#be ready for madness cause it is here and I am embracing it

[biteinsane]

Didn't have the best year but I got quite a few more things done than I thought.

On to next year.

[flowerandblood]

The Price of Pride (24/?)

[ canon • Aemond x Royce • female ]

[ warnings: smut, targcest stuff, the angst, uncomfortable conversations, offensive terms and mild violence ]

[ description: Prince Aemond finds a solution to the disproportion in the number of dragons between Dragonstone and King's Landing: he decides to find dragon blood and, like his half-sister, train dragon riders. He takes as his target the daughter of Daemon Targaryen and Rhea Royce, whom he abducts and imprisons in the Red Keep. Slow burn, darkish, insolent, arrogant Aemond. I have combined several requests here: (dragon blood female & prisoner female). ]

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

Next chapters: Masterlist

_____

He was gentle because of the baby.

Or at least that's what she kept telling herself as he made love to her again slowly and affectionately, looking deep into her eyes. He panted and murmured into her mouth between hot, messy kisses full of their saliva and tongues, his broad hand stroking her hair as he built the familiar tension in her loins with deep, sure thrusts.

It was a sweet torture; he already knew her body intimately and was aware of where to hit so that a thrill of wonderful pleasure ran through her spine each time. All she could do was run her fingers down his naked, sweaty back, stroking his long jaw, babbling and moaning beneath him like a little girl, wanting to take everything he was giving her.

He was gentle because of the baby: because he didn't want her to miscarry.

They had both suffered too much already.

So she absorbed his affection and warmth, dreading the moment when she would awaken as if from a beautiful dream, colliding again with his rougher side.

On the one hand, she also craved that part of him, dark and unpredictable, aggressive and cruel – however, now that he was vulnerable and sweet, coming each time with a loud sigh of relief, she felt with him safer than ever before.

His embrace was full of care, understanding, support.

Everything about his attitude said: I don't want to hurt you.

"I want to fly to Runestone."

Her husband, lying right next to her on the bedding, breathing heavily after their shared exertion, looked at her with shock mixed with disbelief, his eyebrows arched in consternation.

"What?" He asked dryly.

"I want to fly to Runestone." She repeated. "To see my cousin. Gain his support for your cause. To return home."

"King's Landing is your home, as is any place where I am." He hissed impatiently, his pupil narrowed like that of a cat.

He hadn't expected this, and her words came as a blow to him.

He felt threatened and was ready to attack.

He swallowed hard, taken aback as she lifted her hand up, her fingers running gently down his jaw.

"I never asked you for anything. I never expected anything. But if I'm supposed to heal, I have to do it." She said calmly.

"You are healed. And you are with child. I'm not allowing it." He replied coldly, rising from the bed, grabbing impatiently at his tunic that lay on the floor.

She swallowed hard, leaning on her elbow, feeling her heart pounding like mad.

"I will do this with or without your permission, husband."

She saw his hands freeze in half-motion as he fastened the buckles of his tunic, his nostrils twitched, his lips pressed together in a thin line.

She was stepping on the edge of a knife and she knew it, but she couldn't act otherwise.

"As the wife of the Prince Regent, I am a free woman and have the right to visit my relatives. Don't I?" She asked in a trembling voice, clenching her fingers on the fabric of the sheet.

He stood motionless for a moment, staring dully ahead, his chest rising and falling rapidly in loud, raspy breaths.

He was furious and torn internally.

"I am your family now. I thought it was enough for you." He said with some strange kind of regret that made her feel a deep, painful sting in her heart.

"You are the love of my life." She whispered.

She saw that he swallowed hard, hearing these words – they surprised him and he had not expected them at the moment. His eye grew big, like that of a little boy, filled with warm affection and a desire to believe what she said.

"Then why?" He asked. "Why do you want to leave me? Now that…"

Now that we are closer than ever, she finished for him in her mind.

"Your presence saves me during the day. It allows me to breathe. But at night I dream about my father and I won't find peace until I speak to someone who watched him and my mother. I need answers. I can't ask him anymore because I killed him myself."

She felt her body begin to tremble as she said those words aloud – she felt like they were some kind of curse, something that weighed over her like a dark, heavy cloud.

"I want to forgive myself. I want to find peace so that instead of mourning him, I can focus on our child who lives in my womb. And on you." She finished, looking at him hopefully.

She could see that he was hesitating, she could feel it in his clenched hands, in his blank stare, in his bent figure.

"I don't know him. How can I be sure that he will not make you a prisoner? That he will not hand you over to Rhaenyra so that she can threaten me? Force me to bend the knee?" He muttered, finally sharing with her what was truly troubling him.

"But I know him, my husband. He's a proud but good man. Faithful to his family. Faithful to me, just as I have always been faithful to him. He and I are alike. I know that with his support, conquering the Eyrie and striking the final blow against your sister will be easier. But I have to appear there alone to make him believe that I am doing this of my own free will. To make him accept our marriage."

"What right has he to decide whether our marriage is valid in the eyes of the gods or not?" He growled, looking at her with pain mixed with rage.

"You abducted me against his will. You humiliated him in the eyes of his men, his own servants." She muttered, shrugging her shoulders, unable to comprehend how he could not understand this.

"Perhaps he did not protect you well enough. After all, abducting you in the middle of the night was surprisingly easy. No one rushed to your aid, am I wrong? Your cousin did not storm the gates of the Red Keep at the head of his army, demanding that I return you to him." He said coldly, causing an unpleasant shiver to pass through her.

"You sound like you're proud of yourself, and just a few days ago you assured me you regretted it." She reminded him wryly.

She gasped as he turned and moved towards the door like an enraged bear, leaving the chamber with a loud slam of the door.

Why, after all she had done for him, did he not even try to understand her?

She buried her face in her hands, thinking she must have done it.

She needed to know the answers to all the questions she had in her head.

As she rose from her bed after so many weeks of misery, putting on her riding attire again, she felt powerful – a sense that she was taking her destiny into her own hands and decided who she really was gave her strength.

That was what she was missing; the freedom that, after all, had been taken from her by her own husband the day he abducted her from Runestone.

She just wanted to make it right.

To make her cousin forgive him for this insult.

She believed this could determine the fate of their war.

To her disappointment, her husband returned to his chamber very late and did not even look at her when she rose to meet him. Instead of approaching her, he sat down in a chair right by the hearth and froze like that, thoughtful, staring into the flames. He looked like a stone – his face and gaze were completely expressionless – she thought that this sight reminded her of something, and then she understood.

He looked just like he had when she met him.

Is this what she will see when she returns?

The man who had closed his heart to her anew?

"Aemond." She mumbled, approaching him slowly, feeling fearful for some reason.

She realised that he would not forgive her for this.

That there was still that vain and proud part of him that couldn't accept that she wanted to defy his command.

His will.

In his eyes she would be blamed for everything that would be the consequences of her decision.

He didn't even flinch at hearing his name – his body gave the impression that he was comfortably spread out, however, she knew it was only an illusion – she could see by his clenched jaw, by his fingers rubbing against each other in a nervous gesture that he was full of annoyance and embitterment.

"Please, my love. Let us not part in anger. Give me your blessing." She muttered with difficulty, staring at him pleadingly, but he did not look at her.

‘No,’ was his reply.

And although a moment ago she had been completely sure of what she wanted to do and that she would do it at any cost, now she wasn't certain that the price wasn't too high: whether she was able and willing to risk what she had built with him, even for herself.

"Why can't you understand me? Why, even though I always forgive you, you can't sacrifice your pride for me for once? Now, when I need you the most." She cried out in a breaking voice, feeling tear after tear begin to run down her face, making the room around her blurry.

She saw that he swallowed loudly, as if he remembered that he should breathe, but he didn't move even a bit, as if he was a stone statue.

He was punishing her because she wanted to leave him.

Or at least that's what it looked like in his mind.

She pressed her lips together as her hand undid the buckles of her coat – he flinched and raised his hands in a defensive gesture, shocked when she threw the leather material at his face. He only rose when he saw that she wanted to do the same with her boots, but he didn't make a sound – he bent down, avoiding the impact as the object flew over his head, hitting the wall on the other side.

"I'm staying. Are you satisfied? Look. I'm going back to bed where I belong. To fucking and bearing your children as you desire." She exhaled in a voice breaking with rage, hissing through her teeth as if she wanted to bite him.

She tore off her clothes, whooping with her own cry until she was left in just her nightgown, and then threw herself on the bed, snuggling into the cold sheets.

She had lost, and it was a feeling full of disappointment and bitterness; she had lost to her fear that she would lose him, to the fear that when she returned she would find him in the arms of the Witch of Harrenhal, to the fear that without his love her life would again lose meaning.

She could hear him breathing loudly and she could hear him standing exactly where he was, shocked by her outburst, by what had happened, but most of all and beyond all reason by the fact that she had stayed.

Despite everything she had told him.

It seemed to her that an eternity passed before she heard the quiet creaking of the wood beneath his feet, before she felt the weight of his body behind her back on the bed, before his hand touched her arm.

She pulled away from him, furious.

"Now you want to touch me? Now you want to graciously open your mouth? You have no shame." She growled, feeling her heart pounding like mad in her chest, heavy tears of bitterness running down her red, swollen face.

I hate you, she thought.

I hate what you made me do.

"If you wish so much to speak to your cousin: let him come to Harrenhal. Send word to him, and I will receive him with all honours." He whispered in a trembling voice.

He was terrified, for this was not what he had expected.

He had thought that he would be the one to play the victim, the wounded man whose heart had been broken by his beloved woman.

And now everything had turned against him.

She snorted, tightening her lips in exasperation at the thought.

"He is to come here like a dog to my summons? He's a proud man. He won't until he hears from your lips that what you did to me was unworthy." She said dryly.

She heard him swallow hard, tense. He was silent for a long moment, as if fighting with himself.

"I will be the one to send him a letter, then. I will ask his forgiveness. I will let him know that you wish to see him and that no harm will come to him or his men in Harrenhal." He proposed at last, surprising her.

I will ask his forgiveness.

"He will know that this is about the Eyrie and not about me. He won't believe your good intentions. He will think you are trying to use me for your own ends." She muttered, feeling her rage slowly begin to drain out of her.

He was trying to give her something in return.

To find a solution that would satisfy them both.

"What he thinks is not important: what will matter is that he will come here to see you. If, as you say, he is a wise man, he knows that the balance of power does not tip on Lady Arryn's side."

"And what if he refuses? If he remains faithful to her?" She asked in a trembling voice, feeling the question hover over them like a heavy cloud.

Her husband was silent for a long time.

"I will let him leave, for the sake of my affection for you. But when it comes to the battle, you cannot expect him to experience my favour." He said at last.

She turned on her back to look at him – he was lying very close to her body, but he did not try to touch her. His gaze was the same again as it had been when he was desperate – he was looking at her, hoping that what he had said, his efforts to make things right were enough for her to forgive him.

"When will you send word to him?" She asked quietly, playing with her fingers.

"Tomorrow at the very dawn. If you wish, I will let you read what I have written." He whispered, softening with each passing moment.

His fury passed, exactly as hers had.

They both took a step back.

She shook her head.

"I don't need to read it. I trust you to write the right thing." She mumbled.

She heard him swallow hard, twisting in his place.

"Can I touch you?" He asked, and she nodded.

She sighed as his arms embraced her instantly, as his broad hand pressed her face into his chest, as his familiar, soothing scent filled her lungs. She clenched her fingers against the material of his tunic and breathed out loud, feeling relieved.

"Forgive me. I don't know what to do with myself when you enrage me, so I remain silent." He whispered at last, combing his hand through her dark curls.

I know, she thought.

That's just the way you are.

"Forgive me for throwing things at you. I didn't mean to hurt you." She replied, trailing her fingers down his arm.

"I know, my love. I know I'm a difficult person. I'm trying to change. To make you proud of me." He said and leaned in, placing a long, warm kiss on the top of her head.

My love.

"I am proud of you." She said, lifting her head up, meeting his face.

His gaze was gentle – his thumb ran over her soft cheek, sinking into the silky structure of her skin.

"I don't wish to fight you. You are my greatest ally and I need you by my side. You carry our future within you and you cannot put yourself at risk." He whispered.

She nodded with understanding and purred quietly as his full lips placed a wet, tender kiss on her forehead.

"Did you speak honestly then?" He asked suddenly, nuzzling his nose into her face.

"What do you mean?"

"You said I was the love of your life." He said, looking at her uncertainly, as if he feared he would see something in her gaze that would contradict that confession.

"You are." She whispered. "It is a difficult love that requires sacrifices, but I believe you are worth my efforts. That I know you and your heart."

She said, sliding her hand down to the area on his chest where she could clearly feel a strong beat underneath.

"You were the only one who always believed in me. You always helped me when I fell. You could have taken advantage of my weakness, but you didn't." He muttered wearily, clearly moved for some reason. "You are not to me only a vessel to conceive and bear my children. That was the fate that befell my mother and I would not condemn my own wife to the same. If this is how you feel by my side, forgive me, for it means that I am not fulfilling my duties as a husband properly."

She swallowed hard, feeling the tears under her eyelids again, however, this time for a completely different reason; he touched her heart the most at moments like this.

When he opened up at least for a moment.

"No. You are a good husband. No one has ever cared for me the way you do." She whispered, stroking his cheek tenderly.

They embraced each other and fell asleep like that at last, knowing that there was nothing more that could be said.

Indeed, as promised, the next day the first thing he did was to write a letter – she could see that he had thought long and hard about how to put his thoughts into words. They both knew that diplomacy was not his strongest asset, but she wanted him to prove to her and to himself that if he wanted it, he could behave properly.

That day she attended the council with him for the first time since the day her father died.

Although she had not expected it, her return was most warmly welcomed by Criston Cole.

"My Lady. Accept my sincerest condolences." He said before they moved on, completely surprising her.

She knew that the fact that she had chosen her husband over her father was proof to him that he had been mistaken in his judgement – she had never blamed him for thinking she was a spy, as he was, in his own way, trying to protect the royal family.

However, what touched her most was that his words were sincere.

The silent war between them had been resolved.

Although Gwayne Hightower was not thrilled with the idea of bringing Lord of Runestone to Harrenhal for fear that he would divulge information to the enemy about their troop numbers and plans, Ser Criston and her husband unanimously agreed that his support would be worth the risk.

"If the vassals of House Arryn were to turn against their lady, the Eyrie would be left completely defenceless. We would cut Rhaenyra off from her allies in the North and gain another advantage. We know she is trying to lead an army from Winterfell to the south of the Kingdom and is surely waiting for the right opportunity to exact revenge." Cole said, to which her husband nodded.

"We're in a good position and now she's the one who has to worry about how to secure victory. She's desperate and will certainly make mistakes. Let's look for allies in the Vale to further weaken the morale of her supporters. Once her own people lose faith in her, her new dragon riders will also abandon her. This could be our chance."

