#before she was ali hazelwood (and i did read it before she was ali hazelwood as well)

[mermaidsirennikita]

I'm actually really into that (in books not in real life 😭) so yeah I know what I'm reading first!

Lol yaaaaay it's a classic for a reason!

I also love somnophilia in romance novels, and I wish there was more of it in actual books versus erotica shorts, but when I bring that up suddenly I'm the weird on in the reading group lmao.

(Never mind that Devil in Winter has light somnophilia, everyone has fun when Evie wakes up to Sebastian St. Vincent going to town on her and talking about how she's hard to wake up, but God forbid--)

[hintsofhoney]

Mine

Paring(s): Alpha!Dean Winchester x F!Omega!Reader

Summary: When Dean is forced to mark Y/N in order to not blow their cover on a case, it leads him to reveal a secret that he's been keeping since they met.

Square(s) Filled: biting for @anyfandomkinkbingo

Tags: 18+, true mates, smut, p in v, marking, a/b/o if that wasn't already obvious lmao, knotting

Word Count: 3.7k

A/N: Helloooo, it's been a minute. If I'm being honest, I have about 10-15 finished works just sitting in my "ready to post" folder, but posting is always such an ordeal, so they just stay there until I feel like dealing with Tumblr. But, this one I did write over the last two days after I finished reading Bride by Ali Hazelwood, which I loved so much that it made me want to dip my toes into the Omegaverse! That being said, I don't know how much in here is actually in line with A/B/O "rules", but I know I needed to twist some things to fit the story (e.g. in this specific A/B/O fic/universe, claiming marks will fade if they're not true mates). Huge thank you to my A/B/O girlies, @makeadealwithdean and @emoryhemsworth, for reading it over, I love you both to the moon and back! I hope you all enjoy!

You can also read me on Ao3!

DEAN WINCHESTER MASTERLIST |  SUPERNATURAL MASTERLIST |  MAIN MASTERLIST

“We get in, find the knife, get out, got it?” Dean asks, looking between Sam in the front seat and Y/N in the back, making sure everyone is on the same page. They both nod once in understanding, before the three of them make their way out of the car, their doors slamming shut simultaneously. 

Y/N stares up at the mansion before them, the music loud, the party raging. It’s some charity event thrown by the wealthiest Alpha in the state, and he just happens to have the weapon they need to finish out this hunt. Y/N stumbles a bit, tripping over the cobblestone driveway in her heels, and she catches the sleeve of Dean’s suit to steady herself. He shoots her a glare that tells her to pull it together. They need to blend in.

“Sorry,” she whispers.

“Here,” Dean replies, grabbing her wrist and pulling it through the crook formed by his bent elbow, forcing them to walk arm-in-arm.

“I don’t need –”

“You are an Omega, Y/N. And there are upwards of a hundred Alphas here who can all smell it. So what you need to do is start acting like one. Just because I’m not some asshole Alpha who demands your respect doesn’t mean they aren’t, and we can’t risk drawing attention to ourselves.”

Y/N takes a deep breath and plasters on a fake smile as they move slowly up the driveway. “Anyone who demands my respect just because of some bullshit biological hierarchy doesn’t deserve it,” she grits out.

Dean stops, turning to face her, one of his hands on either side of her biceps. “Do you want to be on this case or not?” 

His voice is lower than usual, demanding and gruff. A voice he only uses when he wants to remind her that he is an Alpha, and bullshit biological hierarchy aside, her body is wired to listen to him. 

She gulps, and he tries not to focus on the bob in her throat, the pulse in her neck near her gland, the scent of her. The moment he met her he knew who she was, what they were. Are. He’s been taking scent blockers since before he met her, finding it far easier to interact with other Alphas when investigating cases if they couldn’t scent him out, but the moment he met her, he knew he had to start taking rut blockers too. Though, it feels like the longer he’s around her, the more immune he becomes to the pills. Like she’s going to send him into a rut any fucking second, and she has no idea. He’s thought about telling her so many times, but mates come with strings. Strings that aren’t conducive to the life of a hunter.

“Yes,” she answers his question meekly, almost submissively, and he nods to cover the hormones he forces himself to swallow down. Rejecting your biology is not easy, no matter how many pills you take.

“Then I’m going to need you to take my arm, put on a smile, and act like being an Omega is the greatest joy of your life. That means –”

“I know how to be a good little Omega, Dean,” she interrupts, dragging the words ‘good little Omega’ through a sarcastic tone.

He tenses slightly at her words, sarcastic or not. Good little Omega.

“I’m only bad for you,” she continues with a cheeky wink, and fuck, he might explode. Hell, he might take her into the bushes right now and mark her, claim her, before parading her around in front of this entire fucking party with his teeth marks on her neck. He’s rigid, trying to keep himself under control, and she gives him a playful pat on his shoulder. “Lighten up, Alpha,” she teases. “I’ll be a good girl.”

Jesus fucking Christ. He gives her biceps a squeeze that he hopes comes off as reassuring as he’s trying to make it seem, before linking his arm with hers once more and catching up to Sam at the front of the driveway.

The trio is greeted by the owner of the mansion himself, one Jim Myers, who welcomes them in with a smile on his face and a cigar in his hand. 

“How Gatsby-esque,” Y/N mutters under her breath, watching as Myers shakes Sam’s hand.

Dean nods in agreement. “You definitely wore the right outfit.”

Y/N blushes as she looks down at her dress; a black, semi body-hugging cocktail dress bedazzled with gold sequins in some sort of art deco pattern. All she’s missing is a cigarette holder and a feather in her hair. 

“Only because I read the invitation. Unlike some of us,” she mumbles in reply.

“Watch it, Omega,” Dean grits out, plastering on a smile as soon as Myers comes over to greet him.

“Jim Myers, pleasure,” he says, shaking Dean’s hand.

“Dean. And this is Y/N.”

She keeps the cordial smile on her face as Jim takes her hand and brings it to his lips, kissing it gently before inhaling her scent. 

“Pleasure, Miss Y/N,” he says with a feral grin, his eyes darkening with unmistakable lust as he lets her hand fall back to her side. 

Dean takes a step forward, unable to stop himself. “Mine,” he practically growls, and Jim takes a step back, throwing his hands up in surrender. 

“My apologies. I didn’t see a mark, so I just assumed.”

Dean falters, clearing his throat, suddenly reminded of the reason they’re all here in the first place. “No, that’s alright. It’s my fault for not putting it in a visible place.” His eyes dart over to Y/N’s. “I think I’m gonna fix that.”

She ducks her head but can’t hide the red flush that creeps up into her cheeks, reminding herself that it’s just her biology, and that this is all for show anyway. They’re here to do a job, and sometimes those jobs involve… well, whatever the hell just happened. And clearly, Dean is a better actor than she gives him credit for.

Jim chuckles, clasping his hands together. “Well, you three have fun, the drinks are free, the food is good, and if you,” he points at Sam, “good sir, are in search of an Omega, there are plenty to choose from.”

Sam blushes. “Right.” He nods. “Thanks.”

And with that, Jim disappears into the crowd.

“I’ll keep an eye on him,” Sam says. “You two go. Upstairs, down the hall, third door on the right. If I got the right blueprints.”

“If you got the right blueprints?” Dean asks.

“Just go.” He taps his ear to indicate that he’ll drop in on Dean’s earpiece if anything goes wrong. 

Dean sighs, taking Y/N by the hand and leading her up the stairs. He weaves in and out of the crowd, the scents of everyone mixing together, making it impossible to decipher who is what. Y/N’s never been more glad to be on heat suppressors; knowing full well the scents of this many Alphas invading her nostrils would send her body into a major one.

Dean quickly finds the door, and they slip into the room unnoticed, closing the barrier and switching on the light. It’s a bedroom — the master, from the looks of it — and the knife is right in front of them in the middle of the room, across from the foot of the bed. It’s in a glass case, on display, and likely armed with a million alarms, but right in front of them nonetheless. 

“Son of a bitch,” Dean mutters, running a hand through his hair as he thinks about what the next move should be.

