#bc what do you mean five left in the middle of the fight to go pout on a train

[midnightlamia]

just finished the umbrella academy. rant & spoilers incoming:

let me get this shit straight: the hargreeves siblings didn’t ask for their powers or to be born. said birth and powers were forced on them when reginald hargreeves couldn’t just shut up and die with the rest of his planet/wife. then he flies down to earth, adopts them all, and some 30 years later, we find them running around, constantly trying to save the world from an apocalypse, only to eventually find out that the apocalypses are happening not because this random fucking alien unleashed sparkle dust on the galaxy and abused children that weren’t his in the name of his wife….but because the hargreeves were just born.

that’s it. the reason the cleanse happened is a) their punishment for being born and b) abigail felt bad for an experiment gone wrong and decided to make it the entire timeline’s problem. and the only way to stop it isn’t to figure out a way to stop reginald from unleashing the marigold/coming down to earth & allow all of the og 43 children to be born naturally, when they’re supposed to be, but to….erase the children that never asked to be born from existence while leaving a million loose ends, unanswered questions, and shitty character choices that don’t get developed or explained in any way.

this season was just…….it was definitely a season of a show, i’ll give it that. the pacing was all over the place, so much so to the point where, if anything, we needed four MORE episodes, not four less. i have so SO SOOO many questions. where tf is sloane? what about the other 35 kids with marigold in them? why didn’t we see five create the commission? does durango give superpowers the same way marigold does? why couldn’t ben just drink the marigold himself if he wanted his powers back??? WHY THE FUCK WOULDNT YOU JUST GO AFTER THE MAN WHO UNLEASHED THE OG MARIGOLD INSTEAD OF THE INNOCENT HUMANS WHO GOT STUCK WITH IT WHO THE FUCK CAME UP WITH THAT?? YOU COULDVE DONE A WHOLE THING WHERE THE COMMISSION WAS ORIGINALLY DEDICATED TO FIXING REGINALD’S AFFECT ON THE TIMELINE OR LITERALLY ANYTHING—

literally just kill this last season with fire. burn it at the stake. i’m so pissed and so done. i’ve been watching this show since i was in fucking eighth grade, and i was so excited. i thought they were gonna do a whole thing where it could’ve been like “ben was always meant to die and now the universe is out of whack” or just SOMETHING other than what we got. steve blackman, i genuinely hope you have the worst fucking time for the rest of your life, you raggedy, smelly, conniving, ass-backwards bitch.

thank you and good night.

[umi-adxhira]

unhinged gen z!reader with platonic!agriche family i beg i need to see their reactions to trying to square up against the monsters bc it was not very mindful, very demure, or very thoughtful to wake them up in the middle of the night to deal with this batshit insanity

TWTPTFLOB WITH A GEN-Z READER

AUTHOR'S NOTES: THISSSSS I love this and I love you. I made these platonic but then I realised I should make it into relationship headcanons

I. ROXANNA AGRICHE

Since she's also ikesai'd into the manhwa I'm guessing she also used slang in the way you do, but since she's growing up in a historical setting she can't use slang so forgot basically everything

Actually spits out her tea when you say something genz-y

"What do you need?"

"I need a tailor for-"

"OKAY PULL UP HOE 🗣🔥🔥🔥"

Asks you for the posh-y slang, like "paint me like one of your French girls" or "very demure, very mindful" so she can use in front of other Agriche's and see thier reaction

Will pull you by the collar if you square up dead in the night to fight some monsters because they interrupted your sleep

"COME HERE! YEAH YOU FUCKING PUSSY, TRY THE FUCK AGAI-"

"You have to be kidding me..."

Tries to get you out of trouble if you say things that others won't understand and gives you a little kiss on the cheek if you somehow make up a massive save or you start a trend

II. JEREMY AGRICHE

Doesn't know what the fuck you're saying like HUH???

Finds your vocabulary interesting, will accidentally pick up some things from you but he uses it in the wrong setting so you just stare at him like ???

"That pie was good actually. I liked the consistency and-"

"You ate and left no crumbs"

"...thanks pookie"

Because he loves you he will learn ALL the gen z shit you know and will achieve it to maximum potential to the point where if he ikesai'd into our world he'd fit right in

If this delinquent sees you trying to start a fight with a monster because it interrupted your sleep he would start laughing lmao

Then he'd realise you can't fight for shit and quickly comes to your rescue

III. DION AGRICHE

Doesn't care enough to ask you what you mean. Has though of using your vocabulary as a code signal, or to communicate similar to learning a different language

Will start bugging out if he asks what something means and you just won't say

"Skibidi toilet rizz!"

"What"

"Sticking out your gyatt for the rizzler 😛"

"What does it mean"

"You're so sigma"

"..."

Babes if you wake up to a monster you're not even leaving the room. This lunatic will pull you down back on the bed, leave the room locking the door and come back five minutes later with some blood on his cheek

Actually finds you funny but on everyone's soul he will not crack a smile

IV. LANTE AGRICHE

Kinda starting to regret marrying you. But you're his favourite wife so he'll let it slide

Enjoys how humorous you are, has no idea what you're saying but you laugh at your own jokes so there's that

"...and I gotta say, thy neighbour does not feel very loved right now" *laughs*

*let's out a chuckle*

If this scallywag sees you tryna box a monster because if interrupted your beauty sleep, he will kill that thing faster than you can finish your complaint

"YOU WANNA GO BRO??? YOU WANNA GO??? NEVER BACK DOWN NEVER WHAT- oh thanks dear"

Randomly gets hit with a wave of nostalgia on how you first met, you yelling at him to go suck his mum, while him trying his absolute best not to feed you to the monsters in the breeding grounds

©️umi-adxhira [22/10/2024]

[xhanelia]

What i feel about you based on your main agent (bad edition)

I will write the requests but i am in my writerblock era so hoping this will cure it. Love u all <33

Brimstone

Please stop smoking our entrance when we are the attackers please i beg you.

You never speak nor listen. We all know your mic and the whole team is either muted or you are basically deaf.

I have never seen a child play him so you are old. I mean old old. Like a dad or smth

Chamber

The chamber nerfs are a delusion you suck either way

Stop spending your whole 800 credit to a pistol that you will forgot for the rest of the game.

"I was in my prime before chamber nerfs guyss!!🤓🤓" Yea yea we get it.

Chyper

Can you stop saying "I kNoW eXAcLY wHErE U ArE" for five seconds?

You cannot aim so you place a setup that is unbreakable to attackers and letting your traps do all the work for you. How smart. (Thats me)

Cannot do shit when the last one left. You get one or two kills with your trap and u die middle of the round.

Deadlock

Stop placing sensors to our back, trying to hold the backsite but enemy can slow walk and bypass you u know? Then you be raging "I PuT a SeNSoR ThErE"

Istg if i get tangled down by your c one more time im gonna ragequit.

Your ult never gets anyone yet there is the whole five of the enemy team.

Fade

Your prowler shows no one, girl. Stop throwing it at the start of the round.

Stop trying to control your c you are losing so much time and its gonna get no one.

Ult when your team is near PLEASE. Its no effective if you are by yourself and scream "FACE YOUR FEAR" bcs you are the one that will be facing it.

Iso

No one mains iso.

Stop smurfing. Its no fun.

Go back to your own league. You coward.

Jett

You are a little child screaming into mic bcs you dashed forward to enemy and died.

Stop sitting onto the keyboard and actually aim maybe you'll get a kill.

Play with the team once. (I hate you with my whole heart)

Kay/o

You either never use your flashes or you blind just your teammates.

Your ult doesnt makes you undying you know? Stop running towards to the enemy like its new paradise.

The most avarage player. Middle fragging the whole game.

Killjoy

Just gives the info, maybe gets one or two kills because of the stupid dasher enemy jett and dies.

That turret be doing no damage if its on your team but be dealing 50+ if its on the enemy team.

Dont just sit there and wait FUCKING ROTATEEEE

Omen (my main)

Stop using c and teleport mid fight. Its no chamber tp or yoru tp. It takes time to teleport and takes time to handle the gun. You are going to die.

That blind hit no one. Stop being delusional and do not push. You are going to die.

If you do not know how to put a smoke when you close the 'astra' mode, do not. Place it slowly if requires. And again, if you dont do it fast enough, you are going to die.

Phoenix

STOP TROLLING YOUR TEAMMATES WITH YOUR MOLLY AND WALL ISTG I HATE YOU

That flash will hit you. It doesnt matter if the phoenix is on the enemy team or on your team. Or worse, both.

You are not that bad, you just need some humanity.

Sage

I hate you if you are an egirl that instalocks sage just to be a pocket sage to your eboy that plays reyna like reyna cannot heal herself. Stop. Also stop talking. Your voice irritates me.

Her voicelines are so unnecessary. Especially the ones at the start of the round.

We all know you are on top of your wall that closes mid. Dont peak. Also, stop throwing slows to OUR entrance.

Sova

Nobody is going to do anything about your arrow that you throw at the start of the round and showed three or four people. The team will still push. Stop trying to learn freaky arrows and waste your time.

Shock dart kill? What is that?

This agent is not friendly for beginners. Stop making your friends that just started the game play sova. They will show no information for you. Even being a pocket sage is better than a new-starter sova.

Viper

Its ok if you do not have linups. But if you do, then we all know that you havent touch the grass for a looong time and you probably smell like her ult. Please shower.

She be no mommy to you. She is kind of woman that rejects chamber, what made you think that she will even let you look at her way?

"Last player standing"

Yoru

Like kay/o. That flash is here only to blind you. Not the enemy.

Taking the spike and going to another site, saying you'll be back to us then will die and make it drop at the farest site possible. Either stop taking the spike or dont do this shit.

You either bottom frag or top frag. There is no in between. And you are probably 12-13 years old.

Astra

I have never seen someone mains, even plays astra.

So i have nothing to say. Im so sorry :(

Your smokes looks pretty tho. Keep it up!

Breach

You are a man that cannot stand woman. If a woman says anything bad about you, you will blind them, hit them with all of your abilities and do whatever it takes to make them unable to play the game. (Totaly not single-handed experience)

I hate your abilities. Very much.

I do not have any good experience about someone that plays this agent. Not a single one. I will dodge the game if someone picks breach no joke.

Gekko

Your molly is useless. I have seen once maybe twice that it kills somebody.

You have so much potential with wingman when you are the last one standing but wingman is the last thing that comes to your mind. Use it.

Why tf that trash is pickable and usable more than once??? Why?? (You are a nice person tho. Cannot move on without saying it.)

Harbor

Players that plays harbor are no joking. They are not here to learn the agent. They MAIN main him. But that doesnt makes a difference because this agent is close to useless.

Tbh he could have been my main if his abilities were a bit more versatile. Its just smoke and smoke. All about closing the sight of enemy. So fucking boring.

I bet if harbor was a girl, there will be so much people that would play him. Either way, he is boring.

Neon

Stop running and jumping around like an autistic.

You will never be able to nail those neon edits that you saw on tiktok. You look like an idiot while running towards enemy and dying first.

I hate her ult.

Raze

You are a child. A problematic one indeed.

Probably siblings with jett mains.

I bet even i could do better satcheling than you. (i have never played raze)

Reyna

I have no words.

Stop instalocking her. You are no useful.

Either top frag and smurf or bottom frag because your friends said that she is strong and you should play her. (0/11 powerspike. Yasuo of valorant.)

Skye

Just like kay/o and yoru. But that flash will hit the whole 10 that plays the game.

PLEASE HEAL I BEG YOU YOU HAVE HEAL PLEASE PRESS C PLEASEEEEEEE

Deserved nerfs tbh.

[imeanwhynotbruv]

Stranger things/Black phone crossover Au

(Call me family)

Ok so I absolutely adore stranger things / the black phone crossover au fics. Like I actually can’t get over it or stop reading them, I can’t seem to find all that much on it but when I do I absolutely love itttttt!. Like it’s to the point I can’t get certain HCs out of my head so here we are!

So I think one of my fav plots (I’ve found like one) is of Vance & Billy being related and I can’t get enough! Or Vance being related to Hopper (especially as his son but that doesn’t work for this so Uncle Hop!).

Also I love the idea of them having cute nicknames! Eg

Billy for Vance : Pinhead, kiddo, little guy, terror

Vance for Billy: Billy Bee, bubba

Ok so hear me out. Vance and Billy are half brothers, Billy’s mum left when he was like two years old (bc that’s more convenient 👀) because Neil is an abusive ass who is also very unfaithful.

So like maybe a month later Neil gets with Layla Hopper (Jim Hoppers estranged little sister) who he was on again off again with, she gets pregnant and voila! You have Vance Hargrove!

While little Billy is sad that is mum is gone he’s happy to have a new baby brother (he’s not an ass yet that’s later)

it just so happens little Vance is absolutely obsessed with his big brother. Like he looks at him like he framed the sky just for him and he follows him around like a baby duck.🐥. Even the kids Billy hangs out with just accept that his Lil bro is probs coming too.

At this point Billy takes his big brother roles very seriously. He’s practilly the one raising Vance bc Neil sure as hell isn’t gonna do it, Layla is young, like grossly young for Neil but still legal, and she doesn’t know what she’s doing and while she’s not that bad she’s not the best and kinda just leaves the kids to it.

So it’s Billy doing all the things Like:

• When Neil is being a dick Billy will keep is lil bro distracted so he doesn’t piss Neil off

•if Neil is getting violent Billy will intensionally set him off if he’s worried he might go after Vance

•if his lil bro is having a nightmare he will put him back to bed and keep him company, with promises to watch incase the monster comes out from under then bed.

