#being eaten by my insane little snails

[little-pondhead]

[gemsofgreece]

Bad Boys of the Greek Cuisine

Everyone’s taste is different but the Greek Cuisine is generally acknowledged as a very tasty cuisine with both European and Middle Eastern influences. Not only that but it is considered one of the healthiest diets in the world with one of its branches, the Cretan diet, taking the first place the last time I checked. The secret of this cuisine’s success lies on the use of top quality and very fresh products and not so much on the use of many or unusual ingredients. However, that’s not to say that the Greek cuisine does not come with its fair share of extreme dishes. Here are some of them: Πατσάς - Patsás Patsas is a tripe soup / stew aka a stew made of stomach. It looks innocent and it is usually eaten as a comfort food but the cooking process smells like the name sounds... In Greece, there are shops called Patsatzídika that stay open until way past midnight and offer exclusively this dish and they are preferred after a lot of alcohol consumption. I had to remove the picture because I had eleven in this post and Tumblr sucks. I removed Patsas because it is the most normal looking one. Χοχλιοί μπουμπουριστοί - Hochlií buburistí Probably the Greek dish with the hardest name, at least for me. It is a traditional dish of Crete island but you can enjoy it all around Greece, provided that you are eager to eat... snails.

Κοκορέτσι - Kokoretsi Kokoretsi is a roasted dish made of animal intestines, livers and lungs served in slices. While this name does not originate from the Greek language, the dish was already loved by the Byzantine Greeks who called it “Chordae” meaning cords. The dish is hard to be prepared as it is necessary that the intestines are very carefully cleaned with tools such as pencils and knitting needles. In Greece it is often served at Easter.

Σπληνάντερο - Splinándero It is what its name means: Spleen and Large Bowel. Plus heart. From old sheep and goats. Also served at Easter because apparently Greeks go feral during Easter.

Μαγειρίτσα - Mayiritsa Another Easter classic, served during the Holy Saturday, Mayiritsa is a liver and heart soup. It’s certainly not for the faint of... nose such as me who I had to leave the house as my mum was cooking it. This is why recently a new type of Mayiritsa is trending, which replaces the organs with mushrooms and it is ideal for vegetarians and people with a sensitive nose. Nevertheless, most people love traditional Mayiritsa. Once I found an ice cream shop in Thessaloniki serving a mayiritsa flavour. What the heck.

By they way we have like another gazillion intestine dishes for some unknown reason but I will skip them to make this post more varied. Αχινοί - Raw Urchins This is a delicacy to several sea cuisines around the world. Greece is one of them. Recipe: go to a beach with clear waters, look for an urchin, hold it carefully, cut the living urchin in half with a knife and pour fresh lemon juice on it. That's it, that's the recipe.

Χταπόδι - Octopus This is by no means an extreme food in Greece but I include it here because I was surprised to find out it is nowhere as common in most countries and people often have a strong reaction to it. Well, in Greece we only have a reaction of fierce love for it. Octopus is used in several Greek dishes but the most iconic is probably grilled octopus marinated in vinegar often served with Greek sauerkraut salad. Seafood restaurants often hang fresh fished octopuses outside their shops and let them dry in the sun. It is a classic image of Greece and a sign the restaurant offers very fresh products. It was literally grabbed from the sea and flung to your face, top that level of freshness if you can.

Σπινιάλο - Spinialo Spinialo is a traditional seafood dish originating from the island of Kalymnos. The dish consists of fouskes, sea squirts that are marinated in a bottle of seawater. These primitive marine vertebrates usually attach themselves to shells and rocks, and when cut in half, fouskes reveal a soft flesh with a strong and bitter flavor and a texture that's similar to scrambled eggs.

Αρνί στη σούβλα - Skewered lamb If you are in anyway familiar with Greece, you probably know what the main event of our Easter feasts is. Roasting a whole skewered lamb. I imagine people freaking out at that. But, hey, it's a huge part of our tradition. And don't mind me saying, it bloody tastes insane. It's funny that in 27 years of life, now that I'm typing this in English, it is the first time it occurs to me that some people could potentially find this weird.

Πεσκανδρίτσα - Angler fish This hideous fish is eaten in two ways. Its...uhm... head is a common ingredient of Greek fish soups. I am personally not that much into soups or fish but let me tell you and sign this as well: this unassuming fellow has the most delicious tail. Its tail is called Μπρασκοουρά (Braskourá) and is heaven when fried. Don't look at it, just read my words and trust them.

Κεφαλάκι σούπα - Head soup The name sounds too generic but at least it is only about (poor) goats and sheep. This dish is getting a little too extreme for young Greeks but in my parents' generation, parents would chase the children to eat the eyes because that supposedly made you clever. The tongue was enjoyed too. Anyway, I'll spare you of a graphic image.

I am loth to end this fantastic post but the new BETA mode I am on forbids more than 10 pictures (that’s the actual reason I did not add a head soup picture and not that I am kind-hearted) so I'm gonna end this with the weirdest type of meat we eat. Like I said above, some things here might look a bit much, but when it comes to the types of meat Greeks eat, we really don't like taking the uncommon path. Greek cuisine is more mellow than extreme. Ironically, Greeks eat meats well done or medium at most because they are squeamish at the idea of eating bloody or remotely raw meat. So they eat a load of bowels and heads that stare at your soul but at least they are cooked for, like, 6 hours, you know, to ensure they are absolutely dead. Greeks typically devour eat farm animals, poultry, boars and a few commonly hunted birds, almost all fish and seafood. They also eat rabbits and hares (would that be considered uncommon? IDK) but that's where it ends. For instance, deer can be found in Greek supermarkets but nobody wants to eat such a gorgeous being and if you eat horse intentionally, you might as well get kicked out of the country (exaggeration but still). So, farm mammals, a few birds, fish and seafood. And snails. That's all. Oh! And- Βατραχοπόδαρα - Frog legs Frog legs is a traditional delicacy of the mountainous lakeside city of Ioannina. It is the only region of Greece where frogs are eaten. It is a tasty looking dish and those who have tried it say it actually tastes a lot like chicken. Actually sign me up for this. I mean, look at that. Why the hell not?

Now I wonder how many people decided to all of a sudden not travel to Greece and how many decided to come just now. And I wonder what that nice Anon who complimented my delicious food posts thinks now. But remember, Greek cuisine might have some bad boys but it also has many good good gooooood ones.

[gabrieldrawsstuff]

Aight fellas, I'm doing a list of canon descriptions of dw characters for future reference, might do a second part with more minor characters

SPOILER ALERT OBV

STRANGER

-THE JOURNAL : "Somehow I'm wearing a coat, so I must've changed my clothes on my way here. I don't recognize myself anymore. I can barely hold this pencil. Has my body changed?"

-DOCTOR : "I see you haven't regained your speech. You need to find another doctor."

-SNAIL : "Your face... What happened to you?

The snail's jaw falls so low, it almost detaches itself from the rest of the body.

You scared me... You barely resemble a human... You should cover yourself..."

SNAIL : "You're so ugly, I feel like puking... You barely resemble a human being..."

THE CRIPPLE : "You, lad. You've got your hands and legs. Strong arms. I beg you!"

MAMA ELEPHANT : "Can't you speak? Did someone take away your voice?"

MAMA ELEPHANT : "Your gob looks like that because of this fiendish air, do you know? I bet you can't speak, because you didn't keep your mouth shut when walking through the woods."

MAMA ELEPHANT : "(...) I know you want something, you leper demon."

MUSHROOM GRANNY : "(...) But you're young and strong."

CHICKEN LADY : "Whaddaya need, poor soul? Hungry, eh? I'd give ya some stew, but what good will it do?"

(I think in polish version it was closer to 'how will you eat it' although I can't be sure)

MIRROR : "You are one ugly bastard. I guess you got what you deserved."

MUSICIAN : "This is our doctor, yes? He is just as brave and good as you are!"

MUSICIAN : "You're not af-fraid of anything!"

WOLFMAN : "Even from afar I can smell your putrid stench. Be glad I don't have an appetite for carcasses, Meat"

WOLFMAN : (after the church dream sequence) "Meat, what's with the big eyes? Hehe... Scared?"

WOLFMAN : (when you nod to a question if you're making a joke of him) "You're a brave piece of meat... and what's more important, one with a sense of humor. 

WOLFMAN : "Are you pretending to be human, or are you just cracking jokes?"

WOLFMAN : "You look tired, Meat. Busy night?"

WOLFMAN : "Have fun, Meat... Just remember to hide that disaster of a face or it's no dancing for you"

WOLFMAN : (when you spare the sow) "My heart sings with joy when I see such selfless kindness. Tell me the truth, Meat. It was you, wasn't it?"

vvvvv

TRADER

-A man, roughly my size, is standing before me.

I can barely make out his disturbingly familiar features through the matte visor of his helmet...

The massive helmet is covered with an old sack and seems to be an integral part of the unnaturally pale body.

-The man reaches out to me with his black hand. It's covered in charcoal... There's something written on his worn, woolen glove.

-Visibly struggling, the man drops the sack from his back and bends in half, as if out of breath. He shakes the dust off his clothes, then rolls up the sleeve of his, seemingly too small, jacket. 

-The old sack covering his body slides down, revealing his chest, covered in horrid growths. It is fused with a porous helmet, pulsating to the rhythm of his breath.

vvvvv

WOLFMAN

THE JOURNAL: "If I'm not delusional, the man whom I met... had the head of a wolf."

FIRST ENCOUNTER: The figure hides its face under the hood. It smells of wet soil and fur.

WOLFMAN: "(...)I barely believe my beautiful eyes... (...) The Wolf smiles, revealing a row of sharp teeth.

AT BARN RUINS: The Wolf makes a quick leap and, bouncing against me with his swollen belly, he puts his paws on my shoulders. He ostentatiously licks his face. (...)

-I notice fresh bloodstains on his fur and feel streaks of his saliva dripping onto my coat. 

-The Wolf takes two steps back. I can only see a row of filthy, sharp teeth underneath his hood.

-The Wolf squeezes my arms and starts licking my face. Once from the left side, once from the right side. (...) His breath stinks of rot.

WOLFMAN: "Thanks to you I feel fulfilled! I got my girl, my sweet little lady back."

-Suddenly the Wolf sends me back with a powerful push and reaches into his coat pocket.

WOLFMAN: "(...) and then nothing wil keep you from getting the fuck out of my part of the woods! Do you get me, Meat? You will pack your bags, dive into that stinking hole of yours and dissa-fucking-pear!"

-Finally he snorts, his thick, yellow spit landing on the photo.

-The Wolf grabs the box and starts sniffing it from every angle. I could swear I've heard his tail moving under his coat.

WOLFMAN: "And what am I supposed to do with it? Bite it until it opens? Your brain must be rotting if you think I will break my fangs for this shit."

WOLFMAN: "An electronic game, eh? About a wolf stealing chicken eggs... hehehe. Good one!I've a soft spot for games, how about you?"

-As I produce the key, the Wolf's pupils widen with excitement.

WOLFMAN: (about villagers) "Those selfish, deceitful wretches! They think they're superior, because they have human gobs. They treat us like lepers! But you know what? Fuck them. We're buddies, aren't we? And them? They deserve to be punished, Meat..."

-The Wolf pierces me with his look and grins. A string of saliva lands on his hole-riddled jacket.

-The Wolf puts his paw on me. I can feel his claws puncturing my skin.

WOLFMAN: (about piotrek) "Meat! Fucking hell, seen that? Hahaha! Seen that? Hahaha! Off he flew, didn't he? OFF HE FUCKED!!! Hahahaha!"

WOLFMAN: "If you wish to spend some more quality time basking in the striking, yet natural beauty of my features before you head off to the Silent Forest, you will find me in my camp in the Dry Meadow."

vvvvv

DOCTOR

THE JOURNAL: "What I do know is that the insane fucker took my key. My only chance to get out of the woods. He also tore out all the pages from my journal."

THE JOURNAL: "The doctor has escaped. So be it. He would only be a hindrance anyway."

CHICKEN LADY: "My sisters! Where did ya find it? It's all that godless quack's fault - devil brought him! All he did was prescribe this and that, scribble this no-good drivel! To hell with them papers!"

-I can feel the doctor's cold hand grab me by the jaw, (...)

-He removes his dirty glasses with a trembling hand and freezes.

DOCTOR: "First they begged for help, now I need to hide from them! I'm just an ordinary doctor! How the fuck was I supposed to help them?! How?!"

-With shaking hands, he reaches for the cigarrete butt between his yellow teeth.

DOCTOR: "I used to come here to treat people. I pulled out kids' milk teeth, delivered babies... (...) Last time I came here was three or four years ago. Then the trees blocked the path."

-The Doctor is visibly pleased with himself and his theory. His hands are no longer trembling. He produces a hand-rolled cigarette and lights it.

DOCTOR: "(...) I have no idea where it leads. I'm a shitty diver. (...)"

-The Doctor stares right into my eyes. Mud drips from his face. He hasn't blinked in over a minute.

- (...)His glasses are so dirty, I barely see the eyes hiding underneath.

-A chunk of mud falls down on his exposed tongue. He chews it slowly and swallows with satisfaction.

-The Doctor puts the muddy hand into his mouth, grimaces and pulls out a yellow tooth. He puts it into the pocket of his torn trousers. The tooth falls through a hole. He does not notice this...

-Slowly he bends down and grabs a thick branch from the ground. He starts biting the bark off of it. He swallows the bark with an effort, but also great satisfaction. He places the stick among other ones sticking out of his mud-covered head.

