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chasing a ghost
exactly what you run from, you end up chasing. (angst -> happy ending)
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tw- mentions internalised homophobia. it's not intense, but the story is based around it. it has a happy ending though, of course!
Everyone always says your first love sticks with you throughout your whole life. And for you, those words were a haunting truth you could never shake.
No matter how far you went, no matter how many years passed. It still rung true. Your worst fear was that it always would.
The last ten years of your life had been all over the place– literally. After the breakup, you took a gap year, because the pain after it was that intense you felt you had no other option. So, you decided to travel the world with nothing but the bag on your back, looking for an answer to your life that made such a pain worth it– not knowing the thing you were chasing was the exact thing you were running from.
You started in Spain, in Barce- in the city where you fell in love. Though, you haven't returned since you left.
University was fun, you enjoyed it more than you thought you would. Even more so when you met the love of y- your first love. She was shy, at first. But you caught glimpses of her when she was with her friends in the study hall, when she’d come out of her shell and say something that would have them all laughing until they were shushed. When she would smile so brightly you swore the lights dimmed and a spotlight shone on her, or when she’d always wait behind for the last person in the group to tidy their stuff as the others raced off to wherever they were going next.
You studied her from afar for weeks, spending more time doing that than studying your actual course, but it paid off when you accidentally, not-so-accidentally, bumped into her one time as she rushed from one lecture hall to the other, and the… football under her arm went tumbling down the hallway.
A football? You remembered thinking then. Why would someone bring a football to their lecture?
“A football?” You scrunched your nose as you turned to watch the neon orange thing roll out of sight.
“Oh, s-sí. I know it is weird.” She chuckled nervously, her hand rubbing the back of her neck as her eyes darted all over your face, the football the last thing on her mind. “I have training after my next lecture. For football.”
“Well, I think you’re going to be late to your next lecture if you want to get your ball back.” You told her in amusement, hearing the commotion of a group of boys jeering over the sight of such a miraculous object appearing in front of them.
Alexia’s eyes went wide, jumping off her train of thought and back down onto solid ground, where the aforementioned group of people, that resembled entertained cavemen watching a fire or gorillas cheering at their next meal, still had her beloved ball.
“No! I need that back!” She ran ahead, before halting a moment later when she heard your laugh behind her. So she turned back around, jogged over to you, stumbling over the cartoon love hearts swirling around her mind as she tried to find the words to say, then giggled sheepishly at herself. “Sorry for running into you. I will hopefully see you around.”
“See you around.” You replied, though she was already chasing after her prized possession before you got a chance to say it. The feeling you got after hearing her say ‘hopefully’ was a little embarrassing, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t love it.
And fortunately for you, you did see her around, quite often actually to the point where you weren’t sure if it was actually a coincidence or not. At one point, it was like the two of you unknowingly formed a routine; you would finish your first lecture at 11:30am, walk as fast as you could over to the other building where your 12pm lecture was and wait for her to arrive for her 11:45 lecture. She would arrive five minutes before she had to go in, and you’d spend that time talking together, laughing, teasing, checking in with each other, until she had to leave. Even still, she would wait until the last second before she’d be classed as late to go in, just so she could talk to you.
Then, it progressed to meeting her for study sessions together in the library. One day, your friends on your course were somehow all off sick, and her friends were apparently not important to her when she knew you would be alone. So, without too much of a fuss, she quietly and nervously invited you to study with her, where you both spent the whole time trying to study but were actually just too excited about being together one-on-one with nobody else around to get anything done. No chaos of the corridor, no boys trying to take her football, no friends to tease you. The whole time, however, that damn football was there with you, positioned at her feet under the table as she messed with it throughout the duration of the session.
It was there that you realised studying and education wasn’t her best skill; she was smart, very smart, her mind just seemed a million miles away everytime. All too often you’d have to tell her to concentrate when she had spent too long looking out the window at the football pitch, or you’d quietly scold her for trying to do kick-ups in the library or whenever she tried to nutmeg you when you just wanted to get through the week’s reading assignment. She never cared for grades or essays or quizzes, all she wanted was to play football.
That meant it wasn’t such a surprise to you when, on a random day after the Christmas break, she rushed in to meet you at your infamous spot outside what should have been her 11:45 lecture and, when you told her off for how she was about to be late, she smiled a smug grin and shrugged you off. Then she told you she had dropped out of University like it was nothing, before spinning you around and demanding she walked you to your lecture. She didn’t give you time to scold her like you often did, because she tugged you out of the way of people in the corridor outside the door to your lecture and kissed you, for the first time, out of nowhere, only for her to pull away and kiss your cheek in goodbye as she gently ushered you towards the door.
You had to thank whatever god was up there that that particular lecture wasn’t too important because you don’t remember a thing about it. All you could think about throughout was the way she had pulled you in, wrapped her arms around your waist, and leaned down to kiss you with such tenderness yet such confidence that you weren’t sure you could ever be the same person again afterwards. For something so small, you felt it changed you, and though it might have been just a kiss, it opened a door for you to a version of yourself you didn’t know existed.
After that day, you walked around with your head held high, sometimes uncertain if you were walking or skipping since you felt that much joy. You couldn’t view the world around you as ordinary anymore, everything around you seemed more vivid, the smaller things felt more significant and the bigger things less important. That kiss was a spark that ignited something… profound; changing not just your relationship with her, but who you were as a person.
You were on cloud nine with her, the kind of happiness that felt never-ending and all-consuming. That reassured you, especially in moments where you two bickered or felt a little distant as she travelled for football. You were almost certain it’d go on forever.
Every glance, every touch, every word between you, they were all things you cherished. The relationship was something sacred, just for the two of you, and you could have sworn it made your heart soar far from your chest. More often than not, you felt invincible in her company. For the first time in your life, love wasn’t a distant daydream or a wish for the future, it was something real, something that was undeniably yours that no one could take from you. No one but yourself.
Your relationship with her grew and grew, until a year of stolen kisses in the private of your rooms, a year of pinkies linked under dinner tables whilst out with your friends, a year of being just friends to everyone else but the loves of your lives to each other, a year of complete and unconditional love passed without you realising.
“Ale, where the hell are you taking me?” You giggled, two cold hands covering your eyes as you were led somewhere by your silent girlfriend. Not that you could see, there was a huge grin on her face as she guided you to a place she had been desperate to take you ever since she met you.
“You will find out. Two more seconds, then you see.” It was all going smoothly until she led you a bit too far and you walked head first into… a gate? “Oops, lo siento, mi amor. I did not mean to, I couldn’t see how close we were, your head was in my way.”
“My head was in your way? You i- you’re the one covering my eyes! Pendeja.” You muttered, but then she lifted her hands off your face and you were met with… a football pitch. “Are you kidding me?”
“Happy one year anniversary.” Alexia smiled brightly, not at all phased by the unimpressed look on your face. “You are going to play football with me.”
“Am I really.” You scoffed, taking in the sight of the miserably grey sky and the aftermath of the morning’s rain in the form of a repulsively muddy field.
“You will. What’s that saying? Something… something about, ah, el sentido del humor?” She mumbled, waving one of her hands in the air like the wind would blow the words to her mind as she opened the gate with the other.
“You want me to humour you?” You turned back to her, desperately suppressing a smile at the way her eyes widened and she clapped her hands when you gave her the right turn of phrase.
“Eso mismo! It will be fun, come on.”
“It’s not even our one year yet, you’re early.” You crossed your arms over your chest in one last show of defiance, when as a matter of fact, you were convinced the minute you saw the excitement on her face.
“I know but it is a year since I kissed you and that’s what started everything.” The brunette girl shrugged, tucking her hands in the pockets of her joggers.
“I think what started everything was me bumping into you when you were running.” Her jaw dropped in a very comedic way then.
“So you did do it on purpose! I knew it!” She exclaimed, walking closer and jabbing an accusing finger into your chest. You stepped backwards and laughed as she shuffled yet closer, moving into your space and pulling you into her for a hug. It was only brief and when she leaned back, her arms still around you, she shook her head in disbelief at your past antics, before softening. “Well, I did think about that date too, but I had a game that day and you had an important presentation so… I decided to do it today.”
You smiled in spite of yourself and left a kiss on her chin.
“And you thought bringing me to play football on a muddy field in the middle of winter was a good idea?” She smirked and nodded, clearly confident in her abilities to convince you.
“I have always wanted you to play it with me but you always say no. But I think, since I was the one that kissed you in the beginning, you should do this for me.” You rolled your eyes and she grinned at you as you did so, her thumbs drawing circles where they’d slipped under your jumper on your hips. “I bought you boots and everything! Also a shirt with your name on it but my number, but it is too cold for that so I left it at home. And, if you do this with me, we can have a shower together after and I wash your hair and give you a massage.”
“I was going to agree anyway but sure, I’ll take that deal.” You told her a moment later after some faux consideration, to which she clicked her tongue in response and lifted you up over her shoulder. “Oh, well, what a lovely view I have here of your- ow!”
But the magic wore off, and the whispers started.
Not from anyone else, from yourself. At first, you ignored them, turning your nose up at them and shrugging them off, thinking they were stupid because of how right it felt to be in her arms. But they were insistent, determined to make an imprint on you and the love you wanted to give. Eventually they did. And the secrecy of your relationship began to feel like a double-edged sword that cut deeper with every passing day. You needed help, needed someone to stop the barrage of insecurities that you never wanted to face, never imagined you’d have to. But it felt like a life and death matter, keeping it a secret. You believed you had no other choice. And voicing these anxieties to her, the very subject of the situation, wasn’t even an option in your mind.
You told yourself it was safer to keep it a secret, to make sure your love was safe from the cruelty of the world and its society, yet with each lie you told and each delusion you convinced yourself of, a piece of your identity was chipped away. She had a front-row seat to every part of you that slipped out of her grasp.
At some point, you even stopped recognising the person you saw in the mirror. What was once a reflection of somebody in love, brimming with hope and excitement for not only the future but for every moment you spent in the present with your girlfriend, soon turned into someone cautious, afraid, who constantly looked over their shoulder. The fear consumed you until it was hard to breathe. And in turn, you found yourself pulling away from others because you couldn’t bear lying to them any longer, whilst also not possessing the strength to tell them the truth.
If anyone asked that past version of you why you did it, you’d tell them it was to protect both her and yourself. In reality, you knew that was such a pathetic lie. It couldn't even be called an excuse.
Something that once brought you more fulfillment and happiness than anything else in your life soon felt like a cinder brick chained to your leg, like stones and gravel in your pockets, dragging you down until you were drowning from the expectations you thought were put on you by the world, when they really just your own.
Alexi- she grew antsy and uneasy. You begged to keep it under wraps for just a few more weeks.
She wanted to tell people; she might have been shy at first glance, but she was the kind of person whose love demanded to be seen, she didn’t survive by keeping it contained to the shadows. Every time she looked at you, her feelings for you were written all over her face – the joy, the pride, the desperation to share her love for you with everyone that mattered. To her, you were something worth sharing with the world. She dreamed of the day she could introduce who you really were to her with her family, her friends, with anyone that would listen.
