's quite alright. You couldn't have known," you said with a faint smile. Your head might have told you to act fine, but the sadness behind your eyes revealed your true feelings: how tragically heartbroken you felt at that moment and how twenty years still wasn't enough of healing.

"But we should've remembered!" Merry cried in guilt. Pippin apologized, mouth full of scone, then finally swallowing the last piece. You reassured both of them that they did not offend you in any way, and that you would be fine.

"Is there anything we can do?" Merry asked, like he was in a rush to cheer you up.

"Yes! We could do something fun!" Pippin said cheerfully, his eyes sparkling with excitement. He slammed his hands on the table, making the empty plates clink against each other. "How about we go for a swim?"

"You know I can't swim, Peregrin!" you cried, arms still crossed, your fingers fidgeting with the soft fabric of the sleeves on your favorite yellow dress.

"Didn't you say you have had practice?" Pippin asked, puzzled.

"It doesn't mean I can."

"Well, we could always just go just hang around the water, you know?" Merry suggested, trying to not make your mood any worse. "We used to do that all the time when we were just little innocent Hobbits." You smiled at him with gratitude. Merry's lips curved upwards and his eyes had a glimmer of pride in them.

"That actually sounds great," you finally responded to him. "When should we go?"

"How about immediately?" said the young Took suddenly, and before either of you could answer, he was already up from his chair, quickly whisking away the empty plates from the table.

"I guess we're going?" you chuckled. You and Merry got up and before you could make a leave, he put his palm on your shoulder. His warm touch gave you a sense of comfort.

"But seriously, are you okay?" he asked, looking at you from under his brows, his eyes full of concern. You nodded and gave him a soft smile.

On your way to the river, the sun was rising higher in the sky, warming your skin. The spring breeze had settled, the lavender scent no longer lingering in the air.

"I can't believe you still can't swim," Pippin said, shaking his head. You groaned in frustration as a response. "You should know at this point!" he teased, skipping ahead of you and Merry. You shook your head. Still fidgeting with the fabric of your dress, Merry took notice of it.

"Can I help your anxiety in any way?" Merry said suddenly.

"How do you know I'm feeling anxious?" you asked, looking at him full of confusion. Merry smiled softly and compassionately.

"You always fidget something with your fingers when you feel anxious," he responded and gestured towards your sleeve, where the tips of your fingers now suddenly had stopped rubbing the dress, like they almost felt shy for being caught. You blinked slowly, moving your eyes to look at your delicate hands.

"I never realized that it was noticeable," you mumbled, slightly embarrassed. You were aware of it, but did not know it was a telltale sign of anxiety for others.

"We've been friends for years," he said, as the three of you kept walking towards the water on a gravel path, Pippin just slightly ahead of the two of you. "Of course I notice things like this."

You smiled at him, impressed by this small detail that he had noticed. Pippin was still slightly ahead of you two, every now and then stopping to gesture for you two to move faster. "That's kind of endearing, actually," you smiled and Merry let out a small snicker, turning his face to the ground.

"You actually have a lot of tells for how you're feeling," he said in a confident and knowing tone. This made you plead for him to tell you what he had noticed. "I'm not going to tell you what they are!" Merry smirked visibly amused. "Where's the fun in that?"

"If I have a tell, I will have you tell me what it is!" you said in a commanding tone, horrified of this revelation.

"I think not!" Merry exclaimed, his tone mischevous. "You just have to wonder about it for the rest of your life!" he laughed, and then in a mocking, high pitched voice, imitating you, he said: "Oh no! How did Meriadoc know I was exceptionally happy today? How did he notice I was nervous? Whatever will I do? How will I ever figure it out?"

"You jerk!" you laughed, elbowing his side gently, making him stumble a little to the left. It made him want to continue teasing you, still mocking you.

"Oh, how will I ever know? Merry is such a master at reading people!" he continued, making you crack up a little. You gave him a gentle push. You then suddenly bumped into Pippin, who was standing there, waiting for you.

"What took you so long?" Pippin asked.

"You were practically running!" Merry responded, still a wide smile on his face from teasing you. He gestured towards you and smirked. "And as I can tell from her expression, her old age has caught up to her, and her body gave up, forcing us both to slow down."

"Excuse me?" you said as your jaw dropped. "I am younger than you, Merry! I will have you know, if someone has any problems with their old age, it's you, Mister Brandybuck! Now, you old prune, what are my tells? Tell me!"

"My dear friend," Merry said, putting his hands on your shoulder. "I absolutely will not tell you."

"What are you two on about?" Pippin asked confused. Merry just chuckled, and gestured you both to follow him to a shallow part of the river, so you could safely sit with them without going too deep. You scrunched your nose at Merry, and walked behind him and Pippin to the water.

You had sat on a large rock, smoothed down by the flowing water, making it sparkle under the rays of sunshine. Every now and then some water ran over the rock, drenching your dress from the parts that were laid on the almost black stone. Twenty minutes had passed, and Merry gestured you to come closer to the slightly deeper water. You shook your head, fidgeting the sleeve of your dress anxiously. The water had finally washed away the jam from Pippin's lips as he kept plunging into the water, diving for what seemed like a forever. Pippin's head ascended from the cool water and he shook his head like a wet dog, trying to dry his curls.

"Come on, it's just waist deep!" Pippin tried to pursuade you. You just shook your head again. Pippin locked his eyes with Merry's. They both nodded in unison, turning to look at you again. "I bet you a small pouch of Southern Star that you don't have the courage."