WOLFMAN: "Well, well. I know this quack. A nonentity, a third-rate witch doctor. Useless fucking clunker... But he still managed to screw you over with that key. Eh, comrade?"

MUSICIAN: "This is our doctor, yes? He is just as brave and good as you are! He helped me. He is helping all of us! He gave me this beautiful mask, so I could be healed of my afllictions. Maybe you could have one too..."

vvvvv

vvvvv

MUSICIAN

THE JOURNAL: "I met a boy in the village. He told me that the "Chicken Lady" keeps the "Pretty Lady" locked in her house. The boy really wants to see her, but the old woman won't allow it."

THE JOURNAL: "I decided to give the key to Chicken Lady's room to the little boy. He thanked me and asked me to bring him his mom's violin (it's hidden behind the wardrobe). He's afraid to go himself, as his parents are supposedly angry with him."

THE JOURNAL: "The boy sure was happy to see the new violin. (...)The kid also told me I should visit him in his parent's home someday."

CHICKEN LADY: (after musician's death) "Maybe it's just that me ears are getting worse, but it's been a while since I've heard that monster outside me windows..."

CHICKEN LADY: "Holy Mother, this creep again! May the devil take him and his blasted violin!"

MUSICIAN: "The Pretty Lady? S-she's... the most beautiful lady in the w-world! I w-watch her through the cracks in the window. S-she ch-changes when I watch her... g-gets more beautiful. I p-play for her... I want her to be h-happy..."

MUSICIAN: "I fished out the Pretty Lady's w-wreath from the river! (...)Oh yes, I will become the Pretty L-lady's husband! We w-will walk hand in hand, s-sir. I will play for her, mister s-sir."

-A skinny little hand emerges from beneath the tractor and grabs me by the ankle.

MUSICIAN: "They will not l-listen to me, they w-won't hear how sad I am, sir..."

-One of the strings securing his mask falls off, together with his ear. The boy reattaches it as if nothing happened.

MUSICIAN: "My m-mom has this beautiful violin! I would ask her to b-borrow it to me, but she's too angry with me... Could you p-please c-convince her to b-borrow it to me? I'll g-give you a card with drawings for her. To apologize."

-The boy turns the game in his hand for a while, but he can't find a way to reach the buttons with his overgrown fingers. The game slips out of his hand and drops to the ground. The wannabe musician freezes.

MUSICIAN: "(...) maybe you could take a wee piece of... m-meat for me? I've never eaten a pig and I've h-heard it's very tasty! W-would you take s-some for me?"

-The boy sniffles and rubs the mask with his deformed hand.

-From beneath the mask you can hear a horribly distorted, resounding voice... of a child?

-The figure tries to turn its head, but its enormous neck makes this task impossible to complete.

MUSICIAN: "P-please let me stay. P-please, don't chase me off. I've got nowhere to... go. The villagers don't a-a-allow me to live in the camp. I p-p-promise I won't p-play anymore! I'll be quiet. You can c-cover me with something, if you don't w-want to look at m-me..."

MUSICIAN: (after gifting you a rat) "(...) I mean, she jumped on my hand and s-started nibbling on my f-finger! I quickly clasped my h-hand and b-bit through its neck!"

-The corners of the boy's mouth turn up in a grotesque smile, exposing rows of overgrown teeth, which even his mask couldn't hide.

-The boy clumsily grabs the ball in his hand. He carefully hides it under his legs, so that it doesn't roll away.

MUSICIAN: "S-sorry! I didn't want to! T-this thing is coming out of m-my body. I... I tried to stop it, but I don't think I can... N-now the whole room is covered with... this. I didn't want to make a mess, I s-swear! Please, don't t-throw me a-away!"

-The boy leans over the violin lying next to his overgrown left hand. He plucks one of the strings with his right hand, clumsily trying to keep the rhythm.

MUSICIAN: "Recently, I've grown quite a bit. My mom always used to say that I need to be b-big and s-strong... to help her out in the field..."

The boy tries to hug his frail knees with the disproportionately massive torso.

"But I... I don't want to be big anymore. It's v-very hard being big. You need to be so... so strong! To even walk.Now my v-violin is... too s-small for me!"

vvvvv

vvvvv

[doof-doofblog]

"You Can't Even Say It, Can You?!"

Double Episode Post

Monday 29th March 2021 - Tuesday 30th March 2021

Hello again everyone! Hope you're week is going well so far! I apologise for being so late, but this post is going to cover this week's Monday and Tuesday episodes, that way I will be completely up to date! Unfortunately I do have plans for the rest of the week so I probably won't be posting again until next Monday, where of course I'll post double episode posts just to make sure I've caught up with you all! I just want to say thank you for your patience and support, it really does mean the world!

Anyway, let's jump straight into it, so much drama happening right now! The first thing I have to mention first is Whitney, Kush and Gray! After the way Gray had spoken to them the night before, but Whitney and Kush appear to be discussing Gray's behaviour. Kush completely believes that Gray was out of order for talking to Whitney the way he did, especially considering she's been at his every beckon call looking after his kids over the last few months! But Whitney seems to stick up for her friend, claiming that he's been through a tough time and it's understandable why he'd be stressed out. I'm glad that Kush is slowly noticing Gray's flaws, only ever so slightly though!

Later on, Whitney goes to visit Gray but interestingly before she arrives we see Gray pull out some kind of piece of jewellery from his blazer pocket, at first I wasn't too sure what this was for, was it Chantelle's? Was it the piece of jewellery that had gone missing? Or was it for something else completely?! As Whitney finally arrives, Gray happens to mention that he has a work Gala event to go go, but he doesn't appear to be in the mood, considering he used to go with Chantelle every year. Oooooo Gray is really good manipulator isn't he?! It's blatantly obvious that he's dropping hints, informing Whitney that he doesn't want to go, so of course Whitney offers to attend the event with him and be his plus one, and of course Gray is ever so thankful and appreciative of her for suggesting such a thing, but what else makes it more creepy - when Whitney mentions she has nothing to wear for the event so Gray give her one of Chantelle's dresses to wear!

As Whitney is at home getting changed, Kush walks in to find her wearing the dress. Needless to say she does look stunning in it, but as Whitney admits it's actually Gray's deceased wife's dress she's wearing, makes her feel incredibly uncomfortable! I mean it's no secret that Gray has fallen for Whitney, but is it some kind of twisted ploy to replace Chantelle?! Who knows?! Kush is absolutely baffled when he learns about the dress and states that Gray must be going insane! What normal person would do such a thing?! But regardless of the slight concern, Whitney still tries her best to stick up for Gray, claiming that he's still a grieving man and dealing with a lot of stress. Kush seems to understand that his girlfriend is just doing Gray a favour, which of course she is - little do they know that it means something more for Gray.

Ooooh so the piece of jewellery that Gray had earlier he had actually bought for Whitney?! Was this all part of his plan? Or was it only going to be an apology gift for the way he spoke to her the previous night?! Gosh, my mind is asking all sorts of questions! Don't you guys find it incredibly creepy?! It's like Gray almost has this slight obsession with Whitney and knowing that she's dating Kush, seems to really grate on him! It's almost as if he can't have her, no one can! Eventually Gray and Whitney make their way to the Gala event, and it seems as if everyone's eyes are turned towards Whitney, but not so much in a good way. Not even a year after his wife's death - technically, it's only been just over 6 months - people are concerned that Gray has moved on ever so quickly from his deceased wife, plus the fact that Whitney was once his client makes it even more weird!

One of the main highlights for me was during the event, it was clear to see that Whitney was getting bored of out her skull! As she spots Gray speaking with colleagues, she approaches him claiming that she's been doing the "Signal" for a good while, but Gray pathetically apologises claiming that he thought she'd just had an itchy nose! It's clear that she isn't enjoying herself and has concerns about people staring at her! But the most brilliant part of that scene was the look on Whitney's face after realising what she had just eaten after being offered a canape' - snail!!!!! That was a hilarious and a very relatable moment, brilliant acting from Shona McGarty! She's truly brilliant!  

After a small chat with Gray and a quick goodbye, Whitney finally leaves the event - much to her relief, but to her surprise, Kush is sat outside the club waiting for her. As they share a portion of chips together on the side of the road, it's funny to see how comfortable they are together as Whitney lets out a burp! It's a funny moment which they both laugh at, even though I never saw this connection before, it's clear to see that they feel truly comfortable with each other, it's a relationship that I never thought I'd actually enjoy, but yes Kush and Whitney have always been good friends, but being in a relationship - it just works! As they continue to laugh at Whitney's actions, Kush makes an interesting response that they're like an old married couple - now this is what I didn't see coming - Whitney does the most amazing, honourable thing and gets down on one knee and proposes to Kush. He is totally stunned by her question, but accepts her proposal and they both hug with pure excitement and happiness! I truly felt that this was a beautiful moment, I know it's not traditional for the lady to pop the question, but it is the 21st century, why shouldn't women propose to their loved ones, I'd love to see it more often!

Of course, Gray has no knowledge about Whitney and Kush's engagement, but the interesting thing is when he returns from the Gala, he removes his wedding ring from his finger! Like, why?! Is he really over Chantelle already?! It's not until the following day when Whitney arrives at his place to take care of the kids that Gray eventually finds out. Whitney begins to explain that she was going to text him when she got home, which kind of puts a small smile on Gray's face, making him think she was going to thank him for a lovely evening or something, but it turns out she was just going to tell him about her and Kush's engagement! As Gray learns the news, you can see he has to put on a front, claiming that he's thrilled for both of them, but deep down - we know he's not as thrilled as he makes out, deep down, he's seething! As everyone gathers at Ruby's club to toast the happy couple, Gray arrives late but once again he can't help but be completely manipulative! As he steps to the bar, Kush approaches him saying that argument from the other day has been forgotten about, but Gray seems to be really sly, claiming that he's luckily to have Whitney - stating that she'd be willing to wait for him to get out of prison and they may be able to walk up the isle in about 4 or 5 years time! Ooooo, he's so conniving isn't he? What do we think will happen for Whitney and Kush, will they be able to get married before he goes to prison? Or is something even more devastating going to happen?!

--

The second thing I have to mention is Sharon! Now she's moved out of the Vic, I have been wondering where she's been staying, it turns out that she has moved in next door to the Slaters! To be fair, I was wondering where she had gone, whether she had moved in with someone, but turns out that she's managed to get herself her own place. Unfortunately having the Slater's as her neighbours is the price she's had to pay! She happens to mention to Callum that she's desperate to have a new start for her son, Albie! Realising that she's had to depend on Phil for a few things in her life, she take the opportunity to approach him about becoming a part of his money laundering business, regardless of giving her son somewhere to live, she needs to have some kind of business opportunity for her son, to provide for him, but also for something for her son to be proud of.

As much as Phil is willing to help his old friend out, Ben can't seem to understand how his Dad is still clinging to straws where Sharon is concerned. I guess I can understand Ben's concern, he clearly doesn't want his Dad to be made a fool of again. He makes the valid point that Sharon would never had ended up in this mess if she hadn't have slept with Keanu in the first place. In an attempt for once and for all keep Sharon away from his Dad, Ben takes it upon himself to confront her, but Sharon - being the vixen that she is, gives just as good as she gets, claiming that no one would even bat an eye-lid at Ben if he didn't share the same surname as his Dad! But interestingly, Ben gives her some food for thought, which leads to Sharon changing her mind about being involved with Phil's business. She approaches and Phil and claims she wants something that Albie can be proud of, she's had to confide in Phil for too long now and she needs to do things her way, for her son - which I think is perfectly reasonable and understandable!

The next day, she's look through the paper for all sorts of business opportunities, but as does so, she happens to over hear Peter and Kheerat talking about fitness! Could this be something that Sharon could look into? As Peter arrives home, looking worse for wear - I genuinely can't tell whether he's been for a run or whether he's been out getting pissed again - however, Sharon approaches him with an idea of getting into fitness. But Peter, being the immature male that his is, scoffs at the idea of Sharon wanting to get involved in fitness. She stands her ground though and claims that she doesn't want him to train her, but somehow grow a business in fitness, to which Peter sarcastically responds by questioning that she's wants to become a Personal Trainer?! Realising she's not getting anywhere with Peter, she seems to visit an old venue of the Square, something which I always thought got turned into "Ruby's". We see Sharon look at her phone and contact Jack, purposing that she has a business opportunity for him, but we can see that she's stood beside a business of building of some kind named "Ronnie!" - was this Ronnie's club or something before she passed away?! I can't remember what this piece was, if anyone can remind me, I'd love to find out! What could Sharon's next business be?!

--

The next thing on my list is the Slater's - mainly Lily for a change this time! Can I just say how brilliant it is to see the young actors and actresses being in the centre of a story for a change? After learning that her Mum is going to be going to prison, Lily can't seem to understand why her Nan isn't doing anything to help. Poor Jean has so much on her plate right now, she's having to deal with her terminal cancer and the fact that her daughter is going to prison. Interestingly, she happens to mention that this day happens to be Stacey's final day of freedom! Does this mean she'll be going to prison or going to trial very soon?!

Meanwhile, in another part of the Square, Billy and Honey are waiting to hear news about Janet's audition, eventually both Lily and Will happen to meet up on the Square, together they share stories about their families being at each other's throats. Lily confiding in Will about her Mum going to prison, the fact she called Ruby her "Wicked Step-Mum" was brilliant! But Will also informs her that his family isn't as different, as he's having to cope with his Mum and Dad bickering over his Mum's new relationship with Jay - it seems these two youngsters have more things in common than I realised. They both have dysfunctional families! To cheer his friend up, Will invites Lily to the celebratory party that's been planned for Janet.

