#because this might be a multi-chapter opus

[codename-adler]

"nothing is going to be okay" sounds like it's gonna hurt... tell me more.

It's meant to hurt. You and me both.

Adler's PiPs ~ Project: Nothing Is Going to Be Okay

Also known as Adler-toys-with-the-Major-Character-Death-tag. This is an exploration of every universe where Kevin, Andrew and/or Neil do not make it out. Sometimes Kevin dies; sometimes it's Andrew; other times it's Neil. Someone always dies. Doesn't matter if it's Kandreil, Andreil, Kandrew, Kevneil. Sometimes it's because of canon going slightly to the left. Sometimes it's because it's a totally different universe. Every variation is always merciless.

The origins of such a fun project? Music. It all stems from my personal playlist of the saddest soundtracks or instrumental pieces i religiously listen to, which i won't share until i finally get to writing this collection of grief. So far i have 96 pieces on that playlist. Will i write the boys dying 96 times? i doubt it, but each piece represents a universe with a specific scene and vision. sometimes if it's a soundtrack, i put the boys in that universe and kill 'em. sometimes it's the title of the piece that awakes something ugly in me. sometimes it's a combination of words and vibes. the possibilities are endless. the grief is infinite, a loop, inescapable. yes i got mental problems. yes i got meds for it. why do u ask.

Why the fun title? Ask Andrew.

"Your parents are dead, you are not fine, and nothing is going to be okay. This is not news to you. But from now until May you are still Neil Josten and I am still the man who said he would keep you alive. I don't care if you use this phone tomorrow. I don't care if you never use it again. But you are going to keep it on you because one day you might need it. On that day you're not going to run. You're going to think about what I promised you and you're going to make the call. Tell me you understand." (TRK)

Now! Some of the wips in the collection:

So This Is Christmas: based on Happy Xmas (War Is Over) by Gabrielle Aplin, i revisit Neil's days at the Nest and add a few more casualties. the boys take their turn kicking the bucket. this one is multi-chaptered.

fun fact: there are only 3 songs in the playlist that have lyrics: one of them is in an Arabic or Persian language that i do not speak/read, the other two are in English (Happy Xmas + my tears ricochet)

i would also like to note that Gabrielle Aplin's Happy Xmas is part of my aftg soundtrack project where i'm trying to imagine the series as a TV show and assemble music for specific scenes in multi-episodes seasons. this one i imagine playing with slow-motion scenes cutting back-and-forth between Neil's torture in the Nest over the holidays and the Foxes celebrating in NYC. my magnum opus if you will. i'm not even kidding. all my self-confidence is in that divine mission.

Andrew's Farewell: Hunger Games AU. a classic. the song? iykyk. the victim? iykyk.

On the Nature of Day(light): based on the piece by Max Richter (all variations and covers, but i do favor the original and the entropy). canon divergence AU where Kevin also intervenes at the end of TKM, when the Foxes win the Championships and there's the Riko-Neil-Andew showdown. establishing then destroying Kandreil.

Tennessee: based on the Hans Zimmer soundtrack for the film Pearl Harbor. i took inspiration from the title and the music, not the movie. totally war-unrelated. excerpt (Andreil, other Baltimore AU):

"We could go... We could go... to Tennessee..." "There's nothing in Tennessee, Abram." "Exactly..." *shaky pained smile*

Thin Orange Line: based on Journey to the Line by Hans Zimmer & Gavin Greenaway, from the film The Thin Red Line. War AU + Kandrew + Soldier Kevin Day carrying injured/unconscious Soldier Andrew Minyard to safety. only one makes it.

Other inspirations come from the soundtracks of The Last of Us (1 + 2 + HBO show), The Haunting of Bly Manor / Hill House, Max Richter, Hannibal (NBC show), House of the Dragon, Dune (Denis Villeneuve/Hans Zimmer), and many other shows, films, video games and original compositions / composers.

this project is my beloved baby. i remember it being the first push to create since a long while. i know it is very very sad, and that MCD is very rarely liked/read. i'm still invested. maybe i'll try out NaNoWriMo for a 3rd time with this project. i'm not giving up!

thank you anon, from the bottom of my heart, for giving me the opportunity to info-dump and for allowing me to see that i actually have much more figured out than i thought. i'm glad the hurt/no comfort vibe bewitched you.

[operationslipperypuppet]

all prime numebrs for the fic writer ask! 💛😊

I will pretend you spelled numbers correctly lol. thanks for the ask!!

2. How many fics did you work on this year? (They don’t have to be finished or published!)

I want to say 12. I published 6, I’m currently working on 2 different ideas for the naddpod gift exchange so I’ve started both and will be making a full decision tonight or tomorrow (lmao), and then there are a couple I just decided to not publish and a couple I’m always working on but will never actually commit to finishing because I can’t come up with a satisfying ending.

3. What’s something you learned about yourself as a writer?

That I can allow myself to do the things I want to do and go back and fix the other stuff later. I had previously only done this with a fic that included a bunch of time skips and that was why I wormed around the document but I did this with one fic that I consider my magnum opus and it worked. (I like to write dialogue more than scene descriptors so I wrote all the dialogue back and forth and then went back and added names and descriptors and everything else and it was so much more fun)

5. What fandom(s) did you write for this year?

Naddpod. It was just naddpod. I’m thinking I might break into d20 next year but I make no promises, naddpod is so fun to write for.

7. What character(s) captured your heart?

Hardwon Surefoot. Moonshine Cybin. For some reason I find them easiest to write even though getting Moonshine’s voice right was incredibly daunting every time I wrote her. There’s just so much to play with and it was very fun. Plus the Hardwon being alive reveal rewired my brain.

11. What fic was the most satisfying to finish writing?

how to think about you (without it ripping my heart out). God that was a doozy to write. It was my first foray into doing something multi-chaptered and I did have it finished before I even began publishing it but doing the daily updates and my every chapter mini edits took so much time that it was so much fun to finish. Plus I thought about the idea for truly so long before I started writing it that it was very relieving to finally finish.

13. What fic was the easiest to write?

Fools Rush In (Idiots, However, Take 200 Years). This is the fic I mentioned for number 3. I wrote all the dialogue in basically one pass because it’s a long, drawn out conversation that lasts an entire day. I immensely love writing dialogue and the back and forth, hitting what Hardwon and Moonshine would say and how they’d react was easy. And then, even though I was dreading the descriptors, they came so easily because I could picture them so perfectly. It does feel weird to say that my longest fic to date was the easiest to write but it was.

17. What are your go-to writing snacks?

Doing that classic ADHD thing where you hyperfocus and forget to eat all day and then start shaking and put fistfuls of m&ms in your mouth while waiting for chicken to heat up. But when I remember to snack, Smartfood popcorn.

19. Share your favorite opening line.

“You love me?” (Fools Rush In (Idiots, However, Take 200 Years).) I knew I’d open this with that before I finished the previous work in the series. I enjoy getting straight to the point.

23. Share the final version of a sentence or paragraph you struggled with. What about it was challenging? Are you happy with how it turned out?

This was a hard goddamn choice but here goes:

“Look - “ She paused, took a deep breath, and started again. “Can I make a suggestion? You two know him better than I do, obviously, but this might be a time where you give him some space. I know that’s not really what you three do, but he’s going through one of the worst days of his life. And you are, too, but he’s incredibly in his head about it right now. I think maybe if you give him a moment to work out his own feelings, he’ll be able to articulate them to you. And you will then be able to assure him that you need him. Besides, your MeeMaw will take great care of him, Moonshine.” (The Void of an Absence)

Alanis is speaking here. And I wanted her to be pragmatic without seeming insensitive while also staying relatively true to the character she is in the show. I ended up with this slightly more emotionally aware Alanis than we’ve seen but she does switch straight to business afterwards, and that is kind of how Murph RP’d the scene with her and Hardwon. But I overthought it a lot. I’m pretty okay with its final version, but mostly because I got to sneak a “tell me your feelings and I’ll tell you that I need you” reference in there.

29. If this were an awards show, who would you thank?

Obviously the two crew for creating characters that so thoroughly destroy and entertain me, and the people who got excited when I said shit like “I have a terrible idea that’s going to hurt” and responded with “do it.”

Fic writer asks list - ask

[i-was-bored-so-this-happened]

Rae Writes!

Indeed she does! She writes on Tumblr, she writes on AO3, she takes requests on occasion! And here she'll link you to all of the fics she's done, with accompanying hashtags and playlists where applicable!

This will be updated as time goes on, but for now I'll be starting with my bigger fics <3

Banner by @late2000shistoricalreenactment i love youuuu

Fandoms

Primeval

The Mandalorian [Star Wars]

His Dark Materials

Baldur's Gate 3

Key

👤Original Character Fic

📄One Shot

📑One Shot Compilation

📚 Multi-Chapter

🪐Alternate Universe

🔀Crossover

Primeval

Alexandra's Evolution 👤📚

Alex Hart just wants to pass her exams. That's all she wants. To pass her exams and [eventually] get her doctorate. And she should have some advantage in that, given that her uncle is her professor’s partner. But then Connor Temple turns up with a suspicious newspaper and convinces Nick Cutter and Stephen Hart to follow him to the Forest of Dean, where a government official called Oliver Leek is waiting for them. Him, a dinosaur, and a portal to the past.

- Tumblr Links (1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12-?) - AO3 Link - #alex hart - General Playlist - Linear Playlist

The Anomaly Detection Device 📑

Collection of short works written with the help of a random generator I made!

- AO3 Link - Random Generator Link

His Dark Materials

Sanchez & Scoresby 👤📚

A hot-air balloon is on its way North, to Trollesund. Far below them, on the sea, a Gyptian boat sails in the same direction. On the boat is a girl who will change the world and in the sky are two adults who will guide her to her destiny. Their paths haven’t crossed yet, but they soon will, and once they have they’ll never diverge.

- Tumblr Links (1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12-13-?) - AO3 Link - #kit sanchez - Playlist

Opus Number One 📄

Just. Soft, chill times with Will and Lyra. Also me being a music nerd and a big fan of Will knowing how to play the piano

- AO3 Link

The Mandalorian

Second Star 👤📚

The Mandalorian finds himself in need of help. Shortly after finding the Child, he realises he isn't exactly cut out for care-taking, but he needs to keep the Child alive until he can deliver him. Luckily for him, he's found an ally in Kuiil the Ugnaught, who knows someone that might be able to help.

- Tumblr Links (1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12-13-14-15-?) - AO3 Link - #okan the unknown - Playlist

Baldur's Gate 3

Greensleeves 👤📚

Xaph has come crashing to earth with a mind flayer tadpole embedded in her skull. She must find allies, forge friendships and brave the wilds to find a cure for the parasite, a journey which will prove even more perilous than initially expected

- Tumblr Links (1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12-13-14-15-16-17-18-19-20-21-?) - AO3 Link - #xaph [tav] - Playlist

The Yawning Grave 👤📄

On the sixth anniversary of the defeat of the Absolute, the party - minus one - gathers in Baldur's Gate to celebrate. Xaph [Tav] introduces her firstborn child to Karlach

- AO3 Link

Necromancin' Dancin' 👤📄

Dana can't sleep, and finds Wyll dancing by the campfire. He invites her to join him and inadvertently sparks memories of Dana's love-life pre-tadpole

- AO3 Link

It Will Come Back 👤📚

Gortash has a safehouse in the Outer City where he conducted most of his business before he began to slide up the scale of Baldurian aristocracy. A window on the second floor can no longer be locked because acid had melted the latch away to nothing years ago. He refuses to fix it. It's how Dana likes to let herself in

- Tumblr Links (1-2-3-4-5) - AO3 Link - #dana [durge] - Playlist

[youngpettyqueen]

🗣️❌?