Your ears perked up at the mention of pipe-weed. It was a delicious offer, but just the thought of going in any deeper made your heart pound faster. Pippin and Merry also knew just how to press your buttons right; they knew how competetive you were. "How much are we talking?" you inquired, your ears doing one small wiggle as your body started to show signs of peaked interest. This made Pippin and Merry chuckle.

"Does it matter? You don't have the guts!" Merry cried with a wide grin on his face. This made your fingers stop fidgeting the dress, and instead your fingertips squeezed the fabric tightly. You stood up, careful not to slip on the wet rock, and tipped your toes in the water, moving them on the surface lightly. You gave a challenging look to both mischevous hobbits, and hopped in the water, ankle deep. You took one deep breath, inhaling the warm air to help calm you down. One step after another, you slowly waded towards Merry and Pippin, who looked rather amused and impressed. The water rose as you waded in deeper and as the cold water touched your hips, you froze still.

It felt like the world stopped for a moment, and the surrounding noises of the river flowing suddenly sounded like an ominous threat coming closer and closer, about to swallow you whole. The bottom of the river was muddy and it felt like you would slowly sink, inch by inch, until you would be under water, unable to escape. The water felt like it tried to push you down, make you stumble and fall. It would laugh at your struggles to try and stay on the surface, making you regret ever taking even one step towards your best friends. How foolish of you to take up on a challenge, knowing the water was your enemy, who would smother you the first chance it got.

Suddenly you felt Merry's hand on your arm, shaking you softly. All you could hear was mumbling. Your ears were ringing and your vision was blurry, as you tried with all of your strength to not collapse from fear of facing the same destiny as your parents. Your feet lifted from the mud as Merry and Pippin lifted you by your armpits and waist to get you off to the dry land immediately, taking notice of your looming anxiety and inability to move even an inch.

What felt like forever, you soon got back to dry land and your hands gripped to the grass like it was the only thing that would keep you from falling into the flowing river. Your vision still blurry, you could distinguish the familiar voices of Merry and Pippin, but not one word was coherent. The grass felt safe and warm, pieces of dirt clinging to your wet palms and feet. You were starting to shake a little, still not able to move.

Soon you felt a warm palm on your cheek, turning your gaze to the direction of it's owner. Merry caught your attention enough to lock your eyes on his. His blue eyes felt comforting as they looked at you with compassion and care. You could see his lips moving, but not one word made sense to you. He gently brushed your cheek with his thumb, looking guilty from pressuring you.

"You're okay," you could finally decipher some of his words. Your brain felt fuzzy, and your lips were quivering with fear and anxiety. "You're safe, just breathe."

You took a deep breath, slow and steady, trying to push away the panic attack that was taking over your body. You followed Merry's guidance as much as you could make sense of it, slowly starting to feel more air in your lungs. The grass started to feel like grass again, instead of an anchor you had to hold on to, unless you wanted to drown. You felt Pippin's palm gently rubbing your back, as Merry was still caressing your cheek, guiding your every breath. You could slowly focus more, but you kept your gaze on his blue eyes, scared that if you turned your face away, the water would somehow jump on you and try to pull you back. It took you several minutes, but finally the two managed to calm you down. Your body still trembling lightly, you took one more deep breath.

"Well that was embarrassing," you jested, trying to lighten the mood immediately. Merry chuckled with relief and shook his head, lowering his hand to your shoulder from your face. Pippin didn't laugh, but instead made his way in front of your face next to Merry.

"Are you okay?" he asked nervously, clearly feeling some guilt for the second time that day. You nodded, looking at him reassuringly. Pippin's lips curled into a small smile. "Good, I thought you might feel embarrassed." You laughed loudly, voice slightly shaky.

They both got up on their feet, clothes drenched and every curl on their head dripping with water. You slowly got up, taking some support from the two hobbits and straightening your back. After a small discussion, you all agreed it was time to go home and calm down a little. Pippin did promise you that he would still give you some pipe-weed as a 'consolation prize.'

You made your way home alone for most of the journey, as Merry headed towards his home in Buckland and Pippin made his way to, in his own words, 'somewhere secret.'

The green round door of Bag End was there waiting for you, immediately providing you comfort at the sight. You entered your home and called your brother by his name. He was not your brother by blood, but being adopted to the same household and growing up together most of your lives made him as much of a brother as someone who was a blood relative would.

"Hello?" you shouted, the hallway echoing, seeming empty. You took just a few steps before Frodo's head popped up from behind a wall. He gave you a soft smile and let you know there was tea at the ready in the kitchen. Frodo had made it for himself, but so much of it was left that he decided to just let it sit there, knowing how much you liked his chamomille tea.

You made your way into the kitchen and poured some still warm tea into a small cup you inherited from your parents. It was decorated with yellow flowers and had been hand painted by your great-grandmother. You stirred it calmly, looking out of the round window, admiring the green grass and the butterflies flying around, enjoying the spring as much as any being would. The small silver spoon your uncle Bilbo had given you as a birthday present (that Lobelia Sackville-Baggins kept trying to steal) was softly moving in circles, creating music-like sounds when it hit the porcelain on the edges. Your dress had mostly dried up on your way home, but it was still slightly moist, making you do a small squirm as the slightly wet fabric of it kept clinging to your thigh.

