#because they know s wants us to have lots of attachment figures and support and thats real care

[silentalltheseyearsnomore]

Ehhhh session went okay with S I think. Better than what I dreaded, which was her having her wall up still and not being able to reach her and it staying like that until we end in a matter of weeks. But she was still her. I didn't get to confront her about what happened and the things we know aren't okay. But we did connect a little, talked a little about how to use these sessions, she said she wants to still be around to help after we end, wants to help us get the right therapy etc, but she is just being very careful knowing our history with therapists and she wants it to be healthy and different and okay for us both. Which we appreciate obviously even if the unknown is terrifying. Talked about the referral for specialist therapy, she is still trying to make that happen for us. But we likely will have no therapy for a while. It is not what either of us planned for but I am glad she is navigating it the best way possible to make sure circumstances dont implode our relationship. We both agreed none of this is about me, her, or our relationship, but simply circumstances and we both want that not to ruin what we built. And to do that she needs to know her limits and hold them and we need less pressure on our relationship. I mean even just the fact we don't live in a safe environment yet again makes therapy almost impossible. It's not her fault or our fault. It just is. And I'm proud of our system for managing any of it tbh, considering the extent of triggers, I am proud of us for talking about any of it, for even trying, even being alive honestly.

The most helpful bit was her talking about trust. And reenactments. And being in the present. I don't remember it as it was a mush of child parts but I do remember the sense of 💡 moments they had, and a sense of the trust being directed back inwards and in to the present rather than more outwards and in to the future. They panic so much about the future, about who still stay, what will happen, things no one can know. And something clicked today where they realised that it is them that is always questioning, not her. She just trusts. And that their constant questioning can actually make others start questioning things they're sure about in the relationship or elsewhere, and end in self fulfilling circles. So our aim is to just hold on to the transitional thing of hers that represents this trust, and try and forget all the noise and questions. She said it represents her trust in us too, it shows she believes we are worthy of this trust, and that we never see it that way around. She said we often torture ourselves with things we feel she must feel when she doesn't at all. So. Trust. Trust that even though every part of our life is in limbo and scary that each day we face what we can and then the next and things will change. Trust that right in this moment she is there, still wants to get us the right help, still wants to be around. Trust that we can still get better and have a future. Trust that things will work out and that questioning actually has the opposite effect of what we want. Trust in how people feel and their actions rather than questioning. (We can tell when someone cares deep down, we just don't believe it.) Trust in ourselves that we are trusting for good reason. Trust just today and the next day and that we will face the end of therapy when it comes and then the next thing. Jeeeeeeze. Change is hard. Trusting in the present moment is hard. I feel relieved and scared and brave and shaky all at once.

[thisthatpinkvenom]

IT'S SWEATPANTS SEASON, OH MY!

JOCK!SAN / BAND GEEK!FEM READER

⤏ Synopsis: Autumn has arrived; the season of pumpkin spice lattes, corn and—unfortunately for you—grey sweatpants. those pesky little things have attached themselves to your boyfriend's legs like glue, and you're having a hard time keeping your mind out of the gutter.

⤏ Genre(s): drabble*, fluff, humor(??), smut, smut, smut

⤏ Content: jock!San, band geek!fem reader (I know, I'm so original), you're referred to as "sweet potato" once—don't ask, just go with it, established relationship!au, college!au, non-idol!au

⤏ NSFW Warning(s): dry humping, unprotected piv (it's fiction, guysss. use your rubbers and stay safe!), creampie, just lots of build up because I'm down bad for a man in grey sweatpants 🙈

⤏ Note*: this content is completely fictional.

The mosaic of orange and yellow was striking below the dull blue clouds as the trees continued to shed their leaves. Your eyes swayed with the leaf you'd been watching descend its way patiently to the ground while you sat on the bench, shoulders jittering in the midst of the decreasing temperature. Your hands peeked out from the ends of your sleeves before rubbing together, the crisp morning air making your fingers tingle in the cold. You should've worn a thicker jacket, is what you mulled over in your head that you hadn't even noticed San until he enveloped his own padded jacket over you. The gust of warmth awoke you from your reverie and you hummed, meeting eyes with him when he lowered himself into a squat.

"You didn't have to come here," he said, a dimple indenting his cheek as he curled one corner of his mouth upward. After pulling the hood over your head, he tenderly brushed his thumb across your cheek. "I know you're not a morning person."

You struggled to fight a yawn until you decidedly gave in, white fog manifesting in your breath.

"I want to support you," you murmured. You were too busy blinking away your fatigue to notice how he looked on in nothing but fondness. Your conscience warped your thoughts when you scanned over the jacket engulfing your frame, your lips forming into a small pout. "Mm…aren't you going to be cold?"

San took a glance at his attire; he's only got a windbreaker left to keep him warm. Nonetheless, he shook his head and insisted he was used to practicing like this on the field. Despite wearing less than you and the flushed red on his nose and cheeks, you couldn't really tell if he felt the effect of the weather as much as you did. You couldn't fathom how he had the motivation to get up at the ass crack of dawn to run around with a ball, doing drills with his teammates while Coach Kim rapid-fired pointer after pointer without a stop to catch his breath. It truly was admirable how smiley he was at 7:00 a.m. without consuming any caffeine.

Coach Kim sauntered along the grass before he blew his whistle and commanded the team to group together. Your boyfriend looked over his shoulder before turning back to you, eyes squinting as the sun's orange glow began to blanket over the field.

"Well, gotta start soon," he observed. "Stay warm and if you're sleepy, just go back. I'm happy you're here but don't force yourself to stay. All right, Sweet Potato?"

You made a small noise of confirmation, unfazed by the odd affectionate nickname you had gotten used to over time. The heat of his palms skimmed over your ears as he pressed a gentle kiss on your forehead before standing tall. But what you didn't anticipate—whoa—had really slapped you awake right then and there. For the mere five seconds you'd managed to capture a mental image, time felt as if it'd been stretched to hell when your boyfriend's crotch had leveled with your eyes. You hadn't realized the grey sweatpants hanging low on his hips and now that you've gotten a face full of…that, you're acutely aware.

You're shook to the core.

Your gaze trailed after his jogging figure, following the path up his long and toned legs to his cute little bu—okay, whoa! It's only 7:15 in the morning. You had no business indulging in these thoughts right now. Get it together.

Oh, he's facing your general direction now.

Are you staring at it too much? It's starting to feel a little warm, all of a sudden; it's the jacket, isn't it? Just how long is this going to take?

You're trapped on this bench. It hadn't even been 10 minutes since practice started and Coach Kim was rambling on about the importance of warming up while you're glued to your seat, pathetically staring at your boyfriend's dickprint while he seemingly had no idea. God, you felt like a perv. Even though he assured you that it was okay, you didn't want to just up and leave. This was a relationship built on give and take, and there were one too many times when he watched your concerts while knowing little to nothing about orchestral music.

You'll just suffer, then.

"Just fuck him."

"Lisa!" you chided, pushing three fingers against your friend's arm as she rolled her eyes.

"What?" She swirled her tongue around the glob of chocolate ice cream sitting on top of her waffle cone. "He's a hot, charming guy. Your own boyfriend makes you horny and that's supposed to be a problem now?"

"Oh, my gosh, I just…" you trailed off, eyes searching elsewhere for your thoughts. "I'm not used to being all"—you waved your hands disorientedly in front of you—"dirty…minded. He's the one who usually initiates it."

"Sex?"

"Everything physical, really," you clarified. "I just feel like if I start it, it's just going to be off—and awkward."

You sighed. "How am I going to get through this season?"

"Oh, yeah, the sweatpants; that's what's been making you a sex freak," Lisa recalled with an airy laugh. "Those things are like lingerie for guys. Especially the grey ones…oomf. 'Dicktoria's Secret' is real," she snorted.

You gave her a blank stare.

"Look, just be honest," she said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world—which it was. "You really think any guy is gonna find it offensive that his girl's drooling over his bulge?"

"I wasn't drooling—"

"You will be."

"Oh, my gosh."

You weren't aware that having a footballer-boyfriend automatically signed you up for three months' worth of almost nothing but sweatpants. You also didn't know how many he had stashed in his wardrobe until now—it's good to know he didn't wear the same pair everyday. But this meant he had enough pairs to flaunt his dick outline in your face whenever you were together.

Not good for your cavewoman brain.

Fingers danced along your neck and you squirmed at the intrusion, meeting eyes with San's own with your face sporting a frown. The same fingers belonged to the arm lazing comfortably around your shoulders, both of you having snuggled together into mush on his couch while you binge-watched one of your favorite shows. You whined his name in annoyance when you're kicked out of your thoughts.

He chortled. "Sorry, I just—it's Buffy and you don't even seem that into it. Is everything okay?"

Let's see: it's a Friday night. His roommate, Mingi went to visit his parents for the weekend and you're all alone with your hot, charming boyfriend™ who's clearly gone commando under his sweats. And you're supposed to be watching Buffy slay vampires…how?

"Y-Yeah, why wouldn't it be?" you stammered.

He hummed in feigned ponder, and the knowing smirk surging its way onto his lips would've sent a churn in your belly if you'd actually caught sight of it.

"You know that my eyes are up here, right?"

Your eyes snapped up in panic, and silence was the only response you had sitting on your tongue. You wanted to hide in a cave, where you could wallow in embarrassment without disturbance. Your own boyfriend had just caught you ogling his crotch like a perv.

San tucked his bottom lip between his teeth, suppressing a smile at how you resembled a deer in headlights. "You thought I wouldn't notice?"

Your mouth was stuck in a battle between opening and closing as you desperately searched for the right words. With a defeated sigh, your face fell into the safety of your palms.

"This is so embarrassing," you groaned, words muffled against your hands.

"Hey," he laughed softly, grabbing your wrists in an attempt to retract your hands away from your face. "It's not a big deal"—you sighed when the light from the standing lamp washed into your eyes—"it's cute."

You gave him a funny look. "Cute," you stated, doubt laced in your tone.

"Yeah. Usually, I'm the one doing all the staring."

He scanned you up and down with a pondering pout on his lips, continuing on to ask, "It's the sweatpants, isn't it?"

"Do you have to state the obvious?" you whined.

"What? I just wanna make things clear, so I know what to wear for you," he teased. He shifted closer and smoothed a hand up your thigh. "I'll wear more for you."

If he felt the goosebumps on your skin, he didn't comment on them.

"You say it like it's lingerie," you quipped, recalling what Lisa said a few days ago. You're saying anything to distract yourself right now, but you crumbled easily whenever he touched you. And he knew it well, especially when his hand moved dangerously close to your pyjama shorts. You're not even sure if you were breathing.

"If it's gotten you like this, then I'd say it pretty much is."

He moved on to say, "I like it when you look at me like that."

Your expression was frozen. "Like what?"

San's eyes changed ever so slightly, his hand finally slipping between your squeezed thighs.

"Like you really want me."

Your thighs parted for him. "I…I do," you murmured.

"Oh, really? Where do you want me?"

"Where else?"

"I asked you first."

You made a quiet huff from your nose, looking down at his hand that's aching to pull your shorts down. "Inside"—you hesitated—"inside me. I-I would like it if we had sex…please?"

His lustful gaze turned softer, eyebrows raised high at your interesting way of words. While you, on the other hand, visibly grimaced. San found your eyes shutting tight and your nose scrunching up all too adorable, and without a doubt, he would've bitten your cheeks if he could.

With a chuffed smile, he hooked his fingers at the waistbands of your shorts and underwear, waiting for you to lift your hips. "Well, what are we waiting for? Let's have the sex now."

You sulked at his incessant teasing, knowing well enough that he was purposefully expressing his words awkwardly. He laughed and assured you he would stop there, before grabbing your now half-naked body by the hips and having you straddle him. His fleece sweatpants were rough from the continuous use, giving you some nice sense of friction on your sensitive nub.

But above all that, you could feel the presence of his cock hiding beneath his pants, your pussy lips spreading the slightest on his erection. Your breath hitched as his hands made their way under your sweater, then your shirt; reposed comfortably at your hips as if they made home there. The pads of his fingers kneaded your skin as he looked up at you with expectant eyes.

"C'mon, get yourself off for me."

You waited with bated breath for nothing in particular—you'd just been momentarily distracted by his intense stare. Nodding too many times in the span of a second, you began to move your hips under the guide of his hands.