🗣️ "Talk about your favourite WIP"

"rumour has it" cause its just a ridiculous silly concept. I typically focus on writing a lot of emotional stuff that leans more into angst, so this one is fun cause its just silly! its fun! there are no stakes to it its just Hawkeye being a pain in the ass while BJ takes things way too seriously. there's no heartbreaking reveal to be had, no angsty twist, its just MASH shenanigans

I like to think of this fic as like. the B plot to an episode thats got horrors going on elsewhere. like in the background of all this nonsense you've probably got something traumatizing going on but its nowhere to be seen here. this is the bridge subplot of The Best of Enemies. this is BJ and his motorcycle in Blood and Guts. this is my magnum opus and I cant wait to share it because its soooo funny for me

also its fun dialogue practice because MASH jokes and one liners are ELITE

❌ "What WIP do you find the most challenging? Why?"

the last chapter of "and miles to go before i sleep" is being such a royal pain in my ass and I WISH I knew why. im almost done im ALMOST done but the last bits are just. biting me. im not sure why because I love this fic, I love this concept ive got, but for some reasons the words will not come to me. im wrestling with myself and first drafting- as if I havent been drafting the rest of my fics, INCLUDING the first two chapters- really hard with this one

I think some of it might be because this is my first multi chapter fic since I was... 14? so im just out of practice with scheduled updating. hindsight being 20/20 I would wait to post the start of a multi chapter fic till ive fleshed out the remaining chapters more- im used to multi chapter writing with like, the actual novel im working on, which. ive been working on for several years. im USED to taking my time. and there's nothing wrong with doing that with fics! but next time id go in more prepared so I dont accidentally leave people on a cliffhanger. for over a month

(im gonna finish it in the next few days I swear I SWEAR)

? "Choose a random WIP and talk about it"

hm lets see for this one ill go with... “it’s not chicken soup, but it’s good for the soul”

this one's tagged to Carry On, Hawkeye and its just a scene of Trapper taking care of Hawkeye while he's sick. its gonna be very short, very sweet, it comes from a place of wanting to explore some Hawkeye and Trapper (and Hawkeye/Trapper) feelings and such. I dont write nearly enough with them and I want to do more! and what better way to do that than with one of my fav episodes?

fun fact about this one, I had actually started an early draft ages ago, where it was a scene between Hawkeye and Margaret instead, but I ended up scrapping it. I repurposed some of it into "a good nurse (friend, a good friend)" which is a scene with Margaret taking care of a sick Hawkeye, but its not set in that episode and rather set sometime post-s6. the original draft wasn't working for me the way I wanted it to so I ended up scrapping it, but recently I was thinking about Carry On, Hawkeye again so I decided to try and crack at it with Trapper because ive been meaning to write more with him

listen the MASH tag is full of people clamouring for more hurt Hawkeye and sick Hawkeye and what am I if not a people pleaser. im here to deliver im here to provide the hurt/comfort. also I just love to do this to him. thats how you know he's my fav because I keep putting him in situations or expanding on the situations the show put him into. this is how I show affection

[streetlights-was-taken]

I am VERY close to posting the beginning of time is a vinyl record. god, it's been such a journey to get here. I'm like two (TWO!!) scenes away from finishing the first draft (of the first chapter.......) AND THEN I can finally start a day's worth of editing. shouldn't be that hard since I already edit as I go (I practically have the whole fic memorized now) and I already have my workskin ready so it's more of me doing a bunch of formatting to make it look like the way I want. there is a lot of html coding involved, but eh I already do that for a living so it doesn't really scare me lol.

now you might say, "streetlights, you've been writing this fic since february. it's december. why does it take you almost a year to write one single chapter of a multi-chapter fic?"

what a very valid question! other than the fact that I'm an exceptionally slow writer and don't pressure myself to an update schedule, this fic is just... oh man. once you start reading it, you'll understand why it took me forever to get even just the first chapter done. I've put soooooo much thought into this fic, like you have NO idea how much I've been thinking and researching for this fic for the past year. there's three levels of research here. there's the science part, the archiving part, and the travel part. also, I actually don't write chronologically so I have some scenes written for the next chapters, but they can't be posted yet obviously, so... yeah. it's not like I was only writing the first chapter.

anyway I'm just so happy that I can finally post it soon. I'm on leave now, but I have some real life errands to run still. but I'm aiming to get this done before this week ends, hopefully!

this will sound pretentious but I'm actually kinda nervous because I think this fic isn't the easiest to read, and idk if readers will have the patience for it lol. but I love it SO much and I'm just so so so happy to be close to finishing a part of it. and all that matters in the end is that I'm satisfied with it. of course, I would be extra happy if others will like it too, but I mostly write for myself and this fic is the most challenging fic I've attempted so I'm just so proud of myself for even trying in the first place. if I ever finish this in a way that completely satisfies me, it's honestly going to be my magnum opus as a fic writer. that's how much I love this fic okay. and I hope, for anyone who stumbles upon it, that it will be just as magical and wondrous an experience to read as it was for me to conceptualize and write it

[mygrandmathinksimsassy]

Maddie, I need kindergarten/daycare teacher Ben Solo in my life like I need Adam in a brocade dinner jacket.

(This was initially going to be a prompt fill and now it’s a whole thing that I’ll be posting to AO3)

“You’re a teacher?”

Ben doesn’t look like a teacher. At least not like any teacher Rey has ever had.

Finn covered her halfof rent last month.

Rey thought she’d havegot a research job by now, or at the very least, an internship she could dopart-time while working somewhere else for what would hopefully be more thanminimum wage. She doesn’t need a career just yet, just something that looksdecent enough to talk about if she ends up getting any interviews for any ofthe schools that have asked for secondary applications, but apparently that isasking too much. 

It’s taking a bit toolong to get hired.

Finn might have tohelp with the next month too.

–

She owes him one. Sheowes him thousands of times for everything he’s done for her since they satnext to each other in that physics class he ended up dropping when he decidedpre-med was not for him, but she definitely owes him at least one. 

Finn has been teachingfor about a month now, at the ritzy elementary school on the other side oftown, the one that looks like something out of a movie. It’s the sort of placeshe would have killed to go to as a kid, a place where they send thesixth-graders to a wilderness camp every year and the textbooks were written inthe past decade.

It’s the kind ofschool that has enough money to throw a carnival to welcome back theirstudents.

The kind of carnivalthat apparently needs volunteers.

–

It’s eight on a Fridaynight. Finn has been passing out by nine every night since he’s started, wornout from keeping up with a class of thirty third graders, but he’s wide awakeright now.

Apparently, it’s timeto collect.

“I don’t think I’mqualified to run a first aid tent.“

The Great British Bake-Off drones on in the background when Finn asks herto fill in for a parent volunteer who dropped out the night before. If shemisses Mary Berry complain about a “soggy bottom,” then that defeats the entirepoint of the drinking game she found when drafting cover letters got a bit toooverwhelming.

“It’s not like you’regoing to have to operate on anyone,” Finn says. “We just need a warm body tohand out band-aids. You can say it’s clinical experience. It’ll look good onyour resume.” 

Someone ends updropping their cake, a confection that looks nothing like the tastefulillustration they had been shown at the beginning of the episode. and they bothreach for their glasses of the cheapest wine she could find at Target.

“I will pay you infriendship- “

“We’re already friends.”

“Then I will also payyou in takeout afterward,” Finn tells her. “Whatever you want. My treat.”

“Indian food or I’ll quit.”

“Whatever you want.”

She was always going to say yes. Finn knows that. She knows that.

That doesn’t mean she doesn’t appreciate the bribe.

“Fine,” she says. “I’ll do it.”

“Thank god.” Finn letsout a sigh and sinks back against the couch they found on the side of the roadwhen the college kids moved out of their apartments at the end of the schoolyear. 

It’s still a prettydecent couch. It hardly looks like it came from the street.

“I already signedyou up.”

–

The school Finnteaches at is nice. 

Like really nice.

Nice enough where shefeels bad for showing up in jeans and a t-shirt that she got from doing a 10k afew years back.

The moms are allwearing Lilly Pulitzer in shades that run the gamut from aqua to lavender. Afew of the more daring ones are in green. All of them have blow outs and roundsunglasses perched on their heads complete with iced coffees that seemed gluedto the inside of their hands. 

The dads are all inthe same light blue button down tucked into the same pair of khakis. It’s likethey all agreed on a uniform beforehand and she pities any kids who get losttoday because they are going to have a hell of a time.

She follows Finn througha balloon archway toward a makeshift fairground covered in orange and bluedecorations. A handful of kids wave to him when Finn makes it onto the campus,calling out his name like he’s a rock star trying to make it out of an airport.They are all thrilled when he waves back at them and it’s worth it to volunteereven if it’s just to see how happy Finn is now that he’s in his element.

There are roughly ahundred different booths with different carnival games and kids already liningup to win stuffed animals and way too much candy.

It might be the bestparty she’s ever been to.

–

The first aid tent ison the corner of the makeshift fair grounds, just across from a ring toss gameand right by where someone is setting up a popcorn maker.

The department chairFinn works with, a swanlike woman named Amilyn, is already waiting. She’s got ahead of pink hair with a matching pink stud in her nose and a maxi dressunderneath a flowy rust-colored cardigan. There are Birkenstocks peeking outunderneath the hem of her dress with pink leather straps, ones that lookwell-worn like she’s been holding onto them since Lilith fair.

There was a car in theteacher’s parking lot covered in political bumper stickers urging passersby to“Coexist.”

One guess as to whoseit was.

 "You must beRey,” she says. There’s a unicorn already painted onto her face, but somehow,she makes it work. “Finn has told me so much about you. I feel like I knowyou already.”

She must look panickedat the notoriety because Amilyn smiles in an almost maternal way.

“Only good things,”she tells her. “Let’s get you set up.”

Rey is given a firstaid kit with plenty of band-aids and a cooler filled with water bottles andjuice. There are two folding chairs with “Chandrila Elementary” embroidered inblue fabric on the back and a little trash can just behind the table.

“If you need anything,I’ll be at the face painting booth pretending I know how to draw.” Amilyn givesthe tent a once-over. “Seriously, don’t hesitate to let me know if you needanything.”

“It’s ok,” Rey tellsher. “I’ll be fine.”

When Amilyn leaves thetent, it looks like she’s gliding.

The DJ- the schoolseriously hired a DJ-is playing a “Hey Ya!” at a volume so loud that Rey canbarely hear herself think. There is no chance any of these kids know whatsong is playing, but that doesn’t stop them from dancing. They’re all too youngto care about how they look, dancing just because there is music and because itseems fun, and she lets herself focus on something other than waiting for anyof the places she’s applied to call her back.

