#beatrice/esme

[fuckinglemoniestoflemon]

VFD Yearbook

[jeaninesfavouriteserum]

me 🤝 slipping v.f.d. into everyday conversations and praying someone understands me

[free-my-boy-grumbot]

asoue text posts (part 2 is up check the tag)

[vfdarlings]

snicketober two: sugar bowl gen

@free-my-boy-grumbot

The SBG as teens!! My apple pencil is literally taped together so digital art will be rare — good thing I prefer drawing on paper!!

[erenfox]

My Biggest What-Ifs of A Series of Unfortunate Events (Series Only)

The Night of the Opera:

1. What if Beatrice and Lemony had just taken the fucking sugar instead of the whole ass Sugar Bowl?

2. What if Olaf's father had never been shot by the poison dart?

The Bad Beginning:

1. What if Violet, Klaus and Sunny had never gone to the Briny Beach that day?

2. What if Violet and Klaus had never figured out Olaf's scheme to marry Violet irl?

The Reptile Room:

1. What if Monty's dumbass had just straight up recognised Olaf?

2. What if the Baudelaires had actually been fooled by Olaf's disguise, or had just pretended to be fooled?

The Wide Window:

1. What if Josephine hadn't been charmed away by Olaf, being still distraught about Ike and all?

2. What if the Quagmire parents had actually come down via their plane to help the Baudelaires + Josephine?

The Miserable Mill

1. What if Violet and Klaus never figured out Georgina's scheme?

2. What if Violet had never yelled 'Fire' and taken out all the workers from their trance?

The Austere Academy

1. What if Larry had never lost the book like a stupid dumbass?

2. What if the Quagmires had never been caught by Olaf?

The Ersatz Elevator

1. What if Olivia had never met Jacques?

2. What if the Baudelaires had identified Esme's true nature beforehand?

The Vile Village

1. What if the absolute fucking idiots of the village had just listened to the Baudelaires?

2. What if the Baudelaires had managed to escape with Hector and the Quagmires?

The Hostile Hospital

1. What if Esme had found the Sugar Bowl before Kit arrived?

2. What if the Snicket File had somehow gotten destroyed before either the Baudelaires or Olaf got to see it?

The Carnivorous Carnival

1. What if Olaf had identified the Baudelaires in their pretty terrible attempt of a freak outfit?

2. What if the Baudelaires had never been reunited with Olivia or watched any of the VFD Files?

The Slippery Slope

1. What if the Baudelaires had never met Quigley?

2. What if Quigley had never been separated from the Baudelaires?

The Grim Grotto

1. What if the Baudelaires had never been intercepted by Fiona?

2. What if Fernald hadn't helped the Baudelaires to escape?

The Penultimate Peril

1. What if the Baudelaires had never met Dewey?

2. What if the Sugar Bowl had been saved by someone at last?

The End

1. What if the Baudelaires had never figured out Ishmael's scheme, and had gotten successfully drugged enough to forget their past?

2. What if Olaf hadn't been a dumbass and released the Medusoid Mycelium on the island?

The Epilogue

1. What if Beatrice II had not managed to survive the returning trip?

2. What if Lemony had never received Beatrice II's letter?

(help im ✨mentally dying✨)

[beatricebidelaire]

Esme is the only one who gets it.

She's the only one understands hating Beatrice, understands revenge against Beatrice, understand the need, the desire to destroy Beatrice. Everyone else doesn't get it. The volunteers, the idiot bunch, adore her. But those on his own side haven't been smart enough to get him either.

Sure, neither Georgina nor Ernest cares for Beatrice. Then again, Georgina doesn't care about Beatrice, in the same manner that she doesn't care about most people. She does not like her, in the same way she does not like most people. She's absolutely unimpressed by her and finds her overrated, obviously - but just as she does not care for Beatrice, she does not care for spending her time hating her, either. She considers Beatrice irrelevant, and therefore while she would harm Beatrice if that's to her own benefits, she never had any strong desire of revenge. And while Ernest never liked Beatrice either and seemed to harbor some specific resentment towards her that Olaf never quite get, he does not hate her in the same way. Olaf doubts he could understand the betrayal by Beatrice.

So, there's really only Esme.

He appreciates her for that, even if he doesn't voice it. Neither of them are sentimental like that.

Still, occasionally, he gets suddenly very bitter. Sure, Esme gets it, gets what it feels like to be betrayed by Beatrice, wants revenge on Beatrice as much as he does. But what right did she have to feel those same feelings?