"Oh…"

There was a minor ache in your hips when he dug his fingers deeper in your skin, but you were too focused on the soft chafing of the fabric against your clit. It was getting you in the right place; so rough.

"Are you doing okay, Baby?"

You released an unstable sigh. "Y-Yeah."

He eyed the way your skin slightly folded with every move you made on his clothed cock, teeth pulling at his bottom lip. Your motions grew faster and more impatient as you yearned for his mouth against yours, falling forward before your lips touched his.

He pushed you down each time he pulled you forward, earning growingly unsteady breaths from you into his mouth. You nearly choked when he bucked his hips upward, soft moans having no chance to escape when each were engulfed by his lips. You continued to do nothing but mindlessly grind your clit on him, humping his clothed cock like you were in desperate heat.

You didn't have the mind to warn him at this moment, unable to hear anything but your own moans until you were reaching your impending climax. And soon with trembling thighs, you came. Your skin grew rampant with shivers while your mind went elsewhere for the bite of a second.

San finally spared some mercy, separating from you with a thin string of spit connecting your lips before he's splitting it with a lick from his tongue. Stealing a glance at the dark spot you left on his pants, he served you a lustful, lopsided smile.

"This is what you'll get if you're just a little more honest with me," he chuckled.

Your ears grew hot at the sight of your arousal leaving its mark, adjusting yourself with your hands on the backrest behind him. You waited a few beats to gather your words before you muttered, "Well…can I be honest with you right now?"

"Of course."

San waited with patient eyes, his stare nearly melting you into goo while he thumbed your skin again.

"I'd like to have the sex—with your penis inside me…please."

He didn't try at all to suppress amusement at how you'd poked fun at yourself, hearty laughter producing from the pit of his belly. The dimples in his cheeks emerged from hiding as he grinned and nodded while pushing his waistband down, just enough for his cock to free itself. When his laughter had settled, he pressed a peck on the tip of your nose.

"Whenever you're ready."

You grabbed the base of his cock and pressed the tip against your entrance, pausing for a moment until you began to slowly but surely, sink entirely down his length. The stretch always started as an odd pressure between your walls, but once they'd completely swallowed his dick whole, it always left you wanting more. It's a feeling you don't think you could ever give justice to, if you were ever asked to describe it. He was just so right for you.

Your body gave into him as he pulled you flush against his chest, his arms wrapping around your waist like a tightened belt. His hushed groans were made only for you, and hearing them continuously by your ear sent shivers down your spine.

"So warm," he muttered under his breath. He slid his bum further down the couch with you in his grasp and spread his legs wider. And when he was sure of the angle, he rolled his hips to meet yours, finding a steady pace with the most agonizingly unyielding thrusts. With every slam of his hips, your moans rendered into off-key whimpers as you melted under his guidance.

It felt like you were experiencing the hottest temperatures of the summer; your cheeks were burning and at moments, you felt like pushing away just from the sheer heat of your bodies entangled together.

A cuss left your boyfriend's lips when you gnawed on his shoulder, the salty tang of sweat grazing your tongue. And as if he wasn't holding onto you tightly already, he pulled you even closer as his cock rammed relentlessly, his rhythm growing sloppy when he began reaching his peak.

Your back felt like it'd been bent beyond repair as his cum coated your walls, the familiar twitching of his cock presented inside you. But he didn't stop there, he wouldn't until you came as well. And with his jaw clenched, he fucked into you like you were his toy, white rings of his own orgasm spilling with every move and making way to stain his pants.

"C'mon, Baby," he grunted. "Cum, f-fuck—cum, fucking c-cum…"

And in a few more thrusts, all you saw were specks of white among darkness. Your pussy spared no consideration on his sensitive cock and clenched as you trembled, the string of swears leaving his lips going deaf on your ears. Your limbs fell limp to pure exhaustion, despite how much you wanted to just wrap them around him like you were a koala and he was the tree. You wanted to mark your kisses all over his face but not even your lips were functioning right now as you barely managed to muster out a "thank you".

It was clear that it took a moment for San to register what you'd said, before he let out a breathy laugh. Not because he found something funny, it was just one of those laughs you got when you felt so euphoric—like getting your balls drained until you were a moaning mess; that kind of euphoric.

He kissed the top of your head, looking ahead at the TV where Buffy was still slaying vampires as usual. His dick stayed inside you, soft and relaxed in your warmth, neither of you in any rush to clean up.

"Mm…remind me to buy more of these sweats."

[intimidating-fettuccine]

Hi hi!! Can I request a (Any character/s of your choosing) with a young teen reader who died an eldritch being?

I just wanted some comforting dad content

Slender:

While you're not the first teen he's brought into the mansion, you are the first that's become an eldritch being. Slender's father had died and become an eldritch, and so Slender is familiar with the process and the fact that you'd dealt with great, unimaginable suffering in your human life for you to have become an eldritch. Slender does his best to care for you, welcoming you into the mansion and providing you with everything you might need. He also makes sure to get you into a form of therapy (whether with him or with a therapist he trusts and respects) because he knows you have a lot of trauma to unpack. He does his best to let you know you have a home and a safe family now, introducing you to the others, taking an interest in you and your hobbies and likes, and making sure you feel loved and supported. He has an open-door policy, and he encourages you to seek him or any of the others out should you need someone to talk to. He also does his best to try and help you figure out any powers and abilities you might have and how to use them, although if he struggles he'll take you to his mother for extra guidance, as she's better at these things than he is. He makes sure to work it into you that powers such as these are not to be taken for granted, and for you to use them safely and only for good reason. Slender promises to both you and himself that he'll do his absolute best for you, to give you a better life and to help you recover from the scars of your last one. With everyone around you, supporting you and helping you relax, it's not too long before Slender sees energy returning to you, excitement as you run around with the members of the mansion, and it makes him so unbelievably happy to have been able to give something like this to you.

Zalgo:

New eldritch beings are rare, and as the king of the Underworld one of Zalgo's responsibilities is identifying them and their abilities, and that's what he does with you, intending to leave you alone to try and survive just like everyone else, but... He can't bring himself to do it, no matter how firmly he insisted to himself that he would. You're just so young and scared, fearful and timid, not at all fit to be surviving on your own as such a competitively violent species that eldritch beings can be, so, he caves and takes you in. He has no clue what he's doing, after all his own upbringing was rather unorthodox and cruel, so he struggles in the beginning to figure out how to effectively parent and assist someone like you. He does have his staff help out, having them help you settle in, having them make sure you're eating and staying hydrated. I think like Slender he would try to get you a therapist in the Underworld, probably the best one money can get, and he (quite clumsily) tries to socialize with you and make sure you know that you can count on him and ask him or any of his staff for help if you need it. He's much more equipped to help you learn to control your powers than Slender is, and he spends a bit of time before you both go to bed every night helping you practice how to use them, and he always goes at your own pace, never forcing you and never getting upset if you fail. Eventually, the two of you settle into a rhythm, and you begin to seem much more at peace than when you first arrived, and Zalgo continuously finds himself surprised at how much his parental instincts seem to be growing. He feels glad that he had rescued you, as with how attached to you he's become, he couldn't imagine throwing you out to the wolves like that now. No, you belong at his castle. At home. 

[cherphadetseuk]

Things I want to see in Only Friends but one episode is by far not enough for any of that.

SandRay: I want to see Ray in rehab, I want to see how he struggles, how he relapses because so far it all looks like he's just fine going and nothing bad will happen. I want Sand to be by his side through his struggles and I wanna SEE it. Not just hear it or get a time skip being like...oh yeah, Ray went through his rehab and now is living happily ever after with Sand in his mansion and they're flying around the globe to see all the musicians. Okay bye that's it for Only Friends. Thank you for sticking with us through 12 painful, short episodes. No. I wanna SEE all of that. There either has to be a Season 2 or a SandRay spin-off, I don't care. I want it. Give it to me. All their scenes give me life and I know I’m extremely biased towards them but I can’t help it. They’re just so cute and as a Sand stan I just want him to be happy and appreciated and if Ray is that person than I’m 100% here for it. Given Ray had many eye-openers as well he will be that person. They’re good for each other and I am happy if they get that happy ending.

Sand and his dad: I want Sand to talk to his dad because I am 100% pretty damn sure he had the intention to say something after they talked for that short time in that episode before Ray interrupted for that heartwrenching short scene of them hugging. I wanna see more of his dad in general because they've been building up to this because why talk so much about him and show several scenes of Sand being at that club to see him perform when nothing comes of it. I wanna know who his dad is, I wanna know why the parents aren't together anymore. I wanna know more background on all of Sand's upbringing. Which brings me to his mum...I just want more of her. Period. I love her. That scene with her and Ray was everything. She's such a stable figure in Sand's life, guiding him while he supports her and now she's even guiding Ray because she's a mum and she knows her son and she knows about them and knows they're good for each other. I like supportive parental figures.

BostonNick: Same as with SandRay I wanna see the developement of their relationship. Nick didn't actually say yes officially to Boston's proposal of them being boyfriends until he leaves for NY. Nick also giving Boston a reality check with what he said to Atom about “don’t get attached to assholes”. He was literally calling Boston out at the same time which given Boston’s reaction, he knew it as well. Boston had a lot of eye-opening moments in the past 2 episodes so I hope they can make it work somehow. Whether Nick says yes or no, we’ll see. However, if he does I want them to like get attached and I want to see them develop the relationship. I want Boston to go to NY and them missing each other and Nick to be thinking about following Boston. I know, cliché, but I could totally see that. But I don't want him to just drop everything and follow Boston blindly. I want them to communicate and for Nick to say that he will finish his internship or whatever he does, to think about himself as well, and then maybe follow Boston later to pursue a career in NY because he'd be doing well in the US with animation. New York, the city of unlimited opportunities, he could do it. But I want them to have that long distance relationship first, to struggle, to communicate, to make it natural and not just bam here we go, two years later, Nick and Boston are happy living in NY together in a fancy flat. Again, BostonNick spin-off or Season 2. Thank you very much. I realised that BostonNick and SandRay are literally the same. Nick and Sand both being pushed around and dropped and used and all that and Boston and Ray both realising at the same time what they have of their other, how there's literally only one person who cares about them and none of them are from the friends group but I'm not gonna go there because that friends group is non-existent in my eyes. Except of Nick and Sand there was no actual friendship going on there that was even remotely healthy or supportive. Which brings me to:

Nick & Sand: I wanted more of this friendship. I wanted to see more how they live together after everything that happened. Mental breakdowns from their boyfriends/FWB relationships, them hanging out, talking, supporting each other. I just wanted more of this because again, healthiest friendship. They are roommates after all but we never actually SEEN them living together except of that one scene where Sand apologised for giving that audio to Ray. That was the only roommate scene we got in all of this and I felt like they would have been good for bonding over mutual shite they went through. I just wanted more of this friendship. They have like the most limited scenes together for the fact that they are both main characters. If Nick was just a random roommate it would have been different but he wasn't just random. They were both outsiders having been brought in into this mess from the outside. TopMew: Now, this is my problem couple. I don't dislike them. I'm actually a Top lover. I have never disliked him. I disliked some of his actions obviously but I never hated him like 99% of the people did. However, I'm happy Top gets a second chance. Deserved or not that's to debate because some people don't think so others do (like me) but that aside, I actually liked Top calling out Mew for the behaviour. Mew seemed to be unforgiving, which he also mentioned, but he's here giving Top a second chance, saying he's still in love with him but his facial expressions don't show it the same while Top is there struggling with his emotions and crying over the mistakes he has made. I want to see them working through those issues. Again, I just wanna see the development after everything that has happened. How they maybe go back to the way they used to be or maybe not, who knows. But one episode is not enough for that. Also we get the preview for the finale episode with the fire. Which brings me to:

Top: I feel like out of all the characters we know the least about him. All the other main characters have their dreams and their past and their struggles and we actually get to see and hear it. We don't know Top's dreams for the future. Where he wants to be, what he wants to do. We barely touched on his trauma, his ptsd (I think that's what he has, I forgot). We know his trauma is fire. We had that one flashback, we had the break-up scene where Mew lights the drawing on fire (which bold move, given he knows Top has a trauma with fire) but Top's reaction, I was not sure if it's just the break-up or actual fear because he was very expressive in that scene. However, we never see Top struggle with his PTSD, which his sleep problems, we hear about things but we never really touch on it. I want more of his story, want to know more about his past, his struggles. We also don't hear anything about his drug usage and everything. We had the halloween party and we still don't really know what happened between him and that police officer and him using drugs in general. Other than he's Mew's on and off boyfriend, we have no insight and it's kinda sad because I like him and I wanna know how all this came to be to begin with. Boston: I already talked about him in relation to Nick but I also wanna know more about his past because given how he acts towards his hookups and the fact that Nick would be his first boyfriend, he seems like to either have commitment issues, family problems or anything that made him shy away from falling in love and commitment. The way he both reacted to Nick and Atom in regard of them telling him they love him is like a defence mechanism. I feel like he’s in a similar situation with Yo. I love Boston but he has been stirring up a lot of shit in the first few episodes but he never actually came clean and apologised. He apologised to Nick for being an idiot but he never apologised for the dumb shit he spread around, the fact that he toyed with Nick and his friends and how he realised how everything went to shit AFTER Nick walked away and his friends. He got a slap in the face to make him realise but he never apologised for any of it to anyone.