It’ll be ok.

If it’s not, there’sonly six hours to go.

–

Running the first aidtent isn’t that bad. Definitely worth the promise of as much takeout Finn iswilling to put on his credit card.

A handful of kids comein with banged up knees from falling on the black top, in need of bandages andjuice boxes before they’re ready to get back to the fun. They’re allsurprisingly well-behaved, all saying please and thank you without anyprompting from the parents who all seem way more worried than they do.

One of the moms stopsby and asks if she has anything for a migraine. When she offers up an Advil- byfar the strongest thing she has- the mom reluctantly accepts.

It’s pleasant. Boring.

Until one of the dadsstops by.

He definitely doesn’tlook the other dads.

For one thing, he’ssoaking wet. His dark hair is dripping, but still long enough to reach where acollar would be and the shirt he’s wearing- a bright orange monstrosity withthe words “Chandrila Coyotes” emblazoned on the front- sticks to his chest. Hischest is broad- big in a way that makes her think he must spend every freemoment in the gym- and she can pretty much see all of it with just how wet heis. His arms look like they might burst through the fabric. She can only hopeshe’s there when they do.

Instead of khakis,he’s in black swim trunks that cling to his thighs. His surprisingly muscularthighs.

The swim trunks clingto other parts too. They are doing an excellent job.

The only thing thatmakes him seem remotely mortal, is just how horrible the color contrast is. Helooks like he’s some sort of walking billboard for Halloween who wanted tostart the ad campaign about two months early, but she finds it in herself toforgive him for the misstep.

He’s definitelydifferent from the other dads.

She tries not tostare, but she must be staring, because it’s like she’s forgotten how to speakuntil he clears his throat.

“I cut my arm onsomething.“ 

He has a nice voice.Deep. The sort of voice people would pay good money to have narrate a naturedocumentary.

She remembers just howwords work and then promptly embarrasses herself.

“Is that how you gotcovered in water?”

“It was my shift inthe dunk tank.” He says this like a dunk tank was the obvious answer, but she’snever really spent much time around kids, so it might very well be. “Someasshole sixth grader spent ten dollars trying to knock me in.”

“I thought that wasthe whole point of a dunk tank.”

He looks at her withexasperation, practically rolling his eyes, and she shrugs her shouldersbecause it’s the only thing she can think to do.

“Can you just look atmy cut?”

She motions to thefree chair and her mystery patient takes a seat. He is too big for the chair,the same way he’s too big for his shirt, and when he holds up his forearm forher to inspect, it’s a wonder she can actually focus on the cut.

He is wet, but whenshe takes his arm, he’s warm.

The cut isn’t too bad-nothing that won’t heal in a couple of days so long as he doesn’t pick at it-but it’s the most blood she’s seen all day, so she can’t really fault him forcoming by. She lets the evaluation take longer than it needs to be, studyingthe muscle in his arm before glancing down at his hands.

He has nice hands,this mystery DILF, big hands that might be larger than her face. There isn’t aring on his finger and she didn’t think she was at that point yet, to ogle strangemen and wonder if they’re married, but apparently, she is. It’s a realizationthat makes her feel a little old, but she doesn’t have enough time to dwell onit when he speaks again.

“What’s the prognosis,doc?”

“I’m not entirelysure,” she says. She’s still holding onto his arm, but he doesn’t pull away, soshe keeps holding on. “But I think it’ll have to come off.”

He smiles at that,revealing teeth that are big and white and imperfect. His eyes crinkle up allsmall and she is so pleased with herself, so pleased to have earned this smile,that she can barely stand it.

“I figured as much.”His voice is completely dead pan when his face fades back into an exasperatedneutrality. “Just give me some whiskey and a stick to bite on and we’re good toamputate.” 

“I don’t have anybooze with me.” 

“That’s a shame.”Mystery DILF lets out a melodramatic sigh, but his lips still curl up at theends, the ghost of a smile. “I’ll just settle for gangrene.”

She smiles before shereaches into the first-aid kit and pulls out a fresh baby wipe to mop up theblood.

Mystery DILF watchesher when she cleans his cut, in a way that makes her acutely aware ofeverything that she’s doing, every brush of the wipe against his muscularforearm, every time she sucks in a breath. The way he looks at her makes timeslow down somehow, until the dulcet tones of “Gangnam Style” blaring in thebackground fade completely away.

It’s overwhelming, notin a bad way, just overwhelming and so she tries to make conversation becauseit feels like she might float off the ground.

“How old are yourkids?”

“I don’t have any kids,”he scoffs. “I work here.” 

“You’re a teacher?” 

He doesn’t look like ateacher. At least not like any teacher she’s ever had.

“Would I be at anelementary school carnival if I weren’t?” Mystery not-DILF says. “I’m herebecause I have to be. Trust me, I have better things to do.”

He hasn’t beenbleeding for a few minutes now, but she can’t stop touching his arm.

“Most people likecarnivals.”

“Most people don’thave to deal with parents bugging them the entire time,” he says. “We’ve onlyhad two weeks of classes and I already have at least five different peopleasking about their kid’s college readiness. It just starts earlier eachyear.“

“What grade do youteach?”

She’s thinking sixthgrade. It’s a nice image, the thought of him unraveling the mysteries of theancient world, using his deep voice to introduce kids to the classics.

“Kindergarten.”

“Bullshit.”

She snorts, and helooks like she slapped him.

“It’s notbullshit,” he says. “I promise.”

“You don’t seem like akindergarten teacher.” She struggles to find the right word for what she’strying to convey, to reconcile the thought of this man with his broad shouldersand deadpan expression surrounded by screaming kids that just barely come uppast his knee. “Kindergarten teachers are supposed to be…”

“Supposed to bewomen?” He says with a smug expression. “I get that a lot.”

“That’s not what I wasgoing to say.” 

“What was it then?” Heraises his eyebrows expectantly. “Enlighten me, doctor.”

“They are supposed tobe nice.”

“I happen to bevery nice.” 

“I don’t know,” shesays with a shrug. “You just called a kid an asshole like five minutes ago.”

“I’ve known that kidsince he was five. I know for a fact that he is an asshole,” he tells her.“That doesn’t mean I’m not nice.”

He doesn’t seem like amean person, but she doubts that this man is nice.

Nice men don’t wearshirts that cling to every muscle. Nice men don’t look like him.

“How did you end upworking the first aid tent in the first place?” He asks. “You just decided tobe a Good Samaritan for the day?”

“My roommate just startedworking here last month,” Rey tells him. “He guilted me into volunteeringbecause he knew that I didn’t have anything better to do.” 

“Who’s your roommate?”

“Finn Abejide,” shetells him. “He’s teaching third grade.”

“I know who he is,”the guys says. “I didn’t know he had a roommate.” 

He says this likehaving a roommate is some grand revelation. Which is bullshit.

Lots of people have roommates.

“Well now youdo.”

She lifts the secondbaby wipe from his arm and reluctantly lets go.

“What type of band-aid do you want?”

“Surprise me.”

She chooses two of thebandages from the most sparkly of the boxes she’s been provided.

Not because she thinkshe’ll be embarrassed. If he chose to wear that shirt, then he’s definitely pastthe point of embarrassment. But because it amuses her. Because the quickershe picks out a band-aid, the quicker she can get back to touching him.

She gently adheres theband-aids- purple ones with horses printed all over- and he smirks when helooks down.

“Twilight Sparkle,” hesays. “Excellent choice” 

“How do you know MyLittle Pony?” She zips up the first-aid kit. “They’re a little after your time.”

“I spend most of myweek with five-year olds,” he says. “I have forgotten more about My Little Ponythan most people will ever know.” 

He leans back in hischair and there’s no real reason for him to stay- he’s no longer bleeding andhe’s all patched up, so she uses the only tool left at her disposal.

“Do you want ajuice box?” She reaches into the cooler, fishing for what’s left of herhaul. “I’ve been giving them to every patient.”

"Sure,” he says. “Whynot?”

She hands one to him.When he takes it, his fingers brush against hers.

His hands are way toobig for the juice box-it’s meant for someone tiny and everything about him ishuge- and when he jams the straw in, a few droplets splatter on her shirt.

“Sorry about that,” hesays sheepishly. “I didn’t mean to get you wet.” 

He realizes what he’sjust said just about when she realizes it.

His mouth gets allsmall like he just sucked on a lemon and she is not blushing, why would she beblushing. That would be stupid. 

The silence that hangsbetween them is almost painful. The conversation that follows is even worse.

"This is good juice.”

"It came with thetent.”

“Still goodthough.” 

He finishes the juicebox in another lengthy sip. When he’s done, he crumples it into a ball and aimsfor the little recycling bin in the corner. The crumpled juice box landswith a thud.

When he stands up fromhis chair, she has to crane her neck up just to take him all in.

"I’ll see youaround.”

He leaves her with anod, the sort of stilted one guys use to greet each other on the street, andshe nods right back.

It’s only after he’sgone that she realizes she never got his name 

–

The booth is prettymuch dead for the rest of the day and so she watches the ring toss game sinceher phone is essentially dead.

A little boy, probablykindergarten age but there’s no way she really can tell has spent the lastthirty minutes trying to win a stuffed animal. His aim is terrible, bad enoughwhere half the rings land on the ground, and she can hear the beginnings of atantrum when her Patient Zero swoops in.

He’s basically tallerthan the booth so it doesn’t take him that long to land all three rings on thebottles set up behind the partition. The woman behind the booth hands him astuffed animal alligator and then he crouches down so he’s eye level to thekid.

He hands the alligatorto the kid- a dark haired little boy with skinned knees- and the boy sweeps himinto a hug. Her patient hugs right back and she looks away when he catches herwatching.

–

She looks for him whenthey walk back to Finn’s car, hoping to get a name or maybe even another smile.

But Patient Zero isalready gone when they leave 

–

Finn buys enoughtakeout to last them through the weekend.

"I promise Ididn’t mean to abandon you-“ Finn opens one of the containers and the smell ofsamosas fills the air. Her stomach rumbles like she’s just remembering thatshe’s hungry and she looks forward to the food coma that is sure to come. “-Ihad to convince like twenty of my kids to ask for balloon animal snakes becauseI couldn’t figure out how to make anything else.”

"It’s alright.”She spoons half the Chana Masala onto her plate. It might the happiest she’sever been to see a chickpea. "One of the teachers got hurt so we hung outfor a bit.

"Who wasit?”

“I don’t know,” shesays. “A guy teacher.”

“Was it Mr. Yoda?”Finn asks hopefully “Because I want him to be my grandpa. I will give him theadoption papers to sign if I ever figure out his first name.“

"This guy wasn’treally grandpa age.” Her mouth is still half full. "I didn’t get his name.He was a kindergarten teacher. Tall.”

“Are you talkingabout Ben Solo?" 

“You know I don’t knowwho that is.” 

