#because tbh it's pretty disheartening actually

[seagulley]

spoke to our vet about Puppy Plans yesterday and found out that apparently one of the biggest GR breeders in the country is producing questionable temperaments… this matches what our rally instructor told me, although she didn’t say it quite as directly. anyway i love having good contacts in the dog world who can tell me shit like this 😌

[frogchiro]

I don't why but I feel that sleazy neighbors ghost was a pretty sad timeline for him, because ghost is someone with a lot of trauma and faces so may hardship in his life so you hoping that he live a long live and retired from the military in a comfy house in countryside with a lot of dogs getting visited by other 141 member too because they also retired.

And then him in this au just getting discharged along with other member living in the cheap apartment out of nowhere drinking cheap beer and playing card just make me feel disheartened by it. But hey at least he meet reader so it's good I guess...

Sorry for making this timeline sadder but I just can't help but overthink it.

Oh no please don't apologize!! Tbh believe me or not but there actually is lore underneath all of this😭

Because it is in fact quite the sad timeline for everyone involved under all that horny and sleaziness!

Reader (whom I more or less based on Hackergirl if her life went wrong, my poor girl) who was kicked out by her shitty parents when she was 20 because 'they were done raising her' with quite literally nothing to her name besides a few belongings and the clothes on her back. Had to put her education on hold because she couldn't afford it and now is stuck in this seemingly hopeless situation in that cold, bleak apartment building and yet she has to survive.

Simon who got dishonorably discharged from the military which meant no additional vet money for him even after years of service. While in this au he's...not alright at all in his head and has quite unnerving and dark tendencies, it's still hard to watch as this clearly damaged man went from having (more or less) something to basically nothing, degraded to sitting in a falling apart, dark and cold apartment, sipping cheap booze and...yeah, exactly, what more is there?

Johnny was actually dishonorably discharged too for being caught driving under the influence. One fuck-up, one time he told himself that nothing bad will happen and before he knew it he was caught by the police, put in handcuffs and dragged in front of a stern judge. Humiliated and left with basically nothing and working a dead-end job because he never really amounted to anything besides his military career that is now in the past.

[not-poignant]

I was surprised to hear that Ice Plague is a lesser read story from you! It’s one of my favorites and something I re-read often. I treasure that little family. I’ve never loved these particular characters more, they’re all my favorite versions of them. It’s such a beautiful and brilliantly plotted book!

Oh thank you anon!!

Tbh I think there were a few things working against it:

It came at the end of an already long series and there's more drop off the longer a series goes for, because it can only keep the people reading it, and doesn't attract new readers (though it attracted a few who didn't like Gwyn/Augus!)

A lot of people just didn't want to leave Gwyn/Augus behind and/or didn't like Mosk/Eran (I learned my lesson there)

It was actually written a lot more like a book series because I was writing them with a view to publishing down the track, which means of the whole Fae Tales Verse series, The Ice Plague is the one most ready to go directly to paperback/hardback etc. But I actually think that style of like epic fantasy storytelling is a bit less compatible with AO3 serials.

I wrote less cliffhangers. I now write a lot more cliffhangers (for all people hate them, they just do create more connection to a story as long as they're breaks and it's not constant).

I still love The Ice Plague. At the time I got really disheartened with it, and then I reread it and I was like 'wait this is fucking good though???' - I also think this and the final epilogue give Gwyn and Augus the happiest ending they could ever hope for.

In terms of writing quality, it's the story I'd publish first in the Fae Tales Verse even if it's out of order. It was the thing that was like 'shit, I can do this, and I can do this pretty well actually.' But I didn't know that at the time, because I was watching like... every metric of engagement dwindling over the years.

I'm afraid of this happening again with Underline the Red and Underline the Silver, but...I'll just have to suck it up and figure it out if it does happen! And in the meantime, I don't regret writing those stories, I'm just sad that it all fell out the way that it did. There are some of us who really love TIP, and I toast to like all of you, because whether you found it during the series or after the series, it's kept me going! <333

[riacte]

Idly daydreaming about "choose which Rendog duo you like more" poll but it is appropriately and respectfully seeded, scheduled, managed, spreadsheet'd with the intention of trying to be as well run as the mcytblrsexyman poll which imo is still THE best run poll on the hellsite.

So it's gonna be like 16 duos, not defined as romantic/platonic, just see it as whatever/who they are. Then final 8, final 4, final 2, yay! And I need this to be seeded for my own sanity otherwise we'll get finale-level matchups in the first rounds and that will make everyone explode.

Seeding is beautiful (even if it's sort of unfair to lower quarter of entries). If a poll doesn't use seeding, then I don't trust it sorry.

Anyways I think this could actually work because Ren has so many duos and he does a lot of story, I think most duos have a lot of thoughtful moments that make for excellent propaganda. These aren't random fuckass Twitter duos firehusbands whatever who have interacted for one funny collab. There is history across the seasons and the years. There's storylines. There's babies involved. Multiple babies even. Whatever Ren and Cleo have going on. The king and his loyal knight. The queen and her guard. "But these can apply to different���" yes this is exactly why.

And I would say it's pretty obvious who the favourite is except they have been on a downright hilarious losing streak recently. And losing is their thing tbh. I'm so sorry.

Reasons I would not run this poll (other than lack of time and despite me liking spreadsheets):

Renskall would absolutely get steamrolled in Round 1 against a duo that almost certainly by definition came into existence later than Renskall. And I know it would be an embarrassing loss, think 30/70. This would dishearten me and I would scuttle into my cave and pull out videos from 2018.