As Lily and Will observe the events and discussions taking place in front of them, Lily questions whether Billy and Jay are rowing or actually being civil with each other, but the next thing that Will says seems to play on Lily's mind. He mentions that since Honey had her fall, both Jay and Billy have been nice to each other, mainly because they've had no choice. As Janet arrives for her surprise party it's revealed that she's been given the job for the ad campaign. As Lily returns home, Will's words play on her mind. She finds herself at the top of the stairs, she can overhear her Mum and Jean discussing what's going to happen over the next few days. Suddenly we hear a horrendous scream, Lily is seen lying almost unconscious at the bottom of the stairs. The poor girl has thrown herself from the stairs in an attempt to stop her family from arguing. Will she be okay?!

--

The final thing I need to mention is Mick and Frankie! After trying to get to know his daughter a lot better, he's come to learn that Frankie hasn't got her driver's licence yet. Determined to teach his daughter to drive, he takes Frankie out in the car, unfortunately things don't go to plan when the car seems to pack in! As much as Frankie tells her Dad not to worry, Mick begins to feel distraught, considering the fact the he hasn't been there for her as a child, he's eager to be there for her now she's come into his life. Eventually they manage to get the car starting again, however they're met with another issue when a car-park attendant places a ticket on the windscreen of the car.

As much as Mick tries to co-operate with the attendant, things only seem to escalate when he's accused of being a repeat offender. Mick admits he's taught his other children to drive in the exact same way, but the car-park attendant seems to really insult him by claiming he's broken the law numerous amounts of times. As Mick appears to lose his patience, he rips the ticket off the windscreen and throw it back at the attendant, poor Frankie is silent as she watches the events happening in front of her, luckily she thinks on her feet, gets into the car, starts the engine and reverses quickly for her Dad to jump in! In Mick's shock at her driving skills, he lunges into the car and they speed off before the car-park attendant can do anything else.

As they get home they determined to try again, but I have to say I love Frankie's humour! Claiming that she'd make a brilliant get away driver, she hilariously puts on a pair of tights over her head to play the role! After another successful driving lesson, it looks as if the car seems to have another issue, as Mick continues to see to the car, his phone begins to ring. Frankie finds it, claiming it's a bloke called "Tom" - however Mick informs her to ignore the call, instantly Frankie is suspicious and begins to question her Dad, however Mick seems to make a comment which doesn't sit well with Frankie, claiming she's "Beginning to sound like her Mother!". Frankie is deeply hurt by this comment and walks away, making Mick realise he's said the completely wrong thing!

In a desperate attempt to make it up to her, he follows and claims that the bloke he ignored the phone call from was someone he was meant to speak to revolving around his sexual abuse as a child. Frankie completely understands and Mick states that because she's his daughter, she will be a Carter! As they return to the Vic, Frankie appears to be confronted by old school bullies who seem to have tracked her down after hearing the news about her Mum. Mick however seems to seething after hearing everything they're saying, but Frankie is proves that she is more than capable of looking out for herself, putting the bullies right in their place, which leaves a huge smile on Mick's face, she truly is his daughter! Only as they try again when she's behind the bar, Mick takes his chance to step in, however when he informs them to stop hassling Frankie her referrers to her as his "Staff" and not his daughter! This clearly upsets Frankie as she comes realise that even though she's longing to become a part of his family and become a real "Carter" - Mick finds it really hard to call her his "Daughter!" - even though he's said it directly to her, he can't seem to admit it to other people!

I really hope that Mick will overcome this fear of admitting who Frankie really is, if he's has any hope of building a relationship with her, that is the first thing he's going to have to do! I know I've said it once and I'm going to say it again, I really can't wait for Nancy to return, I'm really excited to the see the sister dynamic between Nancy and Frankie, it's going to be brilliant! What do you think of the soap so far? If there are thoughts and opinions you'd like to share, please feel free to leave me a comment or message, I'll always take the time to respond! Thank you all for your on-going support! Love you all xXx

[husbandograveyard]

Matchup for the snail anon! 

Hi! Congrats for the 500 followers, if I’m still on time, I’d like to have a One Piece matchup (preferably with a male character). I’m a 19 year old girl around 170 cm tall with medium brown/chestnut hair and blue-grey eyes. I always wear pants because I don’t feel comfortable in skirt or robe. I love reading (mostly manga or fantasy books) and listening to music. Sometimes I play videogames, do a jigsaw puzzle or try to draw or write I’m a very picky eater that doesn’t stand most of the vegetables except in soup or very specific plates. I don’t drink alcohol either. I’m very introvert but I’m not sure if it’s really introversion or just shyness/fear (probably a mix). I don’t go out often (even if I like being with my friends) and I rather be with some friends than at a huge party. I’m often nervous and particularly when it comes to talk to people. I tend to talk to myself when alone or in my thoughts.  If I’m comfortable enough and there’s few people (like if I’m just with my close family or with 2/3 close friends) I can speak more and even sometimes loudly. Physical contact is a little like talking for me in the sense that I need to be comfortable enough to do them (but I like them especially when I’m cold, and I’m often cold). I’m scared of spider, wasp, and height. I don’t do well with kids. I’m a little lost with what I want to do in life and doesn’t have big dreams. I’d like to manage to finish I story (whie being satisfied) or to take time to get better at drawing. I think it’s all, I hope I didn’t forget something and sorry for the rambling in the middle and my English. Thank you for the event and congrats again for the followers again (you deserve them). (Sorry, my ask hasn’t been eaten, I just had to correct/add some stuffs. Snail was just a word in case, to recognize from potential other anon even if it’s weird I admit ^^’)

NGL, I kind of really like Snail as the word, it’s cute and snails are amazing UwU. Thank you for your kind words. I match you with... 

OTP: Coby 

Coby is the ideal partner to get comfortable with. A relationship that starts out as friends, and blossoms into something more. Coby is just extroverted enough to get you out of your shell without making you too uncomfortable, but introverted enough to keep it on the down low and to make you feel happy and calm whenever you’re together! 

Coby prefers just your company and maybe a handful of others over parties as well, and he will not hesitate to just plan a date night instead of the party planned. Perfect excuse for either of you to spend some time together and to not get overwhelmed by the chaos that a party full of young marines can be!

Coby will be there for you your whole journey while you figure out what you want to reach in life, and is there to support you no matter if you can settle on something to do or not! He is also fiercely protective of you, be it pirates or insects you’re trying to get away from, he’s got your back no matter what! 

He likes to takes things slow, hence the friends to couple dynamic, and that works well with how you need time. Whenever you want to take a step back or take it slower, he will not be offended, he will ask you if you’re okay every step of the way. 

He will find some nice hobbies for you to do together, even if it’s just taking a walk to the beach, hand in hand, and finding a nice spot to read a book or just chill together! He will bring a nice picnic full of your favorite foods to enjoy! You may be picky, but rest assured that this boy will make sure there is still plenty for you to snack on without feeling too guilty! 

Runner up: Roronoa Zoro 

Zoro would be a nice match, because he too, prefers a small set of people over the chaos of huge groups. He’s insanely loyal to you, very protective and respects the pace you want to set. Just napping together? You want to talk while he listens? Reading a book while he trains? All fine by him! 

Zoro gets a little flustered from physical contact, so working together to set a pace in your relationship is great. He’s not much of a talker, but a better listener than he seems to be and will let you take the lead to ensure you’re okay. 

Why he’s not the OTP: while Zoro prefers peace and quiet and alone time, he still loves his crew and they are a loud ass bunch of people. This can get overwhelming for you, especially at chaotic moments and parties! Oh, and even though it’s not the biggest deal breaker, but Zoro enjoys sharing a drink with his s/o every once in a while. He doesn’t mind, but having a partner that drinks as well, makes him feel less guilty when he does so. 

BroTP: Vivi Nefertari 

Vivi is extrovert enough to lure you out of your shell, but calm enough to help you be comfortable everywhere. Her commanding presence makes sure everyone leaves you alone when needed, but attracts the right group of people to have fun with! 

Vivi enjoys the same kind of hobbies, has a big collection of books to get to and knows the best spots to sit in peace and draw the sights, animals, people, without getting too bothered! 

She also is the best listener. She gives you amazing advice, both on relationships, life, things to do, and suggestions for goals, even if you don’t necessarily follow up with them. She is insanely loyal and supportive of everything you want to do! 

[urrguide]

FOODIE'S GUIDE TO MARRAKESH

These movement guides are intended for tentative arrangements and current wandering off in fantasy land as it were. Up to that point, remain safe!

M'smen

Sightseers have since a long time ago rushed to Morocco's Red City for a sample of the extraordinary. The very name invokes flavors, snake-charmers, 

and arousing delights. Its food soaks are in Berber and Arabic impacts and eating here can be an incredible experience. Marrakech must one of the most reminiscent, scrumptious, and exceptional goals for foodies in the Mediterranean locale. In any case, Marrakech can be dumbfounding just because of the guest (or any guest). Spare yourself from unremarkable couscous with this manual for finding the best food in Marrakech.

MOROCCAN CUISINE – CAFES – RESTAURANTS – LOCAL DISHES – MARKETS – COOKERY CLASSES – FOOD TOUR – SOUVENIRS – RECIPE BOOKS

MOROCCAN CUISINE 

Marrakech truly was one of the primary general stores and markets in North Africa. Products and flavors were conveyed up the Saharan shipping lanes by camel. The Arab impact brought mezze and organic products from the east. French standard left its imprint as well, as did control of Andalucia. Marrakech has desert, mountains, and ocean inside short proximity. Stews are scented with nectar and saffron, cumin, protected lemon, olives, and dates. Slows down in the medina are heaped high with flavors and mint and figs. Morocco doesn't have a culture of eating out so most of the cafés are focused at guests as opposed to local people; it's very simple to leave away having eaten normal tagines at swelled costs. The best customary Moroccan food is normally found in the home, so in case you're remaining in a riad do benefit as much as possible from any chances to eat or cook with your host. Local people for the most part like to eat universal food when out for the night. The primary dishes related to Morocco are tagine and couscous. You'll never observe these served together, they are discrete dishes—and couscous from a bundle is heresy! Couscous is customarily eaten on a Friday (the blessed day) and is what could be compared to Sunday lunch. It's meticulously hand moved from semolina and steamed with the meat and vegetables. In Marrakech, you'll likewise discover Tangia, a stew cooked in a dirt pot in the ashes underneath the hammam (instead of on a burner in a stoneware tagine).

Moroccan breakfast at Cafe des Epices THE CAFES

Sooner or later during your outing, you'll need a break from the singing warmth and power of the Medina. Here's a determination of probably the best bistros in Marrakech to shield from the sun and get your caffeine fix: Atay Cafe. Close to the Ben Youssef Madrasa, this is the one with the most Instagrammable rooftop patio. Energetic juices and boho-stylish vibes. Bistros des Epices. Perhaps the coolest bistro, head to this staggered Spice Market bistro in case you're longing for a latte or searching for a light lunch, chill beats and housetop sees. Bistro Clock. Initially began in Fes, Cafe Clock presently has a station in Marrakech. It broadly serves a camel burger and offers social workshops and customary jam meetings. Bistro du Livre. One for the bibliophiles (and those lenient toward tobacco smoke), this agreeable hideaway and English-language book shop has a liquor permit and is well known with ex-pats. Grande Cafe de la Poste. For climate, this reestablished pioneer period brasserie is difficult to beat for beverages or eating. It's a debauched neighborhood establishment with nearby fixings and live jazz in the nighttimes.

THE LOCAL DISHES TO TRY 

Just as the numerous minor departure from tagine and couscous, here are a couple of neighborhood specialties and tidbits to watch out for while meandering the Medina:

Amlou. A delightful blend of argan oil, nectar, and almond glue. This is your new most loved plunge.

Babouche. Snails served in a daintily spiced gritty stock, these snails taste more like mushrooms than you may anticipate.

Insane Bread. One of the numerous names for cushy pitta-Esque sandwiches stuffed hard bubbled eggs, pounded potato, and zesty sauce. Likewise, pay special mind to sandwiches highlighting aubergine (eggplant) or sardine.

Becerra. Garlicky fava bean soup.

B'stilla. The exemplary Moroccan dish is generally made with pigeon or chicken meat encased in slender flaky baked good and sweet flavors, yet different fillings, for example, fish are accessible as well.

Briouats. Minimal triangular samosa-like filled baked goods, loaded down with meat or sweet almond glue.

Brochettes. Flame-broiled sticks of meat, one of the most famous road nourishments on Djemma el Fna.

Harira. Generally eaten during Ramadan to break the quick, little dishes of this generous lentil and chickpea soup are probably the least expensive road nourishments you can discover in Marrakech.

Hodangal. There's a bunch of slows down in the Djemma el Fna serving sweet zesty teas with stomach related properties.

Juices and smoothies. These are all over; attempt mixes of banana, date, avocado, almond, orange, and sugar stick juice, orange bloom water, nectar, figs, and rose water.

Kaab Ghazal. The great Moroccan patisserie sweet made of almond glue enclosed by baked good and molded into gazelle horns

Khobz. The staple Moroccan bread; round, level, regularly made with semolina flour and extraordinary for plunging and scooping.

Labia. Moroccan prepared beans! Generally a morning dish. Plunge your khobz.

Ma'qooda. Potato wastes plunged in egg and pan-fried.

Mechoui. Spit-cooked sheep, with the offal, were likewise accessible for the more daring.

