#baby's first experience being twitter vagued

[local-magpie]

im not gonna lie being called a softboy because i told someone not to make a prison rape joke is both objectively hilarious and feels like i lowkey got called a slur

[arsonkoobi]

taekooker to jikooker: my personal experience.

this is merely how i felt and all the things i saw while being a hardcore taekooker for almost a year and a half. if you get offended, im sorry but the unfollow and block button is right there, i dont mind. i love taekook themselves, but i can no longer look at them in the way i used to. now they genuinely look like best friends to me. people change, and their perceptions and views on different aspects of life change. thats what happened to me.

I first joined this fandom 5 years ago in mid january 2018 through my friends. taehyung was my first ever bias, so most of the bts related yt recs i had were mostly of taehyung and ot7, and occasional ship videos among which taekook was the most prominent. me being a curious lil unsuspecting lamb, clicked on one, it also helped that my friends were taekookers as well so i dived pretty deep into the rabbit hole of taekook. im gonna be writing my thoughts and experiences on shipping taekook at different times of the year. i dont remember every single detail clearly (like this was 5 years ago) so forgive me if i sound vague at times plus this will only be a summary. without further ado, lets start, shall we?

february-march, 2018

by this time, i already watched quite a few taekook analysis videos, i also came across a few tkk_lives' videos(i think i came across her vids like much later but i just included it here) as well as other deluded channels. i fell even deeper into the rabbit hole. i thought taekook were the epitome of boyfriends silly in love, i felt like they had the best chemistry and that they were the ones whose ship actually made sense. i feel so embarrassed to admit this but one of my rather major reasons for shipping them was how good they looked tgthr🤦‍♀️(im a changed person now i promise). now i realise many tkk analysis channels tend to heavily edit things to make it look like theres something going on, overanalysing things to no end, it made me see them as if they were closer than they actually are, and as if theyre hiding something, but it was really just heavy and clever editing that forces your mind to get convinced. it was quite literally manipulative. plus back then, i was rather immature and hadnt even been in a rltnshp yet, so i blindly believed whatever they said. i believed every narrative and every theory they put out even if i knew lots of them didnt even make sense. they constantly also put out the jealous jungkook/taehyung whenever the other breathes next to another member..as i now realise, thats one of the biggest toxic traits a person can have. they were always pushing tkk as a toxic relationship without even knowing it(or just ignoring it). i also do not like jikook analysis vids where they are portrayed as the same territorial mfs who cant stand the other interacting with anyone else but himself. bc thats literally pushing their relationship as a toxic one and making them look toxic, and i would rather not do that.

march/april-september, 2018

i only watched taekook vids and funny bts moments for a long while as a baby army. i didnt watch official content very much, i ddint even know how to watch official content..i didnt know bangtantv existed yet💀 this tkk analysis watching continued for around 4 or so months after i became an army before i took an unintentional break from them(analysis vids) and i went on twitter. twitter, was so much worse(as i now realise). i didnt have an account at that time and learnt to browse on twt without one(it doesnt really let you do that anymore). at first, i found nothing weird or unusual and i enjoyed lurking on twitter, but slowly i started to see the ugly side of the community. i found multiple accounts directly or indirectly hating on jimin. i was weirded out. very weirded out. i was quite conflicted but..i only thought of it as jimin haters who were coincidentally tkkrs, maybe i refused to see tkk shippers in a bad light? probably, unfortunately i cant remember much and as i said, i was immature.

october-december, 2018

i stumbled across gcf in tokyo somewhere in october, i think it was in a fanwar on twitter and a jkkr said "at least we have this" or sumn along that line and put a link to gcft . idek how i didnt see it earlier. immediately after watching it, i felt..weird, conflicted, insecure. insecure about my ship. it seemed so romantic to me even then. but ofc i didnt let myself give up immediately, and i searched interviews + info about it, i found tkkrs saying vminkook were supposed to go tgthr and jikook only went bc they had a few days off and tae didnt. that gave me a lil bit of security and i held onto that thread of security and refused to believe or even hear out the actual fact(which i will come to later). as you can see, i was a stubborn mf. inside i knew that even if tae not having time off was the "only" reason behind jikook's japan trip, it was still unusual and suspicious to go on a trip with only your "bro" when said "bro" has told you and the world multiple times that they wanna go on a trip alone with you, when the hotel room you're staying at with your "bro" has a see-through glass wall for the bathroom and when you make a whole love confession in the guise of a travel log for your "bro" while your boyfie is waiting for you at home.

in conclusion, i was very insecure.

did i give up? no, not yet. we're getting there.

so as a masochist and out of curiosity caused by insecurity, i searched up jikook videos on yt, thinking "there's no way they could ever have more chemistry than taekook 🙄" - when i tell you i was wrong as fuck, i mean it. i was HUMBLED. the chemistry and tension between jungkook and jimin was undeniable. i felt uncomfortable watching some certain moments, felt things that i didnt feel while shipping taekook, saw things i didnt see in taekook.

i was confused plus the sinking feeling you get when you've been too loud about what you think and your opinions but then it turns out you were a stupid ass bitch.

there was a plethora of jikook vids, and i think my first jikook video was from Made in Busan, ig it was the "serendipity" analysis? back then it made lots of sense to me, but now it looks slightly overanalyzed (i still believe "serendipity" is very much connected to jikook tho). i slowly got more introduced to jikook in general. this mainly occured in like the first week of october and december as i had my boards in november.

december/january-february, 2019

so its been more or less of a year since ive become a tkkr, gcft is still in the back of my head screaming at me. and then jikook drop another bomb. that is, 2018 MMA.

this..was just, just..i cant explain it in words. jungkook had every bit of his attention directed towards jimin, they were giving each other loving glances, jimin giving jungkook a flying kiss, jungkook giving jimin a finger heart, jungkook subconsciously massaging jimins nape..it was just so domestic and coupley. i've never third wheeled so bad in my life. i felt like i was interrupting something by watching them. imagine how hyunjae next to them felt😔✊not to mention how it very much looked like jungkook was saying "남편"[ nampyeon] meaning "husband" and "형의 남친"[ hyung-ui namchin ] meaning " hyung's boyfriend" in their conversation after jimin pointed to himself and jungkook (forgive me if the spellings/romanizations are not accurate enough, im not fully fluent in korean). plus, after jungkook said it, jimin smiles and shyly looks down..LIKE??

watch from 31:00 to see for yourself. im not kidding.(p.s i love this video so much)

i was bamboozled. i was shocked. i was frustrated. i was feeling stupid. i was begging for taekook to drop something mindblowing or sumn that would regain my secuity in the ship and i found some moments during other award shows but, it didnt feel the same. to me it was really looking like taekook had boundaries and limits between each other, the limits that apply when you're good friends. but with jikook, i couldnt see how their gazes towards each other could be passed off as anything platonic, how their actions+body language could ever be seen as platonic.

so what did i do? did i give up? oh hell no im stubborn as fuck. but we're getting there.

i ignored every jikook moment and brought my focus back on taekook, i started watching analysis and moments again. in a span of a few weeks, the security around my ship had improved after pretending that i didnt feel like a stupid mf after MMA 2018. haha. it sorta worked lol. sorta.

march-may, 2019

these were my last months as a taekooker.

after all that shit, all i wanted was more taekook moments to make me feel better about myself. and i did get quite a few. however, as i said before, they looked like they had boundaries. i couldnt look at them exactly the same.

i was busy in april with my class tests, i doubt i had much time to catch up with the boys. so when the tests ended, it was most likely in the last week of april or the first few days of may.

we all know what happened in the first few days of may, don't we? in case you don't, this is what happened.

surprisingly, i clearly remember the first time i got to know about it.

it was in class, i just arrived and then one of my friends and i start talking and she goes [this convo is all translated from bengali]

"hey did you see what jungkook did at the latest concert?"

"no, i didn’t, what did he do?"

"he went and literally sucked on jimins ear!"

i was shocked once again, my eyes went wide, my heart did a backflip..all that shit. i didnt believe it at first.

"don't joke around like that, you're being absurd" i said.

"im not kidding bro, he sucked jimins ear in the rosebowl concert last week, ill send you a link too"

when i got back home, sure enough, the link was there and i saw jungkooks ear nibbling in all its glory, albeit a bit low quality. but no doubt he took that ear into his mouth and i knew it.

surely i must've given up now? no, but im this🤏 close we're almost there i promise

i went online and found lots of tkkrs denying that jungkook ever took jimin's ear into his mouth and that jimin's ear only got caught on jk's chin. but..if it got caught on jk's chin then that means his chin was behind jimin's ear, and his lips must have been at least kissing jimin's ear, given that we couldnt see them very well. the lip we could see was the upper lip, which again lead me to be believe that jungkook did indeed, suck jimin's ear.

yeah, my faith in tkk was crumbling into millions of pieces. because i couldnt see how jungkook, being in a supposed relationship with taehyung, could do that with tae's best friend. i sure as hell wouldnt let my partner get away with that, nor would i ever do that myself with someone else other than my partner. even if its to comfort them. it just goes way over platonic boundaries.

i was seriously considering shifting over to jikook by now. but before that, i searched lots of shit up abt jikook.

there i saw an interview where jimin talked about the tokyo trip with jungkook. what i believed until now was that vminkook were supposed to go tgthr but jikook were the ones with time off, and tae didnt have time off. jimin said he told taehyung and jungkook that he wants to go on a trip to Japan. he didnt say he wanted to go on a trip WITH taehyung and jungkook. yall, ive told my wishes to go to japan and turkey multiple times to my friends, does that mean im taking their asses with me? no. mind you, jimin has said he wanted to go on a trip alone with jungkook multiple times in their rookie era. on jimin's bday of 2017, jungkook tweeted a pic of him(jimin) with the caption "Its not over yet.." and shortly after, we find out jikook went on a tokyo trip by THEMSELVES with no staff, no managers and no other members. dropped off at the airport by jungkook's dad and brother and jimin's dad. jungkook paid for everything and put a hell lot of time into making the masterpiece that is gcf in tokyo WITH a bgm of a gay fucking song by a queer fucking artist and showed the fucking rainbow colored ferris wheel at the line "love is a road that goes both ways".

also

its clear who the main model of gcf is.

you can deny the trip being only for jikook, but you can not deny the symbolism and significance shown in gcf in tokyo. saying "jungkook didnt understand the song, hes not fluent in english" - is so small minded and belittling.

saying he didnt show jimin on the parts "boy, im holding onto something, wont let go of you for nothing, im running, running just to keep my hands on you" on purpose is not only straight up denial but also understimating jungkook's intelligence and artistic capabilities, saying that jungkook isnt smart enough to get the meaning behind these words. and just because hes korean. thats fucking racist if you ask me.

then i discovered the iconic osaka vlives, i was convinced. it was my last straw along with rosebowl.

alas, after around a week of denial, i gave up and became a jikooker in mid may of 2019. ive never looked back. over the years they've only given us more and more evidence and i doubt my beliefs will ever change soon.

i hope this was kinda fun to read, i had been planning to do this for a long time. im glad i finally got to say my thoughts out here. thank you for taking the time to read this<3

[heaventree13]

How Jikook Found Me

Hi anyone who happens upon this!

**I'm going to preface this with the information that I don't know how to link stuff, embed etc, so hopefully my attempts to do so will work!!**

I've been thinking of doing a "how I discovered jikook" post forever, because I love coming across other's similar stories, and was inspired this morning by @jiminieloved post below:

We discovered jikook at pretty much exactly the same time, if in slightly different ways.

I first joined instagram around October 2019, after only being on facebook prior to that (I had started a twitter account at some point, but had never used it), and somehow the algorithm decided I would be interested in Larry Stylinson. I don't know why. I knew who One Direction were, but didn't really listen to them. I didn't know what a "ship" was, except for "Bennifer" and "Brangelina", and that's not even really the same thing, is it? Anyhoo- it turned out I was a bit of a Larry. They were adorable and what I saw was compelling at the time.

Then, of course, the algorithm started throwing in some other ships for my consideration, and along came the vmin ship videos.

I had no idea who they were at first. I had heard of BTS, vaguely recalled seeing them on some entertainment news program once, but (much to my chagrin, as I could have been listening to them earlier), hadn't paid attention. I'm embarrassed and a little ashamed to say I just remember they all had different coloured hair, were so impossibly pretty, and thought they were likely just a fad.

Don't hate me!! I would fight to the death for all 7 of them now!!!

But I digress! So, I thought vmin were so sweet. Nothing necessarily romantic there to my eyes, but I had an open mind about it, and I had never seen that kind of affection between males. I ate it up. I'm a 50 year old female (46 at the time), and from Canada, and this was so outside my personal experience. I adopted them into my heart. I watched everything I could find on instagram.

And then some stray jikook content started sliding in.

And I got worried. What about my vmin babies? Was my mischievous little V ( I didn't know him as Tae Tae yet) going to get his heart hurt? Of course, I was seeing stuff that had already happened years before in most cases, but all very new and "real time" to my heart, that was slowly turning a vivid purple without my knowledge 💜. But what I was seeing in jikook was quickly becoming undeniable in my eyes.