"You would knowwho he is. He’s a dick.” She studies each portion of the last samosa beforefinally taking the one that’s about three millimeters thicker. Finn pops theother half in his mouth but that doesn’t stop him from ranting. “He’s the onlyguy even close to our age and I think he’s said like three words to me since Istarted. I literally have not seen him talking to another adult.  It’slike he’s made it his mission in life not to make any friends.”

 "I don’t know.”

She reaches for thelast samosa and thinks about the man who won a crying kid a toy.

“Heseemed nice.”

[lurkinglurkerwholurks]

fic writer interview

Name(s): Lurker, [redacted]

Fandoms: Fic-wise, primarily BatFam with three MCU fics (bet some of you didn’t know that didja)

Where you post: Ao3 and Tumblr

Most popular one-shot (by kudos): Emergency Contact because y’all love Tim Drake getting hugs

Overall: I assume this means by hits? If so, then Dry Drowning because y’all are Dick & Dami suckers.

This year: Oh this has been such a baaad fic year thus far. I haven’t done any one-shots yet, unless you count these cross-posted headcanons

Most Popular Multi-chap (also by kudos): If the Sky Comes Falling Down (For You) because y’all love Jason Todd being dragged back into the fam against his will

Overall: Nature & Nurture, my behemoth, my magnum opus (but The Return is literally poised to catch up within weeks and it’s freaking me out)

This year: See previous note about bad fic year. I did add a chapter to The Return, so that’s something?

Favorite story you’ve written so far: I harrumph at this question because I never know how to answer. Maybe Breathing? I remain a TQT stan. (Please read Megan Whalen Turner she will change your life.)

Fic you were nervous to post: Uhhh. I feel like @audreycritter would be able to answer better because I tend to babble my insecurities to her, but off the top of my head? Mother Bruce and His Baby Birds because it was my very first.

How do you choose your titles: With great exasperation.

Do you outline: Nah. If it’s a multi-chapter, I might jot down some really vague thoughts of where I want it to go or a key moment I want to hit (or even a dialogue snippet I’m working toward), but I’m very much a pantser.

Complete: 68

In progress: Two, and they haunt me (ironically)

Coming soon: The next chapter for The Return and the next chapter for Ghost, hopefully.

Not started: IDK. Isn’t every little fragment of an idea technically an unstarted fic?

Prompts?: No. My brain will start to sputter out black smoke and then you will get no fics whatsoever.

Upcoming work you’re most excited about: Again, IDEK. It’s been a weird time.

I was tagged by @rose-blooms-red and I tag anyone who would like to participate. In fact, because I know how you shy folk operate, if you would like to be tagged and don’t consider an open invite enough of a tag, DM me and I’ll edit this to add you in.

[mprosperossprite]

I Made Stuff in 2020

Shoutout to @nevermindirah for the tag

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 favorite works (fics, art, edits, etc.) you’ve created this year and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you’ve brought into the world in 2020. If you don’t have five published works, that’s fine! Include ideas/drafts/whatever you like that you’ve worked on/thought about, and talk a little about them instead! Remember, this is all about self-love and positive enthusiasm, so fuck the rules if you need to. Have fun, and tag as many fellow creators as you like so they can share the love! <3

In 2020 I re-watched Leverage, which led me to tumblr, which led me to seeing these posts about this movie The Old Guard, which led me to watch one of the best films I’ve ever seen, which led me to AO3, which led me to discord. Before falling down The Old Guard rabbit hole, I hadn’t written fanfiction since 2012. Unsurprisingly, a lot has changed since 2012 for me and for the internet. For the first time since my participation in internet fandom, I feel like I’ve found a community online and that is probably the big theme of this post: making for each other has been an absolute joy in an otherwise pretty shit year.

This is not really a year in review, so much as a last two months review (my first fic of the year was published on November 2nd) but it’s been a utterly delightful and impactful couple of months, so here we are. On to the fics!

1. The Sport of Bright Steel - This was the fic that started it all.  Someone on the Old Guard kinkmeme prompted a Joe/Nicky fic from the POV of their swords and I sat down on my couch one Saturday morning and an hour later had a lil piece of fanfiction all written out. And then I panicked that it was terrible and weird and so posted it anonymously to the kinkmeme. And then someone in the discord rec-ed it in the fanfic channel and then I dusted off my old AO3 account and posted for the first time in 8 freaking years.

2. Our Toil Shall Strive to Mend - This was my second foray back into fanfic (once again, inspired by a kinkmeme prompt), and the first multi-chaptered fic I ever wrote. Big manly man with tiny human? I am weak. I love all of the Old Guard characters, but I think Booker will forever be my favorite to explore in fic. Unlike the others, Booker is a reluctant soldier and much of his pain comes from losing his identity as a husband and father. This fic asks what if Booker’s path to healing comes in the form of fatherhood? Writing the last chapter made me cry happy-sad tears for him.

3. The Perfect Shot - From the idea that both snipers and photographers are in search of “the perfect shot” came this delightfully silly little fic. Nicolo di Genova, sniper and international man of mystery, knows one damn pun/pick-up line and just so happens to find the one man (Joe, photojournalist) whom it works on hook-line-sinker. Everything about this is fun and makes me happy. Never in a million year would I have written this, if not for a very silly post on this website that someone on discord suggested as a Joe/Nicky prompt. Inspiration strikes in the most unexpected of ways. And I fucking love puns, y’all.

4. This Rough Magic - Nicky is a selkie who accidentally get himself married to unsuspecting, marine scientist Joe and it might be my favorite thing I’ve written all year. It’s a story about identity and the unexpected and being willing to take a leap of faith. This fic would not have happened without the discord, and made me so so grateful and happy to be creating with other people and as part of a community. The joy of fanfic is that it is freely created and given, and I never would have dared to write this story without the inspiration, support, and enthusiasm from internet friends. 

5. Bring the World Back into Tune - aka my Book of Nile opus, still a work in progress. Technically it’s a Hades/Persephone fusion, but really it’s about finding family, finding healing, and finding love, about making meaningful choices despite whatever fate or the supernatural has in mind. I fell into Book of Nile because who they are beyond being immortal has so much in common: growing up basically ghettoized in a country that doesn’t give a damn about you, fighting for an imperial army because there were no other viable choices, knowing the pain of missing 1st families. In Bring the World Back into Tune I love that I get to explore what it means to be fated for something (they’ve become Hades and Persephone without realizing it, in addition to the whole immortal thing), and also what it means to still get to choose how you arrive at and cope with that fate. Very few people are reading this on AO3, but it’s something I love working on and through because the characters and ideas are so compelling.

Honorable Mention: Leaving AO3 Comments - One of my greatest joys this year has been in giving to others the kind of love and support I’ve received as a person who makes stuff on the internet. I love leaving AO3 comments, and applying my English major brain to what I’m reading. The things we love most are deserving of our critical attention, including and especially fanfiction. I’ve met fandom soul-mates in the AO3 comments and befriended authors. In response to a shitty anon comment on another fic, I crafted what might be my fanfic manifesto: why fanfic is the heir of western storytelling moreso than our popular media and why the “expectedness” of fanfic is in fact its greatest feature, not it’s biggest flaw. It is A+ work, if I do say so myself.

None of this would have been possible without the internet (the kinkmeme, tumblr, discord, and of course AO3) and, perhaps more importantly, without the great, supportive Old Guard fan communities. Thank you for the beautiful fic and stunning art. For the thoughtful meta and funny headcanons. For the cheering and screaming and encouragement. For the kudos and comments. We make for ourselves and each other and that’s a truly remarkable thing.

Thanks to @hyper-fixate @sweetlyenchains and many others for being so lovely and kind and making my 2020 better with The Old Guard fic and art and thinking and community. If y’all are inspired to do this year end recap too (whether tagged or not), please tag me! I’d love to read about your triumphs too!

[kaidans-alenko]

Author interview

I was tagged by @ghostxofxartemis thank you <333

Tagging: @confunderewrites @crqstalite @shepard-warden-commander

1. Name

spaceprincealenko ✌

2. Fandoms

Mass Effect Trilogy might dabble in andromeda one of these day, haven’t yet so who knows

3. Where you post

AO3 and Tumblr

4. Most popular oneshot

one that got away my magnum opus sskdkskdk 

It’s a I guess you could say post war fic about Kaidan and Rahna running to each other at a bar I am quite proud of it :^)

5. Most popular multichapter

Idk why because my asexual ass can’t write smut but it’s collection of smutty one shots I wrote for...some reason

I suppose i’ll link it *shrugs* mass effect smut prompts

6. Actual worst part of writing

Editing, I hate it with every fiber of my being

7. Favorite story you wrote

Melancholy requiem, its almost over and the more I think about it the sadder I get orz

8. Story you were nervous to post

asdffghhjkl all of them

9. How you choose your titles

Taylor swift songs lmaooo

10. Complete works

I write a lot of one shots so quite a few 

11. Incomplete works

like 4

2 I gave up on

2 i’m still working on

12. Do you outline?

Um it depends, melancholy requiem and I am for this shenko multi chapter i’m writing but if it’s a one shot meh

13. Coming soon ideas

Yes! it’s my canon shenko fic not quite enemies to lovers but it’s mutually unrequited so do with that what you will. So far i’ve dubbed it “willow” because of willow tree symbolism and that one ts song(as stated above) it’s been fun so far i’m loving Kaidan’s indifference towards Lily’s attitude with him. I always write them being hopelessly in love even tho it didn’t at all start that way. 

14. Ask me anything: Best writing traits?

ummmm you know I don’t know lol

15. Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited to Write

The shenko fic I mentioned, it’s been fun to draft and outline so i’m excited to finally get to focus on it after melancholy requiem I have no intention to rush either but i’m definitely jittery 

16. Spicy Tangential Opinion

people need to leave Kaidan out of their shakarin fics if all they’re going to do is paint a MAN OF COLOR as a rapist. It’s really not a good look, if you’re just gonna treat him like garbage so Garrus can swoop in and save Shepard then he needs to stay out of your fic and you need to keep his name out of your mouth. End of story. Unless you wanna see Garrus treated that way don’t treat Kaidan that way. It’s getting old.

Haha anyway! :^D

[emjee]

Tagged by: @morallygreywaren​! Thank you so much, sorry it took me a few days to get around to it. 

Name(s): my AO3 handle when I started writing fic in high school/early college was MerryHeart, which is a Much Ado About Nothing reference; when I came back to fic in college I switched to emjee, which is just MG phonetically. MG stands for my Real Name, which is far too distinctive to be shared on the wilds of this here website.

Fandom(s): right now it’s mostly The Old Guard and like, a sprinkle of the old standbys (Austen, Shakespeare, Les Miserables, etc). Pre-TOG, Black Sails and Good Omens. Pre-that, and we start to peer back into my Beauty and the Beast days.

Where you post: AO3, pretty much exclusively. I’ve done a couple of ficlets here recently but those also get put up on AO3. 

Most Popular One Shot (by kudos) 
this year: You do not have to be good, which frankly might go down as my magnum opus, certainly of this year if not of the rest of my fic writing career.

Most Popular Multi-Chapter (by kudos)
 this year: The Marriage of Heaven and Hell. Y’all I’m so sorry that I’m so bad at finishing multi-chapter fics.

