#because he does hold onto some of his humanity he isn't lost

[pix-writes]

tlou meta: the watch

SLIGHT SPOILERS AHEAD (look away now if you don’t want the game/tv show spoiled)

Here’s the thing that has insterested me since I finished the tlou game like 10 odd yrs ago & with the show making sure the watch is a recurring ‘theme’ on screen:

Throughout the game (and through the show so far), we are reminded frequently of how Joel has done some terrible shit to survive, has fucked over innocent people in the name of survival.

But the thing about his watch is, is that it is a symbol of his humanity. Not just of what grief he’s been put through, or of survivor’s guilt. Because his watch is what he looks to when he is in situations with Ellie, where he ultimately decides to keep going, to keep protecting her. It reminds him of Sarah, of course, but thematically it holds so much more weight than just a reminder of what he lost. It’s a reminder of what he used to be (a father). 

I could go on about why this is (though honestly i’m too tired/wired to think it out coherently) but the main, interesting part of this train of thought is that if the watch is a symbol for Joel’s ties to being human, of making the ‘right’ decisions (to protect Ellie), is that Joel has NEVER taken the watch off!

[tinydefector]

Enjoy some of the stuff I like writing of the transformers/ the history, mentality and personality I like writing into the characters. Let me know if you would like some other characters and I'll make another.

Masterlist

Characters breakdowns

Megatron

Megatron, despite what continuation I enjoy as a sappy poet who loves writing. Pre-war, he was actually a very sweet and caring mech who had high hopes from changing cybertron. He wrote as a way to show people the horrors that were happening in the mines. Trying to make people feel on a personal level 'humanize' the lower class cybertronains and make people empathise and see through their eyes. During the war, Megatron makes so many mistakes because at the time, he is still young, and he doesn't know anything else outside fighting, mining, and writing because he never had the luxury of living. And when you're living in an oppressive regime, there is going to be rebellion, when the only way you can have your voice heard the only way to change things is to fight. That's what Megatron does. At first, it's noble, but over time, it wears down his morals. There is only so much death you can see before it destroys your mind and changes you. He gets into a mind set of 'it's either you or me' and self preservation will kick in and despite all his sacrifices he has done for the greater good of cybertron he still wants to live, and the only way he can do that is to make himself into a monster for his own protection, he finds it safer to become a warlord, and a usurper but as time goes on his midn finally caves and he doesn't care for the consequences anymore, becuase the war has been going on for so long. He knows the only way this war ends is with his death, and he is a selfish bot who never got to live freely. He's going to hold onto that, even if he puts others into the position he was once in, he wants to be able to live and he's going to do everything he can to have that freedom of never being under someone's rule again, yet it leads him into becoming what he sort to destroy.

Depending on what continuation I'm working with depends on how he is after the war. Mtmte IDW continuations I love that he ends up with the lost light. Not for the reason that he got his freedom. He got what he had been fighting so much for, but he isn't the one in charge anymore. He has to relearn how to live and relearn how to be civil, which is hard when everyone there is a victim of your war. Rodimus original hates the fact he's there, Megatron is the reason Rodimus became who he is, and he hates it. He hates it and blames Megatron for nyon, for him having to become a prime. But over time, he realises just how lost Megatron is on the ship. He doesn't know how to be just another mech in a group. And I love the idea of Rodimus letting him be co captain as a way to give him some semblance of control over his life again. And Megatron is an amazing captain, he loves working, he loves reports, loves checking machinery and making sure it is still functioning and it leads him to also becoming Ratchet's apprentice with medical becuase he never wants to be helpless to save someone he cares for ever again.

Earthspark continuation Megatron lives with alot of guilt and regret over so much, some days he still wonders if it was the right decision to join Ghost but each time he sees Dot with her child both human and Terran it makes him feel it is all worth it. He never got that as a young sparkling, and he would lay down his life to make sure those children never have to be in his position ever. Megatron was a warlord with a spark too big, and in the end, it got broken too much to the point that he felt safer becoming something else to protect himself. And I can't blame him, I've made decisions I never would have before because of death, it changes you breaks you and turns you into something you would hate if you saw yourself in a mirror.

I actually happen to like the idea of Megatron being younger that Optimus by half a century or so

Optimus

Optimus is one that depends on continuation a lot. Becuase it's either I like writing him as this feral goblin from the Rust sea who Codexa took one look ad and went. 'This little rustlet is my son' and teaches him everything she knows, and Orion is all too happy to learn. He loves the archives, history, and preserving it. And he is very much Codexa, a little rust goblin who goes to protest and everything because he sees it unfair for so many to suffer. She is very proud of him despite fearing deeply for him because he is a young spark, and she doesn't want to lose her son to propaganda.

Or we have Orion as a law enforcer who was trained under Alpha Trion, he's a stern bot but he does care for people, taking Drift to Ratchet, caring very much about shockwave and trying to protect him as much as he can from the council. He follows the rules but will bend them when it comes to protecting people and he's a bit of a hot head, snarly and tempered.

Becoming a prime either makes him bolder or more mellow tempered, but he still caring and willing to fight for his friends and loved ones, watching cybertron fade breaks his spark so much becuase he never wanted to see this happen, he never wanted to watch Megatron become corrupted by the thing he sort to change. But war has that effect on all of them. The war wages on and each century it just makes Optimus more tired. He is actually a very depressed mech, but he puts up the wise and friendly facade. But he misses so much of his culture, and it hurts even more if he is the archivist continuation becuase he has all of these documents and he re reads them and some nights he will cry himself to sleep becuase he wishes he could have changed to path of the war. And in truth, if it came down to it, he would go back and give his life to prevent cybertron from falling. He was made into a prime he wasn't chosen to be one, and he's constantly at war with the matrix because of that. And when the matrix bonds with Rodimus, Optimus is selfish and relieved. If he had his choice, he would never touch that cursed thing ever again. To him, being a Prime isn't a gift. It's a curse.

Ratchet

Ratchet, in his younger days, was a big partier, but as he gets older and does more surgery, it starts to chip away at him. Watching how if a mech of a higher class was brought in, they got fast charged in front of other patients. He had to watch mech he had known and grown a bond with shut down because he was forced to work on another mech because they were of a higher class than others. So when he opens his clinic, I. The dead end asap way to help mechs of lower status he never would have thought it was what would lead him to hsi further Conjunx, at first Deadlock wasn't anything special to him, just some poor bot who had hit the lowest of lows. So when this mech keeps coming back over the centuries to check on Ratchet and make sure he's alright,it amuses the older medic over this speedster.

But when the war breaks out its Deadlock who's the first at his door, telling him he needs to leave becuase it's not safe, a large sum of money transferred to him, and a pleading look from Deadlock. That's how Ratchet ends up at Optimus' side throughout the war, he's dedicated to keeping as many bots functioning as possible, and he sticks by medic law, he will help anyone, Decepticon, autobot and unlined bots without a bat of an optic. And little does he know that He is on a list of do not harm. Deadlock pulls a lot of strings as Decepticon. Ratchet is one of the most well-known medics due to being the Autobots HMO, but also because he is on a protective list, he is a to be captured only, killing him is an automatic execution. Ratchet himself is quite the rule breaker. He meets up with Deadlock multiple times, fixing him and snarking him, calling him a stupid kid for getting himself so beat up. But over time, Ratchet becomes rather smitten with Deadlock, and all it takes is Ratchet asking him to leave the Decepticons and Deadlock does without argument.

Drift

Drift, he's one who I want to write more because I love him alot, he's a mech, which started out with nothing and is now one of the most wealthy bots to still be alive. From a junkie to one of the Decepticons' most feared assassins. Meeting Ratchet changed his life around, I like the idea when Ratchet was saving him. Deadlock literally saw Primus that day. And he doesn't know how to repay Ratchet. He tries to better himself get off the circuit boosters, but that falls in with the Decepticons and makes a name for himself as an assassin after he and Hotrod go to a rally, Hotrod took one look at Megatron and walked away, but Megatron caught Deadlocks attention. He makes a name for himself working with Mixmaster and a lot of money off it, but he refuses to go back to using, so his wealth just slowly accumulates. And when cybertron falls and the war continues, it's something he doesn't pay attention to. But Ratchet is, he makes it very clear to every con that Ratchet is off limits, and many think Deadlock has a personal vendetta against the medic. And a few bots learn what happens when they lay a hand on the medic. So Ratchet becomes the infamous medic not only because of his skill in the field but because Deadlock literally has him on a can't touch list that even Megatron respects.

When Deadlock becomes Drift he gets a full cosmetic surgery done by Ratchet, and the medic vouches for him making it very clear to everyone that Drift is off limits, that's when Drift and Hotrod finally see each other again, it's a reunion and a half. Once the war is over and cybertron is slowly being rebuild is when Drift realises the fortune he has amassed over millions of years. He's the one who funds the lost light expedition as a thank you to Rodimus for everything he has done for him. Both he and Ratchet join the lost light as a way to get away from cybertron and the names they have made. And it's only on the lost light that Ratchet actually finds out Drift is older than him by a good few million years. And it leads to quite some funny situations because no one knew Drifts age. Rodimus is shocked, and so are many other bots. But I also have this very funny little thing in my head of an interaction with Drift and Rung. Of Drift doing a therapy session with Rung, sitting there meditating when he suddenly just goes. "I know you're Primus, I don't know why, but thank you for leading me to Ratchet," and Rung is sweating coolant like. 'How does this fragger know who the fuck I am!?!"

Rung

Many of you know I love writing Rung as Primus in hiding. And I love the idea of him making himself this tiny mech who collects spaceships from over millennia, and they are his most prized possessions, he learnt many skills but became a therapist becuase he wanted to help people, it was always in his natural to help those he could. He gave up his original form, creating cybertron. He was there for the first sparklings created. He was there throughout everything. And when the war started, he evacuated a lot of young sparks, wanting to protect them, but it broke him. Watching that shuttle get shot out of the sky. Rung has been there for everything, he cringes away when people pray to him, he despises the cults made in his name, the depictions of him as this selfless warrior, he wasn't a warrior, he was a scared bot with no choice but to stop Unicron, he's a selfish bot who wanted to enjoy the life that his original form has gifted.

He enjoys being a therapist, but after the war he realises all the trauma so many bots have and he tries to ease it to help them throught it the best he can, but when he's doing a session with Drift and the mech turns to him looks him dead in the eyes and says he knows Rung is primus it spooks him. No one could know that Rung was older than this bot, so how could he know that he had never done anything that could have made Drift suspect him. And it is left as a mystery as Drift never brings it up again, never tells anyone else, but Drift is the only mech he fears more than Unicron because he knows who he truly is.

Rodimus

Rodimus/Hotrod was originally a mech on the streets, he had multiple run in with the law due to illegal street racing. Prowl was originally trying to recruit him as an undercover agent, he meets Deadlock by chance while bootlegging energon. They become quick friends when Deadlock gets him out of trouble quickly, they begin hanging out alot and are nearly inseparable, Hotrod helping Deadlock with his withdrawals, keeping him busy and never taking it personally when Deadlock lost his temper from the withdrawals. When they went to one of the Decepticons rallys, Hotrod was tempted to join but it was when he met Megatron it changed his mind. In truth if he had met Megatron before he had started becoming the paranoid mech, Hotrod most likely would have been friends with Megatron. But seeing the crowd of angry mech following Megatron's every word has Hotrod ready to get out of there.

