#been wanting to post this for 2 weeks but uni kicked my ass to the ground..i fear
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pillsopa · 5 months ago
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anyone remember adam parrish, the bella swan of henrietta. let’s sit and think now…
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dmercer91 · 1 year ago
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ebug's sister, dm91
ok, first post where blake is blake!! also, excuse the absolute dumpster fire that is my life, and is the reason that this post is one post and not like 47
last season! (2022-23) part one / part two / part three / part four / part five / part six / part seven / part eight / part nine / part ten / part eleven / part twelve
(2023-24)! part one /
blakefriarr_
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liked by dawson1417, adamfantilli and 6,947 others
blakefriarr_: so many things have happened since i last popped up on all your timelines and made them immeasurably better!
this is episode one of season two of i-am-both-the sister-of-the-devils-home-emergency-backup-goaltender-and-also-happen-to-be dating-dawson-mercer-forward-for-the-devils series!
these pictures are in no particular order, because, i am moving into a new place with afore mentioned dawson mercer and have spent the last several weeks making it look like it's not the most depressing back alley murderous apartment any of you have ever laid your eyes on
and apparently, i have a ball ton of stuff!
regardless, here's what i've caught up on;
the entire nhl draft! though i have not acquired any new adoptees, it did come to my attention that the anaheim ducks as an organization did personally victimize me during the 2023 entry draft (they also took a BALLSY amount of time to re-sign bitch one and bitch two. what the literal fuck, dudes). also- if you are seeing this and you need help to flee, blink twice (not you adam) (you know who you are)
2, the entire preseason was also missed while i was one, curing myself from jetlag and the absolute dread of going back to uni and two, moving my egregious amount of shit with a spiteful level of independence. the devils won every preseason game! dawson scored that clusterfuck of a goal on slide two and we also got to see goalie bonks again! (i told you those pics weren't in order and i meant it)
three, (or four, i forgot what came first) quinneth played his first regular season game as captain of the canucks ad they kicked ass against the edmonton dudes. goncrats captain ;p
four (probably) rookie had both his first reg season nhl game AND his birth on the same day! he cried on camera for thousands of viewers and made me question kidnapping his brother and locking him in an abandoned building in ohio (who am i kidding i don't want to be in ohio). the blue jackets have since been doing blue jacket things (losing)
five (it's all blended together these days) the devs started their regular season and now i get to go to the arena and watch in peace as nico makes dumb faces, jack gets into petty scrums and goes to the box (apparently? that ones new.) and dawson does dawson things (be hot)
sixth and finally, assistant coach and captain quinn (he should probably drop a title for his mental health, me thinks) turned 24! i giggled profusely at an edit of him as tracksuit rob. good job on aging, kid 🎉
that's all, i think. (probably not, what do i know)
view 712 comments..
jj.friar31: remember when we were roomies??? siblings defying the odds?? i've been left out to dry. i'm MARINATING in my loneliness. you've basically shot me and left me out for dead, blakey.
→ blakefriarr_: this is a touch dramatic, that's MY thing
→ jj.friar31: if i agree to never steal your dramatics again will you come back
→ blakefriarr_: have u seen how pretty my boyfriend is?? no dude
→ jj.friar31: blake pls
adamfantilli: of every picture you could've used you just decided to screenshot me crying
→ blakefriarr_: hi im blake have we met??
→ adamfantilli: also, do not kidnap luca.
→ blakefriarr_: oh so you just don't want my love?? is that what this is??
→ luca.fantilli: do not kidnap me
→ blakefriarr_: BOOORRRINNNGGGGG
nicohischier: every day i wonder what it would be like if we didn't let the ebug's come into the room
→ blakefriarr_: do you want dawson to be lonely and bitchless
→ nicohischer: yeah kinda??
→ blakefriarr_: oh
jackhughes: why.
→ blakefriarr_ ehehehe your bucket doing weird things
_quinnhughes: ??????? why am i tracksuit rob????
→ blakefriarr_: who else would be tracksuit rob
→ _quinnhughes: nobody needs to be tracksuit rob, friar.
→ _blakefriarr_: WRONG! you do :)
_connorbedard: am i who i are???
→ blakefriarr_: no apparently you are timbaland
→ _connorbedard: oh. okay?
→ adamfantilli: @/_connorbedard you get used to it
→ _connorbedard: do i want to??
→ adamfantilli: eh. 50/50
dawson1417: oh how i've missed the chaos
→ blakefriarr_: fbejdbsjshdghshsb
→ dawson1417: sometimes it's almost like you say words
→ blakefriarr_: :p i love you
→ dawson1417: i love you too, my girl <3
tannercharlotte: this is my reality tv
→ blakefriarr_: i'll leave him for u say the word
→ dawson1417: HEY??
→ blakefriarr_: shhhh baby go sleep
→ tannercharlotte: don't leave him b he doesn't have to know
ryangraves27: she back
→ blakefriarr_: i back!!
nhlblackhawks: ??
→ njdevils: don't '??' her she's right
→ blakefriarr_: thank you (trade for charlie)
→ nyrangers: i can excuse hawks slander but i draw the line at trying to take our char
→ nhlblackhawks: you can excuse hawks slander?
→ jj.friar31: why do teams keep doing this you have ENOUGH leverage over me
trevorzegras: am i bitch one or bitch two
→ trevorzegras: actually yk what don't answer that i don't wanna know
→ blakefriarr_: too bad you're actually both jamie is an angel
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ilsanslut · 1 year ago
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NEW CHARACTER AI BOTS + UPDATE!
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for those of you who do not care about my page update, and wish to directly view the bots i've posted, please venture beneath the cut. bot requests are currently open.
hiii everyone, vampiie here! since it's my final semester of classes before i can get my license, uni has really been kicking my ass as of late. however, in december, things are coming to a close and in the following weeks i should i have more time to write and produce new content for all of you.
unfortunately, i am not taking fic requests at the moment, and the fic requests i did have will be put on hold until i can produce the following fic: TREAT YOU BETTER PT.2 FT SAE + RIN ITOSHI. (shameless plug for you to click here if you want to read it btw teehee) the reason for this, is because my motivation for writing has just begun to come back to me and i don't want to burn myself out before i can produce this promised content to you all. also, THANK YOU FOR 1.1K FOLLOWERS???? HELLO???? (i don't monitor who follows me like most people so some of yall are probably bots but-) HOLY SHIT?? truthfully, i never thought i would ever hit that high of a number for my following on tumblr and i'm truly grateful for all of the support on my fics, bots, and blog. i truly do love yall SEVERELY. ♡
and now for the content a majority of you a probably here for, my C.AI bots! here are my latest bots nagi seishiro, sukuna, and revenant now available for your roleplaying endeavors. hope you enjoy and happy simping! ♡
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DIRECT LINKS TO BOTS:
nagi one rev one rev two sukuna one sukuna two sukuna three
you can find my c.ai profile by clicking the following link, my c.ai username is vampiieluv!
if the direct link does not work for whatever reason, try copying and pasting it into your browser as there is a bit of a known problem with certain c.ai links not linking directly to the app.
also, bot requests are OPEN. please refer to my RULES and FANDOMS before requesting a bot. thank you! (´ ω `♡)
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quillthrillswriting · 5 months ago
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to all of my lovely readers i promise i have not forsaken you!!! i've been super super inactive for the last week or so and i haven't updated via a03 in a minute so i just wanted to hop on and explain myself:))
i just started two jobs at once to pay for uni & rent and it is absolutely kicking my ass!!! i had to work 24+ hours over 2 days last weekend just so I didn't get double-booked between the two jobs, and in general, i'm super exhausted literally all the time right now 🤧🤍
hopefully this tiredness is not permanent!! i'm still learning how to balance my time around the jobs, so right now, i'm in a bit of a schedule-adjustment period as i figure out how to make time for myself & my hobbies while still working:)
this is pretty much why i haven't been active on tumblr & ao3. over the next week, my work schedule is going to cool down a bit, so i plan to keep at my WIPs and hopefully both release some ao3 updates & make some tumblr scheduled posts so i can keep on top of my fic promo:)
you can expect a new chap of the teenager in the iceberg and a new kataang wish (2023) - inspired oneshot, if happiness were a tangible thing, it would be you, a gift fic inspired by/ for @antizutara coming out in the next week or so!! i promise i am doing my very best to write more as the days go on:))<3 thank u for all the love and hi to the new cool ppl who have followed me even through i dropped off of the internet for a sec hehe!!<3
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loudlyunladylike · 11 months ago
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oh u want more asks? I can do that!!! Loudly how have u been? I am currently procrastinating on a final project for Spanish that's due 2morrow and I'm succeeding I think, more ppl r joining my fav fandom (find us alive) I think bcuz I see more ppl liking my posts and kudosing my fics about it and it is really really exciting
For Christmas 2 weeks ago (maybe 3 weeks? The math isn't hard if I bothered to sit down and think about it, but I'm not going to!) I got edible glitters amd since then basically all of my drinks have been glittery, because I deserve it, I think you'd like the rose gold or silver glitter but idk, i've got a green glitter that I like in theory but doesn't show up so well, so I actually prefer gold glitter, from the same person that got me the glitter I got butterfly socks so we win these, and everyone I got gifts for seemed to like them!!! So holiday season was good
New years kinda kicking my ass tho, but that's only bcuz I came back from holiday break, had a week of school and now it's final week, my grades are all set up rn so it's impossible for me to get anything lower than a B which I'm glad for but there is one class that I'm straight up not enjoying but don't think I can drop (AP stats my beloathed :/) Hope ur doing well, and I just learned schrodinger had a first name last week! ❤️❤️❤️ -Moth anon
Oh my god heyyyyy!!!! <3333 That sounds so lovely, I would go so crazy with that much glitter lmao, genuinely love the intensive review you gave there. And it's always so lovely when new people are getting into your interests, big dub for you, you're winning. Also good luck with your school stuff I bet you're gonna smash it regardless, I believe in you <333
I am doing well!!! Currently absolutely up to my EARS in uni work but I'm getting through it, and my gf is over this week which always helps and is lovely <3
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jincherie · 5 years ago
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kiss it better | jjk
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~ COMMISSION FOR @cinnaminsvga​​ ~
✩ — pairing: jungkook x reader ✩ — genre: college/uni au, smut, cheerleader!jk, pining, borderline crack ✩ — words: 11.7k ✩ — rating: 18+ ✩ — warnings: koo takes a tumble, explicit sexual content; clothed sex, unprotected sex (not recommended), creampie, handjobs,light subby!jk, hand-holding during sex (potent), whining, thigh-riding, vaginal sex, minor hair pulling, public sex (sort of), multiple orgasms, overstimulation, light dirty talk ✩ — notes: out later than intended and a bit longer than intended !! whoops!!! i won’t/don’t charge if i go over the commissioned amount becayse that’s my bad!! but yeah. its been a hot second since i last wrote smut!! also none of my friends were awake to proofread this so….. apologies if it’s shit and has typos! its 2am! pls enjoy and lmk whast u think!!
When one goes to Kim Seokjin for advice, it’s almost guaranteed to never end well. This is something Jungkook learns quickly when he mistakenly follows treasured advice to ‘be smart’ and ‘use his assets’. He just did what he was told! Of course, the execution was a bit poor… and embarrassing. But hey, if rocking up to cheer practice in a skirt doesn’t woo your crush, what will?
masterlist | — posted; 01.03.2020
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TUESDAY, SEMESTER 2 WEEK FOUR
It’s a beautiful day, the sun has just come to peak out from behind the clouds that had earlier obscured its climb from the horizon, and the grass of the Biological Sciences Library courtyard glistens with raindrops left over from the brief shower that prefaced the sun’s belated appearance. Students are finally beginning to emerge from the safety of the undercover walkways and overhangs, venturing boldly to shortcut over the grass. University life resumes, and everything falls back into its place, all as usual.
“Yah, is that Jungkook? Wait what is he—”
Well, everything except for one thing.
A red and black-clad figure slams to a stop right where two students are sitting and minding their own business outside the café attached to the back of the library—there’s no time to say hello. The table rocks dangerously on its beaten, metal leg, the impact of Jungkook’s beeline almost sending it straight to the ground if the two others weren’t already seated there to catch it.
“OW!” Jimin is never one to be quiet in his complaints, all too happy to holler his outrage at the top of his lungs. As his oldest hyung would say, no attention is bad attention. “Hey you almost jammed my fingers!”
Startled as Taehyung might have been, his focus is quickly shifted to other things. His wide eyes scan Jungkook’s panting form, taking in the clothes clinging to him like a second skin and the beet red colour of his face and ears. It’s not hard to put two and two together, but what comes out of his mouth isn’t exactly the most pressing thing he wants to ask, “Jungkook, why are you wearing the female cheer leading uniform I gave you?”
There’s a somewhat crazed look that makes itself known in the youngest’s eyes. “AHA!” he throws a finger in Taehyungs face, accusing. “So you ADMIT it’s a female uniform! Taehyung, you ass, how could you!”
Taehyung’s face is a question mark and Jimin squints, confused and still huffy about nearly losing his fingers and his triple-shot iced caramel latte that he may or may not have charmed the barista into gifting him for free. He wants to know what is going on and he wants to know NOW, damn it!
“What are you on about?” he asks, wrinkling his nose as he takes his drink into hand to prevent any future risk of spillage. “Why do you look like that time you ran the half-marathon on a dare?”
Jungkook glares at him, but it’s about as effective as it would be coming from a puppy. “Be quiet and sip your drink,” he says boldly, still attempting to get his breathing under control. Jimin considers throwing a retort back but ultimately decides against, it, shrugging and doing just that. He doesn’t want it getting warm, after all.  
“Uh, yeah,” Taehyung says, sounding like he is a split second away from tacking on ‘duh’ at the end. “You asked me for a cheerleading uniform? I thought you knew some chick that needed a spare, I didn’t know you wanted one to wear.”
At Jungkook’s dumbfounded expression, Taehyung takes the liberty of continuing. “I mean, not that there’s anything wrong with it? You look surprisingly hot in a skirt, your ass looks fine as hell. But you seem kind of angry so IN MY DEFENSE, how was I supposed to know? That you wanted a male uniform? You never specified so—”
While each word that came out of Taehyung’s mouth just seemed to rile him up more, a different look passes over Jungkook’s features at that comment. “Wait, my ass looks good?” He straightens, attempting to peer over his own shoulder to catch a glimpse. “I wonder if she… No!”
He shakes his head suddenly to clear those thoughts and get back on track, whipping that same accusing finger in Taehyung’s face once more and levelling him with a renewed glare. 
“Because of you, I just had the most humiliating experience of my life, and it was all in front of you-know-who!” His voice starts strong, but as he continues it shrinks to more of an angry whisper, his brows scrunched in a clear display of his displeasure. “I literally am about to commit seppuku.”
“Weeb,” Jimin utters at the same time as Taehyung asks, “y/n?” Jimin’s head whips up at the keyword. 
Jungkook’s fight has all but left him at this point, and he pulls out one of the metal chairs to slump in it, defeatedly. His ears are turning crimson again as he recalls the events that had traumatised him so, and he slams his head to the table with a groan, muttering to himself in a voice that sounds dangerously like a sob.
“—stupid, was so stupid of me. I never should have asked Seokjin-hyung for advice. For actually listening I deserve nothing short of death. I’m so embarrassed I’m gonna throw myself into the lake.”
“Don’t throw yourself in there, think of the fishes—” Taehyung says at the same time as Jimin squawks, “WHAT?! You got advice from Seokjin?! He knows who your crush is? Oh my god, you’re more stupid than I thought…”
It’s all Jungkook can do to simply rest his head on the grubby-feeling table, eyes unfocused as he stares into the distance and regrets almost every single decision he has made in his waking life. 
FOUR DAYS EARLIER
“My roommate,” Seokjin says, in between gratuitous sips of his monstrously sugary drink. “I think I’m almost about to get him to crack.”
“I feel bad for him,” you say, not looking up from your laptop despite the urge to gorge on your own drink. You made a goal not to look like a goblin when you woke up this morning and sipping your drink at a reasonable pace is a good start. “Being stuck in close quarters with you all the time. No doubt he needs therapy by now.”
As expected, Seokjin ignores you. You wonder if this is how he has managed not to get usurped as leader of the Contemporary Poetry Performance Club.
(To condense a very long story— he didn’t take being kicked out of the Drama Club very well. That’s on him though, he probably shouldn’t have called the Club Leader a tasteless fool for ordering a salad with his Happy Meal instead of nuggets. But, you digress.)
“I think I’m getting close these days,” the male muses, not-so-subtly making a reach for the McDonalds apple pie you have resting on the table next to your laptop. You smack his hand away without so much as a blink, more than used to having to defend any and all food from his wandering hands by this point. He continues, unaffected by the rebuttal, “Like, really close. It’s not long before my unrelenting bastardous antics wear him down and he finally breaks, spilling all his deepest secrets and confessing his long-time crush on me, thus allowing me to bring this act of friends-to-lovers pining to a close and get to the steamy stuff. “
At his spiel, you finally look at him, sporting a concerned and confused expression, if not somewhat intrigued. “… Are you talking about Jungkook?”
Seokjin chokes on the long sip he’d begun to drag up the straw, indignance making his voice rise. “NO, dumbass, I’m talking about Namjoon! Although…” He pauses only to bring a finger to stroke his chin, like a villain straight from an episode of Lazy Town, “You know, I never thought I’d be one for that harem shit, but now I think about it…”
“Gross,” you groan, wrinkling your nose. Seokjin releases a villainous cackle and you have no choice but to raise your fist in promise. He gets the message and quietens down immediately.
“No, but speaking of that little twerp,” Seokjin quickly starts up again, placing his drink down on the table. You feel an ounce of regret, knowing that means he’s about to talk for a longer time than you’re ready for. “I’m close to breaking him too.”
“He told you who his crush is?” you ask, brows raising in shock. Seokjin lets out a great sigh like the weight of the world is on his shoulders, making you snort.
“No,” he grumbles, before brightening straight after. “But! I’m getting close. He came to me for advice this morning.”
At his words, you’ve now completely abandoned whatever you were doing on your laptop and are looking at him in disbelief. “You’re lying.”
“Am not!” Seokjin denies, huffy. “He did! He wanted help making his crush fall in love with him, and so of course he came to me, Kim Seokjin, master of the heart and modern-day cupid.”
You pin him with a deadpan look. “Namjoon was out, wasn’t he.”
Seokjin’s glare is all the answer you need. He continues like you hadn’t even spoken in the first place.
“And since he so wisely came to me, of all people, and put his love life in my wise, gentle hands, I gave him the best advice anyone could possibly get.” The way his chest has swelled with pride and he’s looking all-too-pleased with himself doesn’t fill you with a good feeling. “I told him to play it smart, and use his assets.”
At first, you’re confused. “What, like… his cuteness? His endearing personality?”
“NO, dumbass, his assets! His ass! His thighs! His itty-bitty waist!” You think you hear him muttering something like ‘that lucky bitch’ under his breath, but can’t be sure. “Also, don’t think I missed you calling him cute, y/n. I’m filing that shit away for later.”
“I’ll kill you,” you inform him, but the threat has long since lost its impact. He rolls his eyes.
“Shut up, we both already know exactly how 'peggable’ you think he is.” He takes a haughty sip of his drink like he knows he’s right, and you hate that he is. “It’s not the most incriminating thing I have on you.”
You make the strategic decision not to say anything and dig your hole deeper, and Seokjin seems pleased at your silent admit of defeat.
“Anyway,” he says again, smacking the cream on top of his drink down into the liquid with a spoon. There is some fallout, but that’s never stopped him before. “Kid’s dumb as shit but pure of heart. I’m interested to see whether he will actually take my advice.”
“He won’t for sure,” you scoff, returning to your laptop at last. “Anyone who takes your advice is guaranteed to have an empty head and quarter of a brain cell to their name. Jungkook is smarter than that.”
As expected, Seokjin squawks in outrage, and it harmonises with the ambience of dead silence in your corner of the library. He doesn’t let the topic rest for the remainder of the day.    
WEDNESDAY, WEEK FIVE
You think that the day Jungkook first rocked up to cheer practice at the gym a week ago at the same time you were coaching the women’s basketball team, is one firmly burned into your memory for the rest of your life. And, honest to god, you wouldn’t have it any other way.  
Because the boy, in all his slim-waisted, sculpted-ass-and-thighs glory, had rocked up in a cheerleading crop top and skirt.
You have absolutely no idea why he decided to wear that to his first session after joining, but you do know that while the sight of him usually makes you drool, the sight of him in that made your brain cease all higher functioning and you, in essence, became a dog. You almost barked when you saw him, for real.
Even from across the room though, you’d quickly been able to gather that he hadn’t worn it on purpose (somehow), as his face flushed bright crimson and he quickly began to look like he wanted to neck himself in the middle of the gym. Yoongi, another bastard friend of yours who through a series of unfortunate events and regrettable decisions (for him) had become the cheer captain, had been insulted that Jungkook had shown up like that and “hadn’t taken cheer seriously”, and so had given him a punishment. Yoongi said that if he wanted to rock up in a skirt so badly, then for every coming practice he had to wear a skirt again.
Had you not been busy drooling you probably would have felt bad for Jungkook, as you did later when Yoongi filled you in. As it were, in the moment you’d nearly copped a basketball to the face for being so distracted. Regrettably, you’d had to turn away from Jungkook and back to your actual duties: coaching. 
Although with Yoongi being out for your blood, you have had plenty of opportunities in the past week to ogle to your heart’s desire. A real shameful amount, if you’re being honest with yourself.
“Bora!” you call, watching the girl in question halt across the gym. “Fix your footwork or I’m gonna smack you!”
The girl rolls her eyes and turns away, flicking a ponytail of dark hair over her shoulder as she does so, but listens to what you say. The familiar squeak of rubber on gym flooring fills the air as she starts the drill anew. She has a tendency to get lazy and sloppy in her movements if you don’t ride her ass, and she knows it as much as you do.
“How did you even managed to get the coaching position?” Seulgi asks from next to you, her response almost cut off by a loud racket from the cheer side of the gym. It takes all of your willpower not to fall into the trap and look over. “I feel like people like you shouldn’t be in positions of power.”
You don’t even bother arguing with her since she’s technically right and you agree. “Sheer dumb luck,” you tell her, risking a glance to the side if only to give Yoongi the stink eye. “Actually, if you really wanna know, I only went for it because Yoongi wanted it and he did something that really soured my yoghurt and pissed me off. So I applied out of spite. I probably shouldn’t have gotten the job though.”
“Huh,” Seulgi voices, eyes unfocused. “Well you’re not too bad for a fake. The team has actually been improving since you took over.”
“That’s probably because you guys went through coaches so fast for a while that for like, six months you didn’t really have one.”
“Touché.”
The only reason the girl is on the sidelines in the first place is because she’d looked over at the wrong time and caught it just as Jungkook started one of the tumbling routines, getting it almost perfect on the first go and in the process flashing his pert ass to the air and any sorry beholders. He might have been wearing bike shorts under the punishment skirt he was modelling, and he might have traded the crop top for a singlet of reasonable length, but it was still a dangerous, nay lethal sight. You’d looked over at the same time so you knew why and how Seulgi managed to tumble and trip so terribly mid-drill. She rolled her ankle so bad that as she sits next to you right now with ice on it, it looks like there’s an entire boiled egg beneath the surface of her skin. It’s kind of gross but also kind of hard to look away from. 
Back to the topic at hand, there is just something about the sheer athleticism and heaven-blessed ease with which Jungkook backflips and cartwheels across the mat that turns you into a brainless slab of goo. You’re unsurprised that Seulgi got distracted and ended up hurting herself as a result of it.
The afternoon flies by and before you know it, it’s dark outside, and you’ve finished riding the collective women’s basketball team’s ass for the day. As they disperse and leave the gym at a leisurely pace, you collect Seulgi and help her towards the gym locker room to get some fresh ice for her ankle before she journeys to visit the university nurse. 
The cheer squad has just about finished up their own practice, and one by one they begin to filter out of the gym. Yoongi waddles over to where you stand by the door, eyeing Seulgi with a knowing look.
“Got distracted at the wrong time, huh?” He asks, very much already knowing the answer. You give him a dirty look while Seulgi goes bright pink.
