#b/c this image delights me

[unproduciblesmackdown]

don’t forget the reason for the season (would you kiss your clone? yes. and you’re mr. maccabee)

[simping-acefully]

Ep 3 got me acting really unwise

Nsfw headcanons for Laios under the cut (gn unspecified partner for Laios)

Warnings: NSFWish, probably ooc, reader insert implied?, probably not very sexy because I used this for character analysis.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Laios is very attentive, though he's also very insecure when it comes to engaging with others. So I imagine he'd be a little clumsy, though very eager to provide the best aftercare for his partner. He's also very cuddly.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

The favorite part of his own body are his hands. They are strong and calloused, and he's used them to protect others and to create new stuff! (Aka, cooking) the fact that those hands can also help him please a partner is a plus.

On a partner? Probably lips. I imagine Laios struggles to read people's facial expressions (the 'tism go brr) but seeing his partner's smile is reassuring. He also really likes running his thumb over them and maybe getting his fingers nibbled.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He cums a lot.He has tasted his own cum out of curiosity in the past, too. And if he had a partner that ejaculated or squirted he would be delighted to taste it all.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He has probably jerked off to thoughts of his partner before they get together and it's eating him alive :(

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Zero experience, lots of book knowledge though! He's confused but he's got the spirit. Will need some leading at first, but he's a quick learner and is curious enough to experiment and try new things once he's gained confidence.

As an ace myself, I like to think that Laios is either ace too, or has a low drive and thus, sexual intimacy is a matter of doing something intimate and unique with a partner.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Any position that will allow him to see his partner's face for smooching! The emotional intimacy is the most important part for him.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He tries to be serious to the point he's almost uptight. But his clumsy and eager nature ends up organically devolving into somewhat goofy intimacy.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

The carpet matches the drapes, but this man keeps it all natural because ?? Why would he waste time/energy on such things??? (Aka, he's not used to grooming the area, but he would do an effort if asked)

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Very!! The main driving force for the act. Laios is constantly kissing and checking with his partner. He loves them so much and this is a physical way to convey those feelings!

He holds hands with his partner, kisses their face and neck and tries to keep them as close as possible, the mental image of melting into a puddle together comes to mind.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Doesn't do it often, but when he does it's more of a thing of connecting with his own body than getting rid of any urges. He won't be able to get off unless he's in a good mood.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Has a wee bit of a praise kink that he doesn't fully understand.

Shibari is one he wants to delve into, too. There's something to be said about the artistry of the knots, and the feeling of compression can be quite comforting.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Probably his partner's bed. He shares a room with Falin, so intimacy on his place is a no-no. He doesn't particularly enjoy motels or inns either because he feels kind of self conscious/pressured to perform within a time limit. He was to take things slow and he wants to cuddle to sleep afterwards, dammit!

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

I think his biggest driving force is an emotional connection. He craves to be understood and loved, so feeling that coming from his partner will make him want to show his appreciation in a physical way.

Probably jealousy is another good way to make Laios seek out his partner. He wants reassurance, to kill any doubts in his mind and any lingering feelings of inadequacy.

Also adrenaline too! Sometimes when the blood is pumping, his mind wanders. If he and his partner just were in a situation of danger, the physical reminder that they are there, alive and safe will make him desperate to feel them.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Doesn't like/understand degradation, and wouldn't do anything that he felt could hurt his partner.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He prefers to give, and lives for pleasing his partner! He's not very skilled at first, but he's very observant and receptive, so he gets the hang of what his partner likes even if they do not say so themselves.

However, after getting head himself, he's hooked. He loves it, he loves the look on his partner's eyes and the physical feeling is overwhelming on the best possible way.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Usually slow and sensual, unless he just had a life or death situation with his partner, then he's desperate and anxious.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Not one to really go for quickies, but if he's on the rare mood for one, he'll be sure to get and give lots of affection.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Laios would be interested in trying everything at least once. He's curious and inquisitive, and just as he is fascinated by monsters, he's fascinated by his partner and wants to learn what turns them on, and see what also works for him

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Stamina for days! He can last one very long round. If he didn't get sleepy and cuddly afterwards, he could probably do more, but hnnnggg comfy

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He doesn't own toys, but if introduced to them he's up for trying pretty much anything, both on himself and his partner.

I can see him growing particularly attached to non-human looking dildos/strap-ons and ropes.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He's not much of a tease, but he low-key enjoys being teased. He doesn't seem to understand it, or be fully aware of the fact, but yeah.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Not particularly loud out the impulse to self restrain, but Laios is a whiner. He can get pretty loud when he's about to cum though.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Would love to roleplay as a monster with their partner but when he did bring up the idea he got laughed off and passed it off as a joke. It was not a joke.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

I like to think that it would kind of mimic his silhouette, length slightly above average and overall on the thicker side. The widest point is right after the head.

Not very high at all. I kinda imagine Laios on the gray sexual spectrum so, it only becomes a thought after he begins pining for his eventual partner. It starts with him wondering how soft their hands would be, how about their neck and lips? And it eventually escalates to wandering thoughts of intimacy.

Once he does become intimate with a partner, he longs for intimacy more than he longs for sex itself.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

VERY. He's an eepy man.

[authorhjk1]

Interlude: Venice

(IU X Male Reader )

Lee Jieun puts a strand of hair behind her ear, before smiling at the camera. The photoshoot is turning out really well. She got more than enough gorgeous pictures taken and only half of the day has gone by so far.

She is already excited about the second half of the day. You had to promise her that you would spend your time with her throughout the next three days. More than enough time so satisfy every single one of her needs.

"Alright."

IU smiles as the photographer stops taking pictures.

"We are finished with the first part. The second one will start in ten minutes. Miss Lee, we are going for a couple shoot this time."

The Korean woman politely bows her head, before heading towards her dressing room.

As she opens the door, she stops in her tracks.

"W-What are you doing here?"

You look up from your phone, seeing a stunned IU.

"I'm your partner for your shoot."

"But-"

You get off the sofa.

"You don't think I'm handsome enough?"

"Y-You are, but-"

Jieun seems afraid that someone could find out. The relationship between the two of you needs to be a secret.

"I just didn't expect you to be here."

"Why not? I promised to fuck you, didn't I?"

Jieun glances behind her making sure the door really is closed.

"But not here!"

She whispers a shout, visibly scared that someone could find out.

"Relax. We have 10 more minutes, don't we?"

You sneak your hands around IU's waist.

That black dress highlights her slim figure. Her blonde hair makes her look even better than her natural colour.

"What do you want me to do? And where do you want it?"

You feel the older woman shiver slightly with excitement. The thrill of possibly getting caught arouses her even more now.

"Your mouth."

She kisses your cheekbone.

"C-Can you please eat me out?"

You see her blush. Now that she is actually asking you for something, she becomes a little shy.

"You want me to bury my face in your pussy?"

IU's mouth escapes a needy whine as you plant an image in her head.

You take that as a yes. Your hands on her waist turn her around, before bending her over the make up table on your right. The mirror on the wall is decorated by a couple of lights.

Kneeling behind her, you admire how fine IU's body looks in that tight dress. Especially her butt, since it's right in front of you now.

You start to slowly rise the hem of her one-piece. More and more smooth skin gets revealed, the further you hike it up. Finally bunching it up around her waist, you expose IU's matching panties.

The black fabric is the only thing that now seperates you from your delicious meal.

Aware that you have limited time, you quickly pull down her underwear. Enjoying the feeling of her skin, you give each of the blonde's butt cheeks a kiss.

Jieun let's out a delighted moan. She is excited for the next three days. And it seems like they are starting out really well.

As promised, you bury your face deep in IU's pussy. You take in her scent and the slight sweetness of her juices as you hear her moan. Parting her lower lips with your tongue, you enter her hot cavern.

"Mmmm."

IU let's out another satisfied moan.

You feel her hand reaching for your head, trying to push you further into her, while she backs up a little. Your own rest on her hips as you eat her out.

Jieun's wide eyes stare into the mirror as she feels your tongue, burying itself deep inside her pussy. She can't believe how horny she is, when she sees you. She just needs some sort of pleasurable outlet, whenever you are close to her. Maybe that's because of that night in Paris.

She still doesn't know who the other woman was. It makes her feel really weird. Especially when she meets other idols during award shows, music shows, or other events. A shiver runs down her spine. The person, who buried their strap on inside the most intimate part of her body, might be someone she interacts with on a daily basis.

For a moment she thought that her best friend, Yoo Inna, could've been that person. But she quickly got rid of that suspicion. The woman's voice sounded different.

IU moans into the mirror as you feast on her delicious pussy.

The fact that it could be someone she knows, someone younger than her, someone who knows what a slut she is, turns her on even more.

You use that to your advantage, knowing that you don't have much time.

Jieun's legs quiver harder with every passing second. Your fingers dig into her flesh, pulling her plump cheeks apart to give you better access to her hot core.

"Oh fuck!"

With a loud and deep moan, Jieun let's her head sink onto the table. Juices start to run down her thighs in small streams as she orgasms inside her dressing room.

"Took you long enough."

You tease her as you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand.

"Please put an arm around her."

You do what the photographer tells you to do. Your hand finds its place on IU's waist. The soft black fabric reminds both of you, what you just did mere minutes ago.

"Turn to the side and place a hand on his chest."

Jieun follows the man's orders, placing her hand on your white shirt, right about your heart. You didn't move yours, which means your hand is now resting on her back. Only inches away from her ass.

Being the professional she is, Jieun grabs your tie, while looking up at you.

"Very nice!"

The photographer keeps taking pictures.

"You like this one?"

You whisper out of the corner of your mouth.

"You like being blindfolded, do you?"

While looking at the camera, you can't see IU's reaction. But you can hear how her breath hitches. She knows fully well what you are talking about.

"Who was it?"

A question she asked before. A question you are not going to answer.

The photographer stops Jieun from asking again, making the two of you do a more mature concept.

IU stands now directly in front of you, leaning her head to the side. You reach around her waist, holding her tight. For the photo, you are only supposed to pretend to kiss her. But when you burry your face into her neck, you can't help yourself.

Jieun's mouth opens a little in surprise and enjoyment. Everyone thinks she is just doing this for the photo. But you know better. Your lips move across her smooth skin.

Only the sound of IU's moans echo through the room. The tie you wore earlier is covering her eyes. It takes her back to the night in Paris, turning her on even more.

"Oh fuck!"

Jieun moans loudly as you take her from behind.

The sun is slowly starting to rise over the roofs of the beautiful houses around your hotel. Which means you were fucking her the whole night. Only taking a break to recover your stamina and eat.

But now, 12 hours after the photoshoot, Jieun is bend over the edge of the bed. Her knees are placed on the carpet in front of it, while you kneel behind her.

She looks smaller than usual in this position. You hold her by her wrists with one hand, while the other presses her shoulder into the mattress.

The blue dress she wore at the end of the shoot is probably still lying in the shower. Wet from the shower the two of you took around midnight. It's probably lying there since you came into your room though. You remember throwing it somewhere, after ripping it off her small body.

Jieun kept her boots on at first, partially because you threw her onto the bed, before she was able to take them off. They are now lying near the windowsill. You took them off her feet as you fucked her back against the glass. There wasn't much space there.

Her underwear must be lying around somewhere too.

"Oh my good! You are bruising my pussy!"

You probably do. You haven't gone longer than ten minutes without you fucking Jieun in the last 12 hours.

That thought reminds you of where the rest of her clothes are. Her bra is dangling from the chandelier in the middle of the room. Don't even ask how it got up there, you don't even remember. It's blue, matching her dress and her panties. Her panties...

"I'm! Fucking! Cuming! So! Hard!"

As IU orgasms violently, her pussy squeezing your cock, you do your best to hold on. You are almost at the edge yourself.

"Oh my god! I'm such a mess."

You hear her mumble into the mattress, probably to herself.

Now you remember where her panties are. Or rather with whom.

During dinner time, most of the guests in the hotel visit the restaurant next to the lobby. At that time, the hotel stuff goes through the rooms and cleans, preparing them for the night.

They usually only come in, when no one answers to their knocking and if they don't hear noises behind the door.

That's why the two of you got caught by a very surprised hotel maid.

IU's panties in her mouth, muffling her screams, while you fucked her into the leather couch. The two of you were too lost in the act itself to hear the door.

It didn't take much work to convince the beautiful Italian woman to join. The brunette was more than willing to share with IU, when you eventually came on both of their faces.

She stayed for an hour or so, leaving with a souvenir. You don't know her name, but maybe she will be back today. It's not like the two of you are going anywhere.

"Damn you whore. How are you still so fucking tight?"

Jieun weakly laughs into the sheets as you keep fucking her from behind.

"A-Are you close?"

The longer you fuck her, the longer it takes for you to cum. Your body just doesn't seem to be able to keep up with you.

"Soon."

You groan, thinking about a position, where you can drive yourself faster to another orgasm.

"Do you want my ass? It's tighter, you know."

Jieun gladly tries to help you to decide. She knows how hard it is for you to cum consistently every hour almost.

"Where is the lube?"

You search the room, IU is unable to do so.

You try to remember the last time you used it. Your thrusts slow down as you try to think about it.

A couple of moments later, you start to fuck Jieun's ass, right where you found the small bottle of lube.

"You're stretching me out really good."

She moans against the white tiles of the shower as you plow her from behind.

The water is turned off this time. IU's hair is wet. Not because of the shower a couple of hours ago, but a lot of sweat and some of your cum. It sticks to her neck and shoulders.

"Why can't we spend every night like this one?"

She weakly moans, trying to sneakily convince you to do just that.

"Not a chance, Jieun."

"Please?"

Her cute whine makes you press her cheek against the cold tile, her ass slightly tightening around you as a result.

"I still have a girlfriend to satisfy. And work."

Another pitiful mewl escapes her mouth.

Your thrusts become harder and faster, knowing how much the older woman needs you. The last couple of hours proved, how much Jieun has started to become addicted to the feeling of your cock inside of her.

"I never want this trip to end."

She sighs in disappointment as you keep fucking her ass.

"I'm getting close."

You see her smile, her eyes still covered by your tie.

"Please cum in me. The last time you left a load there feels like ages ago."

"Beg for it, slut."

Her begging is necessary for you to reach the edge at this point.

"Please, cum in my ass."

You slightly pick up the pace. There is not much juice left in your body. In more than one sense.

"Use my hole like a cum dump."

"That's the only thing it's good for."

