#because its called 'dicks out for the void' or something

[shixcherie]

Damsel In Stress | Jeong Yunho & Song Mingi ☆

~ ~ call me chérie ☆

Navigation | Kinktober List

☆ Day 04 : Bodyguards, Shower Sex

↬ [ Synopsis ] : When your bodyguards, devilishly handsome and undeniably sexy, promise you a night to remember, you take it all in stride. Whether it’s bending the rules or indulging in steamy shower sex, you’re ready to embrace the thrill, surrendering yourself completely to the experience.

Word Count : 3.9k Genre : Smut, Angst, Bodyguard Au. Pairing : Bodyguard! Yunho x F.Reader x Bodyguard! Mingi

WARNINGS : Pure smut, shower sex, double penetration, dom/sub undertones, multiple orgasms, praise, petnames ( doll and princess), playful banter and flirting, big dick agenda, mention of alchol and drug consumption.

Tag list OPEN! - let me know if you want to be tagged for this Kinktober list

☆☆☆ NOTE : Day 4 is here, and this is huge just like our handsome boys, Yunho and Mingi. :P . Hope you enjoy this ma chéries. This story contains themes related to alcohol and drug use. Reader discretion is advised.

“Yunho, ahh... keep going, please don’t stop” you cried as Yunho mercilessly pounded deep into you, his thrusts turning your brain to mush. “So good, princess, taking us so well.”

Us? Did he just say “US”?

“Is this what you wanted, doll?” Mingi's deep voice purred from behind, sending a shiver down your spine. “Feels good, doesn’t it… being taken care of like this?” His words heightened the sensation of being at the mercy of your two deliciously handsome bodyguards.

As you pieced together the situation, it felt messy, thrilling, and was definitely going to be hard to explain to your daddy.

Wait… how did you end up here?

Let’s rewind a bit.

—

Your friends called you “Damsel In Distress” for being daddy’s little princess, constantly getting saved by him and your bodyguards Yunho and Mingi and being the mischievous talk of the town. Causing trouble was not something you chose to indulge in voluntarily; it was just that wherever you went, trouble followed you like a loyal dog following its master.

Coming from an opulent family didn’t help either, because people loved to pick on someone who had everything that they didn’t and couldn’t have. Taking behind your back, purposely messing up your drinks to see daddy’s little princess act crazy, and snatching your boyfriend Mingyu were a few things that you had been dealing with for the past six months. With your best friends turning their backs on you, your situation got a thousand times worse. Bullying turned into actual harassment, and this daddy’s little princess went feral.

Up until a point, you did tolerate it; you got your dead mom’s patience after all. You didn’t want anything from a woman who cheated on your S-tier, greenest of the green flag, ultra pro max gentleman daddy, but fate had a way of shoving things down your throat that you didn’t want to be associated with at all. Hence, you were a spitting image of your mom, but the good thing was you got your dad’s behavior and morals, making you the most loyal person you would ever meet.

You were more like a “Damsel In Stress” after multiple failed relationships and a damaged reputation in university. The only people you could gawk at without getting labeled as a “creep” were your handsome bodyguards, Yunho and Mingi. Tall and handsome with Greek god-ish builds, they made anything in their vicinity appear minuscule, and your 5’3” tall frame didn’t help much.

But where your height lacked, you made up for it with your attitude (short girlies for the win). The last six months were the most nightmarish months of your whole freaking life; getting addicted to substances, smoking weed, and sneaking out at late hours to attend God knows what kind of parties became your choice of escape. Your only option.

These were the only things that somehow filled the empty void, hence your daddy decided to ignore it for a while, as long as you were safely back home at dawn, and Yunho and Mingi, being the most dutiful and uptight bodyguards, made sure of it.

Tonight was different, though.

Why? Because you met this girl online, her name’s Ryujin.

You both clicked instantly, shared similar past troubles, and were freshly single, addicted to drugs. You girlies had been planning a getaway to spend a wild night out.

Ryujin found this party happening a few hours' drive from your mansion, kinda illegal with everything from dangerous drugs to premium liquor available, but promising a wild night.

You needed that.

Hence, you sneaked out again without anyone noticing, not even your bodyguards. You sneakily tranquilized their drinks, hehe, not advisable, but kinda the need of the hour.

Then how did this perfectly well-planned night take such an unexpected turn?

You were here to forget all your sorrows, so why were you lying on the cold tiles of the bathroom floor, disgusting, your body so limp it felt like you took a thousand fucking punches, not remembering a single thing? The last thing you remembered was Ryujin crying on her knees beside you, fear calling your bodyguards. Yes, they were saved on speed dial just so you could escape out of situations like these without daddy noticing it.

But what happened with you? Did you drink too much? Ingest something so strong that it blacked you the fuck out?

A thousand questions swirled around your mind as darkness took over. You could feel yourself being picked up off the cold and dirty bathroom floor, Ryujin thanking Yunho as he offered to drop her back home, which she declined sweetly, mentioning she could drive back as she had bought her car and had almost sobered up. Fucking traitor! Why call them?!

Wait, Yunho?! What about your drugged drink? Did it not work on them? Who the fuck is carrying you? Is it Mingi? Not complaining at all; you had dreamt of moments like this.

But when—how did they know—why—what the actual motherfucking fuck is this mess?

Yeah, your intoxicated brain couldn’t handle any more, and you passed out.

When the tiniest consciousness slipped into your brain, you opened your eyes to gaze upon the glorious sight in front of you: fine-as-freaking-wine men driving you somewhere.

“What are you guys doing here?” you asked, even if you knew what was going to come your way. “Aren’t you both supposed to be... umm... sleeping?”

It's our job to take care of you.

“It’s our job to look out for you, doll” Mingi replied with a small smile,just the way you expected, his deep voice slightly registering in your intoxicated mind, and huh, did he just call you doll?

“Sleeping? That’s cute. Aren’t you supposed to be in bed by now, princess?” Yunho asked you, a smug look adorning his face, still not answering your question, his sexy smirk visible from the rearview mirror.

What the fuck with these nicknames?

“Guess the dosage wasn’t strong enough, huh?” Mingi chipped in, his handsome frame in the driver’s seat way too distracting for you to register whatever the fuck he said, something along the lines of dosage being strong.

Huh?! You just got caught. Is there a way out of this? Will daddy find out? Will you be punished?

“He-hehe, what dosage are you talking about?” you nervously laughed, thinking of what to say next.

“Can we not play dumb anymore, princess?” Yunho teased, giving you a look that clearly said daddy’s princess just got caught. “Sorry to disappoint you, but boys don’t take naps on the job.” That sealed the deal for you; even the freaking drug betrayed you.

Your lips formed a thin line, your mind made up that any more excuses you planned on coming up with were not going to work on them anymore. You sighed in defeat, earning a chuckle from both of them.

A piercing silence fell over the car, soon replaced by a thick tension that made you shift uncomfortably in your seat, filthy thoughts flickering through your mind like a movie reel.

Was it the sexual frustration building up over the last six months, or the effects of the intoxication? You couldn’t pinpoint it.

But every time you caught Yunho's intense gaze through the rearview mirror, a jolt ran down your spine, heat pooling low in your stomach. His smirk never faltered, his eyes shifting between you and the road, as if he knew exactly what was running through your head.

Mingi, sitting beside him, wasn’t any less subtle. His broad hand casually rested on the steering wheel, but his eyes would drift toward you whenever he thought you weren’t looking. That small smile from earlier still lingered on his lips, making your pulse quicken. You couldn't shake the way his deep voice wrapped around that nickname, “doll”. It felt too intimate, too... dangerous.

Why were your bodyguards acting up today? Was it the aftereffects of the drug, or perhaps... they did feel some kind of way towards you?

So, it wasn’t just you after all, was it? They had been battling with the same thoughts, the same desire simmering beneath the surface. You could feel it—thick in the air, undeniable. A flush creep up your neck, only heightening the tension.

“What’s wrong, princess? Feeling a little too warm?” Yunho teased, his voice laced with amusement as he noticed the way you shifted in your seat again.

You swallowed hard, trying to steady your breathing, but there was no escaping the heat radiating from both of them.

They knew exactly what they were doing to you.

As Mingi turned down a quieter street, the path leading exactly where you feared, their house, your fears were confirmed. Or perhaps, it wasn’t fear at all... but excitement for what was about to come next.

Mingi pulled the car to a stop in front of their house, your pulse quickens heart racing a million miles in equal parts anticipation and fear, as Yunho opened the door for you, his hand reaching out to help you step down. His fingers brushed against your skin, seemingly innocent, but it sent a spark of electricity through your body.

No words were exchanged as they led you inside, the door closing behind you with a soft click. The air was thick with unspoken tension, the kind that had been building for months. You were halfway across the living room when Mingi’s deep voice broke the silence.

“You’re trembling, doll” he murmured, stepping closer. His proximity was intoxicating, and you couldn’t help the way your breath hitched. “Nervous? Or is it something else?”

Before you could respond, Yunho was behind you, his breath hot against your neck as he leaned in. “You didn’t think you could drug us and just walk away, did you, princess?” His voice was low, teasing, and far too close for your mind to stay clear.

You turned to face him, heart hammering, but the words stuck in your throat as Yunho’s eyes darkened. In one swift motion, his lips claimed yours—demanding, taking what had been simmering between you for far too long. His kiss was messy, mind-numbing, filled with hunger. A hunger you hadn’t fully realized, or maybe one you’d knowingly ignored given the forbidden nature of your relationship with them.

Before you could catch your breath, Mingi was there. His hand gently tilted your chin toward him, his lips hovering over yours as he whispered, “We’re not finished with you yet.” The words sent a shiver through you. And before you could process the weight of them, his mouth was on yours—slow, deliberate, and utterly consuming, like he had all the time in the world.

You were experiencing things you had once only dreamed of, especially given the state of desperation you felt a few months ago. Even though you had deliberately ignored the hints Yunho and Mingi dropped, this moment felt like a culmination of all those unspoken desires.

A wave of validation washed over you, filling your heart with satisfaction as you realized that they shared the same hunger and lust that had been simmering within you for so long.The hunger that had been building for months had finally ignited, and there was no turning back.

As Mingi continued to kiss you, Yunho decided to take over your neck, decorating it with butterfly kisses. “You taste so sweet,princess” he murmured, nipping at your skin, urging pretty moans from you that were muffled by Mingi’s skillful lips.

“Is she always this responsive?” Mingi teased, pulling back slightly to glance at you, his eyes dark with desire. “We could get used to this.”

“Don’t let it go to your head” you shot back playfully, but your breath hitched as Yunho continued his trail of kisses.

Purple marks blossomed along your neck as Yunho explored further, nibbling on your earlobe before kissing you behind the ear. “You’re driving me wild,do you know that ?” he whispered, his breath warm against your skin. “We might just want to keep you like this forever.”

“Guess I found your sweet spot” Yunho smirked, oblivious to the way your body reacted as he kept kissing and nibbling that delicate area.

“Mhmm… Yunho… don’t stop” you gasped, earning a chuckle from him at the way his name rolled off your tongue. Your hands tangled in Mingi’s hair as he maintained his steamy kiss.

Mingi pulled back just enough to meet your gaze, his voice low and husky. “Just imagine what else we can do to you, doll.”