Favorite story you’ve written so far:
 I’m just looking at what I’ve written this year, but I’m very fond of All that I know is I don’t know a thing.

Fic you were nervous to post: You do not have to be good, because there’s a lot about it that’s personal and I was in a delicate emotional place when I wrote it.

How do you choose your titles?: I try to choose them while I’m still working on the fic so that I’m not staring down the title box on AO3 at the eleventh hour, but they are almost exclusively references to lyrics/literature.

Do you outline?: I daydream ferociously and usually have a sort of mental scene breakdown in my head. If there are details I really make sure I want to include I’ll make a list, but it doesn’t really get any more thorough than that.

Complete: 43 works (!) which includes things I wrote under my other pseud, as well as multichapter works that are unlikely to get finished.

In-Progress: the TOG library AU. It’s just two kind people who like each other a lot having honest emotional conversations and making out and getting teased by their friends/colleagues.

Coming soon/not yet started: I have a couple of TOG one-shots coming up, of the sexy variety.

Prompts?: Almost all of my fic recently has been inspired by posts people have made. I appreciate the inspiration and I like taking an idea and running with it.

Upcoming work you’re most excited about: I mean this library AU is the most self-indulgent thing I’ve ever written so I can’t wait for it to be complete so I can read it again and again.

[sweetjekyll]

Writerly contemplation tag!

tagged by the lovely @j-pping; thank you for the tag!

this might end up being long so I’ll add a read more cut ☺️

2020

what was the most challenging part of writing this year?

I guess the most challenging part of writing this year was tuning out the real world. I’ve always used reading and writing as a form of coping and escapism from all the things that were troubling me. Unfortunately there were times when simply reading and writing weren’t helping me and I took so many breaks, postponed so many WIPs I was excited about... I ended up beating myself down for not being able to keep up with an expectation I had for myself and my writing. Considering 2020 was hell for everyone, I came to terms with myself that it cannot be always my fault, I can’t blame myself for not being able to do things I set my mind to do, sometimes there are obstacles that take time for you to cross.

I’m just going to quickly mention stressful anons and hopefully get a point across for all fan fictions writers. WE ARE NOT ROBOTS. WE ARE HUMAN. All of us write for many personal reasons, mine are that I just love writing things which I wish to read! Simple as that. What I wish for some rude people to understand is that the least you could do for us creators is be thankful and be kind to us, give feedback and constructive criticism, share our work. I don’t understand why you are scared of the reblog button. When I go through my notes and take a look at some blogs, they are empty. No one is paying us to contribute creatively to the fandom, you are enjoying our content for free while we put hard work and our free time into it, so why should we “hurry up”, “update faster” and “write more/this/that”? Please, remember that we are people too, and the toxicity some people spread on anonymous asks is just incredibly baffling and hurtful to me. If you, as a reader, believe that my request is nonsense and my words are too harsh, then perhaps you should reconsider how you’re viewing content creators before disagreeing without a valid reason.

what was the most enjoyable/rewarding part of writing this year?

The happiness that came from writing something which I enjoyed reading as well! I have been a writer for years on another platform until I had to take a long hiatus because of writer’s block and depression. For how cheesy this may sound, the most enjoyable and rewarding part of writing is in fact writing something that makes me happy even if I’m torturing my characters and traumatizing them. There is truly no point for me to write things that I don’t feel I am enjoying. As I have said other times before on the blog, I would much rather post something that makes me happy, than post something just to get notes from silent readers.

what piece has left the most impact on you and why?

Given the fact that I have not written a lot because of my constant mental health breaks (yes 2020 had me on rollercoaster mental breakdowns more often than usual), I have to say that Damaged is what really kept me entertained with myself and perhaps sane. It has been way too long since I’ve taken on something so creative as building an entire universe from just a dream, but it’s what reminded me why I love writing so much, it reignited my passion. With this story I really wanted to challenge myself to write something unique, something I’ve never done before with any other work... And I admit it’s quite difficult; the easiest part was taking inspiration from EXO’s lore, but the hardest was incorporating it in a universe and storyline completely different to the original concept. It’s something I’m set on finishing as a complete multi-chapter story no matter how long it takes.

what have you learned about yourself through the process of writing in the past year?

To be completely honest, I learned that I can push myself out of my comfort zone when writing, because every piece is a fictional world of its own, every character can be more than a copy and paste personality. What do I truly learn about myself if I don’t explore things I have not thought about before? I learned that I should not be afraid to write of things that I don’t know or fully understand, specifically about things that I didn’t post but tried for just for fun. It is a good way of finding out whether a certain subjects interests me or doesn’t. I love doing lots of research and gather information for the stories I’m writing, you get to learn about stuff you usually would never think about.

how has your writing changed in the past year? how have you grown?

Well, I don’t really have anything to compare my writing to except my older fan fictions for movies and tv shows. I guess I have changed quite a lot since 2018; my writing style has become more fluid, at least I think it has. I’m also able to write longer chapters without feeling as if I am dragging it out for the sake of the word count, yet now I have to literally stop myself from just writing too much! It pleases me, to be honest. I remember struggling to sometimes put ideas into words and balance narrative, dialogue and descriptions.

2021

ignoring your wips for a second, if you had all the time and energy in the world to write your magnum opus piece, what would it be about? why is that the dream story you’d write, all other things controlled for?

This can go back to Damaged, honestly! It’s something that I haven’t finished writing and it will be a long story. It’s the fan fiction which has gotten me out of a 2-year-long writer’s block with such strength, I feel truly attached to it. As I mentioned in one of my first answers for 2020, this is the WIP I want to focus on the most and be proud of it.

how do you want to grow in your writing this year?

I mentioned this is my first 2021 post after I took a short break, but one of my resolutions for this year is to work on self acceptance when it comes to my projects. (I’ll copy and paste what I wrote there so I don’t repeat myself with other words) One of my resolutions for 2021 is to write more, to not be afraid of beginning something and even if I end up setting the story aside, at least I will have gotten it out on (digital) paper. I punish myself way too much when I’m not able to finish something, and that is truly one of the worst things a content creators can go through, in my opinion. I have many drafted works that may or may never be published and I wish to appreciate them more instead of dwelling on the fact of what they could have been.

what’s one thing you’d wish to see in the fan-writing community this year?

I wish for more love and recognition of the amazing and talented writers that share their content with everyone on tumblr. We are a community, or at least we are supposed to be. I would absolutely love to see more readers actively interacting with writers, share ideas, share art inspired by what you read! As readers, you can contribute as well by sharing moodboards, song recommendations and/or playlists! You are more than welcome to join us in the community as writers too! 

As for myself, I have mentioned this towards last year but I still want to compile a list of all the writers I am currently following and read their works. I haven’t been in a good mindset to do that for a long time and I wish to get to know them. I’m a pretty shy person who struggles to start up a conversation, so I hope I get to make some friends on tumblr this year!

name one new thing you want to try doing in your writing this year.

I would like to make a list of aus and experiment with them for either one shots or some short series! I have so many creative ideas and thoughts but I always forget to take a note or maybe I’m doing something else and I end up getting caught up in a stream of consciousness, until I lose the initial spark. Also mentioned plenty of times, I would love to write for other groups, like nct, but for now I’ll focus on exo.

✨✨✨

anyway, that was it for my writerly contemplation tag!

I’m tagging a few fellow writers, but feel free to ignore for any reason! sorry if I forgot someone but feel free to do this even if I didn’t tag you!! @pororodks @velvetsehun @yeoldontknow @yeagerluvr @soos-goddess @shaalk @mooneylooney1 @dewbebe

[monsterfucker-lisa-swallows]

12.28.20

So. 10 years.

Yeah, today is the 10 year anniversary of me making this blog. I’d previously been an Amy Pond roleplay blog, but I tired of that after a few weeks and deleted that and made this instead. It marked the beginning of the end for my DeviantART, which I deleted a few months later.

I can’t believe I’ve been on this site for 10 years, but also can’t imagine being anywhere else. This place is part of my routine now, and I can’t imagine life without this outlet. This bastion of Old Internet Anonymity. Sure, my drafts have been broken for 2 years, but that’s Tumblr.

Thank you to everyone who’s been with me over the years, even if we’ve fallen out of touch. Special thanks to @robincrowe, @empathetic-vibrations, and my gf @super-skitty who migrated with me from DeviantART back when I was still 10nant-Fangirl. Thanks to people like @doll-frakking-house who’ve been here almost as long. Thank you all.

If you want more content from me, I post music news/trivia as well as a song each day over on my music blog, the-music-dealer.

I also post frequently on Archive of Our Own under the name the-red-rabbit. I post...

Good Omens:

“This Was Originally Called ‘Temptation Waits’, But the Title Was Left in the Car”

Ineffable Wives AU focusing on the 6000 years.

“Child in a Seacave”

Some time after the narrowly averted apocalypse, Crowley receives a message from God. But will he agree to answer her? Written because I have trauma with my own parents, but I was keeping my trans readers in mind when I wrote this one.

“Crimson and Clover”

Aziraphale tries chat-up lines.

Good Omens Series:

As Heaven is Wide Series:

Part 1: As Heaven is Wide

Aziraphale and Crowley decide to take a post-apocalypse road trip to see the world, but it gets cut short when they come upon a teenage girl who (despite her protests) needs to be rescued. Things get more complicated when they find themselves once again in direct opposition of heaven, and they have to wonder if it's worth upending their shaky peace with heaven to keep her safe.

There are trigger warnings on this multi-chapter series, but I don't go into real graphic detail because I don't think the story needs that. As someone with trauma, I don't think it's productive to be incredibly graphic. I deal more in implications and off-screen for that type of material. (If you've read some of my other stuff, this one is positively tame compared to that.)

Part 2: Perfect

While Aziraphale finds himself quite comfortable with the trials of parenthood, Crowley finds that raising a teenager is more challenging than he'd expected.

Part 3: Going to Hell (In Progress and Updating today)

Sending their daughter to her first day at school was always going to be a challenge for Aziraphale and Crowley. After all, she still hasn't got a grip on her magic and the thought of being apart from her causes them some portion of anxiety. They just want her to enjoy her new life and fit in, but that's a little hard to do when a lost ghost appears to ask her for help.

Yeah, this one's definitely inspired by Buffy the Vampire Slayer, except instead of metaphors for growing up as a general thing, it's specifically metaphors for obstacles for healing from trauma.

Community:

“And a (Short) Movie”

The study group tries to define the word 'himbo'.

“Community: The Movie (One By One They All Just Fade Away)”

It's been 5 years since Abed Nadir left for Hollywood to pursue a career in film. When he receives a call in the dead of night from Greendale, Colorado, it becomes his responsibility to deliver the news to the rest of his old study group. He embarks on an epic journey to track down Troy Barnes on his boat.

Dean-dong, the Dean is dead.

But is he?

Jeff Winger isn't so sure. He enlists the help of his old "study buddy" Annie Edison to use her FBI skills to find out what really happened to Craig Pelton.

