#before I go into rambly mode
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𝐗𝐗𝐗𝐕𝐈𝐈. Birth of a thought made manifest in human flesh —Dáinsleif's origins—.
◜The Winged One's regret or remorse gave birth to a thought, and as he imagined the path that could have been taken, a new soul was born.◞
As a result of the war waged against the Second Who Came, Nibelung and the ensuing chaos with the leaking Forbidden Knowledge that had to be subdued lest the world was plunged into darkness, thus left with no chances for survival, Phanes' functions were ruined and could no longer use their absolute authority to suppress the original order of this world. In combination with his severely wounded state, the Usurper glimpsed into the wrongs of his deeds and the ones bound to come after if he were to be deteriorated further due to the influence of the Forbidden Knowledge, the loathing and resentments of the world or other forces that could take advantage of his weakened state.
He who loved his human creations more than anyone, and He who cursed the gods to come after to love humans saw himself mired in hypocrisy the moment his creations were at disadvantage the most and were kept in the highest regard no longer due to his own decisions' and that of his closest circle, who should follow his will. Thus in a moment of weakness and lucidity, his regret gave birth to a thought— to a what if. What if things were different, what if his initial desire continued without struggling against the vicissitudes and personal agendas, what if he was stronger to not let himself be corrupted to this point of apparent no return.
What if he could undo everything that made his sacred plans evil.
From these last thoughts was Dáinsleif born as a soul, nurtured in a seed in Irminsul's benevolent aura out of its kindness and will for the world to cease fighting against its own natural orders and to diminish the loathing and resentments of the world that the Primordial One has caused. One day of the countless moons this seed basked under the moonlight and Irminsul's might, he was born in the material world in Celestia as a human, a manifestation of the origins never known by others of Phanes' closest circle until divine's eyes fell upon him. Unrest was among them, yet only muted at the knowledge that they could do with him as they pleased. So repeating the cycle of a once heiress of Celestia that failed in her task to retrieve the Pearl of Genesis and believed herself to be the queen of the kingdom of darkness, Dáinsleif was sent there with the intent to erase his memories of any ties he could have to Celestia.
Thus he would have no connection with the divine, nor his actions would suppose betrayal to any— for it is them who betrayed them first, abandoned him to his fortune. Unbeknownst to them, he who they abandoned would be the one to silence the source of all sins in the deepest abyss and undo the wrongs that began with the greatest Usurper, as well as reweaving all threads of fate.
It would all begin in Khaenri'ah, where Dáinsleif has drifted with a mission he recalls no more, and where he would mature his views of the world, limited at the time as they may be. His love for humanity and pursuit to defend them limitless as the Primordial Sea from where all life is born, even if his personal beliefs about the laws set in the kingdom and its deeds may differ drastically from what it would be expected of anyone who arrives to the kingdom established along the roots of Irminsul.
#◟༺✧༻◞ glimpses in the past of a shattered spirit ┊headcanon.┊#don't perceive me#as I tie the knot tighter#of my the take I've been wanting to implement for Dain#for a while—#this is a great way to justify better#a few descriptive choices#as well as explain a few things#connected to his knowledge#one might think that his fight for humanity would be conditioned by this#and that could be right#but this is all on himself#as he could stray perfectly fine from this line of thinking#from which he was born#if he didn't agree with it#specially as someone who advocates that everyone#should be masters of their own fate#which includes himself#I'll continue to keep vague a few things#such as the big ? of whether he'd be a G.old case#in terms of how long he lived until the Cataclysm#for now this will do#before I go into rambly mode#props to Jace for giving me wings for this take#insecure as I was for even implementing it as part#of my portrayal of Dain 🥺
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Little Danny's Big Adventure
New idea.
Okay now hear me out.
-Pulls out AU idea cauldron and tosses stuff into it-
Let's put in some Ghost King/Prince Danny.... But also some deaged to toddlerhood Danny that gets yeeted into the DCverse!
Like imagine, tiny baby Danny with his tiny crown of ice floating above his head and his galaxy cape wrapped around him and uses it like a baby blanket. He didn't mean to fall into a different universe, a natural portal opened up and he was being a curious little thing! He didn't mean to trip and fall in during his nap time.
