#bc i actually know some terminology ;)

[ajarofpickledtears]

once again thinking about how usa centric a lot of stuff on the internet is and how us american experiences are seen or treated as the default so when us americans call out or criticise a specific behaviour of a whole group of people it is completely disregarded that a lot of times even that specific behaviour may be at least somewhat limited to or influenced by being us american

[gizdathemxel]

*gripping my hands so hard on a young trans persons shoulders that their bones are about to break*

do not log on to 4chan.com. do not get involved in passing olympics. you will always lose. do not put afab/amab* in your bio, that is cisgender society trying to know your “real” gender. you do not exist to please cisgender people. there is no ‘right’ way to be trans. learn your goddamn history, listen to your elders. listen to other disenfranchised groups. listen to intersex people and check yourself for intersexism. listen to trans poc and check yourself for racism. listen to disabled people and check yourself for ableism. be open to learning always. labels are meant to fit you, not the other way around. you are not weird or predatory for simply being attracted to others. you’re fine if you’re not a skinny white twink or a barbie doll. you’re fine if your body is ‘weird’. you’re fine if you don’t have heavy or any dysphoria. it’s okay if you actually don’t want to transition or anything like that. life is worth living at any stage, you deserve to be happy. I SWEAR THAT YOU ARE OKAY!!!!!

*ok editing this bc i think there are some major misunderstandings here and also ignorance on my part so lemme clear the air. when i wrote “don’t put tme/tma” in ur bio i did NOT mean to say that discussions around transmisogyny aren’t important or that tme/tma cannot be helpful terminology, and i’m super sorry that it came off that way. also editing bc someone pointed out to me that the original phrasing of this post is very misinforming, so to also clarify, tme/tma was a term invented by transfems to talk about transfeminine experiences which i will admit that i was unfamiliar with the history of tme/tma as a term and was introduced to it through some really bad online queer discourse. but it’s always been of my opinion that discussion around all forms of bigotry, including transmisogyny, are important and need to be had. i explained in a rb, which i’ll link when i have more time, that my issue was with the way the term is used as only identification/oppression olympics rather than genuine nuanced discussion about the ways that transphobia/transmisogyny/transandrophobia/etc function and interact with each other. i advised young trans people to not put tma/tme in their bios, bc i know that the wrong people (not just cis people, but transphobes and assholes who just want to get under your skin) would use any indication of your direction of transition to try and misgender you. or specifically in the case of tma/tme, tell you that your experiences/thoughts are not valid or reasonable bc you were tma or tma.

i realize how not originally clarifying that makes me look stupid (and a transmisogynist), so seriously, i’m sorry for that major mishap. tma/tme are not inherently bad words and you are 1000% allowed to use whatever terminology fits you and your experiences best. so as another word of advice: please do not let some rando on the internet tell you how you should talk about your experiences

(also idgaf if you don’t “log on” to 4chan or that it’s “not a website”, the fact that any of you know that is shameful and upsetting)

[s-4pphics]

the call. I (sevika + vi)

SYNOPSIS: reddit: a place for thought-dumping and being horny [college au] WORD COUNT: 9.5K WARNINGS: this was supposed to be dark but its very crack-ish, sevika and vi play rugby(kinda minor plot tbh), oc is a crazy redditor and wears skirts, STALKING, 90% SMUT MDNI(fingering + phone sex + munching + mult orgasms + dirty talk, tensionnnn) brief mentions of grief and loss bc me, recreational drug use, JUST TOXIC, abby makes an appearance later A/N: WROTE THIS WITH MY BABY!!! @trackinglessons art by lottie my love my light my everything this is a product of #OVULATIONWEEK and the #ARCANETAKEOVER

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       3y

no one likes me. 

i [f18] don’t have any friends. at all. i don’t have anyone that’s not family that likes me and sometimes im convinced my family regrets keeping me adound. i just moved cities for uni and haven’t been able to have a valuable conversation with anyone and im starting to think i’m the reason why. to be honest i’ve always been the “weird” one or whatever ppl at school called me. but i don’t think im weird at all. I think i’m nice but ppl treat me like a germ lol they just stare and whisper to each other but i know they’re talking about me

does anyone have any advice on being more approachable? or whatever i’m not even sure what to call it tbh.

kewlio313 • 3y

Everybody’s weird in college! You’re young and finding yourself. Join some organizations and put yourself out there! It’ll work out kid 

     artkiller OP • 3y

     i wish there was a chess club lol 

Margie • 3y

how do you go about approaching people? 

      artkiller OP • 3y

      i just walk up and start talking about myself

      Margie • 3y

      Okay… and what’s their reaction? 

      artkiller OP • 3y

it’s different every time. sometimes they just leave, sometimes they laugh then leave, other times they’re outwardly mean. one guy told me to ‘shut the hell up bitch’ and i immediately wanted to commit a federal crime(not murder)

      Margie • 3y

      Goddamn lol. Maybe u r weird 

miKrophone • 3y

shut up hoe

     artkiller OP • 2y

     ?? :/

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       2y

Advice Needed

how do you know if you’re mentally ill?

hello fellow redditors. lol. i’m finally back… very odd first term i think i got ghosted or whatever it’s called by some dude on the hockey team but yeah i plotted homicide. i’m pretty sure that situation sent me into a spiral. i think im sick. 

i’m not sure what’s going on with me but my thoughts have been really dark recently. not necessarily suicidal or harm inflicting(on myself) but… yeah… prettyyyy dark. idk. it’s weird what my brain conjures up sometimes. i guess im curious why my brain thinks the way it does. i’m not a bad person and i know that, but my brain makes me believe that i am. idk what to do at this point. i’ve never been to a professional and tbh i don’t think i should because i don’t wanna be admitted somewhere lol 

kewlio313 • 2y

Welcome back kid. It’s often better to seek help even though it can be fucking horrifying, especially in adulthood. Get help and you’ll be fine

     artkiller OP • 2y

     and if i’m not fine? what do i do then? 

     kewlio313 • 2y

To be frank, I'm not sure. I’ve been through alot and even I don’t have clear direction on life. I’ve been allowing my intuition to guide me for some time. Just try it and see what happens. Rooting for you

     artkiller OP • 2y

     thank you 

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       2y

Advice Needed

am i a lesbian?

i [f19] think im attracted to females. i can’t stop staring at their tits. i always assumed my middle school peeping was from jealousy or whatever the hell twitter said but now that i’m grown i think i wanna fuck girls. or like. girl adjacents??? idk the terminology or whatever. 

PetersJoker • 2y

go eat some pussy and find out

     artkiller OP • 2y

     no fuckhead

kewlio313 • 2y

… Girl adjacents? Females? Are you actually 40? 

     artkiller OP • 2y

     is this a dig

     kewlio313 • 2y

     You crack me up. Have you experimented before? 

     artkiller OP • 2y

     i never passed a science class

     kewlio313 • 2y

     … Alright. 

 I meant hooking up. Have u kissed a girl before? Slept with one? Or whatever you youngins say these days? 

     artkiller OP • 2y

     no. i’m not a slut lol i hardly go outside 

     kewlio313 • 2y

Finding out what you like isn’t being a slut. You’re in college for fucks sake. Find you someone to lay with, ya loser. 

     artkiller OP • 2y

     or i should just shoot myself. less complicated then sex

     kewlio313 • 2y

     Maybe so, but they’re equally as messy. 

ButchesForChrist • 2y

Questioning is usually the first sign. Lol

     artkiller OP • 2y

     fuck me

     ButchesForChrist • 2y

     Well

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       2y

what does sex feel like? (wlw)

[f19] just watched scissor porn for the first time. what the fuck was that. (i need it)

MisandristInTraining • 2y

the work of demons aka men

     artkiller OP • 2y

     i drink their blood

     MisandristInTraining • 2y

     Lmao

OnHorseback • 2y

Feels like dying but emotionally • 2y

     artkiller OP • 2y

     i wanna die physically 

     OnHorseback • 2y

     I’m sure some dirty fuck can set that up for you

     artkiller OP • 2y

     lit

kewlio313 • 2y

Welcome to the dark side. 

     artkiller OP • 2y

     flirt a little harder oldhead 

ButchesForChrist • 2y

Ready to come out? 

     artkiller OP • 2y

     of where

     ButchesForChrist • 2y

     Bitch…..

—

__

__

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       2y

home sweet home. 

hello found family. been mia bc fuck school but i’m back… and i think im a sadist. 

does anyone know where rugby originated from? i like watching large women be physical w each other and i wish they would harm me in similar ways. pls push me to the floor and stomp me out(specifically directed to one pink head) i’ve been thinking dirty things all day i need her so fucking bad. is this why ppl r so obsessed with sex? bc of hot people? i get it now. i need her to bend me over and put her cleat on my neck

lezziesthatembezzle • 2y

good morning to u too bitch

     artkiller OP • 2y

     big muscly girls pls rail me from da bck 

     lezziesthatembezzle • 2y

     someone muzzle this thot

Accuntress • 2y

A dyke’s pride and joy: large women. 

kewlio313 • 2y

This is crazily your most normal post. Missed ya. Do well in school

     artkiller OP • 2y

     :3 🩷

[deleted] • 2y

The cards are in my favor 

     artkiller OP • 2y

     would you like to sex through private message? 

     [deleted] • 2y

     What the fuck you crackhead

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       2y

Advice Needed

sex addiction while a virgin? 

is this possible? i shouldn’t have watched ppl with big clits trib. quite criminal. even more criminal when i’ve  imagined the girl i’ve been following around for the past 2 weeks doing it to me

[deleted] • 2y

is this who we are…. 

     artkiller OP • 2y

     obviously. 

kewlio313 • 2y

This is my last straw. 

     artkiller OP • 2y

     hugs xD

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       6mo

i’m confessing. 

idc anymore. i don’t give a FUCK. i am in love. i [f21] am in love. the deepest kind i think. love at first sight truly. it’s the kind of love that’s painful. it kills and leaves behind trails of misery if betrayed or lost. whenever i see her, i cry from happiness. her joy is my joy. her hurt is my hurt. our hearts are forever intertwined no matter the distance. i’m writing this for her. if you ever see this: i love you, darling. there’s not a second that goes by where you’re not at the forefront of my mind. i’ll treasure everything we’ve built thus far, and promise to never take it for granted. i hope to die by your side. 

i love you. i love you so much. 

even if we’ve never spoken. 

kewlio313 • 6mo

Yup… she’s lost it, folks. Very deep sigh. 

     ButchesForChrist • 5mo

     That’s part of being a lesbian. She’ll live. Trust me

—

—

—

“Violet! … VIOLET!”

Why’s Sev always so loud in the goddamn library? The receptionist already has tacks on her behavior chart like some kindergartener. “I heard you! Jesus Christ, I’m sitting right fucking next to you—“

“I wouldn’t haveta fucking scream if you woulda answered me when I asked 3 days ago! Are you coming on Saturday?” 

How does she tell Sev fuck no bitch I don’t wanna go in a polite manner? It’s the first weekend after Christmas break and quite frankly, she's already sick of being on campus. Vi loves her friend to death but holy fuck does she wish she had an off button. 

“Just come the hell on and stop—“

“Dude, I—“

“You know it’s not gonna be fun if you’re not there! Half the bitches are comin’ for you! Plus… I think you could use a fun time after… y’know.” Sevika softens — only a bit, she's still Sevika. Hard ass. 

She does know. At this point, who doesn’t? Her last year of university started on a bad foot when her family home caught aflame with her little sister and father still inside, but the icing on the cake was when her long term, blue-haired girlfriend sent her the can we talk? important text. Now she’s single with corpses for relatives(she thinks her sister would’ve found that funny). Her teammates returned to campus with her; eyes mournful and hearts sunk to the bottom of their stomachs, so prepared to shield and coddle when needed. Sev was one of them: through every breakdown and anxiety attack and hungry but nauseating night. 

“I’m not tryna bring up old shit. You been through a lot and deserve some fun. That’s all I’m sayin’. Get your last bit of jitters out before the season starts.” 

Vi nods. She gets it. Losing her sister was just as much of a loss for Sev as it was for her, but somehow, she was able to ease back into herself. Become… normal again. Socializing takes so much energy outta Violet, now. She’d rather go lift or go sock the shit outta rich person. In some ways, she wishes she had as much willpower as her friend. 

She knows why Sev wants her to go. New pussy, new me, her and Abby once told her, but she’s not in the mood to smash right now. She’ll probably start crying if they don’t kiss both her cheeks before her nose like… Ugh. She shivers in disgust… and extreme longing. She misses her ex like crazy. 

“I know. I’ll, uh, think about it.” 

“M’kay… now what the fuck is epitactic theory.” 

“Girl…” 

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       12mi

Advice Needed

how crazy is it to ask for a threesome from two ppl that don’t know you? 

[f21] i’m currently in my campus library watching my girlfriend study with her teammate from my stiff ass beanbag and i need them both like crack. how do i bring intercourse up without making it awkward or uncomfortable? help asap pls

also i might c her this weeknd she’s going out and i wanna go

CreamTeam • 5mi

Wait … so is she your girlfriend or not?? 😭😭 

     artkiller OP • 2mi

     we have a complicated relationship🩷

     ButchesForChrist • 1mi

     Aka she’s stalking her. Scroll down a little

     artkiller OP • 30s

     stay out my business 

     CreamTeam • 1s

     What the fuck

kewlio313 • 2mi

I thought we were better than this, honey. 

     artkiller OP • 30s

     you prob are. im not

     kewlio313 • 4s

     Deep sigh. 

Your phone drops from your jittery hands and into your lap, screen glowing with every disappointed reply from fucking Kewlio who you’ve grown to love. You like to call them a friend. A faceless, emotionally intelligent, oddly attractive friend who you’ve never met. 

The love of your life is right there, as always. Exactly 34 steps away, past the shelves littered with history novels and biographies, sat at the table surrounded by Liberal Arts textbooks and her star-littered laptop. Black jacket, black shirt, ripped black jeans, hair dyed black: that’s new. Still streaked with pink and somehow you’re even more hungry for her. She’s looked a mess recently: beaten and bruised, coming to class with black eyes and bandages across her pretty nose. It makes you wanna burn down the entire Arts and Sciences building with everyone inside of it. 