Yoongi adjusts the collar of his university sports jacket, puffing his chest out. “That’s our golden boy for ya,” he brags, sounding very much like one of the aunties and old women you find gossiping on the street near the markets. “He was born for cheer. It’s like he’s been tumbling since the day he was born. Probably even came out doing a backflip.”
You want to tell him to stop pulling shit out of his ass, but you can’t bring yourself to say anything when you agree so wholeheartedly. You’re saved from having to summon a response when in the next second, Yoongi gets the urge to turn and catches Jungkook red-handed on his way out of the gym. He seems in a hurry, moving almost like he’s trying to sneak out unnoticed, but halts at the unmistakable sound of Yoongi’s holler when it breaches the air.
“Ah there he is— Jungkook-ah!” Even while calling out, Yoongi somehow still has an indolent, lazy drawl. “Good job today! Also, proud of you for committing to your punishment. Keep it up!”
The poor raven-haired boy had already looked somewhat mortified at being singled out amongst the students exiting the gym, but now as Yoongi finishes speaking and his big doe eyes flick to the side and take in you and Seulgi listening in, his face very suddenly and violently erupts into a blush.
“Th-thanks,” he squeaks, nodding, the tips of his ears darkening to match his face. His eyes are flicking from you to Yoongi in such a way he almost reminds you of a scared rodent. When it becomes clear he has nothing more to say, he turns on his heel and flees in the direction of the locker room. For his sake, you don’t ogle him as he goes. There’s a time and a place, and he seems so embarrassed that you’d feel bad for checking him out right now. 
“… He’s so cute,” Yoongi remarks a few seconds after Jungkook disappears out the door, gaze still trained in the direction he’d left. “No wonder I always look over and see you drooling, y/n.”
You agree with the first part, but honestly… you could have done without that second comment. You give him the stink eye to let him know just that, before tapping Seulgi and readjusting your grip in preparation to walk once more.
“If you’re immune, Min, you’re not human,” Seulgi says, cheeky glint in her eye. Your heart warms—you can always count on her to defend you in the face of life’s meanies.
SATURDAY, WEEK 5
It’s not often you find yourself making the long, arduous trek down the street to the apartment building where Seokjin et al. live, but it does happen on the occasion. If possible, you like to make the journey in the morning or the afternoon, because there is little to no cover on the path that takes you there and the only thing you like less than being in the sun when you don’t have to is sweating.
Still, you make the trek today, even though it’s technically past the point in the morning where you would refuse. The heat starts to come anywhere from 8 to 9 o’clock, even earlier on the stinkier days. Call you lazy, but you stick by your own rules because they work and reduce your suffering considerably. 
Namjoon is one of your project partners in a random elective the two of you chose, and he was meant to give you a part of the assignment he’d been working on yesterday but, of course, forgot it. And then again today, when he was meant to drop it off on his way to work, he forgot it once more. So here you are, walking to his stupid apartment and preparing to break in because it’s due next week and you need his part to finish yours, damn it. 
Thankfully, air conditioning greets you the second you step inside the building and cools down whatever heat has managed to cling to your form from outside. Luck is on your side—no sweat today, babey! In a slightly better mood now that you’re out of the sun, you follow the path your legs have committed to memory to Namjoon’s apartment. 
Normally you’d rely on someone being home to let you in so you can ransack Namjoon’s room, but in his apologetic text he’d informed you that everyone is out and so with a great, big sigh you’d resigned yourself and dug the lockpicking set you received one Christmas out from under your bed. It’s heavy in your back pocket now as you walk down the hallway of the floor their apartment is on, already feeling like you’ve committed a crime. Before you can even throw yourself into thoughts of which tool would work best on their front door, you catch sight of something you most definitely weren’t expecting. 
There’s someone else in front of the apartment door, jiggling the doorknob and attempting to work it. You don’t know if they realise its locked and are trying their luck anyway, or whether they’ve yet to figure it out, but while their back is turned to you they have provided you with an excellent view.
Broad shoulders with tan skin peaking out from below a muscle singlet and glistening with sweat where their body catches the light. Dark curls are plastered to the back of their neck, arms out and a tattoo sleeve on one leading your gaze down its length. He’s very athletic, you gather of the stranger immediately, and you’re almost drooling at the way his bicep shifts and tenses as he tries the doorknob once more. Your gaze finally frees itself and scans over the rest of him; defined back, tiny waist, nice butt, thick thighs—
Wait. You know that waist. The sight of it bared by a skimpy cheerleading outfit is one you’ve committed to memory.
“Jungkook?” you say, feeling your stomach dip in excitement. Does it always do that when you see him? You can’t remember.
At the sound of your voice and how close it is, the male jumps in fright and lets out a noise eerily close to a squeak. He spins, slamming his back against the door and smacking a hand over his heart.
“Oh my god,” he breathes, eyes closing and head falling back against the door with a thud. The sight is borderline sinful when combined with his damp hair and sweaty form, and your thoughts threaten to take a dangerous route before you reign them in. You smack your libido back in place— down, girl! “y/n, you scared the living shit out of me.”
A moment passes before his eyes snap open and the breath leaves him in a whoosh, and he’s looking at you like a cornered rabbit, cheeks already warming in his fluster. “W-wait, y/n? What… What are you doing here?”
Cute. If you could, you think you’d pack him up and put him in your pocket.  
You ignore his question only for the sake of asking him your own—much less incriminating as a choice. “Are you trying to break into your own apartment, Mister Jungkook?”
Instantly, as you’d almost come to expect at this point, his cheeks flush cutely. 
“Wh- I, uh…” he swallows and clears his throat, rubbing the back of his neck. “No! Kind of? I went for a jog earlier and Namjoon-hyung kind of… uh… he locked me out.”
As he speaks, you’re reminded of how much you actually like his voice. It’s smooth, melodious; even when its shaking slightly from nerves. Why is he nervous? The longer you stand in his presence the more curious you become. You kind of want to tease him a little.
You hum, a smile curling the corners of your lips and one of your brows raising.  “Ah, so he’s scorned both of us, I see. But fear not, little gumdrop!”
He’s staring at you in something akin to flustered bewilderment as you reach behind you and pull out your lockpicking kit, brandishing it like a trophy. “I have the solution!”
“…” He’s stunned into silence, it seems, but you don’t mind. The look on his face right now is super cute—you kind of want to pinch his cheeks. Okay, damn it, you can’t help it—you pinch his cheek and make a short cooing noise as you step past, preparing to help him break into his apartment. At least this way it feels less like a crime and more like a service.
(You sneak a sly look back at Jungkook as you pass him, and your heart squeezes at the sight of his cheeks flushing pink from your teasing action, eyes wide as they follow your form. This boy is gonna kill you one day.)
Usually you have a bit of trouble picking locks (you don’t do it often) but you crack this one surprisingly fast, and before you know it the door is swinging open and you’re letting out a noise of glee.
“Excellent!” you announce, before darting right in to search for what you came for. Namjoon left it conveniently on the dining table, so you dash over and grab the folder and USB before turning around to be on your merry way. 
When you return to the door, Jungkook is still standing there, tattooed hand pressed to the cheek you’d pinched – which are bright red, by the way— and his eyes somewhat dazed.
“See you at practice later, Jungkook!” you say, waving the folder to accentuate the farewell. “Don’t forget the punishment skirt! You look too good in it, it would be a crime to forget it.”
Once you’re done speaking, you turn back the way you’re walking, missing the facial expression that accompanies his flustered sputtering of a goodbye. Your stomach still flips in excitement as you retreat, a skip in your step, and you can’t help but think it wouldn’t be a bad thing if you ended up seeing more of Jungkook outside of practice.
WEDNESDAY, WEEK 6
You’re sitting in the campus sushi place, escaping the midday heat and grabbing something to eat, minding your own business. It is, though, a nice day and you don’t mind sitting back and just admiring it. This changes when a figure suddenly comes bolting towards you from a distance and nearly bowls you and the contents of your sushi container over.
“SEOKJIN!” you exclaim, barely having saved your food from a sudden and unfortunate meet & greet with the floor. You give him a glare strong enough to kill. “What the hell! My karaage chicken!!! Dude you KNOW they only make a certain amount of these per day, you almost made me drop it and I hadn’t even taken a bit yet! Honestly! You—”
“Shut! Shut up!” Seokjin grips you by the shoulders, giving you a shake; it makes your eyes lock-on to his flushed face, his breath coming in pants from his exertion. “Shut up I have something to say and it’s important!”
“Stop shaking me!” you cry, wriggling out of his grip and leaning as far back into your chair as you can to get away from this nutcase. “And what?! You finally slipped up and Namjoon found all the secret letters you write for him when you’re horny?!”
“No, better!” Seokjin makes like he’s going to grab your shoulders again and you smack his hands away. He continues, eyes alight with something akin to glee that makes him look just a little bit crazy. “I finally did it! I found out who that twerp’s crush is! You won’t beli—”
“What?!” you sputter, your gut churning for some reason. Is the sushi you ate off? “He told you? No way he would be stupid enough to tell you—”
“Hey!” the male cries, indignant. “I resent that! Also no, he didn’t technically tell me, but I have people on the inside…”
It takes a moment for you to scan through people in your head before it clicks. You gasp. “You bullied it out of his friends?! Seokjin! Taehyung and Jimin don’t deserve that!”
“I didn’t bully them! They told me of their own accord!” He points a finger at you in retribution. “Albeit, it was by accident, but I digress.”
You’re shaking your head, returning to your sushi and ignoring the odd sensations in your gut. “This is blood information, man. I don’t know if I can sit and be accomplice to—”
“It’s you!” Seokjin blurts, sticking his pink-haired head right in your face. “The twerp has a crush on you! Finally, at least one of my shipping dreams is coming true!”
You’re so shocked by the information literally thrown in your face that you honest to god almost drop your sushi, again. You stare at the male, mouth open, as you flounder to get some order back in your thoughts.
The first thing you think to say is—“What? No way. Your info is dodgy, man.”
“Look, I know you’re sensitive so I try not to say this often, but are you dumb, y/n?” Seokjin stands back now, hand on his hip.  The look he’s giving you isn’t impressed. “It makes so much sense! Why else would he sign up to cheerleading in a skirt to use his assets if it wasn’t on at the same time as whatever his crush does? Honestly, I should have seen it sooner—the way he goes bright pink every time he sees you and his eyes sparkle like an anime girl every time we mention you. I just thought he was scared of girls or had pinkeye or somethin’.”
You kind of want to smack him, but the rest of you is busy attempting to process all the information unloaded on you. Your stomach gives a giddy flip, and you decide it can only mean one thing in the wake of finding out that Jungkook’s mysterious crush is you.
Maybe, just maybe, you like him too.
You’re gonna pursue him. 
THURSDAY, WEEK 7
It seems that Jungkook has heard that his crush on you has been leaked, because you’ve been trying to track him down and confirm it ever since last week and he’s been avoiding you like the plague. You think you see him kicking up dust as he retreats as fast as his legs will take him around hallway corners when he sees you at the other end, you catch glimpses of him across courtyards as he spins and flees in the opposite directions. A part of you wonders whether its because he does indeed have a crush on you and is embarrassed that you know, of whether it’s because he doesn’t have a crush on you and is embarrassed that you might think he does. 
Well, you can’t know until you talk to him and it seems like you won’t be able to talk to him unless you ambush him in the men’s toilets or something. Which, by the way, isn’t something you’re going to do because even though your friends might be crazy, you’re most definitely not. 
It was even to the point that Jungkook missed the first two practices after you found out, and you have no doubt that he would have avoided you by missing even more had Yoongi not threatened him with adding a crop top to his punishment attire should he miss another practice. He’d showed up for the next one but every time he came within five metres of you he blushed and kept his eyes to the ground, fleeing as soon as he can. 
It’s a little bit frustrating, and he’s still cute when he acts all shy, but you really wish you could track him down just so you know whether its true or not.
Perhaps, with time, he’ll grow a little less skittish and let you get close enough to start a conversation. You just have to hold out hope that a moment will come that will allow you to start bridging things back together with the two of you.
FRIDAY, WEEK 7
That moment comes sooner than you expect when, just the next day, you round a corner alongside Seulgi, having just come from the women’s locker rooms, and walk straight into someone. It’s like walking into a brick wall and kind of hurts. You stumble and let out a sound in pained surprise, but manage to stay on your feet for the most part— the joy at that moment of success passes quickly when you become aware of the cool feeling seeping down your thigh and stomach.
Before even looking to see who you walked into, your gaze is directed down to see what was spilt on you— it’s light pink, and the sugary sweet scent that brushes your nose and sticky sensation that begins to make itself known on your skin are something you recognise instantly.
Strawberry milk.
You look up in something akin to horror, but the expression all but falls from your face when you see who the culprit is.
Jungkook stands there looking very much like a deer caught in headlights, drink carton crumpled and empty in his hand now that its contents are all over your front. As you gaze at him you watch the tip of his ears turn bright red, eyes wide and so unguarded you swear you can see the thoughts whipping through his mind beyond them. You also see the instant regret and mortification that washes over his boyish features as he realises what has just happened and who he has spilt his drink on.
“y-y/n—” he stutters, voice caught in his throat. Whatever he was planning on saying is quickly overpowered by an obnoxious voice from his side.
You hadn’t even noticed Yoongi was walking alongside Jungkook until you hear him speak, “Wow, you know what you were coming around that corner so hard and fast that this is on you, y/n.”
When Yoongi first started talking, Jungkook had seemed relieved, but now a sense of panic has taken over his features. 
“N-no! I am so sorry! This was my fault, I shouldn’t have had it open when I couldn’t even drink it yet. I just really like strawberry milk, and…” He’s so endearingly remorseful as he speaks, big puppy eyes looking apologetically into your own like he’s searching for any hint of forgiveness there to spare.
For a moment you’re absolutely blindsided by the way he just made your heart squeeze in your chest with how damn cute he is, but you recover just in time to catch it as the shocked expression on Yoongi’s face melds into something devious and fitting for his bastardly title.
“Right, he’s right, totally our bad,” Yoongi says, doing a complete 180 and bewildering both you and Seulgi beside you. “Wow, look at your pants, totally soaked through man. Here, come with me— it’s only fair we help grab you something to change into.”
“What—” you don’t get to finish before the cat-faced bastard grabs you by the arm and begins dragging you down the hall in the direction you came from. Seulgi and Jungkook remain in place, stunned by the turn in events. 
“Jungkook, head to practice and get them started! I want some pyramid practice, and then some tumbling from you and the others. Chop chop!” — is all Yoongi throws over his shoulder in dismissal, dragging you where you now realise is one of the other locker rooms. You gape at him as he walks straight up to the one that has been locked for months and opens it with a key.
Catching your expression, he shrugs. “Sometimes you just need a place of your own to hoard things.”
You don’t understand what he’s talking about until you step in and see a table in the corner near the doorway piled high with first aid supplies, twiggy sticks and energy drinks. Your bewildered subsequent scan of the room for more treasured objects is cut short when a lump of clothing smacks you in the face.
You just barely manage to fumble it into your grasp, unable to swallow your groan when you see what it is from the pattern alone.
“It’s the only thing spare,” Yoongi says, radiating true goblin energy. You don’t trust him as far as you can throw him right now but you don’t know where to look to disprove him. “Try not to get my cheerleaders too worked up.”
You have an inkling as to why he’s done this from his words, but can’t confirm it right now. You huff, moving off to one of the stalls. 
“If people get flashed, that’s on you.”
Ten minutes later sees you back in the open gymnasium with cool air brushing your legs that usually only get to see the light of day through rips in your jeans. You set your team to their tasks and drills already, so now you’re left alone with your thoughts. You know for sure now why Yoongi made you change into the cheerleading skirt.
Because ever since you walked out in it and nearly made him fall flat on his face in shock, Jungkook hasn’t been able to keep the blush off his cheeks or his eyes away from you for more than a few minutes at a time. You feel slightly empowered, contrary to how you thought the dangerously short piece of clothing was going to make you feel. 
You have a nice body, you’re comfortable admitting it, and the way that your unplanned flaunting of it seems to be affecting Jungkook… well it’s a nice stroke of the ego, you won’t lie, but it also makes your stomach flip giddily. God, you want him. You’ve always thought he was cute but ever since he joined cheer and rocked up in that skirt like a sweet, hot fool, it was over for you. He’s so… ugh.
Trucking through the practice of your team is, for once, a struggle. It’s so hard not to look over every few seconds to catch Jungkook when you can feel his gaze on you, and you know that once you give in you won’t be able to help being distracted afterwards. It’s a miracle you get through to the end of it while remaining sane. 
As your practice wraps up for the day, you allow yourself a glimpse to the side at last. What you see is a sweaty, panting Jungkook, the muscles of his arms straining as he holds up a brunette you vaguely recall as Tzuyu above his head. Wow, you’re actually a little startled at how much arousal just washed through you— is this normal? Maybe you’re more whipped than you thought. You don’t know.
What you do know, however, is that you want that boy, and right now especially you want to mess with him. Call it a con of being around such bastardous friends all the time, but you’re really feeling the urge. You barely manage to hold yourself back, marvelling at the animal he seems to reduce you to with just a flex of his bicep.
The practice for your basketball team finishes before cheerleading; Yoongi is a ruthless coach and relentless when it comes to formations and perfecting routines. More often than not their practices end long after yours. As your girls begin to filter out of the gymnasium, the cheer squad are still going. You make to follow after, but your name is called from the other side of the gym by a voice you recognise but know instantly shouldn’t be here. 
“y/n! Come here! Don’t ignore me!” Seokjin is the fiend in question, hollering at such an unmistakable frequency that you couldn’t ignore it if you tried. It’s like he’s followed in the footsteps of cats and has pinpointed the exact frequency that a baby’s cry is at, and is now using it to his advantage. You turn, wary, and see him waving like a dumbass. “Come here! Don’t make me pspspsps!”
Now annoyed, you stomp over if only so you can get within beating range. As soon as you reach a few feet away he ducks behind Yoongi though, so you don’t get to follow through on your caveman instincts to beat him over the head with a rock.
“What?” you ask, giving him a stinky look. “Are you like, stalking me or something? Why are you so obsessed with me?”
You can tell he wants to laugh, but his instinct to rile you up overpowers the humour of what you said. “You think you’re worth stalking? I don’t need to stalk you to know that your day consists almost entirely of eating, shitting, and staring at a certain ass.”
Well, he has you there. You shrug, “I’m a simple girl.”
Seokjin is momentarily bewildered that you didn’t rise to his bait and Yoongi chokes on his laughter beside you, the sound coming out squeaky. You’re glad someone is laughing, it makes your dick hard when people find you funny. Again, you’re a simple girl.
“Nice outfit, by the way,” Seokjin says. Apparently it doesn’t take him long to recover, and he’s already shifted topics. 
Yoongi, who had broken away to guide his team for a moment, chimes back in at the taller male’s comment. “It’s all apart of the keikaku, man. Everything is going perfectly. My golden boy is almost too fun to torment. I’ve tasted power and now I don’t know how to stop.”
“Who?” Seokjin asks, more out of habit than anything, before looking over to Yoongi’s minions and letting out a sound of realisation. “Ahh… Mister Jungkook.”
You swear you see the male in question, who is waiting his turn to begin the tumbling routine Yoongi has changed them onto, stiffen. You’re not sure whether it is a trick of the light or not, though, because in the next second he’s shuffling forward to second in line, juggling his weight from foot to foot with restless energy. His eyes are trained on his teammates flipping across the matts. 
“So you know too? y/n, you big-mouthed whore!” Seokjin exclaims, pinning you with an exaggerated look of scandal. Jungkook trips slightly in his step as he moves to the front of the line, barely a few metres away.
You don’t bother defending yourself, since Yoongi speaks before you can anyway. “That y/n likes Jungkook and has wanted to peg his cute ass since forever? Yeah, I know.”
The timing of Yoongi’s response is truly unfortunate. As he started speaking, Jungkook began his run up— and it seems that whatever snippet he heard as he started were enough to throw him off completely. He goes into the front flip kind of wonky, and you have a feeling of dread creep up as you watch him.
He doesn’t do the mid-air turns he is meant to, and instead goes to land after just one flip— the timing is off, though, and your breath hisses through your teeth and you physically cringe as you watch his ankle roll upon landing. 
“Ah SHIT!” he yelps, quickly dropping to the mat and removing pressure from his foot. You feel frozen as you watch, a large number of his teammates running over and asking him if he’s okay.
“Oh feck,” Yoongi says, checking his watch as he mutters to himself. “Shit. Okay we need to practice and only have the gym for another forty-five minutes, but he needs that looked at asap. Who…”
Barely a split-second passes before he’s looking right at you imploringly, with an inappropriately devious glint in the back of his eyes. 
“y/n, you’re free and you have first aid training right? Can you take him to get that wrapped and iced up?” He’s not even done asking you before he’s pushing you in the direction of the male currently curled on the floor. “That room should still be open— I forgot to lock it earlier.”
“Wait, I actually have—” you’re about to let him know about the mountain of schoolwork you have to catch up on, but of course he’s not having any of it. He’s already barking at his squad.
“Okay, everyone, back off and back to tumbling! y/n here will take care of our golden boy, we have the gym for the next forty-five minutes and we’re gonna make the most of it, damn it!”
Yoongi abandons you at Jungkook’s side, and at his command the rest of the cheerleader begrudgingly disperse— you think you catch a few of the female ones giving you the stink eye at their lost opportunity, and you know it shouldn’t stroke your ego but still it does. 
“I guess this is how the Kookie crumbled, huh,” you say, embarrassed that he could have heard all of what Yoongi said and attempting to cope using the classic— humour. 
Jungkook, who had turned his wide eyes and red face to you the second you started talking, now seems to be blushing harder. Evidently, for a number of reasons, he is mortified. It’s like he’s trying to hide behind the long curls that have fallen into his face. Needless to say, it’s not successful, and now both of you are embarrassed. One of you needs to take the lead.
But right now neither of you are wearing the pants.
“Alright, let’s get that looked at,” you say, wincing as you look at his ankle already beginning to swell. “Arms up.”
He obeys instantly and without question, and you’re torn between the primal powers within you wanting to both cuddle him and to drop your panties then and there. 
Getting Jungkook to a standing position while he can only use one leg is harder than you could have imagined, but you know that there’s no way you would have been able to lift him had he not helped you carry his weight. Once he’s upright and his arm is around your shoulder (still panting slightly and glistening with sweat, as you’re trying not to think about) you begin the arduous journey to the locker room Yoongi showed you earlier. 
Jungkook doesn’t really say anything during the trip there, and neither do you— except he has an excuse, considering he’s probably in a fair bit of pain right now. You don’t have an excuse, except that you’re trying desperately not to think about how you can feel each hard line of his body against you right now. It’s a whole-brain engaging kind of activity.
Thankfully, the room is unlocked as Yoongi said, and you grab a towel to lay across one of the cleaner looking benches on the far side of the room— just because its cleaner than the others doesn’t mean it’s clean, per se. You smile when you see Jungkook’s thankful expression.
“Right,” you say, staying in front of where he’s sitting for a moment as you shake your arms out; the boy really is just all muscle, honestly. “Pop your ankle up on the bench, and I’ll grab some ice and stuff to wrap it.”
Jungkook nods, obeying wordlessly. His cheeks still are tainted the slightest pink, and he’s making a point to avoid meeting your gaze. Fighting a smile, you move to Yoongi’s stash and grab what you need, spotting some high-end painkillers and immediately adding them to the pile in your arms.
When you return to his side, you seat yourself on the bench beside his leg— thankfully, they’re wide enough that neither your butt nor Jungkook’s leg has to be sacrificed for the fit. You go through the motions with him, poking and prodding and bending to assess the damage; it’s just a bad sprain, but damn if each watery look he gets at the pain doesn’t make you want to coddle him to death. 
Surprisingly, he’s still silent as you go about icing and wrapping his ankle. You contemplated filling the silence but you’re not good at chit chat or small talk, so refrain and settle for humming softly instead. Considering the rollercoaster of feelings he’s spun you through today, you’re almost disappointed that a wrap on his ankle is all that’s going to come of this. 
Which is stupid, of course. You know. You digress.