• he’ll walk Vance to the beach after he finishes School

• he’ll take him to get Icecream /make his meals

•teaches him how to properly insult people and how to make comebacks(just general life things)

Unlike what Billy’s like with Max, he absolutely insists that Vance is his little brother not half brother.like he’ll fight you to prove it cuz he totally would.

Also I can totally see Billy being the one who first takes Vance to an arcade and shows him pinball. Little Vance is absolutely fascinated and it Billy who teaches him how to play the game. They always compete against each other at the arcade, and Billy’s not the kind to just let you win (most of the time) so Vance spends ages practicing so he can win.

Then on the day Vance genuinely beats Billy, he gets a high five and an “about time Pinhead” and from that day in he is affectionately insulted with being called Pinhead and he wears it like a crown!

But no one else can call him Pinhead (cuz Billy won’t allow any disrespect (plus that’s his thing)) so people start calling him Pinball Vance!

Eventually Layla has enough of Neil’s abusive controlling ass and decides to leave him (good for her but my poor babies) and takes Vance who is like 8y/o at that point.

Lil Vance doesn’t want to leave his big brother, lil Billy is sad but he know Vance is probs better off (that doesn’t mean he wants him to go)

So the brothers part ways and promise to call each other all the time but sadly that’s impossible as Neil changes their number out of spite and Billy doesn’t really know where they ended up.

So Layla changes Vances name and he becomes Vance Hopper as a kind of middle finger to Neil.

She marries a guy called George Howle two years later when Vance is 10, this guy is basically Neil again but super manipulative and Layla is too tired to run away this time.

Neil married Susan a year later (he blames Layla leaving on never being married to her)and she moved in like immediately with Max who was 8 (she’s a Year younger than Vance and three years younger than Billy bc I say so)

Neil forbids billy from ever talking about Vance or Layla so Max knows next to nothing about him, barely knows he exists.

Billy is resentful because he feels like Max is trying to replace Vance (which is kinda what Neil is doing) but she’s not she just knows that Billy doesn’t like her so she decides she doesn’t like him. Neil continues to be an abusive asshole.

Billy becomes an ass because he’s a kid with anger issues, no outlet, and abusive dad, a stepmom who willingly looks away when things get bad, an annoying redhead who gets him into trouble and is constantly missing his little brother.

Vance becomes an ass and constantly picks fights due to the neglect of his mother, abuse of his stepfather, anger issues, missing his brother and at this point is practically a learned behaviour.

Ok side note, the grabber has already killed Billy and Griffin (sorry babies 😭)

The grabber kidnapped Vance (when he was 13 bc I need that age), the grabber has to keep Vance drugged bc he’s still pretty big and won’t stop throwing punches. The grabber gets cocky at not being found and Kidnaps Bruce, Robin & Finney (they’re not really in this but that could change depending). Does some of his awful shit to them, especially Vance, because he thinks he’s pretty and the grabber is creepy af.

The Bboys get their chance and kill the grabber escaping, Bruce has to literally carry Vance, Robins arm is broken, they’re all messed up and end up in hospital. Most end up in comas (for plot convienece)

When Layla was going to visit the hospital, she was speeding bc she realised how terrified she was for her son and desperately wants to see him, she gets into a car crash and dies before she ever reaches him.

George refuses to take Vance in because he’s a delinquent and is now traumatised so after they can finally track down Jim hopper (bc Layla had put him in her will as who would be Vances guardian and just never changed that) by the time Vance moved to Hawkins season 2 is ending and Season 3 is starting.

So like he vaguely remembers Jim but not enough to want to go live with him in the middle of butt fuck nowhere.

•••

This might just be referenced and not actually done bc like, it’s just the show mainly.

The Hargrove/Mayfield family move to Hawkins in 1984 (billy16,Max13, because plot and I say so) (season 2)

On the night when Billy is supposed to attack Steve, he gets attacked by a demo dog (not badly just enough to see it at maybe get a bit hurt) outside outside the Byers house. The kids come out and see Billy basically winning against this monster through the sheer will of not wanting to die.

Steve helps him kill it with the bat, Billy gets given all the details and after a minor breakdown and trying to not believe it finally goes along. (Part of him still hoping it’s just a dream). Eventually he joins the party when they go to the tunnels because someone needs to drive and apparently that’s Billy.

Demon dogs get torched. Basically the same ending just + Billy.

•••

End of season 2/ beginning of season three

Vance gets to Hawkins and the fun can begin

(This is getting long so imma stop)

(If you want my other stuff for this au is under the tag= Call me family au)

[stevethehairington]

i blame you for making me think about tommy and carol bc i've never really given them much thought before. they were clearly written to be these obnoxious high school stereotypes and not much more than that, so i love how you're looking through that and making them more dimensional. what do you think they'll grow up to be like? are they gonna leave hawkins after high school, will they stay there forever, will one of them leave while the other stays? will they grow apart after high school, or will they always keep that toxic codependency going? please gimme all your thoughts <3

ANNA! "i blame you for making me think of tommy and carol" are my FAVORITE words to hear sflkjgfdlkg that's like music to my ears. the more people i can get thinking deeper about tommy and carol the better fdkjgfl.

they fully were written to be those obnoxious high school bully stereotypes, but boy oh boy, there is SO much nuance in how the portrayals of these characters actually came across onscreen.

when i think of tommy and carol and their futures, i honestly can see things going a couple different ways - which mostly stems from the fact that there are a lot of little headcanon details about them i like to change up in my head that then directly impacts which route their futures would take (the biggest fluctuating details being their sexualities; how their future plays out will be fundamentally different to me if it's just tommy that's gay, if it's carol that's the lesbian, if they're both some flavor of fruity, or if neither of them are.)

if i sat here and went through each slightly different future i imagine for them we'd be here forever fkdljgfd sooooo for now i will just tell you about my personal favorite.

first, a little backstory because i think it's important to know where they came from to know why they are the way they are because that ultimately drives where they end up:

i personally like to think that tommy hagan comes from a big family - a big family of all girls, too. he's one of five, the middle child, with two older sisters and two younger sisters. i also like to think that his mom is a single mother - and when it comes to his dad, my hc isn't super nailed down for him. i do think he was there when tommy was younger, but his father left, maybe around when tommy was nine? ten? but either, his dad was cheating on his mom and ended up leaving her (and their kids) to be with this other woman (maybe because SHE got pregnant?) OR tommy's dad hit his mom, and that went on for long enough until she finally stood up and kicked him out. out of those two options though, i like to lean towards the first one, beeeeecaaaause it makes tommy's motivations and behaviors THAT much jucier sdlkfds. BECAUSE combine tommy's middle-child-syndrome with this early abandonment and of COURSE he's got issues. OF COURSE he has to find every way to get attention because he doesn't get enough of it at home and OF COURSE he gets upset and lashes out when people he's close to leave him because he's got abandonment issues (so when steve, his friend, his best friend, suddenly drops him and carol, of course tommy gets upset). also, random tidbit that didn't really fit in anywhere else dkfls but i think i mentioned it in my response on that initial post that started all this but i DO think tommy is an angry guy. BUT i do not think that manifests in the same way as it would for a lot of other guys. he's NOT outwardly angry all the time, he's NOT always looking to pick a fight, he's NOT a physically violent guy. i think his anger stems from very specific circumstances - i.e. circumstances where his control is slipping - and while he doesn't resort to physical violence (aside from maybe a shove here or there, because that's the most we ever see onscreen in a moment when he is genuinely upset and angry), he lashes out. verbally. he says MEAN shit - and because he's friends with carol, his tongue has sharpened over the years (and also, growing up with all sisters means he's well accustomed to the ways of female warfare lol - aka the vicious mind games and cruelty of the tongue that is more common than physical violence). SO that means he knows how to go for the jugular with just his words, and that, sometimes, can be even worse than a punch to the nose.

carol, on the other hand, i like to think also comes from a single mother household, but unlike tommy, she is an only child. i like to think that she and her mom moved to hawkins when she was... maybe 12 or 13, so middle school age. she wasn't super popular at her old school, is the thing. i don't think she was necessarily super bullied or anything, but she didn't really have a lot of friends and she probably didn't get a lot of attention either. so when she comes to hawkins, she sees it as a chance to reinvent herself. she doesn't let herself fall into that new girl trap, and she's outspoken from the get go - perhaps a little to her own detriment, because while she does make friends, they ALSO scares a lot of people off because of how cold she seems (which is ENTIRELY a self-preservation thing for her). and then somehow, someway she catches the attention of steve harrington. steve harrington, who, at this point, is already well on his way to being the golden boy King Steve that we see in high school. and she clings to that, because that's her ticket to the top. i think maybe she gets a little crush on steve at first - except it isn't actually a crush. she just likes what he can offer her - the popularity, the attention, the feeling of being needed, and she misreads that as having a crush on him. (and if you subscribe to the carol is a lesbian hc, which i sometimes do! this "crush" would be FULLY because that's what's expected of her; all the other girls like steve, all the other girls think he's hot and awesome and perfect, so that must mean she should to, right? - but that's a different future route that i'm not taking here so. putting this back on the shelf for now lol).

ANYWAYS. yeah so carol gets folded into steve and tommy's mix. she befriends them, she gets close with them, they become a trio. inseparable.

tommy and steve have been friends since grade school. maybe they were sat next to each other because their last names both start with H, maybe even as a small child steve already has lots of friends because he's nice and he shares his toys and he's got kids coming up to him all the time asking him if he wants to play and he always says yes. but then one day it's steve that's toddling up to tommy and asking him if he wants to play. steve chooses tommy. and the rest is history. and as they grow up, steve starts growing into his looks and he gets good at sports and joins all the teams and he excels, so he's got people fawning over him and flocking towards him for any sliver of attention he's willing to give them. but at the end of the day it's tommy that gets steve's full attention. it's tommy that steve tells everything to, it's tommy that knows steve best, it's tommy who steve trusts, it's tommy who is steve's best friend. and tommy REVELS in that. it's that attention he's been craving his whole life. this, naturally, leads to tommy feeling possessive over steve. and he doesn't realize that this possessiveness is a little more deeply rooted than just wanting to keep steve's friendship until steve starts to look at girls.

the first time tommy sees steve with a pretty girl on his arm, he gets this sick, curdled, twisting feeling in his gut. at first he thinks it's because he's jealous of steve. jealous that he has a date and tommy doesn't. but when steve comes back and tells tommy that it didn't work out, tommy gets this relief that floods through tommy. he doesn't really understand it at first, and definitely doesn't examine it too closely either, just sort of shoves it down deep and doesn't worry about it. but then steve finds another girl, and this time things DO go well, and, naturally, as steve's best friend, tommy becomes the person that steve tells everything to. he tells tommy all about the dates, all about the kisses he shares with these girls, all about when things go a little further... tommy listens, because of course he does, but the whole time he's thinking all these horrible thoughts about the girl and that ugly feeling is back knotting up his insides. and omg when steve tells tommy about losing his virginity - OH BOY. he goes into detail, because that's what teenage boys do, and tommy listens but he's sitting there with this whole STORM of emotions swirling through his head - the twisted need to know more, the urge to scream at steve to shut up, disgust because he doesn't want to think about steve with someone else, turned on because its steve talking about having sex, deep shame because hes forced to face the fact that he's wishing it was him with steve instead of that girl. this, perhaps, is even the first time tommy is like. FULLY faced with the true nature of his feelings, the ones he's been shoving away and ignoring this whole time.

i think tommy struggles with it. being gay (which he refuses to consider himself) is obviously not accepted in that time period. and he knows he'd get absolutely pummeled if anyone caught wind that he'd even thought about another boy like that. whiiiich is where carol comes in.

i think at this point tommy is probably already with carol - when steve started showing his interest in girls, tommy didn't want to get left in the dust, so he tried to find himself a girlfriend too, and it just so happened that carol was right there and it was so easy because carol was just so easy (WOMP). i like to think that maybe they started as a hookup. tommy wanted to lose his virginity, and carol was right there, and well, there were rumors about her, and all tommy had to do was ask, and she said yes, and then it sort of snowballs from there because (even though their first time was probably fumbling and not actually the greatest overall, tommy still liked it, and if he liked sex with a girl there's no way he's gay, right?) then he asks her out and she says yes again, and they start this relationship that maybe didn't really stem from any true feelings at first, but like they sort of caught the feelings along the way, like they learned to love each other along the way.

and the thing is - i do genuinely think that tommy and carol loved each other. i do. i don't think that their relationship wasn't real, even if tommy is actually gay. i think they had a lot of fun together, and i think that the feelings were there. they just weren't enough. because despite things going pretty well with carol, tommy was still thinking about steve. he was still actively having those feelings even while with carol. (which - maybe he was just projecting those feelings onto carol.) regardless, though, there is a love that exists between tommy and carol - i just think that over time it morphs into something different than what they both initially thought it was.

