#baby's first stupid wot joke

[utilitycaster]

rejected D&D subclasses

singblader (rogue who can activate their singblade and cast spells, which don't get sneak attack on them, for a minute)

circle of life druid (you can only Wildshape into Rafiki from the Lion King)

oath of hippocrates paladin (doesn't actually say you can do no harm but everyone thinks it does)

way of the leaf monk (no, for real, do no harm)

path of least resistance barbarian (ditto)

patron of the arts warlock (50% off at the museum gift shop)

school of business wizard (under investigation from the FTC)

cleric: eminent domain (self-explanatory)

[blackbutler-readerinsertsandjunk]

How do you imagine it would go if the Noah’s Ark Circus boys are sleeping next to their hypermobile fem s/o for the first time and then her joints start clicking and popping as she stretches and she doesn’t even bat an eye because this is normal for her? I hope this is fine.

totally fine!

these sweet boys I'm gonna cry <3

… Mh, damn, is his leg acting up again? Makin’ stupid sounds? “Sorry, love,” he mumbles as he tries to go back to sleep. He’s convinced it was his body making the clicks and pops, because his prosthetic leg obviously isn’t perfect and has made noises like that before. He just ignores it because it’s part of life for him, but he makes the effort to apologize because it’s strange for anyone who doesn’t know what it is. As soon as he registers that it was her joints making those sounds, he lifts his head up, blinks at her, and laughs. “Oh, my God, y’ do that too??” He thinks it’s cuter coming from her than it is from him. With that settled, he simply shrugs. His arm’s circled a little more securely around her, and he nestles in so they can go back to sleep. It’s normal for him, too, so no reason to be fussed about it.

Eh? What’s that…? Sorry, love, sounds like he forgot to oil his arm! As with most things, he tries to make a joke of it; especially because he’s self-conscious about his ‘bad’ arm, he’d prefer a laugh instead of an eye roll or an annoyed look aimed his way. Like Dagger, he thinks it’s him making the noises. His arm pops and clicks sometimes. Of course, then he looks over, sees her stretching, and it’s like a light bulb goes off that… it’s her! He chuckles about it, teasing, “Aha! Well. Guess we both need some oil so our joints don’t creak, eh, beauty?” It’s something they have in common, even if it’s something strange, so he doesn’t mind it a bit. It’s almost endearing, as long as it doesn’t mean she’s in pain. He snuggles back up and murmurs for her to try to drift back off. Not a big deal at all. A little funny, just not a big deal.

Oi, wot’s that… somethin’ 'appenin’…?? His mind processes those noises as a part of some odd dream he’s having, at first. Although he does hear those things occasionally thanks to Joker, Beast, and Dagger having limbs which make similar sounds, the thought somehow didn’t occur to him that perhaps his S/O’s joints might make them too. Once he looks over at her to realize that those pops and clicks are coming from her, he’s quick to ask, even half-asleep, “Oi… y’ alright, sweet’eart? Y’ ‘urtin’?” His first instinct is to think she’s in pain, so he’s ready to wake himself up and help. Then, just as fast, he’s assured that it must not be serious. If it was painful, she’d probably be reacting more than that. Regardless, he worries about her always, so he scoops her up a little bit closer. A hand on her back, holding her gently, and reminding her that he’s here if she needs anything before he goes back to sleep. Though, he only returns to his dream once she’s asleep first.

Lord, but what the blue ‘ell is that?! It sounds like a buncha baby gunshots or some shite. By this point he’s tired, so he’s trying hard not to snap, it’s just that he doesn’t know what the noises could be. Despite having heard similar things where Dagger, Joker, and Beast’s artificial limbs are concerned, he didn’t even wonder about whether (Name)’s joints did it. The idea makes him give a little huff, mainly for the fact that he was woken up because of anything. It’s not necessarily irritating to him in general. He grumbles for a bit, then nuzzles against her to make sure she isn’t in pain or anything. Once he’s confirmed that, he reaches down to give a gentle rub at her knee like he sometimes does. “C’mon, precious. Let’s go back t’ sleep.” With any luck, the both of them are out within minutes in each other’s arms.

(… Do you hear something?) It’s likely nothing, Oscar. Don’t worry. (No, I hear it too!) Well, if Emily and Oscar are agreeing, perhaps it’s something after all. He pushes himself up a bit in bed and looks around, bleary-eyed, and neither him nor the snakes see anything of note. However, then he looks over at his sweetheart, and… oh. He figures it out a little faster than any of the others, simply because he’s incredibly observant. The snakes possibly being nearby and hearing exactly where the sounds are coming from helps, too. Even though he’s hesitant to touch her too much, he reaches to put a hand on her arm and whispers, “Is everything alright? Are you in pain?” He doesn’t fail to cover it by clarifying that the snakes want to know, instead of him. Still… she doesn’t look to be hurting. She seems fine. He scoots himself closer anyway, wrapping his arms around her as if to protect her as they sleep. There. Nice and secure.

[harrysgloves]

In the Middle

Harry Styles x Reader x Florence Pugh

Story Summary: Florence and Harry are smitten with their makeup artist on set. 

Word Count: 10k (dear god I got carried away. I’m so sorry)

Warnings: Language // Threesome // MFF // Oral Sex (Female Receiving) // Unprotected Sex // Spanking (I couldn’t not include this) // Dirty Talk // W | W (obviously) // Mentions of religion (it’s more a metaphor.. not sure how to explain that?) // 

Authors Note: Woooo boy, she’s finally done. Been working on this baby for a while so please comment. I’d love to hear your feedback! Also, the reader has an adopted last name in this... Not sure if that bothers anyone or not but if it does please tell me and I won’t do that in future fics.

>>><<<

It was your first day on this movie set and honestly, you were scared shitless. This movie was so star-studded you were almost positive that you'd say something stupid to at least one of them. That'd be just your luck, your first job as lead makeup artist and you'd let some gibberish crap fall out your mouth. 

You took a deep breath, standing in front of the door to your trailer. Your trailer. It was so surreal, you were finally getting your lead moment, and all you could think about was 'I better not mess this up and get black listed.'

"Gonna open the door or are ya goin' to do makeup out 'ere?" The voice from behind you caught you off guard. You wished you wouldn't have let out the shriek when you jumped around to see the beautiful specimen of a man standing in front of you.

Of fucking course it had to be one of the main actors.

Your face heated. Your cheeks burned hotter than the sun when you heard him chuckle from his spot. His hands shoved deep in his pockets as he looked at you like you were the most amusing thing he'd seen in a while.

"Don't scare the poor girl." His co-star said as she walked up from behind him. Her hand slapped against his chest as she walked past him and towards you. His grin never faltered as you stood there completely starstruck and trying your best to not be a blubbering idiot.

"Here, lemme help." She said as she held out her hand. A sweet smile forming on her lips when you handed her the keys.

"Always make me out to be a dick, love." Harry mumbled to Florence when she finally found the right key to your trailer door. 

"Easy to make you out to be a dick when you are one." She said with a shrug. He rolled his eyes but you could tell it was all in good fun. "If he messes with you, jus' tell me. I'll take care of him."

"Think she's gonna 'ave to talk to us 'fore she goes tellin' on me." He smiled widely as he teased you. Whatever shred of your usually vibrant personality had been completely washed away by nerves. You couldn't believe you were standing in either of their presence.

If only your 13 year old self could see you now. Even she would be telling you that you're a fucking idiot.

"We don't bite." Florence said as she pulled you inside your trailer. Your head nodded because honestly it was the only way to guarantee that you wouldn't say something stupid.

"Unless yeh want us to." Harry teased. Florence immediately shot him a look you'd never want to see directed at you.

"I'm good." You squeaked out. Your bag being quickly thrown on your table before you turned on all the lights to the place.

It was simple but it was completely yours. You were finally the head honcho, the boss, the shot caller. It was all up to you- how the makeup looked, how the prosthetic were applied. It was something you were pretty sure would never happen to you but knowing Olivia Wilde definitely had it's privileges.

You'd never imagined working on The Lazarus Effect would lead to almost a five year friendship with so many great opportunities. Plus, she didn’t judge you for your train-wreck of nerves you had your first day of work.

"So yeh know us. Wot's yeh name?" Harry asked you after mindless banter with Florence. Her head filled with curlers turned to look at you standing over Harry. The foundation you were dabbing on his face smeared slightly as your nerves picked back up. 

You were never good at the talking part of the job. Not until you warmed up to people a bit. You were definitely more reserved of the makeup artist in the industry. You stuck to yourself for the most part and only your closet friends knew how you really were and you really preferred not getting mixed up in any celebrity business.

"Um, Y/N." You said as you sat the makeup brush down on your table before moving to start taking the curlers out of Florence's silky blonde hair. The perfectly formed curls bounced out, your fingers ran through them to diffuse them a bit. 

"Been doing this long?" She asked as you busied yourself with hair. Trying your best to not pull or tug on it too hard and hurting her on accident.

"Not long." You said, the nerves you had dissipated a bit when you talked about something that you enjoyed doing. "Five years but I mostly did low budget horror films."

"Step up from that then, innit?" Harry asked, both their eyes burned into you. Your face immediately heated again at the attention.

"A bit." You said as you finally took the last roller out of Florence's hair. You were so close to being done and getting away from everybody long enough for your anxiety to let up. "First movie I get to be in charge of the makeup department."

"Explains the nerves." Florence hummed out as she sat up in the chair, fluffing her own hair a bit as she examined your work.

"Yeah, sorry about earlier. I get a little lost in the mornings without coffee." You paid close attention to them both smiling at you. Somehow feeling like you were missing a joke until they both spoke at the same time.

"You should do tea instead."

"Never going to happen. I need my coffee to function." You said pointedly, knowing deep in your heart that you would forever be a coffee lover. 

"No way." Florence scoffed but you didn't miss that hint of a smirk on her lips as she looked towards Harry.

"'Aven't had the right tea."

"I'm not abandoning my one true love like that." You said with your arms crossed over your chest.

"Boyfriend doesn't get mad that coffee is your one true love?" Florence asked while Harry nodded his head in agreement. 

You couldn't help the laugh that left your. A fit of giggles you didn't think you'd be letting out near them any time soon or ever. Your hand came up to tell them to give you a second to compose yourself. Their eyes moved back and forth between each other and you, confusion clearly etched into their expressions.

"You really think me, who couldn't even open the door this morning, is out hitting on people? Honestly, that's the best compliment I've ever gotten." You said as you turned back around to sit down the rest of the curlers in your hands. Random giggles still escaping from you as you shook your head in disbelief. 

"They could've came onto yeh." Harry said like he was trying to figure you out. Another burst of laughter came from you when you turned back around, hands on your hips as you looked at both the ungodly beautiful people in front of you.

"I'm not really the type that attracts attention but really this was a great confidence booster." You smiled at them, whatever words both of them were about to say was interrupted by the knock on the trailer door.

"Hey, you guys are needed on set." Some assistant said quickly before walking away from the trailer. 

"Guess we gotta go. We'll see you in a bit." Florence smiled brightly at you before turning and walking out the door with a cute bounce in her step.

"See yeh, love." Harry mumbled, his hand ran through his thick brown curls that you'd spent too much time styling for no reason. He followed her out the door. His long confidant strides quickly caught up with Florence. His arm around her shoulder talking to her as you shut the door.

Maybe working with them wouldn't be so bad. Maybe you'd even learn how to not be a total mess around famous people or maybe you could even make new friends. It was a nice thought you decided, they both seemed genuinely nice to you and you could always use new connections to get yourself out there a bit more.

>>>

It only took 4 hours and a shit ton of retouches on everyone's makeup to finally get to your break for the day. Your feet were sore, your whole body felt like it'd been beat up, and you still hadn't had any caffeine. If you didn't get any in you soon you'd be cast in the next remake of Godzilla.

You quickly jumped at the opportunity to run like the wind when it was announced it was lunch time. Your sprint towards freedom was stopped at the sound of your name being called out. You groaned quietly to yourself, cursing whatever god out there for hating you this much. 

All you wanted was a damn coffee, was that too much to ask for?! You didn't think so, but apparently, someone out in the universe had it out for you today. 

Fast footsteps sounded from behind you as you stood in your spot. Yes, you were making them come to you because fuck them for not realizing lunch time meant you didn't want to chitchat.