Her cousin had not replied to her husband's letter, but she knew full well that he would not do so. She felt, however, that he would come to see her, and she waited impatiently for that moment, which came a few days later.

"My Lady. Lord of Runestone has arrived."

For the first time in many months, she felt pure joy – only now, sitting alone in one of the stone chambers, she realised how much she had missed him.

Her husband had allowed her to speak to her relative in private – admittedly there were guards standing at the door, but she was still grateful to him for making a concession to her.

As the door opened, she rose from her chair, smiling broadly. Lord of Runestone stepped inside in full armour, as if ready to be challenged – one of the guards approached him before he had time to cross the threshold of the chamber.

"Your sword and dagger, my lord." He said, extending his hand to him.

Her cousin threw her a protracted, frustrated look and she nodded, encouraging him to do as he was asked. Admittedly reluctantly, he gave the guards his weapons – when he stepped into the room and the door finally closed behind him, she threw herself into his arms.

"Allard!" She called out, embracing him around the waist. Her relative reciprocated the embrace and sighed heavily, as if relieved.

Allard Royce was a stocky, tall man: his dark hair fell in thick curls over his shoulders, his fresh stubble adding to his age, although he was only ten years older than her. He grasped her face in his hands and lifted it so that she looked at him – she smiled even wider, seeing his familiar gaze.

"I have come to free you from this stone prison." He said.

She blinked, feeling a cold discomfort in her stomach, and laughed, shaking her head.

"There is no need for that, cousin. I'm not here against my will." She said, forcing herself to be calm and light in her voice.

Allard furrowed his thick eyebrows in displeasure and regret.

"Has his manipulation gone this far already? Has he succeeded in dragging you to his side?" He asked, lowering his hands, causing another wave of unpleasant feeling to run down her spine.

She swallowed hard and shook her head, feeling the panic rising inside her.

"What he did was undignified and reckless, it's true. But he never hurt me. I agreed to marry him of my own free will." She muttered, playing with her fingers in a nervous impulse.

Why was she convinced that this conversation would turn out very differently?

Her cousin snorted and moved forward, circling the room with a loud clang of his steel armour.

"So why all this farce? This letter? Are you trying to convince me to kneel before the Uzurpator?" He asked coldly, and she shook her head again.

"N-no. I wanted to ask you about my mother. And my father." She mumbled.

"The same one your husband killed?" He sneered, making her heart thump harder in her chest.

No.

I killed him, she thought.

But she felt ashamed to utter those words.

"Yes. My father challenged him." She explained, looking at the old wooden floor beneath her feet. "But before he fell, he told me that my mother added poison to my milk when I was a child. Is that true?"

Allard stopped in half step and threw her a surprised look full of horror. She saw in his expression that her question made him uncomfortable, as he turned his face towards the window.

"I don't know anything about it." He replied.

She swallowed hard, knowing he had lied to her face.

"My father said you were the one who informed him of this."

Her cousin closed his eyes and sighed, as if the conversation was making him very tired.

"That night you got a high fever. There were… rumours spreading around the fortress. I didn't know what to do, so I sent word to him. I hoped he would do the right thing for once. And then he killed Rhea." He said dispassionately, shrugging his shoulders.

"Because she wouldn't let him take me to King's Landing." She said wearily, feeling that this was the moment.

The moment of truth.

She felt a cold shiver run along her body as her relative burst out laughing.

"And you believed him? Then why didn't he take you with him after he murdered her, hm? Who could forbid him from doing so? Do you think King Viserys would not have supported his own brother in this matter even if I had objected?" He scoffed, making her feel the pleasant image she'd been putting together in her head for the past weeks begin to slowly crack.

She wanted to believe that he loved her.

She wanted to believe that if he could, he would have acted differently.

But the truth was that he had never fought for her and perhaps that was why he had grabbed her hand then, deep underwater.

Perhaps it was his apology.

"Do you wish to hear anything more from my lips, Princess Targaryen, or may I return to my duties?" He asked lightly, casting her a look of regret and disappointment.

As if he wanted to tell her that he had raised her differently.

She was supposed to be a Royce, not a Targaryen.

"Forgive me. I did not mean to insult you. I thought this meeting would bring you joy, as it did to me." She muttered.

"Your husband, the self-proclaimed Prince Regent, humiliated me in front of my people. He made you his whore, giving cause for gossip and mockery to the entire Kingdom, and then graciously married you because of your kinship without even asking my opinion, even though I was the one who raised you. He didn't invite me to the nuptial ceremony, he ignored me in every possible way."

"He knew that because of Lady Arryn you would not be able to attend." She mumbled with difficulty, feeling tears of shame burning under her eyelids.

He had made you his whore, giving cause for gossip and mockery to the entire Kingdom.

Was this really how the Realm perceived her?

"Do you think this cold cunt from the high mountains would have stopped me? That I would have chosen her and not you? I raised you. I did." He hissed, slamming his fist into his armour.

"I know. I know, but I swear his words and his apology are sincere." She said pleadingly, but her cousin shook his head.

"This piece of parchment is supposed to be a compensation? He can wipe his ass with it. He's just a little cripple with a big dragon who flies around the Seven Kingdoms thinking he's king. Did he burn his brother by accident too?" He exclaimed, infuriating her for some reason.

"Your words are treason." She said coldly.

Allard closed his mouth, breathing heavily, a challenge in his eyes.

"Cut off my head then. Show me who you really are and what you choose."

"No. Go back to Runestone. My husband was right. It was a mistake." She said dryly, feeling nothing but emptiness in her mind.

Although Allard had always hidden his feelings perfectly, she could see in his gaze that her words had caused him pain. He shook his head in disbelief and moved towards the door without even a word of farewell.

She collapsed onto the chair listening to his footsteps in the distance, only then letting bitter tears of disappointment run down her cheeks.

She imagined that they would throw themselves into each other's arms, that after a few cruel words they would come to an understanding, that she would tell him about the child in her womb, that there was hope for them and their lineage.

To him, however, she had become a stranger.

A Targaryen Princess.

She lowered her gaze as she heard someone's footsteps again, but this time moving closer to the chamber she was in – she knew that her husband had stopped at the threshold of the door and that he was looking at her.

She knew that he had seen how the conversation had gone.

"Hāedar." Was all he said, and that was enough.

She hid her face in her hands, feeling ashamed that she had been so naïve: suddenly her idea of travelling, all by herself, to her family stronghold seemed plainly childish to her.

She cried out loud, feeling humiliated and disappointed, believing that she could have had two families at once, that their bond was more important than politics and war.

She heard him move towards her – he stepped over her and embraced her, cuddling her head into his stomach. He stroked her hair and just looked at her, silent.

She thought he certainly felt a hot satisfaction, but wouldn't admit it out loud.

"You were right." She whispered. "It was a mistake."

"I'm sorry." He replied, though she knew he wasn't.

Perhaps some part of him felt sorry for her, but the other part was pleased that no one could take her away from him anymore.

She couldn't blame him for that.

"Did you find the answers to your questions?" He asked, combing his fingers through her dark curls.

She closed her eyes, thinking that now there was only them.

Their family.

Their bond.

Their destiny.

"Yes."

[twola]

Defying Conventions II

Arthur Morgan x F!Reader Smut (18+), MDNI, A/B/O

➵ Fic Masterlist ➵ AO3 Link ➵ Previous Please be warned -cw: omegaverse, breeding kink, impregnation, pregnant sex, graphic birth. If those things bother you, then this is not the fic for you.

I feel like I am taking a big risk with this one. As someone who has recently gone through childbirth, it is definitely a traumatic thing, even when things go well. I write as a coping mechanism for trauma - so here it is.

It’s all going to shit.

Hosea. Lenny. Dead. John just busted out of Sisika. The bank robbery in Lemoyne gone completely south - and being marooned on that godforsaken island.

Not to mention Dutch and his behavior. Seems like Micah is in the man’s ear more than anyone else nowadays.

Beaver Hollow is miserable - damp, in these dark, dusty hills of Roanoke. It's stifling, the misery this place exudes.

“Arthur-” 

Arthur whips around, ready to snap at yet another person asking him to do something-

It’s you. Your cheeks are the slightest bit flushed. His hackles settle, temper calmed by the nearness of his other half.

“What d’ya need, darlin’?” He smiles as he raises his hand to welcome you into an embrace.

You don’t move, causing him to frown.

“I… uhm, I-” You stumble slightly, your hand unconsciously moving to your neck, where you have pinned a shawl to cover your skin.

Realization dawns on him, and a low, dull ache begins to burn in his gut.

“Y’ sayin’ we need to get away for a few days?”

You sheepishly shake your head, cheeks flushed. His smile returns and he takes the step to move closer. He wraps his arms around you, clutching you to him. You sigh and melt into his strong embrace.

“I’m sorry,” you mumble into his chest, shuddering slightly as you can feel your heat closing in on you. Tomorrow you’d be a blithering mess.

Arthur presses his lips to your forehead.

“Reckon that’s the best thing anyone’s asked me to do in a while.”

“You ain’t mad?” You look up at him, incredulous.

“Am I mad about my mate askin’ me to get away from this shithole for a few days and spend the hours ruttin’ away?” 

“I just hate being so… needy. Dumb omega shit.” You sigh, burying your head in his chest again. 

Arthur sighs knowingly, then grins as he pulls the shawl down to expose your neck and immediately buries his head against your clammy skin.

You yelp in surprise and arousal as you feel his tongue press against your mating gland - it’s a good thing that he has one arm strong around your waist, or else you would be stumbling to the ground.

Arthur groans quietly, squeezing you gently. “I’m yer alpha. Y’know what I need? I need to satisfy you.”

You try to push him back, afraid that you’re going to go into heat standing here in the middle of camp as he nuzzles at your neck. Alas, your lover is built like a brick wall, and it is only after quite a bit of fidgeting and you trying to yank your shawl back up that he takes the hint.

“Annesburg? Or d’ya want to go further?” He drawls as you try to collect yourself. 

You scowl up at him, “After that, we’ll need to go to Annesburg. Now.”

Arthur smirks, his eyes hidden under the rim of that old gambler’s hat. “Say less, darlin’ girl. Say less.” 

-

It’s a miracle that you can stand upright, there in the gunsmith’s shop as Arthur leans on the counter. While he had been in the foulest of moods earlier in the day, he’d found a second wind the moment you told him you needed him - suddenly acting full alpha - cocky and possessive and hell-bent on getting you desperate for him.

Christ, the whole ride down from Beaver Hollow was near excruciating - Arthur having dragged you onto the saddle in front of him, pressed against him completely, instead of pulling you up on his horse’s rump. Leaning over every so often and nipping at your neck. Groping your breast after passing another rider on the road. By the time the two of you had ridden into the dusty mine town, the flush that had dusted your cheeks before extended down your neck and chest.

“One room. ‘nd here’s extra to not bother us for a few days.”

The poor gunsmith blanches, completely understanding the threatening tone in Arthur’s voice. He nods, handing the alpha a key, muttering directions to the room, in the building next to the shop.

Arthur smirks, turning around and grabbing your arm, guiding you quickly to the room. Punching the key into the lock, he opens the door and watches as you stumble inside. A rumble, all alpha, punches out of his chest as you wipe at your brow, leaning against the wardrobe in the room.

“I’m just gonna get the horse straight. Be back in a minute.” Arthur calls back as he steps out of the room, leaving you to pant wearily as you survey the room that you’re going to lock the two of you in for the next couple of days.

You whine as you paw at the shawl hiding your neck, finally unlatching it and throwing it unceremoniously to the floor. Feverishly unbuttoning your blouse, you pull your arms out of it and toss it aside as well. You’re yanking the straps of your chemise down your arms and baring your breasts as Arthur re-enters the room. Your chemise hangs around your waist as your hands cup your breasts, your breath coming in short, fast pants.

“Need it that bad, omega?” Arthur purrs, pushing your hands away from your chest and placing his own atop your breasts, squeezing gently as you moan.

“Don’t - don’t be cruel- I’m…shit, I’m in heat.” You gasp out as his thumb traces over your nipple. Your knees shake as your hands grasp at him, and you feel your bloomers dampen as your slick begins to come.

One of Arthur’s hands moves from your breast to your waist and immediately starts yanking at your skirts, loosening the waist and pushing them down, along with your bloomers, to pool on the floor at your ankles, leaving you completely bare.

“I’ve got you, darlin’ girl,” Arthur grasps one of your hands and presses it against his massive erection in his pants, and you mewl desperately, craving the way he fills you.

“Go on, get on the bed.” He nods to you and you shakily follow his order, laying down on the bed and opening your legs, rubbing at your throbbing core, watching as your alpha undresses himself. Jacket and work shirt, denim and union suit, they are all shed as you watch, touching yourself all the while.

He goes to climb into the bed with you as you catch a glimpse of his eyes - the faintest red rim around those blue pools.

You groan, a pained cry from your chest, and he stops immediately. Your heat has fully set in, and your body jolts in furious need. You sit up rapidly, trying to gain some semblance of control over yourself.

“I.. you… you begin to rut, there’s a chance-” you suck in a breath against the cramping pain, “I’ll take.”

Arthur hovers over you. “Is that what you want?”

A pained gasp is all you can reply.

“It hurts-” you moan, crumbling forward in the bed, clutching at your lower abdomen. Arthur’s large, warm hands find your sides immediately and gently push you to lay fully on your stomach.

“Hands and knees, let me take care of you.”

You breathe heavily, labored, through your mouth, your fever making you weak. You let him maneuver you however he wants, having lost the strength to do anything else. Your limbs are drawn under you, and your head presses heavily into the old pillow. He positions himself behind you, grabbing your hips and hoisting them up. You moan throatily into that pillow as he takes one hand to stroke his cock into full rigidity.

Before he presses inside, it hits you. You push up on your elbows and he stops, rubbing your lower back. You breathe out against another cramp that shudders through your body. “You… you’re gonna…”

All of the hotheadedness of being an alpha vanishes.

“Honey we don’t have to - it’s what you want.”

You swallow. He’s in position to mount you, the most base and primal of ways to slake this biological need. The complete and utter submission of an omega to their alpha.  Some say it’s an old wives tale, but omegas know - they are taught very early on, that being mounted was supposedly the best way to breed - the surest way to conceive a child. That if they were caught out in the world by an alpha, to fight like hell to not be mounted.

“What do you want, Arthur?”

He leans over you and you feel his lips on your shoulder as one of his hands gently grasps the crest of your hip.

“I wanna spend my days wit’ you.”

“That don’t answer the question.” You suck in another breath against the pain.