NOW. when it comes to their future (WHICH HELLO THIS IS WHAT YOUR ASK WAS ABOUT AND IM ONLY JUST NOW GETTING TO IT SKFJDS S O R R Y AND THANK YOU FOR STICKING WITH ME THROUGH ALL OF ^^^ THAT PREAMBLE SKDJFL)

since we are talking about my favorite potential future for them, it looks a little something like this:

they stay together. all through high school. when steve leaves them, things get a little rocky between tommy and carol, because steve was the glue that held them together, ultimately. but they both sort of realize that they're all each other has left, now that steve's gone, so they temper things. they marry out of high school - or that's when tommy proposes anyways, because tommy's barely three quarters of the way through his first year of community college when there's a pregnancy scare (which - honestly, everyone's surprised that didn't happen earlier) but yeah, carol's late, and when she pees on the stick it's positive. when she tells tommy, tommy proposes - because that's the right thing to do. he's not going to ditch her, he's not going to make her do that on her own. carol says yes, because what other option does she have here? but when they actually go to the doctor about it, they find out that the test was a false positive; carol is not pregnant. they stay engaged though, carol still wore her ring, and tommy stayed with carol, and neither one of them said anything about it. they followed through with it three years later after tommy graduated with a business degree and a cushy job at carol's dad's company.

at this point, they've known each other for almost a decade, and they've been together for most of it. so they know each other pretty well. which means - carol knows about tommy's... interests. she's fully aware. has been since high school, actually. she clocked tommy's crush on steve reeeeal quick, and actually confronted him about it once - which forced tommy into a corner and when he'd tried to deny it she's just scoffed and told him to quit fucking hiding from it. and he did. he'd admitted it to her, which was still difficult for him, but he'd gotten a bit better about admitting it to himself over the years. and in response to it, carol told him she didn't care.

which was really the best god damn way it could've gone. she told tommy that she didn't care that he gets off to guys, that she didn't care that he thinks about them, that he wants them. in fact, she told tommy that she didn't even care if he wanted to fuck around with them on the side. so long as he came back to her in the end, she didn't care.

and so, most nights tommy will slip off his wedding ring, he'll make the drive to whatever innocuous city is far enough away that he wont run into anyone he knows, and he'll seek out the company of other men. and when he's had his fill for the night, when he's satisfied that itch, he'll drive back to hawkins, and he'll try to be quiet as he enters the house and changes into his pajamas, and then he'll slide into bed next to carol and he'll go to sleep.

it's... it sounds like a pretty miserable existence, the two of them trapped in this seemingly unhappy marriage. but it's actually not. not really. it works for them. like i said before, they do love each other. it's just not that same sort of love that was there when they were kids, when they first started out. it's changed, it's morphed, it's turned into something more familial, rather than romantic.

maybe one day they will finally move out of hawkins. maybe that will be the beginning of the end. maybe once they're out from underneath the thumb of the town they grew up in, out from underneath the pressure of playing the expected role for all the people they knew there, they can start to live their own lives. maybe they'll finally get a divorce. maybe tommy will finally outwardly acknowledge his sexuality. maybe carol will finally find something she's good at and thrive with it. maybe maybe maybe.

FIN. skfjgdlkf. omg if you've made it this far THANK YOU for sticking with me and reading through all my rambling headcanons. i really mean it when i say i think about tommy and carol and their lives ALL THE TIME dkfsdlf. and like i said at the beginning, this is just ONE of the many pathways i've thought of for them sklfjsdf.

anyways, THANK YOU for asking and for indulging me in my love for tommy and carol!!! this was truly so much fun to write up and i loved getting to do that.

[also i GOTTA throw a little shameless self promo here, if you liked what you read here, this headcanon DOES feature heavily in my tommy-running-into-steddie-at-their-high-school-reunion fic, which you can find here. i ALSO have another stommy fic, which you can find here, which details my headcanon for steve's first kiss (which as i'm sure you've guessed, is with tommy).]

[mickeytheticklee]

Lost control

Pairing: Maria x Lee!Reader

Summary: You and Maria get into an argument after you fought Pablo at school

Warnings: Tickling, fighting, angst I think idk what that is tbh, yelling and cussing bc that's in Control Z, short mention of blood, this isn't proofread sorry :/

Note: I haven't finished this show and idk if I will bc I got spoiled so yeah ❤️, there's fluff in the end y'all dw

“Y/N! STOP!"

You stop by Maria's demand. You two were in the middle of the hallways, no one was around. You turn around, your bruised up face looking at Maria. Five minutes ago you were in a fist fight with Pablo over her constantly bothering Maria. When Pablo tried to push her that's when you intervene, throwing the first punch. She was mad at both of you. Pablo for being in her personal business but at you for encouraging his behavior and wanting to fight. She expected more from your nice nature to not fight back.

“I know what you're going to say and I don't want to fucking hear it." You say, walking away but Maria grabs your wrist. She pulls you back to the other side, seeing your face again. You got a black eye, your nostrils filled with dry rigid blood as your lip was busted too. All you gave Pablo was a black eye, seeing he was a much better fighter than you.

“You should've had done that! You would've gotten expelled!!", Maria says, raising her voice at you. School fights have been much more stricter after the old principal resigned. Any acts of violence under school grounds would get expelled, regardless of who fought first. It didn't matter to you if you got expelled by the school, it would be worth it to protect Maria. “Well maybe I want to if it meant protecting you!!", You yell back at Maria.

She rolls her eyes, thinking you have missed the point of your irrational decisions. “Gosh you're so stupid!! If you fight then you're snooping to Pablo's level!! You'll easily be an asshole if you contribute to his actions!! Why is that so hard to understand!!" Maria, says, still yelling. Her finger points to your shoulder for emphasis. She never means to yell at you, it's mere frustration and fear that if you leave school you'll never return. In your mind you wish Maria could understand how much you'll sacrifice to see herself blossom in confidence like the first time you met her. She's been so quiet, allowing herself to be pushed by her sister or Pablo. You've both been non confrontational buddies but when Pablo was insulting her that was your last straw. Whispering profanities in her ear and blaming her for everything as if he didn't cheat on her.

“I DO THIS BECAUSE I LOVE YOU MARIA!" You say, tearing up. No students were in the hallway, as they were avoiding the argument but secretly eavesdropping from the corner. A silent pause came from both of you. Maria couldn't even get a word out, her mind was still processing what you said.

“Your the best thing that has happened to me. I'm not going to let people say shit behind your back and not doing anything about it. I may be a terrible fighter and I'll fight for you and make sure that fucking idiot leaves you alone. I LOVE YOU! WHY CAN'T YOU KISS ME AND TICKLE ME WHILE YOUR AT IT!"

Oddly enough she followed your demand.

Her lips clash with yours in the middle of the school hallway. Her lips were cold, being able to calm down your hot temper. It was such a romantic moment, passionate lips as you two were unaware of the background noise. All the students were watching you macking tongues with Maria, even Pablo. “Wow, she's got game." Rosita, says commenting on the kiss. Your lips parted, and all you paid attention to was her beautiful eyes. Maria caressed your jaw, touching your bruised lips. You wiped out the bit of blood from the corner from her mouth. You both giggled, seeing how you both make irrational decisions.

“I'll see you this afternoon." Maria says, smiling at you. She gives you a short kiss on the cheek before leaving the other direction. You smiled once she left, excited that your going to be wrecked after school. It'll be a fun afternoon, since you love a bit of roughhousing. Plus you know under that love there's deep seeded revenge from Maria after that tiny argument. The school bell rings, two periods left until you reunite with Maria. You skip to class, having that big grin on your face the entire school day.

X

“STPPMARIAHAHAHHA."

Maria skitters her fingers across your tummy, giving you a taste of your own medicine. You're laughing all over the place, moving around even if Maria is on top of you. Her thighs straddling your waist giving you a deep tissue massage on your belly, near your bellybutton. You yell out her name several times, in which she hears clearly but doesn't care. It brings her joy whenever you say her name while lovely laughter fills the room.

“Oh baby it hasn't even passed five minutes yet. How will you survive an hour of this?" Maria says, stopping the tickles to tease at your weakness. You give her soft kisses, a few of the residual giggles letting out. You did it to give a steady break from the tickling but Maria won't give in too easily. As she bends down, kissing you her hands remain on your sides, her thumbs inches away from your hips. Your hands go over her red cheeks, smiling but it soon went to laughter. Your head swung back at Maria pinching deeply into your helpless sides.

“Trying to let my guard down? I'm afraid it won't be that easy." Maria says, pinching your sides. You were laughing, but it wasn't belly laughs that you wanted. She was only warning you up, for the next fifty-five minutes it will be nothing but torture only. In which you liked, since you talked about this beforehand to her.

“Can you at least give me a kiss before you begin?" You say, pleading with your pouty lips on display. Maria gets close, her nose coming into contact with yours. You can feel her hot breath in her face. The tension tight, you felt her lips right there all she needed to do was kiss you. Then she got you, tickling your tummy while you laugh harshly, your belly moving up and down to her fingers. The ability to keep your hands away from Maria's fingers was a talent. But it's only because if you did interfere with your punishment she'll tickle you longer.

“COMEONONONHAJAHHA!!" You say, laughing but whining that Maria didn't kiss you. She tickles your tummy like an orchestra piano, sinking her claws into the right spots of your tummy. You hands cling to her forearms controlling the urge to keep doing and not tickle her. “No worries my sweetheart, once we're all done I'll give you all the kisses you want." Maria says while tickling you.

She went to your armpits, rummaging her hands thru them with her short nails. You shrieked, the tickling was unbearable but you absolutely loved it. The thrill of the tickling and Maria demanding so much out of you was fun. “NONONOWEDISCUSSEDTGIS.!!", You say, urging her to stop but she instead continues. Your arms fall down to your sides, acting like t-rex arms towards the sensation.

“We only discussed how long I was tickling you, not the spots. Keep those arms up honey or else I'll tickle you longer." Maria says, insisting you'll listen to her. You kept them up, your hands touching the headboard of the bed. Maria was loving this time, although she was worried, wondering if you'll last an hour being tickled. But again you discussed it and you can communicate to her if you've had enough. She gives you a short break, letting you breathe and fanning herself from all the work tickling you.

“Tired already love?" You say, making a snarky remark. Your voice was getting raspy from the laughing. She shakes her head, getting you by attacking your ribs. You were laughing, almost screaming as it was too loud for the door to be open. Her sister was downstairs, studying but secretly finding ways to get money. Maria covers your mouth, muffling your giggles so Natalia won't be disturbed.

“Be careful, my sister is downstairs." She says, sushing you. Yet you tease her once the hand gets released off your pants. You scream loud enough for Natalia to hear as it pisses Maria off.

“HELPHELPSGESHAHHAHHAH." You yell out but Maria ends up tickling you. It didn't help shutting you up because the laughing was just as bad as the yelling. You end up tackling her, tossing her over and using your stealth eye coordination to to make sure she doesn't tickle you back. You poke her a couple of times, hearing her sweet giggles before you purposely lose the tickle fight. She got your stomach when you got curled into a ball, her jumbling fingers scratching around your tummy.

“AHHAHGAHAHHA!!!", You laugh out, your body laying back on the bed. Maria was using all her strength to get you pinned down. Her ponytail went out, showing her long black hair that she was pulling back. She looked more intimidating when her hair in front of her face. Looking like the ghost coming out of the TV, but you can see her smirk covered within the depths of her hair.

“Why must you be so naughty hm?" She asks, her voice feeling faint.

“Don't know." You respond, sort of smiling at her.

The smile gets bigger when she pins your wrist, tickling your sides once again. You laugh loudly, cursing with all your might. Maria sticks her thumb under your pants pocket, digging into your hips. Your feet kick, body swaying with a bit of tears rolling down your face. It didn't alert Maria as she knew this was the goal when she tickles you. “FUCKFUCKFUCK!!", You yell while laughing at her pocket tickles. She enjoys every bit of your suffering, laughing under the long hair and stopping you even if the timer is up. She hugs you, giving you loads of kisses while your out of breath. Coming upstairs was Natalia, feeling irritated but jealous of the two of you having fun.

“Can you two cut it out?? I'm trying to study! Ugh!" Natalia says, leaving with her stomping downstairs. You two continue to be cute with your display of affection until a buzz came from Maria's phone. She picks up the phone from her nightstand and sees it's from her friend, Javi.

“Its Javi, he says he can't find Sofi." She says, looking at you. You both get worried and get dressed into some warm attire, getting ready to leave. Maria brushed her hair, putting it back into a ponytail and grabbing her sneakers from near the bed.

“Hey, want me to tickle you more when we get home?" She asks, lightening up the mood.

“Yes."

[mobbothetrue]

I’m doing an honour mode run of Baldur’s Gate 3 (just barely into the underdark) and it’s been going great

I mean there have been some. Uh. Extremely dicey fights. Including one where I was three hp away from a tpk. but generally okay

One big exception though. So I’m playing a chaotic good tiefling, Sephira, so ofc she sympathizes with the refugees and goes off to the goblin camp to take em out. No problems. Gut gets korilla’d, Minthara I did try to keep alive but she was on 6 hp and the game showed me a button that said ‘hellish rebuke’ and uh. One thing led to another you know how it is. and. I don’t remember the third guy. Zirg? Zorg? Dror Raglzin? Something like that. He got barreled. No problem, easy peasy, let’s go to the grove and get our party :)

I walk in using Karlach, bc usually every time I go to the grove for the party Zevlor will NOT let me talk to any of the npc’s behind him and I wanna do that. So Karlach triggers dialogue and I break Sephira off from the group to chat with some npcs.

At this point, four things worth noting.

One: I (erroneously, it seems) recall there is a way to revive Minthara,,, but I left her body in the goblin camp.

Two: I intended, initially, to ignore the creche entirely and just go through the underdark… but the entrance to the underdark is in the goblin camp.

Three: after you kill the leaders, the entire goblin camp aggros on sight.

Four: I am on a voice call with a friend, meaning, instead of this being something I am thinking inside of my brain I am saying it out loud and as a visual aid to the story I have my map open and my cursor hovering over the fast travel point to the goblin camp.

I’m sure you can guess what I clicked by accident.

Thankfully, (ohmygod), because Sephira was separate from the group when I did that, only she went. Switching back to Karlach and triggering the party got Sephira out. Phew.

Do the party. Nearly accidentally romance Gale for the second playthrough in a row. Drinking, merry times, wheeeee!

Parties over. Next day. I have a bunch of loot to sell so I grab it and exit the camp.

Loading screen. Loading screen. Sounds of initiative being rolled. Loading screen paired with the worst sinking dread I have ever experienced.

It put me back in the fucking goblin camp.