“Oh, I’m counting on it” you chuckled softly, meeting his gaze. With a playful smirk, you added, “Have a feeling you two won’t disappoint me.”

Yunho caught your eye, his grin playful. “You have no idea how much we’ve been wanting this, do you?”

With a mischievous glint in your eye, you teased, “I might have had a hint… but now, I want a full demonstration.” It was true, tensions had always heightened between the three of you. But given the restrictions and the lack of loose moments like this, it had kept you from exploring each other,until now.

Mingi leaned closer, his lips brushing against your ear. “Don’t worry, we’ll give you a show you won’t forget.”

Mingi's hands found the hem of your top, pulling it up slowly. “Let me take this off for you,” he murmured, his voice thick with desire as the fabric slipped away, leaving your skin bare to his hungry gaze. His gaze had you wet down south, aching to be touched and devoured.

Yunho stepped closer, his fingers eagerly working on your jeans. “You look incredible, but let’s make it even better, shall we?” he teased, his breath hot against your ear as he slid your jeans down your legs, pooling at your feet.

The cold air making contact with you sent goosebumps all over your body, excitement coursing through you.A faint sound of water running caught your ears—was it the shower? A knowing look spread across your face. Ah, so that’s what these two had been planning.

Quite steamy, you thought, and utterly exciting.

The idea of the three of you under the shower, bodies pressed together, both your holes stuffed to the brim,had your arousal pooling, your core dripping with desire.

“Figured it out already, doll?” Mingi chuckled, a knowing look in his eyes as he glanced toward the bathroom where the water was running.

“Then, princess shall not wait any longer” Yunho added, his voice low and sultry, sending a shiver of anticipation down your spine.

Both of them took your hands, guiding you toward the bathroom. As you stood under the shower, water cascaded down your body, the heat mixing with your own as you surrendered to the moment.

Yunho's hands cupped your breasts, his touch igniting a fire within you. He played with your now-hard nipples as your head rested back on his shoulder, eyes closed, a disheveled mess with your lips caught between your teeth.

Mingi knelt before you, his gaze intense as he admired how the water glistened on your skin. “You’re absolutely breathtaking” he said, his fingers teasingly grazing your inner thighs before moving higher.

Your breath hitched as Mingi's fingers finally found your dripping core, sliding through your folds that left you gasping. “How does that feel, princess?” he asked, looking up at you with a smirk, clearly enjoying your reaction.

“Unbelievably good” you breathed, leaning back against Yunho, who continued to play with your breasts, his thumbs circling your nipples, making them harden under his touch.

Mingi’s fingers skillfully explored your slick heat, swirling and teasing, collecting soft moans from your lips. “Cum for us, doll. Just enjoy this moment with us” he whispered, his voice dripping with seduction as he picked up the pace, each back-and-forth movement driving you wild.

Yunho's hands moved from your breasts to your waist, steadying you as Mingi's fingers worked their magic. The tension within you built, a delicious pressure threatening to consume you.

Yunho’s breath was hot against your ear as he kissed the delicate spot, quickening your heart and serving as the final blow that made everything come undone.

With a soft gasp, you surrendered to the waves of pleasure, losing yourself completely in the moment as you released onto Mingi’s fingers.

Your head slumped against Yunho’s shoulder as he held you, and you watched Mingi lick your juices off his chubby fingers before shoving them into Yunho's mouth. The sight in front of you sent butterflies racing in your stomach; watching them taste your slick made your core throb with a desperate need for attention.

Without wasting any more time, Yunho twisted your body toward him, his lips glistening with remnants of your juices as hot water cascaded down his face. His hands pulled you closer, signaling you to jump. You wrapped your legs around his waist, a sense of urgency consuming you. In one swift motion, he thrust his hard, aching length into you, filling you completely.

“God, you feel incredible, baby” Yunho groaned, his eyes dark with lust as he relished the sensation of you around him, your walls hugging him providing a warm yet tempting sensation. He was hungry, yet he held back, waiting for Mingi to join.

Taking the cue, Mingi closed the distance, positioning himself behind you. “You ready for more, doll?” he asked, his voice low and sultry, sending a shiver down your spine. You nodded eagerly, excitement pooling in your stomach.

With a firm grip on your hips, Mingi pressed himself against you, slowly pushing his cock inside your ass. “You’re so tight” he grunted, a mix of pleasure and disbelief in his voice as he slid deeper. “You’re going to feel amazing filled up by both of us.”

The sensation was overwhelming; the hot water, both your holes occupied, and the intoxicating feeling of being completely claimed by both men. You let out a breathy moan, a mix of pleasure and slight discomfort as you adjusted to the sensation.

“I’ve never felt anything like this. Boys, please move.” you gasped but responded to them, your body trembling with delight.

Yunho tightened his grip on you, his thrusts steady and deep, matching Mingi's rhythm as he began to move behind you. “Just relax and let us take care of you” Yunho whispered against your ear, his breath hot and inviting. “You’re going to love this.”

“We’ve got you, princess” Mingi encouraged, his hands finding your waist, guiding your movements as they both took you to new heights of pleasure. “Close your eyes and let loose.”

You obeyed as their pace quickened, drawing a chorus of moans from your lips, leaving you breathless. The overwhelming sensation, mixed with the heat of the water, only heightened your arousal. The boys were just as breathless, groaning with each hard thrust. Mingi's lips parted in a string of "oh my gods" as he pushed deeper inside you. You could feel him on the edge, just like your own release was building to its peak.

Suddenly, Yunho slowed his thrusts, savoring the moment as he realized both you and Mingi were hovering on the edge. “What’s the rush, baby?” he teased, his voice low and sultry. “We want to feel every single second .”

Mingi chuckled, pressing his chest against your back, his hands gripping your hips firmly. “Let’s take our time” he whispered hotly against your ear. “We want to enjoy you completely.”

The change in pace drove you wild, and you squirmed between them, desperate for more. “Please… don’t stop” you gasped, the need overwhelming you.

“Such a needy little thing” Yunho murmured with a wicked grin. “Just the way we like it.” With that, he picked up the pace again, thrusting into you harder, while Mingi added more pressure from behind, teasing and heightening the electric pleasure surging through you.

The urgency in your core built up rapidly. “I’m so close” you moaned, eyes fluttering shut as everything else faded away, only the two of them and the pleasure they gave you remained.

“I can’t hold on much longer, gonna cum.” you gasped, your body trembling between them. An urged need to release and break apart washed over you pushing you more and more and over the edge.

Yunho and Mingi exchanged knowing glances, their thrusts becoming more conssitent and delicious. “Cum for us, doll.” Mingi urged, his sultry voice in your ear. “We’re right there with you.”

With a final deep thrust from Yunho and Mingi's teasing dicks, pleasure crashed over you like a huge wave. A loud moan escaped your lips as your release hit, sending shock waves through your entire body. “Holy fuck”

Feeling you clench around him, Yunho groaned, his grip tightening. Mingi pressed against you from behind, both men overwhelmed by your powerful release had their cocks twitching for a release.

“Damn, you feel incredible” Yunho breathed, thrusting erratically. “We’re right behind you, princess.”

With one last powerful thrust, Yunho filled you, followed by Mingi, their warmth mingling as waves of pleasure crashed over you once more.

As they pulled out, you leaned back against Yunho, feeling blissfully satisfied. “Best shower ever” you murmured, wrapped in the warmth of their embrace

Truly that was the best shower and the best sex ever.

Yunho and Mingi stepped out of the shower, with Yunho carrying you. They took care of you, drying your hair and helping you get dressed before cleaning themselves up. Being taken care of like this was something you hadn’t experienced in a while, and it felt nice, you heart did a happy dance as you smiled at them, soaking their warm energy in.

Once dressed, you and Yunho settled on the living room couch, flipping through random channels on TV. Mingi soon joined, bringing refreshments, and settled on your left. The three of you cuddled on the couch, with you sandwiched between their warm, muscular bodies.

“What about my dad...?” you trailed off, the thought of explaining this to him crossing your mind as he was set to return from his business trip.

“Let’s worry about that later, yeah princess?” Yunho suggested, stealing a quick peck from your lips.

“Let’s just enjoy being together now, doll” Mingi added, pressing a soft kiss to your shoulder.

Yeah that for the future you to worry. We’ll take care of daddy, lets enjoy the present for now.

For Now, Damsel no longer in stress.

~ ~ Chérie ☆ signin’ off

DISCLAIMER: This is totally fictional and not a real depiction of the ATEEZ members. It's all just for fun only so please don’t take anything seriously and keep the mood light around here.

© ShixCherie.

[joonsytip]

All Too Well || Wonwoo

Synopsis: With Wonwoo's dilemma hitting the wall and your perseverance getting stronger, will the events unfold as foreseen or the fate will turn its course?

Word Count: 2k

Third and final installment of Wonwoo drabble series (set in the Withering for You universe but can be read as a standalone drabble series).

[ SVT Masterlist ] [ SVT Flick - Fic Masterlist ]

Say Don't Go | So It Goes | All Too Well

It's been a week since Wonwoo has seen you. When he woke up that fateful day along with nothing but the void you, it didn't take him long to recollect the happenings from within the car to his sheets. The slightly recovered bruises on his knuckles and the bloodstains on his bedroom wall are the witnesses of the frenzy state he was in, still is.

The guilt of sleeping with you eats him up. The regret of getting wasted and causing the slip of his true feelings and also his dick into you, makes him wanna get swallowed by the ground. He hates that his subconscious mind was conscious enough to hear your sobs but did nothing to stop them.

Wonwoo contemplates for the whole week that follows. He wonders if he should contact you or let you have your space and contact him whenever you're ready.

He's not clear in head, unsure of what he'd say on seeing you again.

Sorry, it was a mistake. He wonders if he should go ahead with the classic lie and be an entitled jerk, letting you berate him which would gradually help you in letting go those feelings for him.

It wasn't a mistake, I really meant everything I said and did but sorry we can't be together. This seemed too much of truth bombing in a situation where the other party (you) is already hurt beyond repair.

In his mind, he tries several other permutations and combinations but never considers that one way which would save everyone from the headaches and all the heartbreaks.

Everyone can sense the shift, something has definitely happened by the way you have been avoiding meetups and can guess the reason to be Wonwoo. They can't pinpoint exactly but they're sure it started right after that night's party.

"I need you to take everything off your chest while I'm asking you nicely.", your best friend tells you, "My patience has been thinned nowadays and don't make me loose my temper."

Your teeth sink into your bottom lip, as you look at her and Seungcheol whose eyes are begging you to comply with his wife because she can indeed be scary.

"Do you want Seungcheol to be gone from here?", she asks, her gaze softening, "It's okay, he won't mind."

Before you could answer, Seungcheol is already off his seat saying, "I'll head back to the office, have some matters to take care of.", and he leans to peck his wife on forehead, "Call me if you need anything and let me know once done, I'll come and pick you up."

After Seungcheol leaves, a comfortable silence falls upon.

"You're already showing.", you say smiling and your best friend mirrors one to you.

