#because we were so incomparably different and I’ve realized a lot of them kinda didn’t treat me/others well

[lesbiansanemi]

I need to Get Out of the Midwest. I think it’s draining me of all life and energy like some kind of regional soul-sucking vampire

[jackbabewang]

At first sight...

Pairing: Jaehyun x Reader Genre: College au, Fluff, That library crush theme Word Count: 2,554

It can be hard to seduce someone in total silence.

Final exams are approaching, so now you are spending a great deal of time in one corner of your room at a clustered study desk, constantly reviewing notes, and grumbling. There are just too many distractions to interrupt you at the dormitory. The residents above are deliberately harassing you by stomping on the floor, classical music blasted from the room next to yours making your unit feel like some strange musical theater of the absurd and then there is your bed. So so inviting. You have enough points going into the exams to pass easily, but the pressure has not lifted because you are keen to scoring the highest possible marks. Well, that is just you being you. To pry yourself away from disturbance, the university’s library seems to be the ideal place for better concentration. And so, your routine begins.

Day 1

Unknowingly excited. Your nerdy self got a seating in a booth that offers the most privacy. Though the library is crowded with students studying frantically, it is still quiet. Your body sinking into the cushioned padding, laptop opened, bookmarks orphaned on tables, highlighters and pens began their labour. 

Day 3

Still going strong. Probably. You need some fresh air and a break from your studies. After a couple of hours sitting hunched over books, you are worried that you can even try out for the role of a hunchback. You decide to take a walk outside on the campus park. You miss warmth, the heat of the sun on your skin, needing the light for some kind of photosynthesis.  

By the time you return to the library, there sits a paper cup on top of your table with a square note beside it written, ‘Hey little fighter, soon things will be brighter!’ There is no name, no initial that gives away the identity of the alleged person who left it there. A small smiled etches on your lips as you reach for the source of warmth, the tip of your fingers have turned icy cold the second after you walked in. A string of white steam escapes through the small opening, turns into vapour around your nose, kinda dumb of you to take a sip without hesitation. The intense heat burns your upper lip and you wince in reaction. “Fuck!” 

Day 5 

Your enthusiasm surely died down. Two days away from the first paper, you are feeling the tension in your shoulders, in the air, when you come across topics that you are unsure of. The ink runs out in your flimsy pen, the cheapest in Target, and your writing fades away into almost invincible marks on the paper, until you reluctantly switch for another. Consequently, you are feeling numbness in your head after reading, with pressure in temples. Faintness and migraine give you a ready-made and honest reason to excuse yourself from the books momentarily. A short walk to the water fountain or the upper floor toilet will do. 

It seems like deja vu all over again when you come back to the same paper cup but with a different note this time, ‘Wish you luck for whatever you’re struggling with :)’ Kinda creepy… not going to lie. The idea of someone watching you has the hair on your neck prickles. However the ever encouraging words compensate for your terror. 

Fifteen minutes prior to closing time, the librarian makes an announcement and requesting patrons to leave. The sun has already set, and the moon is slowly peeking in the darkened sky. That is when you realize you have been staying in for approximately eight hours.

You make your way out immediately, the drink from an anonymous individual in your hand left untouched and disappointingly you have to throw it away. 

“Hey!” 

Your hand stops in mid air, head turns to the rippling voice. A guy in gold rimmed glasses jogs over. With a closer look, he has a strikingly handsome face and you are left wondering what exactly did you associate with a fine man like him. 

“Glad I caught you,” he says, panting slightly. His eyes flitting nervously back and forth between you and the paper cup. “Do you… Do you not like hot drinks? I’ve got you hot chocolate this time since you weren’t drinking the coffee…” 

 “Oh.” So he is the secret delivery guy. 

There is an uneasy silence in the air. He rubs his collarbone and then the back of his neck, looking almost embarrassed. “I guess you don’t.” 

“No, no! That’s not it. I just- Don’t get me wrong. I don’t wish to catch myself heart attack cause I had two shots of coffee earlier.” Well, the pounding of your heart should be stopped by now but it does not seem to. Weird. “And this… hot chocolate?” You pause for confirmation and is rewarded with a nod. “Is kinda too sweet to my liking and it’s not such a great idea to get jazzed when I’m wracking my brain.” 

He chuckles, mumbling coherently to himself that he has understood girls wrongly. Little did he know, you are no ordinary girl. You are a girl of determination; a girl of the new millennium. Sugary-sweet desserts work no effect, and you do not fawn upon pick up lines and impassioned gestures. You are too, too difficult to please.

“So…” You look everywhere except in his eyes, feeling awkward in the presence of this stranger, a hot stranger to be frank.

“I- I was asking if you wanna have… dinner with me?” Gulping so loudly he can hear himself, enough for you to hear it too, and you can see his Adam’s apple moving rapidly. 