He pets your cunt gently, making you shiver as his knuckle parts your folds. “I’ll be happy either way. If you wanna spend our days ridin’ as partners or raisin’ children - I’ll be there as your mate.”

“And… and if I want…?” You gasp out against the pain, your slick starting to run down his knuckle all the way to his wrist, “If I want to have your child?”

He groans loudly and removes his hand from your cunt, immediately smearing your slick all over his cock and he pumps it vigorously. His opposite hand clamps hard on your hip, yanking you up to align with his swaying pelvis.

“Omega-” he growls, all predator, with the blunt head of his cock pressed against the seam of you, probing against the rim of your cunt, raring to plunge into your body, “I’ll breed you right, girl.”

His voice is rough, his tone warning. Another sway of his hips and his cockhead slips in, you do your part and press your hips back to take him, to urge him forward. You moan throatily into the pillow as he presses inside - somehow his cock feels bigger, thicker in this position than at any other time. 

“Fuck, darlin’.” Arthur curses when he’s fully sheathed inside you, hands strong on your hips. On his knees behind you, he guides you on and off of his cock as he thrusts his hips in tandem. The bed squeaks with the movement of your bodies. You clench the pillow hard as your lover picks up the pace, fucking into you frantically.

With each powerful thrust of him into you, you feel his knot start to grow, stretching you with a pain that you crave. If you were able to turn around and look up at him, you’d see his eyes rimmed in red. But you could tell, with the way his hands clamp on your hips, the hardness of his cock - you know he’s gone into rut.

He slows, breathing heavily through his nose, reminiscent of a beast of burden.

“Darlin’-” his voice is rough and thick with arousal, “Last chance, omega. D’ya want me to put a baby in you?”

You shudder, hissing at the finality of his implication as you feel the trickle down your neck from your mating gland of that sweet, pheromone-filled oil. 

“Yes.” You whine, “Yes, Arthur, let me - give me, ngh-” you throw your hips backward to spear yourself on his hard cock, “Breed me.”

“Fuck-” Arthur groans, and almost immediately, his knot swells, stretching the rim of your cunt as he locks himself into you. You whine against the pain-pleasure of it all.

Here you are, on your hands and knees, alpha mounting you, waiting for him to breed you - oh, what a place to be in - what a situation you thought you would never be in. Arthur quickly leans over you, plastering his chest over your back, his strong arms caging you in on either side of your own. It’s terrifyingly intimate as he breathes loudly through his nose, nipping at the gland on your neck.

The world slows. 

“I love you,” he rumbles into your ear, and gives one more thrust into you, knot keeping him snugly in your cunt, “I love you - I love you -” He babbles before sucking one final breath in.

Every nerve of yours is alight. You’ve never felt so in tune with your body. For one final instant, you shiver, your womb ready to accept. One final cramp of need, lower than ever, and you know it is the way your body sings for your mate. Your heart stops. Your cunt clenches at Arthur’s cock, as if it were begging for him the same way you shamelessly are.

Splayed over you, his lips quickly find your gland and he sucks, you gasp, and then you can feel it - deep in your body, you feel the warmth of his seed, his cock pulsing in your cunt as he fills you. 

The sound he makes is beautiful, a moan that transcends physical need. No, this was more. This was your mate, this was breeding, this was the pinnacle of what you were born for. This was creation. The swell of emotion overflows as tears burst from your eyes. You let out a crooning moan of your own as you take him, you take all of him, every pulse of him into your womb. 

The moment seems to last forever. Heaving, panting, groaning, Arthur empties himself into you, locked at the hilt, your body shaking at the sheer implication of it all. For once in your life, your omegahood was not a curse. Your alpha, bent over you, mounted and pumping his hot spend into you.

Arthur gasps like a fish out of water once he’s done. The roaring of your heart in your chest seems to overpower everything. You sob loudly and he immediately sobers and moves the two of you to lay on your sides on the bed, still locked at the hips. He brushes back a lock of your hair, “Honey, are you alri-?”

“I love you,” you cry out, taking his hand and pulling it to your breast, over your heart. “Arthur I love you, I need you - you’re everything-”

He settles in behind you, his knot still locked strong within your body.

“Honey darlin’ girl…” You can feel him smile into your hair, “Mate.”

All of the fierceness, the rough possession, it all has faded as Arthur gently nuzzles the back of your head.  You pull his hand down to your belly, right to the cradle of your hips, to splay out over your womb. “Our child - Arthur.”

He presses against your hot skin, arms wrapped tightly around you, and the next thing you know, that overwhelming warmth shoots through your cunt again as he breathes out heavily.

“Gonna make sure I give you one.” He groans, voice rough as he shallowly pumps his hips against your rear, another round of spend coating your insides.

You mewl, accepting him, rolling your hips as you make another noise of desperation.

“Y‘okay?” He asks, his arm tightening around you.

You whine, wiggling your hips, testing the strength of his knot. He growls in your ear, one of his hands shooting down to your cunt and forcing your legs apart and the other wound under your ribcage, engulfing and squeezing one of your breasts.

Arthur sucks in a breath and nuzzles the back of your neck. His hips jut forward once again, and his cock swells within you.

“Got one last one in me - gonna, gonna g-give you-“

Your entire body quivers in anticipation, and you grab Arthur’s hand from your breast and spread it over your lower belly, holding your hand over his. Over where you will grow and create and swell with child, his child.

“Give me a baby, Arthur-”

Arthur grunts, cock pulsing, and you mewl as you feel the bleeding warmness of him exit his body and enter yours. Gentle waves of him, dripping down and over his knot, smearing across both his and your thighs. A physical sign that he’s filled your cunt to the brim with his seed.

Finally, as the two of you breathe heavily from near-exhaustion, Arthur’s knot recedes enough that he is able to pull himself from you. Arthur slides himself from your body gently, and you whine as his inches leave you. He leans over you and kisses your temple. “I’ll get us some food. Get some rest.”

You turn over in the bed to face him, rubbing gently at your belly. You smile, mischievously.

“I like you mountin’ me.”

Arthur scowls at you, “Jesus Christ, you can’t just say that. We’ll never leave this bed if you keep acting like that.”

You simply smile, leaning in and taking his lips with yours, throwing your leg over his hip, preventing him from leaving the sanctity of the bed. One of his hands rounds your hip to cup your ass.

Shivering slightly, you involuntarily clench as you feel another trickle of his essence leak from your cunt. You look down between you, Arthur’s eyes following yours. You unwind your leg from his hip and turn to lie on your back. 

Your dark hair has lovely drips of white coursing through it, and Arthur groans quietly when he sees it. He reaches, collecting that viscous rivulet on his finger, and you watch intently as he looks back at you, raising his brow as he trails his finger through your thatch of hair.

He lovingly, gently presses it back in, and you whine with oversensitivity at the feeling of his thick trigger finger slipping through the sore rim of your cunt. Arthur takes your lips with his, smothering your complaint.

After several moments, he extracts his hand, leaning back on his elbow. He nuzzles against your neck, the now-faded ring left by his teeth those weeks ago.  “When will you know if you took?”

You shrug, “I guess when my heat ends. Never really paid attention much to them omega lessons…What happens now?”

Arthur rolls onto his back, stretching himself out in the bed, looking up at the moisture-stained ceiling of the rented room. “Things are endin’ with the gang. As much as it kills me to say it…”

You move closer to him, laying your head upon his chest. “And us…?”

“You’re my mate. You’re hopefully carrying my child. Ain't gonna make the mistakes I’ve made in the past.”

You fiddle with a strand of your long, messy hair. “I know we’re mates and all but…” you trail off, eyes trained on the strand of hair instead of him.

“Let’s get Swanson to marry us,” Arthur says, winding his arm around you again.

A smile blooms across your face and you immediately sit up and kiss him, hard, dragging him back down to the bed.

You awaken the next day in the mid-morning, when the sun is already high in the sky.  Arthur’s already up, sitting on the side of the bed, half-dressed. He looks back at you as you stretch your arms overhead. Yawning, you run your hands down your body to rest at the cradle of your hips.

A warmth blooms under your hand. You don’t know how to explain it, but you’re sure you took.

His large hand covers yours.

“Thinkin’ so?”

You nod, looking back at him, unable to stop yourself from smiling. You push yourself up and crash into his embrace.

“But you know, can never be too sure.” You giggle.

A spark of amusement shoots through those river-blue eyes of his.

“Get on your knees, omega. Let’s make sure.”

-

Months Later…

“Absolutely not.”

You frown, pouting reminiscent of a petulant child. You have to stop yourself from stomping your foot on the old wooden floor.

“Ain’t no way in hell am I mountin’ you when you're this close to giving birth.” Arthur scowls at you, looking you up and down with a set jaw and exasperated tone.

“C’monnn…” You tease, taking your hands and running them down your ribcage to highlight your quite large belly under the fabric of your dress.

“No. Christ, it’s hard enough not to go into rut when you’re just sleeping next to me.” Arthur shakes his head, turning away from you, trying to distract himself.

“Gentle?” You wind your way around him, your hand tracing up his back.

“Woman….” He gives a warning tone, but you can tell that you are wearing him down.

“Please, alpha.” You press yourself against him suggestively, taking one of his hands and placing it over the swell of your belly, “You need to take care of your omega.”

His fingers pulse over your skin, and with a sigh, he gives in, “I ain’t knotting you, no matter how much you beg. Christ, I shouldn’t even be entertainin’ this.”

With a giggle, your fingers fly to where his suspenders are fastened to his black work pants, and before he can even react, you have one unclipped. He snatches your hands away from his waist and holds them up above your head.

“You are the most troublesome-”

You lean up on your and kiss him, effectively silencing his retort. When you pull away, you smile up at him, and he cannot help but give the smallest smile back.

“Like I was sayin’, troublesome. C’mon now, get in bed.” Arthur playfully swats at your hip as you grab his hand, pulling him toward the bedroom.

The small cabin could use some updating - but for the soon-to-be three of you, the small homestead tucked away in the hills of Ambarino is exactly what you never knew you needed. A small bedroom, a bed tucked over in the corner, a fireplace, and an old, beaten-up dresser - for all the time you’d spent running, sleeping in tents and on bedrolls - having a home with your husband was something you’d never think you’d have.

As you reach the bed, he stops you and spins you around, holding you upright all the while. Arthur leans down and presses his lips against yours, one hand pulling at your dress, gathering up the skirts, bunching them up, raising them up, up to your hips. With an awkward shimmy with your belly hanging low, your bloomers pool to the floor with a quick tug from Arthur’s fingers.

“C’mon - lay down,” Arthur taps your hip and motions to the bed.

You raise your eyebrows as he undoes his other suspender, about to comment on how dressed the two of you still are.

“No-” he warns, “You take everythin’ off and I’m definitely knotting you. And we aren’t doin’ that.”

You’re about to complain again but are cut off as he pushes you, gently, down onto the bed before shoving his pants and short drawers down his saddle-hewn thighs.

At that sight, you quickly lay down, rolling onto your side as you hike your skirts up to bare your cunt.

“Thought so, troublesome.” Arthur jokes as he slides himself into bed behind you, the skin of his pelvis and cock warm against your rear. 

It takes some awkward maneuvering - everything is awkward when you are this far gone, but finally, he slowly presses himself into you, and you sigh in contentment.

It’s everything he is not to slam his hips into you, to knot you, to claim claim claim. But he needs to be soft, to be gentle, to be careful. 

You moan appreciatively when he gives a shallow pulse of his hips. The sheath of your body feels like a live wire - primed and ready to snap at any time. The pace he finds is slow, but full and heady. You mewl, your body shuddering as you come, and Arthur is forced to pull himself from you and wrap his hand around his cock, hissing as he feels his knot expand around nothing.

You struggle to turn yourself over, but finally do so and wrap your hand around his knot, joining his hand around that swollen base of him. He unclenches his jaw and looks down at you as you squeeze at him, moving your fingers from his hard knot up his shaft, and downward again.

“Sweetheart you don’t-” he grits out as you begin to pump him.

“Hush-” you interrupt as you lay your head upon his chest, twisting your hand around him as you stroke up and down. It doesn’t take long for him to find his own end. Arthur growls, thrusting his hips upward as he comes, spurting white out of the head of his cock over both of your hands.

After catching his breath, he kisses the crown of your head, “You okay?”

You look up and smile at him, satiated.

-

Arthur tosses the last of the firewood he’d been chopping all afternoon in the pile under the overhang, wiping the sweat from his brow as he lays the ax against the outside of the cabin. Grabbing the carbine that he had been cleaning earlier, he shoulders it as he pushes through the front door.

“Darl-”

The bedroom door is closed. Warily, he grabs the door handle and slowly opens it. Arthur stops completely, eyes widening as he scans the room. The whole atmosphere has changed from even this morning, and he slides the carbine from his shoulder and props it against the wall. 

It’s dark, the curtains drawn against the midafternoon sun. Before his eyes adjust to the darkness, he can just barely make out your form, leaning against the mantle, your head on your forearms.

He closes the door again, recreating the safety of the nest. He realizes that’s what it is only after shutting the door. A nest. 

“Is it-?”

You nod as pain rips through you and you groan, clutching your belly. Arthur is on you in an instant, holding you upright. 

Immediately, a fierce agitation in his blood sings. Protect, protect, protect.

You breathe out heavily through your nose as you stand up to full height again. “C’n you make a fire? I need… I need-”

“Anythin’, darlin’. Here, how about you sit down-”

“No, no I need to walk.”

For the next hours, you pace back and forth in the room, wincing every so often, one hand supporting your belly. You’ve kicked your shoes off, and Arthur has as well, sitting in a chair next to the fire, knee bouncing as he watches you intently. The warmth of the room is nearly suffocating to him, but he would never dream of asking to open the window or put out the fire. He simply rolls up the sleeves of his faded blue work shirt.

You suck in a pained breath and a groan echoes through the room as you double over, trying to assuage the overwhelming feeling in your hips.

“I- I think it’s time… h-help me get undressed and onto the bed.”

Arthur nods, stepping closer to you and reaching for the laces of your dress, pulling them apart and helping you step out of the fabric. He continues, solemnly, pushing the straps of your chemise down your shoulders. Gently, your chemise falls away, your bloomers puddle at your feet. Arthur’s blood is on fire as he can see the rivulet of liquid trail down your legs. Your breasts heavy and full, nipples darkened, your belly low. Your body heaving.

He is in awe. Not carnally - though he always wants you - he is in awe of you gritting your teeth against a wave of pain. He is in awe at the movement he sees in your belly. He is in awe of what is about to come, what you are about to do. You groan and reach for him. He immediately places his hands around your waist to steady you. You murmur softly as you lean into his embrace.

“Let’s get you to bed, darlin’ girl.” Arthur gently leads you to the bed and helps you lie down in it. You groan, trying to get comfortable, but it is a lost cause.

