#bc i’m like i’m not in a board position anymore who gives me the right to do this thing | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

yoditorian · 4 years ago

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a law divine - 1

soulmate au!ezra/reader

this is solely the fault of one single anon who called out something i put in the tags and now it’s a whole universe but you know what?? it’s the love of my life. anon i hope u see this 💛 i also just want to say i know there isn’t A Lot of soulmate talk in this one but it’s important for the narrative okay bear with me

playlist // series masterlist // main masterlist

word count: 7.2k (a Big Boy)

warnings: swearing, my usual allusions to smut bc we keep things neutral in this house, brief food/alcohol mentions, 18+ please no babies

It might be the ugliest ship you’ve ever seen.

Not that you’re really one to judge, the one you charter out when you’re running point on a job is a mismatched patchwork of rusty panels held together with electrical tape and hope. If there’s the slightest possibility you might be a teeny tiny bit disappointed in it, it’s only because agency jobs are usually a little cushier. A little safer for once. You could do with a bit safer.

Your family might prefer a lot safer, but you’d sooner take your chances in open space without a suit than take a job working scrapyards. At least risking your life on digs gets a decent payout.

“You the danger mouse?”

It’s not an accent you hear often on the Pug, the majority of the station’s population is human, but you turn with a smile to meet the bright purple eyes of the Thanne. Armour-strong scales and sharp teeth, but he seems kind and mild mannered despite his clear predatory biology. You nod as you readjust the pack on your shoulders.

“I’m Iras.” He holds his hand out to you. A distinctly human gesture made a little awkward by the sharp edged scales and extra fingers, but you shake it nonetheless. He’s your captain for this job after all. You wonder where a Thanne became so well versed in human custom, the species as a whole tend to keep to themselves instead of branching out into the universe like so many others, until his crew members appear on the boarding ramp.

Iras gestures to each of them in turn. Summer, a blonde woman with dark skin and a kind smile, and Milo, an older man with a swirling tattoo above his left eyebrow that matches the navy blue of his eyes.

“Is it just us?” You ask. You could have sworn there was a fifth name on the manifest you’d been forwarded, but teams are always subject to change. You just hope you’ll have your own room.

“Ezra always leaves things down to the wire, he’ll show up right before we’re due to push out.” Summer laughs fondly, throwing an arm around your shoulders like she’s known you her whole life. You’re usually a little wary with brand new teams but the way she’s already chatting away makes you feel at home. The last agency job you were sent on got dicey, fast, somehow you’re sure the same won’t happen with this lot.

“There he is.” Milo leans out of the ship to point out into the docks.

You turn to see a man sauntering through the throngs of harvesters towards the ship, and it’s odd. The rest of the crowd seems to melt away as he closes the distance, even the weight of Summer’s arm on your shoulders feels not quite there. You take the moment to study him. He looks all business with his dark hair and his charcoal grey shirt and the neat pack slung over his shoulder, but his pants and boots have seen better days and the streak of blonde at his temple makes you smile. It’s nice to finally be with a crew without a single stuffy addition.

“It’s not often I get to congregate with like-minded souls.” He grins when he’s in earshot, a flash of something feline in his eyes. You don’t want to admit that you like it.

“Like-minded?” You tilt your head at him as you follow Summer up the ramp and into the ship. Ezra slips in behind you just as it starts to raise. Just like the others said.

“We’ve all got the same death wish, Sunspot.”

The launch, at least, is smooth despite the beaten up ship and it’s only about twenty minutes before you’re far enough from the Pug to punch a lane to the next system over. At least it isn’t far, there’s only a day between now and making planetfall. Somehow, you’re not surprised to find that it’s more of a barracks and bunk beds situation rather than each having a private quarters. Last time you were hired by the agency, you definitely got your own room. But it gives you a chance to chat with the others as you unpack.

Milo explains the air isn’t breathable, so he’ll need to double check to make sure everyone’s filters are running at capacity. But he reassures you that it’s a comfortable temperature, so it’s good to know you won’t be sweltering in your suits or freezing your asses off.

You pick the bed on the wall beside the door, taking out a few essentials from your pack and tucking the rest safely away in the storage compartment. Just as he did back at the docks, Ezra is the last to find his way to the room. He settles his things on the bunk opposite yours because the universe has it out for you, apparently.

“Did I hear one of them call you the danger mouse?”

You struggle not to roll your eyes at the nickname awarded to anyone stupid enough to do your job, although admittedly he doesn’t sound like he knows why. You offer him your name instead and pretend the way he rolls it around in his mouth doesn’t send a shock right down to your bones. You’re not in the habit of sleeping with colleagues, not until the job’s over at least. But you’d be lying if you said you’re not tempted.

“They call me in when a site’s unstable but too profitable to close.” You answer, tugging your sleeves up as the climate control settles to a comfortable temperature.

Ezra raises an eyebrow, waiting for you to continue, and you pull off your gloves. They land on your thin mattress as you hold your hands out between you. Not even the slightest twitch.

“Steadiest hands on the Pug.”

“So they are.” There’s a challenge in his voice that threatens to send a shiver up your spine. It’s clear he doesn’t doubt your skill in the field, but the return of that glint in his eye from the docks has you wondering exactly what else he’s thinking about as he studies your hands. It’s not hard to work out.

It’s been so long since you had to travel out of the system, you forgot how much inter-system lanes can fuck with the human brain. You’re half asleep for the thirty minutes you spend sorting your things for the morning, barely enough energy to change into the sweatpants and ratty t-shirt you call pyjamas, before you crawl into bed and settle down almost immediately.

Only you don’t get to sleep for as long as you’d like. The rest of the crew seem to have filtered in after you, the shift of sheets and snores float through the dimmed room. Except, it’s not just that. There’s shuffling and bed creaking from further down the line of bunks. A hushed giggle sounds in the silence and-

Oh god. Oh no.

They’re not. They can’t be, they- they are.

You’re very awake all of a sudden, eyes wide as you keep them firmly on the ceiling and wishing as hard as you can for an alarm to start beeping or something. Anything to get whoever’s banging Summer to stop. A deep voice hushes her when she laughs again. Iras. Knowing is somehow worse. The mechanics- you don’t even want to think about it.

You turn onto your side slowly, but loud enough to hint that maybe they should find somewhere else for their escapades, and fold your pillow around your head as a kind of makeshift set of earmuffs. Whether they’ve quieted down or it muffles the noise, you’re not sure, but it seems to have worked enough. You catch Ezra’s eye in the almost-darkness, much in the same position as he holds his pillow over his own ears.

It’s embarrassing for the both of you, even as you share a conspiratorial look. But somehow, it’s less awkward to have to hear Iras and Summer going at it when you know he’s awake. He winces when a particularly loud squeak echoes through the room, and it takes everything in you not to bust out laughing. You fall asleep again eventually, making faces at Ezra in the dark until neither of you can keep your eyes open anymore.

You’re surprisingly well rested come the morning, when the whole ship jolts as it punches into the system and you’re almost thrown out of bed. So much so that it’s easy to forget that you woke up at all until you shuffle into the main living compartment of the ship. One of the crates by the wall has been cracked open, Milo hands out granola bars for breakfast.

Summer and Iras are sitting in the same chair, feeding each other, and it might be cute if you’d been awake longer and hadn’t been woken up by their activities in the middle of the night. You slump into a free chair, face twisted in disgust for a moment. You’re pretty sure nobody else sees until Ezra laughs and drops into the seat beside you. They’re nice people, from how they took you as a friend immediately, but that doesn’t change the fact that it’s just a bit much for your perpetually single heart to take.

“It’s a week-long job, they can’t take a break?” You watch as they finally pry themselves apart to start, you know, actually working. But not without a genuinely gross kiss that definitely toes the line of public decency. Suddenly the half-eaten bar in your hand isn’t all that appealing anymore.

“Soulmates take no breaks, Sunspot. I’m sure yours would be hard pressed to be anywhere but in bed with you whenever they get the chance.” Ezra winks and it takes you a moment to remember where you are. A glance at the pair makes your new knowledge obvious, the way they seem to be touching, even now, on opposite sides of the room.

“I’m not sure I believe in all that red string stuff.”

Once the ship is safely landed a short walk from the site, the days you spend digging pass with ease. The deposit is a decent size, it takes all five of you to cover it completely, and the payout should be enough to keep you all comfortable for a little while even with the agency’s cut. The crew around you fill the time enough that you barely notice the week coming to a close.

Summer sings in the mornings as she cleans her equipment and readies her pack for the day. Miles talks gently to the cells as though they can hear him, shushing them any time he worries a gem might corrupt. Iras seems to have a secret superpower when it comes to the ration packs, they always taste better when he’s the one on lunch duty. And Ezra spends the afternoons regaling you all with tales of ancient beasts, laying eggs that fossilise into the very gems you’re harvesting. Although you’re not sure how true they are.

You almost get through the whole dig without a hitch. Almost. But aurelac is a tricky thing, even a change in the wind can turn a site for the worst. You’re all sitting around at lunch when it happens. The telltale smoke wafts up into the air for no visible reason at all and although you’ve collected enough to cover the quota, you’d still rather not lose viable gems.

“Get to what you came here for.” Iras gestures in your direction and you dive into the pit head first.

You’re not even sure you stop to think as you follow the harvesting steps at lightning speed, salvaging half the corrupted cells before someone tugs you out by the collar of your suit. The rest of the site starts to smoke the moment you’re out of range, spitting and hissing and rendering the rest of the gems worthless.

“Danger mouse indeed.” Ezra chuckles over the comm system, hand still fisted in the fabric of your suit. For once, the nickname makes you smile.

While you all go your separate ways after the ship has docked back on the Pug, Summer makes you all promise to meet later at a club you’ve only heard of in your friends’ messy night out stories. Still, you pinky swear when she holds her hand out to you and try to remember if you have a single item in your wardrobe that’ll pass as club attire. Or at least something that isn’t so worn there are holes in it.

Even if it’s a song he knows, there’s no chance that Ezra could recognise it with the volume cranked so high through the cheap speaker that everything but the beat is distorted. Still, it doesn’t stop people from dancing.

He’s a little late, as usual, but he doesn’t need to worry as Iras appears behind him and claps a hand on his shoulder, pointing to a booth across the room where Milo is looking increasingly uncomfortable.

It doesn’t take long for Ezra to spot you and Summer in the middle of the dance floor, as he follows Iras around the edge of the space to the booth Milo’s claimed. You’re both more jumping than dancing, yelling the unintelligible lyrics of the song into each other's faces. He can’t hear your breathless laughter as Summer spins you in a circle, smile wide and bright, but he can feel it in his ribs. The drums of the song kick in at the same time the swirling lights of the club light you up like some kind of celestial being, just as you catch his eye through the crowd. And everyone else disappears. The rest of the world, rest of the universe, fades into the background. Just like they did the first time he saw you, glaring suspiciously at the ship on the docks.

Summer’s dragging you back to the table when the song comes to a close, the both of you out of breath and laughing, and Ezra has to try desperately to remember how to speak when he watches a little bead of sweat slide down the side of your neck. And stop himself from just licking a line straight up it. His silent suffering only increases when Milo holds out a shot of the most potent alcohol the Pug has to offer and you down it without so much as a flinch, winking at him when you return the glass to the table for good measure.

Milo calls it a night only an hour later, clearly only having braved the crowds of the club to celebrate the job. Summer and Iras are tangled in each other on the dancefloor, or the booth, as they keep the shots coming. You, at least, decide to keep your wits about you, declining every drink after the one Milo had handed you. Nobody’s going to fuck with a Thanne, even in as seedy a club as this, so you don’t worry about Summer as she gets sloppier and sloppier. But there’s no spiky non-human boyfriend looking out for you down here, it’s just you and the knife you keep at your hip.

You pull yourself from the dance floor, eyes tracking the room for the missing member of your party, until you feel a set of eyes on you from above. Ezra’s leaning on the bannister of the stairs, his unflinching gaze set solely on you. And you can’t help but smile. You follow him up to the mezzanine without hesitation when he glances upwards and back to you. The buzz of the shot has mostly faded from your veins, replaced by something much more dangerous by the way he’s looking at you. The way he’s looked at you since you met him.

It’s not hard to spot your friends from up here, leaning over the barrier with Ezra to people watch. He crafts stories about every stranger who catches his eye. The man hunched over the bar in a beaten up jacket, the waitress who fiddles with her necklace any time her hands aren’t occupied, the pair of lovers tucked away in the dark corner on the other side of the mezzanine. You find yourself sliding closer to him the more he talks, wrapped up in the warmth of his voice even in the rundown club. Your shoulder knocks into his as you mindlessly bop to the music and listen to his made up stories. Utterly enchanted. It’s hard to remember a time when you felt this way with anybody, if you ever did at all. To tell the truth, it’s hard to remember anyone before Ezra. And neither of you have even made a move yet.

He's got his arms braced on the barrier, and you find yourself lifting the one closest to you so you can slip in between them. Surrounded on all sides and you couldn’t feel more comfortable. To his credit, he doesn’t falter in his vivid storytelling about the group now settled in the booth your crew had claimed earlier, not even a stutter as you turn in his arms to face him. He’s decided they’re here to celebrate the beginning of a new job, rather than a successful harvest. His eyes flick to you for the barest moment, enough to notice yours are firmly focused on the way his lips move around his words, before searching the club below for another story. Another way to keep his mind and mouth occupied so he doesn’t accidentally admit all the sinful things he wants to do to you when you press your ass up against him like that.

“Ezra.”

He shouldn’t be able to hear you over the music, but you’re nose to nose and he’d be hard pressed to ignore the way you practically purr his name. He’s expecting you to make another flirty comment in that voice that sends his mind reeling into all manner of indecent places the same way you have been all night.

“Can I kiss you?”

He doesn’t expect you to just outright ask him.

“Yeah.” Yeah. Hell of a time for his eloquence to fail, not that it matters anyway. You’re on him the moment he stops speaking.

It’s like the sun explodes inside him, the way his stomach bottoms out the second your lips touch his. There’s nothing soft about it, not the way he might have imagined there would be. If he’d been so bold as to let himself imagine what kissing you might be like. You’re all warmth and heat and you still taste a little bit like the shot you’d thrown back earlier, and he finds himself falling. Not that Ezra minds, he hopes his parachute never opens if it means you’ll keep kissing him like this.

You let your fingers roam under his jacket, twist themselves in the thin fabric of his t-shirt, and you sigh into his mouth. God, you knew he’d be good at this. His hands leave a trail of starlight as they trace over your body, never quite choosing a place to rest. They start to settle on your shoulders, only to skim down your arms and squeeze harshly on your waist, to play along the strip of skin he finds just underneath the hem of your shirt, to grip harder than he might mean to onto the meat of your ass through your pants. You gasp, break the kiss for barely a moment, and stop his apology in its tracks.

He doesn’t protest when you walk him backwards, still groping at each other like it’s just the two of you in the whole club. Ezra only groans when his back hits the wall and you push even closer into him, as if there was even any space left for air between your bodies already. He’s not about to complain. He could kiss you for a thousand years and it still wouldn’t be enough. It’’ll never be enough, not for a soul as hungry as his. You pull back too soon, far too soon, and it takes a solid minute for his brain to kick in and break the vice grip he still has a little too low for the public eye.

Oh, that look on your face. He’s in trouble.

“Where are you off to?” Ezra asks, flushed and breathless, a hand stretched halfway out to where you’re backing toward the stairs.

“Home,” You say with a sly smile, “You coming?”

He can’t push off the wall fast enough.

You don’t live far from the club, a ten minute walk at the most, but Ezra manages to make it a solid twenty with the way he keeps pulling you to him. Not that you’re about to complain. You’ve been waiting a week to let him get his hands on you. At the press of his lips on your neck, the shudder it sends down your spine, you wonder if part of you has been waiting even longer than that.

You’re trying, desperately, to type in the keycode to your apartment. If Ezra could calm down with the grabby hands, you might have gotten it right straight away.

“No roommates?” He asks, kissing along your shoulder, and you take the temporary reprieve to kick your brain into gear and remember the fucking numbers.

“Hugo won’t be too upset if I make him sleep on the couch.”

The door slides back into the wall to reveal a dark apartment, a strip of light from the hall falling on a very orange cat. He stares at you for a second, clearly not particularly pleased that he’s been so rudely roused from a nap, before he settles back to sleep stretched out on the couch cushions. Hugo. Ezra is silently relieved that the roommate is just a cat, he’s not sure he’s got the self control to stay quiet tonight. Or to make sure you do.

You waste no time once you gesture for Ezra to walk in ahead of you, flicking the switch on the wall to slide the door shut and pulling him back to your lips. He doesn’t hesitate to crowd you up against the cold metal.

Although you could devour each other until the closest sun explodes and swallows the station whole, Ezra has to break away. To think, to breathe, to tease you a little about the moan he just swallowed from you. But you beat him to it.

“Gotta catch your breath?” The smile on your face threatens to make his knees buckle, and with you pressed up against the closed door the way you are? He might just let them.

“What do you want, Sunspot?”

You left a lamp on in your bedroom, the door cracked just enough to let a little filter through to the main living space. Still, he’s almost completely silhouetted against the warm yellow glow. As if he’s some kind of ethereal being, maybe he is.

“Make me see the stars.” You pull him in as close as you can and let your lips brush over his as you whisper. His next words make you shudder almost as much as the way he drags the zipper of your jacket down, slowly, tooth by tooth.

“As you wish.”

And boy, does he deliver.

You’re expecting things to feel more unfamiliar than they do, as you explore each other for the first time, but it’s like you’ve been here before. Once, twice, a hundred times before. Every move feels oddly choreographed. Ezra knows exactly how to take you apart and put you back together again, the way he pulls every twitch and moan out of you so expertly. You’re no different, as your fingers map the plains of his chest like it’s muscle memory.

You shake it off, put the thoughts to the back of your mind. You’ve been around the block a little in your time on the Pug, it only makes sense that he has the same kind of experience. But shared experience or not, you can’t deny how much having him so close feels like a homecoming of sorts.

It’s the best sleep of your whole fucking life and, honestly, you’re not that surprised. Ezra makes a damn good pillow. Even if you both wake hours later into the day cycle than either of you normally would. Even if he’s more of a morning person than you are. It’s kind of nice, to sit still snuggled in your pile of blankets and watch him potter around your apartment as Hugo winds around his ankles like he’s been there for years.

Your fridge, however, is heartbreakingly empty and renders his offer of making breakfast pointless. Instead, he pulls his shirt on and offers to take you to the best little diner he knows, tucked away in the heart of the marketplace. It’s a hard offer to turn down.

“What kind of gentleman would I be to have so much income at my disposal and not treat such a beauty as yourself to a good meal?” He winks as he flashes his credit chit at you as if you didn’t scan in for your paychecks at the same time. You laugh as you empty a food pouch into Hugo’s bowl, and tell him he better show you all the good breakfast spots. You shrug off his raised eyebrow and mutters of a ‘next time’. As if he didn’t already know.

Still, Ezra takes you by the hand the moment your apartment door secures itself shut behind you, leading you through the hall and out into the street, and you’ve never felt more wanted.

It’s like everything’s brighter, walking leisurely through the bustling market stalls with Ezra. The smells are stronger as spices in the air cling to your nose, the cacophony of vendors calling out almost sounds like music, and you start to laugh. Hand in his, in the middle of the maze of stalls full of food and tools and trinkets. As if it’s just the two of you in the whole universe.

At least Ezra doesn’t look back at you like you’re crazy. He smiles too, just as big, and you feel bathed in warmth the same as when the sun comes out planetside.

You’re both still grinning when he leads you deeper through the market, down an alley and up a flight of stairs to an unassuming door.