False and Ren would most likely inevitably lose to yaoi and. And. Actually I'll keep my mouth shut for the sake of preserving peace.

Ren is so good at teaming up with people that I can probably imagine what the polls will look like anyway:

Final 2: Doc, Martyn

Final 4: False, Iskall (let me clown, he's here and he STAYS here)

And the 16 probably includes: Bdubs, Scar, Grian, Cleo, BigB, Etho, Lizzie, Cub, Xisuma...

Anyways. HomiesBeforeHoes 👍 (my hypothetical motto for the hypothetical campaigning)

[presidenthades]

So... 😳🤯

What did you think of episode 3?

I’m starting to realize I have a pattern in my general opinion of the episodes. When you look at scenes and dialogue at an individual level, it can be pretty great. The writers are churning out a lot of moments that are destined to become screenshots, quotes, GIFs, and memes that get reposted a lot on social media. But if you step back and look at the big picture, you realize it doesn’t make sense and there’s a lot of inconsistency/lack of logic.

I’m still enjoying the show more than not, but that’s mostly because of the acting, set design, costumes, music, etc. The writing is the weak spot, and it’s disheartening. But that means the show is prime material for fanfic, so silver linings? Maybe? 🤷🏻‍♀️

I’m not a fan of the show’s consistent theme of “women are good, men are violent and want war.” That ain’t feminism, and feminism isn’t supposed to be the moral lesson of the Dance anyway.

I like that Rhaenys is generally level-headed, but I don’t like that the show wants us to pretend like her mass-murdering a bunch of smallfolk at the Dragonpit is no big deal, or that somehow it’s supposed to look bad for the Greens instead of the Blacks. If nobody rioted over Rhaenys’s actions, then nobody should be rioting over the hanging of the rat-catchers. And yet it’s only the hanging of rat-catchers which catches flack. 🧐

Alicent and Criston are unofficially having a fight. TBH I think they’re more interesting like this than when they’re just having sex all the time. I do love that Gwayne seems to realize something is up between them almost instantly; definitely Otto’s son.

Speaking of Gwayne: he’s a smarmy rich kid, and I kind of love him. I would loathe him in real life, but he’s just so fun to watch.

I’m glad that Rhaena finally gets dialogue!!! I love that we see her complicated emotions about being sent away because she’s the only non-dragonrider. The leak about her and Sheepstealer seems more and more likely…but I really am hoping Nettles remains in the show. I would prefer if Rhaena’s arc demonstrates that you don’t have to be a dragonrider to have a good story and be of value to the war effort, and her hatching Morning is a great moment in the book.

I also prefer the theory that Daenerys’s eggs came from Dreamfyre, but it’s not a hill I’m gonna die on.

I LOVED Harrenhal. Spooky vibes, Simon Strong just being like “we don’t want trouble,” Daemon’s hallucination sequence, first glimpse of Alys Rivers. It’s giving me ideas for more Joff adventures. Honestly, I would love if HBO produced some kind of Westerosi horror ghost story anthology.

This is a very minor scene in the episode, but it baffles me so I’ll chat about it a bit. When Rhaenyra is worth her council and they suggest “go somewhere safe while we conduct the war effort,” she calls it treason.

Why is it treason?? They’re literally telling her their ideas to her face. They’re not hiding anything. And it’s basically what happened in the book: Rhaenyra sat out of most of the war while other people conducted it. I feel like this particular scene/dialogue was forced to showcase that Rhaenyra is a woman in a man’s world.

Rhaenys and Corlys’s scene was very sweet. It’s also definitely foreshadowing Rook’s Rest.

I’m not sure I like Helaena’s scene. I read comments that she’s hyper-rationalizing as a coping method, but that doesn’t come across the screen well. I think it’s because Helaena isn’t getting the screentime necessary to convey a lot of this stuff, so we have to resort to BTS commentary to get confirmation that yes, Helaena does actually mourn Jaehaerys, she hasn’t just moved on after a few days.

I enjoyed the vulnerability that Aegon shows during his armor fitting, and his discourse with Larys. I don’t necessarily like Larys, nor do I like him manipulating (?) Aegon, but it’s fun to watch.

I can understand Aegon’s thought process to go out with The Boyz as his own coping mechanism, but like many things this season, it’s thanks to the acting. TGC’s face shows a series of emotions as Aegon realizes what a mess he’s in, then ultimately he decides he might as well go out on the town to get a semblance of normalcy. Without that degree of acting, it would be easy to dismiss Aegon as not caring about anything.

It was fun to follow Ulf’s perspective on the streets of KL. His dialogue was a bit clunky because the writers are trying to set up the dragonseed plot. He and Hugh are going to be an interesting pair to watch, with show!Hugh being the serious guy while Ulf is the clown.

No surprise here, but the brothel scene definitely gave me a lot of emotions. 🥲 I like to think sober!Aegon wouldn’t have been as much of an ass to Aemond, after all the times that Aegon has indicated he’s strongly relying on Aemond and Vhagar. Alas, Aegon was very drunk and said a lot of things he shouldn’t have said. Ewan also had phenomenal face-acting in this scene, where you could see him going from horrified and embarrassed to Stone Cold Badass™️.