YoPlug: In all honesty, the healthiest relationship we’ve seen in all of this show but then they just gone and put in some drama here too. Glad they resolved it and gone back. I want more of them. They were very small and a side ship, I get it. There’s not enough time in 12 episodes to develop 500 different relationships but I want more. I wanna SEE more of them. I want to see Yo move in with him, I want at least ONE scene of them outside of Y.O.L.O. I love them. I wish they’d get a spin-off. I wanna know how they got together, I wanna know more about Yo and her issues with past relationships. I just want more of them. Please and thank you. The mum’s: More mum’s please and thank you. Mew’s mums, I wanna know their story, I wanna know what they went through as a same-sex couple in their generation in Thailand. I wanna know how they got to become Mew. I just want more. More of Mew’s mum, more of Sand’s mum. In all honestly I would even love to know more about Ray’s mum, even tho that would just be dramatic and sad. I feel like Ray’s dad needs more screentime. He tries. I can see that. I don’t think he doesn’t care about Ray. He obviously does given he asked Sand for help because he knew he fucked up his relationship with Ray and Ray would not listen to him so he went behind his back to bribe Sand with money. It’s not necessarily a healthy move to bribe people with money who he knows need money and probably have the big chance to say yes and give in. We know how easy Sand was with giving in with Ray as well. As a broke human being, I get it. 100%. However, that doesn’t mean Ray’s dad doesn’t care. As I remember, Ray’s mum probably did what she did because her husband had no time for that relationship either. He didn’t become a workaholic after her death but we have to know that it had an immense impact on him as well. Psychologically. But he knew Ray was going the same route and he didn’t want to make the same mistake again but because shit has already gone too far in their father/son relationship he had to go with a different approach and that was Sand. The ONLY person who actually showed interest and care in Ray and his dad saw that and took it as an opportunity. I can’t honestly blame him. I don’t know if his and Ray’s relationship can be fixed but I’d love to see it as well. But again, we have ONE more episode. None of what I wrote here will happen in that ONE episode. Who am I forgetting. Oh of course. The MAIN thing I wanna know more about.

Sand/Top/Boeing: We know since episode 1 that Top apparently has stolen Sand’s Ex. Enter Boeing. Who also came out of nowhere so those characters never have good intentions. However, I wanna know HOW this all came to be. I am not sure if Boeing truly feels bad about dropping Sand. If he truly still have some sort of feelings for him and feels bad for what he did. Like Top. However, I am also not sure if it’s all a game as well. I can’t read him. He seems fishy. I don’t know if his intentions with Sand are truthful or if he’s just here to mess around. Kinda like Boston 2.0 from the first few episodes stirring up drama in all the ships. I DO however wanna know about their past and how Sand got to be with Boeing and how Boeing cheated on him with Top. Is Top really the bad guy here or was Boeing doing something to make it seem like Top was the bad guy. Was it truthful or not. We know nothing. We know he existed as a no-name for all those episodes but then he suddenly appears and we don’t know his intentions. In all honestly, dude should just go be the flight attendant he wants to be (which I still find hilarious given his name). I mean, dude is objectively hot. I wouldn’t mind being on an 11 hour flight with Thai Airlines and having someone like him bringing me my food. He’s an ass but he’s still eye candy haha. Sand better set him straight. At first I was like, WTF is Ray doing inviting him home but I think I get it. Honestly tho, I would love to see an even ground between Sand and Top given they have the same “enemy”. Given that TopMew seem to work it out and SandRay are working it out and RayMew seem to gone back to regular friends, they will still see of the other in some way or another. Which, oh, there is also another unsolved issue. Not issue since they DID talk but we literally got nothing around it:

RayMew: So apparently that happened, apparently it ended. They talked. They’re friends. We know Mew got with Ray because of his revenge plot. That whole Halloween party happened but nothing that happened at this party has been resolved in any way. Mew started smoking, taking drugs. It happened in the same breath as it ended. Atom: I’m gonna be completely honest, that scene with him and his sister was the biggest WTF scene of all of this show. Like, I understand it’s her brother and family is different. However, if MY sister pulled this shit I would have slapped her. Not in a “I hate you I will never see you again” way but in a “what the fuck were you thinking!!” way and I would have yelled at her for saying such bad stuff about someone else when it was a complete lie. We know Boston has been playing around and all but that was a horrible assumption to make and it could have gone a lot worse than it did. I would have made him go and apologise to Boston. However, now that BostonNick have set him straight, I would like to see him go out in the world and find himself with his eyes open to his new-found sexuality and get a good guy for him. Nobody from the friends group, nobody we know. Just himself and someone else in a healthy way. I would like to say the same about Dan. I know he likes Nick and I would be lying if I didn’t say they would be cute. However, we know Nick has different priorities so I guess Dan is gonna take the short stick. However, I like him and I hope Nick still gets the chance to be working with him and not drop him because of personal issues. Nick deserves the opportunity but at the same time I understand how not easy it would be to work with someone you like but doesn’t like you back like that. Tho Nick did seem to have some sort of feelings towards him. Let Dan have a happy ending to, with anyone. I think that’s it. I don’t know. I probably forgot a lot of things. So long story short! We need a Season 2!!!

[cozymoko]

Hello OP ヾ(๑╹◡╹)ﾉ" I was super excited to see someone writing for AkaYona in 2023, it was such a dead fandom last I checked two years ago. I was reading your rules and it seems you exclusively write for yanderes? But I’ve seen you write non-yandere content too. So if it’s okay…maybe a platonic reader and Yoon who sees Yoon as her child and is fiercely protective? Bonus points if it makes Yoon cry because he remembers when he lost his mother and is unused to having someone care for him since he’s usually the one caring for the group? Sorry if this offensive, I’m rereading the manga and have a lot of feels

Note: Hi hi hi! I do not exclusively write for yanderes but it seems like those type of posts get the most interaction. I'll be sure to go back and make it more specific.

I never really liked Yoon so this might be a little strange to read. I read the manga years ago.

Pairing: Yoon x (platonic) Mother-figure! reader

Format: Headcanons

WARNING(S): slight angst

LINKS: Akatsuki no Yona Masterlist

You were only a couple of years older than YOON; less than eight to be precise, and it took very little time for the two of you to grow close. After the unfortunate passing of his mother nonetheless, you became his main source of support from there forward. And although similar in numerous ways, you were also differe nt.

It was hard for him to adjust to the idea of someone caring for him as much as you did. You reminded him of his mother in so many ways, it was comforting, to say the least. Not that he would admit it. He didn’t want to come across as weak or soft in front of others as the thought left his ears a font shade of pink. But as he expected, you did not care one bit

At times he finds your nagging to be such a pain, which is quite hypocritical on his behalf. But he never verbally complains, he wouldn't dare. You cared for him, deeply, and you were never scared of showing it. He's grateful for you even if he doesn't express it too often.

But once he gets attached, it's over. The two of you are inseparable, nearly spending every waking moment together.

You found yourself fixing his hair every morning, brushing through it with the utmost care. You’d make breakfast solely for him as he always forgot about himself whilst tending to the others. Your actions were brimming with affection, so much so that he could feel it with every touch. It made his heart swell with a foreign warmth that he hoped would stay forever.

The idea of calling you mom or mother isn't all that strange to him, and at times it comes as second nature. You entered his life at a very young age thus, he thinks of you as nothing more than a second parent.

He's grown pretty reliant on you in little time, though he'd never admit it. When seeking comfort or solutions he'd look for you. When annoyed and at his wits end with Yona and her dragons, you're always there to lend a helping hand and he's not opposed to it.

You are as protective as you are kind and his friends learned that the hard way. If they wouldn’t listen to Yoon, they sure as hell listened to you (strange sentence).

Your glares were deadly like a snake staring through its prey. You did not attempt to hide your protectiveness, there was no use. Seeing you practically seeth when Hak even slightly raised his voice at the young boy sent you spiraling out.

YOON was more than capable of taking care of himself, you were aware, but the thought of leaving weighted you with ineffable grief. You didn’t want to, you would never. He’s been hurt enough and you knew that your absence would crush him into pieces.

Restless nights had become scarce for him thanks to you. You never left his side, leaving him something — someone to wake up to. Occasionally, the two of you would take amongst yourselves as YOON was gradually lulled to sleep by the steady beating of your heart.

“You don't have to pretend in front of me, know?” Your voice was soft as you gently pat his head, swaying to the whispers of the ocean touching the salty coast. “I'll always be here for you Yoon, no matter what.”

You sit on the edge of a sharp peak, its warm surface faintly grazing the cold skin beneath your legs. A faint smile captured your lips as you gaze to your side. Yoon watched you, eyes wide, fingers coiled into tight fists; but not out of rage, oh no, but happiness rather.

“D...don't say embarrassing things like that, of course, you'll be here! Where would you go anyways? Hmph, you said you wouldn't leave me so I expect you to keep your promises!”

[misccy27]

why I prefer Darius as Hunter's primary guardian (an unhinged rant)

(This post is riddled with disclaimers because the fandom has no chill about this subject lol)

So first of all I want to say, IRL at this point it would be Hunter's decision who he wants to live with. So I'm looking at this from a narrative perspective about what would be most satisfying to me as a viewer.

For the record, I think Darius, Camila, Eda, Raine, etc. can and should all be involved in Hunter's life in some form or another going forward. Hunter needs a strong support network and deserves all the caring parental figures he can get. But I also think that he needs stability. Even if he spends a lot of time at other houses, I think Hunter would do best with a place he can start to think of as his home, instead of cycling through a rotation of 'his room at Camila's house', 'his room at Darius' house', and so on.

Now. I know there were plans for Hunter to stay at the Owl House at some point in season 2, but since that didn't happen in canon, Hunter doesn't have any real foundation for moving in with Eda now. And we sadly never really get to see him interact with Raine. So that leaves us with 2 realistic candidates: Darius and Camila.

And just to head this off, yes Camila is a wonderful person. She would be a great parent for any child, including Hunter. I'm not saying that she wouldn't be, and I'm not saying that Darius is in a better parent. Just hear me out.

1. Practical considerations

I know no one wants to hear it, but Camila has been single-parenting 6 kids for 2-3 months. I cannot believe she had no worse breakdown than a (very well-done) nightmare sequence. If Hunter does move in with her post-canon, then that makes her the primary caregiver of 3 severely traumatized teenagers. Again, I'm sure she would do an excellent job as always. But that's still a lot of stress.

Second. Hunter states his desires at the end of Thanks to Them. They are to: study wild magic; learn how to carve palismen; attend Hexside as a regular student; and play flyer derby with his friends. All of these goals would have him spending a lot of time in the demon realm.

One argument I've seen is that Hunter was the happiest we've seen him yet in the human realm, which is true. But I think a lot of that was because he was with his friends in a relatively safe environment. He should be able to get that in the demon realm post-canon, especially since most of his friends will be staying there and he plans to spend so much of his time there. And for feeling safe, he's now been successfully traumatized in both realms so. yay /s

So those are my practical justifications for why it makes more sense for Hunter to stay with Darius over Camila. But I also have reasons based on what we get to see of their relationships in canon.

2. Canon clues that I'm not just reaching

A lot of people seem to be taking it as a given that Hunter will or should end up with Camila based on canon. For the reasons given above, I don't think there's more canon basis for Camila parenting Hunter over Darius.

I also think it's worth noting that Hunter seems rather attached to Darius. During the draining spell, Willow and Amity try to help Eda while Hunter runs straight to Darius to try to wake him up.

