#bc it's a key memory / moment in their early relationship

[elvenbeard]

-- No Regrets --

[pray4saint]

bad idea! — girl in red | reader wakes up in [cc]'s bed, again, and doesn't understand why they keep coming back here, why they keep getting high or drunk and call [cc]

like real people do — hozier | one kiss reader has shared publicly with [cc] and five kisses they've shared alone

let's fall in love for the night — finneas | reader goes on a late night drive with [cc], who also happens to be their best friend, and their first kiss, but they don't know that [cc] is in love with them 'don't waste your eyes on jealous guys fuck that noise' 'i know better than to call you mine'

watch you sleep. — girl in red | [cc] wakes up early and stays in bed, thinking about and admiring reader, who's sleeping right next to them bc they could stay there forever, at least until reader wakes up

like a tattoo — sade | reader and [cc] are in a situationship and [cc] wants to open up to reader, but their past feels so dark to themselves

gorgeous — taylor swift | reader joins in on a youtube project where they meet [cc], and he's just so goddamn gorgeous but still somehow ends up with his number, still, reader can't help but stare at him every time they see him

escapism. — raye, 070 shake | reader meets [cc] at a bar, post-breakup with the intent of a rebound, but ends up with a one night therapist, who turns into a friend, and eventually their next love

wish you were sober — conan gray | reader, in love with [cc], picks him up from yet another drunk bout and again, [cc] flirts and says all these words that reader is sure he doesn't mean, especially the kiss he gives them 'real sweet but i wish you were sober'

crush culture — conan gray | reader's sworn off dating for a 6 months after a bad breakup, but then there's [cc] and reader just refuses to admit that maybe, just maybe, they have a big fat huge crush on him bc they want so badly to get through the 6 months, although [cc] flirting doesn't help at all 'oh no, don't look in their eyes, 'cause that's how they get you, kiss you then forget you'

only love can hurt like this — paloma faith | reader and [cc] are on a break after a horrible fight, and both expect it to end afterwards, but neither reader nor [cc] expected to be in so much pain without the other, missing them in bed and looking for them everywhere they go, and realising they need each other bc what they have is real, and it's a forever kind of love

sparks — coldplay | reader misses their long-distance boyfriend [cc] horribly, even when they call every day and text as often as possible

everybody talks — neon trees | [cc] has been getting teased by his friends for being so head over heels for reader and not confessing, so he decides to just do it, asking reader if they can talk for a moment outside during a group hangout and kisses them, not realising that everyone is watching from inside, whispering and giggling bc it took them long enough 'and then she made my lips hurt'

jessie's girl — rick springfield | [cc1] and reader are in a happy, long-term relationship, and they've talked about having a shared crush on [cc2] but never doing anything about it, meanwhile [cc2] is pining away after both reader and [cc1], at least until one night when [cc1] & reader invite [cc2] to come snuggle with them during a movie 'she's watchin' him with those eyes'

my boo — usher, alicia keys | reader and [cc1] are ex-high school sweethearts who stayed friends, and have barely dated anyone else bc they know that the other is the only one for them, then, at a high school reunion, they're voted best couple and end up kissing to appease the crowd, + [cc2] who went to high school with them and recorded that whole section, including the kiss

all mine — brent faiyez | five times [cc] made sure reader and others knew who they belonged to and one time reader made sure [cc] and others knew who he belonged to

photograph — ed sheeran | a few nights before the wedding, reader and [cc] go through their polaroids and digital pictures together, reflecting on the memories on they have and thinking about all the memories they'll keep making after they tie the knot + reader and [cc] pick polaroids to keep in their wallets 'we keep this love in a photograph'

devil doesn't bargain — alec benjamin | reader feels pressured by their family to attend a family event but they know that they'll be ganged up on for their choices in life and [cc] helps them through it, promising reader that together, they'll have a different family dynamic 'he'll only break your heart again' 'he isn't gonna change'

pretend lovers — montell fish | reader and [cc] are best friends, and basically dating, but [cc] is slowly falling in love

somewhere only we know — keane | reader runs off during a big argument with a friend and only [cc] knows where to find them

style — taylor swift | reader and [cc] are together, and so loved by the world that they notice that they're labelled 'style coded' by a lot of their fanbase

never really over — katy perry | reader keeps asking [cc] to come over and it always ends in them sleeping together, and feelings that neither reader or [cc] are prepared for

boyfriend — dove cameron | after reader's [bf] asks for an open relationship and reader accepts due to pressure, and then complains to [cc] about how they feel bad for the next person [bf] tries to make cum bc [bf] fails to do it for them and [cc] offers to help out

my type — saweetie | [cc] overhears reader talking about how he's exactly their type to their friends at a party, and [cc] confronts them about it [might end in smut]

runaway baby — bruno mars + lost my mind — finneas | reader hears of [cc], an absolute fuckboy a man, and doesn't care, so when he tells reader to find someone good for them and they tell him no, he assumes it's gonna be a repeat of every other person, but reader doesn't fall for the charm, doesn't get hooked, and instead falls for the man behind the facade, and gets him hooked in the process

someone new — hozier + dress — taylor swift | reader meets [cc1] and immediately starts falling, but then is introduced to [cc2] and starts falling for him too, reader isn't easy, but by god it's hard to ignore one or the other, especially when it seems almost like they know reader liked them both

[kaibacorpintern]

one thing i've been thinking about lately is the end of DSOD from atem's perspective - quite a lot of ink has been spilled about what this moment means for Kaiba, but from atem's POV the thrust of their relationship over the series goes like this...

kaiba is my enemy and i want to punish him (early manga/death-T)

i believe in the strength of kaiba's spirit and he's an honorable opponent/true duelist (DK)

kaiba is kind of annoying and weird but he always believes i can surpass myself and he hates to see me fail (early BC)

kaiba is a key piece of the puzzle of my true identity (later BC)

kaiba is my rival and my ally and my friend ("a friend... a rival... where is the line?") and i wish him the best on his journey to the future (end of BC)

... a trajectory that is constructed out of very few moments together, comparatively speaking - as readers, we see pretty much every single moment they interact from start to finish. there are almost no unseen, "offscreen" moments between atem and kaiba, with perhaps the lone exception of wandering around battle city together looking for jounouchi, while there is clearly a lot of time spent together "offscreen" for atem & yuugi, atem & jounouchi, atem & anzu, etc.

kaiba IS open about how atem makes him feel - "i tremble with desire / dueling you makes my heart beat faster" - but he's not great at communicating anything and he's really stubborn about accepting (or simply unable to accept) the idea that their sometimes combative, sometimes supportive relationship could mean more than just rivalry and antagonism (or defeating the memory of his stepfather via unwilling understudy.)

in other words, despite the incredibly strong emotions they provoke/inspire in each other every time they meet, they don't really know each other that well - they've never shared a meal or gone to the movies together or spent meaningful time together outside of duels ("duels ARE meaningful time together!!" kaiba yells), and kaiba resists a friendship in the mode of all of atem's other friendships. atem accepts this, but still wants kaiba to admit they're friends.

the manga implies kaiba knew about the Ceremonial Duel, if only based on that one panel where he's standing outside in the sand with Mokuba - perhaps he showed up too late, or was too nervous/scared to go in (credit @rainstormcolors for this incredible idea.) regardless, from atem's POV: kaiba did not show up for this, the final good-bye... maybe this friendship wasn't that important to him, after all?

this is what's informing my current thoughts on Atem at the end of DSOD: you are dead. you have some knowledge of what's going on in the world of the living. probably, because you are dead, you have no expectations for visitors or guests or, perhaps, ever seeing certain people again, due to the finality of death and the nebulous rules around who is allowed into the ancient egyptian afterlife (20th-21st century Japanese teenagers, question mark?)

and then your most stubborn and unhinged friend, who really only just accepted that you're friends and you don't know him all that well outside of the fun and blistering melodramatics of your favorite card game, storms through the door tracking sand because he wants to play your favorite card game with you, he crossed dimensions because your relationship is that important to him, this guy who constantly blurted out weird dramatic things but otherwise kept you at arm's length this whole time, and a dozen things that weren't clear before suddenly become clear to you, and a dozen things that seemed immutable and unchangeable are suddenly uncertain and unstable. and you realize he was listening to you the whole time, and you greet him with a smile.

[acealistair]

Cosette dynamics with the rest of the BG3 party members, under the cut bc it got long of course heheh

For those that read this I'd also love to hear about other people's Tavs and their dynamics!

Astarion:

FORBIDDEN MAGIC BUDDIES LET'S GO! (they enable each other horribly lol)

But in all seriousness Cosette honestly probably confuses Astarion quite a lot, I imagine he hasn't dealt with her brand of "purity" for a long time.

She keeps accidentally flirting with him, from her perspective in the effort to be kind and friendly towards him, but obviously that's not totally clear to Astarion.

I headcanon that at the party when he's talking about wanting to have "fun" and Cosette straight-up doesn't get it he's hit with a realization akin to "holy shit I can't do this." So nothing romantic is gonna happen between them, unless he makes some move I'm not expecting.

That being said, her kindness, particularly in taking the news he's a vampire spawn in stride (and letting him drink her blood of course), has earned her a soft spot in his heart, as loathe as he would be to admit it.

Cosette thinks Astarion is funny and exciting (in both his personality and circumstances) but also feels bad for him since he's clearly shown he's traumatized by his years as a spawn. However she's also fascinated by the logistics of vampires, of course.

Gale:

Oh you know they're on the exact same wavelength (weavelength?) when it comes to love of magic and knowledge. They hit it off instantly.

I like to think Gale was enamored with Cosette pretty early on, admiring her optimism, kindness, and passion. I imagine he was really surprised to have the first person he met after the nautiloid be just as enthusiastic about magic as he is.

I have a headcanon about him marveling at her when they find the secret lab of the "healer" in the blighted village, like he's never seen a person get so starry-eyed at a dusty, kinda gross basement filled with alchemy implements and he finds it incredibly endearing. I might write about it when I have a better grasp of his personality heheh

For Cosette, she thought of Gale as a friend right away, but her moment of truly falling for him was during the experiencing-the-Weave scene. It was magical in all senses of the word for her and it kinda hit her that "oh, he gets me" which cannot be said for the majority of people.

I do think Gale's currently a little pained with Cosette because he told her his whole story, including sharing his memory of the trauma, and then she turned around and proceeded to open a tome full of forbidden knowledge without care for the consequences oops lol. So I'll at least headcanon that he'll be trying to stop Cosette from falling down that slippery slope in the future.

Karlach:

Karlach's the newest companion for me so I don't know much about her yet (other than I love her) and therefore this'll be shorter, BUT

If it weren't for Gale and Wyll being there I do think a romance could have been possible for her and Cosette, but now not so much unless something surprising happens in-game.

As it stands I'm predicting a more sisterly relationship, with Karlach looking out for Cosette (not that nobody else does but I feel it'll be particularly strong with Karlach).

Cosette is low-key relieved to have someone even close to as cheerful as she is in the party honestly. She's so pleased to be able to have upbeat conversations with Karlach, even if they're not about magic or scholarly topics.

She's fascinated with Karlach's infernal engine though, of course, and is trying to learn all she can about it.

Cosette WILL give Karlach that hug she mentioned wanting if it's the last thing she does ;_;

Lae'zel:*

Really weirdly, Lae'zel likes Cosette quite a bit? Mostly because Cosette is respectful of her culture and allows Lae'zel to speak whenever they interact with other githyanki.

Cosette was a bit scared of Lae'zel at first but tried to keep a positive attitude. She was about to give up on becoming true friends with Lae'zel until she let slip that she's a scholar as much as she is a warrior, and then Cosette got REAL excited because they finally had something to bond over.

Cosette really wants to learn everything she can about githyanki culture so she takes any opportunity to ask Lae'zel about it, which Lae'zel sometimes acts like she thinks is annoying but I think secretly likes it heheh.

Shadowheart:*

I imagine Shadowheart is pretty exasperated with how blatantly naive Cosette tends to be but the fact that she was so chill with her worshipping Shar is incredibly important to her.

I think Shadowheart's kind of in the gang of "I'm gonna roll my eyes at a lot of stuff you do but I will protect you with my fucking life" along with Astarion and Lae'zel lmao

Cosette is taken aback sometimes with how prickly and sassy Shadowheart can get and worries that she doesn't like her much, but then Shadowheart will turn around and say that Cosette is a friend the likes of which she's never had before. So Cosette has come to the conclusion that Shadowheart doesn't mean a lot of the things she says when she's being especially sharp with her words. Bit of a "ur a softie aren't u shadowheart" meme lol

Wyll:

They're both warlocks and both from nobility so there's an inherent connection there.

Since they're both nobles, Cosette desperately wants to see him dance, especially if it's with her!

Wyll was surprised to learn how readily trusting Cosette is with higher magical beings (hags, devils, etc) so I imagine he had to readjust his initial view of her.

He does see that her heart is ultimately in the right place and there's something alluring about her innocence and cheer, but he's worried about her (probably rightly so lol). He's trying his best to steer her in what he believes is the right direction.

On Cosette's part, Wyll kinda embodies a childhood fantasy of a romance with a dashing hero (with a dark side, even!), so she does have a little crush on him.

Gale is currently winning in the romance department for Cosette but there's a little something going on with her and Wyll; we'll see where it goes!

*Extra notes on Lae'zel and Shadowheart:

I think these three make an interesting trio because I get the sense that both Lae'zel and Shadowheart are inexperienced in a lot of areas and are desperately trying to hide it. I know less about Shadowheart's whole backstory and whatnot than Lae'zel's so take it with a grain of salt, but if I'm right Cosette makes a neat foil to both of them bc she too is inexperienced but doesn't try to necessarily hide it. She's not trying to come off as intimidating, unlike the both of them -- Lae'zel with strength and aggression, Shadowheart with wit and disdain.

And then there's Lae'zel and Shadowheart's rivalry with each other, all the while warming up to Cosette, and Cosette being their mediator.

Also something to be said about all three of them being naive in different ways; Lae'zel with her (up until a certain point) unquestioning faith in Vlaakith, I'm guessing something is gonna come to light with Shadowheart and her faith in Shar, and then Cosette is just out here trusting everyone she meets at face value.

[bokutoslittlebird]

Threesome with Bokuto Kōtarō and Akaashi Keiji

Alpha!Bokuto x Beta!Reader x Beta!Akaashi

Warnings: Omegaverse, double penetration, dubcon, creampies, some BokuAka action (bc those are my babies), this is long

Summary: After presenting as a Beta, your mother decided being friends with an Alpha wasn’t good for him. After moving, you befriended another Beta, Akaashi Keiji. After years of not getting over your childhood crush, you never expected to see him again as your best friend’s mate. Akaashi can’t take care of Bokuto through his entire rut, so he lets Bokuto have some fun. There’s a lot of catching up to do between you two, anyways.

— 5 years old, [Y/N]

“You need to stop hanging around that boy, [Y/N],” your mother had said to you one evening. You had looked at her confused, wondering what Kōtarō had to do with your homework. She continued, ignoring the look on your face. “He’s presented as an Alpha. You need to stop hanging around him.”

“That doesn’t matter, mommy. He’s my friend,” you had said, not quite understanding. “I don’t want to hurt him.”

“[Y/N], listen to me. He doesn’t want to be with someone like you. Stop hanging out with him.” At the time, you didn’t understand what your mother was saying. You thought that she had thought your friend didn’t want you as a friend. You’d prove her wrong when you finished your homework.

You had finished the work and immediately went to yours and Kōtarō’s spot, seeing the familiar spiked up hair on the young boy. His frown was unusual, though. “Kō-chan?”

“My mom said we can’t hang out anymore,”

— present day

You woke to the alarm from your phone, the rhythmic beat of the song shooing away the traces of sleep. Your eyes fall to the calendar across your room, seeing you had to work today. With a promise of a hot bath and a treat of ramen after your shift, you are able to get out of bed and get ready to start the day.

Your work shift was simple, just taking orders and making coffee for customers, occasionally bringing treats to customers at the tables. It was normal, right down to when your friend walked in. “Keiji!”

“[Y/N],” he smiled, not having the same enthusiasm but enough to satisfy you. You had met Keiji after you moved, shortly after Kōtarō ended his friendship with you. Keiji had presented as a Beta, just like you, so yours and his mother encouraged playdates and study sessions at each other’s house, hoping a relationship would bloom. “The usual, please,”

“You sure? The season specialty is here! I know you like pumpkin,” your smile turned into a smirk, knowing you had got him when his eyes widened. The season specials were ready to serve, but nobody had switched the menus up.

“Hm, I think I’ll go with the pumpkin latte for today,” he finally said, after weighing his options. You smiled and put in the order, knowing exactly how to work his buttons. “I’ll have to let my boyfriend know,”

“Oh?” That was new information. A week ago, Keiji said he was going to die single because everyone’s an idiot. Now he’s got a lover? “Do tell,”

“He’s an Alpha, but his parents don’t care. Don’t tell mom. She thinks you’re my soulmate, still,”

You guffawed at that, shaking your head at the memory. You remembered when you got older when Keiji’s mom had started giving you lessons in cooking and sewing, typical ‘wife’ things. Keiji smiled at your dramatic scene of laughing, knowing it was how you were.

“Wait till she finds out you’re mated to someone else,”

“I prefer to term courting to mate, since I’m plain and boring. He’s anything but, honestly,”

“Perfect match for you, Kei-chan,” you winked, seeing Keiji’s cheeks turn a bit pink at the inside joke. You laughed again, finishing up the last details on the latte.

“He reminds me a bit of you, actually. But without control or a filter,”

“Maybe I am your soulmate, you just don’t like me,”

“Haha, very funny,” he replied, walking off with a little wave. You wiggle your fingers, waving goodbye to him. After watching your friend leave, your shoulders sag a bit, remembering the young boy with white-and-black hair. Back then, you wouldn’t call it a crush. More of an admiration for the boy with no fears and a clear future. With more experience under your belt, you could admit it was a crush. The boy had stolen your heart and crushed it the last time you saw him.

You clean up the counter as the clock ticks, slowly telling you your shift is coming to a close. You feel like you want to cry, but you don’t know why.

The next day, your phone dings with a text message from Keiji, surprised he would shoot a text. He usually called unless he was busy in a meeting or something. Your eyes glance at the screen, trying to finish your essay for one of your classes. The message doesn’t strike you as immediately needing attention, so you ignore it, focusing on the paragraph you’re typing out.

Another ding takes your attention away from the screen completely, knowing Keiji really needed your attention.

[Keiji ❤️ - 12:17 pm]

- Can you bring some fruits to my apartment? I forgot to get some at the store. I’m busy.

[Keiji ❤️ - 12:18 pm]

- please im hungry

The last message startles you, seeing as Keiji always punctuated his texts because, well, he was like that. You quickly typed a reply and made sure to save your document before heading to your kitchen.

[Sweetcheeks😘 - 12:22 pm]

- I’ll be there asap Kei

— 5 years old, Kōtarō Bokuto

“Kōtarō, I need to talk to you,” his mom had said. He looked up at her, a paper hat on his head, a smile on his face. “You need to stop hanging out with [Y/N] so much, baby,”

“Why? Did we do something bad?” He frowned, not understanding. What did he do?

“No, baby, not this time,” she laughed, smiling down at him. Her smile was not full of love and joy, it was sad. “Her mother doesn’t want you two hanging out so much. She said they’ll be moving soon, so I don’t want you to be hurt anymore than you already will be.”

Kōtarō didn’t smile for the rest of the day. After he told his friend they couldn’t hang out anymore, his mother held him in her arms while he cried. It wasn’t fair.

— present day

Kōtarō had been sent home early, with his rut steadily approaching and his fights with Atsumu and Shūgo getting more intense. His ride home was full of anxiety, knowing Keiji couldn’t quite handle ruts very well since he was a Beta. Omegas were meant to handle Alpha ruts all the way through, but Keiji could only handle half of the rut. The last time Kōtarō’s cycle had started, Keiji had to come to where he was, huddled up in an apartment. Keiji couldn’t walk two days after the rut ended, even though he dealt with three out of seven days of the rut.

Kōtarō’s arrival to Keiji’s apartment was slow. His instincts told him to run, but he was able to restrain himself. Keiji opened the door almost immediately after the knock, wrapping his boyfriend in a hug. “I’ve missed you,”

“I’ve missed you, too, Akaashi,” Kōtarō said, indulging in the coffee and minty scent from Keiji, although there was a bit of pumpkin, too. He involuntary let out a growl.

“I had a pumpkin latte earlier,” Keiji immediately said, expecting Kōtarō’s reaction. Instincts came first the closer he got to his rut, Keiji had learned. He could feel the Alpha deflate a bit in his hold, just hugging and scenting. Keiji smiled at that, knowing he would be in for a rough week. “I made a nest. It’s not as good as an Omega’s-“

“You didn’t have to do that,” Kōtarō’s voice was clear and sharp, halting anything Keiji was saying. “You’re not an Omega. You don’t have to act like one,”

“I-I know, Bokuto-san,” Keiji stuttered out, the look in his boyfriend’s eyes startling him a bit. It was intense, but it wasn’t necessarily bad, per se. “I just-“

“I’m not here right now because of your sub-gender. I’m here for you,” Kōtarō’s voice was once again clear and sharp, going right into Keiji’s bones. He’s sure if he was an Omega, he’d be kneeling and begging. For fuck’s sake, he’d have probably entered a heat cycle.

“I know, Bokuto-san. I know,” Keiji leaned against him, reveling in his smell. He couldn’t scent Kōtarō or smell a distinct scent, but Kōtarō obviously came straight to the apartment after practice. He smelled like sweat and deodorant, a strangely pleasant combination.

Kōtarō let out a growl as he felt his rut come on, his hands moving towards Keiji’s ass. In turn, Keiji blushed and cleared his throat, backing up from Kōtarō. He smiled and held up a finger. Kōtarō grinned, straightening his posture. Keiji smiled and ran towards the bedroom, knowing his Alpha was hot on his heels.

The following day, the two lovers were still going at it. Keiji hardly had any rest, only getting his rest once Kōtarō needed to rest, even if Kōtarō claimed he passed out after their third round. A small tease and a mischievous grin had sent Keiji back to being railed by a feral Alpha, but he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Keiji threw his head into the pillows, drool spilling from his lips and he moaned, having his third orgasm of the day from Kōtarō’s forceful thrusts. On the other hand Kōtarō had only orgasmed once, knotting Keiji and spurring the Beta into a second orgasm almost right after the first. The thrusts didn’t cease, Kōtarō chasing his own release in his mate was the only thought in his mind.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, Keiji,” he groaned out, plugging him up with another knot, his orgasm following it. Keiji’s eyes rolled back, digging his nails into Kōtarō’s biceps at the sensation. It stung and was a lot more pain than pleasure, but he couldn’t complain too much.

Kōtarō finished painting Keiji’s walls white, resting his forehead against the man underneath him and catching his breath. Keiji gave him a swift peck on the lips, assuring him he was okay. However, Keiji’s stomach growled at that moment, sending heat to his cheeks.

“I haven’t eaten today,” he realized, talking out loud. Kōtarō may have been an Alpha in a rut, but he was also an Alpha with a mate. Mates needed to be protected and cared for, so his instincts told him he needed to feed his mate. Kōtarō’s eyes immediately went wide. “Don’t move!”

“Ah— sorry! I always forget,” he laughed, adjusting their position so he could lay on his side. Keiji just shook his head, smiling. Kōtarō was a wonderful mate, truly, he just happened to be overly passionate about things he cared for.

Keiji thought to you, how you’d probably enjoy having an Alpha to take care of you. Keiji knew you often overworked yourself and forced yourself to do things, trying to be as independent as possible. He couldn’t be your mate, but he’s had a thought that ends in all sides benefitting - hopefully, at least.

Kōtarō moaned as he slipped from Keiji’s abused hole, the knot finally deflating. “I’ll get you a snack.”

“I have leftovers in the fridge. Bottom left drawer,” he mumbled back, wincing from moving too much. Kōtarō immediately nodded, jogging off to the kitchen, butt-naked. Keiji couldn’t say much. He enjoyed the view.