Initially, she understood why you were hesitant. Like you’d always told her, she was smart. She knew why you were reluctant to tell people, she just had no idea how deep that ‘reluctance’ ran. One of your favourite traits of hers ended up being the beginning of the end; she was exceptionally good at reading people and figuring out what was happening before it had even happened. She saw the way you shrank into yourself when people looked your way, how you would purposely lower your voice when talking about the pair of you. She tried to be patient, but it wasn’t easy.
Each time she caught herself smiling at you in public, the same smile that made you blush because you could see and feel her love for you, she knew she had to suppress it for your sake. That caused an ache to grow in her chest, the fact she had to dim her own light to quell your worries. Because it wasn’t just the secrecy that hurt, it was the feeling that she wasn’t allowed to love you as wholeheartedly as she wanted to.
Weeks turned into months and she tried to give you your space to work it through, but soon enough she felt like she was in a relationship with a ghost. A shell of a person. And in all honesty, to her, it felt like rejection, even though she knew that wasn’t your intention. However, her assurance in that began to falter. She began to wonder if her love wasn’t enough, if she wasn’t enough. She prided herself on being someone that was confident and sure, but the longer she spent feeling like a bird in a cage, she found herself questioning everything.
Why couldn’t you see what she saw? That your love was worth the risk?
There were more nights than she could count where she spent hours laying awake, the darkness doing little to calm her racing mind. Most of the time, you were sleeping beside her, either cuddled to her side or facing away from her. The times you chose to snuggle up to her were the worst nights, where she didn’t get an ounce of sleep as it was like she could almost feel the fear radiating off of you. It reached a point where she felt trapped between wanting to honour your insecurities and needing to honour her own heart. The longer you rejected the idea of telling people, the more she felt like a secret, something to be hidden rather than openly cherished.
Though she never wanted to make you feel guilty, there was a loneliness that settled inside of her, and there was a growing distance she felt from you that she had no idea how to bridge without it inevitably ending in one thing.
She never stopped loving you for a second, how could she? But the weight of carrying that love alone eventually became unbearable. As much as she tried to resist that, it was there anyway. It soon led to her feeling like she was losing the person she wanted to be, someone that wanted their love to be visible, that wanted to celebrate it with the people she valued most in her life. So she made a choice.
After that, you couldn’t stay in Barcelona. You couldn't stomach the place any longer when every street corner and every park and every restaurant solely served as a reminder of the good memories that were a thing of the past. Even saying the name of the city sent your head and your heart to a dark place. So did saying her name.
Back then, you couldn’t figure out who you were; torn between the person you wanted to be and the person you thought you had to be. So you went travelling, to immerse yourself in any and all cultures, to meet new people, to try new things, in the hopes of finding yourself again.
Except, every single word that was exchanged in that final conversation still echoed in your mind no matter where you went.
You sat in cafes halfway across the world and saw her in the steam from your coffee that just so happened to be the same one she used to have every morning. You flew over countless countries and saw her in every stadium you passed by. You saw her in every blade of grass, in every speck of sand, in every sunrise and sunset, before you had to remind yourself that she wasn’t yours to think about anymore.
It had been years, almost a decade, since your first kiss with her, and you could still vividly remember how it played out, how the warmth and the softness of her lips caught you off guard, how she smirked at you after kissing your cheek in goodbye before sending you into your lecture. That spontaneous moment – well, spontaneous for you, for her it had been precariously planned – was some kind of cruel foreshadow that haunted you; it had happened in public, the pair of you could have been open from the very start, the irony of it had never been lost on you. Perhaps the warning signs might have been there from the start.
“Our first kiss was in public, it was in front of so many people, but now I can’t even smile at you too much when we’re out together.”
“Don’t say that. You’re the one that initiated our first kiss in public, I didn’t.”
“So, what, you would change how it happened?”
“M… maybe, yeah.”
You knew, as soon as you said that last thing, the relationship was over. To this day you still don’t know why you said it, you wouldn’t change a thing about the relationship or her as a person. It was just another example of you being too terrified to be honest with who you were.
By the time you accepted that it was okay to be who you were, there was only one person you wanted. But by then, that ship had long sailed. You didn’t want anyone, you wanted her. Forcing yourself to believe otherwise felt like carving out a part of your heart. It was almost as hard as having to hear her break up with you over a fear you didn’t even know you had until she ran into your life. As a result, she was long gone, and you didn’t even blame her.
Eventually, you managed to persuade yourself you didn’t want her. It was better that way. And though you weren’t quite whole, you did find yourself through travelling. It just… you still felt like something was missing.
—
Dropping out of University wasn’t ideal, but like most other people that did the same thing, you saw too much beauty in the world on your gap year to be restrained to a 9-5 for the rest of your life. You were fortunate enough to find a company that allowed you to pick up odd jobs here and there of your choosing, in any country of your choosing. It was a dream, you felt free when you weren't ruminating on the events that led you to this point.
Each city you visited became a second home for however long you spent there, though every fleeting connection you made with their locals was a futile attempt to paint over the memories from your past. Nothing could fill the void left behind, but still, you jumped from country to country, telling yourself that planes and hotels and hole-in-the-wall bars were the places you were supposed to be.
Finding yourself walking home from the closest corner shop to your hotel at the dead of night past one of Sydney’s most well-known clubs, only to stumble across her standing outside its entrance, was the most suffocated and trapped you had felt since the days after you saw her last– nine years ago.
You stopped in your tracks some distance away from her, your eyes locking with hers as she froze, body going rigid at the sight of you. Nothing could have prepared you to see her that night, you really weren’t ready to see her again at all especially with zero warning. Sure, you dreamt of seeing her again, of being back in each other’s lives like no time had passed at all, but actually seeing her was a whole different story.
You didn’t know what to do.
“I never thought I would see you again.” Alexia, with pink hair and an unnecessarily large gold medal around her neck, stated first. “Qué coño haces aquí?”
The viciousness of her voice caught you off-guard, because throughout your whole relationship including the ending argument, she had never once sounded like that. Though, nine years had passed, maybe she had changed. For the worst.
So, you walked right past her, not in the mood to entertain a fight with an ex.
“I was talking to you.” She called after you, sounding somewhat shocked you had the audacity to walk past her like she was nothing more than a stranger. But, in this state, she was. It seemed the years had hardened her into someone that was just a stranger.
“Maybe I don’t want to talk to you.” You fired back as you continued to walk, and you thought that was that. But then you heard the breaking of glass as Alexia dropped her bottle of beer into the nearest bin and followed you.
“You know, it is the least I deserve after how you treated me back then.” She knew exactly the right thing to say to get you to react.
“If you had half a brain and any sense of sympathy, you would know I didn’t do any of it to hurt you.” You fought back, turning to face her and wanting nothing more than to slap the triumphant smirk off of her face.
“Now that is a lie. How would that make it okay? That the person I love didn’t love me enough to let me tell my family at least?”
Almost a decade’s worth of anger was being unleashed on you and there was nothing you could do to stop it. You knew you deserved it, but were too riled up in the moment to sit there and take it. So you retaliated, because the woman in front of you was being selfish and too big-headed to see why you did it, and if she still didn’t understand after nine years, it was her own fault.
“Of course I loved you enough, I loved you more than I could ever say. Have you, on the off chance, ever heard of something called anxiety? Ever heard of a thing called fear, and depression, or even just mental health overall?”
When Alexia won her first Champion’s League, you purposely went out of your way to ignore the news, because it seemed after that title her name was never out of it. So, even though her face was all over the newspapers during the summer you spent in London, detailing the severity of her injury and what that meant for Spain’s chances, you didn’t know a thing about it.
You matched her immaturity, completely unaware of the fact she had just spent the best part of a year out of playing action, during which she had so desperately wished she had you by her side to help her through one of the worst moments of her life. In the first couple months, she had been forced to see a therapist, she had been diagnosed with depression, and what she learnt in those sessions was that all the mental pain she felt then came circling right back to you.
Alexia had thrown herself into football after breaking up with you, seeking refuge in the one thing that had never let her down all her life. But then she tore her ACL, and it had let her down, and suddenly the emptiness of her bed and her chest was the only thing on her mind. There were days where she never left the house, where she didn’t do her stretches, didn’t get up from the sofa to keep her leg moving. There were days where all she thought about was you, and how different things might have been if the two of you weren’t so young back then.
Maybe if she was more patient, you two would have made it, and her gruelling rehab wouldn’t have been so challenging. But she was on her own, she had no one to wake up for in the morning, no shoulder to cry on, no one to reassure her in the middle of the night when she couldn’t sleep that she’d get through this. She just had to get on with it.
So to see you stood in front of her only mere months after she'd made her return, despite winning the biggest title of her career, it was like she’d finally woken up from the numb headspace she’d been in since the pop in her knee the summer before. Only, the words that came out of her mouth weren’t her true feelings. She had no idea where they were coming from, but they were out before she could stop them. And then it was too late to go back on her words, because by the time she regretted them, you hit back with accusations that stoked the fire that had been extinguished by her progress in therapy. She reverted back to how she felt before her injury, when she still loathed you with every fibre of being, and let out every ounce of pain and fury she had carried with her for years.
However, after you said that, the Barcelona captain came up empty for a reply.
“Times have changed. Things were different then.” You continued on, and it was obvious that too long had passed in the way you couldn't read her face anymore. You completely missed the sorrow and regret on her face, and instead took it for disdain.
“I kno-”
“You don't know a thing.” You laughed maliciously. “You have no idea how I felt or what was going on in my mind. All you did was blame me and run away.”
Just as Alexia had gone to apologise and go back on everything she said, you took things a step further. You were disappointed in yourself for it, but you felt there was no other option but to meet her anger and one-up her, to fight for the last laugh. It was so wrong to address each other in such ways, you both recognised that. Not that it stopped either of you.
“I did not run away, you did. You haven't come home since we broke up and I think that says it all, no?”
“There is no home for me in Barcelona anymore.” Alexia physically recoiled at your statement, and you saw it. You saw the guilt slip away from her eyes and the anger return to them. But it was too late to do anything.
“Well, it looks like it was worth it for the both of us, the breakup. You got to travel and I have the best medal I could get around my neck.”
Your eyes flicked down to the medal and you read the words on it – Women’s World Cup. It was her biggest dream, you remembered countless times she’d be with you, her eyes with that far away look she often got and a dreamy smile on her face as she thought of her future and all she knew she could achieve, as long as the world and the sport allowed her.
“What are you thinking about?” You asked her one night as you wandered into your bedroom to see her lay in bed, hands rested under her head as she stared at the ceiling.
“Football.” She murmured, eyes unmoving, like her entire future was projected on the ceiling in some kind of montage, flickers of trophies and awards passing on by.
“How romantic.” You scoffed, getting into bed beside her and immediately moving to rest your head on her chest with one leg swung across her thighs. “What about football?”
“I am just… excited. There is so much to look forward to.” She whispered in awe, a smile on her face so intense it creased into the corners of her eyes. The sight of it had you smiling too.
“There is.” You sighed contently, before lifting your head up to look at her, and she looked down. “You’ll do such amazing things, Ale. I know you will.”
Somehow, her face softened, and she let out a disbelieving breath as she turned her gaze back to the damn ceiling.