"Wanna grab lunch with us?" Her voice rang from behind you, making you feel like such an asshole for making her walk to you.

You turned around to see the group of people she wanted you to have lunch with. Which included everyone from the set. Not just her and Harry, everyone. 

Your eyes widened as you looked at all of them. There was no way you could fake it through lunch with all those people you didn't know looking at you. Expecting you to be able to answer simple questions about yourself. Being able to carry on a semi decent conversation. You were exhausted at the mere thought of trying to not seem like a total nutcase for an entire hour. 

"Thanks but I think I'm going to put on a pot of coffee in my trailer." You said as your eyes moved away from the crowd of people back to her. Her face couldn't hide emotions even in the slightest bit. Her eyebrows furrowed, lips rolled into her mouth, trying to not look disappointed but you could see the hint of it lingering behind her eyes.

"Sure. Have a good lunch." She said in a soft voice that made your heart feel like it was getting ripped out of your chest. 

You stood and watched long enough to see her shaking her head at Harry. His arm around her shoulder as he frowned down at her before looking up to you. A soft smile across his lips before he bent down to say something lowly in Florence's ear.

You turned on the spot and headed for your trailer. A sigh of relief left you the second the door closed. You were always the type that needed recharge time. You had to be alone for a bit here and there during the day so you could unwind. Wash all the anxiety from being around people off you.

You hit the playlist you had saved on your phone as your chill out music. The coffee pot in your trailer gurgled in the background over your music. The slow soft beats filled the air around you. Swirling beautiful with the scent of the coffee.

You lived for this shit. 

"Listen to the wind blow, watch the sun rise.

Running in the shadows, damn your love, damn your lies."

You were at the best moment, the cup of coffee in your hand, your voice echoing the words of the song you had a slight obsession with when a knock came from your door.

"Shit!" You yelled when the coffee from your cup splashed out at your knee-jerk reaction to the interruptive knock. The hot liquid barely missed you but still… you could cry over spilled coffee, right?

You threw down a towel you had in arms reach on the floor before scurrying to the door. Hoping it was Olivia here to tell you that she decided to go in a different direction and needed to replace you as head makeup artist.

"Scares like a cat." Harry said more to Florence than you when your head poked out of the door. You rolled your eyes but couldn't help the smile forming on your lips. 

"You made me spill my coffee." You said with a fake pout. Harry's eye brightened as his dimpled smile came across his face. 

"Good, we brought you something better." Florence chimed in, a cup of something that definitely wasn't coffee in her hand was now glaring at you. A bag of take out boxes in another.

"Ew." You scrunched your nose as you looked at the offensive cup. Your hand finally opened the door enough for them both to slip in.

"You guys didn't have to bring me lunch." You brows furrowed. Why were they being so nice to you? You had no idea. You weren't really the friendly type, not until you warmed up to people at least.

"Noticed yeh didn't 'ave lunch with yeh. Can't run on coffee and no food." Harry shrugged slightly. Like it wasn't a big deal that they somehow managed to notice you had no lunch with you that day. Your confusion grew more by the second. Maybe this was how people became friends? You weren't entirely sure.

"Love this song." Harry muttered before he plopped down on the love-seat in your trailer. His feet kicked up on the coffee table, obviously making himself at home in your space. 

"It's a good one but nothing tops 'Dreams'." You said as you took a seat on one of your makeup chairs, Florence sat on the other side of Harry.

"You two have the same bad taste in music." She groaned as she fished out the first take out box from the bag she had in her hand. Your shocked gasp made her pause.

"How dare you say that about our Lord and Savior, Stevie Nicks. You should be ashamed of yourself." Your dramatic voice and Harry's laughter of agreement made her roll her eyes at you both. Quickly going back to unpacking the bag they brought for all three of you.

"Want us to turn on 'Wonderwall' for you?" You asked through a voice cracked with laughter. Her green eyes immediately snapped to yours, narrowing at you.

"Fuckin' hell, that was a good one." Harry mumbled out, his arm wrapped around her as he smiled widely at her fake pouting.

"See if I bring you lunch ever again." She mumbled under her breath. Finally done unloading the three take out boxes and all the utensils out of the bag. 

You gave her a fake pout. Her eyes rolled when she handed you the box. You were too curious for your own good most of the time, right now though, you were scared to open this box and some weird ass Hollywood "lunch" would be staring back at you.

Harry's amused eyes kept meeting yours when you'd look up from your box to whatever the hell they were eating. Nothing but rabbit food and not the good kind either, whatever they were managing to shovel down their throats smelled like rotten eggs. You were trying your best to not be a whiny brat about getting free lunch when you heard Harry let out a chuckle from his side of the room. Florence immediately looked up to see you staring blankly at the box in front of you.

"Gonna open it up, kitten?" Harry asked with an infuriating smug smile on his lips. Your eyes rolled at the nickname but you couldn't deny it stirred something in you.

"We didn’t get you steamed kale." Florence giggled when the sigh of relief left you. 

"Thank fuck. I thought I was going to have to gag that crap down." You smiled when you opened the box. A plate of harmless looking pasta sat in front of you. All the carbs and wonderful goodness in the world that you absolutely adored. 

Leave the healthy shit for them, you thought.

"Wait!" She yelled from across the room, you jumped slightly at the loud sound making Harry laugh. "Got to try this first."

"No way. I'd rather eat the stinky kale then whatever's in this." You tried to push your hand away from the drink she was adamantly trying to hand you. 

"Come on. Jus' fo' fun, yeah? Never 'ave to try anything new again with us if yeh don't like it." Harry said. Florence head snapped around to him quickly before looking back at you. A curt nod of her soft blonde curls told you she agreed with him.

You took the cup from her. Cautiously opening the lid to peak at the color of the drink. A bright green color stared back at you. Your nose scrunched up at the sight but the smell wasn't the worst, not compared to the steamed green leaves the other two were eating. 

"Bottoms up. If I die, tell my parents I was forced to drink this." You mumbled out right before downing half the cup of cold green liquid. You hoped if you chugged it the way you did cheap beer when you were 19 would mean you wouldn't taste it much.

You were wrong but surprisingly you were thankfully you got a good taste because it was fucking delicious.

Your eyes brightened when you took the next sip. Slower this time to actually enjoy the drink. 

"Told yeh she'd like it." Harry said with a smug smile across his face. The look of triumph directed toward Florence who pushed his shoulder with her own at his comment.

"Sod off, Harold."

"This is really good." You said in between drinks. A very prominent caffeine buzz started to hit you by the time you'd finished the last drop.

"Got more caffeine too." Harry smiled brightly. Florence rolled her eyes as she stabbed a piece of kale with her fork.

"Yeah, well, the pasta was my idea and I'm sure she'll love it." She grumbled like it was some sort of contest between them.

It didn’t take long for you to realize you actually liked hanging out with the both of them. They were able to keep up a conversation with ease, even whenever you didn't feel like talking they both could somehow sense it. They weren't draining to be around, which really surprised you. 

The both of them could joke and tease. You and Florence ganged up on Harry. Harry and you on her. Florence and Harry on you. Nonstop teasing, jokes, and enough laughter you could feel your cheeks ache by the end of lunch. 

You definitely could see yourself being genuine friends with both of them.

>>>

To say you three managed to get close fast was an understatement. You three practically became inseparable by the end of the first week of shooting. If all three of you weren't together at least two of you were and the other one wasn't far behind.

It quickly became a joke on set. People constantly had to find where the three of you had snuck off to. Which was usually to the food table that was set up for the actors but Harry insisted that it was for everyone, even though you knew it wasn't.

He didn't care though, he just wanted to make sure you actually ate for the day and not just down caffeinated drinks for a meal. Florence on the other hand, was more than willing to invite you to lunch every single day. Her pleas for you to join the two of them was impossible to turn down after a while. 

You figured it was pointless anyways since they brought back food for you every time you said you weren't hungry. So today was the day you'd finally gave in to her cute pouting.

"This place looks like they have those really small dishes that cost more than my rent." You mumbled to Florence as you approached the building that looked like it had jumped out of a magazine.

"You'll love it!" She beamed brightly from beside you. You wanted to believe her, you really did, but you were more of a cheap bar food type of girl. In fact, the bar by your house now knew you by name whenever you walked through the door. Which was only slightly pathetic, but you didn't have many friends and you weren't that good at making new ones, so you weren't in any position to hurt her feelings by not liking this place.

Her hand slipped casually into yours as you neared closer to the building. Harry rounded the corner from parking his car right before you two crossed the street. His long legs stride easily over to you two, his arm around your shoulder. 

That was another thing that had threw you a bit off guard at first. They both were so touchy. Your hair, your face, holding hands, hugging, hands resting on your thigh. One of them always had a hand on you any time they could. It was a little strange at first but you quickly realized this was just how they were with you.

And you'd be lying to yourself if you said you didn't enjoy it now. 

"I can feel yeh bein' nervous from 'ere." Harry said so closely to your ear you could feel the soft touches of his lips against you. 

Your breathing seemed to stop for a second before you swallowed the feeling and turned to him. Eyes wide as you glanced back to Florence, trying to tell him to shut up before she realized you didn't want to be eating French cuisine.

He chuckled, shaking his head before pulling you back to the table that was already set up for you guys. 

This was fancy and you were so out of place. The small table in the corner tucked you guys away from everyone. The stark white linen over the table had you anxious from the moment you sat down. Who the fuck puts white on a table?! At least the dim lighting had your back. This way no one could see you choke on a snail as you faked your way through this lunch.

Florence hand rested on one of your legs, Harry's on the other, both of them deliberately choosing to ignore your anxious feet tapping on the floor.

"Sweetheart?" Harry called you out of your panic from looking at the menu that was in French. Screw your 14 year old self for taking 4 years of Spanish in high school. "I can order fo' yeah if you want."

"Oh, I think I'm gonna have the, um…" you paused, squinting at the menu of fancy font. "Langue de boeuf?"

"Okay, 'm not lettin' yeh eat tongue." Harry snickered when your nose scrunched up. Who in their right mind would ever want to eat that?

"Wait…" Florence said as she sat down her menu in front of her with her one free hand. Your eyes glinting over to see her looking so confused, yet so adorable with her scrunched brows pulled together. Her head tilted as she blinked a few times at you. "Do you- do you not like French food?"

"I've just… never had it before." You settled for a half-truth, not wanting to hurt her feelings.

"Your last name is François!" She said as her cheeks turned flaming red. Harry's snicker from beside you did nothing to help her embarrassment. Your hand quickly squeezed his, hard, under the table to tell him to stop.

"I'm adopted," You smiled widely at her surprised expression. It's not like she knew you were adopted and she really was being so sweet planning all this out, thinking you'd feel at home here. "And the only thing French about my dad is he knows how to say beget."

"God, I'm so sorry, if- if I'd known, I'd neve-" 

"Flor, please," you smiled as you took her hands away from fiddling with her menu. "I never told you. It's not a big deal. Besides, now you two can order for me in your fancy French words."

You dismissed her worrying with a wave of your hand and a gently prod of the menu. If anything, this was the most heartwarmingly considerate thing anyone had ever done for you. At least she tried to include things with the three of you that you'd also like.

When the, equally nervous as you, waiter finally approached your table to take your drink orders you were glad those two were handling everything. It felt sort of like being spoiled and you'd take that any day of the week. 

"I know you." The waiter, Grayson you learned from his name tag, said after a few awkward seconds of standing in front of the table. You were only half listening, assuming it was for either one of the obviously famous people sitting beside you. "Yeah! That's right you're Y/N Y/L/N-François!"

Your eyes widened, cheeks heated as you squirmed in your seat. Both Florence and Harry looking back and forth between you and your new fan.

"God, your makeup on insta is amazing. The special effects stuff is so good. Really, I'm a big fan." He gushed as you mumbled out a small thank you, your hand clutching the complementary cup of water in front of you like it was a life raft. "Here, you can have my insta handle. Maybe you can DM sometime."

His movements to start writing down his Instagram information came to a screeching halt when both Harry and Florence shot him glares. The tension grew thick between the three of them. Some sort of a weird show down as you tried to drink your water and ignore the awkwardness.

Maybe they didn't like their friends being bothered at lunch when they were with them? You weren't sure. In all honesty, this never happened to you but you could see why this would be annoying for them. They had to deal with it all the time.