The hours continue to roll by, punctuated by your body seizing in agonizing pain every few minutes. You whimper to the ceiling, jumbled syllables of prayers, of curses, of his name.

He wants to growl, he wants to go outside and tear something to pieces. There is an overwhelming need to destroy as he watches you writhe in pain trying to bring his child into the world. He wants to fight another alpha - to dominate - to provide some kind of placation to the inferno in his chest.

Another pained, agonized whimper from you brings him back to reality.

“Si-sit me up,” You grit your teeth as Arthur helps you up, he sits at the head of the bed behind you and you lean back on him for strength. He will give you it all, he would give you anything to take this pain away, if only he could shoulder this task for you. You spread your legs a little further as your head falls back upon his shoulder, a wail crawling out of your throat. Slick trails down your neck from your mating gland as Arthur helps to hold you in a reclined position.

Spiced, warm, rich- with just a hint of the sweetness you usually smell like. It’s different, and instead of driving him wild with the need to rut, it’s making his heart pound with anxiousness and protectiveness. He’s sure if someone were to encroach on the area he would tear them to shreds with his bare hands right now.

“Doin’ so good.” He murmurs against your temple and you moan again in response, your head lolling forward as you hoarsely cry out.

“A-Arthur, its- it’s comin’, the baby-” You pant, and your hands move from clutching the bed sheets hanging between your legs.

“I’m here, I’m here.” Assurance is all he can do at the moment.  Blood begins to stain the sheet underneath you as you breathe heavily out your nose. Red smears your thighs as the end draws near. Your back tenses and your fingers clutch at his. Your nails dig into the back of his hand, but his pain be damned. Your head turns into his chest, squeezing your eyes shut, searching for some sort of comfort.

A rumble, deep and strong, claws up from his chest. His free hand spreads out over your belly, pulsing, cramping, hard - he can feel the ordeal your body is going through beneath his fingertips. Moments drag on as you breathe heavily through your nose.

With a gasp, you grab his hand from your belly and draw it down between your legs, against your cunt. Tears stream from your eyes as you wail loudly, the final moments having arrived. 

“Y’can do this, sweetheart, you’re doin’ so good-” He murmurs into your temple as you pant, another cry clawing up from your throat.

“Arthur-!”

Taking in a measured breath, you shudder in against him, a hoarse shout filling the room as you deliver the child. In a rush of blood and fluid, Arthur finds himself cupping the baby’s head as it slides into the world. A final scream pierces the room as you push again, the child’s shoulders and the rest of its body leaving you and into the waiting hands of its parents.

You immediately are lucid, and bring the child up to your chest, and the newborn’s piercing cry fills the room. The white-blue cord from the child’s belly pulses against your own, the blood connection between the two of you still strong. 

Arthur is struck dumb. He can barely comprehend what has just happened as you coo gently at the wailing babe, sticky and bloody. 

“L-lie us down, and get that linen blanket o’er there.” You whisper as you rub the child’s back, and its cries slowly quiet. He is jolted back to reality, and slowly, gently lies you down in the bed, standing up and grabbing the aforementioned blanket and bringing it back to you.

You’re able to wrap the babe loosely upon your chest and belly. You look up at Arthur, but his gaze is trained on the rough swaddled babe. The tufts of dark honeyed hair peaking out from the linen. Those blotchy red cheeks.

“Your son, my alpha.” You whisper.

Arthur gapes up at you, seemingly unable to comprehend your words, until something clicks and he immediately leans over and places his lips upon yours in a desperate, emotional kiss.

“Oh, sweetheart - you - you-”

You chuckle softly.

“You’re perfect, he’s perfect - my darlin’ omega girl.”

The child latches to your breast and begins to slowly suckle. The warm spice of your scent from giving birth recedes, and a sweetness replaces it. It’s new, this scent, the tang of milk and notes of comforting vanilla. Arthur breathes in deeply, resonating deep in his bones that you are no longer just his mate; you are mother to his child.

The boy’s scent - a combination of yours and his, invades his nostrils. Of sweet vanilla and leather. Of that tang of milk. He wants to nuzzle against the child and breathe in deep. The only scent he wants to be bathed in forevermore.

In those quiet moments after the ordeal of birth, you open the swaddled linen to give him access to cut the cord between you and the child, a quick flick of his hunting knife above the child’s abdomen. He holds you, kissing your temple and murmuring sweet nothings as you clutch at the child, delivering the afterbirth with a soft, stifled whine of pain.

Things start to slow. He’s got a new purpose now. As you drift to sleep, cleaned and in a new chemise, upon fresh sheets, his gaze moves to the basket next to the bed, where in a fresh swaddle of linen, his son also sleeps.

It's murderous, the things he would do to protect the two of you. This nest, the newborn child, and you recovering from birth. His blood sings- not in the need to fuck, but in the solemn duty he now has - as alpha, as husband, as father. It's fierce, the protectiveness he now feels. Like a snarling wolf defending territory. Alpha, protector. Head of the family.

He sits down in the chair opposite the bed, carbine in reach, beginning his watch.  The watch that would consume him for the rest of his life. 

But he’s content with this new calling. 

[6ix9inewiturmom]

The Scare- Chris Sturniolo

Summary: you end up having one of the biggest pregnancy scares of your life while chris is in boston

Warnings: Cursing, Crying, use of Y/N, talks of sex, taking a pregnancy test

A/n: may be tmi but lowkey relate to this so this was easy to write LMFAOO, ENJOY

PSA: DO NOT USE MY WORK FOR “inspiration” OR ANYTHING ELSE!!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Chris has been in Boston for the last 2 weeks, and he's finally coming home. I decided to shower and shave before he came home because that man is the most sexually active 20-year-old I've ever met, the Facetime sex at 3 am for him isn't nearly enough to satisfy both of our needs.

After my hour-long shower, I'm digging through my shared bathroom with Chris in an attempt to find my body lotion to prevent my dry ass skin in this heat when I find my box of tampons, which got me thinking I haven't had a period in a while and Chris and I aren't the safest people when it comes to sex because neither of us can even remember to put a condom on, it always fucks up my mood.

“Shit,” I say to my self.

Chris and I are only 20 and with his career there's no fucking way in HELL we can have a kid or even raise a kid, I am nowhere near ready to raise an actual child.

I open my Flo app and see the little circle that's normally red is grey ‘1 week late’

“Shit shit shit,” I say out loud again, panicking.

I can't keep it from him, he's gonna see the pregnancy test in the trash. Would he be mad if I kept it from him? Should I just tell him? Should I go to Tara?

After about 30 minutes of standing in the bathroom looking at the message in my phone, panicking about what to do, I just decided I was gonna tell Chris, he loves me, and we've talked about having kids way later in life anyway, he couldn't be mad.

I finally built up the courage and got dressed in a pair of tight ripped jeans and a baby tee, with some Converse, and sat on the couch waiting for Chris to come home going through Tiktok and whatever else was on my phone.

“BABY IM HOME” Chris yells from the stairs

I squeal in excitement as I spot Chris and run towards him. Jumping into his arms, he effortlessly lifts me, allowing me to wrap my legs around his waist.

“Umm Y/N there are other people here too you know? Also, Chris get out of the fucking way so we can fucking put our shit down” Nick says in annoyance.

“Well hello to you too Nick,” I say jumping out of Chris’ arms moving out of the doorway, and letting Matt and Nick come inside the house.

“Sorry babes, we've all been up since about 6 am Boston time trying to catch our flight we almost missed because your fucking boyfriend wouldn't get the hell out of bed” Nick replies sending me a soft smile and giving me a soft hug.

“To be fair none of us went to bed at a decent time, mom was making sure we had everything packed so we didn't leave anything behind” matt defends.

“Thank you, Matt, now Y/N do you wanna take a nap? I know we were gonna go out to dinner but I'm very fucking jet lagged and kinda just want to order dinner and watch movies with you” Chris wraps his arms around my waist nuzzling his head between my neck as my hands rest on his shoulders.

“Thats fine with me i don't mind” i pull away from his embrace and smile at him.

Chris grabs his luggage and my hand and guides me to our shared bedroom. As we enter the room he seats his luggage down and plops on the bed letting out a groan of frustration.

“I have missed this damn bed, don't ask me how I slept in that bed at my mom's house for god knows how long because this one is so much more comfortable,” Chris says adjusting the way he's laying to rest his head down on the pillows. “Now after 2 weeks of no sex and just my right hand, I'm gonna need to fuck the ever-loving shit out of you” he smirks at me patting his lap and signaling me to sit on it.

“Yeah so about that” give him an awkward smile “So I didn't know how to approach this to you, 'cause you know we're not the most responsible sexually active humans” I start babbling getting nervous of his reaction based on the puzzled look on his face.

“Y/N what the hell are you getting at? cause if you don’t wanna have sex with me right now that’s fine just say that, but considering our last facetime call the constant ‘oh chris i need your cock’ was really misleading to me” he says with a puzzled faced.

“Chris i’m late” i breathe out.

“late for what? did we have reservations for dinner? did you have something for work?” he says with frustration in his voice.

“No Chris my period, I'm late, my period is LATE, I'm 1 week late today,” I say aggressively from his lack of acknowledgement.

“wait we haven’t had sex in 2 weeks? i’m confused” he sits up moving to the edge of the bed.

“last time we had sex i was ovulating, remember when i told you like a while ago that if im ovulating means im FERTILE?” i say in frustration.

“Fuck” he runs his fingers through his hair “Did you take a test? Do you know for sure that you are pregnant?” he questions

“No, and no, I didn't wanna take a test without you, and I for SURE didn't wanna hide it from you,” I say softly sitting next to him on the bed.

“So why the hell are you freaking out now? You don't know for sure that you are” he asks placing his head in his hands.

“Because you and I are nowhere near ready for a fucking kid Chris, your career, and my inability to even fucking care for myself some days, yeah there's no fucking way I can care for a child who can't even speak on its emotions, Chris” I stand up out of frustration and start pacing.

I can tell Chris obviously got upset with my statement about our ability to care for a child but i was stressed and honestly wasn't thinking.

"I want you to know that I care about you deeply, Y/N. If you are indeed pregnant, please know that I will do everything in my power to support you and our child. Even if it means giving up my career, I will do it willingly. Let's go get a pregnancy test and we can talk about everything else later, okay? I am here for you, and I will always be." he says, his voice filled with empathy and understanding as he gently cups my cheeks in his hands, rubbing them softly up and down and warm smile spreads across his face.

As our eyes meet, a warm smile spreads across his face and I can't help but return it. He takes my hand in his and gently guides me towards the living room, his grip firm yet gentle. The coolness of his skin against mine sends shivers down my spine.

“Girl, were you guys arguing? Normally after we come home from Boston it's all ��Oh Chris more, more’ typically a traumatic event” Nick says mocking me with a smile plastered across his face.

“Y/N and I are running to CVS so well be back in a little,” Chris says walking him and me down the stairs and to my car.

The drive to CVS was filled with a bunch of conversations and laughter, talking about if I was pregnant how we would raise our child, and Chris talking about the dad jokes he's gonna have, and considering he's a triplet he carries the genetic that I'm probably gonna twins or triplets.

“How many of these things do we need? What brand is best? why are there so many options?” Chris says holding 3 boxes of pregnancy tests and struggling to figure out which one to pick “fuck it why don't we buy all of them and use one pack tonight then we'll have the extra on hand in case our irresponsibility gets the best of us” he continues.

Chris and I walked up to the front counter and dropped the boxes of tests. The worker behind the counter took a look at the tests and then looked back at us, giving us a fake smile. After ringing up the purchase, we made our way to my car.

“So do you think you are pregnant?” Chris says breaking the silence.

“I mean normally my cycles are normal and a week late is not normal at all but it could be my hormones changing or something, but I do wanna make sure,” I say glancing at Chris nervously biting his nails.

“You were right about how irresponsible we are with our sex lives but when we first started fucking we knew the risk of everything and I mean our kids would be pretty cute,” he says placing his hand on my leg and rubbing a small circle with his thumb.

Chris and I pulled up into the driveway. As we got out of the car, he held my hand tightly and carried the CVS bag in the other hand as we made our way into the house and up the staircase.

“did you get any snacks?” Nick says eating a bowl of popcorn on the couch with Matt watching the most random movie on Netflix.

“Uhm no I just got a couple of personal things” I say nervously holding up the bag and sending a warm smile to Nick.

Chris and I pretty much B lined to the bathroom, anxiously “So which one do we use?” Chris says looking down at the boxes.

“Just give me the one that says Clearblue” i say softly laughing as Chris opens the box for me and inspects it before handing me the little stick.

“Do you want me to hold the stick while you piss? I'm sorry I have no idea how these things work” he says laughing allowing his back to slide down the wall and sit with his back against the shower door.

“Chris it's fine i know how to use these, believe me my friends in highschool weren't the most responsible either” I say laughing beginning to pee on the little white and blue stick.

“So how long do we wait?” Chris says helping me take a seat on the floor next to him.

“5 minutes” I breathe out setting a 5-minute timer on my phone and leaning my head against the shower door.

As we sat in the bathroom, waiting for the pregnancy test to show its result, the silence felt palpable. It wasn't an awkward silence, but rather a deafening one that seemed to fill the entire room. With just the two of us present, we anxiously waited for the five minutes to pass.

“Would it be a bad thing if I wanted it to be positive?” Chris chuckles.

“I wouldn't necessarily say a bad thing, there's a part of me that kind of wants it to be positive too” i smile back at Chris.

The alarm on my phone quickly broke the once-loving moment sending us into a panic. Chris and I stand up walking to the counter.

“Wait should we film it in case you are then we could always have it if you could be pregnant?” Chris’ gaze softens as he looks at me.

“Chris not the time” I softly laugh out.

“Right,” he nods smiling back at me. “WAIT” he grabs my hand “Whatever happens, I love you,” he says in a serious tone.

With a warm smile, I gaze lovingly at him and reciprocate his affectionate words, "I love you too Christopher." However, my attention is quickly drawn towards the counter where the pregnancy test lays face down, taunting my nerves. With trembling hands, I muster up the courage to pick it up and slowly turn it around to face me, my heart pounding in anticipation of the result.

‘Not Pregnant’

“YES, MORE CREAMPIES” Chris shrieks wrapping his arms around my waist and picking me up, and spinning me around as I giggle out of excitement.

He carefully seats me down back flat on my feet. Our moment was quickly interrupted by both Nick and Matt barging through the door.

“ARE YOU GUYS- wait is that a pregnancy test? Y/N ARE YOU PREGNANT?” Nick yelled as Matt's eyes widened at the little blue stick in my hands.

“Please for the love of god, I don't want a little Chris running around, or two, or even three” Matt places his hand on his forehead.

“No she is not” Chris chuckles at the boys’ comment.