Nor was he expecting to fall into this realm during a rogue attack and knock out said rogue cause they were being a meanie and harming people and now Danny just wants his nap time cause he spent a lot of his tiny engery and he wants to find a nice spot.
Danny finds a place to crash, snuggling himself into his cape and the astronaut bear Danielle got him during her last visit that he takes everywhere since.
He's out like a light as the door to this safe house that belongs to one of the Bats opens up.
Meanwhile. In the Infinite Realms, Queen Regent Jazz is going into Mama Bear Jazz Mode trying to find her deaged brother, keeping the Realms in check, and is resisting the urge to put CW in time out Soup Time because he's being cyptided again about Danny whereabouts!!! UGH!
#danny phantom#danny fenton#crossover#dp x dc#blue rambles#danny phantom dc#writing ideas#random idea#dpxdc#jazz fenton#queen regent Jazz#king/prince Danny#deaged Danny#Clockwork mention#baby!danny#hes just a tiny little guy#with more powers in his pinky finger and the ability to maybe end worlds#but still tiny little guy#Danny fell into the DCverse during his naptime#could be any city but I do love Gotham and the Bats#anyways hes a bit cranky when he sees someone being mean and harming people so he helps#and then flys aways before someone can really stop him#and gets tired again so he crashes in someones safe house#who? up to anyone tbh#meanwhile Jazz is going Mama Bear mode#CW is playing with fire not telling Jazz where Danny is at tbh#he does likes tempting fate#Soup Time is timeout time#Jazz is regent while Danny is in toddlerhood
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↠ Tim & Lucy ↳ 2x10 - The Dark Side
#jesuis-assez edits: chenford season 2#jesuis-assez edits: chenford#jesuis-assez edits: chenford scenes 2x10#I really didn't want to gif a single frame of Caleb. But I did want to gif this scene. So sacrifices had to be made 🤣#Absolute INSANE behavior Tim. INSANE! and yet justified given how much of a piece of sh-- Caleb turned out to be. He had creepy vibes#from the get go. It's interesting how Tim said that Lucy hesitated with Caleb.#The only hesitancy (and frustration) I detect is this conversation taking place while Tim is there and Lucy being very aware of that.#And Tim at the end handing her the paper. Lucy observing how he's acting and how quickly he shifted into protective mode. Tim standing#there with a part of him not feeling right about this whole thing & later projecting that as Lucy being the one who didn't.#He was overwhelmed by his guilt and in such anguish. Just falling apart at the thought of losing her because he gave her advice#as a friend and not as her training officer. Something awful happening to someone else. To Lucy... collecting more guilt#and piling it on top of all the other times that happened. That someone suffered because of 'his actions'#Neither Tim or Lucy saw this sadistic monster coming. And Tim may not have suspected him...#But there was something about Caleb and that interaction that had Tim stepping into that role of the fierce protector.#And Tim isn't only emitting protective energy here...🟢 * Puts a green circle there and doesn't elaborate * Yaass queen give us nothing 🤣#The green circle of jealousy and Tim is standing inside of it.#But he's also coming across as distrustful of Caleb's intentions which is not alarming as they're in the midst of the chaos#surrounding a serial killer. It's rather expected to be that way. It's how Tim said he should've known. He should've suspected him.#He's a cop. And yet he started interrogating like a cop would & as if he were a suspect. Asking for a last name. What he does for a living.#He behaved in that way for a reason. So something definitely felt off but the need to be Lucy's friend in that moment#that he encouraged her to go out with him came before his instinct to be a cop or even her T.O .#In other words... He prioritized Lucy and what he thought she needed. He shifted the focus from the case onto her by#suggesting she focus on something else. And when she was taken... that focus on her became heightened by the gravity of the situation.#+ The EYE CONTACT. Tim & Lucy having their own private moment. The silent communication between them while Caleb rambles on#in the background about something unimportant. I have so much more to say but I've reached my tag limit 🤣*whispers with feeling* f**k..