He winced as he rolled over to his phone, glad he put it on the charger near the Nest yesterday before he got pounded into the mattress. He opened the messages, typing out a quick message for you and sending. He hoped his plan would work out well, but he had faith his calculations were correct.

Hearing the microwave beep meant the food was ready and Keiji still hadn’t gotten a response from you. He typed out another message, hoping you’d actually read this one and put his phone on the floor, face down. Just in time, too, as Kōtarō walked into the bedroom with a freshly heated plate of food.

“Food’s ready!”

— back to you

You had gathered some fruits together, slicing and dicing them as an added flair. Sliced bananas, strawberries, diced watermelon, mangoes, and sliced avocados on slices of bread and cream cheese. You felt like an American middle-aged woman about to attend a brunch with your food choices, but Keiji liked specific fruits specific ways and you knew he only ate avocados on bread with cream cheese.

The ride to Keiji’s apartment only took five minutes, but it felt like it took an hour, your anxiety eating you up at the thought of what Keiji is doing or needs help with. You assumed he needed help with something, but you weren’t positive on what. It could just be as simple as he can’t leave home because his anxiety was too high or it could be something worse — what if his mom got in an accident? The thoughts didn’t stop, making the five minutes much, much longer.

Arriving to Keiji’s apartment, you noticed how dead it seemed outside. You saw a woman on the way up the stairs who gasped as she left her apartment, quickly locking the door and running down the stairs, almost running into you. Confused, you noticed the lights seemed to be off in the other apartments, but that wasn’t too strange. It was a Saturday, but it was midday so people were probably out.

You had a spare key for Keiji’s place, seeing as you often checked up on him; he had a spare for your place, too. Entering the apartment, it was deathly quiet, putting you on edge. There was a certain air about the room that made you feel like you were in a horror movie. As you made your way to the kitchen, you noticed the messily placed dishes in the sink, the shirt in the hallway leading to Keiji’s bedroom, and the duffel bag beside the door. You’re confused. Keiji doesn’t have a duffel bag — not since the old one ripped a couple of years ago.

You ponder whether to go into Keiji’s bedroom or not, worried someone might’ve broken in —that shirt is definitely not his. That’s when you feel a presence. At first, you freeze, wondering if Keiji’s playing a trick on you. It is October after all. You place the container of fruits on the counter and hear a growl, immediately turning around to meet golden eyes and familiar hair.

His eyes were narrowed, obviously pissed, but then his face changed. He seemed confused first, then a dawning came upon him. Next thing you know, you’re picked up and having the life squeezed out of you. “[Y/N]!”

“Kō?” Your tiny voice whispers. You can hardly believe it. Your ex-best friend and childhood crush is in your best friend’s apart— uh oh. “Uh oh,”

“What-Oh?” His voice repeats, looking at you. The Alpha of your dreams is the Alpha of Keiji’s dreams—what a day it’s been. “[Y/N]?”

“I should, um, can you let me down?” He obliged, letting you stand on your feet again. “I need to, um, go. Uh, Keiji wanted fruits so I, uh, brought them. I’m gonna go,” you turned, hoping to tears would stay in until you left. You weren’t expecting Kōtarō to cage you in, effectively trapping you. As a Beta, you didn’t immediately obey an Alpha’s command, but the look in his eyes told you to stay. You obeyed.

“Don’t go. Please,” is all he said, his eyes twinkling. You shook your head, deciding this was a bad idea. “[Y/N].”

“You don’t get to act like nothing happened, Bokuto-san. You stopped being friends with me, remember? I expected you to be breeding an Omega by now. Looks like it was just me,” you spat, feeling the anger you held in boil over. The feeling of your best friend leaving you because of your sub-gender, the feeling of betrayal, remembering how your mother sighed at you and rolled her eyes, telling you she was always right and your friend would never look your way again.

“What?” He peered down at you, no longer hunching over. You realized just how tall he had gotten. “I stopped being friends because you were leaving. You being a Beta had nothing to do with it,”

“Sure, I guess now it doesn’t. Since, you know, you’re with my new best friend. It’s okay, I get it,” you once again tried to leave, but Kōtarō wouldn’t budge. “Move, Bokuto-san.”

“No.” His voice was clear and sharp. You were sure if you were an Omega, you’d be on your knees crying. “I don’t want it to end like this. I want to make amends.” Good thing you weren’t an Omega.

“Well, I don’t care what you want. Let me go,” your own eyes narrowed at him, his face not changing. His body unmoving. You rolled your eyes, deciding to not play this game anymore. Going to duck under Kōtarō’s arm, but his body moved to pin you to the counter. “Dude!”

“You smell different.” Is all the warning you got before you felt his nose in your neck. You felt butterflies at the contact, but also cringed at the display. You then noticed a shadow in the hallway. Attempting to pry Kōtarō off you wasn’t working, so Keiji got to see his boyfriend hunched over you.

“Good, you seem to be getting along again,” he said, a gentle and lazy smile on his face. Surprisingly, Kōtarō didn’t turn around at his mate’s voice, just kept rubbing his nose against you. “I hope you can take care of him,”

“Akaashi Keiji, what the fuck,” you muttered. He didn’t seem concerned his boyfriend was currently nuzzling against you. You noticed the limp in Keiji’s walk and he had one of his hands on the wall.

“I’ve been keeping track of your cycle. You should be ovulating by now. Bokuto-san has told me about his childhood friend before and it took me a while but I figured out it was you,” Keiji kept talking, limping his way to the couch. “I’ll get the fruits later. Bokuto-san, don’t hurt her too much,”

“Hurt me?” You squeaked, eyes widening at the implication. “Keiji, I can’t—“ you started, a scream interrupting your sentence as Kōtarō picked you up and hauled you to the bedroom. He displayed his strength earlier, of course, but the fact you were were on your back in what looked similar to an Omega’s Nest within seconds of the ground leaving your feet was a display that turned you on immensely. If Kōtarō wasn’t currently attempting to strip you, he would have been with the sickly sweet scent you exuded.

“I’ve been waiting for this,” he growls out, his hands deciding to rip your very nice shirt into shreds, deciding your movements to get them off were too slow. He offered the same treatment to your bra, your short scream of disbelief when it was torn. He was nice enough to pull off the pants you were wearing, along with your panties. “Ever since my first rut,” he continues, his nose buried against your thighs, his tongue licking a hot stripe against it. You whined at the contact, full on knowing he could smell your arousal. “I thought I’d never find you again.”

“Boku-“

“No. Not here. Call me your Alpha, little Beta,”

“Uh-“ you stopped, unsure of the situation. Kōtarō, regardless of your feelings, was with Keiji. That alone made you hesitant, even if Keiji literally told Kōtarō to go for it. You felt weird having to call him your Alpha anyways, since you were never subjected to those Alpha/Omega relationships. You can’t say you weren’t interested in it, often just having fun with other Betas and maybe an Alpha or two during their ruts (you vividly remember helping an attractive Alpha in your last year at Nekoma, rendering you unable to walk for the next two days). Neither of them called you by your sub-gender, nor made you call them Alpha. You obviously hesitated, taking a trip down memory lane much too long, since Kōtarō’s hand had wrapped itself around your jaw, forcing you to look at him. You didn’t think your old childhood friend would be so.. rough.

“I’m waiting, little one. Call me your Alpha,” he growled out, again. The growling was doing wonders to you, making you wetter by the second. Another growl came out, spurring you to speak.

“I- Alpha, we can’t do this. We need to talk-“

“You can try to talk, but I’m gonna fill you to the brim until my cum is seeping out of your cunt. Let’s see how well you do.” Kōtarō immediately went down to your nether regions, your folds glistening to show him just how turned on you were. Your face was hot, practically burning when his eyes locked on, unmoving from the sight. He wasn’t looking long, getting a startled scream from you as he buried his face between your legs, lapping at your juices. Your hand went to his hair, the hair as soft as you had hoped, as he continued to drink from your pussy as if it was his last drink on earth. Your other hand was bunching up a nearby shirt, one you had left at Keiji’s two days ago after a night of drinks. If you weren’t so busy rolling your eyes into your skull as your mouth hung open, moans spilling from your lips, you’d have noticed the mix of yours and Keiji’s clothes in the Nest.

Kōtarō continued to be relentless, pushing two fingers into your heat as you were clenching your thighs around his head. You were worried you’d hurt him, but he was an Alpha in every shape and form — if he wanted to stop you, he’d do it. He knows he’s in control. Adding a third finger brought you to your first orgasm of the day, feeling exhausted afterwards. Kōtarō rose from between your legs, his eyes immediately finding your glossy ones. He smiled and licked his lips. Then, wiping the slick from his lower face with his hand to get the excess that his tongue couldn’t get and then licking it off, his eyes never breaking contact.

“So sweet, I’m already addicted,” his grin got darker, his body crawling up until his hands were on both sides of your head and his lips were slotted against yours. His tongue darted between his lips, into your already open mouth, deepening the kiss. You were so in bliss from the after-orgasm high and kissing your crush, you didn’t even feel the head of Kōtarō’s cock pushing into you.

Kōtarō threw his head back, moaning at the tight fit. You mewled, it being some time since someone entered you, the feeling almost foreign. It didn’t hurt, thankfully, the wetness Kōtarō created more than enough to help him slide in. He didn’t stop, he just kept pushing in until the beginning of his knot was flush against you. Another growl erupted from Kōtarō, the only warning you got before he pulled out only to slam back in. The sudden movement had your back arching and your head against the plush pillows of the Nest. It was the green light for Kōtarō.

Your knees were pushed to your shoulders, the position momentarily uncomfortable until your mind was replaced with the burning and overwhelming sensation of Kōtarō pounding into you liked a man starved. Moans were bouncing off the walls, along with Kōtarō’s grunts, mixed with the sound of skin slapping skin as his thighs continuously met your ass. Your hands switched from fisting fabric to winding around Kōtarō’s neck as he buried his face into your neck, his panting and grunts loud in your ears. You felt the coming of another orgasm, the familiar tightening in your abdomen and the arching of your back being a few indicators. Your nails raked against Kōtarō’s back, leaving angry red streaks in their place. Another grunt from Kōtarō and you felt a painful sensation you hadn’t felt before — a knot. The added pain before the height of your pleasure sent you over the edge, mewling out Kōtarō’s name as you did.

Kōtarō had you plugged up, him spilling his seed into your hot walls. You whined at the feeling of fullness. He sighed at the feeling himself, indulging in your scent. You figured now was as good as you’re going to get to talk. “Um, Kōt-“

“Alpha.”

“Sorry,” you mumbled, rolling your eyes. “Alpha, um, this is an awkward time, I suppose, but can we talk about, like, us?”

“We don’t need to, but we can,” he looked at you, moving his position so you guys were on your sides. More comfortable for each other. “What do you wanna talk about?”

“Okay, um, the Alpha thing is weird, but I’ll let it slide since obviously you’re in a rut. Obviously Keiji isn’t an Omega, so he can’t take you throughout the entire rut. Um, I don’t wanna be your booty call for ruts, this whole situation is so fucking weird-!”

“You’re not the ‘booty call’, as you said. Akaashi mentioned he had a surprise for me, but I didn’t think he’d offer me you. After this, I hope he lets me court you, too. So I can be your Alpha, too.”

“Kō- Alpha, we’re no longer friends because you’re an Alpha. That’s why you broke off our friendship so long ago, isn’t that right? You deserved an Omega, which I am not, but you found Keiji and that is fine. I am not a part of this.”

“I don’t care about sub-genders. That’s why I’m with Akaashi. I stopped being friends because you were moving. It hurt a lot to end things, but I didn’t know what else to do. That was Mom’s advice, at least.”

You were confused. Your mother said it was because he cared about sub-genders, but now he’s saying it was because of the move? Your friendship ended before moving, yes, but it was almost a month before moving. You could have stayed friends, anyways. Did your mother lie to you? Did his feelings change? “My- My mother said you needed an Omega so I-“

“She was wrong. She’s the one who set you up with Akaashi, yeah? She didn’t even care what my family thought about us. That’s in the past, we can move past it.”

“All these years...” you muttered, feeling the tears from before coming back. The knowledge that your own mother forced your friendship to end made you angry, but everything was fine now. Kōtarō was your friend again. At least, you thought he was. “I don’t know if I want a relationship, though,”

“Too bad,” he grunted, his cock leaving you feeling empty. A whine was all you needed to do to have yourself pinned under Kōtarō again, his cock filling you up again. “I’ve been dreaming of this for so long, as if I’ll let you leave so easily.”

Kōtarō continued his relentless pounding into you, the constant fucking rendering your lower area numb. Eventually, your world went black after a— what was it, 6th orgasm? Kōtarō’s second knot was the only thing you remembered before you tuned out completely. The grunting, whines, moans, all of it faded into silence. While you had passed out, Kōtarō panicked, thinking he went overboard. Keiji’s words echoed in his mind: “Don’t hurt her too much.” Was this too much?

Kōtarō, stuck inside you because of his knot, called for Keiji to help him. Of course, Keiji came as fast as he could (not very fast, poor man is still recovering) to see Kōtarō, who is close to tears, above your blissed, fucked, and passed out form. He sighs, shaking his head. “Bokuto-san, I think you went too hard,”

“Akaashi...” he whined, his strong arms curling around you. Even passed out, your body reacted, curling into him as you softly moaned. “Akaashi...”

“It’s okay, she’ll be fine. Her body isn’t used to it. At least, not yet.” A moan from Kōtarō let Keiji know his knot had deflated, him pulling out of your cunt and the copious amounts of cum he filled you with spilling out. It made even Keiji aroused, seeing it seeping out of you. Kōtarō knew he was aroused at the sight and came upon a solution.

“Akaashi! Maybe we...”

Waking up was next thing you remember. You felt so, so full, like you were plugged up in both ends. As you flutter your eyes open. You expected to see your ceiling, having woken up from intense dream or something. You maybe even hoped to see Kōtarō grinning down at you, sweat dripping down his face and his chest. You did not, however, expect to see Keiji smiling down at you, gently caressing your face. “Kei?”

“Hey there, pretty baby. How are you feeling?” The nickname threw you off — Keiji never called you a nickname. He was very formal, even saying your last name until only recently. You obviously showed confusion, or maybe you hesitated, because a rumble was felt behind you, a familiar voice following.

“She’s probably feeling pretty stuffed, Akaashi. Stuffed full inside and out, I hope,” Kōtarō’s voice said. You turned your head, hissing at the pain in your neck, to see Kōtarō grinning at you, just like you hoped. However, wasn’t Keiji resting?

“I should thank you for the fruit. It was delicious and cut up so cutely and delicately. I was getting a bit jealous to hear Kōtarō having so much fun with you. I was hoping to have my own fun with you when he rested after his rut, but he was kind enough to share. Isn’t that nice? I don’t think I can get you pregnant, but I want to try. We’d have such cute babies together, you know?”

“I was hoping she’d carry my pups first, but you can pump her full next time. We have all the time in the world, after all.”

“Excuse me? Wait, wait!” You shouted, suddenly realizing the whole ‘filling you up’ speech wasn’t just an Alpha’s instincts — it was their intention to impregnate you. “I can’t have kids! I’m in school and-“

“I can provide for both of my mates, right Keiji?” Kōtarō said, his eyes holding nothing but love as he gazed at Keiji. It made your heart squeeze at the love between them. Keiji smiled and nodded, deciding at that time to roll his hips. You threw your head back and mewled, sensitive from the consecutive orgasms previously.

“I’m glad you’re still sensitive. There’s no evidence to back it up, but I heard the more orgasms a woman has, the more likely it is she’ll get pregnant. Of course, Omegas have a fertile cycle, but you’re a Beta, so I had to track your cycle for about three months. I hope it was enough.”

“Three months?! Akaashi Kei- oh!” You screamed, feeling Kōtarō move. He was filling up your back entrance, adding to the fullness. Also, it explained why you were on his chest.

“I also need to cut out your caffeine, that’s a bad habit you need to cut out anyways. No more nights of drinking while binge-eating. Your body needs to be in peak condition if it’s going to carry our offspring,”

“I can’t wait till you’re all swollen and wobbling. It’ll be so cute. And then we’ll do it again. And again. And I don’t know if I wanna stop, babe!” Kōtarō laughed, thrusting his hips up, making you jerk at the feeling.

“Maybe we can stop after five. We’ll need a bigger house, too,” Keiji continued, rolling his hips in rhythm to Kōtarō’s thrusts. You closed your eyes, one hand fisting Kōtarō’s hair while the other gripped Keiji’s shoulder, hoping to ground yourself. “You’ll look so beautiful when you’re pregnant. This is what our families want, after all. You’ll bear my children and Kōtarō also gets what he wants in the end. He gets his own offspring. This all works out,” he grunted, snapping his hips after almost pulling all the way out. “In the end, at least.”

If you could form a coherent sentence, you’d tell them to stop, but the only thing on your mind was how stuffed you were. Keiji was thrusting into your puffy, abused cunt that was overflowing with Kōtarō’s cum, rolling his hips every so often to increase pleasure. Kōtarō’s grunts were heightening your arousal and sending you hurling towards another orgasm. Your eyes rolled, your tongue sticking out as you clenched around Keiji, sending him towards an orgasm of his own. A curse and a stutter of his hips and he was spilling his own seed into you. He knew his genes wouldn’t take, not when you’d been pumped by Kōtarō multiple times. He had looked for the chances between a Beta and Alpha genes in a Beta, but he only got Omegas, which were made to take Alpha seed and breed easily. A small part of him wanted to try and overpower Kōtarō, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to compare to the amount you’ve already taken.

Kōtarō was still going, his strong, warm hands holding your knees to your chest, keeping you spread open, as he thrusted up into you. He knew Keiji had finished, the face he was sporting a familiar scene to the Alpha, so Kōtarō was chasing his own high. A high-pitched whine from you as Keiji rolled his hips again, earning a growl from Kōtarō in return. You pant as your hand leaves Keiji’s shoulder, ghosting over your sensitive clit as you attempt to close your thighs, overly sensitive from all the rounds you’ve been forced to go through. Keiji saw your hand brush over it, taking his own hand to replace yours and apply pressure onto the nub, rubbing it.

A scream was ripped from your throat, another orgasm around Keiji’s cock as Kōtarō buried himself, shoving his knot in your tight hole. You were twitching at the extra feeling of fullness, the hot spurts of cum in your ass and the oozing cum from your cunt, even if Keiji was plugging you up. A sigh escaped your lips, your eyes rolling back as he attempted to catch your breath. Kōtarō brought a hand to fondle your breast, earning another whine for him.

“I could get used to this,”

“So could I. Good thing we’ll get to see much more of it,”

You normally would have told them no, attempting to push Keiji off and out of you, but you just sighed, trying to kiss Kōtarō. He smiled and obliged, licking your lips before kissing you, enjoying the taste of you. Keiji smiled at the scene, bringing his mouth to your perky nipple from Kōtarō’s earlier fondling, biting gently on it. You mewled, shifting your legs up Keiji’s hips and he moved in deeper. Kōtarō growled, his hand rubbing the red and swollen nub between your legs. You wouldn’t normally let this continue, but you could hardly think.

If you could think properly, you might have noticed the bags of clothes you don’t remember bringing to Keiji’s. You might have seen the handcuffs nearby. You might have seen the extra lock on the bedroom door, so out of place. You normally would have been able to think properly, but the only thing you could think of was being stuffed with Keiji’s and Kōtarō’s thick cocks, filling you up to the brim.

Sequel -> The Perfect Family [tw includes dubcon/noncon, use of the word r*pe, water torture/attempted drowning, gunplay, pregnancy, blood, abuse (mentally and physically), bit of watersports]

[actuallys8n]

Watching All Your Friends Get Rich

Itadori Yuji x gn!reader

 | | warnings | | : gn!reader (they:them pronouns), alcohol consumption (characters are aged up bc of this), bar/club + mild depressive themes, overall flirty and cute though

| a / n | : alright ya’ll… here’s one for the soft homies. no smut for now. this has been sitting in my drafts and she needs to see the light.

based loosely (heavily in the beginning lol) on the song above - by one of my favorite bands rn) i stand by my choice that when itadori is old enough, he will be drinking on fruity cocktails. he’s no a bitter boy. i hope you likes!!

| word count | : 2.8k

Yuji released a long, exasperated sigh– palms brunting the weight of his body as he sat leaned back against his best friend's wooden porch steps. Pink sandstone hair caught in a warm prenoon breeze blew out of his vision to reveal the brilliant blue sky overhead and he took a moment to close his eyes and bask in the sun’s warmth. It wasn’t often he felt moments of peace like this.

Though it wasn’t every morning, the man was finding that more and more frequently he would awake to beautiful spring sunrises, birds chirping and a gaping hole in his chest. A void of nothingness that left him pinned to his bed. The cool white sheets resting against his skin felt heavier than lead and his brain throbbed with overstimulation as his sleepy eyes tried to adjust to his dimly lit room. Yuji would wonder to himself why he had to be woken up so early, that he desperately wanted to sleep away the rest of his life instead of face another pointless day.

This particular morning had been one of those— the emptiness stuck around a little longer than usual while Yuji tried to go about his normal routine. After a hot, hot shower and a bowl or two of his favorite breakfast cereal he found himself outside trying to enjoy the very sunshine that tore him from his dreams earlier in the day. However his long-desired tranquility was quick to be interrupted when Megumi’s sleek black sedan pulled into their shared driveway.

“Half day today?” Yuji asked at the slam of a car door, relieving his forearms of their stress to cross them behind his head and allowing his body to rest further into the porch steps. Megumi snickered at the memory of his mundane workday as he pressed the lock button on his keys and stepped over the friend who was reclined on their porch.

“Something like that. I’m surprised you’re up so early,” The dark haired man spared a glance at his phone screen– 11:43am. “Not even noon yet.”

Yuji’s teeth clenched as he bit out a laugh. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, the little berating remarks his roommate liked to throw out wore on his mind over time. He was the last of his friends to find his place in the world; lost and floating aimlessly in a never ending sea of possibility. So many choices, how was he supposed to pick just one?

It was this notion that left him stuck on those porch steps for what seemed like an eternity. While friends and family grow around him, he remains still– stagnant by uncertainty, waiting for one interesting event after the next. Whichever fix comes along first.

One way or another, jobless or not, Megumi didn’t really care about his friend’s social status. In his mind it seemed much easier to pay the bills himself rather than worry over the reliability of a roommate. And that’s why Yuji hung around.

While his other relationships were surely meaningful and important to him, no one had really stepped up like Megumi did. Though it was simply just putting a roof over the poor boy’s head and ensuring he remembered to feed himself, it’s still something.

Despite the emptiness, despite the constant reminders that he was nothing — Yuji continued to laugh like he always had while his best friend unknowingly chipped away at his pride.

“I slept all day yesterday,” He grumbled, skin on his cheeks dusted with pink over embarrassment or sun exposure– he wasn’t sure. “Couldn’t stay in bed anymore.”

Megumi smiled at his friend’s simplicity, completely ignorant towards the overflowing swell of anguish and defeat Yuji felt so suffocated by. The younger of the two had spent years hounding himself over coursework and exams only to be met with his dream career and more fat stacks of paperwork. This quickly made him realize he found things like Itadori Yuji to be relaxing. The simpler, the better.

Much to his friend’s chagrin, of course.

“Doesn’t sound like a bad day.” Megumi chided as he walked through the door of their shared home and hung his keys on the hook nearby. “Wanna trade?”

Yuji eyed his friend's luxury car before returning his gaze back to the sky.

“To be honest, yeah.”

‘Would ‘ya quit your whining and go order a drink already?!” Nobara snapped with a slam of her palm against the black bar table– four nearly empty glasses quivering and clanking under her fury. Yuji stuck his lip out and sunk further into his chair with a deep frown etched on to his features.

“I ain’t whining…”

Nobara, nearly beside herself at her friend’s pitiful response, sucked in a breath in preparation to scream an argument into his face but was quickly cut off by Megumi.

“Yes you are.”

