#because I didnt know how to think more deeply about what I was reading or appreciate the craft
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
tubercloset Ā· 1 year ago
Text
I think a lot about rereading popular books that I chose to hate because I feel like now I will be able to understand what made them so popular. But also I didn't like them in the first place
2 notes Ā· View notes
jasontoddspussy Ā· 4 months ago
Text
Tim's Ao3 AU
just got the image of tim writing red hood x oc fanfic but the oc is basically tim/red robin and each time the A/N is like
"sorry no beta im mid-shoot out with some gang leaders atm"
and the content ranges from super fluffy to the most degenerative porn wanting to lick his skull and the authors notes are like
"heey sorry for the slow update i got shot again and im forced on bed rest but now i have an excuse to work on the next chapters!!"
now i want a fic where its like
it gets more and more outrageous, and the comments are just people debating whether its real or not and then there's 1 comment.
that comment is like.
"Pick Up Your Phone, Now. -D"
and tims like
"::) im in trouble::)"
theres one person dissing out the red hood and how he's so terrible and will never actually deserve someone loving him and tim replies with
"Loompa Roompa might malfunction for a while"
and the person is like *how the fuck do you know the name of my roombah what the hell is this why it's been turning on and off at night what the fuck*"
tims username is pretty bird or somth bcs thats what jason called him at least once before and hes like yes i can be pretty and a bird i can be whatever you want me to be
(totes not because thats what jason always calls tim in my head no no)
dick just really, really wants answers but also is deeply, deeply concerned
"tim you had a 20k fic of red hood lovingly taking care of you and hugging you like you'd never been hugged before. are you like, okay?"
"you.. you read all of that?"
"that's besides the point. now answer the question"
"i dont know how to feel about this"
"how do you think i feel? i didnt need to know about any of it"
"and yet you do. curiosity killed the cat, dick."
"alright i wont bother you if you promise to talk with dinah or some jl approved therapist about... the hugging touch starved things. if you dont tho ill just send jason your ao3 account babs said he has one so he can see all your shit'
"i think i would feel better if you just stabbed me"
dick makes a lemon bitten face.
"..."
"..."
"you saw that too, huh."
"yep."
"i dont have a kink for being stabbed. i have a jason fetish. just him and whatever he decides to do to me so dont worry i wont be out getting stabbed by randos"
"I'm glad but also i wanna circle back to the jason fetish part i feel like thats something i should worry about"
20k fanfic where tim just rants about jasons soft hoodie
jason, meanwhile, he sees someone w the username idk PrettyBirdRedHoos in his comments and hes concerned someone figured out he was robin but goes to look and this persons bookmarks are all just fics written by a 'PrettyBird" user and all of them are red hood/oc, and some of them is like; piercing kink, some of them are 20k fics where the oc falls asleep wearing their hoodie, one of them is a very specific scenario where the red hood 'playfully attacks' the OC on top of a tall building and they fuck nasty and jay is like
this. is too detailed. to be a coincidence innit.
and the comments are just people debating how real these scenarios are and every single person that disses RH has something hacked or exposed and jays like 'ah. well, timmy certainly has a hobby."
he could tell him that he knows.
he could also choose to be an absolute tease. forget a hoodie there, wear some bootyshorts here, not wear a binder while wearing a tank-top here, spit out a specific phrase tims used in a fic before just to keep him on his toes. it's fun watching him squirm.
548 notes Ā· View notes
tan1shere Ā· 2 months ago
Note
i have no idea if you do fics for eva from swarm but iā€™m begging you for another!! maybe like we join the group unknowingly but eva takes a particular liking to us? you can change stuff about that idek what iā€™m saying i just need more eva fics
(i know sheā€™s a cult leader but sheā€™s hot. arrest me šŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļøšŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø)
All Mine
Eva x female reader !
Tumblr media
A/n: yesss we love Eva here, I hope you enjoy !
Summary: there were many girls in the cult. But she was drawn to you, obsessed with you.
Warnings: smut, eva is cray cray but in a hot way (we know šŸ˜‹) eating out (r receiving) hickeys - I think that might be it, leme know if I missed anything !
Masterlist
It was 3 months in, and you loved it there your new friends, letting you stay with them after your car had broke down not far from them. You had no idea where you were heading if you were honest so when they offer you to stay you ofcourse say yes. Eva, the lead girl of the little group was the first one to find you on the side of the road.
"Fuck sake." You cursed under your breath. You then hear a voice behind you, startling you slightly. "Everything ok?" You turn to face her. "Yeah just a flat tire- probably a sign I shouldn't keep going." You awkwardly laugh a tiny bit, causing her to flash a beautiful smile, it made you go a little crazy. "Im Eva." She sticks her hand out. "Y/n."
And ever since then you've been happily living there, alongside all the others. You had your own room, just like Eva did. Which confused you to say the least. Because the others all slept in one room. Why didnt you? But those wandering questions soon enough unfolded.
There was no doubt Eva was hot, you deeply thought so. Whenever she'd speak so softly, with a hint of teasing, it was alluring. And to be honest you loved it. You didn't quite understand why, you were all just friends. Right?
"Good day?" You then hear her voice, causing you to look at her as she approaches your seat, sitting next to you. "Great thanks, Eva. It's so lovely here." Her eyes wander your face. "Good, angel. Im so glad." You look into her piercing blue eyes, feeling like you were in a trance. She was like nothing you've seen before.
You then think for a moment. "Can I ask you something?" She just nods, moving a loose strand behind your ear. "What's up?" You take a moment to process. "Why do I have a room to myself and the others don't?" She then thinks, needing to come up with a lie. "They've all had it at one point, each new girl gets to have it til they're settled in with one another." You believed anything she said, so you just smile and nod. "Makes sense!"
But suddenly it didn't make sense. You ofcourse talk to the others, but you mainly kept to yourself. "Hey Cricket!" You smile, she returns it. Patting the spot next to her. "Hey babe, everything good?" You nod with a hum. "I did have a question though." She swivels to face you. "What's on ya mind." - "How long did you have the room I'm in before you went into the main one?" Her brows furrow slightly. "I've never had that room, no body has in fact. Eva said it was just empty but nothing was going in it. Why's that?" Your mind thinks for a moment. Eva lied to you.. but for what reason.
"Oh- uh. Nothing important, I just assumed thats what had happened." You shake your head slightly, pulling yourself out of your thoughts. "Nope, you're the first actually, I didn't know that could be a bedroom to be honest." You nod, going to get up. "Yeah, well. Thanks Crick." She nods, giving you a last smile.
You march up to Eva's room and open the door, you'd usually knock but she was just sitting on her bed reading. "Everything alright love?" Her brows furrow, going to get up. She comes over to you, putting her hand delicately on your cheeks. "You lied to me, why?" Confusion strikes her. But your instant with your words. "You know exactly what I'm talking about." - "Baby, hey. I said that so you wouldn't rub it in the others faces. Did you?" You felt angry for some reason. "Ofcourse not! That's not who I am. You know that." She hums in reply. "Look, they aren't bothered that they don't have that room, they're pretty happy being in the main."
"So whyd you lie to me?" You fold your arms, but you just looked so cute in her eyes. "Because I didn't want you knowing the real reason, not them." You ponder for a moment, huh? Why though.. "i don't understand." You look into her eyes, but hers get closer by the second. Backing you up against the wall. "Let me show you." She says into your neck. Her breath causing you to shiver visibly. Your mouth opens slightly, going to put your hand in her soft hair. Her lips make contact with with your skin. Beginning to suck hard.
Noises come out of you. Liking this a bit too much. "Eva-" You gasp as she bites. She wasn't listening, continuing to suck as you let out a noise of approval. But she abruptly removes her mouth, clearly done with the task. You whimper, wanting more. And she smirks, exactly how she wanted you. "Go down for dinner hm?" She bites her lip but you freak out. "But my neck-" "good. Let them see." Your eyes widen in size, but you were so drawn to Eva. You just wanted to do exactly as she asked.
That was now a few weeks ago, nothing has actually happened and you were growing incredibly frustrated. Why hadn't she made another move like that night? It was bugging you. So you did what you thought would get her attention. You wore a short summer dress that was tight around your breasts making them sit incredibly nicely. You wanted to go for a small walk down to the gardens, but before you could leave the house a hand is gripping your wrist. "What're you wearing?" You turn to look at her. "Clothes? Can I not?" Her brow raises.
"Things are very.. tight." She says as she observes. "Don't look then." You say with a cheeky smile, about to leave again. She scoffs, pulling you back considering her grip was still tight around your wrist. "Uh uh, don't do that." - "Or what? Why do you care so much."
"When you come around looking like this, don't think I don't recognize that shit."
"Bothered?" She tilts her head, looking at your lips. She honestly had no idea why she was putting off going further with you. Maybe beyond all the sexualness she had grown to truly care for you. The fear of hurting you in any way was evident. "My room, now." Something in you changes and you do just that, loving the way her voice sounded.
You make your way up there, standing in the middle of the room. "Are you afraid of something Eva?" She sh's you, going straight to kissing your neck. She didn't want to talk right now. "But it seemed-" "Silence angel, just relax." You let out a breath you had been holding in, trying hard not to go too mental. But you ofcourse failed. Miserably. You were now laying on your back against her bed. Her ontop of you. Your brain fuzzed over when her hand slides up your thighs, inching closer and closer to you. "You're so warm." Her voice was like a whisper inside your brain. Like she wasn't real.
"Please Eva, need you so bad." You pleaded desperately. She smirks down at you, moving her hand inside to feel just how wet you had become. You gasp yet again, not as prepared for her next move. She plays with you, exactly how she's been playing with your mind. But you loved it, craved it. It never felt real. It certainly did now though. "So wet, wonder who got you like this." You try to form any kind of words. "You Eva.. you made me wet." The confession makes her go insane. Adoring how much power she has over you.
"Precious precious girl." She softly says, lifting your dress up and planting her face directly over your clothed pussy. But her hands yank them off within an instant, seeing for herself just how wound she had you. "Goodness me, angel. Get to see it all for myself." Another whimper escapes you. "All mine." She then breathes, diving in immediately after saying that. "Fuck!" You screech, but a soft hand flies to your mouth. "Quiet baby, unless you want them to hear how I'm having you right now." You shrink as she says that, feeling a lil embarrassed. "Didn't think so.." She trails off, licking your cunt real good.
Causing you to bite her hand, knowing how loud you can get. "I mean, I'd like them to hear, all those pretty noises. How much of a mess you'll be when I'm done. All, because of me" Her finger makes way into your mouth, getting you to suck. "You're so well behaved huh?" Your mind goes blank feeling like an empty piece of paper. "What a good girl, very good." Your eyes shut as her tongue enters you, her pace fast. Making your head spin. "Eva." You mumble against her finger, feeling it coming quick. "Go on baby, let me finally taste you." And with a few more fucks of her tongue. That's what you did.
Cumming all of it into her mouth. And she couldn't be more happy. "So easy to make cum. Good to know."
321 notes Ā· View notes
mythicmanuscripts Ā· 3 months ago
Note
Hi,just wanted to ask if you would be able to write about people reacting to Aegon in displaying PDA with either his wife or lover.
Like the touches are not sexual but like lingering and innocent, people can see how in love they are or how deep their connection is.
It can also be a brothel worker (I love your latest piece of work) that he cares deeply for and wouldn't mind showering her with affections as she did him.