“Is this where you murder me?” You joke just as the door opens to reveal a short older woman with an eyepatch, who pulls Ezra down into a tight hug as soon as he’s in arms reach. He introduces her as Merse, the woman who’s run the best diner no one’s ever heard of on the whole station. She slaps his arm for his cheek, but her grin grows twice as wide when she spots your intertwined hands.

Ezra pulls you through the doorway after him as he follows Merse, chatting about how she always keeps the best table open just in case he brings a friend and you try not to smile too wide when she wiggles her eyebrows at you. He says something to you, but you’re too distracted by the view from the big windows.

The far wall is completely glass, overlooking the main docks, lined with booths. A small family sits in one of them, their two children standing up on the seats to watch the ships come and go. You’ve never seen it from this angle before, always down in the masses and scanning the boards for new jobs. It’s kind of beautiful. In a rusty, patchwork sort of way.

Merse points you towards one of the booths with a promise that she’ll bring you the best breakfast you’ll ever have, something tells you she’s not lying.

It’s not long after you slide into the booth that she comes marching out of the kitchen with two plates, wafting steam that makes your mouth water and your stomach rumble. Rice and vegetables and eggs and all sorts of things you’ve never even seen pile high, and you’d worry you wouldn’t be able to finish it all if you weren’t so hungry.

“You know I won’t break, right?” You push your fork around in the remaining rice on your plate as you watch Ezra absorb your words. He thinks about it for a long moment, dark eyes over you before settling on your own.

“What’s this about?” He knows, you know he knows. More importantly, you know he’s going to make you say it. In the middle of the day cycle, in this family friendly diner.

“Just,” You exhale sharply, “Making sure you’re aware.” Your body floods with a shyness that��s alien compared to the confidence you had last night and suddenly, your breakfast is the most interesting thing on the Pug. You can practically feel him smiling at you, but you don’t dare look up to meet it.

He was right though, the food really is some of the best you’ve ever had.

It’s not until you’ve wandered back through the market, still hand in hand, and found your way back to your apartment that Ezra decides to bring it up. He may have been more than a little distracted last night, but he’s sure he spotted a set of old books sitting on a shelf above your couch. You freeze, ready to go on the defensive about how ink and paper will never be obsolete, until you realise he’s genuinely interested. He’s not judging you by any means. Something about the curiosity shining in his eyes makes your heart flutter more than you care to admit.

He could watch you talk about your books all day, every day, for the rest of his life. How your eyes lit up when you recognised his interest, a paperback lover himself. You can’t seem to stop yourself as you dive into the intricate details of your favourite classics, two or three hundred year old texts that make you feel like you’ve lived a thousand different lives at once. He wants so badly for you to keep talking but the more impassioned you become, the more he wants to kiss you.

You trail off at some point, he loses track when you climb into his lap to point out notes you’ve made in margins and the books lie scattered on the couch beside you as you kiss him until neither of you can breathe. You’re still a little achy from last night, deep in your bones, and you hiss when his teeth scrape across your shoulder.

“Won’t break, is that right?” Ezra chuckles darkly and nips at your jaw, “Can I try?”

“Please.”

You wake at the creak of your bedroom door, sometime in the early hours. Hugo noses his way through the narrow gap and hops up onto the bed, curling up on the unclaimed pillow by your head. Ezra sleeps deeply, face buried in your neck, and you let the warmth of him wash over you. It ebbs and flows like a tide, that familiarity. The undeniable fact that something about this just feels right. You’ve known this man a week and yet you’re here wondering, as he rests in your arms, if he might want more than just this with you.

Oh, but you are so afraid. Afraid to put a name to anything about him because what then? Will he tell you that you’re simply a placeholder in his life for something better, or that his heart might bleed through his skin when you’re apart? You’re not sure which is worse. Not that it matters, there is no word in any language that would be able to explain exactly how you feel about the man asleep in your arms. It’s enough, you think, to have him with you at all. In any capacity. Whatever pieces of his soul he bares as your breathing evens and his mind wanders. That is enough, and you will protect it with your life.

You have to part ways at some point, of course. Another week of rolling around in your bed sheets together, on the couch, on your pitiful kitchen counter, up against the wall, and Ezra gets a call from the agency. It’s a last minute job, the crew only need an extra set of hands to fit the safety standards, but it’s several systems out from the Pug. It’ll take him away for at least a month. You trail after him at the docks, with promises of messages in his absence and all manner of unsavoury activities on his return. It’s with a deep kiss and a wolf whistle from a couple of dock workers on their break, that you wish him luck. And ask him to hurry back.

Summer’s message surprises you when it dings through on your tablet. Some gajillionaire on Dallore T53 has found an aurelac deposit on the grounds of his new estate and wants it gone. She’s preoccupied, already out on another dig with Iras and a new crew. But it’s the kindness of her even thinking to offer it to you that makes your heart swell. It’s been a while since you’ve had real, honest to god, friends.

You’d go in alone, normally, for something like this. But now? Now, you’re punching in Ezra’s comm pin before you can even really register what it is that you’re doing. He only got back a week ago, and you made him settle in back home before he could settle in yours. It’s not like the two of you would be doing any resting on his return to your apartment, exactly. The job was a pain, he’d told you, it ran months longer than anyone expected and you’re sure he’s still exhausted. He won’t agree, but you find you have to ask. Just in case.

“Sunspot?” He sounds happy, rested. And you breathe a sigh of relief, at least he can follow your orders when he wants to.

Hugo snakes around your ankles at the familiar voice, the same way he does any time the man himself walks through the door. If you didn’t know that the little orange devil’s alliances lie in who feeds him, you might think he loves him more than you.

You explain about the job, make sure to stress that he doesn’t have to come. That you don’t even really need to take it if he’d rather you stay close by. Okay, you don’t say that out loud, but the smile you hear in his words through the speaker makes it known that he’s heard you. Loud and clear.

It doesn’t matter in the end, not when he accepts before you even have a chance to give him any details. You don’t know why you were so worried he might say no.

“Any excuse to be warmed by your light, Sunspot.” Hugo brushes up against your leg at the same time Ezra’s voice practically drips through the speaker, smooth as honey.

“Is that a euphemism?”

“Do you want it to be?”

You choke on your breath and he laughs like you’ve told the funniest joke in the universe. He’ll kill you one of these days, you’re sure of it.

You charter the ship you usually take on private jobs, the space a little smaller than you remember with another person on board, but it’s not like either of you aren’t used to being in close quarters with each other by now. At least Ezra has the decency not to be mean about the beaten up exterior, she still flies true. He’d grinned at that, told you how a rough outside often means the opposite of the interior mechanics. The glint in his eye is enough to know he’s not just talking about the ship.

At least the planet is in the same system as the Pug, so there’s no need to punch through to a lane. You fly in silence for a few hours, the familiar feel of the controls under your fingers as you guide it through the sky. Ezra’s eyes remain firmly on you although you pretend as though you don’t notice, and it takes him a moment to come back to the present when you ask him to flick a few switches and prepare to enter the atmosphere.

The coordinates the client gave you to land are only a short walk from the house itself, a great stone castle-looking thing. It’s kind of ugly, the way the limestone juts out above the treeline. A big white block among the rich reds and oranges of the leaves. They grow that colour all year round, perpetually stuck in spring and summer. It must be nice to have the kind of money to find somewhere like that and decide you’ll build a house there. The air is breathable, and a quick look at the planet file proves it’s never too hot or too cold. A perfect place to build a house really. Although, if it were you making that kind of decision, you’d maybe go for a design that’s a little less cubist.

The deposit isn’t huge, but it’ll be a good payout nonetheless providing the cells are all in good nick. You and Ezra wade through swathes of long grass and wildflowers until you find a spot to set up camp. At least you’re not stuck in bulky suits and having to lug around your equipment.

You couldn’t have asked for a more perfect dig if you’d tried. Each of the cells sit far enough away from each other that even if one were to fail, it wouldn’t corrupt a whole mess of the others. Although with both of your talents, it doesn’t surprise you when you collect every last crystal without a single misstep.

You’d told Ezra the profit would be split down the middle, equal pay for equal work. But it doesn’t stop him from sliding an extra gem into your pack to cover the ship charter. After all, you’re the one who was offered the job in the first place. He’s just following his heart, the one that walks around outside of his body and throws itself into deposits mid-corruption.

You hold one of the little gems aloft in the sunlight and watch as it sparkles.

“I used to think it was weird how rabid people go for these. But the more I dig the more I get it, isn’t it the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?”

Ezra tilts his head like he’s studying the rock, but his dark eyes don’t leave yours.

“It’s a close second.”

Sap.

Night falls before either of you realise just how late it is, clearing out the last few cells of the deposit. It’s not worth going back to the Pug now, he reasons, and you find it hard to disagree. The ache of the few days you’ve spent digging has settled deep in your muscles, the thought of having to run through docking procedure when you’re so tired is enough to make you wince.

You let him take you for all you’re worth under the watchful eye of the heavens, and find there’s more stars behind your eyelids than you could ever hope to see in the skies. It’s all you can do to cry out the name of the only god to ever make you feel this holy. Ezra.

He wakes with the sun, the same way he always has on jobs, to find you curled so tightly against him that it bubbles up from his toes all the way to his throat and he finds his eyes threatening to spill over. Everything in the universe seems to slot so perfectly together when you’re like this. Ezra sighs, content to never let the moment end. You are so beautiful.

He shifts up onto his elbow a little, still cradling you against him, and lets his free hand trail softly over your face. Tracing the shell of your ear, the curve of your cheekbone, the bridge of your nose. The dawn’s sunlight breaks over the trees and filters through the fabric of the tent, bathing you in soft green light. He could stay here, holding you, until the universe implodes. Ezra doubts he’d notice such an insignificant thing with you beside him.

But end it must, and he rouses you gently with soft whispers and kisses against your temple. You stretch in his arms, not unlike Hugo, and sigh as your joints pop and settle. Packing up happens slowly, moving around each other so naturally it’s as though you’ve done it a thousand times before. Every time Ezra passes, you drop a kiss wherever you can reach. His shoulder, the arm of his jacket, that little patch on his jaw. He pretends not to blush when you catch his hand and carefully press your lips to the little tattoo between his thumb and index finger, you pretend not to notice when he does.

You’ll be the death of him, he’s sure of it. The way you keep watching him out of the corner of your eye, the way your smile is so bright when he catches you that he can barely stand to look at it. With the tent and equipment packed up, his fingers itch to thread through your own as you start the walk back to the ship, there’s not a word in the universe strong enough to describe just how much he hates that both his and your hands are too full.

It’s odd, thinking about it. How you met by pure chance, hired by the agency just because you were on the same station at the same time. Would he have ever met you if you’d chosen a different career path, if he had? Maybe somewhere, centuries before or after this moment, where you’re meeting again. Different lives, different times, spanning across all of existence. Maybe, right here and now, you’re starting to feel the way he does about you. Just a little. Maybe he’ll get up the courage to ask what you think, how far you want to take things. He’d give himself to you in a heartbeat, without question. In a way, he already has.

Ezra can’t stop himself.

“What do you make of the red string of fate?”

“All you’ve seen of the universe and you still believe in soulmates?”

“Maybe I’m more foolish that I made myself out to be.” He shrugs, trying not to let his eyes fall to the little finger of his right hand. Trying not to clench his fist to show you exactly how much your disbelief affects him down to his bones, as though his soul itself is frowning. You’re smiling. Uncharacteristically quiet, but you seem appropriately pleased by his answer and stray a little further out into the long grass.

Curiosity gets the better of you.

“Can you see yours?” You have to call out across the gap you’ve unintentionally created, yellow stalks swishing in the breeze between you, and for a moment you’re not sure he heard.

Ezra looks at his right hand, at the thin red string tied neatly at the knuckle of his little finger, and follows the line as it threads through the grass to where it’s knotted at your left.

“No.”

TAGLIST (add yourself here):

@bee-dameron @keeper0fthestars @thevoiceinyourheadx @firstofficerwiggles @1800-fight-me @ew-erin @chatterbean @gotta-have-faye @freeshavocadoooo @darnitdraco @greeneyedblondie44 @fire-is-catching-always

#oh god here it is i hope it lives up to what i've made it out to be #a law divine #prospect (2019)#ezra (prospect)#ezra x reader #ezra x you #liz does words #soulmate au #smut

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catnippackets · 4 years ago

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It it's alright to ask, how do you work in the animation industry when you have ADHD? I'm a student, and even though I LOVE animating, I'm having a hard time learning how to focus on the projects I'm given when all I can think of is animating something I'm currently hyperfixated on. But I feel like, if I'm going to school for this (and won't really be able to afford going to school for something else any time soon) I'll have to go into the industry eventually. How do you do it?

o boy!!! serious talk time huh

short answer: it is really hard!!! I’m gonna be blunt here, it’s ridiculously hard. when I became a board artist I felt like I didn’t have a life anymore, and all the years I spent boarding just sort of blended together and I never had any time to work on my personal art and I felt awful. I thought that maybe the animation industry wasn’t for me, and I tried leaving, and getting a job in retail just to see if that gave me more energy, but that didn’t really make me feel much better so I figured if I was gonna always be drained no matter what I may as well do it in a nice office and get paid more lol

the thing that helped me was actually a combination of getting a life coach (who is incredible and has helped me SO much), finding a brand new project to work on, and taking revisionist positions instead of boarding positions. it’s not as flashy or prestigious or whatever but it’s way less stressful and I find that working on revs was great bc it allowed me to have all that time to get distracted and not be able to focus and still let me get everything finished on time without stress. and while working with this slightly different lifestyle, I wrote an entire 3 act comic book and finished a pitch packet for it, which is more than I’ve done in the entirety of the three years I spent as a board artist, so!

you just gotta figure out what works for you. I’m not an animator and I don’t actually think I have any friends who work as animators (we’re all board artists or layout artists haha) so I can’t compare that specifically but I know boarding is one of the most time consuming and irritating things to do and honestly most of the board artists I know including myself struggle a lot to keep up with the workflow. but that isn’t really our fault, no matter what studio you work at the production schedules are kind of inhumane so. it still makes me feel like kind of a failure seeing other board artists keep up with that schedule AND constantly knock out awesome personal stuff often, but hey. our brains work differently and we’re doing the best we can! if you have access, having medication to help you focus might really help you too

also, if you don’t get into the industry right out of uni, it’ll still be there for you if you decide to try again later. it is possible to break in without any formal training (although it’s a lot harder without all the connections you’ll make and the training you get in uni), so if you decide to find a different job and see what it’s like handling that while doing your own thing in your spare time before giving the industry a try, that’s perfectly fine. nobody’s artistic journey is the same! it took me a while to get to a place where I feel comfortable with what I’m doing, and maybe in a few years I’ll be struggling again, who knows, but it’s all part of life. I have faith you’ll figure out a way that works for you eventually!

#Anonymous #ask

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ialwaysknewyouwerepunk · 3 years ago

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Hi love, I'm the anon with the professor harry look-alike story

Sorry I took so long to answer. I forgot I had such a serious crush, so when I tried writing this the first time, a bunch of memories came back, and I started to ramble into details I shouldn't, so I stopped. That's why I eventually forgot, but I'm back and over the melodrama to give what you asked but with much more detail than I meant to lol. I hope you don't hate that it's a long post. Sorry again!

It's okay. It was/is legal, and we matched over a year later, so I wasn't his student anymore. idk if this is crossing anyone's mind rn, but I feel the need to clarify that I didn't search for him. The dating app doesnt even provide a search option; it was a bizarre coincidence.

We didn't go out. I was too chicken, and I'm glad it worked out how it did tbh. No regrets. I'm pretty inexperienced, even though I'm in my early 20s, and usually prefer older men.

I just told him it was unexpected and amusing but that he should decline and he said well that sends a mixed message and without much time in between, he did as I said. I'm not sure if he even remembered me but I guess it doesn't matter.

Won't share age but he's a little older than Harry even though he looks like he could still be in college. He looks more like adam brody when adam was on the OC show - it's the second post down (also a beautiful and sexy man), but I definitely caught glimpses of Harry, which made me do against my will double-takes at times. That one picture I sent with the parallel was an good example of when he looks more like Harry.

Oh he's also the same height as Louis and has the same small frame.

He's fan fiction worthy alright.

He started a band after high school, still writes music, and plays guitar. He used his motorcycle to get to work, wore leather jackets, dark pants, boots, and thin sweaters, which he mostly rolled the sleeves up halfway. He'd also wear those patterned button-ups that weren't so buttoned-up that we'd see a certain lhh wear.

let's just say he knew he looked good and knows how to dress

He spoke charismatically, has a Ph.D., and taught and still teaches(?) political science.

Suddenly human rights and politics are not just essential and intriguing but as sexy as that romanticized show Scandal lol

Many people had great things to say about him: he was fair, charismatic, and passionate, which is all true. Although in my mind, maybe as I'm too subjective, his passion boarded on a know-it-all kind of energy that was flustering to keep up with. Other than that, no complaints. He is a humanitarian, and those types melt my heart so it makes up for the know-it-all flustered thing. There were a few suggestive moments, but none of those actually matter. He was professional, behaved in a no-frills way during class, and would sadly only laugh sometimes. When he smiled/laughed, he looked exactly like 3:28

Oh shoot, I almost forgot the takeaway like what I learned because I got some life lessons out of this emotional ride. Suggestions if you ever are in this position: If you can, then don't have a class with a hot professor, not if you are so young/naive and idealistic like I was, it's totally not worth it. I mean, there are attractive people you don't think twice about, and then there are those who are your type. Learn to love yourself/be your own person before diving into the deep end and going wild card. At the same time, a little part of me still says, live your life, but trust your gut over me. I maintained a B but don't fool yourself. Not only is it distracting, so I had to teach myself the material after class, but the urge to be inappropriate is too strong lmao. I would say a quick thank you as I did with all my professors, but I always meant something more when I said that to him. Also, eyes don't lie! Larries of all people would know. So I had to do what Louis and Harry did: not interact or look at him much. I managed to fake boredom at times. Instead of nose scrunches or creepy lip-biting, just stay looking away.

you did not just link me to this moment. you didn't

and yes, adam brody in the oc is very similar to him in that photo you sent me!!! good-looking. to but it simply. i had the hugest crush on him when i watched this show back in middle school so yeah

oh, what a story. thank you, kind anon, for coming back and telling us the entire thing!!

it's definitely tricky being in that kind of situation, and he does sound like someone who could sweep you off your feet, especially as a student. the lessons you added are key to remember, bc it truly isn't worth getting into sticky business for anyone - let alone a smooth smart guy in his position.

i'm very glad it ended well for you! and i hope you find or have already found an alternative that makes you extremely happy <3

#kind anon #prof harry anon

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hobiwonder · 5 years ago

Text

crazy rich asians | 01

Genre: Chaebol!BTS. maid!reader. Smut, fluff. mild angst.

Pairing: Jin x reader, Jimin x reader, Hoseok x reader, Yoongi x reader. Possible future pairings.

Warnings for this chapter: language. brief mention of oral sex. Kissing !!!

Words: 9k+

Summary: You overhear something you shouldn’t. Now some of the country’s most powerful - and rich - men would do anything to keep you quiet.

a/n: i turned it into a fic as requested!!! ngl…. am worried how people will receive this lol. This will be a short series. no major angst so don’t worry. i hope you guys like it bc i really enjoyed writing it. please let me know what you think n feed my motivation bubble so i dont take months to finish this ajdubejekbfjk.

This was odd. Jin’s eyebrows furrowed – which he was strongly against since premature wrinkles were one of his biggest fears. He was closer to thirty than twenty so his concerns were valid. Jimin almost never visited his childhood home ever since their father got engaged to the secretary – another cliché – a few months ago.