“Sorry… I’m going back now, though…” And have yourself a bowl of bland oatmeal with fresh-cut fruits. Now, however, your stomach grumbles on cue, reminding you that you have not been eating since morning. 

He chuckles again, a pleasant throaty sound, and humiliation nips your skin like sand fleas. “Let’s go. I believe it can’t wait.” 

This is just odd. What has gotten into you to come into agreement with someone you have known for less than an hour. Anyone else will figure you are a pair of couple just by walking together shoulder to shoulder, and if anyone among your circle of friends were to find out, they are definitely going to be nosy about it.

“Hey, I may be strange, but not weird! There’s a difference.” Jaehyun is his name, and he sure has the balls of steel. Let us put it that way. That is cause the guys in your classes are incomparable, they get intimidated by you while he does not even flinch in the face of the wolf (for some reason they gave you the nickname). 

As much as you hate to admit it, the more time you spend with him, the more you enjoy his company, his wit, and his willingness to discuss anything—whether it be politics, Ironman versus Captain America, or Joji’s latest track. He is courteous, ambitious, and attractive, and he can dance with the best of them. Most of all, he does not seem to mind your independent ways of thinking. 

“Are you going now?” He is probably pushing his luck, since he certainly does not want you to leave just yet, but he has to ask. 

“I am.” You can swear you see disappointment flickers in his eyes and if you are not mistaken, his bottom lip sticking out slightly in a pout. But it is gone so fast when, “I can stay for… a bit longer.” 

“Great. Follow me.” 

Without another word, he turns and stalks up the stairs. On the third floor landing, he stops and looks back to make sure you are still following closely behind. An amused smile emerges as he watches you panting breaths, and a blush blooms like hothouse roses in your cheeks. Past the hall and into the narrow passage, thence leading to what you assume is the back door which he has already broke open with a flexible plastic ruler. Flipping the light switch, turning on the lights, illuminating the space, and you come to realize it is the abandoned classroom where you attended tutorials for Business Communication last semester. 

“We could’ve taken the elevator!” 

“It won’t be fun then.” 

“You mean, it won’t be fun if you don’t have me to laugh at.” 

“Besides, nobody saw us. We can’t be seen in here.”  

He proceeds to scramble around like he has done it before, maybe not a lot, but a few times at least. He connects his phone to the stereo system and soft, soothing music drifts lazily on the air from hidden speakers. He then joins you at the table, sitting beside you, closer than your very first meeting. 

“I didn’t know this was possible until now.” 

“Oh, they’re a lot I haven’t shown you yet,” he says, wriggling his eyebrows lasciviously and giving you a cocky grin. You just have to have a pep talk with yourself that if Jaehyun is not hinting something else—you can imagine. 

“Do you always bring people here?”

“What do you mean?”

You shrug your shoulders, turning sideways and lean against the chair back with him mirroring your posture. “You know… Girls… Is this how you impress them with your lockpicking skills?”

“Are you, perhaps, a wee bit jealous?”

You scoff at such a ridiculous prospect. In fact, you might get salty if you figure you are just one of the chicks he brought over this place. You are not going to fall for him and his antiques like the stupid bitch they are. 

“No. I never bring women here. I don’t bring anyone here. You’re a first.” 

Your interested gaze transfers to him. “You don’t?”

He shakes his head. 

“But… why?” 

“Policy.” He glances at you, sees you frowning and says, “Don’t worry about it, okay?” 

Yet for long the study session is either neglected or long been buried and forgotten, the mood of the times is a very different one. You continue to talk, and really got to know each other well, not romantically but just as good friends. Suddenly your conversation is broken with the sound of keys jingling, followed by a quick turn of the knob coming from the far side of the corridor. 

It is the security guard patrol. 

Immediately you scutter about the classroom, switching off all the lights, locking the door while he runs to unplug his phone, making sure to return the place to its original state. You find yourselves under the table and stealing glances out of the small window and the crack beneath the door until it passes. 

Though the guard has already left, it does not seem as if Jaehyun has any intention of moving an inch. He is too close—so close you can smell the musk of his cologne, and he smells so damn good. He is too close—so close you can feel the heat of him, and your backside is all but paralyzed from the uncomfortable position. It is dark, but you can still make out the twinkle in his eyes. The tall guy seems fascinated by you, looking you up and down, then openly studying your face. 

The thought must have form in both your minds at the same time because your eyes flutter shut as he leans forward, kissing you gently on the lips. A deep, lingering kiss that have you wanting more. This kiss is so soft that it’s like a memory of a kiss, so careful on your lips that it is like someone running his fingers along them. Slowly, gently, the tip of his tongue traces your mouth, outlining your lips with exquisite, excruciating care. A growl of pleasure escapes him when you part your lips in welcoming at the first prod of his tongue. The lemon drop he had before adding flavor to a kiss that is already the sweetest of your life. 