"Four months already", she says caressing her protruding belly, "Time flies by, I swear it feels like yesterday I took the test and it came out positive. Seungcheol had cried the whole night, holding me close. Though he has became a lot more sensitive than me.", she adds and looks at you, "But enough about us. I came here just to make you lift some weight off. I could have brought Gyu, but I thought we should have a one to one before letting the guys know if at all you're willing to."

When your gazes meet, you can tell that she already has an inkling because her hunch has always been accurate. So you squirm in your seat and after failing to keep the tears at bay you tell her what had exactly happened in a messy-teary state.

After consoling you, she waits for you to stop crying, blinking back her own tears.

"Are you planning to address this to Wonwoo?", she asks softly.

You shake your head, "He probably doesn't even remember."

"Bullshit." she scoffs, "Are you waiting for him to contact you? Do you want me to talk to him?"

You chuckle with all bitterness, "Yes, I wanted him to contact me but it's been a week already and honestly, I don't even want to see him now because he'll repeat the same words, which are not exactly pleasant to hear. I hate how right headed he is, how all his fears are legit. I wouldn't have done it either."

You lean up to look at her, "Also, I don't want you to talk to him and I'd appreciate it if you can keep this to yourself because we're in the same group and the guys would cause a ruckus if they become aware."

She strokes your hair in a soothing manner and you almost drift off until she nudges you to tell something but you're already dismissing her off, "Don't even think of trying to do anything. I've just accepted my fate, I'll gradually move on."

Another week passes by and Wonwoo thinks he's ready to confront you. He had taken the entire office, everyone in his circle by surprise by taking an entire week off. Seungcheol being an amazing boss and understanding friend easily granted his request in the best hopes of having his friend clear the clouds clogging in his head.

Wonwoo sends you a text asking you to meet him whenever you're free. He clutches the phone tightly in his hands, feet tapping anxiously as he awaits your reply.

When he doesn't receive one after an hour, he's calling you only to be unanswered. Rationality leaving his bones, he keeps on calling your number until it gets recieved and it's an unfamiliar male voice answering the phone.

There's a sharp pang in his heart when he gets to know that it's your blind date who has picked up the call since the phone kept ringing and you've gone to washroom. Though he wants nothing but to rush to whenever you currently are, he curtly ends the call and decides to wait for your reply to his text.

His unwavering gaze directed towards the phone might have worked because he receives a response late at night and he's meeting you tomorrow.

You are unfazed, never once thinking about Wonwoo. That's what you try to tell yourself, that's how you plan to act in front of him. You don't anticipate his arrival at your apartment, that's partially true because you know you're gonna get heartbroken again because even though you want to tie the loose ends, you're sure he's only coming to cut them off wholly.

So you tell your mother who has been nagging you to get married to set you up for blind dates and this time you promised you'd seriously consider them with marriage perspective. Hence, today you're going to another date with someone you know this time and not at all impressed about.

The doorbell rings and you check the monitor to confirm that it's Wonwoo before letting him in.

"Are you going somewhere?", Wonwoo asks as he settles on the couch and you take a seat on the chair.

You nod, "Going on a date with Minjun."

Wonwoo's jaw clenches, his hands ball into fists as he asks, "Kim Minjun? He's a womanizer, Y/N. Didn't you go on a date yesterday?"

You scoff, "And how does that concern you anyway?", your lips curl up, "People can change after marriage."

Wonwoo short circuits at your verbal jab.

"Marriage? How can you even consider Minjun out of all people?"

Your expression turns grim when you say, "If I can't marry the person I love then marriage for me would be just another business deal, another merge to benefit the company, solidify our social status."

Trying to maintain the unbothered facade, you ask, "Why did you want to meet?"

"Why did you leave me alone in the bed?", Wonwoo asks toning down, "When you left, you took all of the warmth with you."

You suck in a sharp breath, breaking the eye contact.

"Within these two weeks I went through all sorts of possibilities from never acknowledging the fact that we slept to being a jerk, dismissing it as a simple hookup to letting you down subtly.", he gets up and walks up to you, crouching in front of you, "But as I pondered over, the only honest answer residing within my heart was not to be a coward anymore and be honest about my feelings, be honest with you."

Your heartbeat quickens, as his hands encase yours, you feel the warmth seep from him.

"I love you, Y/N.", Wonwoo confesses, "Like you, I have also harboured feelings for you for a long time. I cherish every moment we've spent together."

You're eyes go wide, heart constricting in chest. You feel your inners catapulting. You thought you know him all too well to give up upon the possibility of being together but witnessing him stripping bare in front of you is something you've always wanted but never expected to happen.

Wonwoo gently holds your face, voice soft, gaze emitting tenderness when he says, "I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for projecting my fears and insecurities upon you. But I have realised that you're worth everything and above. For you, I would fight the world if you allow me to stay by your side."

Rendered speechless, your teary eyes look at him with such anguish that it makes Wonwoo want to beat himself for breaking your heart over and over again.

Moments pass by and you both fall into comfortable silence. You're now seated on his lap, head laying his chest as he gently strokes your hair.

"It won't be easy.", you speak, head still downed, as your hand takes in his, entwining the fingers, "But I'd go to hell and back for you if time comes."

You shift back to look at him, "And I promise to be your shield, if anyone tries to hurt you or Wonseok, they'd have to face me first. I won't let anyone hurt you.", your gaze softens, "All of your worries, fears and sentiments are valid, Wonwoo. But it would be nice if you share them with me from now on because you're not alone, we're in this together. I love you."

Wonwoo swears he doesn't cry easily but your words seem to have opened the floodgates as his loud sobs echo throughout the house.

"Thank you.", he smiles as you wipe his tears and leans in to kiss you.

As your lips graze, the shrill ringing your phone startles you both. You grab it from the couch and the screen flashes Kim Minjun as the caller.

There's a sharp change in Wonwoo's expression as he takes the phone from your hand, putting it on speaker and answering it.

"Uh sorry, who's this speaking? Could you please get Y/N on the phone?"

There's a terse movement in the muscles of his jaw as Wonwoo responds, "I'm Jeon Wonwoo, Y/N's--", his gaze shifts at you, lips stretching in a smile, "Lover. I'm cancelling the date and please don't ever contact her again."

As soon as he hangs up, you tease him, "Lover huh? Since when?"

Wonwoo grins like he's drunk in love, he might as well be, "Since the day, you got drunk and danced on the tabletop after the semesters ended."

You gasp, "What do you want in exchange for deleting this memory?"

He's so lovesick, giggling cutely and being all touchy, "What about making new ones and keeping this one in my vault, sealed?"

Your heart flutters at the insinuation. True to your words, you'd surely fight the world to keep him with you.

And your lover chants all's well that ends well to ending up with you, gratefully with all his heart.

→ Do not copy, re-post, translate, or share any of my works on other platforms! All stories are copyrighted, joonsytip. ©️

[goldengirliez]

oml, please help me, I can't stop thinking about giving head to Manila Mikey.

Idea from this drabble! ☆

02:53 pm

We all know how Mikey is, deep inside that apathetic shell of his, his empty heart and dull eyes, he's aching uncontrollably to feel anything aside from that void that consumes his senseless.

He gets so overwhelmed that he often forgets to eat, shower, and take care of himself with basic actions.

But he has you. His beloved, his light in the darkness, his anchor during the storm that keeps him grounded.

Even on days when intrusive thoughts caress his skin alluringly, you're there to keep them away from your man, you're there and keep him alive.

Just like today.

It's a hot, clammy day: no matter how many windows you may want to open, the air won't just come in to cool down your dripping skin, the oppressive weather creeps through your lungs and violates them, taking away the oxygen you need way too soon.

You're hot, you are bored and you're tired of waiting for your boyfriend to get out of the shower so you can get it all for yourself.

Your bare feet tap softly against the floor, quickly moving towards the bathroom where you left your beloved around thirty minutes ago, ready to scold him for taking so long.

You put your hand on the golden, rusty doorknob and turn it silently. Pushing the wooden panel open with a small "creak" sound, the humidity of the post-shower air invades your senses, inserting in between the fabric of your soft garments and dampening your skin even so slightly.

Your eyes immediately fall on the figure in front of you, seated on the glossy, black stool next to the sink.

Mikey's head is dropped low, his wet liquorice hair is covering his pale, porcelain skin: his onyx eyes are slightly visible to you and they are surely lost in nothingness. He's sitting still, not moving a muscle as if he didn't even notice you enter before.

You're not going to scold that poor angel for a fucking shower: you're going to scold yourself for not taking it with him. He often gets lost in thoughts and that's not a good sign at all.

"'jiro, what's wrong?"

You carefully step closer to him, crouching down to his level and cradling his fluffy cheeks in your hands: slowly blinking his eyes, as if was slowly waking up from a peaceful dream, he looks up at you desperately.

"Please, make them shut the fuck up".

Often the best way to silence your thoughts is to focus on something louder than the voices inside your head.

That's what Mikey needs right now.

Usually, he would let you suck him off to your heart's content but that's not what he needs right now: he needs to feel loved, cared about and seen. He needs to know he's there with you and not anywhere else lost in his mind.

You can feel the hardness of the cold tiles underneath your knees as you kneel in front of him, which is in contrast with the hotness of that cute, pinkish mushroom head of his shaft and the smoothness of his skin in your palm.

Manjiro's eyes are focused on you, just like you asked him to: they are completely blown out, his angelic face has a cherry red hue on his cheeks, and his lips are slightly puffy due to his constant biting in them.

When your tongue gently wraps around the tip and sucks on it harshly, squeezing with your hand the base of his dick (just how he likes it) his onyx irises roll in the back of his skull and his hand goes straight to his mouth, muffling with a hum one of his pretty moans.

Just when you take him deeper, your ears are blessed with his unfiltered voice, a desperate call of your name: you can feel his hardness make its way down your throat gradually, and the salty taste of his pre on your taste buds makes you salivate.

Just when his cock touches the back of your throat your eyes water and not because of the burning sensation or the ache of your jaw but because of his goddamn pretty face.

Manjiro's wet liquorice hair is sticking to his damp forehead due to the water of the shower he took; onyx orbs are staring deeply into your soul, flickering up and down your face not knowing where to focus; sweat is dripping down his defined jaw and sliding on his bobbing adam apple every time he gulps; his black undershirt is sticking to his string chest; his tattooed neck is stretched to the side as he can barely keep his head up due to how good you're making him feel.

He's a masterpiece and he's all yours.

"Baby... Y-You're taking it so fucking deep– oh fuck!"

It wouldn't take long for you to bob your head according to his liking when his calloused hand touches your cheek and smoothly runs up through your hair, gripping it slightly so it won't cover your eyes.

The burn in your throat might be becoming unbearable but having your man scream your name endlessly is what keeps you up: his whole attention is on you, you're the only one he's thinking about, you're the only one he's feeling.

You can feel him throb against the walls of your mouth, his veins pulsating underneath your skilled tongue: you take him out with a slurping sound and begin to fist his cock, squeezing the tip and gripping the base, fiddling with his balls, wanting to coo at him as a last push. Your sugar-coated sweet-nothings are the most sincere as you look into his eyes with heart-shaped ones almost: good boy, I love you, baby, this is all for you.

After a dark time that day, he's finally seeing stars.

Mikey's orbs shine with the tears that roll down his burning cheeks, his voice is desperate and whiny, unable to keep up with the pace you're setting just for him.