She’s annoyed with Sevika, you can tell. They’re talking about something. Maybe her sister, rest in peace. Or piss if she sucked. Whatever. A small part wishes you listened a little closer when she talked about Jinx(weird ass nickname, but okay) so you’d know exactly what to ask. She can take out any aggression or sadness on you anytime. In here, outside. You’d drop ‘em for her wherever. 

Kewlio is a dirty liar. You’re not a stalker. You’re a fan, an admirer, a lover. Your girl’s simply unassuming… How the fuck is that your fault? 

She won’t be like that for long, though. 

Vi lost her cleats a few days ago. Her black and blue ones that are worn the hell down and hanging at the seams, but she loves them. Wears them almost every match despite how unsteady they make her on the field. They’re her lucky charm, besides you, of course. 

Her lucky charm found her lucky charms. 

And by found, you mean broke into her gym locker with the code you memorized 2 years ago and snagged ‘em. She should really get those locks changed before someone takes something important. 

The explanation of how you found her cleats exactly? You’re not sure and you’re not dwelling. She’ll be so relieved that you found them that it won’t even matter. Might even drop to her knees and praise you like a God. Is she religious? One of the minor details you don’t know about her. 

But you’ll find out soon enough. No worries at all. 

You wonder how Caitlyn is doing. 

—

Rabbit holes are either your best friend or worst enemy. Today, they’re straddling the fence. Your brain never shuts off when you're in a crisis. You’re ovulating, overstimulated, and searching for a cure from someone you’ve never said hello to. 

The internet can solve your problems though. Especially if they’re sex-deprived millennials. Their long-term lack of human contact makes for some hilarious stories and useful what-not-to-dos. 

how to finger a vagina 

vagina g spot where is it

where is clit vagina

vagina map

scissoring hacks positions

lesbian sex how to

can lesbians do anal 

is mommy kink a trauma response

Reddit searches are always on your side. All answers to the world at the tip of your fingers. You love the media! Squirting is not pee evidently. PornHub comments are not a reliable source. You should ask your girlfriend if she squirts. 

Caitlyn would know. Fucking BITCH!

how to make girlfriend come

Mansplainer misogynists geeking about making their wives do housework while they sit on their asses and flirt with young Discordians. ‘I clap and she appears’

…

You should craft a bomb that only targets cis-het men because what the fuck is going on right now. 

how to make girlfriend cum

‘[M48] I’ve never made my wife climax and we’ve been together for 15 years and have 2 children’

Your eyes are fucking burning. Is it bad to wish death on a person? Cursed imagery. Your fingers attempt to salvage the last bits of your sanity. 

how to make girlfriend orgasm wlw

date ideas lesbian

am i crazy quiz

insanity quiz

You’re normal you’re okay you’re literally fine. 

mental illness signs for lesbians

what does dying feel lik

“Ma’am.”

You gasp sharply. Librarian. Fuck oh shit

“Hi. We’re, uh, lockin’ up, so…” 

You’re still at the library. How much time has passed? How many rabbit holes have you fallen into? Where’s your girlfriend? Her and Sev are gone… 

But you know where to find your g-spot! Hooplah!

“Oh ye— Yeah! Uhh… bye.” You stand so fast you get whiplash. Your backpack beats against your back when you adjust the straps on your shoulders. Headphones on, music blasting, and just like that, the world is off and you’re on. Right into the darkness of the city. 

You love a stripper’s playlist in times like these. 

You love Reddit in times like these. 

You walk and walk with an extra skip in your step. Time to drive Kewlio crazy. 

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       1s

guys im happy

the joy that i feel rn is unmatched. i love my life. im so excited for the future. thank you god and or universe for these blessings

And post. Nothing could wipe the smile off your face. Nothing nothing nothing you love it here! You love school. You love your girlfriend and her friends and her sport!

“Oof—“

“AH—“

Your back connects with the angles of your hardcovers and fuck you hope your laptop survived that drop. There’s not nearly enough cushion in your bag to cover that fall fuck your life you hate everyone—

“YOU FU—“

“Holy fuckin’ shit I’m so sorry are you ok—“

And your mouth zips. Oh…

Oh. 

Your girl’s in running shorts. Squeezing her thighs good ‘n tight and she glistens with sweat, brows pulled down in concern as she eyes you from above. If the sun was still out, the rays would dress her head like a halo. A heavenly sight. You’d die here… but not before a drop of her sweat falls on your face. You need that at least once. Zooweeema—

“Are you oka— fuck, gimme your hands, up ya go, c’mon—“

Oh she’s talking. And grabbing you. 

Your hands are warmed by skin and your spine tickles when you’re pulled to your feet like a feather. The pain in your back and shoulders don’t fucking matter anymore. Life works in mysterious ways, doesn’t it?

“Hi, Vi.” 

“I’m— hey, uh… do we know each other?” 

We love each other actually! 

“No— I uh, sorry! I go to watch your matches and all that. Kinda a fan… Sorry if that’s weird—“

“No no no no, not weird at all. Uh, very flattering actually. ‘Preciate it.” 

You’re gonna fucking pass out. 

“Are you okay though? Nothing hurts, right?” And your knees wobble when a squeezing hand lands on your shoulder, gauging you for pain. No pain. Just deprived. Needy. Desperate. Touch me some more. 

“M good.” 

“Cool…” Her hand drops and you nearly screech like a banshee, “And your name? Sorry bout t—“

You interrupt with yours and she smiles. Nice to meet you, she says with gravel and your heart grows another heart inside of another heart. Holy fucking you’re boutta

“I like rugby.” 

Kill yourself. You’re boutta kill yourself. 

Vi’s eyes widened before nodding in agreement, “Yeah… me too. If it wasn’t obvious enough. It’s a great… stress reliever.” 

So is sex, according to Sexcopedia.edu. Do me. 

“Really? It looks painful sometimes.” 

She sighs with tension, “It is. We gotta lot of aggressive people playing against us so we have to always… do more. I guess, I dunno. But whenever I’m mad it’s great. Very useful.”

“Are you mad often?” 

“Are you studying psychology?” She pins with an arched, slit brow, but her eyes remain light and friendly. It’s funny, she doesn’t appear to be this approachable with her grunge-ness.  

“Nah. I need to, though. Could do me some good.” 

Her laugh is hearty. Genuine. “Shit, me too. Help me out.”

“Do you wanna be my friend?” 

She seems stunned and you don’t know why. Doesn’t banter create friendship? Whatever. Fuck it. She can say no. You don’t care. You still got her shoe—

“Gimme your phone—” 

Your heart drops to the floor, through the concrete, right into the center of the Earth’s crust waiting to burn and cease to exist. She’s got you figured out. You’ve been exposed and she’s gonna fry you in the middle of the damn street

“—I’ll put my number in.” 

… Oh.

You meticulously make sure your notis are deleted and OFF before handing her your device with the keypad on display. Her fingers are pretty and nimble. Flexible with how slender they are. Pretty hands. Pretty, blue veins and you're instantly reminded of her ex. You hate the color blue. 

She hands your phone back, “That’s me. Hit me up when you get… wherever you’re going. And lemme know if I need to cover your medical expenses for spinal cord surgery.” 

You laugh. Really fucking loudly and she flinches, but smiles after. She’s so fucking cute! Is this flirting? 

���Y-Yeah, I will.”

Her head tilts fondly, “Cool.”

“Cool.” 

She gives you one last look before plugging her earbud in to continue her jog. You check her contact to make sure it’s real and fuck you have her fucking number! Fuck fuck fuck fuck

You leap like the happiest frog in the pond when she’s out of your line of view and a sharp pain whips through your shoulder blades. 

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       3mi

lads i just got proposed to. spring wedding in sweden

number collected. so it begins. 

kewlio313 • 48s

Christ help us all. 

CreamTeam • 10s

Ring pics. 

     artkiller OP • 3s

     cawk ring pics***

     CreamTeam • 1s

     Should’ve fuckin known. I hate you genuinely 

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       30s

when’s a good time to text the girl you’re obsessed with? 

[f21] soooo i’m laying in bed lookignat her contact and idk what to do. i’ve fantasized about this so many times and now its in my lap… im so used to shit going wrong that idk how to react to it going right. it’s kinda late but i really wanna talk to her but idk she might be sleep or whatever. 

should i scale her building and check if she’s awake? :(

—

Vi doesn’t know why there’s a pit in her stomach. She sits on her teammate’s fluffy rug with a smoked out Sevika who patiently waits for her green light, but it hasn’t come. She feels an oncoming breakdown and she needs a babysitter just in case. 

“Finish this for me?” A roach floats in front of Vi’s face before she pushes it away. 

“No.”

“Buzzkill.” 

Sev and Vi sit in silence for 12 seconds before the roach is stolen and hit by the latter. Sevika snickers. Vi drops her head on the couch and exhales her worries through clouds. Stressed, anxious riddled, maybe not the best headspace to get high but fuck it. 

“Whatcha thinking about?”

She shrugs, “Everything.”

“Talk ta me. What’s happening.”

Vi’s face burns when her mind plagues with you. Your giant bifocals and smudged mascara and acrylic-stained hoodies. You had a backpack on… Could be a student here. You might be a freshman. Vi hates making assumptions about strangers but you seemed a little… 

Immature? Your eyes were too shiny to be a senior. 

“You’re gonna laugh…” 

“I’ll always laugh at your stupid ass,” She snickers. “What happened, though, seriously.” 

Wafts of smoke curl around her words, “I almost bulldozed a girl earlier.” 

Sevika scrabbles to her knees with a slack jaw, “WHAT THE—“

“Oh my fucking god can you be normal for—“

“BITCH BULLDOZED? WHAT THE FUCK FREAKY ASS BITCH—“ 

“NOT LIKE THAT!” Vi scoffs, “I went on a run and bumped into her! Fucking WEIRDO!”  

Sevika slumps back on her ass, clearly disappointed, “… Oh.”

Vi tends to the roach until her fingertips burn, stubbing out the burnt paper on Sevika’s ashtray. When she looks up, she finds a very intrigued looking fox. Here she fucking goes. 

“She hot?”

Vi’s sigh is littered with agitation at her friend while she laughs, “I hadta fucking ask! Tell me! She smell good?” 

“I don’t fuckin’ remember! We talked for like… 2 minutes!” 

“2 is enough time to check her out. Show’a hands, how fat were her tits? Like this?” Sevika mimes holding watermelons that are too goddamn heavy and Vi cringes. 

“You fucking disgust me.” 

Sevika relaxes back onto her elbows, legs extended in front of her. Her brow quirks when she catches Vi’s gaze drop to her waist, “Meh. You like that about me.” 

“Sometimes. Not when I’m in a crisis.”

“Meeting a girl is a crisis now?” 

“Yes! I don’t fucking know, she was…” 

Honestly, Vi’s unsure how to describe you. 

“Does she at least go here! You’re not giving me shit to work with.” 

“I DON’T KNOW—“

“DON’T FUCKING YELL AT ME—“

Vi groans with her palms in her eyes, “She just asked to be friends. She told me she watches us play and that she’s—“

“Back the fuck up,” Sevika raises up again, “Do you not see what’s happening here!” 

“…” 

“You’re actually fucking stupid, wow,” She scoffs, “You know she set all that up, right?” 

“… What in the fuck are you talking abou—“

“She ran into you on purpose! She’s a fan bitch!” Sev reaches for her phone on the coffee table, “What’s her Instagram?” 

Vi whines, “I don’t know—“

Before Sevika can cuss her out for the 40th time, she bursts, “I GAVE HER MY NUMBER!”

“… Did you get hers?” 

“…” 

“BROTHER—“

“Shut up! I’m not… I don’t flirt! I don’t know how, not anymore! She caught me off guard honestly.”

“What's her name?” 

Vi sheepishly mumbles your title; it’s slimy the way it curls on her tongue. You were so nice and now she’s setting you up to be pestered by her best friend. 

It’s silent for 3 minutes, only the pittering of Sevika’s fingers on her device while she hunts for you. Another 4 pass before she tosses her phone in annoyance. 

“You sure you weren’t hallucinating? Nothing’s poppin’ up.” 

“You’re so annoy—“

WHO THAT IN THE BAAAAAAACK, WHO THAT IN THE BAAAAAAACK

Vi’s phone screen glows gray with an unsaved number across the top… One with their area code… Sevika watches the number scroll like a hawk. The smile that grows on her face is crooked. And knowing. 

It’s 11PM. It’s not you. It couldn’t be you. 

“That’s your ringtone?” Sevika snorts. 

“Shut up.” Why’s she so anxious all of a sudden? Her sweaty palms aren’t enough to stop her from reaching for the device, though. 

She answers and puts you on speaker. 

“Hello?” 

“…Hi. It’s me.” 

Sevika’s brow lifts in questioning. Is that her? She mouths and Vi nods. Her eyes roll when her friend whispers, cute voice.  

She’ll never say, but Sevika’s presence re-energizes her. Makes her a little more playful, so she teases, “Me who?” 

A beat of silence passes before you start mumbling to yourself, “I’m gonna fuckin’ throw up is this the wrong per—“

Sevika’s hand flies over her mouth to smother her laughter while Vi coddles you; laughs that she’s joking and that she was waiting on your call. Her cheeks burn when her teammate throws her an accusatory look. 

“Do you mean it?” 

“Mean what?” 

“That you’ve been waiting on me?” 

Before Vi can answer, Sev raises up onto her knees and mimes fucking somebody from the back, face slack with faux and exaggerated pleasure. She ignores the sinful jolt in her tummy and flings a throw pillow right at her face. 

“Yeah, ‘course I was…” 

And then it’s silent again. Her muscles freeze with every deep breath you take over the phone. Sevika waits expectantly, talk to her, she says with flapping fingers. 

“Whatcha up to?” 

“… Uhh… nothing?”

Your laugh is featherlight, “Are you asking me?” 

“Maybe?” 

Sevika’s had enough of the tomfoolery. She wiggles over and hits the mute button with a heavy slam. Leans in close while she whispers, 

“Dude, she’s tryna fuck—“

“No, she isn’t—“

“Yes she is, dodo, did you hear how she was talkin’?” Her tone heightens in pitch, mocks seduction, “You were waiting on me, baby?—“

“H-Hello?” Your mumble is drenched with insecurity. Sevika doesn’t give a fuck. 