One of his hands settle at your waist, the other cups the side of your throat. His thumb slides beneath the neckline of your jacket to stroke the hollow beneath your collarbone. On a soft moan, you plunge into the mindless whirl of your senses and allow yourself to feel. Just feel. For the first time in your life, you finally understand that one kiss can helplessly seduce. And if your heart has not been racing earlier, it now goes into overdrive, hammering against your chest.

Jaehyun knows he should not be kissing you. He has told himself he cannot let it happen so soon. But something about you calls to him. Every rational thought vanishes as he gives in to the sensations rampaging out of control. He holds you close, relishing the feel of your breasts crushed against his chest. Sliding his hand down your back to where your skirt has ridden up, pushing his hand beneath the fabric, gliding it up your thigh. A firm squeeze on the curve of your flesh making you yelp and jolt. The loud collision when you banged your head against the desk above bringing you both to your senses. 

“Shit, sorry.” He is breathing hard, his eyes fierce with arousal, his lips red and moist and a little swollen from that hard kiss. You believe yours appear just the same as well. 

Deep in the foggy recesses of your mind, Jaehyun has crawled from under the table and turned away with downcast eyes as he seemingly adjusting the sudden tightness in his pants. 

What just happened? 

“Are you coming out, or not?” He offers his hand, you blink before sliding your shaking one around his. 

Talk about awkward. His shirt is a wrinkled mass from your gripping fingers, your hair swept to the side still you can feel his delicate touch on your skin, both your faces flushed a luscious crimson from the passionate moment.

“I- I should get going…” You nervously clear your throat. Actually, you are ashamed of yourself about it all. You have never thought of yourself as needy, thereto committing to the blind decision of having a hookup with an incredibly gorgeous man. God must have sent a guardian angel to knock out your head before it takes on another level.

However all these thoughts are gone when he says, “May I see you again?” 

“… Sure.”

“Tomorrow?” Boy, he sure is eager.

“Patience.” 

“Right, that’s why I said tomorrow. I want to see you again in another hour. But I’m willing to wait.” 

Has he always been this sweet and smooth? His words, eye contact, and all body gestures operate in the fashion of sweet talking and alluring you, to really basically falling for his suave, smooth ways. This has never been you. 

Unfortunately, the following days should not be possible because you have to keep your mind active and your sanity intact. 

“After finals?” 

He lets out a deep guttural groan. On a second thought, he wants to take back his words, he is not willing to wait for a week, let alone a day. He wants to greet you with a kiss on the back of your hand and a bouquet of fresh flowers, he wants to take you out for a proper date at an exclusive cafe, he wants to pay for the meals— The list goes on. 

“Right. After finals.”

[kabutoraiger]

usually i type up “final thoughts” posts like, immediately after i finish a show. usually i’ve already made up my mind about how i feel, i guess. but kr build is... a tough one to wrap my head around.

i went into build needing it to be really good. for me personally, rider hasn’t been truly great since fourze. i’ve definitely liked certain seasons in between. but i haven’t loved them. and so this was me kinda placing all my hopes on this 1 show to tell me that rider still had the potential to be incredible.

and... it was, in some ways. mainly in terms of character - it’s been a while since i’ve loved a main rider OR a secondary as much as i love our best match boys. their relationship is something i hadn’t realized how much we’d been missing in this franchise. we hadn’t had that powerful main/secondary romance fated connection since... decade, i guess, and nothing quite like ryuga & sento since kagami & tendou. even then, there’s only so far i can take that comparison. bc ryusen really is pretty incomparable to the rest of heisei rider relationships. build has a lot of showa leanings but it’s the main duo that reminds me the most of the olden days.

i mean tell me this isn’t some build lads dialogue right here:

and the rest of the cast has so many other standouts - sawa, who despite being severely underutilized is still wildly interesting and unlike any lady in rider in the past few years. gentoku and his several weird phases each of them iconic in their own way. evolt, who entertained me more than any central villain in rider ever has. (thank you papa dan the capitalist man for paving the road for more genuinely fun big bads. your contribution was invaluable)

soichi. though why i love him so much i’ll get into in a moment.

the way the relationships & connections are woven together in build is astonishing to me. the way misora’s childhood interests informed the fullbottles (ok, sure, a lot of That was half-assed as far as explanations go, but on the base level there are some affecting ideas in there). the way the best match ft. her favorite animal then named sento. the way sento & ryuga were seemingly destined to meet from early on. the way sento was built by evolt, and the way that was all slowly erased as he was rebuilt by people who loved him. the way evolt’s manipulation of his “proteges” so to speak mirrors nanba and his “children.” all these themes of being put on a preset path by some dark or terrible power or person, and having to fight to free yourself from it.