Mint tea. It's practically difficult to leave Morocco without having attempted 'Berber Whisky'. Mint leaves fermented with green tea, poured from stature to initiate bubbles, and typically presented with a pile of sugar solid shapes.

M'smen. flatbread-like hotcakes with nectar and smen (aged margarine), flavors, or dunked in amount.

Seven. Moroccan doughnuts.

Tangia. A Marrakech uncommon of sheep and safeguarded lemon moderate cooked for the time being in the heaters that heat the hammams.

THE MARKETS

Zest Market

The business sectors of Marrakech Medina need little presentation and are apparently the city's primary draw.

The acclaimed (and UNESCO-secured) Djemaa el Fna square in its middle is the social heart of the city. The square wakes up around evening time with narrators, artists, snake-charmers, and

food

sellers. My preferred corner is the mint market, administering colossal packs of the stuff for use in mint tea and perfuming the air with its cool scent.

The

food

slows down in the Djemma el Fna don't have gained notoriety for cleanliness, although hand washing stations have as of late been introduced. The auditorium is unrivaled, yet numerous slows down are scams. Better, less expensive

food

is accessible in the littler back streets of the Medina. In any case, it's a rush and a transitional experience for individuals visiting Marrakech, so here are a few hints for eating there:

Search for a horde of local people

If somebody is bothering you to eat there, continue strolling

The better the menu in English, the less to anticipate from the food

Even though slows down showcase costs, concur what you will pay forthright and don't acknowledge any 'complimentary gifts' that will definitely be labeled onto your bill at an extortionate rate

Stick to food that is newly barbecued or seared before you

Watch that the singing oil looks light and clean

Maintain a strategic distance from plates of mixed greens and minced meats

Fish is unsafe except if you know the birthplace/stockpiling

Albeit intangible upon the appearance, the medina is isolated into littler network regions, each with a mosque, hammam, and a nearby market for products of the soil. Pro venders are additionally bunched into souks (markets) all through the medina—the zest showcase is one model (and one of the least demanding to discover).

THE COOKERY CLASSES

Marrakech is truly an outstanding and least expensive goal to take a cookery class. For all intents and purposes, each riad or inn will offer this, either in-house or at a bigger school. Classes do shift as far as what they incorporate; less expensive classes may include helping your culinary specialist with a tagine, while progressively costly classes may incorporate learning various dishes and shopping at the market for fixings.

Some all-around respected classes include:

Amal Women's Training Center

Bistro Clock

Dar Les Cigognes

Faim d'Epices

La Maison Arabe

Souk Cuisine

For

foodies

with a sweet tooth, Amal can likewise sort out a heating class.

Mint tea

THE SOUVENIRS TO BRING HOME Marrakech is shopping nirvana, you won't battle to fill your bag with treats. However, here are a couple of focuses to hold up under as a primary concern while looking for palatable trinkets: Argan oil. Morocco is the principle maker of argan oil, which is utilized in cooking and beauty care products. It's produced using the bits of argan nuts which develop on trees close Essaouira toward the south of Marrakech. Costs are high as the shelling of the nut is finished by hand, frequently by Berber ladies, and it's an undeniably mainstream fixing in beauty care products. On the off chance that the cost appears to be modest, it's likely weakened. Restorative evaluation oil is light and mellow, culinary oil will in general be darker as the nuts have been toasted before separating the oil. Search for oil put away in dim glass bundling. It has a medium smoke point however is predominantly utilized for dressings and plunging. There are various co-agents in Morocco that you can visit to purchase from the source. Flavors. The most mainstream flavor blend in Marrakech is ras el hanout. Signifying 'head of the shop', each store has its own adaptation of the blend which can contain over 20 distinct flavors. You can likewise get blends to use for reproducing your most loved tagine at home, just as shop for singular flavors, for example, cumin and cinnamon. In any case, while those engaging hills of flavors make for extraordinary photographs, flavors debase in contact with air so search for shops that store flavors in containers. Watch out for counterfeit saffron as well; this costly zest is frequently traded out for texture strands colored orange. Tagine. You'll see a lot of embellished earthenware production available to be purchased in the souks, however, these painted and coated marvels are frequently unsatisfactory for cooking because of the nearness

[boogiewrites]

Reports & Repertoire 15

Characters: Eddie Brock x Venom x Candace Miller (OFC)

Word Count:  4700+

Summary:  Eddie and Candy both start to deal with the reality and the downsides to their success and the symbiote. Candy battles herself on feeling like she’s out of touch and not helping enough. She has to share some bad news with Eddie, but she follows it up with good news.

Warnings/Tags: Fluff. Minimal angst. Everyday life for these two. Language. Mentions of violence.

Click on my icon then go to Mobile Masterlist in my bio for my other works and chapters. (Had to do this since Tumblr killed links, sorry.)

Having finished a two-part episode for her show, Candy found herself with the rare few days off. Since she'd been so engrossed in her current project, new stories had been slipping her grasp as she'd been ignoring the acts of violence and focusing on her investigations for the shady business practices of the newly rich tech guys. The only thing more problematic than their umbrella companies was the even shadier nightlife patterns in the neighborhoods where the poor mixed with new gentrification.

 She was currently trying to catch up on messages and emails from her sources and friends in the mission and tenderloin, trying to see what areas looked like they could use some help.

She spent her night reading and researching, not a terrible use of her time as it was one of her favorite past times, but she would've rather been spending this night off with Eddie. He was currently finishing up a job and would be flying out on a red-eye back home. So she was spending her evening getting together all the violent crimes stats she could to pass them on to him.

They'd formed a relationship much like his and Venom's, where it was mutually beneficial and based on a strong foundation of killing people that deserved it. She gathered the information, as she was known to be excellent at and passed it on to Eddie. Sending him patterned locations of the worst sort of violent crimes. She focused mainly on ones that were committed against women and children on her own personal bias but she couldn't find it in herself to care.

As was their schedule, Candy would normally be wrapping up with her crew and having a drink at some bar near where they were shooting and Eddie would be out with the information she gave him and hunting. She could tell it made Eddie feel better about what he was doing, grateful for her help as he was good at intimidation and being a bit of a cowboy when it came to his work, but she was more precise and worked faster within legal means. Since his time was spent traveling and being slower at the writing bit, she took it upon herself to do the bad guy round up and let he and Venom handle the things that the law wouldn't. Eddie felt he had a purpose, even found himself thinking of himself as some sort of vigilante justice character head, a man for the people again. He'd wanted to be some sort of superhero growing up, do some sort of good in the world, and he was surprised and found contentment that he could help, actually make a difference as he saw it. He could interview all the serial killers or heartless CEO's he wanted but nothing felt as proactive as eating a pedophile whole.

So on this Friday night, Candy sits at home alone, watching true crime documentaries and folding laundry. Not exciting but a necessary action she'd been neglecting. Eddie is encapsulated inside his symbiote as he rips and tears through a gang in an abandoned warehouse. Eating his fill, swallowing men whole and leaving nothing to be found. They both go to bed alone, but share a goodnight text before falling asleep, both exhausted but fulfilled.

That next morning Candy decides it's been too long since she'd been to the shelter and volunteered. She gets up early and dressing down, being used to overthinking her outfits since being more in the public eye. She didn't want to be all over social media in people's selfies looking like she wasn't doing as well as she was. But it felt good to get back into her old trainers, holey jeans and an old habitat for humanity t-shirt that was faded from time and washings.

She's greeted more enthusiastically than usual. Some of the younger volunteers asking for pictures with her, but she was volunteering and it didn't matter what she looked like. To be honest, the skin care routine the makeup artist with the studio had suggested along with sending her for facials had left her feeling more confident without makeup than she ever had. It was comforting and problematic in its own ways, knowing that having money and access to these sorts of things was what made so-called celebrities look so good. But as she learned, rubbing elbows with people from all walks, everyone had their own ugliness deep down that no amount of gold fleck, young blood, or endangered snail facials could erase.

The people at the shelter treated her the same and it's what she wanted.  A little break to be treated like just another face and be around humans who didn't deny their struggles but rather wanted to share. She'd take this over a gala any day. She gladly took the shit talking from her old friends, jokingly asking for an autograph and she got to roll her eyes and laugh about the insanity of her importance.

As she settles into a far table, shifts changing and people moving in and out, she stays back, observing and having a soda. She sees an almost unrecognizable version of a woman who had given her information shuffle in. The woman sees Candy and begins to hobble towards her on sight.

"Who did it?" Candy says rising immediately and taking her by the hand, sitting her down before joining her on a couch.

The woman smiles, patting Candy's cheek. "I'm glad you're back." she says with a sigh.

Candy learns in her absence that violence has been rising again. The cops being mad and not patrolling as often due to her expose', unreported crime had been on the rise.  The usual drugs and fighting were always there, but groups of people not from the area were starting to come in looking for trouble. Candy takes out her notebook and gets all the information she can. Descriptions, locations, dates, times, and injuries for her notes. It felt good to be back in her place of origin and getting to be around people she knew. She'd been so invested in going higher up, taking down bigger people, interviewing strangers for their silhouetted, voice distorted words. Getting to help someone with no other motive than helping, no cameras, no paycheck involved felt right and she felt grounded. Candy told her friend she would do what she could, try to pass the information on to someone who could help. She just couldn't disclose that the person who could help would be eating the abusers.

She takes a shower, scrubbing away the dirt of helping clean the shelter, thinking about how she felt responsible for the uptick in problems. She wanted to do something to correct it. Something besides point Venom in the direction and have him attack. SHE wanted to do something. As she's brainstorming, hair piled on top of her head messily, chewing on the end of a pen, Eddie's voice startles her out of her train of thought.

"Thought we were keepin' work out of our days off?" he scolds playfully, hanging up his coat as she moves and closes her laptop that was sitting in her lap on the couch.

"I went to the shelter this morning to do some work." she takes a big stretch, lifting her arms over her head and groaning. "I've been distracted by it all afternoon." she yawns.

"You interested in some other kinds of distractions?" Eddie smiles and moves in to kiss her.

"Maybe." she chuckles against his lips.

"Maybe?" his voice goes high pitched and cracks. "Ya gonna have to do better than that Candy." he teases, face moving to her neck.

She laughs and hums happily as he moves her back to the couch as he snuggles down between her legs, nuzzling into her neck and giving her pecks to her face and chest. "Of course I am. But have you eaten yet?"

"What are you my mother?" he laughs, raising up to look down at her.

"Has he eaten today Venom?" you ask with a scolding tone.

"We have not." he says, a little blob of a head appearing over Eddie's shoulder.

"How do you think you're gonna fuck me well enough for me to keep you around if you aren't fueled up?" she laughs, kissing his cheek and wiggling out from under him and into the floor as he watches with his mouth open with fake disbelief.

"You hearin' this?" he asks Venom, flopping to his side and watching her. "The way she talks to us?" he says, watching her move to the kitchen.

"She has a point, Eddie." Venom says, looking at him, knowing she wasn't serious, but also seeing the facts in what she was saying.

"I can't win with both of you on the same side." he groans, getting up from the couch.

"Get in here and eat baby boy." she chirps and moves to take the leftovers out of the fridge.

"We not goin' out?" he asks, ruffling his hair with his hand.

"We are, but I have to get ready and you're going to get cranky if we go out on an empty stomach."

"This is true." Venom says. "You get very grumpy and I have to work harder to keep you stable. Eat."

"Geez you two. Fine." he says taking the cold container of pasta and shoving a fork full into his mouth.

"Good boys." she says kissing his sauce-stained cheek. "There are pills in the cabinet for you Venom. I'm gonna go get ready." she calls out.

"Yesssss." she hears him hiss, already stretching across the room as she walks towards her bedroom.

---------- Candy looks lovely, a dress and curled hair with boots as she and Eddie walk side by side down the street after a movie. They're on their way to dinner, wanting something quick to eat while they get a bigger order to go and then go home and be able to snuggle up. Being in public together was something that they both wanted but neither liked doing. They couldn't be affectionate as they didn't want anyone to know they were a couple and Candy was starting to get quite annoyed by it. When she'd heard "Oh my God are you two together? You're so cute!" after taking pictures with people who recognized them for the 8th time that night, she let out a frustrated sigh.

"What's wrong babe?" Eddie asks quietly, handing her her helmet.

"I'm just..." she rolls her eyes and sighs. "Just not in a great mood." she mumbles, taking her place behind him on the bike. "Let's just go home baby. I don't want to have to stop myself from holding your hand anymore. I'm tired." she wraps her arms around him, and feels Venom lace between her fingers. "Yeah, I 'm tired of hiding too." she sighs against Eddie's back.

Eddie can tell she's distracted and frustrated when she keeps chewing on her bottom lip while they watch a movie.

"You can just tell me what's wrong ya know?" he says out of nowhere and her eyes blink fast, coming back online.

"Just having a weird day." she sighs, nuzzling her face into his chest.

"That could mean a lotta things." he states with a sweet tone.

"I'm trying not to think about work. But I found out crime has spiked in the tenderloin because the cops are being pissy and not patrolling as much, possibly because of me and the expose' we did. Then some of the women I know have been assaulted and no ones helping. I got that info and I'm gonna pass it on to you so you guys can handle it. But I'm just frustrated because I want to help. Not hand everything off to you two."

"You are helpin'." Eddie states obviously.

"How? You two are going out and doing everything." she says with an attitude and Eddie knows she's only mad at herself.

"You're giving us the information. I couldn't know all this stuff if it wasn't for you. And I'd rather be out there than you. I worry about you when you're out there doin' filed work ya know."