HOWEVER. If the E4 leak I’ve heard is true, that Aemond tries to kill Aegon because of this brothel scene, I’m gonna be very pissed. We got a scene in E2 where Aemond says he regrets killing Luke…and now he’s gonna kill his own brother in cold blood? 🧐

Septa Rhaenyra… I’m sorry, but this whole sequence was unintentionally hilarious to me. The whole idea is kinda ridiculous. If you forget for a moment that Luke and Jaehaerys are dead, the scene with Alicent and Rhaenyra gives the vibes of two former besties having a spat over something unserious. Honestly I might use it as inspiration for some Alicent and Rhaenyra interactions in my fics, but the big difference is that nobody’s kids have been murdered (yet?) in my fics.

Overall, E3 was a setup episode for future episodes, so it feels like nothing much happened. I’ll still be here next week for E4, but I’ll probably be grumbling about the writing again. 💀

[nothorses]

it’s disheartening how many people will throw around “theyfab” around without realizing how truscummy it sounds like

first time i heard the term it sounded like something a transphobe or terf would say, so why are trans people using the term for other trans people?

I mean, for the same reasons truscum exist, tbh. At least in my experience it's a reaction to people who- in their eyes- are cis girls using she/they pronouns and changing nothing else, as an excuse to Claim The Trans Experience and/or Avoid Accountability For Transphobia.

Which like... okay. I have certainly felt this way in the past (pretty exclusively about one person who came out as trans but indicated no desire to change literally anything- pronouns included- immediately after I suggested they might be doing something transphobic), but regardless of how obvious that assumption seems when you line up all the facts in a row, at the end of the day it's just... not an assumption anyone gets to make.

Sure, maybe there are people out there who claim labels to avoid accountability when they've done harm to those communities. And that sucks! Y'know, if it's actually true.

But the only reason that works in the first place is because of this "listen to [marginalized group] voices!" thing that started as good-faith encouragement to seek out perspectives from the relevant groups on the relevant issues, and has morphed into a practice of waving around victim statuses so you'll be allowed to shut down and punish anyone who disagrees with you on anything.

If you're willing to accept that even trans people can be transphobic, and understand that that hearing or deferring to one individual's perspective does not make you an expert on a topic, this isn't a problem in the first place.

But most of the people who feel threatened by "theyfabs" aren't willing to accept those things; particularly those who fling around half-baked "theories" about how transmascs are just "theyfabs" trying to Invade Trans Spaces.

After all, the whole argument against "transandrophobia" is fueled by the idea that only one group of trans people can matter at a time- and the fear that the (extremely relative, essentially meaningless) "power" of being able to Have The Final Say on trans issues & immunity against accusations of hurting other people is being taken away from them.

[yonemurishiroku]

Have you seen Mark Oshiro's AMA a few hours ago?? Apparently the preview is a draft they wrote as an audition of sorts for Rick. No one has guessed...at LEAST the second half of the book's plot yet. Also we're getting both Will & Nico's POV- and apparently Will was the harder character for Mark to write, because Rick seems to have a very specific idea of what he wanted to do with him. Much to think about

First, I'm so sorry for marinating your ask anon pls do know that it's nothing personal. actually it is. it's me and my goldfish memory. I'm the problem.

Anywayyyyyy----I'm aware of the fact that the preview is a draft now (which is... not quite a clever move btw, but eh). I hope it gets better in the official publication because otherwise, I'd be disheartened. I guess it can't be helped though. It's two authors instead of the usual Rick and try as he may, Mark shouldn't be faulted for their writing style. But again, it's not like I can control my feelings.

Regarding the last half of the book, I'm having huge expectations for it since, ya know, Uncle was being so bold about it. Again, I hope I wouldn't end up with a broken heart.

About Will, so far I have yet to form a coherent, completed image of him due to the lack of canon materials, so I'm pretty pleased to learn that Rick has specific ideas for him.

I'd hold nothing against him if Rick doesn't, btw, not every single character needs a detailed, fully filled-out background sheet for them to work well into the story. And if you ask me, I'm contented with Nico's boyfriend being a secondary character. It probably has something to do with me vs protagonists

With that being said, Will with his distinguished characterization is enthralling just the same. I'm quite curious as to how Rick's gonna build Will - considering the fandom has done an excellent job of it. The fanon Will is like a religion at this point. Many new canon materials turn out to be common in fanon. I'm a little concerned fr the official tbh lolol

It would be extremely disappointing in the unfortunate event that Rick fails, yet if he manages to surprise, I do believe it would be astounding to watch. Let us believe.

[simlicious]

I am not posting much atm, here is why

heya, I'm pretty quiet on the posting front at the moment. This has several reasons. Since this might come across as a bit whiny, feel free to skip this personal ramble.

