#because i wasn't seeing enough people calling this out
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Today I logged into facebook for the first time in nearly 4 years and went through every profile in my friends list (like ~300) and purged out all the assholes (anyone who openly voted for Trump, other conservatives, and those who I strongly believe did). I've done this before so there weren't many but there are a number that have been wishy-washy with being outward in their bigotry and it helps me keep a mental list of people that deserve only the most very basic level of respect that I can muster because they certainly do not respect me nor people I care about nor many of their fellow human beings. Most disheartening is seeing friends and family who continue to put effort into engaging with people who argue in bad faith and weaponized ignorance.
I dated a man for nearly a year who went to women's and pro-choice rallies and liberal groups with me and said many times that he "was on my side" but turned out to be lying the whole time because he knew I definitely wouldn't date him otherwise. I'd known him for years before since we ran in the same friend circle. I wasn't the only one he had fooled. He slowly lifted the mask until we were constantly arguing because of his bigoted and racist remarks. His favorite thing to do was act oppressed and show me the most obvious Russian propaganda that he would get upset at me for fact-checking and asking for real sources. He wanted to argue, so what he hated most was when I refused to argue with him. Nothing I said was going to change his mind, so I wasn't going to humor or tolerate it (we didn't last long after that point, but by that time, I was afraid of leaving without an excuse that would be "good enough" for him). He legitimately wants civil war so that he can play survival hero and feel validated in his hatred. It didn't come on quickly and a lot of the comments started as "odd" off the cuff things through the time that we dated. He was very much pretending to be a kind person and once really called out, that pretense dropped. He thought I was more like him and that a lot of my regard and kindness for others is "fake." Because that's what a lot of people like that do - they fake being kind for optics, they are not actually kind people, and therefore presume that everyone else is doing the same thing. It's given me major trust issues.
Can't say this enough: these people feel validation in their bigotry when you continue to associate with them. They need to be dropped. They need to learn that their shitty beliefs mean that they get shunned. Make them feel uncomfortable. Quit tiptoeing around and coddling their delicate little feelings because they might get upset. It's okay for them to get upset because someone was mean and told them they don't like them because they think gay and trans people shouldn't exist. I once made a post about how a raped 11 year old child should never be expected to give birth, was told that it was "god's will" and like 5 people piled on the guy so badly he told us to stop being "mean" to him and was terrified to talk to me at work ever again (I have since cut all ties and no longer work with him). I'm personally extremely tired of playing nice for the sake of possibly "converting" someone - especially because you can be polite in telling someone to fuck off with their beliefs. Their beliefs are dangerous, are going to result in people losing their lives, and a frightening number of them are completely okay with that. We need to stop being tolerant of intolerance. It is okay to cut people (including family) from your life when all their presence does is bring you stress and harm.
In a similar vain, don't let the people who chose not to vote (or "protest voted") stick their heads in the sand to escape blame. They are just as culpable as anyone else who directly voted for Trump and other conservatives. They need to grow the fuck up.
For a lot of liberals, it's really uncomfortable to be confrontational and feel like you're being intolerant of someone, but it's way past time to play hardball and call them out instead of coddling them, especially as we're going into the holiday season where many of us will be seeing family with shitty views and targeted family that may need someone to stand up for them. Let them know they're shitty and inappropriate and a disappointment and unworthy of your regard because they certainly lack it for others. Obviously still be safe, but many of us very likely aren't losing anything of value in that scenario. Not having bigoted family members in my life in any way has made me so much happier.
A helpful tip to those who may find themselves in a confrontation: do not stay engaged. Let your views be known and then disengage. Because many of them love to argue and feel like they're defending themselves (many are addicted to those feelings of hatred and overcoming "oppression"), what they don't like is being ignored and feeling like you're rinsing your hands of them. They don't deserve your stress and constant efforts. There are ways to open a dialogue when they are willing to discuss civilly with an open mind, but if they bring intolerance, just shut it down.
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You were a ray of sunshine in the Batfamily's life. You loved the children and Bruce with your entire heart, and everyone took notice. You loved each of the family members differently but equally intensely. No kid ever felt unloved by you.
You softly hum as you trace Damian's face. He always struggled to sleep. He struggled to relax enough even with sleep medication aiding him most nights. Until you start humming softly and draw patterns on his face lightly. His entire body physically relaxes as his eyes flutter shut, his breathing evening out after a minute. His face subconsciously leans into your soothing touch.
With a tender smile on your face and a gentle forehead kiss, you moved onto the next Batboy who struggles with sleep: Dick. You knock your secret knock with a smile on your face. You had a soft spot for Dick the second the kid lost his parents. How could you possibly not when his small body shook so badly in your arms? He had the same tormented look Bruce used to have before your loving family formed.
You hear a soft but excited "come in" from Dick, who seemed to have still been getting ready for bed. He loved it when you told him stories above all else. You told him thousands of your stories, but he was always excited to listen to you talk about the moment you adopted him. You'd tell him about how much you loved him as you reminisced on the first time he called you mom. How your heart had never been so full of love and adoration for your kid. He wasn't an easy kid, but you loved him deeply, and you reminded him constantly.
Dick gives you a warm smile as you set down his nighttime tea: always chamomile with lemon and sugar cubes on the side. It had to be sugar cubes, as the packets tasted weird to him.
"What story do you want tonight, sweetheart?"
He surprised you, honestly, when he asked to hear about how you met Bruce. You chuckle softly.
"It was a rainy Thursday night. We both became vigilantes the same day and met during our nightly adventures. We looked at each other for a long time before we heard police sirens and ran towards it. I must have saved his life hundreds of times that night. We have been close together ever since."
Dick cuddles into his bed and looks at you with wide eyes. He was always excited to hear this story. With a look of adoration, he murmurs,
"And you give us a hard time about our recklessness."
You roll your eyes but can't fight the fond smile off your face. You gently play with Dick's hair, continuing your tale,
"I'm not the one charging into burning buildings nightly without superpowers, darling.
Dick and Bruce adored your moral compass more than anything. You always did what was right no matter how hard it was to do. You saved thousands of lives throughout the time you were a vigilante with Bruce. He called you rash every night because of the way you handled being a superhero, but you see the endangered people and never hesitate. You are immune to damage of all types, so it was easy to run into the thick of danger to save everybody from a burning building or from the Joker's psychopathic game. Joker was angry when he found out you couldn't get hurt. You don't even feel pain because of your powers. You weren't a fun target to him, so he gave up.
"I wish I could've met younger you. I love seeing my mom being a casual badass."
You laugh softly, giving him a cheek kiss as a goodnight. Batboy number 3 was Jason. Jason took after your personality more than the rest and defends you even when it's just reporters talking bad about you. You taught him how to love and accept being loved, despite everything. You taught him to look for the best in everyone because their stories often run deeper than the surface.
You can hear his excited steps as he lets you in. He held up the newest book he wanted to share with you. You read to him every night, as he finds your voice soothes him.
He drags you to his bedside and climbs into his bed. You kissed his forehead before starting to read the book. He knows he could listen to Audiobooks, but he found it was you that soothed him. He found the narrators of Audiobooks often annoying or dramatic, but you read the exact way he wants you to and at the perfect speed.
He was soon drifting off as well, your hand holding his and squeezing morse code messages into his hand. You kissed the tip of his nose gently before moving on.
By the time you were done with all the children, Bruce was back. You grabbed the first aid kid you keep in your shared room. Bruce must've had an easier night because his injuries weren't nearly as life-threatening as usual.
He hissed through his teeth as you cleaned his wounds, but you murmured reassuring words and held his hand with your free hand.
"Just a few more, baby. You're doing so good, my hero."
He squeezed your hand when you were done. His exhausted smile was still so full of love for you.
"We're so lucky to have you in our lives."
He kissed your cheek gently. He loved you deeply, even when it was hard for him to express it. Love truthfully scared him ever since his parents' deaths, but you were the ray of sunshine in his darkest of nights.
"I'm lucky to have my little army of heroes. I love you and the kids."
He gave a tired hum of acknowledgement.
"We all love you too."
Alfred, appearing as silently as ever at the doorway of the bedroom, said,
"Master Wayne, if you don't marry her, I will."