And I was blown away. My heart remembered what it was like to believe the stories I read and watched in romantic books and movies when I was young. I had decided that was all just the stuff of fiction, and that maybe I was a fool to have believed in it. But no- these two young Korean men were putting Mr. Darcy and Miss Elizabeth to shame! In real life!! I had to slide over to YouTube. I had to start searching stuff like "the way Jungkook looks at Jimin":

And I was able to reconcile vmin and jikook for what I believe it is- no animosity, no competition (at least romantically) because it's two different kinds of love, both just as real. Not that I don't see moments in the content where I think our Tae Tae felt left out, but our babies (all seven of them) had all lived together and done everything together for so long, I think their relationships are not like anything most of us will ever experience or be able to fit into any tidy relationship categories. They are so much more than that.

Somewhere in my searches I found this excellent 3-part commentary by @mimiandkookie4607 :

And this then this favourite by @themooniswaitingforus (who also makes some really beautiful song edits ,btw) :

Then I started wanting to watch original content, so I joined WeVerse and VLive. And then of course, as will happen, I fell in love with all 7 of our amazing, hard working, passionate, talented, brave, fun, impressive young men. I will love and support them until they are old men (or at least much older, as I won't be around as long as I fervently hope they will).

There is more, of course. So much more, but I've run out of steam for today! I do want to say that I joined tumblr because of jikook, as well. I first discovered @dalloga through the Korean Perspective video (they haven't been active for a little bit, but it's worth it to go read their blog, for those who haven't), and then @stormblessed95, and went further down the proverbial rabbit hole from there.

Thank you for reading. Stay positive. Be kind. Seek out happy!

[buds-and-baubles]

(the authority 1999-2002 issue #3)

after enduring comic after comic where apollo's superpowers were downplayed so he could be rescued by midnighter and seeing a twitter post by either an actual dc writer or someone random on twitter say apollo was never and will never be as strong as superman, i was motivated to do this post. plus, his wiki is surprisingly.. sparse.

down below after i explain apollo's power level classification, i have all his powers, abilities and weaknesses listed. some are on his wiki which is at the bottom of this post and are mostly the same words, others are things he should have but aren't or are vaguely mentioned but never put down.

some expansion was given to certain existing things that i felt were incomplete, but you'll be able to see that if you compare his wiki. let's get into it, shall we?

(the authority 1999-2002 issue #2)

in this comic panel this line is said by jenny sparks, spirit of the 20th century, and down below in his unique physiology classifies apollo as a 'majestic-class' superhuman. this is named after mister majestic, wildstorm's aka earth-50's superman. based on evidence, this is the same level as alpha level that is used in dc, which is the classification used for both superman and wonder woman.

this in entirety means that apollo is either the same as or stronger than mister majestic and superman respectively.

powers and abilities;

powers:

- unique physiology: apollo and midnighter similarly possess unique physiology as a result of being bioengineered/built as superhuman by henry bendix. these post-human 'prometheans' have three running rumors on their creation; they were young adult former u.s soldiers who were conscripted, they were kidnapped children, or they were modified test-tube babies of cloned human dna from petri-dishes grown to adulthood. regardless of creation, they were experimented on where they underwent time on medical tables and or in cloning stasis/stasis tanks, as well as intense combat training to make them who they are. however, they maintain retrograde amnesia regarding their life before their first mission and all records were destroyed so there is no way to confirm their origins. due to apollo's unique genetic makeup and abilities, he is classified as a majestic-class (or alpha in dc) level superhuman.

- solar absorption: like superman, apollo's powers are dependent on the sun, needing only exposure or access to activate. unlike superman however, apollo's body behaves more like a solar panel than a battery, as his powers are far more directly dependent on direct sunlight and a few hours worth of solar reserves; whereas superman's abilities are somewhat more 'internal', but still acts as a solar battery. these reserves contain stored and converted solar energy from solar radiation exposure. when using huge amounts of power and or having no access to solar energy, he will become drained and need to find a way to recharge.

- flight: apollo can fly at great speeds. he has been shown to easily cross the entire globe in less than 30 seconds.

- self-sustenance: apollo does not require food, drink, or sleep (nor need to use the bathroom) indefinitely as his body is entirely sustained by his solar energy. he can also survive in anaerobic environments indefinitely (he flies in space by the simple method of not breathing).

- invulnerability: due to apollo's unique physiology, his body is nigh-invulnerable to all forms of damage including protection against toxins and all known diseases on earth. he has walked and survived on the sun without any sign of discomfort and has been able to easily enter a lava flow to deactivate a volcano.

- longevity: apollo as well as midnighter can live longer than regular humans (possibly indefinitely), remaining at his prime as long as he is under the exposure of the sun. living with their daughter jenny quantum also helps solidify his longevity due to her abilities.

- accelerated healing: though commonly invulnerable to mostly all attacks, apollo can be injured by the depletion of his solar energy reserves. while he is still durable, he is susceptible to physical damage. when presented with solar energy, his wounds heal within a matter of minutes if not seconds normally.

- superhuman senses: all of apollo's senses are enhanced to superhuman levels, allowing him to percieve the world in far greater detail than the average human.

- superhuman vision: apollo posesses a superior sensory arrangement of visual capabilities. at low charge, his superhuman vision shuts off.

- heat vision: his eyes are constructed to channel solar energy into laser like blasts, made of concentrated sunlight. the limit of his "laser vision" has not been discovered but it is so powerful that he has scorched the entire surface of the moon without any effort.

- telescopic vision: when fighting with ray palmer, he stated he could see a single grain of sand in the desert from orbit.

- thermal vision: when searching for paul revere and the sons of liberty, apollo stated he was able to track heat traces.

- superhuman hearing: apollo is able to tune into exactly where he wants to hear, whether it be from the earth's mantle, the carrier, or outer space. when his solar energy is drained, his superhuman hearing turns off back to basic human capabilities.

- superhuman smell: apollo's sense of smell is so strong that he can classify jenny sparks' cigarette brand from an entirely different part of the carrier, which is described as "50 miles long, 35 miles high, and 2 miles wide".

- superhuman taste: like superman, apollo possesses a superior sense of taste.

- superhuman speed: at full solar charge, apollo is capable of moving, reacting, running, and flying at superhuman speeds. while not as fast as a speedster on foot, his flying speed could be equated to superman, being able to fly laps around the earth with relative ease. in conjunction with his energy projection and superhuman strength, his speed is great enough to shred through ship fleets with ease, and his impacting into the ground is able to generate substantial shockwaves.

- superhuman stamina: apollo is able to maintain continous physical actions as long as he has enough solar energy in his reserves. he can also fly through earth's orbit without any protective equipment.

- superhuman strength: apollo possesses near limitless strength at full charge, though the exact limits of apollo's strength is unknown. apollo's known feats of strength include lifting skyscraper sized statues, crumbled buildings, and falling ships.

- superhuman reflexes: although apollo relies primarily on his other powers, his reaction speed is beyond faster than the finest human athlete.

- superhuman agility: apollo's agility, balance, and bodily coordination are enhanced to superhuman levels. this allows him to easily make sharp turns and maneuver while flying and moving at superhuman speed.

- energy projection: apollo can also release solar energy from other parts of his body like his hands or omnidirectionally from his entire body in the form of powerful energy explosions. the full potential of his energy projection is unknown but it is so sheerly forceful and hot that it is able to melt nearly anything with ease including bullets, shrapnel, ship fleets, and living beings down to ashes.

- kirlian aura: apollo has a kirlian aura in the form a halo around his head, it being a visual phenomenon of ionized electrical coronal discharges, with his solar radiation absorption in his body acting as a conductor carrying high voltage through the electromagnetic spectrum. it is a passive ever-present ability. when drained of solar energy, it becomes dim or disappears completely.

abilities:

- expert combatant: due to being subject to a u.s./u.n black ops soldier's full combat training and consistently engaging in battle using his superpowers against various foes, apollo is an excellent fighter. he has over time become advanced in hand-to-hand and armed combat. apollo's combat versatility allows him to adapt to nearly every foe, capable of defeating almost every adversary. he also has a basic understanding of first aid and stealth, although he is no longer as effective at the latter due to his halo and other abilities making it difficult to go unseen.

- indominitable will: apollo has shown to have a powerful spirit resistant to corruption and temptation. his ability to survive his experimentation and training carried out by henry bendix in stormwatch, numerous near world ending missions/events, multiple times tortured in captivity, and several attempts at mind control are all examples of his indomitable will. despite what apollo has gone through, he is for the most part optimistic and rarely ever gives up.

- meditation: starting from when he and midnighter were on the run and hiding, apollo learned and engaged in various hobbies to calm himself including domestic activities, the arts, and zen and yoga techniques as forms of meditation to reclaim himself in order to feel more than simply a killing machine designed by bendix.

- weaponry: despite apollo's great power and fighting skills, he did learn how to use firearms, knives, and swords during his combat training.

- tactical analysis: apollo is able to comprehend and suggest strategies during a fight due to his time with stormwatch zero.

- leadership: apollo was the leader of a black ops stormwatch team named stormwatch zero. however, the deaths of most of his team while under his command turned him off from leadership roles permenantly.

- intimidation: apollo has refined his intimidation tactics from his training to work in conjunction with his powers, making him a frightening presence. this has been displayed when he has interrogated people for information, flying them high up in the sky, and dropping them after he gets what he needs.

weakness:

- vulnerability to ionized atmosphere discharge: the ionized coronal discharge electrostatic blast of krigstein's super soldier storm god during their fight overloaded the high voltage carried in apollo's body like a conductor through his solar radiation absorption. this caused an electrical surge which disrupted the energy matrix delegating his solar energy reserves, weakening him to make him vulnerable enough to enhanced human retaliatory strikes.

- solar depletion: apollo can drain himself through overuse of his powers as well as the fact that when he is living on the carrier, it does not provide him with a constant exposure to solar energy. however, even when drained he will be able to fly (barely) after 20 seconds in direct sunlight, though it would take him 2 hours to be at full charge. this can be somewhat circumvented by transporting (using the carrier's 'door' system) into close proximity to the sun. this is in contrast to superman, who can never "run out" of power. he may weaken, but it's in the same vein as an athlete who has exhausted himself, rather than a car that has no fuel left to function. apollo's abilities are entirely dependent on the amount used in his reserves of stored and converted solar energy from solar absorption, but by no means is he entirely helpless during the times when he is running low on rays. apollo will die if he completely depletes his solar stores, and his superhuman talents will drop accordingly when weakened to the point where he's essentially human. it has been seen that his power can be easily depleted when he is blocked off from solar energy when it has no way at all to reach him and he expends energy. the signs of this are he becomes increasingly withered and aged.

- sensory overload: apollo's superhumanly senses can be overwhelmed and disorientated to the point of pain when encountering extreme external stimuli such as hypersonics and flashbangs.

- vulnerability to extreme temperature changes: if shot, hit, or falling for a trap consisting of extremely cold temperatures, apollo's powers can be heavily affected. such is also applied to him during winter due to a combination of frigid weather and limited access to sunlight. this weakness was demonstrated by the midnighter in the authority: revolution, when apollo was hit with a blast of enhanced liquid nitrogen which quick cooled him, robbing him of much of his solar power as all the heat in his body had been rapidly evaporated into sweat.

- vulnerability to cold

i tried to expand upon canon while sticking to it, the only vaguely headcanon bits being jenny q's impact on longevity and the bit about winter in weakness to extreme temperature changes.

[clawsextended]

daphne kluger is the result of selina's first and most significant long-con. none of the following exists in any capacity besides within selina's impeccable ability to adhere to a lie and alana stark's impeccable ability to help her perpetuate them.

daphne was born in belleville, kansas, daughter of john and maria kluger, a bouncing baby girl with a pair of gorgeous doe eyes and a 'headstrong' disposition. little is known about daphne's early life, save for the fact that she was orphaned as a teenager due to an incident that left her with an innumerable menagerie of scars and burns. daphne was discovered not long after, wormed her way into the hearts and onto the television sets of adoring citizens the world over. she quickly earned the title america's sweetheart.

(this is, of course, the result of an extremely well-fabricated series of falsified photos, a half-finished memoir ghost-written by alana stark, innumerable 'home movies', a lifetime of deep fakes to build a person that selina embodies on a very public scale.)

daphne is known as the media darling anyone would clamor to represent or interview. while she is extraordinarily private for a star of her caliber, daph never shies away from make a wish appearances (those in particular), has been openly outspoken about her disappointment in the industry, written several op-ed pieces about her own experiences, and will regularly get into a twitter fight about anything. she refuses to accept a blue checkmark and would rather die. she changes her name constantly for this reason. working with daphne is an almost definite award nomination of whatever sort you're looking for -- she brings out the best in those opposite her, but not without working you to the bone and forcing you to reevaluate everything about yourself and the world around you.

her current residence is the plaza hotel, penthouse suite, new york, ny.

