#bc luke has internalized homophobia

[ralvezfanatic]

Once More To See You is so secret ralvez coded btw

[rayhalloffame]

hey hi hello i have returned and im now making it everyone’s problem

it’s longer than i first expected but like

i mirror these characters with people from my hometown so

*

ray hall and saying slurs when he’s young bc he doesn’t entirely understand them but his dad said them a lot and he picked up the habit.

ray hall (bi king he is) having so much self hatred due to internalized homophobia that usually manifests in outwardly lashing out at anyone even slightly insinuating he’s queer

ray hall and The Mullet Phase/neg

heather nill and staying quiet when she knows she should speak up and speak out against the injustices around her because in her house that was backtalking and never ended well.

dodge mason and being an outcast the entire year because he was new in a school where everyone knows everyone

dodge mason and sitting alone in a corner of the commons area for lunch because there aren’t enough lunch tables for all the kids and he has no one to sit with

tyler young and saying things that definitely Aren’t Okay but they don’t know any better because they’re kids and havent seen anything but the way everything’s always been.

bishop moore and almost alwaysbeing smarter than everyone, but not having the ability to know when it’s okay to share what he knows and when it isn’t.

natalie williams and not being able to go through her rebellious phase because of her dad keeping a close watch. that manifesting as an even bigger blowout rebellion later down the road that strains their relationship for a long while.

sheriff cortez and feeling like he has to prove something to stay sheriff, he has to earn it. so he starts being stricter on the laws. then his son is gone, and he falls into an endless well of gambling, and it ruins him.

daniel diggins and being able to read people like books. being burdened with how everyone feels, not because they told him, but because he can see it in their faces. he can look at you and just know.

troy van and playing panic to try and escape bullying and name calling and threats and beatings because of how they choose to express themself.

shawna kenny and spreading rumors, not out of maliciousness, but because theres nothing better to do. she thinks no harm comes from them, because she can just roll rumors off her back, why can’t everyone else do that?

anne mccarthy and being called crazy and kooky and weird because no one understands how she lives. no one understands what she does or who she is. and in a town like that, that’s perceived as a bad thing.

dayna mason and being babied by the whole town. dayna and hearing ‘bless her heart’s and ‘we pray for you every day’ when all she wants is to be treated like a person.

luke hall and raising his brother the way he was raised. with fights and booze and driving boats. luke hall and doing his best to shoulder a reaponsibility that should’ve never been his.

heather nill and raising her sister the exact opposite how she was raised. heather wanting the best for lilly. heather wanting her to never know fear in whatever place they’re living. fear is for outside. fear is for the real world.

*

this is everything i have off the top of my head

not all of them are negative!! yippee!!

Omg the Luke and Heather parallel I’m so sick to my stomach!! Trying to do their best as older siblings :’((

Also diggins has my heart truly

[aguecheek]

(edit 5/6/23 oh my god people are seeing this now??? i made this post in october of 2021 please don’t take this as a legitimate critique of the new book 😭😭)

what so nico can take his boyfriend to fucking tartarus to get some loser titan back but he can’t pull some underworld strings w his dad and revive jason 🤨🤨 just realized i have way more to say than i thought i did so lmao incredibly neurodivergent rant under the cut that also contains spoilers for like. every book rick riordans ever written probably. don’t reblog this it’s not thorough analysis or genuine complaints it’s just me having feelings and also autism