He stays an unaligned bot for quite a bit. But eventually joins Optimus begrudgingly. He doesn't agree with either side of this war, but to him, the Autobots are the most moral at that time. But when the burning on Nyon happens, he hates himself, he hates both the Autobots and Decepticons, and he despises the matrix of leadership more than anything. He hates what he's been made to be. He lives with so much guilt, and he doesn't know how to deal with it, Drift can see it, and he organises the ship. Rodimus finds it easier to run away from cybertron, so he does. But when Megatron joins the crew, it throws a wrench in the works. Rodimus wants to scream at Optimus at Megatron. He doesn't want to be near the mech who shoots him through the spark. But over time he comes to realise how lost Megatron is, it takes alot of time for either of them to be comfortable near each other.

It's a day Rodimus is struggling with reports. He wants to scream t his own prosessor for not being able to focus. Megatron drops something into his servo to fidget with before sitting at the other side of the table as he works quietly on reports. And it's the first time Rodimus says thank you to Megatron,it takes both of them a moment before they settle back into quietly working.

Here's a list of oldest to youngest in my headcanons

Rung - old as fuck, he is god

Drift- this man is old, no one knows just how old tho

Ratchet - he's not as old as drift but still pretty aged

Optimus, Rodimus, Megatron - all around the same millennia, Optimus being older that Rodimus and Megatron, Rodimus only have a decade on Megatron.

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[warrior-cats-rewritten]

If I had to rewrite Changing Skies:

Tawnypelt

The Clans are going to fight the humans.

Tigerstar is too busy leading and keeping everyone calm, so he sends Tawnypelt and whatever friends she wants to go on a mission to find out how they can stop the Twolegs.

Tawnypelt doesn't really WANT to, but does it because she wants her son to know she trusts his judgment.

She brings along Crowfeather (let me cook) and Brambleclaw. (LET ME COOK)

First major event is Crowfeather dying. He gets a terrible wound on his back leg from doing something Tawnypelt TOLD HIM NOT TO, and the infection kills him.

Tawny and Bramble are on their own now, and tensions are high. Not only that, but they have NO CLUE what to do, and the Twolegs are getting closer every day...

The only clue they have is with a strange kittypet named Rufus, wearing a strange bulky collar.

Tawnypelt is getting angry, and tired with Brambleclaw. He isn't the brother she thought he was, and their relationship has been fractured since the reveal that he trained in The Dark Forest. Sure, she supported him during TBC, but that ended up not being HIM and it was a terrible mistake to make...

It's his insistence that she listen to him, that he "prove himself", that he is the choice-maker and... Tawny's had enough.

"Brambleclaw, you're older than most cats around the lake, for Starclan's sake, GROW UP ALREADY!"

He leaves, insisting that he knows what is best, and she'll feel so sorry once he's right! No one ever believes in him, just because of his father!

She finds his body the next day. Rufus helps her bury him, but there isn't time to dwell, she needs to keep going. Rufus keeps walking up to humans wearing sleek white pelts that hild little flashing boxes up to Tawnypelt, he keeps saying it's fine but the way he lets them PICK him UP is going to give her a heart attack!

Kids these days. (Affectionate. Bewildered. 3 seconds from signing adoption papers.)

Leafstar

Leafstar is suffering from depression, and notices that her sight is starting to dim.

Fidgetflake tells her that she is developing cataracts, and Leafstar just takes it as "one more thing to happen to me". Her mate has died, her daughter Stormheart was killed in the horrific war against Splashstar and Berrystar that she herself barely made it out of with her last life... Her children have grown and have kits of their own, they don't need her anymore, cats don't want to talk with her...

She's completely lost her spark, and finds no joy in anything. She's not only losing her vision in a physical sense, but she's lost her 'vision' for Skyclan.

She also needs to hold the election for a new deputy, as Skyclan does things differently, and Hawkwing has been killed by a polluted stream.

The candidates are: Violetshine (who now has trained Beetlepaw instead of Reedclaw), Macgyver, and Rileypool (death swapped with Sagenose and mentored Kitescratch).

Violetshine is selected, and immediately some cats are calling for her to be made leader instead. A vote goes through, but not enough cats vote in the theoretical Violetstar's favour. (She doesn't mind!)

Leafstar is distraught when the construction comes Skyclan's way, poisoning their main stream and leading MANY cats to sickness, including her sweet granddaughter Wrenflight, born of Harrybrook and Bellaleaf.

The others Clans have less sympathy. Skyclan is using kittyp-er Daylight Warriors, they'll be fine if they just go back inside their homes. Maybe Starclan's angry that they're taking resources.

She slams her paw down onto the Moonpool's thin frozen surface, it cracks beneath her paw, the cold water spreading its horrible chill, ignored as Leafstar snarls at Starclan.

"Answer my pleas, stop punishing me, or my Clan, or I am taking us back to The Gorge, Other Clans be damned. Help us, or you will prove to me that you truly are a bunch of useless dead cats parading around with sparkling fur and empty promises!"

A ghostly figure appears, just for a moment, whispering to her.

"You may not have sight any longer, and I know all hope seems lost, Leafstar, but brighter times are coming. Do Not Let The Moon Fall."

Moonpaw

Since the writers wanna be awful about Sunbeam, I'm going to one-up them and do this pre-emptively.

Nightheart brought Sunbeam to Riverclan. He wasn't made Leader or Deputy, no, that was given to Icewing and Minnowtail.

Sunbeam, tragically, passed in childbirth soon after she got pregnant by accident... She left Nightheart with a single kitten, a tiny tortoiseshell tabby molly with a white chest, and wide blue and yellow eyes.

Nightheart, still stubborn about names and meaning and holding a grudge against his mother for not providing him with the Orange Gene, names his daughter Moonkit, determined to constantly remind her how she Doesn't Have To Be Like Sunbeam. She has quite a few friends, some in different Clans!

Moonpaw is apprenticed to Flame. An ex-Kin member that joined Riverclan during WCR!AVOS who Nightheart hates with a passion. Guess why.

Moonpaw is a good kid, but her relationship with her father is strained beyond belief. She wishes he would stop... Acting like this. Like he's the only cat to have ever suffered, stop arguing with her sweet mentor over the pettiest thing, stop comparing her to her mother in the most backwards way he can by trying to push her to somehow be the opposite of a cat she's never met...

She is good friends with Frostfeather and Whistlemoon, especially Whistlemoon, for obvious reasons. Moon buddies!

Moonpaw is dared by an older apprentice, Rapidpaw, to "go spend a night at the Moonpool when it's a new moon with all the ghosts!"

She's scared, not of the dark but if her dad finds out. "Sunbeam LOVED breaking rules!" He would always say, "But you can be good and do what YOU want. Just because your mother liked to stand out, doesn't mean you always have to! You can be special in your way!" She always saw Frostfeather glaring when he said that...

"Rule breaker." Frostfeather would scoff. "Didn't know her at all..."

Anyways, aside from a fright from a possum, she makes her way to the Moonpool with ease.

Too much ease.

She walks around, stepping into the pawprints on the ground, and batting a little plant that's growing at the entrance.

Not scary!

She walks into the main chamber, eyes sparkling and growing bigger as she lays eyes on the Moonpool for the first time.

It's the most beautiful thing she's ever seen.

In awe, Moonpaw slowly steps up to it, looking at her own reflection in the sparkling, crystal water, she pokes a paw in.

The gentle ripples lap at the edges, and Moonpaw swears she can hear a soft whispering.

Immediately though, she is bombarded with noise, giggling kittens, cats chatting with one another, and a soft warning.

"Careful, don't fall in!"

Moonpaw looks around for that voice, softer than any others, yet more clear. She stares into the crystal clear, sparkling water of the Moonpool, deeper, deeper, and deeper, drawing her in and making her more calm than she's ever felt...

She falls into the Moonpool.

[crobones]

[kicks open the door I just closed] AND ANOTHER THING

when a ghoul is turning feral, they say their name. they repeat it, over and over. "Roger. My name is Roger." like a chant. to remind themselves who they are. to hold onto the last bit of humanity they have left, because maybe if they hold tight enough, they can beat it. or maybe they can just hold on until help comes.

Cooper wasn't just distracting Roger so he could get a clean shot. He was reminding Roger of something good. BlamCo Mac & Cheese. His mom's apple pie.

When someone can't be saved, you don't want them to just focus on the fact that it's over. It's done. Waiting in that anxious fear for their every breath, because they don't know if it will be their last. Or, in Roger's case - and the case for any Ghouls out there still surviving - their last moments of control.

The sad fact of the matter is that, feral ghouls are still alive. They're not zombies. They hunger, they drool, they eat, but they can hide, too. They can gather. Being feral isn't dying, it's worse. They've not even just gone to base instincts - they've lost any and all sense of self preservation. They can sprint and throw themselves at prey because the body has simply become a vehicle for that hunger.

They don't hide or gather to stay safe. They do it because it's easier to take down someone if they're surprised and outnumbered. So yes, a feral ghoul can think. But only insofar that they can find a way to feed that hunger.

But even animals have some sense of self-preservation. (Unless, of course, they're rabid.)

To be feral is to experience such complete ego death that a person has no sense of identity outside of hunger and fear. So they try to hold onto control by reminding themselves who they are. "I am Roger." And so, it's not too far of a stretch to say that a person's humanity lies within their memories.

Cooper asked Roger if he remembered what food tasted like, back when he could taste. Before the radiation and necrosis. As most people know, certain senses like taste and smell can trigger a stronger memory than any words or chants.

What Cooper did to Roger was a mercy. It was simple. It wasn't a countdown or closing his eyes, just so that the last thing Roger could feel is fear. He reminded Roger of something good, like the taste of apple pie. Of his mom. Of being a kid again. Ghouls are people, but for those last few seconds, Roger was the most human he'd probably been in twenty-eight years.

And so what's going to happen when the Ghoul runs out of vials? Not Cooper, but the Ghoul. The character. The facade Cooper Howard has been wearing like a second skin. It's wrinkled, irradiated, and necrotic, but it's tight. It's safe. It's kept him alive. To survive, he willfully distanced himself from his humanity and became a monster. Cooper Howard didn't die. He's been buried alive in a coffin for centuries, feeding off of scraps. But he put himself in there.

So when the Ghoul runs out of vials, he'll do what they all do when they're trying to hold on. They'll hold on to their humanity by tooth and nail. "I am Cooper."

It'll be the first time anyone who didn't know him before the bombs ever hears his name. The first time Lucy connects who the Ghoul is to who Cooper Howard was, back when he was human.

It clicks in her head, subtler than a light switch. She should be happy. She should be ecstatic! She's meeting her favourite hero from her childhood! But all she can feel is sadness. She saw what her mother became, and she quickly proved to the Ghoul that she can put him down when the time comes. If she can do that for her mother, she can do that for him.