With the tea in your hand, you started making your way to your room, but something stopped you in your tracks. As you passed a small round mirror, you noticed something behind your ear that was not supposed to be there. A small daisy was decorating your frame on the left side of your face. You touched the soft flower lightly. Merry had put it there while calming you down. A small chuckle escaped your throat. He really knew how to cheer you up, even if it took some time to notice the gesture.

Next chapter

[otherone12]

What Would They Do, If They Just Knew

(P!ATD reference lol)

Gerard Way × Reader

-> Masterlist

A/N: Hey!! This is the most basic plot ever, but it was 2am and I wanted to write something. I tried to make this with more feelings, idk I liked this one. If you have any request, I'll be happy to write it :)

A/N 2: I'm writting a Frank x Reader imagine. Idk how to finish, but i will post it soon.

Summary: You are a famous actress who was dating Gerard for about 2 years, but you haven't turned your relationship public yet, because of all the issues that this could bring to your career. However, you both were hired to some Comic-Con, and you don't know whether or not this is the right time to tell'em about it.

- Word Count: 1,905

- Warnings: Big age gap (again, 'cause I love it)

- Ps: I'll not use y/n…

- Ps2: I'm brazilian, so english is not my first language ... sorry if i wrote something wrong.

___________________________________________

1st person POV

   Being famous is such a complicated thing, and dating another celebrity is a mess. All the fear of how fans will react, and how the media will turn more invasive about our personal lives just freak us out. That's why Gerard and I keeped our relationship out of the lights for so long. 

    Yesterday, I got a call from my agent. She asked me if I was up for being one of the guests of the Comic-Con this year, together with my co-star, who had already agreed to participate. 

    Prior to answering anything, I had a mind to ask Gerard what he thinks about it, and if he wanted to go with me. 

    Before I could call him, my phone started to ring. I knew who was by the name of the contact, but hearing his voice always make butterflies in my stomach.

    -Hey, sugar! Got a sec? I need to ask you something. If you aren't busy, of course.

   - Hi, babe! Yeah, I was about to call you too… - I giggled a bit by the coincidence - But you go first. What's shakin’?

    The moment he started to talk, I got up from my bed and started to walk through my bedroom. I don't know why, but I do this every time I answer a call.

   -So… the staff of Comic-Con want me there to talk concerning Doom Patrol and meet some fans. - He sounded really excited and I couldn't help but let a smile grow on my face. - I was wondering if you'd like to go with me. 

   - Well… They want me there too, so I think we're going together though!

   - Really?! - He practically screamed at the phone. - That's awesome! 

   - You know, I was wondering if isn't this the moment to tell'em about us. - I started to speak and notice that I will have to be the most convincing I could. - Will be very suspicious if we appear together without an explanation, so I thought that the easier way to do this was to tell them. 

   The silence lasted for a few seconds, so the best thing I might think of to try to take all this pressure off him, was to show that I understood whatever his decision was. 

   - But if you don't think it's a good idea…

    I sounded the most calm I could. 

   - I wanna tell the world about you, about us, but… you know how this could end. - He sighed. - We kinda belong to different worlds, and the age gap doesn't help at all. 

    -You're right. Sorry… - I didn't know how to feel, half of me longed that he wanted to turn this public, but the other half are relieved he doesn't want to. - I must have been out of my mind and… Well, I have to tell my agent that I'm in. l call you back later? 

   - I'll have the rest of the day free. I'll be there so we can talk properly. What you think?

    “Talk properly”? About this? I thought that he was sure that wasn't a good idea. Even so, the prospect of seeing Gerard cheered me up. 

   -Sure! - The last time we could spend more than a dinner together was about a month ago. - You gonna stay here?

   - If you don't mind…

   - I'd love to! - I literally jumped for joy 

   - Gotta go now, catch you later, babe!

   - Bye! 

   He turned off the phone, and I called back my agent, confirming my presentear the Comic Con. 

   I couldn't wait till Gerard came here. Maybe it is a bit silly to be that excited about a simple thing like this, but we were so busy in the last months and barely had time for each other. Of course we call and text each other every day, but I miss the nights we spend together, laughing, cuddling and… you know

   Anyways, the sensation of waiting made me bored for the first time in years. I'm again overthinking over the conversation, and what “talk properly” means. 

   All the possible scenarios end up with a confused blur in my mind. The boredom gradually turned into an anguish that slowly consumed me.  

   Before things got worse, I heard the bell and went downstairs to open the door. The moment the creaking of the door echoed in my ears, I looked up only to meet his eyes. Standing in front of my door, Gerard looked pretty as always, the smell of coffee emanated from his green coat and all my worries left my mind when I felt his arms around my body.

   - Hey 

    Gerard’s calm voice in my ear and his warm arms holding me, made me feel better than I have in weeks. 

   - Hey 

    I mutter with my face buried in his chest. 

He let go from me, but still close, he held my chin with his finger and brought his lips closer to mine slowly. I felt a shiver down my spine when our lips finally met and he grabbed my hips pulling me even closer. I melted against him, letting myself get lost in the moment and forget that we weren't supposed to do that at the front door.

    Finally, we pulled back, breathless and slightly dazed, his kind gaze almost made me kiss him again.

   - I missed you - Ahead of i could do anything, Gerard looked deep in my eyes and all the colors of his iris were glowing. - I missed you so much fucking.

   - So did I - I smiled back at him and grabbed his hand. - Come in!

   I closed the door behind him, he gave me his coat and I put it on a hanger next to the door.    