The good stuff first: I made a pact with my best friend and now we take a long walk together every week to increase our fitness levels. It encourages me to leave the house and get some fresh air and be in nature and it feels very good! We actually did a lot more together in the last months than just the walk, so I am quite busy and also often exhausted from the activity. I have also gotten back into Anno 1800 now that the game has reached its final state, and I am fixing some old mods that are not available anymore but I cannot live without, and I am also working on some of my own mods. The reason why I am taking a break from making patterns has mainly to do with the negative feelings I developed in the last months. I have been putting off writing this post for weeks, but my feelings have not gone away and I want to address this particular issue. Tbh, I often get aggravated when viewing my dash these days. I'm not the most emotionally stable person and my self-worth comes also from external sources, like feedback for my patterns, which is not ideal, but it is what it is right now. Lately, I feel that as a creator of recolorable patterns, I am being pushed deep into a corner. I've always considered myself a niche creator, catering to patterns kinda does that! But I feel like I am becoming obsolete, now that a lot of creators only make Sims 4 conversions and are usually not fully recolorable. I also fear that more and more creators will forget/will never learn how to make clothes and objects recolorable if all they do is add non-recolorable Sims 4 presets. I consider the Create-A-Style tool to be the most important feature of TS3 (together with open worlds). It is such a unique feature, and it breaks my heart to see that not being valued as such. I feel like we should celebrate that, and I try to with my patterns, but it's just so hard to keep it up when most creators do not seem to particularly care anymore. I wish more creators would make the good old Frankenmeshes 😥 I would love to see more ts3 and ts4 frankenmesh mashups. Creators would need to learn how to turn Sims 4 textures into greyscale ones and step up their uv-mapping game a bit, and then it could be a thing... There could even be an open library of recolorable sims 4 textures and remapped meshes that all creators could contribute to. That way, creators could use them and would not need to remake every texture from scratch by themselves. Over time, that would greatly decrease the effort that would need to be put in to make new creations this way... I know that most of you follow me because you really value my patterns and use them in your games, and I know that people who play mainly with vanilla content won't have that problem at all, as 99% the EA stuff can be recolored. But it's just that I see those non-recolorable conversions everywhere on my dash, and it is so disheartening. I guess as a creator, I want to feel welcome in the TS3 creator community, and lately, I do not feel particularly seen or valued as a member of that group. Maybe my Tumblr bubble has shoved me somewhat outside of the group that I would feel more valued in? Maybe I need to adjust my dash. But I do not want to unfollow everyone who posts these conversions. They are nice in their own right, it's just that I can't handle them very well right now. How do you deal with stuff that you do not want to see? do you unfollow people, do you block tags? I've been mostly avoiding my dash, but that does not seem like a good solution. If you post gameplay pics with my patterns or are a creator that makes their stuff CAS-Tool compatible, feel free to tell me below so I can follow you. Just seeing more people use my patterns would probably lift my spirits!

[cuteciboulette]

1/2 NaNo - update

(I like that it can both be read as "half" and as "Heero/Duo", lol.)

I'm off on a pretty, if inconsistent, start. One month is a long distance run and we're only 4 days in but it is pretty encouraging so far (what is disheartening is that I'm only half way through chapter 2 ^^; )

As expected, I already need to revise my early outline and will most likely have to split chapters 2 and 3 into 2 chapters each because everything moves more wordly than first anticipated...

So revised estimate is about 10 chapters (instead of 7) + 1 epilogue. No way half a NaNo will be enough, which is what worries me the most tbh, especially because I know I'll only feel confident to start publishing when the first full draft is be written down as I keep going back to chap 1 and change details about the first info Heero and Wufei collect about "the ghastly affair". I am expecting to realize right at the end that, wait, no, actually that doesn't make sense, I need to change that in the very beginning! v.v

I'm also considering asking for a second opinion early on because writing a mystery is *hard* (especially when it's not what interest me the most in the story! XD) and I just don't know if I'm super obvious with where I'm going or on the contrary subtle. I don't really care if the readers guess the plot but I am concerned that I'm making Heero and Wufei stupid in my fear of not having them to jump to conclusions out of fine air >.< My thought is that if I'm making them too dumb, I probably should work on it NOW rather than 6 chapters in...

Anyway, word count!

notes: 1. yes, I'm absolutely counting the words I wrote 1h prior to midnight on Oct 31st because I can 2. as I'm stopping the counts at midnight and as I'm mostly writing at night, the count is pretty confusing (even to me!) as every day I write both for "today" and "tomorrow". It's already 11 pm here so not sure I'll add words to today's count but I will probably for tomorrow (aka words written today after midnight)

[daisyvisions]

assuming you've already been made aware probably, but just in case

https://www.tumblr.com/thetypingpup/764075091731562496/ok-theyve-deactivated-but-jasminexo5xuhuihuis?source=share

First of all, thank you so much for bringing this to my attention anon. You are truly a real one for this.

(Long message ahead, if you wanna skip I don't mind but TLDR, a close moot of mine turned out to be a minor)

Okay, so some of y'all have been around my blog long enough and aware enough to know that I have mentioned @/jasminexox or @/jasminexo5 or later known as @/xuhuihuis. I'm gonna save everyone the trouble by saying that apparently it was discovered that she was a minor and has been lying about her age and her life (to those who've gotten close to her).

Some might think she was a new blog here but I've known jasmine since 2022 and not once was I aware that she was a minor, which tbh I feel incredibly disappointed because I've dedicated parts of my day to chatting to her when we were close, I've given her ideas for some fics or how to start writing more, I've shared my own thoughts and ideas for fics and it just guts me knowing she was probably 14/15? absolutely disheartening.

For a long time I knew she was lying about her life, tbh it was pretty obv because her stories never added up, but me being me I thought "maybe she doesn't want to reveal her personal life here and just uses aliases" which is completely valid! But as time went on we didn't talk as much and my energy was going to my tbz friend group. and when I saw the label in my chat with her here that she was deactivated the only thing that crossed my mind was "I hope she's alright" but now knowing it was because her lies were discovered, it just placed the final nail to the coffin on what I've felt about her over the past years.

What makes me even more sad, gutted, disappointed is the fact that sharing ideas with her when I was just a new reader with no friends on Tumblr actually sparked my interest in writing. If I didnt talk to her, or share ideas with her, I don't even think my blog would've existed at all, and I would've never met the lovely people and my close friends. The weight of this thought has on me really fucking sucks. It really does.

Her lying about her life I couldn't really give a fuck, anyone can do it here, but to lie about her age, to rope in innocent people who genuinely thought you were of age and could confide in you as a friend, a peer, and ultimately question their own moral compass as adults after knowing this truth is sickening.