Pleased with her new support, the short haired girl shot Yuji a toothy grin and crossed her arms across her chest. She was always so sure of herself, a quality Yuji found admirable and annoying. Though he usually made a point to keep his jealousy in check, today simply wasn’t a day in which he could easily ignore the feelings eating away at his brain. And unfortunately for him, Nobara had picked up on it the second he walked through the door.

The girl's smug restitution was quickly stripped away when Megumi grabbed his pink haired pouty friend by the arm and yanked him up out of his seat to drag him towards the neon-lined bar.

“But you also asked him why he was sulking, so did you expect him not to whine?”

Nobara’s vision went crimson as Yuji’s retreating form stuck his tongue out at her mockingly behind Megumi’s back.

The dark haired man let out a soft sigh, intentions of only getting one drink seemingly long gone as he made his second approach to the bar with Yuji in tow. His friends were exhausting most of the time, but it was pretty rare that he had to actually convince Yuji to relax. Megumi slid his card across the glass countertop and opened a new tab whilst punching a fist into the shoulder of the weary friend beside him. “Order something.”

Yuji, feigning injury and rubbing his arm with another sad expression, begrudgingly turned to the bartender to mutter out a drink order.

“Just a strawberry margarita, please.”

You smiled at the cute boy ordering and began prepping his drink. Ice, limes, tequila, citrus liqueur and fresh strawberries… “On the rocks or blended?”

The pinkette paused, making eye contact with you for the first time since he’d been pulled up to the bar. With a response lodged firmly in his throat, all the poor man could do was ogle at you. The dimly lit room did little to aid his eyes while he greedily took in your features; easily one of the most perfect human beings he’d ever had the fortune of looking at. Club glitter clung to your skin and shimmered back at him under the flashing colored lights of the bar– pink, blue and orange all flickering to the bass of some random pop song he’d never heard.

Like a camera lens focusing in on its subject, the rest of the world around him became blurred and unimportant. You stared back at him with a quirked brow, confusion settling over your beautiful features while he simply continued to gawk.

Megumi, call it foresight– had since turned on his heel and made his quick escape back to the table with the others, leaving Yuji to embarrass himself as he pleases.

You stared back at the pink haired boy, an awkward silence settling in nicely as the club’s bass continued to thunder around you. “Uh… are you okay, guy? I’ve got other customers to help you know.”

Yuji’s eyes went wide at the realization that he’d been staring at you like a lost little kid and he quickly spit out his reply: on the rocks. You nodded with another quick grin before twisting the lid onto the cocktail mixer and turning away from him to fill a new glass with ice. Working at a club came with its fair share of awkward and weird experiences– so something as simple as another drunk admirer wasn’t enough to shake you. Plus money is money, something you were always finding yourself in desperate need of.

While working a cocktail bar isn’t always an ideal career option, it puts food on your table and keeps your lights on, so it’ll have to do until something more exciting presents itself. You scooped a heaping spoonful of ice into the short glass with a small huff at the thought of your electricity bill. This fool better leave a tip…

With your back now turned to him, Yuji took a chance to run his hands through his hair and internally curse his own anxiety for betraying him in that moment. Naturally he had to act like a total buffoon the second he laid eyes on someone attractive– it was his curse. He was cursed with the inability to socially perform around someone like you. This must be your fault… right?

Idiot, idiot, idiot… Play it cool.

Another sigh and a loud ‘clink’ when the contents of the mixer poured into the chilled glass, you faced the stranger again and slid the dewy cup across the counter towards him. To your surprise he was actually paying attention this time, his large hand darting up to meet the beverage before it slid off the bar. He sent you a dazzling smile in return and brought a shaky hand up to his face to take a sip, all the while praying you didn’t notice the liquid embarrassingly sloshing around the cup.

Yuji was being the exact opposite of cool.

Luckily for him though, you had quickly been pulled away by another customer and their list of drinks at the other end of the bar. Sweet strawberry filled his parched mouth in two large gulps, completely emptying the glass in a matter of seconds. The salty tequila barely registered on his tongue but the familiar warmth that always accompanied it arose in the back of his throat regardless. Nervous brown eyes darted between you and his already empty glass. You were the only person working that he wanted to bother to make his drinks, but as far as he could tell you were exactly that– the only person working.

Cursing a high tolerance or perhaps even cheap tequila, a still sober Yuji languidly swirled the ice around the bottom of the glass while he waited for his next chance with the cute bartender. The black countertop was cool against the back of his forearms after he set his cup down and turned around to lean into the bar and scour the dark room for the first time since he’d arrived.

Every club he went to was the same really. People of all kinds in cropped outfits and fishnets– getting pushed around or bouncing off other sweaty dancing drunk bodies in a sad attempt to get closer to the front of the stage. It felt like a giant human pinball machine– flashy lights, loud music and all.

“Done already?” You said loudly, grabbing the attention of your pink haired customer over the music. He smirked over his broad shoulder at you and sheepishly rubbed the back of his head with a breathy laugh.

Oof– none of your customers were ever this good-looking.

A hot blush spread over your cheeks as you quickly reached forward and plucked the empty glass from beside the man.

“If you’ve got time for another…” He started before you deftly cut him off with a bright smile.

“‘Course I do! It’s what I get paid for.”

Yuji’s stomach exploded into butterflies at the sight of your flirty smile, prior anxiety carried away with the flap of their little wings in his gut. He watched silently over his shoulder while you quickly threw together a double, your expert fingers sliding across the various glasses adorning the shelf above your head before –tink– landing on the perfect size.

“Hope your boyfriend doesn’t mind me feeding you all this alcohol.” You chided with a laugh, carefully pouring two shots into the mixer. It was Yuji’s turn to blush.

“B-boyfriend?!” He choked, whipping around to face you completely and slam his hands against the bar in disbelief. “Megumi isn’t–”

He paused at the memory of his roommate sliding a sleek black Express card over to you earlier.

Oh my god they totally think I’m a loser.

“Honestly I’d rather say he is my boyfriend, because that’s less lame than the truth. But unfortunately I am single and just taking advantage of a wealthy friend.”

You shot him another smile without looking away from the mixer that you were now emptying into a tall chilled glass.

“You don’t need to defend yourself to me, not like I’m exactly rolling in dough either.” You said with a shrug of your shoulders, gesturing towards the rough scenery surrounding the two of you.

Little by little, Yuji could feel himself finally relaxing– and he hadn’t even had his next drink yet.

“Working here has gotta be better than not working at all!” He was right, you couldn’t deny that. You’d rather be working at a dead-end job than be stuck in your parents’ home the rest of your life. Besides, your coworkers weren’t all that bad and the tips definitely made up for most of the awkward experiences. “I need to find me one of these type’a gigs.” Yuji continued.

The end of his sentence was met with the loud tap of a full margarita glass being set near his hand– one which was gladly accepted. He reveled in the salty-sweet bite of the drink as it went down for the second time that night, albeit much slower this time.

Looking around at the other customers lining the bar, you noticed none of them seemed to be particularly interested in a refill quite yet. Your eyes landed back on the man before you, he was extremely charming whether he knew it or not, and his cute features certainly helped. But he also seemed painfully aloof– like someone with their head stuck in the clouds. The thought made you chuckle, partially at the humor in his innocence and partially out of jealousy that he seemed fairly content with his position in that moment. Single, no goals, lost in the world. We aren’t all that different now, are we?

Surely he didn’t make it sound like he wanted to be unemployed, and you knew just as well as anyone else finding employment is a job in itself. So could he really be that content? You sighed.

“Well you can’t work here,” You smiled again when you were met with his wide eyed stare. “Your cute face would be way too distracting for me.”

Oh my god, you thought as the skin on his face turned a shade of pink that matched fruity drink, nearly choking on the sip he’d just taken. He’s adorable.

“Y-you don’t mean that!” Yuji spouted, glass now abandoned on the bar as his hands waved near the front of his chest in defense. His expression was hard to read, but only because he himself didn’t even know what to think. Up until now he was pretty sure you were just being nice– he didn’t want to convince himself that you’d been paying special attention to him only to get his feelings crushed that you’re not interested, you're just doing your job. It was going to take hard and direct flirting to break through his thick skull.

You covered your mouth with your hand, hiding your grin as you laughed at him while he sputtered on his alcohol and furiously tried to deny your comment. Poor Yuji’s face was only getting redder because he was beginning to realize he needed to shut up, but it was so hard when your cute laugh tickled at his eardrums and your dazzling smile lit up his entire life. He wanted to make you laugh forever.

Smile not once faltering, you reached across the bar to take hold of one of his flailing hands and give it a single, firm shake. “Chill out dork. You’re really cute, take it or leave it.”

Yuji froze, eyes now locked on to your own. “Take it.” he responded dumbly, his hand relaxing in your grip. You couldn’t help but laugh again because he really is that simple…

You decided at that moment the last twenty minutes of your shift would only be spent bussing the part of the bar where he sat– your coworker who’d just started her shift could handle the remaining customers still sober enough to order more drinks until you were off. Your new favorite customer remained planted in his seat the whole time, long abandoned by his perceptive friends and completely captivated by your existence.

masters list i hope you liked it!! first time posting something like this…

[thefools-journey]

So. Some of you may be wondering why we haven’t written a whole ton about the secondaries or what have you. Here’s the reason: we were waiting for them to end before we really dug into the problems we were noticing. We felt that it was only fair to wait for the routes to finish so that we had an understanding of the writers’ vision. Who knew, we thought, maybe they would see the problems themselves and course correct, maybe they are building to something we can’t quite see yet and these issues will have actual payoff, maybe-

In light of Muriel and Lucio’s endings, and the general mess that has dominated Portia’s route for a year plus now, we are breaking our silence. We are actually going to talk about this shit show.

The fandom at large has talked about a bunch of issues with the secondaries but for me, the cardinal sin, the thing that really all the issues lead back to, is this: the writers lost sight of the tarot themes which so strongly defined and held together the primary routes. Let me explain.

The primary routes each center around three thematic cores:

The Love Interest’s Major Arcana and its Reversed/Upright meanings

The MC’s Fool’s Journey, both how it can go right and how it can go wrong

A question about the MC’s identity and their relationship to said identity

Asra’s route asks: Who was the MC? How does the MC navigate a past they cannot and will not remember? What do they owe a past they cannot remember? How do they handle the revelations of what Asra, Nadia, Julian, etc did? How do you right the past? Can you?

Nadia’s route asks: Who is the MC? The MC has no past. Are they the Fool only? Are they actually the same person they were? How can they tell? Who are they, really? Are they an imposter? No one can answer these questions for them.

Julian’s route asks: Who will the MC become? How does the MC see their future? Is there anything worth fighting for for that future? What will become of them and their loved ones? 

Now, if you notice, these themes are expertly woven throughout the primaries. Asra’s past dominates his route, Nadia is also missing memories and trying to construct her identity both with her family and with Vesuvia, and Julian’s fear of the future drives his flailing for control. Asra has to learn to take a broader view of his actions to get his Upright Ending, Nadia has to learn to trust herself and those around her for hers, and Julian has to learn how to let go for his. These lessons are the issues their cards stand for. The primaries are so dang elegant and delicate in their handlings of theme it is honestly awe-inspiring.

Thematically, the secondary routes have completely lost their hearts. First of all, the MC does not have strong, core questions which need to be answered. They just don’t. I suppose the writers did not want to retread old territory (which is weird considering how tightly bound the primaries are; it really tricks you into thinking you’re living the same events but from different angles depending on your route) but they did not replace the old with anything new. Muriel’s route is, on the surface, about discovering and owning his past, the good and the bad. Why not tie MC’s self-discovery to that story? Or they could have taken the angle that Muriel’s route is about convincing him to be present and active in the world while MC builds an identity for themself outside of Asra, the shop, and the memories they cannot retrieve. Why not tie the investigation themes running through Portia’s early route back to MC and their past? Portia has the unique angle of being as in the dark as MC about all of this, why not discover the past together? And for goodness’ sake, Lucio has no future when his route begins, why not tie that to his need for growth, responsibility, and MC’s own future between the Fool, the Devil, or something mortal and in between?

Secondly, the routes lost their tarot backbone. We have a primer on how to get specific endings for each LI and it still holds, but the writers did not follow through on the thematic coherence of each secondary. The Hermit is looking for something, be it perspective, insight, a solution to a problem, whatever. The key here is that the Hermit must find or learn what they are searching for, this thing must change their understanding of the world, and finally, they must bring this lesson back to the world from which they retreated. Can someone please enlighten me as what exactly Muriel learns then teaches the world around him? Nothing Muriel learns from Morga, MC, or even the Hermit ties back into anything. The Devil warns that you are out of control and exerting a lot of manipulative, destructive behavior on the world around you. It asks you to take responsibility for yourself and your actions. So can someone tell me why Lucio’s route actively avoids any interaction or reflection on two of Lucio’s biggest victims: Muriel and Julian? Why does the route only try to make amends with the “easier” of his victims in the cast? The Star is first and foremost the card of clarity, the light at the end of the tunnel. Perseverance, if you will. Yet Portia’s route has been the muddiest of the trio; the writers drop the investigation aspect of her route in favor just handing her and MC information they could have easily found and muddying the waters with Tasya (she blows up the palace but it’s all okay bc she has a secret daughter Julian never thought to bring up or mention) and the complete removal of the Devil as antagonist. 

So that leaves just the Fool’s Journey trying to hold this stool up with only one leg. And well...it doesn’t go well. At best, the secondary route books pay the barest surface level homage to the themes of the individual cards. At worst, they ignore the cards completely. Muriel's Moon book has nothing to do with illusions or delusions or lies or even an Alice in the Looking Glass upside down world. Portia's back half is a complete and utter mess, starting with her Temperance book being so badly mangled that Muriel's aftermath book does it better. Lucio's route too bungles the Tower and the Star. There just isn't enough here to carry the routes alone.

Add to the core loss the loss of intertextuality. The primary routes are very good, even great but they too do have their moments and mistakes. What helps strengthen them when the cores stumble is how the trio is woven together. Things you learn in Asra's route can inform the way you play Nadia's, for example. Julian's route informs what is going on in Asra's route and slots some missing puzzle pieces together. Nadia's route tells you of the power struggles she is facing and informs the other two routes' handling of Julian and his trial. On and on, the three routes support each other because they are built out of the same basic plot beats, just tackled in very different ways. Now, the writers are allowed to try and write whatever they want. They apparently wanted to be more experimental and less tied down to an overarching plot with the three secondaries. Okay, fine, they are allowed to do that. The problem is that they sacrificed one of the key strengths of the primary trio and didn't replace said strength with anything else. They also, on some level, harmed the very premise of the game, which is that only the player's choices and route selected change the overall plot. Instead of feeling like legitimate possibilities or offshoots of the same timeline/plot, the secondaries feel almost like Arcana AUs. The secondaries throw out all relations to the primaries and each other as quickly as possible and for what? 

It is probably the height of arrogance to suggest fixes for works whose behind the scenes I do not know. At the same time, some small, obvious changes could have salvaged Muriel and maybe Lucio's endings (rip Portia). Instead of having the Hermit appear as a disappointing cameo, why not have him say something cryptic to Muriel, then have MC start trying to seal the Devil. Then let Muriel use his forget me mark to cloak MC and hide them from the Devil's attacks. Protecting MC by hiding them from Lucio, keeping him focused on Muriel, seems to me a simple third solution between Muriel's desire to run and his desire to never fight again. It lets him stand up to Lucio and let him have it while holding onto who Muriel has become. The Reversed End would have MC try to draw Lucio's attention at some point, disrupting the sealing, and eventually leading to Muriel killing the Devil. With Lucio's Upright End, I just have to ask: why doesn't MC fully claim the power of the Fool instead of the Devil? We don't need the other Arcana involved in this fight; we have three routes that demonstrate that. Just have MC pull Scout into the conflict, then have Lucio tell MC he believes in them, then add his power to the mix. You got yourself a full Fool who leaves Scout guarding the realm until they and Lucio's mortal bodies fail and they return to the realm to be together forever. Boom, you're done, you can even add some ambiguous lines so that players can decide how happy their MC is with this arrangement, send me the check.

Here is the bottom line. Our group is full of aroace, and several combinations therein, individuals. We are the last group who should have gotten into a dating sim of all things. But the Arcana did something with the primaries that was special; they wrote a compelling plot with dazzling lore, complex characters, and strong themes wrapped up in a dating sim bow. The writers know better and we know they know better. I do not know what happened with the secondaries, especially around books 10-11, which is where minor issues slowly start spiraling into major ones, but it is clear that Nix Hydra needed some more planning before they released these routes. Hopefully they will learn.

TL;DR: Nix Hydra fired their tarot consultants about eighteen months ago and it has wrecked their secondary routes until they were just embarrassments. They never intended for the secondary routes to even exist and once they had to make them, they scrambled and threw out everything that made the primaries work.

- Mod Telos

[in-tua-deep]

Ok I totally want to hear more about this survivors au/Delores is real! How do the siblings handle having this different version of Five? Five may be better adjusted but he still has to heard his family around like a bunch of stray cats. What happens when Hazel and Cha Cha show up? How do they find out that Vanya causes the apocalypse and how does Five handle that revelation?!

here is the thing, i think the survivors au has the potential to be HILARIOUS

no one knows how to handle a well-adjusted five, and this absolutely includes the commission

So you mentioned Hazel and Cha-Cha?? Five in this au was not nearly as absolutely feral as he is in the show bc he knows how to interact with people - he was raised by a competent adult and a weird best friend and they occasionally saw other survivors as well

please picture old Five hanging around the water cooler and chatting with Hazel

the other funny thing is that Five is competent passing - he is well adjusted emotionally but functionally?? Hazel is out there complaining about dental being cut and office parties and budgets and Five is there sipping his drink having never filed taxes in his life. Five doesn't know what the fuck a dental plan is, he was a child soldier and then lived in an apocalypse.

So please picture for me Hazel being like "okay I know corporate wants us to keep what we're being paid to ourselves but fuck that, workers unite, what do you get paid as a legend old timer?"

and five is like "you're getting paid? i get to not get tossed back into the apocalypse, I think"

"but what about expense forms? what about medical care?"

"I'm like 80% sure i'm being experimented on, actually." Five says nonchalantly, "Don't get me wrong, my idea of medical care is fucked by being a child soldier but I'm pretty sure regular people don't have electrodes attached to their heads every time they get a checkup. Could be wrong though! My ex-dad used to monitor my brainwaves while I slept so like, my idea of appropriate shit is fucked, you know?"

This is a Five who was raised by Rick, he is polite to his coworkers. If Dot asked him if he wanted to grab lunch, Five would have gone and grabbed lunch with her or politely said that he couldn't.

Cha Cha only ever talks to Five when she wants to talk shop, so they've had a couple of conversations about weapons but not much else tbh, Hazel just tends to be more personable

So when they're sent after Five, Hazel is much more hesitant to kill who he perceives as a "work friend" and also is definitely thinking about all the times Five casually revealed a way the commission was being highkey shady about him, such as the potential experimentation, no pay, working under duress etc. He's much more easily turned against the commission because he's even more primed to say "fuck the commission" than he is in canon

Hazel out here like "how did Five break his contract when Five wasn't even being paid? I kind of want to read it."

Hazel out here like "I would unionize if I didn't think the commission was anti-union enough to send literal assassins after me if I suggested it :/"

meanwhile with the siblings

Five just. talks over them a lot and makes so much sense that it's actually really hard to argue with him, and he's weirdly considerate of his family's obligations

Like Diego is like "i have to go see Patch" then Five is like "that's great I'm proud of you buddy, it would actually be really handy to have some law enforcement read into the situation if you think she's up to the task. that goes for everyone by the way! If y'all have people you trust, more bodies would be super helpful I think"

the entire family, collectively, who have like zero trusted social links: uhhhhhhhh

Diego, with this weird permission, probably?? Does? Awkwardly attempt to read Patch into the situation? Patch is, obviously, like "what the fuck, Diego" but probably goes with him to the mansion (????????) because she's concerned and then meets his fucking whacko family with their superpowers and suddenly everything is 100% more realistic

Five is just like "yes hello I'm aware I look like a child, i'm actually in my late 50s or early 60s (apocalypse time amiright) because of time travel stuff. Yes I am Five Hargreeves who went missing in like 2002 or whatever. anyway it's lovely to meet you, i'm so glad diego has someone he trusts, and considering my sibling's shifty looks when i told them to invite anyone they trusted this genuinely makes me concerned that Diego is the most socially well-adjusted of them."

"That cannot be possible." Patch says, like someone who has met Diego Hargreeves.

"You haven't met the rest." Five says sympathetically, "In our defense we were raised in isolation as child soldiers."

"That... explains so much." Is all Patch can say to that, "But you seem..."

"I'm adopted." Five waves away.

"We're ALL adopted." Diego grits out, very aggrieved by this and also not sure if he likes the fact that Patch seems friendly with Five, or at least is listening to him?

"I'm double adopted."

However! With the recruitment of Patch, herding Diego becomes like 90% easier.

Honestly the worst to herd are probably Luther and Allison? Luther because he's Number One and resents Five taking charge and also resents Five's casual dismissal of Reginald and also suspects that Five (or at least the commission) has something to do with Reginald's death?

Allison because she is torn between following Luther and helping him and helping Five but also calling Patrick and Claire at every possible moment while ALSO trying to repair her relationship with Vanya. She's flighty - she'd bail on a Five-apocalypse-assignment if Vanya mentioned being hungry or if Luther called or anything like that

Vanya likes to be included and, if asked, would probably drop as many current obligations as she can. Like she would probably cancel her teaching if Five genuinely and sincerely asked her for her help, which he does because he's 100% sure Dolores would manifest in front of him and smack him if he dared even imply someone without powers wouldn't be helpful

Vanya is like "I'm not sure if i'll be helpful - I don't have powers ):" and Patch is like "wtf are you talking about - my superpowers are Gun, Backup, and Reading Comprehension and i am like the most useful member of this team right now"

Vanya gets a confidence boost just from hanging out with Patch honestly, I think they should be friends

Klaus is thrilled to be included are you kidding?? He says he does it for money but he's just happy to be there and also as one of the most emotionally intelligent siblings he is mildly concerned about the fact that Five looks like he's about to cry and also emotes

Five also gives Klaus positive reinforcement, hugs, and Five absolutely weaponizes the I'm not mad, but I believe that you can do better and I'm going to give you more chances because I love you and fully believe that next time you'll be amazing way that Rick used on him.

I feel like Five ends up saying something along the lines of "I understand that x is really important, and we're definitely going to look into it. Is it something that needs to be addressed right now, or is it something that can wait until after April 1st? If it can wait, I can write it down here on this list so we don't forget. If it can't wait then we can figure out a time to address it and help you" a lot

Like Grace malfunctioning and potentially killing Reginald?

"We don't have to make this decision right now." Five says patiently, "Because Grace is a robot, we have some options. Living with a robot who is potentially malfunctioning and homicidal is dangerous, but Luther saying that means admitting that Reginald might have made a mistake or error with Grace's programming or upkeep. I haven't been here for a long time, but I remember Reginald being very precise. Regardless, this isn't a choice between permanently shutting her off or not. We can shut her down temporarily until we can fully address the issue. We can ask and see if there is a 'system reboot' option or some sort of system check that Grace can undergo. We can try find and hire an expert to take a look at her programming to find the issue."

Five gives this speech while like, organizing the weaponry in the house on a table very nonchalantly

Five out here making buzzer noises at his siblings arguments like "yeah no that's a false dichotomy and a strawman's argument, want to try again?"

(Look apocalypse nights were long and they had games that were literally about arguing pointless shit like ranking types of chairs or the best way to break out of a prison without powers and things could get heated)

"Who died and made you boss?" Luther demands.

"Uh, the world? Were you not listening?" Five asks, looking very purposefully confused.

It gets even MORE delightful when Five reads Rick into the situation because a) he promised and b) his siblings really have like, no connections jeeze

Rick fully believes that this is his son from the future, like Five introduced himself, but Five skipped out on a few key details. Such as being adopted.