In the human realm, Willow, Gus, and Amity draw pictures of their families. IIRC Gus is the only one who verbally mentions his dad. Luz doesn't talk about Eda and King or hang up any pictures, but she does draw them. Hunter doesn't draw anyone, but he verbally mentions one single person from the demon realm. And that person is Darius.

2. Camila's relationship with Hunter in canon

I hate how little we know about it. I know, I know, the Shortening. But it does affect how I view their relationship. In all of the interactions we see, from the learning Spanish to the sewing machine to saving him from drowning, it could have been any of the kids. There's nothing about the way Camila interacts with Hunter to differentiate their relationship from her relationship with Willow, Gus, or Amity.

What I was really hoping to see at some point was any clue about what Camila knows about Hunter's background. Like I’m assuming she at least knows that he was raised by Belos. But the way it came up and who told her what about it is entirely unknown. Does she know he was abused? To what extent? Does she know about his role as the Golden Guard? Does she know how he met Luz, when he threatened to throw her into the boiling sea? Like I know, I get that she would have been as compassionate as always. But if I'm filling the gaps for how these conversations played out, I at least want more evidence that they happened at all.

Because it isn't a given. Again, Camila is working a full-time job and taking care of 6 teenagers, 5 of whom have to live in hiding to some extent and are struggling to adjust and have unique needs because they aren't human. That is so much stress and responsibility on Camila. So the montage and photo album we saw were mostly the kids bonding with each other. We didn't get to see Camila interact one-on-one with anyone but Luz. Which again, yes, the Shortening. But also maybe Camila just didn't have as much time to spend bonding with each individual child as everyone would have liked. It is a very real possibility that a lot of topics relating to Hunter and his childhood simply haven't come up yet.

Also, we know that Camila still has a shaky grasp on the Boiling Isles by the end of TTT. It is totally understandable because she's never been there and has never seen it; the kids are having the same issue adjusting to the human realm. Hunter didn't seem overly eager to talk about his past. Luz didn't seem overly eager to talk about the Boiling Isles in general. I think most of Camila's understanding comes from what Vee told her prior to and during TTT, and what Willow, Gus, and Amity told her while they were there.

So that leaves a lot of room for interpretation about what Camila's understanding of Hunter's situation is, which in turn makes it hard to imagine how any specific interaction or conversation might play out. Like yes, Camila would of course be loving and supportive, and she would say all the right things and model all the correct behaviors, and that's great. But without any canon basis for how Camila uniquely views and interacts with Hunter, it all ends up feeling more like wish-fulfillment to me than a relationship between 2 characters who know each other in canon.

For example, Camila doesn’t seem to be expecting Hunter to stay with her long-term. Because after months in the human realm Hunter is still sleeping on the floor of the basement. But there are so many possible explanations for this, because we don't know anything. Maybe Camila doesn’t know yet that Hunter is functionally homeless. Maybe she does know, and they had a really fulfilling heart-to-heart about it off screen. Maybe Hunter really is already planning to stay in the human realm. Or maybe Camila is under the impression that Hunter already has a place to stay in the demon realm.

Which is its own thing. I am being a bit of a hypocrite. For all we know, Hunter did talk to Darius about this before the Day of Unity and already has plans to move in with him. There are plenty of gaps to go around! So I will move on to:

3. Darius' relationship with Hunter in canon

I will admit it, I'm biased. This relationship is so much more interesting to me, just from the set up.

Because Darius is the only adult we see actually try to help Hunter while Hunter is still living in his abusive situation.

I know there's been discussion and debate about Darius' behavior, so I'll try to keep it brief. Darius did not help Hunter for a long time. He also didn't have any particular responsibility towards Hunter. Darius failed Hunter as much as every other adult Hunter interacted with over the years.

It is unclear based on canon how often Darius and Hunter interacted or what those interactions were generally like. It is unclear what Darius knew or suspected about Hunter's situation prior to Any Sport in a Storm. I think a lot of fandom disagreement comes down to how generously or harshly you interpret Darius when filling in these blanks. So I'll focus on what we do know.

Darius gave Hunter a mission in ASIAS. He didn't mean to; he was just trying to get rid of Hunter. He seems to view Hunter as a lost cause for most of the episode. Because of that and/or the traitor thing, Darius makes no effort to explain what he thinks Hunter is doing wrong. Which is unfortunate, because he is pushing Hunter in the right direction.

Darius encourages Hunter to think for himself at a time when Hunter is still loyal and Belos is still actively working to keep Hunter unquestioningly obedient. And this is before Darius has even taken any real interest in Hunter. He goes about it horribly, but he is already taking the right stance on these fundamental issues, and that matters to me.

Then at the end of the episode, Darius' attitude towards Hunter changes completely. And yes, I know it shouldn't have happened this way. I know Hunter shouldn't have needed to prove himself to earn help and attention. But this show is full of flawed characters who change for the better. So why not Darius?

And Darius shows that he is capable of change. He admits to Hunter "I had you all wrong". He praises Hunter for both making friends and for disobeying him, which is huge for Hunter while he's still in his abusive situation. And then Darius' first action after his revelation is to give Hunter a scroll and encourage Hunter to make connections outside of the castle.

And again, Darius didn't have to do that. He could have just as easily ended the interaction there. He could have agreed to keep Flapjack a secret in return for Hunter keeping his mouth shut about letting the 'recruits' go, and then gone back home to get his beauty sleep.

But he didn't. He gave Hunter a scroll and encouraged him to break out of his isolation more. Then he gave Hunter back his cloak and fixed the cloak and gave Hunter the approval that Hunter spent all episode desperately wanted since the beginning (which is problematic, I know). And then Darius told Hunter to get a sewing lesson, which he very well may have given actually him based on Hunter comparing his stitches to Darius' in TTT.

So did Darius handle everything perfectly? Of course not. But he did consistently push Hunter in the right direction, and by the end of it he does seem actively interested and willing to help. He becomes the first (and tbh only) adult we actually get to see start paying attention to Hunter's situation and intervening with Hunter's best interests at heart.

...And then we don't get to see them interact after that. It's another place where the fandom diverges, particularly regarding whether or not one or more sewing lessons ended up happening.

But we do get some crumbs.

During Hollow Mind, Darius is alarmed when he realizes Hunter got trapped in Belos' mind.

Then in Clouds on the Horizon, Hunter reveals that Darius sent him to escort Luz. I think this scene is overlooked a lot, but it's huge to me. Because it means that Darius and Hunter got in contact some time after Hollow Mind, presumably after Labyrinth Runners.

Like Hunter must have had some pretty severe trust issues after learning that Belos is an evil sadist who manipulated him his whole life. It would've been compounded by Coven Head Adrian showing up at Hexside lying about being a rebel. So even though we didn't get to actually see it, we know something must have happened between Darius and Hunter that somehow got Hunter to trust Darius enough to go on a mission for him on the Day of Unity. And I'm assuming that required Darius to make at least some effort to confront head-on the reality of Hunter's situation and Darius' role as a rebel and all the messy complicated emotions that go along with all of it.

And again, he didn't have to. Darius didn't have to get in contact with Hunter after Hollow Mind. That is a choice that he both made and successfully pulled off. Like I see this hc a lot that Darius can't handle emotional situations, but he was there for Hunter at least to some extent both while Hunter was unknowingly in an abusive situation and while Hunter was coping with the fallout of having everything ripped out from under him. So I don't get why it's so hard to imagine Darius being there for Hunter in emotionally difficult situations post-canon.

Anyway. This scene also tells us that Darius went and gave Hunter the same mission that Eda gave Luz, presumably for the same reason: to let the kids feel useful while also trying to keep them relatively safe and out of the line of fire on the Day of Unity. (And that's it's own thing. There are plenty of parallels you could draw between Darius' relationship with Hunter and Luz' relationship with Eda, particularly in the early stages where things were a bit rocky.)

So. This turned into a little bit of a tangent of why I don't get how it's so inconceivable to some people that Darius is truly capable of genuinely caring about Hunter and/or being able to grow into a parental figure that can do right by Hunter. Because we have canon evidence for all of these things.

2. Canon clues that I'm not just reaching

A lot of people seem to be taking it as a given that Hunter will or should end up with Camila based on canon. For the reasons given above, I don't think there's more canon basis for Camila parenting Hunter over Darius.

I also think it's worth noting that Hunter seems rather attached to Darius. During the draining spell, Willow and Amity try to help Eda while Hunter runs straight to Darius to try to wake him up.

In the human realm, Willow, Gus, and Amity draw pictures of their families. IIRC Gus is the only one who verbally mentions his dad. Luz doesn't talk about Eda and King or hang up any pictures, but she does draw them. Hunter doesn't draw anyone, but he verbally mentions one single person from the demon realm. And that person is Darius.

And I'll accept the hc that the way Darius treated Hunter before was just too unforgivable,

[foggyparadisecandy]

On Love and Loving

Talking with a friend about what love is and how to show it.

For some of you, this might be a silly thing to consider. But for a lot of people (like me), we didn’t grow up with healthy role models for love. And really … love is complicated and hard to pin down.

Most people figure out what works for them. And, yes, it’s easy and common to love more than one person at a time. Different people meet different needs in your life and so your love will often vary by individual.

ELEMENTS OF LOVE

My own love style veers to codependency (I’m working on it) so I’m aware I’m no foolproof expert. Regardless, here are some basics about what feeling love can involve:

Compassion

Affection

Caring

Intimacy

Trust

Commitment

Vulnerability

Attraction

Respect

Need

Passion

Admiration

Desire

Concern

Empathy

There are many different ways to love another person and you won’t necessarily feel or display all of the components listed above.

I think the easiest type of love that people can fall into is passionate love. Where you are completely into the other person. This happens early stage in many relationships when you vibe with someone and really love getting to know them.

As things get a bit more deeper, and you have weathered a few dull moments and possibly a few rough moments, love can grow deeper, and more substantial bonds can form and you can feel the power of deep compassion and care for the other’s well-being.

If you can really see another person, flaws and all, and still accept them, care for them, and want to be with them, substantial attachment can grow.

SHOWING LOVE

And when it comes to displaying love, there are so many ways to do so. People have different love languages so it’s good to determine what your partner(s) respond to.

Here are a few ways to demonstrate love (far far from complete):

sharing plans for the future

being vulnerable

forgiving

being empathetic

supporting their journey to be their best self

admitting faults

looking out for the other person

prioritizing them

showing care

showing affection

sharing yourself

listening

acknowledging their worth

Plus so many more ways, small and large, that show you love them.

IMPACT OF LOVE

Love has many positive benefits for both parties.

It can create better mental and physical health, it can create resiliency, it can make life richer and deeper, it can lower your stress and anxiety, and it can make you more loving. Love breeds love.

Of course, it can turn ugly and foster jealousy, depression, anger, resentments, obsession, possessiveness, anxiety, and sadness.

Love can be complicated and messy. Relationships can be complicated and messy. Sometimes we can find someone we love and things don’t work out.

We can also find someone we love and still find they don’t meet all of our needs in life. Or possibly they do initially but … things change. Needs change. People change. Shit happens. And you might find you fall in love with two people.

That also can be confusing and messy. Ain’t love great?

So yeah … there you go … a basic Love 101.

Usually for most of us, we know love when we know it.

ATTACHMENT STYLE BASICS

I’ve always been lucky in love. I honestly think my Anxious Attachment style helps with that because I’ve always been quick to care and slow to let go. I forgive people and I empathize with them. I have been guilty of people pleasing and keeping my needs quiet (working on it) which is not only unhealthy to suppress my own needs but also builds quiet resentments and cheapens bonds.

But … I’m learning.

Some people are naturally (due to upbringing- don’t blame or shame or hate on yourself!) Avoidant and find it hard to be in a relationship, although they too want love. It makes it difficult to establish deep love when you feel trapped by another person and want to get away.

The answer to both of these styles’ weaknesses is: communication. Honest expression of vulnerability to allow the other person to understand where your head is. “Hey, I’m nervous you are pulling away. Can you comfort me?” “Hey, I’m feeling really skittish. Can I have some alone time? I love you but I just need to have solo time, ok?”

Of course, some lucky bastards (about 50% of us) grew up in healthy households and are Secure in love. I honestly can’t even imagine but I am jealous lol.

Not sure who read all this. If you want to know more about attachment styles, let me know. I’m happy to ramble on about those too.