You laugh at Bruce's shocked expression. He whipped around to face Alfred, who was staring at him with a look that was so serious you couldn't help but smirk at. While you'd love to marry Bruce, you knew it wasn't that simple for him. He struggles with the idea of having a loving wife waiting for him. He doesn't feel like he deserves it at the moment, and you respect that. You will continue to be the mother of his children and the warm presence in his life. You voice your thoughts,
"Alfred, I don't need to marry Bruce to be part of the family."
Alfred raised an eyebrow at Bruce, but Bruce was in another place.
"That much is clear, but I still want you officially part of the family. You're the glue holding everyone together."
You smile at the duo. Family is so much deeper than blood, and you continue to prove it to the Bat family every day. You ruffle Bruce's hair gently.
"I'd never say no to my boys."
Bruce took Alfred's advice on your anniversary. He proposed in front of the entire family, which inevitably ended in a dog pile of hugs from all your boys and a sweet kiss from Bruce.
Bruce, your private and loving fiancée, confirmed the engagement to the world the next day, holding up your hand and giving it a gentle kiss. He held your engagement hand everywhere he went, the rest of the Bat family fighting to hold your other hand, eventually scheduling who holds your other hand in an endless cycle.
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CW FLASHING IN THE VIDEO (3rd from the bottom)
This is it. 3 months in the works, the comic (and video) are finally done.
A little over a year ago, I uploaded the first work in Revenant AU, Ghost's origin comic. I never thought I'd write a whole series for this, but I'm so glad I did. I got a whole new hobby out of it, haha.
I already began working on part 2, but this for me marks the start of it. I'm really excited to get back into this world!
Under the cut there are some comments on the comic I thought some people might be interested in (don't wanna make this post longer than it already is lol). I will upload the frames from the video separately, with comments on it there.
Bottom line is, thank you for letting me just go wild with this :)
Okay, I'm mostly gonna talk about the part where Fate shows Makarov the 141+Farah. Makarov doesn't see the Fate of people as literal images, he often has to interpret odd symbolism in the flashes he gets from the Weave of Fate.
I decided to go for a style I saw in a collection of calling cards in MW3, mainly from this one:
You can really see it in the faces and pitch-black cel shading.
I'll be going in order of appearance, starting with Farah.
Obviously, each of the "flashes" shows the Reaping of each person, Farah being crushed under rubble. Behind her is a helo of green gas, which symbolizes the Russian experimental gas. The motifs around her are more interesting imo - they're taken from the Urzik flag (and yeah apparently it's "Urzik" and not "Urzikstani"... according to the wiki at least). Wings, plants (feels to me like a pomegranate and some sort of crop, but I couldn't find what it is specifically), and a moon, upside down.
I'm skipping ahead a bit, but I've had the idea to make a drawing of Gaz in the Hanged Man pose since I started the AU basically. I tried sketching it once, and it went bad so I gave up lol. But I decided to come back to that here, and add some sort of tarot connection to all of them. I know practically nothing about tarot, googled the meanings of each, they fit well enough, I called it a day lol.
So Farah is the Moon, upside down.
Price is next, showing him taking control of the brain of someone. I didn't use the flag of the UK for the 141 (it'd be kinda boring...), instead I took the Taskforce 141 logo, and broke it down to different elements.
I took the laurels for Price, both framing his illustration and sitting above his head like a crown. I decided he will be the Emperor.
Next up is Gaz, the Hanged Man of course. Gaz gets both the wings and the stars (I changed mine to 4-pointed because... I like them better). Pretty clear why, both symbols relate to the sky. The illustrations kinda follow a rough day cycle, if that makes sense. Farah being night, with the moon. Price with his golden and purple color palette, twilight. Gaz being sunrise, and Ghost and Soap, day. This is why Gaz has a sun behind him.
Ghost was fun because he's the only inhuman one out of the group. I'll let you think what that implies, that even in Fate's Weave, Ghost is an outlier... Ghost gets the skull, and the card "Death". That one was easy, but what I did add is blood flowing down the skulls, like tear tracks...
Soap, the problem child, gave me the most issues as always. For once, it wasn't his fucking face, it was the flames behind him, and overall contrast and readability issues. Soap's illustration is probably packed with the most "hidden" details, though they're obvious if you've read the fic and Konchar's side story. The headless man behind Soap is Konchar himself, holding 4 chains with dog tags on them. The 4 soldiers from Soap's squad, who he killed before Soap was Reaped. Soap's pose is from the moment he came to his senses, after getting shot in the head and destroying a large part of Verdansk. He has 4 swords, pointing at him and downwards, so his card is 4 of Swords, upside down.
Between Soap and Ghost is a circle and a triangle. I'll explain that in the post concerning the video, since that's where I got that from.
If you read all of this, thank you so much! There will be another post for you to read in a moment lol
#cw flashing#call of duty modern warfare 2#cod mw2#cod ghost#cod soap#cod gaz#cod price#cod farah#revenant au#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#kyle gaz garrick#john price#farah karim#vladimir makarov#call of duty modern warfare#call of duty fanart#cod fanart#its been so long since i used the rev au tag...<3#as you can imagine... drawing a creature with literally 10 arms flailing around was quite painful#i think you can see me give up on the anatomy in real time there lol#but i do like how this turned out. the video couldve been better edited but#after effects crashed on me 4 times in the few hours i worked on it already so. fuck that lol.#also makarov isnt having a good time huh#deserved tbh
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There's no way of knowing for sure but I think it's an interesting question to discuss...
I assume that you'd need to recognize your fear on some level for the Boggart to represent it... We see a lot of pretty 'childish' (not meaning this in a condescending way) fears displayed in PoA when they have that Boggart lesson... Not so many dead bodies or even abstract fears (like being lonely), as you would expect from adults. And it all makes sense because they are children but you simply can not tell me that Hermione's greatest fear really was McGonagall telling her she'd failed all her classes. Of course fear of failure is a valid fear (all fears are valid?) and believe me, I can relate, but with everything they had gone through already? Also... Remus asking them to take a moment to consider their greatest fears implies to me it's something you're aware of on some level.
So... What is/was Remus aware of?
The moon obviously is a very obvious choice - from a young age on its there, it's visible, it's easy to blame for him reliving excruciating pain and fear (and lose of self-control) every month.
And when we see him facing his Boggart, it's indeed the moon. Not being shunned by other wizards, not side-effects of lycanthrooy but the moon. Of course it's a symbol for his lycanthropy but as it's the full moon it's obviously linked to the transformation into a werewolf. That's what he is most afraid of. But which part? The pain? The lose of self-control? Reliving trauma? All of it?
It's interesting to note that the moon is Remus' Boggart even in a time in which he had access to Wolfsbane (PoA) which means in a time in which he did not experience lose of control (of course it's a possibility that by then it's been ingrained into his mind so there was no simple 'rebooting' it). So maybe it's not the self-control thing? And if it's not and the pain has always been there, does that mean it's always been the moon?
I don't know if it's as easy as that... Because in PoA Remus misses classes for days because of the moon, Wolfsbane and all. We don't know for sure how it has been when he went to school but I personally don't think he was out for that long. Because I can not imagine that no one except for Snape picked up on his absence if he missed days and days every (other) month. But also because of Sirius' (insensitive) 'wish it was full moon' comment. Yes, Sirius can be cruel but I can not imagine him making such a comment if Remus spent a considerable amount in the hospital wing every month. No, we're led to believe the full moons were fun, adventures. Remus tells us so himself and calls them the best times of his life? Now he is obviously lying a bit (because the transformations were still painful even though he now had company and didn't hurt himself anymore and I do believe he was playing it down out of gratitude and guilt towards his friends.. along the lines of 'they already became animagi for me, don't complain about feeling sick now') but isn't there a bit of truth in there still?
So the full moons obviously were still painful but he has company, roamed the grounds with his friends and didn't need as long to bounce back? Is that enough to assume the moon wasn't his Boggart at least through a few 'happy' years?
I honestly don't know. I can see him having a different Boggart in that short period of time between them becoming animagi and the war picking up... I can see it being something about abandonment (which is also the reason he did never say something about them bullying Snape?). And I think it's safe to assume he was aware of that fear (the Snape thing, him looking grateful in that photo on Sirius' walls, his behaviour as an adult even when he continues to defend them..) But I don't know if it's about losing people in the sense of them dying...