By some sheer stroke of fate, despite the party being together, everyone else went to the emerald grove, but that thirty seconds I spent unable to see… holy shit. So fucking scary. Sephira gets the absolute shit murdered out of her.

How do I make sure this never ever happens again.

Be more careful? Make sure I don’t click things by accident?

I get to level five and proceed to slaughter the entire camp. I used the bridge as a funnel for em, set up a grease puddle to keep them back, had Sephira plant a cloud of daggers right in the middle for them to run into, Gale on standby with a fireball once enough of them clumped up, and Karlach hucking this cool spear I (found? Bought??? I don’t remember) to pick off the little guys.

Astarion is back in camp hanging out with Withers in case things go wrong, but they don’t. In fact, things go so right that the only character to leave the fight worse than they entered is…. Astarion. somehow. Yeah I don’t know what he got up to when I wasn’t looking but he lost like 8 hp.

Anyway long story short: got a problem? Could being careful fix it? No. Wrong. Blender.

[murfpersonalblog]

And in light of all the flack AMC caught after Ep5, even if they originally wanted to take Louis/Claudia's version seriously, more than likely they'll also have to obfuscate/retcon events to make Lestat more palatable for audiences (he's TVC's hero/protagonist/MC after all).

Thus, Louis seems even more unreliable & unhinged, Claudia even more spiteful, and (potentially/most importantly) Armand as even more sinister (if they lean into him fabricating/manipulating memory with his Mind/Spell Gifts & effing with Claudia's diaries). (I've said 1000 times that I DO NOT trust him & what's going on in Dubai.)

"There are three sides to every story: Your side, my side, and the truth. And no one is lying. Memories shared serve each differently." -- Robert Evans

There are elements of Ep5 that are VERY true--from the state of Loustat's coffins, to the busted mantelpiece, to Come to Me. Loustat's 6-year long separation started that very night--WHY? Whatever happened--but it was clearly bad, and Lestat clearly had to grovel several times (the whole kerfluffle over the remastered versions of Come to Me) before they let him move back in. And Les was clearly STILL BAD enough afterwards, that Claudia/Lou went through with the Murder Plot! SOMETHING went down. Ofc Armand, Lou & Claud (hyper)focus on the bad more than the good, but that doesn't negate that there was bad. Book!Lestat (hyper)focused on the good, but he also NEVER DENIED that there was BAD. The details don't matter--oh, Louis lied about how many times we met up in the 1900s, or what I said during this argument, or what color the wallpaper was, blah blah--"was it raining Louis?"--but Lestat never ONCE denied that he AND Louis hit e/o, or that he tried to beat Claudia, or that he didn't DESERVE them turning on him. AR pointed out SO MANY TIMES where Lestat & Louis not only physically fought pre-Claudia; but also where Les tried to beat Claudia (in a FIVE year old's body, not even 10 or 14, ffs) & Louis had to get in the middle & fight Les off to protect her--a la Ep5.

At the end of the day what really matters isn't whether Lestat beat Louis to the white meat & dropped him from the sky and got his throat slit & left in a dump. It's what that says about us viewers/Louis/even Lestat holding Lestat accountable for his actions, AND still having him earn/redeem his place as the likeable/lovable protagonist--becoming a "vampire WORTHY of your love!"

How can AMC spin this so that the people who believe Louis (AND Lestat!) in the books/film/show that Lestat was a villainous fiend who deserved to be roasted alive & dumped keep watching the show, when Lestat takes over the narrative in S3? Rolin Jones has a lot of WORK to do to redeem Lestat--the question is whether he'll Show or Tell enough in 7 episodes to be convincing.

A REDEMPTION Arc is different from a Retcon. Redemption means you did something effed up and are actively atoning/being redeemed. A Retcon is just handwaving all the unsavory elements aside--the show must go on, pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.

Does Lestat deserve eternal vilification (by the fans AND Louis--a la the film, where NoHomo!Loustat never got back together) forgiveness (sympathy for monsters) or acceptance--a la the Prince Lestat trilogy, where Lestat openly acknowledges/accepts that he (and vampires as a whole) are all monsters, while still trying to curate an environment where they can learn to live in HARMONY with e/o--Loustat's problem since Day One.

The Number One rule amongst covens is not to kill other vampires. It's the only one they actually take seriously--not just with Claudia, but with Santino & Thorne, Rhosh & Baudwin, etc etc. In TVC it's a recurring theme from AR's very first book in IWTV to her very last book in BC. The main point is WHY these vampires are killing/fighting e/o. What did they do that was THAT BAD? In the books Claudia's wrath vs Lestat is simply a matter of age & gender dynamics. The show makes their family so much more complex, and there are plenty more reasons Lestat gets his throat slit here--but still boiling down to the simple fact that Lestat did something bad enough to DESERVE it. Rolin Jones openly said they gave Louis "more of a spine" on the show, taking agency into his own hands when Lestat effed round and found out (AS USUAL in the BRAT Prince's books).

The new teaser already confirmed that Les' throat really was slit--he's haunting Louis' memories as he appeared in Ep7 (although the filters & the L'oreal hair & Jesus pose are also pointing to how Louis "editorializes"). I'm assuming that scene happens in Ep1 (the Eastern European leg); before Lou & Claud meet Armand in Paris/Ep2.

If Claudia was the one who really slit Lestat's throat, it falls more neatly in line with the books, and Armand's trial. However, if Louis really did slit Les' throat, that ALSO falls in line with the books AND film, where Louis set Lestat on FIRE and dumped him in the swamp to get nommed on by frikkin GATORS. Y'all think Louis manhandling Lestat in Ep6 & bashing his head in the teaser was bad? They were legit SCARED of this dude!

YES, Louis was still deeply in love with Lestat despite it all, and YES, they got back together & are endgame, but come the eff on, Lestat's Ep5 "villain sequence" is NOT unique to just AMC's version--"it's what's written in the book!"

Some folk stay acting like Loustat never fought a day in their life and Lestat's always been unimpeachable & whatever Louis' saying must be a lie cuz their beautiful blonde blorbo would NEVER. What part of TOXIC ABUSE is not registering?

I've said before that these hugs plot holes and even bigger gaps in time are being chalked up to "memory is a monster," and while I love it as a premise, in practice it is a slippery slope towards relying on unreliable narration as a crutch any time the writers need to pivot in a different direction to keep the torches and pitchforks at bay. I don't envy Rolin his job, istg, cuz YES, it's gonna be interesting seeing where they take Loustat going forward, but I'm here for whatever, so long as Louis isn't thrown under the bus just to make Lestat the "victim" in their relationship, like wtf.

???? Pray tell what is Lestat’s version of events. There’s literally no alternative presented to Louis’s version of iwtv and the most telling line from Lestat himself is saying he deserved to be killed and would’ve done it too. Anne was just a lazy writer who wanted to change the protagonist and had to quickly convince readers to get on board. But then in subsequent books he’s still a rapist and abusive monster so even Anne decided that making him more “”likable”” did not preclude him being an abusive rapist.

[yk-im-no-good]

omfg

ok tbh my (1) follower DONT READ THIS ACTUALLY ILL END MY LIFE AND PUT YOU ON MY SUICIDE NOTE. im being emo under the keep reading

tbfh ive locked myself in my room since like 5/6 pm idfk. but it's cause I DONT KNOW i was and still am in such a poo mood. liek first my mom promised me yesterday she'd take me to the laundromat today so i can wash my plushies MIND YOU I WAS GONNA PAY FOR ALL OF IT (which isnt sm cuz it's just a bunch of fucking QUARTERS so i wasnt gonna b paying a shartload). and pos NEVERMIND cause she's too tired which is! ok well im not mad she's tired cuz ever since my brother and his kids moved in everythings been 100x stressful for everyone especially her. but idk. maybe it's on me for not seeing this soonerbut she acted like she had no idea wht i was talking abt like...ok...and then she was like "later" BUT LATER NEVER CAME. and then my niece broke my pride fan and idk i didn't get mad at her but i was upset asf cuz THAT SHIT MEANS A LOT TO ME ? like idk i got it at my first pride festival w diana and even if it's just cheap plastic it still holds sentimental value to me. so after tht i just went into my room n listen to sad music which made me even MORE SAD . so i started crying. and den i was like ok well fuck it tumblr theme customizing time. so i did tht and liek. throughout the entire time ive been in my room my niece has been banging on my door, my nephews kept trying to get their dog to fight manchiis thru the crack under my door until i yelled @ them to stop. and den my niece kept banging at my door and i ignored it bc liek. SHE ALWAYS DOES THT EVERY SINGLE DAY FOR EVERY LITTLE DAY. and most of the time ill go along w it cuz liek whatever dude. but i fr didn't wanna be bothered bc i was upset and didn't wanna lash out @ anyone . and then she stopped then liek. in the middle of tumblr customizing my brother knocked on my door and asked if i wanted to eat, i said no LOUDLY CUZ I KNOW IT"S HARD TO HEAR WITH MY MUSIC. and then he left me alone for five mins and then he knocked on my door again and was like vale i cant walk. but i didnt even process w he said cause i didn't even fucking hear him. so i was annoyed and walked out and i see him at the end of the hallway laughing and i go in the kitchen and everyones staring at me giggling. and he was like see she came ^___^ !! and my SIL was like omg she did hehehehe. and even my mom was there laughing. and i felt so fucking embarrassed idk like it felt like they were treating me like a kid. and my brother asked if i wanted to eat again and i was like NO . cause what the fuck is wrong with you like actually. dont fucking humiliate me like that bc if u fr cant walk im not gonna be there for u bitch !!!!! and then my niece started chasing me and trying to get into my room and i was just like . no. and then i started crying again but you know i kept at it for my tumblr theme idgaf. coding this custom cursor through the fucking tears idgaf !!!!!!!!!!! and then my mom called me out to the laundry space asking if i could help her move some stuff for a garage sale into her trunk. n i was liek ok. and then my brother comes and looks at me and asks my mom what she's doing. and then he pats my head and asks if i need help w something and i flinch away from him and say no. then he starts helping my mom with the stuff like picking up 3 of the big ass bags of stuff . and i go back in my room cuz i don't want to talk to him i dont even want to be fucking near him. and then i started crying in my room again. and tbh idk if it's bc im on my period or what. but liek im in such a bad fucking mood

[crossbackpoke-check]

I was reading through your old reblogs and sage to say the tags you put on the Oilers shower post are amazing and I would love to read something like that!!

Copying and pasting the tags here (the blue text is the part I was talking about but I left the preceding tags for context if that makes sense?):

#there's another shower right next to the sitting shower 9 is it in the front corner of the picture? is that little glass alcove the entrance #to get in? like there's also horny potential for somebody in the big empty open space & somebody waiting to come in hesitating but you can #see their shadow & their silhouette in the glass the one outside the door knowing that the other is inside all alone showering but still not #coming in because they're giving them privacy etc being the last ones out & this doesn't feel like a connor/leon thing so maybe it's going #in the vague yamo pile but whoever's in the big shower room all alone jerking off & narrating & god knows sound would carry inside that #space & it could be that whoever's outside the door forgot something in there (left soap etc etc) & just happened to walk in on it (and/or #on whatever is going on in the shower stall) & can hear but can't see them but they can see them & can tell that they're watching/listening #through the frosted glass anyway ALSO what i was trying to get to with nuge/yamo (Imao i don't even think i said nuge at first) was like. #omega yamo who goes into heat/is playing through it & yamo gets ejected from the game with the narrative of nuge five for fighting for #defending him (maybe it's the end of the third maybe it's the second & nuge gets a 10 minute major & yamo gets pulled for a concussion check #because of the hit & then the doctors are like Imao stupid no you can't go back out you're in heat [yamo saw nuge fight for him 00] so the #two of them end up in there alone i like the middle of the second bc then nobody's there & wont be for a minute actually) but it's yamo in #the big open space & nuge outside the door checking to make sure he's okay & thinking that he'll be fine he can control it yamo won't smell #because he's in the showers nuge'll just bury his face in soap nuge waiting politely outside the door & yamo is being a MENACE. ohhhhh we're #gonna have to do research but what was the injury that yamo was out for be the original gifset that started this... this is the inciting event #yamo has been bullying nuge for AGES & by god he's gonna get what he wants even if it takes jerking off in the oilers home showers to bait #nuge into doing it. nuge like 'you ok?' has a conversation with yamo etc nuge: 'you gonna be ok to make it home' & yamo says yeah but not

If you were referring to the time Nuge fought Holl, it was a because Yamo took a bodycheck up high and he had to be taken back for concussion protocol just to be safe

^^^real life footage of me receiving and reading this ask 🥺🥰 i would ALSO love to read a fic like that akdhskdjak, but getting this ask made me actually start a doc for omega yamo being a nuisance so thank you (also if you wanted more vague thoughts, here’s the original gifset i reference)

i think i know exactly which fight you mean!! and i think it is saved in my drafts with unhinged thoughts waiting to be released 😇 if i’m right, this is a video that i had to save multiple times on multiple platforms because it was Important To Me

[sukunasweetheart]

childhood friends au with sukuna lmao

little kiddie sukuna is very independent already, he doesnt like mingling with other kids that much and when he does, he ends up fighting them. i think maybe he just usually wanders around by himself or stays inside and reads, idk. 

yuuji tells you that sukuna doesnt like playing with other kids that much but ofc that isnt enough for you to give up. you befriended yuuji first but youd been curious about his twin the whole time lmao.

at first you stood around his window throwing little pebbles and sticks to get his attention but he always opened up to tell you to get lost before shutting it again HAHA happens so often that when you dont show up, he gets a little worried. claims youre annoying but is disappointed when he doesnt hear the clack clack on his window.