LOVE DOESN’T HAVE TO HURT

Ahhhhh … love doesn’t have to hurt.

That is a hard lesson for some of us. Our subconscious learned a lesson early on and it will fuck with you and fuck with you and fuck with you and sabotage loving relationships.

Hey … if that happens to you, if you find you do that often … don’t get angry with yourself, ok? Don’t start hating on yourself. <3

It’s been programmed into you from when you were young. Be kind to yourself. Be compassionate. And work to identify when it happens and catch it.

Find a friend to act as a sounding board if you aren’t sure “is this a bad relationship or am I self-sabotaging?” It might sound silly but no … it’s really not.

And in the end, if you really want to heal a lot of internal struggles? Re-read everything above (from the top down) and say “what if *I* was my own partner in love? Do I do these things and treat myself these ways?”

If you don’t, why not start today? What’s stopping you? You deserve love. We all do.

Ok, that’s all for now. I love you.

[soupbabe]

You asked for stuff and my little brain is still so attached to dad Bo, tell me how you think he'd be as a dad, and also how the siblings would be as uncles (plus aunt because we love Maggie<3<3)

I think Bo would genuinely be so nervous 😭 he just wants the best for his kid and I think he'd struggle with breaking the cycle of abuse he grew up with. He has very obviously not healed from his own trauma and having a kid of his own makes him want to be a better man. Like it makes him confront his past, y'know? He'd try his best to be supportive of his kid, Bo wants to be very involved in their life despite him lacking in the heart-to-heart emotion category . Though I think he can excel in raising them in their later teen years as he raised Maggie and Lester when they were 16 and 15 respectively !!

Lester and Vincent are fun uncles. Hands down. They both have such a soft spot for kids, especially Lester. Summer breaks spent with Lester is the most fun a kid could have. And I'd imagine Vincent would try to open their eyes to the world of wax sculpture. I don't think Bo wants his kid to see the brutality behind it all, so it all starts with more innocent, smaller sculptures in hopes that the kid grows a fondness for it. They both know how to have their fun and have their niece/nephew's back no matter what.. though I'd imagine Vincent is a lot more reactive every time they tell him about bullies or s/o drama. He will want to tell Bo and give that kid a piece of their mind (non violently ofc, worst case scenario is just threatening the parents into actually checking the actions of their kid lmao)

AND OMG AUNT MAGGIE HAS ME WEAK <33 SHE GETS SO SOFT ESP IN THE BABY STAGES SHE LOVES BABIES!! I always thought she used to babysit when she was like 13-15, she's met babies/kids with a variety of personalities, probably the most qualified person here 😭 she'll spoil the kid rotten. Goes all out for them on Halloween. Coolest costume at the party, first place everytime. Also I think she can become a good friend to Bo's kid, especially if he has a daughter. Like idk there's definitely more of an attempt to give her the childhood Maggie never had. Make it be known that she's enough and she encourages her to embrace her individuality. She wants to give her a healthier mother figure, call it Maggie healing her inner child.

[wheneverfeasible]

I have for years firmly believed that the Jedi were the cause of Darth Vader, not the Dark Side. Anakin WAS meant to be the chosen one, but the Jedi never allowed him to him.

As the Chosen OneTM, he would inherently be different than the Jedi because he is supposed to be TRUE balance to the Force, not just to heighten the Light Side. He was supposed to be able to have his connections, his attachments, his love, and that was why he was created on a planet far out of the Jedi’s normal range of vision. It’s why he was born impoverished. He had to understand the lowest so that he could empathize with them, not just pity them.

But the Jedi were blinded by the Dark Side, as stated in film, and couldn’t see how far the corruption reached. Their fear kept a tight leash on tradition that didn’t work anymore. They weren’t the villains by any means, but they were unwittingly complacent in evil. And some of them were petty as hell about it too. (Looking at you, Mace.)

If Anakin had been truly encouraged to be the balance, to mend the tear in the Force and balance it completely, he would have been allowed to keep his attachments which made him stronger. He could have told the Jedi about the visions of his mother. They could have helped, might have even been able to save her if they were quick enough. He could have told them about his marriage, the pregnancy, his fear for Padmé. They could have helped him understand that those visions were caused by the Dark Side and protected Padmé and the twins and Anakin would not have felt the need to go to Palpy for help.

Yes, there was darkness in Anakin already. Even before the Jedi found him. Because he was made of both, as the original chosen one. He had to have been to be the balance. He wanted power, but that desire for power came from feeling powerless, came from wanting to protect those he loved. The darkness on him was the only one nurtured and listened to and brought forward by someone he looked up to in a familiar way. Padmé was there, yes, but Anakin was a little lost boy needing a parental figure. And that was exploited.

Had Anakin had the support network he so desperately needed, he could have quite possibly fulfilled his duty as chosen one. But he was failed, and so he failed. And then Luke, even Leia, could have become the next chosen one(s). But their fear, their inner darkness, held them back too because they too had too much of the old Jedi teachings in them. More diluted, certainly, but it still lingered. And so then it fell on to Rey. Rey, equally light, equally dark, born of love and hate. She truly understood how to be not just a figurehead for the Jedi, but a member of the people as well. He attachments made her stronger, and finally she could bring the balance that her forefather could not.

Is the Force truly balanced by the end of the sequel trilogy? Probably not. But it never could be because balance is something you have to work towards. Anakin never got that chance, neither did Luke. Perhaps Rey can, but that part of her story isn’t told to us. And even Anakin saw her as his replacement in the end, telling her to do what he could not. What he was never allowed to do. To be both, and to choose on his own who he was.

Idk. I just have this debate a lot with others and I know not everyone agrees with me, but it’s my personal feelings. I didn’t mean for this to be as long as it is and it definitely isn’t everything I could say on the matter. But yeah.

In essence, the Jedi messed up and were one of the reasons Darth Vader was born because they forbid him the attachments he needed to truly be the Chosen One. (And why Anakin was reborn at the love of his son.) So yeah. I wholeheartedly agree with Dooku.

Didn’t think I’d find myself agreeing with Count Dooku but here I am.

[seekesotsibteadmist]

interview meme

——— character question sheet

▌real name: saima vaher ▌single or taken: single (might be seeing someone depending on the interaction) ▌abilities or powers: teleportation, heightened senses, heightened strength and durability, channeling divine energy, their voice can probably influence others - especially if used in musical or storytelling contexts, heightened ability to navigate through nature

▌eye colour: blue-green ▌hair colour: very light blonde that sometimes fades out into white at the ends. length is a little more than shoulder length - closer to mid-back length these days.

▌family members: considers vanemuine as a father figure of sort, also considers veteema (mother of waters) as a maternal figure. spend a lot of time with metsaema and metsavana when growing up. has some connections with those associated with Estonian folklore in some loose capacity ▌pets: has a garden snake named Laila that they have been taking care of for years.

▌something they don’t like: people making false assumptions, people not being willing to learn anything they don't really know about. ▌hobbies/activities: spending time in nature (in the forests and by the ocean especially), reading, making music, listening to music, attending performances, wood working, working on their gardens, writing, fixing technical stuff in more recent decades, studying whatever subject catches their interest at a given time, traveling ▌ever hurt anyone before: yes, multiple times. ▌ever killed anyone before: yes. not particularly fond of doing so, but they will do so.

▌animal that represents them: barn swallow ▌worst habits: self-neglect, working too much, self-abandonment - tending to put a lot of people before themself at the cost of their own self. not speaking about when they need help or want something. ▌role models: depends. it can be those that kind of raised them, it has been varying human figures over history as well.

▌sexual orientation: bisexual. ▌thoughts on marriage/kids: saima tends to .. think of marriage as something that is for other people not necessarily for them. between them having round experiences of feeling obligated to propose (which presenting differently in the past and getting rejected) and .. just having to deal with so many other things .. they really don't know if marriage is something that they can realistically expect nor desire.

perhaps the right situation will allow them to be comfortable with the idea of marrying someone, but they don't really expect it to be a thing.

kids - they like helping taking care of others' children- they have taught and babysat a number of times over the years. they don't really have ambitions to have children of their own though.

▌fears: being locked away, the land they are so attached to going through more suffering because of world events, betrayal by those that they care about (although a certain part of them kind of .. expects it anyway.. oof) ▌style preferences: saima is someone that has really been actually.. enjoying dressing more lately, they like cool colors, earthy colors as well. they like blouses, mid-knee skirts and layering up in a loose flowy kind of way. but they still enjoy t-shirts, jeans and boots with jackets. they like finding fun little bold accessories and playing around with what they can do now that they feel more comfortable in taking on multiple options. ▌someone they love: people that they live around. they are fond of their recent neighbors especially over the past few years. saima spends a lot of holidays with them and likes being a supportive neighbor in any way that they possibly can. it's a way of them being casually quite embedded in the land and the people that they care about over so many years. different iterations of neighbors, but the kind of consideration remains the same.

▌approach to friendships: saima likes making friends but tends to find them more through their interests - traveling, music, folklore, varying studies and .. maybe through some mutual acquaintances as well. they can be a little cautious about considering someone a friend - so it might take a few run-ins before they are sure that is the case. but once saima considers you a friend, they are eager to spend time and be supportive.

▌thoughts on pie: saima is usually open to a good pie. they will try most varieties of pie if given the opportunity to do so. ▌favourite drink: they are starting to lean into the coffee era again as the weather is starting to get cooler. ▌favourite place to spend time at: in nature - either among the forest, the bogs or by a lake or ocean. ▌swim in the lake or in the ocean: don't make saima choose. both. it's always been both. ▌their type: it's so context dependent for real. i think saima does like people who are a little more sociable than them at least - because it's a good excuse to branch out a bit more. but like they feel comfortable with quieter individuals as well. as long as they get to spend time in nature and have a good listener about all their nerd shit, they are contented honestly. ▌camping or indoors: ...camping. they like indoors - but they will take the chance to good camping if someone is down.

tagged by: @nectaric

tagging: you you you you.

[silentalltheseyearsnomore]

Somehow got through the worst of the crisis. Didn't tell S for the first time. Told her when we saw her and she asked why we didn't reach out and we said we know she's already overwhelmed and if we were to come out the other side we needed her to still be there, we needed to protect our relationship. She got it. It sucks the situation we are both in because of complete lack of support from everywhere else. She is being our care co, advocate, therapist, attachment figure, everything at once because *no one else is* but ofc it is too much. Hence ending therapy. Because the best way she can help is to fight the system for us and get us the right support, while also staying around so we don't have another broken attachment. I know it's her doing everything she can to help us the best she can. It's just hard to not view it through the lens of so many triggers and abandonment. When the reality is she is doing ALL this, soon for free, out of care. It is just not all focused on the care littles want (cuddles lol) and more of what we need. Which is what someone who truly cares for you does.

I value her seeing the situation and knowing our therapy and relationship will be damaged if we continued the same and therefore ending therapy before the damage was too big. Like others should have done. But it still sucks that it means we have to start again with someone else AND get used to seeing her less. It sucks because she doesn't even want to see her less but her life is just so that if we don't see her at work it will be less. I know how much she is doing for us behind the scenes to fight the system and yet child parts just want the time with her. Even if logically her doing that work is what will help most. I value her so much doing this for us. It's just the fear of seeing her less is so fucking huge. From outside it may seem ridiculous because we're so lucky to have an attachment figure who wants to see us anytime she can, and the least it'll be is maybe a couple weeks.. that's kind of a lot, it's more than anyone in her personal life gets besides those she lives with, even family! We'd be fine seeing anyone else every couple weeks!! Yet going from 2 or 3 times a week to knowing she'll struggle for even once a week feels like actual death. Like, we laugh when we see the facts. But for child parts it is like literal death it feels. And I just hope it actually feels okay. We'll get used to it. We'll speak inbetween. We will be adding more support and it won't feel long at all- the isolation does add to the attachment pain, its not ALL about her. Its also about what it triggers, and about being lonely in general. We have to trust that will change. And trust we will feel connected. (Mostly I secretly hope her work thing settles so she has more time lol). Remember there is the possibility for a lot more in the future when we are better, she wants us to be involved in an amazing work thing if we get well enough. WHEN we get well enough. She WANTS us in her life. We are wanted. That is beautiful. That is everything. The rest is just noise and life in the way.