His Boggart is still the moon in OotP when he yet again had someone to lose (if not Harry then Sirius - old friends and all..). But maybe by OotP he has realised that he could survive on his own, that, while it wasn't pleasant, he didn't need his friends.
I can also see his Boggart changing after Teddy was born (or, before Teddy was born that he had infected Teddy with lycanthrooy - actually I think that Boggart is very likely), but that is also just speculation.
Long story short: I don't know but I find it interesting to explore and I think there's enough ground to argue in different directions. But I do think as a teenager/young adult it's less about losing his loved ones than his own deep-rooted abandonment fear (being worthless...)
Was Remus' boggart always the moon, or did it only become that when he no longer had to fear losing everyone he loved?
#nor sure I'm making much sense#just rambling#also I didnt read the hp wiki#no idea what it says#remus lupin
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Hello 😌 for the late night call prompt:
"i know you didn't just hang up on me without saying 'i love you'."
This could be so sweet (or not). Would love to see your take on it!
Hello! I'm feeling the fluff today, so I hope you like it. Thanks for the ask :) <3
John's mouth had served him both well and ill in his life.
He was funny and he was charming. He was able to spin a story and keep a table entertained. He could cheer someone up easy, diffuse arguments if he chose to. And because he could read people quick sharp, he could either make fast friends with a few choice words, or could provoke or end a fight depending on which of his more mercurial moods he was looking to feed that night.
But his favourite thing, he'd come to find over the years, was talking in a constant, rhythmic roll and lulling Gale, a notoriously poor sleeper, to a good night's sleep.
John wasn't even going to let state lines keep him from that privilege.
Work had sent him away for a couple of nights to deal with an issue and another officer. It's what he got with his reputation for being able to influence and mediate with the best of them. And of course, just two days before he was due to go, Gale fell sick. Not sick enough to warrant John calling it off; but just sick enough to worry and stress him all the way out because he wouldn't be here to take care of his Gale.
Gale who had no sympathy for his plight whatsoever.
"It's two days. I can take care of myself; I'm a big boy."
John leered without intent and moseyed into Gale's personal space. "Oh, I know."
Gale spluttered a dry cough into John's chest and struggled to get his breath back and John whined.
"Come on, Gale. Just say the word and I'll cancel. You won't have to lift a finger until you're better."
Gale pushed him off and tugged the cover he had draped around him like a cape in tighter. "No, thank you," he grimaced. "You'll hover, you'll get sick, then I'll be taking care of the two of us. Get to stepping, John. Quicker you get there, quicker you get back."
So they'd said goodbye, Gale tolerating John's too-many long looks back with barely a roll of his eyes (and John knew that was just because even his eyes were hurting). But he could kick him out the house and force him to go to work and make fun of him as much as he liked, but Gale couldn't stop John from calling him for their regular night time chatterbox sessions.
"I thought you were working," Gale drawled raspy into the phone.
"At nine pm? Not enough overtime pay in the world, sweets. How you feeling?"
Gale's answers were brief and perfunctory, but John could hear the ever-present affection even through the brevity. And John was always happy to pick up the slack. He murmured to Gale about the trip, the shit show at the office, and the gossip he entirely made up about his colleagues in another state just to keep himself entertained. He spoke about the town and the hotel, and what he had to eat. He told him every tiny detail he could think of, until he heard Gale's breaths even out and the soft snore of the congested drift across the line.
Chuckling low so as not to wake Gale, he finally hung up, proud of himself for being able to fulfil his duties even if he wasn't there in person.
But it only lasted a few seconds before his phone screen lit up, and Doll flashed across the screen. John swiped and lifted the phone to his ear to hear Gale's thick, sleepy reprimand.
"I know you didn't just hang up on me without saying I love you."
John grinned wide and dimpled and all teeth and gum at Gale's grumpy complaint. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. How rude."
"Mmph." Offended. Like a puffed up cat. John could practically see the displeased frown in the centre of Gale's brow.
"I love you. Now go to sleep."
"Mmph." Contented. Pleased. Maybe with that tiny little smile Gale had that pulled his apple cheeks up.
John stayed on the phone long past Gale's return to sleep. Just in case.
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For the character hotness rating, for the fun of it: the current Terrafell crew (by whatever names you'd like to call them).
Atticus:
Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY.
Tall, lithe, and graceful. He's feminine enough to be considered "pretty," and he makes up for it with a sharp smirk and purring tone. Is he faking his deep voice? Yes. Is he using beauty magic to keep his hair shiny? Definitely yes. Does he have a tendency to "accidentally touch" people when he's instructing them? Absolutely. He's competent, capable, and funny when given the chance. He's not quite my type, but he's someone's and she is going to be a lucky woman.
Sock Police:
Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY
He's big, he's broad, his biceps are the size of my head. He's got a little bit of a baby face that is going to turn into an amazing jawline and cheekbones in a couple of years, and his hair is ridiculously thick. He's constantly brooding, but that just might be his eyebrows and deep set eyes, which seem black but in the sunlight turn to spiced honey and his scars might as well be tattoos for him.
Furniture Man:
Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY
He's tall, has cheekbones to cut glass, and the beard. Yes, he's a little thin and pale and his eyes might freak someone out, but he's also very mature and incredibly aware of the limits of his situation while also maintaining hope and actively trying to solve stuff, which is just attractive in and of itself.
The Doc:
Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY
He's got a vibe. With the gray hair and the gray eyes and the glasses it's definitely a Look but he's also incredibly smart and empathetic and he's definitely a person to feel safe around. My introvert tuchus is mentally sitting in the same room as him without having to say a word.
Sir Dwarf:
Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY
Okay, he's not my type because he's definitely got a dad bod and he's, well, a dwarf, but he's got the physical ability to bench press me with one hand while folding steel with his other and I am not immune to that. Plus, he's the height of chivalric respect and there's very little I could ask beyond that.
Nik:
Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY
He's also not my type, but heaven knows that's not enough. Dark skin, dark eyes, the jaw, the confidence, the laid back attitude that tempers his bulging muscles, the smile. Weak for it.
A.T.:
Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY
He has the body of a 35 year old and the soul of Distinguished Gentleman. He's wise, thoughtful, and a legit snack. His eyes can see into your soul and his aggressively generous nature hides a surprisingly cunning side that would make me bite my lip if I saw it in person (if it wasn't directed at me)
Minor characters:
E. From D.:
Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY
He's definitely in the Distinguished Gentleman phase of life. He's rocking the gray hair, eye wrinkles, and his eyes are the sparkliest blue. I'm not there yet, but give me fifteen years and I will line up.
Emperor to Be:
Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY
The curls. The lips. The nose. This man is a Greek statue in flesh. He's ambitious and aggressive and possessive, but he will take care of what is his and he is mine.
Haggard Mailman:
Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD MERCY
Okay, in my defense, he just. Didn't get the time that put into his design that other characters did, and instead of being "video game gorgeous" he's just a background character. Someone probably thinks he's cute or handsome, but he's pretty generic.
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I am already seeing virtue signaling posts from people saying "I don't care what you believe or how you voted..."
That's great. I care. I care a lot. The outcome of this election effects me, but so much more than me. I care. It matters. And if it really doesn't matter to you? Good for you. If you are privileged enough, safe enough, and entitled enough to truly not care about how the election will impact other people... I can't even imagine what that must be like. Nice, I guess?
I spent most of last night and this morning crying.
I'm done with tears now, and have moved on to rage.
And you know what? I promise not to let it burn out. Because smiles and positivity may work for many of us, and I'm not going to lose mine either, I promise not to lose my queer joy--they can rip it from my cold dead hands, not to get too damn dramatic here--but I'm also not in the mood to start forgiving and smiling and welcoming Nazis into the bar.
So. I will hold onto anger. I've been tolerant and accepting long enough in life... and have learned something important about what causes the worst harm.