“Hm… what changed your mind little brother.” Jin mutters as he passes the sleek Mercedes that belongs to his younger brother. Nevertheless, he can’t help the sly smirk that fights his muscles and spreads across his porcelain skin. He couldn’t wait to rub it in Jimin’s face that he finally returned when his bank account dried out. Most likely.

The plethora of house staff greeting Jin as he walked along the indoor fountain, trying to acknowledge most of them. They had too many servants and it wasn’t Jin’s fault that he didn’t care about most of them. But it was hard when they all looked so sheepish like they had some wretched secret they were supposed to hide but failed.

“Good Afternoon Sir, what brings you here?” Jin’s long legs are no match for the shorter man who usually took care of everything in the manor so he’s a little breathless as he Jogs besides him.

“To my own house? Where I lived for 20 years?” This really was becoming a strange day.

“A-Ah no sir. I meant no disrespect just wanted to be prepared to accommodate you accordingly.”

“Okay,” This was officially starting to annoy him and the furrow in his forehead was getting deeper. He would not get wrinkles because his servant annoyed him in to it. “Alfred… Anders… Andrew. Whatever your name is, I don’t need to announce my arrival at my own home. On second thought, maybe I should.”

The idea is very appealing as he swirls the thought in his head and it’s enough to make him forget the butler’s calls as he enters Jimin’s private wing. He isn’t surprised though when he already hears faint moans but not of a woman for once. It’s undoubtedly Jimin which is again – peculiar because getting off himself wasn’t something Jimin liked to do if he had ‘several other women ready to do it for me’ if quoting him directly. He guesses there is only one way to find out as he approaches the living area, looking at the back of his head resting on the enormous lounge sofa.

“Well hello there brother!” His tongue doesn’t form anymore words when he can finally see Jimin in his line of view – and his father’s fiancé frantically buttoning her blouse to retain some of her dignity. Jimin on the other hand is taking his sweet time tucking himself inside his slacks – shaking his head in disbelief as if Jin’s caused him immense grief.

“…and Amber.” Jin is no stranger to walking in on his brother – or friends really – indulging in all sorts of debauchery but this – this was quite interesting and to put it simply, messy. “Well, well, well. Did you come back to sleep with our step-mother or actually missed your family, god forbid?”

Jimin is no more rattled than a sloth as he runs his hands through his silky golden hair and smacks Amber’s ass as she’s still fiddling with her blouse. “A bit of both.”

“I-I didn’t know you’d b-be back so quick Jin-ah.” Her pearly white teeth that his father paid way too much for are almost blinding him. Yeah he’s not that bored today to play along with her games so he opts for just a dry smile. This was no surprise to him. Especially when the first person she had a fling with in this household was, well, Jin himself.

“Clearly. Thankfully you know father won’t be home until late. Run along now. I’ve got to catch up with your son.” Okay, that one’s on him. He liked to rub it in her face.

“Step-son.” She’s positively seething and Jin couldn’t be more delighted.

“Ooh. Naughty aren’t you? I knew you were always in a bit of incest.”

Jimin’s snort and Amber’s scoff come at the same time but at least it makes her on her way, heels clicking as she’s strutting away.

“I gave the staff one job and they couldn’t even do that.” Jimin walks towards the liquor cabinet, pouring himself a whiskey at 12 in the afternoon – bringing a smile to his face. He did miss his little brother.

“To keep me from finding Amber swallowing your unborn children?

“Thank fuck for that. I’m not ever going to be ready for kids.”

“Understandable. Considering you are one.” Jin’s shit eating grin makes Jimin pour another glass which he drowns in a second too.

“Please tell me how many ‘kids’ you know who’re worth half a billion dollars?”

Not a trick question.

“Almost all of our friends? Plus, we’re brothers you maggot. And I’m worth more.” His stance widens as he splays his feet out in some sort of power pose.

“What now? You want us sword fighting?” Jimin’s glancing to his crotch before he continues, “I’ll win because somebody didn’t let me finish.” Yes, very evident from the hard tent in his slacks.

“No need to resort to unsanitary methods. Talking will do.” He’s waving his hand in dismissal, watching Jimin taking a seat opposite – absolutely no attempts at hiding his boner. “So, what brings you back? Thought you were up in the Bahamas getting tanned and toned and weren’t due back for a few more weeks?”

“Correct but that was until father announced his surprise engagement.” Jimin is on his third glass of whiskey but looks more sober than a priest.

“Is there anything he does these days that isn’t a surprise? I found out I was moving houses from the real estate agent for god’s sake.” That makes Jimin snort out a laugh.

“Christ. He’s a bastard isn’t he?” Jimin had been in boarding school still when Jin had been effectively moved out of the manor in to a skyscraper penthouse because his father had wanted to ‘relax by himself and no kids’. As if he raised them on his own.

“Yup. Turns out he just needed the house to be snitch-free to fuck his secretary/future step-mom.” Plus he was still going through the divorce with their mother.

“I can understand why.” Jimin’s closing his eyes, heading leaning back again as a sultry smile spreads on his youthful face as if he’s reminiscing an irreplaceable memory. “Amber can make you forget you own name.”

“Right?” Jin is letting his inner, less sophisticated horny teenager alter ego slip through as he agrees with his brother about what a good lay their step-mom is.

“You already tap that?” When Jin just winks in Jimin’s direction, he’s clapping and chuckling like he can’t believe it.

“You’re no better than me brother and please, don’t take that as an insult. No offense at all.”

“None taken.” For a moment Jimin truly feels slightly happier. Looking at his brother and remembering sitting across from him while they talked about everything when they were younger and thought they had a chance at becoming people different than their father or their whole family. He had everything. They both had everything. There wasn’t one thing that either of them lacked or desired. So needless to say, their lives were a little grey and lacked excitement. Money though. That never failed to give him a hard-on.

Seeing his brother also made him happy, sure.

“Remember when we were playing in father’s office that one time he left it unlocked?” Jimin continues when Jin nods slowly, “And remember when we were rummaging through the drawers we found a safe and tried to break into it before Anderson caught us?”

“I knew it! He looked like an Anders.” When Jimin just blankly stares at him he mutters an apology and tells him to continue.

“Anyway. I went back and broke in to the safe.”

“Of course you did,” Jin is rolling his eyes but not finding it surprising that his little brother, ever the inquisitive little cat, went back to do exactly what he was told to notdo.

“No, listen,” Jimin’s eyes are increasingly growing frantic as he shifts forward, abandoning his glass of whiskey and Jin knew that this was something juicy. “There were papers inside the safe. Granddad’s will. I made copies.”

“Wait, you told me there was a bunch of cocaine and ecstasy. Nothing else.” Jimin shrugs once again to ask what was his point.

“And?”

“And you stole the papers but not the drugs? My teenage self hates you so much right now.”

“And that poor bastard should be thankful I looked in to the papers otherwise you would become penniless. Very soon.”

What was Jimin trying to say. “Get to the point Jimin. What about Grandpa’s will?”

Jin’s palms were becoming sweaty and a little tick in his left leg had already started and was about to become a full blown restless leg syndrome like a pathetic little office worker worried about losing a promotion.

“Well,” Jimin is moving across the room to sit beside his older brother, turning his lithe body to the side facing him as he starts to explain. “Grandad’s will stated that we were to receive 10% of our inheritance every year starting at the age of 35. Unless father remarried.”

The mention of money always sped up Jin’s heartbeat. It raced in his chest like he was about to win the lottery. Maybe he was?

“What then… ?” Jimin’s Cheshire grin slowly lighting up his whole face was never a good sign. Until now apparently.

“If he remarried before we turned 35, we are to receive our inheritance. In full. At once.”

Jin really felt like his heart would beat out of his chest. Because that was a lot of money.

“That’s-”

“$10 billion.” There was a slight pause as Jimin eagerly awaited his brother’s reaction.

“I think I just had a powergasm.” Jimin is chuckling as he slaps Jin’s back, shaking his older brother out of joy as they both start to gradually laugh louder. Is this how supervillains felt? Jin’s never laughed like this before and it’s no surprise that it’s money that’s doing the trick. Poor people wouldn’t understand.

That’s when another realisation occurs. “That’s why he kicked me out of the house. Because he was going to get engaged and couldn’t risk us retaliating and finding this bit of information out.”

“Precisely big brother.”

“Fuck…. We’re going to be rich as fuck.”

“If he doesn’t figure out a way to get that clause crossed from the will.” Jimin seems a bit nervous for the first time since he had started talking.

But Jin wasn’t. Not when he had people on his side who would love to make some money as well. Well, more money. He wasn’t friends with poor people.

“Don’t worry about it. You still in contact with Taehyung?” Jimin looks at his older brother with a ‘duh’ face.

“You still have a dick?” Jin’s just rolling his eyes as he calls the first number under ‘Y’.

“What?”

“Hello to you too, Min. Say, you want to become rich?” Yoongi on the other end is snorting before he speaks with his signature lazy drawl.

“I’m already rich, you bitch. But I’m having a down day anyway. Tell me more.”

Jin is smirking towards his brother, his body is buzzing and this is the most excited he;s been a while.

“Meet at my place with the other boys. At 2. Lunch is on me.”

“Yes because I desperately need someone to shout me lunch.” He’s had enough of Yoongi’s sarcasm so he just hangs up.

“Well Jimin, lets go get our billions.” Jimin hands his older brother a glass of whiskey before they make a toast.

“Amen.” Jin furrows his brows again.

“You believe in god now?”

“After seeing Amber’s tits? Yeah.”

“Oh hello there. Eavesdropping were we?” A man is leaning against the wall behind you, hands in his pockets while he looks at you head to toe, two small dimples appearing when he grins rather…. cutely you might add.

“U-Uh, n-no?” The handsome stranger is only shaking his head as he walks towards the door where the two brothers had gone in to only half an hour ago.

“Be careful next time little maid.” You hold in the scoff until he disappears inside the room.

“You guys have better discussed Amber’s ass and nothing else of importance because of the audience outside. The pretty little thing Anders hired.

“How does everyone know his name and not me? You don’t even live here Hoseok.” Jin’s scoffing while Jimin worries about the real problem.

“Fucking hell. The staff in this house is more loyal to our father than their own families. What do we do?”

“Leave that to me. Girls never kiss and tell when they’re with me.” with a wick, Hoseok is settling on the couch as well. “Just transfer me $50 million when you both get the money.”

Oh boy. Being rich was hard.

You were screwed. Or at least it looked like you were. Even though you'd been hired months ago - it was not usual to see the 'house Masters' (that's what Anders had called them anyway so you stuck with it). In fact you could count on one hand how many times you'd seen Kim Seokjin around the mansion. though he didn't live here so that wasn't too surprising at first but you did think that he would at least regularly visit his father. the numerous articles written about this family portrayed them as loyal as you can be to your own blood. What behind closed doors however, was a different story.

The eldest son rarely visited his father and his father, your employer, was even more of a rare sight around the Manor. In the three months you'd worked here, you'd seen Mr. Kim twice. And one of those times was when the annual Christmas dinner was hosted. But even for that, the youngest son, Jimin had not been present. So seeing the new face around the Manor today had confused you very much. But the way his perfectly sculpted features, luscious and shiny - oh god was it shiny - hair had told you that he belonged to this family. How close he was? You weren't sure. Until now.

Now that you'd been caught listening in to the scheming going behind the closed doors. He was the youngest son that was asked about a thousand times at the Christmas dinner and each time both, the father and the son, evaded the questions like experts. He was as handsome as the rest of the family so it didn't surprise you much when you found out his identity. Especially when the future house mistress had been lead in to the room by him, all smiles and charming demeanour. You'd naively thought that the step-mother and son - though she looked too good for her age as all rich people did - had quite a close relationship even though this was the first time you were seeing Master Jimin home. Until the moaning had sounded obnoxiously out in the hallway. Anders had tried his best to get to be anywhere other than cleaning the massive hallway that all the rooms connected to but in the end, you'd gravitated towards the noises. Knowing it was wrong for you to listen but not being able to help yourself. The young master's voice was so melodic, so serene, you were almost forgetting that the said noises weren't as innocent as the emotions they were evoking in you.

Your heart had sped up and your fingers had tugged down your uniform subconsciously at the erotic noises emitting from the room. Imagining yourself to be on the giving end of the scenario playing out in the room. But your fantasies had been broken when you'd hear Anders and Mr. Kim's older son's booming voice coming down the hallway. Quickly ducking back in to one of the rooms you were supposed to start dusting in, you'd only caught glimpse of the incredibly handsome Kim Seokjin reprimanding Anders for making him feel unwelcome in his own home. Though you felt for the poor old man. He was nice and looked after you more than you had expected. And the amount of work he had to see through was incredible and you were amazed at how he never failed to complete each and every one of his tasks. Except keeping Mr. Kim out of the young master's room that is. You'd heard the cheeky tone in Jimin's voice when he'd asked Anders to make sure that no one disturbs them. You'd thought stupidly that maybe they wanted to spend quality time with each other since Jimin was back home after a long time. And they spent quality time alright. The noises were a testament to that.

You were suddenly feeling the nervous butterflies in your stomach at the prospect of Jimin being found out by his older brother. And with his step mother no less. Like youwere the one doing something that scandalous. Craning your neck you'd tried to hear, maybe yelling? You'd assumed - wrongly, again - that the older master Kim would be horrified at finding out the debauchery going on inside the room but all you'd seen was a ruffled Amber - you think that's her name from the moans at least - and then joyous laughter which could only mean the brothers meeting. Rich people were bizarre. Did they not have any morals? Nothing settling uneasy in their conscience?

Not that you were any better because you were plainly eavesdropping and that was not how your mother raised you. Though she didn't raise you that much at all in all honesty. But she was quick to correct your mishaps or seemingly 'dishonest' activities. That was all she did really. Mostly your grandmother raised you until you were kicked out at the ripe age of 18 by your mother to 'find your own way' like her crack addicted self told you. She preached but never practiced her own self-righteous attitude more than when she needed to keep you under control. Though your visit down the memory lane is interrupted when your ears catch on to what the two men inside were talking about. The words 'cocaine' catch your attention - it was your mother's favourite at one point. Listening on further was just pure coincidence. But boy oh boy. What were you hearing? Were they going to possibly.... hurt someone for even more money? How much more could they want? They already had enough of it. You didn't realise the pout that had been on your face while you listened to the two brother calling a friend for some 'help'.

Not until someone was clearing their throat behind you, damn near making you knock your head against the wall you had been absentmindedly wiping for the hundredth time. Initially - for the millisecond of the reaction time you had available - you thought Anders would be the one to catch you and for some reason, you weren't as scared. Hence the sheepish smile on your face when you turn around to face whoever it was that had caught you so blatantly trying to listen to whatever was happening. Though your smile - as well as your heart - drops instantly when you see an unfamiliar face in front of you, yet again. And once again - the stranger is handsome, incredibly so. In fact, the toothy grin he's beaming your way is nearly blinding. His white teeth - definitely not natural, though you wouldn't be surprised if they were - smiling up at you as he leant against the wall besides you. How did you not hear him? His body was lithe and somehow you're not surprised that he snuck up on you so easily. Nonetheless, he did and you were in major trouble. He was good-looking enough for you to figure out that he probably belonged in the two master's circle.

“Oh hello there. Eavesdropping were we?” The man is leaning against the wall behind you, hands in his pockets while he looks at you head to toe, two small dimples appearing when he grins rather…. cutely you might add.

“U-Uh, n-no?” The handsome stranger is only shaking his head as he walks towards the door where the two brothers had gone in to only half an hour ago.

"No! Uh I mean. N-No... that's what I mean." You're hoping the desperation in your eyes gives him a hint that you rather not get in to trouble.

“Be careful next time little maid.” His smirk doesn't dissolve. In fact, it seems to get wider. Most likely being able to tell how hard you're trying to make it seem like you were doing the right thing. Definitely not eavesdropping. The handsome stranger is only shaking his head as he walks towards the door where the two brothers had gone in to only half an hour ago. Still watching you.

But alas, your mind malfunctions and the only thing you can think of is to get out of there. Too many good looking men you've seen to last you a decade. You're scurrying away back to the room you were originally supposed to be in and you can hear his chuckle even as you go further down the hallway to the room.

Slumping against the wall, your hand clutches just above where your heart should be. You were sofired. There was no way that whoever this was would not mention you lurking outside the room. Who was he anyway? Oh well, not that you would get to find out because you were stupidly caught eavesdropping. Eavesdropping! How cliché. It was impossible to focus on your work knowing that you will be in immense trouble. Pacing back and forth, rehearsing excuses and explanations to give Anders on why you were outside of your given area. And caught by a guest no less. From what you'd gathered about the older Kim son - he couldn't care less about your presence in the house.

One time he'd come in the living area, stayed for over two hours without acknowledging that you were even in the room. In fact, when Anders had called out to you to return to lend a hand at the kitchen is when he'd looked up at you as if it was the first time he was hearing a name that wasn't his own. Even then, he'd only looked at you for a mere few seconds before going back to the book he'd been reading.

But the newcomer - or old you guess, you'd only just started working after all - you weren't sure how he'd react to finding out your roaming outside his room. Surely, he would be just as aloof and uncaring of a mere maid as you, right? Maybe not if the handsome stranger told him about how well you'd been listening to the conversation inside. Oh lord. This was the only job that paid enough for you to send home and also keep a roof over your head. What were you going to do? You minded your own business but the one day curiosity got you was when you've been caught. Just your luck. Your mother was right. Your curiosity will be your end. And seems like it will be now as well judging from the sound of the doors opening from the young master's suite and several pairs of footsteps coming towards the room you were in.

Your limbs moving like lightning, making sure each and every one of the vases was picked up and dusted through thoroughly - it's obvious you're trying to look as occupied as possible. A few seconds later, the footsteps stop right outside the room you're in and your heart might as well have stopped pumping blood through your body as well with the way your temperature drops from the impending doom. Had they told on you already? Was Anders also outside the door? If he was alone you could've tried to weasel your way out of such a mishap but you doubt the you could even let out a squeak between the three intimidating men.

To your demise, when the men enter the room - Anders is nowhere to be found. The two brothers and the third stranger who had caught you stand in the doorway looking all too.... nerve-racking (for you). Instantly you know that theyknow how nervous you are. Nervous of losing the only source of income that was enough to sustain you. The older of the two brothers is looking at you up and down, slowly and calculating. Like it's the first time he's seeing you. Someone like you at least. Some who wasn't at the same calibre as he. Even his gaze makes you feel poor. Inferior.

Thought it doesn't seem to be intentional. He was inspecting you like you were an enigma when in reality he was the one clad in all sorts of bling you were sure you would only see in the movies. Being so focused and aware of Seokjin, you'd almost forgotten about the two other men in the room. While the stranger leant against the wall like he had earlier, Jimin had taken a seat on the large sofa a few meters away from you. Crossing his, muscular you might add, thighs. Getting comfortable with one of his arms splayed on the back of the cushions while the other rested on the hand rest - completely at ease. The exact opposite of you. While Seokjin was all curious eyes, Jimin seemed to be looking at you with sly eyes, blatantly checking out your frumpy uniform and the duster in your hand. The smirk you'd seen in the morning still ever present on his face.

Never having been in a room with an attractive man such as Seokjin himself - let alone three - you're about ready to faint.

"Are you boys going to start or shall I?" The stranger spoke first. Voice breezy like they were about to have a conversation about the weather with you.

your eyes must still be opened wide when Jimin speaks up. "Relax Hoseok hyung, let the girl breathe first. You okay sweetheart?"

His saccharine sweet tone instantly soothes some of the nerves and the smile he sends your way, the wrinkles appearing around his round eyes making you feel all warm inside.

"U-Uh, wh-what? Oh I-I'm-" The elder cuts you off however. Seemingly not being able for you to finish up your stuttering. Hm, he definitely wasn't as nice as the other two.

