#because if anyone was ever going to be able to tell her it wasnt her fault it would be him

[elephant-in-the-pride-parade]

ask #2 what head canons do you have about Tom and Mary's relationship

OHHHH A DOWNTON ABBEY QUESTION

Okay okay so i need to acknowledge how feral I am about these two. Also i sorta checked out after the show shoved Mary and skinny chad number 7ish down the aisle (Is his name Henry or something??? the race car driver whatever, fuck him 😆)

(I still dont understand how they expect me to believe that the love of her life dies in a devastating car accident but she would willingly re-marry a race car driver. brain does not compute)

I digress. I think Tom and she develope this insanely deep emotional bond in that first year without their spouses as a result of their shared grief. They each married for love at a time when few others of their social group would have had the chance to do so (Tom is extra isolated on account of he isnt yet accepted into that social group). I think they really heavily depend on eachother in the beginning. someone else who just gets that grief. and also was close to the spouse who died so it's two sides of a coin. they gravitate towards the one other person they feel fully understands them and they help the other A. remember the love who died and B (more in Mary's case) remember what kind of person that love inspired them to be.

And i headcanon that by the time they might be ready for romance again theyve fallen into this inexplicable deep emotional entanglement with the other. it would be incredibly hard to find something more fulfilling. at the same time, transforming that connection into romance would probably be terrifying (would the other want that? would it be a betrayal of Matthew and Sybil to move on together) oodles of grief there.

I think Tom actually goes to Boston at all because he realizes whats happening and it scares him. on the one hand he thinks it isnt fair to mary to hold her back from a romance. on the other hes not quite sure if he could ever move on from Sybil. (And of course be comes back because he cant bear to be away from Mary and figures he can find a way to control the attraction. maybe by committing himself to helping her find new love.)

Which is about where what I headcanon and what the show does diverge. I cant wrap by head around her marrying skinny man number 7. i just cant. Husband material is right there at the breakfast table with her. Why would she go for Henry when she already has Tom?

I also think theyre good for eachother okay! they encourage and empower eachother. She helps him navigate the code switching he needs to do to be a part of the peerage. he helps her find her way out of the constricting box the peerage has always pressured her to conform to. Him being estate agent opens the door for her to take control over it. theirs is a partnership. running the whole thing together. beause he respects her opinion and welcomes her to the table as an equal, it effectively gives her the control over her home shes always felt like she cant have due to her sex.

So in my headcanon she either dumps skinny man or has an unhappy marriage to skinny man that prompts Tom and she to have a conversation about what they really want. And then they would get together And i could frankly read stories about them getting together foreverrr.

[weirdmageddon]

i love these tags this person is so right

actually, can you imagine if dave was raised by B1 roxy?

i wanna get into this actually

(ok i had to spend a few hours rewriting this because IT DIDNT FUCKING SAVE AFTER FIVE HOURS OF WRITING WHEN MY COMPUTER UPDATED WHILE I WAS AFK so it would mean a lot to show this post some appreciation. i LOVEEE hearing what other people have to say)

even though these things mom does are presented in an extravagant, kitsch, jokey way, her intentions always came from a place of sincerity. she is simply Funnie

but rose reads too far into it and assumes things that aren't there, that her mother is passive-aggressively feigning interest in rose's interests simply because the things she does are so extra. "why do all of this if not to mock me"

im telling you right now if dave lived in this household he wouldn't assume antagonism, he'd go,

don’t forget who LITERALLY patented tangible jpeg artifacts as their post-scratch adult self and scattered shitty scummed up statue of liberties all over the planet. theres no way some of that overboard artful shit wasnt post-ironic / circling back around to genuine funny sincerity

dave's natural state is funny sincerity like roxy. he's had the natural capacity for this type of humor from the start and this is the direction he goes towards when he grows out of his brother's shadow by the end of the comic. dave and roxy share an earnest “so bad its good” type of humor

(lots more under the cut; the length of this meta analysis just got unwieldly with all the pictures and whatnot)

despite the alcoholism, roxy is a supportive mother. she's not the ideal guardian but hells of a lot more supportive of her kid than bro is. if she knew dave's interests she would totally indulge in them with some over the top silly goofy haha shit as a genuine gesture simply because she loves him

rose isn't too keen on it though. but she is more similar to dirk in her natural state of thinking of overthinking shit and assuming the worst, like the tags said

and yes dave got the sweet cuddly yet sometimes backhanded ouppy gene from roxy, probably even moreso lol

roxy's even said rose "sounds like girl dirk"

side tangent here, but this is something i wanna talk about.

i dont think bro should ever be in custody of children ever but if theres anyone who would be up to the task it's rose probably. i know she'd be able to keep up with him. not only does she have a defined personality (dave is more malleable and absorbs his environment like a sponge), if anyone can pick apart B1 dirk's batshit brain and probably be right on the money it's her. lil cal has been pumping patriarchal nonsense into bro's head and rose would be able to bring the fucking facts to the table without losing her own and being a living example of a badass little girl. i also don't think bro would try to force masculine roles onto rose like he did with dave, seeing as she is a girl, so she would actually have more of a leg up and get some passes that dave was never afforded. and rose wouldn't stand idly and accept any bullshit; she is no doormat. and i think this would earn bro's respect

but anyway, from this, couldn't we conclude roxy "sounds like girl dave"?

yeah okay. we havent even gotten into their penchant for funny typos or misspeaks, deliberate or otherwise

so, dave's environment

the sentiment "god you hope you can be as good as your bro at this some day" might have been genuine at the time when he idolized bro but of course he's not able to express that in any sort of sincere fashion because he's in dirk's fucking household. and this level 10 irony shit isnt doing dave any favors

his role models were the Internet and a vague idea of what Bro was like. So he built up his facade based on irony–not the literary definition of irony, as Rose might be quick to point out, but a popular concept of irony based on the idea that things that didn’t make sense actually made sense in some roundabout way. As a master of irony, Dave probably reasoned, he could see in a way other people couldn’t why a world that was scary and didn’t make sense really did make sense, and could therefore convince those people that he was superior to them. And he would wield his knowledge to maintain the appearance of superiority by calling everything ironic and pretending he didn’t care about things that didn’t make sense, and he would use walls of vaguely rhyming words to keep everyone at arm’s length so they wouldn’t discover his insecurities (source)

roxy's style is the embodiment of post-irony. being raised by mom lalonde would be like being raised by joel vinesauce ok

what can i say ….. (getting meta about this actually, hussie got these jpeg wizard wallpapers from a spyware website. link takes some time to load because internet archive)

rose is quick to read post-irony as actually being a joke/insincere, which in bro's case would be true. but i believe dave's natural instinct, outside of the influence of bro, is to read post-irony as genuine, which is exactly how mom serves it. we see this as early as act 3 from him; he understands her motives better than rose does herself:

and in act 6 intermission 2 i think it's pretty clear

but the thing is, it's always genuine from her. dave wouldn't have to second guess it because he's not one to naturally second guess someone's sincerity; that was learned due to his bro being virtually unassailable

there two types of ironies at play here:

seems like a joke, is actually genuine (roxy)

doesnt seem like a joke, is actually a joke (dirk)

you can make the argument that the second is is more psychologically destructive because it makes you question the reality of what is genuine sentiment and what isn't. dave never knew what was genuine and what was irony so he just sort of existed in this sincerity-ironic limbo and always did the opposite of what he genuinely felt on principle even if it always did originate from a genuine place.

"it just a joke bro i was just being ironic i dont actually x" is so much more trust-breaking and psychologically damaging than "wait are you being serious" / "i am being so fucking fr rn davy gravy" / "ok thats actually pretty fucking awesome. giant ass wizard statue" / "RIGHT"

how much about dave would change do you think? his character arc would be completely different for one thing, i think he'd have it good aside from mom's alcohol issues. he'd be left with the sweet and funny parts of him that we see at the end of the comic. the fake coolguy stuff is out, but this remains. this is dave in his element and we see it as early as act 1

he'd probably have no shades growing up in the lalonde residence* either cause those were given to him by bro straight out of the crater as an extension of his own cool image. and john gave dave ben stiller’s aviators for his 13th birthday to replace them so he could “spread his wings”

dave said he was wearing them for the ironies but i kind of doubt it. maybe post-irony but there was some reacharound to it being genuine because dave never put those pointy anime shades on his face again.