I have been gay bashed before. Violently. Blood. Broken bones. Lost teeth. And you know what the worst part of the recovery of all of that was, the part that did the most psychological and emotional damage? It wasn't the actual bashing itself. It wasn't even the memory of exactly what it felt like to have something swung full force into my face with extremely violent intent. It was the denial from my "friends" and family afterwards. The people who wanted to deny that it was a hate crime. The people who wanted me to shrug it off and not be upset about it. The people who loved to say oh well it wasn't that bad. You know what helped? Letting myself feel fury. Letting myself name the attack as hate. "It wasn't that bad," though, they said, asif it was their judgment to make--endless hours of dental procedures, pain, wounds that never fully healed, the trauma, the lost work, the new experience of vomiting blood with broken jaws and knocked out teeth. Because it wasn't that bad. And there was so much self-reproach, because I could have avoided it. I wasn't the intended target. He was swinging for a lesbian with me. When the attacker burst out of hiding he was swinging for the side of her head, her temple. I jumped in between them. Didn't think. It was an impulse. Protect the people you care about. So I took it to the face. And I grabbed him. I threw him, and fell doing it. I remember being on my knees in the mud. Seeing my teeth in the mud. Seeing my blood just. Everywhere. And knowing I needed to push back to my feet immediately because it might not be over.
We were lucky. It was over. He hadn't expected anyone to fight back. He ran.
But the people who claimed to love me didn't want to deal with the idea that it was a hate crime. They wanted it to be random and meaningless. That made their world a little safer, I guess. And their denial made my world colder. And my recovery lonelier. Harder. They put me down for "bringing it on myself." As if it would have been more virtuous to let this woman take that attack to her temple, as if I would have been more valid for standing by and watching it happen.
There are so many more stories I can tell you, but the lesson is almost invariably the same: the ugliest hurt is often the one caused by the people who just turn away when you identify what happened to you. The hurts that cut the deepest and last the longest often come from the people we thought we could trust, because they want you to just get over it, don't talk about it, admit it could have been worse, don't call it That.
The betrayal from people who are supposed to have your back? That deepens wounds, deepens trauma.
I won't be that person. I won't tell you to smile and turn the other cheek when someone shows you they hate you. Do whatever you need to do to survive--physically, emotionally, psychologically. Just don't give up, and don't let the cowards force you into feeling shame for not giving up and letting the world break you.
Never be ashamed to refuse to break.
Never let someone shame you for choosing strength. For drawing your line in the sand.
I wanted the "exciting" times of my life to be behind me. But they're not--so be it. I'm not going to tone myself down to be safer. I don't care about my own safety anymore. Any self-preservation drive broke a long time ago when it comes to homophobia. I promise to always be ready to fight. To be a queer menace to "polite" society. I promise to be out and loud and gay, to be a shield however I can for those who can't be out, who can't fight back, who can't even speak up because it wouldn't be safe for them to do so. They are valid, too. And I love them. And I will have their fucking backs. I promise to, in my real off-the-internet life, be someone who will always jump in and speak up if I see queer people being harassed or shamed--especially if they're young. I am older. I will fight for my baby gays. I will love them.
And I will never, never put anyone down for refusing to welcome Nazis into the bar. We don't look the other way and quietly tolerate them. Not here.
I may not be around much for the next few days. I need to handle my own shit. My own fury. My own grief. Because right now, there is so much grief.
But I won't be going anywhere.
I will fight to stay.
Whatever it takes.
I'm not giving up.
If I end up on my knees in the mud again, staring at my own blood and teeth, metaphorically or in fucking reality, so be it. I will get back up. And I will keep getting back up. I won't let go of the anger. The spite. And I definitely won't let go of my love for every queer person, the ones I know and the ones I don't, because that love is what will give me strength to get through this. Whatever comes next.
I may not have much sense of self-preservation. But goddamn, I will fight for you.
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Sonic Frontiers is the perfect example of this!!
I'd also like to add that people closest to him have been the only ones to challenge his morality and make him question and think on them more, but back to frontiers.
We hit the first island, and you get to know the residence, the koco. Cool dudes, but Sonic isn't interested in spending time with them. He wants to find Amy, but guess what? If he brings them to the elder koco, he can exchange them for power, this means now he's going out of his way to collect them. It's a good deed, of course, but with an ulterior purpose, keep that in mind.
Later, when he finally finds Amy, he's still collecting the koco, but he hasn't really bothered to talk to them, yet she has. We see how he starts getting a little impatient, tapping his foot, crossing his arms, since he can't understand their conversation, and to be honest, his focus is elsewhere, but he let's her have it and when she asks him to help he obliges. Later, though, there's a limit to his patience, and he snaps, and they have this conversation:
"Are you saying you'd leave someone in need?"
This conversation gives us 2 things;
sonic doesn't really care what happens to the koco in that particular moment. He cares about AMY
He views the koco as child like
Why do these points matter? Because he doesn't care what happens to what he perceives as children, when Amy is in danger.
Granted, when she asks if he would deny someone in need, he says "No" and we can tell with the way he shakes his head that's not his style, but he really is worried about setting her free and finding tails and Knuckles over the koco.
Eventually, he does listen to her, though.
Funnily enough, this isn't the first time Amy butts heads with him on morality, and they argue before he gives in. Remember the robot she stopped him from killing?? Yeah.
Let's not mention when in sonic X he manipulates her into going crazy on the boat cuz he wants to get off of it as soon as possible, or when in generations he doesn't feel like hugging so he puts his whole hand on her face 💀
But that's enough on Amy, what about tails?
He argues they're technically helping delusional kocos by feeding into their delusions. Sonic comforts him about it and changes his mind, but what they're doing remains the same, feeding into the delusions the koco have about a timeline they no longer exist in. Sonics ok with that.
That said, sonic will either see your point and still try to convince you about his (like with tails) or be stubborn and eventually give in (like with Amy) but only if you are close enough to question him. Otherwise? He's doing his thing no matter what.
Surge called him out once, and though it rattled him, he didn't change. He is exasperated now. In idw, we see him think, "till next time, eggman and the time after that." He's clearly tired with the thought, but he didn't change his ways because his way to him is what matters.
I bet if it was someone like Amy or Tails it would have scared him more, he would have thought about it a little more, maybe even argued back, but it wasn't them who said it, it was Surge.
Sonic the hedgehog IS morally ambiguous, and he's ok with that, so long as he's his friends hero, that's all that matters.
Sonic is the most morally ambiguous character in the Sonic franchise
#that was very rambly byt i felt like talking about it#sonic the headgehog#sonic the hedgehog#sonic idw#sonic frontiers#amy rose the hedgehog#amy rose#tails prower
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i have a lot to say about this one so pack a snack and let's make sex moneyyy
i think this is one of the most openly culture and media (and social media) critical songs he has. i think it's a super daring song that probably makes the likes of certain helsingin sanomat music critics a little bit uncomfortable, because he is spitting facts - and because he has a relationship with sex for show that people for some reason are still quite weird about.
to start a little further back: we all know sex sells. we all know the music industry uses sex to sell their products. but for some reason, in the year of our lord 2024, a musical artist verbally recognising that they are using their sexuality and sexual themes to build their brand is somehow scandalous. it's like.. it's okay to use sex to sell your art, if it's like "accidental" MTV sexuality or like agreeing to looking objectifiable. the media will call you hot and sexy and wow. but if you own your sexuality, make it obvious that yes this is sexual, i'm being very deliberately sexual and i am trying to be sexual..? oh no that won't do! scandal! we've seen it with so many artists, especially female artists. like WAP is a great example! how scandalous that suddenly these women had agency in their own sexuality! but no-one said a word when their sexuality served the usual male gaze agenda. it's like people are so much more comfortable being peeping toms who sexualise and objectify artists when they're not looking, but as soon as the artist does it as part of their whole thing? well now it's inappropriate actually.
he talked about this in a helsingin sanomat interview, saying how he does actually think things revolve too much around sex in the music industry, even though he uses sex and sexual themes himself to sell things as well, and that he sees the irony in saying that. but the difference, in my opinion, is that the way he, or someone like erika vikman for example, is so open and upfront about the sexual themes, that it becomes carnevalistic, it becomes camp. it's not insidiously using sexual and heteronormative objectifying imagery to get people horny. what käärijä does is playful and fun sexuality, and for whatever reason that is so unusual it needs to be talked about separately as something a bit wild and scandalous, and he needs to be asked to explain his actions.