there are so many beautifully complex things going on in build. the ties into real world politics. the way the pandora box doesn’t turn people berserker violent but instead makes them lose their human empathy, makes them scheming and cruel. gives them imperialist notions of the ultimate satisfaction being war and conquest. the blatant “here, see for yourself, kids” about why wars happen - not for the greater good but because people in power want them to - and how innocent people will always get caught in the crossfire and be turned into little more than weapons to be disposed of at someone’s whim.

there is so much happening in build.

there is too much happening in build.

in the end, it throws so much at the screen that it was never all going to stick. you could make entire shows out of minor parts of kr build. the nanba children, ryuga’s origins, vernage and the dead civilization of fcking mars!! these could all be entire premises on their own. in build, these things are almost an afterthought. it’s dizzying, at best. frustrating, at worst. even moreso when you consider that clearly mr muto needed to burn time somehow before the endgame, which is the only explanation i can come up with for the collecting lost bottles nonsense and all that ungodly boring shit with sento’s dad.

how do you look at this show you’ve made, which has about 50 incredibly interesting ideas too many, and decide to ignore all of those in favor of dad drama, toku’s favorite dull as dirt oft-recycled plot concept? it’s mind boggling to me. and to think that time could’ve been spent deepening characters & relationships, too. letting sawa talk to utsumi. doing Anything with utsumi to establish some kind of consistent personality, to make us actually care when he’s revealed to have technically died in the human sense and had his free will stripped from him many episodes prior. letting misora & kazumi have a normal goddamn conversation for once. treating misora as a person with wants of her own and not just a cute little prop to stand around and cry over others.

letting soichi wake the fuck up!!

the intriguing tragedy of soichi is something that i kept hoping and wishing that build might address. being trapped inside your own body for a decade, watching someone pose as you, and with such a spot-on impression that no one notices at all. the helplessness, knowing that this entity is plotting something terrible for everyone on earth and just. not being able to do a thing about it. but the emotions most of all - what did he feel for sento & ryuga & sawa while he was trapped? was it real, if he had no say in it, if he could hear them but they couldn’t hear him? and what did he really feel towards evolt, his only actual 2-sided conversation partner for 10 whole years? how well did he know him? what wild knowledge of evolt’s weaknesses could he have imparted if he’d just WOKEN UP!!

and now, with the ending, it’s like it never happened at all. i suppose the idea going around is that someday they might remember. but that’s just... so nebulous. it’s not a merge of worlds if one is just gone. i’d hoped so much that certain outcomes might have carried over, just with different causes. gentoku’s father still being dead, for example. in the new world he wouldn’t have been killed by evolt but instead in, say, a political assassination.

it just all feels too simple. all that pain and strife just wiped away. maybe it’s hypocritical to complain about this as a ryuki fan, but. in ryuki, resets were established as a thing that could happen. and via the setup of the rider battle, what other option was there to end the series satisfactorily?

here in build, we were told that the worlds would combine, and that evolt would never have existed. but evolt was not the singular source of villainy in all the universe. this show which took so many thought-provoking risks early on is now apparently telling me that in a world without evolt, humanity is totally at peace. nanba was never affected by the pandora box’s light. he was just goddamn evil, because sometimes people are. i loved that about his portrayal. in a world with no war to profit off of, this man should by all accounts probably be trying to start one himself.

but that’s not the world we see in the final ep of build. instead, everyone is simply normal and happy, the terrible things that shaped them in another reality seemingly having never occurred at all, even the things (re: nanba children) that by all accounts still should have.

it’s a disappointment. it feels like the easy way out.

but at the same time holy shit that ryuga & sento romance ending and the idea of the others even just potentially getting their memories back is like my IDEAL tropey shit i am so into that stuff oh my god dude!!! i cried so fucking hard just thinking about it!!

... so. yeah. conflicted might be the word for all of this.

i wish build had been better. i’m not sure what exactly happened, in that 2nd half. rewrites, i guess? the command that it now had to be compliant with the setting of the next rider, and so whoops time to do a little reality smushing & for some reason throw out all the other plot points? demands to toss in even more fucking merch like it didn’t have enough collectibles and upgrades already, good lord, even kids can’t possibly keep up with toy schedules like this, can they, like by the time you convince your parents to buy you [x] it’s already goddamn obsolete in the show --

but it’s hard to deny that build affected me in a big way. i got tired of it, near the end. but i’m glad i watched it all the way through. and i’ll never forget the absolute euphoria i felt watching, like, ep 12 to ep 30 or so. that stretch was a highlight of this entire franchise for me. it was like i was watching something made specifically for me. it was beautiful.

beautiful just like the suits in this show. damn. 

if only sawa had gotten one.