When the study group returns to Greendale, they find that the school has been bought out by Hot Topic. Britta, who liked Hot Topic back "before it sold out", immediately channels her grief into protesting it. But when she meets a fellow anarchist who has vowed to take down the chain from the inside, she's forced to contend with the fact that shouting opinions isn't the same as creating meaningful change.

I have one Hannibal/Willy Wonka fic that I wrote for fun: “Lollirot”

Willy Wonka is a humble man with a dream of making candy for all the children of the world. When he starts running out of ideas for new confections, he seeks help for his depression. His doctor, Hannibal Lecter, is a strangely charming man with unorthodox ideas for how a factory should be run. Before long, Will starts to experience paranoid delusions about his competitors and loses his grip on reality as he sinks deeper into self-imposed isolation with nobody but his doctor to guide him.

A prequel to the show Hannibal.

One Grinch fic: “How the Grinch Got Therapy”

Epilogue to How the Grinch Stole Christmas empathizing with the Grinch. Because as a person with religious trauma, especially centered around Christmas, I think it's about time that we stop shaming people for not having fun during Christmas. Some people won't celebrate and it's weird how we're all expected to assimilate.

And my magnum opus, the fic I’ve been working on off and on for 10 years even since my DeviantART days...

Doctor Who Fic Series:

Am I...Ginger?:

Season 1: Am I...Ginger?

The Doctor swore off companions after Journey's End, believing himself too dangerous to be around them. But while looking for members of the Trickster's Brigade, he stumbled upon a child of Torchwood that made him question all that.

Of course, there's another problem. He was warned that the Trickster had a weapon, one that could defeat him once and for all. He follows the clues to London, where he finds a nameless woman whose love of history does not include sharing her own. Could she be the weapon he was warned about? Is he just interested in her as a distraction from his own mortality? Can she be saved this time? Can any of them? Or are they doomed to life the way it was written?

(Set between the Wedding of Sarah Jane Smith and the Waters of Mars.)

(There are trigger warnings, but as always it only applies to one specific chapter and potential mentions. But this will deal with issues that people might find distasteful.)

Season 2: Am I...Ginger? The Mourning After (In Progress and Updating Today)

Picking up right from where season 1 left off.

"The Doctor's dead."

That's where this story left off. Despite many attempts to contact him, he's been nowhere to be found. But DOES that mean he's dead? The ragtag group of misfits he left behind keep having conflicting thoughts on the subject. Is he dead? Held hostage somewhere in need of rescue? Just avoiding them?

Just when they give up hope, the Doctor decides to crash his own funeral. Two funeral crashings in a row, that has to be a record for him. But can he still fit in the world he left behind, or has he changed too much? Is it even a good idea to try?

Set when Amy and Rory are on their honeymoon (between "A Christmas Carol" and "The Impossible Astronaut"). This is also just after "The Death of the Doctor" episode of the Sarah Jane Adventures. As usual, I'm playing fill-in-the-blanks with unexplored parts of canon.

...

10 years flew by. You guys have been there with me through some of the toughest parts of my life. I made this blog when I was still a 15 year old in an abusive home and it’s been with me ever since. So let’s hope the next 10 years will be better lmao.

[lycorogue]

Tag Game: Authors

Tagged by: @livrever

Author name: I make life easy for everyone. I’m LycoRogue just about everywhere.

Fandoms I write for: I mostly write for Miraculous Ladybug, starting in the fandom late 2017. In the past (about 2010-2013), I was almost exclusively writing for the “Hey, Arnold!” fandom. While not as many, I’ve also started up some Fruits Basket stories once the reboot began airing last year. Beyond those normal fandoms, I’ve also thrown in random fics for any old thing that has caught my attention: a couple of stories for the Enderverse series, a random story based on a song about zombies, a one-shot teaser about a Cirque du Soleil show, and oddly only one Legend of Zelda story even though that’s probably my favorite fandom outside of ML. I’ve also had some “fanfics” that were MOSTLY original works based vaguely in the worlds of pre-established properties, such as backstories and side stories for my D&D characters, a short-lived attempt to recap the World of Darkness - Vampire: The Masquerade LARP I was in, and stories for the original characters I created for an X-Men play-by-post. The PbP, called X-Future, was a game where all of the playable characters were OCs that only occasionally interact with canon Marvel characters.

Where I post: You can find my works here on Tumblr (tag #LycoRogue Fanfic), over on AO3, on FFN, and - if you’re desperate - I still post to DA.

Most popular one-shot: Based only on AO3′s stats, it would be my Lukanette birthday gift for @thetauruspixie: I Was Thinking of You  (As of 3/6/20: it has 1773 hits and 208 kudos)

OK, this became long because that’s just who I am... 9_9 So... if you want to know more about me, check below the break. ^_^

Favorite story I wrote: I have a multi-chapter story and a one-shot. Both are for ML. The multi-chapter story is Peeping Tomcat, and it is my magnum opus! It started off as one of the first-ever fanfics I wrote for the fandom, and then I realized it had LOADS more story to tell. It is the first multi-chapter story I’ve completed, despite starting and abandoning about a half-dozen before it. This is my baby! The story is about Chat Noir checking in on Marinette once when he thought she was in danger, and then got addicted to innocently spying on her in her bedroom in order to learn more about her while she’s relaxed and most “herself”. I have a sequel that has been in the works for nearly 2yrs now. Yes, I AM still working on the sequel One and the Same, in case any of my readers were nervous about that....

The one-shot is Build Your Own Luck which is a headcanon story about where I believe that lucky charm bracelet Marinette gave Adrien originally came from. It’s a sweet family-bonding story that I loved so much that I’m tying it into my Peeping Tomcat canon. The story behind The BraceletTM will appear in One and the Same.

I also really love one of those “mostly original” stories for X-Future. It was a story originally written by @cyhyr‘s spouse, but when I corrected him on how my character Willow would have truly acted in that situation we decided to make it a collab story. Then it became monstrous, and I think I overwhelmed him. So it’s kind of been in limbo for a few years, but I periodically go back to that project every couple of months, really wanting to get it back down to a manuscript he can manage so we can complete it. For anyone interested, the as-of-now-unofficially-abandoned story is Please, Let Me Explain. In the roleplay, his character Devon left the Xavier Institute to find out more about the parents that abandoned him as an infant. About 1/2hr later, the school gets destroyed in an attack, and the surviving students and faculty believe Devon had something to do with it. Two years later, Devon returns to the school, surprised to find out there were any survivors after spending the last 20 months or so “avenging” all of the students’ deaths. My character Willow is pissed at Devon. He wants to prove his innocence to her. Things are complicated....

Story I was nervous to post: I mean, I’m always nervous to put my heart and soul out there; screaming into the void. Especially when I write things that are more original-leaning. Or when I’m writing gifts for people, especially for those fandom exchanges. Those are terrifying because you know virtually nothing about the person you’re writing for, so you don’t truly know if they’ll like it. I still have a couple of stories that resulted in complete radio-silence from the receiver. 

The one I was MOST nervous about though? Probably one I’m still nervous about sharing here. It’s my first-ever published smut for a fandom I didn’t even know existed until last summer and has seemingly died off since the book series completed back in like 2012. My story is called Sparks for the Moment and is for the story Bitterblue within the Seven Kingdoms Trilogy (also known as the Graceling Series). It’s a bittersweet sex scene that takes place between canonical scenes at the end of the story, so beware spoilers.

How do I choose titles:  Oh lord, how DO I choose titles!? It’s usually a truly grueling process because I try to stick to 4 rules of thumb:  1. Something that is significant to the story, be it an item or a phrase or a theme, etc. 2. Something that gives you an idea of the feel of the story based on the title (I have no clue if I ever succeeded on this) 3. Something easy to remember; generally less than 5 words long. 4. A title that isn’t already being used by another author (this makes things REAL tricky)

Do you outline? Ummmmm.... Once upon a time? No. I was a full-on pantser. Then, more-or-less when I was working on Peeping Tomcat I became more of a plantser. I now have a skeleton of what I want to write, and try to get as much figured out as I can, only for the characters to go “HAHAHA. Nope.” and then I just kinda follow them.

Complete: 35

Cirque du Soleil (1) Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game) (2) Enderverse (2) Fruits Basket (4) Hey Arnold! (7) Re: Your Brains - Jonathan Coulton (Song) (1) The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild (1) Miraculous Ladybug (16) Seven Kingdoms Trilogy - Kristin Cashore (1)

Incomplete (I added this one for ReasonsTM): 

Pseudo LoZ and Fable crossover original hybrid thing (1) Hey Arnold! (1) World of Darkness - Vampire: The Masquerade (1)

In progress: After unofficially abandoning so many stories, I’ve stopped publishing any until the whole story is written and just needs one last polish. That was how I managed to get Peeping Tomcat done. That said, I have a couple of irons in the fire.

Main WIP: One and the Same Current WIP: Love Square Fluff Week 2020 (an exception to the “wait til it’s all written rule) Random On-going WIP: I Don’t Care (I never intended this to be an on-going story, but there you have it) “Backburner” WIPs:  > What Is Truly Meant To Be (A HA! story I unintentionally abandoned in 2013)  > X-Future: The Second Generation Begins (My recapping of the X-Future game)  > X-Future Snippets (Random one-shot stories in the X-Future universe)  > Please, Let Me Explain (The aforementioned X-Future collab)

Plunnies:   > When Love Matters (a retelling of the ML series if Gabriel actually was a loving father)  > A collab with @thetauruspixie to write a Fu-centric story telling of his travels through Europe with the Miracle Box and his love affair with Marianne

Do you take prompts? I’ll be honest, I struggle a touch with prompts, but I like challenging myself. One of the reasons I’m doing the gift exchanges. So, if you have a prompt idea, I’d love to hear it. See if it inspires me. :D

Upcoming project I’m most excited about: When Love Matters. I wanted to work on that between breaks, while I had time to backtrack before more episodes aired. Considering how long OatS is taking though, I might not get to start his project until about the time S4 starts. 9_9

Tagging but you are under no obligations to participate: @thetauruspixie, @cyhyr, @chibisunnie, @rikareena, @coffeecomicsgalore, @chanceuseladynoire, @zenmisery, @i-am-the-niece-of-satan (I know some of you are socially anxious, so again, you are under NO OBLIGATION to participate. I just figured people might be interested in knowing more about you)

Also, if you write and want to answer, assume I’m tagging you as well. I’d love to know more about your writing.

[aconstantstateofbladerunner]

MHA Fanfiction WIPs (Update 5)

Hey gang I’m gonna tell y’all ‘bout all my My Hero Academia fanfiction ideas instead of actually working on any of them let’s GO!!!

The Butterfly Continuity

- Butterfly - The big one.  My magnum opus.  Izuku is stalked by a mysterious villain that starts to make him doubt his own sanity.  Each new piece of the puzzle only brings up more questions.  The main one: why does it only seem to go after him?

22/30 chapters as I make this post.  Scene by scene outline complete.  Currently being written and published.  We’re in the home stretch.  Beware major character death.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17165612/chapters/40360787

- Distant Thunder - Takes place right after the events of Butterfly but I’d hesitate to call it a sequel.  Exists mainly to tie up a loose side plot the main story won’t cover.  Can’t give many details because spoilers.