Wet, squelching sounds that echo through his ears along with your praises are like a melody and when his hand comes on top of yours as you keep on moving it fast, you know you've done the trick.

"Ah– oh, shit! B-baby, I- I'm- I- please".

As you kiss lovingly his inner thigh which is decorated with every shade of red because of the blooming love marks you gave him, he feels a shock of electricity run down his spine.

As a blissed cry of your name booms out of his chest, his eyes scrunch shut and his head gets thrown back, you're already there to put your mouth on his throbbing tip and keep his love seed into your mouth, safe and sound.

He takes a while to calm down, but when he does he doesn't hesitate to get you on his lap and hug you close, whispering with a heavy breath how much he loves you, how grateful he is for having you by his side and an endless string of thank you.

You're both dripping in sweat, fuming due to the heated act you had so the sudden thin, delicate breeze that comes in from the bathroom door makes you sigh contently.

Manjiro's the one to speak first "I guess we need to shower again", he chuckles... His genuine laugh makes your lips curl into a fond smile as you take his hand in yours and kiss his knuckles gently.

"I'll do it with you so I'll keep the bad thoughts away this time".

He loved the sound of that.

I'm experimenting with new kinds of writing so I don't know how I feel about this drabble: it was simply living in my head rent-free–

I hope you enjoyed reading this drabble!

English isn't my first language so I apologise for any mistakes!

Sending y'all hugs. ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ꒰ঌ ♡ ໒꒱ ⊹ ࣪ ˖

©GOLDENGIRLIEZ do not repost or modify on any platform.

[biting-miguel-ohara]

Mindfuck - Cassandra Nova x male!Reader

A/N: this was a fun request to fulfill. Gonna be honest, I did not have the same experience as the anon requester, but it was enjoyable to write all the same

Written for this request

Dividers by @/enchanthings

CW: Deadpool & Wolverine spoilers (sorta), fourth wall breaks (kinda), killing mentions, Cassandra’s hand/mind powers, explicit sexual content, smut, handjob, mindjob (I got no clue what you’d call this tbh), Cassandra calls Reader pet, kissing

900 words

“Well, well, well.” The woman stops in front of you. “Look who we have here.”

You know who she is. By her appearance, if not her voice. Cassandra Nova. Charles Xavier’s twin sister. Most of the Void’s citizens have a death grudge against her.

You find her rather attractive, actually. Most of their insults had been about her personality, or her actions, but the really foul ones had been about her appearance. You’d been expecting some wizened old hag, not the beautiful woman before you.

“It’s been quite some time since a Reader was in the Void.” Cassandra crouches to be eye-level with you. It feels vaguely condescending. Probably because you’re on your knees. You’re kinda into it.

“And quite a handsome one at that,” she muses. “Pity you’ll be dying soon. I’d have rather liked to keep you.”

“D-Dying?” Your voice comes out higher than you’d intended. You cough and try again. “Dying? What do you mean, dying?”

She raises an eyebrow, a small smile playing across her lips. “I’m going to kill you, of course. Right after I look into that interesting little brain of yours.”

“What—“ You don’t get a chance to finish. She reaches out and pushes her fucking fingers into your brain.

You choke on your own spit, eyes going wide. The blood leaves your head, leaving you dizzy and feeling weird.

Memories flash behind your eyes. Your childhood. Your life. Your trip to the Void.

You finally find your voice, intending to spit something out. Probably a scream.

Instead, you moan.

It catches you both by surprise. She pulls back, staring at you. Your face heats up and you stutter a bit. “Uh… S-Sorry?”

She grips your chin and forces your head back. Examining you with interest. “You’re not afraid. How peculiar.”

You do a mental check. Weirded out? Yes. Confused? Very. Turned on?

You can feel your dick straining against your pants. Can feel the throbbing of it. You haven’t been this hard since you saw your first pair of tits.

“Nope.” You croak out. “Definitely not afraid.”

“Interesting.” She lets go of your chin. “I think I’m going to keep you after all.”

You swallow. Give her a weak smile. “Does that mean you’ll do your hand thing again?”

Cassandra just smirks.

The guy carrying you throws you into the bed with a little too much force to not be deliberate.

You wince and Cassandra clicks her tongue. “Gentle, Pyro. We don’t want to break my new pet now, do we?”

His glare towards you does not make you feel any better. Pyro just scoffs and stalks out of the room. You’re left with Cassandra, who takes her time approaching the bed.

She lets her coat fall to the ground, revealing her outfit underneath. Your mouth goes dry and your dick twitches.

Being manhandled by Pyro hadn’t exactly been your idea of sexy, but being here with Cassandra? There’s definitely interest going on.

You lick your lips and hope your voice comes out normal. “So, what’s the plan?”

“I’m going to learn your secrets.” She settles onto the bed next to you, reaching out and tracing her fingers across your forehead. “And then I’m going to play with you.”

You don’t get a chance to even nod before her fingers are back inside your head. It feels just as weird as the first time. You can feel them inside your brain, probing around as images and memories flash through your mind.

She’s more thorough than last time, sifting through your memories more slowly. As if she’s looking for something.

Vaguely, you’re aware of her pressing you down to the bed. Of a free hand tracing its way down your chest.

You’re more focused on the hand fingering your brain. On the way your dick throbs in your pants. You let out a weak moan.

And then the first scene pops up. Your first teenage fantasy, filled with giddy emotion. Then another. A moment filled with passion and temptation. Then another and another.

You feel fingers toying with the zipper of your pants. A hand dipping below your boxers as memories play through your head. You cry out, arching up into her touch.

It’s too much, all at once. Your body pulses with heat, with need. Cassandra strokes your dick, digging her fingers deeper into your brain.

“Please, please, fuck!” You babble, thrusting your hips up erratically chasing your rapidly approaching high. A couple more memories, a few more heavenly strokes, and you’re cumming so hard your vision blurs out.

It takes you several gasping moments to come back to your body. You can feel a cool hand caressing your cheek, soft words being spoken.

Your head feels woozy. Your thoughts, thick and sluggish. You feel fantastic. The aftershocks of pleasure jolt through you, making you shiver.

“How was it, my little pet?” Cassandra coos. “I’m going to pull all that Reader knowledge from your brain. Make myself the strongest being here. And all you have to do is lie there and submit.”

You moan softly. Weakly. That offer sounds far too tempting to give up, especially if she’s going to do that again.

So you just nod, your tongue heavy in your mouth. “Alright…”

She smiles and leans down to place a kiss on your lips. “You’re going to be a perfect pet.”

You feel too pleasure-drunk to do anything but agree.

[7nessasaryevils]

I'm back with things that made me clutch my chest, snap my neck, scream into the void etc etc... from ep 6 of Wandee Goodday.

Settle in my loves, we're in for one heck of a ride!

- starting us off strong with Yak waking up Dee, pouting about them not being able to see each other for a week because of the training camp, THE HEAD RUFFLE AND FOREHEAD KISS.... HELP ME IM GOING TO KILL THEM

- we're also back to the elephant pants and I cannot describe my happiness at seeing Yak wearing something that makes him comfortable while being with Dee

- that whole fucking montage... look at these domestic "we're just fuck buddies" assholes. Gentlemen, you wouldn't know "fuck buddies" if they were sucking your dick....

- TOOTHBRUSHES SIDE BY SIDE

- HES WEARING THE NECKLACE

- I had to physically stop myself from smacking my head into a wall at Yak's "I see you (Dee) more than I see her (Taem)" .... insert Scar's imsurroundedbyidiots.gif

- I love the way Dee thinks that Yoryak has no weakness? He genuinely seems surprised that Yak needs to go get trained 🥹🥹 also how worried he is when Yak explains his first loss...

- here's me toasting you Khun Yak for that sex joke 🤣👍🏽

-Patpran would be so proud... BET ERA MY BELOVED (if they fist bump I'll scream... oh phooey they didn't)

- them texting each other about their day... gwenchana gwenchana 😭😭😭

- I guess Oishi GreenTea is not sponsoring them 😅🤣

- Yak and Yei... just that scene...

- dee on the couch... quite obviously missing Yak... you dumbass ♥️🥺

- HE LEFT HIS PANTS THE- HE LEAVES CLOTHES AT DEE'S PLACE YOU DUMBASSES ARE SO INTO BOYFRIEND TERRITORY ITS OBVIOUS TO PLUTO!!

- that change in perspective... Golf... I see you and your masterful brain 👀👀👀

- HES WEARING THE PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNTTTTTTSSSSSSS

- Dee making a mess on the mirror on purpose (I'm not crying I'm NOT)

- sweetheart... you're in love with Yoryak... 🥹🥺♥️

- Cher? My darling? Give Yei a really good blowjob when he comes back because your hubby is fucking SMART (also yak and yei sleeping on a bed together... adorable sibling behaviour)

- me when Yak walks outside: ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh wandee is gonna show up he's gonna show up he lost the bet he's gon- OHHHHH YAK CLOSED HIS EYES AND WHEN HE OPENS THEM DEE WILL BE THERE!!!!

- me when i turned out to be right:

- "the atmosphere here is nice." "It got even better with you here." SOMEBODY SEDATE ME!

- hey pot? I believe the kettle is calling you black.

- give me a kiss... look at these two idi-

- you know when you have to put your phone down because you cannot believe the audacity? Yeah... that's me when Yak points right to his lips. Sir. You dumbass.

- my knees just gave out

- nobody hold me back im about my plant my foot into Ter's face

- KAAAAAAOOOOOOO HI BABY!!

- oh no. Oh no no no no. This is one time I do NOT WANT a whole "oh there's only one bed"!!!!

- side note: is this what happened with Billy and Babe when they went to Japan? 🤔🤔 thank you Kao 🤣♥️

- forget my foot. I'm dropping a fucking ANVIL on this asshole's face- where does Ter get off making decisions for Dee???

- DONT KISS HIM BACK OFF STRANGER DANGER STRANGER DANGER YAK HELP!!! (edit: two mins later I was even more pissed off because Ter knows that Dee has a boyfriend, "fake" as it is, and he still tried to kiss Dee! This dickhead!!!)

- WELL DONE DEE!

- well done P'Golf!! HPV knowledge my beloved ♥️♥️

- Dee no!!! Don't think about that horse-faced dick doctor (if I had a quarter every time I said that, I'd have two quarters only... but weird for it to happen twice - fuck you Dr. Charlatan!!!)

- YAK! Come get your man!!

- I'm all for you two seeing each other again but NOT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET THATS HOW WE DIE!!! MOVE YOU DUMB GAYS! (Edit: Kay but now think of the fact that Dee is terrified of crossing the street and how easily he does it when it's Yak he's walking to...this is okay I'm okay I'm so okay)

- love and the city... p'golf you fucking genius

- kisses in the stairwell... gods they really want me to choke don't they?

- second time I had to put my phone down... Yoryak... I'm this close to drop-kicking you across the country

- my body is yours... and so is your heart you idiot get to that realization faster!!! Pat would be so disappointed!

- Kao coming in with those truths... my utmost respect for you sir 🫡🫡

- oh shit...

- TAEM YOU QUEEN YES!!

- DEE YOU DUMBASS NO!