You’re still somewhat disappointed as you finish up, popping the excess bandage back in its container. “Okay! You’ll need to…”
You make the mistake of meeting his gaze, and for once he doesn’t shy away from it— there’s something about them, the endless chocolate depths and the doe-eyed look, that completely disarms you for a moment. Blinking, it takes all your might to stop yourself from studying as you continue. “Ahem, uh… you’ll need to keep it elevated, when possible. Compressing it is ideal. Also, for swelling, ice it for 20-30 minutes every 2-3 hours for the first day or so…”
He blinks up at you, and you smile. “Any questions?”
Something intriguing crosses his gaze and he bites his lip, flushing slightly. Oh, he is doing a number on your willpower. You need to get out of here.
“Yeah, uh…” He clears his throat, continuing straight away. You watch even more colour rush to his cheeks, his Adam’s apple bobbing nervously. “About earlier… when I stacked it… Was what Yoongi said true?”
Well. You were not… expecting that. For a moment you’re stunned into silence, self control hanging by a thread. “What… Yoongi said?”
Jungkook gives you a look like he can’t believe you’re making him say it. “That you, um…”
Humiliated but deciding to face it head on, you ask him with your own cheeks heating, “Are you asking about the pegging or the, uh… the liking you part?”
To your surprise, Jungkook chokes and stiffens in place, eyes shooting wide and face and ears going beet red. “I, um… I only heard the liking part…”
OH. Well. You kind of want to die, but… at least now he knows?
 …You’re gonna throw yourself off a bridge.
He must mistake the cause of your silence for something else, because he seems to panic. “B-because, um, I know you know how I feel, and it’s okay if you don’t um— I was just wondering—”
In the midst of his spiel, you take a seat on the bench, closer to him than you were last time. It only makes him grow more flustered before you press a finger to his lips to shush him. He gets the message and falls silent instantly, making your heart skip a beat at his ready obedience. God, are you an animal?! Really?!
“I was trying to track you down to confirm it, you know,” you say, shoving your embarrassment into a box in the far reaches of your mind. Time to swallow your pride.  “But you kept avoiding me.”
Jungkook’s eyes are still wide. “Oh… sorry.”
You smile at his soft, uttered apology. Testingly, tentatively, you shift your hand and rest it on his hip. His whole body stiffens once more, but its more in surprise than discomfort. “What would you do if it was true, hm?”
Like a deer caught in headlights, he’s momentarily speechless. When your thumb rubs against the hard line of his hip bone, drawing a shudder, he jerks back into motion.
“Oh my god, you—” he’s dazed before he narrows his eyes at you, voice dropping to a whisper that’s somewhat tinged with hurt. “Are you teasing me?”
You manage to hold back the laugh but can’t help the smile that rises at his words. “I always get the urge to tease you, Jungkook, but it’s not to be cruel.” You lean forward, holding his gaze. “I probably never grew out of that kindergarten stage.”
It takes a second for what you said to sink in. The way that hope enters his eyes is so cute that you’re humiliated at the urge to squeal that rises. “So, you…”
It’s embarrassing to say the words out loud, especially considering the filth running through your mind right now, and you can’t quite bring yourself to. Teasingly, you bring your other hand to his thigh, brushing the edge of the skirt with your thumb and enjoying the way he shivers. “It’s embarrassing to say out loud, so if you want to hear it, you’re gonna have to work for it.” 
The soft, excited gasp he lets out emboldens you to carry out your next action— you move the hand on his hip, brushing your fingertips up the side of his slim waist before bringing them back down to rest over his crotch. 
To your complete and utter surprise, there is already some firmness there that greets you. At your curious gaze, he flushes pink.
“It’s the skirt,” he confesses, averting his gaze to your lap for the briefest second. “You look really good in it…”
Not that your ego needs more stroking, but you’re happy to let it happen anyway. You hum, beginning to move your hand— he stifles a gasp.
“I know,” you say, grinning. It’s ridiculous how your stomach flips, arousal beginning to trickle into your abdomen and ache in the apex of your thighs. “I could feel you looking at me. I caught you a few times, too.”
He’s embarrassed, you can tell, but the current situation doesn’t leave much room for dignity as it is anyway. Still, you can’t help but tease him some more, voice soft as you rub over his growing bulge and lean closer. “Do you always look at me, Jungkook?”
He squirms, a gasp slipping out before he attempts to send you a glare. “This is embarrassing,” he whines. You raise a brow, increasing the pressure of your hand, and he is quick to amend his response in a whisper, “…Yes.”
“And what do you imagine, when you look at me?” you ask, unable to deny the thrill running through your veins and lighting heat in your abdomen. You pause your ministrations only to move your hand to the top of his skirt and slip beneath the material. This time a moan slips out before he can stop it. “Is it things like this?”
He lets his head fall back against the wall, looking at you through hazy, lidded eyes. “Yes,” he admits, and for how readily he supplied the answer you reward him by slipping your hand beneath the rest of the layers over his hips and wrapping your fingers around his hardening length.
He whines— actually whines— and rolls his hips into your hand, thick thigh tensing beneath the grip of your other hand. The resulting wash of arousal that floods over you is so sudden it almost makes you dizzy.
“Oh, you’re a good boy,” you mutter it without much thought, but surprise filters through you when you feel his length twitch and flush with heat in your hold at the words. Ah— he likes a bit of praise, does he? You slide your free hand up his thigh, working the waistband of his skirt and bike shorts down until they rest just past the beginning of his thighs. It’s like you’re looking at a work of art, you marvel slightly— the curls that begin to trail down a little below his belly button, the sculpted line of his hip bones and the hints of his abs that show as his body tenses. You’re just one woman.
“Does it feel as good as you imagined, Jungkook?” you aimed to speak louder but it comes out sort of breathy. You trail your fingers down the tan skin of his abdomen before gripping the material of his bottoms and using the moment to free his length.
If you didn’t have such a firm grip on it, you know it would have sprung back against his stomach— you try not to let your surprise show, either, because you could feel that he was packing, but seeing it is another thing and your stomach flips in giddy anticipation. Jungkook’s chest heaves as his breath quickens, eyes boring into you and hands bunching in the material of the punishment skirt. You stroke your hand along his length, pressing your thumb along the underside and relishing in the shudder it elicits.
“y/n,” he whines softly, face flushing as his cock twitches in your hold. Whether he’s forgotten you even asked a question or simply is too overwhelmed to answer right now, you don’t know. 
As for how you’re doing— you’re so turned on right now that in all honesty you don’t know what to do with yourself. A solution comes to mind quickly and you don’t have the usual self control you do to stop yourself. 
Mindful of his injured leg, you rise, keeping your grip on him as you do so. His lidded gaze follows you, soft gasps escaping him all the while.
“Give me your leg,” you instruct, relishing how quickly he listens. Presented with his thigh, you swing one of your legs over the other side of the bench and rest on it so that as little weight as possible is on his bad leg, your knees brushing his hips. As soon as you’re lowered, you can’t help but gasp and roll your hips— the only thing separating you and the smooth skin and hard muscle of his thigh is the thin layer of your damp panties, and the stimulation on your clit makes your entire core throb in arousal.
Apparently this is also one of the things he’s imagined, because Jungkook lets out a low, gasping moan and rolls his hips up into your hand— which, of course, makes his thigh muscles tense and shift, rubbing oh so nicely against your clit. You almost fall off from the jolt of pleasure that shoots up your spine, free hand shooting to grab his bicep, “Ah, Jungkook!”
He apparently has the sense of mind to support you by using the arm in your hold to reach and grip your hip. Generous amounts of precum have started to bead at his tip, and you drag your hand up his girth, collecting it on your thumb and smearing it down his length for lubrication. It elicits a whine, another roll of his hips, and like that you settle into a rhythm of sorts.
“y/n.” Each gasp and moan he lets out have to be specially designed to ruin you, you decide. He seeks your gaze with hazy, lust-ridden eyes. “Please kiss me.”
It’s a brazen request coming from him of all people, and you’re all too happy to oblige. You lean forward, the rock of your hips making you shudder, and connect his lips with your own— he’d sought your kiss as you did so, craning his neck forward and awaiting your lips. It’s a heated kiss from the beginning, given the situation— you don’t fight for dominance so much as assume it from the start. Each press of your tongue, graze of your teeth, has a new sound tumbling from his throat and into your mouth. It makes your heart race even harder than it already was.
It doesn’t take long for tension to begin to build in your abdomen, and you know if you’re already feeling it then he must be even closer. Not wanting this to end just yet, you force yourself to slow your hand down, breaking the kiss and shifting to press your mouth to his neck.
“Wh-what—” he gasps, shuddering as your thumb plays with his slit, rhythm slowed to a stop. Both of you are panting, almost, and you suckle a mark into the junction of his neck before pulling back with a grin.
“Surely that isn’t all you’ve imagined, Jungkook.” You lean forward, pressing a brief kiss to his mouth before pulling back— the way he chases your lips makes your heart squeeze. “What now? Be a good boy, tell me.”
Far from being embarrassed at this point and all but a slave to the haze of lust in the air, Jungkook’s breath hitches and he responds, somewhat tentative if anything, “… ride me.”
“Good boy,” you breathe, offering him a proud smile. He preens beneath your fond look.
You shift, and you think that he must have expected you to stand up fully and remove your clothes, or at least your bottoms, but to his surprise you simply shuffle up and reach beneath your skirt, slipping your panties aside and aligning his member with your entrance. You’re so turned on that you’ve soaked through your underwear, and you know you’ve smeared enough precum along his length that lubrication will be no problem. So you simply lower yourself down until his head parts your lips and begins to sink into you.
At the sheer size of him even as just the tip enters your cunt, you have to halt, gasping, “Fuck!”
If he wanted to respond, you don’t really give him time to; as soon as you get your bearings you continue sinking down onto him. There is a slight burn, of course, but you’re so turned on that it fades quicker than you can register. The sensation of him, the throb, his girth and the way he splits your walls, stretching you more and more as you seat yourself on him— it’s indescribable, and all you can offer is that it feels so good you swear tears are gonna prick at your eyes. From the look on his face, brows scrunched and mouth parted as a long, low groan slips out, you know it must feel just as good for him.
When the back of your thighs press against the top of his his and he’s fully sheathed in you, you feel like you’re about to lose your mind— this position has him so deep in your pussy that with each miniscule shift the tip of his cock presses against a spot that sends delicious jolts of pleasure up your spine. Honestly, if you weren’t so intent on seeing this through, you think you could cum from that sensation alone. 
Even as you’re in a mess of pleasure and a haze of desire, you can’t help but tease him some more. You clench your insides, rolling your hips— the sharp, lilting moan he lets out makes your stomach flip. “What now, baby boy?”
You hold his hips down with your hand, feeling them twitch with the urge to rock up into you. A long, drawn groan escapes him. “Do you want to see me? More of me? Or do you want to feel me?”
You take his hand into your hold and guide it up to your chest, slipping it beneath your shirt and bra to cup your breast. His breath hitches, lashes fluttering against his cheekbones as he blinks and attempts to clear the haze from his vision. You relish in the control you have over him until his thumb brushes your nipple and he pinches it, tweaking it instinctively. A moan tears from you, the shock of pleasure that results making you clench around him again; his free hand scrambles for purchase against your thigh, fingers digging in as pleasure washes over him in turn.
Your breath is coming a little faster now. Leaving his hand at your chest, you move it to drag up his neck before threading your fingers in the damp curls at the back of his neck. Finding a firm grip, you tug his head back ever so lightly— it elicits a new moan that you haven’t heard yet, and you really begin to think this boy will be your undoing. 
“What do you want?” you ask again, rolling your hips once more. It isn’t fair of you, you know, since you can hardly think yourself from the sensations. “You want me to move, baby boy?”
He nods, attempting to speak through the moan caught in his throat. “Please… fuck me, y/n.”
Well, who are you to say no to that?
Happy to oblige, you engage your thighs and begin to rise— the sensation of him dragging against your walls makes both of you gasp, and you almost falter in your movements from the feeling alone. Gathering your wits as best as you can, you continue your movements, successfully rising and then seating yourself once more. Unable to withhold much longer, you roll your hips and begin to set the two of you into a rhythm.
You stopped paying heed to the noises escaping you a while ago, but you don’t doubt that the sinful sounds tumbling from Jungkook’s mouth as you ride him are a large contributor to the way the tension in your abdomen quickly begins to knot and bundle once more.
Even with as heavenly as it feels, it’s hard to keep up momentum when your thighs begin to burn. Thankfully, Jungkook has more than enough stamina in his thigh muscles for the both of you, and when he senses your fatigue, he brings his grip to your hips to hold them in place before rocking his own up and beginning to fuck up into you.
Needless to say, the pace he sets is much faster and much harder than the one you had. Swears tumble softly from your mouth at the change in intensity of pleasure as it shoots through you, orgasm already approaching much faster than anticipated. Your hands come to grip his on your hips with a cry of his name, knees turning to jelly. 
Movement against your hand surprises you, but not as much as the sensation of Jungkook’s hand shifting to thread his fingers with yours. You honestly feel your heart burst, and as he fucks up into you that bit harder you can’t help the way you clutch his hand like a lifeline, the sweet moment quick to pass but most definitely not forgotten. 
“G-gonna cum,” you gasp, eyes closing and allowing the slap of skin and Jungkook’s gasping moans to overtake your senses. You don’t forget to indulge him in some praise. “Such a g-good boy, making me feel so g-good.”
He whines at your words, and right as your pleasure approaches its peak you feel his hips stutter and slam up into yours harder than all the times before. The stimulation of that spot deep inside of you is all that’s needed to push you into the throes of your orgasm, and it washes over you more intensely than you’ve ever felt before as you clench and tense with a cry of his name.
Distantly, you feel his own grip on you tighten, and his hips still as they’re pressed against yours. Warmth floods your core, cock throbbing as he empties inside you, and you swear you hear the softest of confessions uttered to the air as he joins you in your high.
He comes down before you do, although you’re not far behind him, and for a moment you sit in place, panting and attempting to come back to your senses. He’s softened inside you slightly, but when you shift and clench on instinct as you do so, feeling cum slide down your thighs, he twitches  and throbs inside you.
Taken aback, your gaze whips to him and now that his shame has returned to him, he has the decency to blush. Well, apparently Jeon Jungkook’s stamina really is no joke. Maybe he really was born to be an athlete.
“Greedy. You want more?” There’s a teasing lilt to your voice, and a thrilling mix of fear and excitement dances in his eyes.
“y/n—” he rasps, desperate. You slide off of him, making both of you groan, but return to your previous position on his thigh. He moans as he feels his own cum leak out of you and onto his skin. When your hand comes to wrap around his slick member, he jolts and whines.
“You wanna tell me what you said just before?” you ask, beginning to twist your wrist and stroke his cock ever so slowly. He shakes his head, whether at your question or the overstimulation, you’re not sure— you know it’s probably a bit of both though, considering he twitches in your hold.
“‘S embarrassing,” he murmurs, back arching as you increase your pace just a little. “Ah, y/n!”
“I see. You know, I think I can get you to cum again,” you say, changing tactics. 
Jungkook shakes his head, strands of his raven hair plastered to his forehead in sweat. “I can’t—”
“You should tell me,” you say, teasing lilt to your tone. He whines, rocking his hips into and then away from the sensations. 
When he shakes his head again, letting it fall back against the wall and baring the column of his throat to you, you jump on his acceptance of the situation. You pick up speed, rolling your wrist and moving in tune with the shifting of his body. It doesn’t take very long before his oversensitivity throws him into another orgasm, stronger than the last but dryer. The few beads of cum that escape seem ever so tantalising as they roll down his length, drawing your gaze.
“You gonna tell me now?” you ask, already knowing the answer. Jungkook slumps against the wall, breathing heavy and sweat glistening on his golden skin. He looks at you through heavily lidded eyes.
“It’s still embarrassing,” he whines, breathy in his exertion.
Right, well. You know what he said, but you want to hear him say it with his own mouth once more and you’ll stay here all night to make that happen if you need to.
Of course, it’s not until a while and another heated moment or two later that Jungkook realises this and gives in.
His confession is so much sweeter on your ears the second time, and of course, as promised, you reward him with your own. It’s worth it for the way it makes his eyes shine, you think. 
Jeon Jungkook really has you well and truly whipped. 
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a/n: thank u for reading and i hope u liked it! im super excited to have completed my first commission and would really appreciate it if u let me know what u think by sending me an ask and liking & rbing this with ur thoughts!! i read & appreciate everything!! thank u !! love u !! peace out !! :D
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novanekoma · 4 years ago
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late nights ☾ bokuto kōtarō
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title: late nights
summary: With practice running late for Bokuto, and your uni classes piling on the workload, late nights seem to be common for the two of you, but as it turns out, late nights aren’t so bad with Bokuto by your side.
status: Completed
genre: sugary sweet fluff, college au, some smut towards the end
warnings: it’s soft and sweet, with adorable boyfie Bo, mostly sfw, but the end does get a bit spicy (oral fem receiving)
word count: 3.3k
disclaimer: I do not own haikyuu, any characters, or anything at all really
A/N- I’ve just been itching to write some Bokuto! [please wrap my thirsty ass in those beefy arms, I love him so much] Yeah, so this came out longer and a little spicer than I originally intended, but I hope you enjoy if you decide to read! Please be kind, I haven’t written in a very long time (especially smut), and I’m a little nervous posting this 🥺
Crossposted on AO3 under the same title and username!
Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy! <3
☾   ☾   ☾   ☾   ☾   ☾
    A loud groan escaped your lips as your head slammed onto the table. Another groan coming out from that action, but even the dull pain on your forehead was a welcomed distraction. You had been staring at the blank word document in front of you for over an hour, despite the countless amounts of research you’d done for this paper, you were having such a hard time cranking it out. Lifting your head from the table, a pout formed on your lips and another frustrated groan slipped through when you checked the time; you had one day left for this paper, and you needed to get something done tonight so that tomorrow you weren’t scrambling to get it done an hour before its due. Not that, that was a common thing you did. (Yes it was)
          Bzzt, bzzt...
          You thanked whatever deity for the welcomed distraction and attempted to find your phone amongst the notes and textbooks littered on the kitchen table. Once the device was in your hands, a huge grin lit up across your face when you saw who had messaged you.
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          You laughed at the last part of the message, even over text Bokuto managed to sound like his usual overzealous self. The upcoming match with the Adlers was quickly approaching and Bokuto and the rest of the boys had been working even harder at their practices, and more often than not, they ran longer than usual, just like tonight.
           A dreamy sigh left your lips as your mind went back to your younger days as a Fukurodani manager. Bokuto had always been a hard worker, even during high school where you met, the boy had a work ethic (for volleyball) like no other. The long nights after school hours as you helped Bokuto and Akaashi with training, and the even longer nights during training camps when Kuroo, Kenma, and eventually Tsukki, were thrown in the mix. The only exception being when he slipped into sad mode. A fond smile settled on your lips as you recalled the countless times Akaashi and the rest of the team had called you into practice in order to get Bokuto out of his slumps, which became one of the reasons why you became a manager in the first place.
          Some sweet words (and many, many kisses) from you was usually all it took for Bokuto to snap out of emo mode and be ready to take on the world again.
          Over the years you eventually learned each of Bokuto’s weaknesses, as Akaashi would call them, and you learned ways to counter them. Speaking of, one thing that always kept Bokuto in a good mood and prevented a morning after sad mode, which tended to happen when he was overtired after having a long day, was having dinner ready for him by the time he came home, even if it needed to be reheated a little bit by the time he got there.
          Abandoning your schoolwork (it’s not like you were going to work on that damned paper anyway), you made your way toward the fridge to see what you had in stock. Another grin coming over your features when you saw some beef sitting in the fridge, your boyfriends favourite. A small laugh bursting from your lips as your mind went back to one training camp in particular, where the coaches surprised the boys with some BBQ for all their hard work and practice, and Bokuto, as most of the boys did, had gone absolutely feral over the food. With drool practically pouring from his mouth as he tried to shove as much meat as possible into said orifice.
          You don’t think there was ever a time you were called over by so many people to control your ravenous boyfriend.
          A happy sigh slipped on your lips, thinking about your adorable (and hot) boyfriend always caused your heart to flutter in your chest and a familiar warmth to spread throughout your body. God, you were so in love with that boy.
         You took the beef out of the fridge, you could whip up a quick beef, rice, and vegetable bowl, Bokuto would like it and- the loud growling of your stomach cut off your train of thought- yeah you could use something to eat too. Any thoughts of your paper flew from your mind as you focused on the task at hand, a little pleased grin tugging onto your lips.
☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾
          A satisfied noise came from your mouth as you leaned back in your chair, patting your now full stomach. The meal had hit the spot, after eating (and making a large pot of coffee) you were able to get a good portion of your paper done. A loud yawn escaped your mouth and you rubbed your tired eyes. All you had left was another 2 paragraphs and the conclusion, you wanted to do one more section before calling it a night since it was getting close to midnight and you were getting pretty tired.  
         Bzzt… Bzzt...
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          A grin lit up your features as you texted Bokuto back, telling him not to worry and that you would be going to bed soon, but his kisses were still waiting for him. Your heart warmed, happy that he was on the way home. Another yawn escaped your lips, one more paragraph then you’d go to bed. You sighed, putting your phone down and facing your laptop, quickly getting to work.
          Or at least trying to anyway, your mind seemed more concerned with taking a little nap right here on your laptop between the textbooks around you. You huffed, bringing your hands up to slap the sides of your cheeks in an attempt to wake up.
          This was going to be another one of those late nights.
☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼
          Bokuto was tired, it had been one of the longest practices of the week, but the late nights were starting to pay off and he could really start to see the changes within his teammates. As quietly as possible, the owl-like man opened the front door to the apartment and closed it just as quietly behind him, his beautiful girlfriend was probably already asleep in bed and he didn’t want to risk waking you up. A quiet groan slipped from his lips as he kicked off his shoes and dropped his bag at the door, he’d clean that up tomorrow. Thankfully he had the morning off and right now all he wanted to do was wrap you in his arms and sleep the rest of the night away.
          His attention was quickly caught by the kitchen light that was still on, had you forgotten to turn it off before bed?
          A soft smile slipped on his face as he walked towards the kitchen, he paused in the doorway, leaning against the side as he crossed his arms over his broad chest. A low chuckle escaping his lips as he took in your sleeping form. You had fallen asleep at the table, one hand still on the keyboard, your head head placed on an outstretched arm as you rested on one of your textbooks. Bokuto bit his lip to stop the laugh that threatened to come out, there was also a highlighter stuck to your cheek.
          As he moved toward you, his attention was slightly distracted by the delicious smell coming from the other side of the table. Leaving you for a moment, he moved towards the covered bowl.
          Enjoy Kou! You worked hard today and I’m so proud of you <3
          His heart was about to explode out of his chest, could you get any cuter? Bokuto was definitely going to be eating that later, but first he needed to take care of his baby.
          Moving back toward you, Bokuto took some quick pictures, immediately making one his home screen, before he softly whisked you into his arms bridal style, trying his best not to wake you too much.
          “Kou…?” Your sleep-thick voice murmured, bleary eyes opening slightly as he carried you toward your shared bedroom.
          Bokuto hushed you and pressed a light kiss on your forehead, “Go back to sleep baby,” he whispered. An incoherent noise slipping from your lips in response, and your head snuggled deeper into his chest as you curled your body closer to his. A noise, similar to a coo, fell from Bokuto’s lips as he nuzzled you into his chest. You were just the cutest thing on the entire planet and he couldn’t believe how lucky he was to call you his.
          Turning the washroom light on, Bokuto carefully placed you on the counter, his heart twisting at the whine you let out when he let you go.
          “M’tired Kou,” you murmured, your hand moving to rub against your eye.
          It took everything in him to not ravage you right then and there. God, you were so adorable.
          He pressed another kiss onto your forehead, “I know baby, but let me help you get ready for bed, you’re gonna wake up grumpy if you don’t do your routine,” he murmured.
          Deep down you knew he was right, you hated going to bed without washing your face or brushing your teeth.
          “But you just got home,” You murmured, feeling a little more awake, and made grabby motions towards your boyfriend, “I know you must be tired and hungry.” Your actions contradicted your words though as Bokuto grinned and stepped between your thighs, his warm body enveloping yours as your arms wound around his chest. You let out a content sigh as you buried your face in his chest. He must have taken a shower at the gym since he smelled fresh and just like his body wash.