“See?” She nearly screams, “She’s DJin’ right now—“

Violet shoves her back before unmuting, “Sorry, m’here…”

“… Was it a bad time to call?” You’re quieter now. Ashamed sounding. Embarrassed. 

“Not at all! Sorry, I was smoking earlier, makes me lose my train of thought.”

“It’s okay…” 

“You make it home safe?” 

“Mhm. I was about to fall asleep but then I remembered to call, so…”

Vi catches her smile before her friend can bully her for it, “So, you called…” 

“Yes,” said excitedly. She can hear your smile. Very puppy-like. Cute. Vi jolts when Sev starts snoring obnoxiously fucking loud. She flicks her forehead. 

“Is someone there with you?” 

Both their eyes widen. A sharp hand raises to slap Sevika, but she flinches before it lands, “Sorry. Just my stupid ass roommate.”

“Hi, Sevika.” 

You’re oddly calm…. But why wouldn’t you be? You had no other intent for this phone call other than keeping your promise. They still share a look though; a brief flash of intrigue and skepticism. How’d you know…

It’s not pondered on for long by Sevika before she sings, “Hey, sweetheart.” 

You sound like the wind has knocked outta you. “H-Hi.” 

Sev singles for Vi to pass the phone over to her. She obliges with a hard stare, “I was just passing through, but while I’m here, I gotta couple… questions. That good with you?” 

“Yes.” 

“Good. You single?”

“Mhm. For forever, sadly.”

“Great. Are we at the same school?” 

“Duh. I’m at every match. We’re, uh… graduating together if everything goes as planned.” 

So definitely not a freshman. Just when Vi thought it was impossible to finish college without a chip on your shoulder. You seem to have made it through just fine. 

Despite Sevika’s reputation of being cold-hearted and abrasive with wicked flirtation skills, she speaks to you like you’ve been in her life for years. Gentle. Inquiring. She lays flat on her stomach with her feet kicked up behind her, “What’s your major?” 

“Architectural engineering. What’s yours?” 

“You’re so smart. ‘M doing mathematics. You should tutor me when you getta chance.”

“Sure. Just lemme know when. I’m always in the library, so.” 

“Well, what a fucking coincidence, so are we! You coulda dropped by and said hello if that was the case.” 

“I’m trying to do that now… Am I doin’ okay?”

“Just fine actually. Aren’t you sweet.” 

“I taste sweeter.” 

Sevika drops the phone on the plush rug beneath them. Sits upright with urgency. Gawks at Vi whose jaw is nearly in her lap. There’s hardly any air in her chest. She squabbles for her phone and ensures that the volume is all the way up. Holds the device right in between them. 

“… Swear? I don’t think that’s possible.” Sevika hums at you, holding her roommate’s gaze while her tongue traces over the dryness on her lip. 

“You could find out… Both of you can if you wanna.” 

“‘S that easy?” Sevika rasps, and Vi flinches when her breath hits her mouth. Leans in a bit closer to feel more on her face. 

“Why do you sound like that?” Vi huffs at your genuine curiosity. You’re so fucking cute, fuck. 

“Because you’re turning me on, hon,” Her gaze washes over Vi and her skin burns with trails. “Both of us.” 

“Oh… cool.” You exhale unsteadily. They can’t help but laugh at you. “Cool?” Vi repeats. 

“Yeah. Awesome. I’ve never done that to someone before.” 

“You a virgin?” 

“Yup.”

“FaceTime us.”

“I have a Samsung.” 

Both girls explode into laughter, “We’ll call you, then, Jesus—“ Vi sends an eager finger towards the small camera before you mumble, 

“Who says I’ll answer?” 

Sevika tuts, “You don’t wanna watch us kiss?” 

“I’d rather watch in person.” 

Sevika throws Vi a look and she’s instantly reminded of Abby. Usually, that glance — filled with an equal amount of tenderness of filth — is shared between her teammates and she’s forced to endure whatever nonsense they plan to take out on somebody together, but now she’s here. Sevika’s including her in such a sacred ritual. She’s suddenly skittish, “You’re killing me, baby. Whatcha doing this weekend?” Sev quiets, timbre amorous. 

“Playing Overwatch.” 

“Fuck that shit. Come to Kappa on Saturday. Everybody’s goin’.” Sevika snips down at Violet, and she whines while her fingers dig into her roomie’s tank top. A little closer, and they’re kissing. Just an inch—

“What’s Kappa?”

Vi giggles, “House,” Sevika mumbles against Vi’s mouth, “Frat house. Right off 16th. It's bright blue, can’t miss it.”  

“‘K, I’ll go. See ya there.”

“Wh—“

Three dial tones break through the smoke in the air before the screen goes dark, both girls left stunned and… very tempted to track your location. Maybe pop a titty for your RA in exchange for your room number. Wouldn’t be the first time…

… Is that too much? 

It could be, but you didn’t hesitate to drop bomb after proposition, and the selfish part of her heart can’t help but think you wouldn’t mind two ravenous strangers at your front door. The knowledge that they’d give you everything you needed would be enough for you to allow them entry. 

And the way Sevika’s staring at her… Craving, but careful. She’s so patient. 

It’s been such a long time — two years since they’ve had any physical connection. Drunken nights, quickies in the locker room showers— the distractions from grief were all put on the back shelf when Vi got into her relationship. Sevika’s a sleaze, not a homewrecker — most times, so she kept her hands to herself out of respect, no matter how many times Violet would catch her staring where she knew was off limits. 

Vi can't get to you, but she can get to Sevika. 

So she yanks her close, dissolves the space between them as their mouths collide with heat and a newfound ache for you in the middle. Sevika’s just as rough as she remembers — pushes her down so her back molds to the floor, entangles a cinched hand in her hair to pull and expose her neck to the attacks. She’s got blotches and teeth marks on her throat — the unrestrained and possessive and her stomach flips. She gasps at the ceiling when her nightshirt shreds under a forceful hand. 

She hasn’t had the heart to have sex in months — propositions were turned down on dozens of occasions because her mind couldn’t focus on enjoying. Every second of euphoria gets overshadowed by hollow, unforgiving guilt. 

You sparked something in her with your forwardness, that curiosity that left her aching to read your mind. Her best friend, too, evidently. 

Every movement is fast. She crawls down her torso with intent — fangs sharp where they leave blood down her sternum. Vi’s fingers pry Sevika’s shirt off, her tongue separating from her waist for mere seconds before reattaching. An eager hand fondly moves her friend’s hair out of her face. 

You want it? Sevika’s eyes read. 

Yes, I want it, please. Vi says aloud. Eager with a twisting hand in her scalp. 

Sevika sends waves through Vi with every wrestle her tongue devotes to her clit. She can’t think of anything but Sevika and you and both of you at the same time; on top of her — you sat on her face while Sevika’s fingers drove inside her. She wants her tongue inside you; unrelenting and feverish until you scream and soak her tongue in your sweetness. 

Sevika eats like she’s hungry. She eats like she misses having her like this and that wounds Vi up tight; it sends shockwaves down her legs. Makes her twitch, but Sevika forces her still with a tight grip on her waist. 

Vi curses with fluttery eyes when a finger — then two, circles around the entrance that aches for a stretching. 

They’re heaven sent when they push in. She’s getting fucked like she’s hated and she loves it. She deserves to feel like nothing; her walls are selfish where they encase the digits that bring her to the sun, massage against every sensitive ridge just how she needs. Her mouth spills with whatever energy she has left within her; slurred and drooled fuck yes yeses. She can barely conjure a warning when her core locks tight, right before she explodes. 

There’s wetness everywhere while she pulses through her pleasure, thighs squeezing around Sevika’s head with every satisfied moan that vibrates on her clit. Tells Violet to give her more and to take it take it take whatever she gives her like she knows she can. 

It’s not until Violet starts sobbing and Sevika’s mouth is dripping wet that she pulls out and separates from her completely. She kisses her pussy gently before shifting to help unlock Violet’s knees. She shivers with every peck that’s trailed up her torso to her chest to her neck. 

Sevika laughs when Vi does, choked and clogged, but elated and genuine. It’s been so long since her body’s felt this light. 

“You needed that. Ya look better already,” Sevika cackles. “Can you stand?” 

“Fuck off, gimme a sec.” Vi shoves playfully at her chest. 

—

—

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       3s

guys. 

i love being a liar. it makes me feel alive never let a bitch tell you lying is wrong it literally makes life so much easier!! wishing everyone a good night. 

everything’s going as planned. just one more tally on the board and we’re set

—

—

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       20mi

Advice Needed

it’s been 24 hours and my girl who’s not my girl has been texting me nonstop. 

[f21] hello. im in a crisis but a good one? if that’s possible. long story short im in love but not dating the girl im in love with yet. i took some of y’all’s flirting advice and i think it worked. im betting my life that yall do witchcraft. i barely said anything to her and now she won’t me😝😝😝 and tbh… i think her friend won’t me too!!!!! she’s always asking about my day and asking if i ate and if id wanna eat with her but i always decline bc im not ready physically mentally like i’m gonna combust the second she walks up to me i barely survived our first interaction…… but her friend invited me to a party tomorrow night…….. wtf do i wear to that i’ve never been outside before LOL

might get a train ran on me…… WE’LL SEE FRIENDS 

adding her undies to the shrine🩷 yaaaay

CreamTeam • 14mi

bro is she your girlfriend or not? It’s been years at this point. 

     artkiller OP • 12mi

     yes i mean no or yes :)

kewlio313 • 7mi

Wear something that you wouldn’t wear to your parents funeral. Good luck dear 

     artkiller OP • 5mi

     i would whore out if my family died

     kewlio313 • 2mi

     Good God. 

—

What does genuine happiness feel like? 

You’re unsure how long you’ve been on your beanbag, but Violet and Sevika have been laughing since you sat down. They’re so relaxed around each other, content with silence. Accepting of failure. 

You’re not a jealous person at all. Far from, actually, but something furies from within whenever you see them — or people, in general, gleeful; the desperation to feel. You haven’t had the privilege. Maybe that’s why you cling to whatever you have with Vi. She has birthed a wanting inside you. A desire for connection after spending decades comforted by the sound of your own voice. Or comments under your posts. 

Violet makes you happy. And Sevika might, too. Just as long as she doesn’t get too close to your light. 

You’re standing right behind Sevika. She can’t see you, but Vi can. Her fear is swiftly overshadowed by delight. She greets you with a smile that makes your heart throb. 

Sevika’s gaze wanders down to your legs, that remain exposed despite the weather, 

“You’re not cold?” She asks. Not exactly the introduction you were expecting, but that makes you giddy. Vi must tell her about you! 

“Yes,” You say with ease, “Y'all should come to my room. It’s warmer there.” 

Vi nods after gawking, 2 books immediately tucked to her chest with her bag on her back. Sevika just laughs. She gets it. You like that. 

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       1s

Advice Needed

how do i mentally prepare for sex? (virginity)

literally fucking freezing walking to my room rn with two burly butches that i want to throw me around and i think they’re going to bc they’re not talking to me but the y are very close i don’t want them to see my screen guys im about to have a threesome pls fucking help me

—

“Cute room.” Violet says, inspecting your horror movie posters and stuffed animals. 

“Thank you.” You smile. 

I hid the 14 polaroids of you that I had taped to my door. Hope that makes you more comfortable! 

“It’s just you in here?” Sevika chimes, eyes glued to the small bed up against the wall, right next to your PC setup. You should ask if they game afterwards. 

“Yes.” 

Violet takes her jacket off and hangs it on your doorknob. 

“Already takin’ off your clothes?” You plop down onto your freshly made mattress. Both girls look very stiff in your space; Is that normal? Maybe they’re nervous. 

Both girls laugh the same. “Not like that. It is warm in here.” Sevika follows in Vi’s lead, removing her hoodie and her undershirt is squeezing her and yup those arms are still there those muscles are popping out yup yup yup—

“Yeah. I can’t sleep in the cold.” You pat your bedspread for them to sit… and they do. On either side of you. Vi brought her notebook and pencil. Sevika brought her heavily ringed hands. 

She scoffs, “Me neither. Immune system is worse than a newborn’s.” 

“Do you get sick easily?” 

“Yes. I just got over it last week.” 

“Damn…” 

“Almost got me sick,” Violet pins playfully, skimming through her pages. She erases before rewriting. So so so so smart; too bad both her answers were wrong. You’ll show her the way soon enough. 

“Coach would hate me. Her star pupil’s under the weather, what ever shall we do,” Sevika mocks and you both chuckle. 

“The season starts next week. Y’all nervous?” 

“No—“ “Yes—“

“I’m nervous for games, not practice,” Vi corrects, “I can’t find my fuckin’ shoes.” 

“What shoes?” 

“My cleats. My sister got ‘em for me a while ago, wear ‘em every match for good luck. I don’t remember where I fucking put them though.” 

“Aww, ‘m sorry.” 

Sorry for keeping them in my closet. 

“S whatever. Just gotta get new ones.” 

Small talk is boring as fuck, but it continues between you and Vi. Sevika’s quiet as a mouse; every glance in her direction is met with hooded eyes. She’s very focused on your nightstand drawer. Can she see what’s inside it? You hope so; Maybe your unworn thongs will motivate them to move this along. 

“Awww! Wait, you used to play soccer?” 

You already know all this. It’s on her fucking Instagram for fucks sake! 

“On the junior team when I was like… 10! I was—“

Trash. I kept tripping over the fuckin’ ball—

“—And forgetting to tie my shoes. It was a hot fucking mess!” 

Yup. Same as the caption. 

The laughter between you finally quiets. You count 12 seconds in your head. You raise a hand to place it on the Hello Kitty bandage directly under her eye. 

“What happened here?” 

Sevika’s breathing is very calming. 

“Got in a fight,” Vi mumbles. Poor things embarrassed! “Got socked in the eye.” 

“Sorry,” Your hand rests in your lap, “Did I hurt you?”

“You’re good… still stings though. They gotta good one in.” 

“How’d it happen?” 

“Don’t remember honestly.”

“Oh okay.” 

The conversation ends. Another 12 seconds. 

“So… Did you guys fuck after I hung up?” 

Sevika smiles and Vi chokes in shock. They’re so different. No wonder they’re so close. 

“I— sorry, thought we were studying—“

“Who said we were gonna study?” You stare at Vi quizzingly. 