As an adult, who writes smut on here, there is only so much I can do to prevent minors from reading whatever I post. I can prevent, block, tell them to not read but at the end of the day, if they have the conscience to lie, they have the conscience to do the bare minimum and read blogs that say "MINORS DO NOT INTERACT". So if you're a minor and you're reading this right now, be smart and unfollow / block me. You know better.

Now that I've said my peace, the only question remains... will I still continue this blog after knowing a partial reason as to why I started it to begin with was because of her? Answer is yes, because my love for tbz and writing as a means of creative expression were not inspired from her but from my own thoughts, conversing with her (and her being a writer) only placed that thought in my head. I will still write for tbz until time tells me it's time to stop.

But now, I want to set things right and be a better example on here as an adult so these are the things I will do immediately:

Delete any mentions of her because I don't want that fucking name on any of my fics or asks. I rest easier not seeing her @ (but to those who've reblogged those posts and still see her name through reblogs dont come after me for that please Tumblr doesn't update reblogs sadly).

Rewrite my disclaimer about minors on here. My current one is straight to the point and I can only do so much to prevent minors from entering, but because of this I will make it more clear about my warnings.

IF I have the time, to block ageless and bot blogs. To be honest it is very hard for me to find the time but I will try my best, no guarantees but for now, a really important disclaimer will do (hopefully...)

And if anyone spots minors on my blogs, I encourage you to DM or send an ask, and I will quickly block the blog idc if you like my shit, you're not supposed to be here to begin with.

Final note, I hope those who were even more affected by jasmine's actions will be okay, Im aware there were even some who got to know her more and even helped her out in her own writing (just as I did with her). Please know you were not the only one who was lied to and I hope that you take enough time to heal from this.

[theodore-lasso]

All this current talk about fic and pseudonyms and the Ted Lasso fandom has really brought up something that happened to me last year and I feel like it might be useful to talk about it openly. (Heads up this is long so start scrolling if you don't care abt this fandom wank)

CW discussion of sexual assault and rape in fic

I wrote a fic last year that just based on the pairing being Nate/Keeley, I knew would be controversial. Here is that fic. I didn’t want any drama that came along with it associated with me or my writing and I wanted to feel more free and less confined by (what I’ve found to be in this fandom) very strict rules about how you portray sex, kink, and consent in fic, so I made a new AO3 account to post it. By the way it is tagged as Nate/Keeley (I would assume you wouldn’t read a pairing you weren’t interested in), and it’s Explicit which means you have to consent to view it.

The first couple of replies I got were pretty disheartening but not unexpected, you can still read them on the original fic, but even when I clarified that as the author I didn’t intend for this to be sexual assault, and therefore why I didn’t tag it as such, I got this comment (I’m keeping everything anon in this post)

And tbh this comment was pretty devastating to get and at this point I already didn’t want to bother writing any more rarepairs or “controversial” pairings, and I didn’t want to write anything that might stir the pot at all. I wanted to hide behind the pseudonym. Also - I don’t really think it’s about the content of my fic but that this is considered an appropriate response at all. But y’know what we’d agreed to disagree (even though it sucked) and I was moving on with my life and logging out of that account.

But then, like the next day, I woke up to find this. Which I’m not going to link because it’s not mine

But yeah look getting a response fic posted and having it be a post-rape comfort fic written on anon so there was no way for me to discuss this with the author, it was maybe the worst fandom experience I’ve ever had. You ask why people don’t write kinkier or darker or more challenging fics and why people stick to light genre-appropriate tones. This is what happens when people step out of line. If the fandom would actually learn “hey this isn’t for me, I will leave it alone” maybe we would have more expansive types of fic, but until we learn that I think we’re unfortunately going to stick with the fic we have. The comments alone? They sucked, I personally thought they were a little out of line, but I was happy to just get over it because people who did understand my intent read it and commented too. But having a whole fic written on a pretty harmful misinterpretation of my fic? That’s new

I know this was a long post, but I just think that this is a good example of why people Don’t write certain things, and what actually is happening when they do, because I know a lot of people don’t see what’s happening. If I *had* been a completely new author to the fandom like everyone thought when I was posting on a brand new account, there's no fucking way I would've come back.

[neighborlywelcome]

i haven't actually gotten into welcome home so i think this would be interesting... and might encourage me to finally get into the series lol

can i get a platonic matchup for welcome home? in person i'm very shy, polite, quiet and. awkward tbh but in text i'm waaay different. confident, a jokester, and mischievous. i love messing with people. sometimes that mischievous side of me slips out into irl which surprises people

i love birds. and baking. and music. and video games i love playing games with people

i also have issues with missing home/not having a home which. idk if that's a theme in welcome home? cuz. Welcome *Home*. it might not be worth mentioning but if there's a character that mourns the past i will 100% relate to them.

thank you :)

No problem! If you do want to get into Welcome Home, the website can seem intimidating with how much has been added to it but try not to be disheartened! Take it at your own pace and discover things naturally, or look up a guide if that’s more your speed! (I’d personally recommend looking through the main pages first before clicking all the little drawings/bugs to help get an understanding of the project first.)

Anyways onto the matchup!

YOUR (PLATONIC) MATCHUP IS…

JULIE!!!

Julie is a good match for you to be friends with because, personality-wise, you're very different! Julie's best friend is Frank, who's grumpy and her exact opposite, so I imagine she likes people who are more quiet and shy to balance her out.