*though... it’s kind of hard to imagine him without his shades at all? B2 dave still got stiller’s shades from stiller himself so maybe getting them is a universal constant. i can imagine mom getting him them as a birthday gift cause shes pretty wealthy and probably could buy it out in an auction. but also itd be cool if john still gave him it as a gift

dave is actually a lot more genuine and easy to read than he lets on even when grappling with his upbringing with B1 dirk (again, see this post). this can be seen all throughout he comic but a good example is the evolution of thoughts about his interest in the preserved dead things in his room:

if B1 roxy was dave's guardian he probably WOULD have pursued paleontology because she wouldve indulged him in it and probably find it cool and worthwhile to pursue, instead of allowing dave to flounder under ironic detachment, being poisoned by irony to the point of gaslighting himself into believing he doesnt actually believe he thinks this shit is cool. even if it was indulged in this such a way; a superficially kitsch and ironic appearing presentation, it comes from a genuine place and inspires genuine interest. just read the comments.

basically, i think if B1 roxy raised dave, their relationship would have a surface level appearance of being bizarre or over-the-top but they’d have an unsaid mutual understanding that it’s completely in earnest and just build on each other's funny and absurd gestures of affection. rather than seeing it as one-upping each other, it'd more like collaboration of some silly bullshit that you take a step back and look at full and just say, "fucking incredible"

speaking of paleontology, mom had the proto-ectobiology lab. maybe they'd be able to use the equipment to appearify paradox ghost imprints of the dead shit to create paradox clones of things from the cambrian era??? sounds like a fun mother son bonding activity. and theyd actually put the sciencey shit in the household to use

oh god i know exactly the kinds of music shed listen too also growing up as a teen in the 80s. she on that (post)-punk/art rock/new wave/new romantic mtv stuff. XTC shit fr. this is a B-52S HOUSEHOLD. maybe the associates for the campy melodramatic flair. so he gets to keep the record on his shirt cause he is an enjoyer of the shit in her vinyl collection. dave would still gravitate towards musical expression and music itself but of more variety outside of just rap, with an 80s-90s, even 70s flavor due to mom’s influence. see this for perhaps a glimpse. ​she probably visited new york city a lot for business trips and because the music scene was cool as hell around that time, imports came straight from jfk airport, she probably got in on that a bit and have remnants in the form of vinyls and cassettes. in this way she could be distributing void to dave (influencing him with forgotten / presently irrelevant music). now he can REALLY rave about bands none of his friends have heard of. “hey davy grvay watcha listenin to” (he holds up vinyl cover) “omg snakefinger”

btw dave lalonde would look like this to me

[3lyvshiro]

𐙚 ⋆₊˚ 4:44..ᐟ

suna rintaro and yn ln were perfect for eachother.

It wasnt unusual for people to find suna cold and intimidating. understandably, i mean it wasnt exactly like he was rubbing elbows with everyone.. and his height at the ripe age of 17 did nothing to help.

thats why it didnt surprise suna when atsumu told him of the girls that approached him earlier that day, first years, he mentioned, shyly blushing and asking him if suna-senpai was single.

Atsumu groaned as he retold the story to Suna, muttering about how he had to shut them down for him. He didnt know if they were just unaware, or didnt get the memo, but No, Suna is not single. Suna is very much taken. everyone knows suna was taken. Atsumu grimaced.

He didnt need to wonder why these juniors couldnt just approach him themselves, because he already knew why. anyone who observes suna rintaro can easily tell he was unemotional and standoffish.

Suna is an objectively unnapproachable guy.

That, paired with his girlfriend who was, if possible, a hundred times colder than he was. she's the literal ice queen of inarizaki.

Atsumu thought back to every time he's interacted wih her. It wasnt like she was completely a bitch or something, of course not. But even if she was, he'd rather chop his tongue off than say that to her face. And it wasnt like she was uptight or couldnt joke around or something like that. yn was actually pretty fun. he deduced that from when suna brought her with him on a hangout with the boys, only for him to ditch them to go on a date with her.

from their minimal interactions, atsumu will admit, yn is fun. she's joked around eith him before, and he's seen her playfully poke fun at others. she's just generally intimidating and unnapproachable.

thats why It was easy to assume that the relationship between suna and yn would be bland and lack romance and emotions or whatever.

Many people think that they either treat eachother horribly, or that theyre in a fake relationship. Seeing two of the most standoffish people together, romantically, was bound to raise some eyebrows.

atsumu forgets that not everyone knows the exact story of how suna and yn came to be. People who arent close with suna wouldnt know.

they wouldnt know of how shy and borderline lame suna was, back when he was still crushing on yn.

they wouldnt know of the ratio from suna before yn to suna after yn. he noticably got happier, to the point it was literally so hard not to notice.

they wouldnt know of the massive crush suna had on her. it was the fattest crush ever, and god, they wouldnt even suspect that he was the one between them who texted first, who approached the other first, who made the first move. the guy moved mountains just to get closer to her.

suna rintaro was so ridiculously down bad.

thats why, atsumu was sure. no one knows shit about suna and yn. they can say what they want about the relationship being bland or lacking passion, but only the people most close to suna would know.

only they'd know of how hard he fell for yn.

only they'd know of how passionate suna is for yn.

only they'd know how serious suna is about her.

only theyd be able to see the look he gets in his eyes whenever his eyes are on her.

only they see that- that smile he gets on his face whenever he gets to be with her.

yeeep. atsumu is sure.

suna rintaro is not standoffish. not when he looks at his girl with so many emotions its disgusting. not when all the walls around him crumble down at the sight of his girl. suna may be distant to other people, but its completely different when its her.

the same thing goes for yn too. its not true that shes unemotional because how could she, when she looks at suna like he hung up the stars for her. how could she, when her face absolutely lights up every time she gets to be with her boyfriend?

yn ln is not unapproachable. how could she be, when she managed to get suna rintaro to make the first move on her, to text her first, to take the lead in their relationship?

suna and yn are a match made in heaven.

hey peanuts 💓back w my suna x cold!reader agenda@#?#? omg the gap between this post and my last post

and if u enjoyed, pls dont forget to reblog! comments, feedback and reblogs are always so so so appreciated!!!🤍🤍🤍

[gh0stcav3]

hey was edyn ever made aware of the fact finns alive. bc like i genuinely cant remember but id have to assume she wasnt. im kinda blanking but i dont think gil, or anyone else, ever had a moment to tell her about that. that he’s alive and theyve been able to talk to him. how much did gil and edyn even know about what happened to him to begin with? i doubt the elders, or really anyone really was all too happy that he went up to the surface. as far as we’ve seen the tidestriders are the only tritons that live in(on?) the oversea. gil didn’t even leave because he wanted to, and if he hadn’t left edyn wouldn’t have either. which leaves finn being the only one to leave out of actually wanting to. are there rules about going to the oversea? or is it simply distrust of the people above that leads tritons and other people of the undersea to staying. i feel like its not unlikely that finns name became only talked about in hushed whispers, as someone who’d gone against the undersea. gil mentions early on that he vaguely knows of finn being on a ship and something happening. do you think the elders twisted the story into something much worse to try and convince gillion that the oversea was bad, a place of awful people? do you think edyn wonders what happened to her grandfather? because it’s not like anyone really knows exactly what happened to the black rose pirates, not even those of them who survived.

[elrielffs]

Can you please explain these scenes? When I first read the bonus chapter, i didnt look too much into it because I was enjoying the scene of elain and azriel. that wasnt until i joined this fandom and realized how hated they are.

•Elain sucked in a soft breath that whispered over his skin. His shadows skittered back at the sound. They'd always been prone to vanish when she was around.• Some people make this as something bad, why?

•Azriel ignored the question. "The Cauldron chose three sisters. Tell me how it's possible that my two brothers are with two of those sisters, yet the third was given to another." He had never before dared speak the words aloud.• I heard people say he's entitled to her because his brothers got the other two sisters? again, I never paid attention to this at all and didnt think much of it.

Look, now with the convo with gwyn. it was cute little thing, i didnt think much of it and thought it was whatever (off topic. im just so used to friendships in the boys of tommen series that i didnt think of it as romantic 😭 like joey and lizzie idk) it really shocked me to find out they were one of the most popular ships. but please explain!