Anyway, just saying your writings got me into knowing the dom and sub in a very gentle and comfortable way. Love you!
I'm so glad to hear you enjoy my content!! Also yeah I love when dom/sub dynamics can be so gentle and sweet and very very healthy and communicative. Loads of people tend to think that BDSM is purely slapping people and calling them whores but that's not even close to the truth. In case you guys couldnt tell I am most certainly a certified soft dom and service dom.
Anyway, I love this idea! I think I'm going to write this with Aegon and his wife instead of brothel worker? I'm very happy to do a brothel worker one if you guys would like I just think he concept makes a bit more sense with wife!reader. If you have thoughts about this with brothel worker!reader and how that would work then feel free to let me know!! I'd be happy to explain on it.
Back to the point, there's nothing too explicit in this answer so no cut to hide behind, but it's very clearly sub!aegon so bare that in mind before you decide to read :))
I've said this before and I'll say it again: at first your marriage with Aegon is like any other arranged marriage and you're only seen together when absolutely necessary. But then you start to get to know each other and your dynamic starts to become more dom/sub and from there he is absolutely OBSESSED with his wife and everyone knows it.
So the PDA starts once the dom/sub dynamic has been sorted out.
As we all know, Aegon is very needy. He's a needy, jealous kinda pathetic little thing and he wants nothing more than to watch his wife be so much smarter than him and get to be her little gremlin cheerleader who followers her around and has no thoughts whatsoever. Now obviously he's the actual king so he needs to be seen a little more in control than that, as Allicent is always reminding him, but that's not to say he actually tries to seem that way.
If you're in public with Aegon then you are always next to him. If you get called away and are gone for more than a few minutes then Aegon will start looking for you because where are you??!! You're his wife!! How are you be away from him for more than a few minutes!!
He's been known to come up from behind you and wrap both his arms around your waist, hugging you from behind and resting his head on your shoulder while you're talking to someone else. He won't actually contribute to the conversation and if the people you're talking to try to include him he simply won't respond. He's not there to actually joint the conversation, he's there because his wife is!
When he's holding court, Aegon will never allow you to be standing with all the others below the thrown. Historically that is where the queen consort has always been, standing with the other ladies of the court while the king sits on the iron thrown.
Before you two became closer you wouldnt even attend Aegon's court and he didnt care. But when you start to get closer and you start come to court, he point blank refuses to let you stand with all the other ladies. You're the queen!! What are you doing down there???
The first time this happens, you had spent the night with him and he asks you to come to court with him. You agree of course, and you enter the thrown room together. He walks as he usually does and goes up the stairs to the thrown. He turns around and he's about to sit when he realises you arent with him. He looks around and sees you've moved to the side with the other ladies of the court.
"What are you doing over there?" Aegon asks you. He tilts his head and chuckles because he thinks it's absolutely hilarious that you'd actually think you had to stand there with all of them. He tells you to come up with him, and you do walk up the stairs to the thrown but when you get there you simply speak softy to him, reminding him that there's only the iron thrown and not anything else to sit on so you ask if he wants you to stand next to him for the entire thing.
Obviously this is unacceptable to him. He would never make you do that.
He ends up insisting you sit on the actual thrown and he literally just sits on the stairs besides you. Everyone, including you, doesn't know what to think of this but Aegon has no issues whatsoever. Honestly he's very happy sitting on the stairs and listening to all the different things people come to him about. Very often he'll look up at you, silently asking for your opinion and when you do start speaking, he doesn't look back at the person you're speaking to but instead he keeps his eyes on you. He looks so very clearly in love and in awe of you and pretty quickly everyone gets used to it.
After that court day you try to suggest he gets another chair next to the thrown or something but he actually refuses? He really likes sitting on the stairs, likes that you get the thrown. When you try to tell him that you're not sure if that's even allowed he simply reminds you that he's king.
Pretty soon all the paintings of Aegon during his reign are actually him on the stairs with you on the thrown, many of them show Aegon looking up at you and not even looking straight ahead.
That really shows everyone what your dynamic is. You're always calm and collected and very kind when needed. Aegon, meanwhile, is utterly obsessed with you and is always looking at you like he's in awe you're actually his wife.
Of course you're also always holding hands when walking together, or linking arms.
201 notes Ā· View notes
1800-page-not-found Ā· 2 years ago
Text
Being drunk and complaining how you think your bf is prettier than you (genshin men x fem reader) PART 2
GUESS WHOS BACK FOR PART 2 EHEHEHHEHEHH
anyways my bad for delaying this for so long lmaoooooooo
in my defense i am lazy so
ALSO...i kinda um derived from the main like 'complaining how hes prettier than u' and its more like 'ur so fucking pretty' BUT its still good pls read it plspls i beg u
Characters:(seperate) Harbinger Scaramouche era, Wanderer Scaramouche era, Gorou, Xiao, Baizhu, Kaveh
Let me feed u again with some gorgeous men
Scaramouche was a bit annoyed. After all, as a harbinger, he had no time to deal with such idiotic things. But when he found out you overheard some unsightly humans whispering about this, he was furious. Especially because you had to be drunk to admit this to him. Did he not give you all of his heart? So why do you still not trust me? And how dare someone make you feel so insecure. "No, no," you shook your head, solemn. "I-I didn't want to bother you about such things, its alright Love, I'm fine." you cupped his face with your hands and smiled at him, assuring him it'd be ok. "E-erm.." he stuttered, flustered by you holding his face. I mean, someone as pretty as you is his girlfriend. His! "If you'd like, I do have some spare time.." he paused, looking for a reaction. Your face lit up. Drunk you was quite bold and honest. "Really?! Does that mean i have you all to myself?!" you jumped up in glee. You pulled him out your home in Snezhnaya, going to who knows where and doing god knows what. After you exhausted yourself and fell asleep in his secure arms, it was time to punish. Those foul beings never walked the entirety of Teyvat again. Waking up, you had no recollection about what you did when you were black out drunk, but your lover's public display of affection grew, from shyly holding hands and sneaking his arms around your waist to kissing you in front of everyone, and also calling you pretty, beautiful, etc.
(down below is before the Wanderer gains his memories)
The Wanderer was the equivalent to a dandelion seed that never stopped floating. But when he found you, it was like finding firm ground to grow and blossom. You made him feel things that made him whole. You showed him all sorts of emotion. One day you came home (he moved in your home) drunk, tripping over yourself. Wanderer rushed to support you as you leaned against the wall. "hehehe!" You giggled, wrapping you arms around your neck. "Y/n!" he stammered. "Gosh," You sighed, staring lovingly into your lover's eyes. "How did i get such a beautiful boyfriend?.." He was flustered, face red and all. "You're so much prettier than me and everyone...what if someone snatches you away from me!?!" you started to worry. "Y/n my love, it should be i who is afraid, you're so kind to everyone and unintentionally charismatic...theres even a fan club of you..." (he totally didnt start a fan club about you)
"Gorou baby, why are you just so cute?.." you held his face and leaned in, staring deeply at his features admiring them. Gorou wasn't accustomed to this type of affection, or affection in general. "W-what? Cute?! I-I'm not!" He was very red, closing his eyes in embarrassment after noticing his tail wagging. "My cute little general...I just wanna keep you all to myself!" You laughed, holding Gorou by the waist in one arm and holding a cup of beer in the other. "Y/nnnnnn...." he covered his face with his hands, he didn't want you to see him like this...you'd just call him cute again!
"Ohhhhhhhhh Xiaooooo over hereeee! Hehehe" you laughed, waving your arms drunkenly at Xiao as you clutched a whole bottle of dandelion wine given to you by a bard who was your friend. Xiao sighed as he walked over to you. "I didn't know an immortal would have such low alcohol tolerance...that damn bard.." He sighed again, pinching the bridge of his nose annoyed. "You're so gorgeous Xiao...my gorgeous boyfriend. So so pretty...hmmm" you collapsed forward, but fortunately, a blushing mess of a Xiao caught you and carried you bridal style (heheeh) to your home. "What nonsense are you spouting...I'm not...gorgeous or pretty..." Affection and love were new to him. make sure you give him lots of it in the future!
Baizhu, as someone who is ill, did not drink any form of alcohol that night. You however...drank both shares of alcohol given. Thus you were very, very drunk. "Baizhuuuu...." you slurred. "Yes dear?" He replied softly, smiling. "You're just...toooo pretty. Prettier than everyone hehehe!" you giggled like some high school girl in love as you looked up at his rather stunning face as you laid on his lap. "Oh my... getting flirty now are we? I think you're the most stunning and intelligent woman i've ever met!" Changsheng grimaced. "You guys are so lovey-dovey it's going to make me vomit!"
As a rather broke architect, Kaveh usually wasn't able to drink such a high-quality wine. And you, a rather wealthy individual who practically ran the fruit industry in Teyvat, travelled a lot. So this fancy dinner kaveh had cooked up and the luxurious wine you had brought back as a souvenir made a perfect romantic time at your house. I forgot to mention. The two of you were really, REALLY drunk. "God that awful man! I can't believe I have to be his roommate!" You laughed. "You could always stay with me you know. Ah but i suppose you'd get lonely...whatever! Anything my pretty boyfriend says I'll agree hehe" You stared at his face, admiring his beauty. "I mean, gosh smart and pretty?! I got soooooooooo luckyyy" Kaveh was very bashful towards your flattering comments. "I'm not pretty! I'm handsome!" He argued. "Right, right...you're handsome! Super duper handsome!" You laughed. "Stop teasing me!" He was practically a tomato! "Awwww is someone shy? I should do this more often!~" The teasing went on for a record breaking one and a half hours! I wonder if you can break the record again next time?
3K notes Ā· View notes
binniesbooks Ā· 4 months ago
Note
hi fayebae, imma send these before i go for my hiatus again(im not sure if you alr have smth planned for tyun n hyuka! cos i know u have a yj fic thats coming soon, so ill send these in for them)
was thinking of tyun x reader for this
uk the series ā€œacademy reincarnationā€!! There was a salsa dance ep! I was thinking that reader decided to sign up to the salsa academy where tyun is one of the instructors?/student! reader wanted to learn salsa for the longest time but has always been afraid to as one would usually need to dance in pairs. afraid of having any physical contact with any stranger(due to a trauma she formed from a relationship), even tho it was difficult, reader eventually let down her walls with tyun as the many practice sessions go by, she finds herself now looking forward to salsa practices as thats the only time she can see tyun! And she craves his touch. During one of the practices, they got so lost in the dance that their faces ended up really close to each other! Tension arises(she wants him, he wants her, dare i say more šŸ¤­smut of course!) [didnt wanna write too much to allow ur creative freedom!!]
i hope this is good gah(just thought i should send smth in for the other members too hehe, pls dont put aside ur wip again!! Do this after ure done w ur yj one gah) love u my soobie fav boobiešŸ’—
TENDER TOUCH
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
TH 002 .F22 2024
wc 5.3k
pairings gentle!Taehyun x abused!reader
warnings physical and sexual abuse, traumatic experience, traumatized reader, protected sex, abusive ex-boyfriend (idk what else did I miss)
faye's note *insert: Taehyun's ģ–“ė”” ģžˆģ§€ (where am I) in bobašŸ˜³* as promised, here's my second fic for the day! this is my first Taehyun fic and I'm fucking obsessed that it got up to 5.3k words, wth. Anyways, @inkigayocamman I know you requested a Tae fic, but here's another one for u to enjoy I guess while I'm still working on it. šŸ™‚ā€ā†•ļø I hope you like this too! And ofc, to my one and only Beomgyu's kitten, I love your brain, it's so sexy omfg. I'm totally sat. Plus yeah, the yj fic is still on the line. šŸ¤£ Anyway, I did a few research(again) for this fic, so I hope it turned out good, fingers crossed!