jason was and is my favorite character in the greco-roman series (and like my third favorite character in the riordanverse, only behind carter and alex) so i’m still very fucking bitter about the burning maze. jason was SO important to nico lmao like? nico fought SO hard to get bianca back???? only reason he didn’t pull it off is bc she chose rebirth. like okay i know nicos whole thing in blood of olympus was accepting that death is the natural conclusion to life and that it’s inescapable and irreversible. and sometimes it’s inevitable and it’s irresponsible to get in the way of that (tho he totally coulda saved octavian and it wouldn’t have changed anything but what the fuck ever lmao) but it’s not like rick hasn’t ever completely abandoned his character’s development before!!! besides. nico brought hazel back from the dead and then she was just?? allowed to stay??? i’m not complaining i adore hazel but like dude 😭 and leo died and brought himself back to life and he’s not even a son of hades so how the fuck did HE get away with it. so what rick can just bend his in-universe life and death rules for everyone EXCEPT my favorite little blond bitch of the absolute myriad of little blond bitches? EXCEPT my sweet responsible repressed roman wolf-dude? EXCEPT one of the only truly morally sound characters in the whole series? EXCEPT my favorite internalized-homophobia-having motherfucker? EXCEPT one of the only characters in the Seven who still had significant fucking meat left on their character arc? what? me? bitter?? you’re asking if I’M bitter?????yes a little tiny bit🥰 like okay i KNOW rick has killed other characters but like luke had to die for the story. zoe and bianca didn’t have to die but i get why they did. octavian didn’t have to die but i get why he did. silenas, beckendorfs, and ethan’s deaths hurt but they makes sense. like war is hell idk what to tell u. those are the only like MAIN CHARACTERS he killed off, and most of them are Not main characters, they just got semi-decent screentime. Jason is absolutely a main character and i’d argue he’s the only main character ricks killed off besides luke (and like. magnus. but that doesn’t count) his death literally did not need to happen and it comes out of fucking nowhere tonally, like all of his POV characters have had plot armor since the beginning, and that applies to kane chronicles and magnus chase too. “oh but the prophecy! he had to die! he did it to save piper!” RICK WROTE THE PROPHECY. and yes of course i appreciate that his death was in character bc he’s a self sacrificing idiot and a genuine hero and obviously he’d give his life for his ex girlfriend bc he cares abt her and Yeah he helped apollo’s character development but MAN like. there are other ways to give him that development???

oh wait. oh shit this was. originally a rant abt the new book LMAO 😭😭😭 i’m sorry i just clearly have a lot of feelings about jason grace. so okay back on track. i do appreciate rick partnering with an ownvoices author for this one so he can give us respectful portrayals of queer characters bc god knows this motherfucker has given us nothing but jacked up representation since day one. and i am really hopeful that it won’t be a bury your gays trope because like. ownvoices author and also in terms of representation. rick does. try. he does try. he doesn’t achieve, he doesn’t do a good job, but he keeps trying, and he’s aware of people’s criticisms, so it might be okay. but then again. rick fucking hates both blond people and children of apollo and he kills them off at any opportunity that arises. so we’ll just have to wait and see. okay but am i crazy bc? nobody cares about bob that much? not enough to want an entire book abt getting him back. like his story was sad for sure. but he served his purpose in the larger narrative. what is gained for the world by going to fetch him? what does it add to nico or will’s character? in what way does it enrich the universe?? people got emotional abt him staying behind and for sure i did too but like. it’s not worth a whole standalone is it???? like goddamn rick! what abt a hunters of artemis standalone where you fix the jacked up representation you gave them? where you portray them actually respectfully and yknow. humanize your female characters? give us some focus on reyna and thalia (and why reyna even joined the hunters bc dude u can’t just shove every female character left without a love interest into the hunters 😭 it’s a bad look) oh or what about the titan war from the roman side? where’s my jason, reyna, and octavian content? where’s my roman politics? what abt that one that people have been asking for for fucking years? not to mention that the tartarus chapters in house of hades were…kinda boring lmaoooo 😭 there was some cool stuff in there but i really just skimmed them the first time through, the only genuinely attention grabbing thing is the bit with the poison. but i mean i just wasn’t hooked, i didnt care, my expectations were not met—so im not excited to head back to tartarus. but like beyond that it’s just so ooc for nico to want to go back? like tartarus fucking shattered him and having a bf with built in light up sketchers isn’t gonna make it. not unbelievably horrific. i know nico liked bob but did he like him THAT FUCKING MUCH?

look. am i a little biased ? bc nico is one of my least favorite characters in the series? yes i am ❤️ do i care ? no!! <3 it’s my blog and i’ll be as pissy and biased as i want to be!!!! god. considering i pretty rarely hyperfixate on two things at once and i’m currently hyperfixated on deltarune. snd also i’ve been ‘hyperfixated’ on percy jackson for like a year now and my interest in it didn’t ever really die out since i read the books in elementary school. i’m starting to consider that it might be edging into special interest territory. which would SUUUCK😭’m not even hyperfixated on pjo and i just wrote this shit out completely stream of consciousness in like half an hour on my phone which i really can’t do w subjects i’m not hyperfixated on unless that subject is shakespeare aka my special interest so like. shit man i guess we’ll just have to see how that plays out.

anyway lol i’ve talked too long. my thesis statement is that nobody cares abt bob THAT much, not even nico, and if ricks gonna do anything involving nico snd the underworld then jason should be centered bc he had so much unfinished work and had arguably the most mileage left in his character arc out of all of the POV characters in HOO (besides Reyna) and he was an incredibly important figure in nicos life in HOH and BOO and honestly arguably even pre-series.