So Rick spends a solid chunk of time just staring at Five, who looks basically nothing like him, trying to think like, who is his mother ???? if we save the world will Five stop existing? why would I name my child 'Five'? Does everyone have powers in the future? was there like... a radioactive apocalypse? would radiation give future humans superpowers? when did my life turn into a comic book? am i even allowed to ask these questions? will knowledge of the future fuck things up?

and then when Five comes back and is like "what is up everyone this is my dad Rick who will be joining us, he doesn't have any memories of me thanks to time travel but if anyone is mean to him i WILL kneecap them"

"Your DAD?"

Five does kidney punch Klaus for saying that Rick is a DILF but otherwise everyone just is like, warily looking at this Normal Dad Man in confusion because?? This is the dude who raised Five, who they watched take out like an entire commission team by himself yesterday? He looks so. Normal.

Rick is very confused and like, wonders if he's supposed to be the team mascot? But Five keeps involving him and asking his opinion and in return Rick enforces snack breaks and makes everyone sandwiches and has gentle talks with everyone

Every time Five notices someone about to blow he just lovingly makes sure that that person is alone in a room with Rick

Luther ends up crying on the sofa with Rick gently patting his back as Rick calmly states that Luther seems like he's put a lot of time and effort into his family and making his father proud and that since Reginald isn't here to say it, Rick will have to be the one to say that he's proud and that they've been dropped into a difficult and stressful situation - so soon after Reginald's death when they're still grieving! - and he's doing so well

Luther, experiencing unconditional positive paternal regard for the first time in his life: i don't know why i'm crying so much

honestly this is just a comedy of juggling the gang, having impromptu therapy sessions and discussions, investigating the apocalypse and the eye, leonard trying to meet vanya continuously and failing because she's constantly surrounding by family or rick/patch, the commission trying their best to bust up the dream team/isolate Vanya/kill or remove Five, while Hazel lives out his romcom dreams with Agnes and also says "fuck the commission"

[writing-freak]

Softly Soaring hcs

(GIF credit to its owner :)) )

Todoroki Shouto x Reader

Request: @greywarenns

greywarenns asked:Hi! I discovered your blog recently and I absolutely loved the "facts of the universe" hcs you did with bakugo x reader who is his childhood best friend and crush! Is it alright if I ask for hcs like that with todoroki please?👉👈 I totally understand if you don't feel like writing it bc you don't want it to be repetitive! whether you decide to write this request or not, thank you so much!💕

A/N: umm ok so I went like way overboard, but this was also so fun so I couldn’t help myself hehe. this is my first time writing for todoroki ahhh but it was so fun and I hope it’s alright?? thanks for the request, and thanks everyone for reading! stay safe, have a great day! 500 follower celebration coming next!!

so I’ve been obsessed with this song lately, and ended up sorta basing this on it cause I can’t get it out of my head, I would totally recommend listening, but it’s not 100% necessary to the story :)

The song is Soul Meets Body by Death Cab for Cutie

also i have a hand holding kink

Warnings: slight mention of Todoroki’s trauma, but mostly pure fluff

Masterlist

Todoroki Shouto

being todoroki’s best friend came with its fair share of difficulties

especially since you had known him since you were in diapers, and had been a part of every rocky event that shaped the course of his complicated familial relationships, his dealings with trauma, and the stubbornness and emotional instability that came with being a teenager

sometimes you wondered how your friendship lasted so long, but then you spent just a moment around the boy, and you fell back into the comfortable rhythm you shared

for you, todoroki was home

he was playing on the playground, falling asleep way past your bedtime beneath the starlights decorating your ceiling

for him, you were what it felt like to be understood, especially when his stoic demeanor and “blank” face led him to be considered the “dark and mysterious” resident bad boy, who was more likely to be admired and avoided rather than considered a real person with very real feelings

you could see past the stoic expressions in a heartbeat, and knew where to draw the line between a bad day at school and nearing a mental breakdown with memories from his past flooding his senses

you saw the moment his eyes withdrew, the moment he slipped out of the world around him and into one he’s constructed in his mind out of walls and barricades to keep everyone else out

you were the only one allowed a key to the door of that world, and only because you’d spent years constructing it yourself

you had become so reliant on each other in so many ways, but at this point, it barely registered

you shared a world, an atmosphere, a universe

you shared blankets, clothes, and dorm rooms too

half of your friendship is simply being there, because you’ve gone on so long you’re fully comfortable sitting in silence on the floor of his dorm room all afternoon, reading to yourself while he does his homework

you’ve snuck yourself out of his dorm after accidentally dozing off too many mornings to count

the rest of class 1-a is convinced you’re dating, or at least...you know....

todoroki can’t make fun of you, though, because we all know he’s falling asleep on your shoulder at every occasion you have a moment’s break

we also know he’s doing it when you’re busy too, cause this boi can sleep through anything

you share music the most, because you love lying next to him, your heads barely touching, as you share a world beyond your own, forced to think and feel the same as the musicians mold your mind and soul

so it’s not surprising at all to todoroki when you’re pounding on his door frantically at 1 am, your phone clutched in your hand as you shove an earbud in his face

he blinks the sleep out of his eyes as you invite yourself in, dragging him to sit beside you on his bed

“listen to this song,” you say, completely serious, with wide, intense eyes as you hold the earbud out to him, more gently this time

“o-okay,” he says, confused but not surprised 

you close your eyes as the song you spent the whole night falling in love with begins to play in your ear

I want to live, where soul meets body, and let the sun wrap its arms around me

as the song softly finishes, a melody softly soaring through my atmosphere, you open your eyes slowly, tears staining your cheeks as you look expectantly at your friend

his eyes are closed, in what you initially thought was focus, or, as in your case, peace and emotional vulnerability

but when they didn’t open, even as you tugged your headphones back, you realized it was, in fact, in sleep

angry you just shared what you thought was an emotional moment with an unconscious idiot, you slapped the boy awake, pouting as he looked at you in accusation 

“you were supposed to be listening,” you said, fuming

todoroki at least has the decency to look sheepish, but he doesn’t apologize, instead opting for a “it’s after one in the morning”

if he thought looks could kill before…

instead of yelling (like you want to), you shove the earbud (a bit harshly) back in his ear as you cue the song again

this time, you leave your eyes open, locking onto todoroki’s with a glare

you play the song, and it softly begins again, and this time, you’re watching his eyes closely to see his reaction (and to be sure there is one at all)

And I do believe it’s true, that there are roads left in both of our shoes

But if the silence takes you then I hope it takes me too

you see something flash in his eyes at that line, though you’re not sure if it’s your own tears returning once more as the beautiful words wash over you for the millionth time tonight

So brown eyes I’ll hold you near, cause you’re the only song I want to hear

todoroki tilts his head just slightly to the side, and you’re suddenly bombarded with the memory of his soft locks tickling your temple as you stare up at the stars, tiny fingers interlocked like your mom taught you to do when crossing the street

cause everything with todoroki felt like that, like crossing the street, like following your own roads that always intersected, were one and the same

a melody softly soaring through my atmosphere

and as the musician’s voice pierced your eardrums, you were met with the sounds of a thousand artists before him, the sounds of countless nights listening with your best friend, the sound of his voice as he counted down the numbers before hide and seek, the melodic sound of his voice as he woke you early after a night spent crashing on his floor

a melody softly soaring through my atmosphere

you didn’t realize the song was over until todoroki touched your face, and you let out a breath you hadn’t known you had been holding in

there’s a teasing smile on his face, but something in his eyes tells you the words changed him like they changed you

“just checking to make sure you didn’t fall asleep,” he says, before letting out a yawn, and you’re suddenly jolted back into reality, where you sat, on your best friend’s bed, in the middle of the night, sharing music like you always did

you’re up in a second, pulling your headphones to yourself frantically, blushing up a storm as you realize just what you had been thinking

“I have to go,” you stammer, and you’re running out of there stumbling as tears of embarrassment threaten to spill from your eyes

you make it all the way back to your dorm before you cry real tears, confused and upset by the way your best friend was making you feel

but jokes on you if you think you’re going to get away with leaving like that

you know todoroki like the back of your hand, but he knows you just the same, and when you wake the next morning, you know avoiding him is out of the question

he finds you quickly in the halls of the dorms, and you just let out a sigh as you greet him

“I really liked that song,” he says softly, slow to start the conversation you know is coming

so you sigh again, and look away, sheepish, a feeling completely alien to you around your closest friend flooding your veins

“I spent all night listening to that song alone,” you say, wringing your hands together, “thinking about what it would feel like to feel that way about a person, to know someone who cleanses you and makes you whole and makes your soul a part of you again”

“and then I heard it again while I was looking at your eyes, and I realized I already had that”

“it just scared me, that’s all, cause I’d never looked at you that way before”

he was silent through your confession, and you were terrified to look at him, knowing you’d know the second you saw him what he was thinking, and afraid you wouldn’t like what it was

“shou?” you finally ask, your voice breaking as you chance a glance in his direction

but you find his eyes gazing at you softly, a look you recognize as understanding on his face

he reaches for you, and you let him pull you in, your fingers intertwining as you’re brought in close

his free hand cups your cheek, and you lean into him, your lips brushing as you finally embrace

it’s like a sigh, a finally, and you feel like you’re breathing in air after being underwater for so long

you part so soon, and your foreheads are resting on one another, the familiar feeling of his soft hair tickling your skin making you giggle softly

you squeeze his hand, your eyes fluttering open until you’re gazing into his eyes, your noses brushing affectionately

a melody softly soaring through my atmosphere

Taglist: @anything-and-everything-here69​ @crystal-lilac​

[national-nobody-writes]

2020 Creator Wrap

2020 Creator Wrap: Favorite Works

I was tagged by the oh so talented @irolltwenties!

Rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (or so) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought to the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

I’m not a particularly prolific writer (WIPs for days, but completed projects? Not so much). Somehow in this hell year though, I did manage to complete more fics than in any previous year for a total of seven new works (~49k words, all on ao3), plus a chunky chap of a long running WIP (~20k words) so I’m actually pretty damn proud of myself! I also made some new fandom friends in 2020 which has easily been one of the biggest delights of the year & has definitely helped my creative momentum, so ty all for that. <3

Counting down from 5, here are my favs:

5. Downtime

I have endless love for JayRoy and it felt so good to finally finish something for them for once this year! All of my past WIPs primarily focused on them ended up firmly in my graveyard folder, including the fic that this one shot was originally meant to be connected to. I liked the way this turned out well enough to clean it up and post it on its own though, so at least now I can say that I have something published for them at last.

(Also it got me back into the JayRoy headspace enough to outline a whole YJ/Earth16 JayRoy fic that I’m excited to start drafting in 2021, so we’ll see where that goes...)

2.3k NSFW; A mix of playful sweet and roughness, just like them.

4. Mirror Image

Bluepulse Week really saved me this year in terms of forcing me to just write, damn it! Did I finish all the prompts this year? Nope. Did it get me to complete a handful of fics that I ended up really loving? Yes. This was one of them.

This fic zoomed into existence entirely out of necessity as an alt idea to a prompt that I had a much longer idea for, but didn’t have time to complete. It then got a positive enough reception that I decided to turn it from a crack-adjacent, passable one-shot to a slightly more developed two-shot by request of one of my commenters. Really, it was writing that second chapter that ended up endearing the fic to me.

6.3k Humor, time travel shenanigans & accidental dating. This fic is the sweetness of teenage crushes, the confusing mess of discovering your sexuality, & laughter with your best friend.

3. Soft Wesper One Shots

Would you look at that, another nsfw piece. Could it be that I’m starting to get to the point where I can look back at completed nsfw fics without cringing terribly? Love that for me.

This fic took me by surprise, tbh. I wouldn’t consider myself a part of the grisaverse fandom (I’m utterly ambivalent toward the OG trilogy & have no plans to read them), but I did fall deeply in love with the whole Six of Crows gang earlier this year to the point of having quite the book hangover afterward, unable to pick up anything else except related fanfic for a couple weeks straight. These fluffy, nsfw scenes were born out of that, and I was pleasantly surprised to see such a positive response to them in the comments. The whole SoC gang has my heart, but the dynamic between Jesper and Wylan in particular got my writing fingers itching.

3.7k Domestic, post-canon fluff & tender sex with flirty Jesper & blushing Wylan abound.

2. Stick With Me

Ohh, I still get warm fuzzies thinking about this fic! If I’m only low-key proud of the first three on this list, this is one I’m legitimately very proud of. I had this idea on the docket already from a convo with @ivyxwrites early this year (or maybe last year? who knows, time means nothing anymore) but used Bluepulse Week as the excuse to finally get started, and I ended up adoring the process of writing it far more than I anticipated.

As much as I love planning out meticulously crafted, plotty stories, sometimes all you want to do is pick some well-loved tropes out of a hat instead and run with them (in this case: stuck in a cabin, only one bed, & heated argument leading to confession). It was freeing to just mess around and have fun with this fic, knowing pretty much right from the get-go how I wanted it to unfold and seeing it so vividly in my mind. It also probably helped that I was writing it for Ivy; it’s much easier for me to stay motivated when creating directly for my friends.

Finishing this was also such a serotonin-filled burst of pure victory for me since, as previously stated, I’m terrible at finishing projects--particularly multi-chap fics, particularly within a decent timeframe.

25.5k A showcase of the essence of what I love about the best friends-to-lovers dynamic. Part character study, part wires getting crossed & uncrossed, and whole idiots to lovers. This fic is the warmth in the pit of your stomach from a yearning made real & the sudden clarity of realizing what you were looking for had already been there all along.

1. The Rest Pt 1: Delicate (Remember Me Chap 4)

Oh, Remember Me. Of everything I’ve ever written, this story remains the one I’m most proud of and certainly the closest to my heart (not to mention the longest running, whoops). The first iteration of the beginning of this story was actually drafted back in 2017, but I walked away from it for a couple of years before deciding to dust it off and try again. It has spiraled into something far bigger in scope than I originally planned for, but I’ve come to love the path it’s led me down so far, and finishing this whopping 20k chunkster of a chapter was like breathing a huge (if temporary) sigh of relief.

This chap was particularly cathartic to write because it allowed for a number of convos between the boys that had really needed to happen, and was finally the ‘getting together’ moment the fic had been building toward for a while. It’s also so sappy I could die, but I will not be apologizing for that, lol. I was really hoping to get Chap 5 up this year as well, but y’know. Sometimes things just don’t work out like you plan for and that’s okay. 

Chap 5 does have 17k done already (with prob another 5-8k still to go) & I’m itching to share it, but no sense in rushing if the end result would suffer for it. Luckily, everyone in comments has been kind enough to beat me over the head with ‘take your time, we don’t mind/we’ll still be here!!!’ which I’m immensely grateful for. So, at least the pressure to hurry up and get it done is purely self-inflicted.

Of all my works, this fic has not only gotten the most passionate responses, but has also been the main gateway for me to interact with other bluepulse creators, which has been a real joy. Nothing brightens my day like the essays people leave me over there from time to time after discovering the fic. That kind of engagement is the highest praise, & responding is very self indulgent fun for me (bc, clearly, I could go on and on about this fic & YJ in general forever).

54.8k total so far (WIP). Bart & Jaime’s relationship journey from beginning to ‘current day’ (aka the moment the fic begins), using amnesia/memory restoration as a framing device. The high highs and low lows of first love, navigating a 3 yr age difference, and the long, winding road from best friends to lovers as the years roll on. Slow-burn-adjacent (in terms of both the boys’ relationship to each other and reader’s relationship to the fic bc of how long I take between goddamn updates).

Tagging @ivyxwrites, @incorrectbatfam, @paintingwithdarkness, @bluepulsebluepulse

[rockthingsbymeg]

i wish you would write a fic based on def leppard’s song “have you ever needed someone so bad” where modern day slash and the reader have an age gap and they want to be in a relationship but they know they can’t be because of their age difference so it’s just a lot of longing and slight angst because they wanna be together so bad but they know they can’t 🥺

Ohh I'm a sucker for a good longing every now and then... hope I made this justice dear💛

- Slash met Y/N when Velvet Revolver got in the studio to record the Contraband

- his life was looking up once again, with new music on the horizon, with a group that truly wanted to work and that he wanted to work with

- and that's when he met Y/N

- she was working in the studio with some older couple, probably her parents, and seemed to be just starting on the music industry

- she was absolutely breath-taking and the more they worked with her, since she was always around her father while they all worked on the album, the more Slash began to realize he felt more than a physical attraction towards her

- on the other side of the coin, Y/N felt the exact same way

- Slash was such a chill, sweet and amazing guy and he was absolutely gorgeous. She had fallen in love with his music early in her life, but now she was also falling in love with him

- one night, after almost all the tracks in the album were done, Slash was the last one in the studio, playing around his guitar until he had perfected the riff he was currently working on. Y/N had come back, realizing she had forgotten her jacket with her keys and cigarettes inside, and found him working

- the moment they were alone in the same room it was like something could be felt in the air. It was not sexual tension (mostly, bc that was there too) but rather... a deep desire

- she picked her jacket up with a soft smile while looking at Slash, and he gently grabbed her hand and stopped her

- the months of glances and lingering touches had left then hungry for more, and almost on instinct, they both acted on it

- Slash got up from the couch he was on and at the same time, he and Y/N leaned closer, leaving between then a very small gap

- "we shouldn't do this..." "I know... but I want you..." a soft sigh "so do I, you got no idea how..." a gentle tilt of the head and a smooth brush of noses, a single finger tucking hair behind a ear

- then they heard noise in the hallway. The band was back after leaving to get some food...

- Y/N and Slash pulled apart and she smiled sadly, putting her jacket on and walking out of the room, waving goodbye to the guys and making her way out of the studio

- Slash was off the rest of the night, but at least he came up with a solo. One of the saddest ones he had composed so far for the album, but a solo none the less

- contact between them became less and less as time went by. They knew they would give in if given the chance

- Slash told himself everyday that he did not need the drama of dating such a young girl so late in his life. There were women his age out there, and one of them would fit him and they would love each other. The same way he loved Y/N...

- Y/N told herself everyday that her life would be so much easier if she found someone her age to date. Someone who'd have the same goals, the same needs, the same mentality as hers... not someone much older than her, that probably wanted something different out of life at this point...

- they'd be the thought on each other's mind 24/7. First thing in the morning, last thing before bed

- unfortunately, that's all they'd ever be to each other. A thought... a memory of a life they could not live together...

------

Thank you for requesting my dear💛

Finishing off the I wish you would write for a fic...

[visionsofus]

For your songfic, may I suggest Heart of Stone (Six)? Not all the lyrics are applicable, bc neither Wanda or Vision are Henry VIII (thank god lol), but the steadfast and enduring love and devotion that drives the song seems especially pertinent given that finale 😭. Or Simply the Best by Tina Turner? ❤️

hey anon! thank you so much for your requests ❤️

I’ve finished The Best by Tina Turner but I’m still working on the Heart of Stone prompt (please bear with me while I tear my heart out and put it back together because I wanna do the prompt justice) 

please enjoy!

wanda and vision’s mixtape | read this part on AO3 

synopsis: In which Wanda searches Edinburgh for Vision after she arrives late at their safehouse. When she discovers his energy signature floating around the city, she decides to follow the threads to their source. Along the journey she recalls the complications of their long-distance, secretive relationship but by the end recalls exactly why they sacrifice so much to be together.

Wanda was frantic as she hurried out of the airport. She’d been anticipating this trip for a month, her heart set on the two weeks Vision had managed to buy away from the compound. She’d planned out all the details to make sure she was on the right flight, that her fake passport was in order and that Nat was aware of her location if something went terribly wrong. Even her status as a fugitive was relatively under control thanks to some false information she’d planted over in Ohio last month. She’d left behind a trail of misleading clues that the Secretary of State and his team were lapping up eagerly, thinking they were getting closer to her capture for the first time in eighteen months.

Instead, here Wanda was halfway across the world having just landed at Edinburgh airport.

No matter how much she had planned things out, no matter the scope of her powers, nothing could have stopped the wave of snowfall that the UK had received in the last few days, coming to a head the previous night. She’d timed her flight to arrive, as they’d agreed, at 9pm at a predetermined destination in the city. To her dismay she’d found herself on a crowded red eye flight that had left 6 hours later when the runway had to be cleared of snow.

The worst part was that she’d had to sit there for those hours that dragged on for an eternity, knowing that at that very moment Vision would be waiting at the airbnb they’d rented out, alone. Wanda had no way to contact him, not with such short notice. Technology was too easy to track but it didn’t stop her longing to go and buy a cheap international sim from the technology stand at the airport and use it to just send one message. At this inclination Natasha’s voice had rung out in Wanda’s head, ‘the next time they catch you it’s as a war criminal, don’t give them a reason to decide you’re better off dead than locked up’.

  So it wasn’t worth the risk but it didn’t stop the sick feeling that grew in her stomach as she waited nervously to be let through passport control, then at the taxi stand and finally on the doorstep of the flat they had booked just off West Port.

It was early morning by the time she arrived, but the wintery sky was still hazy with the night’s darkness so she hoped that Vision might be waiting inside. The key box, which they’d been given a code to open from the host, was empty which further confirmed this conclusion. She rang the doorbell twice and waited. And waited and waited some more. There was no answer.

Wanda looked at the houses around her, streetlights reflecting their orange glows off of second story windowpanes. There were few lights on inside at this time of morning, but she still needed to be careful.

Leaving her only piece of luggage, a small carry-on bag that held the bare essentials of what she kept with her at all times these days, she looked up to the windows above her. Perhaps one of them would be open.

Wanda took a deep breath and let her power grow in her palms, red mist arcing out to push her from the ground. Her ascent was controlled and slow and she reached the windowsill with ease. It was just wide enough for her to grasp the waterpipe next to it and rest her feet on the sill. She froze when a light switched on next door and what sounded like a radio began to play, rather loudly considering the time of day. She used the music (it sounded like Tina Turner but she couldn’t be certain) to hide the distinct click that sounded from the window as she forced the lock open with her powers. Inside was quiet, all the lights were off, and Vision was not there.

“Vis?” Wanda called out nonetheless.

If he wasn’t here were could he be? Their general rule of thumb was that if one of them couldn’t make it to the predetermined location they had to wait 24 hours given it was safe to do so. It stood to reason that he’d follow the protocol this time, particularly given how long they were due to spend in Edinburgh and the months it had taken to concoct a believable excuse for why Vision wasn’t going to be in America.

Wanda returned to the window quickly and looked out over the limited view it gave of Edinburgh city and the castle rising up behind, providing a somewhat medieval backdrop. She raised her fingers to her forehead and took in her surroundings, focusing on the sound of early morning commuters from the main street, the sound of a ticking clock at her back, a car door closing down the road, and beyond it all she felt for Vision. Wanda hadn’t used the telepathic dimension of her powers in a while, or at least not as much as she had used to. They were a little rusty, making it hard to pinpoint precisely where Vision was but, when she opened her eyes something similar to an energy field could be seen gracing the cityscape before her. Certain structures stood out to her, outlined in a golden haze that couldn’t be anything but the mind stone calling to her.

Without hesitating Wanda vaulted out the window and hit the pavement below, her powers softening the landing. A flick of her hand sent her bag flying up through the open window.

Wanda grinned in anticipation and set off in the direction of the nearest golden glow, her boots hitting the cobbled streets one after the other. It had been freezing when she landed but as she ran through the slowly waking streets of Edinburgh Wanda removed her scarf and let it trail behind her.

The sun had not yet crested the horizon, but its light was turning the sky a nice lilac colour highlighted by the grey expanses of cloud hanging over the city. She briefly wondered whether it might snow today or if it was going to be too cold.

As Wanda rounded the corner onto the main street she nearly lost her footing on a stretch of dangerous black ice on the pavement only just catching herself on a nearby bus bench. She’d reached the first place Vision’s energy signature was calling her to, a small café down a wynd bordered on both sides by the back walls of town houses. The interior of the store was dark but a soft light glowed at the back where Wanda assumed the bakers had started their morning preparing the delicate pastries the café was known for.  

Wanda walked up to the window and looked at the ground where a strong outline of gold was hovering just above the icy cobble stones. Vision had been here recently, but he hadn’t gone inside, he’d just stood in the exact space she now hesitated at. They hadn’t had plans to meet here but it was a place they frequented any time they met up this side of the world.