Edit: Thanks for proofreading the whole ass fic @babymochibeargyu I'm dead now. šŸ˜­šŸ˜‚ luv uuuu šŸ˜–šŸ’“
"Learn how to dance Salsa, we offer multiple dance forms for beginners to professionals. Come join us..." You mumbled reading the flyer your friend handed you.
"Jia, you know I can't do anything like this anymore." You sighed as you handed her back the flyer.
"I know, I know, it's because of your trauma, right? But maybe this is the way that can only help you overcome that trauma," She started, "I'm worried about you taking this class but I'm more worried about you carrying that trauma all throughout your life." Jia gently holds your hand, still careful not to scare you with the skin contact.
You're lost in your thought for a while thinking if you can really let go of your trauma after all this time. It's been so long since you haven't engaged in any relationship after your last one.
"I-I'll think about it." You sighed, you really wanted to be free but you just didn't know how to start. "Please do, I really wanted to help you." Jia's eyes are full of worry, sadness and guilt. Because it's been so long yet she can't do anything to help.
You've always been wanting to learn how to dance Salsa. It's like your little dream ever since, however, your boyfriend from your last relationship did not even want you to be touched nor be grazed by any man's skin. You insisted you could just pair with a girl but he threatened you to hurt anyone who will be around you if you kept on insisting to register for the dance class. You ended up not registering for the class and burying your little dance dream into the depths of your heart.
The following week, you found yourself standing in front of the dance academy building. Breathing slowly, thinking deeply whether you really want to do it or not. You were clutching on the flyer tightly. Your knees fell weak as you stumbled down, retreating all the way to the confinement of your apartment to hide from the world.
It took so much courage for you to do this. Especially when you ended up trying once again a week later. You're standing in the front of the building, staring at the swaying banner of the academy with a "SALSA DANCE ACADEMY" written on it.
You softly knocked on the door before opening it. "Hi! Come in! How may I help you?" You were greeted with s young lady, clad in a salsa dance costume. She looks bright and bubbly.
"I.. Uhm.. wanted to register for the class." You meekly answered as you slid down on the chair. "May I know your name?" The lady picked up the pen on the table and grabbed a file.
"Y/n...y/n s/n." You silently answered.
"What class would you like to be included in?" The lady's smile never faltered. Her bright aura makes you feel comfortable for a bit. "What do you offer?" You asked back.
"Well, we have group sessions and we also have one-on-one lessons," you nodded at her, signaling her to keep going. "In group sessions, there will be 15 pairs -- 30 individuals in a class, plus the 2 dance instructors," you felt pressured with just the thought of being included in the group. "In the one-on-one class, we will find you a pair if you still have none, or you can bring one, and then also a pair of instructors," she explained.
"I'll take the latter."
"Please sign here and we'll wait for another one to sign up." She smiled again at you. You were thinking of bringing your friend to the class.
"By any chance, can I bring a girl for the one-on-one class?" Her expression suddenly turned sad, "I'm afraid we are only taking a man and a woman as a pair for the one-on-one class. Usually, the pairs who sign up for the one-on-one class end up acquiring advanced skills than those who are in the group."
You thought of backing out once again but you shook your head to clear your mind. You're already here, you're already a step closer to the most awaited time of your life: to let go of your trauma.
"We'll call you once we receive another sign-up for a one-on-one class. Thank you for dropping by." The lady waved her hand as you stepped outside.
You shrunk to the corner of the door, people are looking at you but you're too occupied to even give a damn.
It's been a week. You didn't know how to explain how you felt. Half of you felt happy that you hadn't received a call yet, because that would only means you didn't have to do it anymore and there wouldn't be anymore skin contact for you to trigger your trauma. However, the other half of you felt disappointed. You would have been lying if you said that you didn't get your hopes up, thinking that this would be the way to be finally free from your trauma.
"Still haven't received a call?" Your friend placed the pizza she brought on your coffee table. Today was the day she would usually pay you a visit to your apartment. She started doing this from 2 years ago, when you and your ex-boyfriend finally broke up.
You hummed in response as you dug out the box of pizza. Nevertheless, you don't want to bring your thoughts about the dance academy again.
A couple of minutes passed when your phone rang, causing both your heads to look towards your phone
"Hello?"
"Hi! Can I talk to Ms. Y/n s/n?" The voice over the line spoke brightly.
"Y/n speaking." You just answered back, looking at your friend who's anticipating a piece of good news.
"We just want to inform you that someone already signed up for the one-on-one class as your pair. The class will start this Monday, are you fine with it?" Your friend sighed in relief as soon as she heard it.
"O-okay. Sure." You felt a rush of anxiety travel throughout your body, as your fingers trembled hanging up the call.
"Hey, it's okay." Your friend wrapped the thick blanket around your shoulders before hugging you. Afraid that she might trigger your trauma. "You'll be fine." She tries to calm you down by rubbing your back.
2 days passed by quickly. Enough to make you coil up in bed instead of getting up. Your phone vibrates from an incoming message.
Dearest Jia: Take care later, okay? I know you can do it. I won't be able to go because of work, so I hope you understand:< but I'll pick you up when you're done! <3
You: I don't feel like going.
Dearest Jia: Noooo! You've come this far. You should go, I know you can do this!
You: Fine, I'll text you when I'm done with the class.
You tossed your phone on the bed as you grunt into your pillow. You're just glad your dance class starts at 3 in the afternoon. You still had a lot of time to prepare your body and mind.
Quarter to 3, you're already in front of the building, a few people going in at the same time. Probably for the group session. You wanted to go home but the lady called you out.
"Y/n! Please come in. I'll accompany you to the assigned room. I'm Daeun, btw." She extended her hand to you but you froze. You're too afraid. But someone else caught Daeun's hand. "I'm Taehyun, the one who signed up for the pair." A tall guy appeared on your side, shaking her hand. "I-i'm y/n." You meekly introduced yourself without touching any of them. The lady looked confused at first but she shrugged it off.
"Okay, I'll leave you two here, Mr. and Mrs. Hwang are inside already."
Taehyun pushed the door open, you were both greeted with a polished wooden floor and mirror walls in the wide room. Two people were sitting in the corner. They must be your instructors.
"Please come in!" The lady waved at the both of you.
"Do you know each other?" The man asked which the both of you only answered by shaking your head.
"I think we should start our class with an introduction. Don't you think?" The lady nodded.
"I'm Mr. Hwang and this is Mrs. Hwang. She's my wife and we mainly teach one-on-one classes. You are?" They turn their gaze to Taehyun.
"My name is Kang Taehyun. I also dance but not in this genre. So I wanted to learn this." They then looked at you.
"I... I am y/n. I signed up for the class t-to overcome my t-rauma." Your words are slurred, and your reason made your instructors gasp. "I-I used to be in a r-relationship. And t-they're the reason why I can't e-even touch people or let other p- people t-touch me." You bit your lip as you look up at them.
"Honey, but I'm afraid this dance requires a lot of holding and touching, what should we do?" Mrs. Hwang clasped both of her hands on her mouth as she turned a bit emotional.
"By any chance, can you hold someone when there's a barrier between them? Like, there is no direct skin-to-skin contact?" Taehyun spoke up, you nodded lightly at him. "It's been two years so I think I can tolerate it to an extent."
"Then I think we're good Mrs. Hwang. I'm thinking of using a glove or something. If that's what makes her comfortable. I don't mind at all." Taehyun remarked.
Taehyun ended up wearing gloves for your dance class. And as much as possible, he's avoiding any of your exposed body parts. He's also lightly touching you that you feel as though it's just air grazing your body.
So far so good, the 3-hour class ended up okay. Jia picked you up 30 minutes later after you texted her that you were done.
Your dance class went well the next day. And the day after that. And the following days after that. Days became weeks, weeks became months. It's all going well, with Taehyun's careful assistance over you.
Today was the day you decided to step further to your goal.
"Taehyun, I think we can now stop using the gloves. We've been dancing for a month now and I hate it whenever I think about the gloves. It feels like I'm being disgusted by you or something." You stated to Taehyun once the two of you were on a quick break. Within one month, you grew closer to Taehyun. The quick breaks were your time to tell stories to each other.
"Are you sure? You're not making me feel like any of that, by the way. But are you sure you can do it now?" His eyes seek yours. You simply nodded as you removed your jacket leaving you with your t-shirt on.
"Are you two, okay? Shall we continue?" Your dance instructor asked, checking on you, as you and Taehyun stood up. Taehyun discarded the gloves he was using on top of his bag as he folded his long-sleeved t-shirt up to his elbow.
You started off well. Taehyun holding your hand as gently as he could as usual. Letting you turn around with some quick footwork. It was all good actually, until he needed to lean in, holding your waist and your thigh. One more turn, his arms and fingers graze through your arms. His delicate fingers holding your waist once again. A quick turnaround. A step faster. A more closer proximity.
"You fucker! Come back here! I know what you did!"
"S-stop! We're already over Han!" You squealed as you blocked the door with your body.
"You're fucking dead meat when this door opens!"
Your tears wouldn't stop flowing from your cheeks as you kept your body pressed on the banging door. Han has been your boyfriend for 9 months now. At first, he was so good to you, treating you like the princess you deserved to be. But it was too good to be true that you started to feel it was wrong. Just 2 months ago he started hurting you physically and abusing you sexually. He was too obsessed with you too that he sometimes he would start locking you up in your apartment. Even your requests got declined. At first, you let it pass as you thought it was normal. But you started earning bruises and wounds. You barely ate, barely drank, you even barely slept. You would often get fevers too. The slightest noise would make your soul jump out and the slightest movement would make you flinch.
Jia, your friend, was the one who advised you to report him. So you did, that was why he was here banging at your door.
Han's voice can no longer be heard, hence you decided to quickly hide in your closet, as you dug out your spare phone you had hidden to contact your friend.
You quickly called Jia, telling her to call the police or something but you were cut off when the door bursts open. Han was holding a gun and laughing hysterically.
"Fuck you, you bitch! You're really dead!" You quickly covered your mouth.
"Come out, kitten. Come out from wherever the fuck you're hiding!" His voice echoed through the room drowning your quiet sobs.
That's when he forcefully opened the closet you're hiding. "Ohhh, you look so scared kitten, why?" He cooed at you as his lips stretched to form a mocking grin. "Move to the bed!" You shook your head. "Fucking move to the bed!" He fired a warning shot at the mirror, crashing it. You yelped at the noise. With your trembling body, you quickly scrambled your way to the bed covering your bruised-up body.
"Strip." He commanded as he pointed the gun at you. With no choice left, and your life at stake, you did what he ordered.
He crashed his lips on yours harshly. When he noticed you didn't kiss him back, he slapped you. Blood flowed through your lips as you choked on your sobs. With the gun still pointed at your head, he started harassing you again. His hand left a bruised mark on your neck as he tightly squeezes it. You could almost see the white light as your weak body just let him do anything. There was no use thrashing around as if you had accepted your dying fate.
"Freeze!" Was the only thing you heard before everything around you went black.