[ssa-lesbian]

would love to hear your bau sexuality/gender hcs!!! hell yeah

AAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! i made a post way back when i hadn’t even made this sideblog yet about my hcs for the team BUT i’ve been thinking some thoughts so here are the new ones!!

okay. i’ve already said this. but. trans lesbian emily prentiss. this is my favorite fucking thing ever, no i do not accept constructive criticism.

ummmm OH bisexual trans man hotch and bisexual trans woman haley!!! i love them so much

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA pan trans woman penelope !! i read a fic with it and it literally makes everything go AAAAAAAA

jj is a bisexual nonbinary woman, she’s always been unsure of her sexuality (not sure how to define her attraction to women vs not sure if she actually was attracted to men) and it wasn’t until recently that she finally came to terms with her bisexuality after lots of support + research from the team. she’s also never quite felt comfortable with herself-- she just figured it was from first being stuck in the place of her trauma for multiple years and then working in an environment surrounded by horror for most her life, but even as she gets older she still doesn’t understand her uneasiness at being addressed as ma’am, mrs, etc. she spends some time with reid and discovers the word nonbinary and is like oh! oh. now that she’s more aware of her gender identity, she doesn’t mind being referred to with feminine addressment/characteristics although it’s not her exact preference.

tara uses queer! her gender’s a bit all over the place, and she sometimes might use graysexual when describing her attraction (or lack thereof), but most of the time she sticks to queer.

spencer is bisexual and nonbinary, which is a super common hc i’ve seen in the fandom :D i’m glad we all agree on that hehe his relationship with gender is p relaxed, has mostly androgyne aspects

morgan is bisexual and cis man, a lot of internalized homophobia/biphobia he manages to ultimately overcome

ummmmmmmmmmm OH luke is bi ace trans man! i love him So Much

elle is aro bi (preference for women) and cis female! was talking about this with @ellegreenawy -- at first she’s afraid her lack of romantic attraction is bc she’s been playing into this “bad bitch” persona for so long it fucked up her attraction n shit but it’s nothing like that that’s just who she is and we love her

blake is a bi trans woman because i said so

matt is bi and cis male! kristy is a straight trans woman <3

okay fuck it’s late and i’m tired and i know i’m missing some ppl but these are all the vibes i have rn,, jj’s is way too fucking long but also i feel like it’s def an odd hc so must explain ohohoho

[juliecurve]

Here she is, Regina (Reggie) *insert last name*.

Also I’m using some head cannons from other people on tumblr, but I don’t remember who came up with them so if you know pls tell me so i can credit them. The two head cannons are Reggie’s from the south and that Reggies parents are rich.

Ignore the penguins on my mirror, it’s Christmas year-round at my house

She’s wearing black jeans, a sunset curve shirt and the “famed” heels. Someone told her that girls couldn’t play rock music because they wear heels so now she wears them all the time to spite them. Thats one of the reasons she likes being a ghost, she can wear heels all the time and her feet never get sore. 

Note: Reggie may not be great at social cues but she still can think things through. She’s never going to wear the sunset curve shirt while she’s visible/playing, just incase someone likes (or recognizes) the design and looks them up. In the words of Spencer Shea, “I may be an idiot, but I’m not stupid,” and I she lives by that.

I got more detailed as I changed so get ready for some backstory.

So with the theory that Reggie is from the south, I expanded on it a little bit and she’s from the mountains in the south. Like northern Arizona, rockies area, and she basically lived on a ranch. Because of this she always wears a necklace with the mountains on it, and it was given to her by her old best friend, who she left behind when she moved and unfortunately lost contact with.

She also has a bracelet on her wrist, fastened by a safety pin, it was made by Alex and Luke right around when they first became friends. They made it after she told them about her parents fighting. Luke picked out the colors but Alex made it bc Luke couldn’t make bracelets. The clasp broke so she fixed it with a safety pin. She could get it fixed but they she thinks it adds to the vibe and the girls agree. She also keeps it because her parents think its “unbecoming” but they don’t care enough to fight with her about it.

She bought some of her rings herself and some were given to her by various people, mainly her bandmates (Bobbi (Bobby) and Julian (Julie) are both included in that.