“No one did. We mighta fucked.” Sevika shrugs nonchalantly. 

“Oh… was it fun? Whatever it was.”

“Ask her.” She nods in direction of the girl whose face is beet fucking red. How cute! 

“Vi… was it fun?” 

Her eyes droop to the pencil in her hand before flicking it nervously. 

“… I guess.” 

“You guess?”

“That’s what I said.” 

“… Okay.” 

Vi sets her book and pencil on your nightstand before releasing a stuttered sigh. 

“Tell me what happened if ya wanna,” Softness wafts off your tongue. 

Vi swallows, “I… uh…”

“Mhm?”

“We… I didn’t…”

“I gave her head til she cried.” Sevika whispers right in your ear; tickling against your lobe and you’re suddenly winded. Vi’s legs twist until one crosses over the other. 

Gave… Oh…

This isn’t new information. You’re 79% sure Sevika was Vi’s first kiss… or you heard something like that in passing, so why does the sudden confirmation make you wanna hide? Curl into your blankets and shield yourself from both of them? 

“Oh… fun.” Your face burns underneath the skin.

“Very.” 

“Yup…” 

“You’re shy now? After all that?” Sevika almost laughs when your eyes drop to the floor. 

“It’s uh, easier to talk when no one’s actually there.” 

“We coulda been if you’d answered the fucking phone.” 

“… Sorry.” 

“It’s okay, baby.” 

Sevika’s captain of the team for a reason; a leader by nature and Vi allows her to despite her anticipation. She's much closer now, the respectful distance she kept up upon arrival now completely shut, her shoulder touching yours, nearly straddling your leg. 

There’s a light tickle on your thigh; Sevika’s index finger barely grazes the skin exposed beneath the hem of your skirt. 

“You’re so stiff,” She whiffs tender against your neck and you choke a noise. 

“I’m … ‘mscaredtobreathe—“

“Don’t be scared,” Sevika’s whole hand caresses your knee, eases you into her, all while Vi mouths at your neck. “Here, wanna know a secret?”

You release the air in your lungs, “Sure…” 

She’ll never tell, so I will. Your head bobs so encouragingly. 

Vi told me something after she showered that night. 

With every buttery brustle against your shoulder, Vi’s hands gently attack wherever they can reach; the plush of your hips, on your thighs, grabbing at your tummy over your hoodie that takes up too much fucking space for her liking. You can’t stop squirming with every taut pull at the pit of your stomach. 

I was sitting on my bed and she came in, and she smelled so good. I was trying to roll up again, but she took my tray and put it on my dresser… 

Roll up? Tray? What what what the fuck is she saying—

And she got on her knees in front of me… and she looked so fucking cute just staring up at me like that, like she’d do anything to make me happy… She’s sweet like that if she’s in the mood. 

She said ‘may I practice on you, please?’… And I said okay… So she pulls down my underwear and treats me so well. You wanna know who she was practicing for? 

Yes, yes, please—

It was you, baby. She kept telling me how good she wanted to make your first time. 

A strained noise chokes from your throat, and Vi smiles against your ear before her lips close around your lobe and it’s too much they’re too much—

Uh huh, and her tongue felt so fucking good on me. Almost impressive… and she loved every second of it. 

Please… please, I’m— 

Listen to that, Violet, she’s so fucking cute, isn’t she?

So sweet, too. Bet she tastes so fucking good. 

She’s so hungry for you, baby, Sevika coos at you, Gonna stop teasing and give us what we want? 

You agree obediently — desperately, with every thrumming cell you can use at the moment. 

Vi’s benign hand rests on your cheek to turn you towards her before kissing you softly. A gentle peck before she pulls away. It’s overstimulating; Vi kissing and touching you like you’re made of glass while Sevika sucks large bruises on the side of your throat. Your nails dig into the muscular thigh that hardly shakes at your grip in attempts to ground yourself, but they fail because you’re about to faint. 

Your sun kisses you deeper, holds your face tighter to keep you where she needs to tongue at your lips. You’re trying to keep up with her, to use the muscle like she uses hers, but you’re falling behind. They don’t seem to mind, satisfied with the fact that they’re gonna devour you regardless. 

And when Vi lays you back nice and cozy against your pillows while Sevika kisses all over your face, you know you’re fucked. 

—

Sevika and Vi take turns kissing you. 

It’s a messy and uncoordinated mess of teeth and saliva, mainly because of you, but you like it. You love it. You hope they do, too. The warmth of their bodies beside you resonates deep in your core. Whenever one of them pulls away, the next is more than open to take her place, over and over. Your thighs are already shaking. 

Your hoodies raised up thanks to Vi’s wandering hands, tucked right above your rib cage. Your stomach jolts when a feathery finger teases at the band of your skirt. 

“You ticklish?” Vi mutters against your cheek. 

“… Nope.” 

“Yes—” She swipes the same finger against your exposed skin and you jump with a giggle, “you are. Liar.”

“Fuck you!” 

“Yeah… I really, really want to.”

She doesn’t give you time to think of a response; just kisses you one last time before climbing onto her knees. Meanwhile, Sevika’s struggling to get comfortable in your bed. She’s essentially on top of you, both her legs wrapped around one of yours. 

“Fucking — small ass mattress! I forgot how much I hate these!” 

“S-Sorry! Couldn’t afford anything else — mmh!”

Sevika reconnects your mouths while the bed dips beside you. Then there’s lips on your tummy. 

Laughter explodes outta you; Sevika can’t help but laugh into your mouth while Vi nibbles at your pudge. Her grin glows on your skin before her tongue glides on your hip. Her attention stays there; sloppy noises from above and below, your gasps swallowed with every bite Vi gives you. 

You hardly register her pulling your skirt down. You’re just colder. And fuzzier in the head. Sevika breaks away to ask, 

“How wet is she?”

Huh— oh she’s not talking to you yup yup—

“Come see.” 

Sevika rises from position and you’re even colder. When she whistles at the spot on your underwear, your thighs squeeze shut… for 000.3 seconds before she pries them open again. 

“Stop I’ll fucking cry—“

“Cry about what? That’s so fucking hot. You’re so cute, baby.” 

“Bro I wanna die—“

Sevika rolls her eyes, “Bust one last time at least, damn.” 

“Can we make it quick please I’m already on the verge—“

“Of cumming?” Sevika purrs.

“Of suicide—“

Vi’s in hysterics. You shouldn’t be this fucking funny. She watches you and Sevika go back and forth with tears in her eyes. 

You bite, “Wonky ass foreplay—“

“I’ll strangle you—“

“I’ll like it—“

Both of you are fucking stupid. Neither of you notice Vi tugging your panties down. She almost starts drooling at the sight of your pussy. Swallows down the lump of saliva before it can drip down her chin. You’re wet and throbbing and pretty and you smell like heaven. 

You gasp when two curious fingers separate your sticky lips; strings of slick cling to Vi’s digits. Sevika watches with an insatiable hunger.

“What do you like?” Vi whispers, and you shrug. 

“I dunno, I’m new here.” 

She rolls her eyes, “I mean what do you do when you touch yourself? 

“I don’t do that.” 

“Never?” Both girls exclaim. 

You shake your head. “I tried once and nothing happened so I just ate spaghetti and went to bed.” 

“Were you wet?” 

Vi’s forbearing with her inquiries, but still, you’re on the fucking spot and you might start sneezing from anxiety. They’re too patient with you; Maybe you’ve been misreading how they were in bed this entire time. You were expecting them to be knuckles deep in every available hole by now. 

You’ve never been so nervous, and for you, that’s saying a lot. “I don’t remember, it was years ago.” 

“You’ve never used toys or anything?” 

“I… No.”

Sevika stares at Vi, and Vi at Sevika, and you at the wall. 

Your thighs twitch when velvet nuzzles at them, Vi’s voice deep as the ocean. “I’m gonna try something, tell me if you like it and I’ll keep going… okay?” 

You can’t formulate a response but your head bounces in approval. A finger applies the gentlest of pressure on your clit and you expel a wheeze. 

“Okay?” Sevika hums from above you, a hand easing underneath your hoodie to massage your breast. 

“Ye-ah—“

“Sit up for me, honey,” She whispers and you obey so she can creep in behind you, your back resting against her chest. Both her hands rub at your chest this time, her fingers massage your nipples while Vi strokes your clit in slow, teasing circles. 

“How’s this feel, babe?” 

“G— good! Great… h-hooray?” How do pornstars dirty talk so eloquently? You’re literally fucking dying right now. Sevika laughs to herself in your neck and your chest burns. 

“Yeah? And this?” She utters right before pressing in, flicking you from side to side and your core squeezes tight. You’re dripping and she watches so closely. 

“Oh fuck—“

“There she is, good girl, just feel what she’s givin’ you.” Sevika rasps against your shoulder. 

You are feeling and it’s too much for your body to comprehend. Your brain’s never been this focused on one thing. On one feeling, especially one this enjoyable. It’s so good it’s so good you love your fucking girlfriend—

“Tell me when you’re gonna cum?” Vi says against your soft skin

“Uhh…? I— oh god—“

“Getting there, baby? Feel how tight you’re getting? I can see it.”

2 ragged inhales and your eyes roll back and your jaw slacks and your nose tickles oh shit—

“Yeah, yeah, give it to me, c’mon—“

ACHOO!

Your thigh squeezes shut when euphoria overtakes your entire system; thighs clamping shut around Vi’s wrist while she giggles and rubs out your pleasure with ease because she’s stronger than you. Your initial efforts of staying as silent as possible were in vain because you’re squealing your little head off. Sevika rests back on her hands and watches like a hawk while you thrash and clench and leak all over her roommate’s hand. 

“Good job. Felt nice, hm?” 

You struggle to nod because you’re still cumming so hard and her fingers won’t cease on you. Your thighs stick together with your wetness. 

“I’m still eating you out, you know that, right?”

Your whines of approval sound wounded. 

You couldn’t see it, but when Vi finally pulled her hand from you, slurping noises swiftly followed, alongside Sevika’s hums of satisfaction. 

Mentally preparing for your burial. 

—

Vi might be obsessed with you. 

She’s back in her original position between your thighs — with Sevika this time because she’s greedy — and fuck she’s never been so antsy to give head. She loves it and she loves getting it even more… at least she thought so. The aliens could come crashing down from the clouds and her first focus would still be getting you to soak her face. 

You’re fully undressed now, minus a sock; its twin slipped off some fucking where but she couldn’t give a fuck. She’s so desperate to touch you again. It plagues her mind; stuffed with everything that she’s learned about you thus far. You sneeze before you orgasm for fucks sake that’s the cutest shit ever —

Can I?

She’s asking you and you’re whispering yes, please and fuck you moan so pretty when she first glides her tongue on you. Sevika allows her to ease you into the feeling, but she stays close enough to see every drop of slick that glides on Vi’s tongue. You’re so noisy and she loves that. All she can think about is how loud you’d be with your face in her pillow and your hands behind your back while she —

Vi! Violet! I’m cumming again! 

You’re a fucking dream. An insane fucking freaky ass dream. 

If anyone were to walk past your room right now, they’d be appalled at the ruckus that permeates through your space; sloppy sucking noises and encouraging praises and dehumanizing name calling that makes you grind your hips faster. You’re nearly riding her fucking face. 

Vi wishes she could see you in entirety; memorize every thrust and wriggle you give into her face, drowning her in your scent and juices and everything she could ever want in this moment. You’re exactly what she needed; a pliant distraction. You turn her mind off so easily. 

Sevika’s greedy and selfish as she raises one of your legs up with ease. You fall back onto the mattress with your back arched to the skies, a cracked wail squeezing from your lungs when another tongue smushes against your clit. Sevika sucks hard at your clit when Vi’s tongue swirls down to meet your entrance. The eager muscle wastes no time to shove inside and catch whatever bursts from you. 

She moves on autopilot; eases one finger past your pulsing heat and your legs start to shake. The digit curls deep inside, plunges into you with vigor and determination to get you there, hits a spot that almost lands her a kick in the back of her head, but she catches you; curls an arm around your thigh to keep you still. 

And the night — or afternoon or morning, none of you remember, continues like that until you’re drained completely dry and your body contracts from memory. 

Hours pass when Sevika and Vi finally start tonguing each other down for your viewing pleasure, and it starts all over again. 

—

r/AskReddit

u/artkiller       1s

2 butches are sleeping next to me rn… 

never let a hoe tell you to stop following your dreams. i’ve been following mine for almost 3 years and now they’re sleep next to me…. 

#HAPPYPRIDE

[redsugarx]

Hanfu in Components: General Garment Terms (pt1)

navigation: hanfu in components 1 2 3.1 3.2 4 5 ...

Attempting to sort of reboot the hanfu in components thing I wrote for Newhanfu a while back in a better organized way, so I guess this is a series? Purpose is to provide a more systematic way for people to learn about hanfu terminology, which is extremely complicated and constantly changing, but has mostly settled into some agreed upon definitions among the hanfu community.

Note: This is probably going to make the most sense for people who have already been interested in hanfu for a little while but don't know the technical terms for what they're seeing in the pretty pictures. If you're just starting out this might be a little overwhelming, especially since hanfu vernacular has variations based on what time period you're talking about and stuff like that! But of course feel free to look at it anyway :>

Here are terms that you'll see a lot when referring to a general type of garment. These are the equivalents to 'shirt,' 'skirt,' 'pants' etc. in English, where it's telling you broadly what kind of a garment it is, but not really any details about its style or what it might look like. I will structure my definition headers as (traditional character)/(simplified character)/(pinyin)(tone) going forward. Also using images from Cloud9 as much as I can bc I don't wanna deal with citing image sources lol, shoutout to our models

WORDS ACTUALLY JUST MEANING "CLOTHING"

衣/衣/yi1 - General term for clothing. More often than not refers to a top/shirt or a robe, but can refer to clothing in general as well, especially in modern usage. The yi radical looks like this: "衤" Basically if a character has that symbol on the left, it’s probably related to clothing in some way.

服/服/fu2 - Also a general term for clothing. Slightly more formal/technical in tone imo. Usually combined with 衣 for 衣服 (more casual everyday way of saying clothing) or with 裝 for 服裝 (more formal way of saying clothing). Think the difference in tone between ‘clothes’ vs. ‘attire.’