"Anyway, what were you doing outside master Jimin's wing, little one?" The nickname makes your face redder than it was, feeling your blood rush in your head suddenly. Never did you think that the sons of your employer would actually refer to themselves as 'master'. You definitely guessed wrong. At least Jimin hadn't. You reallydid like him better even if he was about to fire you.

And guess what you do next? Sabotage yourself even further of course. Your mouth has no filter when you're nervous because the words come stumbling out before you can stop yourself.

"I heard your plan to get money from your dad!" The words almost sound like a really long, poorly pronounced word. A breath leaves you in a rush like you' been holding it in for a while after your word vomit. "Or w-well I guess.... m-more money."

The last words are whispered almost to yourself but the way the men are now widening their eyes at you - you know they heard every word.

"Excuse me?" The handsome stranger - Hoseok, now you know - fills the defining silence with the most endearing laughter you've heard in your small life-time just as Seokjin's incredulous tone has you shrinking back in to yourself.

"And what do you suppose... you will do with that information, hm?" Jimin slowly gets up from his place on the couch, straitening his dress pants. The Cheshire smirk still upturning the corners of his mouth as he stalks towards you. Slow, with purpose, to undoubtedly make you more nervous than you were feeling surrounded by him and his older brother standing adjacent to you.

"I-I... I won't say a-anything." You're taking a deep breath before you say the next words - gathering all the courage that you were able to. About to do something you never dreamed you would have to. "If you don't f-fire me."

Even though you are outright blackmailing these chaebol brothers and with a witness present, you can't help the frown creasing your forehead at your unethical actions. Who were you blackmailing people that can probably have your existence removed from this earth?! They certainly had enough money for it.

"And if we do fire you, little one?" The screech that leaves your throat at the unexpected closeness of Seokjin as he leans his head down. Close enough that you instinctively take a step back as his deep coal orbs bore in to yours - challenging you to respond.

"I-I-I um," you gulp, looking anywhere but his intense eyes that won't let you breathe. "I'll tell y-your father!"

Your reply is defiant but nowhere near as threatening as you'd wanted it to be. In all honesty, you just want to keep your job. Seokjin's eyebrows shoot upwards at your feigned bravery and the bold claim. How would you even get in touch with his father?

You'd only ever seen him from a distance in person. Here's to hoping they don't call you on your bluff.

"Oh will you now?" His head tilts almost menacingly, still staring right down at you. The arms that come around to wrap themselves around you are purely in instinct. You were out of your depth here and desperately hoping they'd forget about this and ignore you. You were a mere house staff and a very lowly one at that.

Surely they won't fall to your words. This was stupid and you were doomed. You're about ready to apologies when Jimin speaks making your head snap towards him.

"Calm down, brother." His smile is then directed at you. "What's your name darling?"

"Y-Y/n." Your brain was on auto-pilot and you just wanted to be out of trouble.

"Well, y/n, don't worry." Jimin is close enough that you can smell his cologne. It smells heavenly and you almost want to sniff as much as you can to take in the smell while it's there. "Our mouths are barred," head leaning down just as Seokjin had been earlier, "as long as yours is."

Jimin was smooth. Slick and smooth with his hypnotic eyes, euphonious voice and tranquil words making sure you were listening. Comprehending every word. You're nodding along with him - actions a little quivery. Until another thought pops up in your head.

"W-What if h-he dobs me in?" Your head gestures towards Hoseok's animatedly in your nervous state. Completely missing the chuckle that sounds from the accused.

Jimin is biting his bottom lip, holding himself back from flat out laughing in your face probably.

"Don't you worry, sweetheart. We're all bounded in this contract. Deal?" He's nodding at you, prompting you to nod your understanding as well.

Seokjin is still scrutinising you, stepping back now that Jimin had taken over. You glance in Jimin's eyes before nodding once again - much more firmly.

"Excellent. Shall we seal this deal?" He looks around to Hoseok who just gestures with his hand 'as you wish' with a grin similar to Jimin's. It's like they're all communicating in some symbolic language that goes above your head. Seokjin doesn't respond but now stand besides Jimin.

When Jimin is looking back at you, a singular eyebrow raised - you nod as well. "O-Okay."

Hastily, you're wiping your clammy hands on your uniform to bring it forward and shake his hand. That's what he meant right?

The golden haired boy only smirks at your outstretched hand as his gaze falls back to your reluctant face. Your nerves are settling slightly when his arm is making its way to you as well - thanking god above that this was going to be over soon.

Until the said hands bypasses yours waiting to shake his and settles on the wall beside your head and your own eyes watch its descent. Before you can ask any questions or even make sense of what's happening, your head is tilted backwards slightly when a pair of voluptuous lips take their residence on your own. The noise of surprise leaving the back of your throat is the only other heard in the otherwise quiet room. Your hand instinctively going to grab at the arms caging you between them.

Jimin's kiss is all consuming, his lips gently sucking yours in the most unwavering embrace. Embrace is a bit of a stretch. While one hand had squashed any hopes of your escape, the other made it impossible as it held on to your face, caressing your cheek with his thumb as his tongue swiped over your lips. A whimper leaves your mouth when he does so and only a few seconds later, Jimin is pulling away with a wet 'pop' of his lips. His petal soft ones are moist and gently coloured with a natural deep pink.

You're barely breathing, eyes half closed when Hoseok has stepped besides the smirking Jimin.

"What a-"

"We're sealing it with a kiss, Darling. All of us." You felt like you were going to faint. Kissing one of them was this taxing - in the best way with the way the butterflies were going haywire in your tummy - how were you going to kiss all threeof them?

"I- Okay." You sound defeated and overwhelmed but ready to have someone fill the void that was left when Jimin stopped kissing you.

Hoseok has taken Jimin's place, swiftly pushing his head closer to yours, nuzzling your nose with his - an oddly intimate act - before his soft lips push against yours. Your arms have found their way to the top of his chest purely on instinct once more. Needing to hold on to something so your weak knees don't give out beneath you.

His kiss is more delicate than Jimin's. Much softer. Until he pulls back for the first time of course. Only to crash his mouth on to yours with a ferocity you were not expecting. Your hands are itching to tug on the silky strands of his hair but you resist. You're not sure if you should even kiss him back. What were you doing? Kissing strangers. It was a little too late to think about that anyway because there was no plausible reason you could think of at the moment to stopkissing him back.

"That's enough hyung. Let her breathe." Jimin's impish chuckle sounds from the room somewhere just as Hoseok's touch gets dangerously close to the curvature of your breasts.

He breaks away with a dramatic 'chu' as his lips part from yours. Sparkling from how shiny they were from your combined saliva. Jimin was right. You really needed to breathe before you fainted - especially with the way your knees wobbled, trying your best to rest against the wall behind you. Hoseok's eyes are still staring raptly at you, the knowing smirk still ever present. It briefly slips down to your heaving chest and even though the uniform was virtually shapeless - you felt almost naked under his scrutiny.

Evidently, your cheeks are reddening even further as he steps back, your heart skipping several beats and blood pressure spiking shortly after when you realise who was next - Kim Seokjin. Somehow, you'd expected the state of subtle arousal to dissipate to a certain degree. The substantial dislike you'd acquired for his tone whenever addressing you had been pushed to the side as he took his place in front of you. Your eyes lock, heart stopingly striking features making you breathless once again.

He, undoubtedly, intimidated you the most out of all of them. Eyes flicking back and forth between the other men and Seokjin, you're trying not to get nervous with each second that passes. Hoseok had not waited long enough to let the panic rise from deep down and you were thankful for that. Because nervous you was not appropriate. Not at all. But then again nothing about kissing your boss's sons and their friends was appropriate. You were way past that point. He places his hand besides your head, just as the other two had done. Bracing your hands behind you on the wall, you're ready for him to steal your breath away.

What you weren't expecting was the gentle press of lips against your cheek. A surprised gasp leaves past your - very lonely - lips. Trying to hide the disappointment that's trying to claw its way on to your face, you stay very still like moving even just an inch might be catastrophic for you. Just as soon as he kissed you, he's pulling away. You hadn't noticed his other hand that had been just shy of holding your waist - hovering besides it like he was uncertain. Which was a crazy thought to you.

"Nowit's a deal." Jimin speaks up from behind Seokjin. Seokjin's broad shoulders had almost completely blocked your view of the other two men in the room that you had momentarily forgotten about them.

Seokjin moves away just as fast as his little peck on your cheek. Which makes you wonder if you were that indigent to him, this unappealing, that he'd resorted to a little peck on your cheek. This was ridiculous on its own because your perception of reality was so skewed considering the events that had transpired in the past hour. A few hours ago you were getting ready to do your weekly thorough cleaning of the vast left wing - now you were internally pouting at not receiving a kiss from one of the three most handsome men you'd ever laid your eyes on. Not to forget - two out of three were your employers.

The realisation is enough to jolt you out of your thoughts and speculations, looking around at all of them. "I should go."

Your words are shaky, rightfully so with how much physical intimacy you received in the last hour than the last month. Neither of the three men stop surveying your tremulous tip-toeing towards the door, trying to get out of the stifling room that was feeling too small with all the bodies occupying it.

They don't stop you when you're fumbling with the golden doorknob, finally pulling open the door. Though why would this day get any easier for you, right? And what had you done in your previous life to deserve this.... predicament. Standing in front of you, was another man. That's right. Another one. Beautiful, incredibly so. He seems to be just as tall as Jimin, ivory skin with a healthy amount of flush.

"Well, hello... maid." His deep - puzzled voice sends shivers down your spine as you stare Bambi eyed at him. Why were all these men so, comically handsome? He looks just as puzzled as he sounds.

"Ah! Perfect timing Yoongi hyung." The loud, boisterous voice startles you once again, whipping around to face Hoseok while Jimin walks towards the newcomer.

"Is the another one of your role-play threesomes Jimin? Poor thing looks like she's going to cry. Unless you're a professional actress?"

The last question is directed at you as he looks into your eyes, his own lovely face frowning as he inspects your uniform. Before you can answer though, Seokjin is scoffing, taking a seat on the couch once again with the drink in his hand that he'd been pouring earlier.

"Please, I wouldn't be here if that were true. Come, have a seat. She won't cry." He waves his dismissal of you and once again - your face is heating. This time in irritation.

Yoongi just shrugs, eyes still watching you as he sits beside a lounging Seokjin who offers him a drink. "So, what's the little maid doing here?"

Jimin is smirking again as he looks towards his older brother. "Let me explain." he offers.

"Make my friend a drink, little one."

"Pardon?" Seokjin sighs, as if being greatly inconvenienced that he has to elaborate.

"Just because you got a few kisses from us doesn't relieve you of your duties, yes?" His narrowed eyes are condescending but you can't say anything. Because he was right. You were still a maid at their house despite the little stunt they pulled earlier (you were complicit).

"Y-Yes. Of course." Eyes downcast as you make your way to the liquor cabinet, taking out the bottle that Seokjin had previously to pour himself one.

"Wait, you guys kissed your maid?" Yoongi's unbelievable laugh makes the blood rush back in to your cheeks. They were discussing you like you weren't there and it was embarrassing to say the least. Though they definitely out-ranked you on the power spectrum so you doubt they really cared much about your input.

"It was a transaction, nothing much of it."

"Talk about yourself, mine was definitely more than that." Jimin is scoffing but you still hear the smirk in his voice. "Isn't that right, sweetheart?"

You know he's talking to you even if he doesn't know your name yet but you resist the urge to turn around, already too embarrassed at how easily you'd given in to their advances. Wiping your hands down on your uniform again to get rid of the sweat that's been accumulating, you carefully hold the heavy liquor glass. Hoping that it doesn't slip from your clammy hands otherwise you were in a lot more trouble than before.

Hands slightly shaking, you stop right before you reach the couch, bending forward to hand the newest face his glass of whiskey. You hadn't noticed before but all 4 of them had been watching you. Carefully examining your composure and the nervousness pouring off of your frame as you tried to keep your eyes on the glass. You make the mistake of glancing up at Yoongi and almost drop the glass like you'd been trying to avoid. Thankfully, he mercifully takes it from you - eyes still watching as he takes a sip.

"Sorry! Sorry..."

"That's okay little one. What's your name?"

"Wait yeah. we never asked her name." Hoseok muses from the opposite couch he's sitting on and Yoongi scoffs at them all again. But they did? Did they really forget my name already?

"Really now?" He's shaking his head mumbling 'egocentric fools' before his eyes turn back to you. "Go on."

Taking a deep breath. Wondering if you should give your real name or a fake one this time in case they try to have you fired when you're gone. You decide to be brave and tell them your name. Again.

"Y/n." No stuttering, thank god.

"How long have you been working here y/n? I would remember a pretty face like yours." Yoongi's tone is light, not flirty like his words suggested. He seemed like a person who just talked this way - complimenting people he deemed worthy of them.

"Three- Three and a half months now." Your voice gets quieter the longer your sentence goes on. The blush on your face is now permanent because of how intently all of them seem to be looking at you. you also need to fight the urge to shuffle your feet around like you were on trial for something bad you did and they were the judge and the jury. In a sense you guess that they were because you wouldn't be here otherwise.

"Hm. Somehow I'm seeing you for the first time today." You bite you tongue, wincing lightly at your own strength but you had to. Otherwise you would go on a tangent about how he really rarely looked at the staff in his own home. Seokjin just annoyed you! Biting on your lip - a nervous habit - you contemplate whether you should ask if you can go.

You were soclose before.

"Please, hyung. You would've if you stopped admiring yourself every chance you got." Jimin mocks his older brother.

"Not my fault I look like this." Seokjin is gesturing to himself like it's a great burden being that good looking. Then again you don't know. It could be.

"Settle down children." Yoongi rolls his eyes at the two brother bickering, checking his gold toned Rolex before speaking again, "so, what's this scheme I’ve been summoned for? Spit it out."

"That'll be all y/n." Jimin's charming smile is directed at you all of a sudden when Yoongi mentions the dreaded plan that you'd overheard. Nonetheless, the way your name slips off his tongue sends a small shiver down your spine, nodding at him before staggering towards the door.

"Don't forget our deal, little one." You can hear Hoseok snickering when Jimin calls out behind your retrieving figure.

Knees almost knocking into each other when you're outside the room, you let out the biggest breath that you were once again, unwarily holding. What had you gotten yourself in to?

Everything was coming crashing down onto your psyche. The gravity of the situation was settling on you and you could feel the hyperventilation lurking nearby. These were not just normal everyday people who happen to have more money than you. The Kim family was affluent and prominent. They didn't follow the normal dynamics of society like all the other wealthy and rich in this country. They made the rules that they wantedto follow. Remembering the incident from when you'd just started working here, you could feel your heart drop down to your toes.

It was your second week on the job and your timorous nature was taking a back seat slowly - getting a hang of your duties. Anders was kind and let you settle in and perhaps because you were just as old as his granddaughter he'd told you about. Minhyuk - another staff member that you'd seen around the Manor and quite honestly developed a small crush on - had been showing you the east wing and what your duties included. You didn't have much to do there as it was Mr Kim's quarters, including his study and office where he worked once in a while. Not everyone had access to that area of the house and you figured it was because of his work. maybe he was really particular about the way things were done. You just didn't think much of it.

"You will always be given your schedule of the type and duration of cleaning required the day before when it comes to Master Kim's rooms so please take note of that."

He smiles sweetly as he shows you around. The notepad in your hand, you're diligently taking notes because you did not want to risk leaving all of this new information to your forgetful nature. You swear you hear him mumble 'cute' when he's watching you but the sound of heels clicking on the marble floors distract you both. When you look up - your jaw is almost dropping to the floor. You's seen Mr Kim's partner a fair few times - on the news that is. In person she was even more... unreal. Tall, thin with equally bright and big bone structure. It didn't phase you when you learnt that she was indeed - a model.

"Good morning Am- Ms King!" Her pearly whites make a small appearance before she curls her lips in an almost sensual smile.

"Good morning Minhyuk. Who is this?" She doesn't spare you a glance when she questions, fingers lingering on his shoulder as she leans in a little close to him.

The blush lettering Minhyuk's cheek tells you that this isn't the first time she's been this close to him. He introduces you as the newest staff addition but she doesn't seem to be listening. What she does though is start to question him about his weekend. Making him almost forget that you're there. What does capture your attention meanwhile is the slight rustle - as if someone had walked away from around the corner. You're only able to catch the colour black and a suit comes to mind automatically.

"Everything alright y/n?" Minhyuk's voice makes you whip your head around back to him and you catch Ms King watching you as well.

"I-I just thought I saw someone." Ms King frowns at that.

"That must be Ryuk. Excuse me." She just smiles - one that doesn't reach her eyes as she steps away. Ryuk?

Sensing your confusion, Minhyuk answers your unanswered question. "That's Mr. Kim. His first name is Ryuk. Weird right?"

You just chuckle along with him - completely missing the underlying panicked tone. He continues the tour but after your run-in with Mr Kim's fiancé, he seems to be on edge.

The next day at work - Minhyuk is nowhere to be seen. Not the next day either. Then never again. A month later - you receive your new duties in the east wing. Minhyuk's designated area.

"Excuse me sir," Anders looks up from the sheets of paper he'd been handing out to the rest of the staff, "Isn't it M-Minhyuk's area? Am I temporarily-"

He doesn't let you finish. "He doesn't work here anymore dear. These will be your permanent duties until further notice."

Your heart clenches at his direct tone. He only spoke like this to you on your first day at work. He doesn't elaborate any further and you get the hint to not further question the change in staff.

You don't see Minhyuk again.

How were you so asinine that you didn't connect the dots before? Minhyuk's panic as he'd shown you to your duties after Mr Kim had possibly seen you three chatting with his Fiancé, him getting replaced - fired? - with you. He was simply removed from the Manor and you'd never heard his name from any of the other staff members either. It's like he never worked there. You were rapidly fading down the doomed rabbit hole. Already thinking of about a hundred ways Mr Kim's sons could have you disposed of. Maybe you were thinking too much? Not possible. With this family, anything was possible.

The tear that falls down your face has you bringing your cold hand up to your hot cheeks. Foolishly, you've forgotten to go much further away from the room you'd exited from. The panic clouding your senses as you fished for your phone from your pocket, hastily dialling your grandmother's house phone.

A few rings later, you hear your mother's annoyed tone. "H-hello Mama."

Her tone turns sickly sweet, dishonest you know but you try to trick your heart and your brain in to believing her concern. "Hi dear! Haven't heard from you in so long. Are you not at work?"

Her tone turns serious and worried instantly at the prospect of you not being at work. You also want to tell her that you called every two days after work but she never wanted to speak to you unless it was payday. But that doesn't hurt you nearly as much as her not even being remotely entered in your wellbeing.

"I am at work. Could you... could you put Nana on the phone please?"

"Um. Okay." That's it. your voice is cracking and you know she can hear you but she doesn't care enough to ask.

"Hello? y/n?"

"Nana." whimpering, you try to not burst out crying. Keeping the intense emotions at bay.

"What's wrong dear? Are you alright?" Hearing her perturbed tone at your distressed one only makes the tears fall quicker, making you slap them away so they don't blur your vision completely.

"Nana... I might be in trouble. I-I might get..." fired. You couldn't say it. Once you let her know you were a hundred percent sure your mother would be incessant in having her spill the bad news. She would make your grandmother's life hell and you couldn't do that to her. Your mother needed the steady money to keep her in rehab. You had hopes that since she was at least going to rehab - that one day she could be a good mother to you.

"What dear? You can tell me y/n." Pushing your hand over your mouth, you try and swallow the sob before it passes through the phone. Though you could already hear your mother asking your Nana what was going on.

"Be quiet Elizabeth! I'll tell you."