“We could find something that weighs the same? Lift the glass and replace it super fast?” Y/N offers.

“Unfortunately, I think it’s the glass that’s probably set to trip an alarm. But the fact that you’re applying Indiana Jones to real life scenarios is making me want to —” 

He stops himself, realizing what he was about to say. He needs to get himself under control but Y/N in that dress with her smart fucking mouth, with other Alphas eyeing her, he really shouldn’t be here, with her, alone, and —

“Making you want to what?” she asks.

Shit. “Making me want to… make you watch more of them,” he replies, opting to circle the display case, searching it for a way in to distract himself from her. 

“Oh, goody. Can’t wait.” She’s as monotone and sarcastic as ever, and every time something smart comes out of her mouth he has to resist the urge to bend her over and fuck her right then.

“Get out of there now,” Sam’s voice comes in on Dean’s earpiece. “Lost track of him for a few seconds, just found him again. He’s making his way upstairs.”

“Shit,” Dean says. “Shit, shit, shit.” He looks around the room frantically. If they go out the door, Myers will without a doubt see them leaving his room. “Myers is coming,” he explains to a confused-looking Y/N.

“Fucking — God dammit.” She looks around too, for a hiding spot, for a weapon, and then she spots herself in the mirror hanging on the wall and an idea comes to her. “Mark me,” she orders.

“What?” Dean snaps, his attention fully on her.

“Get over here and mark me. You told him you were going to make it visible.” She continues before Dean can protest. “Who knows if it’ll even stay, it’s not like we’re mates, right? And if it does, I don’t mind being bound to you for the rest of ever. It’s not like I’m having much luck in the relationship department anyway. But we need that knife, and we’re not going to get it if we don’t –”

“Fuck,” he says under his breath with a quick shake of his head, before he strides across the room and pushes her up against the wall just in time to hear the door click. He inhales her scent, his mouth trailing from the base of her jaw all the way down to her mating gland where it hovers as the door opens all the way. Then he bites down.

Y/N throws her head back, her fingers digging into Dean’s shoulders as his teeth sink into her, and none of it is for show. The pain is euphoric, and her senses heighten, and she suddenly wishes she hadn’t been so stringent on taking her fucking pills, because whatever this feeling is, coursing through her veins, settling in her core, she needs to feel it more. She can’t stand how dulled it is, how it just stays there, simmering underneath the surface. She wants to erupt. 

“Mm, fuck, Alpha!” she cries out, no trace of sarcasm in her voice, and Dean’s hands grip her hips tight enough to bruise them. 

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” Jim exclaims. “Got an alert that someone was in here, there’s some very valuable things in here, you see, and I just wanted to make sure —”

Dean pulls away from her neck long enough to shoot him a glare that translates to “get out or I’m going to kill you”, and Jim gets the message, backing out the door and shutting it behind him. 

“Fuck,” Dean breathes, letting his forehead fall to Y/N’s shoulder. He shouldn’t be so close to her. He should back away, give himself some space to breathe. But her scent keeps him rooted in place. It’s her usual scent; something like freshly baked sugar cookies and vanilla, sweet and enticing, but there’s something else, something —

“Are you guys okay?” Sam’s voice in his damn ear again.

Dean lifts his head and presses the button on his earpiece to reply. “Fine, Sam. Give us a second.” Then he takes the earpiece out and tosses it over his shoulder, more agitated than he should be at his brother just trying to check in.

“Dean,” she breathes, and she sounds absolutely wrecked. She brings her hands to his cheeks, forcing him to look at her. “Are you okay?” 

He nods. Her touch is like fire on his skin. He needs her. 

Y/N squeezes her thighs together. She’s never been able to scent Dean before, but he’s never been this close for this long. He’s never marked her, either. Right now his scent is breaking through the suppressants, little by little. It’s bits of cedar and leather and whiskey, and she’s never smelt anything like it, yet it is so familiar somehow. It invades her senses, and if this is what he smells like with suppressants, she’s terrified of what would happen without them.

“Dean… your scent.” She closes her eyes and inhales deeply.

“Fuck, my pills must’ve worn off, I —”

She shakes her head. “It’s dulled but… but it’s there.” Her thighs clench together again, and she needs him back on her skin. “It’s there and it’s so fucking good.”

Dean’s eyes fall to the gland on her neck, and the severity of what he’s done comes crashing into him like a wrecking ball. It’s enough to force him to take a step away from her, panic rising in his chest. “I – fuck. I marked you. I fucking marked you.”

Y/N’s fingers come up to graze the indent on her neck, and she shudders at the touch. “I told you to.”

“No, you don’t understand, Y/N –”

“I know what happens when mates get marked, Dean,” she interrupts matter-of-factly. “I’m sure this’ll fade.”

“It won’t. I – I shouldn’t have done that. Fuck. Fuck!” He turns to the wall next to him, hitting it with the side of his closed fist. 

“Dean.” Her touch on his arm is gentle and comforting, but he doesn’t turn to face her. “You need to calm down. It’s really not a big deal, I –”

Dean takes a deep breath, both hands on the wall now as he collects himself. He can’t even bring himself to look at her when he says, “You’re my mate, Y/N.”

She takes a step back, and her fading scent is what makes him finally face her. She’s halfway across the room by the time he does. 

“W-what do you mean?”

“You’re my mate, Y/N,” he repeats.

She shakes her head, her hand coming to her neck again, the teeth marks seared into her skin. “N-no. H-how? When? How – how long have you known?”

Dean takes another long, deep breath. He could lose her tonight. She could run and never come back and he wouldn’t blame her. “Since we met.”

“THREE YEARS!?” she roars. “YOU’VE KNOWN FOR THREE FUCKING YEARS!?”

“Y/N, I –”

She stalks toward him, one finger outstretched, one fist clenched by her side. She points at him as she backs him into a wall, and he’s incredibly turned on and incredibly scared at the same time. 

“You’ve known that we’re fucking mates for three years, and you didn’t feel as though that was pertinent fucking information to tell me!?”

Dean swallows. “I – it’s – there are… strings with mates. You know that. I didn’t want to ball and chain you. I didn’t want to keep you anywhere you didn’t want to be. And if – fuck – we’re hunters, Y/N. If something had happened to me, and you knew… I didn’t want you to have to live with that. With the pain that comes with losing a true mate.”

Y/N stops half a foot away and drops her accusatory finger. “What did you say?” she whispers.

“True… mates,” Dean breathes.

“We’re…? But… We never – I don’t –”

“With me on my pills, and you on your pills, I think it was enough to… so we just never…”

“But you knew,” she says, closing the gap between them, her hand coming up to caress his cheek. “You knew for so long and you watched me go on dates, had to listen about the… things I did with other Alphas… if I had mated with one of them, you –”

“You deserved to have a choice. Regardless of what I wanted, you deserved to have a choice.” 

“My choice could’ve left you depressed and alone and celibate forever, you fucking dumbass.” 

He shrugs, and her hand falls to rest over his heart. She stares at it as she continues.

“When you… marked me… I felt… I don’t know what I felt. Nothing’s ever been so intense.”

She looks up at him through her eyelashes, and he smiles softly.

“That’s the bond,” he explains, his large palm coming to rest over the hand on his chest. 

“And if we weren’t on… our blockers?”

“If we weren’t on our blockers, there’s no fucking telling how many pups we’d have running around by now.”

Y/N shivers as the thought of being bred settles in her core, and for once she’s not cursing her biology. Dean chuckles faintly at her reaction, dropping his forehead to hers. 

“We can practice in the meantime. Until you decide you want off of them.”

She inhales deeply, taking in as much of his scent as she can. “Oh, I –” another deep breath, “I’m getting off of them for sure.”

Dean lets out a borderline animalistic growl, thinking about how many times he’ll get to fuck her through that first heat. “I’m gonna stop taking my pills, too,” he says breathily.

“Yeah?”

“I had to get on rut blockers when you moved into the Bunker because I knew I wouldn’t be able to control myself. But now,” he says, spinning them both around and pinning Y/N against the wall, “now I don’t fuckin’ have to.”