Sure anon!

To the first, antis try to make like Azriel's shadows disappearing around Elain is a bad thing, that the shadows are a part of him and shouldn't disappear and this means they don't like Elain ergo Elriel incompatible.

But we've seen in the story where Azriel's shadows when not in a standard normal state do disappear when he is more relaxed and around people he trusts.

The shadows don't hate Elain. They lit up across the room at Elain's laughter. They helped Azriel present the necklace to Elain on solstice, when Nesta and Elain argued, the shadows are described as ready to strike at the thought of someone hurting Elain.

To the second. People taking things out of context or twisting it to be bad. Stating that Azriel feels entitled and refers to Elain as "the third". But in the sentence he is talking to about everyone that way: two brothers, two sisters...the third. Not just Elain. Antis just ignore the sentence structure Azriel was using to refer to everyone and hone in on "the third".

This also makes antis think that Azriel feels entitled to Elain and just wants a mate but they have it backwards imo. Azriel isn't questioning his religion, the cauldron, the mother, a mate bond with another male just because he wants a mate and figures "the third" of the Archeron brood should be his like they are collecting Pokemon.

He's asking these questions because of Elain herself. Remember when the brothers first met the sisters. They both stilled. Remember that Azriel has always been drawn and willing to go out of his way to help and be around Elain, remember that Azriel was willing to die to save Elain from Hybern's camp, remember that Azriel knew what was wrong with Elain before a "supposed mate", remember Azriel can smell the mating bond between Azriel and Lucien when he shouldn't be able to.

Remember most of this happened before anyone knew that Nessian were mates or even together. Azriel is questioning the cauldron not only because he is displaying mate like behavior when Elain already had a supposed mate, that she doesn't like or want but because he wants Elain so badly, he wants her to be his mate. He wants Elain to be his mate not because she's the third Archeron sister but because she's Elain.

And to be fair, with mate bonds already being rare, what are the chances that two of the Archeron sisters are mated to two of the most powerful Illyrians ever but the third is not, especially when he really really really wants her to be. I think it's a fair question to ask and is also something SJM is having us ponder...along with the 6 sided star representing balance.

As for the whole scene with Gwyn, others have broken this down more succinctly but basically: Azriel's powers react to Gwyn much like Nesta's did, I believe Gwyn was put in there to crumb that she has more powers that we don't know about (Lightsinger Theory). Spark has been disproven to mean mates as it has been used between non-mated people, people who aren't even couples, and hasn't been used in every mate bond therefore it's a false equivalency.

And my big take away is...if you took the scene where Azriel and Gwyn actually spoke to each other and replaced Azriel or Gwyn with anyone....it's very very platonic. Antis read too much into it because they don't have many scenes for their ship but really, if you inserted Emerie and Azriel, Feyre and Cassian, Mor and Rhysand you would see that it's just a normal conversation that's been twisted and overblown.

And that's basically what happens anytime there's a scene between Elriel or with Gwyn. Antis twist the narrative and make Elriel scenes bad and ignore canon while with Gwyn, any interaction between the two means they are ready for a full blown romance and are so flirty and into each other when...they just aren't.

So there you go, hope that helped clear some things up for you.

[7smiles]

Zero Day is so tragic but the bounds of Cal and Andre's relationship just kills me.

Cal, for the entirety of the movie has already been en route to end his life. He's depressed, outcasted, victimized- going into Zero Day, his plan from the beginning was to take himself our. Zero Day is his suicide.

Andre's reason for Zero Day is revenge, and its why he struggles so much with killing himself at the end of their carnage. The operator tries her best to only appeal to Andre, because Cal is already a lost cause.

Cal follows Andre because he could have only done Zero Day with HIM. Cal convinces Andre to end their lives together, and its because that was the only way Cal wouldve been content in his death.

"I dont think that I, uh, could've done this with anyone else, either," Cal says, after Andre tells him this couldn't have been possible if they hadn't been friends.

And its 100% true for Calvin, because it wasnt going to be anybody else, it was always Andre.

Andre doesn't listen to the phone operator and goes with Calvin because Calvin already gave him everything, and Andre's own death is what he pays to Cal.

If Cal had ended his life on his own, Andre wouldn't have ever been able to escape the effects of that, nor would he be able to move on from the bullying he's already worked up over.

The only way out for them, because Cal already intended to die with or without Zero Day, was to commit their crimes, this is why they are so incredibly insistent that they weren't media influenced and that their actions are equal in part. There are no leaders.

[theriverbeyond]

so i was thinking about this post, specifically the comparison between Ianthe/Babs and Silas/Colum. because on the surface, they're both necromancers whose relationship to their cavalier seems wholly consumptive. but: Silas differs from Ianthe on one big, key point -- he refuses to ascend to lyctorhood. he has been indoctrinated since birth to view his cavalier as only a tool for him; Colum was quite literally made for him, the 8th house breeds batteries, but when the chips are down silas refuses. he tried to kill Ianthe for it!! like, he was the only one in the room who thought what Ianthe did was so fucked up that she should die for it.

and this is so fascinating!! because one could potentially interpret the 8th house's treatment of their cavaliers like Mercymorn trying to innoculate her house against the grief that destroyed her for 10,000 years. she loved Cristabel too much, and she never wanted that to happen to anyone else. but the thing is, I don't think it worked. at best, I can see Silas becoming like Augustine "human plex" the First. you are not immune to grief etc.

and i think this is going to be important like, idk. the 8th house is the only dead Canaan House pair that hasn't yet had their arc concluded. and IMO, i think the 9th house wasnt the only house to have their dynamic be challenged by and radically shift due to the events of GtN!! that scene where Silas invites Gideon to "take tea" and then tells Colum to kill her -- Colum refuses, Silas lets Gideon go, and we never see the conclusion of that fight. and of course, despite refusing to wholly consume his soul, when fighting Ianthe Silas falls back on old habits to steamroll Colum's agency, and ends up opening the path for the River Devil that comes and kills them both. I think it is very intentional that this is framed as a consequence of Silas overriding Colum's agency and treating Colum like a tool and not a person, and I think the rest of their arc is going to address this. in HtN, when Silas fled Harrow's bubble, I am convinced that he went to go find Colum's soul.

im very interested to see where their arc leads re: forgiveness, atonement, etc, especially in the context of Gideon's forgiveness of Harrow in the pool scene, Hot Sauce's forgiveness of Nona, and Ortus & Harrow's mutual forgiveness of each other. how do we make it right when it can never be made right, how can we move forward without ever being able to erase what we have done to each other?

[bucketspammer4life]

☆ how the boxers were as children ☆

Hey besties, sorry for dissapearing i was busy decaying, enjoy my cringe ass writing

Glass Joe

- Really sleepy & an edgelord, he was the kid that had hair covering the side of his face in middle school

- his parents always said that he wouldnt really be able to take up boxing due to him being a natural coward, jokes on them Joe isnt scared to get hurt (physically)

- loved reading old writing, especially gothic literature, he has a soft spot for dark writing

- wrote cringy edgy poems about every crush he had, his parents sometimes pull them out to torment him

- tried to start his own band, failed miserably

- still attached to his edgelord phase very much

- if he was a teen during the 2000-2010's he def would have a edgy wolf oc and a Deviantart account

Von Kaiser

- sickly victorian child + little german boy hybrid

- his parents always spoke with permission so he also started copying them, leading to him always interrupting people by saying "can i ask something?"