You opened your eyes inside the hospital, pulled every apparatus attached to your body and started screaming. It made Jia scream out and call for a doctor. They couldn't calm you down so they needed to give you a shot for temporary sleep.
Everything came swirling back to you. Pushing Taehyun away, causing your body to crash on the wooden floor. "Shit!" Taehyun cursed under his breath as he hurriedly pushed back his sleeves and wore the gloves again, picking up your jacket at the same time, before coming back to you. Your instructors let out a shock gasp as they also rushed over to you.
"Please grab a blanket or any thick clothing!" Taehyun shouts as he tries to ease you by covering your shoulder with your jacket.
Mr. Hwang passed Taehyun his padded jacket he always brought with him. Taehyun carefully wrapped the thick jacket around your body. He holds your face as he tries to soothe you.
"Y/n, look at me, please look at me." Sweat started to form on his forehead as tears freely flowed down your cheeks. "Please, look at me, and breathe slowly. Breathe slowly. Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale." Taehyun guided your breathing as his glove-cladded hands rubbed your cheeks.
Mrs. Hwang was panicking but Mr. Hwang tried to calm her down before he went out to grab a glass of water.
Your heartbeat slowed down for at least a bit. Taehyun guiding you helped somehow as you slowly calmed down. Taehyun got the water from Mr. Hwang and held it in front of you as he let you sip on the water slowly.
"Are you feeling okay now?" Taehyun tucked your sweaty hair behind your ears. His eyes were full of worry. "Do you wanna go home and rest?" He's still carefully rubbing your shoulder. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have removed the gloves. That was too risky." Taehyun mumbled as he hesitated to hold your hand.
That same afternoon, he called your friend over. He introduced himself and explained the situation. He let your friend take you home as he bid you two goodbye. You're lucky it was Friday at that time so you don't have to worry about waking up the next morning to go to your dance class. For the next two days, you spent it caving in your room. It helped you calm down.
Monday. You opened the door. You laughed at the scene in front of your eyes.
"What's that?" You chuckled as you placed your bag on the corner. Taehyun looks at himself in the mirror. He's totally covered. He's wearing a thicker glove and a padded jacket. His usual dress pants are now sweats. He's even wearing a mask. He scratched the back of his head.
"Pft. That's too much. Don't worry I'm fine now. Thank you by the way." You smiled at him.
"Are you sure? Because that scared me. I don't know what to do." He removed his jacket along with the face mask and the thick gloves.
"Mhm, I'm sure." You assured him.
"Okay then. We'll try again. Slowly this time." His eyes are full of concern as he looks at you. You smiled at him as you accepted his hand.
For another month, Taehyun tried to connect with you. Stopping whenever needed. Wearing the things he needs to wear whenever he can sense your anxiety rising. For once, you realize how he gently holds you. How he's always careful with you, treating you like a fragile glass that would easily break if you weren't handled correctly. One month passed without much problem. If anything, you're actually growing accustomed to it.
For some reason, you learned to feel comfortable with Taehyun's touch. The graze of his skin, his fingers, and his touch never terrified you anymore, and his existence no longer made you panic.
Now, he's solely the reason why you're still attending your dance class. You're slowly putting your trust in him. You're slowly putting your walls down. He can now hold your hand without fear. He can now dance without thinking that you would startled. He slowly introduced you to the steps that requires your body to be closer. Teaching you how the steps are supposed to be done. You're no longer panicking. Even when your face is just only few inches from him, you were actually smiling at each other. You no longer feared his touch. If anything, he's only leaving you all tingly with his warm skin.
You could feel the warmth radiating off his body. Whenever you leaned on his chest, it made your heart flutter. His breath on your shoulder, your neck, any part of your body makes the knot in your stomach twist tighter.
You're slowly craving for his touch. For how he cares for you, for how he tends to you. Whenever you're home, he keeps popping into your head. How his sharky smile appears whenever he's happy. The small noises he made. His cat-like attitude. He's the perfect example of hot, sexy and cute.
Every last week of the month, you would have all the time to yourselves to gather all your skills acquired. Because every once a month, you had to show what you have learnt in class. This now left the two of you alone in the dance studio. Perfecting every step and move you needed to show on evaluation day.
Taehyun's lingering touches left you all tingly. His deep voice sent a shiver down your spine. His breath alone makes your mind go in a twist.
"One step back, two steps to the front... One turn and... Lean you down." He's matching his words on every beat of the step. You thought it only happens in a fantasy world. But it was like the world stopped when his eyes were fixed on yours. His steady breath makes you hold yours. His eyes traveled down to your lips as he gulped. He mumbles a soft "You're pretty," before pulling you back to stand on both your feet.
His hands are both on your face as he slowly backs you to the mirror. His breath is unsteady and warm. The moment he got you pressed on the mirror, he leaned his forehead on yours as he closed his eyes.
"You're really pretty. So pretty I'm afraid I can't control myself." He whispered. Your hands were on his chest, you felt how his heart was thumping so hard.
"S-should we head out early?" You whispered, your hot puffs of breath touching his lips got him reeling as he cursed under his breath.
He quickly pulls away, holds your hand and grabs both of your bags. Both heading outside to his car. "Tell your friend I'm taking you home instead." The air in the car throughout the drive was so thick. His hands were gripping on the wheels, tapping impatiently when the road slowed down.
"Calm down, Tae, I'm not going anywhere." You chuckled as you placed your hand above his when it was resting on the gear shift. He throws a quick glance at you. He bit his lip as a flush crept up on his cheeks.
The drive was short, but Taehyun's action made it look like it was not. He hurriedly got out of his car, running over to your side to open the door for you as he held your hand. His jittery steps were heavy as you both made your way to his humble home.
"Come in." He nervously spoke as he placed his shoe on the rack, switching the light on in the process.
"D-do you want a drink or something?" He was almost running towards the kitchen.
You flop on his couch, making yourself comfortable at some point. "Come here, instead," you chuckled, "You're so anxious for no reason, Taehyun." He sat down beside you, wiping his sweaty palms on his dress pants as he sighed. You scoot over, holding his face, lips just a few inches apart.
"Wait," he pushed you a bit, "a-are you sure about this?" You nodded and smiled at him. "G-give me a minute." He rummaged through his back pocket pulling a handkerchief. You looked at him confused.
He unfolded the handkerchief and gently placed the thin fabric on your lips before crashing his lips on yours. He holds your nape as he climbs up on the couch. He slowly laid you down. Lips unmoving, yet it feels so hot. His lips were just merely pressed on yours with the fabric separating both of your soft skin.
He pulled away, kissing your forehead. "I'm sorry." He whispered as if he was the one who did you wrong. You gently pull the handkerchief away as you tangle your fingers in his hair. Taehyun never failed to take care of you in the most gentle way possible. He's not thinking of his pleasure at this point. He's thinking about you. To the point that he even thought of putting a piece of cloth between your lips just to be able to kiss you.
You wanted to cry at how he's taking care of you. Your eyes welled up with tears as you pulled him back. "I'm good now Tae, thank you for taking care of me. There's no need for the hanky." You whispered before your tears rolled down your cheeks as you kissed him, bare.
He's a gentleman. He's too good to be true. But you let your walls fall down and let him enter. You let him protect you instead. But his hungry kiss spoke thousands of emotions. His kisses travel down to your neck.
"Taehyun..." You whimpered as you gripped his hair.
"A bit more... Just a bit more..." He started sucking and biting your neck and shoulder, leaving splotchy red marks. He pulls away for a while, enough time to tug your shirt off your body.
His fingers slowly traced every scar you have on your body. The marks on your chest from the bottle Han once threw at you. The cigarette burns on your stomach. He also pulled down your skirts only to see stitches from your thighs. You got this when Han pushed you down the stairs. His finger draws back to your lips. The scar from the cut when he slapped you is still visible.
You covered your face out of embarrassment. You no longer look pretty with your all bruised-up body. "We can't do this here." Taehyun got up and carried you all the way to his bedroom. He laid you carefully as ever in his bedroom.
The bed dips down at his weight as he kneels between your legs. His head dips down to kiss every scar you have on your delicate body as if he's kissing your trauma away. He took his precious time. Not wanting to scare or startle you at any point. His actions are being done with all tenderness.
"Do you still want me to continue?" He asks when he hovers above your body, his elbows on both sides of your head. "I want you Taehyun, please do..." You whined biting your lip. "How can I say no when you say it like that, sweetheart." He sighed leaning his forehead on yours again. Your arms crawled under his shirt, feeling his toned body hiding beneath the soft cotton shirt he was wearing. "C-can you take it off? I feel so exposed." You mumbled as you tugged his shirt. "Ah, shit, I'm sorry." He quickly backed up to discard his shirt on the floor.
You stared at him when he was all fours above you. His body is totally toned. You can clearly see the firm muscles on his arms. His buff chest and his perfectly defined abs. "Touch me. I won't stop you. Touch me so you won't feel embarrassed anymore. Touch me so you won't feel as if I'm taking advantage of you. Touch me so you won't feel scared." He grabbed one of your hands and placed it on his chest, slowly dragging it down to his abs.
When he lets go of your hands, you continue to drag them down to the waistband of his dress pants. "C-continue..." His eyes were shut close, his lips trapped between his teeth. You can clearly see his abs tightening as he clenches with the graze of your finger on his waist. He gulps when you hook your finger inside. You unhooked the clip that's binding his pants and pulled the zipper down. His breathing hitched at the lingering touches you're leaving on his lower body.
You gently stroked him as you looked for his eyes. His lips were swollen at how he was biting it. "You won't let it out?" You tried taunting him. "Fuck..." He lets go of his long-held breath, hissing through his teeth. "Y-you're making me crazy, sweetheart... You're totally making me crazy..." He huffed as he tucked your hair behind your ear.
"Condom?" You asked. He reached into the small drawer just beside your head, pulling out a packet of condoms. "D'you wanna p-put it in f'me?" His words were short, and he was catching his breath. You gently rubbed the head of his cock as you rip the packet with your teeth.
"S-sweetheart, you're... Shit... You're k-killing me." He shuddered when you pressed at his slit, his jaw clenched tightly, his hand grasping the sheets.
You slowly drag your fingers on his cock as you wrapped it with the condom. "T-take your time... I w-won't do anything to hurt you or...ahh... or m-make you s-scared of me." He's struggling to hold back but he's doing his best. As soon as you were done, you tangled your fingers on his again, pulling him for a kiss. A kiss full of care. Gentle. Delicate. Sweet.
He pulls away, caressing your face once more. He pulls your underwear in one swift motion as he lines himself up on you, slowly pushing in. He continuously soothes you by rubbing his thumb on your cheek. "Don't be scared, hm? I'm here. It's just me..." He keeps on mumbling, repeating the same phrase as you nod back at him.
Once he has bottomed out inside you, he stays still as he continues to plant soft kisses on your face. You were tearing up not because of the trauma anymore, but because of the love and care he's showing you.
He unhooked your bra as he gently groped your breast, his fingers flicked on your nipple as he suck on the other. "Mmm..." You whimpered underneath his big body squirming at how his tongue danced on your nipple. He didn't take long, afraid that he might hurt or trigger your trauma.
"C-can I move now? I might end up c-cumming now. You've been clenching f-for some time..." He muttered under his breath. You nodded and covered your face again.