Of course, Julie can also be a trickster so she appreciates your mischievous nature when you're more open to her! Julie's favorite thing to do is play games she's made up with rules she forgets to follow, so that's a fun activity for you two to do together (as long as you can keep up with her)!

If you ever do feel more shy and awkward around her, though, Julie will be sure to make you feel at home. You can do more quiet activities together too, like styling each others' hair (she has lots of it, so that's always a chore!) or completing crosswords and such!

Julie is also very enthusiastic about your other interests. Music and baking? As long as you two can make a game out of it, she'd love to play! Fair warning, though, she isn't the best baker in the world but she's spent enough time around Frank and Poppy to know her way around a kitchen!

Julie left behind her home in the caves to move to the neighborhood. She's the only one of her four siblings to leave home, so she probably gets pretty lonely and homesick. Knowing that, you two would be good at comforting each other when Home doesn't feel like home because you can really understand one another in that aspect, and Julie probably misses her family more than she lets on.

A little note about the above: Missing home/not having a home is heavily implied to be an upcoming theme in Welcome Home. Many of Home's denizens moved there from other places and are probably going to have a complicated relationship with the concept of home itself. It'll be interesting to see how each of the characters develop and grow to find a home, for sure!

[luthwhore]

Waaay too late to the party, wanted to write back when you made the post about the twitter thread complaining about possibility of Lex being redeemed and forgot 70% of what I was gonna say, but I agree. Beyond personal preference, my argument is that the big part of the character and his dynamic has always been the "You could've used your genius for good" tragedy, and that just doesn't work if he's written as the evilest man on Earth. Might as well talk how sad it is Darkseid ain't running a utopia. I get how that can get unfomfortable with "He's a BAD billionare instead of a good one, which would be the best thing ever", but I think it can just as easily be framed as "he chose to be a billionare instead of a scientist"-hell, the vigilante thing fits into that pretty well!

exactly!! and tbh the fact that lex isn't an irredeemable monster is honestly one of the most interesting things about him? lex seems himself as a hero and he wants to do good, but ultimately his own ego usually ends up getting in the way of it, because he's usually more concerned about how other people perceive him than the actual effects of his actions.

there are also only so many stories you can tell that are "superman vs a super evil guy who has a lot of money and keeps buying his way out of trouble" and eventually, it's going to get boring and repetitive, esp bc it's disheartening to see superman lose over and over again.

his story is far more interesting, imo, when there is some kind of emotional stake for superman. when you have a superman who sees a sliver of good in lex, no matter how small. that's part of why i like seeing stories where lex is contrasted with the joker, because lex -- at least when written well -- has standards and isn't usually interested in harming civilians.

(probably the thing that will make me groan and tune out of a lex story faster than anything is seeing him referred to as "a sociopath", both bc i feel like it's a gross misrepresentation of his character, and because I'm personally really tired of seeing personality disorders tossed around as pejoratives.)

i think it's also very telling that -- at least in my observations -- people who care deeply about superman lore tend to prefer pre-crisis and superman: birthright lex over the byrne-era, whereas most people who want lex to just be the evil CEO -- or worse, who want him to be "updated" into just being a musk parody -- tend not to be people who actually read his comics or engage with superman lore in any meaningful way.

there's a reason, imo, that most superman content from the 2000s onward has been trying to retcon lex to be either closer to his pre-crisis iteration or closer to smallville, and that's bc those are the versions of the character people actually... you know... like.

[snortoborto]

Ik this is the only place that anyone will care about my musings about (super culturally relevant in 2024) musical Dear Evan (Hansen).

Idk anyway, it's not really ever been one of my favorites per say, and I know the time has passed, but, I kinda wanna talk about Connor Murphy. (These are all just my takes as someone who likes musicals but doesn't participate in like, musical fandom.)

I think it's very obvious that Evan is supposed to be a pretty relatable character, because of his struggle with mental illness. Feeling anxious and unsure of ourselves, especially in relation to other people, is a feeling we've all experienced, especially a lot of teenagers. That feeling of isolation leading Evan to an attempt, is really raw and resonates with a lot of people. Still, the narrative shows us all of Evan, messy or not. He's young, he's mentally ill, he's human. He makes mistakes that end up hurting people, and we see that all. But I ultimately believe that the narrative eventually portrays him in a very human, forgiving light, by the end. He's a kid who made mistakes. He's well rounded and ultimately sympathetic, while still flawed and uncomfortable. I like that.

I wish Connor got the same grace tbh. All we know about him, the REAL Connor, is that he's a troubled kid, who's perpetually stoned, and nothing more than a bother to his family. He's mentally ill, just like Evan, but where Evan failed an attempt, Connor succeeded. Where I see a difference is in the way their mental illnesses surface, in terms of behavior. Being mentally ill isolates both boys, but in a different way.

Evan closes himself off. He's passive and shy, but has a mom who's constantly trying to be there to encourage him and provide for him. Connor's mental illness surfaces in a different way. He's violent. He's angry. He copes by using drugs. His mental illness is not quiet, does not present passively, and his family rejects him because of that. Even his mom, who wants to love him, only can once Evan presents a version of Conner that wasn't so difficult. Connor is too messy to get the understanding he deserves.

The way that Connor essentially has his voice and expirences taken from him, and softened, sanitized (by Evan) in order to finally gain acceptance from his family and peers is genuinely fucking crushing. The way he couldn't be loved as the person he was, because his coping mechanisms were taboo and his mental illness wasn't docile enough for understanding, kills me fr.