one day yuuji just invites you over to his house and the two of you play so rowdily running around while sukunas trying to focus on his picture books being like 🙉

lil babykuna uses difficult words already at that age, so whenever you talk to him you’re like “refuse? what does that mean?” and he is also the type of kid who’d just leave in the middle of a game of hide and seek LMFAO gets disastrous bc if hes the seeker, all the kids r hiding for ages before they realise hes left 😬 or if hes one of the hiders, theyll search for ages HAHAAH what a menace, hes already bored on the count to five

"sukuna, you cant just suddenly leave during hide and seek."

you start following him around when he starts to wander outside and he repeatedly tells you to go away but you dont listen, and eventually you start taking charge which he doesnt like >:( “stop walking ahead of me, loser”

anyway the two of you stumble into a nice hiding spot in the woods, that you found. imagine him telling u like "u better not tell anybody else about this place" and then youre like 😐 whyre you making the rules when i found it smh smh

and then you get lost on the way back. youre like "o-okay sukuna, lets hold hands so i dont lose you" and hes like 💢 ha? later on, youre like "dont be scared sukuna, im sure we can get home" and hes like "whos the one thats scared 🙄"

this is a bit random but i definitely want to add how yuuji often says “thats why you dont have any friends, sukuna” in here

whenever he accidentally upsets you he cant think of anything else to do other than pick a random flower from the ground and hand it to you while awkwardly kicking at the dirt bc hes not used to admitting wrong

and surprisingly, it works bc youre simple minded and you accept the flower

after its snowed a lot, you come outside and draw sukunas face on the ground with a stick. it basically looks like >:( he looks at it and is like “who’s that.”

going into highschool, sukuna gets a massive growth spurt and he’s already over 185cm omg

maybe you’re upset again over something and crying behind the school building when he comes around (looking for you). You're both squatting, on the back there's a brick wall, and you (optional) crying and he's holding up a single flower, looking like 😠 but with 💧 all tsundere awkward, telling you to stop crying already

you look at the damn flower and start cry-laughing telling him that he hasnt changed at all! he gets mad when you laugh at him, but he says “neither have you” bc damn, the flower worked once again

sukuna wiping your tears away with his sleeve 🥺

thank you for reading my gibberish

Masterlist

[arodabi]

Whats an aromantic flag and why you should include it in your pride posts

disclaimer: i know theres fighting every year about who should and shouldn’t be included in pride posts, this isn’t to argue with people who just hate aspec ppl, this is an informational post. don’t send me bullshit about it

Why should you include aro flags?

many people believe that aromanticism is covered under the asexual flag, so if they include that they’re including aros, however that’s not the case. aro and ace people share the aspec community, but one identity does not fall under the other. It’s less like using the trans flag as an umbrella for all trans and nonbinary people even if there’s a separate nonbinary flag, and more like using the transmasc pride flag to represent all transmascs and transfems. Aros are just not covered under the ace flag because both groups are separate identities. people can be aro and ace but not all aros are ace.

aro is also an incredibly important identity for a lot of people, something we take a lot of pride in. we get relegated to “minor or add on identity” all the time because people keep thinking of us as the -romantic version of asexual. we have multiple terms, multiple flags, and a huge array of different aro experiences, we are not a subset of asexuality and many of us wish for that to be more respected.

last on the reasons of why you should include aros in pride posts is that we have no larger umbrella flag, unless we’re counting the rainbow flag. the aro flag is the umbrella flag for arospec identities. if you don’t include it then we aren’t being included. and this isn’t me telling you you have to include an aro option for everything you make (tho that would be nice) ppl have the right to choose what flags they want to include. but theres been many times when i see people add  flags representing all parts of the community except aro, and then add on smaller more niche flags. i don’t want this to come across as another post like “how dare you include X flag but not Y flag!!!” because i think everyone should have the joy of representation, i just think many people don’t realize they’re even leaving aros out. either through lack of awareness or lack of knowledge on what the aro flag actually is, and that’s what i wanna help with this post.

What even is the aro flag?

Let’s start with what it’s not:

[ID: a flag with four horizontal stripes. from the top down they are green, yellow, orange and black. End ID]

This was the first proposed aro flag. We do not use it anymore for a couple reasons, the main one is that it resembled another countries flag too closely and was getting confused. I’d think this one would have died out by now but i literally just saw a post include it today.

[ID: A flag with five horizontal stripes. from top to bottom the colors are dark green, light green, yellow, grey, and black. End ID]

This was the second popular aro flag. It is very close to the main aro flag now except the middle stripe is yellow. That stripe was changed due to causing some people sensory problems. This one is sometimes still accidentally used, probably because it looks very close to the main flag, but it’s not the main aro flag either.

[ID: A flag with five horizontal stripes. from top to bottom the colors are black, grey, white, light green, and dark green. End ID]

I’ve actually seen this flag used a lot by people not very knowledgeable about aros. This is a flipped version of the aro flag. I also for the life of me can’t find an example of this but i’ve seen more than once a version that is flipped and removes a stripe of green so it looks like a recolored ace flag. These are pretty common, enough for me to have seen multiple people selling merch with this incorrect flag. I think it comes from people thinking the aro flag is the same as the ace one which does start with black at the top and has only four stripes.

[ID: A flag with seven horizontal stripes. from top to bottom the colors are black, grey, white, green, white, grey, and black. End ID]

Yeah, this is the agender flag, not the aro flag. I see these get mixed up all the time. It’s not hard so see why with similar colors and a white grey black gradient, but as someone who is agender and aro, it kinda gets on my nerves when people mix these up. Also no this is not the same color palette as the aro flag. I’ve seen people make designs labeled as agender/aromantic that just use the agender color palette. The aro flag has two greens and they’re both different than the agender green.

[ID: Two flags next to each other. The first one has five horizontal stripes. from top to bottom the colors are orange, light orange, white, light blue, dark blue. The second flag has eight horizontal stripes. from top to bottom the colors are dark green, light green, white, grey, black, grey, white, and purple. End ID]

These are two common aroace flag designs. These flags are used by a lot of people and you might see them included in pride posts. These are good flags, however, they should not be used to represent all aros. Including an aroace flag does not mean you’re including all aros and all aces, it means you’re including just aroaces. There’s plenty of aros who aren’t ace and aces who aren’t aro. It’d be like putting a gay trans flag in a post and saying its there to represent all gay and all trans people, when the flag is usually used to represent only people who are both gay and trans. Again, these flags are not bad, and them being included in pride posts is good actually, but they should not be used to represent all aro and all ace people.

Now let’s go over what actually is the aro flag:

[ID: A flag with five horizontal stripes. From top to bottom the colors are dark green, light green, white, grey, and black. End ID]

This is the main aro flag. It’s the one most widely used and recognized. The color meanings are dark green and light green representing the spectrum of aro identities, white meaning friendship, and grey and black representing the spectrum of sexual identities in the aro community.

But wait there’s more!

The aro identity is a spectrum, meaning theres more identities under aromantic, and they have their own flags too. If you really wanna go wild and include some other aro flags heres some more. (this is not a full list of all arospec identities, just some i see around the most. feel free to look into more arospec identities and flags! also all of these definitions are coming from me and my personal knowledge of aro identities, i do not identify as any of these though, only as aromantic, so if i give the wrong definition please tell me so i can fix it!)

[ID: A flag with five horizontal stripes. From top to bottom the colors are dark green, light green, white, yellow, and dark yellow. End ID]

This is the alloaro flag. Alloaros are aros who aren’t ace. They deserve more support and attention because they’re really amazing members of the aro community.

[ID: A flag with five horizontal stripes. From top to bottom the colors are dark green, grey, white, grey, and dark green. End ID]

This is the greyromantic flag. Greyromantic means someone who feels romantic attraction rarely. The term greyromantic is also sometimes used to mean aro identities that still feel some form of romantic attraction.

[ID: A flag with four horizontal stripes. From top to bottom the colors are black, green, aqua, and grey. End ID]

the quoiromantic or WTFromantic flag. It means someone who can’t or doesn’t want to tell the difference between platonic and romantic attraction basically. It’s got a special place in my heart bc i used to id as quoi.

[ID: A flag with five horizontal stripes. From top to bottom the colors are red orange, orange, yellow, white, and black. End ID]

This is the Lithromantic flag. Lithromantic means someone who feels romantic attraction but doesn’t want it reciprocated, or may no longer feel romantic attraction when it is reciprocated.

[ID: A flag with a black, sideways triangle on the left side pointing right and three horizontal stripes. The first stripe from the top is a thick white stripe, the next stripe is thin and dark green, and the bottom stripe is thick and grey. End ID]

The demiromantic flag. Someone who is demiro doesn’t feel romantic attraction until they have formed a deep emotional connection with someone.

And there’s many more arospec identities!

I hope i’ve helped to clear up some misconceptions about aros and our flags! We’re not under the ace umbrella, we’re our own community. We all have different experiences, different relationships to our identity, and I hope to see more people represent aros this year!

Have a happy pride month!

[eddie-van-munson]

Hear me out, Eddie with a werewolf s/o or like demodog shifter or something. Like maybe she was yk experimented on like eleven and she can shift into a werewolf demodog kinda thing? Idk I think he would have an interesting reaction

(Warnings: Series Typical Violence, Refrences to Hawkins Lab Emperimentation, Cursing, Mentions of Blood)

I gave Steve his bat back bc how else is he gonna fight Demodogs!!!

-So I think they would find you in the Upside Down

-Maybe it's Steve, Nancy ,Robbin, and Eddie and they've just fought off four or five Demodogs.

-There's one left and Steve hits it one last time with his bat really hard in its hind leg.

-It runs off into the woods, injured, taking a few nails with it.

-They don't think much of it.

-Later on they're trying to get to Nancy's house (still in the upside down) when they see another swarm of bats coming, and they sprint into the woods to hide at skull rock.

-They are more than a little surprised to find someone there.

-"Holy shit...Who is that?" Steve curses as they run towards limp form.

-You're laying beneath skull rock, absolutely motionless and naked, curled in on yourself.

-Eddie puts a hand on your back and he can feel that you're still breathing, but you're trembling like crazy.

-Your hip is like, fucked.

-He pulls off his thicker leather jacket, pulling it on you carefully to keep you warm. Nancy drapes the denim one over your middle, trying to protect your modesty, but leaves your hip exposed.

-You're covered all over in dirt and blood. It's streaked through your hair. Nancy sweetly tries to rub some dirt from your cheeks.

-Eddie studies your hip, "We've got to get her out of here. She's lost a ton of blood."

-Robbin reaches over to your wrist, "Her pulse is really faint. We don't have a lot of time."

-"Oh my god." Steve whispers.

-"What?"

-"Oh my god..."

-"What is it!?" Eddie nearly yells.

-"Her hip..."

-"Yeah. I know. It's fucking gonna fall off or some shit if we don't get her to-"

-Steve reaches over, picking up something that's laying on the rock beside you, covered in blood.

-A nail.

-"This is...This is from my bat."

-There's a silence. Eddie takes a closer look at your hip.

-"Holy shit" Looking now, it's very obvious that the gashes littered over you are from Steve's bat.

-"Is she a-?"

-"I mean, she has to be."

-"But how?"

-Nancy lifts your wrist, running her thumb over a little black tattoo. 003.

-"I-It's like El's."

-"Oh my god."

-Nancy tears a strip of fabric from the leg of her pants and ties it tightly around your hip, keeping you from losing any more blood as they bring you back.

-Eddie and Steve take turns carrying you bridal style through the woods until they get you to the trailer and through the portal.

- When you wake up, you're in a bed, surrounded by pink and white striped walls. Everything hurts.

-You realize...you're clean. Oh my god. Your hair is clean. Someone has washed off your skin and bandaged you where your hurt and given you a pair of pajamas.

-You reach over weakly for the glass of water sitting on the bedside table and drink the whole thing.

-You study your hip as best you can through the wrappings.

-The bedroom door opens, and you startle a little when a tall boy with long dark curls wanders in.

-His eyes go big when he sees you're awake

-"Hi! Oh!! Hello! Good morning!"

-He sees you're a little nervous so he pulls up a chair and sits beside you, trying to explain what's happened.

-"-so basically...we think someone experimented on you and turned you into one of those ugly motherfuckers who tried to eat us. Not that you're ugly!! Not at all! I just meant...Well, you were kind of green? And? Toothy?"

-"My theory is that when Steve hit you, you lost a lot of blood, and your body became too week to hold its "Demodog" form, you know?"

-You frown, "D-Demodog?"

-Needless to say they've got a lot of explaining to do.

***********

[leahblackk]

I have not sent in a request jn like 6 years but okay -

something maybe a lil big angsty but like spencer is being over the top sarcastic with reader. maybe they’re in an argument over his job or something some argument and Spencer is just being very rude and sarcastic to the point where reader can’t tell if it’s a joke or not, and in the midst of their argument spencer is called away on a case, and comes home to see reader has left. (if u wanna fluff it up at the end he can apologize profusely and they can cuddle it out but up to you leah bc your mind is genius)

Hurtful words

(Not my gif)

Summary: a little blurb by my local amazing ideas giver, Alex. Let’s all say thank you Alex for this idea.

Couple: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Warnings: Spencer being a little shit. And mentions of being injured because of gunshot. And many mistakes I’m sorry :)

Oh my god yes! I feel like I haven’t done a blurb in years. Your blurb ideas are the ones that keep me going. And you are the genius!! Your ideas are extremely amazing and I’m happy I can make them true <3

Spencer Reid.

What a mystery that man was.

Y/n met Spencer as a sweet young man with glasses and cute jumpers. A man who didn't catch certain social things. He didn’t understood sarcasm in certain occasions or indirect messages or double intentions. Of course, he knew what it was, but he didn’t know how to act with it or how to use it.

