#balthazar would friggin. kill them.

[scoobydoodean]

...so I've realized that I interpret the "Nobody cares that you're broken" line much differently than a lot of other people? I always kind of took it as Dean saying "yeah you think you're broken, but that doesn't matter we still want you around and you still have a place here and you're still capable of helping".

I guess I took it similar to the "I'd rather have you, cursed or not", like, Dean would rather Cas be there even if he is "broken"...bc I'm sure Dean thinks of HIMSELF as broken, too, and yet he's still there and trying to move forward

Idk I was shocked when I saw how often that line was used by deancrits and realized uhh maybe my interpretation was really different hahaha

From 7.23:

DEAN: You got anything to say on the topic of Dicks? Crowley was pretty sure that you could help. CASTIEL: I can't help. You understand? I can't. I destroyed... everything, and I will destroy everything again. Can we please just leave it at that?

DEAN: No. [He gets up.] No, we can't. SAM: Dean... DEAN: We can't leave it. You let these friggin' things in. So you don't get to make a sandwich. You don't get a damned cat. Nobody cares that you're broken, Cas. Clean up your mess!

CASTIEL: You know... we should play Twister.

I... might have a more nuanced and lengthy take on this with tons and tons of context later when I make my way back through season 7, but I'll tell you what I think right now from my memory: people who hang onto this line and resent Dean for it should grow the fuck up. Which is exactly what Dean is telling Cas to do. Not because Cas isn't allowed to have feelings, but because Cas is hiding. He made a mess, and he does not want to help clean it up because if he has to help clean it up he has to face that he broke something... that his plans backfired, that he created more issues in the process of trying to solve others. Which he did. Like we can justify a lot of what Cas did in season 6, and he has an understandable perspective. But he did kill thousands of people. He did kill one of his best friends in the world for standing in his way. He did try to manipulate Dean. He did break Dean's trust. He did break Sam's wall. All while thinking he was also doing what was necessary, but it happened, and Balthazar begged him not to do what he was going to do because he knew there would be consequences Cas refused to think about, and Cas did it anyway and he killed Balthazar for opposing him, and broke Sam's wall to keep Sam and Dean and Bobby from opposing him... all while insisting it was "not broken".

Those are simply facts of what happened, and fans can not like those facts, but they exist nonetheless. Cas is not a child. He is a very very very old cosmic being, who is hiding from a situation that he is largely responsible for. Now is "nobody cares that you're broken" all Dean has to say? No. This is the same episode where Dean also says,

"Yeah, but you know what? Bottom of the ninth, and you're the only guy left on the bench... Sorry, but I'd rather have you, cursed or not. And anyway, nut up, all right? We're all cursed. I seem like good luck to you?"

And then Cas and Dean defeat Dick Roman together—as a team. Because it isn't actually about what a bad horrible person Cas is and how he needs to wallow in that and feel that or not feel that and if anyone dares to suggest he face what he did they're being mean . It's about how they're all fuck ups but they are doing their best. That's all they can ask of each other. They all have been used and abused and they have tried to clean up other people's messes and caused some of their own mess along the way which they are perpetually mopping up. They're Team Free Will (One ex-blood junkie, one dropout with six bucks to his name, and Mr. Comatose.) and they will figure it out... but only if they are all trying, and Cas, in that moment, is NOT. He is hiding. Because he feels guilty. I think Dean IS angry at Cas here for leaving them with the bag, but that... isn't unfair, but it also doesn't fully incapsulate Dean's opinions on the matter.

[and-stir-the-stars]

gravityboyfriendsnatural au where Dipper and Mabel record BABBA's "Disco Girl" over Balthazar's Mama Mia soundtrack--

[verobatto]

Destiel Chronicles

(Vol. XXII)

It was a love story from the very beginning.

Worry about you

(6x15/6x17/6x19)

Hi my friends! Today I want to talk with seriousness about one of the most hilarious episodes from season 6. And because it was written by Ben Edlund, there's juicy Destiel elements there. I will talk too about episode 18 and 19, near to the end, because I will take some points from those too.

I want to give thanks to my friend @agusvedder , she made the gifs for this meta! Love ya girl!

Ok, let's start this volume...

Balthazar calling Cas as Cassie

When 6x15 "The French Mistake" starts, Balthazar appears in Bobby's house, moving fast as Cas did in 6x03, appearing and dissapearing the whole time looking for things to use in a spell... In the middle of that loud scene, this dialogue is developed...

BALTHAZAR: Raphael is after us all. You see, he's consolidated his strength. And now he's on the move.

SAM: And where's Cas?

BALTHAZAR: Oh, Cassie? He is deep, deep underground. So, good old Raffy put out a hit list on every last Samaritan who helped our dear Cas – Including both of you. And so much more importantly, me. See, he wants to draw Cas out in the open.

First of all I want to say, each episode written by Edlund, shows us DEAN AND CAS ARE IN LOVE, each one of them. The man knew what he was doing writing their relationship as romantic. So, I would say... This wasn't the exception... Why Balthazar would name Cas as Cassie (Dean's first love?) Balthazar doesn't know that, but we do, the spectators.

Dean exaggeratedly eye fucking Misha/Cas

One of the most hilarious scenes was this one here ...

Dean playing to be Jensen playing to be Dean, and the eye fucking. Delightful, just because Dean knows Cas and him do that thing the whole time. So, he plays his role, but because Dean is an awful actor, that's the result.

Pretty interesting Dean is aware of it... Just saying.

Dean starts to worry about Cas

By the end of the episode, Raphael find the boys and Balthazar, but Cas makes his apparition. But why on Earth the camera just took Dean's facial reaction to what Cas was saying and doing?

That's fear and concern in Dean's face... He is maybe seeing things are not good... And he's worry because CAS doesn't tell him the whole thing...

CASTIEL It was Balthazar's plan. I would have done the same thing.

Castiel is in soldier mode these words made Dean be a little mad at him...

DEAN That's not comforting, Cas.

He would expect something different from his friend, like maybe, some kind of protection, and not be used as bait. So here Dean is feeling a little disappointed.

CASTIEL When will I be able to make you understand? If I lose against Raphael, we all lose. Everything.

Edlund is pointing one of the excuses for Castiel taking this kind of decisions and positions. Castiel needs desperately to win against Raphael, and he's willing to everything to fulfill that mission. Even lie to the Winchesters and work with Crowley.

DEAN Yeah, Cas. We know the stakes. That's about all you've told us!

CASTIEL I'm sorry about all this. I'll explain when I can.

Cas would love to count with them and not lie them, but he's at war.

DEAN Friggin' angels.

Edlund's Dean quote each time an angel surprisingly vanish in front of him 🤣

Jealous!Dean attacks again

In episode 6x17 "My heart will go on"

When Fate is attempting to kill Dean and Sam

In that abbandoned restaurante, i noticed something interesting. Remember I mention the colored codification started in this season? Well... We have another Destiel Coded Colored foreshadow. The burner knobs were colored in BLUE and RED, representing Dean and Cas, but toxic, angry Dean. And the whole place exploded... So... What a big and huge foreshadow for the settlement of the bid Destiel fight and break up in the following episodes, isn't?

But we're here to talk about Jealous! Dean, because we love it.

When Cas saves the boys from that explosion, this was part of the talk...

DEAN So we've pissed fate off personally.

CASTIEL If I know her – and I do – she won't stop until you're dead.

DEAN  Awesome. So what do we do?

CASTIEL Kill her.

SAM Kill fate?

CASTIEL Do you have another suggestion?

SAM No, I'm – I just mean, uh...Can you even do that?

CASTIEL Balthazar has a weapon that will work against her.

DEAN Of course he does. Yeah. Boy, that guy's just got it covered, doesn't he?You need new friends, Cas.

Do you notice the shade of jealousy here?? And then...

The dialogue between Fate and Cas showed us again how desperately was Castiel to win the war. And Balthazar was working for him. We see more about how CAS is getting into the dark side for the biggest purpose.

But even so, they showed us too, he's worry about Sam and Dean safety.

By the end of the episode, we had another dialogue between Castiel and the boys...

And Cas lies to Dean...

And then Dean makes a bad joke, and Cas dissapears again.

DEAN I'll tell you one thing about Cas, he does not appreciate the finer things.

Dean says this because isn't the first time he makes a joke and Cas vanishes. But I wonder if is related to Castiel feeling a little bit offended, and you'll know what I mean in the next point...

Dean mocking CAS, just because he enjoys it

In episode 6x19 "Mommy Dearest" we can see how since this scene happened...

So, Cas feel offended, and Sammy pointed that to Dean. Dean gets a little surprised, but...I'm sure this was very enjoyable for him, because then he'll mock him again.

Also... I want to mark here something... If Cas was able to dissapeard by flying here, I'm sure he may do it. Because... I recall that scene in the car in season 5 (last episode) when Dean mocked him about not having sense of humor, he vanished then. And the we had the Kate Winslet's breast joke, and now this one... So...

We had this one here...

Again mentioning babies, because he knows Cas got mad about that, and he repeats the action. He's enjoying it, for sure.

But we will have a sweet Innocent comment, I just wanted to share...

The thing here is the sexual innuendos in this episode, firs the famous "Cas get out of my ass!" And now this one here, so funny the double meaning... And Dean's gay panic face 🤣🤣🤣😏.

Castiel is worried about Dean

This episode showed us too, Cas in his soldier mode, can see things the boys can't. Like those little kids in that police station.

Castiel and Dean fought because CAS wasn't agreed with them in driving those kids to their home.

CAS: Dean, Dean. Millions of lives are at stakes here, not just two. Stay focused.

Castiel in soldier mode, trying to make Dean to understand the danger in his decision, but it was late, because Sam and Dean saw in those kids themselves.

DEAN: Are you kidding?

CAS: There's a greater purpose here.

Castiel's excuse to do the things he's doing.

DEAN: You know what, I-I'm getting a little sick and tired of the greater purposes, okay? I think what I'd like to do now is save a couple of kids. If you don't mind. We'll catch up. Okay guys, let's go. C'mon. (Dean walks out. Joe, Ryan and Sam follow.)

Cas and Dean are in different pages, Cas is cold minded, first killing Lenore as it was nothing, then torturing the sheriff, and now... Because he's feeling worry about Sam and Dean...

But we know he already fix this sending Crowley.

Another thing is, when Eve attacks Dean, the only one calling his name in despair was CAS...

But when he had to heal him, he took his time, studying Eve's dead body on the ground... He was worried there... Because it supposed that monster should be alive to find Purgatory...

But then Sam reminded him Dean was hurt. So he approached him, and the way he heals him caught my attention, he out his hand on Dean's shoulder... As if he wanted to say something... But he didn't. He just healed him. Maybe with a shade of relief Dean was ok...