“I hope so.” The midfielder said quietly, as if it was a jinx to speak any louder.
“You will. But you can’t forget me along the way. I want all your medals hung up in our house when we’re older.” Alexia chuckled gently at that, and she leaned down to kiss the top of your head.
“You can have all my medals, you will be right there with me. Me, you, our families. Maybe a family of our own.”
The memory seemed to jump to your minds at the same time, judging by how you met each other’s eyes a moment after you initially looked at the now taunting object that glimmered under the street lamps and city lights around. Her past promise, which had seemed so… eternal and meaningful in that moment, was hardly recognisable. The eyes you stared at weren’t the same either. They were cold and antagonistic, far from the warmth that was once there, the warmth that drew you in in the first place.
It was that revelation that allowed you to continue this animosity.
“Oh yeah? Good for you. I’m sure you and your gold medal will make great kids together.”
“Fuck you. I don’t even know who you are anymore.”
Alexia knew she’d won with that one; she turned around with a shake of her head and headed back to the club whilst you were rooted to the spot, wondering how everything could go so wrong in a matter of minutes.
You don’t know who you are either.
—
That day, in Australia, it wrecked you. Wholly and completely.
It was the nail in the coffin that was your sense of self, because if the one person that never left your thoughts for even a day thought of you like that, then you were lost. Truly lost.
For nine years, whether you knew it or not, you’d been waiting every day to turn a corner and see her standing there. You imagined walking up to her, tears in your eyes and a smile on your face, an expression she reflected when she opened her arms for you to step into. You’d had her hugs for a year, you’d memorised them well, nine years couldn’t erase that and neither could a lifetime. You would always remember the strength she hugged you with and how secure they made you feel in everything. In yourself, in your life, in your love. But to have that same person tell you they don’t recognise you was an unfathomable heartbreak.
No matter where you went in the time after that, the pain never went away. Ever since you realised you’d never be who you was when you were with Alexia, no matter how many places you travelled or how many people you met, how many jobs you did or how many degrees you could get, you wouldn’t feel as settled and happy without her. And, in fact, with time, the ache in your heart only grew. It ached and groaned in your hollow chest as you dragged it around the world when it called for one place and one place only. Or rather, one person.
But said person had made their dislike clear to you. So that option was more unlikely than it’d ever been before.
Not impossible, however.
Because Alexia couldn’t hate herself more for saying so many lies. For being so disgraceful in how she presented herself to someone she still thought so highly of. Most importantly, for making that person think otherwise about her opinion of them.
In the years after she saw you last, when she walked out of your apartment to the sound of your cries behind her, she’d subconsciously searched for you in every person she met. Any habit they had, any slight familiarity in appearance even if it was one freckle in the same place, any similar interests. It was wrong and she knew it was, when she looked back. All the people she hurt, the people who thought they had a chance with her against the idolised version of her first love in her mind, they didn’t deserve her. And after Sydney, she didn’t deserve you either.
When she said those vile things to you, she hoped she would feel some kind of… closure from it. Some kind of catharsis in the fact she could finally close the chapter of her life that had you on her mind all the time. Instead there was just a deep and gnawing disappointment that followed her everywhere she went. From her bed, to training, to her mother’s house – especially her mother’s house, for the wise woman always loved to remind her of what she’d lost – and even to her games as she lined up in the tunnel beforehand.
Her disappointment towards you had dissolved years ago, this disappointment was entirely aimed at herself. She hated how she had let her anger, that she didn’t even feel anymore, overshadow the love that had once defined the both of you. It still did, just in a different and entirely soul-crushing way. The love clung to her heart like a wound that refused to heal, even after all these years.
Ever since she made the hardest decision she had ever had to make, cutting you out of her life, she had spent so much time moving forwards, pushing herself to be stronger, to achieve more, hoping it would erase the memory of you and numb the pain she felt. That failed, however. The only thing she failed at. Seeing you again had broken the dam that stored all her feelings for you and let them flood her mind again. She felt more broken after that confrontation than she had in a long time.
Alexia hadn’t blamed you for some time, and she wasn’t sure why, the second you were in front of her, that she acted like she did. Nobody compared to you and nobody ever would. The fact she made such a horrible comment, one her aggravated self knew would hurt you, did irrevocable things to her view of herself. She never thought she could stoop so low, but she did. She didn’t know how to come back from it.
The version of you she saw that day, the version of you she knew didn’t exist and was only a retaliation to her own hostility, was not the version that stuck in her head the months after that. It was the person she fell in love with when she was only twenty. And it was that version she got when she was getting led out of a bar in Paris, a year after the World Cup, this time with no medal to her name, just a missed penalty.
It was the exact same setup a year onwards, but things were so much different. For starters, you weren’t in Paris for work, you were on a break, and of course the one city in the world you ran to for respite was the same one she was in. However, the sight of two members of security walking out of a bar behind the star you knew Alexia as now was enough concern in itself for you to abandon your friends, who had no idea who the blonde was both as a celebrity and a person of the past to you. Your nerves were fried and you were reluctant to speak to her again, but as soon as you got within two feet of her, you grimaced at how the smell of alcohol radiated off her and knew instantly it was the right thing to do.
“I’ll take her, sorry for… whatever she’s done.” You said to the workers, who rolled their eyes and left you with the drunken mess she was.
“No, you don’t have to take me. You d-don’t deserve to. N-not me.”
Her words were slurred and there was an overwhelming amount of emotion in her voice. The state of her combined with those two things was enough to convince you this time around with her would be different. Different in what way, you weren’t sure. But she could hardly walk on her own, you couldn’t leave anyone in this way, nevermind someone like her who… still meant so much to you.
“Come on, I’ll take you back to where you’re staying, make sure you get there safe.” You had to be sensible then, and focusing on the softness of her skin when you lifted her arm up around your shoulders and held onto her hand was not sensible. “Do you know your hotel?”
She rattled off some more drunk nonsense until you managed to pick out the name of a hotel in her words as you wrapped your arm around her waist to steady her. Fortunately, it wasn’t too far from where you were. And despite her current state, she was unnervingly silent on the walk there. It wasn’t until you made it to the hotel lobby you chanced a look at her and saw a steady stream of tears down her face.
When you saw her like that then, it didn’t matter how many years had passed. It upset you to see her cry then as much as it did when you used to be the one she went to in these cases. Yet, in this scenario, you weren’t that person and you didn’t know how to deal with that.
“Hey, do you have your card on you, Ale?” The nickname slipped out of you, and it was a bad move, judging by the cries that came out of her afterwards. “Okay, alright.”
Since you couldn’t get much out of her, you dragged her over to the reception desk, and it took little convincing for them to hand over a spare keycard considering the sobbing mess that Alexia was.
The whole walk to the elevator, you felt helpless as her shoulders shook, torn between wanting to say something and thinking it was best to stay quiet for the time being since you knew you were probably part of the reason she was like she was. The ride up to her floor was even worse; all you could do was stand there, arm around her and hand in hand, listening to the pain pouring out of her. It sent you spiralling, almost, thinking of the years apart where she’d been like this with no one to help her like you were now.
All you wanted to do was wipe away her tears, to embrace her, to tell her everything was okay. But that was entirely unrealistic, because you had no idea where you stood with her and telling someone in her state that everything was okay was entirely meaningless. Seeing her so vulnerable and so wrecked was a reminder of exactly how much she meant to you.
So, it was in that elevator, you made a split-second decision; from that moment on, you were going to do anything to fix this ridge between you. You had her a year ago but royally screwed up your chance. You had her ten years ago and screwed up that chance too. You weren’t about to let history repeat itself for the third time.
“Here we go, you sit down here, okay? I’ll be back in a minute.” You carefully urged her to sit on the armchair in her room, and she did, but only for about a second. When she saw you walk away from her, she shot up out of her chair, mumbling some rushed Spanish you couldn’t quite make out as she tried to follow wherever you were going. “I’m just getting you some water from the fridge.”
“Don’t go.” She sighed heavily, her eyelids drooping slightly from the alcohol in her system mixed with the overload of emotions from the day she’d had. She sounded wrecked when she spoke, and she looked at you with a desperation that made your heart stop. “Please don’t go. Not… not again.”
You nodded reassuringly, heading back over to her and tentatively taking hold of one of her hands. She immediately brought it up to her lips and kissed your knuckles, some more tears making their way out.
“I’m not going anywhere. Not right now.” You told her quietly, watching as she closed her eyes, maybe in relief, before she slumped back down into the chair. Her head fell back and you heard some more cries from her, but she seemed to be making as much an effort as she could to stifle them. That was perhaps more heartbreaking than the sound of her sobs. “Here you go. Drink some water.”
With shaking hands, she managed to get the bottle open after a few tries, and you sat on the edge of the bed across from her. Some minutes passed by as you gazed at her and she calmed down, and weirdly, it didn’t feel uncomfortable or charged with vitriol like it did last time. Things seemed to be… in the past. Of course, all the emotions and feelings were still there, both of you could sense the elephant in the room and you didn’t dance around it for too long before one of you spoke.
“How… how did we end up like this.” Alexia mumbled. You didn’t have an answer for her. There was too much to say but it didn’t feel like anything could cover it.
“I don’t know.” You whispered back. The blonde tore her eyes away from the label of the water bottle that she messed with and met your gaze. The concerned look on your face made her smile, just for a second. “I really don’t know.”
“I want you to know that I am sorry. For my part in everything.” She rushed out like she was afraid of your reaction, her attention back on the water bottle she’d gotten through half of already.
The apology caught you by surprise. You weren’t sure what you were expecting but it wasn’t that.
“I’m sorry too.” You replied some time after.
It also caught Alexia by surprise as well, if the way her head snapped up at you and her eyebrows raised and her eyes widened was anything to go by. You smiled shyly at her, only for the hopeful glint in her eyes to cause your breath to hitch in your throat. It was the first time in… well, the first time ever, that you felt this rift could be fixed. She seemed to want the same thing, and you hoped to god that the alcohol in her system wasn’t affecting her clarity.
“Why did you come here? At the bar, why did you help me?” She wondered, her eyebrows pinched together then, seemingly confused.
“Because no matter what’s happened between us, I couldn’t leave you like that. You seemed like you needed help.” You answered initially, before pausing for a second. Alexia nodded for you to continue. “What happened today, Ale? For you to get like this?”
The midfielder huffed, fidgeting in her seat and blinking away yet more tears that tried to fight their way out.
“I… there is a lot on my mind. Has been for a while. And my team, Spain, we were playing an important game today. For an Olympic medal. I…” She frowned, turning her head so that you couldn’t see her face. She seemed ashamed of herself when she spoke again. “I missed a penalty that would have made us level, it would have given us a chance and I… I missed it.”
The bottle dropped to the floor as she covered her face with her hands, her chest heaving as she leaned forwards to rest her elbows on her knees, shoulders shaking again like they did earlier. The sobs leaving her, much like before, were difficult to hear because they sounded like they’d been repressed for far longer than a few hours. Before you could react, though, she was talking again.
“I have missed so many big chances. I missed today. I missed last year with you. I messed up my knee twice. I messed up with you when I broke up with you. I can’t… do anything right.”