“THANK YOU,” matt and nick say in unison.

“Wrap it before you tap it next time Chris,” Nick says walking away and back to the living room.

“Now I'll say it again, after 2 weeks of Facetime sex I would like to absolutely fuck your brains out” Chris says smirking down at me.

“Please do” I smile as he picks me up gripping the backs of my thighs as my legs wrap around his waist leading me to the bedroom.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

A/N pt 2: I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THISSSSSS AND TYSM TO @cosmicmistake42069 FOR THIS INSPIRATION!!

[thelov3lybookworm]

Caged In (sequel? epilogue?)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

Summary: Nyx gets spooked by his lovely uncle

•○●⛦●○•

Word Count: 712

Warnings: tis just crack lol

A/n: based on this request i got like over a year ago🥲. sorry for the long wait pookie, this sequel is finally here 🥹

anyways, ENJOY🥹

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

Even after over sixty years of being high lady of day court, there were days Y/n would just sit and wonder.

How did I get so blessed?

What did I do in my past that led to the mother being so loving to me?

Having a loving husband, an adorable daughter that grew up too quickly, a court that doted on her and her family, was nothing short of the biggest blessing to be bestowed on any kind.

And then Cassian ran past, hooting and chasing his youngest, and Y/n sighed. Maybe this was the reason the mother decided to give Y/n so much, for tolerating her older brother causing havoc everywhere.

"Cassian, careful!" Feyre called, a smile on her face.

Y/n shook her head. "Nyx is so much more mature than my older brother."

Feyre laughed. "That he is."

"He is my ass."

Y/n blinked, surprised at the sudden harsh words, and turned to look at her husband who appeared in the doorway, fuming, his eyes filled with rage.

"Lucien?"

He stomped over. "Do you have any idea what he is doing right now?" Y/n glanced at Feyre, then shook her head. "And do you know where Astrid is?"

Y/n blinked, her lips lifting in a hopeful smile as Feyre stood. "Are they together right now?"

Lucien scoffed. "More than right now, it seems."

Feyre squealed, grabbing Y/n’s hand and dragging her along. Lucien followed, still grumbling. But he did tell them where the two were when asked.

The whole journey towards the first floor gardens seemed to pass in a blur as soon, the three were sneaking glances inside.

There, in the middle of the garden, sat Nyx and Astrid, entirely too close to be platonic, giggling together. Nyx leaned in, tucking a small pink flower behind Y/n and Lucien's daughter's ear, his lips spread in a loving smile.

Feyre shot Y/n a giddy look, but it was soon gone as Lucien decided to intrude on the kids' moment.

"What is going on here?"

Y/n turned to glare, but Lucien moved towards where Nyx hurried to stand without a glance at Y/n. Nyx glanced behind Lucien, his cheeks turning red when he realised his mother was here too.

"Uncle Lucien- I- I can explain-"

Lucien growled low in his throat, his eyes wild. Y/n wondered if she should interfere. Lucien was always calm, thinking his actions through before acting on them, but him being mad enough to growl at the boy he loved so much was concerning.

She had taken a step forward to stop Lucien when Astrid hurried up to her, grabbing her arm, eyes filled with tears. "Mama- I’m sorry-"

Y/n placed her hand on her daughter’s, shushing her. "I’m so happy, sweetheart. And I know your dad will be too, don’t worry."

"I swear to the mother Nyx, you hurt my baby, you will be buried before you can think, your father’s wrath be damned."

Y/n turned her head, eyes widening.

Nyx had sense enough to look apologetic. "I won’t, uncle, you know it."

AStrid sniffled, her eyes fixed on her father. It was that small sound that made Lucien turn, his eyes going soft at the sight of his daughter. He hurried over, Nyx forgotten just like that the moment he realised his daughter had tears in her eyes. "Hey, I’m sorry. Was I too mean?"

Y/n glanced at Feyre, who looked ready to burst out laughing at the spooked look on Nyx’s face.

"I’m so sorry dad, I"

He scoffed, pulling Astrid in for a hug, caressing her hair. "What do you think I am? Some territorial bat? I am not mad that you’ve got a lover. I am just warning him to not mess with you."

Astrid looked up at Lucien. "You’re not mad?"

He gave her an incredulous look. "I did way worse at your age. I don’t have the right to get mad. But just know, if he hurts you, you tell me and we’ll dig his grave together."

She giggled, snuggling into her father’s embrace.

And everyone was happy, smiling and laughing.

Well, except for Nyx, of course. The poor boy almost peed his pants.

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

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[hx4x4enthusiast]

Two sparks and a drumming heart

Part 2 (1560 words)

Part 1

Ship: Optimus x gender-neutral reader x Ratchet

Fic category: hurt/comfort

Trigger Warning: Self-Harm, Depression, mention of past suicide attempt,

“Speech”

-Commlink conversation-

kursiv=thought

Warmth covered my sore body and a gentle humming, greeted me as I slowly arose out of my sleep. Trying to wake up, as my still sleepy brain tries to piece together where I am and what happened. My inner thoughts get interrupted by a yawn, as I stretch myself, sit up and drowsily look around me. Looking around, I am greeted with the sight of a dark and seemingly empty room. Confused on how I got here, I realize that I sit on something, the same something I apparently slept on. My hands touch the comfortable warm surface, and it feels like several warm metal plate. Squinting my eyes, I spot two big masses, one on my right the other on my left. Letting my eyes drift over them two pairs of blue orbs greet me.

 “Woah what the hell.”

“It seems our little troublemaker is awake, Optimus.”

 One of the voices rumbles and it takes me a moment to realize that the big mass on my right is Ratchet.

 “Huh Ratchet?”

“Yes, that would be my designation.”

“Where am I, what happened, who is…”

 A yawn yet again interrupted my sentence. Ready to continue I was abruptly blinded by a bright light. I squirmed trying to hide back in the warm little cave I awoke in. That caused two deep rumbles to sound through the room. My little sleep cave was broken apart and I found myself lifted, blinking my eyes repeatedly helped adjusting to the bright light and I saw Ratchet lying on his helm propped up by one of his servos looking at me. Confused I turned around, only to be greeted by the sight of a red chest with big front windows. Craning my neck, I am met with the leader of the autobots himself gently looking down on me.

  “Good morning little archivist, I hope you had a peaceful recharge.”

“Huh uh yes I think so?”

“Well, that was an intelligent answer.”

“Ratchet, I love you but please shut up I am really not a morning person.”

“While I understand humans are, sensitive in the morning please do refrain from using unnecessary language, dear.”

“Ok, I am sorry Optimus.”

 The prime nodded contend with the answer given by the human in his palm. Before growing concerned looking to his conjux.

 -Ratchet, I fear our little archivist is going to remember soon what transpired yesterday.-

-I am aware Optimus, I have sedative on the ready they won’t send them to sleep but calm them down, do we can talk to them, tough I would like to use that as a last resort.-

-I understand. We can only hope that the “spark sound” as Miko called it, is enough to keep our little archivist calm.-

 Said human rearranged their sitting position. A sudden thought crossing his mind.

 “Hey guys, quick question, not that I didn’t enjoy sleeping here, cause like hands down, best sleep I had in a long time. But like how did I end up here and more importantly why am I here anyway.”

 I raked my brain trying to remember what happened yesterday, but my brain was freaking useless in the morning. Goddamit, I need coffee, with milk. Rubbing my temples, I start to remember feeling exhausted, both mentally and physically, yesterday. But the question is why? Looking up I see Ratchet and Optimus exchanging glance between each other and me. Like I am about to do run away or hurt myself. My thoughts come to an abrupt stop, memories of what happened yesterday flood my brain. A horrified expression overtakes my facial expression, I look up to Optimus and Ratchet slapping a hand over my mouth.

 Tears started streaming down my face as I realize what happened yesterday. Two pairs of arms gently circle around my body, giving me Anchor points, to ground myself. The embrace was gentle yet firm, helping me ease my anxiety. The mechs had mass displaced to be closer to me.

 “Shh, little spark, we are not mad at you.”

“You handled the situation as best as you could in that moment, there lies no fault in that.”

“You are strong, but you must be exhausted. You have been strong for a long time.”

“But you are safe now little archivist. We swore to protect you, be that from the Decepticons or the demons of your mind. That still holds true, know you’re not alone little spark.”

“Yes, I am. Everyone I care about always fucking leaves. I give so much, and I am so bloody tired of it. I make sure everyone eats and drinks enough, help with small injuries, listen when someone has a problem. But it is never enough people still leave. And when I trust someone enough to let them see the real me, to see that all of this is just a broken worthless fucking mess, they leave and I am left alone, having to put myself together again. I have managed to get through my entire life, I can take care of myself. Cause God forbit I am not able to meet the requirements set for me. So don’t you dare pretend that you care. “

 After basically pouring my heart out, I level Optimus with a heated glare. Screaming, defensive statements, judgemental and condescending speeches. That’s what I expected, that’s what always happen. I am a spoiled brat, I have an attitude problem, stop wailing I can’t understand you. Those are the things I hear every time I pour my heart out.

One servo reaches around my upper back and the other under my legs, and I am gently lifted into a big warm chassis. My head is just above Optimus spark chamber and I hear the gentle humming of his spark. Confused I just let Optimus do what he, well currently does. Ratchet carefully approaches me like one would a scared animal. Looking down on my hand and back up into my eyes, silently asking for permission to hold my hands. I nod and gently Ratchet takes my hands in his servos and holds them.

 “I apologise.”

 Wait did, did Optimus just apologise to me why, he didn’t do anything wrong, I screamed at him. I did something wrong I am the problem. Why aren’t they screaming at me why are they so gentle? This is not how this is supposed to go why aren’t they following the script.

 “We never wanted to make you feel like you needed to shoulder all of these Problems alone, little archivist.”

“What Optimus says holds truth, you were always there so we unintentionally always put all burdens on you. But you are still young, you shouldn’t have to shoulder everyone’s burdens and yours atop of that, alone.”

 I blinked switching between looking at Optimus and Ratchet. Both noticed my looks and gazed at me equally confused.

 “Hu, what.”

“Is everything alright, little spark?”

“Did we say something wrong?”

“You’re not following the script.”

 I mumbled not even realizing I said my thoughts out loud. It was Ratchets and Optimus time to look at me confused. This time Ratchet started speaking in a confused tone.

 “What script, little one?”

“You are not mad at me? You’re not gonna scream at me? Telling me that I am a cry-baby?”

“What? By Primus no who would do something like that. Emotional reaction no matter their nature a natural occurrence. Why would we or anyone berate you for that.”

 Ratchet huffed out unable to understand why anyone would say such harmful things. As a medic he was well aware that words can have an immense influence on a patient’s mental stability.

 “Little archivist, did you expected us to follow a certain pattern, and through our action we didn’t follow your expected script and now you are unsure on how to proceed and what to expect.”

 Optimus asked in a gentle tone, hitting the nail on the head. All I could do was nod.

 “I see. You can be sure that we will listen to you without judgement and help so that you may feel safe. We will not leave you alone.”

“Yeah, your stuck now with a self-sacrificing leader and a grumpy medic, little spark.”

 That caused a giggle to escape me, hearing Ratchet refer to himself as grumpy was pretty funny. Looking up again I am met with the gentle and relieved expressions on the two mechs faceplates.

 “Little archivist, we are aware that this is a lot to ask of you, but could you promise us something?”

“Come to us with your problems, we know that this is not easy, and we don’t expect you to immediately put all your trust in us. But maybe with small steps we get there.”

“If you have any thoughts or maybe already wounds from self-harm, please do come to one of us. You don’t need to say anything, just coming to us is appreciated.”

“I… I will try. I can… can’t make a… any promi…. promises but I will at least try.

“Thank you dear, that’s all we ask for.”

Masterlist

 Ratchet comes closer and I find myself yet again in a warm hug. Tough this time without any fear or hurt. I think for the first-time things may be alright, maybe I can finally trust someone. Though one thought sticks, I will not be alone anymore.

[justmightyshadows]

Jaheira Confesses BG3 Fic Feb Day 3

This is my day 3 (I am not even trying to keep up). You can see the prompts here. This is #21 SFW . This is part one and part two is here.

This one is RATED T

I would say SFW but they're in a bath so you'll be filling in some blanks.

Thiramen - love(elvish)

The bath water was hot, steam whipped off the surface into the cold air of the night as you had the windows open to let in the sweet smell of fresh air along with a gentle breeze. You slide down until reaches just under your chin and lean back to wet the top of your scalp and hair. There is a stillness where the water surrounds your ears and leaves you floating almost inside its warm embrace. Jaheira approached you quietly, shedding her clothes and lowering herself opposite you. The small waves cause you to open your eyes and investigate.

You take in the woman before you - her silvery hair uncharacteristically without braids, her body is scarred and worn from battle as she sits with her arms atop the edge of the bath staring at you. “I thought you had already gone to bed, veluthe* (beautiful-elvish)” You say throwing out a compliment you are sure will get under her skin but instead of shooting you down she smiles “I would not be able to rest until I saw you. Not after the battle today.” You had just returned from saving Minsc. Jaheira had shed tears of relief once he was safe in camp but pushed you away once you had tried to comfort her. You had made your way to the bath and she, you figured, was fast asleep.

“A great day, why does the battle leave you so unsure as to stay awake?” You wonder if she is ready to talk about all of this, moving forward like this could cause her to become upset but there really isn’t much else to talk about. “Let me braid your hair for the night, come here.” She changes the subject so abruptly it takes you by surprise but soon you are swishing backwards towards her. You come to rest against her thighs as she kneels to get to the top of your hair. She takes her time cleaning, combing and braiding the long locks into a single braid that she rests gently on your shoulder. “I owe you thanks - for saving Minsc, for listening to a mad woman like me and for standing up to the Emperor. None of it was easy, or wise but I am grateful nonetheless.” She presses against you and leaves a kiss against your exposed shoulders the skin rising in goosebumps as she releases. “Are you getting soft on me High Harper?” You say leaning back to catch her face throw back for a full laugh. “I am trying to be serious for once and this is how you repay me. Next time I’ll let the deed go without thanks. Duly noted.” She sighs as you turn around. “You’re welcome, Jaheira. You know that I think you were worth all of the headaches.” You respond sensing her frustration. She stares at you - before she speaks again. “It is more than that, I do not say this lightly. We have more than just a friendly bond, it is something I have not felt in a long time.” Her arms wrap around your neck pulling you close and into the water, warming you. “Tell me now if you do not feel the same but I believe you do. We have shared a bed, a blade and now a journey. I want you by my side whatever comes next, I don’t want the regret of waiting for the right time, whatever that means.” She leans in without waiting for your reply pressing her lips against yours and gently biting against your bottom lip, when she releases you whimper slightly and place your hands around her gently. “Is this is your way of saying you love me?”