Just an addition...NUMBER 25

Ok, the number 25 was mentioned a couple of times in this episode. It was the age of the patient that died and the address in which Eve was.

So... What does this number means? It represents the Argonaut in the arcana. The Argonaut is a Greek hero (it could be Cas) but it also represents in numerology the number 7 that means the inner war to choose the right path and the impulsiveness as a dangerous way to make the wrong decisions... It sound familiar, isn't?

To Conclude

Dean was worried about Castiel because he saw how dangerous was Raphael.

Castiel is between his soldier duty and the love he has for the Winchesters. As we will see in the following metas, he's worried about their safety.

Dean enjoys mocking CAS, that's not news...

Jealous!Dean is delightful too...

Castiel lying to their friends for the biggest purpose, as his excuse. And his impulsiveness and desperation to win a war.

I hope you like this meta, I see you in the next Chronicle. 😘💞

Tagging @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @whyjm @koshisekisen @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @angelneedshunter @trickster-archangel @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @mishka-the-angel-of-saturday @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @xsghn @foxyroxe-art @authorsararayne @anonymoustitans @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @wildligia @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-is--endgame @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel @ran-savant

If you want to be tagged, please let me know.

If you want to read the previous season 6 metas, here the links...

Vol. XV, XVI, XVII, XVIII, XIX, XX, XXI

Buenos Aires, July 31st 2019 9:14 PM

[mycasandstarrs]

SPN 6x15: “The French Mistake”

THEN: Angels are a thing. Raphael vs Castiel. Balthazar, known for stealing heavenly weapons that Cas needs. He happens to be on Cas’ side. Demonic calls. Ruby. 

‘Twas a dark and stormy night...

Hello, Balthazar.

“You did. Twice. Good for you.”

Love that snark.

Balthazar just trashing the place just to find his ingredients.

Oh dear.

Hello, Virgil.

Oh my god, the casual butt slap that Dean was not ready for, hahahaha.

And it begins.

Why would that be your first question, omg.

“Or we could have them fly at the window, then freeze frame. Then cut to black, act out.”

“Freeze frame.”

“Um, yeah, freeze frame.”

Oh goodness.

What an ambitious episode.

“Oh crap! I’m a painted whore!” Hon, there are worse things than wearing makeup.

“No, seriously. Why? Why would anybody want to watch our lives?”

“Well, I mean, according to that interviewer, not very many people do.”

pfft.

Multiple Babys.

“Dear Castiel, who art maybe running his ass away from heaven, we pray that you have your ears on. So... Breaker breaker...” Why does Dean keep mentioning Cas’ ass in these “prayers”?

I can’t stop giggling. This is clearly not Cas.

You know what tho? This scene they’re “rehearsing” is all somewhat true.

Misha’s so cute.

“Hola Mishamigos. Jsquared got me good. Really starting to feel like one of the guys.” ‘Mishamigos’ is too fucking cute.

Is this what their trailers are really like?

Dean’s okay with being from Texas.

Not as okay with being on a soap opera.

Sam’s little flinch when Dean “stabs” him.

Omg, the crew member who had to run after them.

Clif!

“Dude, we're not even in America.” Dean takes such such personal offense to being in Canada.

The paintings!

The alpaca!

Genevieve!

THE FUCKING ALPACA HAS A FRAMED PHOTO ON THE MANTEL.

Their actual wedding photo is so sweet tho

Who came up with this??

“Well, looks like you did all right.”

“Yeah. Yeah. I should figure out her name.”

Perfect joke, perfect timing.

Omg the picture of cowboy Jared.

“Money, man. there is nothing like it.” Amen.

“You have been Sam Winchester way too long.” Aww.

“We’re not doing anything illegal, are we?”

“Would it make you feel better if I said no?”

“No.”

pfft.

omg Misha.

Oh lord, here we go.

Why does Dean get so damn stiff??

NOT LIKE THAT SAM.

I’m gonna bust a lung from laughing, omg.

Misha watching what he believes is a breakdown.

“imho J and J had a late one last night. rotflmao”

“Plus, Clif says they're smuggling illegal stuff in from Mexico.” pfft, Clif snitched on them.

“Misha's celebrity tweet says it's a black-market organ thing. I'm betting drugs.” lmao.

“Look, I was up all night, looking online.” Sam didn’t even sleep.

Magic and the supernatural doesn’t exist in this universe.

“No angels.” Basically, they’re trapped.

Why hello, Virgil.

OH MY GOD. Beating the shit out of Virgil looks so wrong out of context.

“You're dead, Virgil! Virgil! I'm gonna break your friggin' neck!” LMAO WAS YELLING THAT NECESSARY.

“Maybe it'd help if I – I'll fly up and talk to them.”

“You know, I'm not sure Jared and Jensen...know who she is, strictly speaking. She's, you know, new. No offense.”

“Right.”

“Yeah, I think what we might need at this stage is for Kripke to come up himself. He created the show. They'll listen to him.”

Ok, the bullshit part of this episode. Not cool, guys.

Aww no, here comes the sad part.

nooo.

Sam’s just now realizing the damn key is gone??

“You heard my brother. That's right, I said 'brother.' 'cause you know what, Bob? We're not actors. We're hunters. We're the Winchesters. Always have been, and always will be.” Dean no. NO DEAN.

“And yeah, okay, here, maybe there's some – some fans who give a crap about this nonsense.”

Me neither.

I feel so damn sorry for Meta!Misha.

“What are you about to do?” Meta!Misha’s last words.

RIP Meta!Misha Collins. Killed by Virgil.

“Misha! He’s been stabbed to death!”

“Where?” “Where?”

“Where?!”

haha.

How did they even get past the police?

Dean was kind enough to pay the homeless man. 

“I mean, how bad can an angel with no wings be?” Pretty bad if he has guns.

RIP random guy who walked into the gun shop. Killed by Virgil.

“No hell below us, above us only sky.” Ha, “Imagine.”

“We just don't mean the same thing here. I mean, we're not even brothers here, man.” Aww.

Real Eric Kripke? [After episode edit: Nope.]

RIP Eric Kripke. Killed by Virgil.

RIP Bob Singer. Killed by Virgil.

RIP 2 or 3 people. Killed by Virgil.

GO.

Hello, Raphael.

“Raphael? Nice meatsuit. Dude looks like a lady.” REALLY DEAN.

“You see, they were so well-hidden that I needed time to find them. So, I volunteered these two marmosets for a game of fetch with Virgil. You two were such an adequate stick. Thank you. Thank you, boys.” Cat’s out.

YAASS CAS.

“If you don't want to die tonight, back off.” I FUCKING LOVE ASSERTIVE CASSSSS.

“Well, Cas...Now that you have your sword, try not to die by it.”

“Cas, what the hell? Wait, wait, you were in on this, using us a diversion?” 

“It was Balthazar's plan. I would have done the same thing.” 

Yikes.

“Yeah, Cas. We know the stakes. That's about all you've told us!” The stakes should be enough to make you understand!

Cas constantly apologizes for “all this”.

And Dean always complains about “freaking angels”.

“Oh, and, uh, we're broke again.” That’s the biggest loss.

“Hey... at least we're talking.” ha ha, Sam.

[huntertales]

Part Two: Fate is a Cruel Mistress. (My Heart Will Go On S06E17)

Episode Summary: After Balthazar changes history and keeps the Titanic from sinking, Fate intervenes and begins killing those who would have died on the ship. Castiel tells the reader, Sam and Dean that Fate is upset with the three of them and the only way they can stay alive is to kill her. Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader Word Count: 5,131.

Previous Part | Supernatural Rewrite Masterlist

Two dead bodies and a piece of gold string found at each crime scene, it was about the best lead you and the boys had going for. Along with the fact that the poor people had their lives cut short from a fatal “accident” that left you scratching your head in a bit of confusion. Nobody got beheaded by their garage door and it was more than just bad luck for someone to get choked by a fax machine after their keys somehow got misplaced behind there and their scarf got caught in the thing. But you had no valid proof something supernatural caused this to happen. There was no EMF to detect a pissed off spirit, no traces of sulfur or even a lingering smell and no hex bag to rat out a witch seeking a bit of revenge. All of it appeared to be accidental. But in the words of Dean himself, accidents just don’t happen “accidentally.”

You and the boys headed back to the motel to reevaluate the evidence that you did have and try to dig deeper on the family history of the two victims that was a little too squeaky clean. You decided while you sat at the table with Sam, both of your laptops open, and little help from the internet to guide you to an answer, there was somebody who might know something. When in doubt, you always called Bobby when you were in a pinch. But you were smart enough than to call him up when he was in such a mood. So you settled for the very next best thing—Ellen. She happily answered the phone when she noticed your incoming call.

You explained to Ellen about the situation going on, from the strange accidental deaths and the piece of gold thread pinched between your fingers. When she asked you to describe it, you tilted your head to the side and tried your hardest. “So, we found another piece of this, I don't know,” You shrugged your shoulders, not sure what kind of adjectives you could describe a piece of thread “Shiny string. It was at both scenes.”

"Oh, I was afraid of that." Ellen mumbled. You dropped the hand holding the string to the laptop keyboard, asking her why. "Oh, these so-called accidents—we're seeing 'em nationwide. About seventy-five so far. I got Jo and her crew working on a cluster in California."

"Blood relatives?" You presumed, wondering if this thing was a curse that was affecting families. But the biggest question was why people were dropping like flies because of some crazy accident. And why the hell a piece of string was left at each scene, like it was the calling card of some sick and twisted monster claiming its work.

“Some yeah, some no.” Ellen said. “She's got about what you do—pile of bodies and a whole bunch of gold thread.”

“So what's it mean?” You asked the woman.

“I don't know.” Ellen admitted. “I got Bobby working on it right now.”

You twirled the piece of string between your fingers and stared at your laptop screen, suddenly becoming worried at the mention of the man who had raised you since you were ten. You'd seen him with his ups and downs, but never bad as this. "How's he doing, by the way?" You curiously asked, trying your hardest not to worry Ellen from the sound of your voice.

“Oh, don't worry, Y/N.” Ellen reassured you. “I'm kicking his ass back to health and happiness.”

"Who asked you to? To hell with you." Bobby’s voice echoed from the other line, his crude and sarcastic attitude clear as day. The ends of your lips stretched into a faint smile deciding to take it as a sign he was doing all right. And you felt more reassured that he wouldn’t be alone during such a hard time in his life. Ever since Ellen had come into his life, she’d been nothing but good for him. And everyone else, too.

“I heard that.” You said, calling Bobby out on his rude behavior. Ellen chuckled at what unfolded and reassured you once again that he would be okay. But you knew Rufus’ untimely death didn’t just affect the older hunter. It was taking a toll on all of you. You couldn’t help but ask the woman out of concern, “Are you okay?”