As soon as she finished, you were up from your seat and heading over to kneel in front of her. You gently pulled her hands from her face and wrapped your arms around her, encouraging her to do the same as she leaned her forehead against your shoulder. And for a while, the two of you stayed like that. Alexia cried and cried until she exhausted herself, you weren’t sure how long she went on, but you weren’t going to stop her at any point. She needed that more than anything else.
Until she pulled back suddenly and put her hands on your cheeks, cradling them tenderly and stroking her thumbs across your cheekbones. You weren’t expecting it, but… you didn’t stop it either. Even when she leaned down and pressed her forehead against yours.
“So much time has gone by. I haven’t forgotten you, cariño, I told you I never would.” She said, her voice hoarse and hardly there. “I never forgot you, never will.”
You wanted to tell her how you felt, wanted to tell her that hearing her say that was the best thing you’d heard in ten years, wanted to tell her you still loved her. But the time wasn’t right.
“Thank you.” You decided to say, and you saw how her face fell, before she quickly disguised her disappointment and gave a tight-lipped smile instead. “You’re exhausted, Ale. You should go to bed, get some rest. Sleep this off.”
“What will you do?” The fear and the anxiety in her tone then, you knew all too well. It was exactly what you felt back then and the resemblance gave you goosebumps. How things had changed.
“I’ll stay for a little while. As long as you get in bed and try to rest.”
Thankfully, she did as you said, and no more than ten minutes later, the blonde was under the covers with only the small bedside lamp on so that you could see. She lay on her stomach facing away from where you sat against the headboard beside her, finally having a second to think for yourself and process all that had happened. The thing you landed on first, the main feeling you could identify, was how overwhelmed you felt. You couldn’t think clearly when she was in bed next to you.
When you thought she was asleep, her breathing even and quiet compared to how she was before when she was worked up, you took a chance and leaned down to leave a kiss on her shoulder. It seemingly went off without a hitch, so with tears of your own forming, you quietly got off the bed and headed towards the door.
“You leaving?” Alexia asked in a half-asleep mumble. When you paused with your hand on the handle, she waited a minute before carrying on. “It’s okay. See you around. Hopefully.”
—
It was inevitable that you’d end up back here. Back in the city you met her.
After she’d said that phrase to you, the same phrase that really started it all, you knew it was only a matter of time before you saw her again. Because that time in Paris, it had been different.
If someone asked you why, you would say you weren’t sure. It was a gut feeling, not a certainty. The same gut feeling that took you around the world even though it seemed nothing ever truly surmounted from it. However, in the end, something had. It led you back to Alexia.
After you closed the door to her hotel room behind her once you left, you leaned back against it and put a hand over your mouth to cover your own cries that forced their way out. She was right behind you in the room, she could probably hear you, but you didn’t care. She had apologised and told you she hadn’t forgotten about you. Those two things meant so much more than they seemed to on the surface.
As you walked down the familiar streets of Barcelona, the past ten years flashed by in a similar way to how people thought your life flashed by before the end. All the anguish, the resentment, the guilt and regret, they strolled right on by. You ignored them and focused on the good. Albeit, there wasn’t much of that, but enough that you felt sure in what you were about to do. This wasn’t the end, this was the beginning again. This was one door closing and another one opening as you entered a cafe you knew like the back of your hand, even a decade on.
She was sat at the same table you always used to sit at. A booth by the window in the back corner. Closed off enough from the other customers with a view of the streets you both walked together in the past. Her hand in yours, hidden in the pocket of her coat.
Her back was to you as went over, so by the time you got there and went to sit down, she was flustered, standing up out of nerves yet unsure of how to greet you. To put her at ease, you giggled softly, then sat down across from her. She let out a relieved sigh before crossing her arms on the table and taking in the sight of you in front of her. It was the first time she properly had the chance.
You looked older, ten years had passed so of course you did, but nothing about you had changed that much. You were still the same person she fell in love with and that’s all that mattered to her.
“Hi.” You finally said.
“Hi.” She replied.
The pair of you shared tearful smiles and one of Alexia’s hands drifted across the table to take one of yours. With her in front of you, the same girl you bumped into at University, and her hand, that was slightly weathered by the years of sports, holding yours, it felt like no time had passed at all.
—
shamelessly inspired by tyler the creator! i had the majority of this done until that anon decided to drop by last night and then that kinda put me off this one but it's whatever! i know this was a bit of a heavy read so i thank you for sticking with it and i hope it was enjoyable nevertheless <3
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If You Were My Little Girl
Alexia Putellas x Teen!Reader
Jenni Hermoso x Teen!Reader
Summary: Alexia doesn't know you
Jenni.
That's the first thing Alexia thinks of when she sees you.
You're fourteen, playing a five a side game at La Masia. Alexia's dropped in to watch the training session, a few hours early to a meeting she's meant to be having.
Jenni's the one that Alexia thinks of.
You look like her. In your face. In your height. In the way you shoot and find the net.
In the way your face crinkles as you turn to celebrate.
A young Jenni.
Jenni is the first thing Alexia think of when she sees you next.
You're fifteen now and growing into your lanky limbs.
Not much has changed in you since that last time, apart from looking much more self assured. You take shots from distance now. You're accurate as well, the ball going in nine times out of ten.
You've grown into Jenni's features now and Alexia's awestruck by them.
She passively mentions you at the next camp.
Jenni's face goes cloudy, something between annoyance and rage.
"I have no family in Barcelona, Alexia," Is what she says, conversation closed.
But Alexia's not so sure.
She doesn't broach the topic again until a year later.
It's been a while since Alexia has watched a Barcelona B match. She's familiar with a lot of the girls who move up and down into the first team when injuries allow.
Vicky has been the star so far.
Martina too.
You've never been moved up though but Alexia isn't surprised by that. Their front line is packed and with the introduction of Ewa, it's hard to give minutes over to a young striker like you.
Alexia wonders briefly if you'll leave like Julia did or if Barcelona will want to keep you close and send you out on loan.
She'd prefer to keep you.
A La Masia Jenni would be a boost to anyone's team.
You pop goals in like they're easy, grinning and Alexia knows now that Jenni has been lying to her.
Hermoso is what is on your shirt.
You're family and Jenni is a liar.
You turn sixteen at a restaurant in central Barcelona.
Alexia is there but only by accident.
It's after one of her matches and she goes out with her mother and her sister.
They've already sat down when the host comes down to move you and a woman into the table next to them.
You haven't even noticed Alexia, talking to the woman opposite you in rapid Catalan that would never fall from Jenni's lips.
It's your birthday, if the big birthday badge on the front of your shirt is anything to go by.
You dig into your meal happily.
"A gift from your father," The woman says, placing an envelope onto the table.
You were smiling before but your face goes cloudy now, the same kind of cloud that Alexia saw on Jenni's face a few years ago. Annoyance and anger.
You shove it away.
"I don't want it," You say and Alexia doesn't even pretend she's not eavesdropping.
"You need to save up," The woman reminds you," You age out of the system soon."
You look away from her. "I don't need his money."
"You do."
"I don't want it."
"I don't really think it's up to you," The woman says," Think of your future."
You don't answer for a moment before you push your half finished plate away from you.
"I'm done."
"Y/n-"
"I'm finished."
"Not even dessert? You've been wanting the cake from this place for a while now."
Tears spill from your eyes but you keep your voice steady. "I'm not hungry anymore."
You leave your birthday badge at the table along with the envelope.
Alexia doesn't see you for a long few months after that but you never leave her mind.
She keeps up to date with your training, with the way that your coaches have nothing but glowing remarks for you. She thinks you're doing well, in football at least because the next time she physically sees you, you're a mess.
Your hair is unkempt and messy. Your shoulders are slumped and even though you bang in goals, you don't celebrate even when everyone else does.
It's almost like you don't care.
It's almost like you have no passion for football anymore.
"I don't have family in Barcelona, Alexia," Jenni says again when she tries to broach the subject again.
"I know but there's this kid...this girl-"
"I don't have a sister!" Jenni snaps and Alexia takes a step back.
"I didn't say anything about a sister."
Jenni seethes, glancing away as she runs her hand through her own messy hair. "Good. Because I don't have one."
"Just come to a game." Alexia can't stop herself from pushing. She doesn't know what it is, what strange aura you have around you that pushes her to campaign for you. "Just one."
She doesn't know what it is about you that she just needs Jenni to see. What spark in you that she needs Jenni to acknowledge.
"I don't want to. I'm busy."
"I know you're going to a party with Mariona," Alexia says," I know you'll be in the city during one of her games. Please, Jenni. Just one game. You don't even have to talk to her. Just watch."
Jenni agrees only after days of badgering.
Somehow, you look worse than before.
You still bang in goals. a hattrick in the first half and Jenni's thoroughly disinterested, even if you wear her surname on your jersey.
Your hair is a mess and your kit is askew. There are bags under your eyes and your shoulders are hunched over.
You curl into yourself even more when you walk through the tunnel at halftime. Your eyes catch Alexia's.
She's been coming to these matches a lot recently but it's not her that causes you to stop.
Jenni looks down at you from the stands, her face neutral and one singular brow raised when you deign to meet her gaze.
Alexia frowns as your eyes drop and your posture tightens up again, head bowed as you walk away.
"You're still playing? I thought you were told to stop."
"He can't tell me what to do."
"Can't he?"
"Well, he's not exactly my father, is he?"
"You wear his name."
"It's my name!"
"Is it?"
"Don't-Don't tell him. Please."
"He'll find out sooner or later. A club like Barcelona, what were you thinking?"
"Please...Please."
"Quit while you're ahead, kid. Finish up your season and find something else to do."
"I-"
"It's for your own good, okay?"
Alexia rounds the corner at the end of the match.
You're sobbing, tears rolling down your cheeks as you slam your head against the stone wall.
"Hey...Hey!"
Alexia shoves her hand between your skull and the wall, trying to pillow the impact as much as possible.
You're still sobbing and Alexia pulls you into her arms, pressing your head into her neck as you shake.
"I-I have to quit."
"No you don't," She says," It's okay. You don't have to quit."
"I do."
These are the first words she's even spoken to you.
You know she watches you. You know that she lurks and analyses and sees something in you that keeps her coming back again and again.
You don't even know her. Not personally anyway.
Everyone knows Alexia Putellas. Everyone knows who she is, a legend.
You know her the same amount that you know your own sister.
Which isn't much.
She doesn't really know you either. Knows the same amount about you as your own sister.
But here she is, holding you as you sob after one of the best games of your life, holding you after you've been told to leave this all behind.
"It's okay. No one's going to make you quit if you don't want to."
"I have to."
"You don't," Alexia promises," I'll make sure of it."
#woso x reader#alexia putellas x reader#alexia putellas#jenni hermoso x reader#jenni hermoso#woso community#woso imagine#woso fanfics#woso
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because I’m a greedy ho, may I also request:
the hands. on the waist. oh my god.
with Neyo 👀🫣 do not perceive me pls
A/N: My friend. When I tell you that this awoke me out of a dead sleep in the middle of the night last night. I instantly bumped it to the top of the queue. Who has deadlines? NOT THIS SIMP! Please enjoy, and thank you for the ask!