"You're right, daddy. Use my body properly."

With both hands holding onto her ass cheeks, you thrust deeper into IU.

"You ruined me for anyone else, daddy."

Red marks, produced by your grip, mark her cheeks. They ripple, whenever you thrust into her from behind.

"This body is yours now. Only you can make me cum."

"That's a good girl."

You kiss her neck as you feel yourself closing in on that edge of the cliff. You enjoy how much control you have over her. A woman who is older than you. A woman who is a globally known singer and actress. Offering her body to you and begging you to cum in her.

"Yes, daddy. I'm a good girl. Please."

Your last couple of thrusts are slow but hard. You hit Jieun's cervix with every snap of your hips, making her jolt forward. The tight ring of her muscles squeezes you hard, begging you to fill her body with your cum.

"Damn, Jieun."

You groan her name as you finally cum.

It's honestly not much. It's a small load compared to the one you gave her right after the photoshoot. But your body is drained of all it's fluits. You don't have much more to offer. IU's body has soaked up every last drop of your cum. You wonder how much you came inside of her. Probably a week's worth of cum.

You have to hold onto the glass wall as you watch Jieun slowly glide down along the tiles. When she reaches the floor, she looks up at you with big eyes. Her blonde hair partially covers her face.

"I think I need a longer brake this time."

You can see how much she is trying to hide her disappointment. Although, she is visibly tired as well.

The lock on your hotel room door beeps, letting you know that someone is coming in, using the second key card.

"Mr. (Y/n)?"

High heels click on the marble floor in the small hallway at the entrance.

Her Italian accent seems to always try to seduce you.

You know that voice. You heard it last night, when she sucked you off, asking you to fuck her on the balcony.

"Looks like your new best friend is hear."

You're kinda glad. The two of them can take care of each other for a while and you can recharge.

Once the young maid stands in the door, your tired body starts to react. The break is gonna be as short as possible.

-----------

Hope you guys enjoy this.

I'm going to sort some of my smaller stories and make posts, where you can find all the chapters, so don't be surprised if I post something with a title you've already seen.

Stay healthy!

[gilverrwrites]

Hi friend!

Would you be interested in doing a NSFW alphabet for Bruce? Just read your black mask one and damn heheh

Bruce Wayne: NSFW Alphabet

AN: Thank your so much, glad you enjoyed! And yes I would be interested.

As always readers; please take whatever you vibe with and leave what you don’t. It’s all in good fun.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

It really depends on your existing relationship, and its level of intimacy.

A hook-up is getting the bare minimum to keep his image where he wants it to be. He’ll help you get clean, offer you his bathroom, and if he can, he’ll help you redress and get you out asap. If you decide to stay, he’ll be cordial; he’ll do the pillow talk, let you wear his shirt, make sure you’re fed and watered or whatever but he won’t hold you, and he won’t be there when you wake up. He will however leave a note with some half-truth about having to leave for business, and money/gift cards for a coffee and an Uber.

If you’re more than that (dating/married/so on) then it depends on how well you’ve voiced your needs to him, and how much time he has. Let’s be real Bruce is a hypocrite, he wants you to tell him in explicit detail how you need to be cared for, and if you don’t he’s profiling you until he gets it right, but he ain’t saying anything about himself.

So provided he doesn’t have to run off to save the day, or your escapades haven’t coincided with a routine patrol, Bruce is excellent at aftercare.

B = Body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Him: Bruce is highly critical of himself. He’s not blind, he knows he’s physically fit, widely intelligent, and highly attractive, but there’s also always room for improvement.

But if he had to choose, it would be his brain. He enjoys being able to look at you and knowing in an instant that you want him. Knowing if it’s a right here right now, or a tease me till I’m begging kind of want. Knowing exactly what you need to hear or where you need to be touched. Being able to predict and acclimatise to your desires is such a big thing for him.

As for you: It’s all in your eyes. You may or may not think you’re quite stony-faced, but not to Bruce. He just loves how expressive your eyes are. Yes, when he’s analysing you; looking for those dilated pupils and heavy lids. But also just the delight when he surprises you with sneaky kisses, when the skin around them grows crinkly as he growls something totally scandalous, or how they grow wide and doe-like as he’s stretching you out, or when they twitch and roll when he’s fucking you just right.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He’s not particularly vocal about it unless he’s really lost in the heat of the moment but; breeding kink. He wants his cum buried as deep inside of you as your body will allow. He wants you so full it’s spilling out and leaking down your thighs, soaking into the bedsheets. And then he’s gonna scoop all those stray drops up and push it all right back in.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

At his age, he doesn’t really get the terms that people use in sex nowadays. That information wasn’t easily obtained in his prime but if he had to identify with something he’d claim soft/dom and/or a brat-tamer, and he’d be right.

But sometimes he likes to switch roles.

He’d never admit it, because he’s a goddamn control freak, he considers (his own) submission as weak and at best he’d be a power bottom but damn it’s so comforting and so hot to be at your mercy or just taken care of sometimes.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Ooh ho ho. Brucie has been around many blocks, and back again.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

I have no explanation for this, I just feel it in my bones but he’s so into doggy. Especially when it’s a hook-up and/or a quickie. By extension, the flatiron because it offers that really deep penetration that has him cumming right against your cervix.

Also the eagle and the leg lock/missionary, specifically with a pillow under your hips and one of his hands pushing on your stomach so that he can keep you in place as he punishes your g spot.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Very rarely goofy, at least not until he’s at a level of familiarity and intimacy that would allow him to let those walls down. He’s not without a sense of humour, it helps if you’re goofy first.

Blow a raspberry on him, and he’s pinning you down and giving you 10 back. Give him a ridiculous nickname and he’ll start testing new ones out on you. “Ohh Brucie boo boo, that feels so good.” “You like it when I bend you over and fuck you like this honey bunny?”

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

It’s thick and dark, but well-trimmed. In his younger years, he waxes off his happy trail and chest hair, but from his mid-late 30s, he starts letting it grow.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

This again is widely dependent on your relationship.

If you’re a hook-up it’s just about fun really. It’s sensual, borderline pornographic but ultimately impersonal.

But if you’re more than that, then sex is very intimate for him, and he’s surprisingly passionate.

He struggles with voicing his emotions so this is how he shows you his appreciation for all that you do. It’s how he apologises for being gone so much, for making you worry. Your body is where he takes out his frustrations but also where finds respite and comfort.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Not something he particularly enjoys, but it is a necessity. He’d rather the real thing, but if that’s not accessible when he needs to let off some steam then so be it.

There have been many, long frustrating nights that have ended with him beating it in front of the batcomputer, unable to focus, and wishing it were you.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

As previously mentioned, breeding kink. (See c for cum)

Bondage: I’m specifically talking about him being the rope bunny here. Nothing extreme, soft ropes holding his wrists to a chair or a bed frame while you grind on him. Yes he could break out at any minute, but he doesn’t, that’s part of the submission, the fun.

This can be flipped, he’ll tie you up if that’s what you want but he prefers to pin you down with nothing but his own strength and body weight.

Roleplay/primal play: His interest in the whole cat and mouse (or bat and cat) has never been subtle really. He likes being the predator, catching the prey and taking his reward. Ties in closely with the brat taming too if you’re a fighter or mouther.

Extending on prev, I think he’d also like interrogation play: again both ways but primarily he likes to be the interrogator. To hold you down, tease, and question about whatever subject matter, probably what you want to have done with you, until you beg him to make good on all your confessions.

L = Location (favourite places to do the do)

He’s boring in this regard; the bed. It’s a comfortable, safe environment where he can let loose.

If you wanted to do it in the cave or the Batmobile he’d comply, but explicitly when off duty with low risk.

But if it was up to him, he’d keep you all locked up in his chambers, squirming in his sheets, eyes rolling back to look at his ceiling. It’s like he’s claiming you, inside and out, full and scented by him and his bedsheets.

Maybe, with the certainty that nobody will be home, he’ll find other places to fuck you; the marble stairs, the hot tub, in front of the fireplace.

But be prepared for the unmitigated guilt and humiliation of traumatising at least one of his kids when they inevitably stop by unannounced.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

He often comes home in the early hours of the morning still full of adrenaline and looking for relief.

Outside of that, he’s highly receptive to teasing and shameless levels of flirting. Clothing too; he likes skimpy, short skirts low cut tops but that’s not always necessary. Just knowing you’ve got nothing on under that flowy outfit, or that he bought you those shoes, or that’s his button-up will do it for him.

And then there’s domesticity. When you bring him food during a long and intense research session. Seeing you be really good with Damian, or helping Cass with her ballet hair, or scheduling dinner for the two of you with Babs and Dick.

Just you clicking so perfectly into his life, predicting and meeting his needs without being asked, makes him want to show you just how much he appreciates it.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

If you want to call him daddy that’s fine, he can be your baby daddy, but you are not his baby.

You can be his baby momma though. He wants to fuck a child into you, not fuck a child, even in a fantasy capacity.

If he wanted a child he’d be adopting you, not sleeping with you.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

50/50

He rarely gives oral when hooking up, because he’s a fucking beast at it. Wet and sloppy, just going to town, which affords him a lot of women wanting to ride again. But in that same vein, he doesn’t expect these people to give him anything. If they’re gasping for it, he’ll oblige but otherwise, he just avoids the whole oral thing.

But when it’s his love, there’s no stopping him from spending an afternoon worshipping those perfect hot, wet folds. Drinking you up until your fluids are dripping down his neck, until his scalp aches from your grip and you’re seeing stars.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

It varies of course but preferentially 70/30 rough/sensual with a lot of crossover.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

As mentioned in J for Jack-off, if he needs to release some tension quickly, and you’re available then he’ll take you. Bend you over the nearest surface, bruising you with his vice grip, no sound but for his grunting and the salacious slap of your skin against his until he’s got everything out of his system and can get back to the job at hand.

But otherwise, he’d rather take his time with you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

If you’re an adrenaline junkie, then sure he’ll take risks for you.

That said, the risks he takes are calculated, and he is good at maths. He won’t bore you with the statistics, just know that he’ll always find a way to give you what you want.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

No average human can keep up with Bruce Wayne’s stamina, let’s be real. But that’s okay, when you’re all spend and cock drunk and too weak to move, he’ll make sure you don’t miss out on anything. He’s strong and fit enough to do all the work for the both of you.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Holy utility belts Batman!

For all his gadgets and tech, I want to say he has sex toys galore but honestly I really don’t think he does.

He probably has the classics: retrains, cock ring, remote control vibe, plug, dildo and/or strap.

And some more out there things: electro collars/low impact tasers, clamps, a swing.

Heaven knows he can afford anything and everything. But beyond that, I don’t think he reaches for them often, nor does he seek out or experiment with new ones. Not unless something sparks it.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Are you kidding? The moment he sees his opportunity he’s laying the teasing on thick. Sneaking touches when nobody is looking, speaking to you in that voice, calling you while you’re busy to tell in explicit detail what he’s been thinking about doing to you since he saw you in those pants this morning.

And when he finally gets you alone, he’s 100x worse.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make)

Noisy but not loud. He has such a low, deep voice. So when he groans and coos in your ear it’s certainly clamorous to you. All the filthy things he says bellows.

But nobody outside the room you’re in will hear him, not unless he wants to be heard anyway.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

With time and experimentation, Bruce knows what turns you on better than you do. Kinks you’ve never thought of. Subtle touches you barely notice, getting just close enough for you to smell his natural musk. He moves his body in precise ways, and uses really specific words that have your mind racing.

He’ll play you like a fiddle and have you thinking it was your idea.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He’s packing, and we all know I don’t mean guns.

And that's when it’s soft and in the cold. At full glory, I’d say at least 8 inches, above average girth. Cut, with some very prominent veins.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Fair to moderate, adrenaline heightens the senses and emotions and can be an aphrodisiac which is where a lot of his drive comes from.

But removing that from the equation, he’s trained himself not to think about you or anything that turns him on when he needs to focus. So when he gets to relax or when he sees you again, all that pent-up denial comes running back to him.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

It really depends on his mindset. More often than not, by the time post-climax hits, after an already long night, he’s out like a light the moment you’ve signalled that you don’t need him any more. Sometimes sooner.

But if something’s on his mind, a series of clues that aren’t adding up, a villain that shouldn’t have gotten away, when he’ll be up all night thinking about it. In this scenario, it’s not uncommon to find his side of the bed empty within an hour or two.

[eli0004]

Armin Arlert NSFW Alphabet

Pairing: sub!Armin x Reader

Warnings: heavy kink, mentions of body image insecurity and jealousy, subspace, msub, kink, cum play and pure filth bc Armin is a kinky fuck, mentions of porn.

[A/N: Another one down! It took a while but I’m pretty pleased. Feedback is always appreciated!]

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Slumped. He’s boneless and pliable, he drags himself to lay on top of you in search of your praise and affection. He’ll keen and shyly bury his face in your chest when you tell him how good he did and how pretty he looked doing it.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Armin likes your legs. He’s a leg man, but he likes every part of you truthfully. He likes to lay on your thighs while you pet his hair, and he’ll slowly start to kiss over your skin. He likes your hands, and often imagines them around his throat or your fingers inside of him while he’s watching you do everyday tasks.

Armin likes almost nothing about himself. He has some body image issues, which calls for some praise and worship if you ask me. Someone’s got to show this boy he’s beautiful.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Armin is a little freaky, it goes without saying. He’s a bit of a cum slut. He likes when you make him shoot his load all over his tummy, he likes when you dip your fingers into it and pop them in his mouth.

He cums in large amounts, it all but pours out of him like a faucet. It’s not thick or super gooey, mostly thin and watery. It gets everywhere if he isn’t careful in aiming.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Armin is a pillow humper, he gets excited and can’t help but stuff his pillow between his legs to grind into it softly. I mentioned this in another post, but all that soft stimulation makes him extremely sensitive to deliberate touching, and he will cum in seconds, shaking and crying the first few times you get your hands on him.

Just wait until he starts sending you videos of himself hugging a plushy or pillow between his thighs, hunched over and trembling as he rubs the head of his cock against the fabric, soaking it in his release. 🤤

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

None at all. Absolute virgin. Armin hasn’t even so much as had a first kiss when he meets you, not because he’s undesirable, but because he’s awkward. He doesn’t know how to talk to people he finds attractive, if you’re in a relationship with him it’s likely because you’d known each other a long while.