"Aw, honey, you're sweet." Ellen mumbled. "You know me. I just worry about you boys."

"Yeah, well. We're all doing fine." You said. You looked up from your laptop screen to see Sam was diligently working on his laptop as Dean sat across the room on his bed, silently watching TV. You pushed yourself up to your feet and began walking over to Dean, taking the liberty to take a much needed break from your laptop and plopped yourself down on his bed. "All right, so, all these corpses, anything relate 'em?”

"Well, actually, I did dig up one thing. I just don't know what to make of it." Ellen. You hummed quietly, informing her that you were listening to what she had to say. You continued on the conversation while you mindlessly watched whatever sort of show Dean was watching. "Well, it's a weird one, and it was buried pretty deep, but Bobby and me were combing through the family trees on all the victims, and we started seeing, well, the families all came over to America the same year."

“Really? That is weird.” You noted.

"Yeah. 1912. But here's the real weird part.” Ellen said, getting to the part where you would get a kick out of. “They all came over on the same boat."

You furrowed your brow slightly, finding that bit of information way too strange for that to be a coincidence. That might be the connection to what was going on here. Only you had no possible information to make such a theory. “All right, so what's so special about the boat?”

“Nothing. It was a boat.” Ellen said. “It did what boats do.”

“What was it called?” You asked.

"The Titanic. Did you ever hear of it?" She wondered, you told her no. You weren't familiar with the name. If it was just a boat that sailed across the sea, then why the hell was it killing off its passengers families nearly a century later? And for no apparent reason, you might add. "Yeah, me neither. I'll keep digging."

You exchanged your goodbyes to the woman and ended the conversation with more information that you had to start. You thought for a moment to yourself while you sat up in bed, Dean's arm wrapped loosely around your waist, trying to somehow keep you here for a little while longer. You remained where you were, trying to think of you knew anything about this boat, if you might have learned it in school or not. There had to be something. But your mind was coming up blank on this one.

"Hey, guys," You spoke up, getting each of their attention. "Does the name Titanic ring a bell?"

Dean thought about it for a few seconds before answering no. Sam took a little longer, but even his big brain of his, the man couldn't recollect on any sort of information that connected to the Titanic. You unwillingly stepped away from the bed and Dean's embrace and back to the rickety old chair and your laptop. It took a few minutes of searching the Titanic to find a complete website dedicated to the boat. Skimming the information, you picked out what seemed slightly interesting and read it back to the boys.

"Okay, so, the RMS Titanic was the largest passenger steamship in the world when it made its maiden voyage across the North Atlantic in 1912." You read off the first paragraph you found.

“So what's the big friggin' deal?” Dean asked, not seeing what the big fuss was all about. “It's a ship. It sailed.”

"On the evening of April 14, 1912 the Titanic had a dangerously close call with an iceberg. Only the sharp eyes of the First Mate, Mr. I.P. Freely saved the ship from disaster. Despite the late hour, and poor visibility conditions, Mr. Freeley spotted the iceberg which was almost one hundred (100) feet high and four hundred (400) feet long. Emergency maneuvers averted what would surely have been a disastrous collusion. Freeley was hailed a hero by the passengers and crew.”

"Looks like there was a close call. Ship almost hit an iceberg. Luckily the first mate spotted it just in time." You said, telling the boys about the near fatal crash that took the ship down. You read more of the paragraph that told of the dangerous night that almost ended in disaster. The more you read, the more eerily strange from the coincidence. Dean looked you, wondering why you were staring at the laptop screen with a bit of a confused expression. “Uh, this first mate. Mr I.P. Freeley.”

"Well, that's not suspicious. You got a picture of old Freeley?" Dean asked. You scrolled through the website where you found a grainy black and white picture of the crew. Clicking on it, you pulled up a bigger version, and of the man dubbed a hero. Who you saw made your face drop in slight twinge of annoyance. Dean headed over as Sam leaned over the table to get a good look himself. It didn't take long for Sam to have the same reaction as you did. All Dean needed to do was take a quick glance to realize why the man looked so familiar. He let out a frustrated sigh. "Balthazar."

You didn’t have a very good friendship with Balthazar. He had a knack for elaborate, over the top schemes you and the boys always seemed to get in the middle of. You weren't the least bit surprised to see that he had landed himself in more trouble. His choices and bad plans to only benefit him were inconvenient and annoying, but this...whatever sort of trick was up his sleeve, it was causing the lives of too many people. You and the boys decided to have a friendly chat with him. However, in order to get into contact with angel, praying wasn’t a valid option for you. So you chose to summon him.

The process wasn’t an easy one. You shut the curtains to give the three of you privacy while the boys moved the table across the room to give all of you more room. You removed the laptops from the table so Sam could place down a bowl full of all sorts of ingredients after Dean drew a few familiar sigils in chalk. To add the final touch, you lit a match against the box before throwing it into the bowl, watching as the flame ignited before dying down. You looked around the room to see that things were working when you noticed the lights began to flicker, a few bulbs even burst from what was about to happen.

“Boys, boys, boys. And the lovely, always delightful Y/N.” Balthazar’s familiar accent filled the room, signaling his arrival. You turned around to see the angel himself. Your lips stretched into a frown. “Whatever can I do for you?”

“We need to talk.” You informed the angel.

"Oh," Balthazar mumbled. He took notice of your body language, crossed arms over your chest and annoyed glare, to realize you summoned him on not so good terms. "You seem upset, Y/N."

“I kind of am. You see, the boys and I are working this case. And you know whose face I come across while doing research for this case?” You asked him. Before Balthazar could try and give a sarcastic answer, you tell him. “Yours! What the hell is with the boat, Balthazar.”

“What boat are you possibly referring to, darling? I’ve been around for a very long time. Seen a lot of boats.” Balthazar said. You narrowed your eyes on him in annoyance at his response. “Be more specific, that’s all I’m asking.”

“The Titanic.” You told him in a sharp tone. “Ring any bells?”

“Oh. Ja. The Titanic. Yes, well, uh, it was meant to sink, and I saved it.” Balthazar explained to all of you. His voice was all too casual, acting as if he was talking about the weather. You raised your brow slightly from what you just heard and asked him what he meant by that. “Well it was meant to bash into this iceberg thing and plunge into the briny deep with all this hoopla, and I saved it. Anything else I can answer for you?”

“Why?” Sam asked the angel.

Balthazar looked at the younger Winchester with a bit of a confused expression by his question, “Why what?”

“Why did you un-sink the ship?” Dean asked again more clearly this time, and a little bit slower. Due to the fact that he was trying to keep his patience.

“Oh, because I hated the movie.” Balthazar said.

Your face scrunched up slightly, “What movie?”

Balthazar let out a laugh, “Exactly.”  

“Wait, so you saved a cruise liner because—“ Sam said, trying to wrap his head around what he was hearing.

“Because that God-awful Celine Dion song made me want to smite myself.” Balthazar said. You and the boys grew confused at the name the angel mentioned. “Before you waste your time asking, she’s not important. Thanks to my wonderful plan she's a destitute lounge singer somewhere in Quebec, and let's keep it that way, please.”

"Okay, I didn't think that was possible." Sam said. "I thought you couldn't change history."

"Oh, haven't you noticed? There's no more rules, boys." Balthazar said. The angel grew a smirk at his plan that he thought was oh, so brilliant. Only it was causing all sorts of problems. But you highly doubted Balthazar thought that far ahead to get whatever he wanted.

"Wow. The nerve on you." Sam mumbled. He slowly shook his head and scoffed at what he was hearing from the angel. "So you just, what, un-sunk a giant boat?"

"Oh come on. I saved people.” Balthazar defended himself against the younger Winchester and his judgemental glare. “I thought you loved that kind of thing."

"Yeah, but now those people and their kids and their kids' kids, they must have interacted with so many other people, changed so much crap. You totally Butterfly-Affected history!" Sam said. He pointed out the big, glaring flaw Balthazar refused to think about to get his own way.

"Dude. Dude." Dean mumbled, getting his brother's attention. You rolled your eyes from what he felt the need to bring up at a time like this. "Rule one, no Kutcher references."

"Ah, yes. Unfortunately, there's still an Ashton Kutcher. And you still averted the Apocalypse, and there are still Archangels. But, thanks to me, I made it a bit harder for them to do it. It’s just the small details that are different, like you don't drive an Impala.” Balthazar said. Your face scrunched up slightly at the mention of a car you don’t think you’ve ever heard of. The angel spoke up quickly, not feeling the need to waste time on unimportant knowledge. “Yes, yes. ‘What's an Impala?’ Trust me, it's not important. You see, Y/N wasn’t supposed to be raised by Bobby. Along with the fact that Ellen and Jo aren’t supposed to be alive.”

"Wait, what?" You asked the angel, suddenly becoming way too confused at what was going on here to keep up with what he was explaining. Balthazar walked over to the small kitchen area where he spotted a bottle of unopened whiskey. He took it upon himself to pour himself a drink

while you thought more about what he said. "What do you mean?”

“You see, your darling mother—Ella, right? She was supposed to end up with a different man that you think is your real father, who died when you were six. A whole bunch of nonsense. Basically you’re supposed to be a half demon. The apocalypse was supposed to go a

other way. A bunch of things.” Balthazar said. He twisted off the top to the whiskey and poured a drink while he explained. “Luckily I tipped off a cherub to point his magic arrow somewhere else so you could be raised by Bobby, who you always went on about being your ‘real’ father. And, of course there was that whole ordeal with Ellen and Jo.”

“What?” You mumbled, your voice suddenly growing eerily quiet.

"Ella wasn't supposed to have died when you were a kid and by that hound. She was supposed to sell her soul, sell her husband's soul and all that jazz. Ellen and Jo are supposed to be dead.” Balthazar said. “You see, I save a boat, those peoples' kids have kids, your mother falls in love with someone else, one thing leads to another, which leads to another thousand things, and yada, yada, yada. To cut a long story short, they don't die in a massive explosion and you three get to grow up together. Let's agree I did a good thing. One less Billy Zane movie and I saved two of your closest friends.”

You weren't sure what the hell was going on anymore. Your way into this world and upbringing wasn't a usual one. You learned when you were in your early twenties that your mother made a deal with Azazel, a yellow eyed demon responsible for the tragedy in your life, to have a child after she couldn't get pregnant. Deals only brought ten years. Your mother thought she could try and outrun a hellhound. You remembered on your tenth birthday you were in the process of moving, somewhere far away. It had been just the two of you since your father was killed in a car accident when you were six years old. She just wanted a normal life.