(holly had been madly in love with eloise at the plaza, and with new york barely more than an hour from gotham, selina had been both keen and ecstatic to give holly the experience. it's a little girl's dream and nothing would stop the cat from making that come true.)

daphne kluger is notoriously single and known for being extremely reluctant to allow anyone into her personal life. public knowledge about her is scarce, but it comes down to only a few facts: she can't have her own kids, she was in a vague accident that caused her grievous bodily harm and orphaned her in her teenage years, her father was abusive, she has never dated anyone for any significant span of time nor shown any interest in the subject, she is a natural blonde.

the infamous heist of the toussaint cartier necklace and all the crown jewels occurred from around daphne's gorgeous neck -- the heist that was calculated by selina long, long before the met gala was ever in sight. the arrival of deborah ocean and her team forced daphne to join them in order for the job to go smoothly. debbie is unaware that daphne is selina kyle, and knows nothing of the catwoman outside of the extremely rare times they've been in proximity to one another in around the same building.

daphne is an invaluable part of debbie's team, though she went into retirement after the toussaint's heist and has not been seen since.

film.

rachel getting married (academy award)

get smart

rio

rio 2

brokeback mountain

alice through the looking glass

valentine's day

serenity

the intern

love & other drugs

les misérables (academy award)

the devil wears prada

the witches

eloise at the plaza

barbie

the princess diaries

the princess diaries 2: royal engagement

eileen

stage.

twelfth night

carnival!

television.

saturday night live!

the simpsons

rupaul's drag race

elmo's christmas countdown

[heartbrake-hotel]

Ugh. You won't believe this. I'm sorry to bug you, but I just needed to vent.

I saw some idiot on twitter saying that when E met Priscilla he had an eleven year old girl living with him in Germany. They mentioned Scotty Moore said that in his book so I looked it up. What he said was at the time E met Cilla, he had an "even younger German girl" (his words) living in the house with his father and grandmother. Except...well, I can't find any proof of this; there’s no evidence nor mention of this girl (or how old she was) anywhere else in the book nor in any other books written about him. No proof he had anyone else like that living with him in Germany.

So I don’t think that claim is true. Where do people come up with this stuff anyway? How do you not get into an argument with these idiots? Because it's super annoying.

ugh, believe it or not, baby, im not surprised at all. but you could never bug me !!! 💖 sorry it took me so long to answer this, but rest assured i haven't calmed down about this any since you first sent it 😅

a couple notes‐ honestly, i'm inclined to believe scotty. NOT TWITTER to clarify lol.. eleven seems young for him even if you are looking to view e through the most unflattering light possible 😬 but it seems likely to me that he had another teenage girl maybe not uh. officially on the lease or anything but staying over most nights ! more than ONE even sounds plausible.. we all know that someone didn't like his bed cold.!

people who claim to hate elvis sure spend an awful lot of time reviling him on the internet, especially by regurgitating half-remembered anecdotal evidence without citing their sources. 🙄 on the other hand, it's also easy to fall into the trap of too-faithful elvis historian; by that i mean that the fact that so much of his life is documented sometimes makes us complacent in our belief that if it can't be verified by multiple primary sources that it must not have happened. but we can't always say, and getting too involved as if the historical accuracy of one particular proposed event is the end-all be-all of elvis fandom can get exhausting.!

i wouldn't be surprised to find out either way, that this was or wasn't true. but you're free to make up your own mind, and if it distresses you, then fwiw i think you Totally have a leg to stand on affirming it never happened, like you said !! ultimately, it doesn't have much bearing on right now- if you like elvis, this vague and nebulous criticism probably isn't the thing that'll make you stop liking elvis, and if you hate elvis, you're probably determined to keep doing that regardless.

regarding the twitdiots- while looking into this claim i found a lady on there who legitimately believed that agent elvis tells the true story of how e was experimented on and mind controlled into drug abuse by the government.. like she said That with her whooole chest. so i don't put much stock in public opinion over there 😂😂💀

i want to fight those people extremely often (they're not just on twitter, either- it seems to have died down a little praise GOD but especially in early days after the movie there was a wave of ppl on here who would put their elvis hate in the main tags. WHICH DROVE ME BATTY), but i come from the "don't feed the trolls" era of fandom. as much as id like to rip 'em a new one when they rehash the same two issues over and over and OVER again ad nauseum, i content myself with the fact that they're living a pathetic existence in which they actively choose to fill their life with something they dislike for... no discernable reason.?

no one who spends their time bringing up a dead celebrity at all opportunities just to bash them is actually open to a discussion. and i do think there is a discussion to be had- his life was certainly very troubled, and i think there are a lot of nuanced issues that benefit from being spoken about openly !!!

but i like to debate bc i like to WIN- so jackasses tend to be a waste of my time 😘

[aquarii-writes]

Dsmp Headcanons

So ngl I've been really into the dream smp recently and I've been doing a bit of art for it so why not give my headcanons? Also all of these are for the characters not the content creators

Notes: the song referenced in Karl's headcanons is seasonal feathers music box version. This is all I have for now. I���ve lurked around the fandom since about early February and beware this is fucking long

WARNINGS: In some of these I do mention dead parents(various), death in general and as an entity(Philza), alcoholism(Schlatt), and traumatic experiences. None are in detail but just beware. Oh and a slight suicide warning for Dream

DREAM

Dream got his mask from his father and Drista got hers from their mother

His mask is specifically a gift from his mother after his father died

Dreams mask is infused with dreamons. His parents made a deal with a few dreamons and the dreamons now live in the masks

He will never say what his eye color is because he doesnt care, but if you can catch him without the mask you'll see his eyes are an amber color

He watched his mother commit when he was about 12~ and when Drista was 6. At the time he didnt want to understand why

WILBUR SOOT(plus Ghostbur)

Wilbur's mother is a fox hybrid(cause ya know I live by the saying that canon is my sandbox and a fuckin fridge doesnt make sense)(Momza anyone?)

His beanie is from his mother along with his love of singing

He has records of his parents singing

He has wings it's just that he never learned to fly

Ghostbur can see various other ghosts he just doesnt realize that no one else can see them

Ghostbur has selective amnesia. He genuinely cant remember parts of his life but some moments are too vivid to forget

FOOLISH GAMERS

He can partially shapeshift to make himself bigger or smaller(23 fuckin feet tall without changing height)

His son, Foolish jr, is biologically his and Jr is a demigod

Jr is too small to see the world yet so Foolish keeps him in an enderchest

Foolish is fully a god

He really likes turtles no damn reason

Aside from keeping his son in a chest, Foolish is a relatively good dad

He's a very good builder and rarely takes time to sleep when hes working on a commission for someone

He is most certainly strong enough to break the egg though he doesnt want to get involved for his sons sake

SAPNAP

He is a hybrid blaze born

BBH found Sap in the middle of the Nether playing with a few baby piglins

He met Quacky before Karl but Karl is the reason the three got together

TECHNOBLADE

Dispite how loud the voices can be sometimes l they can be rather peaceful. They really only get violent during fights

(Based off my techno design) the skull techno uses as a mask is a hoglin skull

Personally I dont think Philza adopted Techno as a son but Techno kinda became friends with Philza when he was just a kid

Techno was a very small child: especially in comparison to the village he came from in the Nether

Piglin hybrid piglin hybrid

Does not know who his parents are all he knows is that his glasses are from his mother

He has a baby sister(the two are half siblings; they have the same dad)

He literally doesnt need the glasses he just keeps them for the aesthetic and because its the only thing he has from his mom

He has a soft spot for Michael and Michelle since all three of them are forms of piglins

FUNDY

He has very vague memories of his mother

Looks stupidly similar to is grandmother; momza

He has a picture of Philza and Momza on their wedding day

One day when he was just a kid,like 14ish, he found an old sword that used to be Philzas and just never told Phil that he took it

KARL JACOBS

He's time traveled less after getting engaged to Quackity and Sapnap

Most of the books he writes never see the light of day again

Some of his books were actually found by one of Ranboo's descendants(not Ranbob)

One of his more scary experiences is when he accidentally met Dream when he was little. Momma Dream almost killed Karl

He's slightly immune to the effects of dreamon possession

He once found an old music box within the inbetween and he hasnt found a name for the song on the music box

PHILZA

He's known as the Angel of Death, or Deaths Angel for a reason(go look at @resonating-kitty s headcanon post about this. Ngl I love it and think it needs more attention)

After the 'death' of Momza, Philza swore to never love till he met Death once more

He remembers a time where hybrids used to be a lot more common: humans will fuck anything remotely humanoid

He doesnt remember if he has parents. By the time Wilbur was old enough to ask about them Philza made up the story that his parents went on to greet death when Wilbur was a baby

He's the reason for Momza's 'death'

SCHLATT

I really like the idea of Schlatt being Tubbo's dad even though it probably wont be canon

When Schlatt was little he watched his father but heads with other ram/sheep hybrids(he found it very funny)

He has a horrid tendency to headbutt people he has strong emotions towards

How hard he headbutts you really depends on what emotions he feels in that moment. The more loving/kind the emotion is the softer he'll be

When in a good mood Schlatt would let Quackity touch his horns

Glatt is a dick head and he knows this. He plays it up to piss people off even more

He comes from a rather large community of ram/sheep hybrids though his family in particular was a little violent

Schlatts first name is Jamison

He has a small ram plush from when he was little: his mother gave it to him before she died

His mother was an alcoholic before him though she was a very sad drunk

THE ERET

Herobrine is their cousin

He is very willing to do next to anything to succeed at something

He doesnt remember his family name

As a kid Eret's mother used to tell them stories of kings and queens. She told them that they could be a ruler one day if they worked hard enough

Their mums name was Elenora

GEORGENOTFOUND

(Based off of @/sctbrr on Twitter. I adore the au they made off this) George is a reincarnation of DreamXD's past lover.

Heterochromia heterochromia

His eyes are brown(left) and blue(right)

His clout glasses allow him to see color

RANBOO

Because he can’t remember his other half he doesn’t know what all he can/can’t do

Though one thing he’s noticed is that he can see much better in the dark than actual people; doesn’t know if he’s half enderman or his other half

As a kid he would pretend to be a dragon with someone. He has a feeling that the person was his father

He has two crowns. One from Techno and one from his mother; it’s one of the few things he genuinely remembers from when he was little

He sees a lot of Tubbo in Michael

Speaking of Michael, the lil one is only about three

TUBBO

He doesn’t know who his parents are and really only saw Philza as a father figure

He’s a ram hybrid like Schlatt

For the longest time he thought bees could understand him

[crossdressingdeath]

Jc stans are so fucking funny, they make these headcanons, which ain’t wrong cuz it's fandom, but the problem is they try to shove it down everyone's throat then when the rest say ‘actually I dont like this headcanon and I prefer canon readings’ they get so fucking angry?? 1/3

theyre so dramatic too, I dont know if you saw the recent tweet battle but a jc stan got angry for a really mild tweet that wasnt even directed at them, put screenshots of the og tweet on their account and their @ and basically kinned jc so hard their braincells exploded, and when people told them to not obsess so much over a fictional character they used the trauma point to say it really hurt them when jc is hurt because comfort character and shit. 2/3

baby, we all got trauma, doesnt mean we're going to make everyone's fandom experience a literal hell where theyre afraid of having a different opinion just cuz you kin a villain but dont like him being one. Be a proud Villain Kin™, dont act like the perpetual victim when you called out someone first and made threats of ‘not holding your tongue’ when you didnt do that from the beginning. 3/3 

I’m going to say this just once: if you are so attached to a fictional character that you can’t bear anyone saying anything negative about them ever and feel the need to attack actual real life people over anything you disagree with it is time to take a step back from fandom. That isn’t healthy. And the reverse also applies; if you’re incapable of seeing anyone say anything positive about a character without making a fuss (here meaning “actively freaking out or going after the people making the posts directly”, not just being a little annoyed or Sick Of Their Shit) that is also unhealthy. People are entitled to their own interpretation of a text/character! Sometimes their interpretation is wrong, but they’re still entitled to it! This is why I blocked the JC tag and use my own tag for him; it’s easy to find if you want to talk shit about him, and it’s easy to block if you don’t. Some people don’t seem to realize that you can filter out tags so that you can avoid content you don’t want to see. That is the purpose of that feature. Random strangers on the internet aren’t obligated to never say a bad word about JC because Twitter user #33306 doesn’t have a healthy relationship with fiction, it’s up to Twitter user #33306 to curate their fandom experience. If you can’t do that... I’m sorry, but fandom is not a good place for you. Either learn how to curate your experience yourself or if you for whatever reason can’t (like maybe the thing you have issues with is so vague that you can’t reasonably expect anyone to tag for it) ask someone you trust to go through anything you want to check out first and tell you if The Thing is in it; it’s not up to people who don’t know you and never will to decide everything based on your specific standards. And yeah, if your favourite character is a villain you have to accept that people are going to see that character as a villain. You can call them misunderstood until you’re blue in the face (and hey, maybe they are, there are some really sympathetic villains out there and even the less-than-sympathetic ones are sometimes judged a bit more harshly than they deserve; take the “JGY is literally always being manipulative and evil even if he gains exactly nothing from it” crowd as an example of that), but if they’re a villain there are going to be a fair few people who judge them as a villain. Sometimes that fits the text, sometimes it doesn’t, but it is going to happen. If you can’t handle it pick a different favourite or curate your experience better.

At the end of the day, what it boils down to is... fandom is supposed to be fun. If seeing someone say something slightly negative about a villain spoils your day and you feel the need to hurt actual people over it, that’s not fun. Take a step back and reconsider your priorities. Liking JC is fine; attacking anyone who doesn’t is not.