This is what they'd do for any of their friends. Right?

The tension finally eased when the waiter left the table. Your cup finally placed back down on the white linen when you let out a sigh of relief. You weren't one for strangers and they both knew it. Maybe they were just telling that guy to screw off because of your nerves, yeah that was it.

The rest of the lunch went much better than you expected. Conversation between you three was never a problem but even the food was amazing.

The two of them had great taste.

"Come on. Gonna be late if we don't get out of here." Florence mumbled, her hand already in yours as she pulled you out of the seat. You didn't even have time to get a word out when Harry threw down an ungodly wad of money on the table.

"You didn't have to pay for me." You said when he caught up to you. His hand on your lower back as he guided you through the door.

"What kind of date would that be?" Florence said without thinking. Your confused eyes shooting to her briefly before looking at the horrified Harry. "Lunch date, meant lunch date, with friends."

"Oh," you said, still a bit confused but chugging through it so you didn't have any awkward conversations. "Still, thank you."

Harry's tensed shoulders relaxed when he gave you a nodd. His eyes shot daggers to Florence over your head as you three started walking.

"I'm sorry!" She mouthed silently to him. You were completely oblivious to the mimed conversation between the two as you walked in front of them.

>>>

"Lookin' sweet today, kitten." Harry's voice from behind you made you jump in your skin. Your hand over your chest like that would somehow stop your nerves.

"What's got you all dressed up?" Florence asked as they both stood in front of you on set. 

Your hands fiddled with the tight black lace top you had on. It complemented your bust so well but it made you feel awkward and out of place, like everyone's eyes were on you. Plus the pants that hugged your ass tighter than cling wrap weren't helping with the shameless stares from people.

"Is- is it too much?" Your words stumbled over themselves as your face heated.

Maybe this was a bad idea.

"Yeh look gorgeous like always." A slight frown danced on his lips as he looked down towards you. He could tell something was up by your anxious movements. Your eyes flickering around the studio like you were constantly on the lookout for someone.

"Okay," you sighed, your hand running over your hair as you tried to calm yourself down. "You guys know the sound technician, James?"

Their faces solidified to stone at your words. Both of them rigid as they looked at you. Not a hint of emotion detectable in their expressions.

"He asked me out." You felt uneasy, unsure of the decision to go to lunch with him. You felt like you were going to die in a ball of nerves at any second. This was exactly why you didn't date.

Sure, you'd gone on a date here or there. Mostly when your very small friend group got tired of you third wheeling at all the couples activities. You'd then be set up with someone, it wouldn't work out because you were one shred away from being a nutcase, and that would be the end of it.

"You can't go out with him!" Florence said shrilly, her eyes widened as the words came out of her mouth.

"Why?" You asked, eyes glancing over to the guy in question.

"He uh- he uh," she stammered, her hand slapped Harry against his chest twice for him to answer for her.

"He sniffs people!" His words rushed out of his mouth. Your eyebrows scrunched together.

"What?" You asked, as Florence hand rubbed the temple of her head before shooting a deathly glance at Harry.

"Yeah, Harry, what?" She asked, obviously annoyed but you weren't sure why. It wasn't like she was about to go on a date with the guy.

"I saw him. He likes to, uhm, yeh know." Harry looked at the ground before his hands shoved into his pockets. "He sniffs peoples hair."

"Wow," your hopes of going on a date that didn't involve cheap beer and 25 cent chicken wings suddenly blew up into flames. "Well, thanks for telling me."

"It's okay, Y/N, we'll go out to lunch." Florence said softly, her hand in yours as she gidded you off the set.

"Thanks guys." You smiled softly, head rested against Harry's chest as you three walked.

>>>

"We've got to tell her." Florence spoke quietly as she snuggled into Harry's side. His duvet wrapped tightly around the both of them in his oversized bed.

"I don't know.." He glanced at the fallen face of his girlfriend. "This all could backfire and then she won't even want to be friends."

"But, things don't feel right. It's like she's our missing piece." Her bottom lip started to tremble, corners of her eyes held onto tears that she refused to let fall. 

"I know, I feel it too." He sighed as he laid back on his pillow. Looking up at the ceiling. A large feeling grew in his stomach, despair. You didn't seem like the type who dated adventurously or tried different things in your life. 

He wanted you. God, how they both wanted you. You, their missing piece. Your presence made the both of them feel that indescribable warmth of home in their chest. Your laugh, your smile, your terrible sense of humor, and the way you had no idea just how desirable you really were.

"One of us should make a move on her." Florence said, finally breaking the silence between the two of them.

"Think?"

"Think it'll be the only way to know for sure if she likes one of us or not."

>>>

That Friday morning started like all the other mornings since you'd been on this job. A new mystery cup of tea in your hands that Harry had brought for you that morning. Their makeup was done long ago but now they hid out in your trailer until some intern was forced to go and find them. 

This had been your three's new morning routine for the past three weeks and surprisingly, you weren't bothered by having your quiet time interrupted by them. You were actually starting to look forward to these morning's. 

"Do you want to come to dinner with us tonight?" Florence asked you from her spot on the love seat. Your head lifted from the trashy magazine you were mindlessly flipping through on the floor. You chuckled as you shook your head at her, turning back to the obvious lies written in ink.

"We won't make yeh eat anythin' weird, kitten." Harry smiled easily when he moved off the couch to sit by you. His arm around your shoulders when you looked up in disbelief. 

"I could pick the place." You suggested a cheeky smug smirk across your face when they both looked like you'd asked them for a kidney. "See, I knew you two wanted to eat somewhere gross!"

"You always want tacos!" Florence groaned flinging herself against the now unoccupied side of the couch that Harry previously sat at. A pout on her face as she tried to get you to change your mind.

"I do not." You scoffed. Okay, maybe you did but still those two could use a real meal or two.

"What if we do food and a movie at mine?" Harry asked, interrupting yours and Florence's teasing back and forth.

"Yes!" She agreed eagerly, her bright eyes filled with excitement and you knew you couldn't say no even if you wanted to.

>>>

You had to admit, you were fucking nervous to go to Harry's house. The neighborhood your old Camero chugged through was definitely not like your neighborhood at all. It was all fancy houses, nice lawns, and security everywhere. You felt like you were a step away from breaking into the pentagon when you rolled up to the gate for the guard to let you in.

You stood anxiously on his front step. The 6 pack of Coors Light seemed like such a bad choice now. You mentally cursed yourself for being so stupid, how could you think someone who lived here would be okay with your cheap beer? You were four seconds away from faking a stomach ache and going home to your hole of an apartment when the door opened. Harry's smiling face with that cute little dimple popping out stared at you looking so out of place.

"Don't gotta be nervous, yeh know?" He asked when he took your hand in his, pulling you into the house.

"Well, you did say you two would bite." You crack a smile at his bark of a laugh. Nerves easily washing off you when you made it into his living room. 

"Where's Flor?" You asked, eyebrows raised when you turned to him.

It wasn't that you minded being one-on-one with Harry. You two got along great but you figured the blonde would be here already, the two of them seemed inseparable.

"On her way." He shrugged, his ass hitting the seat of the couch, motioning for you to do the same.

"What're we going to watch?" You asked as you sat down beside him, his arm around you when sat back from placing the beer down on the floor.

"Anythin' yeh want." He said, his eyes trained on you as you wracked your brain for a film those two would watch with you without complaining.

"Only watch horror." 

"No way, nope. Not watchin' a scary movie. Yeh'll never sleep." He joked, his arm tighter around you as he pulled you into his chest. 

"Not sleeping here so it's not gonna be your problem." You poked back, your head leaning against him. God, he smelled amazing.

"Sure yeh are. Got beer with yeh, can't drive drunk, kitten." His fingers lifted your chin when he spoke to you. Your eyes meeting his briefly before they flickered to his lips.

Have they always looked that good? Or was the intoxicating scent of his cologne making you drunk on him? 

You couldn't tell and honestly, you could care less what the reason was when his face seemed to inch closer to you. He was going to kiss you, you realized. Your breathing seem to halt in your throat when he was millimeters away from you. His nose pressed lightly to yours, setting your soul on fire. 

Your stomach turned and flopped, that familiar chill of desire ran down your spine all the way to your core. Your hands wanted to grip onto him, kiss him with a passion when the doorbell rang.

You jumped in your skin. Your body jerked back from him. Your big round doe-eyes staring blankly into his face. He groaned, eyes squeezed shut, resting his forehead against yours.

"She's got the worst timin'." He muttered before getting up from the couch to answer the door. The breath you'd been holding in released when he left the room.

Did you really about kiss your friend? And not only was he a friend, he was a coworker. You groaned, hands covered your face as it burned in embarrassment. What the hell were you thinking? You knew better than to ever mix business and feelings, especially when it came to famous people.

Florence entering the room with her sweet smile put a stop to your insanely degrading thoughts. You'd simply just pretend this never happened. Push it to the back of your mind and forget it, yeah that would be the solution.

>>>

"Why do we gotta watch this scary shit?" Florence asked, her hands covering her eyes as Jason stalked through the forest after innocent teenagers.

"You've literally acted in horror movies." You smiled at her glare she shot at you. Her head laid on your shoulder as she whined loudly. Harry sat on the other side of her, his hand rested on her thigh.

You had no idea how to even begin to feel about that. An hour ago he was trying to kiss you and now he was rubbing her thigh. You didn't understand but refused to acknowledge the fact that the kiss almost even happened.

There was definitely tension between the three of you, awkward feelings floating in the air around his oversized living room. You tried your best to shove it down, to ignore whatever happened with you and Harry, especially since Florence was here and you had no idea what she would think.

"Let's take shots." She said as she flipped off the TV right as Jason's machete swung wildly through the air towards screaming teenagers.

"Trying to get us drunk?" Harry chuckled as he stood and walked to the kitchen. That smile on his face that could melt hearts.

"Duh. You two are being weird." She said as she eyed you up. Your face heating so much you swore you'd burst into flames. "You okay?"

"Yeah, just you know, stupid stuff." You waved your hand, dismissing her question. An unbelieving hum coming from her as Harry came back in with a bottle of tequila and shot glasses.

"Oh fuck," you groaned at the sight of the bottle, your old enemy that made you say the dumbest shit glared back at you.

"Gonna be able to keep up, kitty?" Harry asked as he sat down a full shot glass in front of you on his coffee table. 

You wished you'd been the type of person who was smart enough to see a bad idea staring you in the face.

You were not that person.

The shot stung and burned your throat the whole way down your throat. The potent liquid turned your stomach into knots whenever it hit the acid there.

Maybe you'd regret this tomorrow morning but it'd make one hell of a story.

>>>

"Yeh never dated?" Harry asked, the upper half of his body swayed back and forth as he sat crossed legged on the floor of his living room. 

"Nope." You answered back before shooting what had to be shot number 10 down your throat. The once burning drink now felt like water when it went down.

"Wait, are you a virgin?" Florence asked, her eyes wide as she stared at you. The serious look on her face made you bust out laughing.

"I'm not a virgin. I just don't date."

"But you're so pretty. Anyone would date you." Florence said, her hand brushing back the hair from your forehead that was beading alcohol induced sweat.

"Don't have the time. Always busy." You said with a sigh. Sure, you wanted to date but your working schedule made it impossible. You couldn't even have a cat you were so busy and you fucking loved cats.

"Ever date more than one person at the same time?" Harry asked when he looked up from his shot that sat in front of him. Testing the waters, he thought, if you said you'd never do that at least you'd be likely to not remember the next day.

"Nah." You shrugged, completely missing the look Florence shot Harry's way. A warning to not push the subject.

"Y'could." He suggested as the warm feeling of sleep started to surround your body. Your eyes feeling more and more heavy by the second.

"That means two people would actually have to like me." You gave a short laugh. Your eyes closing, head falling back to lay on the couch. You'd only rest them for a second, you thought.

"We like you." Florence said quietly from beside you. Her statement being answered with your soft snores.

"She's never gonna agree to it." Harry mumbled, the shot in front of him finally being thrown to the back of his throat.

"But-" Florence started, her hands running over your hair. "I don't know, Harry. I just like her so much. Things feel right when she's around."