I'm not really sure how much of this is actually planned, thematic commentary, but, just the fact that Connor isn't even THE REAL CONNOR for most of the events of the plot (just Evan's idea of him) feels so fucking sad. Yeah, sure, sad for Evan that this is his only shot at friendship, but mostly sad for Connor that he could never be loved as he was, even by his own family, and only in death, was he sanitized enough to win sympathy and understanding.

He wasn't worthy of love or help when he had loud, violent, ugly mental health episodes. Or when he was using drugs and self medicating on a daily basis, cause all that stuff is uncomfortable. That's the ugly side of mental illness. His family didn't help him, they pushed him away and labeled him as a monster, unworthy of support. The fact that the only thing that softed Connor's family to him was a classmate completely rewriting his life, to make it more palatable is so disheartening.

It makes me wish that the focus was more on Connor and his family, that we got to spend more time with him. Some people are mentally ill in a way that's socially permissible, and some people are simply too sick, so we might as well just treat them like the bad people they were born to be.

Evan does (obviously, it's the whole point of the show) grapple with his actions, caused by mental illness. He finds himself acting immorality and being manipulative, but he's allowed that space to make mistakes. He has to opportunity to learn and begin on his path to forgiveness. Not Connor. He's already too far gone.

His mental illness isn't quiet. It doesn't make him act meek or anxious, like Evan. It makes him violent and angry and I can't help but feel like the narrative is punishing him for that. For having ugly symptoms that hurt people, most of all, himself. I can't help but feel like the way that Evan took full control of Connor's voice in order to make him more manageable is like a condemnation of who Connor was in life. Same with making his family hate him. I feel like I'm being told that this kid was a burnout piece of shit, not worth being remembered for who he was, but Evan's heart is in the right place by trying to whitewash his life, for the comfort of the family that rejected him.

Obviously the point of the show is that what Evan did was wrong, but it's wrong because he lied to his crush and her family, not because he took Connor's voice for his own, when Connor deserved to keep that agency for himself. It's framed as wrong cause he lied to the family, not because he spoke over someone who suffered greatly.

I just feel like the narrative really props Evan up as "one of the good ones" who's just lost his way. I feel like it uncritically frames Connor as a lost cause, scumbag who's family (especially his sister) are right to feel the way they do about him. Its almost framed as like, a fool's errand that Evan wants to clean up Connor's image, post death, and the narrative confirms this by never really giving the real Connor any humanizing moments. He doesn't have the right kind of mental illness to be sympathetic to an audience.

At the core of Evan's wrongdoing is deceiving Connor's family and the public for personal gain. It's the feelings of Connor's family (who hated him) that are the ultimate concern. Connor, himself, hardly even matters. I'm not sure if that's intentional or not, but it still feels...dismissive and malicious towards anyone who has a more stigmatized form, or outward expression, of mental illness. It feels like saying: "here are the traits of mental illness that you're allowed to have and can heal from," whatever Evan has going on, "but these ones (violence, anger, substance abuse) make you a lost cause and justify your family and peers hating you."

There's so much there with Conner as a character. So much wasted potential. Idk, I just always imagine the narrative from his side whenever I re-listen to the soundtrack. Cause I'm not an Evan, in terms of how mental illness has affected my life and relationships. I'm a Connor.

[kthecutest]

hii girl <3 it's me !

how was your day? i hope you're doing well, make sure to stay hydrated and that you've eaten plenty of food :)

i read your fic 'tiny light' and all I have to say is it's a very wonderful and lovely story, your writing is so pretty, even. the format is somewhat unique and it felt like a storybook which i actually adore since i love fairytale books w all my heart. especially the song is actually my favourite too haha <3

i actually teared up w the ending lol 😭😭

and i get it that it can be disheartening and discouraging to get less than u expected, but i guess it is what it is in this hellsite. most stans regardless of any fandom tend to mostly read smut, and it's nothing wrong since it's not like we don't read them too lol. but stories that don't contain smut, or contain less smut will pretty much have a hard time to gain interactions.

and that's the hard part.

since like, you can compare it with people nowadays liking fast food—anything fast and consumable which is once again not wrong, but the world just moves pretty quickly and the sayings always be like "to adapt."

but in writing, there's no need to feel like you have to often write smut just because there are less interactions. i mean, if you love to write stories without smut sometimes then follow your wishes bc i think that's the most important thing.

bc guess what, i actually cried so hard this year on feb because my story didn't gain the amount of likes i expected and that rlly hurt me to the point i went to create an anon ask to my favourite writer, and she created a whole paragraph which i appreciated alot but one thing that stood out to me the most is,

"keep writing, write what you love and one day you'll find your own tribe. but even if you don't find them, hey atleast you're still loving what you're doing and isn't that the most wonderful thing?"

it's a lie to say that i still don't expect likes or any form of interactions until now, but i've gradually worked on them that they don't affect me much anymore bc the most important thing for me now is to let out the story i wanted to tell, to perfect my craft and yk just put my story out there for people to find out and read someday like finding a treasure in the midst of the forest someday.

just like yours!

just like the title, i'm sure your story brings a special tiny light of its own, and will definitely touch some people's heart that might encounter it someday like future lunés. cuz i believe it would, i mean most of not all writers are often inspired by other writers as well! but until then, write whatever and however you please <3

tiny light was a birthday gift isn't? that's a very sweet and pure effort honestly, and i think kei would totally totally love it too 💚 a whole fic dedicated to him, a werewolf and a witch—it's just so lovely to think about. I'm sure he would say, "thank you for your hard work and effort!" with the 'k' sign, :))

i was thinking maybe one day if you'd like to make it into just a little fairytale book (excluding the smut lol), imagine that someday there's a huge chance that kei's children would read it and completely love it. imagine him reading your stories to them before they sleep?