Specifically on her right pinkie she has a ring she got from one of those quarter machines the day her and the rest of the girls decided to form Sunset Curve. The one on her right index is from Bobbi and even though she betrayed them, the ring is too cool to take off.

The one on her left index is from Luke after they played a street fair and Alex gave her the ring on her thumb after coming out. Julian gave her the gold ring on her right middle finger after they performed Great (he also gave Alex and Luke little gifts). 

In my head she has one of those little gold necklaces and it says Reggie because her parents refuse to call her Reggie. They gave her a fancy name so she can “succeed” in “high-society” but she feels more like a Reggie.

She’s bi and reacts the same way as cannon reggie does to girls in her head, but has a little internalized bi-/homophobia from her parents, Alex’s parents, and the 90′s in general. In the future when Julian and the Phantoms play at Pride, Julian buys her a bi flag bracelet, Alex a gay one, and Luke a pan one.

ah one more thing almost forgot, she says y’all like all the time. whenever possible. even when it doesn’t make sense. just always, y’all.

Yeah... feel free to add on or ask questions or whatever! I want Regina Molina *insert last name here* to be for all of us!

[prettyboyblog]

a julie and the phantoms take that could definitely turn into a fic at some point

nick is token straight energy but may i raise you

he’s been repressing the fact that he’s bi and that’s why he was with carrie (bc he thought that bc he was attracted to women he couldn’t possibly like men) (and she was with him also bc of internalized homophobia except she knows she’s gay, nick just hasn’t figured it out yet). but when caleb possesses him caleb sees everything going on in his head obviously and sees the internal panic that’s happening and nick suddenly reminds him of himself and he stops possessing him before he does anything to julie and the boys

he then goes to find willie and apologizes for keeping him and alex apart, explaining that he hasn’t gotten over the loss of his husband and he thought that keeping those two apart would make him feel better

he takes willie back to the boys and the guys (luke especially for reasons i’ll explain in a sec) freak out when they see caleb again

he apologizes and assures them that he wants to make right with them and so he frees willies soul from his clutches

caleb offers them to still play at his club, but it would no longer be binding and julie can come too

luke is still incredibly skeptical (they all are but him especially) and he mulls it over with the others

julie knows the pain that caleb caused them but she also saw the pain in calebs eyes and she pushes that they should give him a chance

(also luke is especially frightened and skeptical of him due to the suit caleb make him wear. there have been a lot of theories that luke has sensory issues and that’s why he never wears sleeves. so when caleb did that he was on the verge of panicking the entire time. and as soon as they got out of thgc he was crying and shaking a lot and alex and reggie quickly ripped off his sleeves and loosened his collar. then alex and reggie joined, and luke kept glitching because he was still calming down)

[justastraightupmess]

good thing abt them being childhood friends tho. the whole “friends help each other jerk off :///” thing could have happened earlier so luke would much more quickly accept he likes guys/likes ev bc has been doing that shit with a guy during his younger years where he was still developing that good old internalized homophobia 

[wellward-a]

r*berto has a lot of internalized homophobia and it shows on the works he creates

oh hell ya... like how when u sell ur soul to satan it apparently makes you both poly and bi and 100% down for orgies whenev, because poly and bi people are so depraved and evil u know... or how witches/warlocks, even those in committed relationships like luke and ambrose, are evidently incapable of romantic love and are just sexual animals, like mlm haven’t literally died bc of that stereotype... not to mention the whole “a sodomite an abomination” line which we haven’t even touched

[purplepalmdelight]