"I know, sweetheart." He said as he stood from his spot. His arms encircled you, picking you up as Florence stood from her spot on the floor. The two of them and the passed out you made your way to his room. The big plush bed you would have loved was soft under your body. Your hands closed around the pillow under your head.

"I wanna keep her." Florence said as she laid down beside you. Her hand rested over yours as Harry climbed into bed on the other side of you. 

"M'too but I think I scared her when I tried to kiss her." He said quietly, the both of them speaking in whispers over top of you.

Florence sighed, her lips pouting as she stared at your resting face. She knew weeks ago she liked you. Knew from the moment you laughed wholeheartedly at her terrible jokes that she wanted you. The same gleam bounced in Harry's eyes whenever he looked at you but you never noticed. 

You never took any of their flirting seriously. Never paid a second thought to them asking you out or trying to take you to nice places. 

It made a bit more sense to them now that they knew you never dated but how the hell could you not pick up on their shameless flirtation? Harry called you kitten for God's sake.

"Jus' gonna 'ave to be blunt." Harry said a while later. The both of them doing nothing else but listening to your soft snores.

"Tomorrow?"

"Yeah, tomorrow."

>>>

You woke up the next morning to a pounding in your head. Your eyes barely saw anything through the foggy vision of your sleepy eyes. You swallowed down that dry feeling in your throat - water, you needed water.

You groaned softly as you pushed yourself up from the bed that wasn't your own. You knew you'd end up crashing the night at Harry's but you didn't expect to end up in the same bed with him, with both of them.

You figured that was honestly better than you and Harry alone in the bed together, at least you know you didn't do anything with Florence laying next to you two. 

You slipped out of bed, easily. The both of them didn't move a muscle as you snuck out of the house and towards your car. Maybe it was rude for you to run off like this but you needed to nurse your hangover at your own place.

You sighed, throwing your phone on your cluttered kitchen table when you finally made it home. The traffic was awful and of course everyone was laying on their horns like that would somehow help the long line of idle cars.

Your head was killing you when you sat in your shower. The water running over you was warm and much-needed. The hangover seemed to wash down the drain with your lavender soap. 

You were calm, in your element, when frantic knocking at your door interrupted your shower. You cursed under your breath, cutting off the water quickly. Hoping it wasn't your elderly neighbor who always seemed to need help moving boxes on Saturday's.

"I'm coming, Ms. Thompson!" You yelled as the knocking grew more frantic. Your bathrobe tightly around you when you opened the door. The both of them looked like a mess of anxiety and worry.

"Uh, hi?" You said with the door barely opened enough for your head to stick out. Water dripping off you collected on the floor at your feet.

"Hi? Seriously?" Florence growled, her usually sweet and calm voice laced with irritation as she crossed her arms over her chest and glared at you.

"Where's yeh phone? We thought you wondered off in the middle of the night or sumthin'. We were bloody worried, Y/N." Harry said as you opened the door for them to come in. 

"It's dead." You gestured to the useless piece of technology sitting on your table. Harry hands ran over his face as he shook his head. Florence's lips pursed as they both looked anywhere but at you.

"Am I missing something?" You finally asked after what felt like hours. "'Cause I feel like I'm being scolded by my parents right now."

"You can't be serious. God, Y/N," Florence fumed in a way you'd never seen before. The confusion in your mind growing larger by the second. "What would we have done if something happened to you?

"Uhhh…" your eyebrows furrowed together as you looked towards Harry for help. You had no idea what the hell you did to make them so worried about you.

"Can yeh sit down?" Harry asked you, his head nodded in a gesture towards your couch. Anxiety crawled through your skin as you walked over to sit on your plain and basic couch.

Harry's hands smoothing down the front of his pants and Florence foot tapping like mad on your floors did nothing to calm your racing mind. All three of you sat in tension on your couch. You were sandwiched between the both of them. Their shoulders pressed tightly against yours and maybe if it was under different circumstances you'd enjoy the close contact.

"We like you." Florence blurted out into the silence of your living room. 

Your widening eyes looked at her in complete disbelief until you burst with laughter. The snorting chuckling sounds died quickly when they both seemed to clam up.

"You're serious?" You asked, both of them seemed too nervous to answer at first. Harry's concerned filled eyes connecting with yours briefly before looking at the ground, his hands, his rings. Anywhere else.

"We do but we get if 's weird fo' yeh. We can just forget it if yeh want us to go back to bein' friends." He rushed out nervously as you let out a breath of air.

"I'm just surprised someone, who doesn't sniff people, likes me." You mumbled, hand pushing back your damp hair out of your face. Harry's snort of a laugh and a shake of his head had your eyebrows pulled together before Florence called your attention again with her nerve wrecked voice.

"I can't believe you didn't notice." Her hands fiddled together with nerves. "We kept asking you out."

"I'm a bit dense." You said with a short laugh.

"Whaddya say?" Harry asked as he took his hand in yours. Florence doing the same with the other. Flutters in your stomach blossomed at their touch. One hand, soft and silky like satin, the other, rough and calloused at the tips but smooth towards the palm.

You swallowed the nerves down. Your mind filled with so many doubts, so many thoughts all at the same time. Anxiousness mixed with excitement. It was new, different, and you had so many questions.

"How- how would this work?" You asked, both sets of eyes brightening at your words.

"How ever you want." Florence rushed out. The prospect of you actually considering this had her heart racing almost out of her chest. Really, she'd agree to anything you wanted as long as it included you three being exclusive.

"We… just date?" You asked, your brows furrowed as you stared at your hands. Your mind trying to turn out the logistics was going to drive you absolutely insane.

"Well, yes but y'know… the three of us." Harry gestured to the three of you.

"Won't someone get jealous?" You asked him, your head tilted to the side as you watched his lips purse in consideration.

"Guess if one of us gets jealous we gotta talk 'bout it. Work it out." He said, Florence nodding her head in agreement from beside you.

"And.." you started to get nervous about your next question, the one that had been blaring in your mind since this conversation started. "The sex?"

"Already tryin' to bed us, kitten?" Harry joked as Florence shot him a glare. Your face heated and eyes widened, maybe this was a bad idea, you were already about to die from embarrassment.

"Shut up." She whispered yelled from beside you like you wouldn't be able to hear it. Harry's eyes rolled in his head that smug smirk on his face.

"We don't have to talk about that for a while if you don't want to. We can figure it out later." Florence said softly from beside you. Her hand taking yours again, her thumb ran soothing circles against the back of it.

You shrugged, your lip between your teeth as you thought about what it'd be like to have both of them. A familiar heat worked up in the bottom of your stomach.

God, even just picturing it was getting you started. You could only imagine what it'd be like when it actually happened.

"The little minx." Harry laughed as he leaned up to look at you the thoughts you were thinking clearly wrote across your face. "Think she wants t'give it a try before settling on an answer, Flor."

"Hmm," she hummed from beside you, a smile cracked on her face as she brushed the damp hair off your shoulder. "Think she needs some more convincing?"

"Yeah, looks like it to me." Harry words floated over you, through the air above you. Your mind tried to desperately grab at the words, make sense of them, but it was useless. You were already gone at the mere prospect of the rest of the day's events.

"Can I kiss you?" Her word brought you down to earth but only barely. 

Her plush lips made you forget how sentences form or words could be spoken in the English language when they hesitantly met yours. They were soft, not demanding to take control. She let you come to her. Let you set the pace that you were comfortable with.

Your hand slid to the back of her neck, pulling her addictive gently touch harder into you. A heavenly sounded moan slid from her mouth when your tongue slipped its way in. You could have gotten lost in the way you moved so insync with each other when she pulled back.

Your deep breathing and closed eyes made her grin widely. Maybe you would be okay with this arrangement. 

Harry's hand in yours again got your attention. Eyes snapped open to see the pretty blonde in front of you smiling smugly.

"Can I kiss yeh?" His thick accent somehow sounded richer in this moment. Your head turned to the other side to see his usually bright green eyes darken with lust. The sight of him like that could keep you satisfied for a month, maybe longer. 

"Yes." You barely had the word out of your mouth when his lips pressed forcefully to yours. Demanding movements of his mouth led you in the kiss, determined hands grabbed your hips to lift you onto his lap. The sudden movement through you off balance. Your ass hitting his very prominent boner made you moan.

Holy shit, how the hell were you supposed to handle all of that?

You whimpered as he pulled you back from him. His hands running under the robe to your unclothed ass. His calloused fingers felt rough against your skin as he groaned, his head against the back of the couch as Florence moved over beside you two.

"We can stop 'ere." Harry said through gritted teeth when your hips moved over his, chasing the feeling of his retreating hands.

Florence hummed her agreement as you sat back fully on Harry's lap. Your mind ran circled around you. The last thing you were thinking right now was quitting this.

"I want to see you kiss." You said through your nerves both their wide eyes blinked up at you. Not thinking you'd be wanting to go any further. 

Florence acted quickly, her hands on either one of Harry's cheeks as she pulled his lips to hers. The two of them were obviously familiar with the other. They'd been doing this for a while, you assumed.

Whatever worries you had about being jealous or not liking the three of you together all at one time quickly went out the window. They were fucking hot together. The sight of them wrestling for the lead sent a flood of arousal straight to your core. Your hips grinding against Harry's lap, desperate for any friction. 

"Think we got her answer." Harry mumbled into Florence's mouth, a smile on his lips as she laughed. Your face heated as she faced you with that sweet smile.

"We better make sure she doesn't change her mind then."

>>>

It was an absolute mess of limbs as you three rushed to the bedroom. Lips against lips, tongues sliding against one another's to a point you weren't sure where Harry started and Florence ended. 

"Gonna make yeh feel so good, princess." Harry's deep voice vibrated against you. His lips pressed tightly to your ear, turned upwards at the corners in a sinful smile. His hands gripped the back of your legs tighter, bringing them closer to God and you further and further away from ever having a front row ticket to the pearly gates. 

If this was why you went to hell, it'd be fucking worth it.

Her teeth grazed the inside of your bare thighs. Just enough to get your attention back to her pretty head of blonde hair between your legs. Harry's head against your shoulder as he watched her work you into an absolute mess of whines and she hadn't even done anything yet.

"So sensitive, baby." She smiled against your skin. Her perfect white teeth biting a bit harder into you before sucking the flesh of your inner thigh into her mouth. Marking you as theirs. 

You whimpered, head against Harry's shoulder as your fingers dug deep into his forearms that were holding your legs open for Florence. His throbbing erection leaking a river against your ass every time you squirmed in place. 

Hot breath fanned against your core. Her dainty fingers ran through your exposed folds and maybe, if you had more shame, you would have held back the pornographic moan that came from you. But you couldn't help it, they'd been absolutely teasing you relentlessly. Wanting to see how you ticked.

"Please, fuck," your hoarse voice cracked as you looked down at her. She was laid on her stomach arms crossed in front of her as she shamelessly studied you. "Flor, please."

"We're getting there." She mumbled, her fingers stopped their movements, one finger slipped into your absolutely dripping pussy. 

"Fuck." Harry breathed out as another moan fell from you. A subtle shift from his hips had another wet spot starting on your back.

"She's soaked, Harry." Florence held up her fingers that were doused in you up for him to inspect. A hum coming from him as he kissed against your neck that was littered with marks he'd left.

"Think y'can give us that answer now, pretty girl?" He smiled at your defiant 'humph', you were going to be so much fun to tease. "Come on, wanna hear y'say it. Then, yeh can get what y'want." 

You debated it for a second, your pride or your relief.

"I wanna be your girlfriend." You mumbled through nerves. Never one to be vocal during sex wasn't going to be an option with them. 

"Didn't hear yeh."

"Fuck," you groaned, face heating to blazing temperatures you didn't know existed outside of the sun. "I want to be your two's girlfriend!"

"No need to yell, baby." Florence said with a smug smile up to you. 

"You both ca--" you started to tell them both to shove off when her tongue finally, finally, ran across your swollen clit. 

You swore your eyes actually rolled back in your head.

"Told yeh we'd give yeh what you wanted." That smug smirk on his face as he watched you starting to fall apart.

Her tongue was flat and thick against your folds. Wild and untamed in it's adventures to find all the spots that made your toes curl. Her moans from your taste echoed through you.

"Holy shit," she breathed out, her mouth disconnected from you only briefly. Her thumb pressed on your clit, rubbing lightly. "Gotta taste her for yourself."