But it doesn’t take long after the first kiss for him to start fantasizing about touching, being touched, and though he likely won’t initiate, he’s delighted when your make out sesh finally leads to grinding and slipping hands under clothes.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Armin likes classic missionary when he’s feeling romantic, prone bone and doggy (both giving and taking)

He loves the Amazon position, and I think this one was the pipeline to his obsession with pegging.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

The first few times are giggly and awkward, but the more comfortable he is with you, the more he loses himself in the pleasure. His eyes glaze over and he gets weepy and whiny, but he does smile a lot when he’s feeling extra good

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

It honestly depends. Most of the time he keeps it trimmed, and every now and again he will shave it bare, but a day or two later he’s complaining about the prickly feeling and going on about how he’ll never do it again. It never gets out of control though, he would easily become self conscious of it if he let it get too long.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

He likes it rough, but that’s not to say he isn’t intimate. He’s a hand holder, he likes to cling onto you and press himself into your skin as close as he can get. He smacks his lips against yours in messy, sloppy kisses while he moans into your mouth. Praise makes him throb just as easily as degradation, he’s such a good boy, and he looks at you like you’re his lifeline.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

If you’re not with him and he’s suddenly horny, he’s stuffing his hand down his sweats in an instant. Several times a day if he’s feeling extra needy, and he likes to take his time with it, slow strokes with one hand while the other massages his balls.

He has an oral fixation, so he’ll suck on his fingers and imagine they’re yours, and sometimes he’ll kick his legs up when he’s feeling kinky and bring his fingers down to dip past his rim for some extra stimulation.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Pegging- and really anything anal related. When Armin discovered prostate orgasms his life was changed. He says they feel stronger, like a full body experience. He has such a cute ass too, it’s a treat to be behind him while he’s taking it face down in the bed.

Degradation and humiliation- he wants to feel like he’s less than you, just your toy to play with, and to destroy when you’re angry.

Bondage- Armin loves to be restrained and rendered helpless, blindfolded, gagged. It really sells the “I’m your toy” act.

Dirty filthy talk- the vulgarity that comes out of this sweet angel faced boy’s mouth will have your head spinning. “Use me, fuck me, come on, harder” and “I want you to _insert the most insanely filthy thing you can imagine_”.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Everywhere and anywhere within the walls of your home. The kitchen making dinner, the bathroom on his knees, giving you head like a good boy while you get ready, on the couch watching a movie, in the laundry room on top of the washer. Anywhere is free game, he’s always yours when you want him.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Everything? Your lips, your eyes, your hands, your voice. The fact that you look at him and want him like that in the first place. The way you look doing household chores, the firmness and unwavering confidence in your voice when you send back your burger because you asked for no pickles. Armin is enchanted by you.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

There’s not much he would say no to once he’s comfortable with you. If you bring a new idea to him he often meets it with genuine enthusiasm and curiosity, and knowing you’re thirsting for him enough to want to find new things to do to and with him gets him excited as it is.

If I had to choose something, I’d say aside from public sex, things like sounding make him a little nervous but it’s not a hard no. Age play is a hard no and the idea of cuckholding makes him violently jealous.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

This man eats pussy like it’s his last meal on death row. He takes munch to a whole other level, breakfast lunch and dinner, Armin is always ready to bury his face between your thighs. He’d happily suffocate himself between your folds, and die very, very contented. Almost all of his fantasies revolve around your thighs caging around his head, gazing up at you through long lashes while you praise him softly.

He’s good at sucking dick too if you’re amab, for a man with very little to no experience, he’ll have you questioning everything you thought you knew about him. No gag reflex, he probably taught himself how to turn it off just for giving head. He’ll happily let you fuck his face of course, he’s quite the masochist.

Armin doesn’t care much if you want to go down on him. He’ll let you touch him however you wish, but he’d much rather be the one putting his mouth to work. He gets so drunk off your sounds and your fingers carding through his soft hair, he’ll start grinding up against the nearest surface just for a bit of friction.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Baby likes it rough, especially if he’s the one taking it. If he can form coherent sentences, you’re not fucking him hard enough. He wants to be reduced to a crying, drooling mess, especially when he’s been stressed out recently. There are definitely times when he prioritizes romance and sensuality, but Armin loves a mean dom, and it shows.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Absolutely yes, all the time. He’s so sensitive anyway, if you aren’t trying to drag it out he can and will cum in minutes. While he isn’t too fond of public sex, he definitely enjoys the thrill of a time limit. Bend him over or give him a quick suck while you’re cooking, a quick morning fuck before you leave for work. He says likes a challenge, but it’s not really a challenge to get him shaking underneath you in 5.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

It depends on the risk you’re wanting to take. He’s terrified to get caught in public, so there’s no way he’d willingly agree to that, but he’s pretty kinky, so within the walls of your bedroom there isn’t much he wouldn’t do to please you. Especially if it’s something Emasculating or embarrassing, humiliation gets him off embarrassingly fast. This means things like feminization, pet play (making him eat out of a bowl or sit in a dog crate), chastity, cum eating, guided masturbation, pain play, and even omarashi (to an extent) are all on the table.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

This boy has endless stamina it seems, he can go and go and go for hours on end. When he’s extra needy, his erections won’t really even start going down until the 2nd or third time he cums. He loves overstimulation, even though he’ll cry and whine and say it’s too much.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Probably…more than likely, he owns some of his own. Bullet vibes, pocket pussies, vibrating rings, etc. I’m sure he doesn’t use all of them himself, but probably collects them in hopes you’ll get curious and use them on him. Especially the rings; he knows he cums quickly, so he’ll try anything with the hopes to draw the experience out as long as possible.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He absolutely would never, unless he’s having a day where he wants it rough and messy. Mostly, Armin lives and breathes to be praised, he would mindlessly agree with whatever you asked of him just to hear the words “good boy”. He just falls into the roll of your sweet little submissive so easily.

To be teased, is a different story entirely. Edge him over and over, ghost your fingertips over his skin, go in for a kiss and watch his eyes flutter shut in anticipation, only to pull away and leave him confused. He loves to be reduced to desperate tears.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Shamelessly loud. I wrote in one of my headcannon posts that you could never discreetly have sex with Armin. He gets far too lost in the experience to really be aware of what noises he’s making or how loud he’s making them, but luckily you can quiet him down and satisfy his oral fixation by stuffing his mouth full of your fingers.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Armin has wet dreams a lot. He doesn’t dream every night, but when he does, 60% of his dreams are about sex. You can always tell because he’s so spacey the next morning, thinking about what happened in his dream. Sometimes he really wants to tell you about them in hopes to recreate them, but he gets too shy and backs out.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Armin isn’t big by any means, about 5 and 1/2 inches with a pretty, soft pink tip. He doesn’t curve, but when he’s fully hard, it points upward at a nice angle. Extremely sensitive, even a breath of air makes him twitch. It’s so cute too, the way it throbs and twitches against his belly when he’s laying there all horny and excited for you.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Armin isn’t just a closet pervert, he’s the closet pervert. Absolutely insatiable, he has sex on the brain morning and night and every minute in between. You cannot lie down horizontally together without him getting all hard and needy. I believe @ambassadorarlert wrote in one of their posts that his twitter saves are full of porn, and I second this, bby is into some wild things.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

The second he lays his head down and you start brushing through his hair with your fingers, praising him for how good he did and how well he listened, Armin is knocked tf out and probably won’t be up until noon tomorrow. He can’t help it, his balls are drained and he’s being doted on, what more could a man want?

[rose-tinted-kalopsia]

i promised ... and i owe ... so many of you thoughts on xavier's "no restraint" card..... SO HERE IT IS, UNDER THE CUT !! i ramble a lot so it's very long 🫶🫶

(this was so hard guys. this card was a whole entire shock factor.)

first of all...... please delight in this reaction image i can offer you. because. any of you who are reading this rn know exactly which part of the card i'm referring to when i say:

(in conclusion, my legs are open)

.. ANYWAY !!!!!!!!! CLEARS THROAT

things we're going to talk about? well, it's me, so (A) character development, (B) relationship development, but also (C) WHATEVER THE HELL WENT ON IN THAT KINDLED MOMENTS SSCENE <3

(A-1) Character Development; Xavier

over the past few cards we've been having of him, i think it's safe to say that we're familiar with a number of his mannerisms, and i've also talked about a lot why that is and what goes into that.

but a lot of it changes in this card. and it's so much more than just the moment of realization he has in 21 days, too. enough that—aside from what we know eventually takes place—we can safely assume that all this occurs after that card chronologically.

exhibit a; tendency to do things on his own.

this is something that i may not have talked about as much, but i'm pretty sure we all know it's there—that xavier has always carried this tendency to do things all on his own. there's multiple examples of this, and it goes way way way back to his anecdotes.

i.e. with "passing by" and "when shooting stars fall", we already have prime examples—

"Whether it's tasks assigned by the higher-ups or senior members, Xavier always completes them quickly and methodically. He works until they're done, but nothing more."

"Xavier stands alone amidst a circle of fallen bodyguards. In the corner, Lawrence is tied up with bed sheets, his neck at an odd angle."

"I notice the wounds on his hands and face. Catching his breath, he holds out his hand, showing me a small, glowing Protocore. This is the first time he's looked at me with desperation in his eyes. When he moves closer, I notice a ring of light around his neck. It's a striking, suffocating red."

in his lightseeker myth, too, he's also the one to take the initiative and look for an alternative to philos' sacrifice. he leaves mc behind, and he leaves jeremiah behind—it isn't until later that he's able to enlist the help of others and form the backtrackers, and even then, they all recognize that he's the most capable one among them. in fact, it's also evident in "from the stars" from world underneath:

"As the leader of the Backtrackers ... Asteroids, turbulence, and the collapse of wormholes couldn't tear Traceback ll's team apart. With Xavier there, they managed to break through the universe's most impregnable spacetime barrier."

"It seems like everyone had a reason to give up and leave halfway except you. Well, you did too, but you wouldn't because no one could replace you. We all thought that you'd still make it to the end, even if you were the only one left."

in the main story, we're also faced with multiple scenarios of xavier going off on his own to do hunter duties, or otherwise a little extra in order to find the protocore that he needs—"heartstring symphony" is also proof of that.

and lumiere's myth is no different, nor is the whole legend behind lumiere in the first place.

"Xavier is missing. He didn't show up on the set, and there was no sign of him at home either ... Since then, I've never received a Wanderer alert on my watch again. Just like Xavier predicted, the dark clouds gradually dispersed, and the heavy rain slowly became a gentle drizzle until it ceased completely. Breathtaking evening clouds replaced them. Dusk falls, accompanied by millions of glittering lights creating a spectacular meteor shower. Long streaks reminiscent of contrails are etched across the sky. Meanwhile, the newest updates are being broadcast repeatedly on the massive screen in the heart of Azure Square. The previously rampant Wanderers have disappeared overnight, leaving behind only some suspicious Protocores ... The doomsday panic, which overtook the city like an inflating balloon, shatters silently as if pierced by a pin."

"Right on cue, my watch loudly sounds the alarm, and I hear the roars of Wanderers from the flames. At that moment, Xavier vanishes, and a beam of light with as much force as a rainbow piercing through sunshine cuts through the collapsed, burning factory. In the blink of an eye, he leaps out of the raging fire, his sword still coated in Metaflux that has yet to dissipate."

"'Threat levels are at least A. I have to go—' 'Stay here. I'll be right back.' Xavier pushes down my shoulder, and a strange red light around his neck is quickly concealed by his collar."

"The red light on Xavier's neck flickers wildly. He swings his weapon, sending out a lightblade to kill the remaining, struggling Wanderer. Smoke created by the dissipated energy rises in all directions. He leans against the wall, trying to steady his wobbling form after the intense battle. 'Abnormal vital signs have been detected. Excessive use of Evol. Disengage from combat immediately and receive treatment...' Xavier turns off the annoying warning on his watch and lifts his gaze to the entrance of an alley, where several shadows are closing in on him."

moreover is the fact that from world underneath, we also know that his collar acts as a suppressor:

"'...Light Evol has been detected. Evolver's Evol limit cannot be defined.' 'Any attempts to probe its limit triggers a special neck suppressor, which prevents the Evolver from using their full power.'"

and yet despite that, he still continues to do what he does, anyway.

a lot of things play into it, and i talk a lot about how his upbringing as a prince must have largely contributed to habits like this. he's used to doing things on his own, and he's expected to, in a way—all the burdens and duties placed upon him the moment he was born, when he bever had any say in it. already in his "when shooting stars fall" anecdote, he's isolated from everyone and constantly surrounded by bodyguards, and mc acted as his only source of freedom by reaching for him past that barrier.

it's also worth noting that most (if not all) of this that he's been doing, is all and always for mc, too—as if it comes back full cycle. it's how he shows his love for her, because it's really the only way he knows how to.

which also brings attention to his always and ever highlighted communication issues—because common in all of these examples up until this card, is that he's been vague about it.

never giving the full answer.

never truly explaining what he's been up to.

and it's something that mc knows; he keeps his secrets well, and they've never really truly talked about these things.

but "no restraint" plays this out a little differently.

"Even though I still want to ask him about where he went, it's only a matter of time before more of Henrik's men arrive. Escaping is our main priority."

And yet;

"I realized I was being followed, which is why I didn't contact you. I managed to shake them off, but I was concerned they might catch up to me. That's why I searched for the Protocore by myself."

—"Why are you suddenly talking about this?"

"...No reason."

xavier willingly explains.

mc doesn't particularly ask—yet he says it anyway. to clear the air, to maybe make it known that he is putting in an effort.

in this situation, he hasn't derived from his habit of going off on his own, but he provides a good explanation of it. there's mediation; he's saying that he trusts her, and he wants to ensure that there is nothing for her to be worried about.

"I just wanted to say I'm not the kind of partner who would leave you behind... I'm also not one of those young people who take things for granted, either."

and he further willingly explains when she does probe him, replying with a reflection of the excuse she gave one of the bodyguards just to be able to get information out of him.

BUT, MOSTLY—

"i know you know" is xavier directly addressing the fact that their relationship has been curated around this trust that they've been starting to build with each other—he knows that mc was not exactly doubting him, yet he wanted to reassure her anyway, as if speaking it out loud makes it official.

sometimes you don't ask for reassurance because you know in your heart that your doubts aren't real. but receiving it never hurts—and that's how this plays out.

xavier has always known that communication has always been an issue with him.

he's willing to fix it, and willing to take that extra step to make sure mc doesn't feel unloved with him. he doesn't want to leave room for doubts.