Chapters: 5/? Fandom: Stranger Things (TV 2016) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Jonathan Byers/Steve Harrington/Nancy Wheeler, Jonathan Byers & Joyce Byers & Will Byers, Jonathan Byers & Eleven | Jane Hopper, Nancy Wheeler & Eleven | Jane Hopper, Barbara "Barb" Holland & Nancy Wheeler, Tommy Hagan & Steve Harrington & Carol Perkins, Tommy Hagan/Carol Perkins, Joyce Byers & Karen Wheeler, Karen Wheeler & Nancy Wheeler, Will Byers & Nancy Wheeler, Will Byers & Dustin Henderson & Lucas Sinclair & Mike Wheeler, Barbara "Barb" Holland & Nancy Wheeler & Steve Harrington & Tommy Hagan & Carol Perkins, Tommy Hagan/Carol Perkins/Barbara "Barb" Holland, Joyce Byers & Jim "Chief" Hopper & Karen Wheeler Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Role Reversal, jon goes to the upside down instead of will, ergo.... hell, Polyamory, teenage relationships, Recreational Drug Use, actually they haven't smoked weed yet but im sure i'll write a scene where they do, gotta keep up my brand, Smoking, ft joyces nicotine addiction, god that woman needs therapy, I LOVE HER SO MUCH, anyway, Not Really Character Death, like we all know he's not dead bc we watched the show, presumably as we r all on the archive, but like THEY dont know hes not dead so do i tag it???, How Do I Tag, Do Not Trust The Government They Are Shady as Hell, i should make that a tag, cherry coke, there was no reason to tag that except i made it a motif, look i honestly dont fucking know anymore, fuck the rain man, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Internalized Homophobia, Pining, the inherent tenderness of friendship!!!!!, joyce and karen and hopper deserve better!!!!!, i add them into the tags bc their friendship is IMPORTANT, gratuitous use of the same motifs, Getting to Know Each Other, reconnection, im feeling kinda soft let me be, POV Alternating, i have mentioned the weed!! i knew i'd live up to my brand, Nonbinary Character, but like it's the 80s so in a vague and confusing way, Author Is Sleep Deprived, but he is trying his best Summary:

"Why didn't Jonathan pick him up, then?"

And isn't that question of the day? - Jonathan never took that second shift. It doesn't fix anything. - His car is gone.

-

Chapter 5 is up!!

Chapter Summary: It’s like the tree has been wrenched apart at the seams, spilling red and black and blue blood from the wound. Its edges are pulsing with a phantom heartbeat. It’s a brief moment, maybe seconds, but there’s a hand reaching out of the gaping laceration, and a thin, red-stained hand, and a black t-shirt that’s ripped across the stomach, and-Maybe the world is just a little stranger than she thought. -- or; Luke Sattler places a call to the police station.

[tyrus-time]

YESSSS THANK YOU WICC

this reminds me of something I typed up after the ep aired and I never posted, so I’ll just add them here:

Y’all can make jokes about what a silly name Luke chose for TJ, but TJ having a “ridiculous” name gives even more depth to his character, and it hits me in the feels....

the fact that starting at THREE DAYS OLD, he was already being judged for being “different” or “abnormal”......

imagining learning as a kid, “your real name is Thelonious Jagger, but your grandparents don’t like that name and most people will judge /laugh at you, so we call you something different instead.”

Like, TJ clearly has a Complex about it, illustrated by how closely he guards his full name. It’s not his fault that he was named that, but like with his dyscalculia, he feels ashamed for something that’s out of his control. (Similar to struggling with internalized homophobia, too.)

Poor TJ has got insecurities stacked on insecurities. And he tries to maintain semblance of control by guarding himself, keeping things secret, building walls around himself.

But he didn’t WANT to build up those walls. He wanted to be a kind, loving, open person.... and Cyrus has always been the person to draw that goodness out of him.

And he caves about his name because he really does want to be totally honest with Cyrus, despite being afraid.

Cy pulls his cute “I’m gonna DIE of curiosity” thing, but if TJ really put his foot down and said “I’m sorry but I am NOT comfortable sharing my name,” I bet Cyrus would respect that and back off.

But TJ gives in to Cyrus, not bc Cyrus pressures him, but because he knows he can trust Cyrus. It’s still really difficult for him to speak freely and be so vulnerable, but he does so for Cyrus. He has done so over and over before, and he will again and again.

No I will never be over that bench scene. Listen, learning T.J.’s name while played off as amusing; was also something T.J. was extremely embarrassed about. He was terrified of being ridiculed for his own name and kept it a secret. We already know T.J.’s fear of being judged from his dyscalculia plot-line. He already opened up and trusted Cyrus with one of his insecurities, so even though he’s extremely wary of sharing his full name; what better person to tell than Cyrus? What does Cyrus do when he finds out? Not only does he hit him with the usual support; he makes T.J. feel good about his name and thinks it’s unique and cool. Something T.J. was absolutely not expecting, considering that his own grandparents refuse to use his full name because they think it’s “ridiculous”. This is why the lead up to the next line hits so hard. The moment T.J. says “Is there anything else you wanna know”. He’s all in. He’s absolutely trusting Cyrus 100% here, ready to tell him anything because after the interaction they just had, in that moment, he knows Cyrus wouldn’t let anything ruin their bond; even if his crush was unrequited… I just-