- had that one little german boy outfit, along with the huge ass lollipop and dumb hat, anytime someone pulls out his childhood pictures he prays they dont whip out those photos or he will get bullied recklessly

- NEVER EVER cursed until the wonderful age of 15 when he yelled out the word "fuck" after dropping a wrench on his foot, his dad wasnt even upset he was more concerned because holy fuck his child dropped a wrench on their foot

- got sick really often, he was out here being asked to be taken out into the garden one last time before you all posers

Disco Kid

- that one kid who had a really cool dad that let him do anything as long as he didnt blow up the house

- Really creative, writing up stories with pictures, his grammar wasnt really the best (along with his writing) so his parents had to read "the addventours off the brince" and hold in their laugh

- He was the kid who performed an entire ass dance choreography to get your parents to accept the sleepover invite

- got introduced to Disco music by his dad, got obsessed with it instantly and started dancing everywhere

King Hippo

- ate glue

- never spoke with anyone, Just beat up anyone picking on him and no one messed with him ever since

- people just gave him paper to eat, fresh with colored pencils

- liked to play make believe with his plushies

Piston Hondo

- He let you copy off his homework, i think that tells you enough

- everyone only recognized him for being a smart ass, not being creative and that really upset him

- played chess a whole lot, joined tournaments and won some medals

- academic burnout hit him like a train

- for a while, art and writing was his only escape from stress & pressure, he journaled about his feelings and drew his soul out, due to this he struggled to express his feelings without words

Bear Hugger

- chased everyone around with a spider then ate it, he was so evil for what

- never actually went to school, his parents lived out in the woods and homeschooled him since no one likes walking 2-3 hours straight just to suffer in a seat

- He always had a interest in animals, him and mrs bear go are childhood friends, mrs bear met him when she was a cub, due to this he got spared by mrs bears mom and suddenly had a 2nd mom, once his family realized that their son got adopted by a bear, they kindly let the bears in and treated it like it was normal

- loved fishing with mrs bear, he taught her how to use a rod and she taught him how to catch fish with his bare hands

Great Tiger

- so called "self sufficient" When he was just used to being alone and kinda accepted the fact he'll never have proper friends

- created the most batshit insane scenarios with his clones that would make the average hollywood movie maker shed tears, these gems include: divorce, murder, crime, assault and tea parties

- talked to himself a whole lot to the point where his parents took him to a therapist

- never really made friends, Just made himself his own friend

Don Flamenco

- oh no.

- his dad basically hated him, insulted him a whole lot, made fun of him, literally just made him insecure, when he got the opportunity to escape his dad by boxing, he took it without hesitation and got out of there

- was never really home, he was always out with friends to avoid his dad back at the house

- emotional stability? Who needs that when you can ignore your problems?

- people pleaser no matter what he says

Aran Ryan

- greasy ass bitch

- his parents didnt teach him shit, you think tigers parents didnt care about him? They'll look like helicopter parents next to them when they see what aran has going on

- had bad hygiene, only learned to shower and take care of himself in the 5th grade, thanks to that and his name, my boy got bullied and developed his behavior to defend himself from people

- Always ran from school & home, he had a hide out from away from home and a bit close to school to escape whenever he had the chance, he always dissapeared for a few weeks (sometimes months) and nobody really went looking for him, either from knowing he'll return sometime or they just dont care enough

Soda Popinski

- lonely, him and tiger are the difference between feeling lonely vs being alone, he doesnt handle loneliness well

- grew up with his grandpa & his stories, always loved listening to them and copied him whenever he wanted to tell a story

- never had a proper social life due to having to take care of his grandpa + him getting concerned about soda whenever he was out for too long

- spent most of his time crying from loneliness, away from him

Bald Bull

- precious!!! Was really shy and had a rounder face that everyone in his family pinched like crazy

- extremely sensitive & emotional (he still is hes just bottling it up shh)

- stuttered a lot, think about that one "have you ever had a dream you could you can't you would you you could be anything" kid

- was really short and just shot up one day

- scaredy cat, could be scared from anything, including: bugs, darkness, thunder, needles, sharp stuff, blood, death and alcohol (he also still gets scared easily but shh shut up)

- Always snored in his sleep, inherited it from his dad

Super Macho Man

- obsessed with sharks, dinosaurs, trucks and cars, basically got obsessed with anything he found cool

- his parents spoiled the living fuck out of him, no dime left unspent on him, no quarter spared

- Always lied about having something at the playground, sure Macho i trust the fact that you have "every dinosaurs teeth" 100% never doubted you for a second

- his parents love language was money so it got passed down to him, they were just throwing money at him and fucking off

Mr Sandman

- oldest child in his family, has 4 siblings and loves them all very much, had to help his mom & dad take care of them since they were a handful

- started boxing early so he was never in school that often unless it was 99% neccessary

- slept a lot thanks to him being tired constantly from rushing around

- knows how to do hair & make up from his younger sister

[conceptofjoy]

you know what. cut the middle man can we get a homestuck game tierlist. immensely interested in your thought process here because if i was in jakes situation ever id be flirting right back at either of those bitches. sorry.

ur telling me if your crush sent you their . ok sure ok. im ranking on how easily the humans can pull someone, not like maintain a relationship.

A) harlishes

B) june and jane

C) rose and roxy

D) daves and hal

F) dirk

jake’s rizz is a main part of his character, he can’t deal with anything more than surface level bc hes a problems haver. jade’s is genuine, she gells well with the daves, karkat was interested in her, she listens to people and’s empathetic, etc.

EVERYONE had a crush on june. her dorky and dry humor had the lesbians tripping over themselves. she wasnt really good at romancing anyone though lol. jane’s silly, down to earth, kind of a nerd, lesbians want him what can i say.

rose is. intriguing. kind of like jake honestly, she looks and acts cool asf and that ends up intimidating people (kanaya) so they have to play a mental game with her to even like talk to her. she thinks everything’s a contesstttt. she isnt able to keep her cool intimidating persona up constantly which can put people off i guess :(

roxy flirts with EVERYONE. she doesnt know when to give up sometimes holy shit. she can come off as intense and can make people feel bad, but the sheer amount of times she takes a chance guarantees her pulling someone. shes funny asf and friendly.

hal… um he doesnt dwell as much on details as dirk does. rolls with the punches better/ deals with rejection better but is equally as clingy. just slightly better than the daves.

the daves barely make the cut. their dorky but endearing swag might get someone to take pity on them. they have too many issues to be in an actual relationship with someone (unless they have just as many issues).

dirk. hes. one person says hes not interested. and hes like this close to immediately crawling under a table or getting down on his hands and knees to start begging. he’ll probably curtly excuse himself to go walk away stiffly (and crawl under a table).

[captain-is-king]

okay i didn’t want to annoy anyone with a stream of consciousness live-blogging of the episodes which CAME OUT TONIGHT!!!!! AHHHHHH!!!!!!

so here are the notes i took while watching if anyone wants to scream with me please feel free to do so

EDIT: HOLY SHIT IM A FUCKING IDIOT CHRIS IS CHRIS RODRIGUEZ!!! I WASNT EXPECTING HIM THIS SOON IN THE SERIES AT ALL. oh god and percy being friends with him now makes the betrayal so much worse oh shit oh man.

episode one:

- blackjack was percy seeing through the mist oh my god

- MYTHOMAGIC

- THIGHTY WHITIES

- oh my god they just trade sandwich toppings. that is so cute what the fuck

- grover psychanalyzing people. yes. good.

- mrs. dodds scene was underwhelming but that’s okay (edit: fight choreo is absolutely phenomenal the rest of the time)

- i am GASPING out loud at grover telling the headmaster

- obviously he’s doing it because it’s not safe for percy

- but WOOOOOOW

- eddie! what a cameo lmao

- i like that sally appears to argue with gabe more but also i’m worried she isn’t going to fucking murder gabe. it’s important to me that she kills that guy.

- also upset that percy probably won’t say “i know gabe would like to offer everyone in this lovely city free appliances” at the end

- near the septic tanks interesting detail to include 👀

- percy judging so hard like “you’re telling me found jesus”

- oh interesting the mist is responsible for grover which honestly makes more sense than hiding it? like if the mist takes care of monsters why not satyrs

- boys? i’m actually 24 I LOVE HIM

- mythomagic as training is fun

- would’ve been cooler if he swore on the styx and there was thunder but that’s okay

- omg i didn’t even realize his rain jacket was actually red until now. SUCH a good detail

- good animation of the minotaur very good

- oh my god the fight was the same like i could SEE the words on the page as i was watching it

- HE MUST BE THE ONE

- i grinned like a FOOL through the whole credits they’re so beautiful oh my god

episode two reactions under the cut!!!! i loved episode one but i liked episode two EVEN MORE so i have a lot of things to say.

episode two:

- annabeth just watching percy sleep with her arms crossed. she would.

- YOU DROOL WHEN YOU SLEEP oh my god the way she says it is like. so calculating. i always pictured it like a flippant thing in the book but no she’s like. angry. like it’s a remark on his character and she will use this detail to take him down in battle and it’s perfect and funny

- oh my god he’s turning away so grover doesn’t see him crying. i feel like this is a detail in the book somewhere but now i can’t find it happening so maybe i’m just losing it

- ok so the big house is not what i ever pictured but it is gorgeous and i love this version of it

- the diet coke

- but did you?