"i know you know." i know you know i will never leave you, i know you know that i love you. i know you know, but i'll say it anyway. because i mean it. and you don't have to worry.

(LIKE DO YOU GUYS GET HOW IMPORTANT THIS LINE IS? 😭 HOW MUCH IT SAYS FOR THE EXTENT TO WHICH HE TRULY LOVES HER? 😭)

exhibit b; aloofness.

we also know that, while xavier can be pretty intense with regards to the previous point, he's always had this calm, easygoing, aloof nature to him. as if he could fade into the background, as if he's simply floating around like a little cloud—there's this aura around him that simply wants to just... be.

but, again, it's almost as if so much more hides underneath that. like it's not totally 100% inherently him. like it's not entirely natural, like the part of him that's like this is maybe somewhat a façade that he's been putting up for so long, so it's just ended up... becoming part of him, by force of habit.

there are so many subtleties to the way he seems to try to express himself—the little things. microexpressions. involuntary emotional leakage. they last for a fragment of a second, but they're there, and with xavier, they seem to always convey so much more than whatever words he can muster.... because he always finds himself short of doing it in the way he wants to.

again, it goes back to his communication issues.

he's used to being isolated. used to speaking eloquently as he does only when required, but never really quite knowing how to express affection. or, again, how to express himself in general.

"it's like he's just so used to being princely, that he can't let go of it even if he isn't a prince anymore. he wants to, but old habits die hard—he hides so much beneath that exterior still, and it's mc who's able to help him tear down those walls, mc who's able to make him want to try harder to."

and it's why we've always seen this push and pull with him. he has trouble being honest about his feelings, difficulties in telling mc he loves her, difficulties in being direct to the point with her. he'd dodge her questions, be vague about things... hints of directness, but never really pushing forward with it. he'd tease, but it falls short—mc doesn't know if he's being genuine or not. he doesn't know how to convey that. so a lot of their previous cards and previous moments have been very vague. so, so many examples, a very prime one being his lightseeker myth, because their communication issues very sincerely stuck out with that one. and the last intimate card they had—"tender nights"—and in fact, "heartstring symphony" too, very blatantly display how difficult it is for him to convey his feelings the right way.

but... again, "no restraint" plays that out a lot differently.

"If I had known, I would've kept you company until the mission ended."

"When you said no, they said— 'You're a special person. Won't you reconsider?' ... Did you reconsider?"

"'It's just a scratch. It'll heal in no time.' ... Xavier shakes his head, stands up, and leaves the room. When he returns, he's holding a box filled with bandages that have red foxes on them."

"He gets down on one knee and covers my knee with a bandage. The dim light blurs the outline of his hair ... After smoothing out the bandage, Xavier puts slippers on my feet. And then he stands up and leans against the edge of the table, shoulder to shoulder with me."

"He seems to casually glance in my direction. Noticing how I'm wearing a bathrobe, his gaze lingers on me for a second longer..."

"Does that mean you only like the bandage?"

"Before I realize it, his hand that's on the table slides over. He hooks his pinky over mine. 'I'm curious. The cupcake you mentioned—is it your favorite?'"

and...

he's more intentional with his words and his actions this time. he wants to show her that he loves her, he wants to show her that she means a lot to him. and they're still little things, not too major, but there's a certain confidence in the way that he does it. there's sureness. it's less of those awkward moments of "should i, shouldn't i?" and there's way less hesitation.

he's insistent on holding her and taking care of her wounds. he's insistent on having her say her side of things, because he wants to know what she really thinks, too. small staps towards clearer communication—and though the tension may still be high with them in this card in general, it's a kind of tension where you can feel that they're more comfortable.

it's a stark contrast.

this is the xavier that's more than just learning, more than just realizing—he's doing.

you can really see how he's grown as a person.

(A-2) Character Development; MC

BUT it's not JUST xavier who's grown. because like in all relationships, effort comes from both sides. and the main point here, is that mc has learned to trust him a little more, too.

this part is a little shorter, but i really wanted to bring attention to two scenes and how they both play out—and i'd also like to point out the very start of the card.

the card starts off very general and sets the scene quite well, but it also starts off with mc and xavier separated. this becomes largely the topic for discussion as the card goes on, because mc does wonder where he is, and why he isn't saying anything to her.

but it's not implied anywhere that she's particularly upset about it.

in previous cards/interactions, there's always a sense of exasperation behind her words—sometimes, like in "heartstring symphony", she's upset about it. she chastises him, she sometimes makes it known that she doesn't like when he does those things—

but this time there's none of that.

she allows the mission to move smoothly, doesn't react as much once she does hear xavier contact her again... and even if it shows that she keeps wondering where he is and what he's doing, and later on what he has been doing, it's founded on curiosity instead of frustration.

"Even though I still want to ask him about where he went, it's only a matter of time before more of Henrik's men arrive. Escaping is our main priority."

this is the mc that trusts him.

this is the mc that knows she doesn't particularly need reassurance from him, and she can do without it, because she knows what no matter what, she can trust what he's been up to.

and now;

if it wasn't obvious yet previously, this should make it.

because she's not upset—in fact, she's fond.

she recognizes that her own feelings stem from her own desire to have him with her at all times, too, but most of all, she recognizes that there's nothing to be concerned of, anyway.

she knows that in the end, the person that xavier loves is her. the person that xavier wants to protevt the most is her. the person that xavier wants to be with, as much as he can, as much as the circumstances let him—is her.

she's content with that.

she smiles at the bandage, because it's proof of it—he's just treated her wounds, so insistent on taking care of her even if she knows it's nothing but a scratch and that he doesn't even need to dote on her.

but he does.

he goes the extra stew to get a cute little bandage because he knows it'll make her smile more, too.

she knows that, and she's happy.

"You have your secrets too, but you're different from them."

in a stark contrast from the mc we've been used to before that seems a little on edge and unsure and so doubtful of so many things because there's a lot about xavier she doesn't know yet—this time, she accepts it. because they're both working towards communicating more, and being more affectionate... and there's just no reason and no need for be to be concerned.

it's a big step for her to take, and this is a surprisingly big amount of trust she's putting on him, but it's further proof of how much she—they—have grown.

"You're like.. a cupcake I tucked away so I can have you all to myself."

this is also a line that holds so much in it.

it's really struck out to me, and for a number of reasons, too— (1) it further emphasizes how content she is with him and how much she trusts him; (2) it further emphasizes her own growth with relation to how she shows affection; (3) it says a lot about the kind of special treatment she gives xavier, too.

starting with point #2—the mc we see with xavier has always been bold, always the one to initiate things.... but never truly reciprocates.

like the xavier before, mc never really follows through with what she starts. she'll tease, then pull back; initiate, and then abruptly leave him hanging. she's not much better than xavier in terms of showing affection, because although she may seem like the bolder one, the truth is that she's always been scared.

it goes back to the level of trust she has in him.

because she doesn't know too much about him, it prevents her from truly acting on her feelings—she doesn't know what to expect, doesn't know how far she's allowed to take things.

teasing remains teasing.

not this time.

we also see the level of sureness she has in her actions with the way she initiates their more intimate moments later on; she might have started out as coy, but not once did she back away from it... if not for the fact that she encourages it, even.

"I tug at his sleeve, unable to figure out whether I'm meaning to be flirty or not."

she says this, but she still continues. because she knows what she wants, and she trusts him with it.

then you bring that all together with point #3—the allusions to her own personality.

"You're like a cupcake I tucked away, so I can have you all to myself."

to me it feels less about her reciprocating his more possessive nature, and more about her views on how she's been cherishing him.

tucked away.

she uses past tense.

she could have very well said "a cupcake i tuck away"; which would imply that she frequently wants to hold him close to her to save for when they're alone.

but this is a cupcake she tucked away.

and to me it feels like she's held on to him so long... without actually appreciating him for who he is.

it's like having a pretty dessert with you, one that's too pretty to eat, so you keep for yourself for a while. and you... don't eat it. even if you're supposed to.

it's like getting a precious jewel, but you're too concerned about it being stolen from you, because it's just that precious and beautiful—so you keep it. you don't wear it, whether outside or wherever. you don't. wear it. even if you're supposed to.

and that's not appreciating them for what they are.

to me, it feels like that's how the change in tense makes mc's words appear.

a cupcake she tucked away—hasn't eaten at all. like how, with xavier, for all that she's been fond of him, she's never onve bridged the gap between them on her own, either. she's kept him at arm's length, doubted him, and everything else that comes along with all the communication issues they've always had.

this time, she recognizes it—and i'd like to think that in a way, she's also apologizing for it. she admits, out loud, to herself and to him, that she's been pretty selfish. she hasn't been treasuring him and cherishing him the way she needs to be. she hasn't been reciprocating when he's affectionate. she's been only shying away when he initiates something. she knows she's been like that, and she's saying—i'm not going to be like that anymore.

and again, it goes back to trust.

she trusts him.

and because she can trust him, she can love him how he is, for who he is.

"so i can have you all to myself" feels a lot more like, "so i can finally love you."

and then we get to this scene.

for one thing, she doesn't deny their relationship at all; for another—their conversation on "love" feels very striking to me, too.

"but he can be a little mischievous sometimes."

"isn't that just love?"

and then...

"you're not wrong."

it's like a very direct jab at xavier and his way of being affectionate; the teasing that he does, and the way he's sometimes a little vague, sometimes a little awkward—but he's trying, and he's becoming more sure of himself, too.

and xavier's way of showing affection is truly reserved for her, because there's really none of that awkwardness with anyone else—he doesn't try so hard.

mc seems to be, here, descriving that nature of him as "mischievous".

it is, in a way.

but she also knows that it's love.

that it's his way of showing love.

she recognizes it. she accepts it.

she's learned things about him, too, and she's thinking... all of it can be compiled into this little word called love.

there is love between both of them.

and we can say that at this point, they're pretty far into their relationship.

they've gotten quite comfortable with each other—they're being touchy, the playful banter is light and easy... and they're definitely working to strengthen the bond that they have. their communication has improved SO much... i'm so proud of them 😭

it's definitely not a fully developed relationship; they're still a little shy around each other, there's still a lot of tension that's hard for them to navigate. it seems they've also yet to cross the " i love you" barrier, or at the very least, that it's difficult to say—plus, mc is exceedingly embarrassed to find xavier had overheard her conversation with the receptionist.

yet... when we move on to when they start to get intimate, it's also very interesting to me that it goes so smoothly—and it's definitely not their first time.

but it's a first something.

and it doesn't make the moment any less full of emotion.

this particular sequence honestly had me so INCREDIBLY confused at first, because why on earth would he be trapped right;

but then you look into who xavier is and how he's been with mc, and it goes back to that—he has so, so much love for her that he simply doesn't know how to deal with it.

he's pleading her.

he's saying that if she continues drawing him in like this, what with how much he always feels for her, he's not going to be able to hold back.

it's a trap, in a way.

xavier is still trying his best to discern what it means to show love to someone—because all these years, he hasn't been able to learn that properly. and yet now that mc has fully grasped her end of the stick, now that she's confident and sure of what she wants and how much she feels for him, it's bringing forth a bubble of emotions that he can't seem to describe.

it might not be their first time, but i don't think that xavier ever moves on from what it feels like to be wanted by her like this.

it's scary, because he doesn't know how to navigate things like this.

"It's almost as if tiny flames are flickering in the depths of his gaze. They're faint yet ready to ignite my soul at any moment."

xavier, who's been raised with the notion that he has to know things, to be able to potentially lead his people as the future king of philos...

this is something he doesn't know.

and like how mc was always afraid of how uncertain she was with him, right now, he's afraid because he has so much emotion ready to burst forth that he doesn't know what to do with it.

there's an aura of disbelief that makes it so hard for him to grasp.

it's always been "i will love you in every universe"—for the both of them.

and now, he's having the full realization, maybe for the 928482857th time since they've become official, that she's saying those words back to him. that if he can love her in every universe, as every version of himself... then she can do the same for him.

she wants to do the same for him.

she is doing the same for him.

"she loves me."

"she wants me."

he's pleading with her to take what she wants, because she has all of him.

and then we go back to mc's confidence—because she realizes he wants this to proceed in exactly the same way she wants it to, and she's willing to become his undoing.

and even if he technically switches and takes charge in the next second, it comes to fruition that her giving him consent in this way is what breaks him free of that bubble.

"don't hold back", is all that this is, really.

and he doesn't.

and it's just, not really just about the tension they've built up to get to this moment—the coy excuse of using the protocore's supposed effects—there's so much that goes into it, with the way they feel, with how their desires are so blatantly displayed just like that, with how their love fuels how much they need each other.

it's almost funny, in a way, because it's as if both of them are saying "take me, i'm yours." at the same time. and then it becomes less about possession... and more of a complete and utter surrender to each other.

and i think that's beautiful.

(which also. BONUS? but if this doesn't signify how focused xavier is on giving pleasure and at the same time how easy it is for him to lose himself in the moment and feel good because you're feeling good—i don't know what else will ✋)

(also like. the aftercare... the morning cuddles.... the hickey mc left on him 😭 i love them so much..........)

IN CONCLUSION . . . . THIS CARD MADE ME FEEL MANY THINGS.

THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK 😭✋

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Rsync corrump linkdump

I'm coming to DEFCON! On Aug 9, I'm emceeing the EFF POKER TOURNAMENT (noon at the Horseshoe Poker Room), and appearing on the BRICKED AND ABANDONED panel (5PM, LVCC - L1 - HW1–11–01). On Aug 10, I'm giving a keynote called "DISENSHITTIFY OR DIE! How hackers can seize the means of computation and build a new, good internet that is hardened against our asshole bosses' insatiable horniness for enshittification" (noon, LVCC - L1 - HW1–11–01).

As per the uje, I've arrived upon a Saturday with a backlog of links that I have not managed to squeeze into the week's newsletters/blogs, so it's time for another linkdump, 22nd in an erratic series. Here's the previous 21:

https://pluralistic.net/tag/linkdump/

Let's start with some seasonal material, and by "seasonal," I of course mean Hallowe'en. Yes, August is the official start of Spooky Season, and yes, I am a monster for insisting on this, but being a monster is the point of Spooky Season (which is what differentiates Spooky Season pushers like me from the creeps who insist that you need to start prepping for Xmas in late September – they're monsters, too, but Yule Monsters are bad) (with the exception of Krampus).