"I know. But that's where I want to be. I miss doing things without cameras. Getting my hands dirty. I just want to feel like I'm anonymous and can get in there and work on the ground floor again. I've been in so many skyrise apartments and fucking overdone offices lately to interview assholes I'm afraid I'm going to lose touch."

"Oh now that's not true." Eddie says, rubbing her arm. "You're only one woman babe. You can't do everything. You know how many people you've helped since doin' the show? More than you ever coulda reached before."

"Yeah." she grumbles. "Doesn't mean I don't miss it though."

'She could come with us.' Venom says in Eddie's head.

"Absolutely not." Eddie answers out loud.

"Huh?" Candy looks up at him.

"Talkin' to Venom." he mutters.

"What's he saying?" she asks curiously.

"No, don't-" Eddie begins before being interrupted.

"You should come with us. We can protect you."

"Really?" her eyes flash brightly.

"No, no. I don't want her involved in this." Eddie says.

"Look at her. She wants to. She is unhappy." Venom coos.

"You can't just go givin' her what she wants just cause she's unhappy. She'll be a lot more unhappy and so will we if she's dead."

"That's what I do to you." she pouts. "And couldn't you guys protect me?" she says with a higher pitched voice.

"We could. We do not have to do anything dangerous." he says aloud. 'Take her out with us, we do not have to hunt. Let her feel useful. It is important to her.' he says to Eddie in his head.

"Yeah, we can just check out some places or something. Or you could be my bodyguard's, I could be bait."

"No bait." they both answer and she sighs.

"Fine." she frowns.

"You should think of other ways to be helpful though. Comin' with us isn't something you should get used to. It makes me nervous." Eddie shakes hs head, his brow low.

"But is that a yes?" she smiles.

"Okay. We'll take you out. But we aren't going to go looking for trouble, alright?" he says with raised brows, trying to show her he was serious.

"Deal." she says with a smile, snuggling back into him.

'Awwww. See? Look how happy she is.' Venom says quietly in Eddie's head, reaching a tendril out to lovingly pet on Candy's hip. She takes it and holds it as it forms into a hand.

Eddie nods and sighs, giving her a kiss on the head, thinking about how he really didn't want her to get hurt because of him.

------ "Any other ideas in miscellaneous?" Candy's producer asks the room full of the Report's crew.

"Have you seen this crazy shit?" one of her interns says, tossing a printed out photo across the table to her. "Somebody got a picture of this crazy looking thing. It's blurry as shit and dark but it's been exposed and brighten. What the hell is that thing?" he says with a look of amusement.

Candy takes the picture and tries to not show her fear. Someone had gotten a picture of Venom, crawling up the side of building. It was dark and blurry, but she knew her alien boyfriend when she saw him. "What's uh... what is this?"

"The cryptozoology boards are lit the fuck up over it. Calling some San Francisco crawler. The OP said they saw it lurking around rooftops and they got this shot. Apparently, the thing is fuckin' HUGE and fast."

"You sure it's not just photoshopped?" she says convincingly enough.

"It's damn good photoshop if it is." he shrugs.

"Where'd you find this?" she asks, putting the paper back down on the table.

"On the San Francisco boards. Some monster hunters were flipping their shit over it. Trying to come up with theories about it. Saw it down in the mission apparently. Tying it in with the spike in missing persons from there possibly. "

"Yeah most of those people are a bit... imaginative." she says with heavy condescending in her voice.

"I thought it's something you might be able to have fun with. No one's really talking about it yet. Thought you might want in on the ground floor." he shrugs, putting the picture back in his folder.

"I do news. People, places, events. I don't do cryptozoology crap like that. What am I going to do go stand in a dark alley and wait?" she says sarcastically and a murmur of chuckles and agreement come from the others. "That sort've thing is below us. Cool to talk about on some monster board but I don't want to cover things that are possibly fake and only speculation. Thanks for thinking outside the box though." she shrugs and tries to pull back not make the kid feel bad. It wasn't his fault her boyfriend's powers had been possibly exposed.

"And any other new ideas?" her producers asks again, she'd been waiting to share something when there was a lull in the talking.

"Yeah." Candy nods, tapping her pen on her notepad, trying to shed the worry and focus. "I thought maybe we should try to connect with the city more. Give back, give some good PR for us and the network. I think this show would be a great place to do something like that."

"What do you mean?" she's asked.

"Do spotlights on places that help people out. Show us donating money and time and we can give out information on their causes and tell people how to donate to them. It'll be a story by focusing on a particular struggle on the ground level, the people that don't normally get any credit. It'll be easy, fast and cheap to shoot. The money saved can go towards a donation."

"That's... a great PR idea." she responds, scribbling down on her notepad. "I think this would be a good way to balance out the budget. Get more social media involvement, show that we are a part of the community like you said." she nods in thought.

"It would also give us more downtime to work on bigger things and not give us 7 day work weeks." Candy offers.

"Also that. A day or two of shooting, a press release, quick press conference. Some talking heads and narration." she nods. "Would be a hell of a lot easier on logistics."

"My thoughts exactly." she smiles proudly.

"Alright. Well, I have another meeting coming up, so anything else?"

"Yeah one more thing but, I'd like to speak to you privately if that's okay."

A murmur of yes's from the crew around her who are already packing up their things.

"Fine with me." she says, putting away her things, Candy moves to sit on the table top next to her.

"Is it bad news?" she asks first.

"No." she laughs and shakes her head. "But I needed you to run something by the higher-ups or, HR or whoever needs to be told about this." she shrugs.

"Oh God did someone harass you? Shit."

"No! No." she moves her hands back and forth with another friendly smile. "I've just been seeing someone and I'd like to be able to go public with it."

"Oh!" she says with a big nod and the clear sign of relief in her shoulders. "Who's the lucky guy?" she asks with a much more perky disposition.

"Eddie Brock." she says with a nervous chuckle.

"Ahhhh." She nods. "I see why you're asking now. Wasn't in your contract to have to ask these sorts of things."

"Yeah, I know. People see us out and we have to be careful not to get too close and everything. And we're pretty serious, so I'd like to be able to go out on a date with my boyfriend ya know? But since we're both employees and this used to be his show..." she frowns.

"No, I get it. I do. It was smart of you to have me check first. I appreciate it."

"So just...text me or email me when you know something? I'd love to be able to have a real date night and not pretend like we're just friends when people ask us for selfies and tell us how cute we are together." she smiles and walks towards the door.

"If I have time I'll swing by and ask today. I don't think they'll have a problem with it, since you two have your own successful things going on now but I'll let you know when I know, kay?"

"Thank you. I mean it." she says sincerely with a wave goodbye.

----------

It's date night and Candy has both good and bad news on her mind. She's sitting across from Eddie who is eating cheese fries and rather messily. She sighs for what could've been the hundredth time that night.

'Ask her what is wrong?' Venom suggests

"Mmmph?" Eddie makes a sound, but Candy just thinks he's enthusiastic about his fries as she chomps away at her fried pickles. Something Eddie made fun of her for, telling her he didn't know he was dating a hillbilly. She took it in stride and told him to shut his city ass up.

'Something is wrong. Stop stuffing your face with this artery-clogging food and pay attention.' he snaps at him.

Eddie wipes the cheese from his face, taking a moment to look her over, her eyes were far away but her mouth was set in a pleasant smile. "Somethin' wrong?" he asks, pushing the fries away.

"Maybe."

"Well can you maybe tell us?" he says playfully.

"There are pictures of you." her lips move to a straight line and she meets his eyes. She hadn't wanted to ruin the night with this but she obviously wasn't hiding anything from them.

"Pictures?" he says with the push back of his chin, his eyebrows lowering in question.

"Of Venom." she says quietly.

Eddie's eyes go wide. "What?"

"In the meeting this week for brainstorming one of the interns found a, albeit really poor quality, photo of you crawling up the side of a building in the mission. " she says with no inflection, clearly she'd been dreading sharing this news.

"Oh." he says with wide eyes that darted around the table.

"Yeah. You're gonna have to figure something out. Maybe lay low for a bit. The crypto people have ahold of it and have already linking it to disappearances in the area."

"Whatta ya mean linked?"

"With their theories."

"So nothing concrete?" the relief in his voice is obvious.

"It's a blurry picture of a humanoid creature...so it's all theories." she shakes her head. "No one in the meeting seemed to take it seriously and I shot it down as internet fodder that wasn't worthy of our time. BUT the missing people have been noticed. Which means you need to switch up your locations or try to make it on chocolate and pills for a bit until the interest passes."

"He's not happy about that." Eddie frowns.

"About which part?"

"The chocolate and pills part."

"Of course." she rolls her eyes. "He should be more concerned about being seen and found out. That's a whole world of trouble that none of us want. We have a nice little set up between the three of us. We don't need outside involvement to come for our careers or our personal lives." she whispers, her face more sad than annoyed now.

"She's got a point, man. You need to keep your priorities in line here. We've done it before we can do it again." he shakes his head.

"I'll even order more pills. Get some chocolate wholesale or something. I won't let you waste away. You know that." she reaches out and takes his hand in hers and the affectionate touch in public surprises them both. She'd been scolding them so long for trying to touch her when they were out that this was a more meaningful touch than what it would seem on the surface.

"We're a team alright? I'll do everything I can to keep the noise down from my end. I'll keep you both running as best as I can. And you can lay low for me okay? We'll just spend Friday nights together when we can instead of you out hunting."

"That's something we can both agree one." he smiles and rubs his thumb across the back of her hand. "More time together would be nice." his soft smiles warms her, makes her feel like everything will be okay.

"It would." she squeezes his hand and looks down at it. "And I've got some other news. Some good news." she says with a tilt of her head. "I'd just been so worried about ruining the night with mentioning the pictures that it just..." she motions to her head. "Took over my brain. So... sorry. Ive not meant to be distant."

"S'okay." he squeezes her hand back, surprised she's still holding it. "You got good news though? Let's focus on the good news." he suggests.

"We can do that." she nods and gives him a warm smile back that makes Venom purr. "You done with those fries babe?" she laughs. "I'll tell you the good news on the way." she offers with a hum of happiness.

"Yeah, wait." he says, taking his finger and getting the rest of the cheese after stuffing the remaining fries in his mouth. "Ready." he mumbles out with stuffed cheeks and she cant help but laugh at him.

"C'mon you slopapotamus." she snorts.

She holds his hand on the way to the movie theatre as they walk together. He doesn't dare mention it because it's making them both giddy with pride. They were getting to show she was theirs and that was extremely important to Venom and Eddie just wanted to be able to show her he liked her through touch. They get to the line and she's recognized.

"Oh my god can I get a selfie?" the girl says excitedly.

"Of course." Candy says, leaning in and smiling.

"Holy shit you're Eddie Brock, right?" the girl asks. Looking up at him.

"That'd be me." he says with a charming smile.

"Can I get a picture with you too?" she asks with wide eyed.

"Yeah." he says politely.

"Oh my god wait. Are you two like on a date or something I totally just interrupted. Shit, I'm sorry." she says her face flushing with embarrassment.

"Yeah we were but it's fine." Candy laughs, moving and putting her arm around Eddie's back and he tries to hide how much Venom is freaking out in his head and how equally shocked he was on the inside. "Have a good night." she says sweetly, moving up in the line.

"What?" Eddie's eyes dart around. "What was that?" his voice breaks.

"The good news." she says, moving to put her arms around him under his jacket.

"Oh?" his high pitched voice of shock makes her sigh at his bewildered, adorable face.

"I asked if we could go public about our relationship." she says quietly, her chin tilting up towards him.

"And they said yes?" he says with excited eyes.

"They did." she purrs back.

"Oh shit." he lets out a giggle, wrapping his arms around her. "They did?"

"Uh huh." she nods. "So are you gonna give your girlfriend a kiss or what Eddie?" she teases.

"Of fuckin' course I am." he mutters, already leaning against her lips.

"You think we can even get a bit saucy and holds hands during the movie? Might even let you put your arm around me." she winks and laughs.

"If you don't mind my butter fingers from the popcorn." he laughs.

"You know I never mind your fingers when they're slippery Eddie." she coos and gives him a suggestive look as she pulls away, tugging at his hand.

"Oh!" he giggles again and follows behind her like a happy puppy to the ticket stand.

@hardygal69 @marvelgirl7 @emerald-bijou @negansdirtygirl22 @brianaisasongbird @vale0413 @izzy-the-ginger @chortletortoise @onomatopoetic-aesthetic @anrm1 @jademox @nightcraver @venomous-possibiities @tinastarkandco @chipster-21 @ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes @queenof-wakanda

[evilsnowswan]

11, 12, 14, 19, 20 SO MANYYY 😂❤️

I love it! Thank you! :D

11. Who is a mentor to you?

I don’t know. It’s pretty much always been just me figuring out stuff as I go. No role models or mentors. The only person who comes to mind that maybe fits the bill a little, is a professor who deeply impressed me and who kindled my love for forensic linguistics. She made you feel seen and respected as a person (not just some student ID) in classroom of 400+ people and that’ll never fail to impress me. She was a force to be reckoned with and I just hope that I might one day become as fierce and unapologetic in fighting for what I believe in and what I stand for.

12. Would you ever want to be famous? If so, what for?

Absolutely not. I am a very private person. Being a celebrity would be my worst nightmare. Part of me would want to be a famous writer - simply because that means I could afford having writing be my day job and only source of income, but I’m not good at what’s necessary to get there. I hate crowds and cameras and I don’t network well. 

14. Do you consider yourself a romantic?

Uhhh, maybe. Life kind of beat the romantic right out of me. I’m pretty cynical for a romantic, but I would love to have faith in love and romance (again). That would be nice. So yeah, I guess, maybe I am.