But your mother’s idea of a perfect life was cut short when she was ripped apart by a hellhound. And you heard it all. All you remembered about the tragedy was locking yourself in a closet, petrified you would mauled by a beast you could hear, but couldn’t see. John Winchester and Bobby found you a few days after your mother died. While John had his hands full with his own two sons, Bobby couldn't stomach the idea of letting you out of his sight, so he took you in. He'd been your father figure ever since then. You didn't know what you'd do without him, but hearing all of this from Balthazar, about how things were supposed to be different, the room felt like it was spinning.

"But now somebody is killing the descendants of the survivors." Sam said, his voice bringing you back into the situation right in front of you. Balthazar raised his brow, wondering why he should care about such a thing. "And that's maybe, like, fifty thousand people."

Balthazar continued to stare at the three of you with a blank expression, “And?”

“And we need to save as many people as we can, but we need to know who's after them.” The older Winchester explained the situation a bit more clearly for Balthazar to understand without really having to think about the mess he just made.

“Oh, uh, sorry, uh. You have me confused with the other angel—you know, the one in the dirty trench coat who's in love with you. I...don't care.” Balthazar spoke the last three words rather slowly, making sure you and the boys would get the message so you wouldn’t bug him again. You scoffed as he took a long sip of his drink to finish it up. “Goodbye, boys. And it’s been a pleasure, Y/N.”

"Whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait." Dean said, trying to get the angel to stay for a few more minutes. He stepped forward in an attempt to try and stop Balthazar, but when you blinked, the angel vanished from your sight, leaving you to clean up the mess he made. "Son of a bitch!"

+ + +

After you were left high and dry by Balthazar, you and the boys tried to figure out the extent of the consequences you were left to deal with by the angel after he unsank a boat for the sake of keeping a movie from being made and a lounge singer from seeking fame. The most troubling fact you had to break to Bobby was about Ellen and Jo and their...different path. You knew it was going to break his heart to hear the news. You tried to postpone it far as you could while you explained the situation to the older hunter on speaker phone.

"So, Balthazar un-sank a boat, and now we got a boatload of people who should never have been born." Bobby said, recapping the information you and the boys told him over the past few minutes.

"Yeah. Like fifty-thousand." Sam said, giving the haunting number of people you were supposed to try and save. The older hunter's response wasn't what you were anticipating. He seemed casual, saying that all of this made sense. "How does any of this make sense?”

“Because I got an idea who we're up against. Fate." Bobby said. Fate was a word that meant everything happens for a reason, why your life ended the way it did was because that's how the reality of things were written out. You always thought of the word as a concept, something someone higher up chose, like God himself. It turned out fate might not be a concept, more of a person in charge of how things turned out.. "I mean Fate, like the Fates. Or one of 'em, at least."

“You mean like Greek mythology?” You wondered. “Like the sisters?”

You could thank all of your knowledge about the things that went bump in the night on Bobby. He taught you everything you needed to know. And you spent most of your time reading the dusty books cluttered all over his house. What else was a girl to do? Dean's mumbled remark of calling you a nerd didn't go unnoticed. You gave him a look as you lightly kicked him in the shin.

“These ladies are responsible for how you go down, literally. So if you get creamed by a garage door or crunched by a copy machine, they're the ones who hammer out the details of how you die. Spin out your fate on a piece of pure gold." Bobby explained to all of you. You realized the gold thread found at each scene of where the victims had died was for a reason. It made sense from what Bobby was saying. "And then one of 'em writes it all down in her Day Runner of Death. It's high-level stuff. Anyway—fits. Now we know what Balthazar did. It seems to me that maybe Fate is just trying to clean up the mess."

Sam asked the question on everyone’s mind, "So, how do we stop it?"

“How do we stop Fate? Good question.” Bobby said.

"Well, there's got to be a way." Dean said, thinking there had to be a loophole of some sort.

“Or there ain't. I mean, this is Fate we're talking about here. You know, the easiest way would be to get that angel to re-sink the boat.” Bobby said. You found yourself shooting down the idea in a heartbeat before he could try and suggest it again. “Big difference between dying awful and never being born, Y/N.”

“We are not sinking the boat, Bobby. Okay?" You told him in a tone of voice that you didn’t want to hear anymore of this. You never spoke to Bobby like this. But you didn’t want to change the way things were, the way you grew up to think that this was how it was meant to be. You knew things were more complicated than you could handle, but you’d deal with it. “Don't even think about it."

"Well, okay. What's got you biting my head off? Normally you're all about doing the right thing." Bobby said. You let out a quiet sigh as you found your gaze lingering over to the boys, as if you were hoping for some guidance on what to say next. Bt they looked overwhelmed themselves at what the right thing to do was. So, you told the man that it was nothing. Bobby didn't believe your excuse. "Try that again?"

"Look, it doesn't even really matter, but..." Dean decided to spare you from breaking the bad news when he spoke up, however he found himself growing silent for a moment, not wanting to tell the man the bitter truth. But, he forced himself to. "Apparently, a crapload of dominoes get tipped over if the Titanic goes down. And, uh, bottom line—Ellen and Jo die.”

The other line suddenly went quiet when Dean told the older hunter the news. You bit the inside of your cheek as you imagined what must have been going through his mind right now. Bobby and Ellen had been married for over a year now, since the apocalypse wrapped up. Both of them were head over heels in love with each other. Ellen was like a mother you never had, and Bobby was a father figure to you since you were little. The thought of things being different made you feel uneasy. When Bobby spoke up a few moments later, his response to the information wasn’t the least bit surprising.

"Okay, you three. Listen up." Bobby spoke up, his voice dead serious. "You make sure... Keep those angels from sinking that boat. Do you understand me?”

You and the boys agreed with the plan. You ended the call on that note, only you found yourself feeling more overwhelmed at what you were ahead of. Along with the fact that you had no clue how the hell to fix any of this. You tossed the phone to the bed and let out a loud sigh.

"He's bad enough without her." You mumbled. "Think how he'd be if she was gone."

"Yeah." Sam sighed, knowing the situation ahead of you was going to be a moral dilemma. "So, what do we do? I mean, how do we save fifty-thousand people?"

“I got no freaking clue.” Dean said.

“We don't even know who they are.” Sam added more details you didn’t want to think about.

You were about to let out another sigh from the trouble ahead of you as you turned your head slightly in the direction of the nightstand. You noticed something sitting on the ledge, leaning forward, you realized it was the pamphlet Dean grabbed from the office of one Sean Russo. A dick in a shiny suit—who might be the next victim of Fate. And your only possible lead in stopping this situation before it could get any worse than it already was.

+ + +

The next morning you and the boys decided to stake out Russo's office to catch him off guard this time. You called his secretary, posing as a potential client, asking when he'd be available, big surprise to hear that he was all booked with appointments. You watched from the backseat window as car passed by every so often, blocking your view of the front door to the office. It was a little over an hour of waiting before you spotted Russo. He was making his way out with a client from the looks of it, who looked in terrible shape from the neck brace and cane he had to use while walking. You scoffed at how Russo acted. He just radidated bad vibes.

You and the boys got out from the car to tail Russo in attempt to get his attention. While you and the boys called out the man’s name to get his attention, the man was at least twenty feet ahead of you, too wrapped up in his phone conversation that he took to acknowledge either one of you.

"I don't care. Send him a fruitcake." Russo said to the person on the other line. You tried to get the man's attention when you called out his name a little louder, but he continued to chat into his phone, getting closer to the end of the sidewalk to cross the street. You had a feeling he was too wrapped up in his conversation to look both ways. "Who's the judge? Ah, no. 20 bucks. Believe me, this guy—he owes me."

“Russo, stop!”

You took no chances when you called out his name on the top of your lungs. While you did get his attention, it was at the possibly worst time. You looked to see that there was a van speeding down the road, showing no signs of breaking for pedestrians. Before Russo could become roadkill, Dean lunged forward, saving the day by grabbing ahold of the man and roughly shoving him to the sidewalk, getting him out of the way. Russo went tumbling to the ground as his cell phone bounced a foot or so away.

The driver slammed on his breaks, exactly where Russo was just standing a few moments ago. If none of you had acted when you did, Russo would have been good as dead. But it seemed the man wasn't feeling gratitude for your act of heroism.

"Get off of me." Russo ordered, pushing away Sam's awaiting hand to help the man back up on his feet. You gave Russo a dirty look when he snatched his phone away from your grip after you generously picked it up for him. "And you—I told you and your creepy friend to leave me alone, didn't I?”

"Look, we're just trying to help you out, okay?" You said, Russo scoffed at your excuse.

“Help me?! You almost killed me, you lunatic. Unbelievable." Russo grumbled underneath his breath. You gave him a dirty look at how he was acting as he began attempting to walk across the street now that it was clear of any cars. Dean tried to get the man's attention, causing Russo to stop in the middle of the street. "Just be glad I'm not suing your a—!"

Russo would never be able to finish his passive threat, and those would the last words he would ever get the chance to say. Things turned for the worst at what happened next. Nobody saw it coming. A bus came hurtling down the street, going too fast to stop for the idiot that stepped into the road and didn’t move when the bus was approaching. You and the boys stood there in silence, eyes wide and mouths parted open, wondering what the hell you just witnessed.

[Next Part]

Rewrite Taglist:

@deansquirreljerkwinchester @lotsofspnshitposts @everything-i-tried-was-taken @starswirlblitz @albot-e @supernaturalismydrug @we-are-band-sexuals @angiewinchestercas @kaylinfayezink @owhatshername1@kgbrenner @kartuziprincessofhorrors @cleo-is-my-doggy @eeyore1988@dakota-dream  @lilylovelyxo@timetravelingginger @flaurityxoxokokooxox @holahellohialoha  @quicksilver123456  @natashacamillaus @nadanidea @falloutofmymemez @lexi-anastasia @kaylinfayezink @deanwnchstr @albot-eh @yelloweyedwriter @rashinyx2002 @e-quanimity @shellybeans @icantfindacreativeurl @becs-bunker @oreosatmidnight @bands-and-shietz  @fabulousmustachesonapolarbear @clarewinchester

(Message me if you would like to be added!)

[elizabethrobertajones]

Dean & Cas Are In Love

A hopefully one day conclusive study of these assholes, hopefully told as briefly as I can.

Written for the people in the fandom who care but sometimes need a pick me up on this, and not written to prove a point to anyone who doesn't already care. <3

Ah yes, the good old crack episode which actually has the entire plot embedded in it and is of critical importance to the season.