"I-I'm okay. I just miss you." You could do this. your grandmother didn't deserve this. No one deserved this just because you made a foolish mistake and you hope she doesn't question you further.

"We miss you too dear. So much. Will you be able to visit soon? Let her get back to work Ma." Your mother sounded angry and you wanted to scream at her through the phone that at least your grandmother cared.

"I'll let you know. I have to go now Nana. I love you."

"I love you too darling. So much." She stays on the line for a few more moments. Making sure you didn't want to say anything else.

Dropping your head down in your lap - you let the last few stray tears fall, trying to stay as quiet as possible. You needed to pull it together. Your family was counting on you to keep this job and you were going to fight for it. Even if you were several outnumbered. You had their secret and that should count for something, right? As long as you appeared strong in front of them - maybe they'll leave you alone.

Dusting off your uniform, wiping away at your face and checking it in the nearest grand mirror on the wall - you get to work. You still had a job.

What you domiss though, is the man who had witnessed your panicked tears. He hadn't expected himself to be this affected but the way his heart clenched and his hands curled into fists at your disturbed state - he'd never wanted to comfort someone this badly. Empathy. A foreign emotion indeed.

#bts #bts smut #bts x reader #bts fanfction #jimin x reader #jin x reader #jhope x reader #yoongi x reader #hobiwonder #lmk what you think #:)

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beware-of-you-98 · 4 years ago

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Hello yes u are an amazing human being and I just read your angsty Em hcs and they made me feel pain and I would like to feel more pain so... I’ve come to request Emily childhood angst hcs? Your headcanons are adorable and also your Jemily at the cat cafe was adorable :)

I’m about to create an environment so angsty (also i decided to focus on her coming out/coming to terms with being gay rather than focus on her childhood in general since i already had some hcs about it!! n this is au as hell bc i don’t care about canon x)

note: whoops this got long and angsty and way past emily’s childhood oops

tw: drug use, homophobia, abortion mention, drinking, smoking (ye i still don’t know if i should put a tw for that but i do anyway 🤷‍♀️)... yeah the first half of this isn’t happy at all

emily knows from a really young age she’s different

since she’s homeschooled up until she’s 12, her only other interaction with people is with nannies and the teachers the ambassador hires

but her only other interaction to the outside world is through story books

all the princesses in her story books want to be rescued by handsome knights or princes

emily always wants to be the one to rescue the pretty princesses

her nannies buy her disney princess merch and disney movies

emily’s favorite princess is belle or jasmine bc they’re so pretty 🥺

she doesn’t think anything is wrong with it until she’s talking with her nanny about how pretty jasmine is and her nanny’s only response is a short “oh”

emily doesn’t know why, but the way she says it makes her feel guilty and so she stops talking about jasmine

and when the nanny starts to talk about aladin, she barely pays attention

(she thinks jasmine deserves better than him anyway— aladin lies to her right away and how is that supposed to be true love?)

emily keeps her thoughts about girls to herself after that day

and compartmentalizes those feelings because she hates the guilt associated with them

it’s not until she’s enrolled in the all girl’s boarding school that the feelings come back and it’s almost too hard to ignore

every other girl talks about their boyfriend or guys

emily never feels the need to talk about guys; they hold no appeal to her

(she talks about guys once or twice to try and fit in, but her stomach always flips in unpleasant ways and she always feels bad because she knows she’s lying to the other girls and herself)

her heart doesn’t flutter around boys and they don’t make her feel anything

audrey from her chemistry class makes her heart skip a beat and butterflies to erupt in her stomach

her hair is soft, her laugh is so cute and everytime she gives emily a hug, she can’t help but melt in her arms

when she kisses emily in the woods behind the school, lips tasting of strawberry chapstick, it’s as if things suddenly make sense

kissing audrey makes emily feel like she’s finally found a part of herself she didn’t even know was there and it’s glorious

when the ambassador drags her off to rome, emily snaps

she goes off the deep end because, after all the years she’s been crying for her mother’s attention, it’s kissing audrey that makes her finally pay emily any attention?????

the school emily’s enrolled in is co-ed and she immediately clings to the first group to pay her any attention

she becomes a hardcore partier

she skips class

she smokes

does drugs (weed and on the occasion, ecstasy, but once her friends convince her to do a line of coke)

(she hates the way it makes her nose run so she doesn’t do it again)

drinks and gets blackout drunk every single chance she gets

the ambassador is a lot more present at this point in her life and emily starts fights with her every night

she doesn’t even know what she’s doing anymore

her life is spiraling and she feels hopeless

and when anyone, anyone, shows her any attention, she throws herself at them

she sleeps with one of her male friends once and ends up pregnant and suddenly her life comes to a screeching halt

she’s terrified and keeps it hidden from her mother

matthew is her saving grace and never judges her once

he even holds her hand when she gets the abortion

afterwards, it’s just the two of them

matthew has to sneak out to see her because his parents loathe emily, but he manages to do it

they always go to the local park and split a joint, a cigarette or a bottle of booze between the two of them and sit in silence

emily breaks down to him one night and tells him she doesn’t know what’s wrong with her

she feels so lost and doesn’t even recognize herself anymore

matthew holds her as she cries, silently comforting her

and when she asks him what she should do, he just simply suggests that she live her life for herself and stop trying to please everyone around her

“if you’re not happy living a life trying to please other people, try living for yourself”

while the advice might be cliché, emily swears its the best she’s ever got

she works her ass off the rest of her he years (i forgot what it’s called over seas oops) not bc the ambassador wants her to, but bc emily wants to do better for herself

when the ambassador moves her back over seas, she get accepted into yale

she doesn’t label herself in college and she’s comfortable with that

she only has like one boyfriend at the start of her freshman year

but she wasn’t feeling it, so she breaks up with him and starts to date her roommate

n then she goes steady with fiona duncan for the remainder of the time she’s in college

she immediately enrolls in the fbi academy when she graduates bc she doesn’t want to do politics

as soon as she’s certified, she’s assigned the undercover position as lauren reynolds

she doesn’t like to think about those years bc they’re just as confusing as her teenage years

she likes to separate herself from lauren as much as possible bc she feels as if lauren is the embodiment of the past she wants so desperately to leave behind

she barely looks back once she’s done with the undercover mission

she spends a few years finding jobs to keep herself busy

then she joins the bau

its the first time in a while she’s around people she genuinely enjoys spending time with

she’s comfortable with the team within a few months of joining

it’s here when she officially starts to label herself as a lesbian!!

(it feels so right to say she’s a lesbian— it sounds great coming from her mouth and it makes her feel warm and whole)

she kinda keeps it hidden at first but also kinda doesn’t

no one really asks until they’re all hanging out at te bar and penelope points to a group of guys and asks her which one she thinks is cuter

emily just shrugs and gestures to the female bartender

penelope and derek take her to gay bars a lot!!

and after some persuasion, jj and reid tag along

emily notices how jj kinda stays behind at their table instead of interacting with people and is like ???

but then she notices the longing gaze and the same sad expression on the blonde’s face as she watches everyone confidently mingling around and just... knows

when she drives jj back to her apartment later that night (they carpooled), emily finally asks jj what’s wrong

and jj just goes “do you ever feel like there’s a part of you that’s been hidden so long and all you want to do is just... let it out? but you’re too scared of what others might think and that you’ll lose so many people because they can’t accept who you are? but you don’t want to live that life anymore because you’re not happy and you just... don’t know what to do?”

it sounds like rambling

but emily’s heart goes out to jj because she knows exactly how that feels

emily tells jj the same thing matthew told her all those years ago— “if you’re not happy living the life others want you to, why don’t you start living for yourself”

jj just whispers “is that what you did? wasn’t it scary?”

emily tells her of course it was!! but she had a really good friend by her side to help make it less scary and that she’ll 100% be that person for jj if she wants her to

jj comes up to her a few weeks later in private and comes out as bisexual

she’s trembling and she’s nervous but emily just beams and tells her how proud she is of her

a few years later, they’re gfs bc i said so

n emily’s finally happy!!

she has people aroun her that finally love and accept her for being herself

and that’s all she ever wanted

#criminal minds #emily prentiss #emily prentiss hcs #long post #tw for a bunch of things #tw for drug use #tw for drinking #tw for abortion mention #tw for homophobia #tw for internalized homophobia prolly #oof #eventual jemily tho!!#the bau team #i’m too lazy to tag more #OOF #angst

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lesbeet · 4 years ago

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i’m putting this below a cut just bc it’s long but covid rant ahead ~~

this is probably the least effective place for me to write this bc (hopefully) everyone following me already agrees with me but i cannot fully express my absolute and utter rage at what’s going on in illinois right now lmao

like on the one hand i’m kind of lucky bc i didn’t manage to get a job this year, meaning i’m not beholden to whatever stupid measures various school districts are taking to increase in-person learning in order to get their students’ families to shut the fuck up, but on the other hand, i can’t get a full-time job in my chosen field because i’m fucking terrified to work in a school right now! my mom is already doing it every day and she’s the one who goes to see my immunocompromised grandparents like. at least weekly, and her boyfriend’s kids don’t give a fuck about the virus at all and she spends almost every weekend at his house. but that’s a whole separate issue

i’m just....our case numbers are increasing—they’ve BEEN increasing—and because a bunch of dumbshit parents are holding these ridiculous in-person rallies the school boards are like “ok fine whatever we’ll endanger our entire community if it’ll get you to stop sending me angry emails!” bc they’re spineless and fucking stupid

so the family i nanny for, the mom is gonna have to start working at school in person next week (at the school i’ve worked at for the past few years and student-taught at last year...but i don’t work there anymore bc i never heard back about the openings i applied for <3) and her son, who is in KINDERGARTEN, is also gonna be starting hybrid learning in the next few weeks. and it’s like...i trust the mom to be safe bc she’s taking this seriously, but i don’t trust one or two teachers in a classroom full of 5 year-olds to be able to keep everyone safe, even if they did take it as seriously as they should

and a lot of these hybrid programs are really just gonna be teachers having to teach half the class in person and half the class remotely AT THE SAME TIME, and yknow what’s gonna happen?? they’ll be less effective teachers for BOTH groups! because that’s a ridiculous ask! and yknow who’s gonna be blamed anyway? the TEACHERS! bc that’s who’s been getting blamed for not wanting to fucking risk their lives and their families’ lives just so some WASP-y millionaire stay-at-home wife won’t have to—g-d forbid—interact with her children for a few extra hours in the day (this district and the one my mom works in are made up mostly of wealthy WASPs; i know there are genuine reasons some children need the services in-person school provides, like childcare and meals)

and suddenly conservatives are soooooooooo concerned about childhood suicidality and hunger? it’s fucking sickening bc A) they seem to think “OPEN THE SCHOOLS!” is a cure-all for these issues, when in reality it just means they won’t have to see it as often, B) they’ve never given a shit about these issues before, C) whether or not you take covid into account, THEIR policies are huge factors for why so many children in illinois (and in the us at large, and in the world at large) are hungry and/or depressed and/or suicidal, and as such they D) they have no intention of actually addressing any of the root causes of these issues, like income inequality or, yknow, the impending end of the world

it like physically fills me with heart-twisting stomach-curdling RAGE seeing these talking points repeated over and over and these rich apathetic parents annoying the absolute fuck out of local school boards just to get what they want, regardless of like. science.

we’re coming up on our “third wave” and it’s all a fucking joke because if we’d just shut down for real back in MARCH things would be so different....but two half-shut downs and everyone’s like “we did it! go us! back to our lives now!” bc everyone’s tired of the restrictions but it’s only gonna get more and more difficult to keep placing half restrictions on people as more time passes. like i’m sorry i know a huge number of citizens won’t be happy about it but i’m ready for the government to come in and be like “okay you fucking morons, since you’re clearly incapable of not acting like immature children we’re gonna make the rules until you stop getting people KILLED with your apathy and selfishness” and shut down schools across the board. they need to stop leaving it up to individual districts bc this has all been so disgustingly politicized that more conservative-leaning areas are gonna want their kids in school no matter what’s actually happening

i’m just so tired i’m tired of losing faith in almost everyone i know and just seeing how absolutely uncaring the people around me are in a more concrete way than i’ve ever seen it before...like this isn’t hypothetical this isn’t a frustrating discussion about policy, this is nearly everyone in my surrounding communities being so brainwashed or so selfish or so stupid (or some combination) that they just simply do not give a shit about anyone but themselves, but who will blame EVERYONE but themselves if and when they have to deal with serious consequences for all this fucking bullshit, and meanwhile they’re pushing off those serious consequences onto people who don’t have the luxury of making those same choices because they can’t afford to!

i try so hard to keep a positive mindset about the overall trajectory of humanity but it’s like...................how. how do i continue to do that when this uninformed selfish apathy has been purposefully cultivated to benefit the ruling class. how do i fight against government sponsored brainwashing and propaganda and straight up misinformation. how do i convince people to give a shit about others like. we’re all fucking doomed man i don’t know how else to look at things anymore it’s all over

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alamhigyoooo · 4 years ago

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AS PROMISED - talk to me about your OT3!! ♥ I wanna know it all!! Does it take long before they are all on board? How do Raha and Aymeric get into each other? Does it start physical or are there feelings involved quickly? Tell me about their dynamic with each other and with Hallura \o/

aHHHHHOOOOOOOOO BOYYYYYYYYYYYYYY EVERYONE STRAP IN FOR A LONG ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! g’raha x hallura x aymeric is HERE

sticking this under the cut because i’m about to unleash an essay on yall about my ot3 but read on if you wish to find out more about them...

spoilers for 5.3!!!

so immediately after bringing g’raha and the scions back to the source, hallura has a total breakdown in private about how suddenly she has to live with extremely deep love for two people with BOTH of those people now very present in her life (for anyone who doesn’t know i had an extreme crisis about hallura’s endgame ship which i detailed, in part, in this chapter’s comment section)

to recap hallura’s love life until this point: she fell in love with raha and planned to propose to him before he locked himself into the crystal tower, and then during the events of heavensward started sleeping with aymeric as a coping mechanism. eventually feelings were admitted and they started seeing each other seriously in secret; hallura proposed at the end of stormblood and then they went public with their relationship after the ghimlyt dark. THEN hallura got summoned to the first and discovered her first true love who she definitely never stopped loving was alive and also was very much in love with her, and since then she’s been carrying a guilt over having feelings for two people and it’s been eating away at her

BUT YOU CAME HERE FOR AYMERIC AND G’RAHA’S ROMANCE...so let us begin :)

they actually get to know each other when hallura kind of goes awol on both of them; once raha was done convalescing (she stayed by him every day) hallura went back to aymeric and spent one night with him but was totally silent the whole time, and then the next day she was gone off to ghimlyt to deal with the threat of the sapphire weapon.

except she didn’t come back right after that, or after a few days, and only through the grapevine did either raha or aymeric find out that she’d then jumped over to gangos to help the bozjan resistance. aymeric actually took a trip to the rising stones in secret, where he was found by raha, and that was the first time they met each other...aymeric wasn’t sure what to think (i wouldn’t say he felt threatened but he was definitely uncomfortable) and raha was extremely embarrassed but secretly very enchanted by aymeric (catboy got MAD flustered over him he could 100% see why hallura would choose aymeric)

aymeric learned a long time ago from thancred who g’raha was, though i don’t think he realized how deeply hallura loved raha still, and when aymeric would pay visits to the scions post-5.3, alphinaud and alisaie filled him in on what happened on the first since hallura could never bring herself to, and piece by piece aymeric started to understand just how much hallura was probably breaking over her feelings

and meanwhile raha was dealing with his own internal struggle upon returning to his new body, wherein his more temperate crystal exarch persona was failing to overcome the more hot-blooded g’raha tia’s still-fresh feelings for hallura and in typical g’raha tia fashion he decided to do something extremely stupid and punish/restrain himself by ensuring he saw aymeric as much as possible to remind himself how he didn’t fit into the picture anymore...

it’s during this time (a few months i’d say) that they kind of just get to know each other...and i think honestly aymeric falls first? i talk a lil bit about it here; raha is super hopeful and positive and just everything that brings out the best in aymeric, and aymeric quickly understands just why hallura loved g’raha so much. he drinks big Respect Hallura juice, and even though it’s hard for him to admit, he agrees with her taste - raha is a wonderful person who has a lot of love to give, and pretty soon aymeric is like oh god. oh fuck. well. i guess we’re going in! (definitely inspired to be a little chaotic romantically because of hallura, but the chaotic bi energy was there to begin with)

raha’s a lot slower on the uptake re: self-penance, but once aymeric sets his sights on wooing raha it’s over for the catboy...raha is too much of a romantic and too SWEET to not just freakin swoon over a tall elegant dark-haired man actively attempting to Get Him. like aymeric he is also very much approving of hallura’s taste, but unlike aymeric he also denies himself hope - so basically we just have aymeric courting (discreetly) raha; the other scions are kind of surprised to see hallura’s paramours getting along so well in her absence but hey man if it works it works and better that then to have them fight yo

but all this time hallura is GONE like she just....she’s gone lol

she only chooses to return to eorzea (a HOT minute later) to break off her engagement with aymeric because she was so so guilty about loving raha still - but she didn’t break it off to leave for raha. she’s determined to give up on relationships altogether and just be single for the rest of her life because she’s certain she’ll never get over either of them, but neither of them deserve to live in what SHE thinks is limbo while she fights her own feelings.

so surprise surprise when she returns and finds both aymeric and g’raha absolutely chilling with each other in ishgard at the borel manor and they’re both reading by the fireplace and she comes in and sees them and they’re both so so happy to see her, and her perfectly rehearsed rejection just evaporates from her mind and she tries to run away again because this has to be some kind of sick joke -

in this ot3 i attribue most of the communication to aymeric, and he, while thrilled to see her again, straight up is like “no you sit down we’re having a talk right now” and she confesses on the spot she has to leave him and can’t be engaged to him because it’s not fair to him that she’ll never get over raha - which is ALSO a confession to raha that she still loves him (and let’s be real it was clear that she did but g’raha is a river in egypt called de nile and never let himself believe it)

there’s a lot of crying involved; aymeric is obviously upset because he doesn’t want to not be engaged to hallura, and he tells her on the spot that she can’t do that because that’s not fair, and all he wants is for them to talk to each other, and they’re both kneeling on the floor and he’s clutching her shoulders and that’s when raha just gently touches both of them and says he’ll just leave...it’s his fault they’re falling apart like this

and both hallura and aymeric both ADAMANTLY say “NO!” and latch onto him, and then all three of them are crying on the floor and there’s lots of apologies and none of them really know how much time has passed, but eventually they cry themselves out and it ends with hallura’s head in aymeric’s lap and she’s holding raha’s hand and aymeric and raha are sitting beside each other...raha is so exhausted he’s leaning against aymeric’s shoulder

and hallura breaks the silence after a while and says “so where do we go now?” because it’s very obvious that there is no going back to the way things were, and that’s when aymeric clears his throat and admits (with embarrassment) that he’d be open to trying something with all three of them

raha is like Excuse me? and hallura sits up bc what the heck has she missed, and aymeric then admits further that he’s caught feelings for raha and has even slightly been trying to court raha...much to raha’s embarrassment he’s like “you were WHAT? so i wasn’t just imagining it?”

and hallura is like...she can’t even be mad because a) that’s exactly her own dilemma and b) that’s also really hot,,, but while she would be happy to do it everything hinges on g’raha’s consent; and it takes raha a moment to process but honestly when presented with two open hands waiting for him (him, not just any third party) he cannot help but take them with a smile. and i think this is really important for g’raha because hallura and aymeric BOTH actively express interest in HIM, for who he is, there is room in the relationship that can only be filled by raha, and raha is someone who wants so very desperately to belong.

so of course he says yes, and that’s how the ot3 is really born. there’s some more talking about things - living arrangements, scolding hallura for ghosting them for like 3 months, what the heck are they gonna tell the scions - but eventually they settle on a three-way engagement of sorts, and they’re all going to have matching rings and other cute bs

they are very much founded on feelings first!!!!!!! hallura might be the biggest thot in the world who actively makes aymeric into a thot as well but to me there is no way they could have survived as a functioning ot3 if it was not based in emotion. raha is too in his head and aymeric is too much of a thinker for something purely physical to last, imo.