It sucks how when we are connected we feel okay but then we loss it and drown in dread. When we are together we think we can handle ending therapy, these changes, the unknown, all of it. We can feel how much she cares, we know it, we see it. She gave us the most beautiful birthday gift and held us and we talked about the fears and we both are just having to face the unknown as both our lives change. And we just have to trust. Trust that even though her life is changing, even though we have to end therapy, even though xyz, she will find time to see us. She'll still be there even if its different. Trust that this is very different to previous ex therapists (who her supervisors now want us to report and are basically blacklisting already..), because yes we are close but we are doing it healthily and slowly and boundaried. She is not being our mum, she is not promising things she cant deliver like they did. She says the hard things when needed, she knows limits. Trust that that doesn't mean she cares less. Trust she'll still fight to get us the right support. And we have to trust that the right support will actually happen, despite the huge obstacles. And we have to trust we can hold on until it comes. We have to trust so many things we can't see yet.

And when we are with her, we do trust. But when we are apart, it's just overwhelming. We can't take another broken attachment. And I do trust her not to do what others did but I also know the whole situation is so stressful and she is one human trying to do her best. And so are we. I do kind of think it may be okay with her.. she won't go. I feel less sure about getting specialised therapy funded. And I know all our stuff and needs can't fall on our relationship or it will suffer. So we need the other support to work out. And I am scared what happens in the meantime. I've never experienced either thing- enough support or an attachment figure staying in a safe and healthy way. So even if factually it looks like she's staying and it'll be okay, we still need to experience it.

Honestly I have no idea how we'll feel with this transition. I have a feeling either we'll feel like we are drowning, while S is abroad and when back will see her less even if she's doing more for us behind the scenes, and no therapy..... OR, we may feel better. Maybe we dont need our attachment wounds constantly poked at. Maybe space to breathe will help. We've done SO much work internally attachment wise. We've gone from wanting child parts dead to calling them (pet names) lovingly like B did and S now does. And we've had some experiences of them being loved and wanted outside too, even if chaotic and abusive at times. I don't even really know the next step even if I was being offered it. I don't think I ever want such a deep attachment in therapy again. Some kind of attachment sure but our main one? It just feels never endingly painful. I think we do better when it's outside of therapy. And inside of it to an extent too. Just not the main and only. So maybe getting used to S outside of therapy will somehow help us see what is needed moving forward. I so wish K was safe for us..... then we'd have two attachment figures outside of therapy, and the attachment in therapy would feel less brutal and poking with its stupid hour or so a week. But she just isn't. Maybe she never will be. There's no way to know. Right now she isn't. There's S. But she can't be *everything*. And I want more outside of therapy. It's just... we don't really ever attach that way outside. Child parts never do. So I guess we just try and build the attachments and connections outside of therapy. Settle in to what S can be. And maybe we'll see therapy differently going forward.

I honestly have no fucking idea. But I do know what we've been doing isn't sustainable. I do know I don't want my main attachment figure to be my therapist. And I don't know what that means. And it's not like you have a fucking choice in who you attach to anyway lollll who am I kidding. We don't even know what we will be offered yet. Or when. In a few weeks. Years. Its so hard to keep walking forward not knowing how anything looks. And just trusting. And trusting that S won't give up fighting for us or let go of our hand. Trust ourselves that we choose to trust her for good reason and not purely attachment. Trust ourselves to feel her hand is still there even when physically apart. Trust we can keep ourselves safe when we need to. Trust that having to do so doesn't mean we don't deserve others. Child parts deserve to be rescued and protected and kept safe. And we have to trust we can do that, and that others want to, even if they can't always. Trust ourselves that we can grieve the gap between what others can do and what we deserve/d.

[jaderimehardt]

👋🏻 So, I ended up not drawing anything for that character's birthday.

I did think of a pose about a day and a half ago but that isn't enough time for me to actually get anything drawn out and colored. I'm too slow and I set myself to too high of standards. Plus factor in irl things and my lack of motivation... 🫠 *shakes head*

If I feel bad about it, it's for a couple of mutuals who like him as much as I do, or more- even. I've kind of grown super attached to a certain B🔹L🔹E🔹A🔹C🔹H boi, to be completely honest with you (I'm bypassing the tagging system with the 🔹's).

They still draw him every year on his birthday, and one even bi-weekly almost. She has supported me every time I draw him by re-tweeting my artwork on Twitter. Probably the only person who acknowledges me like this on a regular basis. The other person supports me also on a bit of a lesser scale, and she draws him often too, but I think she struggles with confidence in her art like I do.

It's not an easy thing... "having confidence" in one's own art. And when you don't see likes or favorites on your art, that confidence drops tremendously. You feel like you've done something wrong. You try to figure out 'what' you did wrong, and when you can't find it- you just want to give up. It's a sinking feeling.

But inevitably most artists pick up the pen or pencil again and draw once more because it's something we love to do. The thing is, this time we're less likely to share it because of that lack of confidence. This is what has been happening to me slowly over the past couple of years (and to a couple friends of mine as well).

People don't seem to realize this.

"Where did all the fanart go?"

Well, you all got so picky with favoriting things, they lost motivation and stopped posting. What did you expect?

If and when I post things, I have a fear of tagging it. 💠 Well if you don't tag it, no one is going to see it- and then you really won't get likes/faves. ⚜️ Yeah no kidding. but then I have a logical reason for WHY no one likes it. Like Twitter, I get under 10-30 impressions on most my posts even with tags. At the very least if it's posted, it's on record/in my portfolio of sorts. It exists in my history somewhere.

I removed all of my stuff off of my DeviantArt a couple years ago. Now I'm sure when I post things people question if I'm genuine or not because they have no history to look at- no 'portfolio'. Though if they went to my Wordpress Blog, they'd see that I've been drawing and posting my stuff for a long time. But no one is going to go and look into me that far in-depth. "Guilty until proven innocent" means nothing when all they want to do is prove you guilty.

That makes me even more hesitant to post things- but I do have all my PSDs with individual layers, so I can always provide proof whenever necessary. And I know where my posts are, with timestamps and dates. I can defend myself. That's all that matters to me.

I made this blog to "be more creatively unhinged" and to "be ramble-y". That includes putting my thoughts out into the open, "having proof on paper", so to speak.

I also want to show people the path that I'm taking, so if they're interested in taking it- they can. But everyone learns differently. Everyone has a different style. I may absorb information one way and apply it in this manner, while someone else may learn it in a completely different way and apply it in a polar opposite format. It's all a matter of who you are, perspective and variables.

So... one day (or a string of days), I'll post a bunch of videos. I did this a few days ago actually, lol. These are learning tools. Other days I may make tutorials (I used to make a lot of these but then I deleted that blog). Some days I'll promote my Etsy shop (this might happen the most, tbh)- featuring a lot of my Resin things, and graphics I'm working on. And on rare occasion some fanart because I'm at the lowest of low with that atm.

If I do anything fanart I'm thinking my OC's... 🤷🏻‍♀️. People dislike OCs, I'm aware of that but it's not like many people (if any) like my stuff anyways. They say to draw for self-satisfaction. I think it's time to follow that.

And I 💓 H🔹I🔹T🔹S🔹U to death, but his hecking fluffy hair man 🫠. I did my best with his hair in my last fanart- spent hours perfecting the lineart... honestly I was so proud of it. But apparently it wasn't everyone's cup of tea 🤷🏻‍♀️. It is what it is. (I'm still happy with it. I love his hair, please never change it Kubo-san 💝)

I might doodle a lot of the Loomis Method heads cause I like drawing faces. Poses/bodies not so much. In time I'll work my way to the poses but I just want to mindlessly doodle. (I hate drawing hands 😒)

Btw here's another vid on that, and I like this one so much better.

I also want & need to do a full graphic image for a puzzle. My Mom and my Step Dad are really big into puzzles right now and they're just passing them around with all their friends. Like some puzzle group, lol 😅

I think it'd be cool to actually design one myself, buy it from my Partner- Printful, gift it to them, they can complete it and then they can pass it around.

Mother's Day and Father's Day isn't that far away. I just have no clue what to make the graphic, lol. All the things they like are copyright and I'm not crossing into those waters.

I need to find something generic 🤔💭

[swordshq]

seven wanted connections have been added to the page !

EOWYN ARRYN  (  abigail cowen  )  is  in  search  of  their  BETROTHAL  (  romantic / other  ).  they  are  around  25+  and  might  look  like  alex hogh andersen, leo suter, sam corlet, aidan turner, alexander ludwig, archie renaux, ben barnes, cha eunwoo, christian hillborg, dev patel, ewan mitchell, jaako ohtonen, jordan patrick smith, lewis tan, max irons, rege jean page, sean teale, travis fimmel, matthew goode, xu kai, zhang, chen xiao, any male/nb fc.  it  is  not required  to  message  them  before  applying  (  NCMVN  ).  being from a great house, eowyn has lived her life knowing that her marriage would most likely be used as a political tool. while she has come to terms with this truth, it hasn't stopped her from hoping to find love within the arrangement. or friendship, at the very least. (i figure we can plot this out.) i'd love for it to be someone she's not yet met, something arranged by their parents a month or so ago with the intention of introducing the pair while in king’s landing for the the name day festivities. i have a preference for someone from one of the great houses, but am open to other noble houses if the pairing makes sense politically for house arryn.

EDRIC BARATHEON  (  TOM BLYTH  )  is  in  search  of  their  BETROTHAL  (  romantic  ).  they  are  around  26+  and  might  look  like  UTP.  it  is  required to  message  them  before  applying  (  @swordsfired  ).  edric is the eldest son of the lord of storm's end and the nephew to the king... he is required to marry a great house / rich noble house to strength bonds between westeros but he has always had a crush on this person and was happy to accept the arrangement... if they do not support it, we can totally discuss that but in my head she is the ying to his yang and sometimes he doesn't know what he's doing and she helps guide him.

ADARIEN BLACKWOOD  (  archie renaux  )  is  in  search  of  their  BEST FRIEND(S)  (  other  ).  they  are  around  24+ and  might  look  like  UTP (BIPOC preferred) .  it  is  not  required  to  message  them  before  applying  (  @swordsfired  ).  adarien has a lot of friends as he travels a lot and definitely likes to collect people and secrets.. this group of people would be the closest to him and try to see each other a lot... adarien writes letters a lot and sends them via his ravens and definitely wants to keep them busy.

ADARIEN BLACKWOOD  (  archie renaux  )  is  in  search  of  their  HALF-SIBLINGS  (  familial  ).  they  are  around  20+  and  might  look  like  UTP (must be indian and or indian/white).  it  is  not  required  to  message  them  before  applying  (  @swordsfired  ).  adarien was told he was the sole heir to raventree hall and i just think it would be funny if someone came to him one day and said "actually no, i am" and then they have to work out the drama of being illegitimate children or having their parents hide them from adarien (and lie to him).

SANSARA STARK  (  jessie mei li  )  is  in  search  of  their BESTFRIEND/CRUSH   (  other  ).  they  are  around  24+  and  might  look  like  UTP (BIPOC preferred).  it  is  not  required  to  message  them  before  applying  (  @swordsfired  ).  sansara is very into learning swordsmanship, fighting and exploring and would love a best friend who did the same... plus sara gets attached really easily which means she would probably develop a crush on this person but this does not have to be reciprocal because sara would use this as a way to work harder and train harder.

ISABELA  TYRELL  (  kylie  verzosa  )  is  in  search  of  their  BETROTHED  /  SOON  TO  BE  SPOUSE  (  familial/romantic  ).  they  are  around  34+  and  might  look  like  rege    -    jean    page,    adan    canto,    alp    navruz    but    any    masculine    faceclaim.  it  is  not  required  to  message  them  before  applying  (  @bew1tcheds  ).  as  the  oldest  tyrell  child,  isabela  is  set  to  inherit  highgarden  which  makes  her  quite  the  desirable  match  politically  speaking  —  the  second  most  wealthy  region  with  fertile  grounds  —  but  her  parents  are  protective  when  it  comes  to  finding  the  right  person  to  rule  beside  her.  they  have  enough  children  to  continue  the  family  line  if  needed,  deciding  house  tyrell  has  time  to  find  the  right  next  ruling  lord.  after  all,  isabela,  who  has  been  taught  all  about  the  political  court  plays,  is  easily  swayed  by  pretty  flowery  words  from  lord,  ladies  and  lieges  alike  ⸺  too  trustworthy  in  the  good  of  mankind.  thus,  they  worry  about  her  naivety  when  it  comes  to  finding  a  suitable  partner  who  will  make  house  tyrell  stronger.  however,  your  muse  would've  been  able  to  charm  the  ruling  lord  and  lady  tyrell  into  this  betrothal  with  their  heir  but  it's  a  different  story  with  isabela  —  unlike  her  docile  nature,  following  her  parents'  word,  she  is  wary  of  him.  (  not  going  into  too  much  detail  about  their  relationship  because  i  would  love  to  plot  this  out  /  let  chemistry  play  out  )

LUCIFER YRONWOOD ( ekin koc ) is in search of their WIFE ( romantic ). they are around 28-33 and might look like aslihan malbora (!!), sevda erginci (!!), katie mcgrath, freida pinto, oona chaplin, nathalie emmanuel, sibylla deen , sophie skelton, ask mun . it is required to message them before applying ( @dcstiniesfm or my discord hyacinth0715 ,  as my blog is currently shadowbanned ). theirs could either be of a love marriage or an arranged marriage. either way, love & passion has indeed blossomed between this couple and she is one of the most precious people on earth to him. queen of his heart & soul. i have also hc that they've been married for about 2-3 years now and are now currently trying for a baby. btw, if this started out as a love marriage, then her maiden home should be from dorne as lucifer rarely travels out of dorne for pleasure.