   I took a record from my collection and put it on. while Gerard sit on the couch. As soon as the ambient music started, I fell by his side and stayed next to him. I laid my head on his shoulder and, with a heavy sigh, he began to bring up the subject that he wanted to “talk properly”.

    - So… about the call, I've been thinking - I couldn't read his gaze this time, so I felt my stomach doing a few flips and I started to get worried again. - I know that this is gonna have to happen someday, but now?

    - Well, it's a place full of fans, so I think that they'll support, Right? 

    I didn't move from his shoulder, so he wrapped his arm around my back. I never thought I'd be by my boyfriend's side, trying to figure out if we will or won't tell our fans that we're dating. Such a weird situation.

    - If they don’t? - I’m not used to the serious tone he used. - I mean, you’re half of my age… your fans will be a bit mad with this.

    - If they are real fans, they will understand that if i'm happy they have no reason to be mad. - I took a second to think of another possibility - On the other hand, reporters and gossip magazines will freak out over this, and probably the sensationalism will make our names trending topics.

    He moved his head to face me, and with a shy smile, he said:

    - I think you are worth the risk.

    I turned my gaze to him and smiled back:

    - Are you sure? 

    - Totally. - Gerard kissed my forehead, and his soft smile turned out that serious look again. - How will we do that?

    - Well, I'll have to answer some fans' questions and always someone asks me about relationships. I could bring you to the stage and formally introduce you.

    - Sounds like a plan to me.

*** time skip ***

   Today is gonna be the day. I dressed up in comfortable clothes, which matched the warm weather. Gerard and I decided to go in different cars, so people will know just when we tell’em. All the event is cool, pretty cosplays and kind people everywhere. I saw Gerard in the comics section, and a kilometer line of fans, waiting to get an autograph.

    On my way to the stage, I noticed that the presenter was talking with my co-star. He saw me and waved with a big smile on his face. We've worked together for eight seasons, and always had a strong friendship connection, even though our characters were each other's romantic interests.

    Finally, it was time to answer the fans' questions. So we, my co-star and I, went to the stage with microphones and bottles of water then we started. The first question was about the new season, the second was over my new haircut, but the third one was exactly the question I wanted to answer.

   - Hi! I’m Anna, and before asking you my question, I want to say that I'm a huge fan of both of you. I've watched your series like a hundred times. - The teen girl giggles and keeps talking. - And I also have a bunch of posters of you in my room. 

    - We’re happy to hear it! - He says, looking at the girl and smiling - What’s your question, Anna?

   - The question is for both of you. You have so much chemistry, why don't you both try dating?

    I looked at him and we laughed a bit.

    - We’re good friends. - He said, trying not to be rude with the girl - But I really don’t think we’d work together, you know. 

    - Yeah, and I also have a boyfriend for about two years. 

   I took a deep breath and got the courage to move my gaze from the girl to the crowd. I saw a lot of confused faces and shocked gazes. 

    - Neither did I knew that! - My co-star wasn’t that different from the rest of the people there. - Can we know who this mysterious guy is?

  - Guys, you really want to know? - I asked the crowd with a teasing tone. - ‘Cause he is right here backstage…  

     I pointed to the curtains behind me and the loud screams made me laugh. I walked through the people who take care of the sound and lighting on the stage, and found Gerard, who was looking at me with a fake confidence smile. 

    - You’re ready? 

    I standing my hand to him, he take it and after some instats he said: 

    - I think I'm alright. 

    Hand in hand, we walked back to the stage. I thought I was about to throw up, but as long as he was still with me, I'll be fine.

    - NO WAY! - My co-star said with wide eyes - I mean, literally “The Way”. 

    We laughed, but the crowd was still very confused.

    - So… guys, here’s my boyfriend, Gerard Way. 

    I gave a brief look to him and back to the fans, but I wasn't expecting what was coming.

    Gerard turned to me and held my face with his hands. I looked up at him, knowing what he was about to do. I wrapped my arms around his neck and we kissed, on the Comic-Con stage. 

    The sound of applause, along with screams and one or two isolated boos echoed throughout the event.  Some camera clicks were also audible. But we didn’t mind, and kept kissing until we lost our breath.

    - Now they know. 

   I whispered. smiling at him and a feeling similar to quickly removing a band-aid came over me. I think we can call this feeling relief.

    -  I think so - He smiled back and gave me a quick kiss. - What about now?

    - Now we wait till tomorrow, and check our social media. 

   I’ll not lie, I'm really nervous about it.

___________________________________________

~ So... that's it. lemme know if you enjoyed ;)

Part 2

[alysonsmandwes]

BSDecember day 2! "Snow"

For this prompt I wanted to write something bc I don't know how to draw snow lol. I guess it goes beyond saying but this isn't meant to be a ship, it's just two kids who never got to experience childhood. Also forgot to mention it's not beta read, and English isn't my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes.

“Atsushiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii” Dazai said, full of joy and emotion as he looked out the window. “Look at the snow! Isn’t it so beautiful?” He asked, gesturing towards the fluffy snowflakes falling outside the frosted glass.

Atsushi approached the window and looked through, noticing the ground around the agency, as well as the windowsills and ornamentation on the walls being gently covered with a thin layer of white. It was beautiful.

“I haven’t seen snow in a while…” he commented, his gaze softening and a small smile gracing his lips.

“Do you wanna go out and see the snow? I have a few ideas on how we could make the best of i-” Dazai was interrupted by a whack over the head from Kunikida, who used a heavy folder to kill Dazai’s ideas to go out and play. 