But how will she give Cooper those last seconds of humanity? Does she think he deserves it? Fuck deserving it, she'll decide to do it just because it's the kindest thing to do. But she didn't know him before. Didn't know his favourite tastes and smells. But she can probably guess.

Maybe it's the scent of his wife's perfume. Maybe it's the taste of hot coco. Or maybe it's Janey. Just Janey. In any form, any memory. So Lucy does that for him. And after two centuries, Cooper Howard finally remembers how it felt to be human. If only for a few moments.

[record scratch]

I don't want to end it on that. It's too much, even for me. Cooper Howard remembers his humanity and holds on long enough. He's saved. (Hey, Maximus carries RadAway, maybe he can carry other drugs.)

Now Cooper has to sit and deal with the tidal wave that is his humanity fully resurfacing so strongly after several lifetimes. The Ghoul has done a lot of things Cooper would disapprove of. More bad things than any good things he ever did when he was human. But they were all choices he made. Cooper's always been there. Just below the surface. He buried himself in that coffin. And what's more monstrous - to kill and be cruel to survive, or to hide from the responsibility and act like it was someone else all those times? Who is the monster, the Ghoul or Cooper Howard?

Inner turmoil. GIVE ME INNER TURMOIL.

meanwhile, Lucy can lose sleep over the idea that you should never meet your heroes. That maybe she likes the monster, better - but she doesn't know which is which either. They find themselves. They find each other. They find themselves inside of each other. Cannibalism, vore, allegory, etc, etc. they find his dick inside her. Happy ending. fuck you. fuck me!

[bookofmirth]

Can I ask who's side you were on from the Ember bonus chapter? Or are you kind of neutral on it?

Oof this is so complex, anon. This is going to be so long. And I doubt that this conversation will be settled any time soon.

I wouldn't say that I am neutral because I have Thoughts and Feelings, but I think Rhys and Nesta both had good points and did dumb things. I know this post leans in Nesta's favor, but it's not anti anyone. It's more my thoughts about how complex the situation was, and why I think people did the things they did, what was motivating them. Let me explain:

Should Nesta have consulted someone about giving the mask to Bryce, even just to borrow it? Yeah, I think she should have. I knew that she had done that prior to having read the bonus chapter, and in the back of my head I thought it was so... weird for her to have given this important object of power to Bryce without asking for anyone else's opinion? I felt like I was missing some context, like why does Nesta just hold onto these objects all the time and do with them what she wills? Guess my unease was right, because other characters do NOT like how she handles the trove.

The stakes from Nesta being wrong about this were insanely, astronomically high. And "astronomical" isn't even a metaphor in this case, it's literal. She wasn't wrong, but that is a huge, gigantic, ridiculous risk to have taken. Everyone in acotar knows that the Daglan/Asteri are the beings who oppressed them thousands of years ago, and now they have proof in Bryce's arrival that the Daglan are still up to their old tricks. For the Daglan to then have these objects of immense power, potentially?? OOF. And Nesta is newer to the fae world, she may not fully grasp the gravity of the situation, so she probably wasn't working with complete understanding of the implications.

I mentioned that the group chat has been ACTIVE on this topic, and @areyoudreaminof (I think it was Kelsey, if not correct me) said that perhaps Nesta was thinking that by doing this, she could help humans in some way. Maybe not the humans she grew up with, but somewhere, Nesta thought, maybe she could do something good for other people who are effectively powerless. So I understand why Nesta did it. This was also after she had spent a bunch of time with Bryce, they learned about each other's worlds, and I think they had attained a sort of understanding.

Also side note, but people didn't trust Nesta with Made objects in acosf either and that was condescending as fuck - maybe she didn't want to be just as shitty to Bryce as everyone had been towards her. I get why people don't trust them with these objects, but in a way it comes down to underestimating them and not understanding their intentions.

Was Rhys right to have lost his mind about the mask going to another world? Absolutely. The Night Court is his responsibility, which means that everything that happens there ultimately falls to him. His fears about the Daglan invading again have been real since he saw Aelin falling through the sky. He's been thinking about these very real threats for a while. Merrill is researching other worlds and although this hasn't been confirmed, I feel like she was brought there for that reason? To give him answers? Whether or not that's true, Rhys is the High Lord and the fact that some of the most powerful objects in their possession were off galavanting in another world without his knowledge, in a way that could literally lead to the destruction of their world - Rhys being understanding and nice about it in this situation would be totally unrealistic.

Rhys has also Been Through It in terms of war, court politics, fae bullshit. He has a much better grasp of what the consequences could be if Made objects get into the wrong hands. His fears aren't hypothetical, they are very real.

HOWEVER - was Rhys right to have treated Nesta the way that he did? Absolutely fucking not. I am honestly so sick of him being a dick to Nesta just because of shit she's done to other people. Not to him. It was so hard to read descriptions of Nesta's body language when they came back into the scene, after their fight. "Nesta's shoulders tensing, her head bowing". For Nesta to have been so thoroughly chastised by someone who already has a history of treating her like shit, it made me so mad. For Nesta, who has gone through so much growth and made so many strides to not hate herself, to regain confidence and better awareness of herself, to have been made to feel small - it makes me so, so mad honestly.

The thing is, we don't actually know the content of their argument, what Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel said to Nesta. All we have gotten thus far is the aftermath. Maybe Rhys tried to be tactful and then Nesta pushed his buttons, as she's done in the past. All we know is how Nesta acts afterwards, which doesn't make me feel charitable in terms of how Rhys handled it.

I think - and again I'll need to read more of the context of this fight which I assume we will see in acotar5 - but I think that one of the main reasons Rhys was pissed off and reacted the way he did was because of his ego (and fear, even if it's justifiable). He's so used to calling all the shots, to having everything under control, that I think he's not used to anyone else having power on the same level as him. Power in this sense refers to authority, the ability for other people to make these kinds of decisions without consulting him. He's used to being the Big Man in Charge and Nesta is clearly a threat to that. This is all my headcanon/assumptions about how he's feeling, but... I'd be surprised if I'm off the mark, based on his past behaviors and the way he makes executive decisions without consulting the IC, who ostensibly exist in order to support him.

Basically, I think that Nesta was on shaky ground in letting Bryce borrow the mask even though it did turn out okay in the end, but Rhys was wrong for acting out the way that he did.

This is only somewhat related to your actual question, but I think that this is one of the scenes that we will see in acotar5, made possible by having Azriel's POV, him as the main character.

[fatuismooches]

Hi!!! This is my first time saying anything here, so yayyy! But I say that one ask from another anon talking about how Dottore had never recorded fragile!reader's voice before and then forgot what it sounds like, and my brain made some jumps and--

I like to think that sometimes, whether when Dottore is just working in the room while reader sleeps (I like to think that he's modified himself enough that he doesn't need as much sleep as regular humans) or if he's also in the bed with you, that sometimes, reader's sleeping form reminds him a little too much of when reader was in a coma. Or perhaps, even worse, and that reader's time had come while he was sleeping/working. Immediately, he has to reassure himself that you're not, in fact, dead, by either going to check their pulse and keeping his hand there longer than it needs to be (what if they die the second he takes it off??) or, if he was closer to them or sleeping with them (in the literal sense), by even just listening to it. And he tries to rationalize it with himself (bc he's so i denial, I already know it) by being like "noooo, i'm not worried!! I'm a great doctor, and I have nothing to worry about!! I'm just... checking for abnormalities!!" as if he isn't just doing it to make sure they're still alive.

Idk, the thought just popped into my head. He's lost them before without a chance of saying goodbye, and he never wants it to happen again, especially if this time they'll be gone for good.

I'd like to think that reader wasn't really aware of it until one night when he was making a little more noise than usual, and they woke up groggily to find him with their ear on their chest, desperately holding onto you as if you were going to die any second. And then the second he realized you were awake, moved off was like "Hello, I'm not doing anything sus whattt"

So now reader knows he does it, but allows it because they think it's kind of cute, but also because they know that he would never admit his fears.

Anyway, I'm kinda tired, so I don't know if this actually makes any sense. But slay!!

Thank you for feeding us Dottore content, and I hope you have a good day or night!!

You've known Zandik for a long time. So you are very aware that he has weaknesses. Yes, even though the scholar tried to hide it, his walls would slowly chip away during those late nights spent in the dorm or on expeditions. But Dottore? After you woke up, you wondered if Dottore had any weaknesses. Dottore seemed to be a man of no fear, but perhaps you should have expected that because what would someone as God-like as him have to fear now? He has much power in his grasp, surely there is nothing that could bother him. He's no longer the same Zandik you once knew, and that's okay really, but you just wonder to yourself sometimes. Little did you know Dottore's one and only fear was about you.

Il Dottore considers himself a rational man in every possible subject area. Yes, he does not allow himself to be swayed by anything as irrational as emotion and instead focuses on logic. Whether his final decision is cruel or unethical is not something he cares about. But you... you are the exception. You are the variable he cannot control. And so irrationality is one of the things he despises, swore to himself he'd never be a victim of, but here he was anyway. Succumbing to an irrational mindset is the last thing he thought he'd do.

Often times when Dottore sleeps with you, he doesn't actually sleep. He gets into the bed to appease you, because it brings you comfort, (your words) lays there for a bit until you fall asleep, and resumes his work. He is just far, far too busy to stay. But, nowadays, he finds it even harder than usual to say. Why? Because of his irrational mind, once again. He needs to know that you are alive. Which is a dumb fear really, you're not going to die, you're not going to leave, your body is stable (for now) so there's no need to worry. But he needs to know. He needs confirmation. You know. He really hates that you've done this to him. He hates it. But he can't blame you, only himself, because if he cured you already he would never have to deal with irrationality again.

Dottore is used to the quietness of a human heart, from his experiments of course, clicking his tongue in annoyance from how easily they died and feeling no emotion. But your heart, if your heart stopped... well, his madness would not be transcribed to paper very well, because it would be too hard to describe. But he denies that. And he especially denies it to you. He denies it, so that's why he finds himself counting your heart's beats per minute anyway. But now you know that even the great Il Dottore has a fear and weakness. After all, when it's only the two of you, he is only Zandik, the same man who fell hard for you all those centuries ago. But that's okay. You promised to always be there, even if he doesn't want you to be.

