#been watching star wars since i was a toddler

[bleakbluejay]

never recoiled so hard in my life than the first time i read a fic where they had din djarin say "fuck"

[rosiesramblings]

Wound Up

Fandom: Stranger Things

WC: 1.3k

A/N: Hello! Long time no fic! I am here at literally the last possible second with a Squealing Santa fic for @girltickles who requested Stranger Things with Steddie or Steve and Robin - I couldn't pick so I kind of did both. Happy holidays! I hope you enjoy! @squealing-santa

Steve had been wound up tighter than one of Eddie’s guitar strings all day. Eddie had brushed it off as nerves at first - he and Steve hadn’t been dating that long, after all, and they had made plans to spend the whole day together. Eddie himself was a little anxious-excited. But the fourth time Steve shivered whenever Eddie got close, it was obvious to Eddie that something was up. So he waited, and he watched.

Steve’s hand seemed to be rubbing at the back of his neck every few minutes. He jumped when Eddie said his name, and blushed when Eddie raised an eyebrow at Steve’s antics. If Eddie didn’t know any better, he would say a toddler had inhabited Steve’s consciousness with how squirmy the guy was.

Finally, in the middle of the third Star Wars movie, when Eddie placed a hand on Steve’s knee only for Steve to leap up from the couch like he’d been shocked, Eddie decided enough was enough.

“Ok, Stevie, what the hell is going on with you today?” Eddie asked.

Steve blushed a deep red. “Nothing - I’m fine.”

Eddie didn’t dignify that with a response. He raised an eyebrow.

All at once, Steve seemed to deflate. He heaved a sigh. “Is it ok if Robin comes over?”

Eddie furrowed his brow even as he nodded. “Yeah, of course. Is this some kind of Russian interrogation trauma-bond thing?”

If possible, Steve blushed even deeper. “No, no it’s nothing like that. It’s just - it’ll be easier to explain once she gets here.”

With that, Steve slunk into the kitchen, and Eddie heard Steve dial the phone and speak in low tones before hanging up a few moments later.

Still avoiding eye contact, Steve made his way back into the living room to where Eddie was seated. “She said she was going to bike over,” he muttered.

“Well, let’s hope her balance on two wheels is better than her balance on two feet,” Eddie mused with a smile.

Steve snorted. “It isn’t. It definitely isn’t.”

Eddie played the movie, and the two watched quietly while they waited for Robin to arrive.

Arrive she did, about twenty minutes later, letting herself in with a loud, “Steve, do you have any bandaids I can borrow? Wait, who am I talking to, of course you have bandaids.”

Steve shook his head, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Why do you need bandaids?”

“I may or may not have gotten into a brief altercation with Petunia.”

Eddie looked at Steve. “Who’s Petunia?”

“Her bike,” Steve said as Robin walked into the living room.

A quick scan of her person assured Eddie that nothing was broken, just a scraped elbow that was sluggishly bleeding onto Steve’s parents’ hardwood floors.

Robin stopped in the middle of the room, squinting at Steve with a critical eye. Steve noticeably held himself still under her gaze, but couldn’t hold back a shiver that was nearly imperceptible. Robin saw it, though, and her eyes practically lit up with mischief.

“Steven Elizabeth Harrington, did you really have me bike all the way here for this? When there is a metalhead right there who I’m sure would be more than happy to provide what you need?”

Steve hid his face in his hands. “That’s so not my name. And I - I couldn’t just ask him!”

Taking advantage of Steve’s closed eyes, Robin stalked forward and threw herself atop Steve’s lap. “Well, I hope you know that since I biked all the way here, I’m not stopping until I’m satisfied.”

Eddie balked at that - he knew Robin was gay, Steve knew Robin was gay, and yet - no, there’s no way. Eddie knew he was missing a piece of the puzzle. He just couldn’t figure out what.

At Robin’s words, however, Steve let out a high-pitched whine. Eddie blinked. He’d never heard Steve make such a noise.

“Don’t give me that,” Robin teased. “If you wanted someone nice, you should have asked Eddie.”

“Um, asked Eddie what?” Eddie piped up.

The look Robin gave him was pure delight. “Asked Eddie to tickle him,” she said, and immediately dug her long fingers deep into Steve’s underarms. 

Steve gave a shout of laughter before melting back into the couch, a tension that he had been carrying all day dropping from his shoulders. His arms pressed to his sides, but from the volume of his laughter, Eddie would guess that they provided minimal protection.

Robin cooed at her platonic soulmate. “This is what you wanted, isn’t it? Just wanted to giggle for a little while?”

Steve threw his head back, “Ihihihihi - Ihihihihi don’t gihihihihiggle.”

Eddie snorted.

Robin gave a smirk. “Oh yeah? What happens if I get riiiiiiight here?” She drew her hands away from Steve’s underarms and attacked his tummy instead. Instantly, bubbly giggles filled the room as Robin scribbled over his ticklish spots, pausing momentarily to ruck Steve’s shirt up around his ribs. His giggles rose in pitch when Robin spidered over bare skin.

“Oh my god,” Eddie smiled to himself, but Robin heard him.

She beamed. “I know right! Isn’t this the best stress reliever?” She let one hand snake around to pinch at Steve’s side, resulting in a snort. “Honestly, Steve, I don’t know why you didn’t ask Eddie.”

“Ihihihihihi juhuhust couldn’t!” Steve cried out, twisting his torso in vain to get away from Robin’s evil fingers.

“Sure you could! I’ll help. Repeat after me: Eddie Munson, light of my life, moon to my stars, will you please tickle me until I forget my own name?”

Steve wailed at that, apples of his cheeks redoubling their blush. Eddie melted at the sight.

Just as suddenly as she started, Robin stopped her assault. Steve panted for breath between giggles as he blinked up at her in confusion.

“I’m waiting, Steve,” Robin sing-songed. She gently rested one hand on Steve’s hip and the other on his opposite thigh. “I’m not going to tickle you anymore until you ask Eddie to help.”

Steve’s mouth dropped open, betrayal written in the scrunch of his forehead. “Robbie,” he whined, throwing a hand up over his eyes.

“Yes?” she asked.

“Don’t make me say it.”

“But you’re so cute when you ask to be wrecked.”

“Oh my god.”

“C’mon, Stevie,” Eddie cajoled, delighted to join in the teasing. “You’ve fought monsters before. One sentence. How hard can it be?”

Steve squirmed beneath Robin’s hands, but she held firm, not a squeeze or scribble in sight.

Steve pouted. Then he sighed. Then he asked, “Eddie… would you please… would you please t-tickle me?”

As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Robin dug in with a vengeance, and Eddie leapt up to join her. Steve screamed with laughter as four hands descended on his body instead of two, electricity zinging through him as his friend and boyfriend grinned.

“SHIHIHIHIHIHIT! IHIHIT’S SOHOHOHOHO BAHAHAHAHAHAD,” Steve cackled, his arms coming down to unsuccessfully push at his attackers.