[boner-taunt]

Year end games ranking 2017

Gonna do a top 5 of games that were new to me this year (not games that necessarily came out this year, just games I played for the first time this year).

5. Final Fantasy XIII

Might be controversial, eyes probably rolling out of heads right now, don’t care. Picked it up on Steam sale with extremely low expectations since people On The Internet™ told me it was the worst thing ever but I actually had a lot of fun. Story is not super strong but the combat is more engaging and exciting than I ever expected. The overall presentation is pretty nice and the environments are varied and pleasant to look at. I expected there to be more revelations regarding Pulse and the humans’ relationship with the fal’Cie but I didn’t lose interest in the story and saw it through to the end. Perhaps there’s more info in the sequels, maybe I’ll check them out eventually. Anyway, was pleasantly surprised by what I expected to be an ironic playthrough so I could properly make fun of it later.

4. Valkyria Chronicles

I had a false start playing the WWII animu tactics game like, 2 years ago I think? I couldn’t get my PS2 controller working with it properly on Steam and didn’t really give it a chance past the first map. Finally got a USB 360 controller for my birthday last year and really got into this game. The visuals are very nice, the gameplay is legit good and engaging and is a really interesting take on the tactics genre. A few maps in and I was hooked, it also helped that a friend picked it up soon after and we kinda had a dual playthrough going on which was pretty fun! A couple of the maps took the most planning I’ve ever done in a tactics game to get through favorably (fuck you Batomys). The voice acting is great and I really had a lot of fun with this one.

3. Life Is Strange

I’m not normally one for these types of decision-driven story games but Life Is Strange really stole my heart within just the first episode or two. I guess I’m not sure anymore what my expectations were going in but I can tell you I wasn’t prepared for what I found. The characters and their interactions, for the most part, are very well done and relatable. I was genuinely emotionally invested in Max and her friends by the conclusion of the series and can’t wait to see where the second season takes the series, even if it doesn’t directly follow Max again. Soundtrack is superb and the locations are extremely good at capturing a small-town America vibe that the game has going on. I really can’t recommend this game enough, it has to be experienced to fully understand.

2. NieR: Automata

I haven’t been this engaged in a story and setting so fast in quite a while. There are certainly weak points if you dissect this game but the entire experience, taken as a whole? Totally incomparable. The feel and themes throughout are extremely unique but so cohesive: from music (which is probably definitely my Soundtrack Of The Year pick) to scenery, character design to combat. You really get the impression that everything shown to you is deliberate and with purpose, there really isn’t much wasted effort here. The “multiple endings / playthroughs” tag is misleading, you realize as you play that they ARE the narrative, it isn’t just rewards you get for repeating the game or something. You play the first story from one viewpoint, again from another, totally different viewpoint, and then an entirely different story continues after the first scenario complete with its own prologue and title screen. This game really made me think a lot about its themes and seek out additional materials about the game universe immediately after finishing up. Can’t recommend this enough.

1. Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild

I missed the hype train surrounding this game’s development because I figured “i’m probably not getting a Switch any time soon so who cares” but then my roommate @smash-64 picked up a copy for WiiU (which I didn’t know existed) earlier this year. I watched him play for a bit and got hooked even before I laid hands on it myself. I hadn’t been so excited about getting home to play a game after work since, like, Smash 4. I’m probably not going to be able to add any great takes here that haven’t been said about this game a hundred times already but it really is a superbly put together experience. I love exploration in games so it was very easy for me to get lost just taking in everything the land of Hyrule has to offer. I think the best description I saw for this game was that it’s the best adventure simulator on the market right now. If you think something you want to try is going to work in the game, it probably can and will. Everything plays very naturally and environments are so beautiful. @pt2010 I hope you finally got to pick this up because it’s amazing and it’s going to make it very hard to play a traditional 3D Zelda again I think.

[yourfuckingmajesty]

I’m going to do this in a post instead of a video because I don’t like my voice. 

Fiancee tag: @finecallmejane

1. Describe how you met each other.

Well, writing is a thing we both love to do. We both had blogs where we did the writing thing, and we both knew the incomparable @rawwrchie and had written with her. One day, with a newer blog, I followed Care’s blog, we started talking via tags and then via skype on and off. Rach suggested a threeway skype call and we all got closer and had a blast and bing bang boom, here we are.

2. What did you first notice about each other?

I think I first noticed how kind she is. She’s always talking to new people and being so nice to them and asking them about themselves and genuinely caring about the answers. The people around her know how lovely she is and while she has gotten hurt for her kindness, it hasn’t stopped her.