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that one "do you think we're friends in every universe" Dan and Tray post I made AGES ago but space dogified.. rubs my hands together like a cartoon villain
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The drawing 👇👇 based on this one painting my friend sent me AGES ago to draw for a different au (mermal 🎉🐟) but uh. IT GOT TURNED INTO A TDM THING-
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also the original post I made
#DanTDM#DanTDM au#dr trayaurus#minecraft story mode#mcsm#Mcsm au#Mcsm: space dog#Unsure if I should tag jack since he's not like technically here but like that's his trident above them 😝#TH. THE ORIGINAL POST IS A YEAR OLD..#NO FUCKING WAY????#NAW..#I need to remake it I could do it so much better omg#With more fandoms too#I wanted to do tomodatchi life in it too but my wrists were killing me 😭😭#ANYWAY. au ramble time 😝#So. Drawing context! ☝️ Uhhhh SO BASICALLY#Trayaurus is very deep in denial about Dan#Sure. He found the goggles. He hasn't found Dan in six years of searching. Sure all signs point to him being dead#HOWEVER he's been searching for so long HES GOTTA FIND HIM SOON. RIGHT???? (no-)#So when he DOES get solid evidence that Dan was murdered he uh. Loses the plot a little#After having a massive argument with jack and Nurm over it he flees town and heads straight for the manor#And attempts to make the machine he used to revive grim again. But things don't go to plan#Because he's so frazzled and rushed it comes out quite sloppy. Plus he needs bones. And while Dan's bones ARE in the manor#So are a lot of zombie bones. He accidentally creates some freakish mindless bloodthirsty zombie that looks an awful lot like Dan...#Ofc it tried to kill him. But Tray is just so desperate to see Dan again that he ignores this and welcomes the creature with open arms#Before it could hurt him jack finds him and kills it though so he's good!! Tray is furious about this until Jack talks some sense into him#So yah 😝
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leans into microphone.
I don't listen to people that haven't played a new Kingdom Hearts game since 2006. Yes yes kh2 we all love it yes kh2fm is amazing yeah yeah we've all see kh2. Play more kh games, that is literally game number 3 in a series that's like 15 games ongoing. "It's confusing" it's just long as fuck so its a lot of information to take in and that's okay. People literally take so much time and care to explain the series and lore to people who are lost. Like just say you enjoy kh2's gameplay and move on, if you really cared about the series AS A SERIES you'd be paying attention to it as a whole. "Dream drop distance what a stupid title!!!" that is the LEAST stupid thing that has happened in this series. "It's on too many consoles" watch a cutscene movie. Read a wiki page! I own a Playstation TWO!!!!!!!!!! like I have nothing more recent other than my switch. Do you think I've played every game lmao??
Anyway stan kh mobile games I don't care if you don't like them its not a hot take by any stretch of the imagination to not like them. You should read my khux/dr plot summary actually <3
#im tired okay#the clowns found my kh twitter post#I dont hate kh2 I LOVE IT like everyone else. but there are more games.#that meme of the soldier getting attacked by all those knives while a kid sleeps in bed is me with the khux haters#I go on the internet and say 'please pay attention to kh plot especially khux' and I am DOGPILED#khux fans get behind me /j#every time im at a con and cosplaying khux you wouldnt BELIEVE the shit people say TO MY FACE#BEFORE ANYONE SAYS IT I WAS EXCLUSIVELY A F2P KHUX PLAYER!!!! I PLAYED DAY 1 ALL THE WAY TO THE END OF SERVICE TOTALLY FREE!!!!#I DO NOT GAMBLE!!!!!!! I WAS OVER LVL 500 AND I COULD RANK TOP 200 SOLO AND COLISEUM! I PLAYED EVERY SINGLE QUEST!#not proud mode tho admittedly that shit was hard#im rambling#khux#khdr
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Honestly, they should have given the Kumojacky treatment to Minoton's arc, or at least something similar
#rip Minoton bc he too was following the same pattern as the other two#that is Strong by Undergu Empire Standards- Nice by Undergu Empire Standards - HONORABLE BY UNDERGU EMPIRE STANDARDS#but came after Battamonda and the bugman put the morality bar soooo fucking low anyone had to go digging#and his arc felt like it got cut short#he was starting to get nervous and angry about losing so much. i think it'd have been fun to have an ep that really put him to the test#like finally having a chance at winning but in a way that'd be unfair. maybe one of them is missing. or sick#smth where if one was even a bit underhanded it'd be easy to do. it's so easy to be honorable when you're the strongest and#in a confident position#both Kabaton and Battamonda got broken down before being built up again and better for it. Minoton deserved it too methinks#what's your strength for. what's your honor worth. is it actually honorable to attack people just living their lives. much to think about#I do think the others were sending Ranborgs bc the Ranborgs are stronger than them but HE was sending them bc they're weaker than him#that being said. he should have thrown hands#and there were so many instances where he was attacking just bc he was petty about them having fun instead of also training hard#idk just in rambling mode and my wife already knows all that sjsjsjjsajs#rashi's rambles#hirogaru sky precure#minoton#something deeply wrong with him btw#saltiness aside I do think he's not used to feeling threatened and lacks some sort of self-preservation instincts bc of it#case on point: his conversation with the Kaiserin