“Aw, but you asked for this, sweetheart,” Eddie teased, spidering his guitarist’s fingers over Steve’s rib cage. As Robin continued her devastating assault on his thighs.

“PLEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEASE,” Steve choked out, tears streaming down his face. Before long, his laughter went silent, and Robin and Eddie took that as their cue to back off. Robin swung herself down into the seat next to Steve’s and Eddie pulled Steve’s head into his lap, carding through his hair as Steve came back down to earth.

Steve’s giggles slowly petered out, and Eddie smiled down at his adorable boyfriend, who had turned to hide his face in Eddie’s tummy. That was fine with Eddie. Steve could stay there as long as he wanted.

It was Robin who spoke next. “Ok, now that that’s over, can I please have a bandaid now? I think I bled all over your couch.”

Steve just laughed.

[mioyeo]

Watch your back : chapter 4

Once you don’t value what you have someone else learns how to take care of what used to be yours

Synopsis : 8 men supposed to give her all the love they promised end up leaving her behind without a valid reason

Pairing : girlfriend Reader x PolyAteez !

Warnings : this chapter contains mentions of, reader ignoring Seonghwa for weeks , deep talk , arguing with Rin , flashbacks etc Please reminding me if I forgot something

Tag list : @legbouk , @scarfac3 , @m4rsluv , @hcyaa , @jackinmyarea , @layzfeelit , @loverlele , @mulletjoonsupremacy , @veneziamadness , @belle643 , @gugggu6gvai , @atinytinaa , @voidcupidz , @atinyreads , @baguette-atiny , @parkthothwa8 ,

This series is going to be posted together with the Psychiatric series, which means one chapter after another

Word count : 1,5k

She woke up tiredly going into the bathroom leaving her tidy bed behind

It's been some weeks since the incident , she stopped caring for anything else

It was only school , home , work and sleep in , to the point it got concerning for him

The quietness was starting to bother Seonghwa he at least expected for her to spare him a glance but nothing, neither did she talk to him or anything not even a single interaction

The only thing she smiled about was when she watched baking videos , was with the others or texted her new friend

Who felt bad seeing her down when they went to the cinema , she fell asleep there not even paying attention to him at all

Hey look the best part their about to-

There she was asleep with her head on his shoulder looking like a toddler who just had started it's nap time

She put on a big sweater that belonged to Seonghwa and some of his nike pants , despite the rage she felt and heart break she kept these pair of clothes it was the only thing she felt comfortable with from him at the moment

The girl went down into the kitchen and made herself some cereal before sitting down on the floor in  the living room

It was quiet as she enjoyed the alone time since everyone was asleep obviously since it was 6am

She went on her gallery and scrolled through the pictures and stumbled on her Seonghwa albums she somehow didn't want to get rid off

Pictures

She chuckled at the last one remembering that day as if it was yesterday

Can't I get any ? Why not I'm the one paying

Because it will take us a lot of time to stand in line  and our train will arrive soon

But we can catch the other one

Seonghwa my feet are sore I want to go home and finally sleep

Baby please I'll be sad if I don't get that Star Wars lightsaber , I really need it

Seonghwa please I- you owe me a feet massage, and now we have to look for a hotel or something because that was our last train

Thank you ! Come on let's go before it's gone

Both walked back to the toys shop where a huge line of adults with their kids where

Seonghwa look at the line it's so long

But baby it's going to be worth it just wait

They stood in line for like a hour and half , Seonghwa ended up fighting with a kid that wanted the same color as he wanted

I was in line first so I get the purple one

But sir your to old to like these stuff and I'm a kid who's still growing up

I don't care if your a kid I was here first

Daddy he doesn't want to give me the purple lightsaber it's rare and I want it !

Yeah exactly it's rare that's why I deserve it after waiting for hours in line

The kid kicked him on his leg hard grabbing the lightsaber and ran away to the cashier where his parents payed for it

Hey that was my lightsaber!

His lips started to tremble from the pain and that his purple lightsaber had been taken away

Seonghwa let's go it's gone already

She grabbed his hand leaving with him out the store as he waddled behind her like a child who's just had the worst day of its life

Baby please it's just a toy

It's not just a toy ! It's a rare purple lightsaber

He leaned on a pole crossing his arms looking away with his black hair slightly covering his eyes making him look a lot cuter than he already was in her eyes

Seonghwa baby please cheer up I'll see if I can find you another one I'll do anything for it

He looked to the side allowing her to  snap a quick picture

Really? , you better not play with me

I promise baby don't worry

She pulled his mask down and kissed him making him smile and hold her

Thank you love

She smiled and scrolled through other pictures each one telling its own story in her mind , she looked at her wallpaper it was a cute picture he took with one of the boys

Wallpaper

Placing her phone beside her she continued to eat and watched a random show on Netflix

" Why are you awake at this hour "

Jongho walked towards her as she sat there eating unbothered

" I couldn't sleep anymore "

He sighed sitting down next to her and kissed her forehead

" You guys need to fix it soon "

" If you came here because of this you just wasted your time "

She placed her finished bowl on the table and laid her head down on his lap

" Honestly, you both are being immature just talk to each other and see where it goes "

" Listen to me I don't want to make a move he hurt me by saying that , he needs to apologize "

" And you don't think you've hurt him with doing what you did and saying what you said?"

He rubbed her cheek

" I don't think so ,  he said it first "

" Come on baby think about it just talk to each other and you'll be fine again "

He stood up and went back to his room not before stopping somewhere else

She sighed and drew her attention back to the television , but her phone soon started ringing

Incoming call from " Tall prince "

Ah Y/n~~ are you awake ?

He yawned into the phone making her chuckle

Mhm I woke up hours ago why are you calling me this early in the morning?

I missed my strawberry besides I wanted to take you on a morning jog you in ?

Are you for real? it’s 6am

Ay just get ready I'll buy you breakfast too

I just ate cereal what else do you offer

I'll get us a nice waffle breakfast mhm ?

Ok I'll get ready , is Taeyang coming?