[lilydalexf]

Old School X is a project interviewing X-Files fanfic authors who were posting fic during the original run of the show. New interviews are posted every Tuesday.

Interview with Parrotfish

Parrotfish has 20 stories at Gossamer. For many of my interviews I wonder what’s wrong with me for having posted so few fic recs for an author over the years, and Parrotfish is for sure one of them. (What’s wrong with me is what’s wrong with XF fandom - there’s an overwhelming number of amazing fics.) Check out her stories, including gems like Twelfth Voyage and the Caught in the Act series that’s heavy MSR and ends with a long casefile. Big thanks to Parrotfish for doing this interview.

Does it surprise you that people are still interested in reading your X-Files fanfics and others that were posted during the original run of the show (1993-2002)?

It doesn’t surprise me now, but there was a long period when it did. When I started writing fanfic, I thought of it as fleeting and ephemeral, never expecting it to have any lasting power. Mostly I was grateful if we just didn’t get sued for copyright infringement. When it started to become clear that fanfic had permanence, I was gobsmacked. But here we are.

What do you think of when you think about your X-Files fandom experience? What did you take away from it?

For me, it was a very positive experience. I managed to steer clear of most flame wars and unpleasantness (in XF fandom, anyway). And I made friends I’m still in touch with today – that is absolutely the best part.

Social media didn't really exist during the show's original run. How were you most involved with the X-Files online (atxc, message board, email mailing list, etc.)?

ATXC, baby! I know it makes me sound like a dinosaur, but I actually miss usenet.

What did you take away from your experience with X-Files fic or with the fandom in general?

X-Files fic and fandom is where I learned that wanting to tell new stories, or retell existing ones with a new twist, is not a childish impulse, but a really valid, creative endeavor. And also, that smut is good. Well, good smut is good. Bad smut is funny.

What was it that got you hooked on the X-Files as a show?

Compelling characters responding to impossible circumstances, plus a really creative use of genre storytelling to reflect the times.

What got you involved with X-Files fanfic?

I honestly don’t remember how I stumbled across ATXC, but once I did, I think the elapsed time between reading my first fanfic and writing one could be measured in nanoseconds.

What is your relationship like now to X-Files fandom?

Completely nonexistent. Back in the day, I would never have believed you if you’d told me that I would someday be indifferent not just to XF fandom, but to the XF itself. But honestly, I am, other than a vague sense of nostalgia.

Were you involved with any fandoms after the X-Files? If so, what was it like compared to X-Files?

My first fandom predates XF by decades – Star Trek. After XF, I was very involved in just one (Doctor Who), and nominally in a couple more. As crazy and argumentative as XF fandom could be, I felt DW fandom was worse, probably in large part because the internet had exploded, and there were just so many people involved. DW fandom ended up being a much less positive experience than XF fandom. I felt that people had abandoned all pretense of being supportive or kind. When I realized that meanness was starting to suck me in, I walked away.

Who are some of your favorite fictional characters? Why?

This could take all day, so I’ll just randomly pick one: Captain James T. Kirk, because he (and Star Trek) was my first fannish obsession. You never get over your first.

Do you ever still watch The X-Files or think about Mulder and Scully?

Nope. But I suppose I got a liftetime’s worth of M&S in just a few years.

Do you ever still read X-Files fic? Fic in another fandom?

XF, no. Other fandoms, almost never. I dunno – the shine seems to be off that apple.

Do you have any favorite X-Files fanfic stories or authors?

You know, it’s been so long, it’s hard to remember. Of course, Iolokus by MustangSally and RivkaT springs to mind. I’m hesitant to mention various others whom I only remember by their real names (and many of whom published under their real names early on – we never imagined that would become a problem!). But I do want to mention Leyla Harrison, who wrote so feelingly about the Scully cancer arc as she herself battled, and ultimately succumbed to cancer. Later, a character was named for her. She was a friend.

What is your favorite of your own fics, X-Files and/or otherwise?

Sub Rosa, which was an installment in my otherwise forgettable, mostly smutty Caught in the Act series. No idea where the inspiration for that came from. It was written entirely on trains commuting to work.

Do you think you'll ever write another X -Files story? Or dust off and post an oldie that for whatever reason never made it online?

Mmmm….nope.

Do you still write fic now? Or other creative work?

It’s been a while.

What's the story behind your pen name?

I used to scuba dive a lot. I liked parrotfish, and I loved that it was a fish named for a bird.

Do your friends and family know about your fic and, if so, what have been their reactions?

Mostly no, or very little. It’s my own private little world.

Is there a place online (tumblr, twitter, AO3, etc.) where people can find you and/or your stories now?

Nope. It’s all just floating out there in the ether somewhere.

Is there anything else you'd like to share with fans of X-Files fic?

There are no bad story ideas, only badly written stories.

(Posted by Lilydale on March 16, 2021)

[mariaiscrafting]

i saw you talk about “blocking etiquette” in one of your posts and i was wondering if you could briefly explain that? my blog is a baby (i joined in march) so i really don’t know any of the unspoken social rules haha. i feel i should know this before i say anything ever thats dream critical lmao

also saw you have a ton of asks so feel free to answer or not there’s no obligation ! take care of urself it seems like a lot to handle rn

I'd like to preface this by disclaiming that I've been on Tumblr since 2014, so I think I have a good sense of blocking etiquette as it's evolved with Tumblr culture, but I might still be presumptuous/wrong about some things.

Anyways. So, on Tumblr, there's generally always been a "block first, ask questions later" mentality. No matter the fandom, people kinda just unfollow or block people at will because Tumblr's algorithm is so shit at recommending things for people that unfollowing/blocking are really the primary ways to tailor what you don't want to see. So, if you frequent a search term/tag search, like "dream smp," you'd likely block someone who posts things frequently to that tag, but whose content you dislike. Blocking is, obviously, still used as a means to stop interacting with just plain assholes, as it is on every social media site. But more times than not, Tumblr users block blogs for neutral reasons related to how they want to tailor their social media experience, rather than a personal vendetta against someone.

Frankly, from my perspective, this was the main use of block lists back in the day. They weren't so much ways to truly hate on anyone's blog since anyone deemed a true asshole would likely spur a reporting campaign against them, rather than an addition to a blocklist. No, Tumblr blocklists were almost always so people who frequented certain tags simply... didn't have to put up with some people. If there was a wave of problematic shippers inundating a fandom/character tag, of TERFs inundating trans/feminism tags, or something similar, they would likely be put on a blocklist simply because Tumblr users wanted a comprehensive list of people they might come across, but didn't want to have to see posts from. Along a similar vein, a lot of mcytblr blogs advocate simply blocking people who post imagines in the main mcyt/dream smp tags, rather than harrassing each and every one of them into fixing their tag habits. Like, they're just annoying, really, and this social media site is so big that just blocking the ones who frequent the tag is so much easier than anything else.

One notable difference about Tumblr blocking as compared to Twitter blocking is the malintent behind Twitter blocking. Twitter fandom subtwts will advocate for blocking someone particularly if they're being cancelled/a Twitter user simply dislikes them enough. In addition, I've seen more than one Twitter user unironically say that they block people who unfollow them, as if following/unfollowing them were a personal affront, and blocking people were some component of this social game that reeks of cliqueness and high school levels of maturity.

That isn't to say that Tumblr blocking etiquette doesn't have pitfalls, because it has many. The main one I've noticed is that, especially in smaller fandom spaces, someone who's considered problematic might be enmassed blocked by lots of users in that fandom, and effectively be shut out of that fandom. If they're put onto a blocklist, a problematic post is circulated enough, or they're blocked by enough "big blogs" in the fandom, these users can be kept from reblogging, liking, or sending asks to a large part of the fandom they participate in. Vague posting doesn't really get you anywhere on Tumblr because of how insular each blog is, as opposed to Twitter, where screenshotting someone's profile who's blocked you and/or complaining very obviously about someone blocking you without naming them is commonplace and can be easily spread throughout a subtwt. This means Tumblr blogs who were mass blocked end up reaching much less members of their fandom, cannot really stand up for themselves in the face of mass blocking unless they're infamous enough for people to recognize their name, or participate in the discourse that promoted their blocking in the first place. While I haven't really experienced this, all of this is taken from what I've observed mutuals and recognizable blogs going through over the years.

Another note is that this website is kinda fucked, coding-wise. We all know this. This means that there are a million holes in the blocking system that make it even more annoying to navigate when people have blocked you, and that ends up getting more people blocked than maybe should be.

First of all, those imagine blogs aren't just posting in the main tags for shits and giggles, or to be cumbersome and clutter the main tags. They're doing it because Tumblr is dying, and even in a fandom as big as mcytblr, it's almost impossible to boost/promote your original content. The Tumblr algorithm sucks at spreading awareness about popular posts, more and more Twitter refugees means less and less people who fucking reblog > liking posts, and basically the only way posts can blow up anymore is by being found through a tag that is trending or frequently browsed through the "most recent" setting. This includes dream smp and many smp character names, so obviously imagine blogs are going to take advantage of this and maintag. It's the reason mcytblr constantly tags "m*necraft" despite being told off, time and time again, for doing so by mineblr. And it's the reason I've likely been blocked by many people- because I had to make the decision between spreading awareness of a post that took a lot of effort and that I thought was important enough to main tag despite being critical/negative, or keeping mcytblr happy by not cluttering their bias's tag with a crit post. Sure, some of mcytblr likely blocked me because they thought I was annoying/disagree with me, and that's fine. But I'm sure many blocked me for the same reason I block imagine blogs and mineblr blocks dream smp stans- because they wanted to peruse their fave's tags, and they simply blocked a random blog that posted something they didn't like, without really thinking much of it.

Second of all, side blogs kinda fuck up how blocking works. It's annoying as hell to see a post you really like in the main tag/search, only to find that the person blocked you upon trying to reblog. Because of sideblogs, people will oftentimes block a sideblog because it's that user's fandom blog, without blocking their main, so the user is left kinda seeing their stuff time and time again, without being able to interact with it.

Speaking of how fucky the code is because of the blogging system, reblogs make it even worse. Most social media sites simply make it so a blocked user cannot see another user's profile, posts and all. But Tumblr not only allows this, it kinda fucks up the search function by sometimes allowing people you've blocked/who've blocked you to show up in main tag searches, it didn't take into account the fact that you can still see an OP's post when someone else reblogs it, and Tumblr didn't think to just fucking fix all these holes and just wholly omit someone's posts if they've blocked you, or you've blocked them. So, despite blocking people, you can still be logged in and see all their shit, and they can see yours. It's kind of annoying as fuck.

[maxismatchccworld]

Welcome back to our latest - and last! - Deep Dive into the gameplay of The Sims 4 Nifty Knitting Stuff Pack. I’ve really enjoyed sharing the designs and development of this pack with you, and I hope to continue doing these sorts of posts in the future. It’s been a super cool experience, and I hope you’ve enjoyed reading these! In today’s post I’ll talk about the feature that is core to everything in this pack, Knitting! Once again, I have to remind you that we’re still in active development on the pack and so some things may change between now and the final game. Now, let’s talk about some nifty knits!

READ IT I PROMISE YOU GONNA LIKE IT!

In order to start knitting, you’ll need to purchase a Yarn Basket from the Build/Buy catalog. You probably remember voting on these baskets a while back. This was the winning design, presented to you now in all its colorful glory! Don’t like color? That’s okay, because we included a solid black and white variant.

We have one more knitting basket coming too! Remember this one?

The basket acts as the crafting catalyst(neat term, huh?) similar to the Easel or Woodworking Bench in The Sims 4 base game. But unlike those examples, the Yarn Basket is meant to live in a Sim’s inventory so that they can take their knitting anywhere they want to go. Knitting itself is relatively straightforward: click on the Yarn Basket in your inventory, OR, with the basket in your inventory, click on the chair you want to sit in while knitting (perhaps a rocking chair?) and select the Knit interaction. Your projects are saved to your Sim, so you can pause your progress at any time and resume later, and even juggle multiple projects at once. Starting a project costs a small amount of Simoleons for the cost of yarn, but nothing too outrageous.

(Children can knit too!) As a Sim levels up their knitting skill they’ll have access to new patterns. They’ll start with knitting socks and beanies, but as they grow more skilled they can tackle more challenging projects like sweaters and toys for kids. But if you only want to specialize in one thing - perhaps knitted mailbox cozies? - that's fine too! Just keep knitting anything and everything, and you’ll be level 10 before you know it. Speaking of knitting skill, sometimes your skill is reflected in your knitted work, or rather your lack of skill. Knitting projects can fail, and when they fail they can get weird. But it’s all subjective, and maybe you’ll end up accidentally knitting the cutest derpy companion, or the perfectly itchy sweater. No mistakes, only happy accidents!

(Just own it.) One of the niftiest parts of the knitting skill is unlocking the ability to Teach to Knit, where Sims sit down together and have a knitting pow-wow. We wanted this to feel special, so we got a really sweet animation for it (Thanks Haeju!). Now that you can infect other Sims with the knitting bug, no yarn ball will be safe!