I was a monster kid and now I'm a monster adult. It all started when I was bitten by a radioactive Haunted Mansion at the age of six:

https://memex.craphound.com/2012/10/22/how-a-haunted-mansion-addict-fell-in-love-with-the-greatest-ride-on-earth/

I am a sucker for all things monstrous, and so I was intrigued when I got a book of "creepy-cute" stickers in the mail from a publicist at Simon & Schuster:

https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/The-Creepy-Cute-Sticker-Book/Gaynor-Carradice/Creepy-Cute-Gift-Series/9781507222515

"Creepy-Cute" turns out to be an official designation, embraced by the illustrator GaynorCarradice, who has created several books on these lines, featuring her chibi/monster crossover creations, which do exactly what it says on the tin, by which I mean, there's some genuinely creepy stuff in the mix, along with the cute.

It's when the cute pastels rub up against the gore, skulls, eyeballs and other visceral viscera that these illustrations really kick off some heat – I've rounded up a few of my favorites here:

https://craphound.com/images/creepycute.jpg

One of the surefire signs that Spooky Season is upon us is that the (sometimes NSFW) Tumblr account Halloweenlandmotherfucker emerges from dormancy with a stream of images of vintage Hallowe'en cards (these were a thing!), photos of people in costume and other delightful visual novelties:

https://www.tumblr.com/halloweenlandmotherfucker

Monster culture isn't just for Hallowe'en, of course. The ancient and noble tradition of compiling and publishing bestiaries is alive and well, thanks to RPGs. In the beginning, there was the D&D Boxed Set, with its Monsters and Treasure booklet:

https://www.americanroads.us/DandD/ODnD_Monsters_and_Treasure.pdf

Then came the Monster Manual, the first hardcover D&D book, succeeded by the Fiend Folio, which featured Charlie Stross creations like the githzerai and slaad, Indeed, there was a whole, iconic library of hardcovers that fit perfectly in an oversized backpack that I dragged everywhere so that I could obsessively read and re-read them.

Eventually, these gave way to new hardcovers with new rules as well as new corporate owners (Wizards of the Coast, then Hasbro), culminating in the release of the Open Gaming License, an "open content" license that was a) grossly defective; b) largely irrelevant; and c) hugely controversial in 2023, when Hasbro terminated it:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/12/beg-forgiveness-ask-permission/#whats-a-copyright-exception

The Open Gaming License purported to license out game elements that weren't copyrightable (rules, tables, etc), as well as material that you could likely use under copyright exceptions like fair use:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2023/01/beware-gifts-dragons-how-dds-open-gaming-license-may-have-become-trap-creators

And worst of all, it was revocable, so games publishers who tooled up to publish supplements and sourcebooks based on the OGL could have the rug yanked out from under them at any time (that time turned out to be early 2023).

Hasbro's OGL rug-pull had three salutary effects:

I. It gave gamers a crash-course in what was – and wasn't – copyrightable in an RPG design;

It encouraged game developers to look beyond D&D's OGL rules and into truly open (and often superior) alternatives; and

It inflicted so much reputational harm on Hasbro that, 20 months later, they announced that they would release a new set of D&D rules under the Creative Commons Attribution Only 4.0 license:

https://www.dicebreaker.com/games/dungeons-and-dragons-5e/news/dungeons-and-dragons-2024-srd-wont-be-another-ogl-fiasco

Now, CC BY 4.0 is a real-ass license. Notably, it corrects a defect in the earlier versions of the CC licenses that gave rise to a class of predatory copyleft trolls like the odious Pixsy:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/01/24/a-bug-in-early-creative-commons-licenses-has-enabled-a-new-breed-of-superpredator/

If Hasbro follows through on their promise, the new CC materials will kick off with the 2025 release of the next edition of the Monster Manual:

https://dungeonsanddragonsfan.com/new-2024-dnd-monster-manual/

It's wild to think that tabletop RPGs are now a cutting-edge way to learn about digital policy, but on the other hand, D&D arrived in my home around the same time as my Apple ][+, which was also around the time I first heard the name Ronald Reagan (rest in piss).

The legacies of the 80s – RPGs, digital technology and Reaganomics – cast a long shadow. Last month, many of us discovered the hard way that Reaganomics – specifically, the embrace of monopolies as "efficient" – has produced a world of unimaginable brittleness. Millions of people around the world found themselves cut off from ATM cash, flights, hospital care, and many other essentials thanks to the Crowdstrike Blue Screen of Death outage. While many of the explainers have focused on how Crowdstrike fatfingered a software update that crashed all those computers, there's been a lot less commentary about how it is that one company had it in its power to do so much harm.

Writing last week for EFF's Deeplinks blog, my colleague Rory Mir tackled that (far more important) issue:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2024/07/crowdstrike-antitrust-and-digital-monoculture

Market concentration – monopoly – is the common thread wound around so many of our daily horribles. Think of the tech billionaires who threw in their lot with Trump last month. How did they get to be billionaires? Monopoly power. Remember back in 2017, that notorious photo of the tech industry meeting at the top of Trump Tower, with Peter Thiel at Trump's left hand?

https://techcrunch.com/2016/12/14/donald-trump-meets-with-tech-leaders/

People were appalled that this group of corporate leaders, who between them controlled virtually all the technology in our lives, would debase themselves by paying fealty to this buffoonish would-be dictator.

But far more consequential was the fact that you could fit everyone who controlled all of our technology around a single table. Once everyone important to an industry can fit around a single table, it's only a matter of time until they find a table to sit around, and that's when it all starts to go wrong. As the Communist firebrand Adam Smith once wrote, "People of the same trade seldom meet together, even for merriment and diversion, but the conversation ends in a conspiracy against the public, or in some contrivance to raise prices."

Enshittification starts with market concentration. This is a subject I'm going to be going very deep on next Saturday, when I give my Defcon keynote, "Disenshittify or die! How hackers can seize the means of computation and build a new, good internet that is hardened against our asshole bosses' insatiable horniness for enshittification":

https://info.defcon.org/event/?id=54861

When I give that talk – and afterwards at my book signing – I will be wearing an N95 mask, just as I did last year. Why am I wearing a mask? Two reasons: first, Long Covid is a horror. One of the best writers I know – a living legend – recently told me that their book-writing days are likely done because of Long Covid brain fog.

A new Lancet article gets deep into the science of Long Covid:

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S014067362401136X

The principle author of the Lancet article is Oxford health professor Trish Greenhalgh, who gave an excellent lay summary in her newsletter:

https://independentsage.substack.com/p/long-covid-a-dystopian-game-of-pinball

In particular, Greenhalgh describes why some people don't get Long Covid, and some people do – and, most important, explains why the fact that you didn't get Long Covid last time doesn't mean you won't get it next time:

https://independentsage.substack.com/p/long-covid-a-dystopian-game-of-pinball

So I don't want to get covid, and so I'm gonna wear a mask. Because masks fucking work. A new study reveals just how well they work:

https://www.thelancet.com/journals/ebiom/article/PIIS2352-3964(24)00192-0/fulltext

The study shows that wearing any mask, even without knowing how to fit it well, offers substantial protection against both contracting and transmitting covid. Even better: wearing an N95 (even without paying attention to correct fit) offers "near perfect" protection against covid:

https://today.umd.edu/n95-masks-nearly-perfect-at-blocking-covid-umd-study-shows

I didn't get covid at Defcon last year, and I didn't get it at HOPE, and I didn't get it on our family vacation in July – all events where friends got sick. The difference? I wore a mask. Which works.

OK, I need to go work on my Defcon speech some more, so I'm gonna sign off, but I will leave you with just one more link, the wonderful new public domain image search tool, Public Work, which crawls and indexes the Met, the NYPL, and other sources:

https://public.work/

I rely on public domain, CC and other freely usable clip art to make the collages that accompany this newsletter/blog's stories. While I have very little talent in the visual arts, I'm getting steadily better. I mean, look at this amazing image I womped up for last week's story on Bitcoin bros' election campaign finance fraud:

https://www.flickr.com/photos/doctorow/53893519593/in/album-72177720316719208

You can see a collection of my recent collages in my Flickr gallery for them:

https://www.flickr.com/photos/doctorow/albums/72177720316719208?sd

Support me this summer on the Clarion Write-A-Thon and help raise money for the Clarion Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers' Workshop!

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/08/03/smorgasbord/#creepy-cute

Image: Anne Lindblom (cropped) https://www.flickr.com/photos/kajsawarg/3600415175

CC BY 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

[wyrddogs]

Congrats! The stars have aligned and you’re ready to get a third dog. However, due to circumstances outside of your control, you can’t get a dachshund of any type or a terv. If you don’t get another dog now, you will never be able to get another dog. What breed do you choose?

Hmmm... Next Dog needs to be a small dog because I don't want two young large energetic dogs at the same time.

My preferred size is between 8 and 15 pounds (3.6 to 6.8 kg), and I'd want a rabbit dog, so the russell terrier fits that description. I'd want the short-legged version because short legs bring me joy.

I'd get the terrier tenacity, and of course they have been used as hunting dogs, and I'd be able to do Terrier Things like den trials and earthwork, and of course ratting. And of course it would be mainly a sport dog, so I could do agility, nosework, racing, etc. and have a good partner.

My main thing is I do like the more measured working style you can get in dachshunds (like Kermit's), and terriers can be so gung-ho that sometimes they will keep digging at a hole even when the prey has long since left. It could come back! Any second now!!

I'd probably have to get a bitch, or find a softer male, because terrier tenacity + intact male + confidence + Kermit and Zaku's personalities, could be a difficult thing to juggle.

But this would probably be my first choice to branch out to.

(All images from Google)

Next choice would probably be a working cocker spaniel (aka wocker). My friend has a young wocker and she is a DELIGHT. Adorable, spunky, energetic, loves to train, she's the whole package.

My two issues with wockers are a) health, because it ain't great, and b) size. They're bigger than I want. Oh, third issue-- c) spaniels in general tend to be a bit soft, and I like the more asshole dogs, hence my attraction to dachshunds and terriers.

I could still run rabbits with one of these dogs, and while I'd be out of terrier events, I could give gun dog field trials a shot. They sound really interesting, so it'd be fun to branch out to. And of course there are tons of wockers who compete in sports.

Either sex would probably integrate with my current pack just fine. I have a huge soft spot for these guys.

If we really want to branch out, I'd look into the basset fauve de bretagne.

I know almost nothing about them other than I've seen one in person and it was adorable. It's a long-bodied, short-legged hound, of course I like it. It was also in an ex-pen filled with dachshunds so clearly there is some overlap here.

Main issues are a) I know very little about them so I'd have to do a fuckton of research, b) wirehair, which automatically disqualifies them, and c) much, much larger than I want in a small dog.

But I could rabbit with it, and could enter it in hunt trials and possibly basset field trials. It would be hell on wheels with nosework; I'm not sure how it would be in agility or racing, outside of a training challenge.

Also, look at it. Adorable!

So I haven't found a small breed that checks all my boxes in the way that dachshunds do, so branching out would mean I need to compromise on something. Russell terriers fit my desires the best, so that would be my first pick if I decided to leave dachshunds for whatever reason.

Thanks for asking!

[youngestrunningleek]

Urchin and the Heartstone

We’re going back to Mistmantle, baby!

Today’s review is The Mistmantle Chronicles, Book 2: Urchin and the Heartstone. This was published in 2006, written by M. I. McAllister and illustrated by Omar Rayyan.

Content warning: this review will mention vomit and ableism (again)

This is the first sequel I’ve reviewed. I was not very detailed about the plot in my first review, but this one will get more in-depth. I’m also not going to explain the premise as much since I covered that in the last book.

In this book, the protagonist Urchin is kidnapped and brought to another island called Whitewings. All the while, the Heartstone that Mistmantle needs to crown a king is missing.

I really liked this book’s focus on the difficulties of running the island. The Heartstone is missing because of the bad guy from the last book. And some of the problems on Whitewings are caused by all the soldiers that Mistmantle exiled at the end of book one. It felt like the right balance between new challenges and connecting to the first book. It’s not as simple as replacing a bad king with a good king.

This book had two issues that the first book also had. For one thing, the middle bit is kind of boring. There’s a lot of “character A B C finds out that character X Y Z is doing something”. And we have to talk about the number of characters.

During this book, I started writing a character guide on a bookmark. It was simple things like “Whittle, training as lawyer and historian”. By the end, my scrap of paper was running out of space, with 18 characters, and I was still having double-take moments near the end of the book.

I wonder how this would go over as a visual format. Comics, TV shows, etc tend to be able to get away with more characters.

One other issue I have is with the A and B plots. For a book called “Urchin and the Heartstone” it’s not really about Urchin doing anything with the Heartstone. It’s moreso a book about Urchin, which also has some parts about the Heartstone. Because we had Urchin kidnapped on an entirely different island, it was very hard to care about the Heartstone search on Mistmantle. It sort of just deus ex machina’s itself into appearing, once he’s back home.

And speaking of deus ex machina, the bad guys' castle sinks into the ground at the end. There's no final confrontation.

Urchin is kind of a MacGuffin in his own way. People on Whitewings want a Marked Squirrel, so they take Urchin because his fur is mostly white. He's central to the plot because the bad guys decided he was central to the plot. It does make me wonder why the cover doesn’t show him that way, though. He’s pretty obviously a plain red squirrel on the cover.

All that said… I loved this book. It’s an excellent sequel to an excellent book!

So, let’s list some of the great things.

For one, the reunification at the end of the book really is delightful. Too many characters or not, I love this cast. And it’s so heart-warming to see the whole island celebrating the heroes’ return. After he spends so much of the book trapped alone in a tower, Urchin “was back among animals who hugged you and squashed up beside you and didn’t mind much what you smelled of”. D'aww.

Another cute image is children making snow-squirrels with tails that fell off.

I also think it’s very notable that this book doesn't have many evil disabled people. So often in children’s books, especially in animal books, villains have scars or mental illnesses. There is some of that, but it’s much better than the average story in my opinion.

Ableism, or generally fear of difference, is always a villainous trait. Urchin is called a freak on Whitewings, even though his fur is just a different color.

There’s also a pattern where the priests of islands have some kind of disability, like Brother Fir on Mistmantle having a limp. Juniper is another priest-like squirrel. He was hidden away from the culling because of his turned-in paw, and he also has a lung condition.