I show you my friends once and your already heads over heals , kidding he's asleep I don't think it will be the best idea to wake him now or he'll start nagging

He laughed quietly and smiled as she let out a sad sigh

I'll tell him to come next time don't be sad

You better , you know how much I enjoy jogging with him

I know I know now get ready so we can meet at your doorstep

They both said goodbye and hung up

She got up and went inside her room to change into her sports bra and some track pants , despite it being chilly outside she was going to warm up eventually from the jogging

" Don't you feel ashamed of yourself for going behind their backs with another guy ? "

Rin stood in front of her with showing her phone with the wallpaper on display

" Why are you going through my phone for ? , and he's just a friend of mine "

She tried snatching her phone back but failed

"Should I call San again , even better Yeosang ? I'm pretty sure they would be pissed "

The girl chuckled raising her voice on purpose

" I'm not a child to be controlled , I'm allowed to have friends it's not like I'm dating him or anything we are just friends "

" Yeah "friends" don't really save each other as Tall Prince on their phones "

" I don't know what type of mentality you have but friends do that , maybe you just don't have any of them that's why your acting up "

She approached the slight taller girl trying to snatch her phone back but again to no use

" Maybe I'll just call Yeosang right now and see what he'll think about you seeing other guys "

" I don't care about his opinion either his or San's , I may love them but I make my own decisions on who I want to be friends with "

She took her phone back before putting it inside the pocket of her pants

" I'd be surprised why Seonghwa said what he said last time but I'm not , I mean your indeed boring and less attractive  "

Y/n chuckled looking at the girl

" Is that what you care about ? being attractive and entertaining ? look the one who's boring is Seonghwa and he isn't that entertaining either but I did not choose to love him because of these little perfections I wanted to love him because of what he presented me and that being his true charms neither of them being attractiveness or entertainment"

" Well that's what you think- "

" I've dated them for like 4 years  while you are just on your first year with them , I know I'm starting to get boring no wonder they started dating you without letting me know which is ok because I'm not holding them back ”

Y/n grabbed one of her tracksuit jackets and went down the hall taking her keys  before finally exiting the house

Someone watched her from above out their window how she smiled brightly before hugging the boy that had been waiting for her a while now to come out so they could go jog

" What took you so long to come out "

" I'm sorry I just fell asleep "

She smiled telling him something else before they started jogging away from the apartment

[superluigiglitchy]

Some more stuff on my "Meggy gets raised by Mario and Luigi" au that I still haven't figured out the name of

Because of her being present Mario is considerably less chaotic and less of an asshole when he gets a face full of meme energy from the guardian pod but still pretty chaotic and stupid (basically a himbo)

This also has me making up dumb lore and I can't help but stuff @duckapus Splatoon ocs into Splatoon related aus so Paige basically runs away from home a lot sooner and ends up running into a disguised Callie and Marie upon arriving into Inkopolis after sneaking onto a metro train at the tender age of 10 whilst on the hunt for their missing older sister, Meggy whom was always talked about in hushed voices by their parents

Obviously this leads to Paige getting taking in by the Cuttlefishes

Yes this does in fact have the Cuttlefishes desperately hide the fact their essentially secret agents in increasingly more ridiculous ways on to lead to Paige following them sneakily into the manhole and finding out themselves cause why not

Mario and Luigi as I said decided to take a vacation to Inkadia with Meggy in order to learn more about her and her culture, this takes place when she's like 8 and during this she also meets Sam, Heavy and Kenji and ends up hitting off with them instantly whilst Luigi and Mario were discussing with a CPS member on how to care for a cephalopod child they were causing mayhem and chaos as toddlers do, go figure

Also during this trip the Superstar Siblings decide to watch and ongoing Turf War match and watch the Splatfest Champion Wren tear up the competition and little Meggy is instantly star strucked, silently slipping through the safety bars of the stands while Luigi and Mario were distracted to rush over to the champ himself when the bros. Found out they immediately had a heart attack and end up thanking Wren after he saved Meggy from being indirectly splatted

As a direct effect of Mario not being stupid, Peach is more tolerable of his shenanigans and not much of a prissy bitch so the Anime Ban doesn't happen however this does lead to a different arc

The Anime Cases Arc

In which Tari ends up put into a lead role and has to figure out a strange mystery in Inkopolis where dozens upon dozens of inklings have been disappearing over the last few weeks and ends up helping a Koopa Troopa named Detective Koopric and his adopted mouser daughter Daisybelle or Belle for short in solving this case after both Kenji, Sam and Heavy telk her they havent seen her in awhike and thought she was just hanging out with the glitchy gang (which was obviously not the case considering the fact the reason Tari asked about Meggy was because Mario worryingly asked her to help them find the missing inkling since she didn't come home on time) which obviously leads to some... Must justified panic

Not only that but Axol seems to be missing as well, which is understandably suspicious considering it lining up with the beginning of the disappearances

The events of the rest of the arc mimic that of the anime arc only with one difference

Desti doesn't die but is instead heavily crippled no thanks to Sephiroth piercing an area of nerves that mimic the spine leaving her in a coma, and even if she does its likely she'll never be able to walk normally again not with the state her nerves were left in, she'll need to use crutches for the rest of her life or a wheelchair even

Meggy now human (and recently reunited with the sibling she never knew she had, boy that was a reunion that's for sure) is extremely guilty over the state her friend has been left decides to fulfill her promise she made with the octoling

Win the Turf War Tournament

[formulapookie]

get to know me game

thanks @yeastinfectionvale for tagging me <3

do you make your bed? not always, I don't get why it is so important to do, I'm just going to sleep in it again and ruin it again...

what's your job? I occasionally work as a secretary for my cousin's company and I am a english and french tutor for middle/high schoolers

if you could go back to school, would you? MMMMMMMMMH I don't want to say NO because for the people I would but god go through all that again? nah, I'm good at Uni

can you parallel park? yass

do you think aliens are real? yes why wouldn't they? I mean the Universe is so big it can't not have other developed organisms

can you drive a manual car? ofc but I also enjoy driving my dad's automatic one (but just on the highway becasue it goes faster and it's easier to control

guilty pleasure? Pizza, trashy canale 5 programs and lasagna

tattoos? not currently but want to get at least three

favourite colour? granata. It's similar to bordeaux but it's specifically my football team's colour. and also indigo for some reason

favourite type of music? I space from 70s/80s/90s rock to 2000s pop songs to SOME rap songs

do you like puzzles? since I was a toddler, always loved to do them, I have one Star Wars puzzle framed since I was 10

any phobias? bees, hornets and wasps. and also geese. THEY'RE FUCKING SCARY

childhood sport? always has been and always will be Karate. I may have had my ups and sowns and it caused not little problem sto my health (physical and mental) but it's MY sport and I will love it for ever.

do you talk to yourself? yeah, especially when studying or trying to write things, it's super useful to me. But I also do it for fun, I imagine being interviewed.

tea or coffee? coffe. I'm italian what kind of question is that. Caffè espresso SENZA ZUCCHERO.

what was the first thing you wanted to be when you grew up? an interpreter for the UNO, or alternatively a sports journalist (i son't know for the love of god how I can want two completely different things)

what movies do you adore? uuuush long list. Star Wars franchise (I'm sorry yeah I exclude the sequels they didn't convince me) Indiana Jones and the Lost Arch Hunger games: Catching fire Fight Club (watch it) The Devil wears Prada Green Mile Jurassic Park (THE FIRST ONE, THE REAL ONE, THE ONLY ONE IN MY MIND) The fox and the child (I cannot bring myself to rewatch it it's too fucking painful) The Aristocats (watched it like 100 times no jokes) The majority of Marvel movies Girls Interrupted

tagging @myrquez @giuventus @mugellocircuit and @muxas-world

do it if you feel like it <333333333

[theonekrafter]

hello! i love all your writing so much - your characters are super unique and refreshing, i was so excited when i saw your new naruto si/oc. do you have any fic recs (any fandom)?