19. What is the strangest thing you have eaten?

Oh boy, have you come to the right house. xDD I will try *anything* if it sounds wild enough. I’ve tried snails and frog and crocodile, for example. Oh, and snake. And a couple bugs. Most of it tasted really… boring. 

Oh! I just remembered… when we were kids, we used to try all the horse treats (you know the ones that are hard as rocks) before giving them to our horses to see if they were “any good” :DDD (Spoiler alert: No, they were not.)

20. What can you see outside your bedroom window?

Unfortunately it’s been a construction site for months and they won’t finish for over a year. It’s driving me insane. They are making a racket 6 days a week 7am to 7pm. I can’t wait for that to be over.

Deep Asks Meme

[bananashemmo]

When We Collide (Part 22)

Pairing: Assistant!Y/N/CEO!Luke

Rating: NC-17

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21

Summary: He is the definition of high class smart ass, swimming in Dom Pierre Pérignon champagne and has never seen the shadow of poverty. She is underprivileged, lives in a messy dorm room on sale and struggles working as an assistant after being thrown out of college. But how will they collide when Luke makes Y/N pregnant after a drunkenly one night stand?

”You’re still here? I thought you were supposed to be off at 5?” The confusion was clear on Nicole’s face when you glanced over your shoulder to see her stand in the door frame to your office. 

“I was supposed to.” You mumbled and wanted to roll your eyes. The work in front of you was insane, the pile was only growing bigger and you couldn’t see the finish line.

“But with Luke’s busy schedule and lack of planning he forgot to mention that I had to make 200 invitations for an event he has coming up soon. This means I will be staying here until the early hours of morning before I manage to finish any of this.” 

Nicole’s eyes widened by your explanation. 200 invitations sounded large and with the mess on the top of your desk she assumed you hadn’t gotten that far yet. 

She was wearing her uniform but you knew that she was ready to head home. It was pretty lucky if you thought about it, sometimes you just wished you could serve for people instead of being under someone’s request all the time.

The pile only grew bigger and you didn’t understand how or why. You had the envelopes, you had the small stickers that were formed like diamonds to close the invitation you had been printing out constantly.

It was like there was no end for this. You continued and you continued, but at least you didn’t have to lick the envelopes. If Luke had required for you to do so you would have complained about a sore tongue. 

“Isn’t there a thing saying when you’re off work you shouldn’t be required to do more? I think I’ve read that somewhere? “She asked with a sympathetic look. She looked like she really wanted to help but truly wanted to go home. 

“There might be but I’m not sure. It’s kind of hard trying to argument with Luke at work, it’s basically a non-existing possibility.” You shrugged and folded another envelope.

You had kind of wished you kept more track of the numbers. At first you had started out fast but the more bored you became the slower you got. You just wanted this to be over with. 

“And you have to be done tonight? Can’t you just do it tomorrow morning?” Nicole asked with furrowed eyebrows trying to find a loop hole. It was impossible.

“No because I need to send these out at exactly 8 o’clock tomorrow morning. Luke prefers to have his mail sent as fast as possible and because this is urgent it needs to be done by me.” 

“You know he should hire someone else to do the dirty work. You don’t deserve that kind of trash.” She placed a hand on your shoulder and made you look up at her with a very faint smile.

“It’s a part of my job. Normally I like it but it’s this kind of shit I don’t prefer to do. I don’t understand why he didn’t hire someone else to do it.” You mumbled with wide eyes, looking down at the not so hard but tiring work. 

“Maybe he just likes to see you suffer.” Nicole giggled quietly and took a step back.

She had her embrace filled with books you could tell that she had to hurry home and study. Sometimes the work hours here didn’t fit properly for her college classes but she seemed to manage.

“I’ll see you another time okay? We need to go out and have a drink soon.” She suggested and you quivered an eyebrow.

���Nonalcoholic.” She added with a wink, knowing that you could easily misunderstand her.

“Sounds fair.” You smiled with a sigh and leaned back in your chair. If you just closed your eyes for a second you would wish to fly away and take a trip to Hawaii. All-inclusive and paid without any worries. 

“I’ll let you two work alone.” Nicole nodded and leaned over to grab the door handle. 

“Two?” You quivered an eyebrow again by her words and rolled your chair to face her better.

“Yeah you know,” She nodded her head down to your lower parts, “You and the little baby Hemmo there.”

You sat confused for a bit until you looked down at your bump. Sometimes you forgot, not that you were pregnant but the fact that a living life was growing inside of you. A human, that less than a few months suddenly would be in your arms. 

“Oh yeah...” You mumbled a bit off but smiled regardless, “Thank you. I’ll see you at some point.” 

She giggled by your reaction and headed out of the door. Silence fell upon the room besides the constant noises from cars driving many floors down. The traffic was jammed at this time of the day.

You looked tiredly over your desk and reconsidered everything. Did you really want to spend the rest of your evening in the small squared room with lack of entertainment and with only one focus to get everything done.

It wasn’t fair at all. Luke had been planning this service event for ages and in the last minute he wanted you to finish off his works. Of course you had decided to take the day off last week but the least he could do was to give out the work in pieces.

It would have been much easier to work on it, 50 envelopes per day until they had to be sent out. But no, you had to struggle here at the last minute.

Your glass of water was half empty but you didn’t want to sip on it. The water had become normal temperature and the same had the frozen grapes you had been nippling on for the past hour.

You weren’t sure if you wanted to stand up and just stretch your legs. It had come to the point where you could barely feel your bum and it had been planted in the same position on your chair for hours.

Sometimes it was tiring working like this. You had a lot of energy normally despite the pregnancy and being forced in a chair wasn’t really your thing unless it was something important and exciting.

Opening and responding to mails weren’t really your kind of thing and to be honest you never really knew how to answer them properly. Were you being too formal or was your tone to loose to send to someone important in the name of Luke?

You could already feel that you would have to stay here until the early mornings. You might as well hurry down to the studios and find some stage makeup because it wouldn’t be possible that you could head back home and get dressed before you had to go back to work.

It was different being in the building with the lack of workers and colleagues. 

You could walk down the hallways without stumbling upon someone else, you didn’t hear the normal voices of people typing on their computers and papers constantly being spit out from the copy machines.

Even the restaurant was closed, the lights had been shut off and the lead chief had left. He was normally standing in the kitchen and preparing for tomorrow morning.

You tiredly yawned and leaned over to grab your glass of water. If you had to sit here for so long you could do the small effort to stand up from your chair and head over to the water machine to fill up something new. 

The bobbles were loud and almost echoing in the small office. You had considered turning on the music but you had never actually been allowed to do that besides the typical radio playing over the speakers. 

But since you were the only one here you decided to do so. What was the worst thing that could happen? The security guards from 13 floors beneath would come and complain about loud noises?

You opened the Spotify on your computer which you had been downloading behind Luke’s back and waited until you were ready to pick out a song. You didn’t care and didn’t have a preference so you just started the global top 50 and shuffled play. 

It was nice with background noises. You didn’t feel that alone and felt that now you could continue to do your work without trying not to yawn every two minutes. 

But the work still seemed to progress like a snail. You didn’t get faster only more distracted. If it wasn’t the computer you were staring at it would be the phone or the many magazines resting at the end of your desk.

Not that they were something you had invested, no it was Luke’s favorite ones. Or more likely, the ones where he was featuring on the front page with some sort of model commercial. 

You hadn’t paid any attention to the time but when you suddenly realized it was midnight, you felt more defeated than ever.

You had probably gotten through a hundred but it didn’t make any sense why it took this long. You had been required to make it as perfect as possible because the papers weren’t allowed to have any weird shapes or scratches but this was getting ridiculous.

Twice you had to stand up and print out new ones because you had ruined them in any sort of way. First, you had placed your elbow on one of the papers and it had received a small little bump. The second time you knocked down your water and ruined a few envelopes in process.

Safe to say, this wasn’t your evening after all.

All you wished was to head home and just to go bed. You weren’t allowed to drink coffee and neither energy drinks so all you had left was your half eaten grapes and water. Not something to boost your energy. 

You had considered sleeping over your desk just for a short moment but you knew how that would go.

Every time someone would plan to nap for just 15 minutes it would turn into hours. You were too afraid to do so because you knew that you would wake up hours later with a confused expression on your face and with the same amount of unfinished envelopes.

Maybe you should hire someone yourself. Call a friend and claim that it was an emergency because if you had to stay here longer doing the same thing you would freak out completely.

And with the constant drinking of water you had to pee as well. It was the only time you stood up, to go to the bathroom or to fill up your glass because it was a constant habit of drinking to do something else. 

Standing up from your chair to fill the glass again you stopped in track almost in shock when you saw Luke quietly stand in the door frame to your office.

“Hi.” You managed to say, your voice rough from not speaking for hours.

“Hi.” He replied back in a gentle tone and furrowed his eyebrows when he saw the work over your shoulder.

“You’re well aware that it’s midnight right? You’re still not done?” He asked but not in an angry tone. He sounded a bit curious but also confused because he had expected you to be home earlier on. 

“Yeah I know...” You trailed off and looked over your shoulder as well, “I’m sorry I know you wanted me to be as fast as possible but this is taking ages and I can’t seem to get it done in time! It’s not fair Luke that you assigned me to do this the last minute!”

“I know.” He replied with a nod and you furrowed your eyebrows.

“Which is the reason why I showed up to help.”

You stood still trying to register what he had to say. Normally he was never the one to help, he loved watching people do his job for him it was kind of the CEO thing. To just stand and watch everything else to what he earned. 

“Okay.” You nodded your head with furrowed eyebrows and less confused than before, “Because I don’t deserve to do this alone. Help is required! Yes, it really is!” 

You fumbled over the words but deep inside you were happy to see him. Could you believe that? You were actually happy to see Luke show up to do something for you which was kind of in the end something for him but still. 

Efforts for trying hard and doing something for the good. 

“How far are you?” He asked even more confused than before when he walked closer to your desk. It didn’t have head or tail, he couldn’t figure out just by one glance. It was a huge mess.

“I think between 70 and 100 but I’m not sure. It all kind of became a mess during the process and now I’ve lost track of everything.” You replied after filling your glass with water and offered him as well.

He shook his head politely and took a seat down on the extra chair you had. He was trying to figure out what was going on but even his organized mind seemed to totally explode. 

“You really need to take some organization classes because I can’t have an assistant like this.” He admitted honestly but with a hint of tease in his tone.

“Well I don’t think you can find a messier assistant than me. Take it or leave it.” You smiled back and fell down on the chair. You could almost see your ass print on it, that was how long you had been sitting on it. 

He rolled his eyes by your words but laughed regardless. He was trying to separate the diamond stickers from the envelopes so it wouldn’t become a mess. Everything was piled but it was all over the floor. 

“You didn’t consider making three different piles instead of having one large without being able to find anything?” He asked curiously and quivered an eyebrow. 

“No I’d rather have it all like a mess.” You responded back sarcastically and leaned your elbows on the top of the table. 

“I did have it as three piles but when I saw the time and started to stress it became one big pile of mess. I don’t understand it wasn’t supposed to be like this but it did!”

You were totally frustrated but he took it with a smile. It was almost as if he was amused with your struggles but there wasn’t anything to laugh about because he had to do the work himself now. 

“What’s with these diamonds anyways?” You asked confused and pulled up yet another sticker to close the envelope.

“I have a huge obsession with diamonds.” He admitted honestly and made a small pop with his tongue.

“An obsession?” You asked and raised your eyebrows. You had heard about many obsessions but this one was out of the ordinary.

“Yeah you know, when you’ve got a lot of money you decide to invest on different things. I have around 30 savings in my bank but now I decided to use some on these diamonds I’ve bought. Sounds pretty cool huh?” 

He seemed pretty impressed by himself but you weren’t that much of the same. What was the big deal with diamonds anyways? You would never actually afford or see one.

“Very impressing.” You sarcastically commented and nodded your head in agreement with wide eyes.

“I knew you’d like it.” He hummed and continued to fold the papers, “I’ve ordered a few diamonds that will be placed in a glass box at our apartment. It will be looking super fancy I’ve already decided which room they will have.”

“You’re dedicating a whole room to diamonds?” You asked almost in disbelief but it didn’t come as a big shock when it was Luke.

“Yea?” He asked like it wasn’t obvious, “I see my diamonds as my kids. They need a bedroom, they need care and someone to look over them all the time. I have them to just have them but I’ve also made sure to have the best security system to watch over them.”

“That’s insane.” You admitted honestly and shook your head in disbelief, “You would use that much on diamonds and stuff? How about buying a fake one like a beauty blender or something?” 

“Beauty blender? No no that’s not the same at all.” He shook his head disagreeing but that you imagined he even knew what a beauty blender was. 

“I’ve used a lot of effort to get these diamonds, they’ve been transported all around the world before they finally arrived in our kitchen. You probably saw the large box on the kitchen counter. I know you’re a little bit nosey.” 

You looked down at the work with wide eyes. You weren’t supposed to be that nosey but you had in fact checked it out. He must have noticed but it was also weird considering it was standing in the middle of the kitchen.

“So we’re having a party Holly and I. It will be gemstone themed so everyone has to pick out something and wear it. Of course it has to be the real one because everything fake should be left out.”

You nodded your head by his explanation but inside you were totally confused. Why would someone have a party like this but then again, you thought a night of beers would be fun so this would probably be the most amusing thing for their lifestyle. 