TOPS (the clothing kind) & ROBES

衫/衫/shan1 - Shirt, unlined. Refers to a shirt/blouse in modern usage. Within hanfu, refers to a top (usually short, but sometimes long) that is unlined.

襖/袄/ao3 - Jacket/lined top. Refers to a parka-style jacket in modern usage (棉襖）. Within hanfu, refers to a top that is lined, typically on the thicker side. Can be long or short. More often than not it is worn as an outer layer.

袍/袍/pao2 - Robe. Refers to a top whose length extends past the knee. Usually robes are lined, but that’s not a requirement to be considered a robe. There is overlap with 衫/襖; aka a garment can be both a 袍 and a 衫 (long unlined robe) or a 袍 and an 襖 (lined robe), but not an 襖 and a 衫 (somehow lined and unlined at the same time, disobeys the laws of physics and logic, possibly quantum entity). 

深衣/深衣/shen1 yi1 - Literally ’deep clothing,’ also can be translated as robe, but more specific in that shenyi will typically be made up of a ‘top part’ and a ‘skirt part’ that are sewn together at the waist, rather than just being a really long top.

褙子/褙子/bei4 zi0 - Outer layer. Harder to define because it can refer to very different things depending on what dynasty you’re looking at. General rule though, it’s almost always an outer layer on a woman’s outfit.

BOTTOMS (the clothing kind)

裙/裙/qun2 - Skirt. Generally any garment that wraps around a person’s torso and covers the legs. 

褲/裤/ku4 - Pants/trousers. Similar to skirt except there are dedicated channels for each leg, aka there’s some separation happening at the crotch. Can be open or closed crotch, almost always worn under a skirt or robe.

Obviously there's a lot of other terms too but I'll get to them with time! Still a full time student, still learning about hanfu, blah blah blah. But yeah especially the more specific terms I will probably cover in a later post. Hope this is interesting enough for now :>

navigation: hanfu in components 1 2 3.1 3.2 4 5 ...

[tinystepsforward]

automattic vs wp engine mastterpost

adrienne's GitHub recap is probably the best place to see a comprehensive timeline of what's going down. it's been kept up to date. my (very out of date) previous writeup is here.

what's happened/other links

Matt has not logged off, just switched platforms, so there's lots on X/Twitter, Reddit, and Hacker News. it's really not worth wading through.

WP Engine actually filed suit.

the complaint includes some truly remarkable screenshots of Matt trying to blackmail the CEO of WP Engine.

which... personally i would not happily work for someone who just blackmailed me while not even my boss, but that's just me. he hasn't denied this at all, in fact confirming on Hacker News:

I haven't doxxed any private texts from other parties like they have. [source]

and, notably,

I even invited her to my 40th birthday on Jan 11, another text message she decided not to share. [source]

this gives me the creeps. in the context of the rest of the way he's talking to her, and the ways in which he's interacted with women in general, it's. not great.

also he slid into an ex-employee (also a woman)'s DMs asking why she was being mean to him bc he'd never been nothing but nice to her, while also making legal threats. so y'know, pattern of behaviour.

a good writeup of the social side of things

if you don't care so much about the open-source stuff, Steph Lundberg's writeup is, like her previous one on Matt's Tumblr meltdown, pretty solid and people-focused.

Mullenweg has already demonstrated egregious lapses in judgment and abuses of power, it’s just that up until now he’s wielded his power against vulnerable populations without access to high-powered lawyers and their own massive platforms.

a more technical writeup

this one is melodramatic in the same ways Matt was (uses war terminology), which i don't agree with, and which led to some... internal arguments at Automattic. that part's not my story to tell, but a little more on that later. it's a solid writeup of the actual WordPress side of things. there's some seriously dodgy trademark behaviour going on here.

of note: this blogger locked comments on his post:

and then Matt, uh, found a way around that:

wild!

10% of Automattic leaves

that's a link to Matt's blog post. here's an Internet Archive link.

in short, staff were offered a severance deal of the higher of $30k or six months' salary. while that's very generous, it's still very risky in today's tech market, especially (for the same reasons i mentioned when Matt was melting down on here) for people outside the US, people who need the health insurance, or people with young kids. despite that, 10% decided with very little notice (they had two days to decide) to leave.

However now, I feel much lighter. I’m grateful and thankful for all the people who took the offer, and even more excited to work with those who turned down $126M to stay. As the kids say, LFG!

i'm thrilled to see some of my ex-colleagues make it out. i'm keeping the rest who have stayed on in my thoughts. i don't know anyone who's wholesale shilling for Matt.

Matt's been pressuring staff to post in support of him, @-ing the entire company to vote on Twitter polls in his favor, and so on. many of the people who stayed have written blog posts about it, all starting with "I stayed". people on social media have pointed out the very clear pattern of Automatticians jumping into discourse to defend Matt, and it doesn't look good.

i don't have a lot to say about those posts, except to highlight Jeffrey Zeldman, whose "I stayed" post is perhaps one of the more honest ones. (his Rodney King reference was in poor taste, and he... i don't like his role at automattic, tbc) but like. he's nearly 70. he helped shape the modern internet and develop its accessibility standards. he has often put his neck on the line for disabled staff who don't have as much clout as he does. given the financial troubles he talks about and the state of this market and how old he is, i personally have read between the lines of what he's saying in a particular way.

fuck, man. i'm sad. i'm sad for all my friends who are creaking under the strain and watching others leave but who can't do that. i'm sad that many of them are left in teams which are half-empty or divisions where significant senior leadership are just gone, with no time to document what they had in progress.

i'm sad for Josepha Haden Chomphosy, the former executive director of the WordPress Foundation, who was dealing with a personal emergency and ended up having to miss WordCamp US (where Matt started publicly starting shit with WPE). she came back from that to a gigantic fire in the community she's invested a decade of careful, Matt-negotiating, stewardship to, and decided to take the severance offer. she deserved better.

other things Matt's been up to

mostly linking to comments or posts which compile things here, bc it's too scattered otherwise.

blocking people from the official WordPress X account if they disapprove of his actions.

publicly talking about a vulnerability in ACF, a plugin WPE maintains, which could put thousands of sites at risk. this is not normal, and he met with so much horror even from current staff that he deleted his post.

saying he comes across badly because he's "a little ASD", which is driving me personally up the fucking wall. he's never once said it before and he really is turning into Temu Elon.

generally bragging that he still has more planned. jesus fucking christ

continually saying that WPE's suit is against WordPress.org and the community, which is not true. on which note, his pinned tweet is certainly something:

his choice of lawyer is uh. the kind of guy to defend nestle against literal child slaves.

as always, while i think WordPress crumbling will disproportionately affect websites in poorer parts of the world, there are certainly tyrants who are causing much more immediate and potent suffering. if you've read this far, please do send anything you have spare to gazafunds.com.

[creatingblackcharacters]

hi! Im writing a very, VERY futuristic sci-fi story and humanity has gone through many changes including complete change of ethnicity conceptualization (now most people would say their ethnicity is the cityship or planet colony their family comes from, or a subgroup that developed within that, nothing from earth really) and because of this + the fact that through so many generations no ones any one earth ethnicity or culture anymore, everyone is their own unique blend of everything, makes me worry about 'ambigiously brown' characters. I have one character who is undoubtedly Black- im torn on calling her Black in the book bc the narrators (including her) wouldnt have that concept and no one else would have earth words used for their ethnicity or race, but it id a word that we should use more and I dont want to avoid it if you think I could probably just ignore that no one would know that terminology in world. <- sorry tangent. As I was saying shes undoubtably Black, she has dark skin and 4c hair and black hairstyles that will be referred to by name even of her Blackness isnt directly stated, but I have a lot of other characters who are more ambigious in presentation, just due to the way the world works. They have self identified ethnicities and different cultures and practices,,but they arent earth things. Should I change this and make them more clearly earthen ethnicities? I feel bad about that but if thats the way to go ill do it ofc

I have a book suggestion; try reading Raybearer by Jordan Ifueko (you'd be supporting a Black author and a family friend!) This book never refers to anyone as a real world race, as the races within the book are fictional. However, when you're reading it, you get names like Tarasai, Sanjeet, Dayo, Kirah, Thaddace, Kathleen, and Woo In. You get descriptions of the places these people hail from, which take heavy influence from real world groups and ethnicities, including the names of their instruments, design of their clothes, and some of their language. By reading into this, and their physical descriptions, you can tell who is influenced by what general area (e.g. Tarasai is Nigerian, Sanjeet is Indian, Thaddace is Scottish, Woo In is Korean).

Essentially- and I mentioned this in lesson 3, and in the coding lesson (9? 10?)- if you cannot outright call a character Black in your story, you're gonna have to actually know more about us outside of our skin color in order to convey the message that that's what this character is supposed to be! Yeah I'd suggest reading that book- it's for kids, but it's still a really cool read and way to see how we describe ourselves- and study it to see an example of your idea 👍🏾

[purplepixel]

The fact that the anime episode is THE FIRST FILLER EPISODE OF NINJAGO is crazy.

Seriously. 11 seasons where every episode matters (ya even snaketastrophy) and this is the first one you could delete from existence and not miss anything.

Not to say filler is bad btw. I love me some eps where the characters mess around outside of the plot, but there's just something extra meta about the ANIME EPISODE being the FIRST FILLER EP bc it was ANIME that coined the term FILLER. (granted filler also used to just mean recap episodes but hush terminology changes)

They imagined lloyd like really buff for some reason. Im like who are you he-man? Where's link. Also pink hair??? Then I realized they made all the boys hunky LOL

Laughing that they gave kai the same-ish eyes as i do. We both looked at that man and went TRIANGLE. THE TRIANGLE ANIME EYES. (team rocket eyes lolololol)

Zane's design actually popped off, i liked it a lot. Same with nya. I know this isnt canon, but her just lifting the mechanic (?) guy with one arm was crazy. Also ultra violet's design was really good too.

They were cowards with cole and that's all ill say to that.

AND JAY??? HELLO NARUTO GOKU. Thats hilarious.

Tbh this style reminded me so much of the western superhero animated shows. Like justice league, earths mightiest heroes, avengers assemble as opposed to anime...didnt help that fugidove framed it in a stereotypical superhero way. Speaking of fugidove.

Pixel 🤝 Pixal: who the fuck are you?

Overall i liked it for the novelty more then anything. Just seeing them attempt to unlego them was...something else. Also jay. *wheeze*

This episode was so stupid

[catboybiologist]

Hi! I’m CatboyBiologist.

Formerly a femboy, now a trans woman just starting HRT, and a PhD student in molecular biology. I started using this online persona as a fun, shitposty way to explore gender a few years ago. I post selfies (generally sfw, but somewhat sexy, so minors and ppl who don’t like that have been warned), rambles about science, tutorials and advice from the stuff I’ve learned by being a femboy in the past, nature pictures, stuff about the ocean, my adorable grumpy little tortoise, and unsolicited opinions on random nerdy topics. Any pronouns are fine. I don’t plan to socially transition for a while, and still present as a man most of the time, so I’m used to whatever you wanna use for me (for now, I’ll update this if that changes). Please send me pictures of your pets or other cute animals in your life!

As a scientist, I’m also documenting my transition! This google sheet will be updated at least monthly. I also have additional metrics I’m keeping to myself, and pictures that go with this, but I’m not sharing them publicly yet. Keep in mind that this is just one person’s experience with HRT, and may not represent universal trends!

Adding a little something here, bc I think it was an interesting bit a writing: if you want to see me respond to a transphobe about what "biologically female" means, here's a thing I wrote about it. CW for transphobia and discussion, obviously.

Also, if any of my measurements look weird, its entirely possible I fucked up. Let me know if anything looks off!

Here’s some of my favorite pre-HRT pictures:

If you want to see more of my pre-HRT selfies, browse the “femboy” tag on my blog!

And as of this writing, I’m only 2 days after the start of HRT, so here’s a picture with my tortoise that’s technically post-HRT (but with 0 time for actual changes):

If you want to see my future post-HRT selfies, browse the “trans selfie” tag on my blog!

Also here's another really cute picture and fanart of my tortoise by @whalesharkcat:

I have affectionately given my tortoise the title of The Grumpus.

I also wrote a couple of tutorials and general vibes about being a femboy before I started HRT:

Sometimes I make shitposts of myself, I don’t take myself too seriously:

This includes the way I came out on tumblr:

And here’s an overly serious, long ramble about trans thoughts and things that I wrote shortly afterwards:

Later addition: Someone asked how I take selfies, so I wrote a quick and dirty guide with some tips on how I do so in response to their ask:

Oh yeah and apparently I was a 196 microcelebrity? I never to thought I was popular enough for that but apparently some people do 🤷‍♀️. So uh, hi 196 tags, I'm abusing you for my pinned post LOL

As for terminology, I personally do think of myself as a “man who is becoming a woman” as opposed to having always been a woman. If that doesn’t resonate with your experience, I totally get that! But that’s why I freely call pre-HRT me a femboy, while still calling post-HRT me a trans woman. I’m also keeping the blog name as CatboyBiologist for the forseeable future, because at this point, Catboy just seems like a gender neutral term to me.

I’m also trying to put together a script for a podcast regarding how studying biology influenced my perspective on sex and gender- lmk if there’s any interest in that! It’s probably gonna be way too long and indulgent but oh well.