- he’s starting with me

- excuse me your highness

- dad? yes peter. it’s percy. exactly

- the audacity of mr. d. i’m obsessed

- “why must you ruin everything”

- omg the owls

- oh the cabins are so cool

- like one thing i never was able to picture was how camp was laid out and i just am eating so well this is so fun to look at

- I KNOW WHAT YOURE GOING THROUGH he really does though doesn’t he FUCK now i’m emotionally

- holy shit juniper????

- LMAO okay definitely not juniper she looks much older

- council of cloven elders is so much spookier than i thought

- mmmmm grover figured it out interesting

- also apparently names don’t have power. i mean that is the stance in heroes of olympus they did not care about names. so i get it

- so like. this is kronos? looking like the grim reaper in percy’s dreams?

- ok honestly the lack of annabeth so far is very upsetting

- mmmm “glory” interesting, luke

- who is this spunky kid with the hair

- YES. YES WHEELCHAIR USING DEMIGOD YES!!!

- idk why but them just using lighters takes me out of it. but it made me laugh

- yesssss hephaestus kids my beloved

- spunky kid with the hair is chris. NOW WHO THE FUCK IS CHRIS

- holy shit this is so sad. percy alone in the woods burning his candy

- OH MY GOD FOR HIS MOM oh my god i’m not going to survive this episode

- “i think i’ve made some friends here”

- oh this is too much. it’s giving “good kid” energy from the musical

- YES angry percy. i always felt like the musical emphasized how like. angry and upset percy was at his dad. obviously it’s a huge plot point in the book but it feels like more apparent in the musical and i always LOVED that about the musical so of course i LOVE that it is being emphasized in the show as well

- if percy doesn’t cut off medusas head and mail it to olympus after this and trying so hard to get his dad’s attention it will be SUCH a letdown i have to say it i’m sorry

- good bathroom scene. GOOD bathroom scene.

- are you stalking me annabeth

- yes

- oh i’m so in love with her

- like we knew she’d be phneomenal. but we’d seen so little of her in promo stuff!!! and i HAVE BEEN WAITING SO LONG TO SEE MY GIRL!!!!! AND HERE SHE FUCKING IS!!!!!!

- also saying annabeth is the head of the athena cabin and seeing tiny little annabeth is SO. funny. like we all knew it was funny that a twelve year old was in charge but SEEING it makes it so painfully obvious

- “she’s my little sister”

- they call them forbidden kids that’s a little silly but that’s fine

- also i enjoy that they’re talking about thalia-luke-annabeth earlier

- BABY ANNABETH HIDING IN AN ALLEY. oh i hope we get to actually SEE this scene one day because i do love it so

- “can you ask her to knock it off.” obsessed.

- these waterfalls are SO. cool. the one thing the descriptions of camp were always missing. i love a waterfall

- the kid playing the war drums has me laughing out loud

- laughing OUT LOUD at percy. flossing and peeing and whistling

- oh my god a lizard. i would too.

- just laying down. picking at a leaf

- i just noticed he actually has vans. skater!percy lives

- GUESS ILL LOSE DESERT PRIVILEGES good book line so glad it’s in here

- the fight choreo is SO. GOOD

- “NOT BAD HERO” ALSO GOOD BOOK LINE

- you were here the whole time and you didn’t help me? yes. what is wrong with you!!

- oh i love her SO. much. i love them both so fucking much

- one of my FAVORITE lines is “poseidon, earthshaker stormbringer. hail perseus jackson son of the sea god” and i’m so glad we got it

- i like jason mantzoukas because, like that post about gene wilder, you can really believe he’d let those kids die

- also one of my favorite scenes is annabeth being invisible in the big house the whole time percy is being offered a quest and chiron is like “someone already offered to go with you” and annabeth takes her hat off to reveal she has been there the whole time. and it’s always been so funny to me but i don’t mind that the humor of it was still maintained in the scene after capture the flag being altered a little bit. and we still got “not bad hero”

- oh shit are we not getting the oracle. i guess it makes sense. it’s a lot of time when someone can just tell percy they think it’s hades but like. actually. BETRAYED BY ONE WHO CALLS YOU A FRIEND!! FAIL TO SAVE WHAT MATTERS MOST!! ITS KIND OF IMPORTANT and the oracle is like a very important plot point later

- I AM SALLY JACKSON’S SON. YOU TELL THEM

[sebbianas]

I kinda wanna see James reactions to Regulus' other films....

Like maybe there were some particular kissing scenes..... 👀👀👀

gotchu fam

James knows its pathetic. He knows this isn’t the best way to move on from his incredibly beautiful and talented ex (it’s not like he’s actually trying to move on anyway). He knows it’s not healthy to obsessively follow his ex’s career and secretly support all his films and shows. He can’t help it, its like it’s ingrained in him to be Regulus’ number 1 fan and cheerleader. He’s not James if he’s not supporting Regulus.

So, here he is, watching Regulus’ 3rd film ever. Alone. James thought about inviting his best friends but he didn’t really want to watch this particular film with them. This film, Flowers for the Living, is Regulus’ first ever romantic film and the trailer showed scenes of him being intimate with his female co-star. James wasnt sure how he’ll react to the film so he didn’t want to watch it with anyone.

James was sitting at the back of the cinema so he could be out of everyone’s sight and would be free enough to react however he wants. When the lights finally dimmed and the movie started, he couldn’t help but feel a bit nervous. What was he going to see?

The story was easy enough to follow. Regulus’ character, Jean, was a nurse who frequently buys flowers for all the patients who’s bedside table are empty. He never lets them know its from him though, just leaves the flowers while they sleep and then act like he has never seen the flowers when they ask about it. His love interest, Lola, was one of the patients relative that Jean gave a flower to which lead to them becoming close.

Watching the characters become close and fall in love made James’ chest feel tight. Regulus’ expression while he pretends to fall in love are different, of course they are, but every time he stares at his co-star all James could think about is the way Regulus watches him when he plays songs for him. Memories of how they were before kept playing in his head.

James couldn’t feel the character’s love story because he knows how Regulus loves and its nothing like how it was in the film.

Even though the whole movie was making James queasy he didn’t want to leave, he wanted to finish the film. He wanted to be able to tell Regulus he watched all his film and supported him when they finally talk again.

That was until the scene.

It started simple. Jean and Lola were watching the sunset, Lola’s sister’s health was getting worse and Jean, who’s shift just ended, went to comfort Lola as best as he could. He brought her to the roof so they would watch the sunset and catch a moment of peace. Lola was thanking him for all he has done for her and her sister, she then ask if she could give him something in return. When Jean replied yes, she leaned in to kiss him.

James felt his world stop.

Regulus is an actor. He was a great one at that. Of course he’ll have scene where he kisses other people. He’ll have scene where it could be intense, scenes where it could lead to sex. It was part of the job, it was part of his career. And yet, James felt so betrayed watching him kiss someone else.

James doesn’t know why its betrayal he feels. It should be jealousy or possessiveness or even misplaced rage but it should never be betrayal.

And then Regulus caresses his co-star’s cheek with his point finger’s knuckle before pulling her in to kiss once more. Then James realizes why he felt betrayed.

That was how Regulus used to kiss him. Regulus and his obsession with tracing every feature in James’ face with his finger. Regulus and his thumb that caresses James’ cheeks before pulling him for an intense kiss.

Not caring about being seen or causing a scene, James stood up and left the cinema. The film probably has a good hour or so left but he’ll be damned if he stays to watch that.

In his mind, he’s the only one Regulus would ever kiss with so much love and affection ever again.

[moonspirit]

Tw: ed

Have you ever thought that armin can have an ed? Like bc he is not as big as other soldiers and all so he just eats and eats and eats even if he wasnt hungry so hed get bigger but it ends with him throwing up bc of these large amounts .

i think armins physique is pretty nice. Like its that slim body but with nice muscles. (Idc what anyone says abt that its the truth) but just him hating himself and his body and when annie finds out shell just be crashed and shell sit next to him and tell him that if he doesnt like his body, she can train him to make it better for him but he just declines bc i hc that armin knows that his body is not half bad- like its standard really but still hates it anyway

Hi anon!