Beyond the dark glass a few inches from her nose Wanda could see the cozy window seat that had become their spot. The café opened early and closed late at night so the pair had become frequent patrons what with Wanda sometimes kept up by recurring nightmares from her childhood and Vision who refused to let her be alone in those darkest hours.

Wanda’s fingertips brushed against the cold glass, leaving little prints in their wake at the tenderness of those memories, of her leaning against Vision, her hands clutching a warm cup while his arms encircled her waist. They’d sit there until the late hours when the store finally closed often talking about the other patrons in hushed tones. The students nursing late night coffees as they sat before computers, the lonely ones in new cities come to reclaim some control over the evening hours and, like them, the other insomniacs all drawn to the same place in this historic city. The conversation inevitably turned to their future and Wanda enjoyed thinking up ridiculous scenarios where they had a house in suburbia and didn’t have to run from anyone anymore. Things stayed lighthearted until they both grew too invested in the imaginary life they were discussing and returned back to wherever they were staying.

Wanda looked skywards again in the lightening morning and caught site of threads of gold leading her further down the street.

A mere block away was the only bookstore that stayed open 24 hours in the city. Some nights when the café had closed for the evening they had come here. The bell jangled, sharp in the serene silence of the store, as Wanda entered the maze-like stacks. Her fingers tingled in response to the energy signature that Vision had left here and she followed it to the back of the store which housed a few comfy armchairs and a long couch that they’d often set themselves up in for the night.

She could see it now as Vision’s energy shifted around her, as though it was responding to her presence. Could see him sitting across from her in her minds eye, a memory tucked away for safe keeping of when they’d last been in Edinburgh. He’d sat reading a book of poetry that he’d found amongst the stacks, his hands running gently across worn pages as he took in each word. She’d been perched at the other end of the couch, legs tucked beneath her and a sketch book resting on her knees as her pencil arced across the page creating the basis of his form, the curve of his shoulders, bend of his elbow, his legs crossed at the heal as he relaxed. Every now and then he’d glance up and she’d tilt the sketch away form his watchful eyes with a smile, or he’d take the moment to read out a particularly beautiful piece of poetry from the collection he was perusing.

Wanda had picked up drawing in the aftermath of the events in Sokovia and had been encouraged by Steve and Nat who had acted as her caretakers in those first few weeks after arriving in America. It had started as a simple activity to quiet her mind and draw what was happening within her, the first drawings hadn’t been good in skill or message, they’d started out dark. Vision didn’t know it, but she’d been drawing him for years, fascinated by trying to capture the feeling in his eyes or the gentle grace of his movement. Most of all this act of creation served to remind her that her hands could create beautiful things too, it didn’t all have to be death and destruction.

Wanda started as the energy rolled around her ankles before arcing back to the door. So, he wasn’t here either.

Out on the street gold threads guided her further up towards Edinburgh castle, the energy was growing stronger, and Wanda ran faster no longer just concerned about where Vision was but whether he was worried by her absence.

A small thread of energy darted off to the side and was so imperceptible that Wanda almost missed it. It was so weak that she knew there was no chance he’d be there but nonetheless she slowed down to a stop in front of a small newspaper stand that was being set up for the day. It was one of those metal domes that folded out to reveal the magazines and papers within. The elderly gentleman behind the counter gave her a warm smile as Wanda turned to the magazines, the cogs in her brain turning.

Of course he’d tried to stop here. Before they had brought Natasha into the picture, Wanda had communicated with Vision through the missed connections pages of local newspapers and gossip magazines. They’d leave each other a note, usually encoded so only they would understand it, detailing a time and place for their next meeting or what magazine they were going to put their next message in. In hindsight Wanda smiled at the memory but at the time she had been something of a mess. She’d come to rely on Vision for so much in the year they had spent living together, their first home. Being torn away from each other the way they were had been difficult, and the challenge of meeting each other in safe places for both of them had weighed down their evolving relationship. She wondered what might have happened if they’d been given the time they needed.

The owner of the stand was twirling the dial of a small radio moving from static to static until he found the radio station he wanted. To Wanda’s surprise, it was Tina Turner once more:

Each time you leave me I start losing control.

You’re walking away with my heart and my soul.

Wanda realised she was wasting time and hurriedly thanked the man before turning on her heel and starting down the street again. From here the incline grew but she hung onto the knowledge that when she eventually reached the thread’s end, Vision would be there waiting for her. Another lyric from Tina Turner’s song fluttered around her head as her chest burned from the running.

I can feel you even when I’m alone.

It was true that she always carried him with her when they were apart, but it was never the same as being with him in person. Nothing could beat that.

Wanda hadn’t realised but, whether from the intensity of the moment, or the cold, little tears had started to trickle down her face, blow away by the brisk wind.

The energy was growing stronger.

In your heart I see the star of every night and every day.

She ran faster, leaping up some steps two at a time and spinning around the corner.

In your eyes I get lost.

The gates to the public entrance to the castle tour were yet to open but Wanda wasn’t about to let a bit of steel stop her from getting to where Vision was. She did a quick 360 to make sure that she was alone before pushing off the ground with her feet and a jolt of power. She was up on the nearest rooftop and past the entrance in moments. Running around corners and up steps she felt like the threads were pulling her up towards him. She finally reached the top section of the castle – the battlements.

Just as long as I’m here in your arms

That was when she caught sight of him, the energy grew stronger until it was so bright, she might as well have been looking at the sun. For one horrifying moment as she waited for the light to clear she feared she had imagined it all. As fear seized her heart, she slowed down a bit, gasping a little at the exertion.

I could be in no better place

There he was, looking out over Edinburgh’s fading night lights in the early morning. He turned around in surprise, immediately glamouring his appearance before he caught sight of who was there.

“Wanda,” he whispered, the illusion dropping instantaneously as she stepped towards him.

“I’m sorry,” she said so quietly that she was worried he might not hear her, “my flight got cancelled.”

He reached her in a few large strides and wrapped his arms around her waist, squeezing her close to him. Wanda led out a shaky breath that was somewhere between a sigh of relief and a sob she’d been holding in since that morning. She buried her face in his shoulder relishing in having him here before her at last.

“I know, I know,” he whispered into her hair. “I figured you’d been held up with all the cancelled flights from Heathrow.”

They held each other for a few moments longer, swaying back and forth a little.

“How did you know where I was?” Vision asked pulling back a bit and brushing Wanda’s hair over her shoulder so he could cup her cheek, his eyes searching her face as though not quite believing that she was here, before him.

“I’d always find you,” Wanda said before laughing softly, “I can feel you even when I am alone.”

Vision tilted his head at the abrupt change in her tone, but Wanda couldn’t help it. It was impossible not to be happy as she stood there, atop Edinburgh castle in his arms halfway around the world from all of their problems.

“Well, I’m glad you found me.”

They stood there watching the sun rise, colouring the clouds in soft hues of lilac and lavender. Vision sighed in contentment, his chin resting on her shoulder from where he stood at her back, arms wrapped around her and holding him warmly to him. It wasn’t until sounds of the morning rush in the city below began to reach them that Wanda pulled away to look at him.

“I don’t suppose you’d mind if we spend the day in bed? I need to sleep off last night’s flight and recover a bit,”

“Of course not, my love,” he said raising her hand and kissing it. “You rest, I’ll pop out to get something for you for breakfast.”

Wanda sighed in happiness as they started to walk down the hill together. “I got lucky y’know.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I have my perfect synthezoid partner willing to go and get me breakfast in bed despite the fact that I basically stood him up.”

Vision chuckled, swinging their hands back and forth together. “Not quite what happened, but I suppose you could say I am simply the best,” he said nonchalantly waving a hand.

“You caught me! You should have told me you knew the song before I tried to use it as a romantic line,” Wanda mockingly scolded.

“I’ll always catch you,” Vision replied, pulling her closer as they emerged after the eventful night into the city welcoming them home together at last.  

[dawniebb]

Closure

So...back again with another marathon I’m hosting (?) with @healing-winston-pratt <3! about our canon divergence because canon is for the weak :) however, this time you’ll only see me so...yeah, guys, I’m sorry, bEAR WITH ME LMAO AFSGHJADFGSHJA :’)))

I thiiiiiink this is...the last marathon we’ll do about this I think, and it’s a series of four fics called “Closure” which is...basically, what the name says :’) it’s about people finding closure for the ones they lost throughout the books AND before the books this is about Georgia hello darling you’re wonderful im sorry mm killed you because we thought it was..necessary after that half-assed Supernova epilogue uwu. So yeah. The first one in this Closure series is Georgia :’)

You can use this post as a masterlist for backround bc we don’t have one yet

And the tag list (If you want to be addedOR removed just notifiy us pls): @novadreamer95438 @idkimbadwithusernamesandstuff @novas-tunnel-of-anxiety @obsidianfr3sk

ALSO I NAMED THESE AFTER SONGS :) So the link will be in the lyrics I hope

Georgia

I Kill Giants

Heavier heels His mourning concealed On the saddest of days Why couldn’t we save you?

A couple days after the supernova, once all the funerals had passed and things were going back to normal, Adrian went to visit his mom.

Georgia Rawles was buried inside a very ostentatious mausoleum, located in Gatlon’s cemetery.

Nobody had ever confirmed that, but rumor had it, it resembled the structure of Pops’ old house, by the edges of the city, close to the abandoned train rails; it had similar dimensions and structure, but the décor was a hundred times better, with white pillars, stairs that led to the entrance and a wooden gate with a carved R; at some point in time, all members of the Council would be there.

Right now, it was only Mom and Evander.

The mausoleum was always surrounded by gifts that people left there. And right now, since Gatlon was grieving Blacklight, the fence was open to the public.

Though…

Well…

Whether the fence was locked or not wouldn’t have mattered under normal circumstances because, obviously, Adrian had his own copy of the key, though he rarely went to see her. Not because he didn’t love her (he did. A lot. And he missed her every day despite having been torn from him when he was just a kid), but because…

Because he liked to remember her as what she had been, not for the fact she wasn’t here anymore; he liked to see her in family albums and draw her, but the mausoleum was a very…sad place for him, almost depressing.

It was also a place where he liked to be alone with Mom. And sometimes talk to her. After all, they lived in a world where people had powers; everything was possible. Which meant that, deep down, Adrian still had faith she would answer someday.

But she never answered.

Not really.

But it wasn’t like that made Adrian mad, because maybe she was too busy doing something else; maybe she was very comfortable…wherever she was. And that made him feel rather happy.

To know she was at peace.

So, slowly, Adrian walked up the stairs, and then opened the gate.

The smell of candles and flowers greeted him, for the two headstones were being visited more often these days.

The Renegades’ slogan was written on top of the wall where the headstones rested.

Bold. Valiant. Just

Written in shining silver, so they didn’t take much attention from the spots where the two fallen Council members laid.

Right now, the bottom of the wall was upholstered with Blacklight and Lady Indomitable plushies, photographs, and tons of flowers.

So many flowers, that Adrian had to, manually, remove some of them to make his way to the wall; first, he left the bouquet he had brought for Evander; he had put some snacks in it, because it had seemed…funny in a bittersweet way at the moment, and also tons of polaroid photos Adrian had taken with him some years ago, when he was trying to entertain him during a Christmas dinner.

Evander had always been Adrian’s favorite Council member, because he…was young enough to treat him as brother; of course, Evander was an adult, but that didn’t change the fact he was younger than 14 when Adrian was born, and they had always shared a rather close relationship. He was annoying at times and, during the last months he was alive, he had fallen into a bottomless pit of madness, which deformed his personality until he almost acted like a dictator.

Of course, Adrian didn’t condone that, but he still had good memories regarding Evander and he doubted he would ever get rid of those memories. Mostly because…somehow, he didn’t want to.

 “May the light guide your way.”

Evander Wade. Blacklight.

Brother, husband, father, friend and hero.

 Adrian supposed the right thing to do would’ve been saying something, but he hadn’t come here today to talk to Evander, so he didn’t have anything to tell him. Not really.

So he just touched the headstone, but then he moved on to his mom’s, which was to the left of Evander’s.

And there she was.

There was Mom.

“When in doubt…fly.”

Georgia Rawles. Lady Indomitable.

Sister, mother, friend and hero.

 And also gone too soon, like Evander, but nobody ever wanted to say that, because it was depressing.

Gulping, Adrian placed the bouquet of white and pink roses on the floor, and ran his fingers through his mother’s name.

“You can’t see it…but I have a lot of bandages beneath my clothes.” He told her, barely able to laugh. “…because I got a ton of tattoos. I don’t know if you would’ve approved that but…yeah. I already took them off, though…in the most violent way you can imagine. But I’m doing good.”

His sentences, like it always happened, were met with cold silence, as Adrian ceased caressing the name and hugged himself, feeling the bandages that were wrapped around his body; the wounds barely hurt anymore, though. After all, they had been treated by a prodigy healer; the process was supposed to be this fast.

“I hope you’re doing good too.” Adrian said, taking a deep breath, before staring at his feet.

If he had to find a word to describe what he had been feeling since the battle of the cathedral, that word would’ve been “shock”. Because, there in the cathedral, it had been the first time somebody had told him what he had done. And his heart had been feeling heavy ever since , and Adrian didn’t know how he was going to get up from this one.

Maybe he wouldn’t.

Maybe it was something that would torment him forever unless he got help, which didn’t seem so unlikely, given that he had his dads were supportive and also willing to help him go through the process and everything.

But everything was way too heavy, just…

Knowing what he had done, even if it hadn’t been directly his fault.

“Something that seems…extremely weird, in the good sense…. Is that…” Adrian coughed. “I crossed paths with the little girl you were trying to save, and you would be happy to know she’s an amazing person…and…well…she’s my girlfriend now so, you know…she…she’s just amazing, and I love her; I guess you would’ve loved her too...”

His voice was starting to break, but Adrian chose to continue, adjusting his glasses using his pinky and sniffing.

“She’s also very broken. But she’s trying to get better, and forgive…” He said. “….I like to believe you would forgive me too, you know? Because I…I don’t know. We both know what happened. And I…”

I’m sorry.

“I loved you so much. I still do. I’m sorry my fear of losing you was bigger, until it took you away. You didn’t deserve that.” Adrian had no longer control over his shaking hands. “You were supposed to be here; to meet Nova; to be with me and I’m…I’m sorry I…I’m so sorry, mom.”

He shook and shivered, but he didn’t cry.

Not yet.

Because when he touched his mother’s headstone again, he just remembered the texture of her skin; it was always soft and warm, although her hands were a little calloused, and she smelled like violets and sun (even if people tended to insist on the fact that the sun didn’t smell like anything); he remembered how he wrapped his legs around her waist as she held him into her arms and danced with him around the apartment to Have You Ever Seen the Rain, although Adrian didn’t understand the lyrics back then and he was yet to have the guts to listen to the song again; he remembered how Mom spun around, kissing his nose, and at some point she got so lost in the moment, that her feet lifted up from the ground.

That had been a good day. And those had been a good 6 years. And while Adrian rested his head against the headstone, he almost felt the fabric of her pants, as he saw her taking out her Lady Indomitable costume and begged her to stay at home, just for today.

Now that he was older, he had grown to accept that had been her job, and he was her legacy, although not everything that was left of her.

This world. The whole twisted yet powerful everything this world had, was what was left of Georgia Rawles. And Adrian would forever be proud she was his mom, just like he was proud Hugh and Simon were his dads. Because he had fallen in the safest place he could think of.

Adrian remained like that for a while, pressing his forehead against Mom’s headstone until, through the thick blank noise, he heard knocking; three gentle knocks on the gates by the entrance, which made him jump.

And, when he turned around, all he could see was Hugh.

Which…didn’t surprise him at all.

He was wearing a jacket and jeans, but Adrian could see that his blue shirt was the one he often wore to sleep; besides, he was fidgeting with the car keys between his fingers, which only confirmed what Adrian had been thinking before leaving the house.

He should’ve had notified his dads he was leaving early; he had risen with the sun, only to be here in the cemetery before everyone else could. But he hadn’t told Hugh or Simon.

And, lately, Simon had been having trouble to sleep, so by the time the sun was rising, he often went to Adrian’s room and slept on the couch; he supposed he had tried to do that, and then he hadn’t found him, which led to immediate chaos.

Yet, Hugh didn’t seem mad.

In fact, once he put the car keys inside his pockets, he smiled.

“Mind if I join you?”

Adrian didn’t answer, but Hugh understood it was a positive answer anyway, so he went ahead; the sound of his steps created a faint echo, and when he was next to him, Hugh wrapped an arm around Adrian’s shoulder, gently.

Then, they both stared at the headstone in silence, as if they both were having their own private conversation with Georgia, in a crowded, yet very intimate scenario; a phenomena that went on until Hugh scoffed, laughing at his own thoughts, and looked at Adrian, saying:

“When your mother was pregnant, her baby bump remained hidden for quite some months; she only had a small bulge in her lower stomach…and we would always tease her about it saying that was just her abs..” He laughed. “…which would make her mad, of course. Georgia was such a mom. I feel like she really wanted to have a child, despite having acted as mom towards all of us…and she wanted to have a pretty baby bump, because she wanted to remind herself you were there….that, and cute maternity clothes, I guess.”

In response to the sudden comedy break, Adrian snorted, adjusting his glasses again.

“We can’t judge her.” He told Hugh. “We’ll never be pregnant, but we gotta admit maternity clothes are cool.”

“Oh, they were cool. And pretty expensive also. Geez, Adrian, thanks for forcing us into involuntary fasting.”

“Dad!” Adrian chuckled, punching him in the ribs, despite knowing Hugh hadn’t felt anything.

Hugh laughed with him, but his laugh, suddenly, became inexistent, and Hugh scratched his own chin, staring at the headstone. Smiling at it, and probably waiting for something that would not happen.

So he decided to speak again, although his voice sounded more hesitant, and the most…insecure Adrian had ever perceived it.

“Your dad was going crazy.”

Adrian already knew that, even if nobody had told him.

“…but I told him to calm down, because I just…knew you were here. It’s where I always come when things are rough.”

To that sentence, Adrian stared at his feet, but not yet pulling away from his father’s touch. He knew Mom and Hugh had been pretty close but, if he wanted to be honest, he had no idea he liked to come here to visit her.

“Adrian, you see…” Hugh didn’t stare at him either.

“Your mom was amazing. She was…one of the most amazing people I’ve ever meet, and I don’t think anyone that I happen to meet in the future will top her…she was an outstanding mom and just…the coolest best friend I could ever ask for.”

As Hugh’s body seemed to grow weak, Adrian felt the burning need to hold his hand, but it was far.

“…and I miss her every day, just like you; and your dad, and Tamaya, and Kasumi, and…” For a whole second, Hugh’s lips quivered when he came to the realization he had been this close to list Evander, before noticing he was also gone, so Adrian remained staring at him.

And Hugh stared back, his blue eyes looking vulnerable and just…

Weak.

So, so weak and tiny.

“You were her son. And she loved you more than I’ve ever seen a mother love her child…and I know how much you’re hurting, because I know Simon and I will never be able to fill the space she left…believe me, we’re not trying to replace her…but we’re doing our best to be enough.” He said.

“….and I understand your pain…and your grief and all the awful things you might feel when you realize you’ll never see her again…because, Adrian, I…” His lips quivered again, but this time Hugh didn’t mind to stop him.

However, Adrian could see he was choking and stumbling on his pride, which stood stubbornly in the way, until Hugh decided he was stronger, let go of Adrian and held his hand instead, tightly.

“…I need her too.” He said, almost relieved, as if a secret of a lifetime had slipped from his mouth.

“I need her so much, and I miss her so much…because she was...like a sister. She was my best friend and she’s gone, and I have to live without her and…Sometimes I feel so lost…and I just know...” As tears streamed down his face, Hugh sniffed and looked away.

“…I just know she would’ve known what to do; she would’ve known how to stop this world from falling apart… and if she were here, Evander would’ve met his baby.” Hugh stared at him again, hiccupping.

“And you look so much like her, Adrian. And I miss her so much.”

Unable to see through the fog in his glasses, Adrian removed them, as his own chest went up and down, and he barely had time to process this was the second time he had seen Hugh cry.

“I miss her too.”

And as they wrapped their arms around the other, they mourned Adrian’s mother in the most peacefully painful way possible, just the two of them, in a mausoleum full of flowers, in front of her headstone, coming to the realization that they were damaged; far too damaged, but since they were still sane enough to admit it, it wasn’t too late for them to get help; maybe they would get help, and things would finally get better when they escaped the stunted grief and all the pain Mom had left behind.

He hugged Hugh tightly as he could, feeling as if this was the first time he had ever hugged him, or hold him close.

And he felt something.

Through the dread and the pain, Adrian felt as Mom let go of his hand, leaving a cold emptiness on his wrist, which later turned into warmth due to his own temperature, and Hugh’s hold.

“Simon and you are enough.” Adrian sobbed.

“You’ll forever be enough, and I’ll never be able to put into words how much I love you.”

He meant it. Because, again, Adrian felt safe right there where he was; he felt safe in Hugh’s arms, just like he felt in Simon’s… but there were some things that needed some talking.

Things that needed some type of resolution.

Things that were awful.

Things that were broken.

Things that were shattered.

But when the world crumbled down, as long as people had the willingness to do it, it wasn’t too late to build it again.

And, after all, the first step into fixing something, was accepting the fact it was broken.

[jawbonejoe]

Hey man, earnest question, might sound a bit loaded. How DO you get to actually feel the screw the world I'm me self-confidence? I try to exercise self-love but mostly it feels forced and fake. Like... how do you reach that. You just keep trying?

So, Anon, since your question two things happened to me. The first happened to the rest of the planet: watching Trump lose the election and thus, the end of a four year nightmare draws nearer. 

The second thing happened to only a handful of people in that same world: a dear friend of mine lost his year long battle with leukemia. I found out via his wife’s posts on fb, and bc I was in the middle of cooking with my family on an otherwise celebratory day there wasn’t much I could do to reach out and console her. 

I already had the bones of your answer figured out by the time both things happened and now I know even more clearly what to tell you. 

You’re on the right path, self care and self love and confidence are absolutely practice and patience and more practice. It will feel fake at first bc you have to be bad at something before you are good at it. But we don’t have a cute saying for nothing ‘fake it till you make it is’ absolutely real. 

But I do think you’re looking at the thing in the wrong light. Self-love and confidence should not come from any ‘screw the world’ doctrine. I can see why you would call it that, especially when asking me because I do have a very ‘screw off’ attitude about things. The difference I want to make clear is that self love and confidence are not about the relationship of the self to the world, but the self to the self. You interact with the world every day as a jumble of information being broadcast through your body by a piece of meat with a little electricity inside it. That information is interpreted into sensation, emotion, memory, thought, and of course it is acted upon by the outside world and then reinterpreted to meet the meat’s needs. Being such a crazy living jumble is insane enough but then you have to go out and deal with other people who are also insane living jumbles of things. 

That’s where confidence comes in, because the world will interpret you as it wants and one of the few ways to inform its decision is to act like you can handle whatever it’s going to do to you. This is a skill that can be taught, and for those who have to self teach it there’s no better way to learn it than by following an example.

Why I need you to know it’s not a you v. world relationship is because we’re all constantly becoming and reinforcing who and what we are. And within that, true confidence comes from being someone you like being and trusting you can keep being that. The work there comes with reflection and practice and I can’t tell you how helpful it is to have people who will push you to be the best version of yourself. 

‘Screw the world’ offers too little to the importance of sharing life with other people. Humans are pack animals, we’re pattern finding machines, and those things together mean that we’re more highly adapted to develop profound bonds with each other than any other animal. 

I learned 80% of my own self love routine from my good friend who had spent much of their early life being denied any agency in who they were and thus developed the most powerful armor of self love I’ve ever seen. For them it came from necessity, their love was the thing they needed to stay alive and flourish. From them I learned that being bold and sure of that self love is one of the best ways to reinforce it and broadcast a similar feeling of the power of pride to others. 