“Dean,” she half gasps, half moans. He kisses the mark on her neck before licking all the way up to her jaw line and pulling back. 

“You drive me fuckin’ crazy, Omega.”

She meets his feral gaze with one of her own, a glint of mischief in her eyes. “Prove it.” 

And it might be an incredibly stupid thing to say to a horny Alpha, but it’s also Dean. And he’d never hurt her.

“Mm, fuck.” His voice is raspy and wrecked and they haven’t even done anything yet. Before Y/N can process what’s happening, he’s picking her up and throwing her onto the bed. He climbs over her, hovering for a moment, taking in her flushed cheeks, the warmth radiating off of her, her scent. “You’re beautiful,” he states plainly, like it’s the one fact in the world that he knows without a doubt to be true. 

Y/N blushes. “Thank you, Alpha.” She says it because she knows what it does to him. 

“You’re beautiful, and I’m gonna fuckin’ ruin you.” 

A gasp leaves her lips as he pushes her dress up her hips and moves down her body to the foot of the mattress, his fingertips dancing along the hem of her panties before his eyes meet with hers. She gives him a nod, and it’s all the confirmation he needs before pulling them down her legs and tossing them aside. 

He watches hungrily as she spreads her thighs, her core damn near dripping with her wetness, and if this is what it’s like when she’s on heat blockers, he can’t even begin to imagine what it’ll look like covered in her slick. His cock grows hard in his slacks at the thought, and he has to step off the bed to take off his pants and boxers before the containment grows painful. He shrugs off his suit jacket and white dress shirt too, and when he’s standing in front of the bed, fully naked, Y/N is propping herself up on her elbows to take him in.

“Holy – fuck,” is all she can get out. 

Dean chuckles deeply, one knee coming up onto the mattress as he fists his cock. “Fuck, sweetheart.” He looks her over again, pussy glistening, nipples peaked through her dress. “Fuck, I want you to – would you present for me?”

A smirk spreads across her lips, but she doesn’t say anything before flipping over and assuming the position. Ass up, legs shoulder width apart, chest resting on the mattress. 

Dean lets out a low and guttural, “Fuuuuck,” and it’s enough to make her pussy clench around nothing. She feels the mattress dip behind her, and when his cock starts to move through her folds, she almost cums right then and there. 

“I know you you wish you weren’t an Omega,” he starts, “but you’re a fuckin’ perfect one, baby.” 

She shakes her head, soft whimpers escaping her as he continues to tease her with his dick. “I’m glad I’m an Omega, because I’m yours.” 

With that, Dean loses what little self control he has left. He lines himself up with her entrance and sinks into her heat, and she feels so fucking perfect, the way she molds around his cock. The noises leaving her throat spur him on as he thrusts into her, setting a bruising pace. He wraps his hand around her shoulder for leverage, his other gripping her ass.

“Oh my fuck!” she practically screams, and he can feel how close she is, can smell it. 

“You’re gonna be a good little Omega and cum for me, aren’t you baby?” he pants, and he couldn’t be thrusting deeper if he tried.

She nods frantically. “Yesyesyes, please, Alpha, I wanna to cum. I wanna — mm, fuck — on your —”

She’s too fucked out to even finish her sentence, and Dean can feel himself about to fall over the edge. “What’s that, sweetheart? Speak up.”

“I wanna cum — oh, God! — on your knot. Fucking fill me up, Dean, please.”

He barely manages another thrust before he buries himself to the hilt, the base of his cock swelling inside her as he pumps her full of his seed.

The feeling of him filling her sends her over the edge, her pussy clenching around his cock, his knot, and she feels so full and fucked and sated.

“Oh my fucking fuuuuck,” he groans, feeling her pulse around him. “Fuck, everyone and this fuckin’ party is gonna be able to smell me inside of you.”

She moans at his words.

“Gonna have me dripping down your thighs ‘til we get back home.” His hand squeezes the globe of her ass before he leans over, getting as close to her ear as he can. “And then I’m gonna fuck you again. And again. And again. Because we got three years to make up for.” He nips at her ear playfully. “And now you’re finally mine.”

[xiaq]

Favorite fantasy series: The Folk of the Air. I do NOT understand the hate this series gets on booktok/IG. The world-building is immaculate, the politics are juicy, the writing is engaging, and the romance is a slow burn that’s secondary to the plot and character development. I will read anything that Holly Black writes.

Favorite sci/fi series: The Murderbot Diaries. These are quick, quippy, and satisfying reads. I would die for Murderbot.

Favorite romance series: Not sure if they count as a series since they’re all standalones in the same universe, but Ali Hazelwood’s books ft. Women in STEM having unrealistic romances gets an A+ from me. If you need easy beach reads with happy endings, go for one of these (Also, the first book started as Star Wars fic; neat!).

Favorite graphic novel series: I’ve been following the Heartstopper webcomic for years, but I finally purchased/ re-read the print books this year. If you want sweet, nostalgic writing with diverse queer representation and whimsical art, Heartstopper is for you. If you want a historical/educational story, I highly recommend the Marchseries, which is an autobiographical view of the civil rights movement by John Lewis. 

Favorite historical romance: I know I’m not supposed to judge a book by it’s cover, but I put off reading A Lady for a Duke despite rave reviews because I simply did not vibe with the cover. This was a terrible choice. I read this book in one euphoric sitting and then re-read it two additional times this year. The banter! The pining! The drama! 

Favorite fantasy: A Taste of Gold and Iron and its follow-up short novella Tadek and the Princess. These books may have changed my brain chemistry. I loved this world and its characters and the novella made me cry like a baby.

Favorite science fiction: The Martian. I’d read this before but I re-read it on a work trip and fell in love all over again. Such an excellent science-y sci/fi book that nonetheless feels very approachable and fun.

Favorite non-fiction: They Were Her Property is the driest book I read this year but the content was fascinating (and horrifying). If you want to interrogate your perception of white women’s role in slavery (and, to a lesser degree, the role of Christianity therin) — take your time, and be ready to adjust your worldview—especially if you think Gone with the Wind was an accurate portrayal of the south. How to Survive a Plague, on the other hand, is less dry—you can tell a journalist wrote it—but it’s very detailed. It’s rare that I don’t finish a book in one or two sittings, but this took me over a month. If you’ve ever wondered about the social history of the AIDS epidemic and how a diagnosis went from a quick death sentence to an easily manageable condition (and how hard grassroots movements had to work to get some fucking help to make that happen), this is for you.

Favorite comic: Infidel. Damn. The art. The narrative. So short but so impactful. This is horror, so be mindful.

Favorite graphic novel: This is a tossup between If You’ll Have Me, a sugary-sweet sapphic romance, and The Prince and the Dressmaker which is an equally adorable story about expressing ones true self regardless of social expectations.

Favorite WTF: Butcher and Blackbird and Bride. I’m still not sure how I feel about B&B but it was certainly an interesting way to spend two hours. Bride is on the list purely because reading the word “knot” on a print page instead of an AO3 tab felt illegal.

Favorite feel-good/comedy: Monstrous Regiment. I’ve read this book so many times and, after the election, I read it again. I doubt any other book will surpass what has become an emotional support story for me.

Favorite YA: Cemetery Boys (Magic! Mystery! Queerness!) She Drives me Crazy(Athletics! Misunderstandings! Enemies to lovers! Queerness!), and A Little Bit Country (Country music! Thinly veiled Dolly Parton references! Queerness!) (Hm. Seems to be a theme here).

Favorite Sports Romance: Icebreaker (the Graziadei one, not the Hannah Grace one). You know how a lot of hockey books (my own included) can be light on the actual hockey? Not the case with Icebreaker. The character development was lovely, but the hockey was divine. Graziadei clearly knows and loves the sport.

Favorite historical fiction: What the Wind Knows (Mystery! Time Traveling! Love! Ireland!) and Kindred (Mystery! Time Traveling! Love! The Antebellum South!).