TY!! i dont really make rec lists often but here's some now!

(sidenote, i keep almost ALL of my bookmarks public on ao3, so if you ever want to see what i'm reading you can probably find it there)

I'll just stick to naruto recs for now!

Naruto

Stretch, Fold, Expand by SenjuMizusaya

Kazue has not always been Kazue, but this does not make her less of a Nara, or less of a kunoichi, or less of a sister. Only less gullible. (Semi-SI into the Narutoverse.)

self insert into shikamaru's sister. there's only three chapters right now, but the clan political intrigue is super promising, as well as addressing a lot of canonical sexism.

Fallow Fields by zarinthel

For every rising star that the shinobi world produces, a hundred other geniuses are chewed up and spit out. Seiko crawls out of that grinder, only to find that she still has the rest of her life to face head on.

another si that is named seiko. completely embarrassed that i used the name as well without realizing, especially since this fic is so excellent and i would hate to cramp on the author's style.

a fic that is more focused on a slice of life story than an endless power grind, though the si does get a chance to be badass and awesome.

Glass Marionette by Haunted_Frost

It takes time to process the memories, but by the time Kankuro becomes a student at the Sunagakure Academy, he's certain he knows: he's in the Naruto universe, a village away, and he's standing next to a ticking time bomb at all times. One that he has an unfortunate urge to hug and tuck in for bed. Well, at least he gets to indulge in his inner theater kid with the whole puppet thing. That's a bonus. If he can just manage to wait out the worst of it, he might even become strong enough to make a difference in the upcoming war.

si into kankuro methodically destroys canon and makes a happy ending for people in under 100k words. marvelous, gay, and it's suna centric.

If 3 Reincarnated Ninja Were Fighting a Moon Goddess and One of Them Got Killed With a Rock, Would That Be Fucked Up Or What by mordox

Three random idiots were transmigrated into bodies of Konoha toddlers during the kyuubi attack. Each thinking they’re the only one who remembers a past life, they each try to hide it. Coincidentally, they are all assigned to Hatake Kakashi’s genin team since they were only average academy students and don’t have parents to complain about their children being failed via bell test, which happened with the last three teams he was assigned. What follows is three fools trying to hide their knowledge from each other and their jounin-sensei while desperately trying to reach chunin fast enough that Kakashi can teach the actual team seven, and a jounin-sensei who is very confused by his three genin but has so few (read: zero) points of reference for normal twelve year olds raised during peacetime that he can’t tell if they’re weird or not.

fucking hilarious. i'm not usually into multi-inserts but oh my GOD these three are disasters, and kakashi is just so confused. a series of assumptions from all three PLUS kakashi convincing them all that they're Normal.

"i sure hope no one realizes i just used the acronym PTSD, as in the english letters in the middle of my japanese sentence." "oh, i didn't know PTSD was a term in naruto. wow."

it's like watching a train wreck in slow motion. you can't look away.

The Scorpion and the Frog by zarinthel

Maybe the fate of Uchiha Itachi and the Uchiha Clan could have been changed if Itachi had just had one more family member he could trust -- someone as powerful, invested in Konoha, and devoted to the clan as him. Someone with a little extra knowledge up her sleeve. Unfortunately for Itachi, the Uchiha's abysmal luck with siblings has given him… Kaeru.

another zarinthel fic bc they are a super skilled and i appreciate them. completed fic. a genuinely good subversion of usual si tropes while still making the si op and kick ass. she's just uh. a little mentally ill about it. the entire time. and we love that for her.

THAT'S ALL FOR NOW! i hope you enjoy these!

[sarahhillips]

The Tea: An Intro

For Those That Hate Watching Videos and Prefer to Read Instead:

Greetings fellow Americans. If you’re watching this video and think, ‘That girl looks kind of familiar’, you’re not having deja vu, I’m physically standing before you. Since most of you don’t know who I am, allow me to introduce myself.

My name is Sarah Hiller, formerly Phillips, and from 2001 to 2002 I was the star of a show on PBS Kids called ‘Libertys Kids’. Libertys as in plural, not singular. It’s not ‘Liberty Kids’. But I won’t hold that against any of you because it happens all the time.

You’re probably wondering, ‘Sarah, what are you doing here?’ Well, I ended up here from my show and because I have no idea how to get back, I’m going to take advantage of the rights that were denied to me before.

Consider this a passion project if you will. Until the president bans TikTok or I get a cease and desist order from PBS, I’m going to be making videos where I, as you call it, ‘Spill the Tea’.

To say I was appalled when I first got here is an understatement. It took you people over a century to abolish slavery and you wouldn’t let (white) women vote until 1920. In addition, you people were such toddlers about having to wear a mask during the covid pandemic.

If you think wearing a mask makes you look stupid, try having smallpox. It’s not fun.

Then I find out that our government runs on a two-party system that does the opposite of uniting people. You can’t call yourselves the United States when a two-party system is causing all of you to bite and claw at each other. It’s like a game of political tug-of-war and it is exhausting.

It’s been nearly 250 years and this is the best your lawmakers are willing to do? That’s pathetic.

Don’t get me wrong, because I love to have sushi delivered while I binge John Oliver in an apartment that I pay for with my own money. I love walking through the city with a reusable cup that allows me to drink my tea on the go. I love having my own bank account with nobody around to tell me how to spend my money. I love that I got to vote in the last election. The workers and protestors who made these things possible are amazing.

In case you haven’t heard, the Supreme Court of the United States just voted to give the President complete immunity from any prosecution. So of say, the president sexually takes advantage of a young intern, word breaks out, and then she becomes the laughing stock of the country, he would not lose his job.

You know who else had immunity from prosecution? King George the Third. And if you watched my show or paid attention in your grade school history class, you know how that story ends. I’ll bet you if social media existed during colonial times, he’d also be tweeting from his chamberpot about those damn rebels ruining everything for him.

This kind of power should not be granted to anybody in a political position, because when you give a world leader this kind of power, they become dictators.

So needless to say, I’m not feeling very patriotic. I don’t know if I’ll ever be. I honestly regret switching sides and I’m starting to believe that Benedict Arnold had the right idea. My husband would be horrified if I told him this, but he’d be even more terrified when I’d explain why.

Today is the 4th of July and I’m not in a celebratory mood. No, I don’t want to go to a barbecue to celebrate independence and watch fireworks pollute the sky. What independence? You cannot be an independent nation when an evil orange threatens your way of living.

Plus, chances are that Kevin, the divorced deadbeat father of three, who believes that burger flippers don’t deserve a livable wage, will burn my burger to a crisp and only offer ketchup and mustard to put on it.

So today, I’m shutting myself away. I’m tired. And I know you’re tired too. It’s only human to be angry with your country, especially when your country does something like fund a genocide with your tax dollars. You don’t owe the United States unconditional devotion.