(The knitting needles aren’t finished on the Teach To Knit interaction yet, but trust me it's SUPER CUTE.) So, what can you do with all these knitting projects? Lots of stuff! Not only can knitted objects be listed on Plopsy, but you can also Donate them to charity. If you want to surprise a loved one, try Gifting a knitted object too. If you want to destroy all traces of your knitted failures, you can Frog the object and start again! If it's a particularly nice Sweater that you made, consider Adding it to Wardrobe to make it available in Create-A-Sim to all family members.

(Everyone appreciates a nice gift!) We want Sims to be able to knit something for their whole family. Not only will Sims be able to knit Toddler Onesies, but Baby Onesies as well. So put your little grubworm in a handmade knitted outfit. I’m sure they’d thank us if they could! (And if they didn’t like it I’m sure they’d be polite about it.)

(Here’s a sneak peek at some of the concept art for new clothing for the littlest of Sims!) It also felt like a good idea to add an Aspiration to tie this passion for knitting all together. So if you want to master the fuzzy art of knitting, consider signing your Sim up for the Lord(or Lady) of the Knits Aspiration. With yarn running through your veins, there will be no knitting mountain too hard to conquer! Master the Aspiration and you’ll be rewarded with the Sacred Knitting Knowledge trait. What does it do? Lots of stuff! What does it unlock? Something special! Am I being vague? I am! Come on guys, I can’t share all the secrets quite yet.

As I’ve mentioned previously, we’re trying to get as much cross-pack functionality for knitting as we can. Cats can play with Yarn Baskets and Yarn Balls, there will be new Club rules for Knitting, new class electives at University, and knitting counts for Emotional Control, just to name a few. I’m hoping Knitting feels nice and snug alongside our other gameplay systems. Now let's have a chat with our lead Object Modeler, Beth Mohler! Conor: Can you tell us a little bit about what an Object Modeler does on The Sims 4? Beth: As an object modeler I spend a lot of time trying to figure out how to make objects work in The Sims 4. This is actually a very involved process, and somewhat different from the wonderful work our environment team does. We work with designers, concept artists, engineers, animators, vfx artists (basically everyone!) to make sure that Sims can use an object properly in an animation, or that all of our objects will work with each other. Once we understand the design for a new object, we will create a rig, a block model (a very generic version of the object used to help us make more of the same object in the future), and a footprint (tells us where the object can go and how Sims move around it). Once those are tested by animators and other disciplines we can model the final version, create UVs, and add textures. We also hook up and test everything in the game to make sure it all looks good. There is a lot to think about when it comes to making objects because we know players can find so many interesting ways to place and use them in game. That makes it a very fun challenge to make them work with everything else we’ve built before. Conor: What feature are you most excited to work on in Nifty Knitting Stuff? Beth: I’d say I am most excited to work on the rocking chairs! I love that we are bringing them to the game and can’t wait to see them in some cozy living rooms or on porches. Conor: What are some of the challenges you are facing working on this pack? Beth: One of the biggest challenges is ensuring that the knitting itself looks good and is fun to watch! This is a challenge given that it needs to work for everything you can create. Figuring this out takes a lot of iteration between modeling, animation, engineering, design, and art direction so that we come to a conclusion that will work the best given our time and technical constraints. Another interesting “challenge” is the fact that I crochet as a hobby myself! When you are knowledgeable about something (yarn!) in real life, working on it in the game it can sometimes be hard to separate the things you know and may expect in reality from what is possible or best within a video game. I have to make sure to keep a balance and to conceptualize how we can best convert the knitting experience into The Sims 4. As someone who also generally enjoys interior design and architecture, this is actually one of my favorite challenges and one of the things I love about working on objects in The Sims 4. Conor: What is your favorite feature you have ever worked on in The Sims 4? Beth: I think it has to be a tie between the mini fridge or the robotics table in Discover University. That pack was the first time I got to really take an entire feature from start to finish. I’ve been with Maxis for a while, but I’m relatively new to The Sims 4. Both of these objects had some complex features we wanted that required a lot of iteration. I learned a ton about the technical aspects of our game during the process as well. I’ve also worked on a few very cool things between then and now, but those can’t be shared yet ; ) As a fan of The Sims since the very beginning I am so happy to be able to share a little about what I do on a daily basis on The Sims 4 with you! I haven’t been on The Sims 4 for quite as long overall, but some of you may also recognize me from my time on Sims Mobile where I shared some of our workflows on Twitter for making a juice bar. Thanks! Conor: You shared a screenshot of the In-Progress Rocking Chair in our Rocking Chair Deep Dive. Can you share an updated screenshot now that the Rocking Chair is further along? Beth: I would love to! I hope everyone has been enjoying seeing the progress on this object so far! Here it is a little further along. This program allows us to set the rules for the object materials, footprint size and rig it should use, as well as all the color variants and swatch colors you see in the catalog.

Thanks Beth! By the way, Beth is on Twitter @SimGuruBeth, so be sure to Follow her! And thanks to all of you Simmers for following this pack’s development, this has been a really fun project in a very crazy time. A big thank you to my Stuff Pack teammates, and especially SimGuruSarah who edited my inane ramblings and wrangled the miscellaneous bits for these posts. While this concludes my design Deep Dives, we still have more forum posts with development insights on the way! Keep checking the Community Stuff Pack forum and we’ll have more fun stuff to show off in the weeks to come. Until next time, SimGuruConor

Source: The Sims Forum

[smownan]

a little late but here’s my 2021 Canned Coffee Wrapped

1. La Colombe Nitro Cold Brew - THIS. is THE quintessential canned coffee experience. It is so rich yet so light. Like drinking a 3 Musketeers. perfect flavor balance too, not too sweet, not too acidic, not too bitter. The only shame is that the cans are so small because i want to be hooked up to an IV tube of this shit. Also they used to come with a plastic sippy lid at the top that tried emulated to-go cup lids and to be honest it made them so intimidating on the shelf. Like it’s an aluminum can, it doesn’t need a tiara. the first time i had one actually took the lid off because i thought it was like. an extra seal or something. But damn thats good coffee. 9/10

2. 7-Select (7-11 brand) Cold Brew - I’m actually drinking one of these right now. I was pleasantly surprised when I first tried one, they’re probably the best canned coffees you can buy at 7-11, not to mention the cheapest. (that being said, 7-11 doesn’t have a superstar selection). They have a weird acidic aftertaste, probably because they use lactose-free milk and so the acid in the coffee isn’t neutralized effectively, but it tastes great otherwise, it’s a little on the sweeter side because they use a fair amount of sugar, but it’s cane sugar so you won’t die. Or maybe you will, you’re the master of your own destiny. 8/10

3. Starbucks Frappuccino - These are pretty good, but I’m not drinking them because I want coffee; I’m drinking them because I’m 8 years old and I want to feel like a sophisticated coffee drinking adult. The buzz doesn’t even come from the caffeine, it’s all from the sugar. Seriously, if these didn’t come in glass bottles with starbucks’ macbook-toting college tryhard reputation attached, they would come in plastic sippy bottles ergonomically designed for baby hands with Elsa and Spiderman as mascots. These are kids drinks masquerading as coffee. But they’re great if you want a thin milkshake. 6/10

4. High Brew Double Espresso - Okay so High Brew’s main selling point is that they’re based in Austin which, as a city, is the bottomfeeder sustaining itself off of Portland’s decaying corpse. The coffee itself I’ve had one time and, like most things from Austin, it’s painfully boring and trying to upsell itself with a vaguely rockabilly Americana motif that’s been sanitized to hell to appeal to hip twitter parents with bitcoin trust funds for their chicken nugget babies. 5/10

5. Rise Nitro Cold Brew - Oh your can “roars” when you pop it open? Because it’s so “fresh”? Well it tastes like shit. And switch to 2% for your milk coffees, oat milk is just white water and it makes me want to pour it out in the street. At least the cans are small so I don’t have to be saddled with this burden for too long. And I will say the caffeine content is mellow and manageable, I think 80mg compared to the average 170mg for the rest of the list. 4/10

6. Starbucks Doubleshot Espresso - The actual “coffee” tastes fine and the caffeine buzz is a lot, but not unbearable. I put coffee in air quotes because, again, starbucks drinks tend to be more like sugar milk with a splash of coffee, but the cans aren’t quite as sugary milky as the Frapps. I wouldnt mind drinking these if they weren’t a one-way ticket to the worst diarrhea you’ve ever had in your life. These should be legally required to come with a surgeon general’s warning. These aren’t drinks, these are a promise that you’re gonna spend your Friday night doubled over on the toilet. 3/10

7. Black Rifle Espresso - okay so this would be the perfect canned coffee if not for black rifle sponsoring some of the most contemptuous right-wing chodes in america and being the epitome of gendered male-centric branding, even worse than Dr Pepper 10’s “it’s not for women”. seriously all my gripes are with the black rifle company but fuuuuuuuck the actual coffee is so good. its on the creamier side and yet it doesnt give me any stomach trouble like most lactose milk coffees do so i have to commend them for thinking about how my Man Stomach might reject Cream. It’s the perfect size can, lots of caffeine, tastes great… I just wish it wasn’t Black Rifle. 2/10

8. KITU Super Coffee - Outrageously expensive. And there is so much sugar in here you can feel the undissolved granules on your tongue. Sweet like candy and acidic like nuclear waste. Imagine if sour patch kids had a coffee flavor. And why does the brand name sound like the station code for a local news channel? You will have a heart attack and die if you drink this and you will have drained your life savings for it. 1/10

[muqiing]

tagged by @leonzhng​ thanks for making me dig through my most embarrassing crushes 😭✋

i’ll tag @highwarlockkareena​ @yibobibo​ @lan-xichens​ @purplexedhuman​ @aheartfullofjolllly​ @lanzhansmiles​ @nyx4​ i feel like i tag you guys in everything i am so sorry please ignore this if u don’t wanna do it !!

putting this under a read more for reasons

MEN 2010 – 2016

literally nothing more embarrassing than falling on the same type of white man over and over again (with the exception of minho from shinee bless his heart)

tommy joe ratliff → he was the bass player for adam lambert during his glamnation era (think of songs like for your entertainment and if i had you) idk why exactly i liked him so much but i just did.... however i searched him up again quite recently and found out he’s one of those republicans that says the dumbest shit on twitter so Big Yikes

harry styles → “baby you light up my world like nobody else, the way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed, and when you smile at the ground it ain’t hard to tell...” and BOOM 13-year-old me was sold for well over two years

louis tomlinson → basically i liked harry most until around 2013 when for some reason i started to like him a little less, and i got more focused on louis tomlinson, and although i didn’t like one direction anymore louis tomlinson always had a special place in my heart

ashton irwin → so ashton is 5sos’ drummer, i discovered 5sos through one direction & i stanned them until late 2014

harries twins → the harries twins (jack & finn) are basically the reason i started spending a lot of time on youtube, they were funny and pretty and they just had good videos in general, so for almost two years i’d watch their content regularly

choi minho → my first steps into kpop happened bc i was watching videos on youtube (most probably the harries twins) and suddenly i saw the sherlock mv in my recommended videos so i clicked on it and then 14-year-old me proceeded to fall for minho like an idiot

brooks twins → still youtubers, the brooks twins were 3/5 of the janoskians (jai & luke brooks, beau brooks, daniel sahyounie, & james yammouni), an australian youtube comedy group that was active from 2011-2018 though i was only around from 2012-2014 (when jai brooks was dating ariana grande)

jc caylen → surprise! another youtuber! jc caylen was part of o2l (our2ndlife) a youtube collaboration channel on which each of the 6 members posted videos on a certain day in the week (mondays with connor, tuesdays with ricky, wednesdays with sam, thursdays with jc, fridays with trevi (my 2nd favorite member bc she participated on the x factor), saturdays with ricardo, and then they had surprise sundays every week) and i remember how much joy jc & the others always brought me with their silly videos

misha collins → up next, you might know him as the gay angel that was sent to superhell after confessing his love to the homophobic hunter on supernatural, it’s misha collins! basically misha was a huge source of comfort for me, and i even went around calling myself emmisha for almost two full years (cringe)

henrik holm → he played even bech naesheim in skam and my crush on him reached that level of ridiculousness where i actually tried my hand at learning norwegian (i can only remember how to introduce myself and some curse words i would make a great first impression on him)

MEN 2016 – 2021

min yoongi → okay so my baby steps into kpop happened through shinee’s sherlock, but i only got really invested when yoongi dropped agust d 1 because Holy Fuck y’know??