When Cas shows up and does his display of power which intimidates Raphael, Dean looks just as shocked and, well, concerned as Raphael does to be threatened (we don't get a Sam reaction shot, just Dean in the middle of 2 shots of Cas being a flashy BAMF). I don't think the weather is a total coincidence either, to throw back to the time they confronted Raphael together a couple of years before, and while Cas was playing tough, Raphael was intimidating as heck and Dean knew they were lucky to escape that one. After all, it prompted the first "last night on earth" comment. The connection is not a good reflection on where Cas is right now.

When they return to Bobby's and Dean is trying to complain to Cas about Balthazar, Cas says that while it was his plan, Cas would do the same thing, prompting that annoyed response from Dean. They were very nearly stranded in a terrifying AU, and that's if they didn't get killed there. Gambling on their lives and their luck at surviving various nonsenses is not a great way to treat your friends, you know? Cas's comment is the first sign that something is truly wrong, and that Cas's morality is in danger because of the war.

This whole section from the moment they get back to the regular SPN!verse is the "real" episode, the reason for it all, the power play that on the scripts they're waving around in the AU is played out in their regular locations, but perhaps with a more grisly end, given Cas's intervention in the story and taking them off-script.

Cas has been enjoying a sort of safe respite in the story free from suspicion, or from the implication that the angel war is entirely sketchy or that his role in it is entirely terrifying and damaging to his character. Over the next few episodes he'll be consistently undermined in trustworthiness by various things, from framing to his dialogue, his behaviour, to the mysterious accusations lobbed at him, showing us that something serious is up and he's in the centre of it, but this is where the turn comes.

And it ends with Dean saying "friggin angels", reducing Cas back down to his species and his behaviour as generic angel nonsense, drawing a line to show that the angel war has affected how Cas is behaving to the point of isolating and de-humanising him and Dean is basically showing that he's become unfamiliar, and by refusing to open up, playing games with them, and leaving instead of explaining, they're right back to square one, except that now it feels like Cas is the one playing all the angel games.

I didn't crop the "when will I be able to make you understand" gif any closer to Cas to catch his expression because I rather wanted to frame him as the episode does, with that jar of blood right by him, which isn't ominous at all for the end of the season and the rather more plot-critical jar of blood (also used to open a door between worlds).

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

Things about 13x08 “The Scorpion and the Frog”

Alright, since I am awfully late with watching the episode and I don’t think anyone really needs a ton of my rambles on my live watch, I figured - also since I didn’t find much noteworthy to meta or talk about while watching - I’d just make one bigger “impression” post on the episode.

Overall, I have to say - while this wasn’t one of the best episodes ever written - I did not mind the episode. I can’t say I adored it or liked it massively, but I certainly didn’t dislike it as I did with the previous two. I actually found the episode entertaining somewhat. The pacing was alright and I did enjoy the characters introduced in the episode - even though they felt too close to certain other beloved already deceased characters, which kind of left a bad aftertaste imo. In general though and despite it’s silliness, I think the episode worked as a true one off and filler (and I usually tend to say fillers don’t exist, but with this one to me it truly felt like filler - and yes, despite the fact some of the big themes were worked into the episode - but I’ll go into that in a bit).

Alright, here are some aspects I feel like commenting on a bit more.

First of all there is the title - one I think worked pretty well in relation to the context of the episode, because the fable the title is inspired by, I suppose, is explored directly within the episode by the characters and all their “deal making with the natural enemy” that like Dean said right in the beginning usually never works out for them. And of course we saw that ending up being the case with Alice (though in the end she was freed), but most of all Barthamus (who I did enjoy - he was kind of cross between Balthazar and Crowley to me - though tbh seeing him just made me miss Crowley so much more than anything else) and Luthor Shrike as well. More than how the title related to the episode’s arc however it is important to see it in relation to the overarching theme of the season of “nature vs. nurture” especially considering it was the lead up episode to the mid season finale which features Jack heavily, who is the main character through with the whole “fighting against your ~nature”-theme is explored by. If the fable is anything to go by and it’s dark moral then it would allude to Jack going dark side (even though he has been taught and socialized differently) as this is simply part of his “nature” as Lucifer’s son. In this regard it feels also noteworthy that Aesop (which Dean has read) wrote a similar tale about a “Farmer and a viper” where a farmer finds a snake freezing to death and takes pity on it and warms it in his coat - revitalized by that the snake ends up biting the farmer and kills him), which feels even more fitting in relation to SPN lore and how Lucifer is seen as the “serpent”.

Then there is the whole talk on Solomon and him keeping tabs on the Queen of Sheba, which reminded me that earlier this season we had a scene featuring the “Song of Solomon”, which makes interesting, if Solomon ends up popping up a third time this season I’‘d call it a pattern and it’s probably interesing to di into all of that history a bit further.

As for the episode’s characters. I actually liked Grab, he was a kind of “one off”-demon - he wasn’t plain stupid or over the top cringeworthy evil like demons (and angels as well tbh) have been portrayed a lot on SPN the past seasons. I wouldn’t have needed to see him again as a character, but he was enjoyable for the time of the episode. I also liked Barthamus and how the actor played him, but in general to me just no one can in any way replace Mark Sheppard and Crowley so that’s that. And lastly there’s Alice. She was alright (the actress did an okay job), though tbh, to me she felt too much like a clichè and too much like Charlie 3.0 (seriously, they even had to give her a line featuring “Charlie”? Sorry, but… meeeh, I’m not a fan). Hell, they even sent her off with a bus scene and her showing the “victory”-sign. I mean…. how much more blatant can you be?

Now let’s move on to Luthor Shrike. I personally felt reminded of Magnus/Cuthbert Sinclair a bit with his collection of artifacts and such (forever disappointed they never picked Magnus as a big bad, that guy would have worked as that imo). Especially as he was described as “doing anything and everything to add to his collection”. Tbh though I did find him a bit stupid tbh. I fully believe he has his entrance video trapped (he just seemed like that kind of guy) so he must have seen Sam walking in an out of the devil’s trap and then when he hands Sam a shot of gin he hadn’t mixed holy water into that to test him? Seriously? That just seems to me awfully stupid for a 200 year old immortal being. Which brings me to the other character I had to think of aside from Magnus with how he lived secludedly: Cain. Like Cain, Luthor also seems to have drawn away from socitey after losing a loved one. And yes, of course the parallel to John giving his life for Dean and Dean then later dying was prettyy apparent, but I suppose it was alos meant as a possible moment of foreshadowing for Lucifer and Jack’s story. Will Lucifer in the end maybe sacrifice himself to save his son? While I really don’t need or want a Lucifer redemption arc, I’d take it if that meant we’d finally be rid of that character lol. In visuals also to me Luthor was aligned with Cain who was also immortal and got stabbed by the demon killing knife and then later died like Magnus by beheading.

And last but not least on to the Winchesters. I have to admit if Jensen wasn’t as good as an actor as he is the “compass hand thing” as well as the “paw thing” would not have worked. They were silly yes and once more Dean was used as comic relief, but Jensen delivered it. So I didn’t mind those a lot. What made me a bit moody was when the “Nerve damage”-scene rolled around, because it captured so much with nothing much said, but only “I lived off of that stuff when I was a kid, What is it like 10 times the legal amount of caffeine?”. Yeah, nice callback there to how Dean never was a child from 4 onwards and literally ran on coffeine to make it through. Like… how is that not yet another example of how friggin awful Dean’s life was and how much he had to shoulder at a way too young age? Aside from that I found it rather interesting that Grab called Dean a “hand puppet” - of course that as due to the spell he had cast on him, but I can’t help but rather think of that comment in a much broader sense with Dean as a vessel - yes, I am still stupidly hoping that someday Dean as Michael’s vessel will be rendered of import by the narrative again. Silly me…

And now truly lastly, the ending scene with the burning of Bart’s bones and the spell and how slow the Winchesters were there and how Bart just stands watching in slow mo almost when Alice patiently picks up the lighter after he just said he is sooooo quick was just… eye roll worthy imo. Also, lol, Bart saying Sam is the smart one? Apparently not when it comes to keep something from burning. ;P I mean, come on Sam, you blew on that? Really??? Bahaha.

Anyway… So yeah, that’s kind of all I have to say. Not much stuff for meta, but a few very pretty eye candy moments, so maybe I’ll try some editing. Anyway overall verdict: Alrightish irrelevant episode. Score: 6 out of 10.

[ourloveisforthelovely]

Things Forbidden 7

Warnings: no smut, drama, fights

Link to Chapter 6

Words: 2, 760

_____________________________

After Gabriel stormed out of the room everyone sat in dead silence. Luna sighed sitting down against on the dusty old couch. Lucifer meanwhile, was looking at everyone in his room with a smile.

“So are we going to draw straws to see who is going to talk to him? Personally I don’t want to draw straws with you people.”

Dean looked up.

“Well there is the door Satan.”

Lucifer looked highly offended.

“You think I am going to go off and leave my little brother when hes all offended and upset?”

Sam rolled his eyes.

“Didn’t bother you too badly when you stabbed him.”

Luna groaned as she stood up and walked into the kitchen away from everyone. Standing by the sink she looked into the busy city street. Luna knew that there had to be some kind of spell on the house preventing people from seeing they were living there.

“Are you okay?”

Luna turned to see Zoe standing in the doorway looking worried. She nodded, trying to hide any clue that she was close to tears.

“Yeah….no.”

She said finally. Zoe walked closer to her god daughter before motioning to the table.

“Sit down dear.”

Luna did what she was told before sitting down while Zoe started moving around the kitchen to make a cup of tea.

“Zoe you don’t have to make me tea.”

Zoe didn’t look at Luna as she snapped her fingers making the old gas range come on as if it had just came from the appliance store.

“Nonsense. You’re upset. You need tea.”

Luna didn’t argue further. This was what Zoe did. Whenever Luna was upset with something Zoe was all about fixing tea.

Zoe turned looking at Luna as she twirled a strand of blond hair around her finger.

“You’re looking well.”

Zoe said casually. Luna looked up.

“Yeah, I’m good. Well I was up until now. Now isn’t too grand.”

Zoe sat down at the table.

“It seems Gabriel is taking good care of you.”

If Luna wasn’t so internally miserable she would have been pleased to see that her god mother was trying. Zoe smiled sadly. She didn’t like seeing the worry in the girl’s eyes.

“Luna I don’t want you going out there to face Raphael alone. You had a very good plan and point but I don’t want it to be you”

Luna rolled her eyes.

“Aunty, you of all people know it is going to have to be me that gets him where we need him. Raphael isn’t going to come out for you all. He won’t come out for Gabriel or Lucifer either. I can do this. I just wish you would understand that.”

“Gabriel showed you how to do that?”

Luna nodded.

“I can do a lot more things. I wish you would have some faith in me.”

Zoe reached out squeezing her hands.