I’m looking at life through my own eyes, and it is bullshit. I’m ashamed of the United States, and that, my dears, is the tea. Thank you for watching. Be sure to like and follow for more Tea.

[thegreenleavesofspring]

To the lady at the outlet mall,

I do not remember your name, if I ever knew it. I very much doubt you remember mine, if I ever told you; I doubt you remember my existence, even.

But I remember you.

You see, I do not get attached to possessions, to things, the way a lot of people do. I own scarcely anything, and what I do possess it would be a nuisance to give up but I would not be heartbroken beyond the severe inconvenience it would cause.

But I do get attached to sentiment, and objects with sentiment attached.

Somewhere - I am not sure what box it is packed in - there is a watch. The spring is broken and it no longer fits my wrist; if I forgot to take the battery out before I packed it I know it is dreadfully corroded.

If and when I find it, I will not throw it away. I will smile wistfully at it and pack it safely away again. It was given to me by my sister, you see, and though family strife has torn us apart and we no longer speak, I still treasure that gift.

For the matter of that, I still have the cardboard shipping boxes that contained items sent by people I loved. How utterly absurd is that? I cannot throw away the boxes even. Because they have little hand-written notes on them or smiley faces and because someone put care into them for me. Do you understand? It is - all of it - anchors for memories.

My children are growing now, and it is time for me to pack up and give away their baby things. Blankets and toys and clothes that will never be needed again.

But there are some few things packed away in boxes to never be given away. The tiny outfit with inchworms on it, for one, that was the very first garment each of my children wore. The Star Wars onesies that were hands-down my favorite of all their clothes (and some of the few things I owned that I had picked out for myself) and that I put them in as soon as they were remotely big enough and kept putting them in as long as they were remotely small enough.

The blanket you gave me is one of those things. Do you remember? I do.

I was sitting on the concrete bench in the middle of the mall with a car seat beside me - the giant ones that convert into a toddler seat, not the mobile ones for carrying the baby - and my infant son in my lap, crying my eyes out in dismay and despair and clutching my son as though he were the only comfort in the world.

You were the only one who noticed. You came and asked if I was okay, and I tried to put you off but you insisted. I admitted that my husband had abandoned me and the baby there.

You were so kind. You took me to Starbucks right across the courtyard - the first and only time I have ever been - and were so patient with my dithering and my awkward pride and my stunned shock. When I could not decide you helped me choose a hot chocolate.

You asked if I needed a ride and I said no, I had called my mother to come get me and insisted that you return to your friends and your shopping. I sat outside in the sun and sipped my hot chocolate and held my son and waited for my mother. But you happened back by before she came.

And you had bought me a blanket, a baby blanket. It was dark blue and spangled with stars on one side and had a tiny moon and a handful of stars in one corner on the other side and it was already a little too small for my son and it was so. kind. And it brought me to tears all over again.

I have used that blanket for all my children since.

I hope that wherever you are, you are well.

Thank you.

[rafasbiscuits]

Tagged by @schumi-nadal and @fisherkings thank u for tagging me guys it's always an honour, love youuu😘😘

Rules: post 10 of your favorite comfort mfovies then tag 10 people.

1. X Men movie series. Definitely, absolutely, undoubtedly, comfort movie. X Men. I remember watching the prequels with my brother as a kid when it's only the two of us at home. It's not just a comfort movie it's literally a fricking nostalgia for me. Then continued watching the whole timeline when I had my own computer.

2. STAR WARS MOVIES!!! Been a fan since I was a literal toddler and grew up with this. All sorts of nostalgia will come rushing to me and I will immediately feel hugged everytime I listen to the theme and just, see a familiar character. hey I don't know any lore cause I don't watch the cartoons but I watch enough to know what's going on🤷

3. Mean Girls. Yes, I watch Mean Girls on repeat everytime I eat lunch, it helps me eat cause I get distracted by all the drama going on, it's not nostalgic or anything cause I first watched it like two years ago but it is definitely a favourite and an absolute comfort movie.

4. Any Ghibli movies, I mean cmon, Ghibli!!! All my childhood anime movies are made from Ghibli. I love every single one of themm

5. Any Barbie movies (especially the Mariposa one, and the Princess Academy one and OMG THE MERMAID ONE!!) wait the mermaid one definitely needs its own like thing but I'm just putting it here. THE MERMAID BARBIE IS SO ICONIC I LOVE THAT MOVIE SO SO MUCH omg I have to rewatch

6. Twilight Series. Don't- actually. yes. I don't care anymore, I will not keep denying the fact that I LOVE this movie. It's part of my childhood and this movie really gave me alot of memories, I always watch the series whenever I'm sad or stressed about school..which is, all the time.

7. GOTG trilogy. Ugh, I mean I'm a Marvel fan in general (but I lean more to X Men), but Guardians Of The Galaxy will always be special to me. And the trilogy ended this year too and lemme tell you i CRIED. I remember begging my brother to lend me his USB so I can watch the first movie, and I did (took me a few weeks) and then BAM! Found comfort characters, all their songs became my comfort songs and immediately became a comfort movie, seriously the whole movie feels like home to me, god I love them.

8. Brokeback Mountain. I don't need to say anything about this, explains alot already.

9. Interstellar. Loved that movie to the CORE. watched it on the cinema and this movie made me fall in love with Nolan.

10. mmm I can't think of anything anymore but uhhh 2001: A Space Oddysey. Love it forever and always, the beginning of time and all that, loved the book it's one of my favourite books. And then the movie was just out of this world (literally) soundtrack? Top. Acting? Absolutely fantastic. Cinematography? yES. Perfection. I have an interest in the topic which is why I just feel so happy when I rewatch it..

Tagging...uhhh: @yoellglia @swaggypsyduck @tam-is-blogging @thefrootloopman @hubillusion @jcferrero @bluespring864 @raulsevyn @soronya @janesurlife (I'd love to tag all of you, yes the one who is reading this, but it says 10, I love you all very much tho😘)

[underratedbananawerewolf]

Fictober Day 3

Prompt 3: "Okay, show me." 

Fandom: Honkai Star Rail 

Rating: G 

Warnings: None 

Since bringing Yanqing home with him, Jing Yuan had had to make some adjustments to his life; ones that he hadn’t made when he first brought Mimi home. But a toddler was much different than a kitten and he couldn’t just leave the care of the boy to someone else, not after the whole ordeal of adopting him in the first place.  

So, in the end, paperwork had come home with him so he could work while watching Yanqing. The Seat of Divine Foresight was hardly the place for a baby, especially one who had just learned that he could run. Still, the general couldn’t deny that he enjoyed the happy giggles as he chased Yanqing during the times he could spare. The happiness in the child’s eyes lifted some of the weight that had settled on his shoulders for longer than he cared to remember.  

Still, there was one facet of his work that the man could not neglect, nor could he have a baby get in the way of. Jing Yuan led the soldiers of the Luofu as a war general and that meant he needed to stay in peak condition. Lazy he might be in everything else, but it didn’t tend to show in his training. He was far too disciplined, and he knew the folly of being lax when it came to fighting skill.  