Well, I can see him having some issues with food, perhaps.

I'm a believer in Armin having a severe hatred for his body; while it first probably started out as a simple thing like: "I wish I was as strong as Eren and Mikasa", joining the military made it worse. The preliminaries to become a cadet in training must've been very hard on him and I imagine there may have been some very competitive and derogatory talk amongst the trainees - children can be cruel, and big children with confidence can be extra cruel.

Given the scarcity of meat and other animal products in Paradis after the walls broke, Armin may have tried, during his time training in the military, to eat at least as much as the bigger guys (Jean? Marco? Reiner, certainly) in the hopes that he'd put on height and gain more muscle. Only, when he throws up in the empty lavatories later because his system can't take so much for his build, the self-hatred only gets worse. I don't think he'd have found any solace in confiding either to Eren or Mikasa, resorting to swallowing his feelings and putting on a brave face instead. Military life also doesn't allow for much privacy, and post-graduation, given the Scouts' irregular timetables, it seems unlikely that he'd have been able to stick to frequenting the baths early in the mornings before it fills.

Post-timeskip, however, despite growing taller and stronger, changing substantially in physique as well, Armin's issues with his body are ten-times worse. He hates his body, he's still small and weak, he should eat more, but also has very little appetite thanks to a severe slump and depression. Because he's lost so many people now, perhaps he thinks that if he'd just been built stronger or taller, something may have been different. Somebody may have lived. It's an irrational connection to make even for his logic-wired mind, but sometimes such irrational downward spirals can get the best of you when you hate yourself so much.

It could be that this struggle with food and appetite carries over into his civilian life post-rumbling. Many people seem to agree that Armin periodically just forgets to eat too, thanks to his diplomat duties and stressful lifestyle, and I'm on the same bandwagon.

With Annie, I really think what Armin would benefit the most from is accepting her wholehearted admiration and love for his body. See, I think Annie would get it too; it's not that Armin's dislike of his body will magically disappear if he just gets jacked like Reiner is--and anyway, that's an unrealistic goal to achieve, all things considered--but she can tell him she loves the way he looks, loves the way he feels, loves the way he is, and perhaps that will make it easier for him to go from "I'm not bad but I still hate myself" to "I'm fine. I'm okay. And I'm happy with that."

[bonefall]

i saw that ask about cannon ships chem and i realized that the bramble abusing squilf thing is kinda sorta pointed out. But its kinda in a heavily implied, if you squint and tilt your head you can see it kind of way. Like how in the newest arc, every time Bramble and squilf, mostly her, gets brought up, she is Miserable. She is the most depressed she's ever been and Night is constantly kinda going, huh she's in a bad mood again today too, maybe it was brambles fault. Something i noticed also is that i dont remember a single scene of her in the recent books where she wasnt tired and miserable, kinda reminds me of bluestar towards the end of her life but that phase was split between her and bramble.

I'm not holding my breath, but if ASC continues the quality of the past two books, and is actually doing set up that it is planning pay off for, I think this time we might actually get the narrative finally SAYING that Bramblestar is abusive

Because they’ve written Bramblestar making a perfect, textbook example of an abusive "set-up," a situation where Bramble makes a decision that Squirrelflight HAS to defy, so that he can shout at her for it when she inevitably does.

I keep having people show up in my replies to try to tell me, “Oh he has dementia and he doesn’t actually know what he’s doing,“ and... listen, if you really believe that a person with a well-documented abusive past is just accidentally falling backwards into setting up his wife so he can publicly humiliate her, both able to HATCH plans but also MENTALLY INCAPABLE of understanding the consequences, then maybe you are the one with dementia

He tells her not to bother WindClan over the vole. Clan politics means that Squilf needs to say something about it. He manipulates the truth out of Nightheart in an incredibly tense scene where Night is clearly uncomfortable. When Leafstar comes to talk about Tigerheartstar’s little “suggestion“ at the gathering, we get this exchange:

“Let’s see how it plays out.” Bramblestar looked at her steadily. “It’s not like Tigerstar is planning to invade RiverClan.” “Not yet,” Leafstar mewed darkly. “But I can’t help feeling that he was more than just running an idea past us, as you put it. I think he was preparing us, getting us used to his plan, so that when he does act, it will seem less shocking.” “You’re being paranoid,” Bramblestar told her. “Am I?” Leafstar looked at Squirrelflight, clearly expecting the ThunderClan deputy to back her up. But Squirrelflight looked away. “If Bramblestar thinks we should let it play out, then that’s what we’ll do.”

-Sky (page 303 in my PDF)

I cannot read this without immediately being reminded of Squirrelflight’s Hope. This is the EXACT thing that Bramble abused her about for that entire super edition-- the feeling that she ‘wasn’t backing him up’ and taking the side of Leafstar and the Sisters.

He’s upset. He’s mad that when Leafstar leaves, Squirrelflight is angry with him over what he said to her, he’s still thinking about that vole, and so. He gets Nightheart to go spy on ShadowClan... to ‘prove‘ that Tigerheartstar isn’t planning anything.

His extremely reckless grandson, the one who threw himself in front of a hawk, the one who’s desperate to please Bramble. He picks him to go spy when he was the one arguing that Tigerheartstar is totally innocent and they shouldn’t be suspicious of him, preventing anyone else who’s more capable from taking action. When Squirrelflight finds out about this, she tells Nightheart that she completely forbids it, OBVIOUSLY, because this is an awful idea!!

So we could say that the writer here completely didn’t intend any of it and is just so bad at writing that they portrayed literally the opposite (bramble bad) of what they intended (bramble good and noble), but... I’m choosing to give this arc my goodwill for now.

So here’s to hoping this arc ends with an actual Bramble callout

[weabdl]

Sophie Part One

This will go up weekly here and twice a week on Patreon, if you wanna catch part two on Monday if not earlier Check out www.Patreon.com/BabyCory1

Sophie slammed the door as she stomped into the house, her mother instantly looking up with concern from her book.

“What's wrong honey?” Her mother asked, with a look of worry and concern, already knowing that it probably had something to with her school life.

“Is college treating you that poorly?” She asked as her daughter stormed past her. 

“I don’t want to talk about it, I’ll be in my room, I want some time alone!” She said storming up the stairs and shutting her door with extreme force. Once Sophie was inside her room her face relaxed and her heart could be heard through her ears. She had done it, now she knew her mother wouldn’t bother her and she could have a little personal time!

Sophie quickly and practicly ran over to her closet, tossing dirty clothes away from her creating a small pile behind her until she eventually uncovering a white square plastic bag, secretly she loved wearing diapers and acting like a toddler, but she could never tell her mother that, it would maker her hate her. That or she would be discusted with her neither she wanted to find out. 

Slowly as if she was trying to disarm a bomb, she took one of the few diapers left from the bag and began unfolding it, while also removing her pants and undergarments, a feat in of itself. And after what seemed like hours, she finally had the pink diaper with bunnies on herself, and she was down on the ground crawling about. Babbling to herself as she crawled around her room completely shutting out the rest of the world. 

After crawling around and babbling to herself for thirty or so minutes, Sophie got up and started doing her best toddler waddle wanting to feel more like a toddler than ever before. With little success she found herself a few feet from her door as she came to a realization, she wasn't able to waddle like a toddler because her diaper wasn’t complete yet, it was still missing something every toddler had. 

Sophie began by widening her stance, and straighten her feet, then if anyone would have been close to her you would have heard a pssss sound coming from her, and if you had been looking you would have noticed the front of her diaper turning yellow as it hungerly soaked up everything she could throw at it, which was a lot. Eventually the sound came to a slow stop as everything drained out of Sophie, her hand instinctively wandered down to the front of her now yellow padding and gave it a squeeze, almost moaning in pure bliss from the feeling.

She turnned away from her door as she continued to probe her squishy padding, slowly she waddled around again, this time with a real waddle that wasnt exagerated. It was everything she wanted, and more, but this was something she had already felt, maybe not to this effect but to some similer. As she reassumed her position facing away from her door a thought came across her, and while she didn’t know how it was going to feel, something in her told her it was going to be amazing.