Making the choice to love the self every day is key. So are things like self care, good health habits, finding time for art and hobbies, tricks like evaluating how you use language especially when talking to or about yourself. I make a point to never tell self deprecating jokes or even allude to such things because not only are they not funny but they tell my jumble of neurons the exact opposite of what we’ve worked so hard to know. As a woman I still struggle with using filler language in how I express myself, things like pre-facing my statements with ‘I think’ or ‘Maybe’ or ‘Well if you ask me.’ It seems like a small thing in the grand scheme but really understanding how you use language and how you can better use it to help you feel confident is a good first step and can always be improved as you learn and build your own routine. 

What I can’t understate is how important it is to care. Screw the world is just one way self love and confidence can manifest itself but really it’s bravado because the thing that really matters is wanting to be in the world as someone you like. That feeling of being a peace with who you are, with an eye towards who you want to be, will attract people who like who you are and help you reinforce this idea. I can’t tell you the number of times I felt down and then thought ‘well, I’m best friends with some of the greatest people I’ve ever met, and I know they have great taste so are they wrong for liking me? Hell no!’ Nevermind that having them in my life gives me people I admire that I can look to and say ‘hmm, what would X do in this situation?’ 

Self love is so personal it’s easy to think of it as some unteachable skill that you’re either born with or not. I tell you that couldn’t be more wrong. Don’t misunderstand, you can not make people love themselves when they don’t, and that is sad but at the end of the day there will be people in your life who enjoy making themselves miserable. You should care for other people but never give so much of yourself that you get nothing back. A good friend will give as much joy as they receive from you. 

There is so much to self love that I could go on and on but here’s what I learned from my late friend. As a trans man he made the decision, the painful and scary and hard decision, to be who he was every day of his life. He struggled with it, he fought to understand it, he surrounded himself with people who loved who he was always meant to be even before he could name it himself. He let himself feel the richness of life, he chose to be creative and funny and smart and kind. He was tough when he wanted to be and he showed every quality that a man should have because he chose to be the man he was every single day. 

That’s not to say he never questioned or struggled or even failed in who he was but he always got back up and kept fighting to be the best version of himself. In him I always saw an example of how to be the person you want to be, an example of what every person should be. He laughed the hardest at his own jokes, he loved deliriously, he never denied himself his emotions and their expression, and whenever he wanted something he went out and leapt for it. 

Self love is never you v. the world because that’s how you miss out on all the people who help you realize who you want to be. You live for the world, you are a part of the world knowing itself in every little moment you exist. Those who don’t care about the world will only grow their unhappiness because they’re denying the importance of the love that binds us all together. That love comes in big acts and small, I personally love the earthly pleasures of food and drink and art because they can be enjoyed with just a little practice and skill and can be shared as much as they can be enjoyed solo. 

Every time you choose who you are and who you want to be you perform another act of self love. It may feel like a lot of goofy clown work at first but consider that digging the foundation that stronger and stronger self love will build on. So, long answer to your short question, yes. Keep trying. Look to the world and see its beauty, let yourself feel and learn as much as you can and let other people love you. They will help you be the best you just as much as you help them. And before long the goofy clown work won’t be goofy any more it will just be the truth. You’ll start to look to yourself for the love you need when you need it, and that will enrich the love you continue to feel with others.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Fics where they pine over each other while the other one is in a relationship? Example: Sherlock pines for John while he's with Mary or someone else. Or John pines for Sherlock while he's with someone else. Preferably with a happy ending!!

Anonymous said to inevitably-johnlocked: Do you know of any fics where either John, Sherlock or both of them are in relationships which stops them from getting together? Idk if I’m explaining this well. Kind of like fics where Sherlock is pining for John but they can’t be together bc John’s already with Mary or someone else but there’s still a lot flirting and stuff. Or it could be the opposite where John pines for Sherlock but Sherlock is dating someone else. And ones where there’s a happy ending, and they get together! Thanks!!

Hi Nonnies!

I’m feeling like you’re the same nonny, since these came in around the same time and are worded very similarly, but I’ll assume they’re not and put these together since they’re very similar :) I for sure have fics with these parameters on these lists here:

Pining Sherlock || [MOBILE FRIENDLY VERSION]

John Marries and Sherlock Admits his Feelings

Mutual Pining

Infidelity

John Chooses Sherlock Over Mary

I have a couple other pining lists I’ve still to post, LOL. But let’s go through my bookmarks and see what I got for you. Some of these are like… really LIGHT on the “relationship as an obstacle” but they’re the catalyst of sorts. I’ve certainly missed a lot, these are just the ones I recall for sure that there was a relationship of sorts before Johnlock LOL. I might have messed up on one or two fics but I hope you don’t hold it against me, LOL

——–

RELATIONSHIPS AN OBSTACLE TO JOHNLOCK

I don’t mind by beltainefaerie (G, 221 w., 1 Ch. || Pining Sherlock, Stag Night, 221B, Post-TRF, Angst, Longing) – Sherlock is more vulnerable than he pretends. Part 4 of Bel’s Tumblr Ficlets

And Then I Fall by sherlockholmes_doctorwatson (G, 973 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, Unrequited Love, POV Sherlock, Reichenfeels) – He was right. Falling is just like flying.

The Talons of Sentiment by dearcst (G, 1,463 w., 1 Ch. || First Person POV, Angst, Unrequited Love, Pining Sherlock) – I promised myself long ago I wouldn’t succumb to something so degrading, something so vicious. I promised I wouldn’t let myself fall. But that was before him. That was before I met John. In sleep there is such bliss and peace, and as John slept on my shoulder, it killed me inside to know I was so close yet I could never touch him.

In Which John is Attractive and Sherlock is Angry by kim47 (T, 2,382 w., 1 Ch. || Fluff, Est. Rel., Jealous Sherlock) – Sherlock’s reaction to finding out that everyone wants HIS John, and how he told them to piss off and get their own Watson.

and stand there at the edge of my affection by coloredink (G, 2,683 w., 1 Ch. || Fluff, Letters, Clueless John) – “You’ve written love letters,” Sherlock asserted.

No Strings Attached by Elster (G, 2,714 w., 1 Ch. || Magical Realism, Fairy Tales, Love Confessions, Fae/Faeries) – To save John from being spirited away Under the Hill, Sherlock challenges the fairy queen to a fiddle contest.

Turn the key, and come home by TooManyChoices (M, 2,718 w., 1 Ch. || First Kiss / Time, Angst With a Happy Ending, Emotional Messes, Implied Sex, Angst and Humour, Bed Sharing, Post-TRF) – Sherlock and John have been dancing around what’s between them for years. Will John return to Baker Street, and if so, will things ever be the same?

Let Go by thisisforyou (G, 2,743 w., 1 Ch. || Friends to Lovers, First Kiss, Fluff, Anxious / Worried Sherlock) – In the end, separating John’s things from Sherlock’s in the chaos of their sitting room is like pulling a limpet from a wet rock. Especially when the rock is clinging on for dear life, because Sherlock doesn’t want to let go. Short, fluffy h/c Johnlock oneshot.

It’s After That Hurts by jonnyluvssherlock (T, 2,791 w., 1 Ch. || City of Angels AU || Fantasy, Fallen Angel Sherlock, Soldier John, Pining Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, Permanently Incomplete Fic) – Sherlock’s an angel stuck as a guardian to danger addict John Watson. Everything is fine until he gets too involved. Now he has to make the choice, eternity alone or one life time with a man who may or may not love him.

Better Late Than Never by sussexbound (NR (T), 3,021 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S4 / TFP Doesn’t Exist, Sherlock POV, Love Confessions, Drunk Sherlock / Sober John, John Takes Care of Sherlock, First Kiss, Jealous Sherlock, Emotional Turmoil) – He suddenly wants John Watson out of his bedroom, out of his flat, out of his life, because he has been lying to himself these last few months, he realises. He doesn’t want John here, not with the way things are. He doesn’t want 221b Baker Street to be nothing more than rest stop John returns to on his journeys between women. He doesn’t want to play co-parent if Rosie is going to be snatched away from him and placed in the arms of whatever nameless woman du jour John lands on next. He doesn’t want to keep being so careful, so generous, so, so…

Until the End of the World by SarahCat1717 (G, 3,049 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, First Kiss, Pining Sherlock, Oblivious John, Drunkenness) – Taking place in Season 3, John listens to an old favourite song and sorts through his memories and feelings about Sherlock and Mary.

MR# 1430155 by blueink3 (T, 3,560 w., 1 Ch. || Talks of Parentlock, Baby Watson, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, Fluff and Angst) – John paces the length of the not inconsiderable hallway and glances at his phone for the tenth time since he exited the hospital room seven minutes ago. Sherlock’s last text was sent at 5:06pm. It is now 5:39pm. He should be here by now. After all, his daughter is 46-minutes-old and if John is going to share this momentous event with someone, it sure as hell isn’t going to be the woman who just gave birth to her. Part 5 of Tumblr Prompts

But Tonight You Belong to Me by esplanade (T, 4,296 w., 1 Ch. || Fluff & Angst, Pining, Stag Night, Sad Ending) – “You. It’s always you. John Watson, you keep me right.”

The Prize We Sought Is Won by deathfrisbees (E, 4,610 w., 1 Ch. || First Time, Mild D/S, Oral, Military Kink, Bottomlock) – Sherlock’s in love, or in lust, or both–unfortunately, the object of his affections is not only his completely oblivious flatmate, but said flatmate would probably run screaming into the hills should he find out. John’s been invited to a wedding–unfortunately, the groom used to serve under him back in Afghanistan, and requests that John wear a uniform he’s honestly not sure he fits into. Unfortunately for both flatmates, Sherlock’s got a military kink the size of Kandahar and John wants to know if he actually can fit into this uniform or if his eyes are deceiving him. It goes from there.

You Can’t Always Get What You Want by hubblegleeflower (E, 4,804 w., 1 Ch. || Pining, Sexual Tension, UST / RST, First Time) – John wants. He always has, but now that he’s living with Sherlock again, it’s all he can do to hold it back. And Sherlock isn’t helping…

No Light, No Light (in your bright blue eyes) by orphan_account (G, 5,915 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, Pining, Songfic, Mutual Unrequited Love, Unresolved Tension, UST/URT) – Relates to both Sherlock’s and John’s feelings for each other and highlights select moments of hurt and inner turmoil starting from right before the fall all the way to HLV.

Recovery by thesignsofserbia (T, 5,948 w., 1 Ch. || HLV-Fix It / Rewrite, Villain Mary, Pining Sherlock, Major Character Injury, Scars, Self-Hatred, POV Sherlock, Doctor John, Friends to Lovers) – Set after the confrontation with Mary, and Sherlock’s cardiac arrest, John stays at 221B to aid Sherlock’s recovery, forcing them to confront wounds both old and new as they try to heal their damaged relationship.

An Interpretation of Viewing Habits by akitsuko (E, 6,653 w., 1 Ch. || Porn Watching, Masturbation, Anal, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss / Time, Declarations of Love, Jealous Sherlock, Fantasizing, John in Denial / Internalized Homophobia, Bottomlock, Pining Idiots, Sherlock Has No Boundaries, Cockblocking Sherlock) – John watches porn. It’s a perfectly normal thing to do. If every video he watches happens to feature actors with remarkable physical similarities to his flatmate, well, that’s no one’s business but his own. Or: John is in denial, until his infatuation with Sherlock is impossible to deny anymore.

The Light of Day by allonsys_girl (M, 7,297 w., 4 Ch. || First Kiss, Angst, TSo3-Fix-It, Possessive Sherlock) – Rewrite of the end of Sign of Three. John actually notices Sherlock leaving the reception early, and chases after him. Angsty Johnlock. Happy ending, for sure. Part 1 of The Light of Day

On the Losing Side by missselene (E, 8,210 w., 1 Ch. || Anal / Oral, First Kiss / Time, Angst, Misunderstandings, Mild Dub Con / Drunk John) – After Mary’s death, John moves back into Baker Street, but is still upset at the loss of his wife and child. Eventually, he and Sherlock stumble into a sort of relationship, but it’s more physical than anything and they don’t talk about it. They especially don’t talk during sex. If they are going to have sex, Sherlock notices the signs hours beforehand, and he prepares carefully. The lights are off, they’re under the covers, he prepares himself using lots of lube so he can make it feel as much like a woman as he can, and he doesn’t let himself make any noise so that, if John wishes, he can pretend that he’s still with Mary.

The Engine by stitchy (T, 8,294 w., 1 Ch. || First Kiss, ASiP Do-Over, Sci-Fi, Time Travel) – Shortly after the events of His Last Vow, Sherlock has an opportunity to revisit the night of A Study in Pink and get some perspective on the destiny of he and John’s relationship.

Every Night I Look for You by destinationtoast (E, 8,377 w., 1 Ch. || POV John, Post-TRF, Angst, Mystery, Unsafe Sex, BAMF John) – Every night, John looks for familiar hints of Sherlock in the men he meets in bars, and he does with them all the things he wishes he’d done before. Eventually, he stumbles into a situation that Sherlock would know how to handle, and John must decide whether he can handle it without him.

Matters of National Security by mistyzeo (E, 8,465 w., 1 Ch. || BAMF John, Doctor John, Jealous Sherlock, Dating, Bisexuality, Arguing, Stupidity, Teasing, First Kiss/Time, Hand Jobs, Frottage, RST, Idiots in Love) – John starts dating a male client of Sherlock’s, and Sherlock can’t figure out why he’s so incensed about it.

To Quote Malcolm Tucker; or, Get The Fuck In or Fuck The Fuck Off by kim47 (T, 8,484 w., 1 Ch. || Jealous Sherlock, Flirting, Cockblocking) – Sherlock is cockblocker and a prick tease and John is not amused.

Never Been This Swept Away by estalita11 (T, 8,531 w, 1 Ch. || Post-TAB, Mary is Not Nice, Drug Use, First Kiss, Love Confessions) – Set immediately after TAB, Sherlock visits his brother to definitely not apologize about earlier and ends up finally learning a few things that would have been nice knowing about months ago. Mycroft never wants to deal with lovestruck idiots ever again.

High Tide by stardust_made (T, 8,540 w., 1 Ch. || Jealousy, Angst, First Kiss) – A little favour Sherlock stupidly agrees to do for Mycroft leads to John meeting a handsome, affluent man, who is going out of his way to woo him. Sherlock struggles with the situation and with his own reactions to it. Part 1 of The High Tide Series

Bread and Wine and Curry Once a Week by cwb (E, 8,737 w., 1 Ch. || Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Stroppy Sherlock, Love Letters, POV John) – Sherlock asks John for relationship advice. Little does he know that it’s him that Sherlock is in love with.

All the Times Something ALMOST Happened by allonsys_girl (T, 9,049 w., 6 Ch. || POV Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Canon Compliant, Angst, Friendship/Love, UST) – John and Sherlock dancing around what they dance around in canon.

How To Give Your Boyfriend Who Doesn’t Know He’s Your Boyfriend the Best Valentine’s Day Ever by unicornpoe (T, 9,832 w., 1 Ch. || Valentine’s Day, Fluff and Crack, Soft Sherlock, POV Sherlock) – Sherlock is pretty sure that John Watson is his boyfriend. He’s also pretty sure that John doesn’t know it. But with a little help from a magazine, some friends, three crepes, five dates, one awesome CD, and a stalker van, John is bound to realize just in time for Valentine’s Day.

Someone I Love by hudders-and-hiddles (M, 10,002 w., 2 Ch. || Canon Compliant, HLV-Filler Fic, Pre-Slash, Jealous John, PIning Sherlock, Angst & Fluff, UST/URT, Dog Tags) – John gets married and Sherlock finds comfort in wearing John’s identity tags around his wrist.

Paparazzi by SilentAuror (E, 10,543 w., 1 Ch. || Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Post S3) – John moves back into 221B Baker Street after his marriage falls apart and the paparazzi won’t leave him and Sherlock alone about the status of their supposed relationship. Sherlock, of course, never denies it, until one day he does…

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder by cypress_tree (E, 10,669 w. || UST/RST, For an Experiment) – John helps Sherlock with an experiment: for an entire month, they are not allowed to touch each other and must remain at least one metre apart at all times.

London Gods by a_different_equation (E, 11,092 w., 5 Ch. || American Gods Fusion || Magical Realism, Sex Magic, True Love, PTSD John, First Kiss/Time, Marathon Sex, Sensuality, Genie Sherlock, Human John, Internalized Homophobia, Star-Crossed Lovers, Soul Mates) – Sherlock Holmes is a jinn who does not grant wishes. However, when Dr. John H. Watson, recently returned from the war in Afghanistan, gets into his cab by “accident”, it might not even need magic to grant both men their deepest wish: love.

A Brand of Gold by aquabelacqua (M, 12,757 w., 1 Ch. || Mutual Pining, POV John, Phone Sex, Texting, Masturbation, Long Distance, Drunk Texting) – What am I doing? he wondered. The answer came back at once: Flirting. He let the vital, missing piece snap into place as surely and as cleanly as if it had always been there. He was flirting with Sherlock Holmes.

I’m content as we are (but) by inqui (The_Circus) (E, 13,086 w. || Jealous John, UST/RST, Pining, Victor Trevor, Minor Whump, First Kiss / Time, Misunderstandings) – In which John Watson sees something unusual, becomes jealous, and makes too much of a small thing as an old friend of Sherlock’s shows up in the middle of a case.

Say For Me, Love by MirabileLectu (T, 13,147 w., 1 Ch. || UST, First Kiss, Drama, Pining John, Victor Trevor) – If you had asked John this morning what the result of his quiet afternoon at home would be, discovering a truth about Sherlock’s past startling enough to shift the foundations of their friendship would not have been his first guess. So naturally, that was what was bound to happen.

The Nutcracker by Odamaki (T, 13,758 w., 7 Ch. || Nutcracker AU ||  Christmas, Dark Magic, Dolls) – Sherlock is unimpressed with Uncle Rudy’s present. A doll? What does he want with a doll?

Barricade by stitchy (M, 14,127 w., 1 Ch. || HLV Fix It, Friends to Lovers, Angst, Happy Ending, UST, Mary’s Not Nice, First Time, Pining Sherlock, Time Skip Filler, Drunkenness) – Sherlock has been struggling to keep his feelings at bay for everyone’s sake. Part 1 of Barricade

Pattern Behaviour by SilentAuror (E, 14,835 w., 1 Ch. || POV First Person Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Introspection, Stroppy Sherlock, Light Humour, Friendship, John Takes Care of Sherlock, First Kiss/Time, Wall Kisses, Fluffy Angst, Happy Ending) – Sherlock doesn’t even know why he resents John’s dates so much. Until the day he does know. Slight angst, unrequited feelings (but don’t let that scare you off!)

Second Chance by SilentAuror (E, 15,816 w., 1 Ch. || Post-Divorce, Friends to Lovers, UST, Romance) – Now that John’s divorce has gone through and the dust is settling, Sherlock thinks that he would very much like to see if there is any possibility of moving their friendship in another direction. The only thing is, he has no idea how to go about doing that…

The Palmyra Atoll by elwinglyre (E, 16,609 w., 3 Ch. || TSo3 Divergence / Episode Fix-It, Stockholm Syndrome, Kidnapped John Watson, John Whump, Evil Mary, Angst, Cuddling & Snuggling, Toplock, Limited 3rd John POV) – As John’s preparing for the wedding, Sherlock is preparing to have his heart broken, and Mary is prepared to do the unthinkable. Intervention required. Enter Sherlock. Set before Sign of Three with a far different outcome. John is drugged, kidnapped, and left on an island, but not just any old island.

Software Malfunction by tiger_in_the_flightdeck (E, 16,679 w., 1 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Android Sherlock, Love Story, Unhappy Ending, Angst, Suicide, Jealousy) – “You think I can’t love you? Just because you’re made with metal, and detailed programming?” The doctor propped himself on his elbow, and looked down at it. “I am nothing but blood and bone, and tissue. Things just managed get mashed together in a manner that made me like this. Just like you were put together to make you how you are. When I kiss you-” he did so, briefly, to prove his point. Then more deeply, and lingering, because he could. “When I touch you, or smile at you, does it make you feel different from when others have done it in the past?”

Best of Three by SilentAuror (E, 17,473 w., 1 Ch || POV John, 3G Moment, Porn with Feels, Post HLV, Rimming, Denial, Anal) – “You want to have sex with me,” Sherlock announces one evening about a year after John’s divorce. John’s vigorous denial sparks a three-day wager wherein Sherlock is determined to prove his point, and John is determined to hold onto his heterosexuality. Set well after HLV. (Canon-compliant). PORN. With feels.

Let’s Make a Bed Out in the Rain by theimprobable1 (M, 17,664 w., 11 Ch.|| Pining Sherlock, Angst & Fluff, First Kiss, Unrequited, Jealous Sherlock, Protective Sherlock) – John is devastated after his long-term girlfriend leaves him. Sherlock helps him through it.

I Think I’ve Come A Long Long Way To Sit Before You Here Today by ArwenKenobi (T, 18,251 w., 3 Ch. || Grief/Mourning, Passage of Time, Major Character Death, Alternating POV, Sherlock Whump, Pining Sherlock, Hospitalization, Coma, Revenge Murders, Hallucinations, Love Confessions, Brutal Accident, Mystrade, Ghost John) – One year after John is killed Sherlock starts to wonder whether John has actually gone anywhere.

John Watson doesn’t have a Boyfriend by naughtyspirit (E, 18,932 w., 7 Ch. || UST / URT, Fluff & Smut, Voyeurism, Masturbation) – John’s date has gone very well. Sherlock requires tea. John wishes he hadn’t resolved that their relationship was strictly hands off and isn’t about to address it. Unless he has to. Smut, fluff and shower time for a naked John Watson.

For you, there’s only me by shock_blanket (E, 19,557 w., 7 Ch. || Jealous Idiots, Virgin Sherlock, UST/RST, Pining, Miscommunication, First Kiss / Time, Insecure Sherlock, Masturbation) – Sherlock realizes he has fallen in love with John, but believes he is unlovable. Cue lots of pining and jealousy on Sherlock’s part, followed by our favorite cuddly marksman making it all better. Because for Sherlock, there’s only John.

A Life Well-Lived by Kate_Lear (E, 20,121 w., 1 Ch. || Original Male Character, Sherlock Woos John, Jealous Sherlock, Reluctant Bi-John, Past Abuse, Insecure John, Reassuring / Caring Sherlock, Protective Sherlock, Understanding Sherlock) – John got scared off men by an abusive past relationship. Sherlock has to try and woo him while not scaring him off with protective possessive rage.

The White Lotuses by SilentAuror (E, 20,340 w., 1 Ch. || Slowburn, Domestic, Romance) – One day John realises that he just isn’t where he belongs, which is back at Baker Street with Sherlock. So he goes back and Sherlock, in his own way, courts him. Romance.

Love Is by SilentAuror (E, 21,508 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, UST / URT, Post HLV, Romance) – At Mrs Hudson’s urging, Sherlock finally decides to tell John how he feels about him. Part 1 of Love Is

5 Times John Got the Girl (and lost her) and 1 Time John Got the Guy (and kept him) by LiviKate (M, 21,695 w., 6 Ch. || 5 and Ones, Kissing, Oblivious / Awkward Sherlock, BAMF / Sexy / Stud John, Embarassed John, John’s Scar, Hurt/Comfort, Jealous Sherlock) – John has always had good luck with the ladies. He’s charming, friendly and funny, not to mention great in bed. However, his usual skill with the opposite sex is constantly being thwarted by Sherlock and his outbursts. How will John ever get a leg over when Sherlock is always cockblocking him?

A Shipless Ocean by myswordfishmind (M, 22,135 w., 4 Ch. || Post-TRF, John has a Kid) – Ten years after the fall Sherlock goes back to London to find that John no longer lives there. Instead, he resides in a seaside town, a widower, and the father of a seven year old son. Now, Sherlock must struggle with the fact that there may no longer be a place for him in this new world.