“I’m trying. I really am. So what all have you been up to since you have been away. I want to know everything but the details of your love life. Somethings are better left unsaid.”

Luna chuckled at the grossed out expression on Zoe’s face.

“We’ve been visiting a lot of places. Places that I have wanted to go since I was a kid. We’ve been to Paris, Italy, Australia, and a lot more. By the way Koala’s are not as cuddly in person.”

Zoe chuckled at that.

“Sounds like Gabe is treating you like a princess. Please tell him that I call him Gabe too. I love to see that expression on his face when someone calls him that.”

Luna stood, kissing the top of Zoe’s head.

“He does and I’ll let you call him that yourself. Speaking of Gabriel, I better go talk to him. Angry archangel isn’t near as fun as happy trickster.”

Zoe shrugged.

“The people he is tricking may not agree.”

Luna smiled walking upstairs to the bedroom that she and Gabriel was sharing. He stood, just like she expected, starring out the window with a frown on his face that reminded her too much of Lucifer.

“Can we talk?”

She asked softly. Gabriel’ golden eyes drifted in her direction but he didn’t smile like he typically did when he saw her.

“If it’s about you using yourself as bait for my brother the answer is still no. If it is something other then that I am open to the conversation.”

Luna sighed.

“Gabriel, you know this idea will work. I’ve already said you can be there. You won’t be far away and could intervene in an instant. I know you don’t want to kill your brother…I get that.”

Gabriel held his hand up.

“Screw Raphael! I’ll kill him dead.”

Luna tiled her head to the side reminding Gabriel of Cas.

“Then what is the problem?”

Gabriel rolled his eyes,

“You’re safety is the problem Luna. I don’t care if I am standing there holding your hand. I don’t want you near Raphael.”

Luna shook her head beginning to get annoyed.

“Then what are we going to do? We are just wasting time sitting here. The more time we waste the closer we are getting to that vision that Luci showed Sam and Dean about what could happen in the future. You’re going to go evil just like Raphael.”

Gabriel froze before muttering shit under his breath. He turned walking to Luna pulling her into his arms.

“How did you find out about that?”

Luna pulled away ignoring the look of hurt in her lover’s golden eyes.

“I’ve known about it for years. Luci showed me too. Obviously there will be some differences with my mother being dead but I don’t want to see you go that way Gabriel.”

Gabriel made a mental note to talk to Dean and Cas about everything they told Luna then to have a word with his older brother. This wasn’t something that he really wanted her to know.

“Luna, that was just a vision. That doesn’t mean it will have. You know the future is subjective. Besides I have no friggin interest in joining up with Raphael. Do you realize how boring that would be? His walls have to yawn. Luna we will take care of Raphael. You don’t have anything to worry about. In the mean time I want you to promise me that you won’t go looking for him.”

Luna nodded, feeling a little better.

“I promise.”

Gabriel looked relived at that as he pulled Luna back into his arm.

“Goodie. Now I can stop being so damn serious!”

3 months later….

Things did go smoothly for a small amount of time. Sam and Dean went back to hunting and was gone from time to time. Zoe, Cas, and Gabriel had gone off on a lead to Raphael’s latest catastrophe leaving Luna alone. She would see her family when someone would pop in to check on her. That was about it. After being alone for a month things started to get old fast.  

The day her birthday rolled around Luna was even more annoyed than ever. Dean had called to wish her a happy birthday with the reminder of,

“Stay home. We’ll do something special when we all get home. Don’t go anywhere with Balthazar and if he bring up the Titanic tell him to shut up.”

Zoe and Cas had checked in by angel radio to say a quick I love you and happy birthday but nothing from Gabriel. At first Luna felt like she was being a spoiled brat for feeling so miserable. Her family was out risking their lives to make sure a threat that was affecting her greatly never laid a hand on her yet here she was moody because she was alone on her birthday. Shouldn’t she just sit down and watch a movie or something?

Around 8 pm, Luna received a call from the only friend that she really had outside of the family. Cami was one of the few humans that she had gotten used to. Luna met Cami when they were in middle school and Zoe was forcing her into taking piano lessons. Zoe and Cas were at first wary of her getting so used to a human who would have no understanding of how their family worked. It was Dean that convinced them that she did need some human contact outside of their little “family.” Cas only agreed to it as long as Cami’s memory could be modified into thinking they were just a normal family with no weirdness what so ever.

“Luna, I am home from college. We should totally go out for your birthday!”

Luna, at first, declined stating that she needed to stay home and study but eventually Cami’s begging got the best of her.

“Ok, fine. Zoe, Cas, and Dean are out of town for work. That definitely beats sitting home alone on my birthday.”

Cami eagerly agreed.

“Of course! Your sister works too much anyway!”

Luna smirked when she called Zoe her “sister.” That was the main story that she had agreed to use when Zoe, Cas, and Dean sat her down regarding her blooming friendship with the girl.  

“Yeah, she does. Well where are we going anyway?”

Cami was quiet a moment before squealing.

“They have a new bar downtown? Wanna meet me there in half an hour?”

Luna knew that this was a bad decision. She knew that Gabriel would be angry but he didn’t know what was going on. He hadn’t checked in for a few days so what he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him. As far as Cas and Zoe, if she just kept quiet on angel radio they wouldn’t know anything out of the ordinary was up.

Arriving at the bar, Luna looked around for Cami. She took extra care to make sure that she looked as human as possible. Living as an angel for the past few months had worn on her and now she would have to take care to act as human as possible. She could already hear Cas in her head.

“You have to be an angel or a human. Jumping back and forth is too risky. You can’t be both.”

“Luna!”

Her thoughts were interrupted when Cami came running to her.

“Cami!”

She squealed, again trying to be as much to her old herself as possible. Cami quickly wrapped her arms around Luna squeezing her into a tight hug.

“Look at you birthday girl! You look so pretty! How is your birthday?”

Luna took a breath before deciding to put all the issues in her life on hold and just enjoy the night.

Meanwhile back at home,

“Luna!! We are home! Surprise! You better like chocolate cake because Cas and I argued over it for 20 minutes!”

Zoe said, shooting her boyfriend a look. Cas shrugged incorrectly.

“This house is awfully quiet.”

Cas stated as he walked into the living room where the TV was paused on some show about honey bees. He internally smiled. Luna was definitely his child.

“Cas! She isn’t here!”

Zoe yelled from the kitchen. Cas quickly walked into the room looking at Zoe who was looking panicked. He closed his eyes trying to tap in on Luna’s location. Zoe meanwhile, was pacing doing the same thing.

“I am getting a lot of awful music.”

Cas stated as he rubbed his temples. Zoe froze in the middle of the kitchen when she found Luna’s lap top with the address to the bar still pulled up.

“Cas she is with Cami at some bar.”

Cas nodded.

“That explains the awful music.”

Zoe rolled her eyes.

“Yeah it does Mr. Homebody. Come on we have to get going.”

Cas titled his head.

“Should we tell Gabriel?”

Zoe sighed.

“Ugh yeah. Get a hold of him.”

Seconds later Zoe and Cas stood in the middle of the smokey bar. Cas winced at the loud music and horribly dressed people around him.

“What the hell is going on?”

Both Zoe and Cas turned to see Gabriel standing behind them looking ready to smite the world. Zoe shrugged.

“I thought you were supposed to be with her. It is her birthday and you are her boyfriend.”

Gabriel rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, I was ON a job! I told you what I was doing. Lucifer and I were onto something but here I am.”

Cas shook his head holding his hand up.

“This isn’t the time to argue…We need to find Luna.”

Zoe started looking around until she saw Cami at the bar. She motioned to Cas before walking over.

“Cami”

Zoe said the girl’s name as calmly as possible. Cami’s eyes widened when she turned seeing Cas and Zoe.

“Uh hi everybody”

She said as friendly as possible. From the look on Cas and Zoe’s face she knew that they were mad or panicked one. Why was another story. Cas quickly stepped forward.

“Where is Luna?”

Cami looked around the room.

“She was right over there talking to some dude.”

Gabriel’s frown, went if possible even angrier. If the situation was not so serious Zoe would have totally loved this moment.

“What dude?”

Zoe asked, making sure that Cami heard the urgency in her voice. Cami blinked nervously.

“Some guy with dark hair and eyes. I don’t know him. Oh god why was I born?”

Both Zoe and Cas exchanged looks knowing that they were overwhelming the poor girl. Cami never was one to do well with pressure.

“Cami it is fine. We just need to know where Luna is.”

Cas said gently. Gabriel meanwhile, turned stalking off done with the argument in front of him.

Luna, meanwhile, stood across the room totally not even noticing her family in the room. After drinking numerous shots of vodka she was finally beginning to feel something. The guy that had been chatting her up was yapping on and on about his job as a photographer. Luna nodded casually nodding her head.

“So does Gabriel know that you are here?”

Luna froze. Did that guy really just say that? His dark eyes watched her with a mirthful smile.

“You heard me correctly.”

He said with a cold voice. Luna looked up as the man turned into none other than Raphael. Holding back a scream, Luna swallowed as she looked around for Cami.

“Don’t worry. I’m not here to hurt your little human friend. I’m here for you.”

Luna frowned.

“Well today isn’t your day big boy. Tomorrow isn’t looking so good either. Why don’t you be a good boy and go kill yourself. You know what is going to happen to you.”

Raphael rolled his eyes.

“Come now child. Do you think that your little family is going to get one on me? I don’t think so.”

Luna, feeling her anger beginning to boil, was trying to hold herself from speaking any further.

“I’m going to kill you Luna. Just like I did your stupid mother after that I’m going to kill Zoe. You have all caused me nothing but problems.”

Upon hearing her mother’s name being said lunged at Raphael. Whether it be the shock of Luna doing something so stupid or the fact he was honestly shocked Raphael was caught of guard when she landed a punch right in his mouth. Raphael got to his feet quickly before reaching out and grabbing Luna by the throat.

“You like to feel powerful? Well let me show you powerful.”

His hand tightened on her throat.

“I can kill you with my bare hands and I plan to. I will take joy in watching the light leave your eyes.”

Luna swallowed doing what could to kick at the archangel. Gabriel was right. She wasn’t powerful enough to take this giant fucker down by herself.

“Let. Me. Go”

Luna chocked out as the world went black….

________

@tas898

@greenappleeyes

@jannalionheart

@sherala007

[ismickdaviesbackfromthedeadyet]

Supernatural Survey

So, I got tagged by @srj1990​ who reblogs most of my updates with sad or angry gifs. They also writes fanfiction (I’ve read some of their stuff it’s some  g u d  s h i t). Check them out if you like to read.

Onto questions.