3. Who first asked the other out?

Well.........we kinda started dating before we started dating. Before we admitted our romantic feelings for one another, we were “platonic girlfriends” and I honestly don’t remember who was like “hey this isn’t platonic.” 

4. Where was your first date?

On skype? But our first in-person date was at Circa 22 in Wilmington. We went back there this year too to celebrate our engagement.

5. Who was first to verbally say “I love you”?

Pffff probably Care. 

6. How did your first kiss happen? Who initiated it?

Iirc, it was Care? Oh man my memory stinks. I think she asked for a kiss while we were in Wilmington. 

7. When is your anniversary? 

August 5, 2013.

8. How long have you been together?

Four years and almost two months.

9. What made you realize you were in love with her?

It was never one moment. It was a lot of little moments where she was just unabashedly herself. When she talks about fall, when she embraces the silly things that she loves, when she gets excited about a book she’s reading, when she’s trying to scold our cat and stinks at it. It’s just a collection of things that make a voice go in the back of my head, “Gosh I love her.”

10. Where you friends before you became lovers?

Yup. We were friends while we were really dating, frankly. We chose the date for our anniversary after the fact, because we didn’t have a set date where we started dating. And our friendship is the biggest part of our relationship. We’re best friends first and foremost, fiancees second.

11. Were either of you out before getting with your girlfriend?

I was out, but given that she lived in NC, not so much. Her husband knew (we’re polyam, worry not, he knew), but he didn’t.... know know, you know? Like, he knew in a hypothetical sense. I’d been out since middle school, though.

12. Have either of you dated a girl before getting with your girlfriend or is she your first?

I’d dated several women before, but I was kinda her first (and then....turned out not to be a woman lol)

13. When is your girlfriend’s birthday? Who is older?

September 22nd. Tomorrow! And she’s older by a little under five years.

14. Do you live together?

Give it a few weeks and we will be.

15. Have you met your girlfriend’s parents? If so, what was that like?

I have, twice. She hasn’t met mine yet. I love her mom. She made me cry, but in a good way. Her dad’s nice when he’s on his best behavior. 

16. How many people are in your girlfriend’s family?

Immediate family, three and a half? Mom, Dad, Pants, Pants’ fiancee. 

17. Whose family do you hang out with more?

Well, she hasn’t met mine, so technically hers, but we’ll be across the country from hers in a few weeks, so then it’ll be mine. But we’re gonna call hers all the time!

18. What is a typical date night like for you and your girlfriend?

Netflix and chill. Except chill actually means snuggling and someone falling asleep. #asexualthings

19. How do you usually spend your time together?

Snuggling, watching things together, reading.

20. Have you ever been mistaken for sisters?

Given how far I tower over her and how strikingly different our hair and facial features are? I very highly doubt that (though probably when walking hand-in-hand in Wilmington someone thought it just to avoid the queer thing)

21. Have you ever shared your clothes?

Actually yes! I stole her shorts and she’s worn my shirt.

22. Have you ever experienced any discrimination or prejudice becasue you are a same sex couple?

Not yet, luckily. We surround ourselves with caring friends, and our families are totally cool with it. My mom would certainly rather I hadn’t been guided down a difficult path, but that’s more her anger at society than any real concern towards me. I think most parents want the path of least resistance for their child for many reasons, but she knows how incredibly happy Care (and Sport and Emil) make(s) me, so she’d never choose anything else for me.

23. Does anyone you know disapprove of your relationship?

A friend’s parents would, but no one that actually knows about it. 

24. How much PDA do you do?

A decent amount. We love to hold hands and when sitting together will often snuggle up together, but we don’t kiss a whole lot in public or anything. 

25. Have you ever been on your periods together?

Sometimes! But that’s rare since both of us can be finnicky. 

26. What is your girlfriend’s number labeled as in your cell phone?

The Wife  ♥

28. Do you have any pet names for each other?

She calls me her bee and I use all numbers of pet names: honey, dear, babe, etc. I’ve gotten much better at using pet names during our relationship~

29. Does your girlfriend have any pets?

Well, we share our pets, but hers is Aspen Copper (ginger kitty with a zombie patch)

30. Who is more likely to cook a meal?

Probably me. I love to cook and while she’ll do it, if given the opportunity she’ll usually just eat sandwiches.

31. What is your girlfriend’s favorite food? Least favorite food?

Applesauce probably. And um. Probably anything that gives her heartburn.

32. Who is more likely to cry for no reason?

Care. Though usually that reason is “THAT CAT LOOKS SO HAPPY” 

33. Can your girlfriend play any musical instruments?

I don’t think so? 

34. Who is your girlfriend’s favorite musical artist?

Florence and the Machine.