He pulled both of your hands and intertwined your fingers with him above your head. "Please don't cover your face. You're beautiful. You're still pretty even with your scars. You're still gorgeous even with your fear and trauma. Please... Just let me take care of you. I know it'll be hard for you, but I promise. I promise to hold you dearly and cherish you." His eyes were looking for answers.
"Taehyun... Please... Please take care of me from now on. Please hold me when I feel scared... Make me feel loved..." Your silent weeps were drowned as he kissed your nose. "I'll be your peace, sweetheart." He wiped your tears as he slowly thrusts in you.
"I... I promise to hold you as gently as I can... But... I think I might end up g-going hard right n-now." He buried his face in the crook of your neck.
Your arms reached over his back as your nails dug and dragged over his bare back. "T-Taehyun..." You moaned out his name as you writhed in pleasure beneath him. The slow thrust becomes a little bit more sloppy. The skin slapping echoed through the solitude of his room.
"Fuck. Please forgive me if e-end up going t-too hard. But I promise to d-do my best to hold b-back." He grunted as his thrust went harder. You shook your head wanting him to go harder.
"I-i can't hurt you... I w-won't..." He steadies the way he thrusts inside you making the knot on your stomach tighten as you feel your high just around the corner.
You held him as if your life depended on him, "Taehyun... I'm close." "D-do it, sweetheart. I'm g-gonna cum any m-minute." He pressed his lips on you to drown your moans as you both came. He rubbed your waist as he soothed you before pulling out. Tying the condom and disposing it in the bin, zipping up his pants at the same time.
He bends down to kiss your forehead as he grabs a pack of wet wipes cleaning you up. He picked up his shirt and made you wear it. He finally laid beside you as he pulled you on his chest, running his fingers through your hair.
"Are you hurt anywhere?" He checks on you, to which you replied by shaking your head and a smile. "Sorry for going too hard, I did my best to hold back," he mumbled as he kissed the top of your head. "I'm okay Taehyun. Thank you so much." Your eyes finally close as his warmth embraces you. He hums while still hugging you close to him.
"Please rest now, sweetheart. When you wake up, you no longer have to suffer anymore. You're safe with me. You're finally safe with me."
@binniesbooks 2024
119 notes Ā· View notes
avocado-writing Ā· 10 months ago
Note
I love love love your bg3 writing so much. I'm so glad i found your blog.
if you're comfortable writing about marriage, could you write the companions (minus lae'zel) reactions to a githyanki Tav proposing? like, Tav has done research into material plane customs and what marriage entails and has decided they want that with their love.
thank you if you do!! ā™”ā™”ā™”
Tumblr media
Astarion
A little baffled when he sees you get down to one knee so sincerely, thinking you canā€™t possibly be about to propose. Thatā€™s not a thing githyanki do is it? Gods, he should have asked Laeā€™zelā€¦
Eyes widen when you produce the ring. Dead heart skips.
Is utterly bowled over that this is happening. That anyone would think he was worth proposing to, especially wonderful you.
You start a spiel about why you think youā€™d be a spouse he should consider, usual githyanki directness, and he cuts you off - ā€œyou donā€™t need to convince me, my sweet. The answer is yes. Itā€™s always yes.ā€
You slide a ring onto his finger and he watches the way it sparkles.
You must have saved up for ages. He never thought heā€™d be deserving of something like this, but is going to try and see himself through your eyes from now on.
Gale
As you drop to a knee, heā€™s sorting through every piece of information in his head that he knows about githyanki, because you canā€™t possibly be about to ā€”
Just stares for a moment when you bring out a ring. He sees your brow furrow.
ā€œyou are displeased.ā€ Him, quickly, ā€œno, no! Far from it! Iā€™m justā€¦ surprised.ā€
ā€why would you be surprised, Gale? You are the most treasured thing in my life, and I believe this is how people in FaerĆ»n seal that bond.ā€
Heā€™s reduced to speechlessness at your sincerity. All he can do is nod and put on the ring, allowing you to scoop him up in your arms and kiss him over and over ā¤ļø
Karlach
The second you drop to a knee she says yes.
ā€œKarlach I believe I am meant to ask the question firstā€”ā€ ā€œsorry, I got overexcited! do it properly then.ā€
ā€ā€¦ will you marry mā€”ā€œ ā€œYESā€
She grabs you and pulls you into her embrace, holding you in a bridal carry and kissing you deeply.
ā€œWould you like to see the ring?ā€ ā€œThereā€™s a ring too?!ā€
Sheā€™s so happy, man. Youā€™re certain youā€™ve never made a better decision in your life.
ā€œI researched into what gem would be preferred in a ring, and measured your gloves to get the size correct.ā€ ā€œYou did all this for me? šŸ„¹ā€ ā€œKarlach, you are worth moving the stars for.ā€
She goes around the camp showing off her ring. She canā€™t stop smiling all day ā¤ļø
Shadowheart
Raised eyebrows when you kneel.
ā€œHmm, I wasnā€™t aware that githyanki knew of marriage.ā€ ā€œI didnā€™t. I read up about it. But I suppose if youā€™re against itā€”ā€œ ā€œno no, I didnt say thatā€¦ā€
Smiles when you drop to a knee again, pretends to be coy in her answer, but she knows sheā€™d never say anything but yes.
You lay there with her that evening as she discusses all of the intricacies of planning a wedding, her hand tangled in yours, going into great detail about what she wants. Her face hurts by the time she falls asleep because sheā€™s been grinning all day.
Wyll
He is so utterly surprised when you propose ā€” but not for any untoward reason.
ā€œWait right there!ā€ his face is so excited when he runs back into his tent, and when he re-emerges he has a ring box in his hand too.
ā€œohā€¦ is it custom for us both to have a ring when proposing?ā€ ā€œNo, my darling. Itā€™s just fortuitous luck that I was going to propose to you, too.ā€
ā€œI see. So is your answer yes, then?ā€ ā€œOf course my love. A thousand times.ā€
You smile widely, and the two of you exchange rings, before he reaches over and kisses you sweetly.
Halsin
Is happy, but also wants you to know you donā€™t have to do this. That proposal might be a custom of this plane but if you arenā€™t certain, it isnā€™t something you have to do.
ā€œI want this, Halsin. I have done my research thoroughly. I can think of nothing more joyous than being married to you. I do not enter into the lightly, and Iā€™ve never been more sure of anything in my life.ā€
He smiles so widely it threatens to crack his face in two. Lifts you in his arms and gives you a passionate kiss, assuring you that he will make you happy for the rest of his days.
Canā€™t stop looking at the ring on his finger. Heā€™s an old elf, but heā€™s never felt more treasured in his life.
Minthara
Smirks. She knew this was coming.
Doesnā€™t say much, but confirms ā€œyou made the right choice. Yes. I will marry you.ā€
She scrutinises the ring as you slide it on your finger, but seems content. She keeps glancing down to how it reflects the light.
Proves just how pleased she is later that night in bed šŸ˜
230 notes Ā· View notes
liyawritesss Ā· 6 months ago
Text
į“‹į“Ź€Ź€į“€ į“”/ į“€ źœ±į“˜ÉŖŹ€ÉŖį“›-Ź™į“‡É“į“…ÉŖÉ“É¢ źœ±/į“
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
-> synopsis: you're a bender who's dedicated your life to the art of spirit-bending. along the way, you've seem to have caught the eye of a certain avatar.
-> pairing: avatar korra + black!gn!reader
-> contains: pure fluff, 2nd person ('you', 'your', 'yours')
-> a/n: my very mild (not mild at all I am feral atm) obsession with korra has a returned and so you all will now feel the brunt of it lmao. also, semi-new format for the posts? what do we think?
-> join my taglist!
-> tags: @badass-dora-milaje @uranometrias @lees-chaotic-brain @jacuzziwaters
Tumblr media
ā€¢ Morning meditations become a thing, and this is huge because Korra isn't a morning person. If she could, she'd sleep well into the afternoon, but being an all powerful spiritual being that deals with the world's political and humanitarian problems doesn't let you sleep in as often as you'd think. So it's begrudgingly that she adopts an early rise schedule. But upon meeting you, she sees the far earlier morning rises as a way to spend as much time with you as possible, so she cherishes them greatly and learns to love waking up before dawn and heading out to the rooftops to be greeted by the sunrise.
ā€¢ Does little things she knows that you know aren't like her to do because she wants your special attention. This is usually during training and will consist of her purposefully messing up her form or messing up in the middle of spirit bending (in the beginning this was less of a joke and more of a reality, but as she got better at it, she'd casually play as if she didnt know what she was doing) . Korra will always have this cocky little smirk on her face when you come over to help her, and all you can do is roll your eyes and do your due diligence to the Avatar.
ā€¢ Korra loves your voice and will do anything to keep you talking. Will ask you history questions about origins of spirit bending or even asks you about theories and hypotheticals to hear you speak passionately on it. On the flip side, she's ironically helpful when it comes to research papers and articles you'd write about Spirit Bending. She doesn't try to distract you but ultimately helps test out your theories and their credibility.
ā€¢ While protective of you and the dangers that could be faced with accompanying the Avatar, she wants you to come with her on her excursions. You're a valuable asset to the team with your spirit bending, knowing much more than she herself does, and it helps to have an extra set of hands on the job. There's also the added perk of you being a source of comfort for her that she never knew she needed until meeting you.
ā€¢ Upon being part of the Avatar Krew, a lot of public appearances come with you being at her side as a sort of consultant. With the new age of human-spirit interaction, Korra believes that now, more than ever, the people need more examples of how to handle themselves and how to interact with beings they've only ever heard stories of. Even she admits that your calming presence and knowledge about the spirits as well as how to commune with them has gotten her out of a couple of publicity jams.
ā€¢ You have matching charm bracelets that glow whenever one of you is spirit-bending, or just bending in general! When she had them carved Korra had no clue that the wooden beads would ever be able to do that, but upon seeing it the first time the two of you spirit bended an agitated dark spirit together, it gave her a revelation of just how deeply bonded the two of you had become during her journey and trials as the Avatar.
ā€¢ Sleeping together is absolute heaven. After a long day there's nothing either of you want more than to rest in each other's arms. She feels the most comfortable and safe in your shared bed with you next to her, watching over her during the night. After engaging in your wind down routine, which usually either consists of you reading a book and her listening to the pro-bending match on the radio, or both of you talking about your day, snuggling up together under the soft sheets helps you two slip away into sleep in mere seconds.
ā€¢ With her nightmares, they can sometimes get extreme, and when they do, she may slip into the Avatar State as a defense mechanism. She never feels it herself and at first didn't believe you when you mentioned to her the one time you really caught it; which was when she was sleep on her front with her shirt off one hot summer night and the outline of Rava appeared for a split second, before fading away as you attempted to wake her up. Though around the times of year when those traumatic instances happened, Korra could feel that she was a little tense and her spirit harbored some unease.
ā€¢ Though not much could be done about those memories and those nightmares, there are times where you feel Korra slip away to meditate to calm her mind. Some times she will break her meditation to see that you've joined her, either with a book to keep yourself entertained and to watch her, or on a blanket next to her in a state of half-sleep.
Tumblr media
If you enjoyed, please leave a like, comment, and reblog for others to see! And donā€™t be shy to send in a request!