Generally, I admire that McAllister tells a solid good-versus-evil story. There’s powerful imagery of dust, decay and death for the bad guys. But, there are still gray areas, such as Scatter the squirrel deciding to be loyal to Mistmantle instead of Whitewings. That doesn’t mean she’s automatically innocent, though. The book doesn’t put everyone into a box of either good or evil, and it doesn’t completely ignore someone’s problems if they’re on the side of good.

I do feel obliged to address the inter-species biases… But frankly, I think this book handles them excellently! There’s a moment early on where a squirrel says otters and moles would rather be in the water, or underground, than rule the island. That got my hackles up.

But, after a second reading, it’s not the text itself saying that. It’s the characters. They’re not treating that opinion as fact.

Later, there’s an attempted coup by hedgehogs. I was very surprised about how firm the book is about their “hedgehogs are the only ones who should be in charge” rhetoric. Basically everyone, hedgehog or not, shuts them down immediately.

I appreciate that because, in real life, there are biases. There will be prejudice, and it’s more realistic to show people working through it than to show none at all.

Also, it’s cool that the dynamics vary over time and in different places. Whitewings has moles, hedgehogs and squirrels, but no otters.

A cool piece of worldbuilding from this book was the way the Heartstone works. It jumps out of your hands unless you’re worthy. Also, the reason people can take mole tunnels between islands is that the tunnels predate the water. Cool! Wind Waker made me love anything where the current world is just a flooded version of the old one.

This book had swans, like the last one. But here they are basically mounts. I don't even think we directly hear dialogue from them, even though last book had an island ruled by swans. Weird.

Also, I am pretty sure these guys are human-sized with human lifespans. But, they mention a dead sparrow on a kind of stretcher, at one point. Not sure what that means. Are sparrows the same size as the people? A human doesn't need a stretcher to carry a dead sparrow.

One final note, since I talked about it in the last review: an early chapter of this book had a squirrel throwing up. Wow… they don’t just have human abilities of language and tool-making, they can also vomit like us…

My rating: 4

Overall rating: 4

[guilty-pleasures21]

Chapter 5 - the opera

Part A

Part B

Part C

Warnings: none.

----------------------------------------------------------

     “So,” Anjali began, sidling up next to her sister in their carriage, “you’re sitting next to Miguel, yes? I can sit next to Gabe and Rohan and Pav can sit next to each other. It’s so great that we’re an even number now!”

     Rohan raised an eyebrow at his sister’s uncharacteristic enthusiasm and Anjali narrowed her eyes at him, warning him to not say anything about it. But X didn’t seem to notice anyway as she continued to gaze at the floor of the carriage. 

     “Oh, um …” Her heart thudded in her chest as she considered sitting next to Miguel, his woodsy scent curling around her, his warm breath tickling her neck everytime he leaned over to translate something for her. Her stomach buzzed with excitement at the very thought and she frowned as she tried to tamp down the unwelcome emotion. “Perhaps … I could sit with you, Anjali!”

     She brightened up as the idea entered her mind, suddenly feeling in better spirits about the whole event. “I am always sitting with Miguel, I am sure he would appreciate a break from my constant queries.”

     Anjali let out an incredulous snort at the suggestion. “Please, Penji, I think he is the only one of us who would never tire of your queries.”

     X frowned, surprised by her sister’s reaction. “What do you mean?” 

     “Well, you both share the same curiosity for … most everything in life,” Anjali pointed out. “He always seems so delighted to discuss his new learnings with you.” 

     X fell silent as she thought about it; about the delight that would illuminate Miguel’s features whenever she asked him about something unfamiliar or when he was teaching her about some new theory he’d recently come upon. The carriage slowed to a stop and X realised that she’d been smiling at the image of Miguel’s bright eyes and his elated smile and the excitement that carried through his words whenever he spoke to her. She shook the thought away and took a quick moment to compose herself before stepping out of the carriage. She placed her hand in the one stretched out towards her, allowing herself to be helped down. But unfortunately, she missed the last step and pitched forward precariously. 

     “X!” Miguel exclaimed, grabbing her by the waist before she landed on the ground. “Are you all right?” 

     Her heart pounded in her chest as the adrenaline rushed through her veins and she raised her gaze to meet his. But then her eyes landed on his lips and all she could think about was how soft they looked and how warm he felt, his strong arms wrapped around her to hold her steady against him. 

     She didn’t respond and his breath hitched in his throat when he noticed where her attention had fallen. He swallowed hard at the way her eyes had darkened, then bent over slightly as his hands unconsciously pulled her closer to him. 

     Her hands made their way up his chest as he tugged her towards him and her stomach flipped over excitedly at how close they had gotten to one another. She tilted her head to the side, angling her mouth towards his, and her eyelids fluttered shut as she felt his warm breath brush across her lips. 

     His fingers ached with the desire to reach up and stroke the soft skin of her cheek; to hold her close to him as he finally met her lips and found out for himself how sweet she really tasted … but there were too many people around. He gritted his teeth and forced himself to take a step back. 

     “Don’t fall in love with me, princesa,” he warned her softly. X blinked her eyes open, confused by the sudden turn of events. Then she gasped and jumped away from him when she realised what she’d just been about to do. She turned away from Miguel, completely mortified by her own actions, and studiously avoided his gaze as she straightened her dress. Goodness, what a terrible idea that would have been, kissing him in front of everyone! Or just kissing him anyway! Why in Heaven’s name would she even want to kiss him?! He was so … infuriating and … cheeky! And so incredibly full of himself, swaggering around and smiling at every young woman who passed him by like he was God’s gift to the world or something. 

     “Miguel? Lady X?” Gabe called to them as he walked over. “Is everything all right?” He glanced back and forth between them, confused by their awkward glances and inexplicable silence. 

     She felt a wave of relief wash over her when she saw Gabe: sweet, gentle Gabe, the epitome of a well-mannered gentleman, the perfect choice for a respectable husband. He quirked an eyebrow at her in question and she responded with a reassuring smile, letting him know that everything was all right. He held his elbow out to her and she leaned over to Miguel before accepting it, keeping her voice low so Gabe wouldn’t overhear. 

     “Don’t make me, Miguel,” X muttered under her breath, her tone firm and unyielding. Then she plastered a smile on her face and walked off with his brother, not even sparing him a second glance as she made her way into the theatre. 

     Anjali stood in the main hall, waiting for her sister to stroll in together with Miguel. She’d noticed the way X had started freezing up just at the mention of him, so she hadn’t said anything when he’d gone over to help her down from the carriage. But goodness, she hoped her sister would get over it soon: the two of them were so well-suited to one another, they would make each other so happy once they finally got together. 

     “Lady Anjali!” Anjali turned in the direction of the gasp and smiled when she saw one of her good friends.

     “Lady Gayatri!” she exclaimed in return. “I did not know you would be here today!” 

     “Indeed,” Gayatri agreed, exchanging a brief hug with her friend, “but how wonderful it is to bump into you like this.” She smiled at Rohan in greeting, then widened her eyes in question when her gaze landed on Pav. 

     “Oh! Gayatri, allow me to introduce our cousin, Pavitr,” Anjali began. “He has just come over from India and will be staying with us for a while.” 

     Gayatri turned to Pavitr and her smile brightened once again. “It is nice to meet you, Pavitr.” 

     His mind went completely blank as he gazed up at her in awe. She had to be the most beautiful and elegant young lady he had ever seen in his life! He fixed her with a dopey smile, then flinched when he felt a sharp pain in his side. He turned to his right and saw Rohan silently gesturing for him to say something. 

     “O-Oh! Uh … Nice to meet you, Lady Gayatri.” He fell into a bow at the last second - much too low for someone of her station - and Gayatri giggled softly at his error. 

     “Have you been to the opera before, Pavitr?” she asked. 

     “No,” he replied, shaking his head enthusiastically. “But Lord Miguel was explaining to me the story early. It seems rather … sad.” 

     Gayatri nodded her head in understanding. “But it is so beautiful the way they express themselves. The music, the harmonies, the costumes!” 

     Pav smiled as he watched the way Gayatri’s features lit up with delight as she spoke of the performances. “I see you are quite passionate about the opera, my lady.” 

     Gayatri paused, embarrassed by the vigour with which she was speaking. “Oh, yes, well, I … They work so hard … do they not? I just want them … to be well appreciated.” 

     She forced a small smile back onto her face, but Pav ploughed on, oblivious to her sudden discomfort. “Do you play any instruments, Lady Gayatri?” 

     “Well, I play the pianoforte, of course. Like any other accomplished young woman …” Her words trailed off until she was basically muttering the last bit, her words soured by an undertone of disappointment. Fortunately for her, Pavitr still did not seem to notice. 

     “I would love to hear you play some time, Lady Gayatri,” he admitted. “And sing as well! You must have such a lovely singing voice.” 

     A soft blush coloured Gayatri’s cheeks as she finally started paying attention to the young man’s generous flattery. “Oh, please. You are too kind, Pavitr.”

     She lowered her gaze, suddenly shy. “But, um, I believe the show will be starting soon. Until we meet again?” 

     “Until then, my lady.” 

     He strode into their reserved box, heading straight for his usual seat next to his friend. To his surprise, however, he found it to already be occupied. Miguel’s jaw tightened, but he kept his features straight as he waited for his brother to get out of his seat. 

     “I think you’re in my seat, brother,” he pointed out finally, irritated by Gabe’s refusal to move. Gabe twisted around to look up at him and Miguel felt his chest tighten as his brother shared a look with their neighbour. 

     “Well, actually, we thought it would be a good idea for you to introduce Pavitr to the opera,” Gabe suggested. “You are the most well-versed in it, after all.”

     There was no hint of sarcasm in his brother’s tone, but Miguel still felt offended by his words. And also, what was with this ‘we’ business? There was no ‘we’ when it came to his brother and X. Their neighbour was more than capable of thinking for herself - she didn’t need Gabriel to speak on her behalf. Miguel turned his glare to X and waited for her to argue - to tell Gabe that he should sit with her cousin instead because Miguel was the one she always sat next to. But she kept her head lowered, studiously avoiding his gaze. Miguel huffed in frustration and stalked over to Anjali instead: it wouldn’t be fair for him to ruin Pavitr’s first time at the opera with his sour mood. 

     Anjali raised an eyebrow as Miguel dropped into the seat beside her, the irritation radiating off him in waves. “Miguel?” 

     He inhaled slowly, taking a moment to calm himself down before he unintentionally snapped at Anjali. “It would seem that you and I will be partners for tonight’s play, Anjali. My brother has decided that he would like to sit next to your sister tonight.” 

     What? That hadn’t been part of the plan. Anjali furrowed her brow and opened her mouth to object, but decided against it when she saw Miguel’s arms folded tightly across his chest. Instead, she sank back into her seat and set her mind to inventing another scheme.

Continue

[brucequeensteen]

8, 9, 19, 22, 23, and 26 for the mash asks <3333333

8. what’s your favorite ridiculous storyline ?

s2e2 5 o'clock charlie is one of my favourite episodes and also one of the funniest storylines and i think it counts as pretty ridiculous, what with the various ways trapper and hawkeye try to stop frank from firing the gun at the plane and the various ways frank fails without anyone else even trying. also the whole premise of 5 o'clock charlie is hilarious. but a close second is s5e6 the abduction of Margaret because a) anything involving colonel Flagg is ridiculous b) frank assuming she's been kidnapped by communists is very silly c) it could all have been easily avoided if klinger had just remembered to tell everyone where Margaret went and I relate to that ❤️

9. episode you could genuinely write an entire essay on?

there's definitely quite a few. the two that come to mind are s2e6 'Kim' with a focus on Trapper and the phenomenon of orphaned kids in war and members of "the other side" feeling the need to take care of them, and s5e22 'Movie Tonight' because I love "a movie within a movie" and the way it sort of reflects on itself as a show (fictional people in a real war watching a movie with fictional conflict vs real people watching a tv show about fictional people in a real war)

19. favorite character that’s talked about but never onscreen?

sparky! he's done so much for radar and mash 4077, he always comes through for the favours radar asks of him and generally sounds like a cool guy, seems to be good company down at the other end of the radio :) and the way Radar always gets so enthusiastic talking to him i like to imagine they have a really good relationship :) I'd also love to be in sparky's position tbh. I'd love to be in his position.

22. a klinger outfit you’d want to “borrow" (and probably never give back)?

most of klinger's outfits are too femme for me and most i appreciate their beauty and grace in the way that *he* wears them, but i love his cute little nurse outfit complete with the cape and everything

Next halloween costume... images taken from tumblr user klingerfashionarchive

23. a storyline you wish they’d gone a little deeper on?

i don't even know. Anything involving trapper, especially his kids, like in Kim or the first mail call episode. also Henry's death! I think the show could have referred to Henry a lot more because after Abyssinia Henry the only time I remember the consequences of his death being shown is in s4e4 the late captain pierce when Hawk says "Henry's dead and they're still coming" but idk! I feel like I didn't see it leave enough of an impact on radar 💔 or hawkeye and Margaret, who were the ogs who knew him best. or even potter, who's taking the place of a dead man! maybe I'll write my own episode

26. blog gets to pick whichever question they want to answer

answering question 5: do you have a favorite patient? it's definitely the guy in s6e16 patient 4077 who they try the new clamp on and is so delighted about it he's like "i'll send you guys Christmas presents every Hanukkah" I remember him always because a) Jewish mention! and b) he was just happy to be there and happy to be alive. honourable mention to s1e17 Tommy gillis who was the first important guy to die in mash he did so much for the lgbt community 🫡

[lys-9-10]

Sequel to "Cats, Mud Puddles, Balderdash and Other Signs of Friendship"

Ch. 1 of the sequel now posted on AO3! (will have 2 chapters and a brief epilogue). I guess this is kinda both a sequel and a prequel, b/c we get some Bokuto backstory. :) Preview below image.

Preview:

Five-year-old Koutaro runs outside immediately upon seeing his father’s car pull up in the driveway.

“Daddeeeeee!” he squeals, as the man climbs out of the vehicle. With one hand, Koutaro clutches a volleyball to his stomach. With the other, he pulls on his father’s pant leg. “Play volleyball with me, Daddy?”

Koutaro’s father gives his leg a shake, dislodging his child’s tiny fingers.

“Koutaro, I just got home. Let me have some space to breathe, please.”

A whine starts to work its way up Koutaro’s throat—but then he remembers that his father doesn’t like those sounds, so he pushes it down.

“Okay, okay!” he says instead, rather cheerfully. “Later!”

Koutaro’s father walks into the house, closing the door behind him.