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i really do appreciate laois doing things that are absolutely bonkers. Like i did have a thought wrt him going So Ham on the dog impression but it occurred to me thinking about a shapeshifter who can read your thoughts you really would have to Go All In, and while it is still presented as being comical (bc it is objectively funny to watch him get on all fours and bark like a dog while the camera's doing barrel rolls) it didn't feel like Just A Joke. This is unsaid, maybe it wouldn't be necessary, but i think it demonstrates the strength of laois's convictions. It's what makes him so good at what he does. he really does have that dog in him....
#fishes rambles#dungeon meshi#it esp made me think about w kitsune a lot of the legends about defeating them having to do w the fear of hunting dogs specifically#interfering w their magic which was neat#also wrt to him stimming before going into Dog Mode touched me really bc i remember so often b4 shame was hammered into me#about doing silly things like pretending to be an animal bc some aspect of how they moved or acted was soothing in some aspect? or somethin#i wanted to emulate bc i thought it was cool bc b4 years of karate i had extremely bad coordination and athleticism in general#and idk it was just so. it gave me some feelings.
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sigh. i need to be kissed on the mouth or i might start killing people
#just me rambling again#incredibly drunk rn sorry tumblr i somehow share more of my thoughts with you all when Under Influences#before i go full dog boy mode im sharing this#i need someone who wants to kiss me on the mouth soooooo bad#im such a beautiful boyfailure id be a fandom favorite#its been too long </3 i need some intrigue i need some spice to my life and also i need a smooch#the yearning has gone absolutely crazy the past few weeks#i love my friends so so so much and im sometimes filled with so much warmth from just their presences#however#i would really love to maybe have a lover of some sort as well. i would love anyone to be interested in me like that#been craving the sort of intimacy and also just the fun of romance and also just... smooching#sigh#ah well. there is homework to be done and errands and work to do. and in the present moment i just have to exist#you know how it is#time to go watch stimboards or dapg and probably have more peanut butter snack bc it's yummy and comfort food#and also bc doglike tendencies (again. you know how it is)
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Ok, so I'll go back to posting drawings soon, but I need to ramble about girls with short hair like??? What gives them the right to be so pretty???? And when someone has bags under their eyes, like REAL bags under their eyes. A tired person who is themselves and has short hair ohmygod I knew this was my type, but fuckkkk
Saw someone with short hair and bags under their eyes at the breakdancing olympics and I JUST FELL IMMEDIATELY. Saw this yuri manga that is called "The guy she was interested in wasn't a guy at all" and fell for Mitsuki, too 😭(That without counting the fact that all my girl crushes have been girls with short hair through my life). It's like I have this instant crush for girls with short hair that I can't help. It just looks so fashionable and great and so comfortable and makes them look so cool.
Help, I am having a huge gay panic rn 😔
#moth is bi#but girls with short hair has her going full lesbian mode#and chubby boys with what ppl call the bear body type also have me mesmerized#I once had a huge crush on one and I never knew I was attracted to it before I fell for him lol#He was such a sweetheart though so ofc I was going to fall for him eventually#ALSO GIRLS WITH DYED HAIR#AND PIERCINGS#Dont get me started with the black nail polish#or whatever thats called#fuckkk black nail polish is so hot???#I think I am going to read that whole manga because I need to see more of Mitsuki#She triggered my current gay panic after all lol#GOD IMAGINE KYLAR WITH SHORT HAIR#UGHHHHH NO WAY I AM SIMPING#Tomboy Whit would be so 🙏#AH FEM JORDAN WITH SHORT HAIR 🛐🛐🛐🛐#Helppppp#I needed to get this out of my system#because I can't ramble about this with anyone else at this hour#AUGHHH
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In your fic tbasawas was there anything specific that inspired you to do your specific stories and or ships?