and that's what this song is. he's very clearly saying none of this is accidental. the visuals of his brand, the social media content, the onlyfans thing, none of it is coincidental, accidental or anything other than his perfectly deliberate way of selling sex. and he has talked about these themes before, he has talked about like the rammstein live stuff that inspired him (some of it is pretty hardcore stuff) so to his fans it's nothing surprising that sexual themes are present in the brand and interest him. but he has also talked about how, even if this song is a bit tongue in cheek, he's also serious. and he is right. and for some reason calling people out about the fact that sex makes them buy things, even when it's true, is still.. scandalous somehow.
and he's basically calling people easy lmao. like, i needed to figure out a lil boost to my career and well, i know what will make you throw money at me. and i won't be shy about it either.
i'm getting sidetracked. the song.
and then that is enough to warrant lyrics such as "koko perheen käärijästä koko perheen krapula" meaning "käärijä for the whole family turning into a hangover for the whole family".
but it was all already there! let's not for a second pretend CCC was some sort of family show and a family song. it's not. but people were okay with that, because they could happily confuse the camp and carnevalistic sexuality of käärijä with the campness and carnevalistic nature of eurovision, and because it wasn't more than the suggestive sexual nature of everything else around them. and it was all just fun, when kids came up with their own lyrics to the song because they couldn't understand the references to drinking. so then people took their kids to see him at shows and became scandalised by the adult nature of it all. it's like.. people were fine letting their kids see the everyday media sexuality that we see in every eurovision, fine letting their kids get used to that, and then just sort of didn't think käärijä would be anything different. but he's only different in that in his show and brand, sex and sexuality aren't denied while still blatantly obviously there.
but again, a lot of this is to do with media, and what media normalises and what it doesn't. what it deems newsworthy and what it doesn't.
if in ready to go he's telling haters that i know you want to see me try and fail, maybe even be too embarrassed to try, but baby i'm ready to go, then in sex = money he's saying i know you want to see me naked and i know you want sex from all of this, so here you go, i'll sell you some sex. and then he stands there holding eye contact like what are you going to do with it. what a cunty king.
and there are so many fun and funny little details in this song.
right in the first verse we have "kieli taittuu sköödi föödi." good old sköödi föödi. i tried to find the earliest example of sköödi föödi, but i'm starting to think it might predate the internet, or at least social media. not to bring up köpi kallio again, but they use sköödi föödi a lot in viki ja köpi show, and köpi just happened to tweet about it in 2020, saying he believes sköödi föödi has been around for at least 20 years (someone tried to credit viki and köpi for it). so, what does sköödi föödi mean, you ask. it does not mean anything at all. sköödi föödi is just a sound, a noise you make, when you need it, usually in place of something in a foreign language but not exclusively. in this instance, sköödi föödi is him demonstrating his excellent english skills. sköödi föödi (pronounced almost like a sterotypical tv american would say skirdy-firdy) means nothing and it means everything, whatever you need it to mean.
it is also noteworthy to point out that "kieli taittuu" can be a reference to two different things here. the finnish word kieli means both tongue and language. so he could also be saying that he has a very bendy and flexible tongue, like literally. which, of course, all of europe has already seen. taittua literally means to fold or bend, but it's a common phrase to say, that if you can do something, you bend it (or more like it bends as a result). so literally the line translates to "language/tongue bends sköödi föödi".
the first verse ends in "sekö jos mikä on varma nakki" meaning "that, if anything, is a sure thing". nakki literally means a sausage, a hot dog sausage, weiner sausage, you name it: a small sausage. so translating literally: "that if anything is a sure sausage". it's a common phrase in spoken finnish, nothing unusual about that, but i love that he used it, because it makes the next line hilarious on a first listen, when the chant comes in. so when they start chanting NAK- NAK- i really thought they were gonna shout NAKKI. but no, it is nakuna, naked.
okay still with me? good. let's look at the "tein onlyfans bägin, koko suomen daddy" section next.
i remember when the song came out, people did explain who danny is, but in case anyone missed it, danny is a singer from finland, and he was a MASSIVE star back in the day, especially in the 70's. so to say he is bigger than danny is indeed quite the flex, because danny was like.. the finnish equivalent of elvis, basically. but danny is not just a flex, he turns danny into a clever thematical scheme here (more on thematical schemes in the bananas post, if you're interested). he says "kadulla on kuumaa, ne pyytää mua hätiin" and this is a reference to one of danny's most popular and famous songs, kesäkatu. smart, smart, smart! and then of course "kadulla on puumaa, mut mulla on jo täti" meaning there are cougars on the street, but i already have an aunt. which, that to me reads like both a cunty quip and a himbo line all at once. like shutting down some man wanting to be your daddy by telling him "but i already have a father". i nearly choked laughing the first time i heard the line.
also can i just say, calling himself the daddy of finland? like, thinking about the whole context i talked about at first, how people are comfortable with sexual stuff and sexualising, but not comfortable recognising it or being real about it or celebrating it? yeah knowing all that, he just called himself EVERYONE'S daddy in a song called sex = money, and he's not even wrong 😭
in conclusion: i love this song. and i love the attitude in it. it's like he is looking everyone, from every uncomfortable insecure hetero man, every scandalised parent to every tabloid journalist, straight in the eye and saying "yes, i'm selling sex. why? well i couldn't think of anything else, but then again, why should i? isn't this what you want? this is what you want. i know what you want. i'm your daddy."
like if he truly wanted to, he really could have this country on their knees for him, don't tell me last independence day didn't prove it. as much as he gets crap as well, at the end of the day, he has people under a spell by simply being, well, bigger than danny. and he-man.
now. the placement of the song on the album, right after autiomaa.
i personally don't think that the album builds one cohesive narrative from beginning to end. but i think this can be read two ways: a sad way and an empowering way. the sad way to read it is that he means it when he says he couldn't come up with anything else and his creativity is fried, but sex sells so he does that, and it's a bit mindless. but given the context of what he has had to say about this song, i'm more inclined to read this the empowering way: he has worked on himself and found a way to see things more clearly, and he has found it in himself to even be confrontational about things. the whiplash of the song order i think is more to highlight the fact that autiomaa is a rare glimpse into something different, and now here we go again. to me, sex = money makes autiomaa even more powerful, but autiomaa doesn't change the interpretation of sex = money all that much for me.
you really can't be upset about the song without proving his point. and you can't love the song without proving his point. facts have been spat and points have been proven. absolute king behaviour.
and if you read through this whole thing, i owe you money. cash money, not sex money. well, we'll talk about it.
++
bonus: i absolutely love that he knows how to say "make some noise" on this track, but continues to say "give me some voice" or some sort of a hybrid word between voice and noise, something like.. woise, at his international shows. the king of in through one ear, out through the other. he, she, noise, voice, he doesn't know the differences and does not care.
bonus bonus for the sad bojere bitches:
second verse: "täl alal ei sua kukaa huomaa" meaning "nobody will notice you in this field (of work)". maybe my brain is rotted but this moment reminds me so much of the famous liverpool bojere lunch date video where bojan tries to parrot jere, who is saying "tääl ollaa nyt, tota" and bojan goes "talalaiteta" and then they both proceed to giggle about it like it's the funniest thing anyone has ever said. "täl alal" goes out to you, bojan titanic.
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Need to get something off my chest
People in the fandom blaming Nana for causing Shigaraki to be abused and all the suffering the Shimura family went through as well as calling her decision to abandon Kotaro stupid is if someone blamed all the abuse and horrible actions of Enji that the Todoroki family had to suffer through on Enji's deceased father.
Specifically people appear to zone in on Nana's call to not have All Might or Gran Torino check in with her family when it makes sense. She knows AFO has eyes and ears everywhere and will use that to kill those closest to her and those around her as we know since Nana's husband is dead by the time Kotaro is given up for adoption and All Might leaves Japan for the US in order to avoid AFO for that same reason. There is also no way for Nana to know that her successor would wind up as the strongest wielder of One For All and would be the first person to take down All For One.
I'm not sure if you were in the mha critical side of tumblr, but this is a very common opinion here. Nana deserved better, and none of the nana hate honestly made sense.