kim namjoon → oh man i remember thinking namjoon was cute and a very good leader and then BAM he dressed like THAT at the 2016 mma’s and i fell in love. hard

park seojoon → i started liking park seojoon whilst i was watching hwarang (you guessed it, i watched it bc of taehyung), although he wasn’t my favorite character by far, but he was very silly off camera & i liked that (i’m not that into him anymore tho </3)

kim seokjin → OH BOY LET ME TELL U i liked seokjin from the very beginning (i got to know bts in late 2014) and i always liked seeing him perform and be himself and god once i realized i had a crush on him it just hit me like a mf truck, and he’s still one of my favorite people to this day

jung hoseok → god fake love era hoseok really hits different.... also yes i know i have all of bts’ hyung line on my list BUT bts was a really big part of my life for almost 6 years soooo honestly they deserve it i still think they’re great guys

choi san → when ateez made their debut in 2018 i immediately fell in love with san, he was such an amazing dancer and he captivated me right from the very beginning, to this day he’s still my bias in ateez uwu

xiao zhan → AND THEN, OCTOBER OF 2019 HAPPENS AND I WATCH CQL AND... i fall in love with xiao zhan, something i’d never expected would happen bc when i watched cql for the first time i wasn’t as invested in the story, but i really really really liked xiao zhan and one thing led to another and now here i am as a xfx

wang yibo → the thing is, i’ve known yibo since eoeo except i didn’t know cql yibo was uniq yibo (bc i’d forgotten his name) and when i looked it up i can tell you my jaw dropped to the floor bc holy shit????? also he is very silly and i love him loads ok

lee minho → ah, the man who has been my skz bias since 2018, not only is minho my bias i also kin him (there’s a lot of aspects of myself that i see in minho and vice versa) and he’s very comforting to me

bang chan → honestly, it was only a matter of time before i’d fall for bang chan, i knew the moment i got into skz again that i’d start biasing him and, well, here i am, double biasing chan & minho

WOMEN

this list is shorter bc i’ve in general always had less crushes on women than on men??? blame society forcing me into thinking i was straight for a LONG time

ariana grande → remember the 2011 layout of twitter?? where u could not only have an icon and a header, but also a background and ur twitter page was smack in the center of ur screen with the big ugly menu bar at the top??? yeah ariana grande was always my background for my l*rr* st*l*n*s*n layouts

perrie edwards → this was right around the time she was dating zayn & little mix was breaking out into the spotlight, yeah i just really loved her

andrea russett → okay so remember o2l?? andrea russett was kian’s girlfriend for a pretty long time and they always did videos together and i always thought she was super pretty

lily collins → maybe i don’t like clary in tmi all that much but i sure liked the way lily collins looked

alona tal → MY BISEXUAL AWAKENING, it’s only when i saw alona tal in spn that i realized, fuck i might be gay

park jihyo → i discovered twice (my 2nd jype group after day6) through the like ooh-ahh mv and red-haired jihyo really did something to my heart (i just rewatched it and god zombie bang chan is so mf cute)

kim jisoo → when bp made their square two comeback i was immediately smitten for red-haired jisoo in playing with fire, it’s also when i realized she was my bias out of the four members

shin ryujin → the reason that i have blue hair is partially bc of ryujin and her amazing intro in wannabe :D

xuan lu → her portrayal of jiang yanli was SO ON POINT and she’s just such a kindhearted wonderful person wow i want her hand in marriage

lee yoobin → god i’ve known dreamcatcher from back when they were still called minx and ever since i’ve always looked at dami that bit more than the rest, i was also able to see dreamcatcher live in october of 2019 and the whole experience was just so amazing !!

FICTIONAL CHARACTERS

there’s a whole lot more than just these 10 but i wanted to fit the evolution into one (1) slide as best as i could lmao

peter pan → this movie came out in 2003 (?) and he’s honestly the first fictional character i remember ever having a crush on

legolas → i was really doubting between placing haldir or legolas here but i only really got a vague haldir obsession when i was like 14

zuko → LOOK. ZUKO IN ATLA? HOT. ZUKO IN LOK? HOT EVEN IF HE’S AN OLD MAN.

will turner → man was annoying sometimes but i really liked him and his relationship with elizabeth was cute

jo harvelle → gosh i can’t believe she’s the only female character in here???? yeah she was one of my two spn faves and i’ll never forgive the screenwriters for the way they killed her off

castiel → does your fave ever get sent to super hell for being gay? no? well. mine did

kili → fili and kili’s storyline tore my heart out, spit on it, and then laughed straight in my face, KILI WAS LITERALLY MY FAVORITE DWARF

howl → i only watched this movie for the first time in 2020 so i kinda fucked up the tl cause i watched cql in 2019 but shh, anyways howl with his blonde hair was good looking but howl with his black hair just hits differently. i want a howl

lan jingyi → MY BABY BOY, TINIE LITTLE BABIE WHOMST I MUST PROTECT ok no but seriously this kid. i love him a lot

mu qing → BARK BARK. that’s all (that’s not all i love him a whole lot and it hurts me to see so many people misunderstand his character and only see the bad parts of him when they can forgive others for fucking up (eg. xie lian himself & feng xin) but bc mu qing doesn’t deal well with emotions suddenly he’s the bad guy??? i s2g if ppl are gonna do to him what they did to jiang cheng in the tgcf la i will RIOT)

[nothlits-archive]

Zoe lunarsystem13 / lunar_system13 / lemonscenteddaves / zazberry is a dangerous person.

Other names they may go by are Raven, Cassandra, Luna, and various other system member names but they primarily identify themself as Zoe or the Lunar System and frequently use the number 13 and blue and purple heart emojis as an identifier. As far as I know they are only active on tiktok now, but do have Twitter and Instagram accounts under the above usernames.

This isn't to get attention or to be petty about anything. I just want to be fully open about my experience and I want to be able to explain my feelings concisely in one place. The biggest reason I'm writing this is because I am scared that Zoe will do to other people what they did to me, because they've shown themself to be unrepentant. I attempted to bring things up with them privately when we were still on speaking terms and it resulted in gaslighting about past situations and a complete refusal to listen to or speak to me ending in uninstalling discord to avoid me.

Content warnings for abuse, gaslighting, disordered eating, hospitalization, drugs, alcohol, sexual harassment, cheating, mentions of death. 

Zoe and I dated for about two years from 2018-2020. We broke up in January 2020 and were on speaking terms until early May. We initially broke up amicably because I felt emotionally neglected and wanted to give Zoe the space they needed to work on some personal problems they'd been struggling with for some time by that point. We agreed they needed more time to themself and didn't have the energy to expend on both self betterment and a partner. I wanted to stay friends with them and stop letting myself get hurt by an absent partner. 

A few weeks after breaking up, Zoe and I got into an altercation where it came out that Zoe had, for the entire duration of our relationship, felt that I would never have been able to meet their needs emotionally no matter what I did and elected to never share this with me or end the relationship. They told me they would eventually just make up for my shortcomings by "getting another partner". Zoe and I were both polyamorous, but this is NOT how I practice polyamory and I didn't think it was how they practiced it either. This totally broke me. 

After this, Zoe blocked me on Twitter and discord. Without apologizing to me for anything, they began messaging every friend of mine they had contact info for, "apologizing" for hurting me and trying to spread a narrative that I was telling people the wrong information about them to make them look bad. Some of the people they messaged were people I did not talk to about my personal life and who had no idea that we had even fallen out. Some of them were my closest friends, who thankfully knew Zoe was full of shit and blocked them. They messaged my boyfriend and told him that they thought I'd only started dating him to get back at them for not reading my fanfiction, a claim that absolutely gutted me as it was never something on my mind and I would NEVER commit to a relationship for the sake of petty revenge over a fanfiction. 

I had to message them from a second Twitter account to ask them about what to do with all of their belongings I still had and tell them not to worry about returning mine. I also messaged them that way to explain that what they'd done and said had devastated me and to reprimand them for messaging my friends weird shit about our personal business. They initially completely ignored me for multiple days until I texted their phone and asked them to let me know if they'd read my message so that I could move on and stop worrying about it all. 

When they finally responded, it was with hostility and they only stopped slinging accusations about me when I told them I didn't see them as a bad person (a statement soon to change). We tentatively made up after they did one of their infamous 180s on me and apologized profusely to me, claiming they understood what they did was wrong now. Debatable.

This is where I think it's important to go into the content of our relationship. At the time of it all happening, I felt our relationship was healthy and stable. But red flags are hard to see when you're in it. 

Zoe is a highly manipulative and narcissistic person. If you look up covert narcissism, they fit the bill 100%. They lie intentionally and consistently in order to make themself look innocent. They gaslight people to play the victim. They repeatedly put me into positions where my only option was to comfort them while ignoring my own feelings. If I stood up for myself or got upset at their behavior, I was told I was being cold or they would throw a tantrum about how traumatized they are and how they can't help it. I entered into a second relationship about a year into ours. Zoe was fully aware of and initially supportive of this, but after some time, any time I would bring up my other partner, Zoe would dissolve into accusations that I was going to leave them, accusations that I was ignoring them for my other partner, complaints that because of their disabilities they weren't as good (a repeated subject for them, which I always, always reassured them was not the case and it never was): all of this in order to obtain comfort from me over the existence of someone else in my life. 

At one point, my boyfriend was considering moving out of his unhealthy home to live with a family member over an hour away from me and Zoe went off the rails to both of us, telling us it wasn't fair for us to be near each other in person if they couldn't be there, how they'd been dating me longer so it was their right to be with me first, how my boyfriend should have to stay where he was even though it was a bad environment for him. This was not a plan. It was a vaguely mentioned idea. Nothing ever came of it. Zoe apologized for this, but their possessive behavior never stopped. This interaction made me feel like an object, not a person they supposedly loved. 

Another time, after visiting me, Zoe began harassing me over needing to be able to house them so they could move down to be with me permanently. They expected this to happen in a matter of months. Zoe is disabled and cannot work and at the time did not receive any government assistance. I work in retail and at the time was living with a friend's family. I did not have my own place. I could not afford to singlehandedly support myself, let alone two people. I told Zoe this, and they told me that if I didn't figure it out they were going to die. This devastated me. I cried for hours because of how bad they were making me feel over something out of my control. I could barely type out responses to them besides asking them to stop and apologizing, but Zoe kept telling me that I was acting like I didn't care and was choosing to give up on them.

After this passed, they did what they always did and flipped to affection flooding me: "I'm so sorry baby, it's okay, you didn't do anything wrong at all, I love you so much and know you're trying so hard". 

This sort of on/off behavior was constant. I never knew what was real, or if I'd actually done something wrong, or if Zoe was going to go off on me over the slightest thing. I brought this up to them multiple times. A lot of the time it was met with "I can't help it." Other times, they would apologize and then continue the same behavior. 

I first started telling them I was feeling neglected in October 2019. Nothing changed. When we broke up in January 2020 they told me I never gave them the chance to change or fix anything. They then told me the problems I was having were inherent to their dissociative disorder so it wasn't their fault. They also told me that me breaking up with them made them feel like there was no reason to go on, presumably to make me feel guilty for ending a clearly toxic relationship where they clearly still weren't learning what they were doing was wrong. 

Zoe would frequently accuse me of things I hadn't done and then behave as if those accusations were true. Not limited to: agreeing to mod a discord server my boyfriend made just to keep them out of it on purpose (the link was shared publicly on Twitter where they followed both of us and the server was 3 hours old when they confronted me), abandoning them and not talking to them at all for a week when I was extremely busy every day (I spoke to them at length every single day that week and was not unreachable at any point), many many instances of only being with my boyfriend because I saw them as not good enough due to disability (never true, ever). This led to me never being able to understand my own behavior because Zoe always acted as if I was doing something wrong regardless of whether I was or not. I was guilt tripped a lot for things I didn't even do. I believe Zoe is delusional and genuinely believed these things to be true, but that doesn't change that it hurt and scarred me to be treated this way for so long.

Zoe lied to me about their whereabouts and health frequently. Zoe has DID and many physical health problems they haven't been properly diagnosed yet because of the complex nature of their symptoms. I will not deny Zoe is disabled mentally or physically. But they often used this as a way to get pity or to guilt trip me. Near the end of our relationship, they would disappear for sometimes 14+ hours at a time with no warning. Because of this, I stopped reaching out to them about my feelings or trying to talk to them about anything serious because I had developed a sort of learned helplessness. If I felt that my partner was unreachable, I would spare myself the pain of reaching out and being ignored. My mental health was very poor at this time and I was struggling with my pet being sick and nearly dying. Zoe would tell me they were just sleeping a lot. I knew they were sick and often slept long periods, so I didn't push it but I did keep to myself. They became angry at me for not reaching out to them and told me they couldn't be there for me if I didn't reach out to them and that I didn't want them around. It was a cycle, and I'll admit that I contributed to it, but I did it to protect myself. This is all important because one of Zoe's alters soon told me that Zoe had been lying to me about sleeping and was actually just trying to intentionally keep me from knowing what was really going on, which I won't share because it's not relevant. Finding out my partner was lying to me when they were already being very absent in my life was a hard thing to handle. 

Zoe would also go on to lie about intentionally not eating when they'd told it to me as being physically unable to keep food down because of their Celiac's and lying to me about the length of a serious decline in health that ultimately put them in the hospital. When my pet rabbit, who is like a human child to me, was on the verge of death, Zoe messaged me telling me they were scared they were about to die. When I told them bluntly that they needed to go to the hospital if they truly felt that way, they told me I hurt their feelings and that they didn't literally think they were dying and only said that to me so I'd tell them they weren't dying. While they knew I was in a crisis over potentially losing a pet I consider to be my main emotional support for nearly a decade. Their selfishness is truly limitless and if they think anyone or anything is infringing on their victimhood, they will do whatever they can to get pity and attention.