IN those early days it was easy to take up his glaive while Yanqing was napping but as he grew older the need for mid-day naps diminished. It was far harder to slip away now before the child came looking for him. Yanqing may have only been three, but he was already showing a remarkable level of intelligence. It made keeping him behind closed doors long enough to be out of danger far more difficult than Jing Yuan could ever imagine. There were times when he questioned his judgement in adopting this tiny menace but the bright smile and large gleaming eyes when turned towards him always chased those thoughts.  

Finally deciding that the best thing to do with Yanqing was sit him down and explain why he had to be careful around the glaive or any other weapon he might find. He might as well try even though he had to wonder just how much the boy grasped.  

Shockingly, perhaps, Yanqing obeyed to the letter. He sat on the bench in the garden, simply watching Jing Yuan’s every move with an intensity that most toddlers didn’t possess.  

It was one afternoon when Jing Yuan had finished his workout, taking a moment to drink the water he had set down when he looked down to see Yanqing standing at his feet and tugging on his pant leg. “Yes, Yanqing?”  

“Look!” The boy held up a stick he had found, one that was nearly as tall as himself and possessed two offshoots that made it look like a crude sword. “I can fight too, Baba.” He grinned up at the man.  

Jing Yuan couldn’t help the smile that he gave in return, the sunshine in that childish smile contagious. Bapa. The name always made his heart melt just a little bit, the sting of a tear or two felt in his eyes. Never had he imagined in his long life that he would be called that. His life had never been granted the opportunity for a family and, he had to admit, he never really pursued it. That dream wasn’t his. He had others. And yet here he was, an old man even by Xianzhou standards and he had a son that lit up his life in ways he hadn’t expected. What started out as a debt to repay no longer felt like a duty but a privilege.  

“Fight like me, huh?” He teased. “You must have been practicing hard then.”  

Yanqing nodded vigorously. “For days and days and days.” He smiled again. “You were working.”  

“Ah, I should be worried now that you know how to sneak around me.”  

That brought about another giggle. “I’m very very quiet.”  

“You must be for me to not notice.” Jing Yuan had noticed Yanqing had left, of course, but he figured the boy had simply gone off to play. It wasn’t as if there was anyplace he could reach that would endanger him. The thought that he had gone to imitate him of all people was a surprise. “Alright, if you can fight like me,” He smiled fondly at his son. “Then show me.” 

[empirebackshots]

i found out about the machete viewing order recently and i think it works pretty nicely since there's kind of no easy way to watch either chronological or release order that doesn't make it a bit jarring (if you are not a toddler or someone who doesn't know the most popular movie spoiler of all time). but what gets me is seemingly how many people think or used to think that the phantom menace is optional. THE PHANTOM MENACE IS A LOT OF THINGS BUT OPTIONAL IS NOT ONE OF THEM

like idk if sequel fans know about this but movie series used to have these things called "cohesive narratives" that were "planned out". and i truly believe that if george lucas thought this stage of star wars lore was skippable then it would not be a movie. it's literally so important in understanding anakin's character to see him as this innocent little guy who despite his hard life knew his mother's love and then when he gets a chance to be freed the jedi shun him for not being born into a life of suppressing love. to be called dangerous for being a fairly normal kid who feels emotions. so yeah if you take a guy like that and suddenly change his whole worldview to start suppressing everything he's gonna turn out a little fucked! ppl who don't get this movie think he's just always been an evil freak but this movie is yelling in your face that he could very easily have NOT become darth vader and it's KIND OF THE JEDI'S FAULT! which puts further into perspective why the climax of the lucas saga is luke DEFYING the jedi order with the power of love. anyway. i just think it's pretty helpful in the grand scheme of things

[reachingforthevoid]

Dr Who: the Evil of the Daleks 

I watched the black and white animated reconstruction with the original episode 2 on 8 January 2023. I’d not seen this reconstructed version before, but I think I may have seen the original serial.

When people ask me what Dr Who story I watched first, I can only answer, “I don’t know.” My parents were not fans of SFF and Dr Who would never have been a show they would watch if it was up to them. But, when I was an infant and toddler, we had the child of one of my great aunts stay with us for a while. She — the kid — was ten years older than me, and she loved SFF. Watching shows like Star Trek, My Favourite Martian, Lost in Space, and — inevitably — Dr Who became part of my family’s life during the late 1960s and early 1970s. When she left us, apparently I insisted we keep watching Dr Who… and we did.

I grew up in Australia where the TV schedules were very different. I have no memory of what I watched as a little kid, my only clues being the amusing anecdotes told by my parents over the years. One story that my mother loved to tell featured me as a toddler bursting into inconsolable tears when a Dalek was destroyed. I wasn’t talking then, but I was crawling and able to pull myself up to point at the TV screen so there was no mistaking about what had upset me so. 

The Evil of the Daleks was shown out of order in Australia, but at exactly the time when I was of the age described. It was also the only Dalek serial shown at the time. And, yes, my parents knew what a Dalek was.

Anyway, no childhood memories were unlocked while I watched this serial, which marked the end of Dr Who’s fourth season. It starts neatly by following on from the mysterious disappearance of the TARDIS from Gatwick airport — not vanishing, like the TARDIS is wont to do later on, but nicked on the back of a truck. The Doctor and Jamie give chase, and become involved in a 1960’s cold war spy thriller for a bit… and it’s such a shame that the original footage isn’t available to watch. The audience is aware of another mystery, an antique store selling brand new Victoriana and the man running it, Edward Waterfield, looks like he’s stepped out from a Victorian novel… but where are the promised Daleks? 

Audiences following on will recall that the Daleks can travel through time. The plot is their elaborate trap to snare the Doctor, which works. The remaining six episodes take us to the mansion of Theodore Maxtible (who looks rather like Karl Marx) in the year 1866, and to the planet Skaro. By my reckoning, that’s the first time we’ve returned to Skaro since 1964. It’s also the first time we see an amped up Dalek, this one called emperor. Dudley Simpson’s score works well to juxtapose the times and places.

By the end of the serial, Victoria Waterfield becomes one of two travelling companions. Two is a good number with this Doctor. Three is just too unwieldy. However, it’s curious to have both being young humans from Great Britain, one from 1746 and the other from 1866. 

[unrequited-words]

I haven't had a chance to write down how I'm feeling lately. Since it's January 2nd I just wanted to write down how the first day of a new year went.

It was an okay day. I had Sunday off like I normally do. I woke up around nine and got to sleep in. The bed we have is a piece of dogshit and my back has been fucked for a while.

We had the older kids for a week and it was the last day we had with them. They mostly stayed in their room we have set up for them. My stepdaughter on her phone/tablet and my stepson on his tablet.

It was snowing all day. The baby was pretty okay for the most part. Doing toddler things like getting into everything and asking me to watch Paw Patrol for the 72nd time which is normal for her.