Pairing: Commander Neyo x Reader (GN)
Rating: T but minors DNI as always
Wordcount: 1,556
Warnings and tags: fluff; minor injury; mention of blood; kissing; Neyo identifies as a warning
Summary: Marshal Commander Neyo takes his favorite medic for a ride. It’s not as sexy as it sounds… or is it?
Masterlist | Sign up for my tag list
“Commander, we’ve lost contact with CT-2639 on the eastern perimeter.”
Marshal Commander Neyo swiveled his head, pulling away from your hands as you cleaned the cut on his forehead. Head wounds always bled like a mudscuffer, and this one had made an unbelievable mess, but it wasn’t severe enough to be life-threatening. You silently followed his movement, continuing to work as Neyo replied to the trooper.
“Send a BARC trooper to reinforce his position,” Neyo snapped, clearly irritated that the situation had not already been handled several rungs down the command ladder.
“They’re all out on scouting missions, sir,” the trooper said nervously.
Neyo nodded shortly, then turned back to you. “You, medic. Grab a medkit. You’re coming with me.”
It galled you slightly that he hadn’t bothered to learn your name, even though he had refused to allow any of the other medics in the 91st treat him since the first time you’d patched him up months ago, but given that he was one of the highest-ranking clones in the GAR, you weren’t about to call him out.
“Yes, sir,” you replied, quickly sealing the laceration with a spray bandage. Luckily, you were nearly finished treating him before the trooper had interrupted; otherwise, you had no doubt the commander would have simply shoved his bucket back onto his bloody head and jumped on a BARC speeder.
You shrugged the heavy medpack onto your back and followed Neyo to a BARC speeder with an auxiliary stretcher, watching him nervously, dread swirling in your gut.
“Well?” he asked, his tone clipped and impatient.
“I’m not speeder trained, sir. Sorry, sir,” you admitted, hoping that he wouldn’t reassign you to a different unit as he tended to do when his subordinates weren’t up to his frankly unrealistic standards.
His sigh was audible through his helmet’s speaker. “Climb on the back.”
“Sir?” you asked, startled. It was going to be one hell of a tight fit on a speeder designed for one.
“Secure the medpack to the bike and get the kriff on,” he growled. “We don’t have all day.”
“Yes, sir,” you said, snapping rigidly to attention.
You squeezed in behind him, trying very hard not to think about the way his hips pressed your thighs open, or the way his strong back felt against your chest as you wrapped your arms around him and hung on for dear life. The BARC speeder was unbelievably fast, and the landscape whizzed by in a dizzying blur as Neyo expertly navigated to CT-2639’s last known position. The bike turned abruptly, and you unconsciously tightened your arms harder around his torso. He dropped his hand briefly from the controls and settled it over yours, adjusting your position so you gripped his belt instead of the slick plastoid of his chestplate, then raised it back to the handlebar.
The bike slowed as you approached your destination, sweeping the terrain for any sign of the missing sentry. A flash of white and red plastoid at the bottom of a ravine drew Neyo’s eye.
“There.”
The speeder came to a halt, and you jumped off, grabbing the medpack and running to the downed trooper. He was unconscious, but his vitals were strong enough—for the moment—and Neyo helped you stabilize his spine as you carefully transferred and secured the patient to the stretcher on the side of the BARC.
“Bike isn’t powerful enough to carry three,” Neyo said as he mounted the speeder.
You nodded in understanding. “Yes, sir. I’ll make my way back on foot. He needs more care than I can give him here, and the base medics are equipped for it.”
“Negative. Hold position here. I’ll send someone to extract you.”
“Yes, sir.” You hesitated, and Neyo looked up at you, his helmet blocking his expression—not that you’d ever been particularly good at reading the commander’s cold, hard eyes. “What’s his name?”
Neyo was silent for a beat. “Boey.” His helmet tilted as he surveyed you from head to toe, as if suddenly realizing he was about to ditch you in an active war zone without armor or weapons. He handed you his DC-15 and climbed back onto the speeder. “Try not to get killed.”
Luckily, no battle droids appeared to ruin your day. You didn’t have to wait long before you heard the whine of a speeder approaching your position, but you were surprised to see not one, but two BARCs appear, and one of them was the commander himself. He drew to a halt, and you immediately surrendered the blaster to him. The other trooper looked back and forth between you and Neyo, but stayed silent.
“Boey?” you asked.
“He’ll make it,” Neyo replied, sliding forward to make space for you. “Get on.”
You obeyed, feeling very thankful that it was a short trip to the base as you once again straddled Neyo’s hips and tried to think unsexy thoughts.
For kriff’s sake, he doesn’t even know my name. He’s kind of a dick. Why am I like this? Maybe when he reassigns me for not having achieved every single karking qualification in the GAR, I’ll end up in the 212th—if I’m going to have an unprofessional and inappropriate crush on a superior officer, Commander Cody seems like a nice, safe choice. Why do I always seem to go for the dicks? Some mysteries may never be solved.
Neyo started up the speeder and took off at top speed, leaving the other BARC trooper behind to secure the position. Unfortunately for your sanity, it seemed that Neyo had decided to inspect the entire perimeter, because there was no sign of the base anywhere, and the ride seemed interminable. As you gradually became accustomed to the speed of the bike, you tore your eyes away from the center of his back and began to look around at the landscape as you hurtled through the air.
It was actually a beautiful planet, when there wasn’t an active battle going on. Neyo drew the bike to a halt at the edge of a cliff with a stunning view out over the lush forest. He pulled off his helmet and set it on the bike, then dismounted, holding out his hand to assist you off the speeder.
When you met his eyes, they were as hard, cold, and unreadable as ever, and you couldn’t help wondering if he’d decided to just dropkick you off the cliff instead of bothering with the hassle of reassignment paperwork. Well, if this view was the last thing you ever saw, you couldn’t deny that it was breathtaking.
“What is this place?” you asked, unable to keep the awe out of your voice.
“Western perimeter. Cliff provides a natural defense.”
You looked down over the cliff and immediately regretted your decision, feeling dizzy and lightheaded at the distance to the bottom. You swayed dangerously, and Neyo grabbed you by the waist and pulled you back from the edge, your back colliding with his armored chest.
“Damn, that’s a… hell of a drop,” you managed to say.
“Mm-hmm,” he agreed, his voice low and close to your ear.
You couldn’t resist asking, “Is this where you dispose of medics who don’t know how to ride speeders?”
“What?” You felt his head turn as he observed you closely. “Why the kriff would I expect a medic to be BARC speeder certified? Do you know how much training BARC troopers have?”
You cleared your throat, trying not to dwell on how very, very close he was; or the deep, quiet rumble of his voice next to your ear; or the way his hands still rested on your waist. “So… you’re not going to reassign me?”
“I should,” he said quietly.
Your heart plummeted and your stomach twisted. You stared down at the ground in front of you, desperately trying to hide your embarrassment and disappointment.
One of his hands slid forward, flattening over your belly and pulling your body back against him. You felt the rough fabric of his glove move softly across your jaw as he tilted your face toward him with his other hand. His thumb brushed your lips, and then his hand drifted down to rest at the base of your throat, your pulse racing wildly beneath the gentle pressure.
“I shouldn’t—” His lips were so close to yours that you felt his breath ghost over your skin as he spoke. “—with a subordinate…”
You couldn’t tear your gaze away from his mouth. It was all you could see as you whispered, “You’re a marshal commander. Everyone is your subordinate.”
He drew a shallow breath, but made no move to close the tiny distance between you. The moment stretched out unbearably, until at last you could no longer resist the temptation. The tip of your tongue barely grazed the corner of his mouth before he snapped, crashing his lips into yours, clutching your body against his as though, if he only held you tightly enough, he could feel your warmth through the cold, unyielding plastoid of his armor. He kissed you with a passion that left you breathless and reeling, and when at last his lips parted from yours, he nuzzled your face gently as he whispered your name.
“Wait…” you breathed. “You know my name?”
For the first time since you’d met him, Neyo smiled. “I’ve always known.”
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Want some spicy Neyo content? Check out my fics Everybody Hates Neyo Part 1 and Part 2!
#commander neyo#commander neyo x reader#neyo x reader#star wars#clone wars#star wars fanfiction#clone wars fanfic#ask fic#dystopicjumpsuit writes
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Secrets of the pitch
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A bit of backstory first
Me and Lucy have known each other since she played for Sunderland and I played for Watford. We met when she was 19 and I was 17 we didn't get to gather until I was 20 and she was 22 by that time, she was playing for Liverpool and I was playing for Manchester City. We have been together since then, and now we are playing at Barcelona. That's all the back story.
20 August 2023
We were in a World Cup final for the first time ever. We were on the bus on our way to the stadium. It's 9:00 a.m. and kick-off is at 11:00 a.m. I'm sitting next to Lucy she was watching some TV show. One of the Barc girls recommended I have my head laid on her shoulder, her head on top of mine, and we stayed like that for the rest of the ride. Most of the girls were too nervous to make jokes or sing, so the bus is pretty quiet which isn't normal.
The bus stops. We all get off, go to the changing room, and look around for a bit. It's time to find out who is in the starting 11. We all sit in our cubicles and wait for her to tell us who is in. The starting 11
She opens a folded piece of paper and starts to say the names "Mary, Millie, Alex, Rachel, Kira, Georgia, Y/N, Lauren, Alessia, Lucy, and Jess. We will be playing in a 3-4-1-2 format, and everyone else is on the bench. Good luck, girls. You have about an hour before warm-ups, so do what you want.
Skip an hour
We got changed into our training kits and went to warm up. There are people in the stadium already. I look around for a second and go and stretch. After we are done I jog in and get changed. After the ones on the bench go out and sit in their seats, we line up at 10:45. We are just waiting. Now I rub my knee because it started to hurt. The Spanish team comes out and lines up. I look at the players as they walk past.
I noticed a few faces I recognize from Barca. At 10:55, we went out and did our national anthems and got ready for the whistle at 11:02.
Commentator
SAVE! A long bronze throw-in causes some issues inside the Spain area, with a loose ball falling for Hemp. The England striker drills a low left-footed strike towards the bottom-right corner, where Coll saves the first chance of the game with ease.
The goalkeeper passes the ball to Banmati. We run, and Lucy gets the ball. She's trapped by Spanish plays. One gets the ball from her and passes to Olga Carmona. Garcia she runs it's like slow motion. She pulls her foot back and drives it in to the ball. Mary was too late the net ripples.
Half time comes quick. Spain 1 England 0
Me Alessia Rachel out, Lauren James Chloe Kelly and Ella Toon in
Nothing more happens other than Lauren Hemp getting a yellow, a penalty to Spain, which Mary saves, and another yellow given out to a Spanish player at 12:59.