People shouldn't blame nana for doing what she could to protect her child. She explicitly said that she had done it to protect him, and she didn't willingly want to give up her child. The act wasn't done out of malice but was done out of love. Her husband was dead, and all for one was on her tail. She had to train all Might, and there was no safe choice to keep kotaro. It was a hundred times safer to make a distance between her and kotaro so he could live without the burden of his mother's duties on top of him caring or threatening to cause him constant harm.
Nana tried her best as a mother, and we didn't talk enough about it. She, at the beginning, was probably the breadwinner of the family, her job making it so that she had limited time with her son, yet from the flashbacks we see that kotaro loved his mother dearly. He loved her that child him simply cried and cried when she was about to leave, he loved her to the point that he kept her picture acknowledging that she was his mother yet despising that she left him all alone. His hatred of nana stems mainly from feelings of sadness and betrayal, which only exist because he loved his mother and felt safe when she was near.
I suppose we don't talk about the fact that after nana's husband died and she became a widow she had to juggle all the responsibilities of being a weirder of OFA, a mother who had to be constantly active in her child's life and a hero who had to save others while also ensuring that she earned enough money to keep her son comfortable.
I headcanon that at the time nana was never a good cook and that it was her husband that usually cooked for the family but when he died she had to take on the cooking duties which was a struggle but we see her actively trying even including her son in the process.
Giving up kotaro was the most logical circumstance, and I stand by that. I think to a certain extent, kotaro realises that too, and it's exactly why he doesn't blame his mother but blames her job he blames the hero, not his mother. To me, it evidently seems like kotaro separates nana into two different versions : the hero and his mother.
If we follow that belief, it's exactly why the only photo that kotaro has with his mother is so painful. Every time he sees that photo he in a way, is forced to acknowledge that both versions of nana are his mother. The photo shows his mother, but it shows her in her hero attire she is the 7th weirder of ofa in that picture not his mother but the mannerisms, the way she smiles and looks at him is that of a mother's look.
A haunting picture for kotaro. A picture of a mother's love.
Comparisons between enji and nana fall on deaf ears especially when you look at the circumstances and situations that both characters are faced with.
Enji DOESN'T love his children, his actions were out of malice, greed and desire to be great. He sacrificed family for greatness.
Nana LOVED her child. Her actions had a desire to protect, love, and care for her only family, her only offspring. A beautiful light in the world that she doesn't want destroyed by AFO. She had no choosing as I bet if she truly had the choice. She would do anything to love, protect, and be with her child. In a dreadful situation, nana chose the only way to guarantee kotaros safety.
#mha#bnha#mha critical#bnha critical#thanks for the ask#horikoshi critical#thanks for the ask!#bhna critical#thanks anon#thanks anon!#nana#nana deserves better#nana get behind me i will protect you#they can never make me hate you nana#nana shimura#anti enji#anti endeavour#anti enji todoroki
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Hi sorry but people on twitter are saying you’re a nazi and I was just wondering if that was true??
Not only is this quite outrageous take on someone without like 0 actual proof. I can admit in the "proof"(the zionism thing which people mean as Nazism) people used against me was me at most being insensitive/ignorant which i already sincerely apologized for because i wasn't edjucated on the matter whatsoever. It was not right of me and I never repeated that after i found out about the truth of things.
But also this is ridiculous. I'm not american, I'm from a country that has been wartorn by nazis and communists. All my life I was taught about atrocities these two sides did to central europe and other countries. If you had a swastika tattooed on you here you would get literally arrested or killed on the street. But that isn't even an argument, that's just me stating how stupid and hypocritical it would be of anyone to support such things from the area i was raised in. I'm highly anti nazi, anti facist or anti anything that is even similar to that. I stand with civilians and innocent people that are being collateral damage to war and governments. Therefore I'm not a trump supporter, i was always left leaning i was always for rights. Hell I'm a bisexual woman, how could i ever support someone like Trump in my right mind?
I do not understand where this claim is absolutely coming from and i dont understand how people disregard the severity of saying this online with confidence. This is such a serious accusation that can ruin reputations unrightfully and just shows how people have no interest searching for more proof or anything before saying serious things because all they care about is drama and that the finger is not pointed at them in that moment. We as society got too comfortable about canceling and just saying anything, growing into complete parasocial relationship within each other. You are either no person to them, no human being or you are a glorified idea. Everyone is a person behind that screen and if they ever got over they pride and looked themselves in the core they would understand they also do mistakes and not everything is black and white.
I'm hurt by these accusations. This isn't anywhere close to calling someone names or weird for having odd preferences and stuff in fandoms. This is claiming that I support actual genocide, suffering of real people which is fucking awful. It makes me sad, deeply hurt. I'm not saying im better than anyone else, i dont need to be, I want this genocide to end same as anyone else would. I reflected, I took criticizm to heart and I'm now trying to truly do something with my following, i retweet donation links and donate to the charities with spare money i have.
The truth is, no matter what I say, it will never be enough for the people that just want to have moral highground, they act like they never made a mistake, like they were never ignorant in their life. I wonder how they would like it if someone took something terrible out of context and endlessly kept posting it on social media just to feel better without you having a proper chance to redeem yourself, always being seen as a "nazi" in some people's eyes because someone lied about you. It's sad and I'm sorry you keep seeing this lie about me. I think about it every day. And with this message I wanted to let you know what I truly feel and think. If you believe it is on you, but I'm finally putting my thoughts out there after months of thinking.
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America is the hegemon of the West. What America does will embolden the rest. You can argue that 'maybe you all should ignore America and get its shit together', but 'maybe' isn't going to help us right now, in this moment. Right now, think less about 'should've, could've, would've', and think about now. This is the burden of being the hegemon: for all your privileges, some sacrifices and wisdom have to be performed.
I'd like to bring up a clumsy analogy I wrote about a while back:
You are on an island. It's on fire. There's flooded, mouldy island right next to the burning island. You have chosen to die in the fire or drown in the ocean, because 'but the other island is mouldy and flooded and grosss'. And the fire will spread. This fire will be carried over to the other island, and it'll burn, too, because if you didn't actively stoke it, you failed to try and put it out. This is not addressed to those who voted blue. This is for those who didn't vote at all, voted for the 3rd party to retain their own moral high ground over the HERE and the NOW, at the expense of everybody else. And it's for those who voted for moving over to the moulding and flooded island, but complained every step of the way to the point where your complaining convinced some people to stay behind and die in the fire, or even spread it.
And now the fire will spread anyway. The flooded island will go up in flames too, and the fucking ocean surrounding you will boil in no time.
THERE IS NO MORAL PURITY ACHIEVABLE IN POLITICS, LET ALONE IN POLITICS AS BINARY AS THE AMERICAN PARTY SYSTEM. The world isn't made by making the most moral choice. The world keeps existing because people keep choosing the lesser of two evils, the one that is even ever so slightly open to become a bit less evil. This election doesn't just determine the fate of America and its people. It determines the fate of its less wealthy, populous allies who haven't had the blessing of existing on a separate continent, oceans away from those who would like to see your home ground to dust. You want to enjoy the privileges of being America in the world geopolitics? Yes? Then you have to understand that your decision (or lack thereof) will affect all of your allies.
My only hope is that people who saw the US as an ally have a nasty wake-up call and choose to emerge as a major world power of their own. They were right. We should never have relied on the US. Though knowing the US, it did its damndest to make sure that its power was unrivaled, and the rest of us remain their vassals.
And I worry for my friendly folk over there. Not even remotely condescendingly. I'm dead worried for them, and what they're about to have to endure, and I'm so damned sorry. You tried, and it wasn't enough. But damn, you tried, and that's the only ray of light in this. I remember being terrified all the way over in fucking Estonia when Trump won in 2016. It is so much worse now. No one can claim ignorance anymore.
happy election day to all the people that decided that virtue signaling is more important to them then the rights of their friends, their families, queer people, disabled people, BIPOC, women, climate change as well as their own rights.
thank you so much for voting for trump by not voting or voting third party! i hope you got everything you wanted out of this.
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Episode 19
SERIOUS SPOILERS in this one, jfc do NOT read ahead if you have not already watched ep 19!! 😭😭
Wait where did all the other demons go? We only saw Li Lun let one out and leave with her.
"You're the reason I have nothing" says Li Lun??