Until he learned how to be passive-aggressive.

The first time Y/n ever saw Spencer being passive-aggressive with someone was with JJ when the Lauren/Emily thing happened. Spencer, of course, was very mad about it. JJ was his best friend, the person he most trusted besides his girlfriend. He couldn’t understand why he couldn’t know. It wasn’t like he was going to tell anyone! He had the right to know that his friend whom he loved so much wasn’t buried five feet underground! He cried on his girlfriend floor for hours, and when he was too embarrassed by her looking at him, he went to JJ’s house. She saw him, she saw him crying his eyes out for her and she didn’t say a damn thing! Of course he was going to be mad.

Y/n never thought she had to worry about him being like that with her.

Spencer always has been a sweet man. But he isn’t when he’s under stress, mad or sad. The pressure over him made his IQ of 187 slashed to 63. He couldn’t think straight. And Spencer never worried about him being like that with his girlfriend. He didn’t had any reasons to be. She was all nice to him and cared about him.

But now, things changed while they were fighting in their shared apartment.

Y/n has been injured on a case after being reckless, or that was the way his boyfriend thought, but to be honest she saved a life, even if that got her hurt. She didn’t care. She would do it again. And that petrified Spencer.

Even if her doctor told her she could go back to the field. Spencer wasn’t going to have any of it. That was why they were fighting. Neither of them liked to deal with strong emotions. He wanted to say he didn’t want her to be there because he was scared he was going to lose her. He couldn’t lose her. She was his everything. His glue putting him together when the world tried to bring him down and shatter his heart. She was the thing that keeps him going. But instead of saying that, he was treating her badly and Y/n on her side wasn’t going to have any of it.

“Why can’t you understand, Spencer? I’m not a child. I can perfectly take care of myself.” She said putting her clothes on her go-bag while Spencer took them out.

He chuckled, “Perfectly take care of yourself? Yeah of course I believe you. When did you take care of yourself? When you put yourself in front of the unsub and he shot you? Yeah, Y/n, that’s taking care of yourself.”

She frowned.

That hurt.

“Excuse Spencer but you’re not no one to tell me what to do.”

“I’m your boyfriend!” He said, hurt.

“And? That doesn’t give you any right to tell me what to do. I’m a grown-up, Reid. If you didn’t notice. I’m not a child you can take care of.”

“Sometimes I think you are, you know?” He then looked at her, “You act worse than a child sometimes. Being so reckless and putting yourself in danger.”

“Like you haven’t done that yourself either.”

“I have! But I knew what I was doing. You weren’t thinking!”

“When is gonna be the day you understand you can’t tell me what to do?”

“When you stop being so reckless and actually take care of yourself,” He crossed his arms over his chest, “But apparently that’s not happening.”

She sighed with anger and looked at him. Throwing a shirt over his face and going downstairs to the kitchen to drink water and calm herself. Spencer followed her and entered the kitchen taking a glass of water as well.

She didn’t even look at him. He wanted her looking at him. He wanted to feel those eyes on him even if they were full of anger.

So he made it in the wrong way.

“And you said you’re not a child,” he murmured referring to her throwing the shirt on his face.

“What was that?” She turned around and look at him.

“You perfectly heard it, Y/n.”

“I can’t believe you’re the one calling me a child. Look at you,” she moved her hands up and down in front of him to make a point, “I’m going to that case you like it or not.”

“I wouldn’t risk the team to be with you on the case. They might end it up injured with your recklessness.”

Silence.

The words Spencer throw made echo in both lovers ears.

Reid bit his bottom lip regretting the words as soon as they came out of his mouth. Trying to take them back but the damage was already done.

Y/n looked at him without any emotion. Until her eyes start to burn and the tears came out. She lifted her hand with anger and wiped them off feeling her cheeks getting warmer and warmer.

Spencer looked at her and his heart ached. Why did he said that? She was a great agent. He was just scared of losing her and if by telling her that stuff, she would stay home safe, he would do it. But he regretted it now. He regretted it so much.

She chuckled without any humour and licked her bottom lip, tears coming down her face again.

But she let them now. Too tired.

Spencer’s first instinct was to step forward to her, but she stayed back putting her hands in front of him, to stop him.

She didn’t want to be touched by him.

He looked down.

He spends his life touching her. Loving her and worshipping her body. Touching her soft skin with soft moves, carefully not wanting to break her as she was a porcelain doll. But now, she didn’t want to be touched by him.

And Spencer understood.

He did.

It was all his fault at the end of the day. He made her stayed back when he wanted to pull her in. It was his fault. “I don’t want you to touch me,” she murmured and passed him taking her arms close to her so they wouldn’t brush his skin.

Spencer’s tears came down now.

I don’t want you to touch me.

She didn’t want him to touch her.

But all he wanted to do was touch her and let her know he didn’t mean those words. How could he? She was perfect in everything she did, her job included. Mostly her job.

Spencer didn’t notice how much time had passed while he stood frozen in the middle of their kitchen until he felt his phone buzzed. He took it out of his pocket. It was Morgan.

Hey Spencer. I know you love your girlfriend so much but we have to hurry! People are dying you know? Not everything is vanilla and roses like you two.

Spencer chuckled. Only if he knew.

He went upstairs with careful moves while he pressed his palms together trying to stop the trembling. He mostly did.

All her clothes were now in the closet, her go-bag as well. She wasn’t going to the case. It wasn’t a surprise. He knew he would achieve what he wanted after saying that. But now it didn’t felt right.

He moved closer to where she was. On their shared bed. He sat down. He was about to open his mouth to say something but she did it first. “Please don’t say anything. You have said enough and I think your thoughts are very clear,” her voice sounds broken. And was all his fault, “Just go. Tell the team I haven’t made full recovery yet.”

He nodded even if she couldn’t see him because she was hiding under the blankets.

What Spencer didn’t notice was the way after saying those words, her hands end it up on her mouth trying the sobs not to come out. She knew if Spencer heard those he would stay with her, even if they just argued. It was Spencer at the end of the day.

He would do anything for her.

Spencer full of guilty took his go-bag and walked directly to the door, looking at her once more.

He wanted to ask.

He needed to know.

You’re gonna be here when I come back?

You’re gonna still be here when I come back?

But the words never left his mouth. They got stuck on his throat. The pain and the tears as well. He needs to say he still loved her. That no matter what he still loved her. He loves her.

He-

He loves her.

But he couldn’t. So he turned around, and left.

When the front door closed Y/n finally let the sobs out.

…

The young doctor tried to avoid all the questions on why he was so grumpy and distracted.

The answer to those questions was “I just had a huge fight with the love of my life and I’m worried she leaves while I’m here. Even if she have every right to I’m still scared because she’s the only thing that keeps me going.”

But of course, he didn’t said it.

He just dismissed everything saying he didn’t have good sleep which didn’t make things better because later on, he was going to be teased by Emily and Morgan.

And when the case was finally closed, he ran to the closest flower shop to buy her favourite flowers and then he went to her favourite restaurant to get her favourite food to then ran to the metro all the way to their shared apartment.

He tried to manage to open the door with all the things in his hand but he couldn’t so he put his satchel and the flowers on the wooden floor, and he was about to put the food as well but then he thought about the germs even if the food was protected, so he put it above his satchel and he was finally able to open the door.

The lights were off which wasn’t weird of her. She wasn’t a lover of the lights of the apartment, always reminding Spencer that they needed to change them as they were too bright, but they never had time to do so, but that was exactly what Spencer was going to do tomorrow.

He then took off his shoes and put them next to the others, but her shoes weren’t there which was weird but he didn’t think too much about it. Maybe she forgot to take them off.

Spencer, then, open the door, even more, to put all the things inside of the house. He put his satchel on the little table next to the shoes and his keys as well.

Her keys weren’t there.

Spencer’s heart stopped.

Her keys weren’t there.

He breathed in and out softly trying to calm his desperate heart beating faster and faster on his chest wanting to get out. He put his palms together trying to stop the trembling but this time was impossible.

He took the flowers with him and went upstairs closing the front door behind him and he open the door of their shared bedroom.

She wasn’t there.

She-

She wasn’t there.

Where did she go?

Did she leave?

No.

No.

“No,” Spencer whispered the tears coming down his eyes.

She wouldn’t. Even if she was mad. She wouldn’t do that as everyone else did without any more explanation than a letter or a note.

A letter.

He needed to find the letter.

He searched on their bed and the tables beside their side of the bed. He didn’t look in their closet or bathroom because she wouldn’t leave that there.

Spencer went downstairs to the kitchen looking for the letter on the dining table and outside of the refrigerator. But there was none.

He, then walked to the living room looking and moving things making a mess.

He needed to read the letter.

She must have left a letter.

Everyone else left a letter.

And the door open but he didn’t heard it because of his desperation and the sound of his heartbeat making echo in his hears

He needed to find the letter.

He turned around and she saw her. Standing there with a sundress and her hair tied. She looked beautiful. She always looked beautiful, but she had a frown on her face looking with confusion at her surroundings, the mess he just made and then back to Spencer repeatedly.

And then he understood he needed to explain himself. “I-I,” he looked down and closed his eyes full of tears for a few seconds. She saw the trembling on his hands. She made a step forward from instinct but then she stopped as she remembers what happened between them. He looked up at her. He couldn’t get the words out of his mouth but she waited for him to talk, patiently while he tried to find the correct words. “I came here right away. Well not right away because I went first to the flower shop and then to your favourite restaurant,” he rambled looking at her. She didn’t stop him. She didn’t have any intention to stop him. Instead, she listens carefully. She always listens, “you weren’t at home and I’ve been nervous all these past days because I thought you would leave, and you had every right to and then I came back here and you weren’t and I looked for a-a note or letter.”

Her heart shattered.

People that left his life always left a note or a letter. She remembers when he told her that.

“I didn’t leave,” he nodded. She didn’t. She stayed. “Penelope called me and she needed help with something and then she asked me if I knew why you were acting so weird and I talked to her for a while and I didn’t realize how late it was. I’m sorry.”

He shocked his head. Stepping forward to her. “You don’t have to apologize. I’m the one who needs to apologize. I shouldn’t have treated you so badly and I want you to understand that I didn’t mean a single word because you are so great and so amazing in everything you do. I would never mean those words,” now was her turn to nodded, “I just said that because after you being injured, I didn’t want you to hurt yourself or even get killed. I’m selfish, yeah I know that. But you’re my everything, Y/n. Without you, I don’t know what will I do, you’re the only one who keeps me together and the one who brings light to my darkness. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” he took her hands looking for permission first, “I said those things because I knew you would stay home, but I didn’t mean them I swear I didn’t.”

She nodded again and hugged him. He sobbed while he hugged her as his life depends on it. “I know. It’s okay love. I won't leave you I promise,” she sobbed too. “I love you.”

“I love you more, so so much.”

And they held each other while they sobbed and repeat those three little words back and forth.

They were home now.

They were okay now.

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Invisible Assistance

Prompts: If ur taking requests do you think maybe you could write about the sanders sides as kids where Virgil subtly looks out for the others when they’re afraid of things (cuz he can tell as anxiety)? Like for example he plugs in nightlights in the hallway bc Logan is afraid of the dark. He leaves sticky notes with compliments out for Roman bc Roman’s afraid of rejection/falling short. He stitched together little stuffies for patton bc he’s hates being lonely. Those kinda things. Virgil would have to do it discreetly bc the other sides wouldn’t accept the help if it was from anxiety (even if they really really wanted the things that would help). And maybe the other sides find out after they accept Virgil bc he says something offhandedly about it? However you wanna write it tho!!! <3 - renjunstolemykidneys

Can I request a Sanders sides fic where one of the sides is touch averse? - anon

Oh is it kid fic time? it's kid fic time!

Read on Ao3

Warnings: none! fluff land down below bois

Pairings: it is found family to the MAX

Word Count: 3836

When one of the others is afraid, a patch on the back of Virgil’s neck tingles.

It doesn’t hurt, which is good, because that would be really annoying, but it tingles.

Or, five times Virgil helps one of the other Sides when they're afraid, and one time they show him how much they appreciate it.

When one of the others is afraid, a patch on the back of Virgil’s neck tingles.

It doesn’t hurt, which is good, because that would be really annoying, but it tingles. He used to be scared of it. He ran to Janus the first time it happened because he didn’t know what he did wrong, he didn’t know why this thing was happening to him. Janus had calmed him down, walked him through his breathing exercises, and said that it was one of his powers.

“Powers? What powers?”

“I can grow extra arms and I can tell when people are lying,” Janus had said, “those are my powers. You can tell when people are afraid.”

And Virgil could. There was a small patch on the back of his neck that acted like a fear detector, where he could tell what was wrong. Over time, he had figured out how to tell who it was that was afraid.

Logan’s fear felt really fuzzy.

Not like the soft blankets that Patton likes from the hall closet, but the kinda weird static that the TV has sometimes when the video games won’t load properly. It’s fuzzy. It’s kind of hard to think. Sometimes, if it’s really bad, it gets kind of hard to see.

Logan doesn’t like being afraid and Virgil doesn’t blame him. Being afraid isn’t fun, that’s why he doesn’t like it.

Logan’s fear is fuzzy because Logan is Logic. Logan makes things clearer, easier to understand, because that’s his power. He’s really good at it. When Virgil gets afraid for himself, Logan is really good at explaining why it’s not so scary after all. Sometimes it doesn’t always work, but it works most of the time. But Virgil can’t do what Logan does for him because that’s not his power. He just knows when Logan is scared and fuzzy.

At first, Virgil thought it was something wrong with his glasses. After all, Logan needs them to see, doesn’t he? So if his glasses are fuzzy, he’ll be fuzzy. But Logan uses the glasses to see outside, not inside. So it isn’t the glasses. So he starts trying to figure out what Logan is scared of.