          Moments like these were your absolute favourites, Bokuto’s body was just so… huge, he enveloped every part of you effortlessly. You loved his chest the best, always taking the chance to bury your face or pepper kisses along the toned muscles. Your ear was against his chest, his heart beating a soothing song that was lulling you to sleep, ah falling asleep in that delightful chest was the best thing in the entire world.
          Your legs wrapped around his waist to bring him closer, a rumble of a laugh erupting from his chest as he placed a kiss on the top of your head. A content sigh escaped your mouth and you placed a gentle kiss against his clothed chest, arms slithering under his shirt and locking around him tighter, to bring him closer, if that was even possible.
          “I just want to stay like this forever,” you murmured, eyes peeking open as you tilted your head upwards toward Bokuto, your chin resting on his chest. Your cheeks warmed as you took in his soft expression, even after being together for years, that look of love and adoration was something you would never get used to, the butterflies in your stomach always fluttering rapidly when he did so. You loved the way he could make you feel with one look.
          Bokuto grinned, “You’re beautiful,” he murmured, one arm leaving your form so he could brush the stray hairs from your face, “I’m a pretty lucky guy to get to come home to this.” He sighed in content, leaning down to press a soft kiss against your lips.
          You smiled, “I love you Kou,” you hummed, moving to press your face back into his chest.
          A soft chuckle came from above you, “I love when you say that,” he murmured, “Best phrase ever!” some of his excitement slipping out.
          You grinned, “I,” kiss, “love,” kiss, “you,” you murmured, kissing his chest between each word, your face moving upward until you reached the base of his throat, placed another featherlight kiss there, letting your tongue flicker out against the skin briefly as your nails teasingly ran down his back.
          A strangled sound came from his throat, and you took the opportunity to lazily bring your head upwards again to take a peek at your boyfriend, satisfied to see he looked a little flustered as a dazed look danced through his golden eyes. You could feel his member growing hard at your ministrations as it pressed against you.  
          “I thought you were tired,” he whined accusingly, pressing himself closer to you.
          You let out a little laugh, “Who said I wasn’t?” you teased, your expression one of innocence, even letting a yawn out. Truthfully you were pretty tired, but whenever the chance to tease Bokuto came up, well, you weren’t one to waste such wonderful opportunities.
          Bokuto’s face softened once again, “Your lucky I love you,” your head bobbed in agreement and he sighed dramatically, “Let’s get you ready for bed then, then I’ll go and eat that delicious smelling bowl you made for me.”
          Reaching around you, Bokuto grabbed your toothbrush and prepped it for brushing your teeth, you whined a bit when he pulled back from you, making your legs drop from his waist, but took the toothbrush gratefully. As you did your night time routine, Bokuto also did his. Sleep slowly began to leave your body as Bokuto made you laugh, making funny faces in the mirror as he brushed his teeth, ‘accidentally’ brushing against you in several places as he moved and causing you to squeal when a glob of toothpaste landed on his shirt, narrowly missing you (since he was still in between your legs). And laughing some more at the look on his face when you splashed some water on him.
          “Kou!” You shouted, a laugh bubbling from your chest as you pushed your boyfriend’s face away from you. He decided to help you wash your face, but only succeeded in splashing you back and getting your entire front soaked with water.
          “Oops?” he grinned, not looking sorry at all. His golden eyes filled with mirth, shamelessly tracing your form as your t-shirt clung to your chest.
          God what a view.
          “You will be sorry!” You exclaimed and with a war cry as you hopped off the counter and latched yourself onto Bokuto’s front, wrapping your arms around his neck, your legs going around his waist, successfully pressing your front against his, rubbing against him, and making his shirt just as wet. Bokuto’s hands automatically went to your thighs, supporting your weight and successfully coping a feel where your shorts had ridden up.
          “Now your shirt is just as wet,” you declared, leaning back slightly so you could see an imprint of your front on his, a satisfied grin on your features.
          Bokuto threw his head back with a laugh, “Baby, I hate to break it to you, but this doesn’t feel much like a punishment,” he was smirking now, his face moving back towards you so he could rest his forehead against yours, “Now I’ve got your cute little self, pressed up against me and it makes it even easier for me to do this,” he said, quickly capturing your lips with his. This kiss wasn’t like the soft one from earlier, this was passion filled, rough and absolutely delicious.
           Your eyes fluttered close and you tightened your grip around his neck, your legs squeezing his waist as he kissed you, pushing your front against his, craving the friction as his plush lips took everything you were offering. His tongue swiping against your bottom lip asking for entrance, which you granted quickly and easily.
          Bokuto groaned into your mouth, exploring each wet and warm part of you, your hands tangled themselves in his hair, fingers tangling around his coloured locks just the way he liked, tugging slightly and making him pull away as he quite literally, kissed the breath out of you. Bokuto’s lips didn’t stop as they trailed down your jawline, peppering sweet kisses on every inch of skin he could get too. You threw your head back with a moan as his lips made it to your throat, vaguely aware that he was moving you from the bathroom, but more focused on the fact he found that sensitive spot on your neck and started harshly sucking on the skin there.
          Your grip on his hair tightened and a particularly loud gasp escaped your lips as he harshly bit down on your neck, causing you to writhe in his arms at the sensation of his tongue and lips soothing the bite. With a whine, you tugged his head back and brought his lips back to yours with a bruising kiss, biting on his lower lip the way you knew would drive him crazy.
          A squeal left your lips as his lips suddenly left yours and Bokuto threw you haphazardly onto the bed, your body bouncing a bit from the force. You scrambled into a sitting position, lust taking over your mind as your looked at Bokuto through hooded lids. Your boyfriend was quick to tug his shirt off and almost ripping his shorts in his haste to remove them.
          You giggled and followed suit, taking off your damp shirt and throwing it somewhere behind you, you went for your shorts as well, but before you could, Bokuto pounced. His mouth latched onto yours once more, taking quick control as he roughly guided you down onto the bed. His hands moving to cup your breasts, molding them into his large, rough, hands as he squeezed your perfect mounds. A loud groan was pulled from you as his mouth latched onto a nipple, tugging on the sensitive bud as his hand teased the other, slotting it between his fingers.
          A whine escaped your throat when the two toned man pulled away, “You don’t seem all that tired anymore baby,” Bokuto teased, a large grin forming on his features as he watched you squirm in his grip.
          “Koutaro,” you whined, reaching your hands toward him, fully intending to tug his lips back to you, but a big hand stopped the motion, pinning your arms above your head and causing you to squirm in his grip. Your thighs rubbed together in anticipation, “Need you,” you whimpered, feeling the heat pool in your lower half, you knew your panties had to be soaking by now, his heated look edging you on as you groaned, “Please Kou.”
          Bokuto licked his lips at the sight of you, feeling a burst of pride at the marks beginning to bloom on your skin and the want that was clear in your expression, his eyes flickered to yours, “Well when you plead so prettily, how can I say no?”
          With that familiar smirk on his lips, Bokuto pressed a sering kiss against your mouth before moving his lips towards your neck again, leaving another decent mark in his wake. Your breaths coming out harsh with anticipation as you arched towards him, eyes following the familiar spiked head as he a trailed kisses across your chest, teasing and nipping your skin as he moved down your waist. With one hand, since the other was otherwise occupied in restraining you, he slowly worked your shorts and panties down your legs.
          “Lift your hips baby,” he murmured, pressing a kiss on the inside of your thigh, dangerously close to your dripping cunt. You were quick to comply, and your shorts joined your shirt as Bokuto threw them behind you.
          As he got to the apex of your thighs, he marveled at the pretty pussy that was drooling back at him, with one more grin towards you, he switched between peppering hot open mouthed kisses on your thighs and sucking the delicate skin, slowly moving towards the pretty little cunny that was dripping with slick, his senses being filled with you as he continued his teasing. Never quite reaching the part of you that was craving him the most. He was driving you crazy, a moan was pulled from your mouth as you squirmed in his grasp, the ache between your legs only intensifying when his nose brushed against your center as he moved between thighs.
           “Kou,” you gasped, back arching and eyes fluttering shut as desire clouded your mind, golden eyes peeked up at you, a flash of a smirk and his mouth was finally moving towards your aching cunt, lips wrapping around your sensitive clit and with a harsh suck from him, and a loud squeal from you, you knew you had a long, satisfying, night ahead of you.
© novanekoma 2020
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cloveroctobers · 4 years ago
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GARY RENNELL —
IG info/bio | @/rennellnotreynolds | 300k followers | currently havin a midlife crisis at thee moment so cheers! 🍻🏋🏼‍♂️🤨
23 (24) years old
Born & raised in Chatham, England there’s no other place like it to him. Sure when he went on holiday to the villa, it was quite nice but nothing ever beats home. He genuinely believes that he’s meant to be in this place since it’s all he’s ever known & doesn’t think he’ll live anywhere else
Raised by his nan & is an only child. Was at risk of being placed in foster care until his paternal nan came forth to raise him
His father and nan did not have the best relationship due to the way he chose to live his life and Gary was kept away from his nan until he was about 10 years of age
Does not like to talk about his birth parents due to the trauma, which is why he feels like his nan is his everything. His savior and why she means so much to him
His nan once told him that he favors his mother, Gail. He never had the chance to really know her, but was aware that she was very unhappy with herself &, “chose to be with the stars” just before his 5th birthday
That’s one of the reasons why he finds himself always looking up at the stars, usually when he’s drunk out at the docks by himself, he’ll try to talk to his mom, to know her better
I feel like he’s either a cancer or a Libra?
Update: Cancer sun + libra moon + Taurus rising
Went to uni for a semester and thought about architecture as a profession but ultimately felt like uni was NOT for him and eventually juggled around with jobs until he landed into the crane operator field which he found himself to be great at
For as long as he and his nan can remember, he always loved playing with cars, ships, building Legos, (I’m American idk if this is a thing there too or it’s something different/similar so my apologies lol) and putting things together. He never cared for reading instructions, Gary’s a hands on type of guy/learner and it’s how he best communicates
He likes heights, so this job wasn’t an issue it was just getting through the program for 2-3 years that was a pain in his ass but he was determined + knew this was what he was good at and stuck with it.
It was tiring working 40 sometimes over 40 hrs a week but he’s passionate about his work so he’d never dare change it
Due to this job being a lot physically, he would use muscle cream to help his pain or pay to see a masseuse whenever he could or wasn’t being cheap about it + often buys epsom salt to bathe in 3 or so times a week 
Total penny pincher! I can see him being so, his dad told him all about how to hold onto what he’s got and always look for a bargain but with a gambler for a father, you can only imagine how that worked in his favor
Lives with his nan and doesn’t see an issue with it. His mates definitely tease him about it but know how much the woman means to him but still think it’s a major c*ck block for him but it’s a two for one package deal and anyone who doesn’t understand that doesn’t deserve him
Will probably still live in her house once IF she p*sses
Nan is a big fan of wallpaper and has one room in the flat that has squeaky plastic covering most of her furniture ( she loves furniture shopping) & only takes it off once her lady friends come over with consists of a huge cleaning routine which Gary secretly hates but pushes through it while she plays some old tunes on her jukebox
He finds himself singing those exact songs when he’s getting ready for work and actually enjoys them...but don’t ever tell his mates that!
His nan taught him basic household care & he finds himself scolding his mates for not knowing how to wash their underwear & always taking it to their mum’s or having their girlfriends do it for them
Loves washing clothes on a Sunday in the backyard + hanging them on the clothes line. His nan doesn’t believe in washer machines & makes her own detergent
He’s always down for a rooftop hangout, whether drunk or not. To be up almost as high as the stars is such a feeling or hang out with his mates laughing it up
Occasionally smokes cigarettes when he’s really stressed, he’s not proud of the nasty habit and tries his hardest to hide it from his nan & Lottie but they both know
Is in a on and off again relationship with Lottie. She’s met his nan, they both like each other. And that makes Gary extremely happy
Gary is the laid back one out of the two and Lottie is firey and needs constant reminding from Gary that he wants to be with her whereas Gary feels like that’s something she should already know and he’s told her a couple of times before, he’s sure of it. He doesn’t get why she doesn’t get that
Which results in arguments. Lottie chose to live in England for half of the year and goes back to Australia for the other half. Nan encouraged Lottie to live with the two of them until she decided to get her own place in England, or rather the two of them together. Nan doesn’t believe Gary will leave in fear of her being lonely, which she’s not! By all means, nan keeps busy! But Lottie desperately wants to have her own space with Gary away from nan, even tho she adores the spunky lady.
When they don’t see eye to eye she does what she does best and leaves, which is exhausting to Gary
They’ll go days without speaking until the other cracks. At first it would be Gary but since it’s been a year into their relationship, he’s gotten used to it and let’s her come back to him when she’s ready
He cares for Lottie, he really does. And wants this to work but he just wishes they could be more secure in their relationship.
Was a f*ckboy way back when from 18-20 and rarely there’s his old flings who show up just to cause drama knowing that Gary’s got a new girl in his life that LIVES with him, which Gary dreads that this small town knows his business. He hates confrontation but there’s one thing about Lottie, she’s never going to bite her tongue. So whenever those girls do try it with not only her but Gary she goes off.
Gary is protective too so when those messy girls start shit at the pub, he’s instantly trying to get Lottie away from the issue. Then there’s drinks flying and slap fights happening + hair pulling & they’re getting kicked out of the club/pub or even cops called on them.
“This blows. I thought you said you were trying to be better than this, Lottie.” “Me? What about those slags?! They attack not only me but your character too!” Which adds to a list of the reasons they fight.
Nonetheless they do have their fun moments together, getting drunk by the docks, getting random tattoos, hanging with his friends & their significant others, + going to the theatre
Lottie still thinks this town is very slow-pace, sleepy, cloudy and hardly has sun— which is okay to her some days but other day’s it can be dreadful and much different from her fast-pace life but she finds the little things like spending time with Gary to encourage her to stay
Gary likes playing games when he has his free time, like fortnite, red dead redemption, Final fantasy, & SUPER SMASH BROS & almost always plays with Ibrahim who informs him about new games which makes Lottie want to slam her head against the wall since that can take hours
Keeps in touch with all of the boys in villa and makes sure they have zoom meetings as much as they can because he cares about those boys. Noah tries to schedule them but usually it’s happens at random which annoys him but he gets over it. Gary spent month(s) with them. They’re basically his extended family & that’s saying a lot since he views his home to a high standard and has friends here but they’re nothing like his villa brother’s
Also into woodwork. He didn’t think he’d enjoy it but he likes to do it more when the weather gets crisp and he battles with that over cigarettes to ease his worries in life, then goes and have his daily dose of tea
Finally stopped dying his hair that awful yellow and stuck with it. Marisol was the first to see it, after an accidental FaceTime call which was supposed to be just a regular phone call but whatever? They’d all eventually see it if he EVER decided to post to his IG stories!
She compliments him in Spanish yanking her glasses off leaving him highly confused, “is that good?” “If Lottie doesn’t sit on your— which leaves Gary very wide eyed opposed to his raised brows but Marisol is cut off by Graham clearing his throat
Lottie does indeed like it & shows him how much and later asks his option on what color she should dye her hair next. 3 out of the 13 look the exact same to Gary. But he helps her dye her hair which comes out patchy but there’s no way in hell she’s letting anyone else touch her hair. She’s been doing this all on her own for some time now. Gary’s lucky she even allowed him to help her! So she dyes it back to blonde, all of it, and waits a few weeks to dye it all blue
Gary’s definitely into old boy bands especially LFO & serenades, “girl on tv” to Lottie all the time, likes 98 degrees, Backstreet Boys, *NSYNC, Boys II men, & Dru Hill
As for modern day music, he LOVES to work out to tame impala which never makes sense to his mates but he usually works out the next day after getting shit-faced, he’s also in love with lizzo’s music, laundry day, brockhampton, & rina sawayama
Anthem = mac demarco, “Salad Days”
Celeb crush? Julia Roberts, Salma Hayek, Anne-Marie, Leona Lewis, & Noah Cyrus
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canonicallyanxious · 4 years ago
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not sure if you do anything like this, But what do you think MNC!IsakandEven are doing right now?
oh man anon i have to tell you it’s been ages since i’ve even thought about making new cliches but it’s IMMENSELY COOL there are still people thinking about this fic and these boys!! so bc i was just so irrationally pleased about this ask i dug up some [very old like from 2018 rip] notes of some post-canon hcs i came up with and using those i’m gonna come up with a new list of 2020 appropriate hcs - hope you enjoy them :’]
[side note but this made me realize that 2020 is canonically FOUR YEARS after the end of skam s3 as well as the mnc timeline????? fuck me sdkjfnsdkf]
hmm not sure what the norwegian uni system is like or what quarantine life looks like over there rn but if they’re still in school then Even probably applied to film school after a gap year or two and isak is studying idk compsci or something [for the job security yk]
Even’s friendship with balloon squad still going strong! he’s actually a pretty integral part of their yt channel now, helps them with bts stuff and editing videos and they’re twitch streamers now too so he helps with their stream set up bc none of them [except for maybe mikael] know what the hell they’re doing
mikael made him sit down and do film school apps with him so they probably are going to the same program. Even realized he was into more of the visual storytelling aspect of things so he’s probably leaning more toward cinematography/editing, mikael still on the director track. 
isak is of course subscribed to their channel and comments on all of the videos that Even appear in and Even pins every single comment which baffles the channel’s other subscribers bc it’s always shit like “wow what pretentious hipster came up with this shit” and “congrats on being the token white boy” [”Isak,” Even says, kicking at Isak’s ankle where they’re sprawled all over their couch, “you’re a token white boy too”] and “lol ur ugly” [to which even responds using the hei briskeby account “<3” and everyone is like ??????????????????????????????????]
if they’re still in oslo they probably regularly have lunch with each other’s parents. For holiday get togethers they trade off between Even’s parents’ new flat and Isak’s mom’s house, and whenever Even’s parents come to Isak’s mom’s house there’s always lots of jokes about the house they used to live in like “oh HATE what the new neighbors are doing with OUR YARD” or whatever
they probably moved into a flat together 1 or 2 years ago, idk how expensive rent is in Oslo but as they’re both students i’m gonna say they’re probably in a flatshare of some kind. isak insisted on having his own room so he can have a space to go when he wants to sleep without Even hogging the blankets [still a point of contention between them almost a decade and a half into them knowing each other!] so technically on paper they have their own rooms but let’s be fucking real at this point isak’s room is less his room and more the room that has his X-box
for the first like week [maybe even the first month] their roommates were so very confused as to whether they were actually together or just really really close friends [they’re constantly bickering but also spend all their time together but also spend all their time together playing mario kart????] and isak and even probably like forgot to tell them [like they’ve always been “isak and even” u know and now they’re “isak and even plus bomb ass sex and lots of smooches” but still isak and even but they probably forget people they’ve just met don’t know that] and probably had an ongoing debate about it 
”Even leaves Isak little drawings on the bathroom mirror in the morning, they’re definitely dating!” “Nah man they’re just friends why wouldn’t they share a room if they were together [worth noting at this point they don’t realize isak’s been sneaking into even’s bed basically every night but don’t worry they will eventually]” “okay if they’re not together they’re definitely pining and should get their shit together bc if I have to see Even give Isak another soppy look over breakfast when he’s not looking i’m going to fucking lose it”
Up until the day they’re sitting at the kitchen table and Even is like “okay i’m gonna get some groceries now” and isak leans over the table to give him a peck on the lips and says “kay love you” and their roommates are like “oh???? you two have finally started dating then??????” and Isak frowns and says “we’ve been dating for three years” and Even yells from the other room “BUT ISAK HAS BEEN IN LOVE WITH ME SINCE HE WAS SEVEN” and their roommates’ brains have completely short-circuited
later isak is still frowning like “didn’t we tell them??? i could have sworn we told them” and even is like “do you remember what you said when we first met” and isak is like “i said i’m isak and this is my boy even” and then he’s quiet for a second and he says “oh”
a year or two after that whole mess their roommates cannot believe they ever even doubted but for the most part they’re good roommates and keep the noise levels down so everything is chill [except it’s hard to hang out with them sometimes not because they engage massively in PDA although sometimes they do but because their conversations include so many layers of inside jokes, years and years of them, it’s hard for someone not well versed in the isak-and-even language to follow]
They probably have a dog. maybe two
as of this very second i hope they’re both asleep isn’t it like almost 5 am over there lol
hope this is what you were looking for anon =] thanks for the ask, it was fun to think about these boys again!
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seokiloquy · 4 years ago
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Crashing Into You Pt 2 - Haiba Lev
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AU: Body Swap 
Requested
Tags/Warnings: Dancer! Gender Neutral! Reader
Word Count: 600+
Pt 1 | Pt 2
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Lev could feel it, another bad day creeping around the corner. Unfortunately, he had been plagued with bad days as of late, but at least that didn’t outway his good days. 
This particular bad day started with volleyball practice, which surprised him because volleyball usually stayed as the highlight of his day, that and his daily lunches with (Y/N). 
While he was hooking the net to the pole, he stepped on a stray volleyball and fell, twisting his ankle. And just like that, he was out of volleyball practises for the rest of the week, per Kuroo’s decision. 
“It’s better to rest now,” Kuroo had said. He clapped a hand on Lev’s shoulder. “You don’t want to make it worse by pushing yourself. Tons of athletes push themselves too hard when they have an injury and it just makes it worse.” 
That led him up to here, sitting on the sidelines with his leg elevated watching the practice instead of participating. Kuroo told him that he didn’t have to stay, but Lev insisted. He didn’t want to miss anything, and even if it might not be much, he could still learn despite being on the sidelines. 
Lev rested his against the wall and closed his eyes. 
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A bright light blinded Lev’s eyes. The pain in his ankle faded slowly, but it was still there. That caused him to stumble, but he got up quickly without realizing it. In fact, he was standing up and his arms were stretched out, and his feet glided across the floor in a movement he didn’t know. Another second passed when it clicked that he was in (Y/N)’s body, standing under a bright spotlight in the middle of a stage, in front of a large crowd. 
Shit. 
He let (Y/N)’s body guide his motions, hoping that the momentum of their past movements would lead into the next. He wished that (Y/N)’s muscle memory of the choreography outweighed his own brain’s actions to stop and run off stage. 
Lev pressed his eyes tightly together again, he wouldn’t mess up this performance for (Y/N). 
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Lev caught himself before he tumbled down the last few steps of the stairs. He leaned on his good leg and caught his breath. 
He wasn’t in the gym anymore. He looked around. The stairway he was standing in led to the school auditorium. 
Picking himself up, Lev slowly made his way down the staircase. 
He was almost to the entrance when a crowd came through the doors of the auditorium. The performance was done. He ducked through a side door and followed the path to the back stage. He could hear the rustling behind it.
He knocked. 
Haru opened the door. They were still in their performance clothes and sweat matted their hair to their forehead. Haru glanced at him up and down and turned their head back into the room. “(Y/N)! There’s someone here to see you.” 
(Y/N) stepped through the door and closed it behind them. “This body switching thing is getting kind of annoying.” 
Lev laughed. “You’re telling me. The sheer panic that went through me when I was standing on stage.” 
(Y/N) glanced at his ankle and then their own. “Let’s sit down.” 
Lev nodded and braced himself against the wall, sliding down until he reached the floor. (Y/N) followed suit and stretched out their leg in front of them. “I didn’t know something like pain could transfer with body swapping.” 
Lev cringed. “Does your ankle hurt?” 
(Y/N) smiled. “It’s not your fault.” 
Lev took (Y/N)’s hand and held it tightly. “From what I could tell, your performance was amazing.” 
Throwing their head back with a laugh, (Y/N) said, “Thanks. You would know.” 
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It’s a short one because school is kicking my ass, but there will be better (longer ones) coming your way. 
So…..there is another schedule change. It might be a little difficult to grasp, Bacon and I are still working out the details, but it’s a schedule that’ll work better for me (the struggling uni student)(NOT ME, I'm a lazy 13th year! -Bacon). 
The one shots will be in like tiny bursts. We’ll take a break from posting after next week’s one-shot (for a couple of weeks) and from that we’ll mass write when we can and then we’ll announce/post for a certain amount of time after that depending on how many one-shots we produce. 
Also, that takes into account requests. Requests will stay open, but please know that with this new system your request might be delayed by a lot depending on when we post. (They are anyways). 
With the revamps, they might be posted in the schedule because editing old ones is easier than writing new ones. So, they’ll be a part of the regular posting whenever that is.