So Beatrice stole her sugar bowl. How is that even close to comparable with what she did to him? How could that ever come close? A stupid piece of teaset that Esme didn't even care about that much in the first place anyway. Sure, she gets him like no one else could, in this respect, but fuck her, what right did she have, how dare she thinks the two are the same, he thinks, angrily and bitterly.

No one gets it like him.

No one, he decides. Not even Esme. The only person who completely gets what he feels, the hatred in him - is probably Beatrice.

It's always been him and B.

No one else.

He hates her.

He misses her.

He's going to kill her one day. It won't be quick, it won't be soon, because he's going to take his time, because it's going to be elaborate, because he's going to make her suffer. And if anyone dare do it first and rob him of his chance, he'll kill them for that.

[essily]

its killing me because everytime i think of the prufrock prep drama department all i can see them as is the glee club

[hello-mystery]

Who's your favourite romantic ASOUE ship?

idk man i just really like Olivia x Jacques

[badlydrawndrawnings]

ASOUE Characters (The Adults)

And the Beatles Songs I Can't Help But Associate Them With

Lemony Snicket, In My Life (~All these places had their moments/With lovers and friends, I still can recall/Some are dead and some are living/In my life, I've loved them all~)

Beatrice Baudelaire, Golden Slumbers (~Golden slumbers fill your eyes/Smiles await you when you rise/Sleep pretty darling do not cry/And I will a lullaby~)

Bertrand Baudelaire, All My Loving (~All my loving, I will send to you/All my loving/Darling, I'll be true/All my loving/All my loving, Ooh/All my loving, I will send to you~)

Count Olaf, Norwegian Wood (This Bird Has Flown) (~I once had a girl/Or should I say she once had me/She showed me her room/Isn't it good Norwegian Wood?~) + (~And when I awoke I was alone/This bird had flown/So I lit a fire/Isn't it good Norwegian wood?~)

Esme Squalor, Girl, being the Girl in question, not the 'singer'* (~She's the kind of girl who puts you down/When friends are there/You feel a fool/When you say she's looking good/She acts as if it's understood~)

*The 'singer' of 'Girl' is Jerome Squalor, who has strong feelings of his former marriage with Esme, more bad than good

Jacques Snicket, While My Guitar Gentle Weeps (~I look at the world and I notice it's turning/While my guitar gently weeps/With every mistake we must surely be learning/Still my guitar gently weeps~)

Kit Snicket, Help* [~When I was younger so much younger than today/I never needed anybody's help in any way/(Now) But now these are gone (These days are gone)/I'm not so self assured/(And now I find) Now I've changed my mind/And opened up the doors~]

*Despite the upbeat tone, the lyrics really do fit Kit

Dewey Denouement, A Day in the Life (~I read the news today, oh boy/About a lucky man who made the grade/And though the news was rather sad/Well, I just had to laugh/I saw the photograph~) + (~A crowd of people stood and stared/They'd seen his face before/Nobody was really sure if he was from the House of Lords~)

Ernest Denouement, Carry That Weight (~Boy, you're gonna carry that weight/Carry that weight a long time/Boy, you're gonna carry that weight/Carry that weight a long time~)

Frank Denouement, You Never Gave Me Your Money (~You never give your money/You only give me your funny paper/And in the middle of negotiations/You break down~)

[hypersomniaaboutsleeping]

Well

[dykemaclachlan]

pov you’re bertrand driving the taxi and you have a vital decision to make

[fuckinglemoniestoflemon]

Sugar bowl generation edit

My tiktok :)

[jew-flexive]

“Why are you here?” He snaps, leaning heavily on his doorframe. There are a hundred answers to his question, each less admissible than the last.

Because Jacques told me it was necessary. Because someone told Jacques to tell me it was necessary. Because I’m the only person besides B who might turn you human. Because I’m the only person besides B who still thinks you’re human. Because you’re brilliant and mad and still so goddamn useful. Because tattoos stay permanent no matter how many fires you start. Because I think you start fires just because you know I’ll be the one to put them out. Because you’re laughably easy to lie to. Because I didn’t kill your father but I might as well have. Because you didn’t kill my brother but given half a chance you would have. Because you loved me for five years and still only hate me a little.

Because I want to be. God help me, I’m here because I want to be.

“We should talk,” is all she says, stepping past him through the door.