1 minute left, there was no possible way to win we had lost the World Cup
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Right this is only part 1 part 2 will be out sometime in the next 2 weeks
#women’s football#women’s soccer#women’s super league#womens world cup#wwc 2023#lucy bronze#barcelona femeni
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In Baltimore City, MD: Delightful, enthusiastic, and adorably speckled fellow looking for love - BARCS, Baltimore MD
If you can offer a lifeline to Fire Marshal with a loving foster home, please email [email protected]
Fire Marshal- 1 y/o, unaltered male, 38lbs
1-year-old Fire Marshal is a delightful with a personality that’s sure to make you smile! He’s petite and charming, with a handsomeness that’s hard to miss—especially with that adorable front tooth that sometimes sticks out and his signature head tilt that’s simply too cute.
When it’s time for a walk, Fire Marshal is all about it! He’s enthusiastic and excited to head out of his kennel, ready to explore the world around him. While he can pull on the leash at times, his love for treats makes him easy to redirect, and his willingness to work for a snack shows that he’s ready to learn and follow instructions.
Fire Marshal has a medium size build and is the perfect mix of playful and manageable. His absolute favorite thing in the world is toys! He’ll happily trade you a toy for a treat, and watching him happily engage with his toys is sure to brighten your day. He’s also got the basics down, already knowing "sit" and ready to pick up more commands with some fun training.
This sweet, playful boy would thrive in an active home where he can enjoy regular walks, play sessions, and lots of attention. Fire Marshal is the kind of dog who will keep you entertained with his playful energy and melt your heart with his lovable nature. If you’re looking for a cute, fun companion with a ton of personality, Fire Marshal is your guy!
While in our care, Fire Marshal has shown unsocialized and/or uncomfortable behavior around most other dogs and is severely reactive at the barrier. Over the days spent with us, in order to help with his social skills, Fire Marshal has gotten out in the yard for supervised interactions, first entering the area wearing a muzzle that has ultimately been able to be removed for appropriate play. He has also shown high prey drive, so it is recommended he go to a home with no other animals.
Fire Marshal has shown to have high toy drive and can be grabby when taking food from your hand, so exercising caution, especially around young children, is recommended to avoid the risk of accidental tooth contact with hands.
Fire Marshal is currently being treated for an upper respiratory infection, but appears otherwise healthy at this time. A full medical summary can be provided upon request.
Sweet, handsome and speckly Fire Marshal is available immediately for rescue pick-up.
Please let us know if your organization can help!
Thank you,
The BARCS Rescue Team
Baltimore Animal Rescue & Care Shelter (BARCS) New Address! 2490 Giles Rd, Baltimore, MD 21225 [email protected]| (410) 396-4695
Rescue pick-up hours: Monday-Friday: 10:30 a.m.-6:30 p.m. Saturday and Sunday: 8:30 a.m.-4:30 p.m
Adoption hours: Monday-Friday: 2 p.m.-6 p.m. Saturday and Sunday: 11 a.m.-4 p.m.
#dog rescue maryland#dog rescue#dog rescue baltimore maryland#doglover#dog adoption maryland#cute animals#adopt a dog#pets#fostering dogs
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Linden Understory (she/her). District Seven Tribute. Twenty-three. Daisy Ridley.
Growing up, Linden was always careful. whether that be in the literal sense (growing up surrounded by trees getting chopped down made you pretty situationally aware) or more abstract (always making sure there was enough money, to never run out). Linden always had enough, although the definition of enough was certainly nothing like the capitol’s. Her parents took care of her, their little house had enough blankets to keep warm, and though food money was tight, there was always dinner.
Life wasn’t kind, but it wasn’t bad.
Her parents liked her, even if they weren’t always around. They were busy, in the woods. An only child, Linden was left in their little home alone often, told to amuse herself and not to get into trouble.Until she got big enough to start working in the woods, hauling wood from the felled trees to the trucks that would take them to the train, or wherever it was they went. And then, she was handed a saw, and she was cutting those trees into wooden chunks. Pay was about the same, but she enjoyed staying in one place a lot more, even if it was an equally physically demanding job.
She had her friends, though. The people she grew up with, the ones she gossiped with. And one boy, Barc, who she… well, they were a bit more than friends for a few years. Until the day that Linden found out she was pregnant. She told him the next morning, and while she hadn’t been sure what to expect (they were both so young, only nineteen) she had expected to see him again. But she didn’t. The very next day, he’d transferred away to another lumber yard. Last she heard, he was learning to operate those loaders. She could’ve followed, but the message was clear.
He was out. She was doing this alone.
Her dad died that winter. Cholera, maybe, or the flu. They never called a doctor. Something bad had left him coughing for days until he’d stilled, and then gone into the ground. Her mother and her both had to work harder to keep the food and the lights coming. And then, near the end, she couldn’t work at all. She could’ve tried, but her mom didn’t let her, insisting she stay home with the new baby: Elowyn Understory. And little Ellie needed her mom, so Linden obliged.
Linden stayed with Ellie as long as she could, took care of cooking and washing and budget and everything she could. She was grateful to her mom’s working so hard for them both. Too hard, as it would turn out. One day, Oaklynn came home from work on a stretcher. This time, unlike with dad, Linden called a doctor. Contact with a machine went badly, and while Oaklynn survived, she wouldn’t be able to work again. But she was alive, and Linden was more than grateful for that. Even if it put her into debt, even if she’d spend years paying it off.
So back to work Linden went, and an almost year old Ellie stayed home with her grandmother. Linden had to work harder than she’d ever worked before, and mealtimes were thinner than ever. but it was worth it. She was able to provide for them both, the two best girls in panem. Linden counted herself lucky to be able to take care of them. And she would’ve been comfortable doing that forever, if she hadn’t been reaped for 135.
Well, if she wins, she’ll be able to take care of them forever. So she better win, because who else is going to?
Token: family photo.
+ gentle, strong , determined
- singleminded, overworked, easily riled
PENNED BY: RAINY
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FILM ▷ Ramona fait son cinéma en Streaming-VF en Français
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Justwatch-hd | Voir Ramona fait son cinéma en Streaming-VF en Français
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Que s'est-il passé dans ce film ?
J'ai un résumé pour vous. Après avoir été laissé par Jules à la gare et faire une rechute, Rue fête Noël.
Tout sur les films Ramona fait son cinéma se déroule quatre ans Ramona fait son cinéma Train to B Ramona fait son cinéma et alors que les personnages se battent pour échapper à la terre en ruines à cause d'une catastrophe sans précédent .
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La qualité est assez bonne car Ramona fait son cinéma e il n'est pas ré-encodé. Les flux vidéo (H.264 ou H.265) et audio (AC3 / Ramona fait son cinéma ) sont généralement extraits d'iTunes ou d'Amazon Video, puis réinstallés dans un conteneur MKV sans sacrifier la qualité. Télécharger Euphoria Movie Season 1 Movie 6 L'un des films en streaming. Ramona fait son cinéma Miles Morales évoque sa vie entre être un collégien et devenir Ramona fait son cinéma.
Cependant, lorsque Wilson “Kingpin” Fisk Ramona fait son cinéma est un super collisionneur, un autre État captif d'une autre dimension, Peter Parker, s'est accidentellement retrouvé dans la dimension Miles.
Qd Peter a entraîné les Miles à s'améliorer,
“ Ramona fait son cinéma ” de Warner Bros a fait ses débuts au box-office britannique et irlandais avec un coup de grâce de 5 millions de livres sterling (5,9 millions de dollars), selon les chiffres de Comscore.
Au cours de son troisième week-end, “ Ant-Man And The Wasp: Quantumania ” de Disney est descendu d'une place à la deuxième place avec 1,4 million de livres sterling pour un total de 17,2 millions de livres sterling.
“ Ramona fait son cinéma ” d'Universal a collecté 1,1 million de livres sterling lors de son cinquième week-end en troisième position pour un total de 22,1 millions de livres sterling. À la quatrième place, un autre titre Universal, “ Cocaine Bear ”, a sniffé 1,09 million de livres sterling lors de son deuxième week-end pour un total de 3,6 millions de livres sterling.Pour compléter le top cinq, “What’s Love Got to Do with It?” de Studiocanal a séduit 845 838 £ lors de son deuxième week-end pour un total de 2,7 millions de £.
«Demon Slayer: Kimetsu No Yaiba – To The Swordsmith Village» de Sony a fait ses débuts à la sixième place avec 567 638 £ et l'autre début du week-end était «Heaven in Hell» de Magnetes, qui s'est incliné en 10e position avec 146 318 £.
“Close” de MUBI a fait ses débuts à la 11e place avec 128 501 £. “Aftersun” de MUBI est toujours aussi fort, avec une collection du week-end de 21 011 £, enregistrant une baisse de seulement 2% avant la semaine des Oscars. Il a 1,7 million de livres sterling à ce jour.
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While the players who play a role in the film are referred to as actors (men) or actresses (women). There is also the term extras that are used as supporting characters with few roles in the film. This is different from the main actors who have bigger and more roles. Being an actor and an actress must be demanded to have good acting talent, which is in accordance with the theme of the film he is starring in. In certain scenes, the actors role can be replaced by a stuntman or a stuntman. The existence of a stuntman is important to replace the actors doing scenes that are difficult and extreme, which are usually found in action action films.
Thanks for everything and have fun watching Primemovi.com
Here you will find all the films that you can stream online, including the films that were shown this week. If youre wondering what to see on this website, you should know that it covers genres that include crime, science, fi-fi, action, romance, thriller, comedy, drama, and anime film.
Thanks a lot. We inform everyone who is happy to receive news or information about this years film program and how to watch your favorite films. Hopefully we can be the best partner for you to find recommendations for your favorite films. Thats all from us, greetings!
Thank you for watching The Video Today.
I hope you like the videos I share. Give a thumbs up, like or share if you like what we shared so we are more excited.
Scatter a happy Ramona fait son cinéma so that the world returns in a variety of colors.
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Those are all the mayors listed at the below link.
“Global Covenant of Mayors for Climate and Energy
The Global Covenant of Mayors Canada is a collaboration between the Federation of Canadian Municipalities, ICLEI Canada, the Global Covenant of Mayors Secretariat and the International Urban Cooperation Project supported by funding from the European Union. The initiative combines two leading domestic climate programs, the Partners for Climate Protection (PCP) program and Building Adaptive and Resilient Communities (BARC), with the leading global climate program. Together we can further advance Canadian local climate action by adding value, opportunities and streamlined support for members.
Global Covenant of Mayors Canada Showcase Cities
Twenty-five Canadian municipalities were selected to join the first Showcase Cities cohort led by the Global Covenant of Mayors for Climate and Energy (GCoM) Canada. Over the next year, these municipalities will receive intensive support to help reduce their greenhouse gas (GHG) emissions and adapt to climate change.
Municipalities are on the front lines of climate change, and through this pilot project which includes technical support, training, exclusive networking opportunities and access to tools and resources, each municipality will advance their ambitious climate action objectives.
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Mechanical Engineering BARC Exam: A Complete Guide
One of the most sought-after exams for mechanical engineers hoping to work in the field of nuclear science and engineering is the Bhabha Atomic Research Centre (BARC), India's leading nuclear research facility. The BARC test, which has a demanding selection procedure, provides a distinguished route into a profession with significant responsibility and the chance to promote the country's technical developments.
1. Recognizing the BARC Assessment Every year, the BARC test is used to find engineers for a number of areas, mechanical engineering included. The test serves as a direct route to admission in the BARC Training School, which prepares engineers for careers in reactor design, nuclear physics, and other high-impact fields. The selection procedure is predicated on the results of an interview and either the GATE score or a different written exam administered by BARC.