Favorite Space Odyssey: Gideon + Nona the Ninth. I had to make a special category because neither sci/fi nor fantasy feels appropriate for this yet incomplete series which is as rollicking good fun as it is completely confounding. I still have no idea what’s happening but I can’t wait to read the next one.

Favorite pleasant surprise: A Court of Mist and Fury. I waited so long to read the ACOTAR series because I got such conflicting reports from folks. I took the advice of a reader I trust and powered through the first book. ACOMAF was worth the contextualizing journey. I loved it. I’m still working through the rest of the series but this book was an unexpected joy.

Least favorite book: Lol, no. We don’t play that game here.

[phantomdialogue]

˗ˏˋ. ݁₊ ✶ ˖ 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐛𝐲 𝐚𝐥𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐳𝐞𝐥𝐰𝐨𝐨𝐝 - 𝟓.𝟓/𝟓 ☆ . ݁ ˖ˎˊ˗

premise: elsie hannaway needs a stable, well-paying job to escape a life of endless fake dates and teaching undergraduates in order to live. jack smith-turner meets elsie when she's playing the role of his brother's girlfriend… only to meet her again as she interviews for a faculty role at MIT. confused by her separate lives, jack ends up tangled amongst them while elsie deciphers how best to take jack down to get the job she so desperately wants.

couple: jonathan (jack) smith-turner and elsie hannaway

tropes: stem romance, workplace (ish) romance, rivals to lovers, (kind of) one bed, miscommunication

review below!

review:

oh, ali hazelwood, i was not familiar with your game. i am obsessed with this book and this couple and it's one of the few books that i feel like i could reread happily. admittedly, i had picked up this book originally back in january but only made it a few chapters before setting it down and simply forgetting to continue it. HOWEVER oh i wish i had picked it back up back then so badly because whatever reason i set it down originally was completely gone this time around. i fell in love with ali hazelwood's writing and her characters and the warmth and authenticity of the world she builds.

jack. smith. turner. holy shit. he's my number one book boyfriend of the year. that's crazy for me to say out loud because i've read 3 emily henry books this year but jack smith-turner did something to me. he's hot. he's smart. he's selfless. he's kind. he's a little tortured. he's just the perfect example of all the things that make up a good book boyfriend rolled into one. his relationship with elsie is truly so fun to read and seeing the way he understands her on levels she hasn't been understood before just continues to make you long for a fictional man. the way he cares so deeply about the people important to him in life makes you love him even more and i wish i could read another book with him in it.

elsie hannaway. i loved elsie. she felt so real and relatable (almost painfully so) and like someone you could meet and know in real life. she wasn't the annoying kind of fmc where she's insecure and unsure of herself just because that's "who she is" but rather because she has reason to be. watching her be uncomfortable around jack who is so sure of himself and encourages her to be solely who/what she wants was wonderful. her banter with all of the characters but most specifically jack is so well written and feels natural for them. she's a bright light in the book despite how dark she feels inside.

overall, this was a very pleasant surprise to end november with and i only wish i had read it sooner because it's truly that good. i'll have to go ahead and do an ali hazelwood binge to end the year and i'm already looking forward to her next book in february!

q & a:

are they endgame? - these two... i adore these two. i think they really become such a strong couple in this book and it's not one where i go away thinking that they've got anything to work on really. we see how much elsie has grown and how much they've grown around each other to encapsulate one another in their lives. jack feels like a very stable mmc where we don't question anything with him. he is how he is and that's not going to change and that's a good thing. i think that they both have such a way with each other and it will keep them as endgame.

did i cringe? - there are some silly physics/stem moments but i think it makes you laugh more than ever cringe. ali hazelwood has some funny character moments but none that stand out extremely in a bad way. they are "quirky" more than being "cringey" and it works for her style and characterization. the little bubble of her books in the modern world is well crafted and feels realistic rather than an uneducated guess at an academia setting.

favorite part? - ali hazelwood has become another author where i'm obsessed with her characters. i loved every one of them. i talked about jack and elsie obviously but i think the side characters also add so much warmth to this book. i adore greg and he's such a great representation of someone on the aroace spectrum. he's so understanding of jack and what kind of brother he is. cece is a fun character to put alongside elsie. they are both opposites and yet work so well together. their moment at the end of the book felt so great in really instilling so much faith in their friendship despite their differences. millicent's relationship with jack brought so much to his character and the story as well. the side characters make the story feel more authentic and realistic in the best way and i truly adored them.

least favorite part? - my one little nitpick is the pacing and even that i'm not truly complaining about. you could see how confused i was when we hit what i figured would be the biggest conflict of the book at only 50% through. but even then, i don't have a full problem with it because i love where the book went after that as well. i think it just makes for a slightly odd feeling at the halfway mark but when you're thinking of the book as a whole, there really is no big problem with it. it's the only reason this is 5.5 stars instead of 6 stars honestly.

favorite quotes (some spoilers here, of course, but minimal):

I’d give everyone the me they wanted, needed, craved, and in exchange they’d care about me.

“Elsie?” My name, again. Said like the universe made that word for him alone.

“Code-switching has nothing to do with erasing who you are and twisting what’s left of you."

“Not everyone wants you to be someone else, Elsie.” He’s wrong about that, but I can smell his skin. It’s good in a way that’s primeval. Almost evolutionary. I hate it. “And I definitely wouldn’t want you to be George.” “And why is that?” He presses his lips together. He’s even closer now. Surprisingly earnest. “It would be a waste.” “A waste of what?” “Of you.”

The electron to my nucleus, constantly spinning around me in the most annoying of orbits.

“Bold of you to assume that the real me is my best hand.” That stupid, crooked half smile is back. “Foolish of you to think it isn’t.”

“Because this is not your character arc, Elsie. More like a . . . character bump.”

"I’d love to know what you’re thinking.” “I think a lot about how much I hate you,” I say with no conviction. “I think a lot about how much you hate me, too.”

I didn’t know who you were till last week. Aside from the girl Jack talks about when he gets drunk.

“I’m at my most comfortable around you,” I say. And then, because honesty: “And also at my least. But that’s because you’re an asshole, and unlikely to ever change.”

“Don’t let me fall asleep,” I yawn into his neck. “We’re supposed to be doing it.” “We are. We’re going at it like animals. Just close your eyes.”

All the Elsies I’ve created to fit all the worlds I’ve inhabited, all the people in them. He’s stripping them off me one by one, like he has since the day we met.

There’s something unsaid in this. Because I want to know your life, maybe, or Because I want to know you.

I wonder if it’ll ever end. I wonder if all these beautiful, momentous things I feel for him will ever settle into something ordinary. I can’t imagine they will.

[miniwritesrefs]

2024 Book List

Books read: Approx. 14+ (some books missing from this list)

Trials of Apollo [1] - Rick Riordan

I was a Percy Jackson kid in the late stages of high school, I jumped on the train late, and never finished. Trials of Apollo made me want to read them again--especially because of references that I just did not fully understand as it called back to other books XD Apollo is the character of all time though, love to see this man now boy go through it. If anyone had to be humbled, I'm glad it was him so he could become a good dad in the future and possibly pass that on to the other gods (x to doubt).

Some Faraway Place [Audio Book] - Lauren Shippen

I'm still a Rose un-enjoyer, but the book itself was incredibly enjoyable. It fed my Damien Enjoyer cravings, and Rose's story in and of itself is interesting, between her family and relationships, but I just... don't vibe with her. It's okay to not like people, she's one of them, I don't hate her. Gave me intense inspo for a TBS game.

Jackaby [Audio Book] - William Ritter

Jackaby was an incredibly interesting book. While I can't put this one into words, it was highly enjoyable, and the narration was top notch! Supernatural, and banshees, and werewolves oh my. A funky little Sherlock Holmes type.

The Cure for Burnout [Ironically Unfinished] - Emily Ballestros

Hahaha.

Garlic and the Vampire [Graphic Novel] - Bree PaulsenGarlic and the Witch [Graphic Novel] - Bree Paulsen

Garlic is such a little baby, I love Bree Paulsen's graphic work, and that's all there is to say on the matter.

