#beabadobee

[jeninyourheart]

[thischarmingamy]

Favorite Music of 2024

There was so much brilliant music that came out in 2024! I’m having the worst time narrowing down my list of faves. Luckily, my two cats, Candy O. and Ada Monroe, have been assisting me. Ada Monroe looking mad because I wasn’t playing Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds at the time It’s my hope that at least one person finds something they dig through this post. If you’re a Spotify person, do check out…

[doorlene]

lux ౨ৎ

sixteen, she her, sea. marauders era, soc, bridgerton.

[dustylightrays]

[sersh]

eliana (@_femalien) on Instagram Stories, July 18th 2023

[queerwhohatesithere]

i’m finally at the stadium!!! beabadobee is amazing and sooo cute and i didn’t get to do my ivy costume bc of time and money but someone else bought ivy and wrapped it around themselves so i’m glad my vision lives 💕

[catpocalypse]

ok i know soren aged terribly but im so inlove w the lyrics in that FUCKING SONG. i am so obsessed with ALL OF IT.

LIKE WHAT. bea is literally such an amazing writer i cant do this,,, a curse that cant be broken,,, LEAVE ME ALONE

A MEMORY THAT FADES THAT I CANNOT LOSE SHUT UP. BEFORE I DIE... oh my god the inevitability of it all and still choosing that. the KNOWING of it all and still choosing THAT. this is so crazy and insane and *falls dead*

LIKE DO NOT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THIS FINAL FNAIOEFNA NNNNNNNN I WANT TO EAT THIS SONG. loving someone not just /including/ their flaws but /especially/ their flaws. i will never ever shut up about soren and how its literally like one of the best love songs I'll ever hear ever. the melody being so personal like that is just her guitar and her voice and that's all she needs to tell us how much this love MEANS to her. how so many things are being cast away or set aside just because of it... i am so affected all the time ever... ok that's all

[f-thot-f1tzgerald]

sobbing my eyes out to fall in love with a girl by cavetown knowing the girl im falling in love with is my best friend and although she likes me back we cant do anything about it because my last relationship really fucked me up and anything we had would end badly and id rather die than lose her

[kxsagi]

“𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐨𝐟”

a/n: tried to make it not too angsty since i'm a happy person, but it's when reader finds out she's pregnant post-divorce! slight mentions of "doing it." inspired by @neeeooon's "when they find out they have a kid, pt 2” I LOVE HER WORKS

you and isagi were truly that one couple where you couldn’t tell if they were dating or just best friends. 

strangers would glance at the two of you and wait for some sign of affection to confirm an answer to their thoughts, friends would always admire how the two of you made the cutest couple, and family would always support your relationship through thick and thin. 

over four years of dating inevitably ended up in marriage, a beautiful ceremony celebrated with the most beautiful rings. 

but, oh how marriage was the worst thing that could’ve happened to you. 

you’re not too sure what made everything spiral downwards. only after a month of initiating vows, your first ever argument as a married couple occurred, and boy was it heated. more only followed after that, becoming more frequent as time went on, usually ending in nights at a friend’s house or spent alone in your shared house. 

the final straw was when isagi insulted you in an escalating fight. 

“why do you always shut me out?" you asked, voice trembling and eyes narrowed. 

isagi turned away, running a hand through his hair. “i’m trying to think, woman. just give me a minute." 

the word landed like a slap. your breath hitched and your face paled. 

to this day, you can still taste his venom on your tongue and feel the burn on your cheek from that moment. he had never talked to you like that before. sure, he had a dirty mouth, but he had never gone so far as to insult you or call you a name like that. 

without thinking, you signed the divorce papers and forced yourself to show up in court to finalize the divorce. your now ex-husband wasn’t there, but he had his parents speak for him instead. 

just two days later, you’re panicking. 

as if the mental toll wasn’t enough from your recent divorce, there was a positive pregnancy test resting on your bathroom sink counter, staring back at you. with a hand clasped to your mouth, you remembered the last passionate night the two of you shared after another heated argument, ending with him releasing inside of you, despite knowing you were ovulating. 

holding back the sobs was unsuccessful as you pondered about what to do. 

𐙚

over two years later, you’re carrying your 18-month old boy on your hip as you attend to chores around the house when you hear your doorbell ringing. rushing to see who this unexpected visitor may be, thinking it may be your mother coming for a surprise visit, you’re shocked to see isagi’s best friend, bachira. 