2. Qualification Standards The following requirements must be met in order for applicants to be eligible for the BARC Mechanical Engineering exam: Educational Requirement: A minimum of 60% in a Mechanical Engineering B.E. or B.Tech degree. Age Requirement: Candidates in the general category must be under 26 years old. There is an age relaxation for restricted categories. GATE Score: Although it is not required, candidates may choose to take the BARC test or utilize their GATE score to be immediately shortlisted for an interview.
3. Exam Pattern The BARC exam for mechanical engineering comprises the following: Mode: Online (Computer-Based Test). Duration: 2 hours. Total Questions: 100 questions. Question Type: Multiple-choice questions (MCQs). Marking Scheme: Each correct answer awards 3 marks, while 1 mark is deducted for every incorrect answer.
The questions cover the core mechanical engineering subjects such as: Thermodynamics, Heat Transfer, Fluid Mechanics, Strength of Materials, Theory of Machines, Engineering Mechanics, Manufacturing Processes, Machine Design,
4. Syllabus The syllabus for the BARC exam aligns closely with the GATE syllabus for mechanical engineering. Some of the key topics include: Applied Mechanics and Design: Engineering mechanics, mechanics of materials, theory of machines, vibrations, and machine design. Fluid Mechanics and Thermal Sciences: Fluid mechanics, heat transfer, thermodynamics, and applications. Manufacturing and Industrial Engineering: Engineering materials, metal casting, forming, joining, machining, operations research, and quality management.
A solid understanding of these topics together with the ability to solve problems is essential for passing the BARC test.
5. Strategy of Preparation Exam preparation for the BARC has to be targeted: Recognize the Important Topics in the Syllabus: Start by paying close attention to the syllabus and making note of all of its contents. Study Aid: Since they provide a thorough coverage of the BARC syllabus, employ the standard textbooks and reference resources used for GATE preparation.
Practice Mock exams: You can become more comfortable with the format of the exam and learn time management skills by routinely practicing mock exams and past years' papers. mental Clarity: Put your best effort into developing a solid mental grasp of every subject. This will make answering queries based on applications easier. Editing: Editing on a regular basis is crucial. Before the test, make brief notes for fast review.
6. The Interview Procedure Those who pass the written exam and have a legitimate GATE score are invited to a BARC interview. The rigorous and in-depth interview process is well-known, since it assesses candidates' comprehension of core mechanical engineering topics. The interview panel, which is made up of professionals from different sectors, assesses the candidate's aptitude for research and development as well as their technical knowledge and problem-solving skills.
7. Professional Opportunities For mechanical engineers, passing the BARC test offers up a world of opportunities: Scientific Officer: You will work in cutting-edge research, reactor design, safety analysis, and other crucial areas as a Scientific Officer at BARC. Training and Development: The BARC Training School's one-year curriculum gives applicants the abilities and information needed to succeed in the field of nuclear research. Opportunities for the Long Term: Working at BARC provides long-term stability, growth, and the chance to support India's nuclear and scientific breakthroughs.
In summary The BARC exam offers a doorway to a career full of chances and challenges, not merely a knowledge test. It provides mechanical engineers with a special opportunity to work on some of the most important and cutting edge projects in the nation. The BARC test may be your pass to a distinguished and rewarding profession in nuclear engineering if you study well and have the appropriate attitude.
Start Your Preparation With: https://gameacademy.in/ / https://clppenny.page.link/cTBm
Recommended: https://www.youtube.com/@gblions / https://www.youtube.com/@gblionsaeje
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Bemidji Area Reading Canine program welcomes new reading companions
New Post has been published on https://petn.ws/7qCrI
Bemidji Area Reading Canine program welcomes new reading companions
In partnership with Paul Bunyan Dog Training Association, the Bemidji Area Reading Canine, or BARC, program recently announced three new teams that have completed the required training. The new teams are Libby Wickum and Sadie, Tiffany Berg and Millie, Sue Wells and Izzy, Megan Comfort and Jinx and Nina Randorf and Bucky. BARC dogs are […]
See full article at https://petn.ws/7qCrI #DogNews
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Exploring Community Service Opportunities and the Vibrant Indian Community in Houston, TX
Houston, Texas, is a city renowned for its cultural diversity, dynamic economy, and rich history. Among its many vibrant communities, the Indian community stands out for its significant contributions to the city's cultural fabric. One of the focal points for this community is India Houseinc, a nonprofit organization dedicated to providing a wide array of services and fostering community engagement. For those looking to give back, Houston offers numerous places to do community service, each providing unique opportunities to make a meaningful impact.
Community Service Opportunities in Houston
Houston is home to numerous organizations and initiatives where residents can volunteer their time and skills. Here are some notable places to do community service in Houston:
Houston Food Bank The Houston Food Bank is the largest food bank in America in distribution and is a key resource for combating hunger in the community. Volunteers can assist with sorting and packing food, distributing meals, and participating in special events. The Food Bank's efforts are crucial in ensuring that no family in Houston goes hungry.
Habitat for Humanity Habitat for Humanity provides an excellent opportunity for those interested in hands-on work. Volunteers help build and repair homes for families in need, contributing to the creation of safe and affordable housing. This experience is not only rewarding but also educational, offering volunteers practical skills in construction and teamwork.
Star of Hope Mission Star of Hope Mission is dedicated to supporting homeless individuals and families. Volunteers can get involved in various capacities, including serving meals, mentoring, and assisting with job training programs. Their work is pivotal in helping individuals transition out of homelessness and regain stability in their lives.
Big Brothers Big Sisters of Greater Houston This organization focuses on youth mentoring, pairing adult volunteers with children in need of guidance and support. Mentors play a vital role in the lives of young people, helping them navigate challenges and reach their full potential. Volunteering here is an investment in the future of Houston's youth.
Animal Shelters and Rescue Organizations For animal lovers, volunteering at local animal shelters such as the Houston SPCA or BARC Animal Shelter is a fulfilling way to contribute. Volunteers assist with animal care, adoption events, and community outreach programs, ensuring that abandoned and stray animals receive the love and care they deserve.
The Indian Community in Houston, TX
The Indian community in Houston is one of the city's most dynamic and rapidly growing populations. This community has established a robust network of cultural, social, and economic initiatives that contribute to Houston's diversity and vitality. India House plays a central role in this community, offering a variety of services and programs that cater to the needs of Indian Americans and the broader Houston population.
India House: A Hub for Community Engagement
India House is more than just a cultural center; it is a cornerstone of the Indian community in Houston. Established to promote Indian culture and heritage, India House provides a range of services including health and wellness programs, educational workshops, and social events. The center serves as a meeting place where people can connect, celebrate, and support each other.
Cultural Celebrations and Festivals
One of the hallmarks of the Indian community in Houston is the vibrant celebration of cultural festivals. Events such as Diwali, Holi, and Navratri are celebrated with great enthusiasm, drawing large crowds from across the city. These festivals are not only a time for celebration but also for cultural education, as they provide an opportunity for people of all backgrounds to learn about Indian traditions and customs.
Educational and Professional Development
The Indian community places a strong emphasis on education and professional development. India House offers a variety of educational programs, including tutoring for students, professional workshops, and career counseling. These programs are designed to empower individuals with the skills and knowledge they need to succeed in their academic and professional lives.
Health and Wellness Initiatives
Recognizing the importance of health and wellness, India House offers several health-related services. These include medical clinics, yoga and fitness classes, and health fairs. By providing these services, India House ensures that community members have access to essential health resources and can lead healthy, active lives.
Community Service and Philanthropy
Philanthropy is a core value within the Indian community, and many individuals and organizations are dedicated to giving back. India House itself is heavily involved in community service, organizing various volunteer opportunities and charity events. From food drives to disaster relief efforts, the community actively participates in initiatives that support those in need.
Conclusion
Houston is a city of opportunity and generosity, offering countless ways for residents to get involved and give back through community service. Whether it’s volunteering at a food bank, building homes, mentoring youth, or caring for animals, there are numerous places to do community service in Houston that can make a significant difference.
Simultaneously, the Indian community in Houston, centered around institutions like India House, exemplifies the power of cultural cohesion and community support. Through cultural celebrations, educational programs, health initiatives, and philanthropic efforts, this community not only preserves its rich heritage but also contributes significantly to the broader Houston society. For anyone looking to experience the warmth of this community or to find fulfilling volunteer opportunities, Houston—and India House in particular—offers a welcoming and vibrant environment.
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Mumbai's Scientific Renaissance: The Role of Laboratories in Fueling Innovation
Mumbai, which is frequently referred to as India's financial hub, is becoming known for its scientific advancements and research. The growing number of laboratories in Mumbai, which are spearheading a new era of scientific discovery and technological growth, is partly responsible for this transition. Featuring state-of-the-art biomedical research and innovative IT advancements, these labs are leading a scientific rebirth that might transform the city's reputation worldwide.
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The Emergence of High-Tech Laboratories
Modern laboratories have been established in Mumbai, and this has sped up scientific research in the past few years. Leading this effort are organizations like the Bhabha Atomic Research Centre (BARC), the Homi Bhabha Centre for Science Education (HBCSE), and the Tata Institute of Fundamental Research (TIFR). The state-of-the-art technology in these labs allows scientists to perform research that is on par with international standards.
The financing that has come in from the public and commercial sectors has been crucial to this change. The required financial support has been made possible by programs like the Department of Science and Technology's (DST) grants and partnerships with foreign research organizations. This financing has enabled the establishment of new laboratories as well as the renovation of already-existing ones, promoting a vibrant atmosphere for scientific research.
Bridging Academia and Industry
The improvement of the ties between academia and business is one of the major effects of the laboratories in Mumbai. In order to turn scientific findings into useful applications, industries and universities are working together more and more. In the biotechnology and pharmaceutical industries, where labs are essential to drug discovery and development, this synergy is especially apparent.
Mumbai's labs have developed into creative hubs where theoretical understanding and real-world application converge. The success stories of the many firms that have come out of these research environments serve as examples of this teamwork. These entrepreneurs are creating cutting-edge solutions in the fields of artificial intelligence, healthcare, and environmental sustainability by utilizing the resources and knowledge found in the laboratories.
Cultivating Future Scientists
Beyond just doing current research and development, Mumbai's laboratories play a critical role in training the next generation of scientists. Hands-on laboratory experience is being incorporated by educational institutions into their curricula to guarantee that students are familiar with the practical side of science research from an early age. Students gain priceless knowledge and experience from programs including scholarships, internships, and joint projects with renowned academics. World-class laboratories draw talent from all around the world, resulting in a dynamic and diversified scientific community in Mumbai. The city's scientific achievements are further accelerated by this influx of foreign researchers who foster a lively interchange of ideas and viewpoints.
Addressing Global Challenges
Mumbai's laboratories are tackling global difficulties rather than just regional or national ones. Research in these labs has broad applications, ranging from fighting infectious diseases to addressing climate change. Mumbai's scientists participate in international conferences, publish in esteemed publications, and actively contribute to worldwide research endeavors. Additionally, the city's laboratories are essential in addressing to urgent problems like the COVID-19 epidemic. The scientific community in Mumbai has demonstrated its capabilities and preparedness by the rapid production of diagnostic kits, vaccinations, and therapeutic therapies.