[zombielovesbrainz]

RAMBLING

first on my list is ben, he's been my favorite ever since i started watching the show

ive recently been rewatching jwcc and came across the monorail scene and i was thinking of how could those possibly be able to handle a human?? i looked at the wiki and they only seem to be 55 pounds and ben is at LEAST double their weight (im just guessing by his official height 5'4 and his thin body at the time) and even then if they were that strong wouldn't they rip through his clothes and scratch him up? he was holding onto darius for quite a bit so with darius and the pterandon pulling he must of gotten some sort of injury since the pterandon is portrayed to have a lot more strength than it actually does. i believe he should have some sort of scarring around his waist/stomach with the amount of force the pterandon had on him.

the monorail event definitely scarred his brain though/j, he ended up lost and away from everyone for about a month, so obviously he had to change to survive on his own. with his ranting on the monorail before getting attacked, he mentions that he's "sick of being scared all the time", "holding everyone back", saying he "can't do this." he has to change so much in order to survive even though the constant change in the season (escaping dinosaurs just to bump into others later, not having proper order, just all the chaos) must've taken a big toll on him. while in season 2, he kind of has a set schedule for every day? it's usually just wake up, eat, drink, sleep, repeat, but each time he seemingly loses more and more of his sanity with bumpy not letting him properly rest. after that whole fight with bumpy he is on his own, this I guess attracts the compys that try to attack him. but now that he is on his own he has to fight his own battles, he finally faces the compys and scares them away, he celebrates, becomes jungle ben, faces off toro. that kind of stuff, i don't really like how it happened that fast, obviously winning his own battle must've felt great, but how could his mindset change so easily? but the new confidence in himself was such a great start to the new ben that he becomes later.

i believe he may have some type of neurological disorder other than the anxiety that was shown specifically in season 4, along with yaz's PSTD. at first when they got on the island, it's like a lot of them clicked with each other, all except for ben, this makes me believe that he may just do things on a different frequency than others (totally not projecting) i believe he may be on the spectrum, with all the phobias, general anxiety even at the beginning of the show, his timidness and reluctance to involve himself with the others, difficulty adjusting to the environment of camp cretaceous. it feels all too real to me tbh, and even though he has a hard time with all of this, the show still did amazing with self discovery, growth, and learning. all without having to completely change a character. but i do think jungle ben isn't just an outfit or mindset, i think this is how he responds to the horrible amount of distress and anxiety of being alone and needing to survive, he's never HAD to do it on his own, so im thinking this is his way to cope with it. ik this isn't enough to say he's autistic, im just referencing instances in the show that led me to that belief.

an extra thing with no proof is that i hc ben to be hard of hearing for the sole fact that i am hard of hearing and there aren't any characters out there that i enjoy and are hard of hearing 😔

i love bens journey with discovering himself and how he can change while still being comfortable in the show, it was shown almost perfectly (only saying almost because i didn't think that the pacing was all that great sometimes) and i love this show with all of my heart, ive watched all 5 seasons maybe 6-7 times by now, been around since it first came out and ive loved it since 😁

i do not know if i said anything that may be taken in another way, it is almost midnight and i just wanted to ramble about a few episodes and how i see ben 😔 (definitely will be writing more tomorrow)

[finding-arcadia]

The Intuitive Analysis of my Blorbo 😇, Mr. Derek Hale

The reason I latched onto Derek like I did, is because as an Empath, the amazing way he was portrayed by Tyler Hoechlin, his backstory, and how he responded to stimulus around him, really pulled me into him. He made me feel what he was going through. There are some rare performances that can really connect with me, like they were a real tangible person, and his is one of them.

I don't know how much insight I can give into him that I, or other beautiful people in the Fandom, haven't already. But I will give as brief an overview as I can.

The fact that Derek is a werewolf, and born that way, already changes everything from the beginning. His lived experience is already different from the jump. Much like people from two completely different cultures will have different perspectives, manners, ways of speaking, etc. He's already leading with instinct/intuition and hasn't lost touch with that, while others tend to be really connected with it as a child and then become conditioned out of listening to that feeling in your gut or that intuitive hit because as a child that's seen as "silly" or not "real". But being born with that, and born of people who also possess this ability, he's going to have that part of himself nutured instead of minimized.

He's also the middle child, but the only boy, so he's got an interesting dynamic that way. He's likely seen as more "special" or more included than the typical middle child. But being the middle of two girls, he was still likely the scapegoat and teamed up on because of it. It's likely made him more careful and thoughtful with his words and actions. Also, he's probably very connected to his family, maybe more than most humans. Which also points to that animal instinct.

Being the middle child, I feel, might also make him more susceptible to suggestion, but also, oddly enough, he's kind of a good bullshit detector. Unfortunately, he tends to have a big blind spot for bullshit when his heart is involved. This boy is a big ol' marshmallow.

He's sustained so much trauma because he was/is such a beautiful soul who wanted to believe in the power of love. He wore his heart on his sleeve, and everybody saw that, and some people exploited that to their own ends. So much that Derek completely closed himself off when his own pure heart led to his family being killed.

When we first see Derek in Teen Wolf, his sister (the last family he had that was alive/not comatose) had just been killed. He's already completely shrouded himself internally and externally in that pain he still holds in his very soul, and built it up around him like a wall. He's put on his leather jacket and scowl as an armor to keep people out. Even as gorgeous as he is, he didn't look very approachable, so people usually gave him a wide berth. And it's this very armor he's created that actually makes it harder for him to connect with Scott and Stiles, initially.

While Stiles understands the grief personally, it takes him a while to see that in Derek because the man is so incredibly guarded.

But it's impossible to show the needed vulnerability to create the necessary camaraderie because, to Derek, vulnerability means weakness, and leads to death. Though it makes sense that the one person he was able to let the wall down with was Stiles. Despite their initial animosity, Stiles has proven his loyalty, his tenacity, and his understanding. Derek instinctively knows that he can trust Stiles, and he slowly begins to let him in.

A lot of what we see from Derek in the beginning is survival mode, trying to control a situation because he's feeling out of control, which creates more animosity. He becomes the Alpha because someone needs to be, and he's the only one who knows enough between him and Scott. Plus, he isn't going to give his family's spark to a newbie wolf.

Then he's building a pack because that's all he knows. He does everything he's only ever seen other people do. He's running purely on instinct and of course non-wolves are not going to understand that.

Anyway, to cut this short, once he's out of survival mode and he's had time to process what's happened, he becomes a mentor to Scott. That soft marshmallow boy starts to peek out. Then we see him emerge even more once he's more settled, like when dealing with his son, Eli.

All in all, Derek is a major soft wolf who was hardened by his trauma, but he was able to slowly connect with people again. He was able to trust and create a pack and a community with the people in Beacon Hills, and he was able to step more fully into who he truly was, which was proven most profoundly when he had his rebirth and evolved to complete the full wolf shift.

Derek Hale was one of the most fascinating, complex, and engaging characters on Teen Wolf for me. He will always be my Blorbo. ❤️

[sunderwight]

Scenario where Crowley, actually being crow-like rather than snake-like in this regard (or perhaps dragon-like) has spent a lot of his time on earth accumulating a hoard of supernatural treasures that he just sort of keeps shoved in a storage unit somewhere.

Most of it are things that other demons or angels have lost on Earth, or occult tools that humans have made that proved a little too effective at doing dangerous or inconvenient things that like, threaten to unleash the hordes of hell onto the world (Hell approves of intervening because the understaffing issue means they don't actually want a whole bunch of demons suddenly taking unsanctioned holidays on Earth). But basically if an angel accidentally drops their celestial harp or some guy comes up with a way to hack a direct line to Satan, Crowley goes and fetches the relevant artifact and then, because Hell's bureaucracy is a joke and they never actually check, he just sort of keeps hold of them instead of sending them back to head office.

Crowley's got his own unit somewhere full of Indiana Jones style treasures. Holy grail, Ark of the Covenant type shit. Half of it is broken and a lot of it even he is uncertain of the provenance of, whether it was made by angels or demons or humans in some cases is tricky to discern, and some of those things are just objects that were causing trouble or seemed liable to and so he grabbed them and stuffed them in a box and forgot about them.

Usually he brings the books to Aziraphale first, but there are some he's grabbed while they were in "not speaking to one another" phases of their relationship, and Crowley only cared to remember to show them to the angel if he thought that Aziraphale would find them interesting. (Crowley, despite having spent a lot of time listening to Aziraphale talk about books, still does not actually know a lot about books, and so is not always a good judge of what might be interesting.)

Basically where this is going is: Crowley has had the Book of Life moldering in his storage locker for decades, and he has no idea. It just looks like a kind of shabby, big old book! There isn't even a title on the cover, and he could never get it to open, so he thought it was a dud book or something (again, he doesn't really 'get' books). He got it off of some charlatan occultists in the 1500's who were running a con about being able to summon angels, but then actually did manage to summon Aziraphale, which annoyed Crowley (interrupted dinner) so he stormed in all demon-like, put the fear of Satan into them, and took away all of their stuff. He would have shown Aziraphale the book, but they got into a fight straight afterwards so instead Crowley just added it to his hoard of crap and completely forgot it existed. The renaissance was going on, there were a lot of distractions! How would Heaven even lose something as important as the Book of Life?

Anyway, this has led to a massive misunderstanding that coincided with Aziraphale's genuine interest in books, where the Metatron thinks that Aziraphale somehow figured out that the Book of Life went missing and has been covertly blackmailing him for centuries with the offer to discreetly find it (via various rare book dealers and underground book circles specializing in occult books, like prophetic tomes and etc), and Aziraphale just thinks he's successfully convinced Heaven's upper management that a bookshop is a perfectly good celestial embassy.

[2n2n]

(Hey do you know if hanako kun seal come off, the entire world will fall in disrray..... * that was close-!!* *heart thumping*)

If you don’t mind me asking, what’s your opinion on this?

It's primarily just a joke because Aida-sensei messed up and didn't include the seal on a random drawing suddenly... but I do think it's worth looking at the joke itself. Rather than imagining a Hanako saying "I'M FREE!!" or "nyahahaha", AidaIro-sensei imagine him desperate to secure it back onto his face... we can think of that as something! The gag drawing could be Kou trying to force it back on or idk, Hanako doing something silly without limits, but it's Hanako scared it came off. We can just take the silly drawing as a statement of: Hanako's desperate to keep that thang on. What does it mean to be a dog desperate to stay chained?

I do think Hanako's seal is important to him, and something he seems to want to keep. I often say it but-- I imagine Nene-chan could probably just peel it using her powers, right? But he never asks her to, and he never alludes to his seal as some sort of pain, or problem, or annoyance. There is no underhanded goal to get it off. He doesn't joke about it; he acts as if it is entirely not there and not a concern for anyone, despite it being so plain and obvious. Nene-chan seemingly hasn't worried about it ever since Kou's vague explanation, and Hanako isn't interested in doing any correcting or expositing. He isn't defensive about it, or self-pitying.

I think the seal represents repression, "holding back". Nothing could be more important to Hanako than repression, amirite? I think it's an important memory, whatever occurred, that he doesn't want to lose as a reference point. Because the Minamoto family were aware of the Red House, and their grandma forbade them from ever nearing it, and at some point, also sealed Hanako, we can assume the sealing of Hanako may have touched upon a lot of sensitivities.

Hanako is a person who deflects everything. He is cryptic, obtuse, he jokes and handwaves things, he lies. He's always compromising, or trying to run away. He'll only tell Nene-chan his wish when he believes he will never see her again. He seems afraid of leaning into his own feelings. He won't say anything out loud, not until pushed to the limit, and even then, he doesn't cede much. He is a person who surely feels it would be bad if he did all he wanted, or told the truth. Perhaps the truth is ugly, or what he wants is terrifying.

As Yako talks about "going berserk", Hanako touches his seal. He seems uncomfortable with the notion "you're still you; you don't become somebody else".