Into the Pit [Unfinished] - Scott Cawthon

LBR I just read it for the one story. Will try to finish the others another time.

Indebted to the Vampires [1] - Erin Bedford

UH. So it's host club fanfic with ocs, but bad host club fanfic. Also a little smutty, but just a little clunky. 

Wicked Appetite [Audio Book] - Janet Evanovich

It had an okay concept! The narration made it extra hard, and I hated Dissel's personality. The gluttony charms (gluttonoids??) had awful effects, and sure it made sense but I didn't like them dfdgh. A one off read.

Bride [Unfinished] - by Ali Hazelwood

LMAO I, couldn't do it. They named the girl Misery and- Despite this books placement on the page, I'm pretty sure I bought this book in January and just couldn't get through it. And then I read the content warnings on the website at the end of the year and I cant believe they just had this one sitting in the front of Target like a prize...

The Hunger Games [Book and Audio Book interchangably]

This book was better than I remember and yet more emotional (for me) than I remember. Just getting through that first iconic scene of Katniss volunteering for Prim made me teary and emotional. The way they all banded together the moment she did, a silent act of solidarity. That in itself felt like the true first moment of rebellion in a way. It's terrible to think of, kids so young, going into an arena knowing they're bound to die. And the twist of them being told they could both live, only to have it snatched away--if it were Cato and Glimmer(?), there would have been no hesitation, only Katniss could come up with a stunt like that. The worldbuilding was great, and I know we see more of it in the next book, I just have to... get to it. I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT THE DOG PART, AND I'M STILL MAD ABOUT IT, WTF--Truly I must have blocked that part out. That was so rude dfghgj

Aisle Nine [Audio Book] - Ian X Cho

Black Friday apocalypse? Yeah. Post apocalyptic apocalyptic setting where the main characters are older teens working retail. The plot twist was interesting, the side characters were goofy (in a good way). A tale about hope in hopelessness, with a bit of that YA romance aspect sprinkled in. Wasn't *unbearable*, but end game was always apparent. I kept forgetting the MC's name throughout the story wheeeze (Sorry Casper- oop I mean Jasper). 

The Week Before [Dubiously Finished] - Scott Cawthon

Choose your own adventure of Ralph! Phone Guy gets a name! Phone Guy has a daughter,,, yeesh, poor guy. Fnaf's biggest fan and they did him dirty like this, can't believe.

Books I'm looking forward to finishing:

The Cinnamon Bun Book Store - Laurie Gilmore

Reflected Light - F.Nevarez

[azsazz]

You didn't like Bride? May I ask why?

I’ve never read an Ali hazelwood book before but I knew her stories are like fanfic turned books (which is basically what I’m trying to do too lol) but it did feel like a fanfic to me.

I think it was just another overhyped book on tiktok mostly. The story was easy to read and quick too, but I feel like there could’ve been so much more done with it because there are some incredible a/b/o stories out there and its just kind of surprising how into it people are when the book is pretty mid.

And the third act scene was so stupid there was nothing leading up to it. And I always think the spice scenes aren’t that spicy but that’s me with most books so that’s a me thing lol.

Overall I just think there’s better representation of a/b/o and she’s getting all this attention and credit for a mediocre representation of it 😅

[cosmiccannibalcamille]

COMING SOON: Jupiter Returns, an Astrology Novel

I've been buzzing about this for months, and the moment is almost here! My debut novel, Jupiter Returns, is about to launch on Kickstarter, and I couldn't be more thrilled to share it with you. Ever wondered what happens when The Devil Wears Prada collides with your daily horoscope? Now's your chance to find out. Get an exclusive preview of the book before anyone else, and prepare to embark on a cosmic adventure like no other! 

Join the Jupiter Returns Pre-Launch List

Wait, What's Jupiter Returns?

Jupiter Returns tells the story of my astrology alter-ego Cosmic Cannibal, a plucky, daydreamy Gemini who quits her fancy marketing job to chase a dream: becoming an astrologer in Denver, Colorado. With the rare and powerful Jupiter Return transit promising good fortune, Cosmic has only a few months to secure her dream horoscope writing job. But as she dives into fierce competition and the high stakes of the astrology world, a shocking discovery about her own birth chart flips her world upside down. Oh, and did I mention the sizzling flirtations with not one, but TWO irresistible men? 🌟💫

Why YOU Will Love Jupiter Returns

If you're a fan of chick lit novels like Bridget Jones's Diary and Confessions of a Shopaholic, or romcoms by Ali Hazelwood and Lizzy Dent, or you LOVE super funny, feminist-focused TV shows like Fleabag and The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, you’ll feel right at home with Jupiter Returns. This novel blends humor, astrology, romance, and feminism into a fresh, fun story about chasing your dreams and discovering who you really are.

Exclusive Kickstarter Perks!

I’m inviting you to be part of this exciting journey of publishing Jupiter Returns and getting it out into the world. If you’re unfamiliar, here’s how kickstarter works: creators (like me!) launch projects by setting funding goals and deadlines. Backers (like you!) pledge money to help meet these goals, receiving rewards based on their contribution if the project reaches its target.

But this isn't just a crowdfunding campaign—it's your ticket to be one of the first to snag a copy of Jupiter Returns! By pledging to this campaign, you're not only ensuring the successful launch of this astro-romcom, but you're also securing your spot as one of the first readers to dive into the cosmic literary adventure.

And guess what? You get some awesome rewards for your support!

Highlights for Kickstarter Supporters include:

Personal Chart Readings: Get a personalized chart reading from me! 20, 30, and 60-minute readings—as well as a LIVE 60-minute reading with me—are all on the table. 

Exclusive PDF: Dive deeper into astrology with a special PDF on astrology, horoscopes, and the significance of Sun/Jupiter in the birth chart.

Digital, Paperback, and SIGNED Copies: Choose your preferred format of Jupiter Returns, and get your hands on a signed copy!

Audiobook Narrated by Yours Truly: Hear the story come to life in my own voice.

FREE Paid Subscription to The Cosmic Almanac: Yep, get FULL ACCESS to my archive of monthly horoscopes, birth chart insights, and exclusive podcast episodes.

In-Person Art/Astrology Day Retreat: Another kickstarter-exclusive event! A FULL day retreat combining art and astrology—perfect for deepening your cosmic connections and having a blast with me!

Join Pre-Launch List

Join Me on This Cosmic Journey

By supporting my Kickstarter, you’re not just helping to publish a book; you’re joining a community of like-minded readers and astrology fans who have been aching for a novel that fuses together fiction and astrology in this completely unique way. 

So, Are YOU Ready? Are YOU ready to embark on a journey? Jupiter Returns isn't just a novel. This book is about healing and having faith in yourself; it's about going after what you want in a BIG way. It's a book for anyone who's ever felt lost, sought guidance from the stars, or craved an escape from reality.

Click here to read the first chapter of Jupiter Returns and get a sneak peek into this one-of-a-kind astrology novel.  

Stay tuned for the official Kickstarter launch, and in the meantime, join the pre-launch list on the ~official~ Jupiter Returns page, and PLEASE SHARE THIS!!

[jessread-s]

✩⚛️🧡Review:

I did not think anything could top “The Love Hypothesis” until I read “Love, Theoretically”!

Theoretical physicist Elsie Hannaway wants nothing more than to land her dream job at MIT so she can leave her adjunct teaching position and fake girlfriend gig behind her. The only problem? Jack Smith—the older brother of her favorite client and the experimental physicist who ruined her mentor’s career—sits on the hiring committee.

I LOVED this book because I personally connected with Elsie like no other Ali Hazelwood heroine before her. One of Elsie’s main inner conflicts in the book is her struggle to show those closest to her who she really is. Instead, she embodies different versions of herself to please others so she doesn’t feel the sting of rejection if something goes wrong. As someone with people pleasing tendencies, I have never felt so understood! 

I also really loved Hazelwood’s incorporation of the fake relationship trope in this book. Having already written about a fake relationship between her FMC and MMC in “The Love Hypothesis,” I appreciated how Hazelwood shakes things up in this novel by having Elsie fake date her love interest’s brother! This was new and exciting for me to read about and also nicely contributed to the tension between Elsie and Jack in the book. 