[It’s a year before the Baudelaire fire. Kit has always been a very useful volunteer.]

[navree]

beatrice baudelaire!

my girl!

How I feel about this character: I've always been really interested in Beatrice because of how mysterious she is. Like, as a fandom we have a lot of headcanons and stuff we've extrapolated from the books and supplementary material, but on pure canon there's a lot of gaps in what we know about her that makes her interesting, especially when it comes to fans trying to fill in those gaps. And I like that she was just this super cool and super hot woman that everyone was so incredibly obsessed with no matter what side they were on, everyone and their mother had a complex about Beatrice.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: If Daniel Handler didn't want me to become far too obsessed with Lemony and Beatrice as a couple, he shouldn't have written five hundred thousand words of Lemony going "Beatrice I love you so much let me list it all" as a way to reassure her when she asks 'hey do you still love me' in the 200 page break up book she wrote. That's just insane, of course I ship it. I'm also really into Beatrice/Bertrand as a couple too, people can have multiple great loves. And depending on my mood I can be really into the lemonberryice throuple.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Beatrice and Kit's relationship is always gonna be interesting to me, and Olaf and Beatrice just seem to have had the most fascinating dynamic, legit friends in childhood to some more vitriolic friendship and then she murders his parents and then he torments her innocent children, it's Good.

My unpopular opinion about this character: I don't know if I've got any necessarily unpopular ones because this fandom in general, and especially the bit focused on the sugarbowl generation, is very small and most of the stuff I've seen I agree with. I guess I might characterize Beatrice as a bit, idk, colder than most? For all her other facets, Olaf was someone she knew and seems to have gotten along with well on a personal level, and she still doesn't seem to have spent much time outwardly agonizing over what might have been straight cold blooded murder. I don't think she was evil or unfeeling, and there's a reason she pulled back from VFD stuff especially after having children, but there might be a more ruthless streak there in my view than in some other people's.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: idk man, that she fuckin lived? It's a bummer that she's dead, she was a devoted mother and a good friend and an important part of a lot of people's lives and it seems like a bunch of worlds were dimmer without her in them, her kids are gonna miss her for the rest of their lives and Lemony is still deeply affected by losing her literal decades after the fact. I wish she'd been able to meet little Beatrice too, I think they would have gotten along great.

[lazthecat3]

why does esmé love being "in"

ok so a tiktok got me thinking about this as they point out that not only was the sugar bowl esmé's prized possession but it was also a way to show that esmé was TRUSTED to hold it.

you maybe wondering how this relates to esmé's love for in and out (not the restaurant) well since she was most likely high in the ranks of vfd that means a lot of the ideology was instilled in her for example the plentiful amount of rules

since she was so use to having a set goal layed out for her she didn't know what to do after completing her mission;being a powerful person in the economy

so without a set goal she look at her interest of fashion and decided to make her life center around it

esmé has been betrayed by others without doing anything wrong she just loved money and disliked books and deemed a villain she didn't care for the insides of the sugar bowl she just wants her friends trust back

was she so untrustworthy to take away her duty and their trust in her?

this iis why I love esmé and loathe Beatrice

Esmé deserved better than Beatrice

[beatricebidelaire]

my favorite brotp for olaf is beatrice but the second is definitely esme. which maybe doesn't count but she still is the one that comes closest. like yeah eslaf is a thing, i'm not just talking about in canon but also i do tend to view them as friends with benefits when i think of them, and sex and committing crimes together are both important parts of relationship probably etc etc. but i guess i don't view them as, in love with, or even just love, each other.

but i also think they have a deeper connection than just friends with benefits. deeper connection than just committing crimes together (which in a way olaf and his troupe also did together). but this deeper connection is not romance. it's an understanding. that understanding is what made them able to be friends in a way, or else they'd probably be closer to, people who collaborate together on crimes for their own benefits, and happen to sleep together since it's convenient. but they have something more than that, the understanding, which makes it deeper than that, but it's something closer to friendship instead of romance. and the understanding came from both being betrayed by beatrice.

and i don't think they talk about it much - i mean, they definitely talk about beatrice a lot and complain about her and saying they hate her, but they don't talk about the vulnerable emotions it's all about "i hate beatrice" instead of "i miss her i wish she hadn't done all that" or stuff like that. but they still have a certain understanding. eslaf is friends with benefits but the benefits is more than just sex, it's hating on beatrice together