"Will after yeh finish. Don't wanna hog her all to m'self." 

You felt like you were going to explode. Here there were, casually talking about you like you weren't even there. It was so fucking hot.

Her hands grasped onto Harry's thighs as her whole face practically buried itself into your core. You'd been eaten out before, but not like this.

Her tongue switched so effortlessly between slow, thick, long, strides to quick, tight, circles on your throbbing bundle of nerve endings. She seemed to be a step away from reading your mind. Two fingers pushing into you right when you needed them the most.

"Gonna cum, pup?" Harry grunted against your skin. His eyes never left the absolutely sinful scene in front of him. Kisses pressed against your neck, your shoulder, anywhere he could reach.

"Yes, fuck, oh-" your voice carried through your small apartment. So loud, so lustful, you didn't even recognize it was yours at first. Her fingers hitting that spot inside you so perfectly, your tightening walls couldn't take it anymore. 

A release in a way you've never experienced before finally hit you. Your whole body shivered from the force of it. Eyes closed tightly, head against Harry's shoulder. It was so good it almost hurt.

When you finally started to surface from that hazy feeling of pure bliss you were being lowered onto the bed. Your legs that had been held open for so long ached and throbbed but it was so fucking worth it.

"Think y'can handle another one?" Harry smiled down to you as he hovered over the bed. Florence settling beside you, her hand over your hair to calm you down.

"Yeah." You barely breathed out, eyes connected with hers briefly. How the hell could someone look so sweet and adorable after wrecking you? 

You hummed, head leaning up to give her a kiss. Lips connected with hers as you reached for Harry's hand. His cool rings relieved the burning hot skin of your hands as you pulled him to your guys level. 

His lips replaced hers against yours. His hands taking time to explore the curves of your body, your chest. Fingers dancing against your budded nipples. Your overly sensitive body was aching for another release as you moaned into his smirking mouth. His hand kneading your flesh in brand new ways.

"Ass up, sweetheart." His cocky tone of voice had your heart beat picking right back up as you turned over onto your knees. You rested on your elbows, hand motioning for Florence to lay in front of you. Her eyes widened as she stared you down.

"Well, don't be shy." You smiled as she crawled over to you, her legs laid open on the bed as your arms wrapped around her thighs.

"Just, just, surprised this is happening." Her words stumbled out as your tongue started to explore her folds the way hers had done. Gently soft pressure against her core, hardly enough to taste her, teasing.

Payback for them taunting you in the beginning. 

Her breathing caught in her throat, her elbows barely keeping her upright when you finally got a good taste of her and fuck, was she delicious. You moaned, hands dug into her thighs as your tongue slipped into her tight hole.

You could do this the rest of your fucking life.

Harry's distraction finally broke when Florence's eyes opened again. Green eyes meeting green eyes as her hand tugged your head down harder into her core. His tongue wet his lips before his hand traveled down between your legs, fuckin' hell you were soaking almost down to your knees.

He wanted to be gentle with you, soft, loving. Show you how much he liked you but when you shifted your ass back into him. Wiggling back and forth for him, he couldn't help himself. You little temptress. His hand landed firmly on your ass and what he didn't expect was the full fledged roar of a moan that came from you. His dick twitched from the sound.

"Fuck," your voice muffled by the her silky wet cunt. Her hand lifting your head up just enough to see your eyes as Harry started to slide into your velvet cave. His hand bruising your hip as he cursed under his breath.

"Feel good, H?" Florence wore that smug smile as his lust blown eyes met hers. His snappy comments and witty attitude put at bay by your contracting walls having a hard time keeping up with his girth.

"God, sweet girl, your pussy is fuckin' tight." He thrusted a bit further into your narrow opening, your hands dug deep into Florence's legs as you whimpered. Her hands ran over your hair as she shushed you.

"Oh my g--" you choked out as he finally settled fully in you. His hands pulled the round flesh of your ass back to see where you two were connected. He pulled out only a little just to push slowly back in. His head fall to his chest as your vortex sucked him back in. "Move, please, move."

Your hips only swayed slightly before he was pounding into you. You were thankfully you had a job in front of you to do or else you would have been reaching another orgasm in mere seconds. His length hitting that spot inside of you every single time. 

You had to force yourself to concentrate, to not let your eyes roll back into your head whenever he pumped into you. Your tongue ran circles around her clit, your fingers slid into her easy. Nothing but moans filled your small apartment, your bed creaking from how hard he was thrusting into you.

You felt so sorry for your downstairs neighbors.

Her hand tightened in your hair as his hand tightened around your hip. You were pushed, pulled, tugged, manhandled, and holy fuck was it making your walls clench tighter. Your tongue was more determined than ever to make fast work of getting her off when you felt your fast approaching end over the horizon.

"Oh, oh," she moaned her hips bouncing down on your face as she fucked herself on your tongue and fingers.

"'M close." Harry grunted from behind you, his hand slapping down on your ass again.

You didn’t have the time or capacity to enjoy the stinging pain that went through your body. Tingling sensation all the way through your core when you felt the walls against your fingers start to contract. A wildly erotic moan came from her as Harry's hand reached around to rub fast pace circles on your clit.

Stars danced along your vision as your release hit you. Sloppy thrust of Harry's hips slowed down as a warmth filled you. Overrunning from your puffy, abused, pussy down your legs to the bedspread. Your body collapsed into the open arms of your now girlfriend as Harry leaned over your back.

"Why'd we wait so long to do that?" You asked once your mind cleared from the fog of your two orgasms. Laughs came from in front and behind you. Chaste kisses against whatever available skin was in their reach.

"We could always do it again, love."

[cattles-bians]

exes au part 14

post directory

obsetress:

obsetress: viola

em: holy shit

em: i think viola could hold a truly ridiculous number of things in her hands

em: danis like i have a little fanny pack right here- and violas like (turns up nose) absolutely not

obsetress: pre therapy viola during her relationship w dani: buys dani a birkin too, is like "here baby, so you don't have to use that fanny pack"

obsetress: dani's like "oh. i, um. like my fanny pack"

obsetress: viola therapy era after her relationship with dani: buys her a hermes fanny pack instead

obsetress: jamie rolls her eyes but dani is literally

em: i think a lot abt viola offering solutions completely unprompted n then being really offended when ppl dont take her up on it

em: pre therapy obvs

obsetress: SAME

obsetress: oh link is gross

obsetress: cost is grosser

obsetress: but viola lloyd dropping $2550 on a fanny pack for her ex gf? chefs kiss

---

obsetress: ok just remembered viola slouching or leaning or w/e n like

obsetress: brain practically applying that to exes au and imagining when and where she'd slouch n everyone's reactions to htat

obsetress: bc like she has perfect posture but when she chooses to do it it's a power move

obsetress: and i. hm

em: yeah

obsetress: viola sitting up stock straight when they first get to brunch and as soon as she's ordered her bloody mary shes pulling off her sunglasses and dropping them on the table and just sinking back

em: how to phrase this w/o sounding too much like a whore

em: actually no way to say this but like i feel v strongly abt the way we make women take up less space wrt to knees together calves touching type deal and i think maybe

em: maybe viola can manspread a bit as a treat

em: hate that term but i cant think of a better one

obsetress: nah she does n it's hot

obsetress: just had this image pre divorce of viola and arthur at marriage counseling on opp ends of the couch n arthur's sitting v tight close and vi is just

obsetress: leaning and spreading a lil

obsetress: the first time jamie sees her do it she's so taken aback

obsetress: because she's NOT expecting it

em: jamies like ah ok late in life lesbian deal and then jokes on her viola is fluent in dyke slouch

obsetress: jamie immediately trying to suss out just how long viola has been fucking women

obsetress: she says to dani later "i thought she was all proper like" and dani's like "she is" and jamie's like "so wot was that then" and dani's like "well, people are gay, jamie,"

em: ghfjhgljkJFDASJKKJFGA

em: jamies like so wait how long HAS viola been

obsetress: jamie: so you were vi's first serious girlfriend right? dani: dani: jamie: right???????

em: violas been fucking women longer than jamie has lbr

em: i mean shes clearly only 35, jamie,

obsetress: jamie: so... vi... viola: hm? jamie: you're, uh, gay, right? viola: obviously jamie: right. well dani told me you've been dating women since–– viola: since i was 15, yes jamie: but you married a man

em: violas like u went to jail everyone does stupid shit occasionally

em: jamie: so how long have you been dating women viola: since i was 15 jamie: no i meant like. in years viola raises her eyebrows and jamies just like haha nevermind fuck

obsetress: she tried!

obsetress: she tried

em: jamie on her 35th birthday pencilling 'many happy returns' into violas ????th 35th birthday card

em: yknow i think

em: i think something's afoot

obsetress: jamie, giving up on the direct approach

obsetress: slipping in next to rebecca at the wine bar

obsetress: "becca"

obsetress: "hi, jamie" "hi. how old is your girlfriend"

em: am fucking losing it thinking abt jamie like. realising how much gay energy viola has

em: like taken ABACK

obsetress: fksljfLKSDJFLJ

obsetress: just like

obsetress: why are jamies reactions to viola so funny

obsetress: montage of jamie realizing how much gay energy viola has

obsetress: jamie watching viola sitting

obsetress: jamie watching viola pick up a variety of glasses and mugs

obsetress: jamie watching viola compare hand sizes with dani, jamie's girlfriend and viola's ex girlfriend who she dated for literal years and whose hand size she definitely already knows

em: NOT THE HAND SZIES

em: they go for a walk and viola immediately complains about the sun and jamie's like

em: i have a spare hat but ur not gonna like it

em: its a snapback that says daddy or smthn in gold, owen got it for jamie for her bday, jamie Loathes it

obsetress: BYE

obsetress: viola looks better in it than jamie does

em: jamie has that

em: am i attracted to viola? moment

em: it passses

em: she has already compartmentalised the weird psychosexual power play

em: queen of compartmentalising

obsetress: jamie: had another one of those moments today dani: what moments? jamie: where i thought i might be attracted to vi dani: well, you did let her fuck you... what was it, four? times in one night, so

em: jamie; yeah but like that aside

em: jamie 'thats neither here nor there' taylor

obsetress: she is the queen of compartmentalizing tho

em: i was gonna be like. 'jamies like wait i dont remember saying four' but. i think she would tell dani

em: because the flip of that is dani callin up vi n i dont think she would necessarily

obsetress: i think she would and dani would make her anyway

obsetress: well make her is harsh but

obsetress: dani would very curiously ask in very convincing ways

em: lovingly coax it out of her

em: dani: what if i fucked you four times in o

obsetress: dani: let me do five

em: viola probably wears so many rings jamie doesn’t even clock the ever present thumb ring

obsetress: jamie just. writes it all off

em: am laughing abt like. viola v meticulously taking off every single ring and putting it in its proper location before...

obsetress: there is something. so hot about that

obsetress: im gonna scream i think

em: i was just meming and now im thinking abt it and

em: truly played myself

em: actually this is me refusing to unpack whatever the hell theo crain gloves made me feel

obsetress: sdkfmsldjfa

obsetress: fair

em: sublimate it into rings

obsetress: i just like um

obsetress: thinkin about when she and dani are together and like

obsetress: it's intentional and everything has its place but vi also makes a show out of it

obsetress: and like

obsetress: she's SO painstaking about it and definitely makes dani wait a little bit and

em: helps dani outta her big ass earrings

em: i mean dani doesnt even Need the help

em: viola meticulous lloyd

em: i mean she just wears so much goddamn jewellry

obsetress: she can tell when dani's getting impatient and goes even slower

em: viola has like

em: viola is one of thos ppl thats really into expensive watches

obsetress: !!!!!!