Hopefully through this it’ll help us produce better quality one-shots in the time that we write. 
Also, this may or may not be the same for the summer. That depends on whether we have to do things during that time, but it is definitely what’s going to happen during the school year. 
Thank you - Kiwi and Bacon
(PS, I’ll probably continue writing like normal, just not posting right away and working on longer multi-parted stories if I come up with any) -Bacon
Posted: 18/10/2020
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gwoongi · 5 years ago
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acts of love
bts / reader, all members / reader genre: best friends au, fluff + crack rating: general words: 9.6k warnings: platonic relationships, smoking, so much fluff you might need to book an appointment with ur dentist for tomorrow morning ASAP a/n: if u want 2 be bts’ best friend, raise ur hand *thousands of hands raise*. this fic fuels my genuine need to be their bff. i saw this post last night + wrote this immediately. hope u love it like i do :D 
➸ As long as you’ve got a good group of friends, anything is possible. Thankfully, you’ve got the best group you could ever ask for.
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(01) taking pics of ur friends without them asking u to bc they looked so pretty in that exact moment
“Well, at least the views not so bad. Honestly, I thought it would be a lot worse.”
Beside you, at the top of the bleachers that surround the large football pitch below, Taehyung huffs and kicks his feet up onto the empty row in front of him. It would be easy to just move rows, considering the game’s due to start in ten minutes time, and there’s plenty of empty seats closer. But, he’s bought these seats, and by the looks of things, Yoongi and Hoseok are already comfortable where they are, sharing a big bag of sticky popcorn between them. Casting a look to the right, you notice that Sana and Seunghee are making their way up, dressed in jerseys and caps, and you suddenly feel very out of place.
“Tell me why I came again?” you ask, not looking away from the pitch below. The grass is bright green, and every wandering body down on the pitch is just a small speck.
“Because,” Taehyung starts, unlocking his phone and checking his messages. You snoop- one missed text from Jeongguk and two off his Mom, which makes you smile. Taehyung’s always been a Mommy’s boy. “You love me, and you know that I worked my ass off for two whole months saving up for these tickets. And, since Jimin’s sick and couldn’t come, you decided to be a good friend and take his place.”
With a frown, you look back towards Taehyung. “I don’t know shit about football.”
“Cheer when we do,” Taehyung suggests honestly.
Yoongi perks up, patting your arm roughly. “Do what I do, and cheer for the team with the prettier uniform.”
“Don’t!” Taehyung hisses, grabbing you back. “The other team have a prettier uniform, but if you cheer for them on this side of the stadium, you’re going to get mobbed. Hey, Yoongi, don’t tell her that, she doesn’t know any better.”
“Just football,” Yoongi shrugs.
“Just football…” Taehyung scoffs and shrinks back down in his seat.
You laugh quietly, petting Taehyung’s leg with faux sympathy. As you move your body to glance around the stadium, strangely anticipating the start of the match, a flash out the corner of your eye makes you look over in Hoseok’s general direction. Hoseok holds his phone up, taking a photo, and then smiles as he checks it on the screen.
“Jung Hoseok, delete it now!” you gape, realising what he’s done. “Oh my God, I bet I look so ugly...you could have warned me.”
“Sorry,” he laughs sheepishly. He then shows you the screen, “you looked pretty! And it’s your first live match ever, we had to document it. Yoongi, look. Wow...I’m sending this to Jimin for proof that you’re having fun.”
“What if I’m not having fun?” you ask.
He glances up, “you are.”
Well. If he says so.
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(02) randomly giving tiny gifts (a comic book that ur friend likes, a heart-shaped piece of paper with a sweet message on it)
“Can anybody here share the exact chemistry behind Elephant Toothpaste?”
Chemistry is the absolute bane of your life. It’s only been a few weeks, and you’re already regretting taking additional classes in it. Technically, it was Jimin’s fault you were here in the first place. If it wasn’t for the fact that Jimin was afraid of enrolling into classes alone and therefore had guilted you into taking advanced chemistry with him, then you wouldn’t be here. You sigh for the fourth time in the last ten minutes and shove your chin into the palm of your hand. The clock above Professor Han’s head seems to be still, taunting you with zero movements.
Can boredom kill you? You wonder about that, letting your mind wander as Professor Han continues to quiz the front two rows on the exact chemical formula of the affectionately named Elephant Toothpaste. You’re so close to finding the answer when you feel somebody poking your upper arm. The finger that pokes belongs to Jimin, and you angle your head to look at him with a questioning glare.
Jimin smiles, his hair falling into his face. Like you, he rolled out of bed this morning and tried his best to look semi-presentable; if you counted borderline pajama wear and a serious case of bed-head to be presentable and acceptable for a 9am lecture. Jimin says nothing, just smiles and pushes something towards you with two fingers. The sound of the paper sliding towards you brings your gaze down, and as you look away to stare at it, Jimin returns his attention to Professor Han. Bare in mind, his notebook is empty, save doodles of Yewon on the front row, occasionally losing focus and staring around the room for long periods of time.
What Jimin has pushed before you is a small little piece of paper, smoothly cut into a heart shape. Now the sound of scissors makes sense… It’s just scrap paper from the back of his notebook, decorated with tiny stars and circles, a pathetic hand drawn galaxy on the front like a book cover. You slowly pick it up, more interested in this than the lecture. You turn it over curiously, your heart thumping endearingly and a smile picking up on your face as you read what he’s written on the back.
you and me have some serious chemistry. love u
Jimin refuses to make eye contact again. He’ll say something along the lines of, “you’re taking it too seriously” when you’ll no doubt ask him about it later, but really, Jimin’s just a softie, with the sudden need to tell his friends that he loves them. You’re not complaining.
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(03) handwritten letters with cute stickers
Something’s been left in your shared kitchen, something with your name on it and closed in an envelope with a small Gudetama sticker. You set your cup of tea to the side, sliding up onto a stool near the breakfast bar to read it. The front is in a bold font, in handwriting you don’t really recognise. Careful of the time and effort put into the appearance, you carefully open the envelope and take out the contents.
Y/N
Good morning. I hope you slept okay - when I came home last night after judo, you were actually passed out on the couch in the common room so I piggy backed you up to your room. Hehe, your room is so dirty though...I think I definitely tripped over a plug that connected your fairylights, so sorry if that doesn’t work anymore. Anyway. I left this morning and left you some nice tea and some tablets (Yoongi said that I should put them in your bathroom, so I literally just left them on your sink). I know you haven’t been having a fun time with midterms and you need to take care of yourself! If you get too sick and can’t do anything, then how will we eat?? You’re our uni mom!!! We need to live too!!!!! D:
I also rented out Harry Potter for later. I know you get really sad and lonely when you’re stressed out, and so we can watch it together when I’m home after my shift at work :D
Hehe, feel better <3 Just remember that Jeonggukie loves you!!!
Drink tea and stay warm :)
Lots of love, Jeongguk :D
The paper is signed with Jeongguk’s messy handwriting, like he ran out of time as he was writing it. The page is littered with tiny Gudetama stickers and the sight of it makes you smile. Along with other little notes Jeongguk’s left for you over the last few months, this one earns a spot on your cork board above your desk.
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(04) remembering what ur friend likes or dislikes
You were so late.
Almost getting run over by a bus in the process, you sprint across the small road that separates your flat and the University central campus, missing a deep puddle as you step up off the road and onto the pavement. It pours, your hair soaked and makeup no doubt running and staining your cheeks. Holy fuck, you were so late.
Every Friday, without fail, Flat 6 (aka the large and slightly stinky flat you share with two of your best friends) host an annual movie night, inviting literally all of your extended friendship group which definitely is not allowed, but who cares? You noticed Namjoon’s car pulled up in the car park next door and curse again, knowing you’re the last one to arrive to a movie night you’re technically hosting.
You rush up the stairs, since the elevator is still down for maintenance, and burst into the flat with an announcing groan. From somewhere in the living room, Jeongguk looks up with happy surprise and jumps up off the couch, approaching the hall.
“Y/N! You made it.”
You wince, smiling as you hang up your coat to drip dry on the mat near the door. “Yep. I made it. To my own movie night. That I’m technically helping host.”
“No sweat,” Jeongguk shrugs. “It’s okay. Here, I’ll dump your bag in the closet. Get changed, I think Yoongi’s still preparing snacks, anyway.”
“Okay. Thanks, Jeonggukie.”
He gushes, smiling and raising his shoulders cutely. “It’s okay, Y/N.”
Jeongguk swiftly takes your bag from your clutches, faking the weight with the droop of his knees just to hear you laugh, and then he turns to shuffle down the hall to quite literally toss it into the shared storage closet. You’re not too worried; on days like today, in which you have one 1 hour seminar to attend at 5pm and nothing else, there’s nothing inside your bag worthy of being broken by Jeongguk throwing it to the ground. As he does this, you shudder out of your shoes and make your way to your bedroom, to change into something warm and comfortable for the movie.
The sound of laughter makes you hurry to change, one leg out of your damp and cold jeans whilst simultaneously fishing for some old jogging bottoms out of your bottom draw, a jumper from Yoongi that he thought he lost left for you to grab on your bed. What he doesn’t know and will find out in five minutes won’t hurt him. (Yoongi also doesn’t care, because he’s a whipped best friend who lets you do what you want, including steal clothes he actually needs and can’t really afford to replace. Oh well, sharing is caring!).
Your hair is still soaked, and you move towards the single bathroom squeezed between two bedrooms to ring it out in the sink. Once you’re done, and your hair is thrown up into a scrunchie-decorated pony, you pace back towards the kitchen where, rightly so, Yoongi stands with his back facing you, filling up a glass with Pepsi.
“I thought we threw that shit out,” you announce as you walk in. “You know this flat is Team Coca Cola, those are the rules.”
Yoongi sighs, not looking up. “Yeah, I know, but Namjoon is a monster.”
“He’s so annoying...why can’t he just admit that Coca Cola is better?” you sigh, moving towards Yoongi to see the small bowls of snacks he has ready to be taken into the living room. It’s full in there, people stuffed onto the sofas and the floor where a bed of blankets lies like a mattress.
Yoongi’s outdone himself; the bowls are neatly organised by colour and ingredient, and you smile. Yoongi was a lot of things, one of them a secret perfectionist. Even when it concerned bowls of snacks. God, you love to love him.
“Namjoon’s a man of unpopular opinions, I mean, he really thinks the live action of Attack on Titan is good, like, who actually thinks that?” Yoongi rants, and then he glances to the side towards you, is silent for a moment, and then asks, “is that my jumper?”
You look down at it with a smile. “Yep. It’s comfy.”
Yoongi hums, like he’s bored. “Whatever, looks better on you than it did on me. Who the fuck lied to me and told me dark green was my colour...?”
“Every colour is your colour,” you say, patting his back and reaching for the bowls. “Should I take these in?”
Yoongi then nods, humming again. “Yeah. Yellow bowl is for you, by the way.”
You look to it. “And why is that?”
“Cause I know you don’t like the barbeque flavour chips that are in the red bowl, but everyone else does, so I went out and got you the salty ones. Oh, and there’s a bar of Galaxy in the fridge. Don’t tell Jeongguk, cause he’ll get pissy about how I didn’t get him something.”
As Yoongi tells you this, your heart flutters. You had told him that when you first met, after he offered you some of his chips noticing you were the only person not eating.
“You remembered that?” you wonder, and Yoongi looks at you like you’ve lost your mind.
“I’m a good friend,” he states, as though it were obvious. “Don’t get it twisted, though. I only did it because I don’t want to hear you complaining about it all night.”
You’re sure that’s a lie, but if it makes him feel better, you’ll accept it. You’ll also ignore the embarrassed tinge of red on his cheeks.
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(05) inside jokes
[15:16PM] jeongguk: alright fuckers 🔪😡 [15:16PM] jeongguk: who left the kitchen window open all damn night [15:17PM] jeongguk: there’s three spiders in the sink and it rained so the work surface is all wet [15:17PM] jeongguk: [1 Image Attached] not happy bois [15:23PM] jine: i dont even live with you why are you asking the gc this [15:24PM] jeongguk: yoongi has the flat gc muted and idk how else to yell at him [15:28PM] y/n: blame me,,,,i have failed u,,,,,,,im sowwy [15:29PM] jeongguk: hehe its ok ❣️💘💕💓 i’ll clean it up 🥰 [15:32PM] haseul: eye….. [15:39PM] jimin: YALL LMAOODIUGJFKDSLJ [15:39PM] jimin: guess what TF just happened in my maths class [15:41PM] jimin: i forgot that on one of my assignments me and y/n had drawn a camel in the library on the back and he saw and asked me 2 stay behind after class so he could have stern words with me or smthn…..anyway so i go to the front of the class at the end and he’s like “mr park what the hell is this camel doing here” [15:42PM] jimin: and i said sir thats not a camel [15:42PM] jimin: thats my WIFE [15:43PM] y/n: HA HA HA… [15:45PM] yoongi: IF YALL DONT STOP [15:47PM] taehyung: THIS IS THE THIRD TIME YOU’VE MADE THIS REFERENCE AND I DONT KNOW WHAT IT MEANS [15:47PM] taehyung: this inside joke stinks….someone explain to me please what this means 😭😭😭 [15:48PM] hoseok: i hate this damn gc
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(06) long phone calls
[Incoming Facetime Call From: Seokjin 👪]
“Hey.”
“Hey. Y/N, are you sitting down because I have some major tea on Professor Kwon and Professor Kim and I’m not supposed to be saying anything and it’s killing me.”
“Oh shit.” Audio shuffles. “I’m lying down now, bitch. Tell me everything.”
“Okay. So…”
[Five Hours Later]
“I’m still in shock about Kwon and Kim.”
“Me too. What’s Kim gonna do, lie and say she had heat rash on her titties?”
“Hopefully she doesn’t get them out for people to see.”
“Literally. God, I hate how our life has resorted to teacher gossip. Are we those students?”
“Yup. Two students bitching about teachers at...like ...midnight?”
“Oh, shit, it’s midnight already??”
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(07) facetiming while ur both doing something else (study dates like that are on another level of intimacy)
Jimin’s had the same cold for about two weeks now, and nobody knows what the hell’s up with it. He walks around his flat, according to Hoseok, wrapped up in a blanket and surrounded by a necklace of matted tissues. To be honest, it’s not as bad as he’s making it out to be, but he’s a guy, and so anything that involves a slight stomach pain and a blocked nose instantly translates to man flu, which is almost as bad as the plague.
That being said, Jimin’s set himself under “house arrest” and is therefore glued to his bed or desk chair, still managing to move his sore and aching joints to write a few words on his lab report. With the first round of finals creeping up, Jimin actually wants to go to the library, but, man, what with his man flu and everything, he just can’t seem to do it.
On the other hand, he has you to set the mood for him. After snagging a corner table in the library near the big windows, you make a barrier out of your bag and books to watch the sunset, Taehyung opposite using minimal space with his laptop and headphones, watching a documentary he’ll need to cite for his essay. Jeongguk naps next to you, having exhausted himself from his shift last night that ran into the early hours and Sana secretly paints her nails, blowing them dry as she takes a break from writing.
Once you’re settled and comfortable, you reluctantly peel away the slice of tape covering your webcam (because Black Mirror has forever scared you into thinking 4Chan are watching you and will hold your endless hours of Games2Girls dot com against you) and open up Facetime, ringing Jimin who waits patiently back home.
After a few rings, Jimin’s bright and tired face pops up on the screen and you both silently wave. Jimin has his mic muted, but yours is on, allowing the ambience of the library trick Jimin into believing he’s actually there. It’s not quite like an ordinary study date, but for now, it’ll do. He opens his textbook and starts to work, comfortable and happy now that he’s listening to his friends discuss work, like he’s there. He smiles, occasionally glancing up to see your face working or Jeongguk unintentionally leaning into frame. It’s comforting. He works well.
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(08) cooking something for ur friend
“Merry Christmas, Tae. Oh, wait, I have something for you.”
Taehyung is hosting a Christmas party this year, in the apartment he shares with some of the girls in your group and Namjoon. His flat is lit up with lights, draining the electricity, the tree sparkling like diamonds in the front living room that looks out onto the Seoul city. The sound of Michael Bublé sings out festively and Taehyung leads you through to the kitchen, out of the loud madness of the party that’s getting into full swing. In one hand, you have a big bag of presents that both Jeongguk and Yoongi kindly left for you to haul all by yourself to Taehyung’s flat, and in the other, you balance a box across your arm, the corner sharp on your inner elbow.
“Cool. Your gift is under the tree,” Taehyung says.
“Oh, yeah. No, this is an early gift.”
“Just for me?” he asks.
You set down the box. “Well, you can share if you love us all a lot. But, it’s for you.”
Taehyung wastes no time in opening the box, a smile widening across his face as he reviews the contents. The box is stuffed full with cookies, baked big and crumbly for his tasty pleasures. They’re decorated too, because you love him so much and you know he liked them last year.
“Last year you ate nearly all of my batch, so I just decided to make you some of your own this year,” you tell him casually. It’s really no big deal, but Taehyung feels like he might actually cry because the thought is so sweet. You notice this, the glassiness of your eyes. “Ew, don’t cry.”
“I’m sorry, I’m touched!” he exclaims. Taehyung turns on his spot and wraps an arm around your neck, pulling you in for a hug. With your arms wrapped around his torso, Taehyung smiles with a thrilled sound and kisses the crown of your head. “Thanks, Y/N, you’re the best.”
“Yeah, yeah. I know.”
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(09) sending texts when u randomly think abt them
[11:15AM] namjoon 👨🏼‍🚀: i stopped by at kyobo’s today and found a cards against humanity add on pack that was harry potter themed and i thought of u lol [11:15AM] namjoon 👨🏼‍🚀: i bought it for u btw 😊
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(10) listening without judging
When the front door slams shut, you know that something’s wrong.
Having opted for sitting in the natural light of the living room to finish your lab report, the sound of the door echoes loudly throughout the empty house. It’s only you home, since Yoongi has volleyball practise until six this evening, which means it’s Jeongguk who’s home and apparently, not in a very good mood.
Jeongguk doesn’t realise you’re in the living room until he enters it, stopping suddenly in the doorway when he sees you cross-legged on the carpet near the coffee table. His eyes are red and swollen, his nose shiny from where he’s been crying and sniffling. The sight makes your stomach churn with an indescribable feeling, and you immediately rise to your feet.
“Jeongguk? What’s wrong- did something happen?” you ask him, not stepping forward until you know he’s okay. 
Jeongguk’s sensitive, the baby of the friendship group, and sometimes you forget to go easy on him. He sighs loudly and drops his backpack to the floor with a thud. His books curl inside loudly and he drags his feet across the floor to get to the couch. He moves as if he’s going to sit down and then stops, turning to you. His bottom lip curls like he’s about to cry, and then he opens his arms for a hug. You immediately move forward.
“Oh, Jeonggukkie,” you coo, stroking his hair and moving to sit on the sofa. Jeongguk comes down with you and you rest his head on top of your breasts, granting him this once in a lifetime opportunity and he doesn’t even register it. He just cries, loudly and comfortably, his arms around you as he sobs. “Oh, my baby. What happened?”
Jeongguk hiccups. “Do-Doesn’t matter. It’s dumb.”
“No, it’s not. Something hurt your feelings, and your feelings aren’t dumb,” you tell him seriously. Stroking the hair out of his face, you peer down at him. “Come on. Tell me, I won’t judge or tell anybody else. You can trust me.”
He sniffs loudly, but you don’t cringe. He blinks, tears falling and he embarrassingly wipes the tears away, nodding. “Okay.” And then the words come out like vomit.
“I just. You know how I liked Sooyoung, right? Well, we were talking- everyone knows we were, but still, we were talking, and I just really liked her and wanted her to like me. I did all this stuff for her, planned all these dates and got her flowers. I thought she liked flowers, girls like flowers. I know we joke that you’re one of the guys, but even you liked those flowers I got for you. So, I got her this pretty necklace with an S on it and was going to give it to her and so I went to her practise room. She does dance, you knew she does dance, right? Yeah. And so I went to the room and was in the room talking to her when the door opens and this guy comes in and he comes up to her and they kiss and I just. She. She told me she didn’t want to rush into dating and that she liked me, and then she suddenly started dating someone else and I’m just really hurt and confused. Did I do something wrong? Am I ugly? Am I annoying, I just...I don’t know what I did. I really liked her.”
You don’t say anything as he talks. You just listen intently, nodding against his head with a low hum and stroking his hair gently.
“I know it’s silly and stupid that I’m crying over a girl, it’s just…” He sighs. “It hurts.”
You sigh, too. “It’s not silly and stupid. What Sooyoung did was really shitty and it’s natural that it hurt your feelings. You did absolutely nothing wrong, though. The flowers were pretty, and you didn’t force her into anything, and you were so kind and patient. Any girl would be lucky enough to have you as a boyfriend. Sooyoung missed out! You’re so good, Jeongguk, one of the best guys I know. And you’re not ugly! That’s an insult to actual ugly people! If you’re ugly, then what are we?” He laughs shyly and you smile, “Huh? What are we?”
“Okay, sorry,” Jeongguk laughs, pressing his cheek into your torso with a wide smile. His hands loop together behind your back, meek and timid, and he sighs, this time less sadly. “Maybe I’m destined to be alone forever…”
“You’re being dramatic, now,” you sigh. “The right person is waiting for you. Just give it some time.”
Jeongguk thinks about that for a moment. “Wanna date me if I end up alone and single aged thirty?”
Loudly, you let out a laugh. “Yeah right. You know what, fine. Even though I know you won’t be, if we’re both single by thirty, I’ll marry you. How about that?”
Jeongguk hums. “Cool. Is it safe to have kids after thirty?”
You let out a wheeze, taken aback by Jeongguk’s question. “Woah there. I said I’d marry you, not birth your children! Besides, you’re acting like thirty is ancient! Lots of women have kids aged thirty.”
“Okay, sorry, I didn’t know! My Mom was only young.”
“I can’t believe you just asked me to have kids with you when we’re thirty…”
“Might as well make our marriage interesting,” Jeongguk shrugs.
You quite literally have nothing to say to that.
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(11) making someone laugh so hard that their whole body shakes
“Ow- stop! I’m going to pee!”
You don’t think you’ve seen Seokjin laugh at a joke that’s not his own in quite some time. Tonight, across the table in the retro diner that’s been converted and opened in town, he has surprised you. The entire booth shakes with laughter, from all sides and directions. Seokjin leans up against the window, clutching his side with Jimin, Mina and Yoongi all stuffed next to him on the skinny one seater. Next to you, on either side, is Hoseok and Taehyung, with Jeongguk and Namjoon at the counter ordering more drinks.
“What?” you ask, laughing. You’re not laughing because it’s funny, but more so because you have no idea what it is you did to make him laugh so hard. “What did I say?”
Seokjin can hardly get his words out, choking halfway on air and having to reach for his drink which shakes in his hand. He sips and gasps for air: “Just-your...face!” Then he cracks up again, like it’s the literal joke of the century. You just don’t get it.
“What did I do?” you ask. “What’s so funny?”
Seokjin can’t breathe.
“Oh my God,” Yoongi comments, smiling with disbelief and covering his mouth as he laughs. Mina’s french fries are stone cold as she laughs and leans into Yoongi’s side for support.
“Fuck. Y/N, you’re so funny, I love you so much,” Seokjin cries. Cries, literally; there are tears pooling out of his eyes, and he wipes them, sighing loudly as he laughs a few more times.
You’re going to take the compliment happily, and move on. To this day, you never found out what was so funny…
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(12) hanging out in furniture stores and testing every couch there is
“Take a picture of me so we can pretend this is our house for Instagram.”
You sigh, taking out your phone and snapping a photo of Taehyung, lounging his legs apart across a lime green sofa that looks like it’s been hauled out of a 70’s magazine. One of the best things about Taehyung is that he’s easy to please, eccentric and adventurous just like you. Taehyung could be taken to a junkyard for a first date and somehow he’d still find it fun. He didn’t watch Bottletop Bill and his best friend Corky and leave not taking some inspiration on what to do with scrap junk.
It slowly became a tradition to go to the weirdest places with Taehyung as your date. On weekends or free weekdays you shared, you’d text Taehyung and get him to come with you to somewhere new. On today’s list, IKEA. It’s not totally crazy, or weird or wacky, just something you don’t think you’d do with Yoongi for fun. Taehyung loved the idea.