Yes and no—
For the story itself:
Originally, I only had concepts for Aeiisy, a dark fic with a skeleton reader who is constantly having a Bad Time. But, as with most of my ideas, it got split into two different paths. (This is how I end up with most of my fic ideas btw) You might see a few similarities, or even direct reflections between a few of my works, and that’s because they are all directly or indirectly formed from a few of the same ideas, split into separate paths.
Like an au I guess???
Tbasawas was made as a direct counter to Aeiisy, so I wouldn’t pass away from angst and could have something sweet a fluffy to write whenever I got burnt out. (Ignoring the amount of angst that ended up in Tbasawas anyway… and the fluff that got put into Aeiisy…. Don’t look at me!!)
So Tbasawas was inspired by Aeiisy, and Aeiisy was inspired by the need for a skele reader, Monster Frisk, and an apocalypse fic. Not sure how any of that connects, but that’s how it went down.
Tbasawas is a soft apocalypse, if that’s even a thing. Their changes aren’t gory and the world isn’t riddled with war and violence. Just people treated like lost puppies in a cozy adoption center waiting for their ‘forever home’. For the most part.
I take a lot of inspiration directly from animal adoption processes. The whole shebang. Paperwork, wait time, vetting, inspections, background checks, introductions, acclimation— Hell, even the Assigned Nurse can be compared to a Foster. The Mimic Monitors are essentially juiced up microchips.
I’m pretty sure I even used a template for the adoption of a dog from a serious breeder for the letter that Abbee gives Nerma to explain to process. And the email Edge receives  in chapter one.
There’s a lot of themes in Tbasawas going on. Another one is the grieving process, as hinted at in the title of the first chapter. Arc one: Shock.
I’m using this version of the grieving process in particular:
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I’m not sure how strictly I’ll follow it, but it’s definitely there in the background, at the very least.
As for inspiration for the relationships:
It’s all kinda based around these themes and how I think the characters would be changed by them.
I’ve changed these characters a lot. Maybe not much physically for most,(that you can see.. wink wonk) but I’ve taken a lot of liberty with their stories and backgrounds. And in the tags for Tbasawas, this universe is listed under post neutral route… not pacifist. Do with that information what you will.
Based on these changes, I think about how they might act. What makes the most sense. What they feel, what kind of person would they feel most comfortable around and what kind would they hate? Do they have insecurities? Are there any fears that they might be judged? Would that stop them from getting close to specific skeletons in the pack? *cough* Sparrow *cough*
Are they jealous or possessive? Holding on to the one good thing that’s happened to them and waiting for the other show to drop?? Even if it hinders the others ability to seek out relationships with others of the pack??? *cough* Red *cough*
I kinda just zone out and smash dolls together in my mind until I get something I like. Not all that cool of a process, but it’s what works for me.
Speaking of! Let’s use Red and Sparrow as an example!!!
*grabs my mental dolls of Red and Sparrow in my hands and smacks them together*
*loud incorrect buzzer sound*
Yep. Knew that would happen. See— Red is chill around the pack, but there’s not a lot of… feelings??? He has this disconnect inside him, whether from his LV, his trauma, or if that’s simply just how he handles his emotions, I’m not sure.
There’s this wall that he has up. He cares for the pack, and for his brother, of course he does! He’d kill for them. That was never in question. He’s just… distant. The only one who can really, really get close is Comet. And that’s mainly because they’re so similar it hurts. They’re in the same, sinking boat. Drifting out in the middle of the ocean as they keep hammering in nails in hopes they won’t drown.
Red is heavily complex, and no one knows just how to solve him and tell him to stop making so many damn holes in his boat before it’s unrepairable.
He’s smoke and mirrors with knives that will cut you if you take a wrong step.
Sparrow, is also withdrawn. But for very different reasons.