“Nonsense, you’re staying here.” Kunikida commented, his eyes narrowing at his companion.

“But Kunikidaaaaa!” Dazai whined. “I wanna-”

Another whack to the head shut him up immediately.

“No buts!” The blond man retorted firmly. “You always look for excuses to go out and avoid paperwork, leaving me with the whole load to myself! You’re doing paperwork and that’s final!” He commanded, and Dazai had no choice but to… whine and complain, which he did.

Atsushi observed the exchange between both companions and he rolled his eyes in slight amusement, before looking out the window once more, observing the light and fluffy snow falling to the ground.

Kunikida noticed Atsushi was looking out and, after letting out a heavy sigh, spoke up. “You can go out if you want, Atsushi, just make sure you finish everything you have to do before the end of the day.”

Atsushi tore his eyes away from the window and looked at Kunikida, surprise visible on his face.

“What?” Kunikida asked, arching an eyebrow and grunting, putting a folder down on his desk.

Atsushi chuckled and shook his head. “Nothing, thanks Kunikida.” he said, before getting up and walking out of the agency.

He walked down the stairs, his excitement palpable, and once he made it to the ground floor, he stumbled across Kyouka, who was coming back from an errand that she had been tasked with.

“Kyouka!” Atsushi exclaimed, approaching the young girl with a smile. “How was the errand?”

Kyouka looked up at him and nodded. “It was good.” she replied. “I got it done in time, but the weather started worsening and I just got back.”

Atsushi nodded in understanding, before grabbing his coat and draping it over his friend. “I’m glad it went well.”

Kyouka looked at him in confusion, but she didn’t refuse the coat. She was cold, after all, but what Atsushi asked right after made her dumbfounded.

“Want to look at the snow?” He offered, extending a hand out to her.

Kyouka seemed even more confused. Wasn’t he cold? And why would he want to look at the snow if he didn’t have a coat? “What?” she asked.

Atsushi chuckled a bit more. “I asked if you want to look at the snow! It’s been a while since I have seen it myself, and figured you’d like to look at it too.” He repeated his offer.

Kyouka nodded and walked alongside him, taking his hand in hers as they exited the front door and watched as the fluffy snowflakes covered the ground in white. People were out and about, coming back from shopping trips, playing in the snow, catching snowflakes, and doing many more things. Atsushi grabbed a handful of snow with his free hand and offered it to Kyouka. “Here, look at how it feels.”

Kyouka took the half melted snow into her hand and felt it, it was fluffy, obviously melting and cold. She was amused, how something so small like her hand could melt snow so quickly, and she watched as the cold droplets fell on the ground, which already had a few inches of snow and piling up. 

Atsushi observed her, before letting go of her hand. “Do you want to make mini snowmen?” he asked, squatting to grab some snow.

Kyouka nodded in delight, and copied Atsushi’s actions. 

After an hour or so, Kunikida exited the agency building, he was heading somewhere, but stopped in his tracks when he noticed Atsushi and Kyouka squatting right next to the agency’s building. He observed that they had made little snow sculptures, since the snow was not heavy enough to make snowmen the size of a person.

“What are you two doing?” he asked, looking closer at the little snow sculptures.

“The agency out of snow.” Kyouka replied, not looking at her superior and continuing.

Kunikida scanned the little sculptures, assuming the one with the chainsaw was Yosano, the one with the little hat was Kenji, the tall and short ones that were together were Fukuzawa and Ranpo, and so on. He stopped at one that clearly had glasses made out of twigs and a leaf on its “hand” was himself. He pointed at it. “Is that me?”

Kyouka nodded. “I made it myself.”

Kunikida adjusted his glasses and raised himself back up, hiding a smile with his hand, and once he composed himself, he walked away from the agency. “Remember to finish your paperwork like I asked.” he told his subordinates, as he walked away, and they watched him with a smile on their faces too.  @bsdecember

[kafus]

i really need to talk about why Gestalt is the perfect song to kick off Kaf's new era a little bit or i'm going to explode

talking about this requires some background knowledge and i'm aware most people who are going to read this probably don't know that much about Kaf so i'll talk about her history a little bit - Gestalt is Kaf's first solo release in a whole year. this is a considerably long time for her, and it's because the person who had been writing her songs for/with her for her entire career, Kanzaki Iori, left Kamitsubaki Studio early last year due to personal complications with himself as an artist (he is still on very good terms with Kaf and the rest of Kamitsubaki's staff!!)

additionally, Kaf's music with Kanzaki had always primarily been centered on various bittersweet and painful themes, but especially the pain of growing up/becoming an adult. this was especially pertinent because Kaf started Being Kaf when she was 14 years old, so she was singing from a place of genuine teenage angst. as she began to inch closer to adulthood and then became an adult herself, however, the feeling of her music shifted from singing about a far-off adult future, to an incredibly immediate one, with songs like her final song with Kanzaki, Kaikou, but especially Kyoukankaku which also came out during those last few months of Kanzaki being around. (i will spare you a whole ramble about these songs, you just have to take my word on the thematics up to this point lol. feel free to look into it further if you like)

so, Kanzaki leaving left Kaf in a bit of a limbo state for a while since so much of her musical identity was built off of her work with him and the topics they explored. she would need to form a new musical identity and figure out where to go from Kanzaki leaving... she spent about a year releasing her last songs with him as well as pumping out covers and collaboration songs with other musicians. but now, finally, she's back to releasing her own work! Gestalt was actually debuted at her KAIKA concert back in January, but only now has the studio release and full music video come out.

