#beating the unemployed allegations

[brutulist]

hiatus ! i started work ( yippie! ) but it's very demanding, so give this a like & i'll shoot you my discord, mayhaps we can even write some fun little things on there while i commute. i'll be back after may 14th !

[moongirl7777]

this is so me since i’ve become a florist

— Susan Sontag, from “Death Kit,” (1967) (via lunamonchtuna)

[plasma-power]

there's this amazing Chinese place right by my work so everyday when I have the time I order a small shrimp lo mein and a bottle of soda. sometimes I fast so i can be hungry enough to finish it before work

[ambassadorquark]

lestat is kind of funny as hell for being like hey guys. i'm going to publish an autobiography and tie in rock opera where i not only confirm that vampires are real but also randomly explain a bunch of insane lore even the 43458 year old Order Of Occult Scholars dont know about. why? hehe :P

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

want to go to library to write but have an appointment so now I have to do minor coordination oh noooooo the horrorsssss

[jennsterjay]

Finally have an interview omggg

[sleepoutro]

so beyond exhausted. i think throwing a tantrum like a little child about this fucking mango i was going to eat not being ripe rn would help honestly

[honeyroastedpeanus]

my manager telling me hes looking to hire at least one more person onto the team and that he has nothing bad to say about me and we'll keep in contact.. wry smile 😼 i might have a guarenteed job after i graduate Who cheered!!!

[lsleofthelost]

fans wasnt the best way to phrase it. its like regular citizens who are into the drama that unfolds between this cast:

does anyone have suggestions for the fans' handles on twitter?

[formulaaone]

LOGAN SARGEANT OFFICIALLY BEATING THE UNEMPLOYED ALLEGATIONS

[disappointingcabbage]

TMAGP 21 thoughts, spoilers below the cut

“What if Alice is right about how fucked up the OIAR is?” I mean fuck, dude, she probably is

“It’s fine I can just quit if something tries to murder me” Sam that won’t help with the whole “monster trying to kill you thing” that’ll just make you unemployed in addition to being about to die

When Celia said she had a “complicated immigration status” I fucking cackled like girlie you are never beating the universe hopper allegations

Also yeah why did the OIAR not notice that she probably has next to no legal documentation of her existence? Like I get them being more lax than other government organizations but this is a whole other level

tbh it’s probably because Lena was like “eh fuck it this isn’t even in the top 70 weirdest things I’ve seen” and let it slide

“I wouldn’t be able to take Jack with me if I went back” Does this mean she knows how to go back?????

MAGNUS INSTITUTE CHESTER STATEMENT

ooh this is some alchemy shit

POLITICAL RESOURCES? did the institute have fucking plants in the government or did they just have, like, lobbyists?

love how this guy is like “we need stop being Christian centric when choosing the date to our fucked up eldritch ritual guys”

I’m sorry, a UNIVERSAL TRANSMUTATION? as in transforming the entire earth or even the whole universe???? Dude what???

The fucked up ritual in question is called the Dome Project, which judging only by the name sounds like they’re trying to make Flat Earth real, which is fucking hilarious

ok they were allegedly trying to create a utopia but every “utopia” is flawed so the question is how did they fuck this one up?

Oh damn they were trying to create a perfect“final state of society” that never changes. Even without the eldritch bullshit that’s a terrible idea just look at like every dystopian novel ever (and also the game slay the princess, which is built around the idea that change is a necessary component of life and has Jonny Sims voicing a lot of the dialogue)

I love how this guy’s best argument against bringing the world to a stagnant state is just “but we’re alchemists, guys, change is our whole thing :/”

Was I the only one who thought “et al” was pronounced like “et all” or is it just me? Or is it a regional thing?

Wait was their plan to actually just build a big ass dome to house a “perfect society”?

Oh shit they had actually already started construction.

Of course they were exploiting workers to build this “perfect dome”

THE DOME IS REAL????? (It’s called the millennium dome, don’t just google “dome project” you’ll just find a bunch of unrelated shit about business models and stuff)

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON’T KNOW HOW LONG THE DOME WILL BE THERE? Isn’t that a major safety issue?

bro thinks the place is supernaturally contaminated and he’s probably right

Oh boy it’s also contaminated with heavy metals the real danger here is lead poisoning

I’m sorry what the fuck??? Construction guy got cloned by some dirt in the site and then his clone just fucking yanked him into the dirt? Clone didn’t even bother to replace him

lol statement writer just went “tldr we shouldn’t do our ritual here it’s fucked up enough as it is and incorporating a stagnant utopia into our eldritch ritual is dumb and we shouldn’t do it”

Alice has realized that Freddy is purposefully giving Sam Magnus statements

GIRLIE DID YOU JUST DELETE IT FROM HIS CASELOAD???

oooh shit she got caught by Lena

“haha Sam’s computer keeps malfunctioning so I tried to fix it and he definitely gave me permission hahaha ANYWAYS when are we getting a new IT guy?” smooth, Alice. Smooth.

Oh shit where’s Gwen? She’s late coming back? Lena doesn’t know where she is????

Ink5oul probably got her

Was that a .jmj error noise I just heard?

Oh fuck we actually get answers to the Gwen question and she is in fact running from ink5oul

Jesus this chase scene is actually scary, I’m impressed. It’s kind of hard to unsettle me this much without involving one of my actual phobias. Nice.