He’s not shy, per say— but he’s very conscious how he looks and how he’s perceived. He knows that he’s not as handsome as he once was (lies), he knows that he looks frightening, even to other Monsters.
His self esteem is very low, it’s been getting better thanks to his pack, but it’s still not great. He hides a lot of things about himself, whether out of shame or for the perceived benefit of the other person is a 50/50 at any given moment.
His status as a sigma doesn’t help. There are already enough stigmas about people like him and Star, if Sparrow can’t do what’s expected of him— if he falls into stereotypes—
…he doesn’t like to think about it.
He’s not as able bodied anymore, and his senses are both dulled and heightened to uncomfortable degrees. He needs to be able to trust the people around him. He needs to know that they won’t think lower of him for his weakness. He needs to know that he can depend on them and they won’t just up and leave.
Red has given no indication that he is capable of providing any of those assurances. He has in fact proven quite the opposite.
At this point in time, Red and Sparrow could never be in a relationship. Sparrow would likely end up cut on Red’s knives and shattered glass, and Red would keep hammering more fucking nails into his boat. Unaware that it’s the very thing that keeps brining in more water.
Augh. So long story short: insanity.
The idea for the story popped in my head and then I stared at characters until the imploded in my brain like a super nova and then they kept forming fun new galaxies for me to explore.
I guess it’s my characters that give me inspiration. I just wanna slap my dolls together and see wtf happens, I have no idea where I’m going and I’m equally as surprised as you are at every chapter🗿🗿🗿
I just wanna see Edge be soft and have his little found family, and to feel like he’s allowed to exist in the world despite his sins.
I wanna see Grim be an absolute menace and Get Bitches, because he loves his idiots and just wants to live life at his laziest.
I wanna see Bear put a ring on as many hoes as he likes and get to be happy and smug and purr as he crushes them (lovingly) in his nest.
I wanna see Stretch be soft and fuss about his mates and then punish them for their stupidity with various pranks.
I wanna see Star huff and lovingly bully his mates into being kind to them selves, forcing them to take it easy or face the wrath of Self Care days.
I wanna see Comet get yoinked out of his tiny shell and actually mean it when he smiles his little bastard smiles, and to be able to reach out and form other relationships within the pack.
I wanna see Black get his ass Wooed and his icy rain bloom into spring showers because he feels loved and able to be soft and love in turn.
I wanna see Blue live his life to the fullest and prioritize his own feelings sometimes and remember that it’s okay to want things.
I wanna see Sparrow have each and every one of his boo boos kissed and told that he’s handsome and I want him to accept it and be confident.
And I wanna see Red get a happy ending. I want to see his sharp edges, both the ones facing inside and out, to get smoothed out. I wanna see this bastard get soft and mushy. I’m gonna turn his ass into a grumpy marshmallow just you wait.
And of course, I want to see Nerma be the spark that gets this thing moving.
I’m just a simp…. That is all 😔
#rabid rambles#I’m teally putting the rabid into rambling#undertale#sans#papyrus#augh#answered asks#sipping milk#I can not stay on topic for the life of me#I didn’t have any ideas for specific ships when I first started#I just became progressively more and more Deranged#I think my favorites would have to be Bear X Black. Red X Comet. and Grim X literally every one#I just Need them all to kiss okay I’m normal I swear#I don’t know whit inspires besides sheer Brain Rot#tbasawas#maybe I should come up with ship names lmao#Edge and Blue are also very sweet together#I need them all to be happy otherwise I will Die#I have SO many plot points that I’m excited to get to#so much foreshadowing that I want to pay off#auuuggooowwwwhhhhhuuuueeee#somebody put me Down before I spread my disease#as always!! thanks for the ask and always feel free to send more whenever you have a question :3 as you can see I am very ill and will go#sicko mode when given the chance#call me the yappster grandmaster the way I let loose
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Another thing about Mary is that she's one of the few people who is "enjoying" the Termina festival, to an extent.
Partially because the horrors are a bit too beyond her comprehension, so there's a handful of things she just doesn't understand and so tries to find a way around/keep going about whatever she's doing at the moment. But mainly because the situation they've been thrown in makes it so that the people around her aren't actively ignoring her existence or avoiding her out of seeing her as a filthy thing. She is being seen and treated like a person, just like the other contestants, so as terrible and bleak as things may get she at least has that fact to look at and feel happy to have experienced.