So uh. Yeah. I don’t end these types of things well. Byeeeeee

[spoopdeedoop]

hi i have some disorganized thoughts/hcs abt the found family human doctor au

(one of the thoughts being i should really give it a better name. another being YES this is only the nuwho doctors atm bc that's the only series i've watched so far apologies. if i ever get around to watching classic who i will add them trust)

BEHOLD my random, not at all in-depth headcanons

nine is the only one with a car out of all of them. they all keep bugging him to drive/pick them up from places -- he has mixed feelings about being the assigned taxi driver

both twelve and eleven are teachers -- college professor and preschool teacher respectively. twelve's students love them because he will say the most stupid, hilarious shit with a straight face without even knowing and eleven's students love him because he is the only teacher at the school that will dance with them during musical chairs (he doesn't even play the game. he just dances)

i want to make one of them an actual doctor but i don't think any of them could handle it unfortunately

they all share an an apartment flat on the same level -- nine, twelve and fifteen live in one room, ten, eleven and thirteen live in the one across from them. of course there are other people in the building too but they're all used to the strange loud hyperactivity of that particular flat. i think i'm using the right terminology here. yall know what im talking about

(i'm so tempted to make some companions be their neighbors)

nine and ten are the most insomniac of all of them, so they're used to bumping each other in the dead of night on their way to raid each other's respective fridges or something. very rarely thirteen will join them and they're like "WELL FANCY SEEING YOU HERE"

twelve does sleep, but like. he's nocturnal

eleven and ten hate each other in a sibling kind of way (see: day of the doctor). they are constantly sending each other death threats or tripping each other over. everyone is sick of it

sometimes when they're out shopping you'll hear ten yell "GET OUT OF THE FROZEN FOOD YOU NUMPTY WE ARE NOT BUYING FISH FINGERS" over the aisles and you'll hear eleven whine "WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH" back

(if you're lucky you'll be able to catch fifteen mumble "why did we put them in the same apartment. are we asking for an eviction notice")

eventually eleven will pick a random stray cat off the side of the road, take her home, and name her bowtie, which is a stupid name, so everyone just defaults to calling her kitty

kitty's favourite person is twelve, to eleven's absolute despair

(my original idea for this was to initially have ten hate the idea of living with a cat, since he's stated full on in the show that he doesn't like cats, but apparently there is some very obscure doctor who comic run in which he falls into a depressive spiral and adopts a cat whom he names rose-the-cat, so he might actually like cats idk?)

anyway ten hates her until he doesn't lmao. he vents to her when there's no one else home and she will Stare at him back and it is a very nice friendship

kitty and nine watch shitty romcom together

they have a joint groupchat together -- half of it is just thirteen and fifteen assigning everyone outfits they find on pinterest and the other half is eleven asking where everyone went (he keeps getting lost when they go out)

nine doesn't know how to download pictures off the internet and so resorts to manually editing memes together to send to the groupchat and everyone's like "girl that's so much more effort........."

(yes he doesn't know how to press save image to camera roll but he knows how to use a photo editor flawlessly. such is the logic of the idiocy of the doctors)

eleven and thirteen get along very well i think. they're the only two of the group to play video games and so they bond over that. they also have ridiculously similar clothing taste

sometimes they'll succeed in getting fifteen to play pokemon with them and then they'll proceed to not see him until the next day when he comes out of his room and goes "you didn't tell me plusle couldn't evolve i've been levelling it up all fucking night"

friday is assigned movie night (it's always big hero 6)

eleven is the only one to actively seek out physical affection, usually really abruptly like clinging to thirteen's back as she passes him in the hall or bapping ten with the palm of his hand until he sighs and gives him a hug. he does expect a platonic kiss on the forehead from anyone before he goes to bed and will complain if he doesn't get one

anyway thats it i'm sick in the head and really sad. if this keeps up i may be forced to actually write a fic

[winwintea]

dreamies as your disney world boyfriend

pairing ▸ boyfriend!dreamies x reader author's note ▸ i am working on the SERIES I PROMISE GUYS... it's just quite long... oops. i needed to channel my inner disney for inspiration for this sorry. the prompt seemed to make more sense in my head so i guess it's just, 'dreamies at disney' now lol. ALSO SOME DISNEY TERMINOLOGY in there i apologize. should make sense but if it's confusing ask me lmfaooo

mark lee

photographer boyfriend obviously 

doesn’t even complain about how many photos you want to take

is actually dying inside but hides it away with dad jokes to cope with the pain

“it’s not even noon yet and dis-knees are killing me bro” 

will only complain about the heat 

“It’s like we’re on the surface on the sun dude… like satan’s armpit. that’s crazzzzyy.”

you couldn’t help but laugh

but then he just KEPT GOING

“it’s like we’re in the inside of a mouth… there are things sticking to things that-” 

and you cut him off right there.

can’t help the fact that bro is a D1 yapper.

will not wear mickey ears though no matter how much you beg him to :(  

favorite ride: slinky dog dash

least favorite ride: dumbo

huang renjun

the boyfriend that actually disney bounds with you

so y’all are disney bounding as nick wilde and judy hopps from zootopia (renjun’s idea)

chenle took him to shanghai disney once, so he’s a big fan of duffy and friends

oh how disappointed he was when he realized that the mascots don’t exist in WDW

“preferred parking? i would prefer parking to be free, thank you very much.” 

mood is very sour upon entering

“i know you’re cold but i did tell you to bring a jacket.” rude.

however once you two start collecting your first character signature he’s locked in

somehow more excited to meet the characters than the kids are? (ur 24. reality check!)

he gets more into it as the day goes on

YOU BET HE’S WEARING THE MICKEY EARS. 

although he already had fox ears on to begin with anyways

favorite ride: mickey & minnie’s runaway railway

least favorite ride: seven dwarfs mine train (it was too short)

lee jeno

foodie boyfriend 

wants a turkey leg like really badly 

“that guy has a turkey leg… sir- um sir- where did you get that turkey leg”

you have to bribe this man with food.

which honestly is okay by you because you just wanna take photos of the food.

"yknow with this ride being 50 years old, you'd think they could've made the boats a little bigger. have to man spread now" 

whatever you’re thinking of, that’s literally not what he meant. 

he’s an innocent lil guy. (seriously, it just came out wrong.)

holds ur hand on all rides. 

let’s you grab onto his muscles arms while you are nervous on the thrill rides

no mickey ears though. (it’s the bow that always throws them off)

favorite ride: rise of the resistance 

least favorite ride: teacups

lee haechan

out of pocket boyfriend who will not stfu

“bambi’s the only movie i really couldn’t watch… i could not be as strong as bambi” 

after you give him the, “wtf” look he just continues. on.

“cause if my mom died well… there goes my friend group.”

will randomly start singing disney songs in the middle of waiting for a ride. 

in those show/ride/attractions he’s the only one clapping and screaming. 

especially true for the beauty and the beast sing-a-long attraction, cause yknow he’s gonna scream his lungs out.

yeah he’ll wear mickey ears, but you bought him a goofy hat instead. It was more fitting.

“can’t believe disney made a character after me… should i sue?”

also complains a lot. way too much.

“EPCOT? more like every person comes out tired.”

favorite ride: pirates of the caribbean (he kept making a booty joke over and over again)

least favorite ride: toy story midway mania (bc he lost)

na jaemin

hardcore boyfriend photographer (pt 2) + ‘mom’ boyfriend

man knows all your best angles and where to take photos

“picture, picture over here… yes yes right… in front of the castle angel. oh that’s so pretty… in… in… down… up… okay! smile!”

you two spend like half the day taking photos, jaemin needs to show off his gf ofc.

cares for you the whole entire day, makes sure you drink enough water

aggressively refills your waterbottles every second he gets. 

“when it doubt, chug it out! (cue jaemin chugging his own bottle)

he unfortunately will not wear mickey ears. (jaemin i believed in you.)

he’s not the one being taken photos of, so no mickey ears for him.

“princess i don’t wanna hear it. the humidity is good for you. this is like nature’s pore declogging.”

favorite ride: frozen ever after

least favorite ride: none (bc he did everything with u <3)

zhong chenle

in between buying you everything and calling everything too expensive boyfriend

HOW THE FUCK DID HE GET A MEMBERSHIP WITH CLUB 33.

this man pulls you into that sus green building on main street, and your jaw drops.

club 33, is an exclusive, membership only restaurant at disney. it’s like an elite society filled with rich upper class, but at disney. (never been inside not sure how to describe it but oh boy is membership expensive.) the waitlist got so long in 2007, they closed it for 5 years. look it up on wikipedia disney lore goes hard

“i just asked a couple of friends, and they recommended me this place.” boy.

you’re panicking because you’re severely underdressed. (you’re in a jessie costume.)

he reassures you, since you’re at disney, and being dressed like this is normal.

once u have one of the most expensive meals of ur life, chenle drags u to every single thrill ride.

he also buys you a balloon and a bubble wand <3

but for some reason when you arrive at the gift shop he realizes he’s spent a lot.

“okay enough gift shop. look away from the gift shop. this vacation already has us in poverty.”

AND BRO ACTS LIKE THIS THE WHOLE TRIP IM NOT KIDDING.

he’ll buy you a nice meal at one of the restaurants and then…

“we’re not getting churros they’re 5 dollars.”

no mickey ears either why do you even ask

“next time i’ll take u to shanghai, it’s better okay?”

favorite ride: tower of terror

least favorite ride: it’s a small world after all

park jisung

anti-disney everything boyfriend

gets frustrated at everything. cannot read the map.

when he goes on small world…

he severely questions his mental sanity. like actually guys i think he needs help.

“this ride is for kids.” 

the ride in question: the barnstormer! a 40 second kiddie roller coaster that has top speeds of up to 25mph!

literally jisung’s 13 reason. 

he was screaming his little heart out poor baby.

“I’m not wearing those. Stop.” you do not stop. “Take these off of me right now.”

he wears the ears for half of the day though so a win is a win.

“we’re going to the other park? we’re not going home? there’s 3 more??????”

favorite ride: none

least favorite ride: all

[agaypanic]

Hey :) I was wondering if since it’s a leap year you would maybe write a oneshot or blurb or smth with James Maguire x reader (maybe like Quinn!reader from your series??) where she proposes on the 29th of February bc it’s a tradition that comes from Ireland?? I just think it would be so cute bc he just totally wouldn’t see it coming and I’ve never seen anyone do it in a fic before

Leap Day (James Maguire X Quinn!Reader)

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Summary: You, the girls, and James are now well into your twenties. Life is perfect, except for one little thing that’s been on your mind. After taking with your friends about it, you figure you should take matters into your own hands.

A/N: won’t put it on my series masterlist, but this could be seen as an epilogue of sorts to the fella series (even tho it’s not finished yet lol) but obvi it can be read as its own thing. Also im american so sorry for any terminology and such i get wrong. reader, james, and the girls are obvi aged up

***

If you had told your younger self that you and your friends ended up staying in Derry after finishing school, she would’ve thought you lost your mind. All she thought about was graduating and leaving home, traveling the world, and escaping her pain-in-the-ass sister Erin and somewhat crazy family.

But if she saw the life you had now, she’d probably understand. Because you had everything you truly wanted.

You had a nice little job close to your flat where you managed a bookstore. It was a quaint shop that became a frequent stop for some of the local teenagers. Erin also stopped by every now and then to boast about what she had already read.

When you weren’t working, you were with your friends. You were a bit more tame than you were in your adolescence, but that all usually went out the window when Michelle got a drink or two in her. Which happened often.

But the best part of your day was when you’d go home to see your boyfriend of many years, the love of your life, James Maguire.

“So, what’s goin’ on with you and him, anyway?” Michelle asked as she messily poured everyone a glass of wine. Every now and then, you and the girls got together for a night to get drunk and catch each other up on anything that happened since the last time you’d gotten together. For some reason, you and James were a bit of a hot topic tonight.

“What d’ya mean, Michelle? You know what’s going on with us.” You laughed, taking your wine glass from her.

“I mean, when are the two of you getting hitched? Has he even popped the question to ya?”

“Believe me, Michelle, you’d all be the first to know if we got engaged.” You said a bit glumly, downing your drink and waving your glass around for Michelle’s attention to fill it again.

“He still hasn’t asked you?” Clare asked with an incredulous look. From the start, she had been a big supporter of your and James’ relationship. If it was up to her, you’d probably have a few kids and a house in the countryside by now. “You’ve been going out since we were sixteen! And you just turned twenty-five a few months ago, didn’t you?”

“Yup.” You responded, popping the ‘p.’ “Nine years and no ring.” You held your bare hand up to prove your point. “But I don’t mind too much. As long as we’re together, that’s really what matters.”

“Aw, that’s sweet.” Clare cooed.

“It’s shit.” Michelle countered.

“Michelle’s right, Y/n,” Erin said, grabbing a crisp from the bowl in the middle of the table. “You’ve been waiting for James to propose since we finished at Our Lady Immaculate; admit it.”

“Have not!” You laughed at the absurdity of your sister’s sentence, but the looks everyone gave you made it die down. “Okay, maybe a little. But not seriously! It was just like a dream, you know? Like Erin thinking she’ll get published or Granda thinking Ma will actually divorce Daddy.” 

Everyone giggled, except for Erin, who was grumbling about your little jab.

“Be serious, Y/n!” Clare laughed, patting your hand. “You’ve been waiting for him to ask for a long while.”

You looked down at your glass, swirling the wine around with a sigh. 

“Maybe a bit.” You answered quietly. It hadn’t really nagged at you too much until recently. After all, you had been together for almost a decade, and everyone else around you seemed to be getting engaged or married. You loved James; truly, you did. But it felt like you were missing out a little. “But I’m fine with waiting.”

“The question is, Y/n, how long are you gonna have to wait until he actually does it?” Erin asked, leaning forward to stare at you. You shrugged, not really knowing the answer and not really wanting to respond.

“You might as well ask him, Y/n!” Your cousin Orla said with a grin. She was always an optimist. “He might just be scared you’ll say no!”

“You know, now that you say it, that’s probably why he hasn’t asked yet,” Michelle said, taking a sip from her wine glass that had been filled more graciously than anyone else’s. “After all, James is a pussy.”

“Don’t call my fella a pussy, Michelle!” You reprimanded, yet you still laughed along with everyone else.

“I can call my cousin what I want. And the fact is that he’s a pussy!”

“You know, that’s not a bad idea, really,” Clare said when everyone’s chuckles had died down. She gasped. “This is a leap year! You could ask him on the twenty-ninth!”

“That’s next week, Clare.” You said a bit nervously. Of course, you’d marry James in a heartbeat. But the thought of proposing, especially so soon, made you a bit sick to the stomach. Now you realize why James probably hasn’t asked you yet.

“It’s either next week or another four years, Y/n,” Michelle said with a teasing smile.

You gulped, feeling everyone’s eyes on you. As you thought about it, you had to admit that it wasn’t really a bad idea. Sure, you had less than an ideal amount of time to plan everything out. But you could probably get something small but nice together.

“Okay… Who’s going ring shopping with me?” The girls squealed at your question, getting up to surround you in a drunken group hug.