She glares and pulls you forward by the hips - splashing water over the sides of the bath “If I have to spell it out for you then yes - I love you.” Her eyes are fierce and expectant “I love you too Jaheira” you respond. She stands - the water sliding down her body as she exits the bath.

“Good, I would look rather foolish if you had said no. Now come, we can pour affection on each other in the bed. I’m getting even more wrinkles sitting in the bath for so long.” She towels off in front of you, slowly caressing each spot before she heads into the bedroom without looking back at you.

Pt 2 will be NSFW Prompt #10 ;)

[emmy-dekarios-bg3]

Heart of the Weave - chapter 37

I’m not worried about the three trying to kill me, because let’s face it, they can’t. I’m worried that the world will go under complete destruction again, only much worse than before. The good news is that none of them have a soul left to sell to the devils, so they probably won’t get very far. Probably. What could be the next big threat? Worst case scenario, their gods can’t find anyone worthy enough to replace them and they all rise from their graves. Best case? Well, the best case is that the worst case won’t happen.

“If you see them again, tell us. Please.” I can tell Karlach is trying to hold in her hatred for Gortash, trying to prevent herself from losing control from the madness. I smile at her and nod in agreement; I couldn’t keep an issue as gigantic as this one away from our closest friends, especially if their lives might be on the line. In fact, other than Gale, Karlach and Wyll would be the first to know, mostly because they’ve both had dealings with Gortash in horrible circumstances.

Time to enjoy the remainder of my day and not allow the situation from this morning trigger any negative feelings. As I’m washing the freshly picked vegetables to prepare for tonight’s dinner, I feel Gale’s arms wrap around me from behind. He had just put Jenevelle down on the mat to lie on her belly and ‘play’ with her baby toys.

“I am so sorry for earlier. I think I was just thrown off by the unforeseen dire circumstances once again thrown our way. We had a solid two years of no unhinged shenanigans and then out of the blue, this happens. I appreciate you and everything you do for us, my love. You truly are the treasure I have searched for my entire life,” he murmurs in my ear, causing goosebumps to scatter across every inch of my flesh. Those were the words I needed to hear more than anything right now. My heart skips a beat as I feel his loving aura embrace me, feeling butterflies on a rampage within my stomach as if we had just met all over again.

“Thank you. I love you so much, Gale.”

“And I love you, more than words will ever be able to express.”

I finish washing the vegetables off with the fresh well water and chop them up, ready to prepare a fulfilling feast. Venison, squash, and sweet potatoes for dinner? Yes please! Plus, it’s Gale’s favorite meal I make. He used to be the cook, until we moved in together; and I have so much fun doing it. As I prepare our meal, I watch Gale play with our precious little baby, both of them just smiling and enjoying each other’s company.

Once seated at the dinner table, we begin to eat the delicious food and I realize tomorrow is the first day back from summer vacation; meaning Gale has to teach at the academy. Luckily, only four hours a day, so it won’t be too terrible.

“I hope you, Jenevelle, and Tara have a peaceful day while I’m gone tomorrow. Maybe you can go enjoy the markets downtown or see Shadowheart, perhaps. I’m sure she would love to see you.” He’s right. I probably should go check up on her to see how she’s doing, plus give her some adult interaction that isn’t Astarion. I haven’t seen or spoken to her since her wedding day.

“And I hope your day of teaching tomorrow will be nothing short of successful. I bet your students have missed you. We shall see what the day holds, hm?” He smiles as he takes a bite of the freshly cooked venison, steaming with an aroma that triggers the desire to devour it. Juicy, thick, luscious.

After putting Jenevelle to bed, Gale and I attend to our own bedroom to embrace the night under the covers. I lie on the bed, completely nude as I wait for him to join me. I pat the empty space next to me as I watch him strip down of his clothing.

“Come here,” I mutter. My voice is soft and quiet as I beg for his body next to mine. He smiles, climbing on top of the bed, but I reach my arms out for him to kiss me and groan.

“Does my beloved lady want a kiss?” I nod, biting my bottom lip. He leans in and places his plump lips on mine, our flesh intertwining as he keeps them there for a moment. I feel his soft fingers stroke my hair, brushing individual strands out of my face and behind my ear, relaxing me. When our lips unlock, his gaze is deep within my brown eyes, holding my stare and making me fall deeper in love with him.

“Thank you for your comfort, it’s what I needed,” I murmur amorously as he continues to hold me. “Your love makes me feel whole. Please don’t ever change, I love you for who you are, and always have.” He rolls off to the side, curled up next to me as we pull the comforters over our bodies.

“You have no idea how good it feels to hear those words. I’ve finally accepted that being my raw, authentic self is good enough as is, because of you.”

While we’re in bed, I realize I didn’t feel the disturbing presence this time, nor have I seen the three horrendous villains like I did before. I actually feel at peace. It helps tremendously that Gale is holding me in his arms as we drift into a heavy slumber. I don’t want to jinx it in any way, though, so I just keep my mouth shut and close my eyes, feeling the warmth of Gale’s skin radiate off his body as it touches mine.

When morning arrives, I wake up with Gale so Jenevelle and I can wish him a good day of teaching at the academy. I hold our daughter and use her hand to wave at Gale as he walks out the door for his first day back at work.

“Bye Daddy,” I say, pretending to be Jenevelle. He chuckles, waving at us as he steps out the doorway.

“Bye, my loves. See you at lunch time.” He closes the door behind him and I take a deep breath, hoping for at least a semi-normal day that doesn’t involve strange visions or unexpected news. I look at Jenevelle as I hold her dear, smiling and trying to stay positive for the day ahead of us.

“Well, my darling, let’s get some housework done and I’ll take you for a stroll around Waterdeep. Maybe we can see Shadowheart and the baby Asher. Okay, and Astarion. Who knows what they’ve been up to? It’s been awhile.”

Our morning consists of the following routine: feed her a bottle, change her, do some laundry, prepare lunch for when Gale gets home, another bottle, and water the garden. Though it sounds tedious, I actually rather enjoy keeping the tower tidy, especially after all the months of chaotic adventuring. It makes me feel like I have life together now. As Jenevelle finishes her final bottle before Gale gets home, I hear a loud knock at the door that startles me like no other, which is odd because we don’t often get visitors that aren’t our friends. Not even Karlach knocks this loud.

“Heavens! Could they knock any louder?” Tara exclaims. “If I were wearing boots, they would’ve fallen off my body from how high I jumped!”

“Who is it?” I shout, hoping they hear me. No answer, nor were there any other knocks following this one. Curious, I strut towards the front door and open it, noticing no one is here. I do see a medium sized package waiting for me on the doorstep, however. I place Jenevelle on her play mat so I may lift the package, noticing it’s a little heavier than I expected. I place it on the floor as I sit down next to my daughter, preparing to open it. “From Mother” it reads. As I open it, I notice a fairly large book and a letter attached to it, which is an unusual gift, especially from my mother.

“Best to read the letter first,” Tara suggests.

“You’re right. Here it goes.”

‘My Darling Emmy,

I miss you so much dear, and your beloved family you’ve started. I hope to see my grand-baby sometime soon. I’m so sorry I have been absent and I really wish I was in touch with you more often. There is something of vital importance you need to know, and I wanted to find the right way and time to discuss it with you. I was sworn to an oath but it’s been eating me alive, my daughter.

Please know I have kept some secrets from you, and you deserve to know the cold truth. I kept these a secret for your safety, my love. To start, many of your memories were wiped out by Shar. I confessed everything at a Sȇlunite temple and…well, my words were heard somehow, and reported to Gortash.

Emmy, there is no easy way to tell you this, but Gortash is your father. Your biological father. I’m not sure if you already knew, but his parents sold his soul when he was a child, causing him to become corrupted. He wasn’t always like this. For years, he fought the corruption brought to him, especially when he met me. Him and I were happy for so long, a long time ago, until power became his true love. It found him once again. I didn’t want that life, so I ran away, not realizing I was pregnant at the time. I took off and met your stepdad. I told him everything. God… I never told you the truth as you were growing up, because you and your stepdad became so close. You didn’t need that information following you for life. Gortash has tried to find out for years where I was hiding, and, well, he recently found me. He knows now that you’re his daughter and he will try to be in contact with you. Yes, even though he’s dead, but not for long.

One last bit of crucial information you must know is that you also have a brother out there. A half-brother, a spawn of Gortash. I don’t know much about him at all.

I am so sorry this is all being revealed right now. I thought that since Gortash was dead, I’d never have to tell you. I saw him. He communicated with me. He’s been given one more chance to live thanks to his bastard of a God, Bane. I wanted you to be fully prepared in case you do come across him once again. Plus, you needed to know the truth. I love you. Please do not hate me. I’m so sorry. I hope to see you soon.

Love,

Mom.’

[super-predictable98]

The Galaxies of Gallifrey

Chapter 1: The Toymaker Trick

Word Count: 1,8 k

Warning: Mention of death, SPOILERS FOR THE GIGGLE

a/n: Hey there! So because I didn't have enough unfinished series... here's another one. I hope all the whovians can enjoy this canon x OC thing I'm working on. There's a lot more to come for this one, but before chapter 2 comes expect a Casanova request XD

2008 - Somewhere in space

"Gallifrey Gale McShane... can I have this dance?" The Doctor extended his hand and she took it. 

"What was that song from the future? Oh! I got it," she pressed a button on her phone and Mitski started playing. 

The two of them embraced each other sweetly, swaying gently around the TARDIS control room. 

"You know I... I... you know," he mumbled, still not quite ready to say the words he felt in his hearts.

"I know, and I do too," Gallifrey whispered. 

"Good, then we're in agreement. I wouldn't be the man I am today without you, our lives have been intertwined forever now." 

She nodded and rested her head on his chest, singing the lyrics for him quietly:

"Moon, tell me if I could send up my heart to you? So, when I die, which I must do, could it shine down here with you? Cause my love is mine, all mine. I love mine, mine, mine. Nothing in the world belongs to me, but my love mine, all mine, all mine."

"I like that. Mine all mine all mine..." The Doctor repeated softly. "Are you scared? Of dying?"

"I think you might be more scared of me dying than I am." 

"That's true, I never wanted to- get attached because humans come and go, you get old and you start losing your memories, yourselves... then you die. And I'm left here, life after life after life."

"But with me you're taking the risk? You're accepting this pain?" 

"I'd do it all over again if it meant I'd get this time with you. Even if it would only last a day, a week, a month... You're worth it. The pain of losing you one day is not greater than the pain of never having you at all." 

His brown eyes were shining with sadness but also hope. Loving someone is like ripping your heart out of your chest and accepting someone else can choose what happens to it. 

"To answer your question, I am not that scared of dying. I hope it feels like when you're a child and fall asleep on the couch after school so your mum carries you to bed and you wake up there. I hope Death is like a gentle old friend." Gallifrey explained. "She'll take my hand and guide me to you." 

"To me?" 

"You know, Doctor, I also need to cope with losing you several times. I know you'll regenerate over and over right in front of me and there's nothing I can do. And even though I will always love you no matter who you become, this is my Doctor. You, Ten. You're the Doctor I wanted to spend my life with." 

"I see... I'm so sorry, Gal." 

"Don't be, I dream that when I die, my handsome Ten will take my hand and we'll run to our home near the beach. Our two dogs will be waiting and we can just be us, no more regeneration or dangerous adventures, just us." 

"Is that what you think heaven is like? Sitting on a porch with me?" The Doctor frowned. "I wish I could give you what you want, I wish there was someone else who could do what I do. I'd stay as the tenth Doctor for you for a million years even if I go completely mad having to stay in one place for the rest of my life."

"I know, but I don't resent you. I know the Doctor's job is to travel around the universe protecting everyone. And I'll be your companion until I can no longer do my job." 

*

2023: UNIT Headquarters in London

"Shooting ducks... who is next?" The Toymaker pointed the galvanic beam at each of the ladies. "The companion, the soldier, the scientist, the orphan... the wife," he smirked at Gallifrey.

"Your fight is with me!" The Doctor shouted, enraged by the idea of losing anyone else. "And you owe me! One more ga-"

Before he could finish, the Toymaker struck him with the beam right in the chest. 

"DOCTOR!" Gallifrey cried. "No! I'm not ready, I'm not ready! I don't wanna say goodbye to my Doctor!"

"I played the first game with one Doctor, I played the second game with this Doctor, therefore your own rules have decreed. I play the third game with the next Doctor!" The Toymaker announced. 

Without thinking of any consequence, Gallifrey ran to her husband's side. "Kill me, make me into a puppet, I don't care! This is the last time I'm seeing the man I fell in love with!" 

Donna and Melanie followed, they didn't want him to die alone, even if it wasn't really a death. 

"I'm so sorry, Gal..." The Doctor looked at his wife with a pained expression as she held his hand. "This isn't dying, but I know how much it'll hurt you. I know you always say it doesn't matter, but please still love me even if I'm insanely ugly." 

"You can never be ugly, Doc, not to me," she sobbed, trying to take in every detail of his face. 

"I'll miss the way you look at me when I'm like this." 

"Don't worry about me, I love all your faces. I love all of you," she assured. "Fingers crossed you come ginger this time." 

"It's time, here we go again," the Doctor gave her one last kiss from the lips she adored so much. "Allons-y."

But then... instead of regenerating, he just stood there, feeling rather strange and a little foolish. Gallifrey looked at Donna, who shrugged, just as confused. 

"Doc, what's going on?" Gallifrey cried.

"Could you... pull?" He asked. 

"Could we what?" Donna looked at him with a disgusted grimace.

"Just pull, pull from each side, all of you. It feels different this time." 

Melanie and Donna did as he asked, pulling his left arm while Gallifrey did the same with the right. At first, it seemed like a stupid effort, but then the unimaginable happened.

The Doctor divided himself into two. The man that sprouted from her husband was tall, had dark skin and short hair, the most beautiful smile. 

"What?" Donna and Gallifrey murmured almost in unison.

"What?" The Toymaker winced. 

"No way..." Fifteen pulled his other arm out and for a moment they shared their bottom half. 

"You're me," Fourteen gasped. 

"No, I'm me. I think I'm really really me," Fifteen smiled. "I'm completely me! Now don't just stand there, push!" 

When the two Doctors separated, they ran into each other's arms and hugged like brothers. 

"What is happening?" Gallifrey stared at them in disbelief.

"Bigeneration! I've bigenerated, Gal!" Fifteen took her in his arms and spun her around. "There's no such thing, it's supposed to be a myth, but look at me! What do you think, my beautiful?" 

"I think you look gorgeous!" She admitted, placing her hand on his chest while his hands explored her as much as they could in front of such a big audience.

"Hey! That's my wife you're fondling!" Fourteen yelped. 

"She's also my wife," Fifteen smirked before stealing a kiss. 