102 notes Ā· View notes
drivestraight Ā· 2 months ago
Note
hi!!!!
so, obviously im here to talk about eat them alive cause i genuinely havenā€™t been this insane about a fic since all to play for was published. I decided to read it yesterday night as a lil treat because I love your writing, even though I was very much weary of the landoscar tag (i unfortunately do not get the hype, but ill try anything once šŸ¤·šŸ¼ā€ā™€ļø). WELL. little did I know that the landoscar tag would be the LEAST of my worries.
im a firm believer that oscar piastri is, in fact, just as batshit crazy as any of them and boy did you do that justice!!! the oscar pov? Sensational, literally everything I wanted AND more: I often feel like in fics people get tricked by his personality and tend to make him very flat, gray and boring, but you wrote him exactly how I wanted to see him. A very calculating person who also feels things deeply, ruthless to the point of almost being cruel, but never robotic or cold.
now, I donā€™t particularly care for Lando irl. he just doesnā€™t do it for me but MANā€¦ā€¦..the absolute lando torturefest this fic was made me ACHE. the fact that he just couldnā€™t make himself stop from falling for oscar despite still being INSANELY bitter about the whole abu dhabi situation and his consequent lost championship. the way he just kept IGNORING every kind of hint that the thing with oscar was going to end in tragedy for him!!!!!!! (maxf made me insane. him being right about oscar from the get to and yet still having to watch as the mother of all psychological tortures unfolded cause lando was a goner. OUGH)
Maxā€¦ā€¦oh Max. I love how you can just tell heā€™s your favourite from the way you write him (this is a compliment, not at all some kind of dig btw). Heā€™s always the catalyst, willing or not, and somehow his presence just trickles down into every other characterā€™s story. Haunting The Narrative personified. Oscar taking his place in rbr just to go apeshit and be compared to mad max. Max playing involuntary mind games on lando with his team radio, triggering the most INSANE lando meltdown ever. I was PRAYING for a maxcar happy ending and you gave it to me!!!!!
Now, a list of moments where I had to put my phone down and stare at the wall for a minute:
- oscar not giving position back in Abu Dhabi. Did I see it coming? Yes. Did it make me gasp in shock either way? Also yes.
- the whole entirety of the landoscar portion of this story. the fact that the tenderness between them was built on NOT acknowledging all the terrible things they were doing to each other in the car. the fact that they just wanted to be sweet and loving and caring but couldnā€™t fight against the Big Bad Championship Issue and weā€™re doomed from the start.
- Oscar trying to work up the courage to tell lando he was gonna leave mclaren for redbull and lando being like. Hey, donā€™t worry, I know. I do too. I WAS GOING INSANE HERE. what if I loved you and you were about to betray me.
- the whole golf scene between zak and oscar. the way my heart dropped when I realised zak wanted to push lando out of the team, their golden boy from the start, cause he just didnā€™t think he had that dog in him and that he would get chewed up and spit out by oscar in a matter of years. OSCAR ACCEPTING RBRā€™S OFFER AS THE ULTIMATE ACT OF LOVE TOWARDS LANDO.
- somehow it didnt click in my head right away what Alex going to mclaren meant. AND THEN. carlos, OH RIGHT CARLOS. him defending against lando cause he thought Lando knew, him being stuck in williams despite the whole carlando narrative and the fact that he was, allegedly, such a big part in the development of mclaren. what the hell
- the scene between oscar and lando. You know the one. Oscar being like: you are too emotional thatā€™s why nobody told you I was leaving!!!!!! and lando responding with: no I am not!!!!!!! with tears in his eyes. SENSATIONAL. ā€œItā€™s not my fault you made up this whole fantasy in your head that we were together, and we were in love.ā€ right. Okay. šŸ‘šŸ¼ im so fine about this actually.
- retired max and seb in rbrā€™s garage made me bawl for some reason. maybe itā€™s me being a seb fucker, but the mental image of the two rbrā€™a golden boys together is terrible in the best way.
- the scene between daniel, max and oscar. HUH. I loved all the hints at the absolute nuclear bomb that was maxiel but without making the story about it, chefs kiss (thatā€™s exactly what maxiel is all about imo! the what ifā€™s and the heartache and the wrong timing of it all. maxiel IS not about fulfilment and happiness baby)
Honourable mention: charles being oblivious to the chaos and having an identity crisis trying to muster up the courage to buy lube. delicious
To wrap this infinite rant up, I just wanted to tell you that you truly do have a special talent in writing and youā€™re probably the only author whose fics I will always read, despite pairings or plot lines. This fic in particular was VERY well-crafted and I compliment both you and lia for it; your minds work in ways that align very well with my taste, and thank god for that tbh! Hope you have a great day and just know that Iā€™ll be thinking about this fic for a very long time. šŸ«¶šŸ»šŸ«¶šŸ»šŸ«¶šŸ»šŸ«¶šŸ»šŸ«¶šŸ»šŸ«¶šŸ»
uno reverse - an infinite response below the cut ā¤ļø
in a way, this might be the closest thing i get to a fic commentary, so thank you for the detailed ask:
the variety of people who came into this For the landoscar tag vs those who were hesitant about the landoscar tag... what a beautiful collection of people...
re: oscar pov, thank you so much! one thing i really love about oscar is like. how much he pushes back IRL about how people view him as unemotional except. literally everyone around him, mark, andrea, and even his mom are like - yeah oscar's so unflappable and calm at all times. whereas to oscar he's time and time again been like. i do get emotional i just don't show it, etc. so i'm happy that you liked this characterization of him :) calculating but feels things deeply, ruthless for a purpose, casually cruel but only in pursuit of some greater goal, but not robotic or cold. yeah !!!!
even though maybe this fic might've tricked some people... don't get me wrong... i'm a massive landolover... no1 landolover on the planet... aka i love putting him through situations... and yeah. he fell hard for oscar. So So Hard. he fell and he fell hard and Max (f) saw it and was like. i can't fucking sit and watch you break your own heart. i can't do it. i can't watch you do it. and lando knew all that and knew better but still, he took the risk and it blew up in his face. for me lando in this fic was the most human because it's like. the only reason why maxcar got each other so well/worked so well is because they were so willing to sacrifice everything else in their lives, and other people, for what they wanted, without any sort of contrition. that sort of singleminded abandon/focus/dedication to one thing, racing etc., is just, like - this isn't to say that the other drivers don't have that same want or dedication, but the really interesting point i was trying to get across was - how much are you really willing to sacrifice. how much are you willing to give up, what other parts of your life are you willing to be flippant about. you can't put all of your care and effort into one thing without forsaking some other parts. for oscar, the parts he was letting go of/giving up was lando, etc.
and yeah it was like. lando saw all the signs in monza, zandvoort, etc. but he just - ignored it. when you have these little hints that don't fit into your worldview, it's easy to ignore how they fit into the puzzle, it's hard to see things you're not looking for even if they're right under your nose. besides, oscar had a contract. besides, to lando, oscar loved him. and even if oscar did love him, which he did, it just wasn't in a way that lando could understand.
and yeah... the max f of it all... he was right about it from the start. he knew how the story would end and he was right in the end, but no matter how much you care and no matter how much you know, you can't really control how other people act. he told lando again and again that oscar would fuck him over in the end. [not in the fic... just in my mind... and also in my notes lmao]. and lando ignoring everything he said re: the fights/fall outs between them, is what led max to be like - yeah, fuck this. i'm not watching you break your own heart. [but then he goes and picks up the pieces post-zandvoort, obviously... the nortrell of it all...]
to finish off the triangulation - max! he really is my favorite <3 it comes out in everything i write ls;jdflksajdf he really was the catalyst for this whole fic like. so much of what happened between landoscar, in a way, was kind of a direct consequence of max, even in the smallest ways. he retired, so oscar left mclaren. he told the media in zandvoort, so we got that terrible fallout. he might not have been the main character in the real story, but he was a catalyst. he haunted the narrative. even retired, in 2026, everyone still thinks about him, everyone still talks about him re: sky sports commentators. but in the end, he was really just - this guy who's retired, with his cats in monaco, playing iracing and minecraft on stream, and fucking oscar in between, etc. something about maxcar who just - are untouchable only because of their perceived lack of care, when truly, they are both people who deeply, deeply care - but only about certain things. only about the things that matter.
re: oscar not giving the place back. One of the very first plot points of the fic. very lovely and special to me. an eye for an eye. but not something malicious, not something done out of revenge. just - this is how it's going to be, so i'll return it in full measure. it wasn't that deep. really, oscar just did it for himself
re: landoscar. yeah... it was the not talking about things. it was the fact that they were able to be happy and in love only during the summer break, when nothing else mattered. but in the end it always comes back to the racing...
re: WHAT IF I LOVED YOU AND YOU WERE ABOUT TO BETRAY ME... EXACTLY... lando was. so sure. that oscar was going to say i love you then.... he was so sure...
re: the golf scene. YEAHHHH. this was a really fun moment for me. it was why it was necessary for lando to not be doing so well before the summer break. yes he already lost a championship (2024), but it needed to be convincing, at least results wise, that zak would want to drop him. it's that sort of ruthless attitude, i feel like, where you hedge your bets and try to pick the right horse given the information you have. the point i was trying to make was that people started to see a future with oscar more than they did with lando. oscar just kept on driving - and he did well for it. but zak scared oscar off.
in the end, the thing was that oscar did care deeply about lando, enough that he'd leave the team. i think it was in part oscar leaving bc he knew that mclaren would never be His team/he wanted to make a team for himself, but it was primarily for lando's sake. in that moment, in summer 2025, he did it for lando. he wouldn't take that away from lando. he already took a championship from him - which he didn't feel sorry about, but he knew that that was what he did. and he was aware that he would probably break lando's heart. he was aware of all of this, but he knew that leaving was the only way out, and he needed an out. even worse than leaving, to oscar, was staying at mclaren and having them push lando out. someone has to leave first. this is a very old story. there is no other version of the story, etc.
re: carlos. yeah RIP carlos. anyway i've been asked about why alex. and really it was just like - oscar left because he knew there couldnt be 2 number one drivers at mclaren, so i needed a convincing no2, who was still pretty solid.
re: qatar. yeah... yeah... i was literally writing like. all of this fic. all of the 50k before it, to get to qatar (maybe an exaggeration because of course there were big moments before it that i was ultra jazzed about writing, re: silverstone, re: zandvoort, re: spa, but qatar was like, the BREAKING POINT, where all the emotions come out, finally, where it's the point of no return for oscar - where everything he'd been keeping inside, all of the reactionary emotions from people's vitriol over the course of 2 seasons, and being pushed over the edge by lando saying that if he won, it wouldn't be his, bringing the whole tabloid narrative of him being mark's revenge into play - where it all comes out, and oscar can't take any of it back).
and the fantasies. yeah. oscar saying that it was all a fantasy when. deep inside. he was also making one up in his head too, is the thing.
re: max and seb <3 red bull golden boys forever.
re: maxiel. yeah man. i feel like. idk. i feel like in the context of max and red bull, daniel will always be a part of it, and i'm glad you thought that despite (or because of) the scarcity of maxiel, the emotional impact was still significant. what ifs, heartache, and wrong timing. you get it.
re: charles. bro was just doing his own thing for all of 2025-2026. the charles side story is so funny to me. Maybe one day i'll write it in length. oscar literally was just like. idgaf abt ur crisis rn.