1. What season did you start watching Supernatural?

Awe shit. I want to say during the 11th season and binged it alone so I was caught up for the season 11 release to Netflix. I only stumbled upon the fandom after seeing the episode where Dean was driving that beat up mini-van and said he looked like a soccer mom or something. I looked it up cause I wanted it on a tee-shirt. Ended up falling into the hole that is the fandom.

Never go that tee-shirt tho.

2. Who was the first character you fell in love with?

Prolly Dean.

3. Who was a character that you hated at first but grew to love?

Meg, but then I also feel like I want to say (please don’t attack me) Metatron. It’s all very hazy, but I do vaguely remember hating both of them at least a little and then not hating them.

Yeah, very hazy.

4. Which character would you most want to be in a long-term relationship with?

The question to ask yourself while answering this is, “Who will I not die a young death with?”

In that case, Donna. She nice. She cute. She knows how to take care of business too.

5. If you could go on just one date with one character, which one would you choose?

Fuck, that’s hard. Dean, I guess. I don’t think a lot of Dean’s dates die and he’s a pretty cool dude. I bet he could pull off a killer date (No pun intended. Hopefully.)

6. What would you do on the date?

It would either be drinking at a bar in true Winchester style or hopefully we could go driving and star gazing like a bunch of saps because I like that shit.

7. Which character would you most want to be like?

Charlie probs. She’s bad ass and has a sense of humor but still freaks out. I like to freak out sometimes. Keeps me grounded.

You can’t always know what you’re doing or what’s going on.

8. Which character would you most like to see brought back from the dead?

Idk...

(It’s Mick Davies. All day, every day, in case you couldn’t tell by the url.)

9. Which character would you most like to punch?

Alastair. I don’t know how to explain it. I just feel like he needs  good punch in the face.

10. Who is your absolute favorite character?

Dean, but Cas always has a spot in my heart.

11. Which “Big Bad” do you think was the worst?

Does the Mark of Cain count as a Big Bad, cause man did that cause some trouble. If that doesn’t count I’d probably Leviathans since they were organized and you couldn’t fucking kill them.

12. Which character are you most like?

Meg 2.0 tbh. From what I remember of her, she was a lot of sarcasm. I use a lot of sarcasm with my irl friends.

13. What death hit you the hardest? 

I think I’m supposed to say Mick because I made an entire account centered around saying that he’s not back from the dead yet.

14. What season finale hit you the hardest?

The season 10 finale. I think it was the only finale I cried during. Just, when Dean told Sam to close his eyes I was so scared and a mess.

15. What are your ten all-time favorite episodes? 

Oh, fuck... Man, I don’t even know. I think I’m due for a full re-watch of the show because every thing is so fuzzy. Maybe I’ll know after that, but The End is probably on the list somewhere along with Bad Day at Black Rock and at least one of the Ghost Facer episodes. Maybe even all of them.

16. What’s been your favorite season?

I think I liked season 3 a lot.

17. Who is your favorite angel?

Cassie boy tbh. He good. Samandriel was pretty cool while he wasn’t dead too.

18. Who’s your favorite demon?

Meg 2.0 or Crowley.

19. Who’s your favorite evil character?

Abadon was cool.

20. Do you have any Supernatural ships?

I’ll ship just abt anything tbh. Just depends on how I feel that day.

21. Who’s your favorite supporting actor?  

I think I have to go with Richard Speight Jr.

22. What’s your favorite quote from the show?

“I feel like a friggin’ soccer mom!“ - Dean 2x02

I think I’m obliged to say that, but another that I like is...

“Sammy, close your eyes,“ Dean 10x23

  23. If you could cast one famous actor in an episode of SPN, who would you chose?

Oh, man, I’m not really familiar with a lot of actors outside of SPN... But I think I’d love John Barrowman in any role on the show.

24. If you could write your own episode, what kind of creature would you like to see included?

So, I decided to actually think for once and came up with an idea for a monster that you can only see when you’re abt to fall asleep (Like, you’d fall asleep right after seeing it) and you’d see it at the end of you’re bed the first night and each night you saw it, it would get closer. When it finally would get to you... Bad stuff? Idk, just spit-balling here, but I think it’s be interesting to see the boys figure out a way to get rid of it.

25. Who’s your favorite girl that Dean’s hooked up with?

Idk, but Elka, the girl from 12x11 Regarding Dean, just kind of hit a chord with me. She also abides by what I use to define a hook up.

26. Who’s your favorite girl that Sam’s hooked up with?

Still going with my hook up rules, I guess it would have to be the hippie chick from the UFO episode. The whole thing was just so funny.

27. What are some of your favorite convention moments?

I don’t really follow the conventions all that much, but the recent Underwear Incident as I call it where Jensen showed his underwear to Misha and Misha only was so funny.

28. If you were going to guest star (or be a recurring guest star) on SPN, how would you want your character described?

Badass maybe? But then books are really cool too...

29. What do you hope to see in the next season?

Happy endings for at least a few of the monster of the week episodes. It happened a lot in the early episodes, the boys would save the day and maybe even a kiss from a girl, but slowly it just got sad and no body got to live.

I just want to have a little happiness next season.

30.-40. If you had to choose…

Bobby or John?

Bobby.

Bela or Ruby?

Mm... Bela...

Jess or Madison?

Jess.

Jo or Lisa?

Jo.

Charlie or Kevin?

I love them both, but I have to go with Charlie.

Balthazar or Ash?

I LOVE THESE TWO TOO. WHY WOULD YOU MAKE ME CHOOSE???

I guess I’ll go with Balthlazar.

Cas or Crowley?

Cassie boy.

Ben or Claire?

Awe shit...

Though, with how Claire’s shaping up rn think I’ll go with her.

Jody or Donna?

That’s tough, but since I have to choose I’ll go with Jody.

Sam or Dean?

Dean, but Sam’s a super close second.

Well, that was fun. I now have an excuse to re-watch the show (did I really need one). Now I shall tag people, but I dont really know anyone so I’ll go through my followers and see who appears the most...

@caffeine-nights

@deaths-maiden

@theawesomedashing

@firths-colins

and I don’t know if I’m allowed to do this but I’m gonna also tag @iskevintranbackfromthedeadyet since that’s where I got the inspiration for this blog.

[elizabethrobertajones]

Your post about season six, and Dean forgiving Bobby and Sam for lying to him, you only mentioned Cas in passing. Cas brought Sam back and then never bothered to tell Dean anything either, and Dean still forgives him until TMWWBK when he gives Cas an ultimatum. Can you elaborate on what you meant there?

pfft, I couldn’t even remember what I said there :P 

(this post)

I mean… I was kind of skirting around it because I don’t think Dean forgives Cas? I said 6x04 was where they reconciled and you might have noticed Cas not being in it and I was helpfully keeping that post about Sam and Bobby >.> Because we don’t talk about season 6 because it’s a friggin minefield especially when you’re planted in the Destiel camp, because of how the show used Cas that season as, essentially, the main antagonist, all the way through the season.

(Also we don’t talk about it because it really hurts, I assume :P I mean I accidentally started a season 7 fanclub but that season’s relatively easy once you have hindsight that it’s all distilled Pining For A Dead Loved One with a safety net that the loved one comes back, but hindsight doesn’t do anything to having to sit through a dozen episodes of them at each other’s throats and everyone angry and everything is awful all the time >.> The closest we get to cracking any jokes around Cas is the pizza man exchange.)

Their whole tension in season 6 is that Cas isn’t coming when Dean calls and not helping them (and ugh that line is one of those ones that’s terrible in context but romantic in a gifset and thank goodness Cas says it in nicer context at least once because it was manipulative and not true in context), and they ONLY see him when they demand he comes to them, unlike previous seasons where he was always the one bringing stuff to them, or it was more obviously an equal exchange of help, like 5x10 and all the stuff where they were working together to find the Colt. I don’t think there’s a single time they see Cas that year where they didn’t wrangle him down from Heaven with threats or bribes or weary resignation that asking him to come see about the one thing he’s actually interested in is the only way to get him to come home (Dean being the unappreciated wife with the trouble child, in this case, an entire side of the season away from Crowley accusing Cas of being the philandering husband >.>) 

So in the first couple of episodes they mention Cas hasn’t been answering and that’s his implicit guilt in the same thing that @thejabberwock was saying Dean could have easily never forgiven Bobby and Sam over doing… And I think because they were on the same side and working together through the season and so on, at the very least they get over some of it just because close proximity and fighting side by side, and by the time all the cards are on the table re: Sam’s soul, by 6x07 or so, I think Dean can pretty much say it’s not really their fault if Sam was the moral compass on that decision. I mean he’s angry and miserable so I don’t think he has a sit down with himself and comes to that healthy decision, but over time I think it would easily slip away. 

But in 6x20 the worst part of it is the Cas watches Dean rake leaves moment, which not only uses the fact this *still hurts* that he didn’t come to Dean for help and bring Dean back into hunting when if anyone could have started it again it would have been Cas in that moment, but then in the actual confrontation we get another brief flashback to Cas turning away from Dean and going with Crowley when Dean asks where he was, so Cas making this mistake was the hugest part of the betrayal - that at the very least he could have let Dean know what he was doing, or they could have fought against impossible odds TOGETHER again to whatever end. I mean, like, there’s the genuine implication in that confrontation if you want to see it this way, that Dean would rather the world end but Cas hadn’t betrayed them and at least they could all go out on a moral high ground. 

Through the season it’s like what me and @mittensmorgul talk about sometimes about the whole unfinished conversation through the seasons, only when it starts here as a sort of one season microcosm version, it’s that Cas can’t and won’t tell Dean what he’s doing and why, and so Dean’s telling him stuff like, that’s ALL you’ve told us, when Cas repeats the couple of easy facts to explain what he’s doing. Dean gets to the end of the conversation in any meaningful way in 6x04 with Bobby and by the end of 6x07 he knows pretty much everything soulless!Sam didn’t tell him, including all his motivations, so he’s quite happy to work with him and try and get his soul back once all the cards are on the table. (I mean Bobby explained his motivations for keeping Dean out of the game back in 6x01 and we have no reason to suspect Bobby ever had any ulterior motives, but they had family teething problems for a bit - the first 4 episodes of the season deal with 1 member of TFW each and since Bobby had the lowest stakes of any of them, he gets resolved first to just go back to being dependable old Bobby with no particular emotional drama except being concerned about them/saving the world.)

But they hold off on using Cas until the 3rd episode and when he shows up he answers none of their questions in a satisfying way, shrugs off concern about not answering with the line about having a more profound bond with Dean (another one of those lines that looks great on a bumper sticker and has a lot of truth to it when you go deeper, but in context is actually a really shitty thing to say), and then he spends the episode not really answering anything, except for blatantly being in the middle of an escalating angel war so he has to admit some things like why angels are attacking him or why there’s even a problem they called him down for in the first place. We get his conversation alone with Balthazar to keep plot chatter away from the Winchesters and then he grants him his freedom because he needs Balthazar’s help more than he needs the good opinion of the Winchesters, especially because he’s already firmly decided with the raking leaves scene that they’re not going to be a part of it.