"Aw my sweetheart is jealous!" Gallifrey took Fourteen's hand. "Don't worry, there's enough of me to go around." 

"He comes in a range of colors then?" Donna chuckled.

"Right! Have you ever been black before?" Gallifrey asked. 

"No, not that I remember... how exciting!" Fifteen grinned. 

"If I can interrupt," the Toymaker called. "Behold the game of the Time Lords, a dummy who dies and doubles and dies and doubles... I could play this for a hundred years. I'd have vast meadows of Doctors dying over and over again and never get bored because-" 

"I challenge you to a game!" Both Doctors said. 

That was the trouble, there was still a game to be won to save the world. But with two against one it had to be easier, right? 

Gallifrey could barely watch as the Doctors played catch against the Toymaker, the little ball flying from one hand to the other and always on the verge of falling. Until it did, it fell when the Toymaker couldn't catch it. 

"As my prize I want you to be banished from existence," Fourteen asked before running into his wife's arms.

"You two are brilliant!" Gallifrey beamed with excitement. "But there's one thing you're forgetting, Fifteen also deserves a prize. And I think I know exactly what it could be." 

She walked up to him and whispered in his ear to which he flashed her a smile. 

"You, my love, are a genius!" Fifteen ran into the TARDIS and pulled a toy mallet from underneath one of the floorboards. 

"What are you doing?" Fourteen asked as they all came out into the garage. "It's not a sexy prize, is it? I don't think I can deal..." 

"What if the Toymaker's domain is still lingering? Just for a few seconds while we're in a state of play? Everybody stand back! Wish me luck." 

"What for?" 

"Heeeere's my prize..." Fifteen hit the side of the TARDIS with the mallet and another TARDIS appeared right beside the first. 

"Oh dear," Fourteen breathed. "You know what that means, Gal?" 

"What?" Gallifrey turned to him.

"There's someone who can do what I do," he smiled softly. "I can give you your paradise." 

"Doctor! But- but you always said you'd go mad if you had to settle down." 

"Ah you know how I am, I can always take the TARDIS for a little spin. We can visit anywhere you want, no more dangerous adventures. We can sit on that porch facing the beach and just be us. No more regeneration for a long long time." 

"Are you sure?" 

"I've never been more sure of anything in my life... I've spent so many years fighting all those battles and now I know what for. Let's go say goodbye." 

Inside the new TARDIS it was pretty much like the old one, with the exception of a jukebox in the corner. 

"Come here!" Fifteen hugged Fourteen, then Donna, then Gallifrey. "Look after him, you two... now if you don't mind there's a great big universe calling and I got to get going. So off you go, old man." 

"You're the old man! You're older than me!" Fourteen gasped dramatically. 

"Okay... kid. I love you, get out," he said before starting the controls. 

"Let's go!" Gallifrey took her Doctor's hand and Donna's to get out before they got pulled into another crazy adventure. 

When they left, the TARDIS was already whirring, preparing to take off. 

"I don't suppose I've ever seen this before," the Doctor watched amazed. 

"Where's he going?" Melanie asked.

"Everywhere," the Doctor murmured. "Now where are we going, Gal? California, Hawaii, Australia, the Caribbean?"

"I think I know the perfect place," Gallifrey smiled. 

[inafieldofdaisies]

Five songs that remind you of the Seeds (outside of the game's OST) | Tag seen from @direwombat | Leaving the tag open <3

*I thought to include a snippet of the lyrics too when available

John Seed:

Kleptomaniac by DEZI

I'm a parasite I do anything to feed my appetite I'm gonna make this Hell look just like Paradise Sacrificial lamb, you think you've seen the light

Am I sadistic, do I do it on purpose? Antagonistic, am I making you nervous?

I crave the self-indulgence And I blame it on compulsion And I try to fight the urges But underneath the surface I'm a kleptomaniac

I'm gonna take it all And you're ok with that

Saints by Echos

You were standing there like an angry god Counting out my sins just to cross them off Saying that my tongue was too loud to trust And that my blood couldn't keep you

My dear, you're not so innocent You're fooling Heaven's gates So you won't have to change You're no saint, you're no savior

Looking at the Devil by Seibold

I like the taste of the poison I like the rush of the pain

I come alive in the darkness You know that I love the game While there's a snake in the garden No one's safe

See you bleed by Ramsey

I just wanna see you bleed Open you and set you free

Luci by ZAND

He's got a great big smile and cheekbones cut like knives But I know he's real ugly inside

Think there's gonna be a showdown Between my new hot friend and I My pocket knife is cutting up the ropes now Gotta try, gotta try I think there's gonna be a showdown Between my new hot friend and I 'Cause in the end, the ultimatum is that one of us has to die Not I

Jacob Seed:

Will you fight by Klergy, Beginners

Your time has come Can't tell hell from the sun When it's all said and done Who will you become? When nothing's as it seems Don't let 'em bring you down on your knees When nothing's as it seems Who will you become?

Will you run or will you fight? When the war comes

The Hunter by Sam Tinnesz

There's no rest for the fallen Oh we're burning the fields You're the snake in the garden And you're under my heels

Who's gonna save you Who's gonna save you now When the hunter comes

World Gone Wild by UNSECRET, Sam Tinnesz

Feeling the tension Pushing at the seams There's no way to stop this You can't stop this

The pressure is building It's getting hard to breathe No end to the madness

Four, three, two, one There's nowhere left to run

It's a world gone wild

Here come the wolves by Lola Blanc

Hеre come the wolves They're coming to get ya I run through the woods I'm not gonna let you go I'm baring my teeth, I'm ready My tongue is a sharp machete

Fighter by Jung Youth, Sam Tinnesz

I can feel the desperation All my dogs can smell the fear If you ain't ready for the belly Why you even coming here They been waiting for the end Before the game even begins And I've been fighting for my soul For my family for my friends I ain't ever giving up

Faith Seed:

River by Oh, be clever

I used to keep my dark a secret I used to keep my heart in pieces He said he liked me better as a mess He said he wants to save me from myself

Mermaid by Skott

Believe me, it is true You know that I would jump too Ooh, into the blue, into the blue It's proof, because we got nothing to lose And there ain't nothing to prove You know I'd jump with you

All I need by Roniit

Embrace me, I swear I'll be safe, I'll show you the way, open the gates I'm careful and believe me I'll stay I could be all that you're looking for

You're aimless, but you gotta be brave

Her & The Sea by CLANN (instrumental)

Chimerical by Roniit (instrumental)

Joseph Seed:

Reborn by Galleaux

I'm watching in silence Burying all I've lost Let this be the end Let me start again

Let the fire burn it to the ground Feel the world of ashes as it crumbles down Breathe the smoke, breathe it in Don't stop until it cleanses my sins

And I am reborn

And so It Begins by Klergy

You've been waiting Looking off into the night Search the horizon Watching out for smoke and fire You knew this day would come You aren't the only one And so it begins

The Beginning of the End by Klergy, Valerie Broussard

Reckless behavior is looking at a man Like he was a savior

Blind leading blind Everything looks darker When you close your eyes

Deity by Demo Club, TENDER (for the life of me I can't find the full lyrics, and I don't wanna guess them bcs TENDER be mumbling at times)

Shepherd of This Flock by JT Music (it's inspired by FC5 so ofc I'm including it)

Who found you while you were lost? When blind, who helped you see? Cuz I'm the shepherd of this flock I guide my righteous sheep Of your sins, I'll see you washed Then I'll set your soul free The word of God is one you trust So thank God He speaks through me

[imsparky2002]

Class of Heroes: For the First Time in Forever

For the first time in what felt like forever, the eldest Prince of Arendelle woke up with a smile on his face. He stared at the marked date on his calendar. The first day of school at Francois! The start of his treatment! He was finally going to be cured of this awful power!

“It’s orientation day.” He whispered, before letting out a laugh of joy. He jumped up and down on his bed. “IT’S ORIENTATION DAY!” He quickly got dressed, brushed his teeth, and ran out of his room. Marc gasped as he saw the light that had entered the dark castle grounds.

Marc:

They’ve opened the windows and the doors

I won’t miss out on sunlight anymore

And once I leave, the outside world awaits!

I’ll go beyond these empty halls

No longer imprisoned behind these walls

Finally, they’ve opened up the gates!

He stops and lets the breeze from outside flow through his body.

Marc:

I won’t feel a chill through my fingers

I’ll admit that it’s totally strange

But wow, am I so ready for this change!

The prince twirls around in joy, dancing throughout the ballroom.

Marc: 

‘Cause for the first time in forever

I’ll be normal, I’ll feel right

And when I come home for a visit

I’ll hug Kiran really tight!

The future was dark and cloudy

But now it feels so clear!

‘Cause for the first time in forever...

I won’t live in fear!

Marc decided to make a visit to Kiran’s room. He knocked on the door, and saw his little brother, as he opened the door. 

“Marc? You look so happy. What’s going on?” Kiran asked, yawning and rubbing his eyes. Marc furrowed his brow in confusion. He had never seen his older brother so joyous before.

“Didn’t Su-Han tell you? I’m going over to Francois for Orientation Day. I’m finally getting cured, little brother!” He cheered. Kiran gasped in shock.

“Cured? You mean you’re not gonna be sick anymore?” he asked. Marc nodded eagerly.

“Y-Yeah! And I’m sure there’ll be ways for you to visit. And when I come home for the holidays, we can spend more time together. Not just meals, but all day! That’s what I always wanted.” Marc replied, noticing the frown on Kiran’s face.

“M-Me too! But... how is going away gonna fix you?” Kiran asked, looking a little sad. Marc let out a sigh of regret as he looked away for a second.

“I can’t tell you here. I don’t want Su-Han to get upset. He’s always been trying to prevent me from seeing you. But once I get to Francois and begin the process, I’ll explain everything.” Kiran nodded, but he could tell the boy was gonna miss him a lot. Marc gently put an arm on Kiran’s shoulder.

“Kiran?” Kiran looked him in the eye. “Yes, Marc?”

“You... you know I never wanted to shut you out, right? I hope I made that clear.” he said, worriedly. Kiran nodded understandingly. Every time his invitations for Marc to come out had been rejected, he could hear the soft pain in his older brother’s voice. He knew that it was hurting Marc even more than it hurt him. “I... I know, big bro. I was never mad at you for that.”

Marc began to tear up as he held his brother tight, a mix of sorrow and joyful relief washed over him. “I love you, brother. I will always love you. And when I get back... we’re going to build the biggest snowman.” he said. Kiran couldn’t help but laugh at this, as he broke down as well.

“It... it doesn’t have to be a snowman.” he whispered. Marc let go, and started to make his way to the castle’s entrance, before looking back one more time.

“Ok... bye.” He said, waving at Kiran, before leaving his sight.

The little prince kept on a mask of happiness as he saw his brother enter the carriage that would take him away. He had to be strong... strong for Marc. It’s what he deserved.

Kiran:

Just smile and wave

Don’t let him see

A good brother is what you need to be

He needs to leave, be free, I know

But still I really wish he wouldn’t go!

But while Kiran avoided acting his age, Marc embraced it for the first time. He felt like he was floating on air as he made his way to the school. He let out a whoop of joy as he left the carriage and entered the school. All different types of students looked on with curiousity as he jumped for joy. It didn’t matter to him. He was happy enough to make friends, but what mattered most was the cure. And for the first time in forever... Prince Marc felt hope. The feeling of warmth never felt so good.

And that’s Marc’s introduction! Big thanks to Weeby for helping me write Marc and Kiran’s conversation. Our Anciel bros are so sweet! As always, reblog, reply, ask, and post for your thoughts on the content. @artzychic27 @msweebyness 

[yujo-nishimura]

A coffee break - Final Part

This is a heartfelt fanfiction dedicated to @lostfirefly, who has been a constant source of support and encouragement for my writing. Спасибо!

Last part! :) <3 Enjoy!

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6

Warning: Buggy x OC fem reader / Smut / Minors do not interact!

Their passion surged like an unstoppable force, engulfing them both. The atmosphere within the small bar grew hot and electric, the air heavy with anticipation. Buggy, still partially under the influence of alcohol, found himself unable to restrain his desires. He continued to kiss Helga on her lips, her neck, slowly wandering down with his lips to her chest and breasts. He gently started sucking on her nipples, making her moan softly. 

Longing and impatience consumed her after waiting for him for what felt like an eternity. As she gazed up at her captain positioned above her, a surge of desire coursed through her veins. With a sense of urgency, she seized his bandana, causing his flowing blue locks to spill over her soft belly and cascade onto the table. Despite his weary eyes and smudged makeup, he just looked magnificent in the warm embrace of the orange sunlight. There was an undeniable fire in his gaze, a spark that captivated Helga and compelled her to forgive him for all his past transgressions.

“I never allowed you to touch my hair…!”, Buggy chuckled now, breaking the kiss just to undress himself.

“Right now you are not my captain and I am not taking any orders!”, Helga smiled gently as she said that, helping him to undress, wanting to feel his hot skin on hers. The red-haired girl felt light-headed as she suddenly felt his hard cock pushing against her wet folds. He was so ready to be close to her, right here on this bar table and she held onto him in anticipation, as they continued kissing. 

“I cannot wait anymore..!”, he gently moaned in her ear as he pushed the tip slowly inside her. She was all ready to take him, being impatient herself she forcefully pushed her hips against him. As he was finally completely inside of her, he rested his head for a moment on her shoulder, his blue locks leaving a soft sensation on her skin. Then he slowly started moving, gently to make sure she could take him. Despite the awkward position on the table, Helga's body was trembling from the sensations. Buggy completely filled her with his throbbing cock, he still kept kissing her, just sometimes breaking the kiss to gasp for air and to look into her feverish glimmering blue eyes. 

“Damn, you look beautiful! You take me so well..!”, he hissed and slowly started to speed up his movements. Helga tried to hold on to the table, making sure Buggy could chase his orgasm inside of her. Sweat was glistening on his biceps and chest, he had changed position now, standing in front of the table and holding his girlfriend, pressing one of her legs up to push deeper into her. Helga felt her climax approaching, gently being rocked back and forth by Buggys movements, the friction became unbearable. "Don't stop!”, she moaned and tried to grab him, feeling she was almost there. Buggy, going almost mad by her moans, started to push even harder, the table gently squeaking under their actions. 

"I will claim you as mine, and I will never release you again...!" Buggy gasped, his words escaping in ragged breaths.

Helga couldn't reply, something in her seemed to snap, she trembled and as her velvet folds clenched around Buggys cock. He pressed his fingers deeper into the white skin of her leg. Lifting it a bit higher he blissfully moaned her name as he came inside of her. Sweating and heavily breathing he bent over her naked chest, kissing her once more. “Let's get out of here before someone comes. You come back with me on the ship!”, he whispered and Helga knew without a doubt that there was nothing else in the world she desired more than to embark on that journey with him.