Perhaps for Hanako, it would be convenient to believe you become somebody else, or are fundamentally altered. Perhaps he would like to not have to owe all of his actions to only himself, his nature. It would be more convenient to be infected with something external that makes you behave badly, than simply have your heart speak out in its natural tongue.

(by the way, this is why I don't personally like drawing a distinction between 'Amane' and 'Hanako', and I think it is drinking the kool-aid to argue their difference. I do not think the manga's message would be "well, you're different!" versus the FAR more potent message of "you're still you, no matter what", especially when we're arguing about the personhood or authenticity of people like Tsukasa and Mitsuba. We shouldn't be calling anybody 'fake' or 'gone', and we shouldn't really be calling damaged people 'irreparably altered and lost'. Surely, we should accept and love all of somebody, and see them as themselves, at their best, or at their worst. Lost, confused, fractured-- Hanako and Amane have the same heart, and it is miserably in love.)

As humans, it's relatable. We'd often like to imagine it's not our own fault, or not our nature when we react to something. We like to think of some people as "bringing out something bad" in us, or influencing us, changing us, to become bad-- due to THEIR nature, not OURS. We don't like to take ownership of who we are. It's a complicated notion for Hanako, who both wants to be held accountable and given credit for the choices Amane made.....

.... and struggles with full ownership of his selves, his past, his present, his future. Or perhaps he struggles with the continuity of his existence? Those fragmented, lost, altered parts?

... all things his seal makes me think about.

Could Amane really become this? What Hanako is? Could Amane do all Hanako has done. I mean yes, but.... things he has to think about.

The boy behind that seal-- what did he do? What was he like? If we remove Hanako's seal, will some part of him come back-- a part he doesn't want to interface with? Is he reluctant to have access to certain power? Just how much is really behind it? It is a warping abstraction, is it an irrational sense of self-apprehension, or could it be that dramatic?

I enjoy AidaIro joking "the entire world will fall in disarray", it's like his catastrophizing is fodder for THEM to mock (I love how they bully Amane.... the normal Amane is normally useless...)

Well, whatever the case... he must be attached to the self that is sealed, the way he behaves now. He seems to prefer this for himself, but Hanako hates himself.

meanwhile sympathy for Aida-sensei who has to flipflop between sealed and unsealed boys as she draws the living and the dead boy for any random chapter or event. I cannot imagine. it's literally sf hard when drawing the boys to mind the seals.

[radellama]

Volume 3 contains Yukine's ablution, which is one of my favourite early story arcs!

There were threads for this planted in vol2, so we know that Yukine's poor behaviours are affecting Yato. It's becoming a problem as Yukine's acting out is not only worsening Yato's health, but making it VERY difficult for the two of them to work together when they need to.

He is stubbornly prideful of Yukine, despite them not getting along and seemingly not able to understand each other. Though, as we know, Gods share a body and mind with their Shinki, so Yato definitely does understand Yukine - a lot more intimately than the teen seems to realise.

This is why I find these events so interesting... Yato could've punished Yukine, or been more forceful in making him understand what he's inflicting on his master, but Yato allowed Yukine to be a little shit in order to understand himself better.

Yato allowed Yukine to act out so much in order to get his own catharsis.

He knew there wasn't anything he could say or do that would work better than to let him figure it out for himself, and he gave Yukine the room to do so.

There's clearly some kind of potential Yato sees in Yukine, and though you could argue that Yato is holding onto him so tightly is due to him being a lesser known God who's already had trouble keeping regalia, I don't think his stubbornness towards Yukine is out of his own self interest.. at least not that way.

I highly doubt that a God who knows that he might not come back would put his life on the line like this without something much deeper than it merely being too inconvenient to search for and name a new Shinki.

We see so many people suggesting and even insisting Yato get rid of Yukine, and implications that demonstrate how taboo it is for Yukine to do this to his master, and for Yato to hold on to him despite that. He doesn't even entertain the idea, and this almost kills both of them.

Throughout this volume, Hiyori is preoccupied with all the new and strange information she's learning about Yato. If it weren't for her also putting her life on the line to not only carry Yato to Kofuku's, but also to recruit Kazuma for the ablution AND provide support during the ceremony, both Yato and Yukine would've perished.

Yukine lied and denied his involvement in Yato's condition, angry and embarrassed right up until he understands that Yato isn't going to give up on him. With that realisation, he begins to confess his sins and complete the ceremony, and from this point forward there is a stronger bond between the two.

Yato's life isn't ideal and Yukine's made it clear how much he hates living under him, and though he yearned so much for his lost humanity that he began to hate the near shore, it was the humanity of others around him that ultimately saved him.

I know this is more gushing while I recount story beats, but I can't help it I really love this part. I'll probably bring it up again in future arcs because it's such an interesting anchor to frame their relationship and individual character, and provides a great reference point for how they'll develop as the plot moves along.

[chloe-spade]

The Island Prince Act One: A Brand New Shore

Sil looked at the ship below him, watching some new humans enter the boat. He didn't know what to think about them other than they looked like him—a human. But he was clueless about everything else.

"Hey," greeted Ruggie. "You look lost."

"Are you sure I can come with you guys?" Sil asked. "I mean, I am pretty clueless about everything outside this island and it's all I ever known all of my life after I woke up. I guess, I'm asking if I'm truly ready to leave this place?"

"If you think you do," Ruggie answered. "If you are curious about life outside this island, I'd say go for it. But I can never tell you what you want. That's for you to decide."

"Okay, I'll tell you in the morning," Sil reassured himself as he gazed at the ocean again.

"If it means anything, I'd like to show you around." Ruggie smiled as he walked away from Sil.

"You can't possibly consider this," Epel scoffed. "They don't know you and or what you want. How can we trust them?"

Sil sighs, walks over to the cliff's edge, and questions everything.

🏝️

Where is the land I come from?

Who lives where I was born?

Why do my memories start with a storm?

What if I have a family

Somewhere beyond the sea?

Could there be someone there missing me?

🏝️

Sil felt ill at the thought of a human family who had searched for him. Did they continue to look, or did they give up after they realized it was pointless? Did Sil ever want to know the answer?

🏝️

Tell me why I'm not sleeping, and my heart is leaping inside me

Could this be one of those times when your feelings decide?

🏝️

Sil decided that his questions needed to be answered the following day, and if that meant leaving this island to find out, he would.

"I am glad you can join us," Lilia grinned. Let's show you what you desire most.

Sil didn't know why, but he felt safe with Lilia, probably because of the man's carefree attitude and knowledge of the wildlife that both knew about. Sil can even tell things that Lilia never knew before and would get a heartfelt laugh, which he felt in his heart.

"You must be the most knowledgeable man I have ever met," Lilia laughed. "I hope we can talk like this more, but it seems I have to look after Malleus."

Sil nodded as Lilia departed, but his gaze was at Ruggie again, curious about him. He was a human with animal-like features and could talk to animals like he could. How? Why?

🏝️

Why does he look through circles?

Why does he hide his feet?

Why do I feel so shy when we meet?

Is this the tree he sleeps in?

What can he see from there?

Could there be new horizons to share?

🏝️

Sil gulped as he tried to approach Ruggie but stepped back, unaware of how to talk to Ruggie when looking at the sea. He didn't want to bother him; he must be swamped.

🏝️

All these questions keep turning and churning and burning inside me

What are these feelings I feel when he's here by my side?

I need to know these answers

I need to find my way

Seize my tomorrow

Learn my yesterday

I need to take these chances

Let all my feelings show

Can't tell what's waiting

Still, I need to go

I need to know

🏝️

Sil hums as he holds onto the sails, letting the wind blow through his hair. He waved at the dolphins that jumped up high to greet him. Unaware of him, Ruggie watched from below, smiling at him.

Ruggie didn't know that Sil could have such a connection with animals without being a beastman, which was rare in his world.

🏝️

Isn't he just amazing?

Daring and bold and sure

Different from those that I've met before

Do you think he might like me?

How do I look tonight?

🏝️

Ruggie got distracted while stirring the boat, looking at Sil, who was caring for his animal friends. Only a few humans cared for animals like that unless they were vets.

But he wanted to make Sil comfortable, which was odd. He had never felt like that before, even with someone like Riddle, who was supposed to be his fiance.

🏝️

I just want everything to be right

All these questions keep turning and churning and burning inside me

What are these feelings I feel when she's here by my side?

🏝️

"Ruggie?"

Ruggie looked over and gasped at Sil, now decked out in a beautiful silk suit that seemed to be Malleus's but fit him perfectly, and his hair in a small ponytail.

"Do you like it?"

"Y-yeah," gulped Ruggie. "Was this your idea?"

"I got curious and wanted to wear it," Sil blushed.

"You look astouding," Ruggie mumbled under his breath.

"Thank you." Sil smiled.

Ruggie watched Sil walk down to his animal friends to show his new looks. He was happy with the change, which made Ruggie weak. Sil saw a blush on Ruggie's face and now had one of his own. This feeling was new to him, but maybe Ruggie could help him.

🏝️

I need to know these answers

I need to find my way

Seize my tomorrow

Learn my yesterday

I need to take these chances

Let all my feelings show

Can't tell what's waiting

Still, I need to go

I need to know

🏝️

"All Aboard!" called a sailor as the boat entered a nearby dock. Sil gasped at the new site of what Malleus called a town, with people around talking amongst each other. He almost wanted to jump down when Riddle grabbed his arm, mainly to advise him not to.

"I know you must be pretty excited," Riddle smiled. "But I do advise you to take things slow and walk."

"Oh, sorry," Sil flushed, looking down.

"You don't need to apologize," Riddle whispered. "I understand completely. Now, let us depart."

Sil watched as everyone else walked down a board with random fancy people greeting them. He had never seen so many people who looked like him before, human. But he wasn't afraid; he was more excited.

"Prince Riddle, Prince Ruggie, Prince Malleus and King Lilia has arrived." Announced a knight without taking a breath.

They all walked out and waved at the people, with a confused Sil following them. Everyone gasped at seeing the wildlife that followed him and was also bewildered.

"Wow, a lot of people." Epel concluded.

"Indeed, but it seems Leona is scaring them," Vil spoke.

"Oh, that's how I like it." Leona yawned as he crept down next to Silver. It makes protecting Sil easier."

"Since when did you care?

"Considering we are in an unknown land, keeping him safe is best. Who knows what these people can do." Leona explained. "Humans are predictable, Vil. No matter what they do, they will always find the weakest link and will sap the life out of you when they have a chance."

"Hmm, he does a have a point." Epel shrugged.

"I hope that isn't true," Sil spoke up nervously.

The Carriage came, and a guard opened the door for them. Lilia, Riddle, and Malleus entered, and Ruggie was about to enter before looking back at Sil.

"You want to ride?" He asked with a grin.

Sil didn't have time to answer before Vil went inside, and Lilia petted his head, not minding at all.

"Uh, maybe?" Sil gulped. "I don't know how to ride it. But I have a feeling that I may not enjoy it."

He heard Lilia laugh from inside the Carriage.

"But I think it's a safer option than walking," Ruggie said. "I mean, that lion of yours doesn't seem like the riding type."