Dear John by wendymarlowe (E, 23,031 w., 64 Ch. || Post-TRF, Online Dating, Pining, Epistolary, Cybersex, Long Distance Romance) – With Sherlock dead, John eventually (under duress) makes a profile on an online dating site. And falls into a long-distance relationship with an enigmatic partner who reminds him of Sherlock in all the right ways. (Hint: it turns out to be Sherlock.) Part 1 of Dear John

Once Upon a Beast Becoming by antietamfalls (T, 24,042 w., 6 Ch. || Beauty and the Beast AU || Magical Realism, Folklore, Celtic Mythology) – An act of pride, a druid’s curse, an enchanted leaf; Sherlock’s torment has lasted an age. Hope arrives in the form of one John Watson, a man uniquely suited to break the spell. But with a single night to win his affections, Sherlock finds his carefully laid plans disrupted by a monstrous killer whose sights are set on the only thing he has left to lose: John.

Maintaining A Personal Life by Gingerhermit (E, 24,284 w., 6 Ch. || Alternating POV’s, Bisexuality, BAMF!John, Jealous Sherlock, Romance / Drama, Sort-of Case Fic, Peril & Angst, Love Confessions, Toplock, Soft Idiots in Love, Post S3) – Sherlock and John discover some interesting revelations about each other’s sexuality, which lead them both to question the assumptions they’ve made about one another for years. In the midst of their mutual discoveries, a dangerous psychopath looms on the side-lines who threatens to destroy their new beginning.

Tomorrow’s Song by agirlsname (M, 24,645 w., 5 Ch. || Post-TRF, POV Sherlock, Angst with a Happy Ending, Virgin / Repressed Sherlock, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Pining, Jealous Sherlock) – How can he think a relationship with me would be a good idea? I am the sort of person to take a break from my life and when I come back after two years, I expect to find it exactly as I left it. In reality I find it shattered to pieces. (I actually equate you with my life. When did I start doing that?)

State of Flux by Atiki (E, 24,655 w., 4 Ch. || S3 Fix It, Sherlock POV, Slow Burn, First Kiss/Time, Friends to Lovers, Frottage, Cuddles and Snuggles, Awkwardness, Insecure/Virgin Sherlock, Romance, Humour, Masturbation, Love Declarations, Bottomlock, Brief Suicidal Ideations) – John’s marriage is over and he is finally back home (i.e. at Baker Street, where he belongs). Sherlock is awfully insecure and John is awfully hesitant, and they’re both awkward idiots, of course, but they figure it out. Many First Times happen.

Dropping the Act by jadztone (T, 27,258 w., 10 Ch. || Parentlock, Fake Relationship, Mary’s Family, Post-S4, Cuddling & Snuggling, Bed Sharing, Pining, Christmas) – Sherlock and John are quite happy living together with Rosie in Baker St. They might be even happier if they didn’t act towards each other like their love is only platonic. Mycroft brings troubling news in the form of Mary’s parents wanting to know just what their grandchild’s home life is like. The boys decide to spend Christmas pretending like they are in love in order to seem more like a “normal” family. It’s easy enough to pretend when all you’re doing is dropping the act.

Don’t Leave Anything Out by lookupkate (E, 27,422 w., 24 Ch. || Letters / Epistolary, Misunderstandings, Angst, Happy Ending, Alternate First Meeting, Sherlock in Love, Pining Sherlock) – The first letter John writes home from Afghanistan is meant to go to a woman he went on only one date with. How it ends up in Sherlock’s hands is completely innocent. What happens next is not. What do you do when you find out the person you’re in love with has been lying about something as monumental as who they are? What do you do when you’re the one who lied?How on earth do you put the pieces back together?

Sherlock Holmes & The Mysterious Ex by Gatergirl79 (M, 27,942 w., 16 Ch. || Family, Romance, Holmes Family) – Sherlock and John are forced to spend Christmas with Sherlock’s family. An unsettling idea especially when John will have to play ‘Boyfriend’ thanks to Mycroft. But why exactly does Sherlock want to avoid a family party?

Another Auld Lang Syne by DiscordantWords (M, 30,234 w., 31 Ch. || Post S4, Mutual Pining, Alternating POV, Introspection, Parentlock, Christmas, New Year’s, First Kiss, Past Drug Use, Angst with Happy Ending, Drinking, Sherlock Whump) – There had been years of missed chances.

The Kissing Disease by cottonballz_of_death (E, 30,856 w., 15 Ch. || Sickfic, Angst with Happy Ending, Case Fic, Self-Harm, Slow Burn, Jealous Sherlock, Body Image Issues, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional H/C, POV Sherlock, Oral / Anal, Thong, Frottage) – John brings home a boyfriend, shocking Sherlock, who long ago gave up hope that his straight flatmate would ever take a romantic interest in him. In a bid to reconnect with John, he tries to infect himself with a “harmless” virus. Neither of them is prepared for the emotional fallout that results.

Shallow Grave by SilentAuror (E, 31,672 w., 1 Ch. || Romance, Angst, HLV Fix It, Infidelity, Pining Sherlock, First Person POV Sherlock) – Starts as Sherlock’s plane is taking off at the end of His Last Vow. When he finds out that Moriarty is alive and that he’s being recalled from his mission, Sherlock decides that he should have told John how he felt before he left. So he walks off the plane and kisses him.

The Midas Touch by flawedamythyst (E, 32,231 w., 1 Ch. || Magical Realism, John has a Magical Cock, Dub Con, Healer John) – John Watson has a medical condition that means everyone he sleeps with is instantly healed of all illness and injury. This causes complications when Sherlock breaks his arm, and even more complications when Sherlock falls in love with him. Yes, this is a story where John has a literal magic healing cock. It’s a lot less cracky than you’re probably imagining. Warning: Contains complex issues of sexual consent, although not between Sherlock and John.

A Study In Auto-Signatures, Sniper Dolphins, and Sex Holidays by cwb (E, 32,690 w., 8 Ch. || Case Fic, Post S3, Evil Mary, Dev. Rel., Beach Holidays, Confused Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, Honeymoon, Epistolary, Bottomlock, First Kiss / Time, Fluff, Secret Agents, BAMF!John) – John and Mary go on their sex holiday, and Sherlock is grumpy and pining about it. Part 1 of HOT DOLPHIN SEX

carrying up his morning tea by darcylindbergh (E, 34,504 w., 5 Ch. || Post S3, Minor Character Death, Grief/Mourning, Wakes/Funerals, Estranged John, Pining Sherlock, Depression/Insecurity, Slow Burn, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Chronic Pain/Injury, Reconciliation, Awkwardness, Loneliness, Scars, Angst With Happy Ending) – His fingers tremble as he dials and he can’t force them steady. Familiar number, even though he hasn’t used it in two years. He isn’t even sure he should be calling it now, but she’d asked. She’d made him promise.

That Partitioning of the Things of Youth by wearitcounts (E, 35,353 w., 7 Ch. || Humour and Angst, Post-TRF, Fake Relationship, UST / RST, Friends to Lovers, Jealous John) – Victor Trevor is in town, and nobody’s happy.

The Wrong Wagon by DancingGrimm (E, 35,663 w., 20 Ch. || Alternating POV, MollyxJohn [Molly pines for John], Public Sex, Casual Sex, Obliviousness, BAMF!John, Awkwardness, Angst & Humour, First Time, Virgin Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock) – Molly sees John in a new light and realises that she may have hitched her horse to the wrong wagon…or something like that. John pines for Sherlock and worries what he will think if he ever finds out. And Sherlock doesn’t know what Molly’s up to…but he knows he doesn’t like it.

Classified(s) by blueink3 (E, 36,153 w., 4 Ch. || Wedding Date AU || Fake Relationship, Jealous, PIning, H/C, Idiots in Love, Happy Ending, Mary is not Nice, Escort Service) – Clara’s American father is the ambassador to some such territory that Great Britain probably used to own, but she (and Harry’s undying love for her) is the reason John is getting on a flight at 12:30pm, flying across the second largest ocean in the world, and pretending to be in a perfectly happy, healthy relationship with an undoubtedly perfectly coiffed stranger. See, Clara is not only American (and wealthy to boot), she’s also best friends with John’s ex-fiancée. Whom she’s placed in the wedding party. As Maid of Honor. And John just happens to be Best Man. Bloody brilliant.

we have never seen a greater day than this by Lediona (T, 36,420 w., 7 Ch. || A Royal Night Out AU || WWII / VE Day, Prince Sherlock, Soldier John, Alternating POV, First Kiss, Bittersweet Ending, Homophobia, Dancing) – Peace. At long last. It’s VE Day and Prince William desires to join the celebrations. It is a night of excitement, danger and the first flutters of romance.

Malediction by MapleleafCameo (M, 36,680 w., 11 Ch. || Ladyhawke AU || Magical Realism, Romance, Curses, Eventual Happy Ending) – Cursed to a half-life, John and Sherlock must fight the forces of evil to be reunited once again.

Nothing to Make a Song About by emmagrant01 (E, 36,833 w., 10 Ch. || Post-TRF, First Time, Reunion, Jealous John, Pining Sherlock, Romance, Angst with Happy Ending, Sherlock Has a Boyfriend) – When Sherlock returned from his faked death, John could not forgive him for the deception and broke off their friendship. Ten years later, John returns to London in search of yet another new beginning. Sherlock, not surprisingly, is waiting.

A Promise Made to Be Broken by PlantsAreNeat (E, 37,018 w., 7 Ch. || Fake Relationship, Pining, Slow Burn, RST, Eventual Relationship, POV Sherlock) – A young John makes an ‘if we’re still single at 40, we’ll get together’ pledge to a woman who ends up all wrong for him. She keeps reminding him of the promise, and won’t let go of it. John asks Sherlock to pose as his boyfriend at a family wedding, so as to dash her hopes permanently. Sherlock, who has at last acknowledged his feelings for John, reluctantly agrees despite knowing how painful it will be to ‘have’ John, but not keep him.

Act IV by SilentAuror (E, 39,707 w., 1 Ch. || First Person POV Sherlock, HLV Fix-It, Infidelity, Angst, Drama) – After Sherlock is shot, John moves back into Baker Street. They spend the autumn together as John tries to make sense of his life and make some important decisions about both Mary and Sherlock. Canon-compliant, excerpts from His Last Vow.

(Never) Turn Your Back to the Sea by DiscordantWords (M, 39,968 w., 7 Ch. || Post S4 Fix It || Grief / Mourning, Victor Trevor, Friendship, Sherlock is Not Okay, Nightmares/Flashbacks/Panic Attacks, Parentlock, Pining Sherlock, Angst with Happy Ending, John Comes Home) – Baker Street is very much the same. Only different. And Sherlock is just trying not to drown.

Only To Be With You by SinceWhenDoYouCallMe_John (M, 40,768 w., 4 Ch. || Black Mirror / Future AU || Character Death, Future Technology, Sickness/Cancer/Illness, Heavy Angst with Happy Ending, First Person POV John, Pining John, Heart-Wrenching Angst) – I tell myself that next time I’ll come near this same place again. Wait around for the mysterious stranger in his coat to dash past me, hot on the heels of a new criminal in black. I think this all the way back to my Exit, planning where I’ll wait and what I’ll say when I see him. Scheming on how to get his name. It’s only once I reach the Exit Point door that I realize two hours and forty-five minutes have passed, and I realize that this won’t be the last time I Visit. It won’t be the last time at all.

The Curious Adventure of the Drs. Watson by ShinySherlock (M, 40,883 w., 14 Ch. || BBC & ACD Fusion || Victorianlock, Time Travel / Magical Realism, Friends to Lovers, Love and Kissing, Romance, Body Swap) – What if ACD Watson and BBC Watson switched places…  “Imposter!” Hands clenching the lapels of John’s coat, Holmes shoved him anew. “Yes!” John agreed, nodding, and then grimacing. “Sort of!”

Right Hand Man by SilentAuror (E, 42,031 w., 4 Ch. ||  H/C, Injury, Slow Burn) – When John’s left arm becomes paralysed after a car accident, Mary asks Sherlock to take him back to Baker Street to recuperate, as she’s about to give birth. Despite the fact that the search for Moriarty is ongoing, Sherlock takes John in and takes responsibility for overseeing his rehabilitation as he adjusts to the loss of his arm.

Guidelines by WithLoweredVoices (M, 43,018 w., 15 Ch. || Winglock || Angels, Fantasy, Angst, BAMF! John, War, Jealous Sherlock, Possessive Sherlock, Jealous John, Falling in Various Ways, Needy Sherlock, Wings) – The Good Soldier, one of the oldest and strongest of the fallen, is offered a bargain: to live as John Watson and to Guide a fledgling archangel so that he will stay on the path of good. Of course, Sherlock Holmes has different ideas about his destiny. Fantasy AU. Warnings for violence, occasional gore, and a whole load of hurt and angst.

The Soul Remembers by i_ship_an_armada (E, 43,636 w., 10 ch. || Oblivion AU || Post-Apocalypse, Movie Fusion, Science Fiction, Action/Adventure, Angst, Dreams, Bittersweet Ending) – John Watson is the lone security repairman stationed on a desolate, nearly-ruined future Earth. His dreams are plagued by a tall, dark-haired man, and when his dreams meet reality, he will be forced to question everything he believes is the truth about his life.

Albion and the Woodsman by Glenmore (NR [E], 54,437 w., 50 Ch. || Post S3 || Parentlock, Pining Sherlock, Angst, Family, Drug Use, Depression, Sherlock POV) – Sherlock and John are devastated after Mary Morstan makes her final moves. Sherlock relapses at the crack house, John walks around the world … and a lot happens in between. Parentlock, in the good way.

One Little Change by jadztone (E, 58,312 w., 12 Ch. || ASiB Divergence, Fake Relationship, Bed Sharing, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss / Time, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bi John / Gay Demisexual Sherlock, Switchlock, Alternating POV, Jealousy, Misunderstandings, Case Fic, Angst with Happy Ending, Emotional Love Making, Butt Plugs, Cuddles) – Our story begins right after John and Sherlock’s first meeting with Irene Adler in September. It splits off into an AU that imagines them taking a case where they act as bait to hook a killer targeting closeted gays in secret relationships. In the weeks leading up to Christmas, many things happen that have our boys wondering if maybe they have a chance with each other. Then Irene fakes her death on Christmas Eve, and things get a lot more complicated - especially since they still have a killer to catch.

The Great Sex Olympics of 221B by XistentialAngst (E, 58,611 w., 10 Ch. || First Time/Kiss, Experiments / Sexual Experimentations, Multi Pairings, Voyeurism) – John Watson thinks Sherlock Holmes should admit that he, Watson, is more of an expert on sex than Sherlock is. But Sherlock refuses to concede the point. He comes up with an experiment plan that will resolve the issue. The results will determine who wins the prize. But sometimes even the best thought-out scientific study has unexpected consequences.

Scars by SilentAuror (E, 60,493 w., 5 Ch. || Rape / Non-Con / Abuse, Gaslighting, Manipulation, Dub Con Elements, Homophobia, Angst With Happy Ending, Mary is Not Nice) – S3 rewrite, showing Mary’s manipulation of John as he realizes his love for Sherlock. Mary is not having it.

The Progress of Sherlock Holmes by ivyblossom (E, 62,006 w., 25 Ch. || First Person Sherlock POV, Pining, Angst, Slow Burn, Infidelity, Sherlock Learns About Himself, Happy Ending) – Sherlock struggles with his feelings for John, makes a mistake, and learns just how important he and John are to each other. Non-BBC Mary / John, but it’s a *complicated* relationship.

Being John Watson-ish by elwinglyre (E, 69,902 w., 17 Ch. || Bodysnatcher AU || Author John, Cranky Sherlock, Angst, Sexual Tension, First Kiss / Time, Falling in Love, BAMF John, Past Soldier John, Feelings, Inside Someone’s Brain, Shy Sherlock, Sherlock Loves John, POV Sherlock, Switchlock, Slow Burn, Internal Dialogue, Mental Turmoil) – When consulting detective Sherlock Holmes steps on one toe too many at a crime scene, he’s consigned to a desk job in an archaic office on the seventh-and-a-half floor of the New Scotland Yard. It’s in this bleak office that Sherlock discovers a portal into the mind of renowned author John Watson. Grander than his mind palace, this new wonderland affords Sherlock new vistas of experimentation. To learn more about the mystery behind the portal, Sherlock seeks out and befriends Watson. But then it all goes wrong when others find the secret portal door—including the man whose brain he visits.

The Moonlight and the Frost by CaitlinFairchild (E, 77,289 w., 10 Ch. || Case Fic, Post-HLV, Self Harm, Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Oral/Anal/Rimming, Romance, Angst, Mary is Not Nice) – John has to somehow rebuild his life in the wake of Mary’s betrayal and Sherlock’s deceptions.

Not Broken, Just Bent by Schmiezi (E, 87,585 w., 43 Ch. || Pining, Love Confessions, Torture, Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst, Villain!Mary, Suicidal Ideations, Main Character Death, Sherlock POV, Eventual Happy Ending) – “For a second, I allow myself to remember teaching John how to waltz. There is a special room in my mind palace for it. A big one, with a proper parquet dance floor. For a second, I go there. I remember holding him, closer than the World Dance Council asks for, excusing it with the fact that we are training for a wedding, not for a competition. For a second, I feel his hand on mine again, smell his sweat, hear the song we used. For a second, I allow myself to love him deeply. For a second, only a second, that love reflects on my face.” Fix-it for S3, starting at the end of TSoT. Evil Mary.

Two Two One Bravo Baker by abundantlyqueer (E, 114,574 w. || Military AU || Afghanistan, War Story, Thriller) – Captain John Watson of 40 Commando, the Royal Marines, is assigned to protect and assist Sherlock Holmes as he investigates what appears to be a simple war atrocity in Afghanistan. An intense attraction ignites between the two men as they uncover a conspiracy that threatens everything they’ve ever known, but Sherlock is as much hunted as hunter, and everyone close to him is in deadly danger. Can he solve the case in time to save himself and John? Part 1 of Two Two One Bravo Baker Universe

The Burning Heart by May_Shepard (M, 119,150 w., 27 Ch. || Canon Divergence, Post-TRF, John’s Sexuality, S3 Rewrite, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, POV John Watson, John’s Gay) – When Sherlock dies, John Watson feels like his life is over too. He’s completely shut down, until Mark Morstan, a new nurse at John’s medical clinic, catches his attention, and helps him uncover the long buried truth of his attraction to men. Although he’s certain he’ll never get over Sherlock, John plans to move on, and build a new life with Mark, unaware that Sherlock is not quite as dead as he appears, and that Mark is hiding secrets of his own.

The Adventure of the Silver Scars by tangledblue (NR [M], 142,458 w., 41 Ch. || S3 Fix-It, Post-HLV/ Post-TAB / Canon Compliant, Case Fic, No Baby, Angst, Humour, UST, Slow Burn, Angry John, Reconciliation, Not Nice Mary / Leaving Mary, Dependent Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Caretaker John, Fist Fights, It’s An Experiment, Virgin Sherlock, Dancing, Drugging, John Whump, Pet Names, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Scars) – It’s been thirteen months since Mary shot Sherlock and John finds he’s still pissed off about it. Sherlock had thought everything was settled: John and Mary, domestic bliss. But when John turns up at Baker Street with suitcases, the world’s only consulting detective might not be prepared for the consequences. A new case. Some old scores to settle. Certain danger. Concertos, waltzes, and whisky.

[camimcndcs]

i’ll look after you

TAGGING: KJ @itskjapa​, Cami.

LOCATION: Vancouver, BC.

TIMEFRAME: November 4th, 2020.

NOTES: KJ and Camila come together for the sake of their daughter after she comes down with a fever.

Cami: The past week had been a complete rollercoaster for both Camila and KJ. They hadn’t been communicating well and it had taken it’s toll. Overnight it seemed their relationship went from being about them to being solely about Talia. Speaking of their infant daughter, she hadn’t gotten much sleep the night before and when Camila had gotten her up this morning she was fussy and crying. KJ had been gone when Camila woke up, but he had an early call time which was expected. She was supposed to be on set later this afternoon, but Talia was really starting to worry her. Their daughter had hardly stopped crying in the last hour and Camila was reaching her limit. Reaching for her phone, the raven-haired girl called her mother in a panic when she noticed her daughter felt unreasonably warm. Gisel had tried her best to calm Camila down, trying to not make her freak out as she calmly explained that the baby probably had a fever brought on by a cold. The best thing to do would be to take the baby to the hospital and contact KJ on the way. Camila thanked her mother with a panicked smile as she rushed around the apartment grabbing anything she might need for Talia at the hospital. She called Lisa and asked for a ride to the hospital, explaining that she would inform KJ on the way and he could meet them there. The drive from the set was about 40 minutes so she made sure to call her fiancé as soon as she got into Lisa’s car. It felt like it had been ringing for forever when he finally picked up and before he could even get a word out she was rambling on. “Babe? Hi, um, Lisa and I are taking Talia to the hospital because she hasn’t stopped crying since she woke up an hour ago and she’s really warm, my mom said it’s probably a fever, please, just meet us at the hospital, okay?” she spit out in just a couple of minutes, hoping he was already on his way to finding a ride to the hospital. “Try not to worry too much, she’s going to be okay…” she whispered, holding back her own tears. Camila knew that not being able to be here with them now was probably killing him. “I’ll text you updates, we love you,” she whispered, the words already feeling somewhat foreign on her tongue which she hated.

KJ: Just as easily as autumn had settled over Vancouver, things behind closed doors had drastically changed. KJ had pondered on the situation enough to get headaches, but he was still as dumbfounded by the sudden turn of events regarding his relationship with Camila. It was as if one day she had decided to shut him out; their only common ground being their daughter. Although he was doing his best to keep a positive outlook, telling himself it was something most mothers went through the first weeks after birth, he was slowly losing such battle. Keeping up a good front was becoming harder, but there was nothing else he could do without fearing of worsening their fragile bond. Every day was a new prayer that she would find it in herself to grab the hand he desperately kept extending her way. His break between takes was spent as he usually did lately, looking at pictures of the two of them. Better times he kept longing for. It constantly brought this spurt of courage that died down as soon as he crossed the threshold of their apartment without any greetings from his fiancée -- unless she needed him to run to the store for diapers. The redhead was thrown off his walk down memory lane when her face appeared on the left corner of the screen, his thumb immediately brushing against the green button on the other side. "Hey--" he started, cut off by Camila who explained the emergency currently happening. Without missing a beat, he jumped from his chair, looking at Lili on his way out of the tent; who thankfully understood he needed to leave and went to warn the crew. "I'm not worried. You shouldn't be too, she's totally going to be okay." He breathed out heavily while racing to where his car was parked, door flung open before he quickly settled in. Phone still in hand as he reached out for the keys hidden in the sun visor. The next words she uttered made him pause and for a brief moment KJ thought he was probably dreaming them. Though his heart wouldn't be soaring for any other reason. "I love you too, Cami." he quietly replied, eyes brimming with tears as the emotions he couldn't contain washed over him. "I'll be there soon." All he left behind him was a cloud of dust as he sped away from the studio. Inclined to keep his word and be with them as quick as possible.

Cami: Hearing her fiancé on the other line brought a surge of hope to Camila's spirit. She knew that Talia would be fine, but bringing their tiny baby to the hospital was still scary. It was every mother's nightmare for their child to get sick. The raven-haired girl brought her free hand up to caress Talia's face as she continued to fuss in her car seat. "Drive safely," she whispered to KJ on the phone before hanging up, feeling some sort of relief when she saw the hospital come into view just a few minutes later. Lisa dropped the mother-daughter pair off at the front door to the emergency room, promising to be in as soon as she had parked. Camila took a deep breath before walking into the building, finding someone to speak with immediately to get Talia checked in. Lisa was entering the building when a nurse took Camila and Talia back for a physical exam to measure her weight, heart rate, temperature, and oxygen level.  The minutes seemed to pass like hours as the nurse tended to Talia before she informed them that they'd be put in a private room to wait for a physician. Camila sent a quick text to KJ to update him before taking Talia in her arms as Lisa grabbed the car seat to follow them into a more private area. She told the nurse that her fiancé would be joining them soon and the nurse promised to get him to their room as soon as possible. Again, the minutes seemed to pass slowly before the physician entered the room and Talia had gone back to inconsolable crying which was making it hard for Camila to stay calm. Taking a few deep breaths, she explained to the physician what was going on, and the doctor explained that they would have to do some tests on Talia to see what was really wrong. It could be something as simple as a cold or something more serious. Camila nodded her head in response, tears filling her eyes as she looked down at the little girl in her arms, hoping and praying she would be okay.