Later that afternoon I put her down for a nap and I got to relax with the older kids and my husband. She woke up around 4:30 or so and about 5:15 I had the bright idea to shovel the driveway to help my husband since he did the porch in the back yard earlier that day.

I figured since I'm out here let me get the kids ready to play in the snow. The baby lasted ten minutes maybe as she kept putting her hands directly in the snow and cried and said ouch (I need to buy her some damn gloves)

My stepson made a snow Angel, we had a snowball fight with the older two kids. After ten minutes I took her back in to warm up with her dad who stayed in because it was too cold.

My step daughter went in and after five minutes I had my step son play in the back yard with the snow. My husband finished up dinner.

Later that night, we watched Star Wars. The two older ones could give a flying fuck about the movie. My stepson I guess is on the spectrum so I had to get on top of him on certain things. The baby was in and out of watching the movie and would rather watch Cocomelon.

I fell asleep twenty minutes before it ended. Around 10 the kids went to bed and so did the baby. Husband fell asleep on me which was fantastic because I never see him or get to spend time with him since I've been working a lot of overtime.

Not a bad first of the year.

January 2nd

I woke up at 830 because my back has been fucking killing me since I shoveled the snow last night. I picked their bags, made breakfast and of course yelled at my stepson because he can't pay attention to anything more than five seconds at a time.

Around 11 am we left. Husband is driving and we've seen several cars spin out because of the snow, multiple car wrecks and Utah drivers who can't drive worth dick.

This trip usually takes three hours to drop the kids off and it's taken an hour more due to heavy traffic, having to rebuckle this toddler and readjust myself over and over to get comfortable.

I'll write more when I have something else to update with besides get off my lawn, my back hurts etc 😂

EDIT

2:30 p.m 1/2/23

Dropped off the kids with their mom. Due to weather and snow for us she beat us by ten minutes when we are normally early. I changed the baby in the bathroom. I came back out and had the older two hug their sister.

I strapped her in and husband said we'll stop in an hour and I said well let me pee. I went back inside to pee and while in the bathroom my stepson hugged me and I cried. I owed went back out with the kids and their mom. My daughter hugged me and I hugged her right and cried again.

I tried so hard to hold it together but the connection I feel with her has always been there since day one. I made sure the baby was strapped in tightly since she Houdini'd herself out of the damn car seat during the way there.

I forgot the tablet and husband said I was gonna say to hop back with her. I almost dove back there since she was complaining already. She had my phone the whole way.

Between where we live and Nephi it got really scary. We made it home at 6 pm and left at 11 am. What a long stressful drive. It's eight and a hot shower is calling my name.

Happy New Years for what it's worth

[the-overanalyzer]

I posted 10,344 times in 2022

That's 41 more posts than 2021!

262 posts created (3%)

10,082 posts reblogged (97%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@yuriinadress

@snyderman37

@talysalankil

@cavitysearch

@demipunk

I tagged 4,300 of my posts in 2022

#batfam - 1,075 posts

#i'll stick queue in my prayers - 492 posts

#yj - 393 posts

#star wars - 194 posts

#superfam - 188 posts

#food - 175 posts

#flashfam - 156 posts

#elden ring - 150 posts

#kh - 149 posts

#kitties! - 113 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#hal jordan and lady blackhawk get together once a month to bitch about how nobody in the justice league respects air traffic control procedu

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Timberkon dynamic I think has a ton of potential: Kon finds out that Tim is dating a civilian and, because he has never been able to really get Tana’s death and how it fucked him up out of his head AND he’s painfully aware of Tim’s track record of coping with loss he’s just sort of like “well time to be this dude’s unofficial bodyguard i guess” because not on his watch, baby, and Bernard spends the next few weeks spotting what he’s pretty sure is the elder Superboy out of the corner of his eye, trying and failing to be inconspicuous as he scans their surrounds for threats, and he wants to say something, but conspiracy theories about the shadow government are one thing, “I am personally being stalked by a superhero” is quite another, and Gotham has a pretty low threshold for what justifies a 72 hour hold. But because it’s Gotham, trouble does happen and Kon does end up stepping in a few times, which only sort of puts Bernard’s mind at ease, since he’s pretty sure he’s not hallucinating but also this is just inexplicable, but he does come to associate the sight of Kon with a feeling of safety and security, and Kon meanwhile spends enough time watching Bernard that he starts to be charmed by him and really gets what Tim sees in the guy. Tim notices nothing for six months.

403 notes - Posted June 7, 2022

#4

Fake Bruce: ...once you’re out of this phase.

Tim: Haaaaaaang on a second. *takes out phone*

Tim: Aha! According to the Bruce Mood Swing Calendar I’ve been maintaining since I was twelve, there should still be three months until you start being an asshole about this!

Tim: Hey Bart, I think you were right about this world being a fake. Bruce is being an asshole three months ahead of schedule!

Bart: The old Batman Dickheadedness Timetable. Trips ‘em up every time.

462 notes - Posted July 19, 2022

#3

Cassie ships TimKon because she cares about the two of them and wants them to be happy.

Bart ships TimKon because he thinks it’s better that they’re together rather than breaching containment and inflicting themselves on some poor innocent outsiders.

463 notes - Posted September 30, 2022

#2

Emiko tells people about her nephews and they're expecting toddlers, only to be greeted by two very jacked, very adult men. Lian tells her teacher that her great-aunt is picking her up that day, and said great-aunt is coming from the high school right next door, where she is a sophomore.

577 notes - Posted June 20, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

tim who gazes at kitchens in helpless confusion is OUT tim who works very hard to bake treats for his loving boyfriend is IN

1,022 notes - Posted June 7, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[warishaaa]

Everything has always been like purple skies, old odes, healing ale, a refrigerator full of chocolates, cinnamon rolls, ginger biscuits, a pocket full of smiles, bedtime stories where the fairy removes all misery with a magic wand, flowery memory lanes, small parks, magical sunsets, high swing sets under grey clouds smelling of fresh tea and snacks, evenly spread butter sandwiches, photo albums smelling of tears and laughter, Hot soups and whimsical lines of your favorite artists, Sunday outings, strawberry ice creams after every dentist visit, wiping the extra food off my mouth, warming my hands before leaving for school, shopping for school uniform every year, and stories of my first word, first walk, first day at school, the first letter I wrote, how it wasn't an A but an O.

How life doesn't come a full circle because the list of firsts ends, at the first time getting touched on a bright sunny afternoon after school with my body going numb, the first pair of familiar eyes staring down at my breasts that hadn't even grown, the first time my heart breaks over a crispy smiled- gorgeous boy, the first time of feeling the world isn't a land of mystery solving which leads to another until you find the palace meant for you because you are born a princess, first time realizing you can't be a princess because your parents are not king and queen and all the dynasties have been turned to dust and that's fine because you don't need a palace, when you grow up home is all that you crave and the first time realizing Santa can not fulfill your wish of not being so scared, and lonely because he isn't fucking real.