Taehyung’s making it a mission to sit on every bit of furniture he can find. As he takes a ride up the elevator to the first and main starting point of IKEA, he immediately notices the display couches and stares at you excitedly: “Let’s pretend we’re about to buy our dream house and test all the couches.”
Your eyes light up. “Yes! We can pretend we’re on a TV show reviewing them.”
You don’t think you’ve ever seen Taehyung more excited. “Oh my God, yes!” Then he grabs your hand, tugging you towards a cream themed living display. “Let’s go, wifey! Time to review.”
(You very nearly leave IKEA with a bright red sofa that looks like it’s been handmade and the bottom pillows are patterned with tiny cherries. Sadly, you’re both broke and you don’t have a car to take it home.)
((Taehyung’s devastated.))
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(13) deep conversations when it's deep in the night
Sometimes, Yoongi stays awake until the early hours in the living room and kitchen. On days where you can’t sleep, you can hear him pacing around, softly grunting as he walks, something he does without really realising and something you love about him. On occasion, you join him. Like tonight, for example.
Yoongi’s curled up on the kitchen counter when you wake up and leave your room to find him. He sits with his back up against the cupboards, the kitchen window open with a cigarette out the window. Catching your gaze wide-eyed, he moves as if he’s going to put the cigarette out but you stop him.
“I told Jeongguk I’d stop,” Yoongi explains. Inside, he’s just grateful you’re not Jeongguk tonight. The cigarette lets off steam. He doesn’t smoke as often as he used to, just when he needs to. Yoongi looks away from the window as you pick yourself up to sit on the cupboards parallel to him. A bottle of wine is out, and you quietly take off the top and take a large swig.
“You don’t have to explain anything to me,” you tell him honestly. “It’s okay. I won’t tell Jeongguk, too. There’s a new air freshener in the cupboard under the sink. Use that when you’re done.”
Yoongi nods. “Yeah. Thanks, Y/N.”
“Why’d you go back to smoking anyway? Didn’t you tell Jeongguk that you were stopping because you didn’t want to die, or something?” It’s a joke, Yoongi snorts in reply.
“You know how he feels about it. I do too, and I guess I just felt bad about it. It was bad enough for him growing up and at home, and he told me about his brothers asthma attacks because of it and how he almost died, and how his parents smoked religiously and it made them act a certain way.” Yoongi sucks in his breath, like he’s realising what lighting the cigarette means. “It’s not weed. Not what his parents did, but. Still, fuck.” He decides to put it out.
For a while, you don’t say anything to Yoongi. Staring at him is telling enough, and you watch as Yoongi regrets what he’s done so much that he pales, his eyes watering.
“I don’t want to let him down,” Yoongi admits truthfully. “He’s like my little brother. I don’t wanna hurt him, fuck.”
He rocks his head back, sighing into the night. Down below the window, over the small little cliffside that he can see from his window that looks down onto the freeway behind the flat, he watches the lines of traffic whiz by, like long white lights, the honks like ASMR in his ears.
“If you’re going back to bed, can you go in my room and take the rest of my cigs out? Don’t wanna feel tempted by them. Toss them out or something, will you?”
You nod immediately, taking another drink of wine. This gulp stings. “Course. Yeah, I’m gonna go now actually.” You hop down off the counter, handing the bottle and placing it next to Yoongi. “Don’t stay up too late, mkay?”
“Yeah. Thanks.”
You shrug in reply, Yoongi frowns. As you walk towards the doorway that separates the kitchen and the hall, you turn around and look back at Yoongi, calling his name. Yoongi looks over and raises his eyebrows expectantly.
“Love you,” you tell him. A smile follows, and Yoongi blinks tiredly.
“I love you too. Goodnight, Y/N.”
He watches as you disappear into the darkness of the hallway and then faces the nighttime again. The smell of cigarettes lingers, and his stomach churns. Yoongi reaches for the air freshener you mentioned and sprays it generously, sniffing and then turning off the lights to the kitchen. Jeongguk will wake up and complain about the window being open, and might even notice the ash on the windowsill, but, like you, he still loves his big brother regardless.
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(14) holding hands while jaywalking so that u Both get hit by a car
“Now!”
A squeal leaves your mouth as Jeongguk grabs a hold of your hand and literally pulls you across the road. A car that speeds down the road presses the horn loud enough to turn a few heads and Jeongguk grins boyishly, raising his hand as if to say sorry even though you’re far enough away to not get hit. Jeongguk’s motto for jaywalking is We Hold Hands, Because We Go Together Or We Don’t Go Down At All, or something. You know he stole half of it from an All Time Low song, but it works, and the song slaps.
From across the road, on the side you and Jeongguk are running towards, Hoseok gapes at the both of you and his eyes bulge out of his head.
“You two have a death wish!” he yells.
“But we lived, bitch!” Jeongguk replies, raising a gang sign to which Hoseok pulls a face at.
“I literally cannot stand you,” Hoseok seethes, walking away even though he’s supposed to be going out for dinner with the both of you. You and Jeongguk share a look that ends in a burst of giggles and run after Hoseok, capturing each of his arms with your own. He complains all the way to the restaurant, even though he loves it.
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(15) randomly buying a flower for someone
“Delivery.”
Namjoon’s voice lifts your head. He stands behind the reception desk of your flat complex with a small bunch of flowers in his left hand. If he didn’t already know that you were working your two hour shift today, then he’s lucky he caught you. The sight of a bouquet of wildflowers makes your heart soar curiously.
“For someone special?” you wonder. Maybe he’s delivering to someone in the complex. Namjoon’s a sweetie like that.
Namjoon blinks. “Yeah. You.” He holds the bouquet outwards, with a bright smile. “They were for sale outside as I got off my subway. Thought of you, again. Happy early birthday.”
“My birthday’s in, like, seven months,” you say.
“That’s why it’s for your early birthday,” Namjoon replies.
You don’t know what to say. “They’re so pretty, thank you. Hey - can you go up to my flat and put them in a vase? I’ve still got an hour here, they might dry out if they’re kept down here.”
Namjoon nods instantly. “Sure. Gimme your key?” You slide the key across the desk towards Namjoon and he takes it swiftly. “Cool. Glad you like them. Enjoy your shift, Y/N.”
“Unlikely,” you groan. “Thanks, Joonie!”
He smiles as he reaches the door, sticking his tongue out to you as he prepares to climb the stairs. That elevator needs fixing urgently, and all you can think about is how much you love your friends.
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(16) letting ur friends taste ur food and also tasting theirs to the point where u basically ate a fair amount off of each plate on the table
“What do you mean you’ve never tried a steak before?” Yoongi sighs so loudly that it turns a few heads. “Okay. Take a bite, it’s called charity and I’m generous. Come on.”
Yoongi even cuts you a slice and leans over the table to let you taste it. Beside you, Namjoon cringes when you close your teeth around the fork and pull the steak off, taking several bites and widening your eyes with wonder a Yoongi. You have just unlocked a taste sensation!
“Like it?” Yoongi asks.
“Mhm! It’s so easy to eat,” you observe. You look at Namjoon, “try his.”
Yoongi sighs. He willingly shares his food out. You glance down at your own meal, a pretty pasta dish that Jeongguk looks at from next to Yoongi.
“What is that? It looks good,” Jeongguk asks.
“Spaghetti Al Pomodoro,” you quote from the menu. Jeongguk laughs, because who goes to a restaurant and orders spaghetti? “Stop, I don’t know the menu, I played it safe!”
“Lemme try,” Jeongguk invites himself to try the taste, twirling his fork around the pasta and sucking it up like a scene in Lady and the Tramp. This sets off a sequence around the table, something you can’t help but snigger at. Namjoon lets you try some of his curry and Yoongi tries Jeongguk’s burger. By the time everybody on the table has tried everybody elses meals, you finally look back at your plate and notice that literally half of the meal’s now gone. Yoongi has about one bite of steak left, and Jeongguk could easily finish his burger in one bite.
“I hope everyone enjoyed my meal,” Yoongi says sarcastically, and he angrily chews his last piece of steak.
Namjoon looks up with a bright smile. “Yeah I did. Thanks!”
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(17) "give me that I'll carry it for u"
Sometimes, Hoseok stops by at the reception to help out, especially during finals or midterms when you could really use those two years of monitoring an empty email inbox to study. Today, one of the newer residents, Somi, is on the desk and is playing Club Penguin on the computer, and you’re shoved into the back storage room with Hoseok, filing everybody’s mail and parcels.
It’s so messy in here, and looks like it hasn’t had a good clean out since it was first built, which might sound ridiculous, but have you seen all of this dust?
“Can you guys take out the trash?” One of the other workers, Siwon, pokes his head into the back room.
“You only just asked us to do this, though,” Hoseok points out with his hands on his hips.
Siwon shrugs, “Okay. And? Get to work.”
He turns and leaves as Hoseok gives him the middle finger, groaning as he arches his back to relieve pain that’s developed from being hunched over for too long. The trash bags are enormous and bulky with weight, shoved into a single room that absolutely honks. Hoseok grimaces as he opens the door and drags some bags out, deliberately ignoring a suspicious juice leaving a trail behind one of the ones he’s just brought into the back room.
“That literally stinks,” you complain.
“Yep.”
While Hoseok continues to haul bags out of the trash room, you take it upon yourself to drag the bags out to the back, towards the giant tip that’s collected by the bin-men the following day. After two or three trips, Hoseok steps out of the room and notices you struggling to pick a big bag up off the floor over your shoulder, like Santa’s sack.
“Give me that, I’ll carry it for you,” Hoseok offers, already stepping forward.
“No!” you protest stubbornly. “I’ve got this.”
“You’re so full of bullshit,” Hoseok howls. He ignores you and snatches the bag out of your hands. You’ll never admit it, but it feels good to not have the twisty material burning your fingers. “Sit down. You’ve worked hard.”
“Don’t patronise me,” you scold.
He giggles, “sorry. You’re too cute. Keep filling in those forms, kill two birds with one stone?”
You wait until Hoseok’s out of the room to cradle your fingers. Fucking hell, that hurts.
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(18) helping ur friend decide what to wear while also reminding them that they look amazing no matter what
“You’re not going to the Met Gala, Jimin. Just wear jeans, my dude.”
“No. No, no, ignore him.” You throw a glare in Jeongguk’s direction and shift on your stomach, watching Jimin frantically search through his wardrobe. “This is important. This is serious. He’s going to see a potential employer, Jeongguk.”
“Yeah,” Jimin taunts, “so go be jobless and broke somewhere else.”
Jeongguk snorts, “I have a job, though…”
“Okay, get out of my room. Y/N, help me.”
“You looked good in the last four outfits,” you say to him honestly. “What’s wrong with this one, hm?”
You stand up, moving to one of the outfits laid out on the floor. It’s a pretty combination of clothes; a patterned white shirt that’s both formal and casual, with black trousers and brown shoes.
“I don’t like the shoes,” Jimin mumbles, continuing to search.
“Okay...Why don’t we just…” You crouch, moving a pair of black shoes from outfit number three to outfit number two. Now the shoes are black, and the outfit looks great. “Do that? What do you think?”
Jimin looks down at it, biting his bottom lip. “Is it good?”
“Yeah, totally,” you nod with enthusiasm. “It shows your personality whilst also remaining professional. And you looked super handsome in it.” Jimin faces you with a shy smile, “Trust me. It’s the one.”
It takes some reluctance and convincing, but Jimin eventually settles on outfit number two. All it took was some convincing and abuse of his praise kink.
(And he got the job.)
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(19) being involved in every bad hair decision (dyeing ur friend's hair grey in between playing with their switch)
Three games into Mario Kart, you realise that you urgently need to email Nintendo and play I’m-Karen-Let-Me-See-The-Manager. Nintendo Switches are so dangerously addictive that Seokjin has you watching him play as grey hair dye bleaches his scalp. You can’t help but watch as he wins race after race, a streak of ten to beat tonight with King Boo as his racer every damn time.
“Fuck, your hair!” You must have said that so many times that Seokjin’s bound to get sick of it. He glances up at his reflection and eyes the sight on his head.
“Looks fine,” he shrugs.
“Let me remind you that it looks fine because the colour’s okay at the front. It looks kinda...patchy at the back.” You reach for the dye, “We’re low. Seokjin, we’re in trouble.”
He shrugs again. “Whatever. We can make a new trend.”
“Hell no. If it looks shit, I’m paying for you to get it done professionally ...which, you should have just done in the first place. I'm not a hairdresser!”
“And thank fuck for that!” Jimin steps into the living room and laughs nervously. “That looks hideous!”
This time, Seokjin’s eyes raise icily.
“It’s not that bad…” you mutter. “It’s okay. I’ll fix it.”
“The only way to save your hair is to just sacrifice it all,” Jimin sighs. “You know what, I’ve got a razor in my cupboard, let’s bring forward bald Seokjin.”
“I’ll take the patchy scalp,” Seokjin threatens.
“It’s really not that bad,” you pout quietly, attempting to fix the mess at the back of his head.
Okay - you’re lying. It’s awful. It’s a total disaster. But when Seokjin gets a good look at it, and he does take a good long look, he just shrugs and puts down the mirror.
“It’s a trend,” he decides. Mario Kart resumes and you’re rendered absolutely speechless.
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(20) paying attention
When forced into a group of friends outside of your own, you always had a tendency to stand out in the worst ways possible. It’s not as if you stood out for being different, or funny or pretty. No; outside of your close circle of friends, you were the obvious outsider. You stuck out like an imposter, like a red flower amongst white ones.
This get together hosted by one of Jeongguk’s other friends, Joshua, takes place in his crazy expensive lake house in the countryside, owned by his parents and left to him when he turned eighteen. It’s remarkable that you got invited, to be honest. But, when Jeongguk’s your best friend, you get vouched for, granted permission to stay for the weekend in the one of many rooms, with the exception of sharing a room with two other guys. Jeongguk doesn’t mind sharing a bed for the weekend with Jimin, as long as you’re comfortable in your own.
And you’re not blind - it’s not hard to figure out why a big group of girls who had managed invitations were clinging to your circle of friends. You had lucked out in a way that ensured your entire group were visuals, everybody stunning in their own unique way. Joshua and his friends are here too, obviously, but their eyes are only on a certain segment of the group. From this angle, one of the girls who made her way over to the sofas sits with her back in your general direction, and it sort of feels like primary school all over again where you were the odd one out.
You try not to let it bother you, though. As the guys play polite and laugh when needed and talk casually, something slips up in conversation: “Well, actually-” One of the girls is talking, blinking repetitively in Namjoon’s direction with a sweet smile, “I think I have more guy friends than girls. Girls are so hard to talk to sometimes.”
“Right?” one of the others says with a sigh. “I wish I had more male friends. I want to move in with some in the future.”
You inhale. This is a good conversation to jump into. “Same,” you say. The girl in front of you turns around slightly, perhaps only just remembering that you were there in the first place. “I’ve been friends with these guys forever now, and living with them is so…” You notice after a short ramble that the girls turned back around, and she’s not even listening. You trail off, looking bored, “who am I even talking to?”
But from across the coffee table on the other couch, Yoongi furrows his brows and sets his glass down. “Y/N’s right,” he announces, and you look up at the same time as the other girls. Like they’re confused, they look at the group and then back at you, as if wondering the connection. “You know, guys are always told being friends with girls is impossible, but Y/N’s the glue that keeps us together.”
Jeongguk nods, “Mhm, exactly! You know, they said that it would be hard being friends with girls because you’d catch feelings, but Y/N’s so repulsive that it’s not even that hard...”
You glare at him, “Ha-ha. Very funny.”
“Trust me,” Chaeyoung pops up, having been sat silently in between Taehyung and Mark for the past twenty six minutes, “it’s not all that.” The girls look at her, “Men are disgusting. I don’t know how Y/N does it. These guys are the repulsive ones...I was in their flat for five minutes and I think I caught three diseases.”
“Hey, don’t drag my apartment into this,” you pout. Yoongi shakes his head with a smile and watches you, happy that the frown that was once on your features had disappeared into a smile. Hey, in a weird way, this was a good conversation to jump into! 
The girls around you share glances, as though they’ve just clocked on to how important you are to these guys and how ignoring you won’t make them like them more, and eventually, you’re included in the conversation. You make a mental reminder to thank the fuck out of Yoongi for paying attention to you, even when you’re silently in the background.
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(21) being aware and understanding of someone's financial situation ("dw I'll pay for u")
“We all need matching ones. Look, one each!”
Jeongguk excitedly crouches in front of one of the display cases, marvelling at the sight of tiny little charms on foam boxes, smiling up at you all. It makes you weak seeing how childlike Jeongguk actually is, how he gets excited over shiny things like a little magpie. Today is one of those rare afternoons where you’re all miraculously free, and it had been Namjoon’s idea to go out somewhere and hang out. Seoul is filled with beautiful and secret places to explore like a tourist and he takes up the opportunity.
This shop is dinky and in a weird place between an ice-cream shop and a fish market, probably scammy and has definitely seen better days. But Namjoon likes it, and Yoongi vouches for it because he’s been here before with Namjoon when they brought a watch for Jimin. Okay, yes, it was a designer watch, but it was way cheaper from this shop and, wait, who cares if it’s fake? Nobody noticed until now.
You stand behind Jeongguk, peering down at the charms. They’re all so cute and cartoon-like, each charm you view immediately reminding you of another friend. For Jeongguk, the rabbit. Taehyung could have the paintbrush or camera, Jimin definitely could have the apple because of the fact that his new favourite thing to say is An Apple A Day Keeps The Demons Away. It makes no sense, but he learns to roll with it.
“They’re cute,” Hoseok comments, smiling widely.
“They should be cute, for thirty dollars a charm!” you gape, pointing out the price. “I thought this was a shop that sold things cheaper?!”
“They’re usually around sixty,” Namjoon shrugs.
“For why?” you exclaim.
Nobody hears that, or if they do, they ignore it. With a sigh, you turn away from the case and start looking at something else. Thirty dollars for a small charm is insane, and you don’t have that kind of money. As Taehyung and Jeongguk start picking charms for everybody, your heart rate quickens. 
How can you tell them that you don’t want a charm because you can’t afford a charm without disappointing them and sounding like you’re asking one of them to buy you one? In your panic, Seokjin worms his way up behind you and rests his arm up on your head like an arm-rest.
“Have you picked a charm?” he asks, and you look away instantly. “Hey,” he says, noticing that, “what’s up, buttercup?”
You sigh reluctantly. “I can’t afford to get one of those…”
Seokjin blinks and frowns slightly. “Oh. Well, that’s okay. I’ll pay for you.”
“No way!” you hiss at him, poking a finger into his chest. “Kim Seokjin, don’t you dare-!”
“Hey, I owe you, it’s cool,” Seokjin assures you.
“Owing me because I paid for your McDonalds is not the same as spending thirty dollars on a tiny charm.”
“They’re friendship charms,” he explains. “It’s symbolic for our friendship. Look, stay silent and pretty and let me get you something nice. Please?”
In this one instance, Seokjin doesn’t take no for an answer and invites himself into the small huddle of guys around the charms and picks one out for you. Seokjin picks you a love heart, because he knows that no matter what, there’s a love between the guys and you that nothing can pull apart.
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(22) looking stupid in public together (dancing in stores to overplayed pop songs)
You hear it at the same time as Jeongguk.
One thing you don’t mind that much about Korea is that the sound of random K-POP groups follows you around everywhere you go. You actually kind of like it, because the songs are catchy enough and Jimin and Hoseok like it for the dances. But, my God, if you have to hear Momoland’s Bboom Bboom one more time, you might explode.
Over the hum of the refrigerators in the small GS25, where you and Jeongguk are examining the surprisingly large collection of flavoured milks, you hear those guitar strums and just as the horns roll in, you and Jeongguk share a glance and immediately do The Thing.
The Thing is recreating the entire dance routine to the song, which you had both decided to learn when you were bored and procrastinating during midterms. Everybody else in your friendship group deems it the single most embarrassing thing that you and Jeongguk do in public next to jaywalking, and maybe you can see why. The chorus rolls by and you’re both shimmying, pointing finger hearts to each other, and it’s rolling to an end when one of the cashiers turns the corner with a big tray of iced coffee in her arms.
She pauses and so do the both of you, in an intense stare off until she cowers and scurries to put down the tray and carefully shelf the drinks. Jeongguk looks at you with the urge to laugh and picks a random milk off the shelf, urging you out of the aisle to pay. When you’re outside and free from the judgement of the cashier, Jeongguk laughs on the floor for about five straight minutes.
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(23) looking stupid in public together (singing loudly in ur car)
“JUST GO AHEAD AND HATE ON ME AND RUN YOUR MOUTH!”
“So everyone can hear!”
“HIT ME WITH THE WORST YOU GOT AND KNOCK ME DOWN!”
“Oh, baby, I don’t care.”
“KEEP IT UP AND SOON ENOUGH, YOU’LL FIGURE OUT!”
Both of your voices: “You wanna be, you wanna be, A LOSER LIKE ME!”
In the backseat, Yoongi shrinks further down until his bum is hanging off the chair, in the footwell where his knees are. “Please kill me.”
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(24) hugging people when u say hi and goodbye to them
Hoseok is one of the best friends you could ever ask for. One, he’s friendly. Two, he’s funny. Three, he’s cute. Four, he hugs you when you arrive somewhere and again when you leave, and you absolutely love it.
“Y/N, hi!” His voice is the first to call out to you when you walk into the Open Day fair at your Uni. You look awful, overslept and still half asleep, but he comes towards you with a smile and engulfs you in a hug. “You look cute. Sleep well?”
That’s not to say the other guys don’t hug you, because they definitely do. But, Hoseok’s always the first.
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(25) being there for someone even if u can't help them
“Go ahead. Laugh at me like everybody else.”
Jimin and Jeongguk are the ones who are unfortunately tasked with dealing with a tragically grieving Y/N. It’s unfortunate to you, but they don’t mind one bit. The last thing they expected to see when they came back to Jeongguk’s apartment to watch more episodes of Mindhunter on Jeongguk’s TV, was you curled up on the window seat with red eyes and a runny nose.
“Why would we laugh at you, baby?” Jeongguk asks, rubbing your back. He’s sat next to you and Jimin is by your feet, rubbing them and your legs with his soft hands.
You sniff uglily, but none of them say anything. “Cause. Cause it’s just a fish, I guess.”
“It was still your pet,” Jimin points out sadly. “Susan was a great fish.”
You sniff again, crying some more. “I just feel like a bad owner. Maybe the bowl wasn’t big enough, and maybe I didn’t feed her enough...I don’t want her to have died because of me.”
“Hey, now,” Jeongguk assures softly, “I’m sure she died peacefully. You were the best fish Mom ever. Susan’s in a better place now.” He glances over at Jimin nervously, “Like, fish heaven?”
For a moment you don’t say anything, and Jeongguk thinks maybe that was too much. But then you turn to him with a hopeful expression. “You really think so?”
“Yeah, of course,” Jeongguk replies.
“Susan’s still with you in your heart,” Jimin adds. He’s not too great at the comforting thing. “You were so good to her. If I was a fish, I’d want you to be my Mom.”
Jeongguk looks at Jimin with a deadpan face. Maybe that was too much, but you smiled, and that’s something to Jimin. Even if he doesn’t know what to do to help, the least he can do is be there for you.
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(26) "this reminded me of u"
[03:15AM] namjoon: hehe [03:15AM] namjoon: this reminded me of u ^__^ [03:16AM] namjoon: [1 Image Attached]
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[03:20AM] y/n: there r no words….
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(27) allowing people to be human, with everything that this entails
University truly has been the best years of your life. There’ve been rough spots financially and mentally, but your key support system has been the circle of friends you’re proud to love and live with. Even when they’re a little bit chaotic, sometimes really annoying and loud and tiring, you still love them, and every quality that comes along with loving them.
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thetiredbiwrites · 5 years ago
Text
I didn’t even know you were seeing anyone Pt.3
Peter x sister!Reader Bucky x Reader
Summary: Peter finally convinces reader to tell Bucky about the baby
A/N: So.. I’m finally posting. Sorry it’s taken like a month to do this. End of summer work season was madness and I’ve just started back at Uni doing a masters after a year off (why the fuck have done this to myself? 😱😂). I also struggled with the last half of this but I’ve done what I can 😅
onechaoticbitch Yes, Bucky must know and now he does! :) @mad4oak  ‘spawn’ 🤣🤣  @raindancer2004 @onlythedustoftherabiola @galacticstxrdust (thanks for commenting guys)
Part 1  Part 2
Words: 1830
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You answered every question Peter had for the next two hours, work completely forgotten. He really did want to know everything. Well, not everything.