i apologise for the long paragraph, i don't rlly talk often but i feel like i just have to say this. i don't want to have regrets hehe <3 your writing is wonderful, and i believe you will only get better on your craft everyday and along with that just have fun writing stories you want 💚

have a good day yūka, you did well and take lots of rest! 💚💚💚

omggg I just saw this as soon as I came out of my 4 hour exam room and I'm tearing up so badly (இ///இ`｡)

tbh about the situation with 'tiny light' ig i wasn't exactly disheartened but i was just a bit bothered. But at the end of the day, i understand how the algorithm and the balance in this community works so it's okay (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

Your long message really made my day (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ) Thank you so much Yuan-san, you're always so kind and elegant with your words (இ///இ`｡) Ty for being so supportive and having my back TT

.∧,,,∧ ∧,,,∧ ( ̳• · • ̳)( ̳• · • ̳ ) / づC \

I hope you have an amazing day too! Make sure to stay hydrated and take care! ε(´｡•᎑•`)っ 💚💚

[sithisreadingcorner]

Hi again! I hope life's treating you well. I would like to request a free August reading from you if possible. The last one really helped me a lot. My initials are A.P/Agnes 🦜 and i was born on 26.08.96. Im in a pretty tough spot in life right now. There's a lot of crappy things happening and i would like to ask for some life guidance from my spirit guides. Or just a general reading is fine too. Thank you in advance and have a beautiful day! 🍀

I'm so sorry to hear that you are going through such a rough time! I really hope this reading will give you something to work with. Let's see what your spirit guides have to say. (I'm also noticing that your birthday was just very recently, happy birthday! I will make this as detailed as I can!)

knight of swords. queen of wands (indulgent) the star (dream). three of swords

The things that have been happening to you have broken you down terribly, which I'm really sad to see but not surprised about. But other than that, they have also made you kind of... stagnant. I think you are in a position where you just kind of stand by while the things are happening to you. I'm absolutely sure none of the bad things that happened to you were your fault or did you even have a hand in them, so it wasn't like you could have done anything about those particular situations. But from the cards that I'm seeing here, your guides are trying to draw your attention from the fact that in other ways you have a TON of agency and you've become so apathetic that you are willingly giving it up. 😔

I want you to think of this differently. What has happened to you, is unfair, and it hurts. And that will maybe keep hurting, from some time coming. This is okay, and valid. But laying down and staying in that emotion, however valid it may be, is not good for you right now. There are a lot of things that you can't control in your life, but there are also some things that you CAN and the more you keep focusing on those, the easier the feeling will become.

There is something about the knight of swords that the booklet describes as the "flash of opportunity". There are tiny opportunities whooshing past you on a daily, or at the very least weekly, basis, but they are extremely small and brief and therefore hard to see their significance. So you let them pass by, because you are not looking, and this is really disheartening for your guides to see. Let me just say an example off the top of my head, just to illustrate it. You lose your job, and struggle to find another. You are interviewed for a position that you perceive as your dream job, but you don't get it. Then, it's easy to lose yourself in misery and do nothing. But what you are not seeing behind the scenes, is that there is a job ad somewhere online at this very moment that would happily hire you on the spot if you only applied. So, what you do, is wallow in your misery, A LITTLE BIT. And then go out and send another application. 💗

I also pulled a fortune cookie in the meantime and it says: "You should think of yourself every once in a while." Which reminds me of another very important point that I almost forgot to add. I think you need something new in your life that you create for yourself as a happy space. I don't know what it is, and it probably doesn't matter actually. Like starting a new sport, retrying a craft that you enjoyed in your childhood... I think this can be anything as long as it gives you a feeling of accomplishment. If you only have 10 minutes a day to spend on it, or just one hour a week, doesn't matter, but you must do it anyway. The most important thing is that this is a YOU party where no one else is invited. It doesn't need to accomplish anything special other than giving you an outlet and making you feel like you have the power to change things. You will see, that as your thinking changes, the way you view yourself and the world will change, and then your actions, and with that your situation will change as well.

Tbh this feels like a self-contained reading but I wanted to see if your guides have some kind of more concrete advice for you what to do next, but I wanted to do that from a different deck.

LXVII. THE STONE

"[...] A single stone may see thousands of generations come and go; therefore it contains an ancient and eternal presence. The stone is best to anchor our wild side, so no matter how far we roam, we can always find our way back. [...]"

LXII. THE SWORD

"To use the sword is to decide. [...] This weapon requires a clear and decisive mind and a willingness to act. [...] Decisions shape our life, and the sword is an infamous shaper of destiny."

LII. THE TEAR

"Tears are droplets of letting go. Once they begin to fall, we allow the swelling tide of emotion to run its elemental course. [...]"

You know, I think this is almost the same thing that I was saying earlier, but there is also a difference here. What is coming through, is a message of tough love. And I don't mean that your guides are mad at you or anything, rather: it's time for an era where you give that tough love to yourself. If you stop attaching yourself to your pain and tying yourself down with/to it, and instead confront it hands on, you are not making in any less valid - in fact you are honoring it. You cannot stay here forever. And if you do nothing new, nothing will change. It's time for you to really begin to heal, and start something new. 🥰

I hope this will help Agnes! And please let me know what you think of the reading! 💗 I'm recording the accuracy of my readings for a project, so for an honest review I would be super grateful 🙏

august readings (3 of 5)

tips? 💗