Ooooh Li Lun killed all the people keeping the demons in cages... and the "fight" we saw a glimpse of earlier was Zhu Yan stopping Li Lun from killing one more person.
So Zhu Yan was trying to stop Li Lun from indiscriminate killing, which would surely get him in trouble, and Li Lun saw it as Zhu Yan putting humans over demons and protecting people who had hurt demons...
Oh SHIT!! Oh wait! That flare of power when he stopped him was NOT intentional! It was the ever-burning fire branch that was absorbed into Zhu Yan.... and Li Lun is a fucking tree demon! He accidentally kinda set him on fire?
He didn't mean to hurt you Li Lun, just to stop you from killing!
Shit he killed the clinic patients, not even the bad guys who imprisoned the demons. As I said, indiscriminate killing. But as far as Li Lun is concerned, all humans are the same, all are guilty...
Okay point of order, how come Li Lun calls him Zhao Yuanzhou in these flashbacks? Cos I thought he only got given that name by the Baize Goddess, and I thought he only started spending time with her later on, when he was mired in sadness? The Zhu Yan in these scenes is still young and (relatively) carefree?
Uh, your Zhuo Yichen fanboy is showing Zhu Yan...
Ayyy gang to the rescue!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! What the fuck did you do to my baby boy?!!!
Divine power?! Is Bai Jiu part-god? Is he like Ying Lei and half-demon, half-god?
Ugh, Zhu Yan telling the others to get Bai Jiu to safety and confronting Li Lun alone... except he is NOT alone because Zhou Yichen stayed with him!
Oh dang. Well, she wasn't wrong that Li Lun would want to torture her in front of Zhu Yan.
Ooooh so he WAS trying to curse her and control her into hating Zhu Yan.
Another thing I love about this drama is the realism... which sounds daft to say about a very much fantasy drama but what I mean is bits like this... when the script/story calls for a character to get wet/be submerged in water... they actually DO it. There's no CGI/fake underwater scenes, and no actors with hair and clothing that has basically just been spritzed so it is barely damp... they actually get them properly submerged and wet.
Yes boi, use that ice water power!!
Damn boy, you so fucken cool...
Oooh he cut him with a blade coated in his own blood... and therefore malicious energy...
"I now carry blood with malicious energy"... meaning.. he didn't before? Or just... his malicious qi levels weren't previously high enough that it infected his blood too? I mean... Li Lun obviously knew about him absorbing malicious qi, hence the whole blood moon plot...
Oh fucking GO Wen Xiao!!
Took that fucker by complete surprise and swiped his weapon right out of his hands!!
Smash it! See how he fucking likes it!
Okay that was dumb, you decided to try and use it instead.
Oooh we saw that earlier when he escaped after the seal was broken - the skin on his arm is turning woodlike...
Yup... as I had surmised... Zhu Yan accidentally damaged him with the ever-burning fire back then... and because he is a tree demon... the fire of that burn has never gone out. He's been burning in agony ever since.
Aaaaaand that's another nice helping of guilt for Zhu Yan, who no matter how he tries seems to keep hurting people due to things that are out of his control...
Oh shiiiiit so being sealed by the baize token actually controlled the fire from the ever-burning wood. Otherwise he would have burned to ashes.
So if she hadn't sealed him, he'd be dead. And now that the seal is broken... he is burning again...
Wait up is he actually burning up right now? Like he's gonna die now? With 13 eps left?
Jfc give Hou Minghao ALL the fucking acting awards!!
So... the big bad is dead and gone? And we're only just over half way through.
So... am guessing the plot will now revolve around how to avert the two impending disasters of:
the wilderness collapsing if the baize token cannot be repaired; and
Zhu Yan destroying the human world when he inevitably loses control of the malicious qi.
Oh and here comes Chongwu fucking camp to join the party...
Oh so the bowl had the Yao water in it? But now it's polluted with blood...
I wouldn't necessarily believe what Li Lun said dude...
Yeah keep telling yourself that babes....
Oh wait, I hadn't realised it was Chongwu Camp AND Demon Hunting Bureau together?!
And let me guess, the purpose behind this unprecedented cordial entente is... to kill Zhu Yan?
Oh, arrest him is it? So your guy can then kill him and take his core.
Pleeeeeease tell me Demon Hunting Bureau isn't gonna sign off on this shit?
Since when is Sijing the Prime Minister's representative?
Also, Wen Xiao, sweetie, you should NOT be relying on Sijing to back you up... she's a fucking mole for Chongwu Camp!!
Aaaand there it is.
Uuuuuh okay... so mum is not dead? And yeah... there sure is a lot to explain to your kid fella... like how the fuck he's got divine power?!!
Can't see how Chongwu Camp's prison could hold Zhu Yan any better than Demon Hunting Bureau's if he really wanted to leave? (Am not seeing any demon-power suppressing charms). So I guess for the moment he doesn't want to leave...
Oh my, has our boy Yichen finally managed to acknowledge that things aren't quite so simple as black and white?
He sure fucking is!
I'm... starting to wonder if the dude behind the mask is gonna turn out to be... said prime minister?
Ooooh I stand corrected, they did put a bunch of suppressing tokens in his cell....
(Ngl my whumper's heart is still kinda hoping he will get injured/tortured whilst his powers are suppressed.... come on Chongwu Camp... do this one thing for me... )
Oh shiiiiiiit the Prime Minister is the "scholar" who attacked the dragon mountain god. He's had it out for demons since the start!!
Uhhhh that's a new look for Wen Xiao?!! I'm gonna guess this is a demon pretending to be her? Perhaps the same one that was doing the same in Li Lun's dream world?
Oh MAN, he were go again with flashback city!! And Zhu Yan has fucking known from the start that Sijing was a Chongwu spy and has used it against them!!
Oohhhh those fuckers lied to her that her brother was still alive and tried to use that as leverage - not knowing that she already knew for certain he was definitely dead.
So she's been pretending to be their mole all this time... to help Zhu Yan find out what they are up to.
Ahhhhh fucking epic!!
So Chongwu camp has been using demons for research... just like the clinic Li Lun and Zhu Yan busted all those years ago?
Okay wait I am CONFUSED. It was only 8 years ago that he and Li Lun busted the clinic? And that's what Li Lun was sealed for (so he's only been sealed for 8 years?) and that's when Zhu Yan wigged out under the blood moon?
So... Zhu Yan had already been hanging out with baize goddess long before that? And been given her brother's name?
But was also visiting the mortal world with Li Lun, seemingly carefree? So this hairstyle...
and this....
were a matter of maybe days apart? Was the grey hairstyle just something he used for visiting the mortal world with Li Lun? But we also saw him with that hairstyle being reprimanded by Ying Zhao for visiting the mortal world when he hadn't fully mastered malicious qi, which I had assumed was when he was much younger? Which is why I had assumed the grey plaited hairstyle indicated younger Zhu Yan? But I guess not?
Oh damn... mystery mask dude is... Xiao Bai's master? Ngl I did NOT fucking see that coming!
And he's been experimenting on demons all this time?
Has... has he experimented on Xiao Bai? Is that why he has divine power and was worried when asked if he was a demon? Have this fucker used demon/divine blood on him?
Oh FUCK and that's why he wants Zhu Yan's core! For his experiments!! A great demon's core!
Ohhh fuck that doesn't sound good...
I think this might be a trap...
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
WHAT
THE
FUCK?!!
NO! Noooooooooo!!! Not my baby Xiao Jiu!!
I AM NOT OKAY!!!
#fangs of fortune#episode 19#liveblogging... kinda#noooooo#i am crying#how could you do this to me show?!!!
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OK, MAYBE I UNDERSTOOD MOON'S THOUGHT PROCESS AND WHY THEY DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING TO SUN UNTIL NOW.
So, listen pls.
Moon, from the start of all this, was made by the Creator to kill people, to be Sun's torment; so when they separated, Moon didn't know how to act towards Sun, because he has always been nice to them and Moon didn't know how to return the kindness, so they started find some things to do and spammed projects on projects to be finally useful to Sun in some ways.
Moon wanted to be the person who Sun looked up to when there was a problem, so they could fix it and make their twin happy.
The problem was that in the process, he neglected Sun, the person he wanted to make happy, by calling him stupid and ignorant and sometimes hitting him too, because he didn't do what they wanted.