...that is not to say, however, that they aren’t physically compatible - they are most definitely physically compatible. (for content sake i shall keep this post sfw but if you were to send an nsfw ask...i’m just saying i will definitely answer 👀)

dynamic wise (and this is where i get meta, the characters fall into these roles without necessarily realizing it themselves LOL i love being the writer) the ot3 can be summed up like this:

aymeric: the thinker (left brain LOL)

raha: the dreamer (right brain LDKJGLSKJD)

hallura: the heart

raha & aymeric represent the rationality of the relationship and do a lot of talking, a lot of planning, and a lot of smiling together. they’re the leaders, so it’s in their nature to have a game-plan for things. raha inspires the best in aymeric: his enthusiasm is infectious and really stokes aymeric’s determination, and aymeric draws a lot of strength and inspiration from raha’s own knowledge as a leader that coexists with his belief that mankind is worth saving. there is an EXTREMELY healthy amount of mutual respect here, and these two are absolutely the “romantic looks over papers that they could honestly care less about” plus aymeric finds raha’s allagan nerding ADORABLE; raha is just absolutely smitten with how charming aymeric is and very much admires his determination to overcome the obstacles set against him, and how aymeric loves his people despite ishgard’s very prominent flaws.

hallura & raha represent the spontaneity of the relationship - they don’t let their feelings control them per se, but they’re the ones who really say “screw restraint” and push the relationship into the unknown - exploring new parts of the relationship, experiencing the world together, excitement for growth and change. these two are allergic to stagnation and are constantly striving to be dynamic (in my piece “fade” i touch on how i think raha’s controlled crystal exarch persona gives way to his younger, more carefree self, in a good way) and they serve very much as the relationship’s “light”, which is not to say that aymeric is not bright for them, but hallura and raha are more like the sun as aymeric is like the moon. these two are the “batteries” of the relationship and keep things exciting and fresh.

hallura & aymeric represent the confidence and assuredness of the relationship - they have spent a LOT of time together already and have a very good grasp on what they like, what they want, etc. they are both quite confident in themselves and they uplift raha from his insecurities to show him just how much he’s worth. when confronted with outside criticism or scorn these two are the ones who stand their ground; they have the experience to show for their commitment and they’re very much teachers in the way that raha is still a learner. they are also the comforters - aymeric is very good at soothing, and hallura is very good at talking someone’s ear off to help them feel better LOL these two are the romantically matured ones and they set the example for give and take of the relationship.

it’s not always perfect, there are definitely spats and each has their notable quirks. hallura is the fighter, and if she doesn’t understand something she’ll call it out or say something, and that can be a little abrasive; raha has a lot of self-confidence issues and has trouble vocalizing his needs, which leads to some miscommunications at the start; and aymeric has a tendency to ice people out when he’s upset and while he’s the logical one he is also the one who remembers stuff - THIS is the grudge holder LMAOSDKJFLLGLHSLDKFGLJ

but all in all i think they balance each other out relatively well! i will admit that i worked really hard to find a dynamic that worked realistically for them - i was terrified of just slamming them together because it was “easier”. i told myself if i was going to write an ot3 i was going to do it justice, and besides the relationship dynamics are just that much more fun to write especially for someone like me who delights in exploring the details of every interaction LOL

i hope you enjoyed!!!! this got REALLY LONG god i am so sorry sdfklgljsldkfglj please always feel free to send me ot3 asks i will COMBUST and then write a dissertation in reply LMAO

#ask #thank you for this ask THANK YOU FOR ENABLING ME #about hallura #wol x g'raha tia x aymeric de borel #i will build this tag with my own bare hands i swear to god #hallura x g'raha x aymeric #lore musing #ALSO....MY ASK BOX IS OPEN FOR PART 2.....#you need only say the word #god i freakin. i love my ot3 #can u believe less than a month ago i was so sure i was gonna have to break someone's heart #i was a coward then #but i have seen truth #elveny #ffxiv

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just-my-sickly-pride · 5 years ago

Text

Socks with the Rainbow Guitars || Brian May x fem!Reader

summary || roger wants his damn socks, and he won’t take no for an answer. even if it means interrupting your ‘alone time’ with brian.

rating || explicit (18+ only). do not read if you are under eighteen. there is implied roger x reader, and reference to a previous roger x reader x brian threesome

word count || 2.1k

author’s notes || click here for the rest of the try series. despite what this may appear to be from the summary and rating, this isn’t some ‘spontaneous threesome’ fic. it’s just roger being a little shit, mostly. a filler chapter, sure, but i enjoyed writing it, so i hope you enjoy reading it! fun lil fact - the socks that roger describes are actually socks that i own and i 100% understand roger’s insistence that he wears those socks bc they’re great socks. (sidenote: for those of y’all who have recently sent in requests, i am getting to them eventually, but i’m taking a lil break from writing while my creative tank refills. the past few instalments in this series were actually written a few weeks/months ago; they’re not newly-written.)

masterlist

“Christ, why don’t we do it this way more often,” Brian said as you wriggled your hips experimentally in his lap.

You laughed, glancing over your shoulder to reply. “What, you don’t like to see my face when I’m riding you?”

“Shut up,” Brian said. “You know that’s not it.”

You leant forward, bracing yourself on his shins, and dragged yourself up and down his cock, and a moan ripped out of him.

“Oh, my God.”

You smiled to yourself. Sure, you knew Brian liked your face. But he also liked your ass. A lot. You didn’t do reverse cowgirl very often, but when you did, Brian always reacted like you’d showed him the secrets to the Universe.

His hands smoothed over your hips and lower back as you took your time. His thumbs ventured over your ass, pressing into your flesh, and he hissed.

“I know you don’t like being spanked,” he said, “but, Jesus, would your arse look so pretty all red and marked.”

“Thanks,” you said mildly. Then you added, “Maybe you’ll just have to think of a different way to make it all pretty and red.”

“As if I haven’t thought of a hundred already,” Brian muttered.

“Which are?”

Brian’s hips bucked up against yours, and he hissed again, his thumbs digging into your skin even more. “Scratch it up,” he said. “You can ride me, and I’d just scratch it up so good, all the way up your back, too.”

You hummed in thought – Brian loved it when you scratched him up, but it didn’t really do much for you – then gasped when Brian gripped your hips and pulled you sharply against him.

“A whip,” Brian grunted, just about shoving you up his cock and slamming you down again. You got the message and went a bit faster, a bit messier.

“Too similar to s–spanking,” you said.

“I know,” Brian said.

You let your head hang between your shoulders, your eyes closing. “Fuck, Bri, you feel so fucking good.”

Brian’s hands slid to your waist, and you shivered.

“My teeth,” he said. “I’d leave hickeys all over you, fuck.”

You moaned. That you could get on board with. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Brian’s thumbs dug into your ass again. “So pretty, all red and purple – shit.”

You could picture it. It would look pretty. “Yes, Brian, fuck.”

You sat back, and Brian’s hands went to your breasts, kneading them, pinching your nipples as you bounced in his lap. “Fuck, you’re so tight,” he moaned, one of his hands going down to your clit. You slowed down, circling your hips, enjoying his talented fingers. He bit into your shoulder, his breathing laboured.

Then a knock on the door.

Both of you froze, and, after the initial shock, you could feel the irritation radiating from Brian like he was radioactive. “What,” he demanded.

“It’s me,” Roger said. He cracked the door open just a touch, just enough for his voice to carry more easily. “Bri, have you got my guitar socks? The black ones with the rainbow guitars? I wanna wear them tonight.”

“For the love of God, Roger, can’t this wait?” Brian said.

“Well, do you have them?”

“I…” Brian sighed, and pressed his forehead against your shoulder in exasperation. “Yes, I think I do.”

“Can I just grab them? I’ll be super quick.”

“No!” you cried indignantly. “We’re a little busy at the moment!”

“I know, I know,” Roger said. “But it’s fine, I don’t mind. It’s nothing I haven’t seen before. I’ll barely even look.”

“I’ll give you your bloody socks when we’re done,” Brian growled.

“I have to leave in two minutes.”

“You couldn’t have thought to get them before?”

“I forgot it was your guys’ night,” Roger protested. “You disappeared into Brian’s room before I could get them. And anyway, Brian, if you hadn’t taken my socks, then we wouldn’t be in this position in the first place.”

You clicked your tongue, rolling your eyes. “Just let him in,” you whispered to Brian. “We’ll be here all night otherwise.”

“I am literally inside you right now,” Brian hissed. “We are naked.”

“I know, but he said he’ll barely even look. He’ll be quick.”

“What’s his other option, hold a conversation? And he shouldn’t be looking at all. He can just wear other socks.”

“My ride’s almost here,” Roger said impatiently. “C’mon, please?”

Brian groaned, but it most definitely was not a sound of pleasure. “Ugh, fine. Fucking twat.” He wrapped his arms around your waist, hugging you close. You didn’t know whether you should cover yourself in any way – it felt strange to be completely exposed, but just as strange to cover yourself up too much – so you hesitantly crossed one of your arms over your chest, half-concealing your breasts, but not entirely.

Roger exploded into the room, hurrying over to Brian’s wardrobe. Like he’d said, he barely even glanced your way. “In your undies drawer?”

“Yes,” Brian said through gritted teeth.

You curled in on yourself, unsure whether your body felt like it was burning from embarrassment or from the thrill of being caught in a more than compromising situation, and you covered your mouth, giggling into your palms.

“I can’t find them,” Roger said.

“Roger,” Brian snapped, “I swear to God–”

“Oh, never mind! Found them.” Roger turned to the two of you to present the socks proudly.

“Roger!” you cried in admonishment, shying away from him.

“Sorry, sorry,” Roger said. He turned away, and started pulling on a sock, balancing on one foot.

“What are you doing?” Brian cried. “Get the fuck out.”

Roger teetered, struggling with the sock, and lost his balance, his head almost hitting the door of Brian’s closet. He gave up. “Fine, fine, all right,” he said huffily, holding his arms up in surrender. “I’m leaving.”

He scurried out, and went to close the door behind him, but poked his head back in to say, “You guys are doing great! You look fantastic. And you sound–” He held up his free hand in a ‘nice’ gesture, clicking his tongue in approval, flashing you a wink.

You laughed, and Brian yelled, “Roger!”

Roger ducked out again, closing the door. “Enjoy your night!” he called cheerily.

You listened to him head into the living room, then you dissolved into giggles, and Brian sighed, squeezing you closer to him.

“I can’t believe that just happened!” you whisper-yelled, rubbing your hands up and down Brian’s forearms soothingly. Brian was still inside you, and it still felt good, but you didn’t know if you were in the mood so much after that wild turn of events.

“Yeah, neither,” Brian grumbled. “What a complete and utter bitch. I bet he did it just to piss me off.”

“Can we stop?” You leant back against Brian’s chest, reaching behind you to stroke the side of his face. “I don’t really feel like it anymore.”

Brian sighed again. “Bet he did it on purpose,” he said again. “Yeah, course we can stop.”

You climbed off him, and turned around to give him a soft kiss. He took off his condom, letting it drop to the floor beside the bed.

“Here,” you said reassuringly, reaching down to wrap your hand around him, casually jerking him off.

Brian made a sound in the back of his throat. “You don’t have to.”

“Nah, I want to. Wanna take it slow, though.” You paused, getting comfortable, and then resumed. You’d done this so many times you barely had to look at what you were doing anymore, relying solely on feel and how Brian’s breathing changed.

Brian reached over and ran his large hand over your thigh, and you gave him a smile. Your mind strayed to Roger’s bizarre entrance, and you let out another giggle. Brian rolled his eyes, but smiled as well, and then took your hand, tugging you towards him. He cupped your jaw in his hands and kissed you – gently, but with just enough bite to it that it was still unmistakably Brian – and you twisted your hand in just the right way, making him moan into your mouth.

You smiled against his lips, and he smiled back, then kissed you once more. You heard the front door open, and slam shut a second later.

“So,” you said as you pumped your hand, “did you like being watched?”

Brian grunted, his hips bucking into your hand. “Wh– What?”

“Being inside me when Roger was in the room?”

Brian frowned slightly. “He wasn’t watching.”

You shrugged a shoulder, and kept the steady pace. Not too slow that Brian would get impatient too quickly, but not too fast that he’d come earlier than you wanted him to. “I know,” you said. “But he was still here.”

“He’s been in the room when we’ve fucked before. He’s been on the bed when we’ve fucked before. In fact, if I recall, he was once actually lying underneath you when I fucked you.” Brian let his head fall back against the headboard, eyes closed, mouth hanging open slightly. “Not that… Not that exciting.”

There was a lot to unpack there, but you pushed it aside for now. “But he’s never walked in on us like that before.”

“Why are you drilling me with questions while you’re wanking me off?”

“Sorry.” You focused back on task, taking the time to drink in Brian’s flushed skin and his blissed-out expression.

His hand twitched on your thigh, and you knew he was about to move it over yours to speed you up, so you did it without him having to ask.

His breath caught, and he moaned softly, then said, “Did– did you like being watched?”

“Maybe a little? I don’t know,” you said truthfully. “Not really. It was more funny than anything else.”

Brian huffed a laugh. “I did like–” You sped up the tiniest bit more. His leg shifted on the bed, his back arching slightly. “Fuck, keep doing that.”

“Just like this?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

You hesitated, chewing on your lip, then said, “What were you going to say? You did like what?”

“Can you – ask me after I’ve… after I’ve come, please?” he gasped.

You pouted a little, but sighed, and kept going.

“Don’t sigh.”

You chuckled. “Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.”

Brian let out a strangled gasp, his core tensing, and he squeezed his eyes shut. “Faster, please.”

You complied, and his hand was squeezing your thigh. His breath raked in and out of him in short bursts.

You sped up even more, and he panted out, “Ah, I’m coming, fuck.”

You always liked watching Brian come, watching him twitch like he was only just stopping himself from completely writhing, watching his whole body tense and his cock pulse, watching how he went loose and relaxed afterwards, watching his chest heave as he tried to get his breath back, watching his eyes flutter open and search for you, land on you, slowly come back into focus. Watching a smile bloom on his face.

You leant forward to kiss him, and he cupped the back of your head, his other thumb rubbing across your thigh. He hummed contentedly against your lips, and then you pulled back.

“Thanks for that,” he said with a warm, lazy smile.

You smiled back. “You’re welcome.” You ducked forward for a quick peck. “Pass me a tissue?”

He reached over to the bedside table and passed you a handful of tissues – you wiped your hand, and he cleaned himself up.

“I was going to say I liked telling him to get out,” Brian said. He held out his hand, and you scrunched up the tissues, handing them over. He threw them into the bin beside the bed.

“Oh, you liked bossing him around?” you said flirtatiously, tracing a finger down the centre of his chest.

Brian caught your hand, smiling, slightly exasperatedly. “No,” he said, his eyes soft on you. “I don’t mean it like that. I enjoyed telling him to piss off the same way I enjoy… getting a good mark on an exam. A sense of satisfaction. And I also liked that he wasn’t even allowed to look at you. I’m fine sharing when it’s a pre-arranged thing, but when it’s just you and me, you’re mine.” He paused, his gaze going to the ceiling as he considered his words. “That part was a little less a sense of satisfaction and a little more…”

“Kinky,” you finished for him. “Possessive. Jealous.”

“Maybe,” he said, grinning at you. His teeth caught your eye, and you pressed your fingertip to one of his pointy canines, then your thumb.

His tongue darted out to lick your thumb, and you withdrew it with a squeak. He laughed, and pulled you in for another kiss. You happily obliged.

#brian may x reader #roger taylor x reader #roger taylor x reader x brian may #idk if i should really use that tag for this but w/e #try series #try verse #mine #my writing #rpf #smut

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thebestpersonherelovesbucky · 5 years ago

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Some of you might remember about two months ago when I needed to vent about my horrible bitch face cousin, Barbara.

Well.

I need to vent again.

Yesterday was my aunt’s funeral/memorial. It was an extremely emotional day. Top off with a lovely serving of “are you fucking kidding me?”.

Let’s start off with our arrival at the church. On the positive side, despite the pandemic, there was an overwhelming turnout. So many people loved this woman.

The first person we’re greeted by is Barbara’s brother; let’s call him Paschall. I haven’t seen him in several years. I could be mad about that, but I’m not cause he’s sort of just an airhead who means well and has admitted that it was wrong that no one ever came to help us with our grandmother. We hug. I hold him as he starts to cry.

Next, I see Barbara’s older sister ((the oldest of the three)) who we’ll call Rachel. Rachel hugs me and tells me she loves my hair ((it’s currently violet)).

This is all in the lobby of the church where there are poster boards with pictures of my aunt. We’ll...get back to those.

Finally, we meet up with Barbara.

This is the first time we have any interaction with her since my first venting post about the situation. But the day was not about her ((or so we thought)) and we approach her with kindness and sympathy, which she receives the way any nice person might. We hug. She tells us that we should sit up in the front bc we’re family. ((very kind of her, right?))

But we go and up in front of the altar, where the urn would be placed, were more pictures. One of just my aunt. One of her and my uncle’s wedding. And one of her and Barbara. JUST HER AND BARBARA. Not a picture of her and all three of her children. Just her and Barbara.

The mass starts ((Catholic)) and the procession is made up of Paschall, one of Barbara’s sons...and her fucking husband.

Now, I don’t want to just to conclusions. I think to myself, well, maybe they asked Dad if he would be part of it and he was too upset to do it. But...nope. No, no. Barbara, who basically took over and in my uncle’s grief, took advantage and just made everything to her specifications, had her son and her husband over my aunt’s fucking brother in the service.

For those of you not familiar with a Catholic Mass/funeral, it typically involves 3 people giving readings (the first reading from the Old Testament, a psalm, the second reading from the New Testament), the Priest reading a passage from the Gospel and He then gives His homily/sermon. The first three readings, in a service such as this, are usually done by members of the deceased family. The surviving family members ask someone to read and it’s actually an honor to be asked.

The people who read were a niece from my uncle’s side of the family, a friend of their family, and a nephew from my uncle’s side of the family.

I am 100% not saying that my uncle’s side of their family is any less part of her family than ours, but...my siblings and I are her brother’s children. I’m her goddaughter. We weren’t asked to do anything.

And my youngest sister is an accomplished singer. She’s sung as baseball games and other events. We thought the young girl singing in church just happened to sing at the church.

Nope.

No, she was the daughter of Barbara’s friend.

During the Priest’s sermon, he never mentioned our side of the family once. Obviously, this is not his fault if he was not made aware of us, but he kept referring to my aunt as a wife, a mother, and a friend. She was my father’s sister. And her mother is still alive, albeit sick with dementia and in a nursing home and doesn’t even know any of us anymore, and we’re still trying to heal from caretaker burnout but...never mentioned her.

Because of social distancing, we were sitting behind my parents and I could see how my father was visibly hurt more and more as the service went on.

And just guess who gave the Eulogy? Go on! Guess! I bet you only need one try!

BARBARA!!!

And she continued to make it ALL.ABOUT.HER. She barely mentioned her siblings, she talked about her husband and her children, and she couldn’t even be bothered to mention my father by name the one time she said anything about him. Which was, and I quote “she spent time in the summers with her brother.”

As if they didn’t grow up together. As if ((until Barbara changed all our traditions)) we didn’t spend holidays together. As if he was just this one-off side character in her life.