Life has always been your way to you, You were trying so hard to stitch a perfect story for yourself, for us, that you made a new family in denial. You abandoned us trying to look after us. Maybe you were trying to escape this hideous hole that has been growing ever since you were a kid which has attached its part to me in your womb. You don't get it, we are born with a black hole on our chins that inertly spreads and that's okay, No amount of love-filled carcass of words can change its identity,and I would do fine without cotton candies disappearing as soon as it touches the inside of my mouth, I won't ask where they went anymore like I didn't ask where those people went from my past. Watching people disappear is the only magic we get in this lifetime.

You say girls like me are made of fire and grit, meant to conquer and sail through storms but Ma, girls like me fall apart at the first sound of hail and search for love like it's the most important document they lost beforean important day, You tell me I have steel for feet that can walk through an apocalypse after making sure I walked on silk carpet as a toddler, and I look down and find neither. "Girls like me don't waste time on boys, girls like me know how to talk, girls like come straight from god's favorite garden," But Ma, girls like me have cried an ocean over soft-spoken boys, girls like me have killed their voice, girls like me are born of war and blood.Girls like me don't aim for stars but starve for a hand to guide us out from the hollow consuming darkness of our minds, Girls like me don't sing because our throat is filled with this liquid that spits sorrow.

You hear birds chirping at dawn and know it's fajr how could you never hear my muffled squeak or you tried to hide it in with a pair of extra dangling earrings, the stones in it shining as bright as the venus in a clear sky? You congratulate my heartache and call my cowardice brave, that sometimes it's brave to be a coward if it saves me and I don't know what you mean by it but more than that you don't know what you mean. When I asked, you you said you don't understand heartbreaks but I have seen your heart ache for seven thousand two hundred fifty-six days of my existence. Your happy stories are saddest to me because in them I find a tiring effort of breathing a delusion. I carried my most painful collection of peoms like if it slips and finds you, you would be devastated but when i let it out you heard like a distracted twelve year old because you didn't want to lift it's weight. You want the pain to be over without the suffering.

[drivergemini]

hellfire baby :: e.m.

summary: when starting a new campaign, the hellfire club didn’t except to see a toddler sitting in their club leader’s throne

content warning: parenting & pregnancy, talks about teen parenting, swearing, basically really fluffy, child’s features mostly based off of eddie

word count: 1013

when all of the hellfire boy’s entered through the theater room’s doors, they felt a huge rush of excitement. eddie had been hyping up his new campaign for about a month and told everyone that he was going to do something real special for their first meeting. 

what they did not expect was a small little girl, maybe around 1 or 2 years old, sitting in their dungeon master’s place. she had a pink dragon onesie on and her big brown eyes stared back at the group. 

“why good evening lovely gentlemen.” eddie popped out from behind his throne, holding a small sandwich bag filled with ‘star wars’ cookies. he handed it to the child with barely any acknowledgement and she gladly grabbed it with eager hands. “are you lads ready to start this wonderful campaign?”

each boy had their own looks of confusion on their faces. they looked at eddie and then the child, then back again.

“eddie why the hell is there a baby here?” dustin was the one who spoke up. 

eddie’s face sported a wide grin. “well guys i would like to introduce you to the surprise i mentioned.” he scooped up the little girl and presented her to the d&d club memebers. “everyone this is my daughter mei. say hi mei mei.”

“hi mei mei.” the little voice spoke a she waved a tiny hand to the boys. she tugged her onesie hood down, reveling long, brown hair, just like her dad’s.

“daughter? eddie we didn’t even know you could speak to girls?” mike chimed in.

“well wheeler, if it matters to you, i don’t speak to girls because i already have my fiance.” he raised his eyebrows at the last part. 

you see, eddie munson didn’t become a super-super senior because he was dumb. he became a super-super senior because he accidentally got his high school girlfriend pregnant. they had been together since they were 16. eddie and y/n were going great until the summer before their senior year. y/n’s pregnancy took a large toll to both of their academics, so eddie decided he would try and lighten his girlfriend’s stress load. on april 29th, 1984, their daughter was born. 

he thought y/n’s future was too bright for her to be held back, so after she gave birth he let her continue as an almost normal high school student. eddie didn’t get to graduate that year. but he did get to hold his baby as he watched the love of his life walk the stage. 

he didn’t graduate his second senior year either. he was too caught up in healthy parenting and making sure he was there to watch his daughter’s firsts. he watched her first steps, her first time eating solid foods, and even heard her first word. ‘dragon’.

so here he was, his third senior year, finally ready to walk that stage.

as eddie finished up the story he heard a sniff. all heads turned toward the direction of lucas. 

“dude that story was so beautiful. i didn’t even know that.”

“yeah most people don’t except a few people who were in school during that time like harrington. but y/n kind of chose to drop off the map so it isn’t talked about much.” eddie sat down in his chair and placed his daughter on his lap. “now that introductions are out of the way, shall we get started?”

- 

eddie’s new campaign was centered around exploring an abandoned gem mine to figure out what was terrorizing the near by townsfolk. 

“so little dwarf, you enter the cave with your mates behind you. as you guide them with your light, the air becomes increasingly warm. as you approach the growing heat, you see a shimmer of pink scales.”

“munson you did not...” dustin starts as his hands grip the table.

“you raise your torch higher and you see her in all her glory...” eddie lifts mei off of his lap and places her in the middle of the table. “mei the fire breathing dragon.”

all the boys start to exclaim in frustration. what kind of sick father makes his own kid the first boss of his d&d campaign? eddie munson that’s who. after explaining they all need a time out to discuss, they all huddled in the corner. 

“dude what are we going to do? we can’t slay the dragon. i mean look at her, she’s adorable!” dustin whispered.

“i mean honestly if you think about it, it’s just a game.” mike said. typical.

“yes but the moral principal of it is, eddie knows that we would have to be sick son’s of bitches to kill a kid. especially his daughter.” dustin explained frustrated. 

him and mike felt a little wedge between their legs. they all looked down to see mei still holding her bag of cookies. 

“tooktie?” she raised it up to the air, offering the boys a share of her snack. 

each boy took only one, while politely thanking her for sharing. she unwedged herself from the huddle and waddled towards her dad. 

“juice peas?” she said to him, pointing to a sippy cup sitting on the table. he handed her the cup and looked at the clock on the wall.

“unfortunately boys, time is up for today’s meeting.” eddie tsked. 

just as he said that, y/n opened the door to the club room and walked in scanning around. each person all had their eyes on her.

“mommy!” mei squealed, running towards the young woman. she jumped into her arms, y/n picking her up and spinning her around. 

eddie grabbed a small child lunch box and walked towards the two girls. “as you see i can't stay any later than i’m supposed to tonight guys. but this will give you some more time to think about your next move.”

he trailed behind the two girls, waving everyone goodbye. 

as the door closed, each hellfire member could hear a faint, “eddie why is our daughter talking about slaying a dragon?”

followed by “edward munson why did our daughter just say son of a bitch?”