Then he notices that Logan’s light stays on all night while everybody else turns their light off.

He mumbles something about it to Logan the next day and Logan tells him that’s because he likes to read at night and so he needs the light. But Janus said his mouth felt weird after Logan said that so Logan’s lying.

Oh. Maybe Logan’s scared of the dark.

Virgil goes back to his room and opens his closet. He scrambles up on the step stool—putting his arms out for balance like Patton and Janus said—and reaches for the box of night lights. He pulls the cardboard down and rifles through it, looking for ones that Logan would like. He comes across a collection of night lights that Thomas saw at the space museum—what was it called? He pulls one closer and reads off the label.

“Planetarium,” he mumbles, “got it.”

It’s a set of nine night lights, one for each planet, and a big one to be the Sun. He scurries out into the hall and checks to make sure no one is around. There’s no one there. He tucks the box under his bed and scampers off. He needs to count how many outlets there are to see how many lights he’ll need.

There is one by the bathroom, two in the middle of the hall, one by Patton’s door, one by Roman’s door, one by Remus’s door, one by Janus’s room, one by Logan’s room, one by his room, and one at the top of the stairs.

One…two…three…four…five…six…seven…eight…nine…ten.

Perfect.

Virgil hurries back to the cardboard box and makes sure there are ten night lights. There are. Now all he needs to do is figure out where each one has to go.

The Sun is Logan’s room. Obviously. Mercury can go with Roman because those two love to play together. That would make Venus Remus because the twins are very close too.

Patton is the Earth because he takes care of all of them. Janus can be Jupiter because he likes being the tallest.

The bathroom can be Uranus.

The stairs can be Neptune because Logan likes that Neptune spins on its side, which is really cool. And the stairs are kind of sideways so it matched.

Virgil holds the last night light in his hands. Pluto. It’s small, a kind of purple-gray. It matches the sleeves of his pajamas. As he walks back to his room, he plugs the Pluto into the outlet next to his door.

Perfect.

He doesn’t feel Logan getting scared by the dark anymore and the Sun nightlight is really bright.

2.

Roman’s fear makes his neck feel hot. Almost like he’s embarrassed by something or he’s ashamed of something. He doesn’t like it, and he can imagine that Roman doesn’t like it very much either.

Roman is really loud. He really likes singing at the top of his lungs, even when there are like four other people in the room that are trying to do something. He really likes talking loudly too, even when they’re trying to do something. Sometimes Virgil thinks that Roman is too loud, but he’d never say that to him. That would be mean.

Roman gets hurt a lot. He says it’s because of his quests in the Imagination but Janus doesn’t believe him. Not about all of them. And that would be a weird place to get bruises. Virgil goes in there too sometimes, to play with Remus and Roman or to train with Roman. One of his other powers is fighting the things that come to hurt Thomas so he has to be ready. And he only gets bruises on his arms and legs from that.

Roman gets them everywhere. And Roman’s a good fighter! So it doesn’t make sense that he’s really hurt all the time.

Virgil does figure out that Roman gets hurt when Thomas feels bad about something. When Roman and Thomas have been working really hard on something and it doesn’t go well, Roman goes off into the Imagination and he looks hurt when he comes back. That’s when Virgil feels that he’s scared.

When they get a bit older and Virgil can start confidently naming it ‘rejection,’ he starts to notice that Roman slumps more when he’s hurt. Like it physically hurts to stand up straight. Which is really bad, because Roman loves to sing but you can’t sing properly if you don’t stand up straight. And if Roman can’t sing, he can’t make himself feel better.

Virgil also notices that Roman really doesn’t like it when he’s not sure what to do.

Virgil isn’t the best person to go to for this, because he’s always upset that things are going to happen and they’re going to happen and they don’t know how. But he notices that Logan, who always knows what’s good to pay attention to, doesn’t help either. Patton is the only one who seems to be able to help. And he helps by telling Roman that he’s doing a good job, that they will help, that it’s okay. Roman likes being told that it’s okay.

Virgil can get behind that.

But Roman isn’t always around when Virgil remembers to tell him that, so he decides to write it down.

On his desk, there is a pack of red post-it notes. Virgil stashes one in his pocket all the time with a pen. When he thinks of something that Roman should hear, he writes it down and sticks it on Roman’s door. He doesn’t go into Roman’s room, that’s mean. And rude. He knows better.

Things like ‘I like your singing.’ Or ‘The pancakes you made were really good.’ Or ‘You did a good job today.’ That kind of thing. Sometimes it’s just ‘I like you.’ Because Roman is good and Virgil likes him. A lot.

When he feels Roman start to get afraid, he goes and writes it down and sticks it on the door. Then he retreats to his room and waits, holding his breath, until he hears the creak of a door down the hall and the fear goes away. If he waits a few more minutes, normally he’ll hear Roman start to sing.

Then he lets himself smile.

3.

Patton’s fear feels really heavy. Like…really heavy. It kind of hurts to breathe sometimes if it catches Virgil off-guard. So he really doesn’t like Patton’s fear.

What makes it harder is that Patton is really good at hiding when he’s actually afraid. He screams really loudly when there’s a spider or when something surprises him—thank you, Remus—but when he’s afraid, it’s harder to tell.

But Virgil sometimes catches him sitting in the living room by himself, watching TV, and he’ll be afraid. Not of what’s on the TV, but of something else. So he’ll come downstairs and ask if Patton’s okay and Patton will say he’s fine, but then Virgil will curl up in a chair and that won’t be true. The fear will still be there. It’s only when someone else comes down that it goes away.

Virgil remembers very clearly the day that he spent an hour sitting downstairs with Patton and left to go to the bathroom. He had come back downstairs to see Janus next to Patton and Patton wasn’t afraid anymore. He’d gone back to his room and thought about it.

Virgil couldn’t help with this as he was, but the others could. Patton was afraid of…of being left alone?

Okay. Okay, Virgil could make things that would make Patton feel less alone.

He was never really good at making things, not like the twins were, but he was good at fixing things when they got ripped. When he wakes up in the middle of the night from nightmares he knows how to fix his blankets and pillows and pajamas. So he takes the scraps of fabric he has from all the ones he still had to fix and frowns.

Patton likes frogs. So he draws a frog on the blue sheet and cuts it out carefully. He folds the fabric over and cuts out another one. He stitches them wrong sides together, leaving a little bit at the bottom. He turns it inside out and fills it with stuffing from the pillow. Then he sews the bottom back up. It’s a little frog plushie, and it’s for Patton.

He leaves it outside Patton’s door to a squeal of delight.

When he feels Patton get lonely again, he makes another one. This time it’s from the galaxy pillow and he makes a cat. The cat’s eyes don’t come out right when he draws them but they kind of look like glasses. Logan’s glasses.

The next time, he makes a lion. The lion is fuzzy because the slipper that was falling apart worked really well for a mane. He gives it Roman’s favorite red sash because he accidentally cut the fabric in the wrong place and needed to keep the stuffing inside.

After the lion, he makes a snake. He gives it a little paper hat like the one Janus wears. He giggles when he sees the final thing, it kind of looks like it belongs in Phineas and Ferb. Agent J.

When Patton gets really afraid, he looks at the last bit of the green fabric he has and chews his lip. Can he…maybe he can make an octopus. Like Remus. It takes a long time and he accidentally pricks his fingers a couple of times, but he gets a sloppy-looking octopus. After a moment, he grabs the pen and draws a smile with lots of sharp teeth. Like Remus.

Patton doesn’t feel so lonely after that.

4.

Remus’s fear feels muffled. Not like it’s there but it’s not really, but it gets hard for Virgil to hear things. Not like Logan’s fear where everything is fuzzy, but like someone has their hands over his ears. He doesn’t like it. It makes his own head louder.

He notices that Roman is loud but Remus is louder. Remus is constantly making noise, not like Roman’s outbursts, but always. He’s tapping a table or stomping his foot or humming to himself. He’s never quiet and when he’s quiet it’s bad.

He remembers watching Roman and Remus come out of the Imagination once and Remus hadn’t made a noise. The twins had scurried off to Remus’s room and they hadn’t come out until breakfast the next morning. Virgil’s head had been really loud all night because everything else had been muffled.

Remus isn’t quiet. Remus doesn’t like the quiet. Remus hates the quiet. Remus is scared of the quiet.

Virgil doesn’t like the quiet either, but he can’t exactly make noise without worrying that he’s disturbing everyone else. But Remus doesn’t have that problem. Remus is loud and he likes that he’s disturbing everyone else.

But maybe Virgil can help.

There is another box on his desk full of fidget toys. Virgil doesn’t use them most of the time because they’re stuck in the back of the desk but he does like the fidget cube. Maybe Remus would like it too?

He figures out how to get another one and makes it green and black. He puts it outside Remus’s door.

Well, it’s not quiet anymore.

But Remus isn’t afraid, so that’s fine.

It’s all fine.

Virgil remembers too late that the reason he doesn’t use the fidget cube that often is because he can’t stand the sound of the clicking and the squeaking of the cube. But Remus isn’t afraid anymore and he has his headphones.

So it’s fine.

5.

Janus’s fear is cold.

It’s probably why Virgil took so long to work out that Janus was scared of anything. Janus didn’t like to admit that he was scared of things. Janus didn’t like to admit much of anything if he’s being real, but he really doesn’t like admitting when he’s scared. And Virgil is used to being cold so he probably didn’t notice it for a long time.

But Janus does get scared and when he does, the back of Virgil’s neck feels cold.

Janus is like a snake the same way Remus is like an octopus and Patton is like a frog. If Logan is right and he normally is, it’s like how Virgil is like a spider and Roman is like a lion and Logan is like a cat. Which means that there are certain things that Janus does that are like a snake.

Even if he has too many arms to be a snake. Like…way too many.

Janus has a forked tongue. Remus is jealous and Patton thinks it’s kind of weird. Janus has scales. Roman thinks they’re strange and Logan thinks they’re interesting. Janus hisses sometimes when he’s tired or upset. They all think it’s cute. Janus doesn’t like that either.

They’re watching a documentary for a science class and snakes come up. Logan leans forward with his notebook, Patton grabs his juice box, and Remus starts thinking of ideas to do with Roman later. Janus watches the documentary. Virgil watches Janus.

“Snakes, unlike humans and most other mammals, are cold-blooded. This means they have an inability to regulate their own body temperature. They must bathe in the sun to stay warm.”

What?

“But basking out here in the open is risky. Predators, like this hawk, can see snakes in the grass, thanks to their incredible eyesight. The snake has to choose. Being safe and cold, or risk getting warm and being lunch.”

What?

The others are focused on the footage on screen or by their own conversations, so Virgil can stare at Janus. Is that…is that why Janus doesn’t like coming to spend time with them? Is that why he doesn’t like coming out of his room? They’re not going to eat him, he’s part of Thomas! They need him like they need each other.

But if Janus is part snake…then it would make sense why he’s nervous about being in the open.

Only later, when Virgil is startled awake by how cold he feels, does he realize that he might’ve been wrong.

Janus isn’t afraid of being around the others, he is afraid of what happens when he isn’t around the others. Because Virgil never feels Janus afraid when he’s with them. He only ever feels it when Janus is alone.

When Janus isn’t in the warmth with them. When he’s safer, maybe, but when he’s cold.

Janus is afraid of the cold.

Well. That’s the easiest one to fix.

Virgil gathers up all the blankets he has and goes to Janus’s door. He dumps the pile on the floor and scampers back to his room, knowing that Janus would’ve heard something hit the ground. He waits, waits, waits, and then—

It’s gone.

The cold on the back of his neck is gone.

Virgil smiles and burrows down under the one sheet on his bed. He pulls his arms tight around his pillow and buries himself under the thin sheet. He curls up as tight as he can and feels that the back of his neck is no longer cold from Janus’s fear.

Janus is warm. That’s all that matters.

Janus doesn’t feel cold again. Janus feels warm. Janus feels warm. Janus feels warm.

Logan has light.

Roman has love.

Patton has friends.

Remus has noise.

Janus has warmth.

They’re okay.

They’re okay.

They’re…okay.

Virgil falls asleep in the cold room.

+1

Virgil doesn’t like touch.

It…it’s not that he’s afraid of it, but it…

Okay. Here’s the thing. Virgil doesn’t like that the others can touch him.

Thomas can’t touch him. Thomas is safe, Virgil keeps him safe, but he doesn’t touch him. Thomas is safe and that is Virgil’s job because he is afraid and Thomas isn’t and it’s fine. There’s a line there. Thomas and Virgil hold the line between each other and it works.

Patton tries to pull him in for hugs and Patton doesn’t like being alone but his hugs make Virgil feel like he’s trapped.

Logan tries to touch him on the shoulder to get his attention and Logan likes being listened to but that hand feels like a live wire.

Roman tries to pull him close when they fight and Roman doesn’t like being rejected but sometimes Virgil doesn’t know whether he wants to fight the monster or Roman’s grip on him.

Remus tries to scare him by grabbing him and Remus likes noise but Virgil can’t stand being grabbed.

Janus tries to poke him because getting people out of their comfort zones is part of his job but Virgil worked hard for his comfort zone and he doesn’t want to get out of it.

Virgil doesn’t like being touched.

But that’s okay. He can…it’s not like the others normally want to touch him.

Virgil likes to sit by himself. There’s less to worry about when he sits by himself. He can sit and he can make his own noise and do his own thing and he can be fine. He can hold a pillow if he needs to and he won’t get overwhelmed. He can just…be.

He likes the idea of just being.

He doesn’t get to do it often.

So he’s surprised when he opens his door one morning and there’s a box sitting in front of his door.

He takes it back inside and opens it up. His mouth falls open.