For the next several minutes, Koutaro sits on the front porch, alternating between tapping his knees with his hands and thumping the ground with both feet at the same time. At one point, he sees a yellow bird and cocks his head at it curiously. The bird cocks its head back. Koutaro’s plump face breaks into a delighted grin and he jumps up, ready to run toward the bird and play with it.

The bird flaps its wings and takes off into the air.

Koutaro’s shoulders slump and he goes back to sitting on the porch.

Some time later, the front door swings open and Koutaro once again bounces to his feet.

“Daddeeeee! Is later now??”

It isn’t his father. It’s his mother, and she holds a finger to her lips.

“Shhh, Koutaro. Daddy is taking a nap. You want to walk to the store with Mommy?”

 Koutaro knows that the store sometimes means getting a cheese stick or a meat bun or something else yummy. (But not candy. Mommy doesn’t let him get candy, because she says they make him too “wild.”) Yet despite the potential of something yummy, Koutaro shakes his head.

“No, no, no store for Ko-ko today. Daddy says he gonna play volleyball with me soon!”

Koutaro’s father had in fact said no such thing and Koutaro’s mother seems to know it as she looks at her son with a pained grimace.

“Koutaro, I told you, Daddy’s sleeping. Come to the store with Mommy.”

--------- Nine-year-old Koutaro’s arm is still reverberating from the spike he hit in their lunch-time scrimmage. The last spike of the game. Match point.

Despite the fact that it’s only elementary school intramurals, and none of his peers had even cared about what the score board said, Koutaro is still drunk with victory. He can’t wait to get home and share his news….

“DAD!” Koutaro hollers as he bursts through the front door to his house. “I scored match point in intramurals today! My spike was sooooo awesome, my arm just went waaaaaaaahh—” He winds back his arm to demonstrate—and freezes. The look on his father’s face as he lifts his head from his newspaper is one of marked irritation.

“Inside voice, Koutaro. Please.”

Koutaro is careful not to talk too much at dinner-time that evening. Which means that he doesn’t talk at all, because he knows by now that he can’t tell what “too much” is by other people’s standards.

Still, Koutaro is bursting with energy—he is on an average day and today he scored match point—so as an outlet he begins rocking his chair back and forth. He relishes the satisfying thump that happens every time the chair falls back to the ground. A slow grin starts to spread across his face. Not talking can be fun too, it turns out.

There’s another thump . It’s not the thump of the chair. It’s the thump of his father’s fist making contact with the table as he angrily sets down his fork.

“Koutaro, please stop rocking your chair. I’m losing my patience.”

Koutaro flinches. Then crumples in on himself as he says quietly, “Sorry Dad.”

----- Fifteen-year-old Koutaro bounds up to his team-mate Konoha after practice.

“Hey hey, Konoha! Practise spikes with me for just a lil’ bit?!”

Koutaro bounces on the balls of his feet, smiling hopefully at the fellow first year. Konoha sighs.

“We literally just finished a three-hour practice, Bokuto-san.” “I knoooow. But I’ve still got so much more in me! Don’t you??” Konoha gives him an exasperated look. “No. I don’t.” Koutaro deflates a little—but then perks up a moment later. “How bout we take a short break then get back at it?! Here, you can have my energy drink! I really don’t need it anyway.” He laughs lightheartedly.

Konoha groans and scrubs a hand over his face. He makes no move to take the drink that Koutaro is eagerly holding out to him. “Bokuto-san, I’m going home. You should too.”

“. . . Oh.” Keiji looks at the floor. “Okay.”

Koutaro stays in the gym for two more hours, practising spikes against the wall. Maybe if he tires himself out—burns all his excess energy—he’ll be less irritating at dinner… ---------

“I’m Akaashi Keiji from Mori middle school. I played setter. It’s an honour to be here.”

Sixteen-year-old Koutaro’s ear perks up when he hears the word “setter”.  

Koutaro is always interested in people, so he was already regarding this new first year with considerable curiousness. (There’s also the fact that the first year’s face is like something out of an air-brushed magazine. That helped too.) But at this word, he scrunches up his fists with excitement and starts quite literally squirming.

A setter!! Maybe this Akashi Keiji will toss for him after practice…

Koutaro ignores the slight twist in his gut that tells him that, based on history, this is unlikely—and skips up to Akashi Keiji once practice ends.

“Heya! You’re Akashi-kun, right?”

Akashi looks up from the broom he’d been pushing. His face is remarkably expressionless—but Koutaro thinks that maybe his eyes widen the slightest fraction of a millimetre, for the slightest fraction of a second. Koutaro winces. Maybe Akashi is shy? Koutaro has been know to scare off shy first years…

Akashi clears his throat. “It’s Ah-ka-ah-shi.”

Koutaro smacks himself in the face, with unnecessary dramatics. “Whooooops! Sorry, Ah-ka-ah-shi-kun!”

“No need.”

Koutaro grins, then moves a step closer to Akaashi. “Say, mind practising spikes with me for just a lil’ bit?” He holds up his thumb and forefinger, about an inch apart, to demonstrate the small amount of time he’s asking for. 

Despite the sunny grin on his face, Koutaro is already bracing himself for the “no”. Especially when Akaashi’s eyes widen another fraction of a millimetre and Koutaro is positive he’s scared him off.

“Sure.”

Koutaro blinks. He takes a startled step back. “Huh?”

Behind him, he’s become aware that Konoha is staring at them.

“Sure,” Akaashi repeats. “If you want me to.” And then, after a slight cough, he adds. “I’m a rookie though. I’m not used to setting for star players, so you might have to be patient.”

Koutaro hears Konoha letting out a guffaw. But he doesn’t pay him any mind. He’s too busy beaming from ear-to-ear.

It wasn’t even that Akaashi had called him a star player; he hadn’t even registered that, really. Normally, a comment like that would be enough to get Koutaro preening and flexing his muscles. But in this case, he’d stopped listening as soon as Akaashi had repeated the word “Sure.”

“Alright!!” Koutaro springs at Akaashi and claps him heartily on the back. “You’re the best, kouhai!”

------- They practise for more than a little bit. After the first half hour, Koutaro is expecting Akaashi to initiate stopping any minute now. And he’s trying really really hard to mentally prepare himself to not beg for more time.

Don’t do it, he sternly orders himself. It was very nice of Akaashi-kun to stay with you this long. When he asks to go, let him go.

But Koutaro feels sinking dread in his gut as he wonders whether he’ll be able to obey his own instructions or not. Mom has told Koutaro he has problems with “impulse control”. He thinks this sort of thing is what she means.

As it turns out, Koutaro’s capacity for impulse control never gets tested. Because Akaashi doesn’t initiate stopping. Not after the first half hour. Not after the first full hour. 

His body does start to flag a little, and he’s drenched in sweat… but he keeps putting the ball up for Koutaro. Really well, too. “Your sets are the best!” Koutaro exclaims, throwing his arms wide with enthusiasm.

There’s an almost imperceptible shift of something in Akaashi’s eyes—and then he says in the most neutral tone one could imagine: “Thank you.”

Koutaro can’t help but laugh out loud. This rookie is so funny.

“Do you ever get excited about anything?!” Koutaro asks, still snorting giggles through his nose.

Akaashi appears to consider the question for a moment. “Rarely,” he says at last.

That prompts another bout of laughter on Koutaro’s part.

But later, as Koutaro is walking home, he sobers and bites his bottom lip as he recalls Akaashi’s response. He can’t help but feel envious… Maybe if he spends a lot of time with Akaashi, the rookie’s lack of excitement will start to rub off on him?? And he wouldn’t be so “much” anymore…

Suddenly, Koutaro finds himself smiling again, his dark mood swiftly dissipating. Spending a lot of time with Akaashi! That would be fun.

/preview. Read the rest on AO3! :)

[edwardian-girl-next-door]

Feast Day: Michaelmas, or St. Michael and All the Angels

"The Three Archangels and Tobias" by Francesco Botticini (1470). Michael is on the far left, wearing some snazzy armour (via wikimedia commons)

Happy Michaelmas!

Michaelmas celebrates the Archangels Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael; and in Anglican and Episcopalian tradition includes two other angels from apocryphal (not in Biblical canon) texts named Uriel and Jerahmeel. However, as the name suggests, most of the day is about Michael. Regarded as the warrior who drove Satan out of heaven, Michael is associated strongly with protection and military might. He is the patron saint of police officers, warriors, the sick, mariners, against lightning and windstorms, and of many places including France, Germany, Vatican City, and Ukraine and its capital Kyiv.

Michaelmas was one of the major observed saint's days in mediaeval and early modern England, Scotland, and Ireland. Keep reading to find learn about how the Devil was yeeted from heaven, if you're going to get married soon, and why you shouldn't eat blackberries after October 10th.

History

As an angel, Michael doesn't have a 'life', per se, but he is well-known and venerated in a variety of Abrahamic religions. The earliest recorded mention of his is from the Book of Enoch, a Hebrew apocalyptic text from the 3rd century BCE. The Book of Enoch contains other bits of juicy information on the origin of demons, moral justification for the great flood in Genesis, why some angels fell from heaven, and a prophecy for the thousand-year reign of the Messiah. Though it is not accepted as canon in Christian and Jewish traditions, it provides extra scholarship on canon occurrences and apocryphal traditions. Michael is not given an introduction by the Book of Enoch, implying that readers would already be familiar with him, and his legend may date back much farther. He is mentioned in the Book of Daniel, which is included in the Christian Old Testament and is one of the Jewish Talmudic writings. The Quran and Hadīth also acknowledge Michael as an archangel (often spelled Mika'il).

In the Christian Bible, Michael is explicitly mentioned in Jude 9, Daniel 7, and Revelation 12:7-12. This last passage is the most famous, and depicts Michael doing battle with the Devil and driving him out of heaven. As a result, he has very militaristic associations, often portrayed as the leader of the armies of God in the warfare between Heaven and Hell, good and evil. In the mediaeval and early modern world, people lived with these images and concepts in their everyday lives. Vivid depictions of the Last Judgement, or the end of the world, adorned church walls -- they make up a whole genre, called "doom paintings", and were often on the west wall of the church, which was most visible to the congregation. They sent powerful, unmistakable messages to those who could not read or understand the Latin service. In addition, many people lived with firsthand experiences with brutal, real world conflict; and the power of the church in law and society created overwhelming preoccupation with the afterlife. We have only to look to paintings like Bosch's The Garden of Earthly Delights of Hans Memling's The Last Judgement to see what nightmare fuel people truly believed in and feared. Michael was therefore an important protector figure in a serious battle against the forces of evil -- the OG Satanic Panic, 24/7.

"The Last Judgement" by Hans Memling (c.1466-1473). The right panel depicts heaven, the left panel depicts hell, and the middle panel depicts the judgement process, with Michael weighing souls in the foreground while Jesus looks on. (via wikimedia commons)

Doom painting in Salisbury's Church of St. Thomas a Beckett. Again, Heaven is depicted on the right, and hell is swallowing people on the left. I don't know about you, but seeing this every Sunday as a kid would have given me religious trauma they haven't even discovered yet. (via seeingthepast.com)

A little bit about the other angels commemorated: Gabriel is responsible for announcing God's will to humanity, and communicates the birth of Jesus to Mary and of John the Baptist to her sister Elizabeth, respectively. Raphael is not mentioned in the Bible, but tradition identifies him as a healing angel who stirred the waters at the Pool of Bethesda (John 5:2-4). Uriel is also not mentioned in the Bible, but is in texts recognised as apocryphal by the Roman Catholic Church, and is also a figure in folk Catholicism. He is usually depicted as a cherub, representing repentance and holding the keys to Hell. Jerahmeel is mentioned in texts recognised as apocryphal by the Anglican Communion, and serves as a gatekeeper to Heaven with St. Peter and guides souls on their journey to the afterlife. All around pretty metal stuff.

Michaelmas and its Traditions

As Michael served as a benevolent force against darkness and evil, his commemoration asked for protection in the cold, long winter nights, where Satan's powers were supposedly more powerful.

Harvest activities, from the glorious Luttrell Psalter (c.1320-1340) (via johnclare.net)

In mediaeval England, Michaelmas marked the start of a new agricultural year, when the harvest ended and people could start preparing for the coming winter. In England, Ireland, and Wales, it was one of the quarter days, or four days during which major legal business was settled. Contracts for would begin or expire, rents and taxes were collected, school terms would start, &c. Hiring fairs were held around Michaelmas for labourers and servants looking for work. On manors, a "reeve" or estate manager would be chosen from among the peasants. Following this custom, the Lord Mayor of London is still elected on Michaelmas; and some British and Irish law courts and universities use a "Michaelmas term" to denote an autumn session or semester.

Michaelmas earned the name "Goose Day" from the tradition of eating a roast goose on this holiday. The end of September and beginning of October are naturally when geese were ready for eating, and they were also common fare for celebrations in general. Geese prepared for this time of year were referred to as a stubble-goose or an embling or rucklety goose. Goose fairs proliferated up and down the country, selling geese and other food, as well as providing entertainment. (The Nottingham Goose Fair continues in this tradition, happening around October 3rd every year.) A likely apocryphal legend provides a fun reason behind this tradition: Queen Elizabeth I was eating a goose when she heard of the defeat of the Spanish Armada in 1588, and vowed to eat it for Michaelmas. Others followed suit, and thus goose-eating helped ensure financial security for the year to come. Geese were also a great way to bribe your landlord, as including one with your rent might gain you a little more favour. Another fun goose tidbit: if the breast bones of the goose are brown after roasting, the winter will be mild, but if they were white or of a slightly blue hue, the winter will be harsh.

Gathering blackberries after Michaelmas (old style October 10th) was deemed unlucky. Supposedly, when Michael cast Satan out of heaven, Satan landed in a blackberry bush and got tangled in its brambles. Cursing the bush, Satan either spit, stamped, scorched, or peed on it, or a combination of all of those things, making the fruit unfit to eat after that date. Blackberry pies, called Michaelmas pies, were often made to use up the last of the blackberry harvest. In Ireland, bad blackberries are also attributed to púca, a shape-shifting spirit that can bring both good and evil.