11 chapters.  Outline complete.  There will be angst.

- Exit Light - A prequel story with young Toshinori and Nana.  A villain traps their town in all-consuming darkness.  “Consuming” in this case is literal. 

(Not directly tied to the events of Butterfly beyond a verbal mention.  Basically, I have this scene planned where Toshinori tells the basics of the story and I thought it might be fun to write the whole thing separately.)

7-8 chapters.  Major events outlined.  Focuses on the developing familial dynamic between young Toshi, Nana, and Gran Torino.  Happy ending.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19233598/chapters/45733516

Bio Dad Might AU

- For Kurou - For their own safety, Toshinori must remove himself from the lives of his long-time partner and newborn son.  But they’re never far from his mind.  For years, not a day goes by where he doesn’t write a letter or set aside a gift for their eventual reunion.  It isn’t until he’s spent some time with his chosen successor, a young quirkless boy named Midoriya Izuku, that Toshinori’s consistent dedication to his family is interrupted.

23 chapters.  Major events and some scenes planned.  Canon divergence fic.  Streamlined to the important stuff because there are already an abundance of fics like this and I want to focus on my original stuff.  Toshinko.  Family angst with a happy ending.

- Told You So - Izuku hasn’t decided yet if he wants to go public with his heritage. On the one hand, he want to make a name for himself, not just as the son of All Might. On the other, he hates to lie and lying about One for All is hard enough. Most of the people who know the truth will support whatever decision he makes. Sir Nighteye isn’t one of them.

10+ chapters. Basic outline complete. Internship arc.

- Son Rise - Rumors have been circling of a secret All Might lovechild for a while now.  A new rumor says that All Might will reveal the child as his successor at the next International Heroes’ Summit in Hawaii.  The rest of the hero community has mixed feelings. 

Or, “Izuku goes to another country with his dad and has a bad time.”

11 chapters.  Major events outlined. Shameless excuse for me to gush about how cool Hawaii was while also hurting my boy.  Some Toshinko on the side.  Family angst with a happy ending.

Borrower AU

- Missing the Trees for the Forest - Toshinori was convinced his cottage was haunted from the day he moved in. He could easily blame the missing objects and little bites in his food on pests, but that wouldn’t explain the faint sound of crying some nights.

10+ chapters, partial outline. Gonna jump between angst and fluffy like a seesaw. Idea originally by @abyssal-glory who graciously gave me permission to use it.

Miscellaneous

- The Necromancer - Zombie apocalypse AU.  An unseen villain sets hoards of undead upon Japan.  As a designated disaster-relief shelter and a small fortress in its own right, UA becomes host to both the heroes working to stop the onslaught, and several hundred terrified civilians, including several students’ families.  Supplies and space shrink with each passing day, and it seems like the end to the nightmare is nowhere in sight.  Someone is bound to take matters into their own hands.

10+ chapters.  Some events planned.  Family drama and angst.  Not sure if there will be major character death yet.

- All But One - Toshinori is given the opportunity to undo over two decades of suffering by going back in time and ending All For One.  And that’s just the beginning.  He goes on to use his knowledge of the future to correct errors of the past, and makes his new reality infinitely better than the one he came from.  Better in every way but one.

Used to be a oneshot, not multi-chapter.  Outline complete and writing has started.  Open to making it an au but not sure yet.  Based on a bittersweet post by @skygemspeaks

6/? chapters up

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18796387/chapters/44597800

- Things that are His - Todoroki wasn’t allowed to have many personal belongings as a child. As a result, he tends to hoard what little he has, especially if it’s from a friend.

Oneshot about Todoroki being loved by his friends and loving them back. Kinda sad but not really.

- Spiked - There’s no such thing as a free meal.

Gore headcanon request that got out of hand into a oneshot.  Please read the tags.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20062174

- Angel’s Egg - Orphaned babies showing up on the stoop of hero agencies is unfortunately not all that rare.  And egg the size of a baby is entirely unheard of. Is the child within just the result of an unusual quirk, or something of far greater, supernatural origins?

Kinda out there au where Izuku hatches from an egg and is raised by All Might.  That question is posed to me, because I’m not yet sure if I want to go down the mundane or supernatural path; I have potential endings for both.

- Hanakotoba (working title) - Toshinori always wanted a family, but he wanted to be a hero even more.  He figured the family thing would happen naturally, but as the years go by and it doesn’t, he finds himself sinking further and further into longing.  And then he finds the end of his sorrows in his own garden.

Hybrid Thumbelina/Princess Kaguya au prompted by @agent-jaselin.  This one is for sure supernatural.

- Two Sons in the Sunset - One of the greatest crimes ever committed by Japan’s villain underground is hidden in plain sight.  Same goes for the crimes of one of its greatest heroes.  The results of both find they have a lot in common.

AU where Izuku is a test tube baby created by villains to defeat All Might, but ended up being adopted by him.  He and Todoroki later bond over similar baggage with their origins.  Whether or not it remains a bromance of full-on tododeku depends on if I can get over my own baggage of writing romance.

- The one where everyone finds out - Y’all been hounding me about making a fic where everybody finds out about Izuku’s past so this is here to tell you I’m working on it. Might be a fic of its own, might sprinkle an arc into one of the other aus.

- The Arena - Class 1-A gets transported to a pocket detention by some villains and have to fight whatever else is there.

No chapter estimate.  Mostly just have the concept and some scenes planned.

I’ll update this post as stuff comes out.  Please let me know what you think!

[thequietmanno1]

Thelreads, MHA 183, Replies Part 1

1)“Oh dear lord in heaven its the kids from 1-B waiting to get their asses sued. Oh lord, that reads like a cross-over fanfiction but I be damned if I wouldn’t be sitting on the front rows.”-Honestly I’m somewhat impressed and pleased that harry potter ended up being referenced in a mainstream Japanese manga- Romeo and Juliet is a Shakespeare work and thus pretty much ingrained into culture so deeply that it’s one of the first things you think of when you hear ‘shakespeare’, Star wars as a film franchise was pretty widespread and has had time to integrate into popular culture over the last 50 years, but harry potter’s first book was published only about 22 years ago and it’s still managed to become so popular that Horikoshi can stick a western shout-out in the midst of about 3 cross-referencing English-speaking shout-outs without fear of anybody not know what he’s going on about- it’s practically the opposite of most manga I’ve read when usually include Japanese or similar folktales or stories that they reference

2)“Oh no, that guy is the guy we all know… The “The book was better, they jammed everything on a single movie when they could’ve done 8 of them” guy… I know that guy… Me and my sister, we are that guy…”-I have to wonder if that guy was the Japanese equivalent of a weaboo- somebody who know and understood all the western references and different story points 1B crammed into their play because he’s read the original stories and got the translated hardback copies stored in his dorm room, and he’s aghast at how they butchered the originals and Frankensteined them back together into a mishmash of a story that somehow includes most of the original plot points and beats.

Sure, he’s impressed at the scale and ambition of it, but still… way too much content for a single play to cover without becoming ridiculous- I’m totally of the mind that Monoma thought he was creating a grand epic tale when he penned the script, only for the reality of the play to be that it was entertaining because of how nuts it was- which makes me wonder- if Monoma was indeed the script maker, does that means he’s a western aficionado as well? Or if not him, who else in class 1B would be such a nerdy fan of such classics?

3) “Ah, kinda sad that those kids couldn’t see the magnum opus that was… I don’t even know how to describe what class 1-B did.”- “a flustercuck of stories, themes and plots ripped, still-bleeding from the hearts of their donors and stitched back together into a creation that, contrary to its origins, does actually contain a coherent plot, apparently by going so far through the veil of madness that it circles back around and arrives at sense again.”

4) “Oh lord, that’s hysterical. He’s really angry at Midoriya for acting like that, and he didn’t even heard about the part where he fought a dangerous criminal on school grounds.”-Well, a hero’s supposed to be reliable and raise everybody’s spirits, so if Midoira was shirking the concert show because of his own personal issues when all his other classmates had put their hopes and dreams and hard work in, that wouldn’t be very becoming behaviour for a future no1 hero.

 Like All Might said back at Midoira’s training, hero work should be about community service first and foremost, with fighting rouge villains being an unfortunate side-effect they need to deal with on a daily basis, but still- a number one hero like Midoira’s aiming for needs to be somebody who can be relied upon to be there for you no matter what- thinking about it this entire situation is analogues to that opening scene in the Incredibles with Mr Incredible having to prioritise getting a cat out of a tree in favour of a car chase happening nearby- and unlike him and all Might, Midoria’s not yet managed to be strong or skilled enough to multi-task the different demands of being an on-the job hero for everybody in need in an immediate area- heck, vigilantes kinda had a chapter that lampooned this drawback with All Might having to MacGyver solutions to multiple incidents at the same time by using said incidents to solve each other, ala using the tree to stop the getaway car.

5) “Unfortunately, he has a point. It was too dangerous, he could’ve died. We know that he only did that for Eri, but she wouldn’t like to know that he put his life on danger for her, again.”-In a way, Midoria’s lucky that the criminal he fought was somebody like gentle, who may have been willing to beat him unconscious as a last resort, but generally used trickery, reflecting Midoria’s own attacks back at him via skilful usage of his quirk, one-the-fly traps like the falling beam to pin him down, or skilful chops to the back of his neck to render him unconscious in a single merciful move. Gentle may have been willing to go all-out once Midoria pushed him that far, but that was the last few minutes of the fight- before then he tried to minimise the damage he had to inflict upon Midoira when he could neither shake him off or pin him down long enough to escape, and generally didn’t try to hurt Midoria at all if he could have avoided it.

 If the villain had been somebody like Stain or Muscular, then Midoria would have been ‘really’ dumb to try and fight them alone with the option of backup available, even if he was trying to help heal Eri’s heart through the festival, but because he was fighting somebody who only took the kiddie gloves off as a last resort, especially once he’d failed to knock him out even with the power-up, Midoria wasn’t damaged enough  to be forced to keep out of the concept for his own well-being- I can see Recovery girl  just despairing over having to heal all his cuts and broken bones before he tries putting on a dance show, demanding he cover the bill for several bottles worth of gin  as payment

6) “That was… That was actually quite nice. It’s some progress to him. He was acknowledged as someone that can fight to protect the peace, but he shouldn’t be doing that alone yet.”-for all of Midoria’s lack of a visible hero profile in the public eye- beyond being known as a crazy lunatic who’ll fight you even as his body self-destructs- he has a talent for earning the respect and trust of the professional heroes who put their lives on the line as part of the job, understanding that he has the skills and judgement to be a truly great hero once he’s old enough to graduate, but until then, as professional heroes, it’s a little insulting that Deku continually tires to solve all the issues he comes across by himself, even if he does have altruistic reasons, because that’s ‘their’ job, and half the reason why they’re even on UA grounds in the first place, the other being to beat the lessons of hero work into their students heads, which has a bad habit of working too well with Midoria, what with his complex driving him to provide aid to others in need regardless of the cost to himself… actually, now I think about it, many of the lessons Midoira’s been learning so far revolve around him needing to be ‘less’ all sacrificing and noble, and to take better care of himself  even if it costs others in the process- Midoria’s still only a human being, and an under-age kid at that.