I cannot confirm that this is a lie, but I have my suspicions about it and it's a toxic situation regardless of whether lying comes into play or not. When Zoe visited me for the first time, they were determined to get and use my thc vape pen. In the past, Zoe told me that weed (and specifically thc) caused them to have seizures and so they did not use it anymore. Because I'd been fed this narrative of how scary the seizures were and how dangerous it was for them and how they couldn't have it anymore, I refused to give them my pen. When I realized how desperate they were, I even hid it. I had to go to work for a few hours one night while they stayed in my home (again, where I live with a friend's family). They became unstable and were essentially begging me to use the pen. I repeatedly said no, saying I wasn't going to be responsible for them having a seizure. They still kept pushing me. Eventually they moved on to threatening to drink alcohol in the house that did not belong to me. They threatened to walk to a liquor store (there isn't one within walking distance and they were all closed). They were unrelenting about the pen. Eventually I gave in because I loved them and they were hurting. They did not have a seizure. I know that now they smoke weed constantly. There's no real proof that they lied to me. It's possible they were misinformed or their health has changed. But they have a long record of lying to look like a victim, and it still stands that they guilt tripped me and cried to me and begged me to give them a substance they had told me would make them sick until I gave in to them. They have openly admitted to intentional automatic lying and see this as being to their benefit.

Despite claiming to be asexual now (they did not for the duration of our relationship), Zoe sexually harassed both my boyfriend and a close friend of mine who I won't name for their privacy. Zoe would send sexual messages to both and sent images and shared nsfw content with one of them without considering boundaries or discomfort of the recipient. They badly triggered my boyfriend and ruined their relationship with him by being predatory. I mention this because I don't want the label of asexual to make anyone think Zoe isn't fully capable of being sexually inappropriate with people. They have a short track record of it. After the incident with my boyfriend, Zoe told me that THEY felt like their heart was being broken and that my boyfriend had manipulated them by being triggered by Zoe's predation. They expected me to comfort them over this and I refused. The entire scenario was brought up to me vaguely with Zoe refusing to give details and trying to simultaneously act as if they were the worst person who'd ever existed and like they were the one being hurt and deserved pity and comfort for being inappropriate. Despite the polyamorous nature of our relationship, I do consider going behind my back to be sexual with my boyfriend to be cheating. Zoe has in the past been accused of cheating by their first ex. They maintain that they didn't, but knowing what I know now about their issues with boundaries, I'm not sure.

In May, I finally decided to try to confront Zoe about the ways they'd hurt me. I brought it up to them in the context of wanting to make them aware of the ways their behaviors could hurt others going forward. Zoe has always been at least outwardly very about doing better and believing people about trauma and trying to fix your mistakes (yes, I realize how stupid I was to believe this now). I thought they would be open to listening to me so they could try to avoid hurting someone else the way I felt hurt. The way this conversation ended up going gutted me worse than anything else has with them. Worse than being told I'd never be good enough. Because it was like the person I knew was just completely gone and I didn't know them at all anymore. 

I brought up the on and off flipping behavior, the emotional manipulation, I provided a screencap of the conversation where they backed me into a corner about needing to figure out how to house them as an example. They responded by telling me I misunderstood the conversation and should've just apologized to them more and been nicer so they wouldn't feel like I didn't care (again, I'd been sobbing uncontrollably and could barely type responses which were mostly "stop", "I'm sorry"). Zoe refused to listen to me about my own trauma. They shut me down. The conversation ended with them telling me I was making them too angry and they'd be back later. They ignored me for four days and, I found out later, uninstalled discord completely to avoid having to read my messages. Instead of having a real-time conversation where we could actually hash things out and I could feel heard if not understood, I resorted to typing up all of my feelings in one message, telling them this was the last I'd be speaking to them because I couldn't keep torturing myself thinking we could be friends, and sent it. 

They replied to me via Twitter days later with a non-apology about how I just don't understand what it's like to have DID and telling me that they don't spend any time thinking about me or what they did to me because they are just so sick that they can't manage it.

This broke me, completely.

Figuring all of this out has been an ongoing process. I truly believed our relationship to be healthy until I began examining things while trying to heal, and realizing the wound just kept going deeper and deeper and deeper. It's been months now since we've spoken and I still can't process everything. I am constantly remembering more fucked up things they said or did to me or my friends. I don't feel like I need to document all of it, especially since it spans such a long time, I only need to give examples of repeated problem behaviors they have given no indication of changing. 

They are gaining a sizeable following on tiktok and that's what scares me. They are so manipulative and cruel and blind to other people's emotions or boundaries. They are self-important and refuse to be told that they're wrong about anything. They will do whatever they can in order to look blameless and innocent. They now claim an identity of self-actualization and I've seen a video where they try to posit that my life is "going poorly" because I don't believe in their religion and listen to a specific podcast about debunking pseudoscience. This is funnier than it is upsetting until you realize it's the same "your life sucks because you don't have the same belief system as me" argument Christians use constantly. Zoe made this statement knowing the trauma I went through regarding religion in childhood. So thanks for that one. It's minor comparatively but it's incredibly tone-deaf and a great example of their eagerness to seem like others are beneath them for arbitrary reasons. 

Zoe does not, as far as I know, have friends, really. All of mine dropped them once they realized what a manipulative person they are. But just knowing they are on a public platform worries me. I am an adult who has been severely traumatized repeatedly and I still fell into their trap. I don't want to think about what they could do if teens or otherwise more impressionable people came to be around them. They are big into social justice and try to seem harmless and allied with minorities to seem even less dangerous, but they absolutely are toxic and unable to acknowledge their wrongdoings in any real way. The last they told me, they were isolating themself to work on things. I don't know if this is true and I have no way of knowing.

I want to end this with self-accountability. I was not and am not perfect. When my relationship with Zoe began, I had just gotten out of an extremely traumatizing situation. I had acute severe dissociative episodes as well as hallucinations and very unstable mood in general as I was adjusting back to being in a safe(r) environment than I had been for the past year. I acted out and lashed out a lot. All of this was apologized for in the best way that I knew how and I have done my best to change my behavior going forward. I consider myself to be in a much better space now mentally. I am always willing to work on problem behavior as long as I'm made aware it exists. There are things I did wrong in this relationship, and I've thought a lot about it, questioning myself and catching myself in old ways of thinking to correct myself now in all of my relationships. I didn't write this to pretend like I did nothing wrong. I am not innocent. But not being innocent doesn't mean these things didn't happen to me, or that they couldn't happen to someone else if I don't at least try to warn people. 

Please don't message Zoe and definitely don't try to argue with them. Just don't engage with them. They've been given a chance to address their behavior maturely and they turned it down in favor of continuing to play the victim in public. Anyone trying to instigate anything with them is just going to give them more fuel to act that way. 

I have already been treated like a liar for some of this information or had people believe Zoe over me on whatever accusations they'd like to make about me. That's been damaging but there's nothing I can really do about it. I'm open to answering any questions but I'm also going to ask that if you do message me about this, please be civil about it. I'm putting myself in a vulnerable place by writing all of this and I am already scared of the outcome. But I routinely convince myself that I'm making things up because of the nature of being gaslit so much. So I needed a written record of that even if Zoe doesn't like it. 

If you read this, thank you. I've been internalizing a lot of things. Getting my experiences out somewhere concise will hopefully help my healing process. 

[heartshapedcreaturefromcriptoon]

Alright, so once again, this is the most recent post I could find vague blogging about me on her tumblr in regards to this specific issue so I don’t know where all the “Wow! heartshapedcreaturefromcriptoon DID THAT?!” Anons are coming from here, or how those anons are aware that you even tried to submit me something, unless you’re just sending them to yourself to try and stir more trouble but just ....

Leanne, Leanne, Leanna Leanne.... I feel as though I must para-quote Gene Wilder’s character in Young Frankenstein here because just what is the matter with you? Like do you not understand the concept of hyperbole at all? Don’t you know a joke when you read one?

The entire reason I screenshot that ask this way was to show case the fact that color and formatting of the ‘t”,  on what I didn’t know happened to be goth day just happened to match both the obnoxious eye sore color palette and theme of your tacky little blog, Princess. 

The whole coincidence gave me the willies, so I was just making a funny, honey.

Although, apparently, you can’t comprehend my humor or my kindness because now isn’t that part of what got you into this mess in the first place?

“Luna” is for long time mutuals only. Don’t pretend like we’ve ever spoken more than twice, and don’t pretend like you ever gave a damn about my well being when you can’t even get my disability right. My correct name and minority status is written all over my blog.  And to think you’re the one who bitched and complained to me about being called “Honey”.

I only found this on your blog because I have no way of responding to your original Submission even if I wanted to now because Tumblr seems to have eaten it (which, to that I say good riddance) and the only reason I found your Twitter is because it’s exactly the same as your gmail address due to the fact that you’re that basic. There wasn’t anything “random” about it.

“I would never send hate for no fucking reason...” Ah, but by that logic you would dish back hate to someone if you had a reason. So why would you like, concern troll me and chastise me for hate trolling someone when they gave me a reason?!

“And then to say that you that I would hack into your account? WHY??????? Why would I do that? I dont even know HOW to do that! YOU ARE TEARING MY HEART EMOJI APART LUNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Again, honey, please calm down and teach yourself how to form a coherent sentence, learn the concept of what a hyperbolic joke is, leave your fandom(s) and get a freaking life.

I thought you were my friend too until the night you pulled that shit with me, respect that I blocked you and frick off.

And for the love of God, stop “joking” about writing smutty fanfics between you and Al and getting “married” to him and delete all of Angel’s pictures from your blog why don’t you!

Your obsession with all of us is beyond unhealthy.

“I know that you have reason to listen or believe me...” Honey, I know that when you were typing this your little crocodile tears were hitting the keyboard so hard that you couldn’t even form a coherent sentence and you need to shut the fuck up. (Also SIDE NOTE of how Cletus and Striker are like, the worst Helluva Boss characters to have “taste” in: Some sleazy little man baby and an ever only slightly cooler and more tolerable Wild West Reincarnation of Toffee, I should have known you were like this. Oh and that Vampire Chick from RE7 everyone including yourself is into right now is like if Eclipsa was a freaking Fairly Odd Parents Pixie and Meteora would have her daughters for a snack, both figuratively and literally. Die Angry About it.)   

I had two whole interactions with you and I wanted to beat that bunny fursona of yours down with a tree branch Lilo and Stitch style the second you hopped into my ask box that night and 4 days later you gave me an excuse to. I only found out about the shit that you were putting my friends through when Orn started vague blogging to me about what you were doing to them after I exposed you as a snake in the grass arse little bitch and they had no reason to try and White Knight you.

In starlatte27’s case she was just tagged to help attack me by the same stalker that you were going out of your way to defend and latte blocked me before I could even so much as figure out who she was, meaning we didn’t even have an “altercation”, her existence to me personally at that point was merely a blip that served to cause me more disorientation and stress, but I knew she was just as much of a bitch as you were before my friends did and now you’re both causing them immeasurable harm in comparison to what I was put through and you both need to delete your blogs after you apologize. NOBODY WANTS YOU TWO IN THIS FANDOM!

I have absolutely no interest whatsoever in reading you reiterate your excuses for your racism and gross mistreatment towards my friends to me, nor do I care for your off putting arse attempting to have some sort of petty, infantilizing, paternalistic, para-social relationship with me!

Angel and Al, may I add, haven’t been online in weeks because of you and starlatte27, and now you’re only trying to get to me because I’ve still been available online and you’ve been bored. And if I had the capability and privilege of doing anything other than sitting, I can tell you that I certainly wouldn’t be in front of a computer right now if I actually even had the option not to be ether.

And for your information, being able to meet Angel and Al, at least out of all this mess in the first place, has been the only good experience that I’ve had within in this fandom thus far and their presence on my dashboard only makes my day brighter, I willingly shared my experiences with them to let know they’re not alone in all this shit.  

Stop being a sleaze to Angel just because he’s more attractive than you and clearly not white passing, and delete all his photos from your blog.

Stop being a skeeve to Al and stop making “jokes” about marrying him and your jokes about smut because that’s actually beyond the conception of “cringe”.

Stop infantalizing me and acting as though you have some weird parental para-social relationship over me or some shit when I’m freaking three years older than you are, apologize to all three of us before deleting your accounts and dropping off the internet why don’t you and then leave all three of us the fuck alone!!! 

I can tell how the little twit whom said this to me the other day has certainly never met you.

[outshinethestars]

Germany gets to have a Nice, Relaxing Day for Once (Hetalia, Immortal Prussia au)

Germany woke the next morning to find Prussia sitting on the kitchen counter.  

“You’re up early,” Germany said in sleep-fuzzy surprise.

“It’s six-thirty already,” Prussia said, “You slept in.”

“Mmm,”  Germany said.  Even so, Prussia usually slept until eight at least.  Just another reminder that until last night his brother had been literally on the brink of death.

“Coffee?”

“Please!”  Germany said.  Prussia handed him a mug.

“You really should do something about that caffeine addiction of yours,” Prussia said.

“I’ll make a note in my schedule,” Germany said, then, “You made breakfast,” the coffee having restored in him the ability to notice things.