Gestalt is representational of her finally entering her new era after this big transitional period. even the official english description for Gestalt says:

KAF embarks on the next stage of her journey.

and oh boy does she!!!

Gestalt looks and feels like a super fun dance song in both the song itself and the MV. the description also says:

Over a year since KAF's last solo release, "Gestalt" is a 'killer dance tune' for the modern age.

and they're right. it is a killer dance tune. this shit slaps. but there's more to it than that.

it's immediately apparent when looking at the lyrics that there's more going on here - take this bit from the official english translation of the first verse for example:

From emotions to configurations When they start to break down I lose all understanding In so many ways Ahh I can't breathe Celebrating suffocation I can't take this

doesn't sound very fun or happy right? sounds chaotic. kaf is suffocating. she is losing her shit. but then it's followed up with:

Drop the beat! This disruptive Unnatural Forbidden gathering "Don't come here" "Don't look there" This is where it all starts to get good It's greedy Warped and twisted But hold me tight It's so hard to get it right, this losing game Seems like working together is the only way

to me, this is Kaf inviting the audience to dance with her amidst the chaos that she and all of us are suffocating in. the "unnatural and forbidden gathering" part is referring to how her and all of us are outcasts of society, how us trying to dance and experience joy while suffocating is looked at strangely. but the only way to survive in "this losing game" (of adult life) is to Work Together! be together!! dance together!!

that idea of being together in spite of suffering is the core message of the entire song, which is even brought out by its title, Gestalt. Gestaltism is essentially the idea that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts, that the whole is worth more than the individual components. both the title and the lyrics of the song emphasize togetherness and dancing as a whole.

this is already a much more optimistic take on those themes of Adulthood Hard and Life Is Pain, portrayed in a much peppier way than Kaf is generally used to. it's familiar, it feels like Kaf, but there's a new spin on it now! it really feels like Kaf is debuting her new era with explosive energy. it's very much "i lived bitch" to me - she's an adult now like she always dreaded being but despite it all she's dancing within the chaos and you should join her for that in this new era!!

but it actually goes deeper than that, because Kaf's MVs have always been made thoughtfully and usually pertain to the meaning of the song, and this one is no different. the animation also ties back into this transition and meaning.

^ these screencaps are from Gestalt (2024) and Just Forget About It (2019) respectively. both music videos were directed by Kawasaki Kenji, who worked on most of Kaf's older music videos and was the person who defined her visual style for a good portion of her career. older Kaf MVs almost always had some element of Kaf existing in real life environments, like some sort of alien girl wandering the streets of Tokyo. she was often put into very mundane locations with a good amount of wide shots, creating this ethereal feeling.

well, Kenji implements those themes into Gestalt for sure... a lot of the MV feels like an older Kaf MV. but there's a couple MAJOR differences...

instead of just idling around and looking wistful like in her older videos, she is DANCING!! and the usual typography in her videos is extremely stylized and much more colorful than usual, plus the environments are decorated with a ton of colorful and overlapping shapes breaking up the relatively mundane and even melancholic looking environment (for the record, "gestalt" is also a type of visual design involving closed shapes, so the typography and shape language here also ties into the title of the song lol).

essentially what they've done here is draw back on the Kaf everyone knows and loves but gone hey, now it's colorful and explosive and high energy! this is new, too!! which is exactly what the song is trying to do as well! familiar themes but portrayed in a completely new light

and as one last aside, it is also worth mentioning real quick that Kaf's current outfit for the year or so, Raichou, was debuted at her concert in January where this song was also debuted, and while not specific to Gestalt, her character designer PALOW really made sure to change how Kaf looks a lot more than usual this time for her new era. Kaf has a new main look every year or so and those outfits can define entire eras for her, and usually they're darker and heavier on the blue, but Raichou is nearly devoid of any blue and has a very different feel. they even changed her hair to be cut flat, something she hasn't done before.

anyways TLDR; my takeaway from Gestalt is i'm dancing with Kaf in this new era amidst the world being on fire so hard. joy and whimsy in the face of suffering bitch‼️get ready because Kaf is going to keep making banger music in new ways the likes of which we have never seen!!! this song is literally a perfect transitional song drawing on Kaf of old and bringing her into the new. absolutely genius. Piedpiper has done it again. thank you Jazzin'park for your service

[agaypanic]

Can you write for Rory where he has like a pen pal for a school project. They both talk to each other ALL the time and he's really excited that he made a new friend! One day the reader tells him she's coming to visit and he gets all excited telling the gang about her and over all just that huge buddle of joy he always is! Well..obv he doesn't know what she looks like because they talk through letters. So when this absolute buddle of cuteness and rainbows randomly runs up to asking about and just rambling on and on about how he's her pen pal he just crushes her with a hug and just can't believe she's really their! And just ends all cute maybe throw in some flustered and blushy moments too if you can!!

My Pen Pal (Rory Keaner X Reader)

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Summary: Rory’s English class is assigned pen pals from the high school in a neighboring town. You and him hit it off right away, quickly realizing that this new friendship should go beyond letters.

A/N: open ending bc i didn’t really know how to end it lol

***

Rory must have been the only one in his class excited to have to do a pen pal project. He liked making new friends, especially since it came relatively easy to him. He was just the type of boy who could get along with anyone.

When you first started talking to Rory, you just viewed it as another assignment. You each had to write five letters, one letter being sent every week. But your thoughts quickly changed when he responded to your first letter. He seemed funny and nice, so easy to talk to.