“hey, long time no see! i feel like i haven’t seen you since your wedding,” he laughs, as bubbly as ever. 

quickly turning to try and hide your baby boy, you nervously laugh. “oh hey bachira, how are you doing?” 

bachira dodges the question, noticing who you’re holding. “to be honest, i haven’t talked to isagi in over a year because we’ve both been so busy with our soccer careers. but i at least thought he would tell me he had a kid.” 

you play dumb. “isagi? this isn’t –” you stop yourself short, knowing there was no point in lying when your baby boy was an exact copy of his father, even with the tiny hair sprout. 

“uh huh… that’s definitely believable. i’m assuming isagi doesn’t know about this either?” 

not long after that, you gave up in defeat, inviting bachira in as you explained everything: the arguments, divorce, and pregnancy. your baby boy absolutely loved bachira, and bachira loved him. the two grew close rather quickly. 

so when your doorbell rang the next day, you expected to see bachira at the door yet again. a smile was already on your face as you held your baby to your hip like glue, happy that someone other than your family and girlfriends was going to spend time with him. 

but your eyes widen when you not only see bachira, but also isagi. 

your ex-husband is staring at you in shock, jaw clenched, staring back and forth at you and his son. he had no idea that this entire time you were parenting alone. “is he mine? no – that’s just a stupid question. he is mine.” 

bachira took your baby from you, walking over to the living room to leave the two of you alone to talk. 

“when… when did you find out you were pregnant?” 

“two days after our divorce.” 

isagi runs a hand through his hair in frustration. “so if you were pregnant for nine months then… he’s 18-months now?” 

you nod slowly, heart rate breaking records as you stand in front of the man you once loved. at the time, you didn’t know what decision to make, whether to keep the baby, contact his father, or just raise him alone. 

“i know we ended off on bad terms, but you didn’t wanna tell me?” isagi glares. “what the hell?!” 

“what was i supposed to do?! you didn’t even show up to the court room!” you yell, your volume causing the man to flinch. "how do you think i felt?!"

“how could i?! i still –” isagi groans, stopping himself from saying something without thinking again. 

realizing the situation, you take a deep breath, exhaling with your hands on your hips. 

your ex-husband takes the hint and clears his throat. “well... you’re living in the same house.” 

“because your parents spoke for you in court and said that you would give me the house. and… thank you for paying it off. i know that’s not easy,” you quietly say, so soft that isagi could barely hear you. 

“it’s… no problem…” he sighs. 

a long stretch of awkward silence stands between the two of you, two gazes looking everywhere but each other. 

bachira comes back, “i heard silence and took it as a sign that you’ve talked some stuff out?” 

while that was far from the truth, you nodded, ready to talk to your ex-husband more later, but for now, he deserved to see his son. 

taking your baby boy from his uncle bachira’s arms, you look up at eyes you once loved. eyes you fell in love with. and now eyes that make you feel heavy regret and guilt more than anything else. 

“do you want to hold him?” 

isagi is breathless, caught off guard by the question, but he reaches his large hands out. “yes…” 

the moment his son is in his arms and looks up at him with those copy of eyes, isagi feels like he’s changed. 

he puts himself in your shoes, wondering how hard it must have been for you to support yourself when he was the breadwinner of the family. also how lonely you must have felt, and suddenly, he feels guilty and regretful all at once. 

the two of you created this beautiful human, this new life. 

“18 months old…” 

isagi manages to smile, nuzzling his nose against his now smiling son’s own. “i already missed one birthday. i’m not missing another one again.” 

© 𝐤𝐱𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐢

a/n: LMK IF YOU WANT A PT. 2 BC I’M WILLING TO MAKE ONE FOR THIS!!!

(header image credits go to @reinyy-days here on tumblr! HER ART IS AMAZING THIS IS MY FAVORITE ISAGI FANART EVER)

[juliannajoy69]

my new song 'goldstar' is out 1/31 <3 if u could presave ot that would mean the world 2 me!

[mantzanita3]

To fall in love with a girl

[deariroha]

you ought to know that i think we’re one and the same.

but i don’t think we could help it, no, i don’t think we could help it.

we dont talk that much, guess ‘cause nothing has changed.

for @swhore bc if they didnt help me with the gif i wouldnt have posted this

[kchuuu]

  𓂃  moments that cease to exist ! 📚

like & reblog !

[imarsmp3]

Beabadoobee twt/disc layout!