35. What is your girlfriend’s current favorite song?

She doesn’t really have one? Just a bunch of playlists. (#same)

36. Do you have a couple song?

Kinda sorta? I wanna walk down the aisle to Ruelle’s I Get To Love You

37. Do you have a couple name?

Kat & Care, mostly. If you combined our names it’d sound the same. Kare or Cat.

38. Who is more likely to forget where they put things?

Care.

39. Which side of the bed do you each sleep on?

I sleep on the right facing the bed, Care sleeps on the left.

40. Who hogs the sheets more when sleeping together?

CARE

41. What do you argue/fight about the most?

Someone not taking care of themselves.

42. How do you usually get over a argument/fight?

I don’t say a thing that’s bothering me and then Care asks a few times and then blurting happens.

43. Who is more likely to refuse sex?

#asexual so yeah we don’t really do that

44. What nationality is your girlfriend?

If you hear her talk, she’s Scottish. Otherwise, American.

45. Does your girlfriend play any sports?

She tries to play soccer with the corners of things but just ends up getting bruises.

46. Does your girlfriend root for any sports teams?

Not really, but she’ll be a lowkey Broncos gal soon enough ;)

47. Does your girlfriend have any quirky habits?

Do you HAVE like ten hours to listen?

48. Who takes longer getting ready to go somewhere?

Me, probably, since I wear makeup.

49. Who is more likely to remember an important day (i.e. birthday, anniversary, etc.)?

Both of us, but she’ll remember faster.

50. What is your girlfriend’s eye color?

Brown with pretty speckles.

51. What is your girlfriend’s shoe size?

Child.

52. What is your girlfriend’s dress size?

Perfect.

53. What is your girlfriend’s favorite TV show?

Currently Wynonna Earp probs.

54. What is your girlfriend’s favorite movie?

Uhhhhh. (Care says: “I probably have one but can’t remember?”)

55. What is one item on your girlfriend’s bucket list?

Visit all her friends around the world.

56. Is your girlfriend more likely to save or spend money?

Save, unless there are books.

57. Who squashes the bugs?

Me.

58. Who is your girlfriend’s #1 celebrity crush?

Hozier probs.

59. What is your girlfriend’s favorite color?

Autumn just......all of autumn colors.

60. What is your girlfriend’s middle name?

Marie.

61. Who is more likely to randomly burst out into a song?

Care, but I’ll quickly join in.

62. Who is more likely to randomly start dancing?

Probably me, but that’s just because I stim constantly.

63. Who usually pays when you go out to eat?

It’s been about 50/50 so far.

64. Have you ever taken a vacation together? If so, where to?

Yup. Our first date was technically a vacation together. We went to Wilmington and stayed in a B&B together. The second one was there too, and we stayed in someone’s house.

65. How tall is your girlfriend?

The smolest. 4′11 -ish

66. Is your girlfriend religious at all?

Kinda sorta? Like, she’s agnostic-christian-leaning?

67. Who is more likely to spontaneously be romantic?

Care

68. Whose laugh is cuter?

Absolutely Care’s~

69. Who is the better driver?

Me, but come back to me in a few years when she actually has a license.

70. Who is the better singer?

Me maybe? I dunno. I like listening to her sing along with the radio, but I was in choir?

71. Who is the better dancer?

We’re both white and you can tell. ‘Nuff said.

72. Who is better at math?

We’re both pretty awful at it tbh.

73. Whose handwriting is better?

Hers, hands-down.

74. Who is more likely to sign a card or a note from the both of you?

I’ll get back to you in December when we sign stuff for gifts.

75. Have you ever discussed marriage?

Shit, I’d hope so since we’re getting married next fall.

76. Have you ever discussed having children?

Many many many many times. We’re not sure on numbers yet, but yes, we’re going to start trying after we get married.

77. What is one thing your girlfriend does that you don’t like?

PUTS OTHER PEOPLE BEFORE HERSELF. 

Also all those SANDWICHES. 

78. Is there anything about your girlfriend you think most people don’t know?

She can be hella vindictive. She seems super sweet and kind and lovely - and she IS - but sometimes, she just gets crossed too far and gets really angry.

79. Choose one word to describe your girlfriend. Why that word?

Kind. She goes out of her way to be really sweet to just about everyone - even if she doesn’t really like a person. And she always thinks of others.

80. Pass on one piece of relationship advice.

Communication, communication, communication. Those fights we mentioned? Yeah, they’re always caused by a lack of communication. Every. Single. Time. Please, for all that is holy and good, communicate with your partner if there’s something wrong or if something you’re gonna do is going to affect them in any way. 