Elsie and Jack’s romance is absolute perfection in this book! Their progression from rivals to lovers is very natural and I thought it was very clever of Hazelwood to set their rivalry “against the backdrop of academic politics” (as she puts in her author’s note). I was not aware of the feud between theoretical and experimental physicists, so I found “Love, Theoretically” informative as a result.

Cross-posted to: Instagram | Amazon | Goodreads | StoryGraph

@ever-so-ali @berkleypub-blog

[readwing]

Anyways, here's the books I read last year (that weren't manga or cookbooks)-

The Beautiful and Damned, F. Scott Fitzgerald

Sister, Kjell Ola Dahl (#......like 7 or 8 in the Oslo Detective series)

American Prometheus (Oppenheimer biography), Kai Bird

Matilda, Roald Dahl

Blackmail and Bibingka, Mia P. Manansala (#3 in Tita Rosie's Kitchen)

Homicide and Halo-Halo, Mia P. Manansala (#2 in Tita Rosie's Kitchen)

The Moving Finger (Miss Marple #4), Agatha Christie

The Love Hypothesis, Ali Hazelwood

Ymir, Rich Larson

I'm not sure how to put these in an order of what I liked the most because I read them for different reasons so I'll just do a drive by:

Ymir - Started with the pedal to the floorboards and did not let up one bit. One of my favorite flavors of sci-fi is when the narrative is unabashedly About Somewhere Else. Loved how the protagonist could not move through the story without somehow cutting everyone around him, and I loved the traumatic, unresolved tension between him and his brother. Probably my favorite book by vibes alone

Sister - I adore the Oslo Detective series, for reasons that possibly scratch my brain and my brain alone. It's so dry and uninterested in selling you melodrama. I want to study the way this guy writes his interview scenes; they are the main way the detective work gets done and they work so fluidly. They never slow down the pace to make sure you're keeping up. This was a particularly fun installment, seeing one of the lead two detectives on his own doing PI work after having quit, although the cases took brutal turns.

The Moving Finger - Loved it. Love how AC is just out there inventing characters whole cloth that you'll never meet again, but as soon as you meet them you're like 'oh, wow, you're not just a character you're like a full ass person.' I loved this installment in particularly because the dynamics between the characters were just so fascinating?? Once again, I've yet to correctly guess an AC mystery. Better luck next time.

Matilda - read it for a fic I am writing. Spent most of it getting big feelings and marveling at how completely fucking accurate the live action Mara Wilson movie was. Like there were entire scenes where I was like 'this is the movie, this is exactly what happened in the fucking movie.' Great book, but also wow that movie was a wonderfully accurate adaptation.

American Prometheus - Two things I like in a biography: research and calling out when the research didn't yield anything and/or yielded contradictory records. While I struggled to get through the political back half, particularly the bits leading up to the trial, this book was an interesting look on the development of scientific ethics in the twentieth century and on how today's scientific community today is still shaped by the political machinations of the past.

Both of the Tita Rosie's Kitchen books - it's a food-themed setting for a murder mystery book (which is like it's own genre now, which is cool). Relatively easy read. I think the author is still growing into herself, but one thing that she does well is mystery-plotting. Another thing is food descriptions.

The Love Hypothesis - Mainly read it because I owned a copy. It was... probably more enjoyable for people who like romance. Given that it is a romance book. But I do try to read a bit of everything, because I think each genre has something to bring to the table story-wise. This one had some very nice getting-to-know-you moments between the characters, who had good chemistry, but I think where it was weakest was in giving similar moments to the side characters, who often felt one dimensional. The story beats about feminism and institutional unfairness could've been less heavy-handed. For something that was relevant to the plot, it often felt like the author knew they were supposed to say something about it but couldn't figure out how to say it in a way that hadn't been parroted before, which is a shame because the scenes where the protagonist actually had to deal with those issues played well.

[dramionediscussion]

Hi Asks!

How do you feel about the growing number of writers who are getting book deals through fanfic?

I can't really explain why, but it kind of makes me sad. I know the authors themselves truly love fandom and they deserve all their current and future success. But a cynical part of me hates the way literary agents are looking in on fandom and picking off the best of the best, it feels so manufactured.

(Also, how writers are often pressured to take down their fic before they publish their original works. Like it's something to be ashamed of, or they're 'too good' for this world once they make it big).

I think it is cool. It's awesome that authors are being approached and given deals from writing fanfiction.

But I agree with you. It does feel like they are being shamed for their fanfic by being made to take it down. Very rarely do you see authors mention that they started off writing fanfic and tell you about it. Most times, people still look down upon fanfics, so when readers hear that the author started with that, they think the author isn't good enough to write a "proper novel". Also, when people find out that an author's novel was originally based on fanfic, they immediately dismiss the story, thinking its silly or bad quality.

EL James wrote 50 Shades based on her Twilight fanfic. Obviously, there are issues with that story and its editing, but people were quick to laugh at it because it was fanficton. That writer of the After series wrote her story based on a Harry Styles fanfic, which people mocked. A very famous rom-com author, Ali Hazelwood, wrote her first book, which was super popular, from a Reylo fanfic she did. When people heard about that after the book was released and loved, it did make them look twice at the author's work and put off other people from reading her stuff. (Her second novel was just as great, so people quickly forgot her Reylo days and realized that she is a really talented author).

But there is nothing wrong with fanfiction. It's a fantastic way to develop your writing skills. There is nothing to look down upon. And publishers should let the author leave their stiff online, don't remove it, and have that author pretend that this is not where they came from.

- Lisa

[mermaidsirennikita]

You mentioned how authors are forced to write differently with trad publishing vs indie , which ones do u mean? I'm curious...

"Forced" probably isn't the right word, but "heavily encouraged" [by the companies signing the checks] is closer.

Here's the thing with traditional publishing right now. You walk into a bookstore or Target or whatever--you may very well find some very high heat books. I've seen Sierra Simone in Target. However, all those titles were originally published independently, and Sierra works with a publisher who essentially strikes a deal where they handle print and get the books into those stores, whereas (from what I can tell) she maintains the digital rights.

Traditional publishing offers some releases that are quite high heat, but like... Tessa Bailey's trad books, for example, aren't touching the upper echelons of indie in terms of heat. Because trad is meant to appeal to as broad an audience as possible, and tbh, trad has been swinging safer in a lot of ways.

Ali Hazelwood's books are praised for being high heat--The Love Hypothesis only has one full sex scene, though it's long. If you've read Ali's fanfiction (... which I have) she writes way dirtier than that. She mentioned on a podcast that when they were shopping TLH, she was encouraged by her agent to trim the sex down to make her MS more appealing to publishers. That's the kind of thing I'm talking about.

With historical romance, I think there's a little more tension, because trad is very confused about who they're marketing historicals to. Like, some of them still seem to be pointed towards conservative white ladies imo--women who want a very sort of... straight, missionary, wait until the wedding night type of historical. Whereas I think they should be making more of an appeal to a younger gen. Some of them seem to be basically giving up on that, though. But I digress.

ANYWAY.

Authors I can think of right now--Minerva Spencer writes indie historical romance under the pen name S.M. LaViolette. Some of the LaViolette books are straight up erotic historical romance so obviously they're higher heart than her trad books. But even those that aren't are much higher heat than her traditional books. Like Hyacinth for example--not an erotic historical imo, but it has waaaay more sex scenes, and more creativity (hero coming untouched during a whipping scene, butt stuff which you HARDLY EVER see in trad historicals).

Joanna Shupe has published trad and indie HR. I consider her books on the higher heat end of trad historicals. However, if you read her indie novellas, they are higher heat, they're kinkier--all that. Lol never mind her mafia romances which are a very different game. In indie, Joanna did a BIG age gap romance, a virgin auction romance, a scene where the hero licked up his come and the heroine's ~virgin's blood~ after he deflowers her... you're not gonna see that in trad lol.