“Well I hope all these invitations will be worth it for your diamond party.” You replied occupied with your work and glanced over at him shortly. 

“They will.” He hummed back with the same warm smile and continued to work in silence.

He hadn’t even complained about the music but you could see he was bumping his head to the beat. You were actually a bit surprised because you only expected he heard classic music with lots of piano and such. 

He looked like he was enjoying what he was doing. His lips were parted in concentration but he had that calm expression on his face. He was wearing his dress shirt as normal but his blazer had been swung loosely over the back of his chair. 

The stress had left your body completely. You didn’t feel like you wouldn’t make it in time and even if he was just as slow as you the progress was faster when you combined your help together. 

He could possibly tell that this work would be insane to do alone. He had probably been walking home wondering why you hadn’t come back from work yet to realize what kind of assignment he had ordered you to do.

It was those kinds of moments where he didn’t think straight. He was sometimes sending out orders that didn’t make sense because he was so stressed out about his own work he needed someone else to full fill it instead. 

“Am I invited?” You asked casually, not that you expected him to say yes. You just wanted to tease him a little bit just to see his reaction.

“You really want to come?” He asked almost in disbelief and looked at you with curious eyes. 

“No but it was nice you know having the thought of someone else.” You giggled and shrugged your shoulder.

“If you want to come I can just invite you.” He leaned over to grab a marker and a paper to write a new invitation but you stopped him.

“No it’s fine.” You giggled and placed a hand on top of his, “I don’t think I would fit in besides I’ve got something else to do on this day.”

“You don’t even know what day it is, do you?” He asked with a growing smile and you fell back to your chair. 

“No... But that doesn’t matter. I’m probably doing some very important stuff.” You nodded your head in agreement to prove your point and attitude. 

“On next Friday?” He crossed his arms and waited for your smile to fade because he knew just exactly well you weren’t doing anything. You barely had plans. It was all about work or being home.

“Yes I’ve got a very important deal!” You admitted and baffled your arms in the air, “With my TV!”

There was only a small it of hope that believed you actually had some sort of planning but just like he predicted you didn’t. Living with each other made you grow closer without knowing and realizing.

“I think that is a fair reason to come.” He winked and played along. If you weren’t comfortable with showing up there was no reason for it in the first place.

You smiled softly by his words and continued to do your work. You were actually in disbelief because you were closer to the finish line than ever, you only needed to finish 30 or so.

Time flied fast with him. He was there to entertain if he had something funny to say or if he wanted to explain something funny that had happened at work today. You might not have the same humor but you started to understand his more and more. 

“How do you feel about you know... Living with me?” 

The question wasn’t something you had expected and you stopped in track from folding an invitation.

“I know it’s a weird question it’s just... I’ve never actually lived with a girl before. Of course my mom doesn’t count and all that but throughout my life I’ve always been this independent person so living with someone else has left me wondering if I’m even able to contain for more than just a day at work...”

He was looking down at his papers while speaking as he was a bit nervous to look up. You were pretty surprised by his explanation he could tell you’d been having some preconceptions about him. 

“You’re fine to live with.” You admitted because it was in fact true.

“You’re not annoying, you have people to clean up after you so I don’t worry about that an overall you’re nice. There’s no complains here I couldn’t be more grateful about deciding to letting me stay. It’s lovely.”

A small smile formed on his face by your words almost if as he was in relief. He nodded his head letting the words sink in and looked up. 

“Besides the fact that you snore.” You reminded more quietly just to tease him and his jaw fell.

“I don’t snore!” He disagreed and crossed his arms.

“Yes you do,” You argued and laughed, “How would you even know you can’t hear yourself when you’re asleep!”

“Well fine but at least I don’t talk in my sleep!” He argued back and you lifted your eyebrows.

“I do not talk in my sleep okay! That’s a thing I’m sure of I’ve never heard something like that before.” You shook your head disagreeing but he nodded. 

“Yes you do! I heard you talk like crazy here the other day when I walked past your bedroom. It was late past midnight so I assumed you were asleep because whoever would you have a full on conversation with?”

“Oh my god that’s the baby I’m speaking to.” You laughed and baffled your arms in the air like it was obvious.

He stopped in track by your words and his eyebrows lifted again. He didn’t expect that to be the answer so he looked down at his work just for a short moment.

“You talk to the belly?” He asked as if he hadn’t heard correct. 

“Yes. I speak to the baby. Not in my sleep.” You explained and rolled your chair back to show the belly. It easily hid under the table with how low your chair was but it was obvious once you rolled back.

“I read in a magazine that your baby’s hearing is developing all the time. Hearing my voice all the time will automatically make us more attached when it’s born. At first I felt a bit self-conscious but now I do it all the time. He or she is after all a real person inside of my womb.” 

He looked down at your bump as you spoke but it didn’t seem like he was listening at all. His head was nodding but his eyes were too focused to let his face react. 

“So that means if I do too, it will recognize my voice once it’s out?” He seemed pretty interested but not very convinced.

You nodded your head in agreement and what you did not expect was for him to stand up from his chair and kneel in front of you. It was the first time he had been this close to the bump since it had started growing.

“I-, I don’t really know what to say?” He looked up at bit confused for help and you shrugged your shoulder.

“What do you say?”

“It depends on my mood.” You admitted, “I talk about everything around me. How my day has been, what I’ve been up to or what I’m thinking right at the exact moment. It comes to me naturally.” 

Your words didn’t seem to help as he still looked clueless and it made you sigh softly. 

“Just tell what’s on your heart.” You leaned down to look at him better, feeling his warm hands caress the skin around your navel. 

“Take me by the word.” He said and leaned his mouth down to your belly. 

“I’m gonna promise you all the Hemm. savings once you’re out and ready to calculate your first financial number.” 

His voice got quieter as he spoke but the seriousness was there and it was the reason why you couldn’t stop laughing.

“Really?” You asked, your voice almost raising and octave, “Out of all the things you could possibly say?”

“What it’s true.” He stated with the exact same voice and looked up at you with wide eyes.

You rolled your eyes by his words but couldn’t stop laughing. It was too good to be true and it was so like him it shouldn’t even come as a surprise. 

“I will buy a personal car for the baby before it’s 10 so they can change it out if they don’t like it when they’re 16.” He mumbled more quietly and stood up from kneeling down, “That’s what my parents did.”

“And you think we’re gonna be just exactly like them?” You asked and watched him smile softly. 

“I think we’re gonna be even better.” He replied and took a seat down in front of you, taking an envelope in his hand and continued the work. 

You smiled by his words but didn’t respond, deciding to let the silence take over. It was enough of cuteness of today and if you ever wanted to go home you needed to finish this.

“Besides my interest in cars have grown and I definitely don’t feel like buying a Bugatti Veyron it’s definitely gonna be a waste of money.” He mumbled quietly and continued his work and letting you roll your eyes just for one last time this evening. 

[serpenscapes]

Reasons to love One Piece (and why you should consider giving it a chance):

-        Ridiculously large and colourful cast of characters (currently at 866 named characters) each of whom have incredibly unique designs and stories

-        There is a reason for everything – a character who is a gold-digger has a reason for it, a character with a pinwheel in his hat has a reason for it, a CHARACTER WHO LITERALLY DRESSES LIKE A BABY ALSO HAS A REASON.

-        Oda (the mangaka) has included his own interpretations of many mythical creatures (giants, mermaids, dwarves, Amazons) in the series as well as inventing many of his own species and tribes, so the breadth of races and species in One Piece is boundless.

-        Insanely well-done foreshadowing. Things that happen 200 chapters ago come back and slap you in the face, or you’ll rewatch it and go “OH MY GOD THAT’S WHAT HE MEANT?” Something that happens in the FIRST EPISODE you don’t realise the true meaning or power of until approximately four hundred episodes later, and then you rewatch episode one and your whole world implodes from sheer BRILLIANCE.

-        The moral of the entire series is to follow your ambitions and pursue them no matter the cost, even if it means sailing a whole fucking ocean, and it’s beautifully portrayed and remarkably moving.

-        THE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT - a character who insists he will kill someone if they get in the way of his ambition is later willing to sacrifice himself and his own goals for that same person. A woman is certain that she is a burden to her friends and says they should leave her to die, but later when potentially under threat she says she doesn’t mind, as she knows her friends will protect her.

-        Male-female relationships aren’t fraught with sexuality or romance as they often are in other series—they’re FRIENDS. JUST FRIENDS. There’s a lot of skinship and hugging and spending time together and it’s all perfectly acceptable, with none of the unnecessary *doki doki* or blushing.

-        Oda invents a lot of unique technologies within the universe e.g. instead of regular telephones there are “transponder snails”, as well as cyborgs powered by cola, cards which can track the movement and location of a specific person, coatings that allow a ship to travel underwater and many other things.

-        You will ENVY the amount of confidence and conviction the main characters have – not only in themselves, but in one another.

-        Speaking of envy, the friendship and bonds between the main characters will make you cry your heart out. The genuine and unwavering loyalty they have to one another is unlike anything I have ever seen in any other series, EVER.

-        No, really, there’s a scene where the main characters DECLARE WAR ON THE WORLD GOVERNMENT in order to get back one of their friends. THEY LITERALLY SET A FLAG ON FIRE AND DECLARE WAR ON THE WHOLE WORLD JUST TO GET THEIR FRIEND BACK.

-        Multiple strong, well-developed female characters who suffer incredible hardships and have backstories that do not revolve around males or romantic relationships

-        Passes the Bechdel test

-        No unnecessary romance, and any romance that is present is used entirely for comic effect

-        Emphasis is placed on bonds between family/friends/platonic love

-        Due to the foreshadowing and the great number of iconic scenes as well as the hilarity of some parts, the series has great rewatchability value.

-        DEVIL FRUITS – Magical fruits that give you special powers if you eat them at the cost of you not being able to swim. The powers vary from things as badass as being able to turn into fire or cause earthquakes to shit as dumb as turning into a giraffe or making clothes appear on people.

-        Best-selling manga in history, 4th best-selling of any comic globally ever (behind only Superman, Batman and The Beano).

-        The protagonist (Luffy) is straightforward and driven and doesn’t carry around the heavy emotional burdens and questioning narratives that so many other shounen protagonists do—he does whatever he wants and doesn’t care what others will think of him for it. Luffy is incredibly cheerful, happy-go-lucky and charismatic and this is noted by one of the other characters – he has the ability to make anyone around him into his ally. Despite coming off as an idiot (which he often is) he’s also incredibly intuitive and intelligent in combat and all of this together makes him by far one of the most uniquely appealing protagonists in any shounen manga. It is impossible to dislike him.

-        Clever portrayal of characters—Oda intentionally uses very little kanji when writing Luffy’s dialogue in order to portray how simplistic he is. Similarly, he gives Luffy almost no thought-bubbles because Luffy just says everything he thinks.

-        Luffy has the power of the gomu-gomu fruit which means his whole body is rubber and it works very well because: a) His power isn’t ridiculously strong b) He can get very creative with it which leads to a lot of very fun fight scenes and great chances to take advantage of perspective shots, as well as mess around with proportions and this overall adds a lot to the style of the series

-        Every single character is a certified BADASS. Even the characters who you don’t want to like.

-        Variety of well-written and incredibly unique antagonists, each with their own motivations, powers and backgrounds.

-        When a reader asked Oda if there would be any romance for or between the crew members in One Piece he responded that ‘their only love is adventure’ and I find that completely adorable (and also thank God no romance.)

-        It’s really quite difficult to HATE any of the characters. There are over 800 characters and I can only say I genuinely HATE two of them. Many characters are difficult to hate once you learn their backstories and motivations, or simply because as characters they’re so compelling and charismatic.

-        Ever-expanding and HUGELY creative universe: there’s an island in the sky, an island in the prehistoric ages, an island made of candy, an island on the back of a giant elephant, an island on the ocean floor and many more. The scale is quite literally insane when you realise that Oda has invented an entire WORLD from scratch and is making the characters traverse the whole thing.

-        Raises immensely important questions regarding morality, good and evil, politics and the governmental system, monarchy, revolution and rebellion, class, gender, race, corruption etc.

-        The government and marines in One Piece present themselves as a force of justice, but then there are marines known for being corrupt, but then there also some marines who are good?!?!? MORAL DILEMMA?!?!

-        The pirates in the world of One Piece are viewed by the government as scumbags, but then some pirates are good?!?! But then some pirates are complete assholes?!?!?! FURTHER MORAL DILEMMA?!?!?

-        You want to hate a character for doing something but then are they just doing their job?!?! But is their job motivated by the right things?!?! But are they allowed to question this?!?! SO MANY MORAL DILEMMAS?!?!

-        Seriously all the moral ambiguity adds so much to the depth of One Piece.

-        Even Luffy specifically says he is not a hero, doesn’t want to be a hero, and while he admires heroes he himself is not a hero because he’s too selfish.

-        CONSPIRACY THEORIES - The government have destroyed all knowledge of a century in history which is referred to as “The Void Century” and part of the intrigue of One Piece is to find out WHAT HAPPENED AND WHY DID THE GOVERNMENT WANT TO DESTROY ALL TRACES AND WHAT ARE THEY HIDING?!?!

-        There are so many crossing over storylines which then come back later i.e. a character from early in the series is waiting for a group of people, approximately 300 episodes later we MEET WHO THEY ARE WAITING FOR.

-        Cartoonish art style allows for HUGELY expressive characters, dynamic action scenes and a massive variety of (often insane) character designs.