She got to meet and talk with a bunch of people she wouldn't have otherwise, go around with them and help when needed, some even went as far as actually caring for her through the time they spend in termina. Sucks that it takes pretty much the miniature apocalypse for her to recieve this kind of treatment.
#just to be clear. none of the other contestants mistreated Mary before termina#she didn't know any of them before#some are assholes tho. but most are either chill or friendly to her so she's having fun#as much fun as a sane person can have amidst all this#she's kinda like Aki in csm pt1 saying his life finally got kinda fun despite all the chaos. hardship and trauma he's gone through#not that Mary is the only person having fun in the festival. i mean. John loves it#but he's the devoted rher follower that's basically lost his mind to grief and is on full devotee mode#to the point he's going around killing the other contestants to win the festival and be face to face with his god#so yeah. not a fair comparison here#Matyas also growns to enjoy it if he hangs around John a lot because they grown closer#and so his delusions feed Matyas's and they make eachother worse#hyena ramblings#termina 1st round#termina oc#feat and hunger oc#Mary ann
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19, 30, 39 for the handwriting ask game wahooo !!!
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19) AAAAaaa so hard to choose fave songs…! but recently I’ve been listening to Bunny Girl a fair bit, started humming my clematis today so went to listen to that as well…Oh wait fave songs uhh RGU op is lovelyyy! also the song I want to be your lover appears in my mind a lot…wait also song I found on bilibili that does an ouchie to me is (mainly the first part) are you lost AAAAAA if I keep going I am going to fill 10 pages (of these short pages) but uhhhh a doll of lapis and erica’s sorrow and also karen’s cleanup are good! essentially there are too many nice silly songs and I am just really bad at making up my mind >:( (I think I will have links to the YT of these)
30) Thank youuu for sending in a silly ask >_O (It looks a lil goofy but its okay!) I think because of the pens I am using my handwriting looks slightly “nicer(?)” but oh well! I might have to add a transcript because my handwriting is still kinda messy :3 (aaa all my silly written faces are messed up in this page :c)
39) I have an egregious amount of stationary supplies and also really want to go back into sewing a bit! aaa or spending time making those silly friendship bracelets (would be silly to make some based on mutuals colors) Oh and also learning how to sew and embroider enough to make silly cotton dolls :ccc (so many things I wanna do yet so many horrors yet still)
#silly rambles#for i want to be your lover its specifically raon cover but I forgot to write it lol but I still put the cover’s link#also to be fair I used to loop that song a lot a lot so makes sense it would sometimes start playing in my mind#aaaa i didnt even get to mentioning that one cover of carnivorous plant aaaaa#i really like the mao sasagawa cover of carnivorous plant i listened to it a lot (and also it doesn’t have the ringing of the original which#i cant always handle/enjoy)#wait wait woswald is nice tooo aaaaaa#i’ve found a lot of songs on bilibili that aren’t from it#AAAAA like i’m falling in love with my teacher WHICH AAAAA does not need to be as nice as it is#wait also GURU and bereavement#those also bc (idv stuff) bilibili I found and quite like#also on revolutionary girl utena its not just the opening but that was foremost in my mind#oh also in finding the en names for the last two songs I wrote down (I genuinely didn’t know before hand bc I got them va yt recommendation#and had them in a playlist to find them) I realized dongdang covered both of them which is lovely#will be adding those covers into my current playlist#i really hope the links work pls pls pls plssss#also is this indicative of how j-music comprises of most of what I listen to#oh also as much as my brain thinks in silly words I cannot spell/handwrite most of them so I did check to make sure I got some of those corr#correct lololo#AAAA I FINALLY FINISHED THE TRANSCRIPT AAAAAAAA#i’m so eepy I wanna go sleer mode…Zzzz
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sorry thinking about minazuki again.