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: nice lil canon nod too

em: she drags dani to antique auctions n danis like i cant. actually tell the difference between the real and the forgery and violas like (passionately explains it for like 30 minutes) and dani is

em: like shes mentally checked out but also v intensely watching violas hands as she points to the parts of the watch

em: rebecca gets it tho

em: rebecca Gets It

obsetress: dani shoving vi into the bathroom at the auction house and tugging vi's hand between her legs v rebecca grabbing her own auction paddle and bidding against viola for the same watch

obsetress: (rebecca n vi fuck in the car on the ride home)

em: dani grabs a paddle n mimes spanking viola n then the auctioneer is like '$250 to 201' and danis like aw Fcuk

em: violas like i cant take u Anywhere

obsetress: dani gives her the 🥺😌and viola's immediately over it and pulling out $250

obsetress: dani: i didn't even want it, i was just–– vi: i know dani: what am i even gonna do with a–– vi: i'll sell it for $500 at a private auction next week dani: so technically i'm making you money dani, grinning: it's like i'm your employee dani: do you have any more assignments for me, boss? vi: dani get your hand out of my pocket i need to focu––

[crowkingwrites]

Oh It’s You (Part One)

Pairing: Ramsay Bolton/Reader

Words: 1398

Fic Request: OMG, I sort of was inspired by Felicity Smoak from Arrow, but can you maybe do Ramsay x Reader, where they're dating and that kind of stuff and everything is great exept they don't know about each others secret lives: Ramsay is a leader of an assasin group and Reader is the leader of international hacker group. And when Ramsay need hacker's help he goes to her group and they find out about each other. And Ramsay being incredibly impressed by her. Thank you ^^

Ao3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14312856/chapters/33024345

Twilight illuminated the city while couples gathered to romantic restaurants and bars for the night. You ran as fast as you could towards Thirsty Lion, a pub where you and your boyfriend frequented. You ran past the door and found him sitting by himself at your usual table.

“Oh my god, I am so sorry!” you told him. You sat down, catching your breath. Your boyfriend reached out for your hand squeezed it.

“Don’t worry about it,” Ramsay casually said. “I know it’s not your fault. I see you’re wearing our team’s shirt.” He smiled nodding at the new baseball tee he bought you a couple of weeks ago.

“I know it’s not my fault, but I’m still late.”

“If you think I’m going to be upset at you for being late than I must be a pretty awful boyfriend. C’mere, will you?” Ramsay’s hand reached to you and grabbed the bottom of your shirt. He guided you to your seat next to him while wrapping that same arm around your shoulders.

“Did you put in our order for drinks yet?”

“Yeah,” Ramsay said while watching the big screen television. “Waitress came by and I gave her our usual. Stout for me, cider for you.” You took out your phone and ‘checked in’ on Facebook, letting everyone know where you and your boyfriend were.

Your relationship with the infamous Bolton Bastard started with a couple of drinks, a dare, and weirdly enough a Denny’s parking lot at 4AM.

Margaery Tyrell, a close friend of yours, was getting married to Robb Stark. She had asked you to be one of her bridesmaids and you couldn’t be more excited for her. The whole process of picking out a dress, spending time with her and the other bridesmaids, and helping with planning made you so happy.

That’s why when you heard that Margie and Robb were combining their bachelor’s and bachelorette’s parties, you were ecstatic. All of the wedding party was present at The Thieves’ Room and you took your spot among everyone there: Sansa Stark, Theon Greyjoy, and even Jon who you haven’t seen since high school.

Drinks flowed and the games started. “Theon, if you can’t get that girls’ number, you have to drink an entire shot of this hot sauce!” Robb laughed.

“Wot?” Theon said in-between bites of a burger he’d been eating all night. “No! She’s out of my league and I can’t handle hot sauce!” Robb rolled his eyes and pushed him towards the beautiful redhead. Theon wiped his hands on his pants before saying hello to the girl. You couldn’t see what was said, but the next thing you knew you watched the redhead slap Theon so hard he could two steps back. Everyone sounded off with a resounding “ooo” at him. Theon retreated back to his seat and Robb placed the hot sauce in his hand. Theon took a swig of the hot sauce and began choking. Everyone started to laugh at his expense.

“Alright, my turn! After that rejection, we need some real entertainment!” Margie raised her hand excitedly. She looked at you directly. At this point, you were drunk and excited to do anything she asked you. Margie smiled wickedly before unleashing her dare on you. “I want you to make out with…Ramsay.”

Ramsay finished his whiskey and smirked at you. He pushed his chair out slightly and patted his knee. “C’mere, Y/N. Let’s giv’em a show.”

You giggled while you made your way to his lap. Your lips met his while he held you in his lap. Ramsay put his tongue in your mouth first giving him dominance, and you never felt turned on in your life. You heard whoops and whistles from the wedding party.

“Alright! Now that’s what I’m talking about!” Margie called out to the both of you. “Get these two more drinks!” The night became a blur after that. You remembered three things: laughing at Theon again after a failed attempt of hitting on his sister’s ex, you rarely leaving Ramsay’s strong lap and his hands on your hips, and the jarring memory of you throwing up your meal at Denny’s.

You held onto a car while orange juice expelled out of you onto the almost empty parking lot. It burned your throat and went up your nose.

“I’m never drinking again,” you mumbled.

“That’s a shame. I like you drunk,” Ramsay told you, car keys in hand.

“I’m not liking you right now at all,” you threw up again. You swore you saw chunks of pancakes. And maybe blueberries? But you didn’t remember eating blueberries. Ramsay spoke something under his breath. “What did you just say?”

“I was just curious about something.” You stood up and faced him.

“What were you curious about?” Ramsay placed another kiss on you and then he backed away with a smile. “What the hell was that?”

“Pretty and drunk, you’re a great kisser and now—

“And now?”

“Sobering up, still tipsy, still pretty, you’re still a good kisser,” Ramsay chuckled.

“I just threw up and you think I’m a pretty girl who’s good at kissing?” You leaned against the car. Ramsay steadied you with his right hand on your waist.

“I didn’t say I was into normal girls,” Ramsay closed in on you. “I do tend to like my girls interesting.” After that night, the wedding went off with a hitch and so did your new relationship with Ramsay. Some friends were excited for the both of you. Other friends were concerned such as Theon who swore on several books that Ramsay was nothing but bad news.

Ramsay never hurt you, lied to you, or even so much as roughed up any kind of sex. Ramsay was like any other normal boyfriend. He had a boring job. He paid his bills. He liked rock music and laughed at you when you were being silly.

He sipped from his beer and continued to watch the baseball game; his arm was still around you. It had been seven and a half months, and you loved him. You smiled up at him.

“Hm?” Ramsay said.

“Nothing, just I love you a lot,” you kissed his cheek. Ramsay smirked.

“Shame, I only like you.” You scoffed and punched him in his arm. He laughed and kissed your head. “I love you too. Can I talk to you about something actually?”

You put down your cider, looking at Ramsay with concern. “Yeah, what’s wrong?”

“I was at work today and someone was going on and on about how nice everything is because he lives with his girlfriend now. How clean the place is, how much sex he’s having. I got really annoyed by it all. Really annoyed. Then I realized, I could do that. I could have the same thing. So what do you think?”

“What do I think about what?”

“About us living together? Do you want to move in together?” Ramsay asked you. He patiently waited while finishing his stout beer.

“Really? You want to do that?” you said.

“Yeah, I really do. I think we’re ready,” he smiled at you. He squeezed your hand. “I want to wake up to your face every morning and then proceed to fuck you silly before your feet hit the ground.”

“That’s perverted,” you laughed.

“So is your ‘daddy’ kink,” Ramsay winked. You rolled your eyes. Your smart watch beeped an alarm at you, displaying the message ‘911’. Ramsay groaned.

“Do you have to?”

“I’m sorry, baby,” you apologized, gathering your things. “Work has been really hectic. I have to.” Ramsay nodded. You kissed him goodbye before speeding out the door. You grabbed out your cell phone and began calling your workplace. The phone dialed and someone answered.

“Y/N, please don’t get mad.”

“This better be good or so help me I will hire an entire group of assassins to kill you all and hire your replacements,” your voice changed completely. You stormed down the street to your parked car.

“You don’t need to! An assassin group has been hired!” the person joked.

“What?”

“Sorry, bad joke. I mean, that assassin group that did the Italian job two months ago? They need our help.”

“I have no idea who you’re talking about. I don’t look over stupid details like the Italian job. I’m your boss remember? Which assassin group are you talking about?”

“Them. The Turncoats.”

Taglist: @angelicshinigami @sugarwastaken @carilov09 @sleepylunarwolf @i-theredqueen @whatshernamemaria

[theunemployedrogue]

Smooth [Shance ficlet]

A late entry for day four of @shancefluffweek: First/Last

Modern AU. Lance’s first meeting with Shiro doesn’t go as planned -- it turns out so much better than he expected.

“Wait! Wait, I’ve got another one. ‘Hey baby, are you an astronaut? Because that bod is out of this world’.”

Lance flashed his friends a smug grin, waiting for them to declare him the utter genius that he was.

“That was the worst one yet,” said Pidge, not even looking up from her phone.

“Hmm,” Hunk said, thoughtfully tapping at his chin. “I dunno, man. There are plenty of astronauts on Earth. You can’t just assume people will know you’re talking about the ones up in space. I mean, wouldn’t ‘hey baby, are you an alien’ make more sense? Though actually...there might be aliens on Earth too, so...”

Lance groaned and rolled his eyes as Hunk continued to ramble to himself. His brilliant wit and irresistible charm were entirely wasted on his friends.

“Geez Hunk, maybe I should just be like, ‘Hi, I’m Lance. Are you single and interested in men? Because if so, I’d like to take you on a date some time’.”

“I’m game,” came an unfamiliar male voice from behind him.

Lance whipped around, prepared to tell whoever was mocking him to fuck right off, but he immediately abandoned that idea when he saw who’d spoken.

It was him. Takashi Shirogane -- or Shiro, as he liked to be called -- Keith’s stupidly hot best friend that Lance had been Facebook-stalking for like two years. Lance had never had a chance to actually meet him in person due to the fact he’d been deployed overseas for a while. He’d bugged Keith about introducing them once Shiro returned, but figured he’d have at least a couple more years to buff up and get cool before their destined first meeting.

But fate was a cruel mistress, apparently. Here he was face-to-face with Shiro way ahead of schedule, still scrawny, still lame, and wearing a t-shirt with a cat sitting on a slice of pizza in space. 

The absolute demon that had allowed this to happen was standing at Shiro’s side.

“What are you doing here?” Lance snapped at Keith.

“Uh, I work here?” Keith said. “My shift just ended.”

Oh, right. He was even still wearing his Hot Topic name badge. Lance’s brain wasn’t exactly working all that great at the moment.

“Anyways,” said Keith. “I wanted you guys to meet Shiro while he was back in town for a while.”

Shiro smiled and raised his hand in a little wave. The arm was a prosthetic, Lance noted, but it didn’t detract from Shiro’s handsomeness or the aura of strength surrounding him at all.

“You must be...Hunk?” Shiro said, pointing to Hunk. He snapped his fingers in triumph when Hunk gave a nod, then pointed to Pidge. “And you’re Katie, right?”

“Call me Pidge.”

“Pidge, gotcha. Then you must be Lance. Keith’s told me so much about you.”

Lance cut Keith a nasty glare, but snapped out of his vengeful mood just a few seconds later when Shiro barked out a laugh.

“Don’t worry, he had only good things to say.”

“Don’t lie,” Keith muttered, but he didn’t argue any further as he and Shiro took a seat at the table.

Shiro sat across from Lance. He smiled when he noticed Lance staring at him, and Lance quickly averted his gaze, his face flushing red at being caught.

“I like your shirt,” Shiro said.

“Oh, uh, thanks! It’s kinda stupid, I know…”

“No, Shiro honestly loves that kind of shit,” Keith grumbled, rolling his eyes. “Show Lance that dumbass shirt you bought earlier.”

Shiro pulled out a Hot Topic bag and retrieved a white shirt from within. On the front were several kittens and a puppy in cowboy hats with the text “Wot in awwwenation” written beneath them.

“Oh my god, that is amazing,” Lance declared.

“Ugh. I knew you two would get along,” Keith muttered.

Lance found himself chatting with Shiro like an old friend after that. It turned out that Shiro liked a lot of the same things he liked, like memes and action movies, and Lance got so excited about that he forgot to keep his more embarrassing interests to himself. He cringed the minute “mecha anime” left his mouth, thinking surely that would forever seal him as a huge nerd in Shiro’s eyes, but instead Shiro lit up and began gushing about Gundam Wing.

It was so easy to talk to Shiro. Every other word out of his mouth had Lance laughing like an idiot, and Shiro seemed just as amused by the things he said. Lance was so utterly engrossed with their conversation he didn’t even realize how much time they’d spent talking.