LASTLY - thank you so much! it's always a really big honor to me to hear that a lot of people read my fics even if it's not their preferred ship, and that they'll trust me to deliver a good story, and i'm really happy that people liked this one so much!
and ofc. Lia helped develop like the majority of this plot with me. this fic is just as much hers as it is mine. our neural link is like this šŸ¤ž
TO WRAP UP. im so happy you enjoyed the fic, and thank you so much for the kind ask <3
40 notes Ā· View notes
kindaasrikal Ā· 6 months ago
Text
I FINISHED MY ZANE DRAWING
Tumblr media
He was originally not gonna have pants cause i didnt find it weird since he is still a metal man, but then i realised others might take it a bit weirdly so i had to quickly add pants šŸ˜­
ANYWAYS BACKGROUND:
Zane is known to sacrifice himself for those he cares about, and it shows how deeply protective he is of his team/family. In an AU, if that protectiveness got a bit too strongā€¦mixed a bit too much with his careā€¦he becomes secretly obsessive. He stalks the ninja when away from him and is constantly keeping tabs on them, his relationship with them is similar to canon, but he always makes sure to know where they are and their health. None of the ninja, including Pixal and Wu, have any idea of this going on, and they never will.
He watched over the ninja (plus Pixal and Wu) in a little area in his room, and watches memories and current events theyā€™re going through daily. His love for them all is platonic (romantic for Pixal), and as much as he is aware that watching-stalking- his family is not normal nor okay, he does it since he only ever ensures he knows what they are doing at all times, and that isnā€™t too bad, right?
(Wrong, its still bad, Zane just worried and cares too much to bring himself to stop)
In this AU, if his team were to find out, i feel like theyā€™d be concerned but accepting. Like bro itā€™s ZANE, they trust him more than anyone. They put limits to it and rules, but other than that they let him keep doing it. In fact, this allows them to freely do the possibly stalker-ish activities they do freely.
Kai says that sometimes he tracks or follows then when heā€™s worried.
Nya bugged everyoneā€™s gi with recording and tracking devices. She listens to conversations sometimes if shes suspicious (read: worried).
Jay has books on all of the ninja, and the notes are deeply personal and downright creepy.
Cole hunts down everyone one of team mates mightā€™ve met or known, acts like he accidentally bumped into them, and slowly weeds information out of them related to them as a person and their intentions. If theyā€™re a close friend to his teammate/s, he gets information out about their interactions of conversations.
Lloyd follows everyone. Whilst Kai probably jumps from buildings, and leaves after knowing itā€™s ok (most of the time), Lloyd follows on ground with a disguise. He learns the others interests and picks then up himself to bond with them, not realising that picking up the exact same comic jay just touched and hugging it whilst thinking Jay would love him if he got this and read it is kinda creepy.
Pixal bugs all of their tech, she knows every location, every conversation, and has many recordings. She never checks them though. What she does do is read their conversations through text, she likes gathering information about the ones she loves, and likes the drama that pops up sometimes.
Wu is normal, heā€™s like an overbearing dad who just interrogates his team with gentle words and they spill. Either that or he already knows, by guessing.
And because i need to add Morro to everything, Wu is overbearing because of not knowing everything Morro does because if he did he mightā€™ve been able to prevent what happens.
And when Morro was younger, he used to hide behind corners and watch people, never letting them know heā€™s there. He never followed them, but if heā€™s already there and he sees you, heā€™s watching you in a corner until either has to leave or you do.
But thats child Morro, ghost (cursed realm) Morro pulls a Zane and watches people, so does Garmadon in the departed realm.
BUT RESURRECTED MORRO?
Yeah, heā€™s the only normal one. After everything he just became tame and couldnā€™t care anymore. He was a bit freaked out when Lloyd comes up to him two weeks later and says ā€œyou rlly like reading about horror stories, right?ā€ Because they both have been avoiding each other and only had five normal conversations, and not a single one was casual, so how the heck did Lloyd know that.
Anyways that was fun :>
90 notes Ā· View notes
bulbabutt Ā· 9 days ago
Note
Thank you for being a bastion of sanity amidst the growing "but proshippers! But incest! But RPF!" purity culture's nonsense.
I'm so tired of being afraid to admit that I've even read a fanfic/fancomic because that same person might have a DIFFERENT ACCOUNT where they indulge in a problematic ship. And therefore they are "bad" and by association, I could be labeled "bad" for having looked at something completely unrelated and tossed on a block list.
It's asinine. Yet I'm too afraid to even get off anon because I know I don't have the mental fortitude to survive a potential online witch hunt.
So thank you, I wish you all the strength to keep screaming the words I cannot.
honestly youre not the first person to send me an anon about this, i just tend to feel just as afraid of responding to them as much as you are afraid of coming off anon. i think because while ill post things in vague context, it becomes another thing when someone says it out loud, yknow? but i appreciate it, knowing im not just screaming into a void where no one likes what i have to say.
i think what i will say is im not the only one who THINKS like i do, but i am just dumb enough to be loud and annoying about it. its kind of a thing where i'd never say anything specific because like... some people are so vicious and will demand blood if they get a whiff if i mention anything vaguely. the fact i have to be afraid to say 'people dont mind' for their own safety is crazy, huh?
i think that thing youre saying about being worried by association from association was the same first time i had this thought. i was reading something so good so deep something that effected me so deeply from how well it was talking about the realistic effects of incestuous abuse, and then i went to see what else the author had written and i was like. oh. theres just regular incest in here too. and that was kind of a moment of hm.. perhaps i need to think more about what really matters here. the fact i can engage with what i want and just say 'oh i see what else you do, thats not for me so i will just not engage with that'
so it hurts worse when theres the idea of someone engaging with art they like that has nothing 'weird' going on, then suddenly getting hit with screaming that that artist has a side account theyre not advertising where they make weird art that they are keeping FULLY separate from the account in question. like i do not see how that helps anybody in that situation.
then theres the generalization of it. the idea that maybe all you did was draw like. 19 yr old versions of two 15 yr olds kissing, and suddenly that gets you put on a list of people who will draw literal children in sexual situations, gets you put in that same boat without question. that shit is so cruel to me, that these things all get painted with the same brush. equally as bad, equally as deserving of being ostracized. or the idea that you get put on that list for not caring about if strangers ship things on the internet, makes you just as bad as someone who makes it. i really just hate this entire culture.
idk im... old school i guess? back in my day youd watch a shitty cartoon that had over 20 characters in it so you could smash them together in whatever ship suited you. crack ships were the bread and butter of me and my friends, shit that made no sense but in your own head. the idea of being anti... shipping at all is so... thats very weird. shipping as a thing is very much what fandom was ever made for in the first place? like. im not kidding, learn your history if you dont know that (middle age women shipping kirk and spock)
back when i was a kid i watched this tv show called kim possible, and i was a kid who didnt know shit about themselves seeing a pretty villain lady for the first time who called the main character who was a girl princess. i didnt know what to make of that, i didnt know the age difference between them i was a dumbass child, they were both drawn the same way! then im like 12 years old on the internet, i see theres a ship of the teenage girl and this like 30 yr old villain woman. do you think my 12 year old self saw the problematic nature and thought deeply about the morals of said ship? no. i was like 'holy shit i wish i was the teenage girl dating shego. why do i like this? oh god im a lesbian'
again. i was a child. what are you gonna do, go back in time and arrest my 12 year old ass for looking at pg rated fanart of women kissing on the internet? we didnt HAVE real representation yet! there was no korrasami, no rupphire, no bubbline, no lumity! shipping was the only place you could see stuff that was gay! and it being GAY would get you in more trouble than it having an age gap!
the fact is people WOULD cancel me now for that, wouldnt you?! thats where we're at. that IS a problematic ship, id be put on a blocklist in todays internet for being a child who crushed on villains. i didnt make it, i didnt create for it, i just looked at it and that would get you in trouble now!!! thats crazy.
i know thats a random tangent to go off on, but like..... hhhhh i dont know man. sometimes it seems like people want the internet to pass by broadcasting standards and practices and thats!!! bad!!! let people experiment with their weird shit as they figure themselves out, its so fucking normal. youre not a bad person for looking at things on the internet, youre not a bad person for engaging with things, youre not a bad person for being horny online! especially if you make your own fucking space for it?? a space easily blacklistable, with trigger warnings and EVERYTHING... we didnt have those when i was a kid, so some things are better, but culture is just worse.
i dunno. i just think i would not have thrived in this environment as a teenager. im glad im old and know better, but i worry about the lessons kids are learning from this. to feel ashamed, to bottle shit up, its not good for you. be kind to yourself, be kind to others. we're all working through shit in our own ways.
sorry for another long annoying post
22 notes Ā· View notes
thorn-rosed Ā· 4 months ago
Text
there's something christian / catholic in all versions of my rosekiller. i dont care what earth this is, guys. you're having a deeply complicated relationship to god.
fallenangel!evan x priest!barty
Evan was supposed to deliever a message to some random priest. it was an honour to be allowed on earth as an angel, you had to be outstanding. The message read "dont trust those who dont even acknowledge the bad", and evan didnt really think about it too hard. But when events on earth were unfolding, he realized that God had been in his way the whole time. He was the one Barty wasn't supposed to trust. Luckily, Barty didn't give a fuck and from that day on, Evan wad filled by a deep hate by God. The almighty took Evan's whole life from him and tried to take away his one safety boat too. And this was supposed to be the one millions of people trust and love? No, Evan decided to never trust him again.
Meanwhile Barty never really lost his faith. Sure, over time he became bitter towards God, and the more he got to know Evan, the more he resented the almighty. Yet he still believed in the ground principles and teachings of the bible. When he hit rockbottom, Barty prayed to God because he knew no matter what, God would take him back. He didn't know how or if the entity ever listened, but he knew that if He did, He'd be there for Barty and help him. After getting close to Evan and occasionally consuming his blood, God would be able to communicate with Barty. This was the craziest turning point in his life. Now, everytime he prayed, he'd make sure god would listen and wait for answers and help. Barty knew that this relationship wasn't the way it was supposed to, he knew he should give more into it, but at the same time, there was no way he'd actually worship God. Getting advice? sure. believing his existence? Yes. But respecting it and active support? No. From week to week, Barty lost his trust more and more, and even though he'd never give it up completely, he dishonoured his extremely catholic family by breaking all the rules and not giving a fuck about morals.
vampire!barty x scientist!evan
Evan had never been religious, God was just a concept that people made up to feel better about themselves. But when he tried to summon a demon, his intention was to ask how the true god was like, so Evan could live and believe the truth. over time, his Catholicism increased steadily, despite the horrible things he did to others, he read and studied the bible, prayed and went to church / confession once a week. Because God was real, and even if Evan would go to hell for murder and torture, he'd get into the good parts of it, because trusted gods plan. He'd probably say smth like "Obviously i killed thay guy! Last night, god told me to do so, its all part of his plan!" and if someone said that was blasphemy, Evan would answer with "I'm allowed, im catholic".
Meanwhile Barty... you would say that since he's been to hell and is hyperaware of God's existence, he's catholic or at least satanic (after all he knows satan personally and can't talk to his hell-bestie on earth anymore) but no. He doesn't pray to anyone, and he won't ever start. He says he loathes God for taking his mother away from him and forcing him to be tortured all his life... At this point Evan doesn't know who Barty even is, so the whole time he's like "????". But they figure it out at some point :) Yet, it makes him genuinely angry that Evan is becoming religious because of him. Why would the love of his life pray to the one entity that hurt him so much? God and their opposite views on him are some of their only fight points. While all Barty sees in God is a fake saviour who is lying through his teeth, Evan acknowledges His flaws, yet praises him for the good things. He doesnt care about breaking the rules - he's thankful for not being in jail and he's thankful for meeting Barty.