Rory thought the same about you. You were so sweet in your letters, always giving thoughtful responses to what he had previously sent, and he tried to do the same in his letters. You two had so much in common: the same taste in media, opinions on different topics, how you would survive a zombie apocalypse if the day ever came.

During the last week of sending letters, you and Rory grew sad when you realized the assignment would soon end. While talking to each other, you didn’t think about the fact that your conversations would someday come to an end.

But then you remembered that Rory lived in the next town over. You could easily see him and continue talking if you really wanted to. So, in your last letter to Rory, you asked if he would ever want to meet and talk in person. If yes, he should describe what he looked like so he’d be easy to find.

Rory was absolutely ecstatic to read your letter. He said that he couldn’t wait to see you, giving you his description and telling you the best time and place to meet.

“Rory, I didn’t know you knew how to write.” Erica joked as she watched him scribble feverishly on paper.

“Who are you writing to, Rorster?” Benny asked.

“My pen pal, Y/n!” Rory took a break from writing to look up at his friends, smiling brightly as he thought about you. “We’re finally planning to meet in person! She’s so nice; I can’t wait to meet her.” Then he got back to writing, trying to decide where you should meet. “Hey, is the park a good place to meet someone for the first time?”

***

Before he knew it, the weekend had come, and Rory was sitting on a bench at the park, waiting for you. He convinced his friends to go with him, to calm his nerves while he waited and to comfort him if you never showed. But he knew you would come.

“So, what should we look out for, Rory?” Ethan asked, looking around. A few people were scattered around the park, but they probably weren’t who Rory was looking for. “What does this girl look like?”

“Well-” Rory cut himself off, trying to think. Only then did it occur to him that you hadn’t given him a description for him to look for. You knew what he looked like, but that was it. “...I don’t know.”

“What do you mean you don’t know?” Erica asked, crossing her arms. “You didn’t think to ask?”

“It slipped my mind!

“Well, she knows what you look like, right?” Sarah asked, and Rory nodded. “Then I guess we just wait for her to find you.”

“But that could take forever!” Rory knew he was exaggerating. But he had been waiting for what felt like forever to see you; the fact that he had to wait for you to find him first made him even more impatient. 

“Don’t worry, Rory. She should be here soon.” Benny said, checking his watch. “You told her to meet you here at three, and it’s-”

“Rory?” An unfamiliar voice came from behind the boy. He whipped his head around and looked at a girl who was looking at him hopefully, playing with her fingers. He stood up from the park bench.

“Y/n?” Hearing him say your name made you squeal, and you couldn’t help but run up and hug him. Rory gripped your waist tightly, jumping around in excitement with you in his arms, making you laugh. “I can’t believe you’re actually here!” He set you down but kept his arms around you, trying to take in every detail.

“Of course, I’m here! I couldn’t wait to see you.” You caught a glimpse of Rory’s friends watching your interaction and giggled at their stunned reactions. They probably didn’t think that you were actually real, or that you’d be so excited to see Rory. “Wanna introduce me to your friends?”

As if suddenly remembering his friends were there, even though he made them come in the first place, he turned to face them. He introduced everyone to you, and you waved excitedly.

His friends could sense that the two of you should have some alone time. After all, this meeting was for the two of you to finally hang out.

“You know…” Sarah stood up and walked to you, placing a hand on your and Rory’s shoulders and turning you toward the other direction. “There’s a really good ice cream shop down the street. Perfect for hanging out and first dates and stuff.”

You and Rory lit up at the suggestion. Quickly thanking Sarah and saying goodbye to everyone else, you and Rory practically dragged each other out of the park and to the shop. You talked the whole way there, trying to plan the rest of your first day together.

[a-canceled-stamp]

20 Questions for Writers

Thank you @motleyfam, @crows-murder and @selkienight60 for the tags! ^.^

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

22

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

157,488

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mostly DC, but Star Wars, Marvel, Malevolent (Podcast), Good Omens, and MHA make appearances too.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Long Way Down (To The Bottom Of The River)

Then Came the Morning

A Leap of Faith

Talk To Me

There Are Softer Oak Trees

5. Do you respond to comments?

I used to respond to every comment fairly quickly but recently I just haven't had the time :(( I appreciate every single comment though, they bring me such joy 🥹

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

That would be cardboard box - the first (sort of) hurt no comfort I've written >:D

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably There Are Softer Oak Trees :)))

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do!!!! Or...I'm giving it a shot at least. Not for DC, but for Malevolent. Might post something real soon :3

10. Do you write crossovers?

Nope!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I didn't even know this was a thing before today. That being said, I don't think so??

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I would love to collab sometime :3

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I cannot pick one because I don't really have A favorite. But Stucky (Marvel), DinLuke (Star Wars), Merthur (Merlin), SuperBat (DC), TimKon (DC) and Science Girlfriends (Orphan Black) are all ships I enjoy.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

Dying Is Easy, Living Is Harder. I have many ideas for it but unfortunately, I'm not obsessed enough about the characters to fulfill them lmao. Also An Unexpected Visit bc similar to the previous one I have a lot of ideas, but I just don't think I am talented enough to actually write those ideas.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I've rewritten this answer 10 times, but no version felt right. At one point, I decided I was just gonna skip it. BUT NO. I'm gonna stop worrying about other peepz opinions and just say what I actually believe. And here it is.