When Moon died, he lost so much time away from Sun, in his own mindscape, watching that sunset over and over again , regretting the terrible things they did to Sun.
When they got revived and went to finally meet their twin again, Moon remained shocked about how much Sun changed; he wasn't the always happy, childish, naive brother they once know; Sun grew up and wasn't willing to have the same relationship with Moon and the lunar animatronic totally agreed with him, they wanted a better relationship too, a TRUE ONE.
The shock didn't go away that easly tho, because Moon didn't know how to act around Sun, because they were afraid that they might repeat the same past terrible actions they once used to do; so their relationship remained awkward for a while, but at the end it became more stable.
When all this sh*t happened, something in the relationship broke and Moon didn't know how to fix it, so they thought if they had captured the person who hurt their brother, Sun would have felt happy again.
But that wasn't so working, because what Sun truly needed was his twin to be by his side and comfort him, but as Moon said, Moon isn't good with emotions and etc.
So Moon convinced themselves that they were the problem and that was the reason why Sun wasn't happy; so they closed themselves in the lab, so that Sun would feel better.
Until now, Solar forced Moon to finally talk to Sun about all this and when Lunar told them Sun went out, but didn't return, Moon feared they made a terrible mistake and that they lost their precious twin again.
When Solar told them about the boat ticket, Moon immediately knew where Sun went, because he knows his brother better than anyone else and they know what he's thinking and possibly why Sun went on his and Nexus' ex-island.
When Moon saw Sun in that state, he understood what they had to do and finally found the words to talk to his twin and comfort him.
In conclusion, yeah Moon, you might be bad with emotions, but honestly, who is that good with emotions? Not even Earth! But is the fact that you understand the situation and know what to say the moment you see the person you love suffering that matters more for the person in question, so Sun in this case.
He loves you more than you can ever imagine and yes, Sun might not need you, but he WANTS you, he wants you to be there, to be his brother and comfort him, so be a good brother, be what you truly are, a TRUE caring twin/brother to everyone, Moon!❤
OUFFF- Alrighttttttt, enough blathering for today-!
#fnaf#fnaf daycare attendant#fnaf security breach#sams#sun and moon show#fnaf sb#angst#brotherly love/comfort/angst#twins brothers#twins love#celestial twins
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Silly Fiddles
POV: Fiddleford
Tonight was the night when I quit the project, couldn't take it anymore even being outside of Fords house was a nightmare. Luckily I have a solution to all my problems, forgetting Stanford Pines.
The memory gun was always in my pocket, so I got the gun out my pocket and started to write Stanford pines in the machine. Put the gun up to my head then suddenly I get a touch on my shoulder, instinctly I point the gun on the guy or thing who touched my shoulder and fired.
Finally I get to see the guy who was behind me, it was Stanford himself which surprised me, why was he out here? Wasn't he trying to "changed the world" with the stupid machine we made. Wait oh no, I realised that I wiped Stanford entire mind, I only fired the gun because people aren't supposed to know about the memory gun, unless I tell them. This is so dumb now I have to help him again, I hate this man so much but I don't hate him enough to leave him confused and lost.
He looks at me confused just standing here, then he asked "who am I, who are you, where am I?" This gave me a brilliant idea, I can just get Stanford my to do my bidding and destroy the portal. I giggled a bit "well look who's silly, your Stanford Pines and you must of hit your head, when you were trying to take down the portal?"
Stanford looked more confused "What portal? Are you a friend of mine?" I couldn't contain my laugher "of course I'm your friend, it’s Fiddleford, you like to call me Fidds" mmmm maybe I shouldn't of told him my nickname. "Now let's get you back in my house and check for any head injuries" oh gosh I'm so hilarious, pretending his house is my house "Fidds your such a good friend, I'm so lucky to have a friend like you" okay that does make feel guilty, I shouldn't of lied than but it's too late now, why is he being so gullible, was he always gullible and I didn't notice?
We had back to the house, I got Stanford in the bathroom, got a dim towel and pretend to clean off his fake head wound. He was blushing for some reason and I was too, what the hay is going on, why am I feel warm in the head. "Um once I bandage your injury and turn off the portal, we will head to bed eeeerrrrr Okay" Ford looks up at me all bright eyes, gosh I never notice how beautiful Ford's eyes were. "Oh that's an excellent idea, your so amazing and smart"
Wait why is Stanford being so nice to me, I know he's memory isn't here, but when ever I did patch him up he would usually just look at the floor than leave when done, usually when he does say nice things about me he doesn't tell me, he would just write in down. "Um thanks, well now I got your taken care of"
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glad to see a new writer for wb manhwa and i already love ur oliver fic 🫶🏻 since ur req open can i request for hyuk with his highschool crush (&& preferably fem!reader) thankyeww!!
Between The Lines
Highschool!hyuk x highschool!fem!reader
Genre ; sfw , fluff
Author note ; Thanks for the compliment :)) I think i will probably do a part 2 fort this fic , since the end is kinda an open one. English is not my first language so im sorry if there are any mistakes, my request are still open !!
Hyuk wasn't exactly what you'd call a model student. He spent most of his time in the back of the classroom, head down, doodling in the margins of his notebook or staring out the window. School was just a thing to endure until the day was over.
But lately, his gaze had been lingering on someone else : Y/n
She sat a few seats ahead of him, always focused, her pencil moving gracefully across her notebook. She wasn't the type to cause a scene or demand attention, but Hyuk noticed her in everything she did. The way she tucked her hair behind her ear when she was deep in thought, the way she always make a little smile when she answers a question correctly, little things that most people probably don’t notice.
Hyuk though? He noticed everything.
One day after school, Hyuk stayed behind, pretending to look for something in his desk, but in reality, he was waiting for Y/n. She was always one of the last to leave, making sure her notes were perfect before packing up.Sure enough, she was still there, flipping through her textbook, her brow slightly furrowed.
"Hey, Y/n," Hyuk said casually, trying not to sound as nervous as he felt.
She looked up, quit surprised. "Oh, Hyuk. What's up?"
He scratched the back of his neck. "You're pretty good at math, right? I'm kinda stuck on this problem." It wasn't a total lie-math wasn't exactly his strong suit. But more than anything, he just wanted an excuse to talk to her.
Y/n tilted her head, a small smile forming. "Math? Didn't think you'd ask for help with that."Hyuk shrugged, leaning against her desk. "Figured you'd be the best person to ask."
She laughed softly and moved her chair over to make room. "Alright, show me what you ve got."
They spent the next half hour going over equations and formulas. Y/n was patient with him, explaining things in a way that actually made sense to Hyuk. Everytime he got something right, she'd give him an encouraging nod or a quick "See? You're getting it."
Hyuk found himself more focused than he'd ever been in class. Not because of the math, but because of her. As they worked, he couldn't help but notice little things: the faint scent of her shampoo, the way her lips pursed slightly when she was thinking.
At one point, their hands accidentally brushed as she reached for his notebook. Y/n didn't seem to notice, but Hyuk's heart skipped a beat.
"See? It's not so hard once you break it down," Y/n said, tapping the page with her pencil.
Hyuk nodded, trying to act like he wasn't completely distracted. "Yeah, thanks. I guess I just needed a good teacher." Y/n smiled, a little embarrassed, "Happy to help you out."
As they packed up to leave, Y/n glanced at him. "You know, you're not as bad at this as you think. You just need to put in the effort."
Hyuk smirked. "Guess I'll have to ask for your help more often, then."
She laughed, slinging her bag over her shoulder. "Well, if you're serious, I'll be at the library after school tomorrow. Feel free to stop by."
Hyuk felt a surge of excitement. "Yeah? Alright, maybe I will."
They walked out of the classroom together, the hallway quiet and bathed in the warm glow of the setting sun. For once, Hyuk didn't mind the idea of spending more time in school. If it meant getting to know Y/n a little better, he was all in.
And maybe, just maybe, he'd learn more than just math along the way.
I really think im gonna do a second part , let me know what you guys think !
✵
#windbreaker webtoon#windbreaker x reader#hyuk kwon#hyuk kwon x reader#windbreaker hyuk#hyuk#kwon hyuk#kwon hyeok#hyeok#swrkn
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