“You know you need to tell him, right?”
The tone got serious. You knew he was right. You had to tell Bucky, you couldn’t avoid him forever. Aside from the fact that you work/live in the same building, you couldn’t do it. You’d already avoided him for the last week and it was breaking you, you missed him.
“I know I do. But…I’m scared, Peter.”
Your voice got tight and you could feel your eyes burning, tears building. Telling Bucky was a terrifying thought. You couldn’t help the questions and fears that ran through your head. Bucky had adjusted amazingly over the last two years- a year in Wakanda before moving to the compound- but on occasion he still doubted himself. He still didn’t think he deserved all the good things he now had and was still worried he would hurt someone.
What if he didn’t want this? What if this set him back and undid the work he’d done? What if he left? Did he even want kids? Did he want them with you? Did he want you?
You were scared for him and yourself. Your worries and insecurities growing with each day. A new thought would pop up and stop you from replying to his texts or answering his calls.
“What are you scared of? Sounds like you guys really love each other.”
“But what if he doesn’t want this? What if he doesn’t want me?”
Your head dropped, looking at your lap as you nervously played with your fingers and silent tears slid down your face. In front of you, Peter sat shocked. He couldn’t fathom anyone knowing you and not wanting you in their life. You’ve been insecure since you were a teenager, but over the recent years you had become more confident and seeing you happy made Peter happy.
“Of course, he wants you! He’d be mad if he didn’t. You are the best person I know. You’re a smart, patient, caring, loving, badass, sarcastic, funny and awesome person. You’re amazing and, like the rest of us Parkers, beautiful.”
A small smile rested on your lips as you let out a short laugh, looking up at your brother. He sat with a smile, gesturing to his face with his hands to back up his statement.
Holding your hands in his, your little brother sent you a reassuring smile, “I am like 97% sure that he will not leave you. He is a good man and he clearly loves you. If he betrays that, then he’s in trouble. Aunt May will kick his ass back to the 40’s.”
You both laughed, imaging your Aunt beating the metal-armed, ex-assassin, super-soldier. And she would win.
Peter brushed some hair out of your face before placing a kiss on your forehead. Leaning back, he gave you a comforting smile before handing you your phone and leaving the lab.
--
Pacing the front room of your apartment, you bit your nails and ran your hand through your hair as you had been for the last 45 minutes. After Peter left, you had texted Bucky, asking him to come to your place to talk. He had replied immediately, letting you know he would be there at 8.
It was now 7.56 and you felt like you were going to pass out. Your heart was racing, and your head was screaming. You could only think the worst case. Bucky was going to walk out as soon as you told him.
As the clock ticked 7.59 there was a knocking on your door, freezing you in your tracks. The carpet grateful for a reprieve before you wore a hole straight through. Staring at the door with wide eyes, you took a deep shaking breath, and called for him to come in.
Wringing your hands together you hoped the smile on your face looked normal as Bucky closed the door and walked over to you in three quick strides, planting a quick but sweet kiss on your lips.“I’ve missed you. Are you ok? I haven’t heard from you in days.”
Bucky’s hands stayed on your arms, thumbs rubbing gentle circles, a habit he didn’t even realise he did but always calmed you. The warm look on his face, graced with a small smile and loving eyes made you melt. Everything about him screamed love for you and you hoped you weren’t imagining it as it gave you some confidence to tell him.
“Yeah, I’m ok, I just- I have to- I ne-“ you sighed, briefly closing your eyes before taking a deep breath. “Can we sit and talk?”
You gestured to the couch and Bucky nodded, looking both worried about this talk and concerned for you.
You sat in silence for what felt like hours but in reality was only 3 minutes. Playing with your fingers and looking into your lap, scared to look at Bucky even though you could feel his eyes on you, you tried to find the right words.
“Doll, you’re scaring me.” Bucky hesitantly spoke up, you were uncharacteristically quiet. You always had something to say, something to talk to him about. He could, would and has listened to you for hours, not always sure what you were talking about. Unless you were in the lab and concentrating on something, you could out-talk your brother.
“You know you tell me anything, right? You said you wanted to talk but you haven’t said-“
“I’m pregnant.” You cut Bucky off. So quietly you were surprised he heard you.
“What?”
“I’m pregnant” you repeated, louder but with a trembling voice. Your eyes burned, tears building, heart pounding deafeningly in your ears as you await his reaction.
His face held pure shock. Frozen with wide, unblinking eyes and mouth slightly ajar, you couldn’t get a read on him.
“Bucky-?”
“Pregnant?” his voice so quiet you only just caught it. His eyes flitted down to your stomach and back up to your face before he promptly stood up, a shaky had running through his hair.
“Oh my-. Pregnant. She’s pregnant. A baby-“ Bucky started talking to himself under his breath as he paced, not looking at you, while hands ran through his hair and over his face.“I can’t… I can’t have… I’m not… baby… father…”
You caught less and less of his conversation with himself as your own emotions bubbled over. He didn’t want this. He was going to leave. You were going to be alone. Your whole body shook as tears cascaded down your cheeks, lips trembling as you continued wringing your hands together, fingers gripping each other tightly.
Bucky stopped mid-sentence as a quiet sniffle and sharp intake of breath broke through his bubble. He snapped towards you, still in place on the couch, head down and hair curtaining your face, but he still knew you were crying, trying not to make a sound and start bawling. His heart broke looking at you and he promptly took his seat again.“Doll-“
You took a sharp breath, quickly wiping your tears, shaking your head and looking at him with a small smile you prayed didn’t look too forced. “It’s ok. It’s a lot, I know. It’s a big responsibility, we never talked about this. It’s a lot to ask and I never-“
You were cut off as Bucky place his hands over yours, stopping your assault on your hands as you dug your nails into your palms. Looking up at his face, his eyebrows were furrowed, eyes glued to you.
“You think I’m going to leave?” his quiet voice indignant at the insinuation.
“Well, I just-I. You, you might not, want this, or be ready. I know you’re still adjusting, and a baby is a big thing. I don’t want to put you in a bad position or pressure you. It’s a lot to ask and expect after everything you’ve been through. You’d also be stuck with me and I don’t want you to-“
“Stop.” His voice was firm but held no malice or anger. He moved closer to you, keeping one hand on yours, he used the other to lift your chin up, his thumb gently gliding over your bottom lip before holding your chin in place, preventing you from looking away.
“I’m not going anywhere. Ever. It is big. It’s huge and I’m not ready. But is anyone really ready? Are you?”
His hand moved to cup your cheek as he wiped away a tear. You leaned into his touch, not taking your eyes off him. “But just because I’m scared, and I have a list of worries the length of my arm, and growing, doesn’t mean I don’t want this. Meeting you is by far the best thing that has ever happened to me. I never thought I’d find someone like you. I’m far more adjusted and comfortable here because of you. I’ve been able to see a future for myself because of you and in every version is you. I wouldn’t be ‘stuck’ with you, doll. I want you. Both of you.”
He leaned in and kissed you, slowly and filled with love. You could taste the salt of your tears that ran freely down your face. Foreheads touching and eyes closed he whispered an ‘I love you’.
Looking at him through teary eyes you whispered back an ‘I’m sorry’. Leaning back, Bucky sent you a small, genuine smile as he moved a piece of hair out of your face.
“I shouldn’t have assumed. That wasn’t fair of me. I just got scared and irrational. I’m not ready either and I didn’t even know if you wanted kids or me in your life forever, we still haven’t even told the others we’re dating and-“
“That is irrational. Definitely ridiculous. You clearly need me to stay because you don’t realise how great you are. I need to be here to stop those thoughts from taking over and prove to you that you are perfect.”
Smiling, you looked away slightly. Bucky had been complimenting you and telling you how beautiful, or smart, or funny etc. you were since you met, but you still got shy. Some days you still found it unbelievable, but Bucky always made sure to make you feel like the most important person. He was always genuine and made you feel loved. How could you have doubted him?
“No one’s perfect” you muttered.
“Well you are pretty damn close.” He smiled, blue eyes taking in your face before he placed a kiss on your forehead.
You both rested back on the sofa, your head on Bucky’s chest as he ran his metal fingers through your hair, his other hand resting on your not-yet-showing stomach.
“Guess our secret relationship is over, we’ll have to tell everyone now.”
“Peter already knows.”
 “Of course he does” Bucky laughed, planting a kiss to the top of your head.
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far-off-flower-fields · 4 years ago
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Weird Questions that say a lot
1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans? Teacups!
2. chocolate bars or lollipops? Lollipops
3. bubblegum or cotton candy? Cotton candy
4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you? We call elementary school primary school. It depended which teachers you asked, my favourites always said I was “conscientious, kind, and a pleasure to have in class”.
5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? Glass cups or bottles.
6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? I have like 4 looks, pastel, boho, and goth/witchy/grunge, also vintage-inspired which wasn’t mentioned but I love it.
7. earbuds or headphones? Depends on the shape, I love my Razr headset because it doesn’t squash my ears, and I like galaxy bud shaped earbuds, the ones with the little rubber doo-dads that fit actually in your ear. Apple or a lot of older flat earbuds cause me a lot of pain.
8. movies or tv shows? TV shows. Movies are getting longer and longer and my focus is getting shorter and shorter
9. favorite smell in the summer? Rainy days!
10. game you were best at in p.e.? The game of queue-ducking (where you go to the back of the queue to avoid your turn), or dance, or the less strength intensive parts of gymnastics. Or crying, always been great at that xD
11. what you have for breakfast on an average day? Muesli, or nothing.
12. name of your favorite playlist? I prefer to listen to full albums rather than playlists, but I have a few favourites on Spotify. Born to Run 150BPM, Infinite Indie Folk, Irish Folk: Jigs and Reels, All Out 80s/90s/00s. I also love scene/pop-punk playlists.
13. lanyard or key ring? Key Ring
14. favorite non-chocolate candy? Message Hearts (or anything with that texture), the red pack of starbursts (the UK version is vegan). Does Turkish Delight count because if so then that is my fave. I also like gummies if they’re vegan.
15. favorite book you read as a school assignment? To Kill a Mockingbird (high school), or The Bloody Chamber (uni), or Hamlet (uni)
16. most comfortable position to sit in? One foot under me, the other foot out to the other side, but both in the same position (if the surface is flat), or knees up.
17. most frequently worn pair of shoes? I own a lot of shoes so there isn’t really a single pair I wear the most. Recently my Air Force 1s, I’m trying to wear them in because the previous owner didn’t so the cause blisters.
18. ideal weather? Cold, overcast, rainy, still. Or without the rain. or snow (as long as I’m not going in the car and I can go crunch my shoes in it xD
19. sleeping position? Either side, but my body is kinda rotated towards the bed so it’s like half way between on my stomach and on my side. 
20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? Notebooks
21. obsession from childhood? Animals, dinosaurs, goddesses, magic, crystals, neopets, sims. I still love all of these things, I am a rotating door of obsessions, usually a bunch of the same obsessions on repeat.
22. role model? I don’t have one particular role model, I do have tons of people that I love and respect.
23. strange habits? I have so many strange habits that I have become one myself. Nothing actually stands out though because 99% of it is because of my brain.
24. favorite crystal? rose quartz or moonstone.
25. first song you remember hearing? Maybe Dancing Queen by ABBA, definitely the first I remember dancing to, but my dad loves music so I grew up with a constant stream of it.
26. favorite activity to do in warm weather? Suffer xD when I’m able to do so comfortably I’d love to go out looking for pretty stones, and nice sticks with my fiance, also would like to go on picnics with him, or a friend if I had one.
27. favorite activity to do in cold weather? Baking, drawing, crafts, standing in the rain. Everything.
28. five songs to describe you? 6/10 - Dodie Robert Frost - Mal Blum Caught in the Middle - Paramore Side Effects - Jade Bird Snitches Get Stitches - Onsind  Bonus track: The Seed - Aurora I wish I still had the playlist I made of songs I relate to, several of these were on it though.
29. best way to bond with you? Oversharing, or telling me about things you’re into.
30. places that you find sacred? Nature. My favourite spots are little creeks/rivers in wooded areas, but just like, all of it is special and should be treated as such. Also bedrooms.
31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? I think maybe I’m not gutsy or whatever enough, but also unpredictable. I wear whatever I like, and I’m just as likely to cry in all of them as I am to accidentally get in a fight.
32. top favorite vines? I feel so basic because I never really did the vine thing.  There was one that nearly killed me because I literally started to choke that was in some kind of office and the bit like can you run this past me again, and they just fucking legged it past them holding a folder up, Saw it once, never saw it again. Road work ahead. Why you can’t lift a house (might be a tok?) Brass dad and oven kid Look at this graaaaph Never learned how to read I can’t sit I have hemorrhoids The one with the people in blankets bobbing the nana nanana song Fr esh avo ca do Look at all these chickens
33. most used phrase in your phone? I love you - if I had to guess
34. advertisements you have stuck in your head? right now, nothing. I often get the old Super Liquor jingle lodged in there though.
35. average time you fall asleep? 6am?
36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing? Charlie the unicorn or that one Noodles video by Cyanide and Happiness. Are those even memes?
37. suitcase or duffel bag? Depends. I mostly use a bag though since I never go anywhere for long.
38. lemonade or tea? Tea? Usually if you ask for lemonade here you get Sprite which is not lemonade.
39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie? I had a vegan lemon meringue pie once, so good. Cake is easier to make though, and I can eat more in one sitting without getting sick xD
40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? Um, the principal in my last year of school got caught for being a peeping tom a few years after I left.
41. last person you texted? My Fiance.
42. jacket pockets or pants pockets? Jacket pockets
43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket? Depends on the rest of the outfit and the weather. I wear Jean jackets most though.
44. favorite scent for soap? I love lavender, or vanilla/candy/fruity/baked goods type scents. I still have a bottle of Sugar Fairy spray from lush from a year ago and I love the smell of that.
45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero? Fantasy I think.
46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in? Nekkid?
47. favorite type of cheese? As a kid it was feta. Now I only eat vegan cheese. I was never a huge cheese fan tbh.
48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be? Rotten xD um probably a cranberry or something because I’m small, and I’m not a fan of cranberry.
49. what saying or quote do you live by? An it harm none do what you will. Or treat others as you wish to be treated.
50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have? Probably one of the vines I listed above, either “run it past” or “can’t lift a house” because both of those resulted in crying and choking.
51. current stresses? My cat has been throwing up and having diarrhoea the past week or so, she’s been to the vet, it got better for a bit, but tonight suddenly got worse. Living with my parents who I have a very toxic relationship with. Living in a single very overfilled room. Trying to not spend money so that I can save up to move next year. Nightmares about my trauma. Either the house is haunted or there’s a build up of negative energy (probably that).
52. favorite font? I always liked the look of all of the script style fonts (freestyle, french, lucida, lucida calligraphy, Edwardian, Palace) but they’re not accessible so for anything people will actually see (which is literally nothing) I always go with arial.
53. what is the current state of your hands? Slight rash on one finger because I’m sensitive to what is in a lot of hand washing products apparently (never an issue until the pandemic), one broken finger nail that is a bit shorter than the rest. Not painted nails because energy. I always wear my engagement ring, usually I wear several other rings but with how my skin is being I thought I’d better not for a while.
54. what did you learn from your first job? Bakeries are hell, my circadian rhythm will not adjust to anything besides its natural state for longer than a couple of days at a time no matter how long or hard I try. I can absolutely fall asleep standing up.
55. favorite fairy tale? Ugly Duckling
56. favorite tradition? I don’t have anyway... Yet? Hopefully when I move this can become a thing.
57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? I’m interpretting overcome loosely here, meaning “I have not died from this” - Suicide of my first love - Bullying - 3 different jobs that all nearly killed me
58. four talents you’re proud of having? Literally can’t think of one. I’m not talented. I’m passable at a couple of things, but I worked for those things and I’m still not good enough for anyone to confuse me for being talented xD Those things I care about that I’ve worked on a lot are singing, art, languages, crafts? I still struggled to come up with 4. My bad.
59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? Aw jeez xD
60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? Magical Girl! This is an easy one, give me the powers and the clothes yessss.
61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.? Literally sitting here drawing a blank, so instead of favourite here is the first one that came into my head “eyes are the genitals of the head” (may have that wrong, I’m watching the Office for the first time rn)
62. seven characters you relate to? Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Amelie from Amelie Matilda from Matilda Quasimodo from the Hunchback of Notredame (also my favourite plush as a kid) Iris - The Holiday Jess - New Girl Amelia Shepherd - Grey’s Anatomy Struggled with this because suddenly I drew a blank and also couldn’t remember who my Fiance was talking about every time he’s watched a character and said “that’s you” repeatedly.
63. five songs that would play in your club? Starlight - Superman Lovers Pump It - Black Eyed Peas I Bet that You Look Good on the Dancefloor - Arctic Monkeys All the Things She Said - tATu Doctor Jones - Aqua Bonus: Push Up - Freestylers These are ones  I have memories of dancing to when I was younger so that’s how I picked, but I’d absolutely be a themed night club with different music on different nights.
64. favorite website from your childhood? Neopets, which I still play daily. The first I played was MaMaMedia, then Bubblegum Club.
65. any permanent scars? That’s a SORE subject heh get it heh
66. favorite flower(s)? Lavender, rose, peony
67. good luck charms? I usually carry gemstones if I’m needing to be particularly lucky, or sigils.
68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? I hate anything spicy. I had rootbeer candy that tasted like literal dirt. I can’t eat banana stuff without gagging and getting a headache. I hate anything that is artificial blackberry or blackcurrant, tastes like shitty cough syrup.
69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned? Sea Monkeys breathe through their feet, but I remember where I learned that.
70. left or right handed? right
71. least favorite pattern? depends entirely on the colours, I like patterns. but certain stripes do make my eyes feel funny.
72. worst subject? If PE counts, then that. If not, math.
73. favorite weird flavor combo? I love pineapple on pizza but that’s not weird. Iused to eat cheese and jam sandwiches as a kid though.
74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen? I operate on how long it has lasted instead of how bad it is, essentially I get so desperate so I’ll try it even though it probably won’t help. I have the resistance of a rhino to most meds.
75. when did you lose your first tooth? No idea, like 4 I think? I did keep them in a weird little box for no reason though because they never got taken away from under my pillow.
76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)? I’m a fan of a good mash if it has lots of flavour (like gravy). Otherwise, crisps or fries.
77. best plant to grow on a windowsill? I grew a radish once! Something cat safe though these days, also maybe something heavy, and hard to knock over?
78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store? Grocery Store sushi, if it’s just veg.
79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo? My only ID is my passport, and it is BAD.
80. earth tones or jewel tones? Both.
81. fireflies or lightning bugs? Fireflies (ten million of them to be precise)
82. pc or console? Grew up with PC. Now play my switch mostly.
83. writing or drawing? Both. Wrote more as a kid, draw more now.
84. podcasts or talk radio? Podcasts.
84. barbie or polly pocket? Both. But I prefered pollies as a kid
85. fairy tales or mythology? mythology
86. cookies or cupcakes? cupcakes
87. your greatest fear? Based on my nightmares, stairs.
88. your greatest wish? To live in a comfy house, in the country, with my Fiance, I have travelled the world, we have pets, I can function, we are free.
89. who would you put before everyone else? My Fiance and out animals.
90. luckiest mistake? Can’t think of any, most of my mistakes have been more like bad choices, also never turned out well for me.
91. boxes or bags? Depends what it’s for?
92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights? lamps, or fairy lights. Unless I’m particularly anxious, then overheads.
93. nicknames? None.
94. favorite season? Winter
95. favorite app on your phone? LINE, it has my fiance, and animated stickers.
96. desktop background? Little Twin Stars
97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized? My own.
I never get asks and needed to distract myself so I’m going to just answer these anyway, like a survey or something. Original post by tr33-g1rl 
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carotriesstudy · 6 years ago
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When you’re not doing well at uni and failing
okay, i know im not the best at keeping this blog bc its like not a physical thing so i forget i have it lol
but i wanted to just talk a little and vent bc of my life is pretty shit atm (the tips at the start are written post rant to actually give some advice instead of just venting)
Tip 1 - get out of bed
I know its hard, I could spend my life in bed and tbh I do. but I also know that while it feels like taking care of yourself to relax, I know it’ll make me more depressed. and it's super hard. I constantly tell myself to get up while lying there an entire day. but when you feel that little spur of energy or in my case annoyance lol use it. get up and get out. 
Tip 2 - get out of your room
this is similar to tip 1 but if you find yourself in lack of motivation or energy go somewhere. take a walk, or go study in a library or cafe. and this can be even harder. having to get dressed? maybe interact with people? are you kidding me? but the minute you get out and even when you interact with people it feels better. you aren't holed up in your depression or whatever might be bothering you. 
Tip 3 - it’s okay and it’s going to be better
right now it's shit. and it feels like its never going to get better. and that you're stuck in this rut forever. but things will turn even if you don't want them to. there can be a comfort and security in your depression bc it gives a reason to why it feels like its right. but you know what also feels like that? the good, and hopefully there will be more of those. 
Tip 4 - do as much as you can handle
it's easy to not do things. I haven't done anything all semester. and it sucks bc it's biting me in the ass now. and it's not like I don't have the time. I just don't have the energy. so when I have the energy I need to remember that reading 3 pages of assigned reading is still better than none. I go to class even if I'm not paying attention bc it gets me up and out but also it gives a good idea of what I need to focus on etc.
Tip 5 - its okay to “give up”
i dont like the phrase giving up that much bc it sounds like defeat. i am in a process of severly considering not starting again next semester bc of my mental health. its serious consideration. but its one i need to make and if i decide not to go, it doesnt mean i gave up, i just realised that my current situation iisnt good and that i need to change stuff before i can continue instead of wasting my time doing a shit job at an expensive uni. so, thats good. figuring out what works and what doesnt is only a positive thing
today im in a somewhat good mood despite learning i failed my stats exam (dw its not bad we have multiple so i can still pass)
but the thing is, i have been in a very bad place or a long time and it has really been affecting me and by extension also my education.
i feel apathetic towards everything, im uninterested, and the stress and obligatoin feel i used to really on to study isnt kicking in anymore due to the apathy
im constantly tired, i cant get out o bed in the morning and we have madatory attendance (which probably is good bc otherwise i wouldnt be going to class probably)
my concentration and attention is somewhere completely different atm and its been weeks like this (usually its a few days) and i cant control it very well and its making it hard for me to study and pay attention
im letting myself slip, my room is slipping, my health is slipping
while im trying to get better and be more social which is easier than studying bc usually its just me and this one friend getting high and watching stupid videoes which is nice bc its a break to feel happy and entertained but its also not good for me
back to school stuff since this is a study blog
im no doing good in any of my classes, i barely passed two exams, failed one and possibly one more
i have an exam on friday i need to study for, and one on monday. i neeed good grades in these to make up for the not so good marks i have received before
and while i know that taking care of your mental health is more important not feeling like doing academic work is bothering me a lot actually and its a hellish circle of poor mental health leads to poor academic performance which then leads to poor mental health
and while my apathy and alexithymia saves me from feeling sad or upset by my grades i know deep down i want to do well. i want to succeed. 
i cant keep not working, i need to put in work if i wanna improve. this isnt high school anymore
im doing some hard courses this semester and while i am usually interested in most of them i cant seem to care 
im doing better today mentally and i feel up for getting some stuff done so im going to exploit that but i also just want to sleep and wake up feeling actually awake for once
im also getting sick so thats fun
my parents are also making me see a therapist (i haven't started yet) and i think thats a good idea but i have a lot of anxiety about it lol hence why i need therapy 
im also going to talk to counsellor at school and see what she can help with as well
idk what id going to happen but im trying to finish my semester and get back into a good study rhythm. I anyone wants to throw some advice or encouragement my way id really appreciate it.