***

It was the twenty-ninth, and you were a nervous wreck. The ring weighed heavy in your pocket as you paced around your dining room. Dinner was sitting waiting on the table, and you were playing your little speech of love over and over in your head. All you needed was James, who should be home soon. But as the minutes ticked by, you wished the clock would freeze so you could have more time to prepare for this.

“Darling, I’m home!” James called out as he opened the door, and you realized you were out of time. You skipped out to the front hall to greet your boyfriend.

“Hi, Jamie.” You cooed, giving him a hug and kiss on the cheek before stepping away so he could hang up his coat. 

“Sorry I’m a bit late, needed to finish some things at the office.” 

“Oh, that’s okay, hun.” You waved your hands, both to dismiss his unneeded apology and to get rid of some nervous energy.

James gave you a quick peck before walking off to the bedroom to change, leaving you to overthink a bit more. You wanted tonight to be perfect. James deserved nothing less than that.

To pass the time, you grabbed a candle and placed it in the middle of the small table, finding a lighter to light the wick.

“It’s so nice to be home,” James murmured as he walked over to you, arms slinking around you to pull you close to his chest. He buried his face into your neck, leaving a kiss or two before taking a deep breath. “Dinner smells good.”

“Thank you, Jamie.” You turned your head to kiss his cheek before pulling away from him. The two of you sat down and started putting food on your plates.

You talked about anything and everything, James leading most of the conversation, which you were grateful for. You felt that if you had to talk too much, you’d either stutter too much or end up spoiling your surprise. James held your hand most of the time, playing with your fingers absentmindedly as he talked about something amusing that happened at work.

Eventually, your plates were clear and your cups were empty. James was finishing up a story about something a few of his lads had done while they were all watching some sports game you didn’t know much about. You knew that now was your time.

“Jamie?” He hummed, perking up at the sound of his name. 

“Yes, love?”

“I love you.” You didn’t really know how else to start.

“I love you, too, N/n,” James said, smiling as he squeezed your hand.

You took a deep breath, about to give the speech that you’d been preparing in your head.

“I’ve known that you were the one for me since we were fifth years. Probably since I first saw you at the bus stop. That’s probably crazy, knowing something like that so early and so young… But it’s true.” You laughed, thumb sweeping over his knuckles. “These have been the best years of my life, being with you. And it might be a bit selfish of me, but I want more of them.”

“Y/n…” James whispered, tilting his head. “What are you saying, darling?”

“We have a bit of a tradition here.” You say, wiggling your hand from James’ grasp and standing up. “Ladies’ Privilege, Bachelor’s Day, whatever you fancy calling it. Where on Leap Day, girls can propose to their fella.” You stuck your hand in your pocket, fiddling with the ring. “And seeing how it’s Leap Day now, and I have a ring and all, I guess there’s just one last thing to ask.”

James’ expression turned even more stunned when you got down on one knee, now holding the silver band up in front of him. 

“Will you marry me, Jamie?”

In the few seconds of silence after that question, you could feel your heartbeat in your ears. He looked at you stunned, and you desperately wanted to know what was going through his mind. How long would you have to kneel on the ground for him to give you an answer?

But then he smiled brightly, and all your worry slipped away.

“Of course, I’ll marry you!” James slipped out of his chair to join you on the floor and grabbed your face, giving you a long and deep kiss. You gripped his curls in your free hand, the other resting on his shoulder. When he pulled away, he let out an airy laugh. “I never thought I’d be the one being proposed to.”

“Well, there’s a first time for everything.” You giggled with him as you slipped the band onto his ring finger. “Happy Leap Day.”

“Happy Leap Day, indeed,” James said before kissing you again.

[starstruck-sillies]

hi, non-system here, what makes being an endo invalid in your eyes?

More than anything, it's their insistence that whatever they're experiencing is "so similar" to CDD systems. Many of them say they're pretty much just the same, and while some do understand that's not possible, even they seem to think it's similar enough to treat them as the same.

The main issue we have is their constant demands to keep the endo and CDD communities super super close together, and insisting on sharing damn near all terminology and most spaces. I have no issues with them sharing some terms (like littles or headmates for example) but their constant need to make our terms mean whatever they want them to mean is super irritating.

Plus, with them constantly trying to push their experiences closer and closer to ours, it really feels like they want to minimize the number of exclusive spaces as much as possible.

I've been in a few pro endo communities, just to see what really goes on there and if we were wrong about them, and every time, without fail, we leave feeling honestly grossed out and even more anti endo than before. We've never really felt safe in a single on of those so called "safe spaces". It's hard to remember specifics (thanks osdd for ruining our memory /s) but I remember one of the main things we noticed was a lot of them seemed to almost look down on CDD systems. We've seen them claim that "tulpamancers know more about being a system than any other kind of system, they're sort of brain-hackers" (paraphrasing, but we have seen people unironically claim this) lots of "Silly traumagens suffering from systemhood, it's so awesomesauce" and even outright encouraging harm (One specific instance I vividly remember is a whole bunch of them encouraging someone to "create an alter" despite them just saying "Ohh I wish I could, but if we make more than 7 then the system collapses" ((?????????????)) and making it very clear that whatever the "system collapse" is, it's definitely awful for them to go through)

It just always felt like our experiences were always ignored in favor of some endo, it always felt like they're the "favorites" if I had to describe it.

Truthfully, it always felt less like a "let's all come together with these similar experiences!!" type of spaces, and more just endo experiences of any kind overshadowing CDD experiences to me. I could've just been misinterpreting, but honestly with how many stories I've heard of endos trying to convince systems experiencing obvious CDD symptoms that they're actually endos, and the fact that we've been personally told we were a median system on several occasions despite that definitely not being the case, it's really hard for us to see it any other way. It always felt like endos, ESPECIALLY created plurals, and even more so for "tulpamancers" specifically, were put on a pedestal and treated as some kind of "gold standard" for systems of all kinds almost. Again, it's entirely possible that I've been seeing things the wrong way, but that was always how it seemed to me.

We've really only ever really had one genuinely good and enjoyable interaction with an endo before from what we remember. We try to be open, but every time we go running right back to the antis again bc anti endo spaces are really the only system spaces we've felt safe in. Sure, we have our all-syscourse stances server, but that's exclusive to CDD systems/sysplexes, and we're the owner of it, so we're actively cultivating the community in a way that makes us feel safe. (I will say, despite generally feeling VERY uncomfortable in every pro endo space, being in a space with pro endo CDD systems and no endos is much better. Still not as comfortable as anti endo spaces, but much more tolerable than endo spaces from our experience.)

Sorry this ended up being ramblely lol, but I feel like it's relevant at least hehe

-Milkyway

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

uh hi. got some few followers because that LSN post. some points of housekeeping:

this blog rare contained little space where actually safe when wider autism & disability community very hostile to people like me. n whenever people follow me because of posts not about severe disability / level 2&3 HrSN nonverbal autism, some new people don’t know what going on & sometimes do stuff that make this space feel unsafe. you’re more than welcome to stay as long as you follow housekeeping & have general respect

1. not written by me but read this

& do search in blog for intellectual disability too

2. use stuff like autism levels & nonverbal & impairment & deficit language & severe autism & severe disability & visible autism here to describe self & have friends who also use them. while not use for self, also have friend who been called low functioning & also call themself that. you not have to like all that for yourself but don’t police what we call self don’t tell me “um actually this is ableist… but of course you call yourself whatever!” uh. we know. basically if you uncomfortable to even see these language my blog not for you.

eventually will have actual post about this instead of respond to someone rude who blocked me after this n so blocked back… but for now this will do (probably used to have one but too tired find right now)

3. 99% time post about above topic. n blog center people with those experiences & decenter LSN level 1 mild whatever language use. reflect on your experience n who you are n your privileges n your advantages bc we all have some yea even me

4. because do experience stuff post about they not just words… no empathy, can’t mask, have very bad theory of mind, often don’t understand other people exist not to mention have different thoughts feelings knowledge experience than me. am bitter a lot, mad a lot, angry a lot. think in extremes, n immediate write what think, immediate post what write. can be angry aggressive without realize n even if do realize, can’t really do anything about it. basically have level 2/3 autism have big communication struggle have big cognitive struggle & act like it

5. don’t tell me you relate to what am saying unless am know you. keep have problem of people think they experience same thing am talking about but actually turn out very different whole other world n am wish can be like them. sorry to people am not familiar with who genuinely understand n relate but please understand need this

6. am just one random nonverbal person with level 2/3 autism & higher support needs & severe disability online. human. so make mistakes. n have bad takes like anyone. don’t treat me as write universal truth never wrong

7. oh something important. no “going nonverbal” “nonverbal episode” “sometimes nonverbal” etc

should update all this on pinned

tone sound annoyed pissed off because kind of am… but not because of this so not at any of you all not personal

[nickel156]

THIS IS HILARIOUS!!

You make a reblog and then block me so I can't respond. 😆 💀

Tell me you have no leg to stand on without telling me you have no leg to stand on.

In one of SJM's most recent interviews. She says her plans from the beginning haven't changed. So I can go back to previous interviews she's done and her old Pinterest, because they still matter. You can ignore Sarah J Maas and her narrative but I won't.

A FREE bonus chapter that you can read online is a money grab 😆

I'm sorry for the non English readers, but the bonus chapter is canon, just because you didn't like it. Or some people haven't read it, doesn't make it not true..

When the author says she left breadcrumbs in the BC and we get mating terminology for Gwynriel. That makes it very real.

Debunked?? I'm laughing my ass off at this! Because Elriels haven't debunked shit.

All Elriels do is come up with convoluted theory after theory. No actual evidence from said books you claim to know so well.

Saying Gwyn is a lightsinger who lured him there is not debunking. It's a theory, so you can gaslight yourselves even further.

Theorizing and debunking aren't the same thing 🥸

Actually when Cassian mentions Gwyn's name after they're taken. His shadows darken and It's the first time in the entire series that he stuttered. Which is a reaction for a composed spymaster.

You are right, it's unsinkable. Because it can't sink any deeper.

Lucien thinks more of her than just as a mate. He sees that she likes to garden so he gives her a gift that fits her hobby.

So giving Elain space is now a bad thing? What did you want to throw them both in a house together and lock the door?

Because he's not forcing himself on her like Cassian did to Nesta he must not care? Even though he blushes and sends her longing looks.

Elain calls NC home and then pages later Cassian goes on and on about how Elain looks terrible in black. However later she changes into an amethyst dress which fits her better. Amethyst just so happens to be a Day Court color.

And you can't tell me Sjm doesn't use colors for symbolism, when she most certainly does.

She wanted sex from Az. And Nesta wanted sex from her many males.. There's no romance there, Elain gave her gift back. Which is a form of rejection. Fun fact, she still has Lucien's gifts.

Going to another Court isn't leaving your sisters. It's the equivalent of going to a different city. Especially when they have magical transportation.

I also won't be turning comments off like a little bitch.

Xoxo 😘

[markantonys]

My Mom Reacts To: wheel of time season 2 episodes 5-8 (episodes 1-4) (season 1)

the episode 1-4 post did not contain book spoilers, but this one does, so beware!

first, some dinnertable questions that arose in the past few days:

mom: 3000 years ago, when the first dragon was around, was ishamael--wait. was ishamael the dragon? me: no mom: but he was around back then? me: yes, he was the first dragon's best friend, but then he betrayed him mom: just like how liandrin is betraying everyone

(also, she keeps trying to call him "ishmael" like the moby dick character)

mom: at the end of 14 books, does good triumph over evil? me: i'm not gonna tell you that mom: well this show won't go for 14 seasons, or if it does, i'll be in a dementia ward by then

mom: how long is someone the amyrlin? me: for life, unless they get removed mom: is it an elected position or would they have like a coup? me: [sweating] it's an elected position

she wanted to know where everything was, so i pulled out the handy randland map mug she gave me for christmas to show her! haha

she also asked if we see more of the other colors (ajahs) in the books, and i said if anything we see less because liandrin and alanna have much less screentime in the books, and she was very surprised to hear that

dad: [setting up a dad joke voice] what's it called when lan dies? me: what? dad: lan's end

(okay that might be an americans-only joke lmao there's a big clothing chain called lands' end, not sure how widespread it is. but it cracked ME up, at least!)

mom: does lan die?!?!?!? me: you read his wikipedia article like 2 months ago mom: well i don't remember any of it, that was a long time ago!

she also assumed that no one who is together now (lanaeve + randgwene) will end up together. i'd straight up told her a while ago that rand and egwene don't end up together but she wasn't totally sure of that now, so i think it's actually okay if i tell her spoilers because she'll forget them immediately djkfjgh

episode 5

"she should be glad to get those ridiculous nails cut"

she was horrified by the horse slaughter!

my dad laughed at the guy getting his head exploded, maybe it's not just rand maybe he just likes to see Anyone have a bad time

elyas: your friends from the two rivers aren't your pack mom: ohhhh 😔😠 elyas: neither was your wife mom: [GASP]

she loves hopper so much and i'm not ready for her to see ep8!!

brown sister trio introduced, we pause as i am tasked with writing down every ajah and what they do lmao

my mom repeatedly asked if suroth was a forsaken. probably because she has The Audacity to talk to an actual forsaken Like That!

not much reaction to aviendha at all this episode! i think my mom was a bit overwhelmed by all the new info being learned in this episode, so she was more concerned with trying to figure out who the aiel and the seanchan are than with paying attention to aviendha specifically (partially my fault bc i first explained the aiel as "those warrior people" and she thought i meant the seanchan lmao). she mourned that we hadn't started our character/terminology list on a bigger piece of paper!

i had to fight to keep it together rather than shout with joy during the gawyn namedrop djkjfgh

mom: did the red one free nynaeve so they could try to escape?? me: yes mom: she is just too complicated for me

in this same vein, my dad later referred to liandrin as a "double double agent"

moiraine: [big sigh] dad: she's always a drama queen

he's not wrong jkdjfg

ishy tenderly stroking rand's face also got no reaction, much to my surprise haha i meanwhile was silently losing it

when the seanchan were bringing out egwene and saying how powerful she is, my dad was like "but she's the wrong one, it's the other one who's powerful" oh my god let poor egwene LIVE djkfg even he is pulling a "did you hear that nynaeve is the most powerful channeler we've seen in 1000 years" on her!

my mom cracked up at moiraine saying "it's your choice rand, i mean it this time" and was like "yeah i was gonna say, is she ACTUALLY going to let him choose here?"