- hats off to Cher and Yei being adorable and happy in their sex lives which includes phone sex!!! We approve!!!

- the side by side!!!! Interesting to think of it as a couple making love vs. a couple fucking but it's actually two couples in love... awww

- OYEI AND CHER LIP KISS THANK YOU P'GOLF!!!!

- Kao. Sir. I'm erecting temples in your honour. Making merit. Fasting. Praying for you to find someone who loves you the way you want to be loved. I'm doing it all for you because you fucking deserve it.

- the pink on Dee's face... sweetheart you're so in love with him 🥺🥺

- GROUP DATE!!!! And our resident idiot gays are in matching pants.... lord gimme strength

- feeding each oth- breathe Nessie breathe. The idiots know not how they hurt you.

- Yak recognizing that something's going on between Yei and Cher is such a lovely thing. Now if only he could realize stuff about himself and Dee!

- third time I put down my phone... but to cry because Yak remembers Dee's fear and holds his hand I'm fucking fine don't touch me

- oh no... Yei you got yourself mixed up with loan sharks! honey no!

- yak comparing the pics of him, Cher, Yei and Dee to the family picture... this epsiode really said we're going to stomp on your heart Nessie...

- they're still holding hands... fuck

- I'm begging whatever deity is listening to me: please don't let there be a scene where Dee tells the public about yak's secret place

- one more word and I'll kiss you... on the lips. (Okay but the fact that he says this and still thinks he might be in love with Taem makes me feel like this 👇🏽

- Yei you utter romantic sap 🥹🥹🥹🥹🫡

- the story of how Yei and Cher met... fucking fuck 😭😭😭

- and then ending it off with Dee knowing that no matter what his feelings, the fact that Yak is the only person who makes him feel at ease... FUCKING FUCKITY FUCK

this epsiode came for my whole existence and the next one... the next one is gonna have me on the floor THANKS!

[plaguethewaters]

@thetiredyuk i am having more Thoughts about that one - ranboo is the sone of death beeduo au. I was about to just send you an ask but also this is almost 2k words so it may be better off as a post lmfao

So like. bullet points time, this is an approximate summary of what i think the Plot would be like - wordbuilding aside

(Temporary mcd, suicide warning)

Year like, 1500 something (to be more well researched but i do want it to be like. something something renaissance. it works) we've got two poor ass kids born of the same year. Except tommy is pretty much a normal guy, liked by his family and such. His parents have enough children they can gamble for at least one to be successfull, so they send him to be a painter's apprentice in the hope he'll make some kind of money. There, in the slighter bigger town thats almost a city but not quite, he meets tubbo. Now Tubbo would have been a normal guy, except he was born with facial deformities so now everyone thinks he's a demonic freak hated by the gods (this renaissance world is politheistic bc kristin needs to be there and also i wil not do christianity if i dont have to lmao.)

Tommy is not intimidated by any gods. obviously. also his dad is really into the goddess of death and he prays enough for both of them, so he's like. protected and shite. And he immidiately hits it off with the cursed boy

surprise hes not actually cursed but people are dicks anyways. Tommy makes him a fancy mask to cover his face - even thought its totally cool as shit, but its cool enough only tommy should ever get to see it - and that eventually does help him. Because tubbo wasnt like, a shit guy. Hes a damn good builder and knows how to read, which are talents big enough that the costruction workers for that church out of town are ready to ignore the whole probably cursed thing. As long as he as the masks.

Tommy: makes him the first genuine gift hes ever received in fifteen years of life Tubbo: never takes it off again. like never Tommy: shocked pikachu face

anyways so tommy dies like. super young. They have their fun for a few years but at like seventeen tommy is called to be the artist for this very fancy duke of the town over - and at the start they'r super happy bc that means Money and Food and Roof over your head and shite. its a very good fucking deal.

except the noble is a bastard. His town revolts against him, and when they storm the castle they aren't exactly asking names or faces: tommy gets immidiately like, super destroyed by the crowd, and dies a few minutes later.

Tubbo hears of this like five months later bc its the fifteen hunderds and hes poor.

He does Not take it very well ngl

He goes a bit murdery - basically hes like "im not living without tommy, might as well burn down a village while im at it right, right."

Now ranboo, in all of this, freshly the equivalent of seventeen for an immortal death being, is starting on their training to actually become death- His mom send him on a quaint little village in europe thinking "hey, the most those guys die of is like. malaria. consumption maybe. itll be easy as hell"

And now like two hundred different souls are around him with FIRE written on their foreheads and Ranboo feels distinctly outside of his range, to be really honest.

he steps a couple ethereak planes down just to see what the heck is the matter - if this is another of those voide beings his mom will be Super Pissed and they want to see that reaction

And it isnt the void people

Instead, in front of their eyes, the singular most beautiful person hes ever seen - and hes seen lots, in this line of work.

He cant see their face, but their actions speak enough. The sheer rage, the almost dance like movement of their body perfectly framed by the light of their torch, seeing no humanity or mercy in whatever their searching for. their hair look angelic in its softness, burnt by the worst flames of hell and yet tended by the same hands who wield it - strong hands, clearly forged by hard work and dedication. This is a guy who has nothing to lose, and there's little Death loves most than someone who doesnt fear it.

He has to go down, has to speak to them immidiately.

So he does.

There's really no time - his mom had given the singular rule not to interact with humans, shell be on them in Seconds- but one question can be asked in the haste: "What brings a mortal to do this?"

"It's all for you, love!" the mortal says. They also say some other things, after, but Ranboo is not very well versed in the human tongue and they are speaking Very Loudly.

(Tubbo actually said "Fuck you, you motherfucker it's Your Fault, you took every single thing i love". Easy mistake, if one thinks about it.)

Their mom is Pretty Pissed but she does undesrtand stupid things done for young love. So she's like "eh, ive loved mortals too. go have fun" and everything

Except a year passes, and ranboo still hasnt even spoken to the guy, and she remembers suddenly Mortality Exists.

Shes never had them take a soul who died naturally - for lack of occasion, mostly - and they may have been. a tad sheltered. They most definitely do Not know what death actually is like for humans, nor how long does it take for them to die

she wonders if it would be a tad overprotective to take this over for them

she thinks about seventy years in the future, at most, when the boy dies. She thinks that her son cannot cry but can definitely cry. she thinks of their screams of sadness ringing through her ears-

Tubbo wakes up in the river, alive.

He did not Intend to be alive, and it's actually quite unfortunate for him to be so.The survivors are quite angry and probably close to him, now. Welp, no way to die is reallt any worse than another, he thinks. Ill just wait here for them.

When the pitchfork collapses his heart and he continues breathing, he understands something might be a little bit wrong.

And like, a good five hundred years pass like this.

Things Tubbo has learned in his five hundred, twenty three and two halves years on this demon forsaken earth:

Clothes get so much shittier over time. he has One (1) tailored shit from the 1800 and Nothing has even barely compared to it ever since.

getting stabbed does not hurt less just because youre not actually dying. Poisoning is actiively way worse since you're not actually dying. Diving off cliffs is Not Fun. In general, try not to do dying things even if youre immortal

theres a hole in his heart where his loved ones were and it will never get filled

Food gets esponentially better over time. Lord bless whoever decided curry should go on chicken because they were Cooking For Real. Chocolate was still better before though.

Working for soulles bosses has not changed At All in all of this time tho.

he works at mcdonalds because no college would accept his non existant resume, and being immortal dosent deprive him of his needs unfortunately. The manager took one look at this kid dressed from like three different centuries with a goat mask on his head and was like. why not. at least youre not a stoner and you know how to read.

His coworkers firmly believe hes a criptid and have a full going investigation to prove it. The highest bet at fifty dollars says hes mothman in disguise, there to eat the fliest that live on their shitty food. The lowest bets hes an angel waiting for the right time to brign down armageddon.

Every night he goes in the woods to an almost forgotten Death altar and he prays. Half of his prayers consist of insults and the other half are pleas for her to fucking kill him already

This does not help the criptid chronicles

Kristin also has like. only so much patience. Hes holding up the prayers line - which is actually still pretty fucking used in central asia - and hes generally annoying as shit.

She takes ranboo by the scruff, gives them a passable human form, and throws them down there. Get your shit together boy youre like a thousand years old. Get your man (to stop fucking with the phoneline)

Ranboo is Not Enthusiastic about this but cmon. Hes death. How hard can working at a mac really be?

Spoiler it is

Spoiler it does Not matter, because awkwardness aside ranboo is funny, and easy to talk to, and compassionate and caring. He doesnt want to kill tubbo, he doesnt look at him like hes a fictional creature (and yes marcie, hes seen the bet table), he isnt his soulless boss. Tubbo is grieving but he also very desperstely wants a friend.

One day someone stops at his shitty apartment at like three am

Ranboo stands in fron of his door drenched from head to toe, holding the possibly smallest kitten tubbo has ever seen in his Life. Hes miserable but the cat is miracoulously dry, screaming their head off - and ranboo is panicking. Are they okay are they dying? Do you have any food i dont know what he eats but its so small and i didnt know where else to go- please i dont want it to die or something and-

The moon shines on their long, wet hair and their stupid fucking suit is as wrinkled as ever. They look like they desperately want to rub their hands against each other but there is a kitten in the way and it probably makes them even more anxious - theres very little messes bigger than him, right now.

Tubbo falls in love.

They heal the kitten and keep enderchest in their now shared apartment.

They grow closer, and closer, and something is forming. Ranboo is aware a relationship cannot be based on lies, as much as it worries him how tubbo will react.

so he prepares like a romantic ass evening

roses and candles and a nice dinner with a fancy wine

tubbo almost gets flustered

except at the end of the night the confession isnt "i love you" but "im the guy who took away your only ffamily".

and he sees Red.

Ranboo doesnt remember what tubbo screamed, not exactly. He remembers grief, and crying, and feeling worse than he ever believed he could. He remembers the endless guilt sitting in his chest, and the slam of a door - maybe from the inside out. Hes definitely outside, now, and the house ifìs far away enough eh cant see it, but that could also be the tears.

His mother finds him crouched in a patch of grass, tears steaming down their cheeks in a constant flow. Shes not aware if they'd returned to death form to feel safer, or because they believed they deserved the burn. Shes not sure what option makes her feel worse.

shes aware that this is. pretty much her fault

TO HER DEFENSE she was not really aware humans were so touchy about death. The souls she reaps arent very talkative and the guy shes with is chill about it so like. maybe this one is weird

(the guy she's with is Phil, whos Decidly not a human but has also decided not to tell her yet. For the bit, yknow? He's been a live a couple thousand years, it would be awkward to drop it now. He's also somewhat a serial killer and Not Normal about death At All)

BUt this is still here fault and she does have to set it right a little bit

So she summons Tubbo to her persnoal room in the palace and goes like. "oi. why r u so mad little guy"

And hes like: you took away the single person whos ever loved me ever

"Wait that's the only problem?"