“That I did,”  Prussia said proudly, “Who’s the awesomest big brother in the world?”

Prussia with breakfast ready for him when he got up, it was like being a kid again.  Germany smiled.

“Switzerland, probably,” he said.

Prussia pouted.  “I can’t believe I raised such a brat,” he said.

They took their time with breakfast, talking and relaxing.  It was nice.  

“So,” Prussia said as they finished, “What’s on the agenda today?” “Nothing,” Germany said, “I’m supposed to still be in the US. I suppose I should--”

“Awesome,” Prussia cut him off,  “You get a day off!  Go read a book or something.  After you reschedule with America, I guess.” “I’ll email him this afternoon,” Germany said, “It’s one am his time.”

“Oh, he’s definitely still awake,” Prussia said, “He has the worst sleep schedule of anyone I know.  You don’t have a sleep schedule so don’t look smug.”

Germany rolled his eyes, and made to start cleaning up the dishes.

“Don’t worry about that,” Prussia said, shooing him away, “I’ll clean up.  You go enjoy your luxurious one-day vacation.”

“You’re sure?” Germany asked.  Prussia had drilled into him quite firmly the idea that you did not leave the cleaning up for other people.

“Of course I’m sure.  Go!  Shoo!”

Germany shooed.  

Apart from the digs at Germany’s life choices, Prussia was being almost disturbingly nice.  Germany chose to enjoy it while it lasted.

Prussia was right about America still being awake.  He answered Germany’s email in under a minute, and they were in the middle of the deeply annoying and complicated process of rescheduling when he heard Prussia yell, “I’m going out!”

“Remember to wear sunscreen,” Germany yelled back.

“Yeah, yeah,” Prussia replied, and the door slammed.

Prussia hated sunscreen.  He loathed it with every fiber of his being.  He hated the way it smelled and he hated the way it felt even more.  It was just so incredibly gross .  He’d survived for centuries without it, and he saw no reason why he should have to start wearing it now.  Sunburn was annoying, sure, but he was used to it, and if he preferred his skin to be on fire than to cover it in slimy-sticky-ickiness, that was really none of Germany’s business.

However, at this point Prussia had no idea how he was still alive.  And, jokes aside, he had no idea in what sense he was alive either.  Was he human now?  Did God just… forget about him? He knew that last idea wasn’t how it worked, but he couldn’t think of any other explanations that made sense either.  Could he get cancer now?  Who knows!

So Prussia was wearing the damn sunscreen.  And a hat for good measure.

Prussia was going out.  He had vague ideas of buying groceries at some point, but mostly he just wanted to walk out his front door and continue to walk, and enjoy the fact that he could keep walking and look at his city without collapsing immediately from pain and exhaustion.

Gilbird flitted from Prussia’s shoulder to a tree and fluttered round his head, delighted at being out and about again.

“You’d better not die,” Prussia threatened him.  Theoretically he wouldn’t, he was still in close proximity to Germany.  Gilbird was an unusual case anyway, being around Nations tended to make animals age more slowly, but it didn’t usually make them stop aging entirely. In any case, Prussia suspected Gilbird was some sort of immortal cryptid creature in his own right, because he had no idea what sort of avian a Gilbird was supposed to be.  He mostly looked like a baby chicken, but obviously wasn’t.

Gilbird twittered at him cheerfully, as if he found the idea of dying funny.

They’d been enjoying themselves for about an hour when Prussia felt an odd buzzing sensation in his skull.

And then long-honed instinct had him ducking out of the way as a stranger, quick as lightning, pulled a sword from under his coat and tried to remove Prussia’s head from his body.

“What the fuck!” Prussia said, but he was already running.

Prussia was just minding his own business in a perfectly peaceful park when a stranger tried to decapitate him with a sword out of nowhere.  That didn’t happen!  Was this some sort of cosmic glitch?  Did some kind of heavenly bureaucratic error cause him to not die so now the universe was going to have to try to kill him off in increasingly unlikely ways?  What the fuck!

Prussia ran full tilt, with Gilbird twittering frantically above his head, in the direction of streets and people, with the hope that the murderous madman wouldn’t want to kill him in front of witnesses.  Prussia’s legs were shorter than the stranger’s but Prussia was good at running, and also, he was running for his life, which always gives you an edge.

Damn he’d missed this.

He slowed down when he reached a busy street with plenty of pedestrians, and fortunately the crazy guy hung back and didn’t attack him.  He did keep following him, though, despite all of Prussia’s efforts to lose him.

The smart thing at this point, Prussia knew, would be to go home, where he had a door that locked, and also weapons.  However, it was Germany’s day off.  Germany deserved a nice, relaxing, totally murderer free day off!

So, Prussia was not going to lead this guy back home.  He continued wandering around in an effort to get away, or at least make him lose interest.  Unfortunately the guy turned out to be both incredibly good at following a target (seriously, what was he, some kind of super spy?) and absolutely fixated on murdering Prussia specifically.

By noon, Prussia was eating lunch at a cafe, and the crazy sword murderer was glaring at him from across the street.  Prussia was resigning himself to the fact that he had no way to get the creep to stop following him.  He knew he really should just admit defeat and take a taxi home at this point.  But.  Germany’s Nice, Stress-Free Day!  Bringing home crazy sword murderers just wasn’t polite .

What Prussia did next was, in retrospect, quite possibly the stupidest choice he’d ever made, which is really, really saying something.  In his defense, he hadn’t known his stalker was potentially a trained killer with millennia of experience.  In his not-defence, he probably should have thought of the possibility.

Prussia pretended to get lost and ended up in an abandoned back alley on purpose.

As far as he knew, his attacker was just some guy with a sword.  He was the Awesome Prussia.  He could totally take some guy with a sword empty handed.

Unfortunately, it was immediately apparent that this man knew what he was doing.  It was all he could do for Prussia to dodge.  The alley was a dead end, so there was no escaping, and Prussia tried desperately to get inside his attacker’s guard with no luck.

The sword grazed him on the arm, and the cut healed with lightning sparking over his skin.

Fuck, Prussia finally realized he’s an Immortal, we’re Immortals , followed almost immediately by, Oh, shit, I’m gonna die. ( Almost immediately because his first thought was, Yay! I don’t have to wear sunscreen!)

Luckily for Prussia, this particular Immortal was somewhere in between Some Guy With a Sword and Millenia of experience, honed to a razor’s edge.  He was competent, but nothing special, and he was becoming increasingly frustrated that Prussia was not dead yet.  (What kind of Immortal didn’t carry a sword?  What kind of Immortal didn’t carry a sword and walked straight into a dead-end alley knowing he was being followed?  What kind of Immortal was that clueless and still this hard to kill? )

With his new perspective, Prussia was better able to assess his assailant’s weaknesses.  He was very experienced, but his experience was very narrow.  He was used to one-on-one sword fights, specifically one-on-one sword fights where both opponents were aiming for the head.  This left him with a few blind-spots.

Eventually, Prussia found his opening and charged, low to the ground with his head and neck forward and inside his opponent’s guard, ignoring the sword coming down to stab him in the back and bowling the enemy over onto the ground.  They grappled, Prussia using his bony elbows with great efficiency, until he had his opponent’s sword arm pinned down and pried the sword from his hand.

Prussia rolled to his feet and cut off his attacker’s head as he tried to stand.

Lightning flashed.

It was a feeling like taking new territory, that feeling of Who I Am being altered, added to with the lives of others, but somehow more .  More, intense, more personal, altering something on a deeper, wrong level.  There was a feeling of euphoric power, like winning a victory that history books would one day call a “Turning Point”, it was nothing like what being shot through with high voltages of electricity actually feels like, but a lot like how you would always half imagine it would feel like.

Prussia collapsed to the ground, panting.

“I am never doing that again,” he said.

Gilbird swooped down from where he had been hiding and swooped down to nestle in the hollow of Prussia’s neck comfortingly.

Immortals.  He was an Immortal.  It made sense, in its way.  Prussia had never heard of a Nation becoming an Immortal, but then nobody knew how Immortals worked in any case.   Many Nations didn’t even know that Immortals existed, and Prussia didn’t know if any Immortals knew of the existence of Nations.  

Prussia looked down at himself. “Shit,” he said.

His clothes were ripped and covered in blood, both his own and the other Immortal’s.  What was he going to tell Germany?

Nothing, he decided.  Germany didn’t need to know that anything had happened.

By some miracle, Prussia managed to buy a new shirt and pair of pants and change in a public restroom without anyone calling the cops on him.  It helped to act very calm and confident and polite, and not at all like someone who had just killed a dude in a back alley.  Most people probably thought he was wearing a very convincing costume of some sort.

Looking, once again, like a sane and law-abiding member of society, Prussia considered how he was going to explain his change of clothes.  An idea struck and he called North Italy.

“Hello, Prussia!  How are you today?”  Prussia briefly examined the “how are you today”, wondering how pointed it was, before discarding that train of thought.

“Hey, Veneziano,” he said, “If I were to tell Germany that I lost to you in a game of strip poker today, would you back me up?”

“... Why do you want Germany to think you lost a game of strip poker?”

“I might have had to change clothes because I got in a fight.  Just a little one.  But I don’t want Germany to worry.”

Italy sighed.  “Prussia,” he said, his voice concerned, “You know you shouldn’t do these things.  It’s not sensible, and it’s not responsible.  Please take better care of yourself.”

It was always a little shocking when Italy acted like some sort of older, wiser friend towards Prussia.  Like, “Yes, I knew you when you were a baby, and I was a baby too but also hundreds of years old, and even though you look older than me now, I know and you know that you aren’t actually.”

“I know, I know,” Prussia said, “If you’ll believe me, it wasn’t my fault. You won’t tell Germany, though, right?”

“What do you think I am, an idiot?”  Veneziano said, “Of course I won’t tell Germany.  And I’ll help you with your little lie.”

“Thank you,” Prussia said, “How much do I owe you?” “Owe you?”  Veneziano said, “Can’t you believe I’d do a favor for a friend just to be nice?”

“No, I can’t” Prussia said, “I’m not my brother, I know you.”

“That’s mean,”  Italy said, “Germany knows me very well.  Parts of me, anyway.  And,” he added, his voice tinged a little with sadness, “You really don’t need to owe me anything for this, Prussia.”

Prussia knew that Italy only said that because he felt sorry for him.  He thought that Prussia was dying and going down a self-destructive spiral so he wanted to be supportive.  Prussia’s enormous desire to not be in Italy’s debt warred with his desire not to take advantage of his misplaced pity.  The latter won.

“I’m not dying, Veneziano,” he said, “I was dying, but I got better.  I’m better now.”

“And because you suddenly didn’t feel awful, you went out and picked a fight with someone. Which is a really silly thing to do, and you don’t want Germany to know.  That is like you.  Okay, then, you’ll owe me a favor.”

“What sort of favor?”

“I’ll tell you when I think of one!”

“ What ?”

“Just a little one, promise.  You should learn to take advantage of people’s assumptions, Prussia.  Deal or no deal?”

“Fine, deal.”

“Excellent!” Italy said, then added thoughtfully, “There is one problem with this plan of yours, though.”

“What’s that?”

Italy giggled, “Germany won’t believe I beat you at poker. He thinks I’m an innocent.”

“Oh, come on, he isn’t that blind.  I did teach him history.”

“Yes, you taught him history.  I can imagine it right now,”  he pitched his voice high (higher) “‘Big brother Prussia?  How did Venice support itself after the trade routes changed and he lost all his terra firma land?”  And then you blush very red and you say, “Well, Little Germany, they… well, lots of people came to Venice for the uh… History!  Yes, the History, because Venice used to be so very important, you see, and they… they sold glass!  Venician glass is very famous!”  And then Germany frowns, because he is very clever, even as a baby, and says “Was that really enough to support the State?”  And you say,  “Yes, it is very expensive glass.”  No mention of gambling houses, and certainly nothing to do with prostitutes .  I bet you’re blushing right now just hearing the word!”

“Yes, well,”  Prussia said, “I guess I’ll have to besmirch your completely undeserved good name a little.”

“Oh, well!” Italy said, “I’m sure it will all work out somehow.”

Prussia was delighted to find Germany messing around with the engine of his car, which was the peak of leisure by Germany’s standards.

“What happened to your clothes?” Germany said when he saw him.

Prussia tried to look appropriately embarrassed.

“I ran into Italy,” he said, “And then I might, possibly, have lost terribly to him in a game of strip poker.”

Germany frowned, “If you ran into Italy, why didn’t you call me so I could join you?”

“Did you want to play strip poker?”

“No, you’re right, I would have stopped you from teaching Italy to play strip poker.  You really shouldn’t have done that.” “I didn’t teach him!  He suggested it, he wasn’t born yesterday, you know.”

Germany shook his head.  “I can’t believe you let him win,” he said fondly, “And you say I let him get away with too much.”

Prussia opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again, rather like a dying fish.  When Gilbert was just a little baby Holy Order, pure and innocent as the driven snow, it had been Venice who taught him how to gamble, and then how to gamble all his clothes away and come home naked and ashamed, swearing never to do anything so sinful and foolish again.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!?” he texted Italy later.

“he's adorable isn't he?” Italy texted back, and then, “you both are”