Conclusion
Unquestionably, Mumbai's laboratories are fostering a scientific revolution and turning the city into a center for innovation and research. These facilities will propel scientific and technical advancement and establish Mumbai as a global leader in tackling some of the most critical issues facing humanity with sustained funding and support. Mumbai's scientific scene appears extremely promising as long as the city nurtures and grows its scientific talents.
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BARC provides graduate career advancement in engineering and science through an exam-based selection and interview process.
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BARC provides graduate career advancement in engineering and science through an exam-based selection and interview process.
The OCES-2024 and DGFS-2024 training and fellowship programs are being offered by the Bhabha Atomic Research Centre (BARC) Training Schools in Mumbai and Hyderabad. The OCES program is a one-year course for engineering graduates and science postgraduates, while the DGFS program is a two-year fellowship scheme for engineering graduates. Both programs provide attractive career progression opportunities in the Department of Atomic Energy (DAE) and offer training in various disciplines such as engineering, physics, chemistry, biosciences, and geology.
The OCES program aims to train engineering graduates and science postgraduates to become scientific officers in DAE units or the Atomic Energy Regulatory Board. On successful completion of the program, trainees will be appointed as scientific officers. The DGFS program, on the other hand, offers engineering graduates the opportunity to pursue a master’s degree in technology (M.Tech.) while retaining their employment in DAE. After completing the M.Tech. program, fellows are posted as scientific officers in DAE units.
Both programs provide training and research opportunities in frontier areas of science and technology, including accelerators, fuel cycle technologies, nuclear reactors, and biosciences. The programs also offer attractive career progression up to the highest echelons in DAE. Performance in the OCES program above a certain threshold entitles trainees to a Post-Graduate Diploma of Homi Bhabha National Institute (HBNI) and credits towards M.Tech. programs.
The selection process for the OCES program consists of a screening examination followed by a selection interview. The screening examination is conducted online in multiple cities across India and covers engineering and science disciplines. Candidates can also be screened based on their GATE scores. The selection interviews are held at the BARC Training School in Mumbai, except for interviews in the geology discipline, which are held in Hyderabad.
To be eligible for the OCES program, candidates must have a qualifying degree in the relevant discipline and meet the minimum aggregate marks requirement. Candidates with GATE scores must have a GATE-2022, GATE-2023, or GATE-2024 score in the same discipline as their qualifying degree. Candidates applying for the RSES training scheme must be selected through physics or chemistry OCES disciplines.
The DGFS program requires candidates to secure admission for M.Tech. in DGFS Institutes and specializations listed in Table-3. Candidates must confirm their M.Tech. admission after the announcement of the OCES-2024 Selection List. The number of DGFS Fellows selected in each specialization depends on the requirements of DAE.
During the training period, OCES Trainee Scientific Officers (TSOs) and DGFS Fellows receive a stipend and allowances. TSOs are paid a monthly stipend of Rs. 55,000/- and a one-time book allowance of Rs. 18,000/-. DGFS Fellows have their tuition fees for the M.Tech. program reimbursed and receive a one-time contingency grant of Rs. 40,000/- per annum for two years.
Upon appointment, candidates join DAE as scientific officers in a Group-A post of the Government of India with a starting pay scale in Level 10 of the 7th CPC Pay Matrix. They are also eligible for various allowances and benefits such as leave travel concession, children’s education allowance, and health services.
Selected candidates are required to execute an agreement and a personal indemnity bond to serve DAE for at least three years after completing the training. The bond amount varies for OCES TSOs and DGFS Fellows and consists of stipend/book allowance for OCES TSOs and stipend/tuition fee/contingency grant for DGFS Fellows.
The application process for the OCES/DGFS-2024 program is conducted online through the BARC website. The application fee is Rs. 500/- for male applicants belonging to the
The OCES-2024 and DGFS-2024 programs are offered by the Bhabha Atomic Research Centre (BARC) Training Schools.
The OCES program is a one-year course for engineering graduates and science postgraduates, while the DGFS program is a two-year fellowship scheme for engineering graduates.
Both programs provide attractive career progression opportunities in the Department of Atomic Energy (DAE) and offer training in various disciplines.
The OCES program aims to train graduates to become scientific officers in DAE units or the Atomic Energy Regulatory Board.
The DGFS program offers engineering graduates the opportunity to pursue a master’s degree in technology (M.Tech.) while retaining their employment in DAE.
Both programs provide training and research opportunities in frontier areas of science and technology.
The selection process for the OCES program consists of a screening examination followed by a selection interview.
During the training period, OCES Trainee Scientific Officers (TSOs) and DGFS Fellows receive a stipend and allowances.
Introduction
The OCES-2024 and DGFS-2024 programs are offered by the Bhabha Atomic Research Centre (BARC) Training Schools.
These programs provide attractive career progression opportunities in the Department of Atomic Energy (DAE).
Graduates can receive training in various disciplines and pursue rewarding careers in science and technology.
OCES Program
The OCES program is a one-year course for engineering graduates and science postgraduates.
It aims to train graduates to become scientific officers in DAE units or the Atomic Energy Regulatory Board.
Trainees will be appointed as scientific officers upon successful completion of the program.
DGFS Program
The DGFS program is a two-year fellowship scheme for engineering graduates.
It offers the opportunity to pursue a master’s degree in technology (M.Tech.) while retaining employment in DAE.
Fellows are posted as scientific officers in DAE units after completing the M.Tech. program.
Training and Research Opportunities
Both programs provide training and research opportunities in frontier areas of science and technology.
Areas of focus include accelerators, fuel cycle technologies, nuclear reactors, and biosciences.
Participants can gain valuable knowledge and skills in these cutting-edge fields.
Selection Process for OCES Program
The selection process consists of a screening examination followed by a selection interview.
The screening examination covers engineering and science disciplines and can also consider GATE scores.
Interviews are held at the BARC Training School in Mumbai, except for geology interviews which are held in Hyderabad.
Stipend and Allowances
During the training period, OCES Trainee Scientific Officers (TSOs) and DGFS Fellows receive a stipend and allowances.
TSOs receive a monthly stipend of Rs. 55,000/- and a one-time book allowance of Rs. 18,000/-.
DGFS Fellows have their M.Tech. tuition fees reimbursed and receive a one-time contingency grant of Rs. 40,000/- per annum for two years.
Career Progression
Both programs offer attractive career progression up to the highest echelons in DAE.
Performance in the OCES program above a certain threshold entitles trainees to a Post-Graduate Diploma of Homi Bhabha National Institute (HBNI) and credits towards M.Tech. programs.
Participants can achieve significant professional growth and advancement in their careers.
Application Process
The application process for the OCES/DGFS-2024 program is conducted online through the BARC website.
Male applicants belonging to the [specific category] are required to pay an application fee of Rs. 500/-.
Detailed instructions and guidelines are provided on the BARC website for a smooth application process.
Mandatory Service Period
Selected candidates are required to serve DAE for at least three years after completing the training.
An agreement and a personal indemnity bond must be executed to fulfill this requirement.
The bond amount varies for OCES TSOs and DGFS Fellows, ensuring commitment to the program and future service.
Unlock Your Potential with OCES-2024 DGFS-2024 Programs
The OCES-2024 and DGFS-2024 programs offer exciting opportunities for career growth in science and technology.
Gain valuable training, research experience, and a chance to pursue higher education while retaining employment.
Take the first step towards a rewarding career with BARC’s Training Schools.
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GIFS at USask Receives $56M for Bangladesh Agtech Centre
Key Takeaways Major Funding Commitment: The Government of Bangladesh pledges $56.2 million to a research initiative between GIFS at USask and BARC. Focus on Agtech Centre: Funding will establish the Bangabandhu-Pierre Elliott Trudeau Agriculture Technology Centre (BP-ATC) in Bangladesh. Research and Training Impact: The initiative will enhance crop research and train over 30 graduate students…
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youtube
Civil engineering interview | Civil engineering interview kaise de | #civilengineerintercview | -01
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In Baltimore City, MD: Lovable and affectionate pup with a heart full of joy and a personality that shines - BARCS, Baltimore MD
If you can possibly offer a loving foster home for Ramsay, please email [email protected]
Ramsay (Otis)- 5 y/o, altered male, 52lbs
Meet Ramsay, a lovable and affectionate pup with a heart full of joy and a personality that shines! Also lovingly called Otis by his foster family, Ramsay is a cuddle enthusiast who would happily spend his days as your lap dog. He thrives on human connection, loves belly rubs, and adores being showered with affection. Whether it’s snuggling on the couch or receiving pets, Ramsay’s sweet nature makes him an irresistible companion.
In his foster home, Ramsay has shown he’s a fast learner who’s eager to please. He’s mostly housebroken and quickly improving on his home manners. While he’s been known to steal the occasional sock or shoe, he’s easily redirected with a hard bone to chew. Ramsay is working on his leash manners. At times, he can be reactive to other dogs and people on walks, but with continued training and patience, he’s sure to thrive. In his foster home, he gets along well with the resident dog, often wrestling and playing together.
Ramsay’s playful side comes out with his occasional excited moments, but these are simply signs of his youthful exuberance. He’s a great candidate for a home willing to continue his training and provide him with the guidance he needs. While he hasn’t been around children, Ramsay’s loving nature suggests he could become a wonderful family dog with the right environment.
While in his foster home, Ramsay has reportedly show separation related behaviors that manifest as chewing things up, but he is able to be crated. He has also shown reactivity towards strangers, especially men, but this behavior has not been obvious in the shelter environment.
In BARCS' care, Ramsay has shown severe barrier reactivity towards other dogs, but once introduced without a barrier, he has shown some awkward play.
Ramsay recently underwent entropion surgery during the same time as his neuter and is currently on eye ointment and wearing an e-collar until his sutures are removed. A full medical summary can be provided upon request.
Overall, Ramsay is a total lovebug who’s ready to bring his joy, cuddles, and cheerful spirit to a forever home. If you’re looking for a sweet, trainable companion who will shower you with affection, Ramsay might be the perfect match!
Ramsay is available immediately for rescue pick-up.
Please let us know if your organization can help!
Thank you,
The BARCS Rescue Team
Baltimore Animal Rescue & Care Shelter (BARCS)
2490 Giles Rd, Baltimore, MD 21225
[email protected]| (410) 396-4695
Rescue pick-up hours:
Monday-Friday: 10:30 a.m.-6:30 p.m.
Saturday and Sunday: 8:30 a.m.-4:30 p.m
Adoption hours:
Monday-Friday: 2 p.m.-6 p.m.
Saturday and Sunday: 11 a.m.-4 p.m.
Baltimore Animal Rescue and Care Shelter, Inc. (BARCS) | 2490 Giles Rd | Baltimore, MD 21225 US
#dog rescue maryland#dog rescue#dog rescue baltimore maryland#doglover#cute animals#dog adoption maryland#adopt a dog#pets#fostering dogs
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