"Oh, he did not," Epel gasped.

"He did," Vil confirmed.

"Get on, Sil," Leona growled. "This human has not seen me at my full speed yet."

Sil smiles and sits on Leona's back, and Leona starts walking before speeding up. The Carriage begins to go forward, trying to keep up with Leona, but the lion doesn't slow down, and Sil holds on with Epel on his lap. He can't help but turn to the Carriage and wave at it, adding salt to the driver's wound.

"Oh, that lion is fast," The horse panted. "Amazing."

"He may be lazy, but he can be fast when he wants to," Sil laughed.

Leona slowed by the fountain as they entered the kingdom's entrance, letting Sil get off him.

"Thank you, Leona." Sil grinned.

"Heh, I can't wait to see that human's face."

"Oh, how immature," Vil huffed, exiting the Carriage.

"I thought it was fun!" cheered Epel, bouncing up and down.

"I am glad you enjoyed yourself." Rook grinned and landed on the fountain. He looked so fast; it was remarkable."

"A fast lion," remarked Malleus. "I had never seen one in my entire life, although I had never seen a lion run so far. But even lions, like himself, can get offended."

Leona groaned at Malleus.

"I mean, he can be fast, but sometimes he chooses not to," chuckled Sil. "It's just something he doesn't want to do."

"Ruggie!" called out a voice from the stairs.

An elderly woman rushed down their stairs towards Ruggie, pulling his ear angrily. Ruggie winced at it, trying to pull her hand away.

"You! You said you'd be back by yesterday afternoon," she lectured. "Why were you so late? And," she paused as she noticed Sil. "Oh? And who are you, my dear?"

Sil blinked before stammering a little. "I'm Sil…I am from an island that they visited."

"Proposterous," scoffed another voice. "No one can be from an island."

"But I am, ma'am."

The woman he saw was glaring at him up and down, clearly dismissing Sil. Her rose-patterned dress flashed red when she twirled around him before she scoffed again.

"You? From an Island?"

"Mother, he is," Riddle spoke up. "We all saw him."

"And you chose to take him here?" The woman snarled. "Such an improper man shouldn't be here as what I can."

"Queen Icabeth," the elderly woman rolled her eyes. "Maybe he was shipwrecked. We don't know his story."

"But that's impossible,Edna," Icabeth spoke. "Then why he is dressed so perfectly?"

"I was told to dress for the ocasion," Sil explained.

"Ugh, she's so rude," Epel huffed. "I want to chew that dress apart."

"No, you don't," Sil said, looking back at Epel. "We are their guests, and we should be nice to them."

"I'm sorry," Icabeth said, appalled, placing her hand on her chest. "Did you talk to that thing?"

"Yes, and his name is Epel, and he is a red panda." Sil explained, picking him up.

"Well, I'll be," Edna laughed. "A human that can speak with animals? I thought I could never see the day."

"I know, Grandma," Ruggie agreed. "He has had this ability since he woke up. Lilia wanted him to come with us."

"You did, Ruggie," Lilia corrected.

Ruggie blushed and lowered his ears, embarrassed.

"Ha! Well, I can't say no to a special guest now can I?" Edna smiles and goes over to Sil. "Sil, corret? I welcome you to my kingdom, and I shall have someone put your room togather."

"A room?" Sil asked, confused.

"I do believe it might be best if he were in the garden house, Edna," Lilia said. "He needs to be eased into learning about our customs. And I have a feeling that sleeping in a tree would be perfect after a long trip."

"You might be right."

🏝️

"I can't sleep," Sil mumbled, looking at Lilia.

Lilia visited Sil that night, only to see him awake and conflicted. So Lilia climbed up to help him sleep.

"I can tell that Icabeth's words had hurt your feelings," Lilia sighed. "Don't pay her no mind. She's just very pompous, but that's not an excuse to be rude, you know."

"I know, but I wanted to make a good first impression." Sil sighed. "But she was so insulting. How can Ruggie marry her son if she's so mean?"

"Trust me," Lilia laughed. "Riddle is nothing like his mother, even when it seemed like that at first, but once you get to know him, I promise you that he'll be the best person to be around."

Sil nodded and rested against the tree.

"Can you sing me something?" Sil whispered. "I would normally do that, but I don't feel like it."

Lilia smiled. "Of course."

Lilia let Sil rest on his shoulder, and he started to sing.

🏝️

Sun goes down, and we are here together

Fireflies glow like a thousand charms

Stay with me, and you can dream forever

Right here in my arms

🏝️

Silver gasped softly as he heard Lilia sing the lullaby he had heard in his dreams and the song he would sing to Epel. But how did Lilia know this song? Was it common here?

"Where.."

"It was a song that I used to sing wth my son a lot," Lilia explained. "He always loved it. Do you want me to continue?"

Sil nodded.

🏝️

It's magic when you are here beside me

Close your eyes, and let me hold you tight

Everything that I could ever need is

Right here in my arms tonight

🏝

Lilia looked back as Sil sang that last line with him before falling asleep. He watched as Sil began to fall asleep on the branch, not caring about how uncomfortable it may be. Lilia carefully laid him down, using his jacket as a makeshift blanket, and then carefully climbed down.

"Good night."

Llia walked away, returned to his room, and sat silently on his bed.

He hates it when the room is silent. After a while, he hears the crashing of waves and the screams of everybody who tries to hang onto the ship as the storm progresses. He heard the cries of his son, who he lost that night and hasn't found since. He always hoped he would, but sometimes, there are moments when he wants to lose that hope. However, people like Malleus remind him that it's not too late.

He walked towards the window and looked back at the greenhouse, watching Sil sleep peacefully.

🏝️

Sounds of day fade away

Stars begin to climb

Melodies fill the breeze

Sweeter all the time

Sweeter all the time…

🏝️

"If that is you, my son…" Lilia yawned. "I hope I can tell you. But not at this moment."

Lilia closed his blinds and went to bed, hoping for a new day.

🏝️

"So, you like this so far?" asked Rook as Sil climbed down the tree.

"I mean, it's not so welcoming as I hoped," Sil sighed. "but I do feel much more better after what the king did last night, but I cannot help but wonder why he knows the song I sang before."

"Maybe it's a neighborhood song," Vil suggested. "I mean, he must have before."

Sil nodded as he came down. He looked at the sky and watched the clouds move along, creating beautiful scenery.

"Sil?"

"Oh? Ruugie?"

Sil turned to see Ruggie holding a tray of food, one plate for each animal.

"You made me breakfast? How thoughtful?" Sil blushed.

"It's not my doing, but I wanted to give it to you personally," Ruggie chuckled. "As an apology for yesterday."

"Oh no," Sil looked down. "I just happen to be a stranger, and she reacted normally to someone like me."

"That's not how I saw it," Ruggie huffed. I saw someone who is just new being unfairly judged. And Riddle and I want to help you."

"Help me? With what?"

"Well, to put it simply, to fit in, but only for a few hours," Ruggie explained. "Look, that's such a rude way to put it."

"No, no, I understand," Sil reassured. "If I have to stay, I must learn about the customs here. I am not offended, and I'm offered you helped me with this."

"And if you need to take a break, you can tell me or Riddle." Ruggie smiled. "You always have us, and everyone else…except Queen Icabeth of course."

Sil smiled again.

"Has he said yes?" called out Riddle, walking into the greenhouse.

"I did."

"Good, but let's not dally," Riddle said. "We need to change you and your animals, and we'll get started on your new day."

"Why are we involved?" Leona snarled.

"Well, you guys don't have to."

"And miss the chance to meet up with the royals," Vil gasped. "I don't think so!"

"Well, it's settled then."

🏝️

"You look good with green, I'm almost jealous," chuckled Ruggie as Sil examined himself in the mirror.

"Do I? I always wanted to know how I looked with different colors, but I never exactly thought of it before." Sil sighed. "I have never considered my life before, so…should I be scared?"

"Of my mother, you should," Riddle answered. "I know that my mother can be, unfortunately crazed. She always wants thing to be perfect which is why we had to wed. No offense to Ruggie."

"No, none at all." Ruggie chuckled. "But we can't call it off now can we?"

"I'm sorry about that," Sil spoke up.

"Don't worry, we should be able to handle it, but we should be focusing on you, not each other and I'm sure your peacock is ready for morning tea," Riddle chuckled.

"He's always ready."

As the four departed from the guest room, they watched as butlers and maids prepared morning tea, preparing delightful biscuits that seemed a little too yummy for Sil.

"I know," Ruggie laughed. "It's delicious. But I learned my lesson years ago, wait until they are ready."

"You must've loved these treats," Sil acknowledged.

"A little too much," sighed Riddle. I heard he ate all the pantries when he was about four."

"Of course, my grandmother told you about that," groaned Ruggie. "No matter what I do, she will always tell that story. And I did apologize."

Sil laughed. "Well, I can't wait to try that. Well, actually I have a question to ask?"

"Ask away?"

"So, I have a lullaby I sing to my animals often," Sil explains. "But King Lilia sang it to me last night. Is it a common lullaby here?"

"From what I heard, not really?" Riddle answered. "But I do think Malleus knows. He and Lilia are quite close and he will be there for the morning tea."

"Thank you, I just wanted to know."

Sil nervously looked away. He was starting to realize that his amnesia was quite unfortunate, and trying even to find his origins was going to be difficult.

They arrived at the table, full of sweets and tea. Sil looked around, amazed about everything.

"Welcome," Queen Edna greeted. "I'm glad you managed to come by, Sil."

"Thank you, ma'am."

"And pleasantly dressed, I noticed," Queen Icabeth also huffed. "I'll let you off the hook this time."

"Mother, he wanted to learn," Riddle explained. "So we have dressed him."

"And green certainly is his color," Lilia grinned. "You should dress in green more often."

"Thank you, Lilia," Sil smiles as Ruggie leads him to his seat. "If you don't mind I brought Vil with me. He wanted to see the royal festivities."

"Oh, how thoughtful of you," Edna grinned and grabbed a cookie. "Of course, I love new company. Don't you agree, Kalim?"

Sil gasped as an albino monkey jumped onto Ruggie's shoulder.

"H-hey!" Ruggie gasped. "Kalim! This is my food.."

"I know, but I love coconut cookies," Kalim grinned. "And you promised me one!"

Sil smiles and gives Kalim a coconut cookie. "You know, you need to ask for one."

Kalim jumped happily and took the cookie. "Thank you! What's your name?"

"Oh, it's Sil, nice to meet you."

"He can talk to the monkey," Icabeth groaned.

"Oh, she's here?" Kalim tilted his head. "I forgot about her."

"Don't we all," Ruggie muttered, sipping his tea. "Oh, is this…uh, hibiscus?"

"It is," Riddle remarked after taking a sip. "It's rather refreshing."

Sil looked at his tea and took a sip, but he jolted as the hot water hit his lips. Riddle noticed and looked over.

"Hold the handle," Riddle instructed. "And carefully sip slowly."

Sil nodded and took a sip. He sighs, breathing in the hibiscus air.

"Oh, it's like warm hibiscus water," Sil smiles. "I had some like this, but you had to take the seeds and mix it all together until it created the flavor."