[mythologicalidiots]

@backstagebaae

Dear Tino,

I... guess it’s kinda lame to be writing a letter or whatever. Like wow Hiko why don’t you just communicate with your boyfriend? Well, this is easier for me I guess. And there are some things I want to say that I know I wouldn’t be able to get out right if I said them aloud. So.. yeah sorry you’re gonna have to deal with a letter. At least that means you’ll have something to hold onto forever?  Anyway, I’ll get to it. I guess I just want to thank you and stuff. I don’t think I’ll ever really be able to thank you enough for everything you’ve done for me. I don’t know if I’ll even be able to get the extent of it across through this letter alone. But hey I gotta try I guess. Before I met you I was... in a bad place I guess. I had (and probably still have) a lot of issues. I couldn’t bare the thought of letting anyone get close to me. I was convinced that I was fine with having one friend and my dad. I didn’t need anyone else, romantic or otherwise. I had myself convinced of that for.. god knows how many years. Probably since I was like ten. I know you know about some of the stuff that happened when I was younger, I haven’t really gone into detail though... point is it wasn’t fun. By about ten I’d pretty much given up on ever making friends. In my closed off little world everyone was just horrible. Bullies, people that just watched and did nothing, people who lied and betrayed you. It only got worse as I got older. Then I added people who saw me as this... sexual object I guess. (And before you feel guilty shut up I’m not talking about you, past Tino doesn’t count.) I shut people out even more, wondering what exactly was going through their minds when they looked at me or talked to me. Everyone just always seemed to want something, everyone had some ulterior motive. So I trusted no one. Now that I have you, I can admit that was no way to live. I wasn’t happy or content as much as I forced myself to believe I was. I was lonely, and I didn’t want to even tell anyone about it, not even the only two people I did trust.  When I first met you, I thought you were like everyone else. I thought you were looking at me how they were all looking at me. And yeah okay maybe you were a little at first. But for god knows whatever reason, no matter how much I pushed you away and turned down your advances, you kept at it. And somewhere somehow along the line we become unlikely friends I guess. I started looking forward to the next time I’d run into you. The next time you’d make a pass at me and I’d hit you. Just so we could be together, and just have fun. I know I.. didn’t really show it, but I enjoyed every second I was with you.  I realize now I liked you long before you even confessed to me. You were the one person to break down my defenses.  The feelings I had for you terrified me. I’d never felt that way before. I didn’t want to feel like that. I didn’t want to trust someone. Because everyone was a bully, or they just watched on, or they wanted something from me. But eventually I came to realize I was wrong, and that you were the exception. You weren’t like everyone else, you were different. You saw me for who I was, my many many flaws, and whatever good points you could manage to find among them, and you accepted it all. More than that you liked it all, you wanted it all.  It was hard to wrap my head around, hell it still is.  I put you through hell and back, and I’ll never fully forgive myself for that. Not only because of how I made you feel, but also because I almost lost you. Because of my insecurities I almost lost the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me. I don’t know how much longer I could have gone on like that, before I met you, you changed everything for me. You showed me a new world. You opened my eyes and made me realize that not everyone has to be so bad. When I say you showed me a new world I mean it, or at least, the way I see the world is different now. It doesn’t feel like such a dark and bad place anymore You’ve change me I think, for the better I mean. I still think I have a long way to go. I know you don’t like me saying it, and say I’m fine as I am, but I want to be perfect for you, or at least close to it. And if not for you, then for myself. I want to keep getting better. I want to be the type of person who you can be proud to say is your boyfriend (I know I know “you already are Hiko, I am proud etc). Maybe it’s more so... I want to be proud of myself and actually feel like I suit you.  Because to me you’re... I guess amazing is the only word I can think of that fits it. You just shine so bright you know? I guess that sounds kinda lame. But its true. You’re dazzling. And I don’t mean your looks. Though... yeah those are definitely good too. I mean you. You just smile and exude this... energy I guess. You’re brave and strong and confident. When you want something you go for it, you’re not afraid of what might happen, or if you are you ignore it. You take the risk. You’re genuine and kind. The type of person that’s hard to hate (although I did try my best in the beginning). That’s more what I mean when I say you’re dazzling and you shine. I can’t think of a single thing I don’t admire about you. I might disagree with some things you do or say, but even then it’s like.. I still kinda admire you ?? in some weird way I can’t explain.  Point is, you’re just this amazing person, and both for you and myself, I want to become someone who should be standing by your side.  I mean, the fact that you somehow wriggled your way into my heart means you have to be pretty amazing. I was so shut off before you, it’s pretty much a miracle that you did. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I don’t think I’ve ever really properly liked anyone, but even so this just feels incomparable to everything before. I care about you so much. More than I can even begin to explain. You mean everything to me Martino Kiritani. You are my everything. I truly hope that I do and can forever make you happy, all I want is for you to be happy.  So, happy birthday my lovable significant annoyance. I hope you enjoy it, I’ll try my best. 

Hiko.