So with a squat and some big pushing followed with a lot of loud grunting, Sophie could feel the first bit of mushy poop start to fill her backside, there was no stopping it now and there was a lot more to go. Thats when she hear a click, and before she could even react her door flew open and there stood her mother.

***************************************

Sophie’s mother had been enjoying a nice book when her daughter busted through the door and stomped her way to her room, as a parent she wanted to give her some space, yet something told her she should go talk to her, but after some time. Eventually once things quited down she began sneaking her way up the stairs, she had been listening for the door to lock but it never did.

Once she reached her daughters room she quitely pressed her ear to the door and could have swore she heard a psss sound coming from the other side, but after a bit it dissapeared. Thats when she head the crinkle,

“Ok I gotta know whats going on in there,” She thought to herself with her hand on the doornob to her daughters room, then with hesitation she didn’t swing the door open. Maybe she was going through something and didn’t want her mother poking into her business. Maybe she wasn’t needed here, but thats when the grunting snapped her out of it, she just had to confirm her suspicions even if it made her daughter mad. 

She latched onto that door handle and swung hard flinging to door open to her daughter in front of the door, her pink bunny diapers back shoved towards her, completely yellow to any on looker, letting them know she had certainly soaked it through and through and might even have been close to leaking. That wasn’t her mother's main concern though, with a glance at her daughter’s diapered rump she could see a brown stain start to from as her daughter's head shot around, her face red with embarrassment. But she could see she no longer was able to stop what was going on in that diaper. 

Part of her knew this was weird and part of her told her that she shouldn’t be this happy. But as a grin swept across her face the rest of her screamed in delight as she knew she had her BABY BABY girl again, and this time she was going to make sure everyone knew. Then with a quick motion she brought her phone up and snapped a picture, labeling to file as “Baby’s first poppy”.

[nattyluvs]

PINK ROSES - chapter 18

"hey, look they have a photo of chris up there" yeji said to jeongin, pointing to the framed photo on the wall. yn turned to them, slapping yeji's hand.

"hey, stop holding hands if ur gonna walk next to me, i look like a loner." yn commented.

"listen, if u grow a pair and make a move on little lixie back there, u might be able to lock fingers with him" yeji scoffed, nudging her head in the direction of felix behind them.

"but-"

"no buts! just go talk to him..hes probably waiting for you"

"yeah no buts" jeongin spoke in a mocking tone

"whatever! ill be right back then..." yn mentioned, slowing down her walking speed to catch up with felix and jisung behind her.

minho, jisung, and felix were all walking together, felix seemingly not interested in whatever bickering argument they were having. yn gave felix a little wave while walking towards him, felix returning the favor.

"hey, i thought id walk with you since you dont seem interested in whatever they're talking about"

"trust me, im not. they argue everyday and then somehow make up? im not sure how they function doing anything together," he pointed out

they walked next to eachother for a bit, in comfortable silence. looking at the several concession, merch, and other items' stands. they walked like this for a bit until the silence was interrupted.

"you know, i want to try dancing one day, just as a hobby"

"why the sudden interest?" felix asked

"cause, ive seen how passionate hyunjin seems to be about it, same with you. you both seem to have this aspiration to keep doing it, im interested."

"especially hyunjin, i mean, he has danced since he was like in primary school competitively for 5 years."

"why did he stop competing?"

"well i remember he was around 15, he stopped competing because he didnt like the atmosphere of dance competitions. he just felt that going up against other people wasnt his thing." yn explained, voice shaken for a split second due to felix's hand brushing against hers for a moment.

"hmm, that makes sense. personally i think dancing isnt the kind of sport that should be competed, but judt enjoying the art of it."

"yeah, i get where ur coming from." yn answered, "hey im about to tell u something but you cannot tell hyunjin i told you, got it?"

felix nodded, "okay so basically the year felix stopped competing for dance, my soccer coach scouted him for that season and we were on the same team for awhile." yn recalled.

"why the hell would he not want people to know about that? thats kinda silly to be embarassed about"

"cause he's embarrassed about it, and he quit halfway through the season at the same time i did, and continued with dancing."

"im missing something here," felix spoke, their hands brushing once again.

"if u dont mind me asking, why did you quit? there had to be a reason right?" he questioned

"well first of all i was on a competitive team, i had worked really hard to get there then i got injured halfway through the season." she muttered

"if you dont want to talk about it we dont have to, you know. this seems like a sensitive topic for you"

"no its fine, its just i loved doing it so much, and one thing just tore it all apart, i cried alot about it. i still do sometimes"

"the really only way i can get involved now is coaching, and i dont know if i-" her voice starting to stutter, feeling the tears well up.

"hey, we dont have to talk about it anymore, i dont wanna see u crying." he pulled her into a hug, rubbing circles on her back for a moment.

"hey! you two can stop being lovey over there, we found the elevator!" they heard jisung shout.

felix rolled his eyes before letting go, handing her a cloth to wipe the tears threatening to fall down her face

"you know, you and hyunjin act like you hate eachother, but when u both are seriously talking about one another, u both sound very fond."

"shut up, i hate him, hes annoying" yn lightly punched him on the arm, while he pretends thats the hardest anyone has ever hit him.

"why do you keep touching my hand with yours, do you want to hold it or something?" yn asked

"and if i do?"

"i wont object" they successfully locked fingers with eachother while waiting for the elevator.

"your hands are really small you know" she mentioned

felix whined a bit, too embarrassed to say anything.

they walked into the elevator along with everyone else, going down a few floors until reaching the right one. they walked over to their seats while felix and yn unfortunately had to break their handholding.

"we have to put our bags in the locker room, but we'll be right back okay? dont jump onto the court while we're gone" minhos voice was heard from behind her

----

they sat there for around an hour, chatting about who-knows what. after first quarter, the group left to prepare for their performance. this left yn and yeji to sit by themselves

"sooo i saw u making moves back there huh!" she teased, nudging her arm.

"stop! it's embarrassing ill tell you about it later."

"hey whatsup!" they heard a familiar, annoying voice coming from up the stairs.

yn and yeji both turned their heads to see beomgyu, eyes and mouth wide open in suprise, not expecting to see him there.

"why are you even get here? where are your parents..." yeji asked, jokingly annoyed

"i literally have a liscense, and im on a date for your information!"

they both gasped, yn proceeding to speak "wait are you with..."

"if youre thinking what im thinking then yes" beomgyu gave them a cheesy grin

"then what the hell are you doing down here? go back to your date, dont leave him hanging you know" yeji scolded

they exchanged some more small conversation before beomgyu left and it was just the two of them.

--

after around an hour had passed it was finally halftime, they both waited in their seats impatiently for the announcer to call them out

the performance started shortly, taking turns on the big screen up above. they performed to 3 songs, stage outfits matching each of them perfectly.

as soon as it was over, yna nd yeji rushed over to the break room from their seats. they stopped to buy some flowers along the way.

once arrived in the break room, they parted ways while yn went to search for felix, finally spotting him at the back of the room, minifan blowing at his face.

"hey you did really good, you know? im glad you got over your nerve, that performance was fire"

"im glad you liked it becuse im sooo tired" he slurred, forcing her to return his hug.

they pulled away from their hug as she started to whisper in his ear, "hey dont tell hyunjin but, i was really only here to see you"

yn giggled to herself before happily walking out the room, leaving felix baffled at the confession she just dropped

"what the f-"

"felix, man!" a sudden sighting of jisung came up, "whats going on! why. are. you. still. in here. lets go? we have a reservation to catch.." jisung dragged felix and his bag out of the room

previous masterlist next

a/n: i am so wmbarssed actuslly at this, unfortunately there probably isnt gonna be any more than like 10 chapters after this one..im so sad i dont want it to be over

taglist open (send a note or click here to be added)

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[pastanest]

if you’re wondering why I’m having to repost this, or why you were perhaps previously following me but no longer are, please refer to this post. I was able to retrieve this thanks to @dreatine - thanks so much!! ♡

Spencer Reid x she/her!reader

part two can be found here

Gone - Part One

When he wakes up, the first thing he thinks of you. Or rather, the lack of you. The empty space in the bed beside him, your side of the bed neatly made, an empty glass on your beside table which you filled up each night with water and took to bed with you, and tiny bits and bobs, like a random little elephant ornament you’d bought at a yard sale. Your wardrobe still had a gap in the middle where you’d chosen your outfit. Everything, exactly as you’d left it. Spencer’s side of the room was as organised as he could manage in this situation. His mental state was in an even worse mess, but he knew that would be fixed upon your return, and coming home to a tidy house would make you feel less guilty because it gave the illusion that Spencer had coped far better than you both knew he really had. Not that you should feel guilty about this, not at all, it wasnt your fault, but Spencer knew you. He knew you better than anyone.