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niallsfoolsgold · 6 years ago
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Thin Walls and Fireworks
it’s been months since i last posted any work and i’m really sorry for that, i just haven’t been feeling my writing. this story is probably filled with typos because i haven’t edited it yet, and i have really mixed feeling about the whole thing (mainly the ending). thanks for reading at your own risk!
(not my gif!)
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There are three things you should know about Emery before you really start reading this: 1. She wakes up at exactly 7:13 am every morning (she has literally timed how long it takes her to get ready and get to uni so that she can get a maximum amount of sleep every night while still having five extra minutes in case a traffic jam happens). 2. She listens to her spotify playlist specifically made for her morning showers everyday and she sings along because it helps her wake herself up faster. 3. The walls in her apartment are extremely thin. She quickly found the third thing out when she consistently heard music—different guitars and pianos mainly—blasting throughout her home at 1 a.m. within the first month she lived there. She tossed and turned on the frigid December night, and prayed to whatever god there was that the music would quiet down. Yeah... her prayers went unanswered.
She was annoyed to say the least. Her boss had called about an hour ago and said that she would have to work the next day after she had asked for one day off after working every day for the past three weeks. So she had pulled her thick grey comforter over her shoulders to hide the fact that she wasn’t wearing a bra, pushed her glasses up onto the bridge of her nose, and took a quick glance in the mirror to make sure that she didn’t look too hideous. After that, she trudged her way out her door and down the carpeted hall, hoping that whoever lived next door wasn’t a complete asshole—her old neighbors in her previous apartment were which was one of the contending reasons for her moving elsewhere. She raised her hand to knock on the door, and mentally stopped herself, taking a deep breath and wondering what the fuck she was going to say. She hadn’t mentally prepared enough to meet someone new, especially not if they were rude, but she knocked on the door anyways; softly, but hard enough that it would be heard even through the music. When the door opened up, it was not what she expected, not at fucking all. Standing there was a tall, decently-muscular-well-built, gorgeous, greek god of a looking guy. He looked like the type of person she would allow to stab her twenty times if he asked nicely; hell, she would let him stab her even if he was rude. And if she wasn’t already ashamed of how messy she looked before she had seen this guy—it didn’t help that she remembered her landlord mentioning that he was famous—she really was now. “Can I help you with something?” She’s pretty sure he has the most angelic speaking voice she’s ever heard. He literally seems like he could possibly be a walking angel, coming second in the “perfection” genre only to Jesus Christ himself (she only thinks that because she’s almost certain that Jesus must’ve been decently perfect... being the son of God and all). She feels like she’s almost lost her voice, like she’s all choked up and unable to breathe just at the sight of this guy. Her eyebrows are raised only in the slightest before her lips begin moving and words are created. “Um—yes actually,” she speaks softly, “I really don’t mean to be rude or come off as pushy in any rude way, b—“ She’s cut off before she can even finish, but she doesn’t even care because she’s cut off by a breath of laughter from him before he looks back up at her. “It’s the loud music mixed with the thin walls, yeah? I’m really sorry about that. I’ve been gone since you moved in I guess so I’m not used to having a neighbor,” he spoke. She nods her head lightly at him. “That’s exactly it, actually. I’m sorry for asking,” she begins, “it’s just that I’ve got a early shift in the morning and rest is needed, ya know?” “It’s fine, don’t worry,” he offers another polite smile, and fuck, she nearly melts like a popsicle on the Fourth of July. She mutters “goodnight” to him and he does the same back as she’s turning to speed walk back to her apartment down the hall. Her heart feels like it’s about to beat out of her chest. *** Emery had a long day so far. That’s really all she wanted to say about it; it had just been a really fucking long day. It started out by thinking she overslept, and therefore freaking out about being late for work, only to find out that her boss had forgotten to tell her that her shift had changed to a night shift and she didn’t have to be in until five this evening. That threw her incredibly off track for the days activities. She went from there to get some last minute things from the store that she forgot when she had done her grocery shopping, but she realized in the checkout isle that she had left her wallet at her place and all she had was about $7 in her pocket. She decided to use that money to buy some coffee to wake her up, but then some asshole bumped into her in the shop and spilled her coffee all over her white shirt, and then proceeded to yell at her like it was her fault. And fuck, by the end of all this happening, it was only ten in the morning. So yes, she was absolutely batshit pissed at how fucking terribly her day had been going. She had finally managed to make it back to her apartment and wanted nothing more than a hot shower to relax her, and then maybe take a nap before going to work later on. She slings her jacket onto the dining table and kicked her shoes off by the front door. She really didn’t even bother to get clothing to change into in the bathroom (living alone really had its perks; she could walk around naked if she pleased, just not on the balcony, and not with the curtains opened). Stripping herself from her clothes and making sure the water was the right temperature beforehand, she hopped into the shower with her bad day playlist that’s titled “for your stressed-out-bitchy days”. She hummed along softly, singing the words softly as she got farther into the song. She was really confused when she started hearing singing from the other side of the wall; singing the exact words at the same time she was. Shawn—her devilishly handsome neighbor—was someone that she had only talked to a few times since she had asked him to turn his music down a couple of weeks earlier. He was nice, literally almost always. She had never seen him in a bad mood, and he often talked to her if they happened to get into the elevator at the same time, or if they passed each other in the hallway. He asked simple questions about her, like how old she was, how long she had lived here, stuff like that. In some cases it could have been weird, but he seemed nice enough and simply a friendly person. There was no doubt in her mind that her greek god of a neighbor could actually hear her, but it made her giggle just a bit when he had even joined to sing along (although it wasn’t that surprising since she had recently learned from her landlord that the reason he was famous was for singing). It was dumb that something as stupid as her next door neighbor singing along to her music—who we can’t forget is absolutely gorgeous—made her day seem a little bit better than it was before. She dries the wet drips of water off of her body with the white, fluffy, hotel-like towels that she loves more than her own life. Everything was quiet when the music was off. No more singing through the thin walls with Shawn, just quiet. In all honesty, she was kind of happy for the quiet, even though his voice was still kind of angelic. It had been such a long ass day, she was just ready to lie down before going to work. So after drying her body off and changing into her most comfortable items of clothing—her favorite pair of leggings and a sweatshirt that was much too large for her—she crawled into her bed, turned on her most relaxing music, and drifted off to sleep. *** Words are unable to describe how much she dreaded to go to work later on that evening after she woke up. It was still a bit rushed getting ready for work, but thank fuck that the owner of the bar was chill and her work attire consisted of jeans and a black shirt (of any kind, just no graphics), and having her hair up. After changing and slipping on her favorite coat, she put her hair up, put on one of the best faces of makeup she probably ever had in a short amount of time—honestly though, her eyeliner is on fucking point—and left with her keys and purse in hand. The backdoor to the bar squeaked a little bit when Y/N opened it up, setting her things in her designated shelf that the manager had bought so that the employees things wouldn’t be unorganized and disheveled everywhere. Her name tag was on the same shelf and she pinned it onto her shirt after taking her coat off. “Hey darlin’,” one of the workers, Tess, spoke to her, Tess’ sweet southern accent dripping from her lips. Tess was a twenty-something year old girl that had moved from Georgia in order to try be closer with her dad (her parents had divorced when she was young, and she had always described her mother as “a backstabbing, no good, pussy-ass-bitch, who deserves to choke on her boy toy’s dick”... she really has a way with words, okay?-). Tess had been there for Y/N since they had started working together, the both of them becoming close friends quickly due to not knowing another soul within a hundred miles. They weren’t necessarily sisters, more like each other’s favorite cousins at family reunions; they gossiped about other people, shared problems, and talked about the cutest guys and girls (because honestly fuck people who say you can’t love who you want to) that came in and spilled all the tea about each interaction with said guys. (Tess actually has a girlfriend named Margot, but honestly the two in the relationship knew that Tess was a natural flirt and couldn’t stop herself even if she tried, despite the both of them being very in love with one another.) “Hey love,” she responded, giving a small grin to the girl that she adored. Tess gave a small wink in return, making Emery’s grin grow wider. The bar wasn’t very busy right now, but that was mainly because it was only five o’clock and most people were just now getting off work while Emery was just getting started. It was weird to have a working schedule like that, and it sucked ass when it came to studying during the school year. But once again, her manager, Mark, was pretty chill—besides the times when it was obvious that the place was going to be busy, just like on Friday nights like this one—and allowed her to get off in time or come in late, just so that she could get some of her school work done. The first two hours of her seven hour shift were brought as hell. People shuffled in and out, maybe buying a drink or two, and then leaving immediately after paying. It annoyed her that people did that sometimes. If people were only going to buy one drink, then why not just buy a bottle of whatever they wanted from the store? Then they would be able to have one drink every night for a long time. She was certainly surprised when Shawn walked in the bar, a couple of guys following him in and she assumed they were probably his friends. They were all laughing about something that must have been said outside and cracking more jokes to go along with it. She did her best to ignore all of it—more specifically just all of them in general because she refused to get internally flustered with Shawn like she had when they first met—and went back to combining some of the partly used alcohol bottles with others. It was boring but it would also maybe get her out of socializing with someone that made her really fucking nervous for no reason. She almost did it too, almost got away with pretending to be distracted until— “Hey, neighbor.” She looked up from the two bottle in hand and nearly choked on thin air. There he was, Shawn, looking fine as hell and all he was doing was standing there. “I didn’t know you worked here,” he commented again. She placed she bottles on the bar and leaned against it, fake confidence taking over he features. “If you come here often then I’m not sure how. But then again, I’ve worked here for seven months this and this is the first time I can remember seeing you around,” she replies. Her cold hands were so close to shaking but she did her best to still them. “Hmm,” he hummed, “Well this is the first time I’ve been home for more than a couple days in about seven months, and I didn’t know about this place up until one of my friends,” he paused, turning around and pointing to one of the guys in the group that walked in with him, “told us all about it last month.” She raised her eyes at his comment, slowly nodding her head once, letting him know that he must’ve been correct. He doesn’t say anything else, just looks at her for a minute and now she’s really fucking nervous with her fake confidence fading away into a imaginary black hole. “Oka—Uh, well do you guys want anything to drink, or are you just really wanting some conversation?” she’s freaking the hell out inside. She wonders how she got those eighteen words out of her mouth. He nods, looking back at his group and does a quick count of how many people were in it before turning back. “Just 6 beers is all.” When she takes the tray of beers to the table he and his friends are sitting at, she can her them laughing again, and the doubt makes her wonder if they’re laughing at her or at something else, but she hopes it’s the latter. She gives a quick smile as she places the dark glass bottles in the table before turning around and going back to behind the bar. *** The night didn’t seem to last long enough. Contrary to what she had assumed, the shift she worked tonight wasn’t that bad. It was filled, but not overcrowded—despite it being New Year’s eve, but then again, most people were at clubs instead of actual bars—which made her job eighty-five percent easier than usual. Plus, most of the people didn’t care how long they waited; they were just waiting for the year of suffering to be over with. Shawn and his friends ended up moving to the actual bar counter and made conversation with her while she made drinks. They had all been curious to know what it was like living next to Shawn, to which she responded with “fine, besides him blasting music late at night when I have to work the next morning.” He had playfully rolled his eyes at that, to which she winked at him when no one else was paying attention (and fuck when that happened she was so confused because where the hell did that little bit of confidence come from?). That’s what the entire night consisted of; laughter, questions, and subtle flirting between Shawn and Emery. A pang if disappointment came inside her when they announced they were leaving after only about an hour and half of staying, but it felt a little better when they had promised to come back, and even better when Shawn winked at her on his way out the front door. She did her best to clean up as fast as fucking possible in order to get back to her apartment, promising Tess that she would do everything in her power to stay awake long enough tonight to call her and tell her why and how she knew the “super hot famous dude that looks like he could be a fuck boy but is most hopefully not” (a.k.a. Shawn). She knew she drove fast on the way back; and it wasn’t to see Shawn even though she almost hoped that he would blast his music loudly again so that she could go over and just see his face again, but he didn’t. He was pretty quiet, actually, and she almost thought there was a possibility that he wasn’t even home until she heard faint humming from the other side of the wall. She smiled, rolling her eyes at the fact that he seemed to love music so much that he couldn’t go without listening to some for of it (even if it was himself) for more than an hour. But the humming didn’t seem to stop, and then music was turned on, and then the music was turned up just enough to keep her awake. Her feet patted across the tiled floor and into her her slides, the top half of her body engulfed in a hoodie that was much too large for her, her hair falling loosely and messily, and her face clean and free of makeup. She knocked on his own door, and it swung open almost instantly. He was still dressed in the same clothing from earlier, looked almost the exact same, but his eyes were a little bit more soft and sleepy (basically just fucking adorable, but what’s new?). All he had to do to know what she needed was look at the slightly raised eyebrow; it was the same look she wore just a couple of nights ago. Emery opens her mouth but Shawn beats her to it, “Turn the music down?” There’s a small smirk on his face. She slowly blinks with a nod. “You got it,” he says. She turns around to walk back to her place with her hands in the pockets of her black Adidas sweatpants when he catches her attention again with his voice. “Hey, um,” he pauses and she turns to face him again, “fuck, this may sound really weird and kinda creepy ‘cause we’ve only talked like, I don’t know maybe five time, but do you wanna come in?” She raises her eyebrows at him with the tiniest grin at how nervous he seems to be with his rambling. If this is how she is, then she really understands why he seems to be smiling at her so much, but she doubts she’s actually this cute while doing it. “It’s just that it’s New Year’s Eve, and I have no idea if you’re alone, maybe you’ve already got people or a person at your place, but I know that it sucks to be alone because you see everyone together and shit... but if you are alone, you’re welcome to come over. Only if you want to, obviously,” he rambling again and she doesn’t even bother to hide the little grin that’s growing on her face. “Yeah,” he looks at her with his eyebrows raised just a little bit. “I’d love to come over. Let me grab my phone and I’ll be right back?” He nods and she practically speed walks back to her place, grabbing her phone from her room and going back out the door, but not before looking in her little mirror to make sure she looked at least somewhat decent. Fuck, she was freaking out. *** Emery decided that Shawn is possible her favorite person now (and for sure her favorite celebrity, even though she knows he’s so much more than that). It was a little half past eleven, and both Emery and Shawn were half drunk/a little tipsy on an unknown type of champagne that Emery insisted was amazing—and obviously Shawn trusts her word on alcohol because she’s a fucking bartender. It’d be weird if she didn’t know—and Shawn just happened to have a bottle of it. They were giggling at the stupidest things, sitting next to but facing each other on Shawn’s sectional, and waiting for the ball drop in New York. “Wait, wait, wait. You’re telling me that your brother was choking on a lego, and you didn’t do anything about it?” “I was five, Shawn! I didn’t know what to fucking do!” Emery exclaims back. “Plus, he was fifteen years old, he knew better than that anyways.” He shakes his head at her jokingly and she looks up at him. “What about you?” she takes a sip of the sparkling drink from her glass. “Do you have any siblings?” She can see his eyes light up slightly when she asks him this. “Yeah, a little sister. Her name’s Aaliyah, she’s five years younger than me, and she’s fifty times more awesome than myself,” he chuckles. Emery smiles at how much he seems to care about her, even if he’s hardly talked about her. She’s about to open her mouth to say something when cheering from the tv that was mounted up on the wall erupted, taking the attention of both of them. It was the countdown. She started mouthing the numbers along with all the people in New York, shifting in her seat to get a better look while Shawn does the same, the ball slowly dropping until— “3... 2... 1...” and suddenly everyone went crazy. A smile take over her face and she looks over to Shawn, and it almost seems like he might have been looking at her already, but it’s hard to tell because it’s dark and she’s still a little drunk. She does know one thing though, he’s smiling back at her, and he’s a little drunk too. “Happy New Year,” she smiles, her voice is quiet and soft and sweet. And once again, even though she a little intoxicated off of champagne of all things, she thinks she might melt when he smiles drunkenly right back at her. “Happy New Year.” She wants to kiss him just a little bit. She’s not really sure if that’s because she drunk, because he pretty, or maybe because she’s had a little crush on him for a while, even though she doesn’t know everything about like some girls do. But she knows that she wants to know him like that. She wants to know his favorite color, and how much cream and sugar he puts in his coffee (or if he does at all). She want to know why he plays music so fucking loud, and if he likes sunrises or sunsets more. Fuck she just want to know it all, because this crush she’s got is so fucking big, and she want to have it even after she knows these things. But she doesn’t kiss him, because she remembers that she was supposed to call Tess when she got home, and that was about an hour and a half ago. So she pushes her self up from the couch, and she stumbles just a bit but catches herself. “I should probably go,” she says. “I was supposed to call Tess, so she could be freakin out.” Shawn just nods, and she wants to say he looks disappointed, but like it was said earlier, she’s a little drunk and it’s really dark. He stands up too, walking her to the door and even going as far as “walking her home” even though her apartment was only about fifteen to twenty feet down the hall. They stood outside of her door, his hands in his pockets while she fiddled around with her keys (her door had an automatic lock on it; safety first obviously). She finally managed to get the door unlocked, opening it slightly, then turning slightly to wish him goodnight, and that’s when they both realize how close they actually are to each other. Her breath gets caught in her lungs just a little, and she can see that his breathing has increased. They’re both nervous, at least nervous enough, and seems like years pass with how close they’re standing to each other while the both stare at each other, eyes only flicking to each other’s lips when the other isn’t paying attention. He’s the one that leans down, and she knows that she can’t be imagining it, because when his lips meet hers it’s like the New Years fireworks have started all over again, and she’s freaking out. It’s soft, and slow, and she feels like she’s dying inside, but only in the best way possible. But then he pulls away, and she’s a little disappointed, but at the same time she can’t be. She offers another small smile, and he gives one back, and their both muttering “goodnight” to each other at the same time while blushing profusely. Next thing she knows, she’s shutting her door door with a heavy sigh, but a huge smile on her face. And all of this is because Emery has a huge fucking crush on her greek god of a neighbor that blasts music through the thin walls.
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curatedjournal-blog · 6 years ago
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World Mental Health Day - Some thoughts for students
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So, likelihood is you’ve seen these before or they don’t matter/apply to you BUT in the off chance that you may need to hear it today, tomorrow, yesterday or 5 years from now let me tell you a few things about self-care and dealing with ill mental health not just as a student but as a human being.
DISCLAIMER/WARNING: I have been on and off depression and anxiety meds for the past 5+ years, have been through counselling, CBT, you name it. Also, some of this may be TRIGGERING so please be kind to yourself and stop/don’t start reading it if it feels wrong or painful. Also, these are as much for me as they are for others so there’s that...
1. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Sadly, all around the world, ill mental health is misunderstood, mocked and disregarded by many. Sometimes you may not be able to find support in your family or friends. Often not because they don’t want to support you but because they don’t understand what you are going through. However, there are multitudes of online and offline communities that can help for free and with no strings attached (I don’t want to recommend any service in particular for personal reasons but Google
can be a great friend in these cases. Also, your school/uni often has free psychological support for students).
2. Stress and anxiety are more common among students than you think. The pressure can be awful and it comes from all sides - family, money, professors, yourself. It sucks. Which is why you NEED to...
3. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. Dude, self-care is everywhere these days. In a way, it almost lost it’s meaning! What is it really? Going on a shopping spree? Having a spa day? Exercising? Eating your favourite snack? Watching an episode of your fave show? All of the above? Well...
4. ONE SIZE DOESN’T FIT ALL. For me self-care is not binge watching Netflix as a way to avoid my to-dos, not letting shit accumulate, staying moderately on top of things and not kicking myself in the ass if I don’t. It’s also practicing kundalini yoga as OFTEN as I REMEMBER, journalling WHEN I feel like it, engaging in a hobby for 5 MINS to take my head of things, cooking a healthy meal IF I have time, etc.
5. SELF-CARE DOESN’T HAVE TO COST MONEY. Students are broke, we ain’t got no money (or time) for expensive massages and weekend yoga retreats. There’s so many free stuff that DOES NOT REQUIRE A SUBSCRIPTION which you can engage in to help you relax. Find a free exhibition to visit on a weekend, go to the local library and read a couple of soothing poems, go for a walk in the park (I’m a big believer in FOREST THERAPY). Also, if that’s your thing, youtube has LOTS of free self-care content: yoga classes, guided meditations, tips, soothing music...
6. If you’re STUCK IN A RUT, motivation doesn’t come, you can’t face leaving your bed because you fear something awful will happen well, I’m sorry but I’ll give you some tough love... Motivation won’t come. You have to do the thing even if you don’t feel
like it or are scared to do it. Likelihood is it’s not that big of a deal once you get started so... Take the first step (also, look into BEHAVIOURAL ACTIVATION a tried and true CBT technique).
7. EAT ONE FROG A DAY. You know that awful, anxiety inducing shit task you’ve been post-poning for ages that lingers in the back of your mind, eating at you and your sanity, neuron by neuron? Just get it over with. It won’t get any easier to do so may as well do it now and at least you can tick one off.
8. Frogs come in every size and SMALL WINS ARE IMPORTANT. Maybe your frog is making your bed in the morning or getting up before 7am or doing the dishes. Small victories accumulate and will make you feel accomplished step by step, no matter how small that step is. This can REALLY IMPROVE YOUR MOOD. Also, small frogs can easily become major frogs the more you put them off.
9. If it applies to you, TAKE YOUR MEDS and REMEMBER YOUR REPEAT PRESCRIPTIONS. Many times have I forgotten to take mine or reorder them to then feel like shit and completely useless for a week. What works for me may not work for you but here are my tips anyway - keep a water bottle and your meds by your bed next to your alarm clock/phone so you take them first thing when you wake up. Keep some extra meds in your bag so that IF you forget to take them then you have them with you and can easily get on top of it as soon as you realise.
10. KEEP HYDRATED. Honestly, I get majorly moody if I haven’t been drinking enough and it’s good for you eiter way so, do it!
11. BE ACCOUNTABLE. Find a buddy to help you keep in check (if you don’t have regular medical appointments or therapy sessions). Someone who you can talk to about how things are going or share experiences. Hey, I’m here if you’re desperate for a bud!
12. TRY TO DEVELOP AND KEEP A ROUTINE. Developing new habits takes a lot of effort and time. So it’s gonna be hard and you’ll feel like you want to give up and just hide under your covers (again, I speak from experience). Try and visualise what you’d like your daily routine to be - write it down, monitor it daily and if you fail try again...
13. TOMORROW IS A NEW DAY and a new chance to do things better. Try again and again until you succeed. And don’t beat yourself up everytime things don’t go exactly the way you want them to...
14. FOCUS ON POSITIVES. Remember those small wins? Write them down at the end of the day (or simply go over them in your mind). Keep a gratitude journal - as cliche as it sounds, remembering the good things at the end of a shit day will help you go to bed on a good note. I once heard of a lady who kept a journal where she only wrote positive things - all the negative crap she left out - I think that’s a great idea and something I am eager to try.
15. DECLUTTER FOR 5 MINS EACH DAY. A clean space makes for a clean mind. I always feel more anxious and moody if my space is messy.
16. EMBRACING MINIMALISM CAN HELP. Having lots of things doesn’t equal happiness or peace of mind. Lots of things create clutter and chaos and, in my case, mind clutter and anxiety.... which is why I’m currently actively trying to be more conscious about my possessions and purchases.
17. LEARN TO SAY NO. A lot of students in this community are perfectionists, overachieving, ambitious young people. It’s very easy to be seduced by cool opportunities, collabs, requests, invitations... Think twice before saying yes - can you realistically do what you are agreeing to? Will it contribute to your anxiety? Will it truly be beneficial for you? Be a bit selfish if you have to. It’s okay to focus on your wellbeing.
18. DON’T LET IMPOSTER SYNDROME TAKE THE REIGNS. We’ve all been there: I don’t deserve this, I’m not good enough, everyone else is smarter, I CAN’T DO THIS. Yes you can! Tell that voice to shut up. Say it in front of the mirror everyday: I AM ENOUGH AND I CAN DO THIS.
19. BREAK THINGS DOWN. Instead of writing on your to do list “clean bedroom”, break it down into as small tasks as possible: “pick up clothes from floor”, “change bedding”, “organise books”, “dust surfaces”, “vacuum”, etc.
20. ASK FOR HELP. I end it as I begun it. When it gets too hard, reach out. Whether it’s a close friend or an anonymous support line you don’t have to go through it alone. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, YOUR LIFE MATTERS.
YOU ARE UNIQUE AND AMAZING AND YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO OFFER.
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