[plutothe-pup]

Write your RPer Resolutions for 2023! (What are some goals for yourself as a writer? Improve descriptions? Plot with more members? Etc.)

Plot more; I’m very much a hands-off kind of person and often I do not approach people to plot or respond well to other’s coming to me to plot. I think this also just has to do with me and my socialization in general. I tend to fly by the seat of my pants and that’s fine and all but I do think I should probably actually engage in fully planned/developed and laid out plots for once. 

I would say a resolution is to dive into big plots more - but that is a lie. I will not do that even if I say I will. Maybe I can say focus on personal plots more?? idk

do more tasks - but the way this one is going is not a good indication I will follow through on this lmfaooo

/cracks knuckles and pulls out megaphone: No. More. Characters.; That’s right. That’s my resolution. I don’t want a SINGLE NEW CHARACTER in the entire year of 2023. I want to put all of my focus on the three I have currently in continuing, expanding and guiding their storylines and I want to focus solely on them. Like the good ol’days. Like when Lauren had a whole one character and refused to get a second one. Bringing it back. I will not fall to peer pressure. I will not be swayed. I will be strong. I will be brave. ( x ) 

Stop using song titles as thread titles. 

Stop using em dashes and the phrase ‘after all’ 

Write at least one resolution, or “goal,” that you have as an RPer for your character(s)

Greg: Explore relationships and mend the fight between himself and his parents. Get back on the upwards slope. Alternatively - spiral into Greg’s new normal. No in between. Chaos energy only. Graduate his Masters program.  Seb: Get this man a new job, or join the VFD. SOMETHING. He needs purpose. Build bridges between the gaps in his relationships with his brothers. Try and break the attachment to his biological ghost family so he can have peace.  Milo: Originally I wanted him involved in both sides of the fence. I wanted Milo to dip himself into the kinds of things he was raised to do and continue having that moral/family conflict of doing what he knows is right vs what he was raised to think was right. To have him excel in something shady and have to dig his way out of that mess - the problem is he’s like too deep in wanting to impress Pip that it’d be a lot more difficult to pursue this. So perhaps just FINDING HIMSELF. 

Write at least one resolution IN CHARACTER for your characters. What do THEY want to accomplish or change in the New Year?

day 1: imma skip this one day 2: ....oh my. all of my characters suck and are like ‘resolution? lol’  day 3: maybe I can leave it blank.  day 4: damn well I guess I can’t bc the last one needs these...  day 5: god DAMN this is hard why do yall suck so hard day 6: ok seriously  day 7: im not even going to do this god day 8: TODAY WILL BE THE DAY.....ugh

Greg: Survive until 2024. Move. ...hm. OBTAIN THE LEGENDARY WEBKINZ CROWN OF WONDER.  Seb: [Redacted].  Milo: Graduate Secondary, help Pip get enough money to attend NYU, pay back Amy & Pip, Figure out his future. BREAK HIS CURSE. 

List one or more characters you have never interacted with that you would like to do so

Doc - Doc is a lil shit and I love watching him cause old-man disgruntlement yet also still be very sweet and kind. I just think he’s neat

Jake - I can’t say I’ve never interacted with Jake, but I’ll consider not having interacted with Jake since 2018 (?) never. Which is surprising because him and Greg had very many potential connections and similar interests and would probably be........... - well not friends, Gregory is complicated but.. friendly. 

Drakken - That’s a chaotic energy I would love to be a part of. 

Talk a bit about your plotting style – what plots are you most drawn to? Do you prefer to come with a fully-formed idea and plot off that, or throw stuff at the wall and see what sticks?

As I think I’ve mentioned before I’m a... Best Supporting Actor kind of plotter. Which means that very rarely do I have this large arching plots for myself or my own characters, but instead am just happy to offer my characters in supporting roles towards other people’s plots. In case you haven’t noticed a lot of my large plots with my own characters often even happen off screen and I just casually drop mentions of it in threads until it finally comes to light (if it even ever does. For example; as mentioned above, Gregory has been completely estranged and hasn’t spoken with his parents since the Ruff to Fluff Re-opening. Did I ever do a formal plotted thread or self-para regarding this? No. Not really. Did I drop minor mentions of it here and there in various threads. Yes lol. This is how I work) Anyways - Which means I am very much in my own regard just a throw stuff and see what happens person. I have never been very good at having big central plots and huge inter-weaving story lines that all come together for one big thing. I’ve always just kind of been like ‘...what if we do x?’ and then see what happens with literally no further information. It’s incredibly hard for me to follow a bullet-point plot or to even plot a fully organized timeline kind of thing. My plotting style for the most part is.......... oh you want to do that? ok. - or ‘I’m going to answer this open’. 

Talk a bit about character relationships – what relationship are you most drawn to? How do you prefer to approach shipping (if at all!)? What, specifically, are you looking for right now for your character relationships? 

I’m very much fond of platonic, found family types of relationships, which...I think is evident if you look at most of my characters or the history of my characters. The large majority of them, if not......... all of them formed found-family relationships the most. Dodger, Greg, Roscoe, Milo, Sebastian. Those are usually the central relationships with my characters. Shipping is probably one of the rarest relationship plots I form if only because my approach to shipping is to........ not approach it at all. All of my ships form simply by authentic in character interactions and seeing where they go. They’re often not at all talked about or even discussed until the relationship/crush/etc is already well established. Right now I’m just looking to grow tighter/closer bonds for all of my characters since I seem to be playing two recluses at the moment and one social puppy who is trying to make friends. I want all of them to grow stronger bonds in friendships, but they do not make it easy. 

Talk about your dash reply style and your Discord reply style! (And if applicable, also your doc reply style). What do you like about each type of interaction? What is something you feel is difficult? 

My dash reply style is based solely on availability. I am definitely not the type of person who can post daily, and often it ends up happening on weekends but I do try to also post throughout the week. I’m also not a ‘few posts a day’ kind of person. When I have the time and the muse, I will literally charge through my entire draft list and spam the dash with every single thread I have at one time. When availability and time allows, I’m also very into back & forth dash RPing!!! Please never be afraid to hit me back right away, I came from RP’s that centered around the back and forth when online style and while I’ve adapted slightly to this RP, I still do enjoy that. Unfortunately, like I said, availability keeps me from replying to dash replies as much as I want to. 

I love a discord thread, if only because the simplicity of being able to reply on the go and anywhere I am at is very nice. Even if I’m away on a trip or on vacation or something, I enjoy still being able to reply to Discord events & threads. I’ll reply to these so long as I’m around and they’re much easier and often take less thought than dash replies so it feels like a far larger amount of development can happen in a much shorter time. Standing events? special events? private server.... just in dms. whatever. love a little back and forth quick rping. little tidbits or musings. always fun. love discord. 

My doc reply style is similar to dash, but also more available as I can reply on the go or wherever. However, the downside to doc replies is I often forget about them and am like ‘oh shit the doc’ because they’re not right in front of me and I’m not just visiting Google Docs every day like I am tumblr or discord. I only really do doc stuff if a) it’s a secret/private thread we want to keep hidden until it’s done. b) it’s a time sensitive thing/heavy thing, c) it was from the past/or for the future and we just know we won’t hit the actual time period on the dash. 

Plotting Exercise! Pick one of the resolutions/goals in #3 and plan a rough guideline to how you could accomplish it. Here’s an example.

Milo seeking help for his curse: 

Milo talks to Pip about trying to break his curse after a series of unsuccessful attempts at finding some kind of good middle ground for what Milo can and can’t do. They discuss some starting ideas and Pip gives Milo people he might be able to talk to. 

Milo goes back to Mim since she’s one of the few people who know about his curse and has tried to help before. He hopes that Mim might have some connections that could help and he gets information on Martin, who also might point him in the direction of other people who could assist. 

Milo meets back up with Pip at Hatters and discusses what he’s discovered (nothing), and laments the fact that he’ll be cursed forever, much to Pip’s disagreement. 

Desperate for some kind of answer, Milo seeks medical help because maybe a doctor can help and tries to get Tibbs or Dian to fix him. Though there’s nothing they can do for a curse and have no choice but to send him away. 

Milo runs into Yzma and spills his secret to a stranger in a fit of desperation - agrees to be a test-dummy for experiments or whatever they need in exchange for any chance of breaking his curse. 

Considering seeking a higher power in the BOARD and see if Swynlake itself has any recommendations or resources for cursed persons. Try to speak with Al, or Isaac. 

Give up. 

(Not the canon take, I can assure you) 

[itsdanii]

Rejecting you and regretting it

genre: angst to fluff

warnings: slight cursing, rude behavior (resolved), do message me if I forgot any.

ft. sakusa kiyoomi, tsukishima kei

Sakusa Kiyoomi

you're not oblivious to the fact that kiyoomi is a very conscious person

that's one of the things you loved about him

he was hygienic and he always made sure that his health was his utmost priority

but one downside is that kiyoomi had the tendency to push people away because of his straightforwardness

you were used to it and in fact, you were one of those people he tolerated

but everyone has their bad days

and unfortunately for you, today was kiyoomi's and since you were always attached to him by the hip, he unintentionally snapped at you

what's worse is that he snapped at you the moment you confessed to him

"Omi!" you shouted happily as you entered the gymnasium, giving Komori a small wave before making your way to where Kiyoomi was sitting.

He looked at you with a frown. He wasn't wearing a mask since they were training awhile ago and only took a quick break. "Y/n, what are you doing here?"

You sat beside him making Kiyoomi grimace and slightly move away. You frowned at him, completely displeased at the action. "I just wanted to give you a visit. Plus, I have something to tell you."

You started to fiddle with your fingers nervously. You practiced your confession several times already but doing it seemed harder than you thought.

"What is it? Talk, I'm not in the right mood to socialize right now."

Out of panic, you quickly blurted out a rather loud, "I like you!" You immediately covered your mouth with your hand and stared at him wide eyed.

The other players looked at you with sympathy, knowing what's about to happen. Out of all days, you really had to confess today, when Kiyoomi was in a pissy mood after several fangirls pushed themselves against him this morning, not minding his personal space.

Kiyoomi stared at you with a serious expression before standing up. "I don't like you. Leave."

"But Omi.."

"You're irritating and you always bother me when it is clear that I don't want your company." He turned around and left you on the bench, your head casted down in humiliation.

You whispered a small sorry before running out of the gym with tears falling from your eyes.

For the next few days, you did your very best to stay away from Kiyoomi. You changed your route to school knowing that your usual route meant that you have to pass by his house. Even if you got scolded several times for being late, you did not stop.

You sat near the door so you can easily exit the room after class. You even stopped eating with Komori and Kiyoomi during breaks and lunch. Even your usual routine of visiting the gym during practices was stopped.

At first, Kiyoomi didn't mind. He knew that you'd come back in a few days just like you always did. You like him after all, right?

But when a few days turned into weeks, He started getting bothered. Why weren't you pestering him like always? Why did you stop visiting him? You said you like him, right?

It was the second week that Kiyoomi took action. He woke up extra early to wait for you infront of your house, aiming to confront you about your behavior.

When you went out, your eyes widened slightly upon seeing Kiyoomi waiting for you outside. He was wearing his face mask while staring at you intently, letting you know that he purposely waited for you.