“Shiro! Hey, Shiro, we gotta get going!”

Lance looked over to Keith and scowled.

“Come on man, we’re still talking!”

“Lance, we need to leave too. The mall’s closing in ten minutes,” said Pidge.

“Huh?”

Lance took out his cell phone and looked at the time.

“Wha--no way, it was like seven o’clock five minutes ago!”

“You guys have been nerding out nonstop for two hours,” Keith said. He gave Shiro a disapproving grimace, but Shiro just grinned and shrugged in response.

Had it really been two hours?! Had Lance actually talked with such an amazing, gorgeous guy for two straight hours and not completely humiliated himself in the process?

Keith, Pidge, and Hunk gathered their things and started to head for the door. Lance was about to follow when Shiro reached out and gently grabbed his arm to stop him.

“Hey. It was great getting to meet you, Lance.”

“You...you too!” Lance said, blushing. He felt shy again now that he wasn’t totally distracted with talking his head off.

“You mind if I get your number?”

“I uh-- yeah, yeah! Here lemme text you real quick.”

Shiro gave him his number and patiently waited for Lance to text him. Lance’s fingers shook as he swiped out a brief message, and he missed the ‘send’ icon several times before he finally managed to hit it.

“Got it,” Shiro said, lifting his phone when it buzzed. He glanced at Lance’s message and smiled before tucking his phone back in his jacket. “Hey, so I know you were just joking around earlier, but are you actually looking for someone to date at the moment?”

Lance winced. He’d all but forgotten he’d been in the middle of saying the worst pick-up line ever conceived when Shiro first approached them earlier.

“Yeah, sorta…”

“So...are you single and interested in men? Because I’d like to take you on a date some time if you are.”

On one hand, Lance wanted to crawl under the table and die. Not only did Shiro remember the awful pick-up line, he’d just repeated it nearly word-for-word.

On the other hand, holy shit.

“I! I um! Yes, I...yeah, that’s -- yes.” Lance clamped his mouth shut, fearing what nonsense would come out if he kept talking.

“Great! I’ll give you a text tomorrow and we can figure something out.”

They were both sporting flushed faces and nervous smiles as they finally followed after their friends. Lance couldn’t believe Shiro was blushing -- not nearly as much as he was, but damn if it didn’t do things to him knowing he was the cause of that pretty pink color in his cheeks.

Keith had his arms crossed and a knowing look on his face when they came out together. Beside him Pidge was smirking like a devil, and Hunk wore the same soft expression he got whenever he looked at kittens.

“Bye guys. Hope to see you again soon,” Shiro said as he and Keith headed off. Lance raised his hand in farewell, not lowering it until the pair disappeared out of sight.

“Oh my god, I can’t believe it,” Pidge said as soon as they were gone. “Lance actually got a date.”

“I’m so happy for you, buddy!” Hunk exclaimed, tugging Lance into a bear hug and squeezing the life from him before he plopped him back down. “I guess your pick-up lines are pretty good after all!”

Lance decided it was best not to argue with him on that one.

Bonus:

Lance’s shirt  Shiro’s shirt

[cupcakeshakesnake]

Watching World Enough and Time for the first time

Hoo boy

-HOOOO BOI

-THE FINALE IS HERE (the first part of it, that is)

(Spoilers below the cut)

-Oookay snowy place... Kinda feels like the beginning of a Christmas Special (even though it’s still June...)

WHAT

-THE EPISODE BARELY STARTED??

-DOCTOR ARE YOU FAKING AGAIN

-WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR SLEEVE, WHAT CAUSED IT TO BE SO TORN UP

shit, no, really, what happened

NOOOOOOO WHAT

-He’s screaming because he’s turning into Trump

-...sorry.

-And the theme song comes on, without ANY explanation at ALL of what in the HECK just happened.

S t e v e n  mofo M o f f a t

-The name of doom.

? giant spaceship??

W H A T

-Holy shit BBC your CGI really improved

“Hello, I’m Doctor Who.”

“LIES” (from “Flatline”, Series 8)

-”My plucky assistants, thing 1 and... the other one.”

I’m sorry

-No seriously what are you doing Missy

Mary. Frickin. Poppins.

-”But think of the age gap!”

JELLY BABIES

-I’m 110% sure those are jelly babies and if not I will be pissed

Their faces say everything.

-”Well. I am the mysterious adventurer in all of time and space known only as ‘Doctor Who. And these are my... Disposals. Exposition and- comic relief.”

“Iz no an esersise, iz a tepht.” “Are you eating?” “No.”

...Bill’s face. This whole thing. I just can’t.

“ALlllso it’s his real name”

“His WOT”

-Okay so Missy’s probs joking here but what if his name was actually Doctor Who, what if his name was the title of the damn show and it was right in front of us and we never noticed lmao

-”Are you a human?!”  “Don’t be a bitch.”  SHE SAID THE B WORD

-”My name is Doctor Who.”  “It’s not, is it?”  “I like it.”

S H I T

WHATTHEFUCK

-”She’s a murderer!”  “Enjoying your bacon sandwich?”  “Why?”  “Because it had a mummy and a daddy. Go tell a pig about your moral high ground.”

Bill: ‘...stop.’

“ah HAHAw na forget it”

-”Nardole agreed.”  “No I didn’t.”  “He did in my head which is good enough for me.”

“Are you having an emotion?”

“Look at that face, he’s having an emotion!”

“Can I take a selfie with you?”

Don’t know what they’re eating but I’m hungry and that looks tasty

-”She was my man-crush.”  “I’m sorry?”  “Yeah. I think she was a man by then. I’m fairly sure that I was too, it’s a long time ago.”

”We’re the most civilized civilization in the universe. Billions of years beyond your petty human obsessions with gender and associated stereotypes.” “But you still call yourselves Time Lords.” “......Yeah. Shut up.”

-The food looks like salad now

-that was sooo cute aaaa

-”Every star in the universe. We were going to see them all.”

-”But he was too busy burning them.”

“Promise you won’t get me killed.”

Well look at how well that went

I don’t like their synthesized voices at all.

-It reminds me a bit of this.

“Assumption.” “Deduction.” “Hope.” “Faith.” “Idiot.” “Always.”

I can’t believe Missy copied Hagrid

-”Why do you care, Smurf?”

-”If somebody kills you and it’s not me, we’ll both be disappointed.”

-”It’s a matter of time.”

OOOHHHH

-I don’t know shit, but I think I heard that time slows down at the event horizon of a black hole. As in, it seems to slow down to an outside observer.

-And I’m still too stupid to actually connect that information to the episode itself.

-Meanwhile, Bill seems... okay for now.

What the heck.

-The man is disturbing but not disturbing enough to make me go full caps lock and definitely not the most disturbing thing I’ve seen.

WHAT’S WITH THE THING ON HER CHEST

So much fluff

Oh...

-”Pain... Pain... Pain...”

-Pain pain pain pain PAIN PAIN PAIN PAIN PAIN PAIN PAIN PAIN PAIN PAIN--

Sorry but CONVERSION THEATRE?!

-Bill geT THE HELL OUTTA TEHRE

-WHAT IF THEY’RE ACTUALLY PEOPLE SCREAMING IN PAIN BUT THEY LOST THEIR ABILITY TO SPEAK BECAUSE THEY’VE BEEN CONVERTED INTO WALKING TIN CANS AND THE ONLY WAY THEY CAN EXPRESS WHAT THEY’RE FEELING IS REPEATEDLY SAYING “PAIN” IN MONOTONOUS VOICES

Please don’t be a jumpscare, please don’t be a jumpscare...

Okay, so the room with people in beds said IN, Bill’s room said CONVERSION THEATRE (I still don’t get why they call it a theatre/theater; who’s the audience? What’ so theatric about it?) and this room says OUT.

-Which MIGHT mean that the first one is where the humans are kept in custody before conversion, much like a normal hosptal wing (except for the conversion part) then humans are taken to the “Theatre” to have devices implanted on them and whatnot. THEN when they’re successfully converted or about to be so, they’re taken to the OUT room to finish the process... But then what?

Hey they’re using buttons to express their emotions

-World Enough And Time But The Cybermen Talk With Emoji Keypads

-But what if that guy couldn’t find that button at first so he was like “Stay-- (no that’s not it)” “Yes-- (not that)” “Step-- (no no)�� “Pain-- (ah HA)”

AAAAGH I got scared

-I got a scare

OH SHIT

-Trope that scares me the most: Hiding character about to be discovered.

-The guy doesn’t tattle on her though

-They just... muted the device... That guy’s still in pain...

Holy fuck they’re all muted

-I want to say some sophisticated thing about governments pretending there are no complaints by simply muting them.. or something like that

-Bill you don’t have to turn the volume all the way up and risk being discovered

-I feel weird here, because “Kill me” is something I say a lot but there’s a HUGE difference between “Hahahahahaha what am I doing fucking kill me, stop my sinful hands hahaha the government should come to my house and end me look at all this trash i’m drawing ahahahaha this is true art fucking kill me pfftahahahahaha” and "K̺̯̭̻̘̟̎͂͛i̙̖̳͍̮̭̣̍́́l͒͏̮͎̲͖͇͖ͅl̤̜͙͉̘͋̆ͬ̂ͤ͘.̤ͤ̌ͬ͊ͤ͑ͅ.̝̞͕̖̒̑̈̃̔.͓͋̎ͦ̔ͮ̚ ̞͎̻̥̦͕̌ͬ͗ͫ͆̅̚m̳̱̬̞͍͓ͤ̿͂̊̃e̅̀.͉̫̪̰̖͢.̣͍̣̲͉.̡̙͖̥͎̯̜ͅ ̋ͥ͜k̹̳̞̀ȋ̬̖̭͜l̎̿ͬͮ͗͑̀̕l.̍̎.̟͎͇͉̪̳ͅ.̲̼̠ͤͫ̑̆̐̈͘ ̪̣͍͙͕͉̔̈̄́ͤͪ͝m̡̗͔̞̟̲̔̿ͩ̌̽ĕ͚̦̩̥̪̍ͅ.̞̩̫͖̗ͫ̓ͨ̌ͩͥ̽.̴̥͓̦̺̌̇ͬ̈́͂̂͒.͔͕̫̼̾͞ “

-”This way Mr Razor, look sharp!”  Was that pun intended

Floor 1056. huh.

-That’s a whole goddamn city in there

WHAT THE FUCK

-NOPE

-THAT’S A NOPE FROM ME, A NOPE FROM YOU, A NOPE FROM ALL OF US, I AIN’T RHYMING SHIT WITH YOU!

-(...what.)

-”It will help with the horror to come.”  “What horror?”  “Mainly the tea.”

BEHIND YOU BILL

-”Drink it while it is very hot. The pain will disguise the taste.”

-me cooking be like

-Wait, if she’s been here for weeks then the Doctor and the rest of them have been up there all this time?!

-So if the ship’s top is ‘fast’ and bottom is ‘slow’ then the ‘top’ must be closer to the event horizon.

-That explains the date number thing up there.

-So Bill was in here for weeks, maybe months, but only a short time passed up top. Okay.

Thanks Doc, I still kinda needed that cleared up

-”If you’re standing in your garden, your head is travelling faster through time than your feet.”  WHAT

-Okay, I didn’t know THAT, that’s actually new.

-Although I’m not sure if I should go flaunting this new knowledge willy-nilly, seeing as Doctor Who is generally not considered a credible source of scientific facts.

Awwww;; Ahahahahahaha

-”He’s been raising that eyebrow for a week.”  That really puts things into perspective.

-What’s with that woman seriously

-”Don’t change the channel.”  “A week, raising his eyebrow... why would I change?”

I find it kind of cute and sad at the same time that Bill has been watching the Doctor in excruciatingly slow motion for months and hasn’t gotten tired of it

-...Why did the window affect the patients?

“How many more years?”

-wait

-YEARS?!?!

-HOLY SHIT

-...Holy shit...

Just think of seeing that guy’s involuntary backflip for weeks on end

“Wait for me.”

There’s people down here?!!

-Are you saying that city was built by the people who came down here to fix the engine and those people’s descendants

-”Soon we will all be upgraded like them.”