"But promise me that you will control your jealousy and grant me the freedom I deserve as a member of your crew. I want to fight, to be a pirate like any other in your ranks," Helga pleaded.

"I will grant you that freedom, but I will also ensure that no one in this world will ever harm you," Buggy declared, his voice filled with determination.

Slowly rising to his feet, Buggy gathered their clothing, hastily adjusting his hair beneath the bandana, causing Helga to sigh with a tinge of disappointment over the sight of his hidden hair. 

"You don't belong in this place, pumpkin. A bar is not a fitting environment for a capable fighter like yourself," Buggy remarked.

"I am well aware of that. But once again, you must promise me that you will acknowledge this when we return to the ship," Helga insisted.

Buggy took her hand, pressing it against his chest, allowing her to feel the rapid rhythm of his heartbeat.

"I promise. From this moment forward, I will treat you better than I ever have," he vowed.

[wiff-waff]

Three short weeks today I will be free of the shackles of wage slavery. FMS.

12 shifts only.

I've kind of enjoyed my 17 month stretch toiling at YOS. I've learnt a lot about myself, mainly that I can still cut it in a busy kitchen but maybe only part-time and I've met some pleasing and hardworking co-workers who I will remember fondly.

Ella, Ella.

But I've had enough of slogging these old guts out for minimum wage + tips and I'm ready for a good long rest.

And our time in MK is coming to a close. We've wintered here for the last 7 years and though I never say never I can say with 99.9% certainty that we won't be back to stay. Not that there is anything wrong with the town of relentless roundabouts and concrete cows but we have done MK. It is too easy. Next winter I (we) need a new challenge.

Exciting.

Very very soon in the not too distant future it's my birthday. It's a big one. A very big one that is causing me no end of distress and misery. So big I can't even say the blasted number. I'm trying to embrace another decade older but that ain't happening either.

Never again am I gonna have wild nights clubbing.

I'm passing into the older generation. Me, my bro's and cousins, we're the next lot to go. And the young of my clan, mad Uncle Ian who lives on a boat and always sends us £10 every Christmas and birthday. He's cool!

I'm playing the long game (again) In 20 years they could be choosing me a care home.

[xtrablak674]

White Bitch

[Originally posted on my Livejournal, Saturday July 22, 2000 at 1:53 pm, from a copied AOL Instant Message, mildly edited for clarity]

Bluest0: what made you think i was white? ...just curious won't get mad no matter what you say

TrevorBrklyn: your first response to me....

Bluest0: what did i say?

TrevorBrklyn: and on the internet its not alway to easy to detect race

TrevorBrklyn: i dont chat with womyn online, so i thought if its someone responding to me it must be some white bitch

Bluest0: some people say i speak like a white person ( which is like hearing fingernails on a chalkboard for me to hear), i was just wondering if i write like one 2.

Bluest0: damn

TrevorBrklyn: i get that too. my best friend loves to tell me how white woman i am.

Bluest0: just a brotha to sista thing why would she be a bitch?

TrevorBrklyn: the white woman is my anti-thesis, enemy, never got along, alot of bad energy there

TrevorBrklyn: like the dynamic you read about on my tour

TrevorBrklyn: that little white bitch said just cause i was angry i assaulted her

Bluest0: i see clearly what you mean

TrevorBrklyn: in my career i have intimidated many a white woman

TrevorBrklyn: being an intelligent dark-skinned gay black male is not easy

TrevorBrklyn: in corporate america

Bluest0: i have observed that a lot with white women they will take things to a very dangerous level very quickly and without true cause,

brothas really should watch themselves

Bluest0: most brothas learn that the hard way

TrevorBrklyn: yeah and imagine here we were in a foreign country

Bluest0: what country again?

TrevorBrklyn: Switzerland

Bluest0: you know, it my experience, they don't just do that to brothas, they'll do it to anybody, it's just that brothas are not aware, because it's not the way sistas behave

TrevorBrklyn: i dont think brothers are not aware its just they can get caught out there

TrevorBrklyn: i am very aware of siddity white women and their ways

Bluest0: this white chick drove me home one night told me she knew a white guy who lived across the street, then told me the guy had raped her, i was ready to go with her to the police station for emotional support

Bluest0: then she says, i was drinking and he should have known better

Bluest0: i'm like NO white chick, you should have known better

Bluest0: just a little story

TrevorBrklyn: well that is white privilege

TrevorBrklyn: the right to be flighty and stupid

Bluest0: true that..

Bluest0: so.... do you prefer white men?

TrevorBrklyn: i dont prefer anyone now a days

Bluest0: guess i don't either.

TrevorBrklyn: black men have not done right by me either i was never "BLACK" enuff

Bluest0: really?

TrevorBrklyn: or "MAN" enuff

Bluest0: i ....occasionally get people who don't like me based on speech patterns once i know that, i deal with them as the idiots that they are

TrevorBrklyn: well i get that all the time

Bluest0: our people can be very hard on homosexuals

TrevorBrklyn: can't be an intelligent niggah, then if your a faggot forgetabout it

[Afterwords: I stand by my using the term "white bitch", not to encourage misogyny, but to embrace my genuine disdain for whyte women collectively. At this time I had so much trauma from whyte womens, Julie Crosby and her false but deadly allegations against me in Switzerland. Amy Van Aarle and her under-current of bad vibrations. She always seemed to think someone was coming for her, and I was barely even studying her, just trying to avoid her energy.

Even the whyte girls, because they were so young they were barely women, who got me fired from a gig for calling them out for promising a client something I knew the agency couldn't deliver. The most curious thing for me is that prior to interacting with whyte womens in usually some kind of working dynamic, I never really had much consideration for them. But repeatedly they showed extremely bad behavior towards me if they felt they had the least bit of authority.

So in the year of our lord two-thousand "white bitch" was the embodiment of my relationship to all whyte womens.

I will acknowledge that this may have been shocking and a bit surprising to Bluest, I have never been one to mince words, I attempted to give her a bit of context, but I wasn't going to apologize or pretend to be politically correct to mask my general animosity to whyte womens, which in large part started because of THEIR perceived insecurities.

Both of our relationships to Black straight men also seemed tentative and problematic, its so interesting to me to hear a perspective from a straight Black woman about their experiences with straight Black men. Bluest gets into it more in the part of our chat that isn't posted here, but like myself I felt she wasn't the biggest fan.

Coming from a Black straight woman her question about me preferring white men is suspect. It seems to be laced with this built-in nationalism where Black people always think we should choose Blackness over everything else, even if patriarchal Blackness has dogged you out. I am not with that, full stop. I don't think my Blackness is reduced in anyway by whom I choose to date or fuck. I feel its extremely problematic to continue to have interactions with someone who is openly hostile and despondent towards you.

As I have written about lately I had a very antagonistic relationship with Black men since I was a child, their apathy and sometimes open hostility to who I was based on how they perceived my performance of masculinity, or who I chose to love. Black men were never even a romantic consideration for me due in large part to once again their own behavior.

I find it reductive to even attempt to equate my dating other races as an indicator or a lacking in my allegiances to Blackness. My own nephew pointed out to me that Uncle Trevor you're #ExtraBlack, meaning that this young person saw that I might be slightly over-compensating for the fact that I was queer, femme and didn't necessarily talk Black, by making sure everyone knew I was BLACK AS FUCK!

Lastly I am most amused that both Blue and I struggled with the acceptance of our Blackness based on how we performed it. We were both clearly educated, cultured and respectively both white collar workers. We had interest beyond the mandated Black-approved topics, and actively had friendships and even romantic dalliances outside of the race.

As Gloria Naylor pointed out in her book the Women of Brewster Place, Black isn't any one thing, Black just is. And it is perfectly acceptable for a Black person to choose how they will manifest their Blackness, because at the end of the day in this country, they will always be Black ergo their interest are also Black.

It is silly to me that due to patriarchal white supremacy that those of us who are not cis straight whyte men fight amongst ourselves, perceive unfounded threats and creat animosity where there should be collaboration and friendship. In this piece I have talked about groups who are collectively disparaged for being "other" and not being the default which is white manhood. It doesn't elude me that we have drank the Kool-Aid and have ended up fighting each other when we all have a common enemy.

White women, straight women, Black women and queer people all face discrimination with nuances of difference, it would behoove use to come together and work to dismantle the hegemony that would seek to set us against each other as we fight for scraps from the masters table. There is plenty for all of us, and we would do best to acknowledge we can all get to the promised land if we link hands and try to get there together.

[Photos by Brown Estate]

Reprimand

Cece's Letter

Betrayed

[umaiyrhh]

FRAGMENTS OF AN INVISIBLE HEART

Journal entry #1 September 2,2024

Few months passed by just like how the cold winter passed by, I was doing better. I am back to my old self. I am so happy that I’ve finally reached this point. It was already mid weeks of my lecture and I was having a total blast in here. Or so I thought. I knew deep down its not the same anymore but life goes on, I need to make my parents proud as I already reached this far. As the day went on, I tried to focus on the little things—making a good meal, reading a few pages of a book, or listening to music that made me smile. Each moment felt like a step forward, a gentle push to keep moving despite the heaviness in my heart. Reflecting on today, I realize that sadness is a part of my journey, but it doesn’t define it. Life goes on, and I have the power to seek out moments of joy amidst the shadows. Tomorrow, I’ll continue to embrace that journey, one step at a time.

-maiy-

Journal entry #2 September 3,2024

My heart dropped as I received that messages. It was him. He came back with a long heartfelt paragraph. I don’t know how to describe my feelings. It was mixed feelings. There’s an anguish in me, with a little bit of sadness and a slight of happiness. I don’t think this was a coincidence. After all those sleepless night of my prayer, finally it has been answered. The man that I prayed for. The first thing I said to him after 3 months of breaking no contact was cursing. I mean A LOT OF CURSING. It’s been so long since he left me and suddenly he popped out again out of nowhere. HOW COME I AM NOT MAD? I guess that was my anguish and unsaid thoughts for all those months with lots stages of grief that I have to went through alone. As we talked, I couldn’t help but notice how much I still cared for him. The connection was palpable, and despite the distance that had grown between us, it felt like we picked up right where we left off. But then the weight of reality hit me. Deep down, I know I still love him. That truth lingered in the air, heavy yet hopeful. For now, I’ll take it one step at a time. I’ll allow myself to feel whatever comes next, but I want to stay true to myself and what I’ve learned from our time apart. It’s a complicated mix of hope and uncertainty, but I’m ready to navigate it.

-maiy-

Journal entry #3 September 22,2024

Through the days ahead, I’ve made up my mind. We want to try it again. This time we want to do it right. I was overcome with feelings of exhilaration, nervousness, and a tinge of terror when he reached out. We discussed everything that had transpired between us, the causes of our breakup, and the lessons we had discovered while apart. I was somewhat aback by how forthright and honest we were. This time, it seemed different, as though we were both coming from a position of development. The chemistry was still there, and it felt comforting to laugh and share memories again. But I also know that the past can’t be ignored. We’re not the same people we were, and I hope we can build a healthier dynamic this time around. I know it will take time and effort from both of us to rebuild trust and understanding. I will forever cherish this moment. With hope, till death do us part.

[fumikomiyasaki]

Mine! with Peko and Pluck or Tenera and Baliin

Love potion

Pluck was just ready to get to his room and practise for one of Flynns plays as Peko asked him to try some cakes out with him... an offer her could never resist given how big of a crush he had on her... thanks to what she said apperently Greg left those cakes in the cafe and she thought it was a gift for her... so before Pluck could even eat a piece she already had one stuffed in her mouth... but what happened after was like a dream to him. She suddenly got off her chair and sat down on his lap. His face grew bright red looking at her as that sweet smile hit him and she used her finger to boop his nose.

"Plucky... can you carry me to the couch?... I wanna cuddle but I am too lazy to walk..."

"P-peko?! Of course I would."

She felt so soft... he felt her breath against his neck even if she only layed down on him... this was the closest he was to her... he could die happy now... but then she even leaned up over him looking.

"Plucky... do you love me?"

"I love you more than anything, Peko-sama... you were for long the one I wanted to be with."

Her look at him was dazed... this had to be a dream... to think she was feeling that much affection for him... he was closing his eyes in hope that their lips met before suddenly someone spoke up.

"What is going on here?"

Emma looked at them too somewhat annoyed as Pluck got into panic. He didn't want to seem bad to her.

"P-peko just ate that cake and um..."

"Cake?... did you two even read the description of this... who brought this here."

"Gregory according to Peko-Sama."

She sighed calming down but then pulling Peko away from him... as she whined a little...

"No fair Emma... he is mine-"

"Listen she is under the influence of a love potion cake, we need to get her fixed."

"I-I see so she is..."

His head hung low... of course he couldn't be that lucky but reluctantly he agreed to help her and lure her to the infirmary... as Peko was normal again and said she was sleep he was already about to leave the room as Emma spoke up.

"The cake wouldn't have worked if she felt nothing for you, keep that in mind."

A spark of hope for sure and... at least he still had some of her smell on him but... still if only... at least now he was motivated to get back to practise in order to impress her.

Given his brother was busy on a date, Baliin thought similarly to give Tenera a visit who over text already said she needed some help around the room with some furniture being in the way of her wheelchair... arriving there however he caught her eating a cake at the table looking at him with curious eyes.

"You are here~ I hoped you would arrive soon."

"So where do you need help?"

"Actually... before we take care of that, could you carry me to bed?"

He didn't question it... after all given her condition rest was a good thing at times for her but what he didn't expect was her putting her hands on his chest and eying him with a more loving stare.

"You just look too good... I feel myself longing for you each time you are gone... the embrace of those strong arms... Bal... I know its selfish of me to ask but... I want you to me be mine for as long as you live... after all I know I sadly live longer..."

"Ten... its unlike you to be so direct..."

She placed both her hands on his shoulders to give him a kiss on the neck and leaving with a slight purr...

"I really... just need you..."

Her breathe was uneasy... to the point he was concerned about her untill he heard a noise from the kitchen... surprisingly it was his brother with Yasuno behind him.

"What are you two doing here?"

"We were just about to steal some snacks but... you should take a look at this."

He looked at the box where the cake was inside before that she ate... love cake... that explained a lot... as well as her cat like hissing cause he left... a sigh escaped him.

"I take care of her... but you two should not touch what is left."

"Aww but wouldn't it be fun if the Reaper grew even more mad for me?"

"Given how I am I don't think much would change."

Baliin gave both a glare and picked Tenera up...

"Did I say something wrong I... just wanted to show you how much I love you."

"You didn't... don't worry."

Even if she was under influence... he felt some truth was behind her words... which left a small smile as he brought her to the infirmary.