His eyes refuse to look at the calendar, the same calendar that was here when you were. The calendar is 2 years out of date, but it doesnt matter, Spencer doesnt need it to know how long it’s been. There are post-it notes from you stuck to the fridge with magnets, which he’ll admit they werent originally. When you’d written them, there was enough adhesive left on them to stay on the fridge, but as the days turned into weeks and then months, they began to drift to the floor; the feathers of a bird that, like you, was nowhere in sight. That was the first sign Spencer couldnt ignore that told him time was passing. He had to pick them up off the floor with shaking hands and use magnets to stick them back where they belonged, exactly where you’d left them, not even a centimetre out of place.

Some of the notes were simple, sweet love notes from you to Spencer. You wrote them whenever he was away on a case, so that when he came home he could tell you were thinking of him, each one had a date and time stamp in the top right corner. Spencer would have kept up every note you’d ever written him, but then there’d be no room for the next time he was away. So every time the fridge door became full, you cleared them and started again with the next case. However, the nature of the notes changed later on. When you approached Spencer with a strange letter you’d received, everything shifted. Only one of the letters was addressed to you, after that every letter was written to Spencer, and each one became more threatening.

Upon the third letter, Spencer took you and the letters to the team, and together they attempted to track down the culprit. Well, the team did, while you stayed inside your guarded house and played video games, crocheted, wrote stories, anything you wanted. Every time Spencer glanced at you while working on the case, you would be smiling at whatever you were doing, happy even in such a scenario. Then again, it’s quite possible you werent taking the letters as seriously as Spencer. You werent an FBI agent, you were a pure, happy soul who was excited about everything in life. In turn, you were the light of Spencer’s. Were, he shakes his head frantically, dont talk about her in past tense, she isnt gone!

After three months and no more threats, the team concluded that their presence must have scared off whoever was stalking you. The stalker was projecting onto you, referring to you only as “Juliet”, so everyone hoped he had found somebody else to fill that role. With you deemed to be safe at home, Spencer went away on his first case in three months. The team had gone away on cases without him during that time, he had stayed home to protect you, just in case. You had essentially forced him to go that time, knowing how much he missed his job of saving lives. You had said he wasting time trying to save a life that was already safe. Spencer requested two guards stay around the house while he was gone, just as a last resort, and you reluctantly agreed.

That was when the notes changed. Spencer hadnt asked you to, but you made the decision to use them as a method of communication with future Spencer. Anything remotely suspicious, anything that put you on edge, you noted it down. You werent paranoid, just careful.

Every single day, Spencer reads those notes from you.

- same man I saw yesterday walked by the house again today. 5’8”, short black hair, sunglasses, not particularly fit. havent seen him in the neighbourhood before.

- didnt see him today, maybe he saw me watching from the window. told the guards about him, they said they’d keep an eye out.

- miss you, Spence.

It wasnt much information to go by, but it was the most he could gather. You had been texting him throughout the day too, but not alerting him of anything suspicious, because you knew he’d come straight home. He should have, he could have saved you. He would have.

That morning, you’d sent him a mirror selfie of you in your pyjamas with one of your countless blankets wrapped around your shoulders.

“Still safe and sound! Cozily awaiting your arrival!” The text below the picture had said, he remembers how much he smiled when he saw it. Tears fill his eyes when he sees that picture now.

There are so many times throughout the day when the vision of you walking around the house, or anywhere he is, in fact, using a blanket as a shawl and smiling at everything. You’re never facing him, and you’re always out of reach. But that’s the most he can get.

When Spencer arrived at the office after that case, the guards that were supposed to be at yours and Spencer’s home were waiting for him, and his blood ran cold.

“What happened?” He asked them immediately, not having the patience to give them a polite greeting first.

The pair of guards looked at each other nervously, fearing Spencer’s tone and stance because he was already so angry. They explained that at lunch and supper time every day, they let you know they were going to grab food, and they were always back within 20 minutes. During the 20 minutes they’d gone at supper time, you had disappeared.

“She was gone, Sir.”

Gone. Not gone, she can never be gone! The entire team drove to Spencer’s house and began examining the scene. The first thing Spencer did was go to the fridge, somehow knowing you would have left something helpful there. He memorised every word, every wobble in any sentence you’d written to let him know you were afraid or uncertain. Your blanket laid at the open front door, and the only prints found at the house were yours. The security cameras had been manually wiped, by you, and Spencer immediately knew you’d been forced to clear it all. He couldnt process anything, his mind had slowed to a level that wasnt even human, it certainly wasnt him. It was like finding out Maeve was missing, except so much worse. You and Spencer had been together for years. You lived together, in this house, where a man had come and taken you. He left the house, needing you more than air and feeling claustrophobic from the lack of both. Derek followed him.

“Kid, we’ll find her, I swear to you.” He told him.

“I was going to propose.” Spencer’s chin wobbled, unable to face Derek as he felt the weight of the ring box in his pocket.

The week before the first threatening letter had arrived, you and Spencer had been walking home from a dinner date, having a very normal, cheerful conversation.

“What do you wanna do when we get home?” You’d asked him, holding onto his arm and looking up at him with wonder in your eyes.

Spencer smiled. “I was thinking pyjamas, video games and ice cream.”

You threw our head back. “Oh, Doctor Spencer Reid, I could MARRY you! Talk dirty to me MORE!”

The two of you burst out laughing, but Spencer’s heart was fluttering. You could marry him? Marriage had been brought up before, but only in serious conversation, when the two of you discussed whether marriage is something you both wanted in the future. It was. But for whatever reason, Spencer had never thought he was lucky enough to be the one you wanted to marry. The day before the first threatening letter, he’d bought you an engagement ring. When the threats began, he promised himself, and mentally promised you, that once you were safe, he would ask you. He had carried it in his pocket every single day since, waiting for the right moment. He had been hyping himself up on the plane home, wanting to ask you the moment he saw you. And now you were gone.

Spencer’s desk is still stacked with information and leads on your case, leads that all went to dead ends. Every trail ran cold, every single one, and after six months, the case was closed. It had to be, the BAU couldnt stick to one case for so long when it was so hopeless. Some members of the team had to work cases during that time in small groups as the time of your absence grew, they’d hoped that they could keep that up while the rest of them worked on trying to find you, but it wasnt enough. The rest of the country needed them, but Spencer needed you.

Hotch had partially reassured Spencer when the case was initially closed.

“If the unsub’s intentions were violent, he wouldnt have cared about the two guards, he would have hurt them to get to her, but he didnt. There was no blood found in your home, he didnt use violence to get her to go with him. She’s still alive, Spencer, and the second something new comes up with this case, you know we will all help you find her.”

Although Aaron made sense in what he was saying, Spencer still suffered, of course he did. Having to work other cases knowing you were still missing, and coming home to a house without you...it was hell.

And in two years, not a single new lead had come up. The weight of the engagement ring that hangs on a chain around Spencer’s neck beneath his shirt weighs him down, but despite you never wearing it, it makes him feel like you are with him, at least a little. That’s the only connection he’s had with you in exactly two years. Today is the anniversary of your disappearance. He’s forced to professionally regard it as a disappearance because there was quite literally no evidence of somebody taking you, but everyone knew that was exactly what had happened. And when Spencer walks into the office to find the entire team waiting to embrace him, he knows that they’re all aware of what day it is, too.

He quietly thanks everyone and goes to his crowded desk, the framed photograph of you sending a stabbing pain through every shard of his shattered heart. A small envelope catches his eye, and he frowns. That wasnt there yesterday, it isnt part of his research. Spencer’s face relaxes when he realises it’s probably a letter from Kate or Emily, someone on the team who isnt here to physically hug Spencer on this devastating anniversary. He opens the envelope carelessly, pulling the letter out and being surprised to find it blank. Frowning again, he turns it over in his hand, and every fibre of his being freezes.

“Juliet is still here. Have you given up?”