"Hm," Vil nodded. "Much prefer this over what Leona makes."

"Oh, please," Sil laughed. "Leona's food isn't that bad."

"Lilia may beg to differ," Malleus joked. "I suppose his cooking could be prepared to a mere animals."

"Malleus!" Lilia huffed. "My cooking is not that bad. You even enjoyed some of it."

"Before getting sick," Malleus added. "Sincerely, Sil, I wouldn't have you eat his cooking."

Lilia rolled his eyes. "May I have another tray of cookies please?"

The butler nodded his head, handing the tray over to Lilia.

"So, how did you two get engaged?" Sil asked. "Oh, well, I couldn't help but wonder."

"I'm surprised you know what that even means," Icabeth muttered.

"Mother," Riddle hissed.

"Oh, not by choice," Ruggie explains. "But Riddle was someone whom I considered a friend. Her mother one day asked us if we should consider marriage, and you know, I said yes. However, it was different from what I had planned for myself."

"But we knew these two were meant to be together," Icabeth grinned.

"I see," Sil nodded.

Sil looks over at Riddle, who sadly looks at Malleus, sipping his tea.

"Well, what happens if he loved someone else?"

"Pardon?" Icabeth scoffed. "I don't see why you need to know."

"It's just a simple question." Sil defended. "But do they love each other? I haven't seen anything that resembles it."

"What do you know about love, island boy?" Icabeth demanded. "You are a mere peasant as far as I am concerned. And again, you have no business to know anything."

Sil sighs and eats a cookie, now annoyed.

"You seem pretty pratical," Lilia spoke. "You seem to know more than you let on, Sil."

"I have some books that came with me after my accident," Sil explains. "One was about a prince and peasent falling in love and marrying each other, despite the social pressure from the king."

"Oh, you mean "Love has no Rules"?" Malleus asked. "That was Lilia's favorite book, but he lost it years ago."

"But I do remember the story by heart," Lilia grinned. "Shame that I lost it after my boat got destoryed in that storm."

"It's a shame, indded." Malleus agreed. "But I do think it's amazing that Sil knew that story."

"Uh, yeah." Sil blushed.

"Hm, somehow you are well educated," Icabeth sipped her tea.

The butler came around with a tray of cookies, but Icabeth managed to set her foot in front of the butler and tripped him, causing him to spill the jelly cookies all over Sil.

Sil gasped and stood up. "Uh..I'm sorry, I have to go."

Sil turns and rushes away, embarrassed.

"Sil!" Vil cried, now after his friend.

"Hey, Sil!" Ruggie called out, now following him.

"Ugh, he can't stay with his fiance?" Icabeth snarled. "I hope this attitude changes when the ball arrives."

"I know," Edna agreed.

🏝️

"Ugh, that women is going to be on my last nerve," Ruggie groaned. "I mean, that was low for a queen like her for her."

"Poor Sil," Kalim added, still on Ruggie's shoulder. "He sees charming and friendly. And smart to."

"Much more smarter than Icabeth predicted," Ruggie claimed. "She thinks just because he's an island boy, he isn't intelligent and proper. But he proved us wrong."

"Of course he's proper," Vil huffed. "I taught him how to be."

They arrived at the greenhouse, looking at Sil tending to a wilted rose.

"Wow, you look like how I feel," Sil remarked, now giving it water.

"Hey," Ruggie panted. "Knew I found you here."

"Oh, Ruggie…ugh, I'm sorry I embarassed you and everyone else."

"You don't have to apologize for nothing!" Vil spoke up. "That women did that on purprose!"

"You're lucky it wasn't tea." Kalim added. "It'll burn."

Sil laughed and nodded. "I am lucky. But I feel…ashamed of myself."

"Don't. She wants you to be," Ruggie remarked. "She's making it very clear that she doesn't like you, at all."

"She doesn't like anyone?"

"Nope. I'm sure she doesn't like me either," Ruggie chuckles. "But since I'm marrying her son, she tolerating me."

Sil sighs and looks down.

"Hey, how about we go to the pantry?"Ruggie offered.

"Won't your grandmother get upset?" Sil asked.

"Yeah, but I want to make you happy."

Ruggie pulls Sil up and looks back. "Don't worry, you are incredibly welcomed here. Don't forget that."

[starlightshadowsworld]

Imagine if my Casey raised by Shredder AU combined with my hc that Casey killed Shredder.

Because apparently I thrive on angst and this broke my fucking heart so here we are sharing this... Concept.

Where Shredder was mutated against his will.

Becoming Super Shredder.

Perhaps by the Krang or one of his underlings, maybe Tigerclaw because they felt he was too weak.

Because this Shredder has a heart.

He changed.

He grew.

He was a bad guy but he loved.

Oh he loved.

And the mutagen rips that man apart.

Turning him into a weapon.

A monster.

It takes everything in Casey not to scream.

This isn't his father.... It can't be.

The man who picked up his injured form.

And cradled him till he fell asleep in his arms.

The one who went to all his games no matter what else was going on.

This beast had killed Splinter.

This monster had hurt Karai.

This wasn't his father.

Who begrudgingly respected his brother.

And adored his sister and him with all he had.

... But it was his father.

And Casey knew deep down what had to be done.

And who had to do it.

He's never been more thankful for his mask.

Casey picked up Leo's fallen sword.

Twirling it, taking a deep breathe.

And lunged.

He'll replay this night for the rest of his life.

Ushering them away.

That if they were going to pay their final goodbyes it was now or never.

No one noticed how he stayed.

They didn't question why he stayed.

Lost in their own greif and shock.

"Thank you"

He's not sure who says it but goes silent.

Before approaching the body.

No one outside the foot knows Casey's relation to Shredder.

"I'm sorry..."

Casey barely registers that he's shaking.

That his knees have buckled underneath him.

And for once their is no one to catch him.

Eyes stare up at his.

Human.

Barely grasping onto him.

Barely grasping onto life.

"Do not cry my son"

"I'm sorry...I..."

A hand caresses his cheek.

Cold but gentle.

"I am so proud of you, Oroku Casey."

"Don't leave me..."

"I will never be gone, I will forever be in your heart."

"Please..."

"Goodbye, my son."

"... Goodbye, dad"

It's only when the rain begins to fall does Casey sob.

At some point another is holding him.

He looks up into the tear streaked eyes of his sister.

"I..."

Karai holds him tighter, taking his hand in hers.

Neither speak.

Their is nothing to say.

They couldn't save their father, not like how he saved them.

All they had was each other.

They buried him as per tradition.

But neither moved.

As if doing so would destroy them.

"Hey we're having a party, might as celebrate... But are you alright man?"

"Huh?"

"Case... You haven't said anything since you erm... Killed the Shredder."

"I... I'm fine.."

[silly-inky]

Have been thinking on writing a Booigi fic, I was prompted by one of those inspirational TikTok's lol, and a bit of my daydreaming. Anyways it's a past lovers story, king Boo remembering bits from when he was alive and Luigi being there, and while he stayed dead, Luigi was well, rencarnated after he passed, thought it would be a cool concept, sort of playing into one of those soulmate au's. Anyways, here is the first snipit that I have so far ( played around with some poetry for the first part, forgive me lol)

You were someone to me a lifetime ago

"I feel like I know you from somewhere in my memories from my days of living, but those memories are sparce and finite. I had tryed desperately to hold onto them, grasping at them, pleading them not to leave my hollow mind. But they would trickle through my fingers. Like cusping your hands to act as a vessell for water so you can drink from it, but the water slowly seeps out, as you try in vein to make it stop. No matter how hard you clutch your hands together, the water will always find a way out, and you will be left with nothing apart from the wet surace on your hands reminding you they once held the water, but the water is now gone.

I know I had memories. and that knowledge torments me. knowing i once held something so precious, and I will never get to know what exactly I lost, and I will never get them back. I don't remember who i was. If i was good, if i was bad, if i was someone too you. I don't even remember my old name. But I think you where there. I can't remember the way you made me feel. But you where there. Who were you too me?

Why does that bother me? you are a curious little human. I can't get you out of my head you cling to the spaces my old memories used to live. it's not fair. other ghosts get too keep their memories if their will is strong enough. So why do we Boo's not get that option? Was I not strong enough? if I wasn't what gives the others a chance. Why are we different." King Boo rambled to himself.

He was staring at the picture of Luigi and E.Gadd on the table on opposite side of the room from him, he was focused on Luigi, he was smiling, hugging the professor, judging from the Poltergust he was wearing, it was probably after his first encounter with King Boo. He looked nice when he smiled.

" That's oddly poetic. But the answer to that is simple really..." E. Gadd said breaking the silence, entering th room, approaching the king in his enclosure

he continued "You are residual energy. energy left over from when you where alive, brought back by large amounts of energy charging your own. you guys are not like the other Spirits that are brought back because they clung to their life, you are brought back to carry on."

" I didn't know you were there." king Boo hissed, anger lacing his voice as he spoke

"Is that truly what you think happens?" he spoke again, questioning E. Gadd's words

" it's still a working theory. But yes, it aligns with my research the most." he spoke out"And i don't think Luigi will be able to answer those questions, if you do think he was someone inyour past life, it was probably a past lire of his as well. Do you think that links to your obsession with him?"

"And why would I tell you that?" king Boo snapped

"This is the longest conversation we've had in years. I'm just suprised your still talking with me, but we've gotten this far. And I think you want an answer to that as well" E. Gadd spoke calmly, showing he isn't scared of the king

"Ghost's have obsessions, that's not strange" king Boo said as he turned his back on the scientist

"And he always gets in the way of my plans, he is my greatest enemy, that's not too outlandish is it?"

"Maybe not, but then Why do you keep luring him back in? chasing after him? why not just get it over and done with? He means something to you, you can't deny that. Someone's enemy wouldn't be so curious how they mattered to them in their past life. He makes you curious. Why not just try talking to him?" E. Gadd said stepping closer to the king

"It's not that simple." The king spat out

" Maybe not. But try it regardless, he's coming over later, try then" E. Gadd replied

" Why is he coming over, you're not performing more tests are you " The king asked hesitantly, turning back around to face the old man

" As tempting as that is, no. He likes to come an visit on the weekends. I think he's worried I'll blow something up again. It's nice having the company, and hemmakes delicious food, you should try it if you get the chance."

he pauses "he is not malicious, if you're willing to talk to him, he won't ignore you." E.Gadd finally said" Yeah, yeah, I hear ya. can you leave now, your giving me a headache" king Boo answered, entertaing the thought

" fine, fine, see you later king Boo" he said as he walked away amused

"Damn kook" king Boo said under his breath

"this isn't going to end well" he said to himself

Here is the post Where the Ao3 fic is linked ★

[miniscrew-anon]

Merry Whumpmas - Day 4 "Chills"

Okay now I'm really getting into the meat of Shadows backstory. Because of who he is as a person I fully believe he was a little shithead for his whole life. Not necessarily because he wanted to be but because that's what life handed him.

Trigger warnings for mentions of human trafficking

It was another special order. Delivered word of mouth, as usual. 