Eva Leigh also writes on the higher end of the heat scale in trad, but her indie historicals are different--and it isn't just the explicitness or quantity. As with Joanna, it's the kink, too. The creativity. She wrote MFM, age play, etc. You can just go a lot further.

And I mean? I would also say that you can see a big difference in authors that aren't hybrid. Grace Callaway has tons of sex scenes in her historicals, and they're long and creative and she DOES in fact include butt stuff in the books! Nicola Davidson does really fun poly historicals. When Sierra Simone wrote historicals, there was obviously group sex, kinky stuff, etc.

You just see a really big chasm, bigger than I'd say you see with other subgenres, between trad HR and indie HR. And I can only assume that it's because of an industry pressure. With indie, you can do whatever you want. With trad, there's a standard to conform to because before you sell to readers, you're selling to a publisher.

[justmybookthots]

Love, Theoretically

4.25/5 stars

Technically, this is a reread. I was feeling low because of another book yesterday, and I really wanted a good pick-me-up before I spiralled into a slump. And given how much I freaking loved this book the first time (I read it a week or so after it first got published?), I was hoping it would do the trick. 

It did. I just finished rereading the entire thing a few hours ago. Oh my gosh. I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that this is by the same woman who wrote my romcom archnemesis: Love Hypothesis. How do you go from writing… Adam Driver (Carlton? Ca… Something) to fucking Jack? (And yes, Ali needs to consider giving her male leads less basic white boy names. That said, Levi’s name wasn’t so basic. His personality though…)

Jack is my favourite Hazelwood hero by FAR. Of course, Hazelwood technically only has two distinguishable heroes, since Adam and Levi are just differently named versions of each other. My point is, Jack is… wonderful. He’s blonde—I’m partial to fair-haired male characters, okay? He’s calm. Humorous. Communicative. Understanding. Emotionally intelligent. Like, look at this: 

And to sum it up:

He wasn’t perfect, obviously, but I… My brain was short-circuiting at so many of his scenes, his actions, his easy banter, his sense of humour. There’s one scene where Elsie thinks they’re about to have sex, but she’s clearly too tired for it, and he just plays along:

I loved their banter, omg. Some parts, not so much, but most of it was hilarious. It isn’t only with Elsie; Jack’s exchanges with his grandmother were gold, too. Millicent Smith made me crack up in that singular scene when they had tea—I think she’s a phenomenal character.  It’s amusing and admirable how Jack could respond to and handle her eccentricities without batting an eyelid. 

I really wanted to give this a five stars. I really did. I still do. I mean, the first half of the book before Jack and Elsie got together is fantastic, and is possibly the highlight of the entire story. Hazelwood nailed the tension between both leads. Furthermore, I love the throughline of the story: Elsie suffers from chronic People Pleaser Disorder where she constantly plays different versions of herself to—you guessed it—please different people. She does this incessantly, not just when she fake-dates but in many aspects of her life. As someone who dislikes the fake dating trope, it’s nice to see that this trope is being tied to an ongoing character development arc. (It also helps that she isn’t fake-dating Jack. I’m so, so tired of fake-dating between two romantic leads.) Jack is privy to all this through observation, and he encourages her constantly to be nothing more than herself. 

This theme has, to be honest, been giving me some food for thought. I’m about to derail, but I do think women are societally expected (more so than their male counterparts) to be many different things. I don’t want to go too far in depth about it because this isn’t the place, but I remember (this is still going to be a bit out of left field, but this is my reading journal, so I’ll say what I want) reading somewhere that women are likelier to be better at masking autism than men. Simply put, I believe it’s because men can be themselves, whatever that may entail, and not have to apologise for it. It’s why I’m annoyed by male characters like Adam, or just the male “grump” archetype, because men rarely need to be polite. There’s almost no flak for them if they behave in a way that lacks any kind of grace.  

But if a woman behaves the same way, she’s simply put: a bitch.

Anyway. I digress. All I’ll say on this subject is that I really enjoyed the overarching theme regarding Elsie’s character growth. 

However, this is not a perfect book. There are some points that I don’t love:

The smut. This is the biggest issue. Jack is very giving, which is great, and he is BIG on consent, which is also great. I can’t put a finger on why I don’t love how the smut is written though. Whatever it is, it’s a me problem. Ali’s writing style for smut isn’t to my taste. It doesn’t feel very… sexy? The whole scene where Jack and Elsie made out and did something sexual for the first time was really awkward. I am a firm believer that consent CAN be written in an attractive way, but this was not it. 

Twilight is not it. I’m sorry, Elsie.

I do not understand why Jack is so muscular. Big, I get because that's genetic or whatever, but why muscular??? How is a nerd who spends his days in a lab getting that muscle tone? That allusion to him playing basketball in a gym on certain weekends is NOT enough.

The PDA between Jack and Elsie at George’s house near the end of the story made me cringe. Please stop. 

Adam’s cameo. Gag. I read this book to get away from Adam, not return to his presence.

Now. Going back to more things I did love, that I haven’t mentioned yet:

Jack and the article. No, not the one he wrote when he was seventeen. The fucking article he wrote at the end as penance was AMAZING

Elsie running back to him and falling apart and saying that he probably thought they’d broken up forever because of how she’d ignored him after their fight. To which he, very calmly, goes: Nope. Who said we broke up? I was giving you space, just as you asked me for. 

GEORGINA/GEORGE. Zero girl-on-girl hate in this book. I have to give Ali credit where it’s due; there is none of this in any of her books, if I’m not wrong. Instead of having Georgina, who “stole” Elsie’s job, be the stereotypical catty bitch, she turns out to be an amazing character who saves Elsie’s career. I love how the literary landscape of female characters has changed in recent years.

“Manuscript I’d love to finish” being called MILF is something I am claiming for myself. 

Never thought I’d say this two months ago, but I absolutely loved this book. Now my biggest question is: will this be an outlier in Hazelwood’s repertoire, or will she be ever-evolving into something new and better with future books? (Bad Boy of chess, though? Really?)

FINE. I’ll stick around to find out. 

- 16 Aug 2023

[queenvreads]

REVIEW: Love, Theoretically by Ali Hazlewood

3/5 ⭐⭐⭐

I think I am over Ali Hazelwood.. for now.

I absolutely loved "The Love Hypothesis" – it was SO fresh SO amazing! "Love On the Brain" was pretty similar, but still enjoyable (yes I really enjoyed it, I know many did not)

However, with this latest book, it finally feels like the same formula copied and pasted, only it lacks the charisma and sparkle of the last two.

You know how it goes:

-Elsie, the heroine, is all insecure and clueless about why the guy likes her.

-She has those "oh" moments when things finally click in her mind.

-Cues that are right in front of her? Yeah, she totally misses them.

-Sex? Nah, not interested. But once she and the hero get together, it's the best thing ever.

And, OF COURSE there's the whole woman in STEM thing, where Elsie faces negative experiences and struggles to defend herself. On the other hand, the hero, Jack, is a gorgeous, glorious science man, who is self-assured and confident. He's been into her since forever (of course) even before she knew it. He's successful and well-off, but he's all about helping her reach her potential. (We know this story already)

Oh, and the "villain" in the story? You can spot them from a mile away. It's like you're reading the same plot in different books.

Honestly, it's a bit disappointing that it follows the same pattern as her other books. I was hoping for some fresh elements. But hey, if things change in the future, I wouldn't mind checking it out. 🥲

✍️Befriend me on Goodreads: ⭐HERE⭐

[mistwraiths]

3 stars

I really enjoyed Ali Hazelwood's The Love Hypothesis and I even liked her Love On The Brain despite it being almost exactly the same story with characters having different names but the same basic personality. So if you like her formula, these novellas will be for you!! I found her formula to be nice but tiring. There's absolute nothing unique or special about these and she doesn't turn anything on it's head. Take them for what they are. Short stories written for a trope.

Under One Roof was actually my least favorite despite it being the one where the characters knew each other and were around each other the longest I think. Mara is basically Olive and that MC in LotB. The guy... Liam I think??... is the same quiet, hard to read, very tall, big man with a big dick. And yeah, that's about it. I actually think there's less science stuff in this one than the others.