"What the fuck else would it be"

"thought u were mad at him cause he lied lol"

"LYING IS NOT WORSE THAN KILLING A GUY"

Anyways Kristen is so relieved rn. She thought tubbo was phisically like, repulsed by the concept of death and all, and he was mad that Ranboo lied to him and all. Which he is, but the rage is so so much less than the grief yknoe. And she knows how to fix it if its just one (1) measly soul

Tommy is so fucking confused

Th modern world is full of sounds and weird textures and the food is fucking fantastic but also Too Much, and Tubbo introduced him to this weird ass potion hed called a bong and now hes seeing gods the likes of which had never been discoveres

Over all hes just happy to be alive and with his best friend

He kinda hates ranboo. The fucker threw a scyte at him for no reason when tommy would have Almost Certainly survived because he is simply That Cool. Ranboo didn't believe in his awesomeness enough and is thus a Bitch

Tubbo is. iffy

He cant deny he has a teensy tiny crush now, because hes far too deep in this for that

But also ranboo did like. lie straight to his face

but also tubbo would Not have believed him if a random guy showed up at three am at a mcdonalds saying they were the child of death

and he Did trust that what he saw in ranboo was real, betrayal aside. No one fakes looking That much like a wet cat

so it does take a while. couple years in fact, to get back at the level of trust they had before (inster a cool anime montage where they have lots of fun together as roommates and cats coparents and all)

One night when they are - not back together, because they hadnt been dating before, but back to that almost definitely dating just not officialized stage- ranboo asks him if would ever want to be mortal again.

And tubbo thinks of it. His time on earth had been so plagued by grief hed never really ecperienced anything it had to offer. Hed never seen the sights or did anything at all besides praying for death, and thats kind of a shitty way to pass five hundred years

'But tubbo what about your humanity? wouldnt it be irrevocabily lost by giving awau something so fundamentally human as death" someone would ask. And tubbo would anser "ehh who cares"

He hasnt been fully human since hes burned that whole village down, anyway. And he likes the benefits of this life more than whateer moral superiority a Normal human would have over him

just-

"and tommy too, obviously. I get the feeling you dont like him dead" Ranboo jokes.

There's no decision at all then. Fuck yeah, immortal boyfriend and immortal brother what more could a fucker want.

They get to cause chaos on earth and probably kill a bunch of rich people for a long long time

the end :)

Im like. very tentatively calling this Deathless Death, in the vane hope that i will write something for this better thant bullet points. But for now bullet points it is

[myfandomrealitea]

I'm sorry I just saw the screenshot of the reblog by that something-wizard. I just had to say: how DARE they to assume someone else's irl condition? how DARE they to assume how my life is and call me privileged based on the fact that I don't want politics or similar things in my fandom space? I'm going through a very HARD time in fact and because I'm dealing with those very things you said irl and CAN'T VOID THEM, I don't want to hear about them in my fandom space! There are more than one server, blog or similar spaces for each fandom. If one doesn't allow irl topics you can join another that does. If there isn't any? Make your own! I and others don't owe you anything, we don't have to explain why we don't want irl topics discussed in our spaces nor do we have to explain our living conditions to you! Also, having rules for our own spaces(blogs, servers and such) is not censorship. We are not saying "don't discuss irl issues in any fandom space or anywhere online ever art all !!!" We are saying "this is a specific place I created and I don't want those things discussed here, there are other places for that".

And to the op of that post and this blog: I'm sorry for my rant here. I just thought someone has to be very self-centered to think the way they do, especially as I go through a hard time their post was a punch to my gut today. Also thank you.

Based on the rest of the blog and their general responses to people they're just an ignorant troll trying to white-knight the internet and earn brownie points for virtue signalling. You'll see a lot of that when getting into online spaces revolving around media analysis or critical discussion.

Frankly, the best way to deal with those people is just to completely and blatantly block and ignore them. The less attention they get for their parading the less satisfying it is for them. Or if you do engage, do it only in a passive way like memes and reaction pictures, which don't actually give them what they're looking for—the chance to argue with you and look superior.

They just wind up looking like a dick.

The vast majority of the people lashing out at me on that post are people who firmly believe that because there is suffering in the world we must all suffer in solidarity. That we must relentlessly and restlessly fight in their honor.

Some might say that ideal is noble. I say its fucking stupid. Psychologists say its fucking stupid. People who have burnt themselves out trying to fulfil that expectation say its fucking stupid.

The people wilfully launching into the worst bad-faith assumptions about that post are the ones who need to sit back and reflect upon themselves. And possibly go back into the educational system.

I'm used to people making the worst assumptions of me. It doesn't bother me. It never will because they don't know me and all their grandstanding just makes them look like a judgemental idiot. I'm here to say what I think and to share factual information, and I'm doing so. If they disagree with that they're welcome to, but I'm not obligated to indulge them on it.

[i-have-dots-in-my-brain]

ayup mates, its me (that one fucking guy that shows up in your fever dreams to offer you garlic bread then fucks off into the void) (i think you need to get a therapist btw)

Call me dots or dot (not correct but when saying something belongs to me you use "dot's". idk why don't ask me)

My cara page (for art): https://cara.app/ihavedotsinmybrain

They/them she/her it/its ( welcome to the mad lab we do experiments with the funny goofy hjinks with the genders here)

TAG GUIDE : my art (self explanatory), dot's thoughts (mad ramblings) (extra note, there are two versions of dot's thoughts, the other one is with the phone version of ' so you can go look for that if you wanna see me posting from outside the comfort of my room and computer), dot’s travel journal (me on holiday), my persona (obviously just my persona) *prone to updates

dumbass who likes to draw ocs and shit. (posts like there is no tomorrow but also like i have all the time in the world) (oc x canon stuff also) (some fanart ig)

if you wanna find my (mostly serious) art, check out @dots-in-my-head (send me asks and dms on this blog) also i have started putting fandom stuff there too so if you want to get my fandom doodles you can look to there as well

still questioning sexuality but currently aro/ace? (idk i'm not in a rush lol) (i WILL dabble in the arts of questioning me sexuality on internet if you got problems with that shoo)

my loveley husband (@octoxxt, pls ignore this blog dude its embarrassing)

why do you need to know my age, ‘you a cop?

will not draw smut or NSFW bcs i will start howling with racous laughter and melt. (i don;t even read smut in fic dude what do expect me to be able to draw im a cartoonish obviously anime style inspired semi-realism but not really shitty doodle artist you put your hopes too high if you think i can draw a dick without making it look like a piece of middle school desk graffiti)

i've got a bit of a dirty mouth but everything is pretty vanilla . (i make edgy dumb jokes sometimes, but it's not my actual personality peace 'n love on planet earth okay) (any time i say i wanna kms IT IS A JOKE) (most of my posts are /srs i will mark it if its a joke i know the pain of not knowing if it was a funny joke or not i gotchu other autistic peeps)

please talk to me god i am lonely (i am serious about this i love it when people rb and scream in the tags it genuinely makes my day) (send me asks send measkssendmeaskssendmeasks—)

Absolute art machine(whether the art is good or not is a big question that i am not ready to answer) makes shitty animations sometimes idk.

Uses lol too much. Chinese, knows mandarin (translate the random messages for maximum brain damage) i don't know simplified but i do know traditional (please talk to me i need to practice my chinese reading skills) am i a furry? idk but if you're mad about it you can fuck right off (i have a couple ocs and my darling fursona)

am currently inbetween fandoms, fandoms i am (kind of) active in are hetalia, scp, dnd, genshin, pjo, bg3, apothecary diaries, jrwi riptide and csm (list is prone to updating because fandom is my support system) (you wont see my art for most of them but the brainworms are there and sometimes i let them take over)

old fandoms or the fandoms i lurk in (i visit them often): eddsworld, demon slayer, pokemon, vocaloid and wof. (also prone to updates as i remember stuff)

note : i am still in school and have a life outside the internet so stuff will be delayed (which is why i am only kind of active) (i go missing sometimes i am not dead life is just lifing for me)

Do not say anything about how cringe I am I know trust me (it’s a coping mechanism lol)

if you're concerned, you're very right to be. I am very incoherent (most of my life updates have actually devolved into cries for help, please talk to me)

also if you don't like my art or ships just leave(any critique about anything i make shoots a bazooka straight into my heart and behind the screen i crumble into a cartoonish pile of ashes and bones as i stare at the screen blurred by tears) (unless I ask for critique then i brought this on myself and i’ll walk it off don't worry)

(Both of my personas)

My flags (might be updated)

[wrencatte]

oooh do you mind telling us more about leverage, possession, and babs and jay fear?

<3

ohhh the leverage one is fun! I don't have my roles anymore cos I'd posted that on twitter and I have deactivated my twitter (and i might be deleted by now I think?) but I wanted to try my hand at it. The relationships are both similar to canon and tweaked with Bruce playing more mentor than dad mode, but everyone else is found family.

“Batman is dead.” It’s said matter-of-factly, not an even a hint of emotion. Dick knows better though, he can hear the frustration and annoyance, the slight hint of tears from them both, a tinge of legitimate sadness. “You up for a job?” Dick leans back until the chair is touching the ground with two leg, aviators dangling from between his fingers as he lifts his coffee to his lips without drinking. He watches his target from his peripherals, giving off the air of a bored tourist who only came here because of the reviews and now has an unwanted call. The unwanted part is completely true. Batman is dead. Dick can’t wrap his head around it. “What happened?” he murmurs. Barbara sighs, it crackles over the line. “Bad intel,” she says. “It didn’t come from me. He didn’t check it with me. Batman’s burned. Bruce went underground.” “Damn.”

Possession is - this one is funny now because of an ask i got a week ish ago telling me about ghouls just wanna have fun. It was Jason doing a "hunting down a magic artifact and it happens to be in Blud" and gets some nasty side effects. magic case fic with Jason & Dick batbros

Dick slips through his window with well practice eased and – freezes halfway through, instantly on edge. He can’t say why. Just feels his skin prickle, his hair standing on end, his gut screaming at him to listen. His leading leg is still bent awkwardly on the sill, and he quiets his entrance even more as he enters the apartment. He creeps through his own living room on the balls of his feet, pulling out one escrima. He’d left his kitchen light on before he left and the light is still there, yet – the rest of his apartment seems darker than it should be. Shadows elongating. The spot of light spilling through the doorway shrinks with every step he takes. Something is in his apartment. A soft click has his escrima humming faintly. It sounds loud in the smothering, encompassing unease of his surroundings – he almost wants to call it abyssal – but he’ll take the risk. It’s not like the was quiet when he opened the window. He slides to the wall and peeks around the corner. A shadow looms over his stove. Smoke drifts from its hair like the remnants of a banked fire, pools around its feet in ashy clouds. A void of grey and black in the middle of his lit kitchen. Dick swallows and flicks the light – off –  and the figure turns, around, eyes flashing – then on, and – “Sup, Dickhead,” Jason says casually, body pulled together, smoke gone like it was never there. Dick lets out a breath. His brother leans against the L in the countertop, dressed down in a graphic tee Dick swears is his, jeans, and biker boots. He looks okay, except for the scrap on his jaw and the dark bags under his eyes. “You’re back sooner than I thought.” “What the hell, Jace,” Dick breathes out. Jason shrugs. “Refilled your fridge, it was lookin’ kinda pathetic.” Dick doesn’t drop his escrima. He tightens his grip and holds it higher as he inches into the room, still on edge. “You’re trying to eat grass that isn’t there,” he offers. He snorts. “Why don’t you give it a chance to grow?” he replies in the same sing-song voice he’s been doing since he was fourteen and he was both whiny and ecstatic about the chosen code phrase. He wanted something cooler, but Bruce had maintained it needed to be obscure enough.