Tween, pale, male. Under four feet and 100 lbs. Dark hair, purple eyes. Park Twili. Unused, perfect condition.

Shadow mentally filters through his memories for someone to fit that description and comes up empty handed. He’ll have to go outside his usual search radius to find someone that specific. Twili aren’t common in Hyrule, and certainly not this far South. 

He clicks his tongue and strolls away from the meeting house, annoyed. It’s unlikely he’ll find someone that matches. So he can kiss that commission goodbye. Still, there are other jobs. Routing cops and spotting Sheika aren’t necessarily easy but it’ll tide him over, for a little while. 

Until another special order comes through. Those, he’s learned, are the real money makers. 

Young, teen, Brunette, blonde. Green eyes, blue eyes. Goron, Zora, Gerudo - Vaati liked to pride himself on customer satisfaction and filling orders to a T. No customer of Vaati’s ever had to settle for second rate wares. High quality, he liked to say, nothing worn or used. No diseases, no defects, no behavioral issues. A perfectly healthy stock. 

In other words - free range.

Vaati often uses his network of young eyes to find potential… merchandise. Their homes, patterns, and ideal pick up locations were all reported to higher ups and left to bagmen, who’d secure and ship out the goods. 

It was a much more risky business than the run of the mill trafficking that relied on easy prey. It meant fewer lost souls from the gutter that no one would miss and more from nice homes and happy families. But the value far outweighed the cost; Shadow isn't sure how much a single person is worth to Vaati’s clientele, but they must be willing to pay exorbitant fees to have their every demand met. 

Sometimes, when Shadow finds himself in a strange mood, he finds himself thinking about what might have happened to the poor bastards he reported on. What kind of life they were living, if they still were. It always made his spine tingle.

But he never lingers on it long. And why should he? It’s not like he’s really responsible for anything that happens. All he does is search out someone who fits the description and tell someone else about it. Not like he does any smashing or grabbing. He never laid a hand on anyone.

And besides, if it wasn’t Shadow doing it, it would be some other kid selling out someone for a handful of cash. This cog turns with or without him. No point in holding onto dumb ideas of morality when the alternative is starving in the streets, or falling in with some gang where he’d end up killing someone anyway. 

No, there wasn’t any point in trying to take the high road. Shadow knows from experience that that kind of shit is for TV - the real world isn’t going to change because someone decides to be a good person. It won’t make a difference anyway. There’s always going to be another asshole ready to step in and take his place, so why give up his spot? 

Better to be scum with a full belly and a roof than to be scum wasting away on the side of the road.

------

I don't think Shadow is an innocent at the end of the day. I think that just like Dark, he was kind of forced to take what was available to him and do what he needed to to survive. He's going to justify it any way he can, but deep down he knows what he's doing is fucked up. But fuck if he's going to acknowledge it.

Idk what the full timeline of events are but I'm going off the assumption that the Dragmire Empire has just been toppled about a year or two ago, Dark is currently in prison and the hold that Ganon had over Hyrules underbelly is basically dissolved. Vaati is just one of many smaller time guys who rose through the ranks and gained a shit ton of power. And his particular domain is the human trafficking going on in Hyrule.

[systemadministratorclu]

Milo Thatch

Tag: His RP posts will be tagged "muse: milo thatch" and will include the verse in parentheses.

Full Name: Milo James Thatch (no, the J is not 'just a J')

Age: Differs depending on verse/thread, but he always appears 32 (his age in the first movie)

Species: Human (also known as Terran)

Gender: Male

Hair/Eye color: Brown (his hair is considered light brown)

Medical: Low vision. Without his glasses, he only sees colors with very blurry undefined edges and some pronounced movement. He is also very allergic to carrots.

Appearance: He's about 5' 8" and pretty skinny, though he gained a bit more muscle on the trip to Atlantis and has gotten more since living there, as he's become much more active there. His eyesight isn't very good (everything looks blurry) so he has to wear glasses, which he only takes off to sleep or to wash. He wears a glowing light blue crystal pendant like everyone else in Atlantis wears. He also has a tattoo of a star on his left shoulder, as shown below:

Sexuality: Gay

Bio/Verses:

Canon-ish verse:

His parents died in a railway accident involving a bad fire when he was three. They shielded him with their bodies and died when a piece of debris fell on them. He sometimes has vivid flashbacks where he relives the accident, even to the point of acting/behaving as though he can't breathe (because his mind is telling him he can't). When he's brought out of one of these, he may cry some, then he usually sleeps for a while. In addition to flashbacks, he also still has nightmares about the accident and has a fear of trains because of it, though he hasn't told many people this because it's embarrassing to him

His grandfather took him in and raised him when his parents died, and this is where he got his love for all things Atlantis.

Throughout childhood, he was bullied and picked on for his small size, intelligence, and glasses. He had several pairs stolen and/or broken, leading to some instances of him getting lost or injured on his way to or from school. (this did not impede his education, the man graduated high school at age 11 and currently has two doctorate degrees in Linguistic Theory and Dead Languages //his mun, however, does not.//)

He had only one girlfriend and she eventually left him for someone with money who she thought was better-looking by actually taking Milo to some big gala the guy was holding and pretty much humiliating him (poor Milo was so hurt by this, he didn't remember how he got home). He's tried dating (women and later some men, which is how he found out he's gay), but was met with rejections and being stood up. This has left him afraid to tell someone if he has feelings for them because he doesn't want to be hurt again.

On the way to Atlantis, Lyle Rourke assisted him several times, such as getting him to the Aqua-EVAC vehicle safely (and getting him out of it when they surfaced and he was still in a bit of shock) and getting him food when he got sick after eating the meal Cookie had made. He found himself connecting more to Rourke on the trip, probably because Rourke was not picking on him or pranking him.

In Atlantis, Helga revealed herself to be a greedy treasure hunter and forced Milo to help her find the Heart of Atlantis, even having her henchman punch him before she left Atlantis. After Rourke and the dying king gave him a sort of pep talk, he led the others to retrieve the Heart, but was shot during the fight and injured. Rourke intervened before Helga or her goon could kill Milo on board the Gyro-EVAC balloon. Milo scratched Helga with a piece of crystal from the Heart's container, causing her to crystallize while Rourke attempted to carry him back up onto the gondola of the Gyro-EVAC. However, Helga chased them and caused Rourke to drop Milo. Milo was very badly injured when he fell from the balloon, having landed hard on the ground, including broken bones and some other wounds. He was retrieved by Rourke and returned to Atlantis, where Rourke admitted to a dying Milo that he loved him. Sweet said he couldn't save Milo, but after the city was saved, he was taken up and healed by the Heart of Atlantis, after which he admitted his love for Rourke and the two decided to stay in Atlantis together.

Heart of Atlantis verse:

This is pretty similar to Canon-ish, but it it's based on an idea running through several of my fanfics. In this verse, Milo's grandfather was actually Prince Talos, the younger brother of Atlantis' king. Not much is different from the previous verse (except that Rourke has confessed love for Milo, and Milo revealed his love for Rourke the night before they arrived in Atlantis) until they visit the Heart of Atlantis. Here, Milo is chosen as the Crystal's host instead of Kida. He found out after the battle for the Heart about his Atlantean heritage, making him royal blood (a prince) and thus an option to be chosen (in threads where he's married to Rourke, this means Rourke is also an option, as he becomes a royal prince consort by marriage). This also means that should something happen to Kida, or she decide to step down, Milo is next in line for the throne unless Kida has kids.

Future-verse:

Currently just with @the-haunted-office but this version of him is kinda fun and could be used in other threads. He's 9000 years old (subject to change depending on plots/threads) and a tech genius //again, mun is not, mun just thinks the idea is neat//, having built an entire mainframe, server system, and data storage facility for Atlantis. He also can (and has) hacked into the most secure systems on Earth. He's also gotten himself some engineering knowledge and will sometimes actually invent things or build things for missions (ex: in an ask thing where he and Rourke stole the Declaration of Independence (don't ask), he built a specialized container to put it in and equipment to handle it with). He also figured out how to power an Atlantean flying machine on the surface using machine batteries (big vehicle batteries and such) strapped to it without impeding its flight too much. He also built the solar chargers for said batteries.

Space verse (because why not):

Takes place after Canon-ish and Heart of Atlantis verses. Either one can be used as his background. A Star Trek-ish deal that kinda crosses with my Rovarians universe with Milo as captain of the vessel RSS Ulysses and the rest of the Atlantis cast as his senior crew (Rourke as first officer). Ulysses is a multipurpose Saturn-class heavy cruiser (think the Enterprise D from Trek) whose design is actually based on the submarine of the same name that started the trip to Atlantis (the space vessel is a lot bigger, though, as it has a lot more lab facilities and crew quarters and such on board. It has the standard warp speed drive, a high speed drive known as quantum slipstream, and the basically instantaneous transwarp drive (transwarp is only used when absolutely necessary, as it uses a lot of fuel and needs to cooldown and recharge before it can be used to "jump" again. The further you travel with it, the longer the time before it can be used again. This is why transwarp is reserved only for times when even quantum slipstream isn't fast enough). I can give you more details should we decide to do something in this AU

**The following are the same for all verses**

Personality: He's a very gentle and kind person. Initially, he's very shy and awkward, but in a sort of endearing way. He'll start to open up more as he gets to know someone and feel safer with them. This comes from getting picked on as a kid and being rejected and stood up, even when he tried to just make friends. He's afraid of being let down or hurt again. The exception is if he's nervous or you get him talking about something he's passionate about. Then it can be hard to get him to stop talking, as he gets really excited when someone takes an interest in something he likes, and he sometimes babbles when he gets nervous. He sometimes needs a bit of a confidence boost when trying something new. Regardless of all of this, he's a caring person and does his best to help others if he can. He's emotional and can sometimes be easily hurt or taken advantage of, and he sometimes cries easier than he'd like to admit. He's more outgoing in Atlantis, where he's gotten sort of a clean slate, probably due in part to the fact that he's helping the people rediscover their history and culture, and they have been nothing but good to him in return.

In a relationship: He's loyal and dependable and tries his hardest to be everything you want. However, he may keep some of his own feelings inside, afraid of seeming needy, even if his need is completely reasonable. If he gets someone, he's afraid they will decide to leave him when they find someone better. He'll get better about sharing things as he's with someone longer and he starts to realize that no, they aren't going to leave him, that they really do care about him. He very much wants to be loved and held and cared for, because it makes him feel safe and not alone.

*I mainly ship him with Rourke, but as with all my characters, I'm open to anything else if it happens. Please talk to me in DM first, though.

Trauma: He does experience nightmares and flashbacks sometimes. The three biggest incidents that cause these for him are the railway accident and fire that killed his parents, the Leviathan attack on the way to Atlantis, and the battle for the Heart where he almost died.

Other: He and Rourke occasionally visit the surface world to keep tabs on it and make sure there are no threats to Atlantis. They use whatever knowledge they gain to make sure Atlantis is able to protect itself in the even someone else finds their way down there. After all, the two of them and their group did. Because of their greatly extended lives, no matter what time they appear in, they do not appear to age at all. These surface trips are great opportunities for them to meet other muses.