There, on top, is the last post-it he stuck on Roman’s door. The one that just said ‘you’re important.’ He picks it up with shaky fingers and turns it over.

Virgil, these are for you. We know what you’ve been doing to help and we want to help you too. We know that you do not like being touched so we got you something that can help. You are important too.

Under the message that makes Virgil blink back tears for a second, he sees the names of the others scrawled in their colors. He puts the post-it note in the most important part of his desk and peers back into the box.

He lifts out a spaceship nightlight. It’s the one from the movie he and Logan had spotted on the way back from school. It’s very shiny and smooth to the touch.

There’s a notebook in the box that has the quote from Winnie the Pooh: ‘Always remember you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.’ A purple pen is tucked into the binding.

A spider plushie! It’s soft, it’s fuzzy, it fits right into the palm of his hand. It looks like it’s been made out of the Halloween sweater they got given for Christmas. It was a weird year.

There’s a small tin of putty. It’s purple and black, sparkly, and it makes really cool sounds as Virgil stretches and squeezes it. If he traps an air bubble in it, it makes a satisfying pop sound.

Virgil’s eyes widen as he pulls out a weighted blanket. Oh, it’s warm. It’s so warm. It feels perfect. He can understand why Janus hisses when he’s tired now, he wants to do it himself and he’s not even a snake.

There’s one more thing in the box. It’s dark, soft, and for a moment he thinks it could be another blanket. But as he pulls it out, his mouth drops open.

It’s a hoodie. A simple, plain, black hoodie, that’s soft and looks warm and looks big enough to cover all of his upper body.

They…they know he doesn’t like being touched so…so they gave him a shield.

Oh.

Oh.

Virgil doesn’t take the hoodie off until he switches it for a purple one many years later.

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[robininthelabyrinth]

NMJ is the only one that knows bc he’s the only one that NHS truly trusts, he’s the only one who knows why NHS focuses so much in painting and art, NHS doesn’t know why or how but with a little bit of spiritual energy he’s able to bring what he paints in paper to the real world and with that the Nie sect has the beasts of legends under their command

on ao3

“How about you draw a flower?” Nie Mingjue said without much conviction. It was hard to have conviction when you knew it was pointless.

“No!” Nie Huaisang shouted, unsurprisingly, because toddlers always shouted. They seemed to have a great deal of feelings and sound for such small frames. “Taotie!”

Nie Mingjue grimaced. “No, no, not Taotie,” he said quickly. Never Taotie, not again. “How about the Baihu? Nice fuzzy tiger?”

“No!”

“Fenghuang? You like birds.”

Nie Huaisang considered it. “I like birds,” he agreed.

Nie Mingjue heaved a sigh of relief. “Me, too,” he said enthusiastically. “I love birds.”

He had never had especially strong feelings about birds, but he was willing to develop some.

“Okay,” Nie Huaisang said, and patted his thigh comfortingly. “I’ll draw you a bird, da-ge.”

“…thanks,” Nie Mingjue said.

When Nie Huaisang was done, he proudly presented Nie Mingjue with the results of his work.

Nie Mingjue put the baby phoenix in the new aviary he’d secretly had constructed behind his father’s back, thinking to himself that the high-grade construction materials he’d insisted on were totally worth losing his allowance for the next year.

The phoenix chick - it looked like a plucked chicken with maybe three feathers total - weakly coughed smoke.

Because of course it did.

Sometimes Nie Mingjue wished that he could just tell someone about Nie Huaisang’s unusual gift – it was a pretty big burden to bear, and he really wasn’t sure he was old enough for this type of responsibility – but no one else deserved to know. If they didn’t have the good taste to like Nie Huaisang when he was no one and nobody, pointless and useless, they didn’t deserve the benefits of knowing him now that he could do stuff.

Even if it was weird stuff. 

Stuff like his ability to summoning the things he drew into existence. 

Even things that might not really exist.

Besides, the thought of Nie Huaisang getting wrapped up into war and politics when he was still so young –

No, better to just store away what he made and hope he grew out of it.

And no more Taoties.

-

“Lan Zhan said his uncle shows people his artwork,” Nie Huaisang said, sitting on Nie Mingjue’s table in the family study. “Why don’t you ever show my artwork?”

“You do art?” their father asked absently, most of his attention on the report he was reading.

“Huaisang does great calligraphy,” Nie Mingjue interjected very quickly. “You’ve seen it – it’s beautiful. And his poems are very well crafted, too.”

“But Lan Zhan said –”

Nie Mingjue mentally resigned himself to not being friends with Lan Xichen any longer, no matter how well they’d gotten along, on the basis that the other boy would probably take it personally when Nie Mingjue murdered his brother.

“He also said stuff about rules,” he said. “Hundreds and hundreds of rules. Do you want to listen to all of those, too?”

“No,” Nie Huaisang said sulkily, five years old and bitter with it. “But…”

“How about we show Lan Wangji your aviary?” Nie Mingjue coaxed. “Go ask him if he’d like to see it. I bet he’s never seen anything like that – and you can ask him what type of animal he likes best, too!”

Nie Huaisang’s eyes went wide at the thought and he dashed off.

“You spoil him far too much,” their father commented. “An aviary – you talk about it more than he does, and you’re always getting birds to fill it up for him, too. Why are you so devoted to him learning to like birds?”

“Better than him liking fierce beasts,” Nie Mingjue said, omitting to mention exactly where he obtained the birds that filled the aviary. “Or corpses.”

“If he liked fierce beasts, perhaps he’d be more martially inclined.”

No, we would be, Nie Mingjue thought. He’d gotten a lot of spare practice with Baxia trying to fight corpses that had no business being there during the period in which Nie Huaisang had gotten temporarily interested in the things in his father’s stories – and that was before Nie Huaisang had learned about yao.

“I don’t want him growing up morbid, that’s all,” he said.

“You’re his brother, not his nursemaid,” their father said, a little exasperated. “Nor are you his mother. Why are you fussing over him so?”

Nie Mingjue huffed and shook his head. “How goes recruitment for the border?” he asked instead, and listened to his father tell him about how people barely a year or two older than him were being sent to risk death in the name of sect honor.

Not Nie Huaisang, he promised himself. Not yet.

He’d tell his father when Nie Huaisang was old enough to handle the consequences.

-

“Huaisang, didi,” Nie Mingjue said, and tried to smile, even though it pained him. “Can you do me a favor? A really, really big favor?”

Nie Huaisang sniffed, clutching at his arms and shaking. “What, da-ge?”

“You remember Jiwei? A-die’s saber? Can you draw that for me, please?”

It only made it worse.

-

“Da-ge?”

“Yes, Huaisang?” Nie Mingjue asked, scowling at the map. It didn’t get any better the longer he looked at it, but maybe if he kept glaring he could cow it into submission.

“Don’t you want me to help?”

Nie Mingjue looked up at where Nie Huaisang was wringing his hands by the door. “Help? With what?”

Nie Huaisang rolled his eyes at him, like it was Nie Mingjue being dense instead of him having started a conversation in the middle. “Uh, with border defense?”

“Why would I ask you to help with that?” Nie Mingjue asked blankly, then realized how his words could be misconstrued. “Not that I wouldn’t ask you to help, of course, but you’ve never really liked battlefield strategy, and anyway you are only twelve –”

“Da-ge!” Nie Huaisang whined. “I meant drawing!”

“…as in maps?”

Nie Huaisang’s glare could light fires.

Nie Mingjue coughed and put aside his work to focus on his brother. “Huaisang, why do you think I would use your drawings in planning out a possible battle?”

“Because they’re useful?” Nie Huaisang said, crossing his arms. “I can make things appear, da-ge, just by drawing them. Not sure if you’ve noticed, but that’s not something that normal people can do.”

“I know,” Nie Mingjue said. “It’s not. But just because it’s not normal doesn’t mean it’s not a wonderful ability, Huaisang.”

Nie Huaisang looked a little bit appeased.

“But just because it’s wonderful doesn’t mean I’m going to abuse your ability,” Nie Mingjue continued. “You should be playing, not working, and if anyone tells you otherwise, you tell me and I’ll straighten them out.”

Nie Huaisang came up and hugged him. “So it’s not that you’re not ashamed of me being weird and useless?”

“I think we’ve already established that an ability like yours is far from useless. And I don’t care how weird you are, principles are principles: you’re too young to be used for battle. Sorry, Huaisang; my hands are tied.”

Nie Huaisang laughed at him and left, looking much happier.

-

“So what would you like?” Nie Huaisang asked, eyes sparkling. “Me and my brush are at the ready, here to help!”

Nie Mingjue rubbed his forehead. “If you’re sure…”

“Da-ge! I’m seventeen – you were already sect leader for two years by my age. And it’s not like I’m going out there on the front lines or anything; I’m just going to draw some stuff for you.”

“You say ‘just’,” he grumbled. “It does drain your qi, you know. That’s why you took such a long time to form a golden core…”

“Yes, but I did get there eventually, didn’t I? And anyway, it’s fine, I’ll do it instead of my usual landscapes. What would you like? A dragon to devour our enemies? The white tiger, nipping at their heels? A taotie –”

“No Taotie.”

“You’re so weird about that,” Nie Huaisang complained, rolling his eyes again. “Fine. Then what?”

“Sabers,” Nie Mingjue said, giving in. “Standard steel, not spiritual. Horses, feed, saddles. Say, how are you at drawing arrows?”

“Da-ge,” Nie Huaisang said. “I can draw you the beasts of legend, and you want me to draw you arrows?”

“Yes. As many as you can bring yourself to create, really; everyone’s always short on arrows. More rice would be good, too –”

“This wasn’t exactly what I was expecting when I volunteered to help,” Nie Huaisang grumbled.

“Are you going to do it for me or not?” Nie Mingjue asked, unimpressed. “You asked me to use you, not to give you an art project.”

His brother heaved a sigh. “Yes, yes, I will. Can you explain to me why this is your choice, at least?”

Nie Mingjue ruffled his brother’s hair. “Huaisang, when you draw something, it comes to life. Fully to life, as a separate and independent creature of its own – if you draw a dragon, who’s to say that the dragon will choose to fight the Wen sect, instead of turning on us? It wouldn’t be much help if we had to run out, sabers drawn, to deal with whatever it was, only to be exhausted before the Wen sect even arrived.”

“…oh.”

“When we’ve made some progress in the field, I promise to let you help build fortifications,” Nie Mingjue said. “You can start thinking of really nasty traps –”

“Da-ge?”

“Yes?”

“…is that why you hate the idea of me drawing Taotie so much?”

Nie Mingjue coughed.

“Da-ge!”

“Don’t worry about it. It was always really good saber practice…”

-

“And if anyone tries anything against you at the camp, you draw something really mean, okay?” Nie Mingjue said, pressing paper and a brush into his brother’s hand in addition to the ones he’d hidden away in his luggage - there was a chance that might be confiscated upon his arrival. “I don’t care what it is.”

“I know, I know –”

“Promise me!”

“I will!” Nie Huaisang exclaimed. “I promise already!”

“Not just if they’re aggressive. Even if things just look suspicious –”

“Suspicious? Like what?”

“If they take you somewhere secluded,” Nie Mingjue said, face drawn with worry. “Somewhere where it’d take us a long time to find your bodies. I don’t care if you put other people in danger from your creation, okay? Don’t make me have to find your corpse.”

Nie Huaisang was silent for a moment. “I understand,” he finally said. “I promise.”

-

“I’m never drawing anything legendary ever again,” Nie Huaisang sniffed into Nie Mingjue’s collar. “That Xuanwu was awful. It tried to eat all of us!”

-

“Do you want me to help with the logistics, Sect Leader Nie?” Meng Yao asked.

“You already help with the logistics,” Nie Mingjue said, not really paying attention. If it was serious, Meng Yao would bring it to his attention – he was a truly remarkable aide-de-camp. “You already help with everything.”

“I appreciate Sect Leader Nie’s confidence in me,” Meng Yao said, smiling a little. “But no, I meant – with the imports.”

“Imports?”

“Every week we receive new shipments of goods – food, weapons, defenses – from Qinghe, and we don’t send any money back. Surely such expenditures are putting a strain on the Nie treasury..?”

“Oh, don’t worry about that,” Nie Mingjue said. “Huaisang is handling it. It’s good for him to have responsibility.”

Meng Yao looked a little skeptical, but in his defense, he’d met Nie Huaisang.

“Really,” Nie Mingjue assured him. “He’s not going to hurt our budget – it’ll be fine. They’ve come steadily every week so far, haven’t they?”

“If Sect Leader Nie is content, then so am I,” Meng Yao said, but he was pouting a little, perhaps at the perceived lack of trust. He did so love to be helpful.

“You know I trust you with my life,” Nie Mingjue told him. “But this is something that Huaisang is, for once, best placed to handle. Don’t worry about it.”

It wasn’t really his secret to share, after all. Maybe when the war was done.

-

Nie Mingjue was on his back in the throne room of the Fire Palace, staring up at the man who murdered his father and who was about to murder him, too, when he heard the sound.

A high-pitched squeal, unlike anything else he’d ever heard – a little like a pig, a little like a wolf, a little like the long slow grate of metal against metal. It burned on the ear, a vile sound on the verge of being physically painful.

“What is that?” Wen Ruohan asked, frowning. He was standing above Nie Mingjue, his foot crushing down on his chest; Baxia was out of reach, knocked away, but at least no longer in the traitor Meng Yao’s hands. “Meng Yao…?”

“I - I’m not sure, Sect Leader Wen,” Meng Yao said, looking equally confused.

Nie Mingjue laughed.

They both looked at him.

He grinned up at them, blood in his teeth.

“What?” he said. “Never heard a Taotie before?”