Also I had to google what trash polka is, turns out it’s a really cool tattoo style that’s simultaneously photorealistic and trippy, usually done in black, white, and red.

Oh shit Ink5oul can mess with tattoos they didn’t do

oh fuck they caught Gwen

Hey why is Gwen monologuing like those corpses?

[ERROR]? Where have you been, loca?

WHY IS THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES THEME PLAYING UNDER GWEN’S STATEMENT MONOLOGUE?

The transcript describes [ERROR] as “a nightmarish specter of an older world” and I’m not sure what to make of that yet but they sure are possessive of their victims, apparently. Judging by the fact that they said “there is more” I think they’re targeting either anyone with institute ties or anyone in the OIAR. Maybe both.

Love that Gwen just fucked booked it instead of sticking around to witness whatever that whole [ERROR]/ ink5oul interaction was

I’m glad that [ERROR] didn’t kill ink5oul tbh I like them

THE TAPE RECORDER FUCKING BIT THEM IM CACKLING

The Magnus Protocol sure is a podcast

[not-so-rosyyy]

What are your tz predictions for 2024?

zendaya cements box office queen title with dune and challengers

tom returns to posting personal stuff on instagram but only to post z again

z slips and brings up tom unprovoked during press

a cute caribbean throwback photo/ story from a local or a fellow tourist comes out of nowhere

z guests on hot ones and tom posts a funny still of her on his story like she did of him in 2021

tom sneaks into a dune screening / challengers afterparty

tom beats the unemployed allegations with unexpected casting announcement

z gets cast in a high profile thriller or political drama

tz vacations somewhere in asia. or ireland.

they reclaim another city from the The Tomdaya Dark Age™️

z posts a mirror pic wearing a ring on her left ring finger but this time she won't scream "my haaaaaat" and just leave everyone in chaos

a pic of golfdaya finally drops

tom dogpound content returns

photo confirmation via nikki's insta story that granny tess gives zendaya bread

[janesurlife]

Beating the unemployed allegations

[max-nolastname]

no walrus crew member can beat all of the following allegations

sodomy

dental veneers

unemployed

bbl

dui

first degree murder

high treason

expired visa

osha violations

fake tan

[thatsuncleharrytoyouyoungman]

not beating the unemployed n unemployable allegations 🤪

[autisticbokutoenthusiast]

ep 11 rewatch stray thoughts cause im not immune to this show

im losing it at soong losing his mind trying to make sure that jump gets out now and jump being like 'damn i am hurrying... in my own way' its soooo the version of them that we talk about @jeffsatyr

aob appearing out of nowhere and first trying to throw hands like you are nottt winning that fight first damn

zouey being the one positioned closest to jason and being the only one jason will address out of the baddies.... also teena petting zouey the whole time...

i feel incredulby normal about oats hands.....

the way playboyy sneaks in the 'what is truth in the digital age' convo... but also why was jason addressing the pedophile allegations on facebook live... (tbf its giving rfk jr)

jump following porsche out of the cafe after watching him and tutor do whatever they just did

captain once again learning his actions have consequences...

hold on are captain tears running down keens face?!?!?! huuuuge if true

i love firstsoong. soong asking first not to try to get aob fired and first is like "but he beat me 🥺" and soong is like "and? you deserved it" cryinnnnn omg

who was driving the van nont and prom are in... cause they just overheard that jason and prom call

prom says hell check jasons private room at playboyy, but didnt he already take nont in there during the babushka breakdown??

the camera shifting to zouey when the other baddies say jason took nant cause nant was blackmailing aurkay i see you

jump and porsche 🥺 jumps 'we've known eachother for so long. but it feels like we dont know eachother at all' IM SCREAMIGNG

lady and the tramp-ing the noodles HOW DID I FORGET THIS

something about jump being his usual sincere self and it actaully being returned....im unwell

prom being a romcom nerd is everything btw

kissies

the song that plays during th captainkeen scene is toooo good like its such a good choice. also this is lowkey my fav scene of theirs besides the ones with projections (the chess and the tigers)

playboyy employee running for his life to warn everyone the baddies are coming and they walk in like the towns most annoying group of college kids jsdalkfdjakfjalkfsjf

nont calling the baddies out, and first who for once is focused on the investigation is out in a second, zouey is busy with portraiture and captain is doing the exact thing they should have expected him to do in this situation

aobpuen: squaring tf up the baddies: 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️

nont trying find his brother, prom and soong trying to have a normal day at work, aobpuen unemployed, but now is the perfect time to try to teach captain that actions have consequences again like sjkfjsdf

ZOUEY SAYS "YOU KNEW WHAT PORSCHE WENT THROUGH. YOU KNEW WHAT I WENT THROUGH" TO FIRST SO FIRST KNOWS!!! when did he tell first

the way they mightve found some real fucking clues if the baddies didnt start airing everything out at the worst moment...

NOT THE PREVIEW ENDING WITH AOB FIRING THE GUN AT SOMEONE AFTER EVERYONE GOES MISSING ONLY FOR THE ENDING THEME TO PLAY ASJFASKFJSALKJFDKS

i forgot how much i love this show omgggg