You looked down and was about to walk pass him when you felt him tugging on your wrist. Your gaze snapped to his hand, not believing that he was indeed touching your skin.

"Sakusa?"

His eye twitched at the weirdness of you not calling him like usual. Sighing, he stepped a little closer to you, hand still holding your wrist to ensure that you won't run away from him.

"You're ignoring me," he said while eyeing you. "Why?"

You took your hand from him and furrowed your brows. "I'm just doing you a favor. I don't want to be a bother anymore. Isn't this what you wanted?"

"I-"

"It's fine, Sakusa. You don't have to force yourself to apologize just because you feel bad or obliged to."

He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. "I'm not apologizing because I feel bad."

"Then what? You're apologizing just to make fun of me? I know I said I like you but that doesn't mean that you have the right to-"

"You don't get it!"

At this point, you were both raising your voices. Some passersby were looking at you two weirdly, some even running as to not get caught up in the fight.

"Get what, Sakusa? Why don't you tell me so I can understand?!"

"I like you!" Kiyoomi exclaimed. "I... Fuck. I like you, okay? I wasn't in the mood when you confessed and I rejected you without thinking. I messed up. The moment I saw you walk out, I knew I fucked up real bad and I-"

"Om-"

"And I thought that you'd come back the next day to bother me again like usual. I wanted to apologize but my pride-"

You sighed as he continued to ramble. With fast movements, you stood on your tiptoes and encircled your arms around his neck to pull him down to you, kissing him over his mask.

When you let go, Kiyoomi was silent. His eyes were wide and you thought that you went over board. Panic made its way to your face as you try to find the words to explain.

"Sorry, I didn't me-"

This time, he was the one to cut you off. Kiyoomi took off his mask and bent down to kiss you on your lips. One of his arms snaked around your waist to support you while the other settled on your nape, angling you to him.

"Be my s/o."

Tsukishima Kei

Everyone in Karasuno knew how much you like Tsukishima

In fact, you remind him everyday

You often give him fresh strawberries from the market and even bake him strawberry cake

Sometimes, you would put little sticky notes on his belongings and write some encouraging words like "you can do it", "I believe in you" or "take it easy!"

On his birthday, you even gave him a hoodie with a dino design (which he secretly loved)

There are times that you knew Tsukishima gets irritated when you visit and even snaps at you but you didn't mind. You liked him and a small snap will not discourage you

But what you didn't know was that it would only take one conversation to completely shatter your heart

"-And they're back," Sugawara said as he saw you enter the gym, a bubbly smile present on your face as usual.

"Kei!" You skipped your way towards Tsukishima and handed him his water bottle which you voluntarily refilled with hot water.

He only gave you a 'tsk' and took the water bottle. Adjusting his glasses, he stared at you from head to toe as if analyzing you, a small blush appearing on his cheeks.

"What are you looking at? Have you finally come to realize that you like me back?" you cheekily asked, poking his bicep.

"No. I was just wondering how someone could look so ugly."

Despite what he said, you forced yourself to giggle, covering your upset feeling with an eye roll. "Oh shut up, Kei. You don't have to hide it, you know? Don't worry, I'm not going to reject you."

You winked at him causing Tsukishima to blush even more.

The rest of the boys snickered and laughed at his reaction which made Tsukishima more embarrassed than he already is.

"Just confess to the girl already, Tsukishima. Can't you see she's trying hard to win you?" Daichi said with a small chuckle while patting Tsukishima's back.

Tsukishima just huffed and pushed his glasses up. "What's there to like? They're nothing but an eyesore anyway."

"What?" you asked in disbelief.

Having a playful banter with Tsukishima was normal in your routine but this was the first time he called you such an offensive term. Does he really think of you that way?

"Oh come on, stop acting dumb. I don't even get why there are guys running after you. I mean, there's really nothing much to look at, right?"

Everyone grew quiet at what he said, clearly not expecting Tsukishima to be at such level of rudeness.

You swallowed the lump forming in your throat as your insecurity skyrocketed. "I try hard every single day to look presentable to you. I-"

You paused for a moment to laugh pathetically at yourself. "I exert a lot of effort to make you notice me. I cook for you, I give you gifts. Heck, I even stay after class to help clean the gym so that the task would be easier for you and I'm not even asking for anything in return."

Tsukishima glared at you sharply that you immediately felt extremely smaller than him. "I never asked you to do those things for me."

"Can't you at least show me that you care?" You wiped your tears with the back of your hand. "Because I'm slowly getting tired of this push and pull game."

"Don't you get it? I don't like you. Why don't you stop pushing yourself to me and start getting a life, hm?"

"Tsukishima, that's enough!" you heard Daichi yell at him.

"Y/n?" Sugawara was immediately beside you, his hand rubbing circles on your back in attempt to calm you down.

"No-" You lifted your face up to meet Tsukishima's eyes. "I think he's right. I should stop being a nuisance and focus on myself."

"I'll leave you alone. I'm sorry," you said before giving Tsukishima a bow and leaving the gym with everyone's eyes following your figure until the door shut.

Everyone could only look at Tsukishima as he cursed under his breath.

"Shit."

The moment you left the gym, you headed straight to the comfort room to let your tears out. You stared at yourself on the mirror as tears cascaded down your cheeks.

"You're beautiful," you reassured yourself while pointing at your own reflection. "What he said doesn't make you any less. Know your worth."

You wiped your tears and splashed your face with cold water before getting out and heading to class without sparing Tsukishima any glance.

You ignored Tsukishima, stopped visiting the gym and focused on yourself. You even made made friends with some of your classmates that you didn't bother getting associated with last time because you were too focused on capturing the attention of Tsukishima.

Unbeknownst to you, a certain male was eyeing you as you interact with other people. He blamed himself for pushing you away. He didn't talk to you, thinking that you only wanted space for a couple days before bothering him again.

He knew that what he said was out of line and he regret everything he did. He even asked Yamaguchi and the rest of the team for advice but all of them responded with the same answer - apologize and tell you how he feels.

Tsukishima gripped the pen tightly as he watched you laughing at something your classmate said. The said classmate was too close to you and it was obvious that he was trying to flirt with you.

"Tsukki?" Yamaguchi called out. He followed Tsukishima's gaze and sighed. "Why don't you go and talk to them?"

"Tsk. Why would I do that? Can't you see they're enjoying his company?" Tsukishima bitterly said.

"You'll end up losing them if you don't do something about it now. Who knows, they might already be lo-" Yamaguchi stopped as Tsukishima instantly stood up and made his way to where you are.

Taking your wrist, he pulled you towards him, heading out of the classroom.

"Tsukishima, what the hell?!" You tried to resist but his grip on your wrist only tightened.

You gasped as he suddenly stopped, trapping you against a wall with his arms beside your head.

"I'm sorry." Tsukishima closed his eyes, balling his fist as he bowed his head. "I said hurtful words to you and no amount of apology will take those away but I want you to know that I regret every single one of it."

You bit your lower lip as you felt yourself tearing up once again. "Do you really think that I'm ugly? I was hurt, Kei. It's just.."

"I'm sorry." His hand made its way to your cheek, cupping your face while he wiped your tears with his thumb. "You're not ugly."

You shook your head and averted your gaze from him, a sob escaping your lips as you felt yourself falling for him deeper. "Don't. Just stop. I'll accept your apology but please just leave me be. I won't be able to stop my feelings for you if you keep leading me on."

"But I don't want you to stop."

"What?"

"I've fallen for you." He tipped your chin up with his hand making you look at him and you were surprised to see the vulnerability in his features. "Please look at me again, y/n. Keep loving me because I swear that I'll do things different this time. Give me a chance."

You can't help but encircle your arms around him, burrying your face on the side of his neck as you nodded repeatedly. "One chance, Kei."

Tsukishima hugged you tightly, lips pressing on the side of your head. "One chance." He leaned away from you and held your face with his hand, eyes boring to yours admiringly.

"You're beautiful."

Likes and reblogs are appreciated ❤️

[violettelueur]

— GOJO SATORU + KYOTO TECH STUDENTS || GOJO’S CIVILIAN S/O BEING A PARENTAL FIRGURE TO THE KYOTO STUDENTS

↳ featuring : gojo satoru + the kyoto side from jujutsu kaisen

↳ warnings : grammar issues

↳ form : headcanons

↳ published : 23 may

↳ pronouns : she/her

↳ request : Hello, good day and good evening, I hope you are doing well. A while ago you made a civilian s/o with Gojo and how the tokyo students see them as a parental figure. If it's no trouble, could you also include how the Kyoto branch would be as well? I'm curious of how would he students, Utahime and Gakuganji would treat gojo's civilian s/o. :3c

↳ barista’s notes : this is going to be the last headcanon for today and tha i hope you enjoy your cup of classic black coffee and please return when you can ╲ʕ·ᴥ·　╲ʔ

Now that we have established your relationship with the Tokyo side of the Jujutsu Tech establishment, let’s see how you are to the Kyoto side.

The person that admires you the most has to be Miwa because she sees you as someone that is perfect for Gojo even if she does have a tiny MASSIVE crush on him.

She will ask you for tips and tricks on how to become more powerful since you are able to fight for yourself due to the training Gojo gives you - it will bring horrible flashbacks for you - but she does admire your bravery to be with him since you are a civilian that didn’t know anything about curses until he came into your life.

Since we know Miwa does have a few younger brothers, she loves how you take care of them and make sure they are well since she did mention to you once that she was poor.

Mai actually took a while to warm up to you since you were just a civilian that was just like Maki, who can’t see curses (she did degrade you for some time, I can’t lie)  However, once she saw how you were like with Maki, she did become somewhat jealous because her older sister now technically had a parental figure.

So when you come over with Gojo or when she visits Tokyo Jujutsu Tech, she will make the effort to come up to talk to you since you did tell her to ‘take her time’ and with one pat on the head and a sweet smile, she is instantly hooked onto your arm.

Now since Mai and Miwa had a good relationship with you, Nishimiya already has a protective aura around you because of her views on women being treated unfairly in the jujutsu world and since you were just a civilian, she is more worried about you since you are one of the reasons why Mai gets to smile again and one of the only people that sympathise with her because you understand her point of view - she is, on the low, scared to lose you.

Now with the boys, Todo is someone that respects you since you are quite brave for being with the Gojo Satoru but you are his one way to contact Okkotsu to ask him for a re-match.

No matter what, when he sees you, he will always greet you with a smile and ask if you could call Okkotsu for him and to be honest, you do it because it’s funny to hear Okkotsu calling you for help.

Mechamaru is someone who will talk to you here and there and sometimes (when he is comfortable) will tell you about his feelings and how he wants to be with everyone - leading you to open up to them about how you wished to be stronger causing him to feel more at ease with you.

He doesn’t admit it, but really loves talking to you here and there since you treat him like the person he is rather than the robot he is confined to use to communicate to people - you are someone that he definitely once met when he is able to physically.

Now Kamo was a difficult one to break into because of his position within the Jujutsu world and how much of a difference there is between you and him.

You remind him of his mother and he will try to keep some distance so he doesn’t get too attached but he will make the means to communicate with you.

When you tell him that it’s okay to talk to you when you are ready, he will take some time to think about those words and take his time to reach out to you - so when he sees his classmates talking to you on the whim like you are their parents, he is encouraged to do the same thing.

Kamo does rant to you a lot about how he wants to find his mother and he does thank you for being the support that you are as his ‘substitute’ you could say - he isn’t good with words.

You treat the Kyoto side the same as how you treat the Tokyo side because all of them have a different past that they trust you with even if you are a civilian and Gojo can see the effect you have on the students.

Gojo is really grateful for how you are able to cope with the pressures around you and really admires you for fighting them - something the Kyoto students can see as well.

Gojo loves you for giving the students something they don’t have when they enrol at Jujutsu Tech and how patient you are for them to open up to you.

I don’t think the Kyoto students will call you ‘mom’ but over time, it will slip up and then the Tyoko side will sense that - little jealousy fight here and there...be honoured.

Gojo will tease him about and say how adorable it is, while they are giving him the irritated look but he doesn’t tell them to call him ‘dad’ because he knows Utahime will make him run laps around the school.

Overall, you are a mother figure to both sides of the school and somewhat their support system when they need comfort and care the most - you are someone they can rely on and someone that tells them why they are a sorcerer (to protect people like you).

© violettelueur 2021 : written and published by violettelueur - do not steal or repost