KJ: Drive Safely, Camila had uttered before ending their phone call, but KJ had been anything but safe while on the road. Wanting to be by her side and Talia's as soon as humanly possible. The traffic was busy as usual, but not enough to prevent him from reaching the hospital in record time. As if God had led the path himself and made sure there would be no obstacles on the way. As he rushed inside the building, he couldn't help but be reminded of the last time a similar scenario had happened -- except the circumstances had been more joyful. Yet still as nerve-racking considering they were both treading into new territory. This time, there was no one to greet him or lead the way, at least no one familiar, and although words rapidly fell from his lips in what he deemed as quite incoherent, a nurse seemed to understand him nonetheless. She was quick to reassure him as they walked down the hallway, believing their baby had surely caught a cold and would be alright. It's always frightening when it's your first, but you'll learn with time. He held onto those words and hoped she was right. "Thank you." he nodded at the older woman before stepping inside the room, his brown eyes settling on his fiancée as soon. Not wasting any time, he separated the distance between them and wrapped an arm around her frame while simultaneously caressing their daughter's face. Feeling for himself just how warm she appeared to be. "Hey, I'm here. Anything new? Did you talk to the doc?" he asked, pressing his lips against Talia's forehead. The fingers resting against Camila's hip digging slightly into the clothes she was wearing, resisting the urge to drive her closer next to him. They were both worried in that moment and she had whispered those three words he had failed to hear for a while; but he knew better than to assume anything. He would make himself available, but wouldn't force more than the current touch he was bestowing upon her as they both watched over Talia.

Cami: Despite the noise in the hospital, Camila could hear the sound of her fiancé's voice which caused her to look up, feeling a sense of relief wash over her as he quickly made his way over to her and Talia. "Hi," she whispered, the tears that had welled up in her eyes falling as he wrapped his arm around her waist and leaned down to press a kiss to Talia's forehead. "Yeah, um, they need to do a urine test and a blood test to see what's going on," she replied her voice shaky as she relayed the information she had from the doctor. Once it looked like the little family was settled, Lisa stood up and excused herself, letting the couple know she would be thinking of them and praying for a speedy recovery. Camila promised to update her as they got more news and then it was just the three of them, waiting for the doctor to come back to run the tests. Taking a deep breath, Camila handed Talia to KJ and then wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her face into his bicep as she began to cry. She hadn't wanted to cry earlier because she had needed to pay attention to everything the doctor was saying, but now that it was just the three of them she felt like she could finally let go a little bit. Camila had been holding in a lot of tears and she knew things were off between them, but she also knew that they needed each other right now to be strong for their daughter. "I hate being here, I know it's probably just a cold, but I hate being here and I hate that they're going to run tests on her, she's so small," she whispered into his sweatshirt clad arm. At least Talia had finally seemed to calm down in her father's arms, Camila was thankful for that, but she was certain the tears would come again when they needed to get a blood and urine sample from their baby girl. "How was work? Were you busy?" she asked, hoping to distract herself from the reason they were in this hospital to begin with.

KJ: There was no denying the anxiousness she was exuding in that moment — the slight tremor in her voice as she explained what would unfold gripping his fragile heart and squeezing tight. No matter how frightened KJ was as well, despite the encouraging words the nurse had shared previously, he knew he needed to be the strong one. The shoulder she could lean on and be her vulnerable self around; like a rock that wouldn’t falter. “It’s gonna be fine.“ he reassured Camila as his gaze ventured to her face. The long strands of hair in the way not being able to fully hide the tears that were clearly rolling down her cheeks. The redhead had been too preoccupied to even acknowledge Lisa in the first place, though he gave her a small nod when she offered to keep Talia in her prayers. Thankful for the alone time they would get as a family during this situation. “Hi, baby.“ He was taken aback when Talia found place in his arms, but not as much as when Camila used the opportunity to fling herself at him. Her warm breath tingling all of his senses. How he had missed having her this close — the warmth radiating from her body enveloping him whole. “I know, Cami. Me too... I wish things could be different. But we gotta see the positive in this. Once those tests are done, at least we’ll be sure. And we won’t worry as much.“ he whispered in the crown of her head, pressing his lips against her hair while the hand that was resting on the small of her back kept her close to him. A handful of minutes passed before she tried to make small talk, something he wasn’t truly inclined to but humored her with anyway while they waited. “Just the usual, aye. I was finishing a scene when you called... nothing that I can’t reshoot later though.“ Standing in the middle of the room, he almost forgot for a second about the circumstances surrounding them; simply basking in the two most precious people in his life. “I’m sorry I wasn’t home with you. But I ain’t going anywhere now.“

Cami: The tears continued to flow from Camila’s eyes as KJ did his best to reassure her. “But what if it’s not just a cold? What if she’s really sick?” she whimpered a bit, closing her eyes and trying her best to take deep breaths. She knew that she shouldn’t be thinking like that, but being here was making her anxious and Talia had never been so cranky and upset before. Camila knew that it was the only way their daughter could show that she was in pain or didn’t feel well, but it was still scary. “You’re right, you’re right,” she finally breathed out, smiling softly as his lips pressed against her hair at the crown of her head. “Your daddy’s got you, T, you’re in good hands,” she whispered to the baby, reaching out one hand to caress the little girls cheek. “Well, that’s good. Anything exciting?” she asked with a smile, trying her best to distract herself. “That’s okay, babe, you were working to provide for your family, I can’t be mad at that, you’re here now, that’s what matters,” she whispered, reaching up on her tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek. It was at that moment that the doctor stepped back in to administer some tests. She asked that one of them hold Talia during the process, because it would provide some sort of comfort to her. Once they’d done the tests, they would get her into a crib and hook her up to some medicine to at least calm her fever down. The doctor informed them that if things started to look better in the next few hours they’d let them go home with some more medicine they could administer on their own since the tests wouldn’t come back for a day or two. Camila pulled away from KJ and offered him the chair in the room, wanting him to be the one to keep Talia safe through this because she didn’t know if she was currently strong enough to. Moving behind the chair, the raven-haired girl placed her hands on her fiancé’s shoulders and gave them a gentle squeeze, watching as he listened to the doctors instructions for how to hold Talia during the different tests.

KJ: All KJ could do was hold Camila tighter against him, providing the comfort she was seeking while trying his best to prevent himself from following right along the negative thoughts she had voiced aloud. They were in the back of his mind, whispering softly but he refused to give in; instead keeping his brown eyes on their daughter as they both surrounded her with what he hoped was a sense of safety. Your daddy's got you. He wanted to tell his fiancée he was there for her just as much but swallowed the lump in his throat, afraid that if he pushed his luck in this moment, the spell would break. And then she would take her distance once more, leaving him feeling like an empty shell. Yet she surprised him on her own by being so kind and understanding regarding his absence -- something she had blamed him for days ago -- and as her lips came in contact with his cheek; a shaky breath flew past his own. The gesture so familiar and foreign all at once. One that didn't last as long as he would have liked it to and clearing his throat, he tried to get himself back on track. Finally answering the casual question she had thrown his way. "Nothing very exciting, nah. Just the same old drama in Riverdale, aye." A quiet chuckle followed suit before they were interrupted by the doctor, who immediately got his undivided attention. The redhead lost count of the number of times he nodded along as she spoke and settled down on the chair Camila dragged toward him -- indicating he would be the one to hold Talia during the different tests she would endure. "Is this okay?" he asked while holding the fussy baby against his chest, making sure one of his limbs wasn't in the way. The weight of his fiancée's hands as she placed them on his shoulders keeping him focused. Heavy and soothing; clearly still looking for the strength he had been supplying from the beginning while also sharing some of her own. They always worked best as a team.

Cami: Keeping her hands steady against her fiancé’s shoulders, Camila listened as the doctor explained that they would draw some blood from the babies heel and then put an absorbent pad into her diaper and wait a few minutes for her to pee. She spoke up to let the doctor know Talia hadn’t really eaten much this morning, so a feeding would most likely have to happen before they got her urine sample. Watching as KJ held their daughter against his chest, the doctor wiped Talia’s foot to clean it and then pricked her heel with a needle which caused her to scream out. Camila couldn’t bare to see her little girls face become red with tears, so she gave the redheads shoulders a squeeze and closed her eyes, willing the tears to not come. The doctor placed a bandaid on her heel and KJ turned the little girl in his arms to try and comfort her. At that point, Camila had sat herself next to them in a chair, ready to feed their daughter. The doctor instructed her fiancé on applying the absorbent pad to their daughters diaper which he did carefully as Talia squirmed on the table. When everything was secure, he handed their daughter over to Camila who undid her shirt, silently praying Talia would latch on and actually eat something or else they’d be hooking her up to more than just an IV for medicine. The thought of her baby laying in a hospital crib, hooked up to machines did not sit well with her, so she needed Talia to eat this way. As she felt their little girl latch on to her breast, Camila almost let out a cry, tearing up slightly at this tiny victory. “She’s doing it, babe,” she whispered, looking over at KJ and reaching out to squeeze his hand. There was finally a comfortable moment of silence between them as the only sound came from their daughter suckling from her mother’s breast. Hopefully she’d have a full diaper in just a few minutes and then they could get her hooked up to some medicine to slow her fever down.

KJ: Everything that was coming out of the doctor's mouth seemed way too complicated to understand the more she explained herself. At least on KJ's side, despite how much he relentlessly nodded along whenever her gaze would find him. Which is why he was quite relieved to see Camila interacting so easily with her, appearing to be very in tune with the process Talia would be put through -- although the grip on his shoulders was a reminder that she was trying her hardest to keep her composure. For once in what had seemed like an eternity, they were finally on the same page about something. His heart broke for the second time that day as his little angel cried harder than she had before, but all he could do was press her harder against his chest. Praying that the gesture alone would appease her in some way. The redhead had always been good at doing what he was told to and followed the instructions properly when he was asked to apply the pad; the confident motions a stark contrast to the expression crossing his features. There was only so many emotions he could prevent from taking over after all. "Roger, roger... we're landing on Cami's island. Happy boob, Miss T." he whispered under his breath as a small smile tugged on the corners of his mouth. The sound of his voice loud enough for their daughter to hear. He never ceased to come up with some idiotic sentences that he was certain would make her laugh one of these days. Watching intently when his fiancée offered the boob in question so she could latch onto it, a bright grin broke on his face as she did so -- the look on Camila's making it hard to do anything but smile. A beautiful sight that had been rare to witness lately. After a handful of minutes and two hands that had been unable to let go of one another, KJ was given the task to burp Talia. Which he did as soon, pacing the room slowly while his hand came in contact repeatedly with her small back. "You just watch, she'll have that pad filled out like a pro.”

Cami: The laugh that fell from Camila’s lips at KJ’s whispering as he placed their daughter into her arms was the first time she had laughed in a couple of days. “Yes, happy boob indeed,” she giggled, keeping his hand held tight in hers. When Talia finished eating, Camila handed her back to KJ to burp her. Watching as he slowly paced the room, gently patting her back to get her to burp. His confidence in their daughter and his more positive outlook on the current situation was good for Camila. Once Talia had let out a burp, she watched as her fiancé laid the little girl down to change her. The doctor had returned in that moment from dropping off her blood sample and was ready to take a sample of her urine if their little girl had actually gone the bathroom. Camila stood, standing by KJ’s side, caressing Talia’s cheek as the redhead checked she diaper. To their relief, it was full and Camila let out a little cheer, leaning in to press a kiss to Talia’s forehead. She still felt so warm which worried Camila, but she knew they were now on track to getting her better. Their doctor took the sample and then explained that a nurse would be in soon to hook their daughter up to an IV to slow down her fever with some medicine. Scooping Talia back up into her arms, the raven-haired girl stood waiting for KJ to wrap his arms around her from behind and keep them both safe in his strong arms. “Will you hold us?” she asked in a whisper, knowing he had been staying back to give her space if she needed or wanted it. But space was the last thing she wanted right now. As his strong arms latched around her waist, Camila leaned into him, pressing her back against his chest. Looking down at Talia as their baby girl let out a yawn. “You can take a nap once they get some medicine into you, baby,” she whispered, feeling instantly calmer in KJ’s arms.

KJ: Just as he had predicted, Talia had filled out her pad as nicely as possible under such circumstances, and a part of him couldn't believe they were so happy to retrieve what ultimately could be deemed as a dirty diaper. Though it would determine whatever illness she was currently taken over with and that was quite enough for him to get on board with the idea -- a slight fist pump accompanying Camila's cheer. The obvious stress that had washed over them would only find rest once they would be able to go home, but being reassured regarding the current fever would lift a weight from their tired shoulders. As they were once again left on their own, KJ nervously licked his lips, his brown eyes drifting from the two most important people in his life and settling on the floor. Now that Talia was back in his fiancée's arms, he wasn't certain on what he was supposed to do. She had been very hands on from the start, but he didn't want to assume she was still looking to have him close. The question she suddenly uttered in a quiet and vulnerable voice caught him off guard, but he was quick to react -- moving forward and slowly wrapping his arms around them. The redhead allowed himself a brief moment to breathe her in, so tempted to kiss the patch of skin that was so near and seemed to call out his name. But a light kick from his daughter brought him back from the spell he had been put under. "She's gonna be okay. There's nothing that can get to her-- not while we're together." he whispered, so certain of such statement. The medicine would do the trick and they would watch over her like hawks nonetheless; barely get any sleep as they'd act like the protective parents they were. "T is strong like her mum. Ain't you, baby girl? All you need is a little cocktail and you'll be crying for food and that cute pacifier you love so much. It'll be like nothing's happened." He could only hope that would be the case for the tension between them.

Cami: With KJ's arms wrapped tightly around Camila's waist, she felt completely calm. Closing her eyes as she felt him breathe in her scent, the moment was interrupted of course by Talia, kicking at her father's arm, but they really couldn't be upset with her when she was sick. As he whispered encouragement to them, Camila nodded her head in agreement. Knowing they worked better as a team, but still unable to fully grasp why her hormones had taken such a toll on her mood. She couldn't help but giggle at his next comment, brushing her fingers against their daughters cheek and leaning down to kiss her forehead which was still warm to the touch. The doctor reentered the room again at that moment with a nurse right behind her, wheeling in a crib and prepping the IV for Talia's medicine. Stepping out of her fiancé's arms, Camila stripped their daughter of her clothes and gave her another kiss, offering her up to KJ so he could give her a kiss as well. Holding her close as they got the IV into her almost broke Camila as their daughters cries filled the room again. "It's okay, T, this is going to help you feel better, I promise, baby, please don't cry," she whispered, trying to soothe the little girl as best she could. Once her IV was in, Camila gently placed her into the crib and turned towards KJ, falling into his arms as sobs wracked her body. Deep down she knew that this was good for their daughter and she was going to be okay, but the sound of her crying just broke her heart into a million pieces. It was also scary to see their daughter hooked up to an IV with other wires surrounding her. Burying her face deeper into his chest, Camila tried to catch her breath as he held her. She was so thankful to have him by her side through all of this even though tensions had been high between them. He could've just been here for Talia, but instead he was here for both of them and it was just what she needed.

KJ: After agonizing hours waiting for things to get better, they had finally be allowed to leave the hospital with a sleepy Talia by their side. The results of the tests they had put her through wouldn't be available until the following day, but the doctor had felt quite confident in her diagnosis when the fever had dropped down -- giving them a handful of instructions regarding the medicine they were provided with. The ride home had been rather silent, though the tension was still nowhere to be found. Their interactions were slightly awkward at times, mostly on his side as he wasn't entirely sure how to react. KJ never failed to follow suit in the end and take whatever she was willing to offer him, especially under such stressful circumstances. Camila had found place with their daughter in the backseat, wanting to stay as close as humanly possible. Something he couldn't blame her for, quite the opposite. Glancing back yet again in the rearview mirror as he came to a stop at a red light, he was surprised to catch her looking at him instead of the baby who had been under her very watchful eye as soon as they had gotten in the car. The redhead mustered a small smile, one that was returned immediately and animated the butterflies in the pit of his stomach. Despite the anxious and tired look crossing her features, she was still just as beautiful and he wished he felt confident enough to utter such words in that moment -- ultimately, he wasn't. "Should we lay down in bed with her when we get home? Or do you prefer something else?" he questioned with a tilt of his head, brown eyes venturing back onto the road as he moved forward in the direction of their building. Although he couldn't find it in himself to compliment her, he was brave enough to include himself in the scenario that would unfold at home. She had been in his arms too much that day for him to think she would want the rest of their time to be different.

Cami: Sitting in the backseat with their daughter, Camila kept her eyes on the little girl in her car seat, glancing at her fiancé from time to time. When he caught her eye at a red light she couldn't help but return his smile, thankful to have him as her rock throughout all of this. "You look so handsome today," she whispered, blushing slightly as he looked at her. Glancing down again at their daughter she nodded her head in response to his question. "We should definitely lay in bed with her until she falls asleep and then see if she'll sleep in her own bed. You're not going back to work?" she asked, hoping he was going to stay with them, but understanding if he had to get back to work. Even though it frustrated her sometimes, she knew that it wasn't up to him when he worked. She was lucky to only have to work a few days a week, but he didn't have that luxury. Once they arrived back at their building, Camila got out of the car and let KJ carry Talia in her carrier up to their apartment. She was thankful to be home, with her family and out of that stuffy hospital room with their baby hooked up to different machines with wires. The raven-haired girl was quiet as they rode the elevator up to their floor, standing close to her fiancé and little girl as she waited for the elevator to stop. Once it did, she stepped out, grabbing her keys from her purse to let them into their home. "It's good to be home," she breathed out, setting her purse down and walking towards their room. Camila immediately changed into one of KJ's shirts and a pair of leggings, crawling into their bed waiting for her fiancé to join her as he changed Talia's diaper and stripped her of her onesie to keep her cooled down.

KJ: Just as if they were still on the same wavelength despite the rift between them, the compliment she uttered caught him off guard -- his gaze lingering in the rearview mirror until the car behind them loudly made its presence known as the next red light they had encountered turned green. "Shit." he cursed under his breath, pressing his foot on the pedal and turning right when they reached the underground parking of Shangri-La. Making a fool of himself wouldn't probably work in his favor, although Camila had always seemed to find it endearing. Alas, things hadn't been quite the same these days. "Yeah nah, I sent a text to Roberto. He understood I was needed at home. I can't really leave you both alone..." he trailed off as they came to a halt in the reserved space, eyes widening slightly before he quickly spoke again. Afraid she would take his words the wrong way. "I mean, I wanna be with you. It's been pretty tough seeing T this way." Before he could say something that would officially dig his grave, he led the way to their apartment; their daughter seemingly in better shape than previously as she quietly kept her brown eyes on the both of them. Instructions had been given on their way up and it was dutifully that the redhead changed Talia's diaper, leaving her practically bare. Once in the bedroom, he smiled at the sight of his fiancée wearing one of his shirts and kicked off his shoes -- gently laying down their baby in the middle of the bed and finding place beside them. "You look beautiful." he breathed out, his gaze trailing over the sheet before confidently finding Camila's. "I wanted to say so earlier, but..." A light scoff tumbled from his mouth and the little girl became the center of attention once more in an attempt to save himself from embarrassment. Small steps would perhaps allow them to find their way back to better times. They could meet each other halfway with simple gestures. "Someone's gonna have the best nap ever, aye. Can't get any better."

Cami: As the car remained stopped even as the light turned green, Camila couldn't help but laugh as the car behind them loudly made their presence known and KJ muttered under his breath. Thankfully, the honking didn't disturb Talia, who was too busy rubbing her gums against her mother's finger. If they had disturbed their daughter, Camila was certain her mood would've turned sour rather quickly. As her fiancé fumbled over his words, the raven-haired girl rested her free hand on his shoulder, rubbing it gently. "I get it, babe, it has been awful seeing our little girl this way, I'm glad you're staying," she whispered. Following KJ up into their building and then their apartment, she could hear him babbling to their baby girl as she changed her which brought a smile to her face as Camila waited for them to join her. Once Talia was laid in the middle of their bed, Camila threw her arm over their daughter's waist to keep her secure. She gently caressed the smooth skin of the little girl's stomach, as KJ joined them in the bed. A slight blush crept up on her cheeks as he complimented her, watching as he again fumbled over his words before focusing his attention on the little girl who had stolen both of their hearts. "Thank you, babe," she whispered in response, making sure to acknowledge his compliment. At his next comment, she watched as a yawn fell from their daughter's lips. She was thankful Talia had been able to calm down and was now feeling ready for a nap. It was a nice change of pace from the crazy morning. "I'll let her fall asleep here and then we can move her to her own bed, mommy and daddy deserve their own cuddle time," she whispered sweetly, reaching over to run her hands through the redhead's hair. Things had been tense between them, but right now, all she wanted was to be completely wrapped up in his strong arms. The events of the morning had really worn her out.

KJ: Like for most of the day ever since she had called him regarding Talia's feverish state, Camila's words rendered him speechless -- the surprise crossing his features undeniable as she mentioned cuddling with him once their little girl would be asleep. KJ couldn't quite recall the last time they had done this purposefully. He had woken up wrapped around her many mornings, but usually because they were both inclined to roll over during the night; thus finding themselves in close proximity. Her mood swings, that were more intense than the ones she had graced him with during her actual pregnancy, were in the way each evening when he came home. He never truly knew what to say or do in order to make it better, preferring to give her the space she needed and allowing her to come to him on her own terms. It was all so frustrating, but today was the first time there was a glimmer of hope for them to get back on the right track -- for their fun and loving side to take over again. "Yeah, we do." he breathed out as the look in his eyes softened, his own hand gliding between them and resting on the small of her back; drawing her closer against their daughter. Closer toward him. The ticking sound coming from his watch almost drove him crazy as the minutes passed them by, the anticipation of the moment bubbling inside his being. There was nothing that mattered more than Talia being safe and sound, but the thought of being close to his fiancée was at the forefront and had been ever since she had mentioned as such. When it became clear their baby was fast asleep, the redhead tried not to appear too eager while he moved her to her own bed -- carefully laying her down on the mattress and backing away just as quietly. Yet he couldn't conceal the excitement he was submerged with as he plopped down on the space he had previously occupied and waited for Camila to separate the distance. One arm folded behind his head and the other spread out; inviting her in his embrace.

Cami: Watching the look in KJ's eyes soften warmed the raven-haired girls heart. As his hand came between them before resting on the small of her back, drawing her closer to him she couldn't help but smile. It had been awhile since they'd been like this. Once Talia had finally settled down and was now fast asleep between them, Camila watched as her fiancé carefully moved her to her crib, being extra gentle after the long day their sweet baby had to endure. Once he came back to the bed, she immediately snuggled as close to him as possible. Camila pressed a kiss to his shirt-covered chest before nuzzling her head into it for maximum comfort against him and in his arms. The air in Vancouver was only getting colder and she was thankful for his body heat that always kept her warm. "I'm glad you're home with us," she whispered, truly meaning the sentiment she expressed. Sleep was soon to take over her body, the day had been exhausting and she was ready for a nap, but she was also just enjoying the feeling of being in KJ's embrace. Talia stirred and Camila turned her head for a second, hoping she wouldn't cry or need anything. Thankfully, she remained quiet after that and then the couple was free to allow sleep to take over their bodies. Camila hadn't felt this at peace in weeks which she knew was noticeable to those around her, but there was nothing she was truly doing about it. Being here right now with her fiancé was all that she cared about, the morning had been quite a scare, but now that Talia was alright, she felt so much better. A quiet late afternoon nap was hopefully going to be the rejuvenation they all needed. She could feel her eyelids closing as she lay with her head against KJ's chest and she fell asleep quickly to the rhythm of his heart beating in his chest.