It should go without saying that the rest of us weren’t mentioned either.

But! She was kind enough to mention our grandmother and basically said that if she wasn’t in a nursing home now, that she’d’ve been there with us. Like...

No, Barbara, she has dementia. She’s in a place where she’s safe. And this may come as a surprise to you, but actually trying to take care of someone with a disease like that isn’t fucking easy. But see, she wouldn’t know, bc she only helped with her own mother for maybe an hour or two at a time and only if my uncle took her kids ((I won’t sell her completely short, she did help once she was in a home. Very convenient, right?)) and she never helped with my grandmother save for the one time she came to do her hair. As a hairdresser, you’d think she’d’ve come to help with her hair so that we didn’t need to, huh? Of course, not.

The whole time she was delivering her Eulogy, Rachel didn’t even look up. Not once. She was pissed. In fact, when Barbara finished, Paschall got up to hug her, Rachel did not move. Not until Barbara actually came into the pew for one. Telling. Very telling.

Anyway, the service ends and remember those pictures in the front of the church I mentioned earlier?

Now we get a chance to really look at them.

My aunt’s life clearly did not start until Barbara was born.

One picture with her and my dad. Two pictures with her and our grandmother. Zero pictures of her and our grandfather. None when she was a little girl. A few with her other kids. Her and my uncle. TONS with Barbara and her children. And...a whole lot with her and Barbara’s IN-LAWS.

I just...

And it’s not like she didn’t have pictures to use. WE sent her a whole bunch! Before the first round of bullshit!! Us being kind and trying to send her memories of her and her mother and it was like we didn’t fucking exist.

And that, guys, gals, and nb pals, is how to make someone else’s funeral all about you.

Oh, PS:

She also said to my brother “I wish I could go see grandma and do her hair for her. I hate that I can’t.”

My brother, to us, was like “Thanks, Barbara, where’ve you been the last half a decade???”

#my stuff #and that's the end of my rant #long post #jfc #i can't even with this bitch #i felt so bad for my dad #like bc you're MAD at him for not letting you facetime with your grandmother who has DEMENTIA #and won't understand wtf is going on #you exclude him from his own sister's funeral?#ugh #just...fucking hell #anyway #yeah #that's it #sorry #stfubucks

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kayliemusing · 4 years ago

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cupboard – are you petty? - Not really

delilah – do you have any pets? - Two siamese cats!

misfire – do you want any kids? if so, how many? - Maybe. I change my mind a lot lol. I can see myself with 2-3 kids.

killer queen – what’s an outfit that makes you feel sexy? - I never feel sexy but an outfit that always makes me feel mostly confident is my ribbed sweater tucked into high waisted jeans with a blazer on top.

radio gaga – top five favorite songs? - All Too Well by Taylor Swift, Wild Heart by Bleachers, Saturdays by Twin Shadow, Sleep On The Floor by The Lumineers, and Exile by Taylor Swift ft Bon Iver

freddie – tell us about someone who has changed your life positively. - This might be lame, but Taylor Swift. Obviously she's not a person who is physically in my life lol but I've looked up to her my whole life as a writer and then also as a person, and I just think her music has enriched my whole life is so many different ways from just helping me cope, to providing me with inspiration for my own writing ventures, to just giving me a distraction from life when it gets tough.

brian – what is something you are passionate about? - Writing, love, and being good to people.

john – are you a creative person? - I think so. Sometimes I don't feel like I'm creative enough or in the way I want to be, but I do have a creative spark to me.

roger – what’s a common misconception about you? - I'm quiet and a little on the socially anxious side, so I think a common misconception is that I'm mousy or people can walk all over me and I won't say anything but actually I have really high standards and given the chance, I can be very direct with my expectations or feelings. Like sometimes I'll let things slide but if it continues happening, I'll usually be like "hey stop". On that note, I also think people don't ever expect that I'm really protective too. It's always fun when people think I'm quiet and then they're mean or disrespectful about someone I care about and I stand up for them because there's always this moment of surprise from people lol.

deaky – do you have any nicknames? - Not really. My aunt still calls me Kay Rae sometimes but that's an old one from when I was like super little lol. No one really has a nickname for me.

all dead – when was the last time you cried? - Yesterday.

don’t stop me now – what’s your go-to happy song? - Usually any upbeat Taylor Swift song like Shake It Off or ME! (Both of which get a bad rap for being "annoying" or "childish" which I respectfully disagree with because they're bops and they get the job done).

lover boy – are you a romantic? - Yes

maracas – what’s your prized possession? - I don't know if I really have one. Probably my phone I guess.

bites the dust – bassists or drummers? - I don't really have an opinion tbh. Maybe bassists?

live aid – what’s your dream concert line-up? - Probably like: Taylor Swift, Haim, The Lumineers, Conan Gray, The 1975, Of Monsters and Men, Halsey, and maybe Olivia Rodrigo. I've never really considered this lol.

clean machine – what’s your dream car? - Of all time, I would love to have like a 1970s chev convertible but realistically for me right now I want the Hyundai venue so bad.

mercury – if you could change your name, would you? - Yes, because I find my name childish sounding. I'm a writer and one of my biggest things about my name is that I don't think it sounds professional enough lol

drowse – how do you spend your lazy days? - Not doing my hair or makeup and just watching YouTube all day.

make love – what is your sexuality? - Heterosexual

hot space – what’s an unpopular opinion you have? - Ariana Grande's voice annoys me. I have no beef with her as a person, I just find her voice kind of annoying especially when she's doing that shouty notes thing or where she drags out her notes. It's kind of the same reason I don't like Carrie Underwood much anymore because of the constant up and down octaves. Drives me insane.

‘39 – what are you afraid of? - Spiders, loss, failure/not achieving my dreams, living an ordinary or mundane life in which I never find joy or fulfillment.

borhap – are you happy? - No

jim – are you in love? - No

mary – are you friends with any of your exes? - I don't have exes, because I've never dated *finger guns*

mustapha – how many languages do you speak? - Just English

flash – favorite movie? - Hm, probably Clueless. It's always the first one that pops in my head lol.

las palabras de amor – what’s the most romantic thing someone has ever done for you? - They haven't lmao

tenement funster – are you a good flirt? - No, because I'm shy so I only laugh nervously

rainbow – best concert you’ve ever been to? - I guess Marianas Trench in 2013. I haven't really been to a crazy good show but I remember really enjoying that one. (But via Netflix Taylor Swift's rep tour is the best concert of all time)

scrabble – do you and your friends have any traditions? - We used to get together every halloween night or the night before depending on our schedules and watch every disney channel halloween movie. It was one of my favourite things, but Friend A moved to Vancouver and Friend B isn't in my life anymore.

seven seas – where have you always wanted to travel? - NYC, LA, Prince Edward Island, France, and Hawaii are the big ones, but lately I've really been wanting to see Charleston South Carolina, Edinburgh Scotland, and The Lakes District in England.

keep yourself alive – what keeps you alive? - Taylor Swift's music tbh lmao

liar – are you good at sensing when someone is lying to you? - If they're being obvious or hard to believe, yes, but if they're good at lying, probably not lol.

modern times – if you could go back in time, what decade would you travel to? - I have this weird longing to see Victorian London, maybe around 1830-60s. It probably wasn't a vibe, but I'm in love with Victorian London architecture and furniture so it is what it is. Also would have loved to enjoy the 80s.

japan – favorite place you’ve traveled to? - I haven't been outside of Canada so my list is short. I'd probably say Victoria, BC, but I never was able to fully enjoy it because I had a stomach virus when we were there so every time I ate I felt sick which feels very on brand for me.

garden lodge – what’s your dream home? - I literally have an entire pinterest board dedicated to this. It would be a cozy farmhouse/french country style cottage out in the countryside surrounded by fields and wildflowers.

disco – guilty pleasure? - Buzzfeed quizzes and romance novels.

sunglasses – how’s your eyesight? - Okay. I wear glasses, but my prescription isn't awful. Bad enough that I can't be without my glasses, but good enough that I'm not totally blind if I ever lost them. (I can't see distance so I mean I probably wouldn't get in the car and drive if I lost my glasses but that's beside the point.)

1977 – long hair or short hair? - I'm currently in a phase of needing to grow out my hair, but I generally love cute short hairstyles.

smile – when you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? - I wanted to be in business.

cheese toast – favorite food? - cheesecake

blazer – do you share your clothes? - With my sister sometimes yeah.

lap of the gods – if you could meet anyone, alive or dead, who would it be and what would you tell them? - Taylor Swift, and I'd probably just talk to her about personal stuff and then how she's been an inspiration to me as a writer.

#survey

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rorysfm · 5 years ago

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hllo demons n nerds ! i’m sage, coming 2 u live frm the est gutters! i am... v excited to be here but i am literally the worst at intros so i’m jus gonna diiiiive right into rory below !

(ISABELLA JONES, CISFEMALE) - Have you seen AURORA LEBLANC? RORY is in HER SOPHOMORE year. The DANCE AND SOCIOLOGY MAJOR is 19 years old & is a LIBRA. People say SHE is LIVELY, MAGNETIC, IMPULSIVE and UNRELIABLE. Rumors say they’re a member of CALLOWAY. I heard from the gossip blog that HER PARENTS ARE COVERING UP THAT SHE WAS KICKED OUT OF YALE FOR PLAGIARISM AND NO OTHER IVY WOULD ACCEPT HER, SO THEY BOUGHT HER WAY INTO YATES

ok, so.. rory is a brand new muse of mine so.. pls bare w me while i sort her out. if u want to skip the mess below & just vibe check her.. here’s her pinterest!

BACKGROUND

born and raised in greenwood, south carolina to oliver and lauren leblanc. her parents were high school sweethearts who were voted most likely to get married and have a dozen kids running around

they stopped at 2 because they jus... their kids were a handful but rory will tell you they stopped after her bc they hit perfection :~)

her mom’s family teetered between lower-middle class, her mom entering a bunch of pageants to bring in some extra cash for them.

her dad’s side on the other hand, is where all the connections are baby!!

the leblancs come from a long long line of being wrapped up in the political world. governors, members of the state senate, mayors, advisers... you name it - a leblanc has had that position.

her dad’s goals were no different than the rest of his family’s ... some would say even bigger bc he wants to do what no other leblanc was able to do, which is... run for president. (yes hello.. rory as the future first daughter?)

growing up her parents were honestly... not the best. like above all else they put oliver’s career above their kids and it wasn’t not being there for an important recital, or a parent-teacher night; it was being there for all the wrong reasons.

every little thing they did was calculating to make the leblancs look like the perfect family. hugs and words of encouragement loud enough to filter through the room aimed at their darling children only for them to turn cold and criticise every single thing they did wrong as soon as they got into the car. it was pretty clear that oliver and lauren were a team, and their kids were just props.

when rory was 12, lauren started making monthly appointments at the hair salon to dye rory’s hair blonde... she had a standing appointment every tenth of the month to have her roots touched up

rory’s mom jus rly... pushed rory on her looks and enrolled her in pageants, debutante balls, anything that showed off rory’s looks... lauren pushed her towards it.

rory and her brother declan stayed in their hometown for school until college bc their parents thought it made them look like more of wholesome family so instead of sending them off to boarding schools in london or new york, they opted for private schools in south carolina

both of them were of course pushed into going to well renowned schools, their grandfather had pushed them into going to yates since he, himself had been part of calloway and they were practically legacies and while declan followed thru with it... rory watched the cinderella story one too many times and like hilary duff..... sis went to princeton for political science!!!

only it ended up in flames bc tbh she was like a bull in a china shop, the freedom of not having her parents around to judge every single thing she did? or pushing her into doing things she hated? she od’d on FREEDOM. rory rly just did her own thing, kinda spiralled out of control.. never hard drugs but lots of drinking and partying.

she ended up getting put on probation and was flunking nearly every course. the pressure really got to her (like she knew her parents would get involved if you got kicked out or if she failed all her courses) so she ended up plagiarising an essay ... but gueSS what!! she was caught and her parents got involved anyways.

her parents ended up being able to keep things ... quiet by paying off the teacher that had caught her. the dean also agreed to stay mum about it (after accepting a hefty cheque), so nothing ever went of her record, nothing would ever be documented of this mishap.

but... it’s likely people still talk and while rumors can’t be proven, it still stopped rory from getting into yale, harvard and columbia when she tried

finally with her grandfather’s pull and the promise to build yates a new library with the next 5 years... rory was accepted just as declan had graduated.

PRESENT

pulled up to yates in her vintage baby blue mercedes benz convertible from the 60′s

she’s brand new to yates, and switched out of political science.

out of all the activities and hobbies that her parents tried to push her into, dance was the only one she actually enjoyed doing and fell in love with

her parents let her major in it, as long as she did a double major.. so sis took sociology because why not?

spent her summer dancing with the new york ballet company in their production of a midsummer’s night dream.

honestly.. loved it but also was lowkey bummed out she missed out on a proper summer

right before declan had graduated, rory had come up for a campus tour and ended up partying at yates for a weekend

probably got herself into a bit of trouble, and probably made a nice little impression on a few people!

PERSONALITY

honestly.. chaotic good. she’s always been a little more on the wilder side than declan.. a little more carefree and daring and just always needed to be told to behave

in fact has a tattoo that says BEHAVE on her forearm, that she got one night back in princeton.

that said, she’s very good at playing her part in the family

dubbed as the golden girl... bc she is just that kind of girl that has a magnetic pull to her, a smile that could combat the sun and just naturally very charming and genuinely nice?? very good a convincing you without being manipulative about it

does only angel by harry styles play when she walks in the room? possibly.

the kind of girl that you spend weeks thinking about after one (1) conversation

still gets her hair dyed blonde the 10th of every month, bc her mother has convinced her she is just not meant to be a brunette :/

honestly.. she’s insecure abt a lot of things because of her mom :/

has really great posture and etiquette from all those pageant days. also really good at making cranes out of dinner napkins from being bored at functions her parents forced her to go to

would probably throw hands if she caught someone talking badly abt her brother bc she’s protective of him

very much a hopeless romantic, gets heart eyes very easily and likes to chase until it isn’t fun anymore and falls in love with multiple people a day.

tragically likes country music :/

promised her brother she wld.. try to be good and stay out of trouble but i reckon.... she won’t plagiarize an essay ever again but everything else? the partying? fair game.

CONNECTIONS

tbh i will take anything yall will give me... i am @ ur service serving rory on a silver platter to u

i’m also big on chemistry so we can just see where things go as well since rory is new to yates this could be fun!!

a few people she met while she was visiting last year.. someone she clicked with and they stayed in touch, maybe someone she flirted with but doesn’t remember then (even tho she’ll pretend she does!), someone she hooked up with perhaps? someone she spent all night talking to?

a brother’s friend she’s met a couple times?

good influence/bad influence

family friends

family rivals

cousins could be fun

a roommate

a tutor?

tinder matches? hook ups, flirtationship .. anything angsty!!

friends!! pleathe i will take them all.. a girl squad would also be quite fun!

ok.. that’s all tht my lil brain can come up with.. im sorry this is so long and such a mess but hmu if you’d like to plot!!

#yatesintro #omg whew chile.. this got so long #im so sorry #4 this and 4 this mess

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inejkaz · 5 years ago

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i was tagged by @mollyweasly to answer the following 73 questions! thank you for tagging me steph ♥

on a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now? i'm actually pretty content and the only thing that i'm rdreading right now is my upcoming finals so maybe 6!

describe yourself in a hashtag? #alwaystired

if you could do a love scene with anyone, who would it be? no one comes to mind but steph's answer was chris evans and i'd say the same tbh 👀

if your life was a musical, what would the marquee say? uh maybe "dumb bitch" or "chaotic mess" LMAO idk honestly my life isn't that interesting most of the time

what’s one thing people don’t know about you? that i'm lowkey depressed. most of my old friends know this but they don't rlly know how bad it makes me feel sometimes & i don't think i'll ever tell my college friends abt this except for one person!

what’s your wake up ritual? lay in bed for another 5-15 mins, check the time, and brush my teeth. next i'd either shower, workout, or attend online class

what’s your go to bed ritual? just on my phone looking at useless things and answering my friends' messages. i'll get tired soon so i'll just daydream and sleep. lately i've been listening to music to help me sleep!

what’s your favorite time of day? late night and early morning

your go to for having a good laugh? i love watching lip sync battles. my favorites are by emma stone, tom holland, anne hathaway & channing tatum!

dream country to visit? the UK! my cousin talks abt it all the time and now she's taking her postgrad degree there which makes me incredibly jealous 😢 but honestly i'm dying to travel europe as a whole!

what’s the biggest surprise you’ve ever had? probably when my high school friends bought me the doc martens shoes that i LOVE for my 17th birthday! i love them and miss them even tho many are not in touch with me anymore

heels or flats/sneakers? flats/sneakers definitely! i've never tried heels tbh i can only endure wedges and they alr hurt SO much

vintage or new? both

who do you want to write your obituary? probably my best friend!

style icon? taylor swift during the red era, noora sætre, orion carloto, ashley aka best.dressed!

what are three things you cannot live without? books, internet, family

what’s one ingredient you put in everything? salt

what 3 people living or dead would you want to make dinner for? taylor swift, chris evans, audrey hepburn

what’s your biggest fear in life? the unknown, anything horror & reptiles esp lizards (i can't stand reptiles AT ALL i'd literally cry and die if i have to touch one or sleep in the same room with one)

window or aisle seat? window

what’s your current tv obsession? haven't been watching any tv lately but i've been watching mukbangs on youtube a lot

favorite app? line (a messaging app mostly used by indonesians. i rlly like the stickers and themes i own lmao)

secret talent? i can play guitar just a lil bit

most adventurous thing you’ve ever done in your life? either drinking beers with my friends on a school field trip or not telling my parents that i went to the city alone during college just to hangout by myself

how would you define yourself in three words? introverted, chaotic, anxious

favorite piece of clothing you own? an adidas jacket that was on a 50% sale for international women's day!!!

a must have clothing item that everyone should have? black pants

a superpower you would want? invisibility and mind control!!!

what’s inspiring you in life right now? since i was a little kid, i've always been inspired by my cousin. she's my role model!

best piece of advice you’ve received? to literally BELIEVE in yourself

best advice you’d give your teenage self? don't be so self-aware bc everyone's busy with themselves, make more friends, cherish your time in school more

a book everyone should read? harry potter series, the raven cycle

what would you like to be remembered for? for being a good, positive person

how do you define beauty? beauty is whatever that evokes a positive feeling out of oneself i guess!

what do you love most about your body? my eyes

best way to take a rest/decompress? skincare, listen to soothing music, drink a warm beverage, watch smth that's easy to watch, and just sleep!

favorite place to view art? galleries, but i've only been to one sadly

if your life was a song, what would the title be? maybe "paradox" or "misunderstood"

if you could master one instrument, what would it be? piano! but it's expensive and not portable so if i'm being realistic, it'd be guitar

if you had a tattoo, where would it be? in the back of my neck! also maybe on any of my fingers or below my ribcage

dolphins or koalas? koalas

what’s your spirit animal? deer!

best gift you’ve ever received? doc martens shoes given by my friends!

best gift you’ve given? i think i wrote my friend letters to open when she's in different moods once

what’s your favorite board game? monopoly

what’s your favorite color? pink, purple, yellow, monochrome

least favorite color? i just dislike bright obnoxious colors

diamond or pearls? diamonds

drugstore makeup or designer? both, but i mostly can't afford designer anyway so..

blow-dry or air-dry? both

pilates or yoga? i've never tried any actually

coffee or tea? both, but i'm leaning towards tea

what’s the weirdest word in the english language? can't think of any right now..

dark chocolate or milk chocolate? milk chocolate!!!

stairs or elevators? elevators

summer or winter? winter

you are stuck on an island, you can pick one food to eat forever without getting tired of it, what would you eat? burgers!!

a dessert you don’t like? basically i won't like anything with fruits

a skill you’re working on mastering? photoshop i guess? i'm planning to learn coding too now that i have the time!!

best thing to happen to you today? probably finishing my gifset! but honestly, i was supposed to be studying lmao

worst thing to happen to you today? i didn't study lmao

best compliment you’ve ever received? i don't think it's anything that memorable so i can't really think of one

favorite smell? jasmine

hugs or kisses? both

if you made a documentary, would it be about? space, mythology

last piece of content you consumed that made you cry? i get a little teary eyed if i come across a touching content on instagram/twitter tbh lmao. but i'd say the last movie that made me cry so bad was her (2013)

lipstick or lipgloss? lipstick

sweet or savory? savory

girl crush? emma watson

how do you know your in love? don't think i've ever been in love, i've only experienced like a very long crush so...

a song you can listen to on repeat? there are a lot... but for now, woman by mumford & sons and anything by taylor swift

if you could switch lives with someone for a day, who would it be? taylor swift!!!

what are you most excited for about this time in your life? i've just been enjoying editing for tumblr a lot, i haven't really posted consistent content in my 10 years of being here so that's been fun. i also want to learn coding and become an overall healthier person by working out regularly & eating mindfully! honestly i'm trying to build my confidence and become healthier, both mentally and physically

tagging: @dianaprincie @cllianmurphy @cinderllas @edgarallan @rosamunqpike @gamoora @nataliamaximoff (sorry if you've done this before, feel free to ignore!)