Stuck with You is probably the fastest pace one and also the one that I liked the problem of. The relationship between Sadie and Erik was SO INSTANT LOVEY it was ridiculous, especially since they barely know each other for 24 hours before things are ruined. I wouldn't actually label this as miscommunication, but as wrongfully assuming things because of things lining up badly and taking it without knowing the other side. I usually get annoyed when characters automatically assume the worst but I understand WHY she did and believe it to fully believable to assume it.

Below Zero, I liked the idea and trope of it, but didn't really care about the execution or characters or romance. I'd prefer if she had gotten more injured. Hannah was actually completely different from all of Ali's FMCs so far being the little cold, not friendly person. I liked the space stuff. But again, the romance was just not it and Ian was barely memorable.

Also, don't worry, Ali's ability to write the MOST awkward sex scenes you'll ever read is still there!!

At this point, I think she really needs to shake things up. Give us actual different characters that feel different. Give us POV of the love interest. Stop with the oh he's so big and tall, I'm so small; etc.

They are still enjoyable though. It's like eating candy. A small sweet slice where you don't have to do much but mindlessly read.

[beyondthedustjacket]

Love, Theoretically ⁕ Book Review

This review contains spoilers. You have been warned!

Overall Thoughts ⁕ This book was so refreshing! It has single-handedly pulled me out of a years long reading slump. It’s the first story in a long time that I genuinely say I had fun reading! No stressing out about traumatic character demises, no overwhelming or dense worldbuilding, no putting it down for months before finally picking it up again. Just straight up, good, I-Want-A-Man-Like-Jack vibes.

Synopsis ⁕ Elsie Hannaway is an adjunct professor and trying her best to make her monthly rent, which leads her to taking gigs as a fake girlfriend. But when she puts her best foot forward for her dream career at MIT, Jack Smith-Turner stands in the way at every turn, in more ways than she can count.

Warnings ⁕ Chronic illness (Type 1 Diabetes), discussions of a parental death, explicit sexual content, medical situations, mentions of alcohol (a few side characters get drunk at a party), misogyny and sexism, power dynamics, sexual harassment.

Rating ⁕ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Plot

Going back to my reading roots with some sweet, sweet contemporary romance. There’s just something about a girl being so overwhelmed by her life, only to be reinvigorated by the thought of sticking it to her worst enemy... who has been in love with her the entire time. The plot progression at no point felt too fast or slow. It was a steady ride of genuine growth between Elsie and Jack. From one-sided loathing to “I want to eat you out for the rest of my life”, their relationship with one another is nothing short of sincere and considerate.

Characters

Elsie Hannaway ⁕ I love her! She is a great representation of what it’s like to be in your late twenties with seemingly no relief in sight. Her arc of breaking away from those who stifle her is very well done. She feels real. She has real concerns, real problems, real insecurities. After finishing this book, Elsie has skyrocketed to being one of my favorite protagonists. Jack Smith-Turner ⁕ This man. This man. One might say I need this man so fucking bad. And if one did say that, they would be so fucking correct. He’s so casually domineering and unapologetically interested in everything about Elsie. Sure, I was constantly saying how much of a dick he is out loud to myself, but I was doing it with a smile on my face.

Things I Liked

I listened to the audio book for this one, and the narrator, Thérèse Plummer, was great! If this story ever receives an adaptation, I’m going to need her to play every role in various costumes. If you looked up Ali Hazelwood in the dictionary, you’d find the word ‘hilarious’ next to her name. I can’t emphasize how much I smiled during this book! I couldn’t stop smiling — literally kicking my feet and giggling the entire time! Elsie is actually me in disguise, excluding the science stuff. All the way down to eating a cheese block in her room while reading Twilight fanfiction. Carbon copy.

Things I Disliked

The ending felt a little abrupt. Just Elsie handing him a letter was a little anti-climatic for me. I was confused when there wasn’t more after that. Also, the fact that we didn’t meet the infamous Kirk! I need a short story about Cece and her new beau as soon as possible! Just a little spin-off, please and thank you, Ali!

Other Notes

Once again, I want to acknowledge that this book was genuinely fun. I had a great time with it! I think it will be the one that can look back on and say that it successfully pulled me out of a years long reading slump.

[shadowsimpsforpixels]

This is literally me just ranting about The Love Hypothesis. Spoilers?? Opinions are welcome of course. Seriously somebody take my phone I will not stop ranting.

The book has one explicit scene. There is some talk of sexual activity in the book, but it’s not much.

There was a sexual harassment scene in the book, just in case it triggers anybody. A small warning if you ever plan to read the book.

The Love Hypothesis - Ali Hazelwood

The book I read previously before Icebreaker was The Love Hypothesis, I loved the humor in it but the age gap was… a LOT. 8 years is a bit much, they’re both legal, yes. It’s not illegal but the thought that she was just hitting double digits when this man was already a legal adult (18) is actually insane. The book was funny, as for the explicit scenes, I wouldn’t know. I skip those so if you want any help with that aspect I am NOT the person to ask. (I am reading the scenes in Icebreaker purely cause @shark-orbiting-the-sun is reading the book with me and we like to make fun of the cringy scenes, p.s. every sex scene is a cringy scene.) Completely ignoring the age gap, the relationship was really sweet, I LOVE when the male mc only has a soft spot for the female mc. Not to mention the fake dating trope is my favorite thing EVER. (Not rlly I’m a sucker for enemies to lovers but ignore that.) The scenes with Anh being oblivious and making her do stuff with her “boyfriend” is adorable. Olive had the most supportive friend group ever and I always love that in a book. Holden was probably my favorite character in this book, he was funny and accepting of Olive and I loved it. The relationships in the book will have you rooting for them, at least it did for me. There was only two problems for me, and they were easy to ignore in my opinion, but I don’t know about others.

My first problem was the more noticeable one, which I’ve already said, the age gap. An 8 year age gap is a bit odd, it’s easy to ignore since they’re both legal and it’s only mentioned once. I just hate the idea of her being 10 years old, barely reaching double digits, while he was 18, already a legal adult.

My second problem was that they had a few scenes of miscommunication, which is also easy to ignore but it just irritates me that stuff could’ve been solved so much quicker.

This is where the spoilers kick in.

The first scene that I noticed it in was the scene after Olive had confessed that she had feelings for Adam to Malcom. So as you know, if you’ve read the book, Olive confides in Malcom after Anh announces that she’s “clearly in love with Adam” despite Olive being in a fake relationship with him (Of course Anh didn’t know that it was a fake relationship). After she had confessed it to Malcolm, on a Wednesday at 10am, Adam had been behind her and had heard the entire thing go down. Just to make it clear she never explicitly said that it was Adam she was referring to whenever he had overheard her. Right after Malcolm left Olive went on to lie to Adam, saying she was in love with somebody else which then led him to believe it was Jeremy, Anh’s boyfriend and Olive’s ex. Jeremy was basically the sole purpose they had started this fake dating scheme in the first place, so Anh could be with Jeremy without feeling guilty. All I’m gonna say about that scene is that everything could’ve been solved much more quicker if she had just confessed that she had feelings for him, especially after the disappoint on his face after she had not corrected him about her “feelings” for Jeremy.

The second scene I noticed it in was the scene after she had been assaulted by Tom. So, when it comes to this scene I am way more understanding about it. She didn’t want to upset Adam and ruin his project with Tom. I fully understand that and have come to accept it. I just didn’t like the fact that she had lied to him (again) about something so important to his life, seeing how Tom was his best friend. But, I love how the continuation of that problem ultimately led to another sweet interaction between herself and Holden. (Holden was literally the best character.) I’m glad that in the end she knew the right thing to do, despite if it would hurt Adam or not.

This is basically the entirety of my “review” for this book. I know it’s not much but I just wanted to get all of the pent up thoughts I had about this book out. It was a good read and I swear you’ll enjoy it if you like comedic romance stories.