I know how to make my writing more immersive with various details like sounds, smells, sensations etc. (and I LOVE doing this. The only issue is I sometimes do it either too much or too little ahdjkhsd)

I am VERY nitpicky. This can seem more like a flaw (and it is), but it has also helped me grow and understand what I like and dislike about my writing. It also means I spend a lot of time editing which makes posting SO much more satisfying (tho sometimes I gotta get those shorter fics out there for the instant serotonin boost lol)

I'm not a huge fan of characters who say/do things that don't make sense considering the genre/plot. Spending more time on this is challenging since I both dislike and SUCK at writing dialogue (why is English so HARD??), but it is also a lot of fun bc I think I am getting better at it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Well, that part about being nitpicky is obviously a lie bc I didn't realize question 17 was gone ahdjshdkj. But I was the one who noticed it first among my friends so...maybe? Nope lol

English grammar. I have to double check every time I write a message to online friends to make sure what I've written is actually a sentence that makes sense.The thing is - I think I'm pretty good, but I actually suck. One time, I wrote mold wine instead of mulled wine in a fic. Never living that down. This is I think why it takes me so long to edit lmao.

Being too harsh on myself and not allowing myself to feel proud about my accomplishments/comparing my writing to other people. Yes, compared to other fantastic writers I suck, and it will always be like that. It's something I'm still struggling to accept, but I'm getting there!

Writing quickly. Like shutting off my brain and just writing doesn't work for me. I have to be there and edit every single sentence that I don't like, and I think this is why it takes so long for me to finish the first draft. Def gotta work on this!

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Hmm. Instinctively, I think it makes more sense to write something like, "Person A said something in a language I didn't understand" than to write in that language. It's more fun that way. And if both the pov character and I don't understand what Person A saying it makes me sympathize with the pov character more.

That being said, if I ever see someone writing in Swedish in a fic, I will be immensely happy (and horrified)

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Rise of the Guardians on ffn. The fic is still there and is still hot garbage, but I did have a lot of fun writing it.

20. Favourite fic you've written?

I know what my LEAST favorite one is hjkahdsjk. Nah but for real, I love all my fics for very specific reasons. Like I have a sort of emotional connection with all of them depending on where I was in life, how I was feeling emotionally at the time, etc.

My top 3 would probably be Long Way Down (To The Bottom Of The River) bc it was the first fic I put a lot of thought and effort into, There Are Softer Oak Trees bc it makes me soft and fuzzy when I think about it, and cardboard box bc the comments made me fkn cackle.

It feels impossible to tag people who haven't been tagged yet but imma go with @miles2g0, @lurkinglurkerwholurks, @they-reap-what-we-sow, @liverobinreaction, and @bonesbuckleup. No pressure ofc!

[20001541]

You know, in AFO's place, I would have really been very angry with Yoichi and felt betrayed, not wanting to justify any of the atrocities that AFO committed, but Yoichi only had the opportunity to live and be good because AFO did the dirty work for them to survive, All for one provided (in his view) everything to Yoichi and while Yoichi contributed nothing other than his presence, and when things are finally working out, and even after giving him a Quirk, he goes there and abandons you, and joins his enemies who would kill you if they had the chance, regardless of whether Yoichi was right or wrong, in AFO's position I would feel devastated and would be very angry, from AFO's perspective it looks like he spat on the plate he eat

I think it's ironic that as a child afo viewed yoichi as something that was weak and provided him with nothing, kept around solely because he viewed him as a possession. only for him to later spend the majority of his life chasing after his quirk as it was one of the few pieces left of him, he even kept his severed hand after he died. then he spends his last moments finally admitting that he needs yoichi.

and yeah I can see how afo would feel this way, but at the same time he kind of dug his own grave there. he treated and viewed yoichi as something he owned and while official english translation left it out, afo said his dream was for everyone in the world to exist for his sake just like yoichi does which just goes to show how he views yoichi as a person, just someone who lives for afo and afo alone. 😬

also remembering this panel from 408 where the left side is how yoichi was living with afo while the right is how he lived with kudou and bruce. just look how much better his living situation got once he was away from afo. and yoichi knows what afo has done for him "you kept me alive", he just wishes afo would stop treating people like expendable things. that's literally all he wants from afo, to stop hurting others for personal gain.

and afo just expected yoichi to just shut up and follow him as he's always had once he declared his dream, but yoichi just wasn't going to do that anymore lol. which resulted in the vault, and forced isolation for long periods of times is a form of psychological torture. fandom jokes about it a lot, but it's extremely screwed up what afo did just to get yoichi to join him.

but I believe afo truly did want to connect with yoichi on an interpersonal level, but he was unable to because of the way he grew up, learning only to get what he wants by force so he tried that with yoichi (forcing him to stay by his side and conform to his ideals, not wanting to let him go and try to be his own person, only what afo wanted him to be) and all it did was push yoichi further and further away. quite tragic really.

I think it says a lot in how yoichi was willing to run away with strangers that for all he knows could be planning to hurt him later on as a way to get to afo rather than stay with the brother he's known all his life. just shows how unbearable afo's controlling nature was. it's not easy to leave everything you've known behind, but he had to do it for his own sake. afo was only getting worse.

so yeah I don't think afo should've been surprised at the fact that yoichi refused to look back at him when he was running with the rebels in the sewers, too bad yoichi had to pay for afo's own jealousy with his life.

it's not like vestige yoichi takes joy in seeing afo being beaten, you can see him though the fight looking almost sad that it has to come to this. maybe in a different world they could've been happy.