They both arent near perfect and neither of them has a "healthy" relationship to God, but I don't think that's possible in any universe.
Summary
Both versions of Rosekiller has one person that is more religious than the other one. While fallenangel!evan x priest!barty built on religion and wouldn't be able to exist without both of them being religious, there is no technical need for scientist!evan to become religious. vampire!barty might've showed him that hell is real, but there was no "real" reason for him to convert to Christianity, read the bible and confess. He knew that no matter what he did, he wasn't ready to change his behaviour for anything or anyone and would end up in hell anyway. I think, for him God was like a parental figure that had been missing his entire life, and before vampire!barty met him, scientist!evan knew he'd get no answer and wasn't even ready to try and become religious. But now that he could get an answer through vampire!barty, who showed him spells for contact, he felt like this was everything ever missing. A neglected child finally getting attention from the parent it needed his whole life.
Personal notes
The reason for Christianity/Catholicism being the only religion represented is because it was one I grew up with and I know the most about, also due to most of my friends being Christian. I would love to see people headcanon the skittles/marauders as other religions too, I simply didnt want to give misrepresentation.
28 notes Ā· View notes
leggo-my-aego Ā· 11 months ago
Text
SxF Theory based on ch. 93!!
This is purely based off the small interactions we have with this little old man right here and the relation he may or may not have with anya's past
Tumblr media
i think that not only was he a part of the project that Anya was a part of, i think he CREATED the foundation of the technology used to create the chimera experiments with Bond and with Anya's ability to read minds.
It would make a lot of sense as he states that one of the subjects he specializes in is Neurology, the study of the brain.
Also, his character design is very obviously supposed to look like Albert Einstein. Which is super important because Einstein developed the atomic theory that led to the development of the nuclear bomb. Ltrly the most devastating technology created in mankind. And Einstein was recorded to say that he deeply regretted even developing that theory.
So what does that have to do with this guy?
I think that Sigmund Authen theorized and developed the concept of a way to gain a higher neurological prowess. He said that he "dabbled in cultural anthropology," and a specialty in neurology, he was probably touring the world to understand the concept of the brain in different environments and the developmental aspects.
Tumblr media
It's shown in a lot of sci-fi media about "unlocking 100% of the brain" and I think Sigmund found a way to do that. He probably showed this research to higher ups with good intentions to develop the human body but of course, the people in power wanted to use this for damaging purposes. And the fact he was pretty much MIA during the war that his wife didnt even know wtf he was doing just supports the timeline. Also, him being at the *start* of the project would make it plausible on why Sigmund and Anya wouldnt recognize each other.
Tumblr media
I think Sigmund saw or found out about the inhumane experiments done in order to fulfill his theory and wanted to put a stop to it.
BUT
the head of the project (or whatever) stopped him and used his own research against him by wiping his memory of the events. Im guessing a very sketchy lobotomy that left him in the state he is in now where he forgets a LOT of what is happening most of the time. Which kinda shows how Anya can only get fragmented thoughts and very old memories when she reads his mind.
Tumblr media
I had this in the back burner but this ^^^ panel from the latest chapter pretty much solidified it for me. Especially with the parallels of regret with Einstein's atomic theory. Also him saying that makes me think he prbly remembers fragments of the project or the feeling of regret was too strong for him to regret from that moment.
Either way, I cant wait to see more chapters! It definitely looks like we're continuing this Anya-centered arc with the way things are developing!
64 notes Ā· View notes
liquidstar Ā· 1 year ago
Text
i think the real reason many of us were able to read more books and watch more shows as kids vs as adults is just because we use our brains more now. as a little kid i didnt think about the stories very deeply, especially not on a meta level. i wouldnt really analyze the subtext, form critiques about the way they depict certain topics, or take real-world implications into account. i mean, on some level im sure the ideas were there, but generally i would just sort of take the events as they came. a surface level read, often with thermian interpretations. and then id just move onto the next book/show without thinking much more about these things.
but as an adult, those things are exactly what i think about every time i engage with media. it can be very fun, and i enjoy doing so quite a bit, but it also does take more energy. you have to pay more attention and take things a bit slower sometimes, instead of just racing through it with your brain empty. you get more meaning out of it this way though, so i still see it as a net positive. its not just about "consumption" or quantity, but the quality that you personally get out of the story. the way it will impact you, and it doesnt matter what it is. art is in the eye of the beholder and all.
so at the end of the day i dont think you have to feel bad that youre not consuming as much as when you were a 7th grader with infinite free time and less developed critical analysis skills. you dont have to be in this weird race with yourself. youre probably getting more out of it now than you did back then, just because youve gotten better at said critical analysis skills, even if employing them takes more energy and time. you know how to now, so the experience overall is richer, even if its less in quantity. thats what i think
98 notes Ā· View notes
squiddy-god Ā· 5 months ago
Text
NRVWX Satan wedding alphabet
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Re upload from Terminated blog squid-god-supreme, hope you enjoy this
N-Night time (what about the wedding night? the time after the party?maybe even the more spicy wedding night activities)
Ohohohohohoh
So after the party, when he finally gets you back to the house of lamentation and your FINALLY all alone satan takes a moment to just hold you
Like wow, he almost canā€™t believe that this has finally happened
So he takes a minute to hold you, no talking, no annoying brothers barging in and ruining the moment
Just you and him, together, peaceful and sweet.
Now after all that mushy stuff is over satan is more than ready to get on with the more spicy wedding night activities
Chances are youā€™ve both done it before so you both know each others bodys but this time feelsā€¦different
This time is really special.
And so its a lot more gentle, no kinky stuff, just sweet gentle love making, nothing extreme, its intimate and vulnerable.
R- Rest of our life (do they want to spend the rest of their life with you? Do they ever want this moment to end?)
Look, heā€™s a demon, he knows that heā€™s probably going to live muchhhhh longer than you unless he can find something in a book-
However if his proposal is anything to go by, he also thinks that your soul mates, star crossed lovers that are meant to be (god i love his proposal)
So id say yes, he wants to spend as long as he can with you by his side, his precious y/n, his sweet human, his soulmate.
And if he can find a way to spend an eternity together, then of course heā€™d take it
He loves you, he wouldnā€™t have married you if he didnt, i imagine marriage is very important to demons because it isnā€™t exactly like human marriage
He loves you so much and he wants you with him forever, and even if he loses you he knows heā€™ll find you again, because your soulmates.
V-Vows! (what are your vows to each other)
His; ā€œy/n, i love you deeply, in my bones i know that i love you, it burns inside me as bright a flame as my rage, being with you is better than reading any book in the 3 relms, being able to kiss you, having you accept me, its bliss, it makes me feel hole, like im ME, because you love me, i know it sounds sappy butā€¦your my soulmate, just like in the book i want us to have a happy ending, i want us to keep writing this book together. I love you y/nā€
Yours ; ā€œsatan, i love you truly, the love i feel for you fills me with warmth and makes butterflies float in my stomach. Youā€™ve never quite been an open book, always sealed shut and locked away, but iā€™m so unbelievably glad that you opened up to me, let me read the writing you keep hidden away. I love all of you, your tears, your anger, the walks we take at night, all of you. Weā€™ve had a lot of ups and downs, a lot of missteps and fumbles, but weā€™ve always worked through them together, and I want to keep doing that, because youā€™re my soulmate, and iā€™m yours.ā€
W- Walking down!! (what do they feel when your walking down the aisle)
Joy, pride, calmness
Satan feels a serge of joy rush through him, youā€™re marrying him, youā€™re choosing to spend your life with him, how could he not be happy? Youā€™re so beautiful as you walk down, walking towards him with nothing but love, he feels happy and warm inside.
He also feels pride, you love HIM, your marrying HIM, out of all the demon, angles, and humans youā€™re walking down the aisle towards him, your his and heā€™s yours, the amount of pride he has knowing that fact sends him over the moon, your perfect to him, and knowing that your walking towards him is a massive ego boost
See you makes him feel calm, everyone has doubts, even the cool and collected satan was worried, mind flooded with what ifā€™s and imagination running wild with possibilities, but seeing you walk down the aisle towards him makes him feel calm, the worries washing away and becoming peaceful, he feels at ease and reassured seeing you.
X- Xtra! (a random hc about the wedding)
Mammon cries, mammon is legit balling his eyes out so lucifer has to shut him up
Lucifer is the one who walks you down the aisle
Everything is very subtly cat themed, little decorations on the note cards, small hints to cats, at first glance itā€™s all normal but in reality itā€™s all slightly cat themed.
42 notes Ā· View notes
spyroz Ā· 1 year ago
Text
i dont reblog those posts about how hard it is to have moralizing ocd in online spaces, even though i deeply resonate with them. ironically, i can only talk to 2 people about my ocd, because one of my obsessions is that other people will assume im using my mental health as a shield against criticism if i talk about it. therefore, if i talk about my ocd in any circumstance, my brain believes that i'm already doing something immoral
basically, most of my obsessions resolve around people assuming bad faith of me or that i'm somehow secretly an irredeemably bad person, no matter how hard i try to be good. i am a bad person if i dont reblog posts about serious topics, spend every waking moment thinking about extremely serious topics, or make any social mistakes whatsoever (which is scary because i'm also autistic). i believe that i am irredeemable if i make a small mistake, and i often think all my friends are waiting for me to make a mistake so that they can attack me, and that my life will be ruined if i fuck up. im constantly scanning all my interests (and people i know) for the tiniest imperfections (far beyond healthy amounts of criticism in your interests) out of fear that liking anything or anyone makes me a horrible person. if you dont take a side on this lgbt label discourse, then youre a bigot! im ALWAYS mentally preparing responses and apologies to totally theoretical situations of people being upset with me. i have intrusive thoughts about doing the immoral things that scare me most.
the problem is, *talking about* any of these thoughts invites people who will actually bad faith me. "if youre so worried about this stuff, then you must have something to hide! you just want to avoid accountability!" they make your obsession a reality by accusing you of the exact thing you fear most. none of these thoughts are reasonable or realistic, and i know that. i know that i'm mentally ill. i know logically that i'm as good a person as anyone else. when i actually do make a mistake, i stay level-headed and apologize, acknowledge what i did wrong, and change my behavior
but there is a large part of me that does not want to heal from my ocd, because i believe constant self-monitoring and self-critique is the only thing preventing me from becoming a horrible person
there is nothing i want more in this world than to be a good altruistic human being who is capable of growth, but spending weeks trapped in thought loops analyzing all my behaviors for the smallest signs of a mistake will not help me be a better person. it makes me a worse friend. it drains my energy so that i dont have the mental capacity to actually spend time being kind to others. i reread this post many times while writing it to make sure i didnt accidentally write 6 different slurs. but i can't figure out how to heal. what the fuck do i do about this
this is incredibly hard for me to write about. i'm fighting the urge to delete this post as you read it. i cant stress how debilitating this is for me, it is the biggest hurdle in my life and it sucks away days worth of my time and energy. i will become trapped in thought-loops THE SECOND im not kept sufficiently busy and stimulated by tv/music/my bf/being out of the house somewhere/etc. so much of my life is wasted wanting to be good, that i dont get a chance to actually live the life of a good person
i really hope this post resonates with someone. ive only met a few other people who have this particular kind of ocd, and its extremely isolating. but i want to try to heal from it, and i know the first step to healing is talking about it
186 notes Ā· View notes