And that just makes the pattern from there that for the rest of the season Cas only comes when it suits him (aka when stakes are too high in the other direction - his war or Sam and Dean getting hurt, or occasionally when he can tell their friendship is really on the line if he doesn’t go, to the point he can’t make amends after he wins - that he has to drop by and try and reassure them or to get involved because they’re accidentally involved in the angel war or what have  you) even when Dean’s really worried about Sam - something we don’t know for sure until 6x20 that Cas is wracked with guilt about and also is fairly helpless to reveal his part in raising Sam about because it opens up too many other questions, namely the one about why he never got back in contact with Dean after 5x22. So it keeps on coming back to the massive void being that Cas saved Sam but then wouldn’t go to Dean for help, and it’s the empty space in his reasoning for why he doesn’t go to them casually for the entire season. 

12x19 offered us his actual motivations when it comes to them about how he feels and that he wants to protect them and I think when he justifies it he’s actually telling the truth about it because I think part of it was there was a lot of startling emotional honesty… Cas actually naming his motivations as Sam and Dean is a bit of a running joke in the show, in a very dark way, that he’ll always say it’s for Heaven like in season 9, and when Metatron called him out on it, he mostly just looked sad and affronted. Sadffronted. :P Anyway he just straight up tells Kelvin, no it’s not about Heaven and my reputation there, and honestly stuff you guys but I need some extra man power and resources, to do this for Sam and Dean. And he’s honest about the same thing when Sam and Dean catch up to him later. In season 6, which was a season-long version of the dynamic 12x19 explored as part of the Cas Retrospective of season 12, he mostly just bristled with impotent rage when things got this close to the surface, snapped something cryptic, and disappeared :P I mean I can’t even remember an exact moment that happened but he was exploiting the fact he could disappear at will to end a conversation like nobody’s business back then.

But because Cas won’t tell them anything meaningful about the plot, is massively unhelpful about Crowley until he just strategically kills him to stop the Winchesters asking too many questions, and avoids Dean over the issue of Sam’s soul, the entire first half of the season is filled with non-stop snapping, and actually Dean’s feelings towards Cas escalating into frustration and anger that only gets worse as the season goes on, and Cas can only give very small respites with unhelpful little promises he doesn’t have to follow up on if he keeps avoiding them. He gets himself a bit of a break when Crowley is dead because there’s less chance of the Winchesters stumbling onto the plan if they don’t think there’s a plan to stumble onto, and Eve works great as a distraction right up until she just goes and tells them that Crowley is still alive… But there’s a very uneasy feeling between Cas and Dean the entire time because the angel war distracting Cas is a huge hovering issue even when they’re talking about other stuff, and they never get a chance to foster better feelings or celebrate a win together or anything like that. 6x18 is possibly the only time they have a sort of aaaalmost uncomplicated good feeling and that’s because they won the episode, Cas has mostly managed to avoid suspicion about why he got stabbed.

I think it’s actually a testament to how much Cas means to Dean that when 6x20 rolls around, Dean is still staunchly defending Cas to begin with, that he can think Cas might have had his reasons all through this and that he thinks Cas is one of the good guys and can be reasoned with and if they treat him on the level it will all be fine. And in a way that is because they made it all through the season without ever addressing WHY Cas didn’t talk to him for a year so it’s sort of more like forgotten with all the new drama that’s happened since, rather than forgiven, because of course that WHY finally comes to the surface, and it turns into the entire reason they can’t reconcile this and why it’s so far gone that they missed the chance to reconcile it right back when Cas made the decision not to get Dean involved.

So I think… in a meta way… that THEY were not talking about season 6 until it was too late and that’s why Dean ever let things pass with Cas until it turned out they’d been betrayed and they should have been talking about season 6 with Cas :P I think that ultimatum didn’t really come out of the blue because Dean had been pissed off with Cas all season, but there was a sort of deep heart of hearts feeling that Cas had to utterly forsake before Dean would see Cas as betraying them, because he trusted and cared about him so much he couldn’t see it coming no matter how shady Cas acted, which meant that he was letting everything sketchy Cas did pass, including the hanging question of why HE didn’t tell Dean that Sam was back from the dead. I mean it gets to teenage girl writing in a diary, maybe he didn’t notice me because he was busy, sort of justifications but I said somewhere or other recently I think 6x20 confirmed their feelings on both sides (and I think it’s weird I’ve ever seen people say that it only confirmed one or the other, especially when I’ve seen that said both ways :P). And Dean giving Cas all those chances and benefit of the doubt to the point you could see the “oh hon” on Bobby’s face… Yeah. 

Also his determination that they could fix everything if Cas just backed off and let them help >.> Like, yeah, you’d have had to have a COMPLETELY different season to make that work - the entire point was it was unwinnable and the best Cas could do was utterly give up everything he ever had - allies, family, morality - to sacrifice for that fight, and he forsakes them all through the season in various small ways, culminating in a total loss of self but his goals completed. Dean’s version of the season where he gets to keep Cas would have been a loss but an emotional victory, and that is not what Cas could bear at that point. And 12x19 also makes the point of emotional victories and moral victories, and again I think that it’s like Dean’s pleas in 6x20 echo all the way up to current canon to remind Cas why he COULDN’T give in to Dean’s request.

The speed run of season 6 is 5x22 > 6x20 without taking a breath, because after all the nonsense and running around and red herrings, Cas ties the entire story back into what had just happened in Swan Song and how he made his decisions, and his conversation with Dean in the car at the end of Swan Song about “peace or freedom” is the key question there which defines Cas’s arc of the season and his decision for leaving Dean out. Dean chose freedom but regretted not going for peace because it was this promise of peace in 5x16, the talk of a paradise and a perfect bliss in Heaven, that swung him the most to nearly saying yes. Cas knows he picked freedom for everyone else but wanted peace in his heart of hearts and it’s the same thing Amara picked on in season 11, that Dean wanted quiet, and it’s the same thing Jack promised Cas and Cas repeated to Kelly. And was Michael and Raphael’s apocalypse sales pitch. 

So all these things are thematically linked together. I guess I’m still typing because it all ends up back at season 12 and presumably 13 based on how these apocalypse-era themes and now characters are back. In the raking leaves scene Cas picked peace for Dean, to stay with Lisa in oblivion in the suburbs, which denied Dean the choice (aka freedom) to help him, and in the start of season 6 we can use Bobby and Sam’s similar decision to leave Dean out to show it’s people deciding for him and not giving him a choice about how to live his life. I’m pretty sure the line “so Dean doesn’t have to” would fit perfectly in 6x20 as much as 12x19. And at the end of the day, Dean knows Cas is annoyingly right, that they’re Team Free Will (hence also… 12x19 hello again :P) and Dean embodies free will and will always end up fighting for it - but of course that doesn’t mean he can’t have a personal struggle with it, which makes it all the more interesting. They just made the decision for him to give into the bad side of the struggle - to let peace win when for Dean it should always be freedom because that’s what he’s the epitome of. 

And in 6x20 that’s what they fight about at the very very end, when Dean accuses Cas that he shouldn’t do whatever he wants and that he’s a child for trying, because he sees Cas as just not grasping these concepts properly, not understanding without the key information (that Cas’s motivations are HIM, the unfinished part of the conversation, the missing puzzle piece to all their interactions, etc) and knowing just how much Cas has grappled with this off screen and Cas’s understanding and motivations. I mean, the VO of the episode is from AFTER this argument, so I think Cas’s opinion on himself and his hubris and arrogance all comes AFTER and maybe BECAUSE OF the bollocking Dean gives him, because he has all the puzzle pieces (or nearly all) and genuine self-reflection and he’s in the position to wryly look back on everything he’s caused from this simple set of choices. He identifies all his own shortcomings but still sees there’s no other way and he’s going to have to make the leap to truly give up his morality and sense of self to accomplish what he needs.

And that’s also, to jump back to season 12, and weirdly I was having a dream about chilling with her last night, Lily Sunder, a literal mirror opposite to Cas in some ways, the human who got in too deep with angels instead of the angels who got in too deep with humans. She’s giving up parts of herself to get revenge, which is the opposite mission to Cas’s in season 6, to protect his loved ones. In a great metaphor for literally every revenge mission ever in this show and other media, Lily is losing her soul the longer she sustains herself on the mission. But it’s also a good metaphor to the idea of giving yourself up for any mission, to the point of only thinking you can accomplish it at a total loss of yourself. Cas gives her a way out to not complete it because she got absolution with Ishim, the one who truly hurt her, and peace with Cas as seeing him as truly repentant and changed and being able to say the right words to set her mind at rest. But Cas didn’t get that chance to not carry on his mission because it was one of protecting them before the bad stuff happened so the stakes were too high to be talked down from. He also tries to talk Dean back from a total loss of self in 10x22 for what good that does. And I think that’s all from experience - of knowing how it is to go over that line and thinking things are justified until they consume you. Cas had to shed his morality and his emotional attachment to Sam and Dean in order to work against them completely as the antagonist once his role was revealed to them and they boxed him into it by not understanding or giving him a chance - because they were more concerned for HIM than the bigger stakes - and so he could break Sam’s wall in order to get the job done. 

And to me that becomes the REAL hurt he caused them in season 6, far far over the earlier choices he has, and he needs to fix Sam immediately when he returns in season 7 and then spend the rest of the season in an arc about understanding and forgiveness and apologies with Dean. And that all springs from the earlier lies and betrayals and stuff but trying to tackle what Cas should have done in the start of season 6 is impossible because in many ways he was basically already the wrong word away from a 6x20 style confrontation every time they met him from 6x03 onwards (which is probably why he looks like he has a migraine the entire season :P) and so I don’t think there’s ANY WAY they could have plausibly sold any sort of real reconciliation or forgiveness in the start of the season if they’d wanted to, which they didn’t because they wanted Dean to be pissed at Cas all season for reasons which were just as frustrating and opaque to US, and I don’t know what they knew for sure about the end of the season but they were definitely planning all along for Cas to have a baaaad bad part in it because he was shifty and showing tells of lying and so on from the get go. I think if they’d made a twee moment for Dean to be given a chance to forgive Cas for not talking to him for a year, it would have basically just escalated Dean’s suspicion through the roof because Cas would never have been able to sell it when the bigger picture of why he did it was what all eventually poured out in TMWWBK. 

(here's a link to my rewatch of 6x20 where I ramble a LOT more about the philosophy behind it all)