-        It’s hilarious – the guy who is (arguably) the most badass in the series has such a shit sense of direction he gets lost on a straight path. There’s a reindeer on the crew who gets referred to by another member as “emergency food supply.” Another crew member constantly assumes that the other members have died or been eaten. One guy constantly gets “I-can’t-go-on-this-island” disease. When Luffy meets a new species the first thing he asks is “Do you poop?”

-        It will make you cry over: a whale, a ship, a hat, a dog, a bento. No, seriously.

-        You will cry over a lot of other things too

-        (If you watch the anime) it has the most breath-taking soundtrack and the seiyuu all do an incredible job of voicing their characters. All of the opening songs are also TRULY karaoke-worthy.

-        (If you read the manga) Oda uses the chapter covers to tell side-stories about other minor characters or villains, as well as taking drawing requests from readers. The double-page colourspreads and the volume covers are also gorgeous. His Q&As at the end of each chapter are also hilarious because he is a sarcastic fuck.

-        Oda confirmed in said Q&A that Luffy’s dick stretches. Later in the story there’s a scene where a group of women who’ve never seen a man before are pulling at Luffy’s dick (while he’s unconscious) thinking it’s a mushroom that’s grown on him and saying “why is this stretching.” I’m not kidding. I’M NOT EVEN KIDDING.

-        Despite the individual “arcs” and their unique storylines there is a single overarching goal throughout the series—to find One Piece, a narrative that has lasted over 20 years and is still going strong. Said single narrative allows for an attachment to the series because you REALLY want to see the end goal when they finally reach it; a lot of other series lack this level of scope.

-        Each of the main characters have their own ambitions and goals and are driven to achieve these throughout the series, often by a heart-wrenching and tear-inducing backstory (all of which are depicted extremely well.)

-        The arcs vary so wildly in their storylines and settings that the intrigue and fun never stops; you’re guaranteed to find one you like – examples: there’s an arc where they have to stop a civil war, an arc based on overthrowing a fake God, a prison-break arc, multiple arcs where they aim to rescue a friend/family member, a huge war and an actual HALLOWEEN ARC WITH ZOMBIES AND SHADOW MONSTERS AND A HAUNTED HOUSE (so good.)

-        There are SO MANY QUESTIONS AND SO MANY THINGS WE STILL NEED TO KNOW and the fact that Oda has run the series for 20 years and still managed to keep up such a high level of intrigue and creativity is genuinely amazing

-        There’s an undead skeleton with an afro who wears a top-hat, plays the violin (+ other instruments) and has a cane-sword, was also temporarily a rock star and makes terrible skeleton-based puns/jokes. There’s also a tiny reindeer who can transform because he ate the human-human devil fruit. Also he’s a doctor and gets embarrassed and swears at people when they complement him. Both of these characters are amazing and have back stories that will make you cry your eyes out. And they’re just TWO of the characters.

-        The series is my go-to when I need cheering up because the characters are so well-developed that they are easy to sympathise with/develop an attachment towards, the adventures they go on are a good mixture of fun, painful/well-constructed, the determination they have to achieve their goals is incredibly motivational and above all, the dedication the characters have to each other is heartbreakingly genuine.

-        In conclusion: One Piece is completely stunning

[eighthcircuit]

Los Angeles + Beyond I

I moved to L.A. in 2014, after college, and before that, I lived in Santa Barbara, California for the first 17 years of my life, just a little south of L.A. Growing up in sunny Santa Barbara, I always had the impression that big, smoggy L.A. sucked. I’ve done a 180 since then, and fully love the City of Angels… so much so I’ll write a sentence as corny as that.

L.A. is one of the best food cities in the world and I’ll fight anyone who disagrees. Here’s a rundown of some of the most interesting and/or unique food I’ve had in L.A. to date, as well as a cameo from a truly unique dish outside L.A., just cuz!

Guelaguetza

Guelaguetza is a sprawling and crowded Oaxacan restaurant in the heart of Koreatown. While it’s no secret L.A. kills it when it comes to Mexican food, Guelaguetza manages to stand out with a menu wholly dedicated to regional Oaxacan dishes.

It’s commonly said by locals, or at least plenty of locals that I know, that the burrito was invented in America. I just did a Google search that seemed to have debunked this story as false, though it’s still true that California is the home of the larger style of burrito most of us know and love. Fact though their inauthenticity may not be, partially due to this false belief, tacos are seen by many as the Mexican dish, if you’re trying to eat something less on the “American” side of the Mexican-American spectrum.

All of this to say that tacos are like, 1% of the menu at Guelaguetza, meaning it’s a lot that even some Angelenos who think themselves big fans of Mexican food may not be acquainted with. I just checked the menu online, and they have one taco option, though it sounds primarily like a vehicle for their stewed barbacoa goat meat. Instead, you’ll find plenty of variations of tlayudas (which are sort of pizza-like) and lots of mole dishes, among other Oaxacan specialties.

This includes chapulines—grasshoppers. When I visited Guelaguetza, I knew I’d be ordering these ahead of time. Bugs, however, scare the hell out of me. They would be a bit of a challenge, I had thought, and I ordered them as an appetizer to share with a friend, who was less scared than I was out of the gate.

What I did not expect was for the chapulines to be the star of the show! While I couldn’t tell you what entree I ended up ordering, I can tell you just how flavorful those grasshoppers were. I’m sure that had more to do with how they were spiced than some sort of delicious bug flavor everyone’s missing out on, but I’d still recommend these to anyone visiting the restaurant, adventurous eater or not.

Chinchikurin

On the subject of pizza-like dishes, there’s a restaurant on Sawtelle Blvd. in West L.A. called Chinchikurin that specializes in okonomiyaki, which has earned a nickname from some as “Japanese pizza,” though its similarities with pizza may be outweighed by their differences.

Okonomiyaki, in broad terms, is a savory cabbage-based batter cooked with various vegetables, meat, and whatever else might go good in a carb-based dish, so basically anything. Osaka-style okonomiyaki, which is the kind found most commonly in Japan, is made by mixing all of the ingredients in with the batter. Chinchikurin, however, specializes in Hiroshima-style Okonomiyaki, which is made instead by layering each ingredient more loosely on top of one another.

I will admit that the time I took this photo is the only time I’ve ever had okonomiyaki. But it was good! Quite honestly, it was the best okonomiyaki I’ve ever had. If you happen to want to try this regional, less commonly-found-in-America dish in L.A., here’s your place!

As you can see, I also ordered some sort of wasabi beer that I truly could not say anything about other than that it really, truly was wasabi-flavored.

Uncle Tony’s Pizzeria

Check the Yelp page for Uncle Tony’s Pizzeria in North Hollywood, and by all accounts, it probably looks like any other typical pizza place in the U.S. Spend some time giving their menua close read, however, and you’ll find a section for different kinds of Ajarski.

As you can tell from the photo, its presence on a pizza place’s menu isn’t unwarranted, continuing my unintentionally developing theme of pizza-adjacent dishes. This time we’re talking Georgian Pizza, generally called Khachapuri; specifically a variant of from the Adjara region of Georgia, known for its boat-like shape, containing all of the toppings within it, as opposed to a more traditionally pizza-shaped variant found in other regions of Georgia.

I’m absolutely unqualified and uninformed as to why this dish is on this specific menu, though I believe it’s popular street food in Armenia, and may be available at other Armenian-owned pizza places in L.A.

As you can also see in my photo, I enjoyed my Ajarski Khachapuri in the comfort of my own home. Delivery FTW.

Ox Penis Pho (not in L.A.)

Whenever I’m asked the craziest food I’ve ever eaten (it’s happened at least… twice) I have an answer readily available: ox penis.

This was at a restaurant in San Jose, chosen on a whim after a quick Yelp search for pho places in the area. As I tend to do when I know unusual foods have entered the picture, I became pretty excited when I realized ox penis was on the menu (called, funnily enough, “ox pizzle” in the description of the dish).

Though the pho was great, the ox penis was far from the star of the show. It was chewy and relatively flavorless, similar to cartilage. I’m not well-versed in texture-based cuisines, though, and I could very well see its unique texture being appealing. I could also equally see that not being the case, and men simply wanting to eat ox dick because it would make them manly ox men.

This was long enough ago that I couldn’t confidently tell you the name of the restaurant, though a quick Google search seems to suggest it was called Bun Bo Hue An Nam. I won’t say that in complete confidence, but if you’re in San Jose, you can indeed go there and get your pizzle fix.

Mitsuwa

Fans of Japanese food in L.A. should know about Mitsuwa Marketplace, a chain of Japanese grocery stores with a location in Mar Vista, in a building that includes not just the groery store, but a bookstore, an excellent food court and more.

Of note on from the particular visit pictured is that sweet, sweet chunk of wasabi route. Did you know? Most wasabi served in Japanese restaurants in America is dyed horseradish. Sometimes, you’ll see “real wasabi” sold at larger grocery stores, however a close read will reveal it to be 49% horseradish, 51% wasabi. It’s something I’ve seen, at least!

Mitsuwa, however, has the real thing. I can’t say it’s worth trying for being that much better than the non-real thing, but if you have the curiosity of a cat like I do, knowing how to satisfy that curiosity is worth the weight of that wasabi root in gold.

Next to that is a package of marinated whelk snake. I have since had one or two whelk snail dishes I enjoyed (because of course I have), but this particular preparation I did not like.

And that samurai mug? Very much an impulse buy.

IT’SUGAR/Black Tap

For a couple years I used to work as an event reporter in Santa Monica, and occasionally that meant getting to do some cool, weird and/or unique things!

This absolute monstrosity of a milkshake was created by Black Tap, a burger place in New York City known for just that—insane and unreasonable milkshakes.

They partnered with the Santa Monica 3rd Street Promenade location of IT’SUGAR, a sweets shop chain, to give Californians a chance to try one of Black Tap’s signature milkshakes, essentially engineered to appear in as many Instagram photos as humanly possible. There was even a Disney star on deck to hand out milkshakes, because this is L.A.

[fanofiction]

Collection: A Word of Appreciation for Short Fanfiction

The trouble started in an innocuous manner, with Ford suddenly interrupting an important debate on the exact length of the barmaid's legs with queries as to why it was called a "stag" night.

"Is it because the bride and her gang hunt you down tomorrow and tear your living flesh from your bones in Dionysiac ecstasy?" Ford asked happily.

"Er," the groom said, clearly thinking of his blushing bride who, while it was generally agreed was a lovely girl, was not exactly possessed of the sort of physique that allows one to chase deer across mountainsides.

For anyone who has ever read the increasingly inaccurately named trilogy of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, it should come as no surprise that its fandom is just as, if not more, insane. And these fanfictions do their inspirer proud will all manner of madness.

Where else could we get those free morsels of a feast we thought had ended eight years ago? Short fanfictions are a fresh whiff of magic, a reminder of fish, flying, polo, and references that make no sense to anyone who hasn't read the series. They add, but just into canon, with little to no tweaking of established events, pleasing both the Watsonians and Doylists, those who take canon as it is and those who take it as an art to be expanded upon. It is not the first time the community has suffered a withdrawal like this. Seventeen years elapsed between the fifth and sixth books. In that regard, the sixth book could be considered a resurrection of the poor creature that made the feast. Which would make the fanfiction a sort of storified zombie? Ah, well. Fear not, it carries no dangerous epidemics, and is only as contagious as laughter usually is.

Oddly enough, when I construct these bizarre death-related metaphors, I'm not far from the truth; the last book was published eight years after the death of its author, taken from us by what some would call high treason of the Corporal Form, blessed be its arteries, but what most would call a heart attack. Because of this, the series had to be completed by another writer. So I'd say the fandom is continuing the tradition quite faithfully, in the way that all fandoms must and do quite happily. Memorializing, repeating, and continuing is our purpose.

Being fanfiction, there is a small amount of shipping, localized to the first fanfiction I've recommended. Being short, there is room for few themes, and angst does not happen to particularly be one of them. Being Hitchhiker's Guide, these fanfictions are as bizarrely fluffy as a freshly washed dog, even though you're sure its fur wasn't that long before you took it to the groomers... can they extend fur there? They all happen to involve drinking... which is in line with canon, also, where a night undrunken is a night spent and a night drunken is a night unspent, most likely because you can't really remember how you spent it.

But what of that poor creature, eaten so ravenously so many times? We certainly couldn't put anything through that hiatus without its consent. Which is why it was eventually decided to cut through the whole tangled problem and breed an animal that actually wanted to be eaten and was capable of saying so clearly and distinctly. And here it is.

Fluff: +++++

Angst: ++

Smut: ++

Overall Rating: +++++

Better Than Tea by afrai: http://thewritegirls.populli.net/afrai/tea.html

The Running of the Deer by Daegaer: http://archiveofourown.org/works/408721

Childhood Dreams by Daegaer: http://archiveofourown.org/works/67354

I don't have much more to say about this collection, only that these are my favorites of the many hundreds I have read in my tenure, remarkably well-written, the kind that leave you laughing over bricks late in the night. We all need this kind of humor in our lives. I wish I had an internal narration like this.

The Heart of Gold cruised through the infinite stretches of space exactly like an enormous, dazzlingly beautiful, ridiculously improbable starship cruising through the infinite stretches of space. It will come as no surprise to anyone who has a better grasp of the Galaxy's latest technological innovations than the famously bewildered brainless snail of Erqfuaad that the reason for this remarkable resemblance was because the Heart of Gold was, in fact, an enormous, dazzlingly beautiful, ridiculously improbable starship cruising through the infinite stretches of space.

It would make that lowly, leery, oddly loud thing called life much more exciting.

Follow for more of ... this. Comment for more of that. Find out more about fanofiction here.