-UPGRADED

-UPGRADED

*TRIGGERED*

dafuq

-Reminds me of the time I pulled a winter cap over my face just because I could.

-And then I put glasses on top.

-It didn’t help. I couldn’t see through the yarn as easily as I’d hoped.

-”That was good.”  “Venusian Akido.”  “I thought you needed four arms for Venusian?”  “I’ve got hidden talents as well as hidden arms.”

Okay, I’m REALLY hungry.

-”When you hug me it hurts my heart.”  “Aw, sweet.”  “No, your chest unit. It digs right in.”

Just brilliant.

He’s wearinf a fucking mask I can’t;;asdaf

JESUS CHRTISY

WHAT THE TABLEFLIPFLAPPING FUCK

-THE GUY WAS A BACKSTABBER

-YOU BITCH

Oh yeah? If it’s so good then why don’t you go upgrade yourselves alrready?

“This won’t stop you feeling pain, but it will stop you caring about it.”

oh yeah that guy totally doesn’t care about his pain

-In fact he looks dead inside

-That actor might as well have been thinking ‘shit, my eye hole slipped and now I can’t see properly.’

-”It fits over your head.”  Yeah I can tell that mister but I don’t want you or that ridiculous pipe thing you got there drilling willy-nilly into my brain

-”But I’m the computer guy, that’s always me.”  “Sorry, she’s cleverer.”  “She’s more evil.”  “Same thing.”

Uh oh

-”Hello, ordinary person. Please maintain a minimum separation of three feet.”

-”I’m really not trying to kill anyone today, but it would be tremendously helpful if your major arteries were out of reach.”

-Annnnnnd now I’m veeeeery suspicious of the scraggly man’s identity as well.

-Like, even more so than before.

same

-“There’s always a scary thing with you isn’t there?”  “Are you only getting that now?”  *Empty Child flashbacks* *Silence in the Library flashbacks* *fucking BLINK FLASHBACKS*  ...yeah I see what you mean.

And here we see another example of BBC’s Photoshop attempts, here used to tamper with stock footage of Earth to create an alien version of it.

-(I know it’s not Photoshop it was a joke)

-Wait.

-IT’S MONDAS ISN’T IT

-Yes I read up on the Doctor Who wiki before and apparently Mondas was a very Earth-like planet, only its people opted to ‘upgrade’ themselves for survival at some point in their history

-Remember kids, if you don’t have time to binge on Classic Who, just read up some long articles in the TARDIS wiki.

WHY IS THAT GUY’S HEAD SO SMALL AND THAT DOOR JUST OPENED BY ITSELF

I have a bad feeling about this

-Oh yes a VERY bad feeling

yep called it (Not really. It was in the trailer.)

-Wow Missy is so salty today

-Not sure if ‘salty’ is the right word... Let’s say ‘verbally homicidal’

-GOD THE SUSPENSE WITH THIS DOUBLE POV’S

-Like, holy fuck, that’s some awesome screenwriting there. Switching between two scenes while maintaining the suspense in both, without making it too fast/all over the place or too long.

-I’m getting chills.

wHAT

-Sheesh, the way his voice changes at the end of that sentence... Jesus.

same

-I’M SCREAMING HOLY FUCK OVER AND OVER AGAIN

-I THOUGHT MISSY WAS GONNA REGENERATE INTO HIM (which is kinda weird) OR MAYBE HE’D BE APPEARING IN A FLASHBACK OR SOMETHING BUT NOOOOO THAT ONE FISHY GUY WAS THE MASTER ALL ALONG

-MOFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT

HOLY FUCK

Is it just me or does the Doctor look really scared here

-Maybe he thought he got rid of them for good hundreds of years ago, and now they’ve come back and they took his friend and it’s all just...?

shit

-SHIT

-NO BILL

-NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

-WE’VE LOST OUT GAY DAUGHTER

I CAN’T

-BELIEVE

-THIS

-IS

-HAPPENING

-THE FOUR BEATS!! WTF!!

no.

oh no.

oh shit.

oh hell no.

shit

-THE FOUR DRUM BEATS.

-AFTER ALL THAT TIME, AFTER 8 YEARS, THEY’VE COME BACK TO HAUNT US AGAIN.

-THAT WAS BACK IN THE RTD ERA OH MY GOD

*SCREAMING*

SDHHSJKSHJKASKJERIHIERHIRGHJSDHJGAGSLDJFAH

-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

...

-FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

HOLY FUCK??

“I did my duty for Queen and country.”

“I waited for you.”

-...

-*cue end credits*

-HOLy sHIT

-THAT DID NOT JUST HAPPEN

-WHAT AN WAY TO END THAT EPISODE

-MOFFAT

-I’M SCREAMING

-I SCREAMED SO LOUD I ALMOST DEAFENED MYSELF

-MOFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!!

[kpopximaginesxscenerios-blog]

Best Friends (Ten Imagine)

genre: angst, and a tiny bit of fluff

Pairing: Ten x Reader

word count: 1,648

AN; So this is my first imagine, and It sucks, I was listening to a bunch of sad music and that’s where the really dramatic ending came from lmao. But yea i hope you like it, please request, idk if I did that whole thing right but please request. Thank youu. *AND IM NOT AGAINST WENDY AT ALL, I LOVE RED VELVET, SHE WAS JUST THE FIRST ONE TO COME TO MIND*

-----------------------------------

I smiled down at my phone as I felt the buzz, notifying me that I got another text message. I gazed down at the phone seeing his name pop up on the screen. Sliding it over so I could read the message from Ten, I felt the butterflies go wild in my stomach.

Ten, is one of my best friends. He has been since we started high school freshmen year. Now, we are fresh out of senior year in high school and I still feel this tingly feeling inside of me when we are even near each other. Or when after he tells a stupid joke and looks at me, giggling expecting me to laugh along. Or the feeling of being important when I am the one he always comes to. If you couldn’t tell, I am in love with my best friend.

When the message open I looked down to see just a simple little text.

Tenny: HEY (Y/N)!!

I felt the side of my mouth curve up as I thought it was so sute that he texted me so excitedly. So I immediately wot back.

(Y/N): hey ten! what’s up?

Ten: I was just wondering if you were free tomorrow to meet up at that little cafe? I have someone that I want you to meet.

I thought about it for a second. Who does he want me to meet? Is it someone I know? Curiously I typed back my reply.

(Y/N): yea sure. who is it?

Ten: It’s a surprise ;) you’ll see

I sighed a little sigh knowing that I was never going to get the answer out of him. I threw my phone on the couch and went to the fridge to get a nice cold water bottle. When I closed the door to the fridge, I smiled a little seeing a picture me and Ten took when we went on a dumb camp trip for a field trip sophomore year. We were both smiling the first time that whole trip after we almost got lost from everyone else on the trip. I laughed to myself and went upstairs to get ready for bed, knowing that tomorrow I was meeting Ten and he was introducing me to one of his friends.

------------

I jumped up to the blaring of my ringtone in my ear and realized after a few seconds that I was getting a call. Without even looking I answered.

“Hello??!?!” I asked slightly annoyed that I was woken up so abruptly.

“Rise and shine (Y/N)!!! It’s a very important day!!!’ I heard the screechy voice that I knew belonged to the one and only Ten.

“Ten! Really you need to call me you couldn't have waited until I just woke up??” Then it hit me, “Wait what time is it?!?! When was I supposed to meet you!? Shit!! Oh god I need to hurry up and get ready and-”

“(Y/N) calm down! It’s not that big of a deal. Jesus. Just be at the cafe in around an hour.” My eyes got huge.

“AN HOUR TEN ARE YOU CRAZY IT’S GOING TO TAKE-” I got cut off yet again by Ten.

“Ok I will see you in an hour! BYE!!” and with that the line dropped. I rolled my eyes slightly while huffing. I went over to my closet and pulled out a pair of skinny jeans and a slightly cropped sweater along with my white converse. I slid into my clothes, after rushing to the bathroom to do my makeup and put my hair in a messy but cute bun.

----------

I just got to the cafe after my tedious walk from these annoying people who apparently forgot how to walk, in front of me. I opened the door of the cafe and immediately looked around for Ten. after realizing that he wasn’t here yet I walked over to the counter to order a drink. I choose a nice and simple hot chocolate.

I was sitting there on my phone just scrolling through twitter when I heard a jingle indicating that someone entered. I looked up and as soon as I did I was met with eyes that I immediately knew belonged to Ten. I smiled, but that soon disappeared when I saw who he was with. Ten was with a girl. Even more precisely Wendy, the bitch from when we were in school. I tried my hardest to fake a smile as the two of them approached me.

“(Y/N)! Hey! I wanted you to meet someone, well that someone is Wendy, she is my girlfriend. And Wendy this is (Y/N) my best friend.” Ten said with one of the biggest smiles I have seen on him in while. I forced a grin on my face as me and Wendy said hello to each other.

“Babe, it looks like (Y/N) already got her drink, do you want me to go order mine and yours?” Ten asked Wendy with a genuine smile. Wendy put on a smile, “Yes baby, please.” She said batting her eyelashes at him. “Awww your so cute I can’t say no to that, no can I. I will be right back.” Ten said as he cupped her cheek, then leaving to order their drinks.

Through this whole moment and interaction, I felt like a ghost. I knew Ten could get anyone that he wanted, I mean look at him, but I didn’t know that he felt about me so lowly to do that to me. I know that he doesn’t know I like him so I guess I cannot really blame anyone but myself. It just felt like a stab in the heart to watch them be so lovey dovey right in front of me when I first found out they were together. I bit my bottom lip to try and hold back my tears.

“So, you and Ten are good friends?” Wendy questioned halfheartedly. I knew she didn’t like me or care to even spare me a glance, she made it obvious.

“Y-yea, we are really good friends, he is my best friend.” I stuttered a little being the first time I was talking from trying to hold back my tears.

“Yes, well, we should really change that. I don’t want Ten wasting his time, on some waste of time and space, so you need to stay away from him. Because if you don’t I swear to god I will make you life living hell everywhere. Understood?” She talked down to me as if I was a dog that did wrong. I was in so much shock that my jaw fell a little.

Ten came back right before I was about to say anything making me close my mouth and just sit there looking down still holding in my tears and anger. “Sorry that took so long, haha, they had to wait for the coffee machine to get going again.” He came back smiling. I kept my head down while he was adjusting himself in his chair.

“(Y/N) are you ok? What’s wrong? Your really quiet.” Ten asked me and I could hear the concern he had in his voice which made what I said next really painful, “Ten I’m fine you don’t have to worry. I’m just a little tired I guess”

“Oh ok.” Ten left it alone, and I could tell that he knew something was wrong. “Mmmm, well, me and (Y/N) get along pretty well, wouldn’t you say (Y/N)?” Wendy looked at me with a slight glare while Ten looked at me with a smile. “Yea, just great.” I said with the most forced smile I could muster up.

Ten gazed at Wendy obviously happy that things were working out for him. The next moment felt like someone came and ripped my heart right out from my chest. Wendy pulled Ten by his jaw and kissed him. I couldn’t help the tiny tears that fell from my eyes seeing someone that I love be kissed by someone else right in front of me. So I did what I could do best. I ran.

I sprinted up out of my seat ignoring the calls that Ten was shouting at me to ask what was wrong, I ignored it all and just sprinted out of the cafe and into the street. I started to run in the direction which was kind of difficult since I had my tears blocking my vision. I ran for what felt like hours but was only about 5 minutes. It was then that I dropped to my knees crying because I had lost all hope that  would ever be good enough for Ten. The one man that I love with all my heart. I was just sobbing I didn’t care about all the people looking at me or people making fun of me because I needed to let this out. I couldn’t hold it in anymore.

“(Y/N) WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!?!?!?!” I heard my name being called and I knew this is when I had to do it i had to tell him. Even if it ruins everything and Wendy makes my life living hell I can deal with that, it’s this right here that I cannot deal with.

“Ten I need to tell you something right now. This will change everything. I know it will. But I need to do this. Right now. So here it goes. I love you. Ten I am madly in love with you and I know that this will change our relationship and even though you already have a girlfriend I just-” I was cut off by Ten pulling me close and kissing me. In my head I knew this was wrong but I couldn’t help it I was finally being kissed by someone  I was in love with.

“(Y/N) I love you.”

AN: This ending sucked, I am so sorry