Babs & Jay fear was going to be a 2022 whumptober fill that I just haven't been able to wrap my head around. Two people who suffered in the hands of the Joker, comforting and bonding with Jason dosed with fear gas

Nothing can catch Barbara by surprise anymore. Well, nothing can catch her by surprise in her own home. Not even Cass at her sneakiest since her last system update. Her new sensors are working better than expected. It settles something deep in her bones, that knowledge, that security. Her hyper vigilance has lessened over the years, certainly lower than any of the other Bats, and has found she’s all the better for it – sleeping better, relaxing more, finding herself able to juggle everyday routines on top of her night life better, just general things Babs hadn’t really noticed she struggled with until she wasn’t anymore. She’s still vigilant. After all, she’s Oracle. But it’s something useful now instead of…of debilitating. Instead of being anxious and paranoid in her own home, it just makes her aware. It makes her not flinch, keeps her heartrate steady, when her alarms go off, indicating someone slipping through a window up in the Clock Tower’s loft where she keeps her Oracle business. She has a set up closer to her living spaces, but the real work is done upstairs. The beep is a friendly one, registered for her family both in and out of the mask. She finishes making her coffee, pouring it into a thermos and grabbing an extra mug. There’s a small kitchenette up there too. Today was going to be a day off – which is why she’s down here instead of well into overseeing the night patrols. (It’s never too late for coffee.) Before Babs can head to the elevator, though, her ever present earpiece clicks on. “Hey,” Tim sounds breathless. “Sorry, I know you’re off. But do you think you can track Red Hood? We were taking care of some fear gas and he got hit with some then disappeared.” Her brows furrow then – oh. She rolls into the elevator and hits the button, thoughts whirling. “No need. I know where he is.”

[stargazer0001]

there is something deeply wrong with me but I dont know what it is

like bestie im not talented im traumatized. Im not wasting a gift im trying to keep myself from plunging a knife in my chest and bleeding out in my bed. Like void, please shut the fuck up.

but then when other people vent to me, even if I TRY to care, I just dont. Like im sorry. I want you to feel better. But wtf am I meant to do. Like sorrows, sorrows, but I cant even deal with my own emotions what makes you think I can help with yours???????? And then I TRY. I TRY to help knowing that I cant, I TRY to care even though I dont, I TRY to make it known that I want them to feel loved and cared for, but nothing works. And then I feel like a piece of shit who deserves to rot away in a corner for all eternity!!!

Oh and speaking of rotting away, SCHOOL. I can't pay attention. Like if its not interesting I just zone out and start questioning my reality. And then im like 'wtf are we doing now'. Its actual torture what. And when I TRY to pay attention and actually LEARN I literally just end up drawing on my paper or my mind starts to wander. BUT THEN THE FUCKING THINGS MY TEACHERS ARE SAYING MAKE NO SENSE!! LIKE GIRLIE HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO KNOW WHAT TO DO IF YOU DIDN'T TAKE ME THROUGH A THOROUGH STEP MY STEP PROCESS HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DO THIS. And then I DONT SPEAK UP BECAUSE I WOULD RATHER HAVE MY HAND CHOPPED OFF THEN SPEAK TO A TEACHER. Like. Then, everyone else seems to immediately understand everything?? Some people talk back to teachers??? Some people WANT to talk to teachers??? Who are you and how. Oh and then my classmates??? Literally horrible. I want them to die. Thankfully i have a couple friends in my classes which makes it a bit more bearable, but NO KEENAN OR WHATEVER THE FUCK YOUR NAME IS, STOP DANCING AND SCREAMING, STOP BEING SO UNBEARABLE, STOP BEING A DICK. LIKE DUDE I BET YOU DONT EVEN GOT ONE. LITERALLY STOP BEING AN ASSHOLE. And its this one certain friend group who is actually the WORST. Like im TRYING to pay attention and then all of a sudden one of these kids starts yelling at another, stuff is thrown, and nothing gets done. BUT THEN THE TEACHERS DO NOTHING. THEY DONT CARE. BUT THEN WHEN SOMEBODY ELSE TALKS EVEN ONCE ITS IMMIDIATELY PRINCIPLES OFFICE???? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH EVERYONE IM ACTUALLY GOING INSANE SOMEBODY PLEASE JUST KILL ME.

oh and then out of school isn't even better at all. I just want to waste away in my room. Everything always hurts and I just want to be with friends but I know that nobody can or wants to hang out with a sad waste of oxygen like me. And then when im trying to go to bed I just hear the crashing of glass, my parents having a screaming match, and then my mom going back to drinking her sorrows away while my dad continues to try and sleep. Like please im so tired just let me go into my happy place and attempt to die in my sleep. And then whenever its even around 6:00 my mom immediately starts acting drunk even if she's had nothing so what the fuck is up with that. And then she tries to gaslight me into doing things??? Like at this point im immune. I dont even give any fucks anymore because I tried doing that and it just got me hurt. So why even care anymore. So what the fuck is the point in trying to live laugh love when I just wanna off myself. Like no. Die cry hate is my new motto at this point.

and then, to top it all off, if I try venting ANYTHING to the one person I know who understands, he just asks 'oh, is it your time of the month?'

like please just kill me at this point. Take me out of the hell called living. Im so close to just dying please help.

[adultswim2021]

Robot Chicken #44: “Rabbits on a Roller Coaster” | August 26, 2007 - 11:30PM | S03E3

“The Worst Halloween” is about a boy who gets stuck with a Pink Power Ranger costume on Halloween. He has a bad night, including an almost-rape and finding out that his mom died. Seth called this one one of his favorite sketches. The writer of the sketch said he wrote it without any idea of where it was going and that “it shows”. I agree. Not particularly funny!

I don’t normally highlight quick channel change gags unless they actually make me laugh BUT the Judge banging a gavel only to have his bench turn into a Wack-A-Mole game honestly did make me laugh. The animation is great, and the gag worked for me. Sorry.

“Turbo Teen” is a parody of a relatively obscure Saturday Morning show of the same name where a teenager can turn into a car. In this one he’s drunk leaving a college party. When he becomes a car, a number of terrible things happen to him until he’s crushed into a cube. He changes back briefly and we see him now dismembered and mangled. For some reason I remember seeing this sketch randomly. Like the little bit where he’s in that abstract void writhing around was in my brain already. Most sketches on this show are just “character gets hurt over and over” and this is one of those.

“Dick Tracy’s a Dick” is about Dick Tracy off-handedly giving mean-spirited nicknames to his fellow police officers who didn’t ask for them. Honestly, this is a pretty funny premise. I should’ve guessed the punchline of the sketch before it happened, but this show has a way of lulling me into assuming nothing on it will make me laugh. I actually laughed at this sketch. I laughed twice at this episode. WOW. Not sure how it stacks up to Tracey Zooms In. 

“Trakker in Love” is the finale, and it’s over three minutes long. It feels more like two sketches jammed together, starting with a sequence where a younger character (I didn’t watch M.A.S.K. as a kid, sorry) is getting in trouble for having thrown a party there the previous night. The next scene feels like the beginning of a new sketch, involving one of the members of M.A.S.K. internet dating a fat woman. This one really sucks, and doesn’t seem to have much of a central idea. It feels ridiculous to say this about a show I’ve gone on the record of not liking very much, but it truly drags the episode down. 

After the credits is a parody of Joss Wheadon’s “Mutant Enemy Productions” vanity card. I remember seeing the “Mutant Enemy Productions" logo before, but I don’t remember why or where. I’m guessing one of his shows aired before something else I liked? Anyway, its not all that funny, just sorta relies on knowing the reference.

And that’s this one. Whew! Nasty show!

EPHEMERA CORNER

These commercials are from earlier in August, but it’s been a while since I linked to a random youtube:

MAIL BAG

I keep forgetting to address my precious mail baggers. I am so sorry. I cherish you all.

please do a top 10 for saul of the molemen!

Literally impossible. No way.

“Wildly unfunny” I bet you one of them yank fellas that just can’t understand the intricacies of Georgian life. I wish I could help you enjoy squidbillies, but the fact is you’re too much a dumsumbitch.

What is this even quoting? I literally searched all of my Squidbillies posts for the phrase “wildly unfunny” and it the only thing that came up was I said it in a Mail Bag referring to Minoriteam. Shut up please! I even *sorta* like Squidbillies

Is that the same comic con where you filmed yourself calling the aliens from Star Trek "f*ggots" because they were doing a Q&A?

This is in reference to my post about Tim & Eric Awesomecon/Comic-con 2007. No. How dare you. First of all, that wasn’t me. Second of all, that was at Great America theme park. GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT

[thuidium-delicatulum]

You have a system? Could you maybe do a factfile thing so we know who’s who? Only if you’re comfortable with it of course :)

YEAH OFC!

okay so there are seven of us!

jack: (me) ig the host, probably the most mentally ill, really likes plants and music, he/moss (sometimes i get called jay or jayden as nicknames)

silas: forest kid, doesnt have much emotion but loves plants, likes void so much even though everyone else dislikes them, he/they (silas used to be called forest so sometimes we still call them that)

void: pretty much no emotion, very calm all the time, often jumps in when one of us gets panicked, is only really nice to silas, they/it

megan: little kid, seven years old, very easily changeable emotions (ie sometimes she wont talk for days and cries every time she fronts, or shes incredibly excitable and constantly running around and laughing), loves rainbows and hair clips and sleeping, often fronts when we feel either really vulnerable or really really safe, she/her (i usually refer to her as kiddo or the little kid or just something like that)

ash: asshole, makes rules that we have to follow or he threatens to hurt us, is such a dick to megan, has all of the anger that the others block out, he/him (he doesn't get nicknames although sometimes i call him the scary kid)

julien: dark academia 19 year old, looks after us, likes latin and poetry and plants, sometimes we'll spell his name julien and other times julian (i think it might depend on mood i dont know), he/him (megan calls him jule or jules a lot and its catching on with the others as well which he doesnt care about)

okay um thats everyone in this head! i think we're an osdd 1-b system, and megan has a blog (although i wont share it because she says kind of embarassing shit)

thanks for the ask, strange anonymous person!