episode 6

my mom literally THE SECOND renna's bracelet linked with the a'dam: "so she can channel too? i thought these people punished everyone who can channel" not her INSTANTLY clocking The Sul'dam Secret when in-world it apparently took hundreds of years for anyone to notice hahaha this certainly lends weight to the "this information Is Known but routinely suppressed, as fascist governments are wont to do" interpretation over the "literally not a single person had any idea until the wondergirls" interpretation

lanfear: why do you think you can't trust me? mom: because you have a silly hat

911 lanfear's just been murdered. i guess some people (straight women) ARE immune to her dominatrix outfit djkfg

my mom also voiced her displeasure with rand's haircut again in this scene. my mom 🤝 me 🤝 mat

BOTH my parents thought lanfear's condition was going to be that rand had to kill moiraine himself! the second he opened his eyes they both said it! they're already thinking so dark!

on that note, i'd predicted my mom would be annoyed at moiraine for refusing barthanes's sandwiches, but that was not the case: instead, she and my dad both went "oh i bet the sandwiches are poisoned" they're so suspicious of everything now! and rightfully so

"i can hear you bickering from the fruit market" got a good laugh

my mom also gave a hearty, appreciative chuckle at mat shitting on rand's hair. he spoke for all of us!

mat: i'll meet you in an hour mom: they don't have watches, how will they know when it's been an hour?

mom when moiraine apologizes to barthanes: why is she being nice? me: because she feels bad mom, as if it never occurred to her moiraine might have a conscience: oh..............

mom when siuan arrives in cairhien: now someone can tell her about liandrin! me: but no one here knows that mom: UGH!!!

haha welcome to wheel of time! the necessary information is always stuck in the wrong plotlines and unable to be passed along to the relevant people!

elayne to nynaeve: if we help ryma, we can't help egwene mom: oh this poor woman, now she's faced with another hard choice just like in the arches! me: [sits there stunned because i never made that connection]

episode 7

my mom loved lan telling rand to tuck in his shirt, naturally

lan: heron dips over the wing [or whatever the name was] mom: what? me: it's a sword form, they all have weird names mom: oh, that would explain why it didn't make any sense

lan: your duty is to protect everyone in the world, not just the ones you love mom: that's a big responsibility :(

she laughed and said "she doesn't like not being the boss!" at nynaeve's face when elayne told her to do what she said

she is SO PRESSED about other characters needing to find out about liandrin. she was so excited when anvaere eavesdropped and then so mad when moiraine left before anvaere could tell her the news (but i reassured her by saying that moiraine is about to go to the same place as nynaeve & co who will be able to tell her)

moiraine: [is Mean to lan] mom: TUH! dad: he should just slay her

mom: so what does this tea do? me: allegedly it will show mat his past lives mom: but it might be a trick me: ishamael DOES call himself "father of lies"

my dad was like "that was cool!" after mat's bad trip, which is among his biggest reactions to anything, other than "[chuckles] that was a good one!" when egwene said "renna i will kill you"

ishy: i just want to close my eyes and never have to open them again mom: so kill yourself then 🙄

911 ishamael's also been found murdered. i think she could put the forsaken in line honestly, "you have a silly hat" "kill yourself" she's just not having any of their shit. i hate to compare her to cadsuane, but it's kinda giving cadsuane.

lanfear's dominatrix outfit did get more appreciation this time though when the silly hat was not present ("they had fun with her costumes")

rand: i need your help lanfear mom: ??????? doesn't he know she's evil???????

"she could at least say something nice to lan 🙄" when moiraine fails to say something nice to lan after getting unshielded thanks to him

lanfear: [broken amyrlin line] mom: is she broken??? me: i think she just meant metaphorically, not physically mom: oh. but their love is broken :(

episode 8

my dad actually put his laptop away to watch this episode with his full attention. this is high praise! he never does that!

mom: who's that? [dain] me: the whitecloak perrin spared when he escaped with aviendha mom: i don't remember that me: we watched that YESTERDAY mom: 🤷

she did remember after another moment though haha but that supports my impression that ep5 was A Bit Too Much New Info for her to take in all at once

lanfear: rand i'm the only one who truly cares about you mom: i don't think THAT'S true!

when perrin tells hopper to stay there: "he's just going to leave his dog out in the desert with no water???"

mom when lanfear calls ishy sweetheart and strokes his hair: wait was he the one she was in love with????? me: no it was rand's past life, that's why she's obsessed with rand mom: rand's past WIFE???? me: LIFE

babe wake up new polycule just dropped (lanfear/ishy/lews/ilyena)

she GASPED when renna cut off egwene's braid! as she should!

she said "too bad min isn't here" during the episode (she thought it would be helpful if min could tell mat what would happen if he were to touch the dagger; i was like "i think he knows it would be bad mom" lmao) and after the episode she anxiously asked if we would ever see min again, dammit mom don't you dare become a min stan on me jdkfgh (although, the fact that she thought we might not see her again indicates it's 0% on her radar that min might be anyone's love interest, which is interesting! a number of show-onlys were at least expecting her to be mat's i think)

nynaeve: i'll make you regret the first kiss your mother ever gave your father mom: [delighted] that's a creative one! dad: there are a lot of nasty women on this show and only one nasty man [ishy] me and mom: TUH!

although he is not wrong to say that s2 was the season of Female Villains and Women Being Mean (and i loved every moment of it!). don't you worry dad, rand's gonna be stepping up to fill the Nasty Man Quota soon enough. and i can't wait!

dad when rand is watching egwene from a distance: he's not doing a good job of hiding me: at least his cloak is the same color as the wall dad: well his dumb face isn't

why is he SUCH a hater when it comes to poor rand jkdjfg please, that's your future son-in-law!

they both were repeatedly pressed about everyone carrying the horn box (or rather "the briefcase" as my dad called it) out in the open

mom: they need to just put it in a sack! me: they don't have any sacks on hand! mom: there's plenty of sacks lying around!!!

she keeps thinking that rand got the heron-marked sword from his mom, and when she saw that turak had one she was like "but i thought those were the swords of the aiel?" and i cracked up imagining how offended aiel would be to hear her say that

she missed rand killing all the seanchan because she was too busy asking me the above question, but when she looked back at the screen she went 1) "oh, this is so gory" 2) "did RAND do all that????"

she was sad about ingtar, she was like "ohhhh, i liked him :(" imagine caring about ingtar, could not be me jdkfg

me: so lanfear is talking about the seals of the other forsaken, she wants this guy to throw them all in the ocean because she doesn't want them to be released mom: why doesn't she just do it herself? me: me: me: i don't know, actually..................

(maybe she just wanted them gone stat but didn't want to leave falme for even a moment while shit was going down with rand and ishy? or maybe she was like, I'm Too Hot And Iconic To Get My Hands Dirty Doing Things Myself)

mom as soon as renna's shown to be alive, after egwene's picked up the collar: she should go put the collar on her!

she been knew again!

mom at the mat-perrin reunion: put the spear down before you hug him, you'll stab someone by accident!!!!

she was glad to see egwene get her vengeance, but added "but now i bet she'll feel guilty for killing someone because she's a good person :("

ishy: [talking about what rand did in his past life] mom: rand doesn't even remember that! rand right on cue: i'm not lews therin!

i warned her "you might not want to look" just before hopper's death, but she did look, and she was very sad. as was i!

she thought that one of the heroes of the horn was stepin and i told her it wasn't (it was just some random guy with similar hair) but maybe i should've let her keep on believing it because it's a nice idea!

mom when the spear goes through ishy and hits rand: OH NO!!!! just like min said!!! me: [vibrating with glee over The Great Cauthor Stabbening]

when ishy said "i'm sorry old friend" to rand here my dad said "that sounds familiar" and i was like what's he talking about? but then realized that's what LTT said to ishy in the cold open!!! my heart!!! thank you dad for catching that parallel, i gotta go make a gifset now

"how is one guy holding off all these soldiers by himself?" mom i cannot believe you of all people would doubt lan!

she laughed at rand being like "[half-dead] who are you???" but made no comment on the subsequent romantic shot of elayne. however, after the episode she was like "'who are you?' rand said................is something going to happen with him and elayne??" and i was like 🤷😁😁😁😁 and then she said "but they both have red hair, are they from the same place?" and i told her that elayne is not aiel and not ALL redheads are aiel lmao and maybe i should've just said "you'll see" but. i don't think it's a spoiler to confirm that elayne is not aiel.

she does not believe that ishy is really dead, and she kept asking me if he was really dead and if he shows up again later in the books and i swear, the three oaths possessed me in that moment and made me incapable of saying "yes he's really dead, no we don't see him again in the books". so i just kept shrugging which probably made it obvious that indeed, this is not the last we see of him haha

mom when moiraine starts weaving fire in the direction of the tower: what's she doing?! everyone's up on that tower!!! me: she's not trying to BLOW UP RAND mom: oh

at some point during all the battles she was like "now what's lanfear up to during all this? 🤨" a good thought to have always!

at the end of the episode: "now we have to wait a whole year or two for the next season!!!!!" she's hooked!!

favorite character roundup: my mom said lan is #1 and egwene is #2, and she also loves loial, and she said that she didn't care for perrin last season but likes him a lot now. my dad said his favorites are "the tree guy" (loial) and "the new woman at the end who's more powerful than anyone we've seen so far" (moghedien! that one was a surprise to me. tumblr 🤝 my dad. i hope he'll enjoy The Season Of Moghedien next season! tho it could also be that he just said her because she was the last character we saw and he'd already forgotten all the other ones lmao)

[warriorcatsofficialfacts]

Can you share more about the ableism in warrior cats? I always hear it talked about but I haven't read it since I was a kid so I don't remember.

this is a complicated thing to discuss bc on some level the ableism in warrior cats has its roots in the sheer amount of value this cat society places on physical strength but here are the like. basic bullet points i guess

1. use of ableist slurs

the terms "cripple" and "lame" are used in the books, both of which are insults to the physically disabled, cripple being considered an active slur most physically disabled people agree ablebodied people shouldn't even say. i Have had one person defend this by pointing out that the characters who use the term cripple are using it As a slur: it's meant to be a depiction of jayfeather as a protagonist experiencing ableism

i countered this with pointing out that mentally disabled people do not have to worry about opening up a warrior cats book and having to read the pov character be called the r slur, nor do gay people have to worry about opening up a warrior cats book and having to see the pov be called a faggot or a queer. The issue is not the use of ableist slur itself, but instead the fact that it is the Only instance of a character being called an irl slur or curse word. i should not have to explain why it's not appropriate for books to contain slurs when they're not even allowed to say Fuck. if these were books where real life bigotry and bigoted terminology were used frequently and not only for physical disabilities, i would see no issue with jaypaw being called a cripple by two ableist jackasses

however even with that out of the way there's still the fact that disabled characters are referred to as Lame more than once, not by an ableist character, but by the Narration. that's not a character being a bigot, that's the Books being bigoted

2. disability as a plot device to serve abled characters

the most obvious instance of this is snowkit (who i often call a "walking hate crime" for this exact reason), but it's fairly consistent that disabled characters almost never solely exist for their own sake, but always to say something about the abled people around them or have an impact on those people

snowkit dies to traumatize his mother, his deafness being directly related to his death. jagged peak is made a paraplegic to demonstrate clear sky's cruelty to even his own family. briarlights paralysis is routinely shown through the lens of other people debating or discussing her worth and impact on her. cinderpelt loses movement in her leg both to emotionally impact fireheart and to be yet another person who's life has been impacted by tigerclaw. brightheart is permanently disfigured so that bluestars cruelty towards her can act as yet another step in her progression to madness, and so that firestars renaming of her can establish him as a more benevolent leader (sort of patching up his predecessors wrongdoings).

there are a few exceptions, crookedstar in particular is pretty good.

3. arc one exclusive: disability or disfigurement as a sign of menace

i generally say arc one is the best on ableism simply because it treats disability as a Fact that Will inevitably happen to all warriors (this is why basically Every elder is disabled). but there is one thing that. I think people forget? A Little?

Outside of elders, there are a decent number of arc one cats who are described as being disfigured or disabled outside of thunderclan

if i'm remembering correctly, these are crookedstar, brokenstar, deadfoot, and clawface. only two of these cats (crooked and dead) are intended to actually be Disabled (even though brokenstar has a SCI if you know how cat spines work), but all of them are meant to be visually disfigured, with brokenstar having an obviously deformed tail, and clawface having distinctive facial scarring

it's probably pretty easy to figure out why i'm bringing up broken and claw, since. they're both murderers. but here's something that's easy to miss:

crookedstar is rather consistently antagonistic in arc one and deadfoot is explicitly considered to be intimidating by fireheart. deadfoot is the least egregious, he is a deputy afterall so it makes sense fireheart is menaced by his presence, but crookedstar is very much like. he openly declares he intends to take over windclans old territory along with shadowclan. people tend to forget but riverclan is Mean in arc one, Crookedstar Included.

that's 4/4 of the non elderly disfigured characters in arc one who are meant to be somehow intimidating at best, and menacing, antagonistic, and evil at worst. not great numbers. btw the reason i'm not counting cinder and bright here is because those are previously abled characters who then Become disfigured and disabled, meanwhile these four are introduced as disfigured and/or disabled, which is a bit different from a meta perspective.

4. outside of arc one, a universal perspective that disabled characters cannot be warriors

now, this isn't really a Thing in arc one. there's only One character who is explicitly made to stop being a warrior because she's disabled, and even then it's not that she Couldn't be a warrior: her broken bone healed wrong and warrior duties would be constantly painful for her.

however after arc one there are very few New disabled characters at all, and all of them are medicine cats or elders. longtail is blinded and almost immediately retires (even though that doesn't seem super in character for him), jayfeather tries his best to be a warrior despite the complete and total uselessness of everyone around him but is eventually forced into medicine cat duties by god anyway, briarlight is genuinely just a medicine cat in all but name, and if you count shadowsight (which. honestly i don't think you should) he's also a medicine cat

i just. feel the need to point out that arc one specifically had brightheart get taught how to be a warrior by her abled boyfriend but somehow none of these cats could accommodate Themselves. I guess accommodations only exist if you're Half blind or have an abled boyfriend to save you from your own body