7) “Its nice that All Might appreciate the help on educating Midoriya. He sometimes doesn’t have all the right words to convey his teachings, and he at least is learning to rely on other teachers that are better at communicating than him.

And yes I did just say that hound dog is better at communicating than All Might.”-Said just seconds before Hound-dog devolves into animalistic gibberish again- but still, yeah, All Might’s main problems going forward revolve entirely about how to be a better ‘teacher’ than hero, and he’s not as well-versed in telling others how to do things, rather than showing them how to do it- an option denied to him thanks to his currently withered body. I liked this arc because the training session with Midoria showed how All Might’s adapting and taking his own strides in becoming a better mentor to Midoria- a fact aided by Midoria being the kind of student who rapidly understands lessons once he has his foot in the metaphorical door. All Might adapting to Midoria’s power levels and the tech support he’s getting from Mei shows how he’s aware of time passing him by as his students get stronger and more independent of him, and how he needs to keep up with them for as long as they need his guidance- and as long as it takes for Midoria to turn himself into the next no1 hero.

8) “MIDORIYA IS TRYING SO HARD TO KEEP HIMSELF TOGETHER, I CAN’T. IT WAS JUST WHAT HE FOUGHT FOR, TO SEE HER HAVING A BIT OF HAPPINESS AFTER SO MANY YEARS OF SUFFERING.

OH GOD I CAN’T, IT’S SO PURE AND ADORABLE”- “My nose has been broken and reset, I’ve got a ringing in my ears from the smacking gentle gave and Jiro’s volume-blasting sounds, I’ve possibly got a few bruises all over my abdomen and I think I strained my left arm muscles lifting up at girder…Worth it!”

9) “BAKUGO, STOP THAT SMUG SHIT-EATING GRIN RIGHT THIS MOMENT YOUNG MAN, YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED THAT SORT OF EXPRESSION. YOU KNOW THAT YOU CAN ONLY GLARE AND MAKE A MURDER FACE.

And funnily enough, kirishima is also celebrating their victory, but not on a “we’re better than them” kind of way, but on a “we touched their hearts and they aren’t as hostile as they once were to us” way.”-Different goals, same actions taken to achieve those goals= similar, but characteristically distinct reactions towards their success- though frankly, shit-eating grin seems to be the closest Bakugou can get to showing a tender smile between his blood-lust faces and battle-ready smirking

10) “Still, even if those people couldn’t be there to see the show, the people that did will be sure to transmit the feelings, and soon, maybe the school will actually come together eventually.”-Makes me wonder how many people are actually in the school- we know there’s about 3 different courses between support, business and the hero course, but that hall was packed pretty full, so there can’t have been many students who weren’t able to get a glimpse of it in some form or another, but from iida’s dialogue and the number of stalls around, it seems like there was still about half the student body that didn’t get to see how rocking 1A is. @thelreads

[porchwood]

Hi just so I understand cause i keep waiting for it and it doesnt seem likely to happen have you kind of fallen out of love with wtm? and everlark in general tbh? cause ive been following you for a while now and you always had lil quotes and pictures and things that reminded you inspired you whatever it was about katniss and wtm and now alllll it is is gadge i followed you because personally i love what you did with everlark and im just wondering if thats gone and not foreseeable any time soon?

I’ve been thinking a lot about how to answer this… It’s afair question - to a point. If you’re more of a drop-in person (like me) thanlive-on-the-dash, coming back to find my blog awash in Gadge might have beenquite upsetting. There are several reasons for the current state of things:

1. Life has been driving me into the ground since December26, 2013. (Yes, going on six straight years.) If you were a WtM reader from thebeginning, you may recall that I was pretty energetic and prolific in 2012-2013.Oh, there were tough times, but nothing like what started on the aforementioneddate (a car accident where I was in the “bystander” vehicle and it still got totaled)and has continued relentlessly ever since. Sometimes adversity leads to greatcreativity and sometimes it turns you into a depressed, exhausted, reclusivelump, and the past 5+ years have seen periods of both from me. These past 18months have been exceptionally awful (and expensive), resulting in very littlewriting at all, about any pairing.

2. Writing WtM takes a lot out of me. I don’t know whether thisis common knowledge or not, but it’s the gospel truth. I love that world, Ilove that version of Everlark, but every chapter requires so much hard work, itmakes me tired just to think of it. Not to mention, over the past couple of chaptersEverlark have been pushing for more intimacy than the plot/timeline allows, andso I’ve been struggling with how I want to handle that. Do I fight them andstick to the plan? (I can’t advance the timeline for several reasons.) Do I tryto figure out a cheat for them? They’ve got minds of their own and have changedmy plans multiple times, but this is something they genuinely can’t have, and Ihave to fight them on it. ☹ Which is sad, frustrating, and exhausting.

3. I’m a multi-pairing shipper, and have been from about 3chapters into WtM. Which means that my Everlark fics almost always feature asecondary pairing (or more than one), and sometimes I’ll get a plot bunny for afic about a pairing other than Everlark. Most writers in the THG fandom exclusivelywrite their OTP, whatever the plot bunny, but I find that some plot bunnies don’tfit Everlark as well as they do another pairing. (This is why I’ll never write aBeauty and the Beast Everlark fic unless Katniss is the “Beast,” if you will.)

4. The Everlark fandom is…tricky. I’ve never fit in there. Idon’t write Everlark the way the majority of fans see them (except for Peetabeing “sweet,” I guess), I hated the movies (I refuse to see MJ 1 or 2), and I’vemanaged to really rub some people the wrong way over the years –unintentionally, and for a variety of reasons – all of which leaves me feeling kinda down about Everlark in general. Don’t misunderstand me: I love Everlarkand WtM, but it’s really isolating to be this sad little island of unpopularopinions and unwelcome side-ships. That’s the part I really wish I could makeyou understand. For six years I’ve had Christopher Plummer in my head saying, “You’llnever be one of them,” and he’s so, cruelly, right. I want to cry every time Ithink of Embracing the Season (my E-rated Everlark modern AU oneshot for Lovein Panem - lots of daring for me!) because I poured heart and soul into that andit still wasn’t the Everlark that people wanted.

5. About a year and a half ago (when Strawberry Time reallytook off of its own accord) I participated in Gadge Day 2017, working my buttoff to find and schedule (and tag) over 100 carefully chosen Gale/Madge/Gadge aestheticposts, and for lack of a better way to say it: it turned on my Gadge-dar. After that, thosekinds of posts just leapt out at me whenever I had a chance to scroll, and forseveral months I wasn’t sure what to do with that. With a little encouragementfrom @ghtlovesthg, I came up with #march madgeness – wherein I turned my Tumblrinto Madge/Gadge-land for one month, and it was a blast. (Side-stepping Gadgefor a moment: Madge is a highly underappreciated and underused character,especially in fic/on Tumblr and I love splashing the dash with Madge-love.) Thenext month I launched a run of pent-up Everlark posts (i.e., regularprogramming), but I missed my Madge, so I instituted #madge monday – one day aweek when I could splash the dash with Madge/Gadge. At every juncture I gavepeople tags to block if they didn’t want to see this content (though I stillget unfollows every time I post, alas). I participated in last summer’s THG Reread– on the fringe of it, but my posts (reblogs and meta) were strongly Everlark-focusedagain during that time. So there’s definitely still been Everlark on my blog,but if you’re just dropping in (or for that matter, glancing at my archive), you’regoing to see a majority of Madge/Gadge.

6. Frankly, Gadge is fun. It’s a completely different dynamicthan Everlark, with less pressure to create something transcendent, and whenthe chips are down, I’m more likely to work on something that isn’t my six-years-runningopus. This spring, in the midst of lots of awfulness, I finally wrote a piecethat I’ve had in my head for years – The Best Part of Waking Up – with a differentpairing featured in each drabble “chapter,” including Gadge, Luka/Johanna (whoI’ve been wanting to put out there for AGES) and Jack/Raisa. I haven’t beenable to write quickly in years, and I think I finished those three “chapters”in about two days, maybe three. I completed the Raisa drabble in a couple ofhours and I consider it one of the best things I’ve ever written. (Honestly, ifa pairing was going to topple Everlark in my heart, it would be Jack/Raisa, i.e.,Mr. Everdeen/Mrs. Mellark. I love them to distraction.) Once upon a time I could drabble/sprint Everlark too – notoften, but I could manage it. Maybe it’ll happen again someday, but for thetime being, when I write in quick eager bursts, it’s usually about aside-pairing.

7. Because I just need to say it: about a year ago, I set up a secondary Tumblr for almost all my side-interests and ships outside of THG. When I first joined Tumblr, porchwood was just a fun page where I posted whatever struck my fancy (pretty things, funny things, whatever I liked), and over the next few years, I honed it into a pretty “writer’s notebook” for WtM and my other THG fics (related quotes, aesthetic posts, writing check-ins, etc.). When Star Wars: The Force Awakens came out, I shared a handful of posts pertaining to a new ship (not a new direction for my blog or writing, just sharing my excitement) and it was made very clear to me that people didn’t want to see that content on my page. So when I started watching Voltron: Legendary Defender, I had a sneaking suspicion people wouldn’t want to hear about those ships either. So I started an entirely new Tumblr for that content, and every so often I accidentally post something to the wrong page, which I immediately correct in horror, but people still unfollow. Point being: this blog is THG (and a few personal life updates) ONLY, with a pretty consistent aesthetic. I hide literally everything else that I’m interested in so you don’t have to be bothered by it. Is it really so unacceptable for me to have side-ships (complementary to the main pairing, not threatening to them) in the same universe??

8. Believe it or not, I’ve been working on WtM all along,just not making any massive strides. I tried to chip away at the current chapterduring Camp Nanowrimo last July, and it was a disaster. I thought joining awriting group would be helpful, but I didn’t realize that Camp Nano is basicallya lot of writing sprints in which you try to churn out as many words aspossible, which you then report to your “cabin” – and that’s the onlyinteraction with your fellow writers. I can’t write like that anymore (seeabove) and especially not when it comes to WtM, so I got discouraged veryquickly and sort of drifted away. I reattempted Nano on my own in April and wrotealmost 15K words, but in that instance I was really just using the Nano platform toset and reach a goal (which I didn’t ☹ ); I wasn’t in a cabin and didn’t interact with anyother writers, except my friend @ghtlovesthg, who read the finished portion.

9. I want to finish this dang chapter so much, and frankly, theonly way that’s going to happen is if life gets a little better and I holemyself up with my laptop for hours on end for weeks at a time – and somemagical being comes to support/cheer/comfort me while I do so. It’s currentlysitting at about 25K and I anticipate it will need to be at least double that,which is beyond ridiculous, but that’s the nature of WtM. The chapters are asmany words as it takes.

TL, DR: I still love Everlark and I’m still working on WtM, but my life has been extremely difficult for a very long time and I don’t have a great Everlark lifeline. Gadge and all my other ships are fun, and most of the Gadge you see on my Tumblr is aesthetic stuff for themed days/months/occasions. Anything non-THG goes on my sideblog.