[scornocopia]

love love love making art hate hate hate that it’s my only redeeming quality . i feel like. coggy. and also like .it’s totes impossible to make something finished that i can actually ……. look at or reread without seeing the plethora of fundamental issues with. i mean all art has issues no matter how seemingly perfect that’s just how it is. and even stuff with quote unquote no (impossible) or minimal (less impossible) issues definitely has been revised to hell and back to polish the precious thing clean and shake the issue fleas off its coat. i don’t know why i hold my current self to such a high standard as if i’m gonna die tomorrow and there’s absolutely no room for growth or improvement or fixing the fuck ups. i feel like growing up glued to a screen and also living for other people has seriously ripped up my core. ‘the thing about people pleasers is that they often end up pleasing no one’ i forgot where i heard that but yeah basically. the likes make me feel good and one like from a mutual or person who’s user i remember on my draws is like 17298474 likes to me but i just wish i never got into the framework of Draw thing, post, wait for attention, draw thing, post, wait for attention, draw thing, becayse i genuinely do enjoy drawing and making stuff so much it’s why i have a billion unposted pictures of my wife to swoon over oh my god she’s so beautiful and awesome that lady is gonna be the death of me and i’d be perfectly fine with that but i seriously just. feel like i’m complaining about something that i did to myself which is essentially how i feel about every single problem. oh you’re bitching about a headache from lack of caffeine as if you didn’t get yourself hooked on that shit in middle school. oh you’re bitching about your hazy memories that are barely memories as if you didn’t choose to do the heroin or coke or meth or drink the booze or eat all that xanax and molly. oh you’re bitching about how you feel betrayed as if you didn’t choose to respond to your groomer’s FUCKING GOOGLE DOC APOLOGY SHE SENT YOU AFTER GETTING CAUGHT not before you called her out AFTER. and you still thought it sound. and you still thought she could’ve changed. and you still thought she ever cared about uou. and you still love her because of course, she was STILL the first person to ever make you feel useful. oh you’re bitching about how your pelvic floor dysfunction is most likely abuse inflicted as if you didn’t choose to crawl into an actual fucking monster’s bed at 13 and stay there for a couple years too long. oh you’re bitching about how hollow and used you feel as if you didn’t choose to whore yourself out and let dick after dick after dick after dick fill the she made void. oh you’re bitching about how disgusting your kinks and fetishes make you feel as if you didn’t ok this started out as an art ramble and derailed into unrelated victim blaming myself pretty quick Which i know is unhealthy and irrational. i know deep. well, not even deep down i jsut Know that some things were out of my control and don’t make me any less of a person or bad or stupid but i think i just needed to rapid fire that off to make myself see how fucking dogshit and wrong it is to think that way. with that being said i do still choose to submit myself and myart to a couple algorithmic hellscapes in a sorry attempt to get a like from someone who doesn’t care if i live or die, but that’s content BABY. THATS CONCRETE BABY. i wonder if the art to csa derailment has anything to do with the fact that no one gave a shitting fuck about my stupid furry drawings besides a literal kiddy diddler. whatever i’ll think qbout it more later as to not explode my brain i think my brain needs a little silence emptiness anyway tldr for myself later;boohoo boohoo look at me i feel a little less insane after insanemaxxing. also stop being a bitch to the child you once were you fucking actual unhinged dick it makes you irrationally shameful and is unproductive to any possible improvement.

[bigswordenergy]

About/BYF

!!MINORS DNI. 18+ ONLY!!

Dov, it/its (preferred), he/him (aux, use in gendered languages e.g. German/Yiddish), gay dude, white, Jewish (Renewal, Bundist), UK. This is both a personal blog and RP hub. I will probably immediately forget media recommendations and also I'm very picky about music. Untagged venting and recovery posting will happen sometimes but it’s never gonna be anything self injury related.

Go HERE to help some people get esims.

Basic interaction rules: I will block if you're hateful (including just mean spirited harassment), selling crypto/pyramid schemes, use generative AI/LLMs or try to bring me drama or discourse. I don't do call-outs or ship discourse, I can just block people, you should too. Oh, and if you're a dick to my friends or a fandom gatekeeper? BYE.

Things I post a fair amount of: Vampire The Masquerade, Elden Ring, Dark Souls, animals, nature, silly nonsense, yelling at the void, art, Yiddishkeit, mild NSFW, dark and spooky things, heavy metal

RP Blog stuff:

Classic World of Darkness-based. Anything relatively compatible is fine. I do interact with some 5e blogs but am not using their metaplot, and please just don’t do edition evangelism TYVM unless you want a detailed account of my terrible experiences.

General warning for: adult humour, implied sexual themes, combat, descriptions of gore, drug use, mental illness, monsterfucking implications, canon divergence, overpowered characters

[OC list under construction, will add when my executive function is better]

NO IRL MINORS, no child characters either. My content isn't child-friendly. Seriously, don't do cringe culture at me, in general. If you're playing a fascist/TERF/similar kind of asshole, I will not engage, even if you don't believe those things IRL. No forcefem/misgender kink. I don't respond to automatic IC hostility, it's not fun, it just makes me feel bad for playing "cringe" characters that people hate. I will not engage if you're doing pregnancy stuff because I don't wanna deal with pregnancy or parasites. I do multi-ship, so keep that in mind.

If you wanna do something that's longer-form or will have long-term effects, don't be scared to message me, we can set something up. Romance is fine, combat is fine, but WITH COMMUNICATION beforehand.

[charcherry-weekly]

Charcherry Weekly - Issue 213

Hello everyone, Mage of Light Nick Card here. After a cool streak, its back to being hot again. Back to school is approaching and I can only hope these kids have proper transportation in time.

Since the incident at

The Archives,

there have been heightened concerns about the safety of The Railway, particularly from its workers. As a result, the workers of the Railway called for a strike.

Slowly but surely over the course of the week, stops and lines gradually went offline over the course of the week. Even the Ancient Quarry battle subway carriage joined the picket line! (I do wonder if it houses a rotom or something...)

This came to a head on thursday, when even the DTA lines began to go down in solidarity with the strikers, to the point that a number of DTA-funded assets were reverted to their initial state (particularly Charcherry North and The Park, the latter of which was no longer even open to the public due to past incident). The Railway Board then blamed the DTA for allegedly causing everything, which was the final straw.

It was only once all known lines went offline that a team could be assembled to negotiate with The Board in charge of The Railway. The team included Desertian President Witch of Time Katyleen "The Wolf" Kitten, Train driver Skye, as well as Winged Maid of Void Skye Macdonald, Desertian Government Union Steward Electrolis, Railway Union representative Jacob Richards, Your dear newsletter writer, and two private individuals, one of which was there at the request of the Queen of Air and Darkness Mab of the Winter court of the Fae. Train Driver Skye drove the party there in a void bus, to a void-y version of Milton Keynes in the middle of nowhere, only encountering a single (un)identifiable entity on the way there. Fortunately, Train driver Skye is also an excellent bus driver.

Eventually, the party arrived at the building where The Board resided. It was as if nobody had bothered to pay any of the bills for it ever. We entered the cold and dark building, finding great difficulty in ascending, due to the non-working elevator, as well as the rusted, locked, and blocked door to the stairs. Eventually, we managed to find a way to the stairs and begun climbing. It felt like it had taken forever. It was near the top that we met up with one of the private individuals, having been summoned by Winged Maid of Void Skye. We continued towards the top, where a monument to The Railway's progress and The Board's failures awaited us. We gazed upon it for a moment, preparing to enter

The Boardroom.

With confidence despite the darkness, we faced The Board together. The members of the Board introduced themselves as Jill Parsons, Jack Ford, and Dick Beeching. Katie had clearly done her homework, because she squarely schooled them on various topical incidents. Meanwhile, RWU rep. Jacob presented an absolute laundry list of every trial run that was determined a failure but was ignored by those in power. This caused The Board members to snap back, but your dear newsletter writer managed to say just the right thing to stop them in their tracks. By the grace of the Light that I am purview to, I revealed that they had in fact looked at the reports and ignored their warnings, with the intention to blame eachother to try and get out of harm's way. It managed to be so accurate that they instantly gave up and listened to our demands. It was also determined that The Board members weren't even among the living--they were a conglomerate of british rail spirits, comprised of all the grief of the Railway's past failures.

Determining that they no longer held any power over the Railway any longer, the party considered what to do with The Board. Eventually, it was decided that they would be sent to spend the rest of their afterlives in a dreambubble. The Skyes, Skitis (summoned last minute by Winged Skye), and a private individual handled the safe delivery together. Meanwhile, the rest of the party had to be evacuated from the now-crumbling building. Katie used her time powers to make an escape, using the anchor method to arrive back at Desertia Station. Apparently she must have picked up something from there to make the leap.

With The Board squarely defeated, we announced that the union had gained control of The Railway, thus ending the strike with all demands met.

Currently, The Railway is undergoing repairs to re-open as many lines as possible, within safe means. Negotiations and new contract drafting is currently underway between the DTA and the co-op Railway to decide how things will be handled from now on. It is likely that Queen Mab and/or her appointed representative will get involved at some point. Her Enigmatic Resiliency will also need to get involved for matters pertaining to SCART's connection to the greater railway.

In the meantime, please be patient with repairs and re-openings, its being worked on.

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This week’s known market stands in Desertia Town:

DTA train ticket stand?

Katie’s potion stand (Not available to plitlanders due to regulations, available to all others however)

shinyjiggly pokesnacks stand (also has a Unity Village location!)

Brae's produce stall:

- Potted vegetables

- Jarred vegetables

- Various jams

- Hisuian herbs (medicinal leek, pep-up plant, king's leaf)

Traditional Shop

- Whistle, beast (5 gp)

- Scent cloak (20 gp)

- Piton, silent (5 sp)

- Smith's Tools (20 gp)

I think that does it for this week. I've been working on HyacinthHeld, but its been going slow due to obligations and distractions. I'm just glad that I have proper inspiration for it now.

https://letssosl.boards.net/thread/450/charcherry-weekly-issue-213

[life-of-a-thot]

Reboundville, USA - Population: 1 

Shortly after our little ménage, S and I called it quits for good… at least HE did, and decided it wasn’t important to let me know of this minor change. I can’t pinpoint the event that put the final nail in the coffin for him, but he stopped answering my texts, and calls, and Facebook messages. After a while he decided to just block me on everything, then would periodically decide to unblock me. Being 19, I was confused, heartbroken, and my self-esteem took some hefty damage. I took a few weeks to grieve while perusing Tinder, of course. Though still praying he’d decide to break the no-contact order so I could return to a shitty yet comfortable situation. I couldn’t wait forever though, because a gal has needs (meeting up with strangers to have mediocre sex). Brandon was decent looking, a caramel skinned, freckled, black 30-something bachelor, that loves sneakers and streetwear. He lured me in with the promise of being smoked out, and maybe even being taken shopping in the near future. My dream has always been to find a sugar daddy, so I happily agree to come over. 

His apartment is void of almost all furniture. Its him, a few sad pieces of “art” on the wall, a collection of Jordans - at least 20 pairs - in disarray by the front door, a couch parked in front of a massive flat screen, and table to eat at. And a bed, of course. We sit on the couch, knee to knee, chatting while he loads up a futuristic device we’ll apparently be smoking weed out of. Not long into whatever movie we pretended to watch, he makes his move. Looking back, I started to get a bit uncomfortable in the moment. A 19 year old and 33 year old having sex seemed a bit ludicrous even at my ripe age. His dick was a decent size but wildly deformed, like a wand you’d see a character in a Harry Potter movie wielding, but I sucked it anyway. In the heat of the moment, he told me to change positions; suddenly, something under the mattress sounded like something DEFINITELY broke, and I was too distracted from wondering about the integrity of his bedframe to fully enjoy myself. He finished, and without exchanging many more words, I left. After that night, he would only hit me up from time to time but simultaneously became my most obsessed Instagram follower. He, to this day in 2024, is the first person to view all of my stories, like all my posts, and he still messages me wanting to spoil me by taking me shopping. I don’t think he ever will though.