#this took so long!!!!!#tag games

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chrsitophwaltz · 6 years ago

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MICKEY MEETS FC BAYERN (PART 4/4)

for the entire houston clownery experience click here

psa: if you’ve read the last 3 parts, then you know the drill. i just wanna add that i don’t know how coherent this is bc writing it drained me already. i typed it straight from my garbage brain so this is obviously NOT SAFE FOR WORK. if you’re brave or thirsty enough, or have holy water at the ready, then by all means please proceed.

*matthew mcconaughey voice* alright alright alright

we’ve reached the end, folks! it’s taken me longer than i thought to put this part out. mainly because my brain still can’t comprehend that this actually happened. y’all know that feeling where something happened and you just floated right through it then a few hours later when you’re all alone it hits and destroys you like a fucking trainwreck?

yeah, that’s what it’s been like.

so to recap:

friday: the team arrived. i was positioned nicely near the bus exit and my mind, body, and soul had been buzzing and ready for that moment. i had it all well-rehearsed too: niko steps out, i scream like a banshee for his name, he comes over-- with soft hair and glorious stubble and all-- to sign my shirt and take a gazillion pics. oh, and of course i try not to faint or drool all over him. it was almost fullproof. the problem? he never stepped out. he and thiago went straight to the airport for a press conference and were never in the team bus. i was ready to unleash death right then and there.

but oh well. all hope isn’t lost. i’m gonna be five rows behind the bayern bench the next day during the game anyway. got the tickets within an hour or so after sales opened. i can thirst to my heart’s content over him and his beautiful backside for two hours. and i had this huge ass sign ready, asking for his bottle. it’s bigger and brighter than my life. he CANNOT possibly miss that, right?

saturday: game day! i’ve been buzzing the entire morning and early afternoon. today’s the day! my first time inside a football (american) stadium too. and i was kinda nervous about my sign’s debut too. what if he does see it and give me his bottle? what would i do? do i manage to keep cool or do i smash it right into my eye socket in front of him? until now i still don’t know

so we go down to the stadium. my sign was getting some attention too. people, bayern fans and madridies alike, stopped me and asked what it meant (i had to sheepishly explain to random people that yes, i am indeed asking for his bottle, and no, y’all don’t wanna know why). some guy even got it on his video camera but idk what he did with it sjdfdjkfdjkfsfs

i got settled into my seat and h o l y s h i t i was so close to the pitch and the bench! all the drama? i got it! all the shirt-changing action? i got em too! and all the angry niko antics??? best believe they’re seared into my mind forever and ever!!!!

(dare i say, with full risk of sounding like a downright whore, the man’s got real juicy buns in the back oven. like, fuck me!!!! he’s fit as fucking fuck!!!!!!!! he also loves to whistle and scream instructions and mouth off to hansi on the bench. oh, and to randomly thrust his hips like nobody’s fuckin business!!!!!!!!)

(srsly niko, why do that???? GET OFF MY DAMN NECK!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!! my 17-year old sister was beside me and i had to be 110% a responsible, sane adult!!!!!!! even the guy sitting behind us eventually caught on to my thirst since he saw me filming niko the whole duration of the game sddbsjfdjfnsm)

anyway, niko LOVES to hydrate and he probably finished around 4-5 bottles of water. at one point he looked over at where i was and i’m sure as h e l l he saw my sign (it was a huge ass board). but guess what? it’s like he knew just how desperate i was and kept on sexily chugging. god fucking dammit, niko!!!!

y’all know what happened to all those bottles? NOTHING! they’re just piled up on the bench never to be used again. i was right there, niko! A CRUMB! just one fuckin crumb was all i asked for!!!!!!!!!!!! he could’ve thrown that bottle straight at my fuckin face and i would’ve THANKED him

the game ended, we won, and NO BOTTLE. a bitch was sad!!! a bitch was going STIR CRAZY!!!!! the team only had one day left before they left for kansas city. i’ve been trying to get info on how to get into the practice session so i can see him and all the boys. but of course! the training session might as well be in secret because it’s invite-only!!! even the paulaner bbq event was closed. the only events that were open were the mall meet-and-greets. but those wouldn’t have niko or the rest of the boys in them.

please bear in mind again that i decided to shell out extra just to make that one day extension happen.

i had to see the entire team. i needed to experience niko up close. if i don’t get to do this now, then god knows when i’ll get the chance to do so again.

so, driven by desperation, i made a totally uninformed decision to go to the hotel at some random time the next day. ultimately, it was either the hotel or the carl lewis track. i figured the hotel would be a safer bet since i’d been there before and it was closer to the mall where the meet-and-greets would be (just in case the worst happened and i failed to catch them before they left for practice or wherever).

hotel or track? hotel.

what time? probably 8:30.

did i know what i was doing? absolutely fucking not.

but hey, couldn’t hurt, right? it was bonkers. truly bananas. but what choice did i have? in the end, i just wanted to be able to tell myself that i tried.

sunday:

i’ve been thinking about what to call this part. here’s some of what comes to mind:

1. crazy binch follows crazy idea and it works? it’s more likely than you think!

2. if you like it (i LOVED it) then you should’ve put a ring on it (I MCFUCKIN DID!!!!! in my head at least sksdjfksdfsdfh)

3. the day kathleen krüger probably wanted my head on a spike (and i don’t blame her)!

so the events from parts 1 and 2 happened. saw and greeted kathleen krüger in decent german. it was going pretty well. somewhere in there, during the sven/leon mishap, it finally happened. the moment that i’ve been waiting for. perfection!

*record scratch* eh, not really.

look, i’m 5′3 (and 1/2, i’m gonna insist on that). leon is 6′2. sven is about 6′3 or 6′4? anyway, y’all get it. they’re tall af.

and niko? a very sexy 5′9.

so in the haze of mortification and embarrassment brought about by the sven/leon mishap, i completely missed niko going out of the hotel. the binch literally had to be positioned in between sven and leon and all the other tall german people milling around the hotel. my ass had been on alert for him nearly the entire week (and let’s be real, for months) and when the moment finally presented itself, it completely flew over my head. i nearly ruined my own damn plan.

thankfully though, i’d been chatting with the bayern staff earlier and they knew that i’d been waiting this whole time to meet niko. i wondered out loud, “ugh, when is niko gonna show up he’s usually one of the earlier ones” and the guy in the red audi fcb tour polo shirt frowned and said “what? he literally just went out. didn’t you see him?”

my world literally stopped. i wanted to slap myself. my ears were ringing.

niko, already out? how could i have missed him? had he already gone up the bus???

i literally did a 360 so fast i gave myself whiplash and saw through the glass doors the man i’d been waiting forever for. he was clad in his blue coach kit of shirt and shorts. i could also swear he was glowing like an angel (probably bc of the bright sun or the product of my thirst-addled brain, idk).

there was another problem, though: he wasn’t stopping. he was going straight for the bus. and his leggies were f a s t.

and where was i? still frozen in shock inside the freaking hotel!!!!

i’m not the fastest person in the world but man, adrenaline really does work wonders! thank goodness my brain chose that moment to regain its function and spurred my body into motion. with no fucks left to give, i ran full tilt through the throng of people leisurely heading out, past the security guards who looked at me like i was insane (i was), out of the hotel and into the courtyard where there were about 50 or so fans behind the barriers who had gathered to catch a glimpse of the team.

it was like everything was in slow-mo. there was kathleen, patiently standing near the bus door and taking inventory of the players and staff before they leave. and there was niko, with literally one foot lifted to go up the first step into the bus.

my brain did a quick calculation. even with adrenaline, he’d already be up and inside the bus by the time i get to where he was. they may have let me inside the hotel, but i knew the bus was off limits. i had to stop him before he’s out of reach. and i knew that if i missed him, then that would be the absolute last time i’d see him in houston. that was my last chance.

i already had one foot dipped into the proverbial pool of shame. i was vaguely aware that i had the hotel staff stationed near the door and some fans looking at me bc of my marathon sprint antic. why not just take the full plunge, right?

so i did the only thing i could do to stop him: i screamed for him. throat open, full diaphragm, lungs out screamed: “NIKO! NIKO PLEASE!” my voice and the desperation that it was absolutely dripping with echoed within the walls of the hotel entrance.

i don’t even know the others’ reaction to that anymore, and i don’t really wanna know. all i know was that it worked! he stopped and turned around to look. and god was he. so. beautiful!!!

overjoyed that he paused, i ran straight towards him. there was a body in front of me that i barely dodged in my haste and i belatedly realized it was the team photographer taking shots of the departure. i nearly bowled him over and destroyed his expensive camera but thankfully i somehow managed to do a the matrix-esque maneuver and ducked under his arms and up again straight back to niko. the look on my face must’ve been shocking and horrific (i bet) because as i zoomed in on niko, i saw poor kathleen just behind him, still near the bus door, go tense with her eyes as big as saucers.

look, i understand. if i were the team manager of a popular football team, and some woman was running straight for one of my charges, with A Certain Look on her face, and with the bus door wide open, i’d be worried af. she probably thought i was gonna attack niko (somewhat true, but not in the way she thought...or was it?) and/or infiltrate the team bus. my intentions were pure (ish), of course, but my face didn’t reflect that.

the Queen knew martial arts and could’ve karate-kicked me off the face of the earth and away from niko, but she didn’t. so thank you, kathleen. and i apologize.

safe from kathleen’s wrath (for now), i turned my full attention to niko. i was finally in front of him!!!!! my dream had finally come true!!!!!!!!!!!

my brain and my soul were trying to leave my body and i wasn’t really 100% percent in the moment, but even with the little presence of mind i had left it was too much to bear. niko looked a bit perplexed, like i might attack him or something (with the way i looked, ran, and shouted like an animal i totally get it), but still managed to look relaxed, open, and friendly. he looked at me expectantly and i felt my mouth move to ask for an autograph and my hands give him my cardboarded jersey and sharpie. i wasn’t in control of my body anymore but thank god it knew exactly what i wanted.

niko, a true angel sent down from the heavens above, gracefully took my shirt and sharpie. i’m pretty sure my mouth was wide open and probably had some drool hanging off, and i could feel kathleen’s stare boring holes into the side of my head. as he was signing it, my last few brain cells were roasting.

his hair was soft and ungelled, and was damp (he looked like he recently just came out of the shower) and as his head was bent down, That Stray Lock of Hair flopped into his forehead. it nearly made me pass tf out!!! the sun was also shining brightly and his stubble was already silvery (thanks to bayern’s season of clownery!) so when the light caught it, it literally shone. each strand was literally p e r f e c t i o n. perfect length, perfect texture (from the looks of it; i didn’t dare touch no matter how much i wanted to bc thankfully i still had one fragile shred of dignity left, and i’m sure kathleen would’ve brought out the shotgun), perfect everything. i was about to have a coronary right then and there.

i’ve thought a lot about what i wanted to say to him if i did get the chance to meet him and talk to him. i remembered all the highs and lows of last season and as he finished signing my shirt, i thanked him and said “good luck, niko. and don’t listen to everything they say; you’ll always have people to stand behind you and the team no matter what.” at least that’s what i thought i said. i don’t really remember bc i was half spaced out. but i must’ve said something to that effect bc he looked up from what he was doing and gave me a big, and dare i say, relieved (?), smile. god, his eyes. they were so green. and soft. and really, really kind.

he was probably surprised that i said that to him, what with my earlier crazed stunt. but of course, ever the gentleman, he said “thank you so much” G O D!!!! HIS ACCENT!!!!! if you haven’t heard him speak in english yet, or just speak at all, now’s the time to google that shit. it’s deadly af on video, but goddamn, like everything else about him in person, it’s truly something else live.

mercifully, when he gave me back my shirt and pen, i still had enough life left in me to ask for a picture before i finally passed out. i never would’ve forgiven myself if i forgot!!!

me: thanks again, niko. is it alright if we take a picture?

niko: sure, of course! (god i love him; also, he loves to say “of course” for some reason sjkdhfdfjsdkfh)

so i had my shirt and sharpie in my left hand, and was trying to work my phone with my right hand. niko sidled up real close to my left side and HOLY FUCKING SHIT. he was so warm. and his arm was f i r m. he was leaning really close and my brain was short-circuiting from trying to memorize every single detail and trying to work my phone camera.

(note: my lock screen is niko drenched in beer after they won the bundesliga. thankfully, i turned off my phone’s auto lock just the night before. imagine if he saw me trying to unlock my phone with his wet self plastered on my screen. i never would’ve survived the shame.)

as i was skin on skin with niko, my organs were literally failing. my hands were shaking and sweating, and my camera just. wouldn’t. set. on. photo. it went to video, to slow mo, to god knows what else. it was already getting embarrassing and i was mumbling apologies to niko bc i was sure i’d already taken more than enough of his time. and i haven’t forgotten that kathleen was still there! still staring at us, at me, and witnessing every single mortifying thing!!!!

niko, literally heaven itself incarnate, was so patient though and just chuckled. oh. fuck. me. his chuckle. y’all know his voice is deep af, right? and you know that certain r a s p that comes with it. well, fuck. he did this deep ass raspy chuckle that went straight down to my loins!!!!! christ on a bike!!!! my inner whore was literally about to jump out!!!!! i’ve fantasized about hearing it in person for so long but jesus fucking christ I WASN’T READY. ALL THIS TIME AND MY BODY STILL WASN’T READY!!!! AND I’M DAMN SURE IT WILL NEVER BE READY!!!!!!!!! NO ONE IS READY FOR THIS ATTACK!!!!!!!!

g o d. anyway, he finally took pity on me. he chuckled (i’m on the brink of death here!!!) and reached for my phone to help me take the goddamn photo. he set it on photo (freaking finally, thanks niko) and we posed for the photo. hell, he was so close again. while i tried to smile and look somehow decent, i just had to take away as much detail as i could before we parted.

1. i already said this, but his h a i r. so soft. and houston was freaking humid. while mine was literally about to turn into a bird’s nest from the humidity, the man just couldn’t look fugly if he tried!!! he literally had NO FRIZZ. damn niko, tell me your secret!

2. his stubble was SO CLOSE. every strand? PERFECTION. no words could adequately describe it. and holy shit, his jawline and cheekbones. if i touched it i could literally lacerate my goddamn hand. and he had no pores??? fucking sexy cryptid

3. his c h u c k l e (he wasn’t chuckling anymore, but that shit stays with you till the end of time)

4. HIS S C E N T.

okay. i have a scent kink. i know. TMI. like this whole write up is one big banner for too much fuckin information. but holy shit. HOLY S H I T. until now i still don’t know how to fully describe, and i probably never will succeed in fully conveying what it was truly like (and if my brain embellished some of it; i was really too far gone to know anything anymore), but fuck. f u c k. he wasn’t wearing perfume or cologne, i’m sure of that. nothing too artificial that stood out to my nostrils. probably bc they were going to train under the houston sun and spritzing was wasted and unnecessary. but remember that he was fresh from the shower, so that was basically his main scent. it was very nice, very crisp, very clean. basically, sexy as hell. classy. panty-melting!!!! hell, i don’t know!!!! you know what i mean!!! idk if it’s from the hotel toiletries (if it was, good job post oak hotel!) or if it’s his own (then i need to know niko! what products do you use???). but yeah. clean and crisp. d***y supreme.

and there was also something else. it must’ve been his natural scent. and god. GOD!!!! a bit woodsy (?) and quite sweet. i’ll stop there before i say something that REALLY crosses the line.

so my thumb moves, and we take the photo. ONE FREAKING PHOTO. that’s all i managed. i wasn’t able to look at it until my uber ride to the mall later on, and i really would’ve liked more to take with me and stare at when i’m....lonely. but it was magically HDR, and i looked passable. and niko. again: perfection!!!! now that i know what he’s like in the flesh, nothing else will ever come close. but this does come quite close.

after the photo was taken, i manage to squeak out another “thanks.” niko smiled again (kill me one last time, why don’t you) and squeezed my arm lightly before saying goodbye and finally going up the bus. kathleen could breathe a sigh of relief now.

i don’t know how long i stood there. surely not that long since i still got to take pics with serge, manu, and lewy. but it did feel like forever and i haven’t shaken myself out of it. as i’m writing this, exactly one week later after it happened, i still haven’t shaken myself out of it. i don’t think i ever could.

i’m just thankful to whichever deity made this happen. my houston trip was finally complete (i haven’t met everyone yet at that point, but i just somehow knew deep inside that it would all work out). i got what i came for and more. my extension was not only worth it, but completely priceless. i’ll treasure this whole day and that little moment i got with niko for the rest of my life. that’s for sure.

just to end this, i just wanna say something. i know this was one whole crazy and thirsty post, but seriously. he’s a really nice man. a good man. it wasn’t for more than a few minutes at most, but it felt like forever in my mind. and in that short moment, i just knew he tries his best. i’m a true blue niko stan but even i know he made mistakes. i’m clearheaded enough to acknowledge that. but he tries, and he succeeded. and no matter how calm and cool and collected he always appears to be, you can still see how much it all affects him. hell, he literally grayed in front of our eyes in less than a year. his eyes were a little less bright at the end of the season as compared to his presentation last july. when i gave him that little message of support, i literally saw the relief in his eyes and how much he appreciated it. he and the team have been through quite the ordeal last season, and there are no guarantees it will be easier this time around.

you don’t have to like him, you know. but please. a little basic human respect still goes a long way.

there, i said my piece. and it’s done! thank you, fc bayern, for being so nice and game and all-around wonderful. thank you, kathleen krüger, for staying calm long enough to let me have my moment with niko. and thank you, niko, just for being... you. now here’s the ONE picture i’ll treasure for the rest of my life:

#here it is!!!! it sounds like bad fanfic but it's been so surreal and this is really what it felt like for me don't judge me too harshly pls #niko kovac #niko kovač #fc bayern #bayern munich #fcb #*my crappy shit #mickey meets fcb #my god it's finally done #i'll never do it justice but i really tried #g o d someone just scrape my carcass off the floor thanks #i still can't function properly and i don't think i ever will #on july 21st in the year of our lord 2019 i finally met the love of my life and since then my life has never known peace!!!!!!!!!#B Y E!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#also excuse the typos i'm so drained i can't even proofread anymore

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