me and the guy who lives in my brain and was probably born from my deep seated repressed understanding that my dad was abusing me and the survival instincts i had beaten out of me in order to become a better human weapon. there to protect me because i can't understand how to protect myself. who is also technically a potential harbinger of the doom of all mankind if he ever really got going but he would never do that to me specifically (FUCK THE REST OF YOU)
vs [deeper voice that's still clearly from the same vocal cords but with a completely different cadence and intonation] me and the mentally ill traumatized human i awakened within who i do my best to protect and care for with my limited understanding of how to do so. who can and has hurt me worse than anyone, to the point that my ingame title references that injury. but to hurt me is to hurt himself, and i would still do anything for him. so no matter what, i shoulder any burden i can manage for him. even to a fault. even to a breaking point.
we rely on each other. two halves of a whole. and yet we cannot admit that we share a deeper bond than many could imagine. it didn't even come to mind. someone else had to point it out. we meant the world to each other while never knowing how to articulate it.
and our persona who is a weird owl.
#this isn't a shipping post don't tag it as that ill bite you#sorry needed to get that out of the way. i could not articulate the relationship they have it's not a word that exists#but please allow me to live my life and keep it platonic on my posts. thanks.#persona#sorry this is me aimlessly rambling but i think a lot about post-arena stuff and about having to adjust when you're the remaining piece of#what was once two halves of a whole#i think tsukuyomi as sho knows him is to some extent minazuki in a new mode of being#but it's never going to be the same as it was before. and even with how his outlook shifted during the true ending#i think he'd still always be a little alert for that missing voice in his head
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I need to draw my rook bc I actually do have some ideas for them I just. Have NOT been in a creating mood idk I'm so tired... Aoughgggh
#crow rambles#i want to write and i want to draw and i want to do a million things and i am doing NONE of them...#insane... crazy even...#like. i have several fic ideas i wanna write (nothing new there) but i am not writing them#i. well i dont have any art ideas now but i WANNA draw but ohh. hard :(#i think i may be having a little creative burnout... give me like four days ill be back on my game#i can never stay away from art for too long. i get itchy if i dont draw for a few days#longest ive went without drawing in the past like. decade. has been a week and that was when i got covid#my ass can NOT put the pencil down#i do want to get some of my rook ideas into fic bc i think it may help me flesh them out a little bit#while i do have a lot of criticisms of dav i kinda wanna stop focusing on them so much#bc i KNOW ive been posting about them alot on here#and while i don't think the game SHOULDNT be criticized (it definitely should) i dont want to be solely negative on it#bc i actually did have fun playing it#and i want to reflect it in my posts lmao#however. i love bitching. i am so good at bitching#its a competitive sport and im winning. top tier bitcher thats me#idk i should probably replay the game bc its always easier to make a protagonist for a dragon age game once you know the plot#but also i want to finish my dao replay... and replay da2... and finish my dai replay i never finished lmao#im at the landsmeet in dao so it shouldnt be much longer. i plan on skipping the golems dlc this go round bc i dont really like it and it#doesnt add very much to the plot imo. everytime i play it i get pissy over the harvester. fucking AWFUL boss#tried killing it on hard mode. once. i am never doing that shit again i HATEEEE that stupid thing#<- by landsmeet i meant i am doing the denerim quests right before the landsmeet. im just before the whole 'anora got locked up' thing#am NOT looking forward to the alienage... idk i really want go get to witch hunt 😭😭
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haven't drawn this stupid brain parasite in a while now have i feat. v basic pinterest color palette since they make my brain give happy chemicals
#im v easily amused#there'll prolly be more palette ethan doodles because funny lil guy + i have a massive board im just lazy lmao#also other ops maybe probably unless i get bored of the thin lineart but for now it fucks and messyness goes brrrr#plus it's quick this took like an hour [[probably a bad metric given how often i draw ethan it's just muscle memory atp]]#anywho before i go full ramble mode#my art#arknights#arknights fanart#ethan arknights
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imma go for the community college we got here n find some online courses to take for 2 years so i can earn an associates degree in smthn (thinking about in fine arts)!! & maybe later down the line i can look into getting a bachelor's degree in something!
#general post#loaf rambles#I've always preferred taking online classes vs going in-person#(i work best w/ my own space)#i remembered going full online mode for the 2nd half of my junior year#before realizing i needed to be fully on-campus senior year 2016 back in the hellscape#even if i have to go on-campus for some things?? i dont mind it#and im surprised im at a point in life mentally/emotionally where i can even say that /pos
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