Michaelmas bannock with blackberries (via allthehousehold.com)

Scotland and Ireland also have unique celebrations from those in England and Wales. In parts of Scotland, particularly the Hebrides, the eldest daughter of the family baked Sruthan Mhìcheil, or St. Michael's bannock, on the eve of Michaelmas. Sruthan Mhìcheil is a scone-like bread or cake, consisting of equal parts barley, rye, and oats, and without using any metal implements. Some recipes are cooked in lamb skin. As the person making the Sruthan turns it on the fire, they utter a variant of this blessing over it: "Progeny and prosperity of family, Mystery of An Dagda, protection of Bride". There is also a Hebridean blessing which runs: "Là Fhéill Mìcheil nì sinn struthan, Gabhaidh sinn dheth gu cridheil cairdeil, Mar bu choir a bhith" or, in English, "On St Michael’s Day we will make a cake, we will partake of it in a joyful friendly manner, as is proper". Special Sruthans, made in memory of absent loved ones or those who have died, are blessed at Michaelmas mass and given to the poor.

Another Scottish tradition involves carrots, the last of which are supposed to be pulled up on Michaelmas day. Finding a two-pronged carrot is considered extra lucky! There's a Gaelic rhyme for this task, too, which accompanies the carrot pulling: "Torcan torrach, torrach, torrach, Sonas curran còrr orm, Michael mil a bhi dha m’chonuil, Bride gheal dha m’chonradh" or in English, "Cleft fruitful, fruitful, fruitful, Joy of carrots surpassing upon me, Michael the brave endowing me, Bride the fair be aiding me."

I found a good deal of Irish traditions relating to Michaelmas, varying region by region. One legend tells of a king who choked to death on a goose bone and was brought back to life by St. Patrick. In honour of the saint, he ordered goose to be eaten on Michaelmas. In parts of Ireland, geese were given to the poor, and in some regions slaughtered sheep were also thrown in with the donation. Many people took pilgrimages to holy wells associated with Michael to take a drink from the blessed waters. A ring would sometimes me placed in a Michaelmas pie, and the person to find it would be married soon.

Towns often implemented winter curfew on Michaelmas. The church bell would ring at 9pm, once for every day of the month that had passed, to remind everyone to get inside. Curfews usually lasted from Michaelmas (September 29th) to Shrove Tuesday or Lady Day (March 25th), another quarter day. Chertsey in Runnymeade, Surrey, still rings a curfew bell between these dates; their oldest church bell dates from 1380.

Michaelmas dasies (via butterfly-conservation.org)

Michaelmas daisies, or asters, bloom around this time of year, one of the last flowers to bloom before the onset of winter. Some say they represent a final, hearty burst of light before the darkness and barrenness of winter, just like the celebration of Michaelmas. A rhyme says: "The Michaelmas Daisies, among dede weeds, / Bloom for St Michael’s valorous deeds. / And seems the last of flowers that stood, / Till the feast of St. Simon and St. Jude." (Sts. Simon and Jude is October 28th).

And of course, no feast day would be complete without a plethora of weather wisdom! Here are a few:

"If Michaelmas bring many acorns, Christmas will cover the fields with snow."

"If the ice is strong enough to bear a man before Michaelmas, it will not bear a goose afterwards." (see Martinmas, November 11th)

"So many days old the moon is on Michaelmas Day, so many floods after."

"If St. Michael bring thunder, rough weather will follow."

Thomas Tusser also advises to pick fruit after Michaelmas if you want it to last the winter.

If You're Still Interested...

Here is a Michaelmas bannock recipe, from the picture above!

Sources

Wikipedia (Michaelmas)

Wikipedia [Michael (archangel)]

agecrofthall.org

projectbritain.com

historic-uk.com

britannica.com

nts.org

A Countryman's Daybook, ed. C. N. French

[tigers1o1]

What’s your favorite song on the OST? Mine is Sureshot and Prophetic Screwup b/c I’m just imaging the delight of a professional orchestra being told “ok do it again but Badly!” that must’ve been so cathartic for them.

Okay so: for context, I am not a musical person. I know hardly anything about music theory, and everything I know, I picked up through osmosis when I was in colorguard and would overhear the marching band’s stuff

- I really like This Is My Destiny (Gillion). Overall, it’s really vibey, but I like the bpm changes. Is very good soup

- Pirates Legacy (Chip) means SOOOO much to me because Chip is just a TRAGIC character, and this song showcases that. I could talk about the tragedy of Chip for HOURS bro it’s such an issue

-and I also like That Bastard Pirate (Chip) purely bc of the characterization. Characterizing is something that’s hard for me, but that song NAILED Chips character and I respect it so much for that

I’m also just partial for Chip’s songs in general bc OUGH they’re all so perfect for his character and I’m- *shakes you* insane about him.

[mermaidsirennikita]

I think he kinda bit himself in the ass because this is so clearly just a oscar play. Sure they want you to want it but when you want it too much they're not gonna give it to you.

I honestly think that either way it would've been pretty hard for him because Cillian Murphy is a) campaigning for once b) is campaigning in a way that doesn't seem desperate, and has the kind of artist's vibe that is all "I would appreciate this but I don't need" which can put the Academy in DADDY WATCH ME TWIRL! mode, kinda like Margot Robbie in Actors on Actors with Cillian, which was admittedly delightful c) was in a movie that was both super critically acclaimed and very culturally and financially impactful. I mean, he also anchored the movie.

Buuuut when Maestro loses critical regard as it hits its fully release... when it drops from the Netflix top 10 so quickly... when there's the nose hubbub... The desperation... I mean, on their own none of these things would sink a win for him, and I do think he'll probably be nominated, for Best Actor and possibly Best Director. Together, it's more of an issue.

One of the most incredibly desperate moments I've ever seen on film is that big climactic performance, where he paints it in this incredibly arduous, melodramatic way. And then the credits ends on real footage where Bernstein is obviously putting his all in and very passionate, but not so................ belabored? Like, he seems as if he enjoys himself because he... does? It's his passion lmao? I mean, that exemplifies someone doing something because it is in their veins and they are an artist and they do love it, versus someone desperately trying to sell the image of themselves as an artist like Cooper. And seeing that footage, I was like "damn, that guy does seem amazing and deserved a better movie".

[crystalelemental]

All supports have been achieved, so this is my tier list for the characters.  As characters.  Not combat performance.  I am in no way equipped to make a tier list on combat performance.  To give the general breakdown...

S: Favorites.  Like, above and beyond favorites.

A: By quality, just as good as S, but didn’t quite hit the same favoritism button

B: Still good, but a little more one-note, or less interesting overall.

C: Starting to lose interest.  They’re not bad, but their supports were mostly just checking boxes.

D: Verging on active dislike.  Really didn’t do much that was engaging.

F: I am actively annoyed by you.

S TIER

Veyle.  That’s BABY.  I’ve seen people refer to this as a “Julia Archetype,” and immediately it’s like “oh yeah, that tracks.”  Only Veyle like...there.  Like she gets real lines of dialogue and agency and stuff.  And I love her.  Baby child.  Baby.  Almost wish they did a bit more with Nega-Veyle, since that side seemed to have its own hangups, but maybe the DLC, eh?

Celine.  Holy shit what a round of supports this girl’s got.  Celine was on track to be B-tier through a lot of this, since almost everything focuses on tea, but the development she gets from Alear and Alfred’s supports alone are fantastic.  But you get her and Fogado being friendly but only after putting away the knives.  You get Hortensia, which is adorable, and Alcryst, who is devastating.  Her supports rule.

Goldmary.  I actually married Goldmary first playthrough.  I kinda love her.  the arrogance is spectacular, but all of her supports come around to her being legitimately kind and thoughtful.  I think my favorite angle, though, is her backstory on why she’s like this.  Because she’ll present it as her reason, but it’s so...delightfully mundane.  She’s a lot of fun.  I think I really like how much it’s showcased that her appearance is hard-earned.  Like, she tries really hard to maintain this image, and while it’s a lot of work, it’s what she wants.  My wife has a fun stance on how it relates to femininity broadly, and how everything you do is supposed to be elegant down to things that typically aren’t like crying, and how she narrates it like it’s an elegant, beautiful thing she’s doing.  I’ll leave it to her if she wants to post it.

Panette.  Okay so by design and class designation, Panette was one of the earliest characters I knew I’d like.  I did not expect how much.  I really enjoy Panette; the rebellious child from a bad home, who’s now on the straight and narrow and is over-emphasizing that constantly to avoid slipping up.  She’s a lot of fun too.

Anna.  This is the best iteration of Anna.  Turns out, all they needed to do to achieve peak Anna was make her a baby child who missed her family.  And she’s so uppity, I love it.  “Anna’s too formal, call me Lady Anna.”  And just how she develops her products.  I dunno, I feel like this was the answer all along.  Just give Anna supports.  Flesh her out, it’ll be great.  And it was.  It was so great.

A TIER

Yunaka.  Yunaka, despite not being one of my favorites, has a good argument for being the best character in the game.  While a lot of her supports revolve around the assassin thing and not wanting people to know, but when they don’t focus on that, she’s really strong.

Zelkov.  Actually love this guy too.  I didn’t think I would at first, but he grew on me quick.  He’s such a goon in the best way.  And per Alear’s supports, apparently talks like that on purpose to seem profound.  What a delightful lunatic.

Chloe.  While I think in any realistic situation Chloe should probably be B-tier, I admit having a soft spot for the big eaters, and particularly like how her eating habits involve “I’ll eat anything once.”

Framme.  I really, really like Framme too.  She’s energetic and exciteable, and just a lot of fun.  And an absolute disaster child.

Ivy.  Another I wasn’t sure I’d like, but honestly they basically just did Camilla again but without the sibling fetish angle.  Now it’s a worship fetish.  Which is still weird, but at least it only comes up in the Alear support!  Everything else is a delight, though.  Ivy’s fantastic.

Lapis.  Lapis is Chloe-esque, in that her gimmick is she’s poor and trying to hide it, but is really, really bad at hiding it so basically everyone knows.  I think Lapis is just the kind of character I have a soft spot for?  She’s just sweet and adorable.

Alfred.  My sweet boy with rocks for brains.  He is so stupid, I love him dearly.  I think I just love the energy he brings.  I know a lot of people expected more of a refined prince angle, and oh man do I love the swerve.

Rosado.  While Rosado can be a bit one note with the cute thing, I think it’s who he partners with that works out.  Everyone he talks to is about getting them to appreciate or recognize their own cuteness, and it’s great.  Also, Pandreo supports confirm Rosado is a party animal.  And his supports with Seadall confirm he doesn’t know what shampoo is.  I think it’s a bit of a copout to insist it’s just natural based on being from the village of the fair folk, and I think Goldmary’s thing of her elegance being hard-earned and hard to maintain is more real, but Rosado’s fun enough.

Hortensia.  While she can be a little grating, I actually...really like Hortensia.  She gets a lot of development in the main story too, I feel, and her supports were all really strong too.

B TIER

Etie.  Everything is muscles, which is similar to Alfred but she’s not quite as fun.  That said, her dynamic with Alfred is the best, I love those two.  She’s not the most dynamic, but I like her a lot.

Alear.  Actually a really solid protagonist?  B is probably a bit unfair, but gut feel on this placement.  I actually might like Alear more than Robin.  Time will tell, but they made a great showing.

Fogado.  Fogado’s actually a lot of fun, but I feel like they don’t quite do enough with him most of the time.  The only one that really stands out to me as something profound and interesting is Pandreo’s.  In most other situations, he’s fine, but loses points for being the flirty character because I don’t love those.  I want to like him more than I do, is the simple answer.

Pandreo.  PARTY MONK, AR-AROOOOO!  He’s fine.  I expected to like him a lot less than I do, but I did enjoy a lot of how they approached his faith and means of worship.  But I also think he gets hit a bit by the awkwardness of the divine being he worships being...you.  And, eventually, Veyle.  It’s just weird.

Louis.  Actually liked Louis a lot more than I thought I would too.  His people-watching habit was initially offputting, but I like how a lot of supports also emphasize that he is a genuinely caring person, and likes helping others.  He wound up more engaging than I expected.

Merrin.  Actually wound up less engaging.  I expected more out of Merrin, but she’s categorically fine.  She’s trying to be cool, but loses composure when she sees rare critters.  It’s fine, but lacks substance.

Alcryst.  I know a lot of people really like Alcryst.  I like him well enough, but don’t quite feel the same.  I couldn’t tell you why I don’t connect with him as strongly.  It’s kinda weird to me too.  Also hey, all the archers are in B!  That tracks.

Amber.  When I finished my first run, I did not touch Amber.  Never once brought him to a fight.  He shows up pretty late for a lance cav guy when we have Alfred right there, and even he’s not Chloe.  But having used him a bit and gotten his supports...I actually like him?  Similar vibes to Alfred, in that he’s just a fun character.  I feel like they try a bit hard to make him into the butt of a joke, but when he gets to just exist, he’s pretty great.

C TIER

Diamant.  Okay, so.  I don’t care much for Diamant.  He’s not bad, but he’s one of the less interesting royals for sure.  He’s just so...bland.  Like oh yes, I am serious training man who wants to not do war, but my war kingdom is pretty mad about it.  Like it’s fine, it should be more engaging, but it never is.

Timerra.  Meat.  Also she’s wild because she goes out to take down bandits herself.  And through all of that...I really never felt like there was that much to Timerra.   She and Diamant very much brought up the rear in terms of royals.

Lindon.  Lindon’s alright.  I didn’t really connect with him that strongly, but I feel like that’s because he didn’t have more supports like with Mauvier.  If we spent more time on him being unhinged, that’d be great.  But we get a lot of time instead on his being wrapped in the past as an old man, at the decrepit age of...60.  Forewarning, Engage does not know how age works.  We’ll get to a lot of that.  But I do think some of his banter is a lot of fun.

Boucheron.  He cries a lot.  I do like that he’s genuinely a nice guy, but the lack of a more interesting gimmick kinda holds him back.

Clanne.  I feel bad for Clanne.  Framme gets to be this over-excited lunatic child, and Clanne is...shy quiet boy who likes pickles.  But you know, I also have to admit, this archetype is definitely a preference thing that misses me specifically.  You’re supposed to like him or Framme more, and apparently I’m the Framme side.

Jade.  My first response to Jade was F-tier.  Her novels are comedy fanfics about Amber’s misfortunes?  That’s just mean-spirited.  And no, the idea that she wrote one (1) book that makes him seem cool is not sufficient.  But I think repeated exposure to the dry wit and shenanigans made me warm up to her a bit.  Still not a favorite, but she’s fine.

Bunet.  Bunet is just weird enough to stay somewhat interesting.  I feel like if they didn’t let him be completely unhinged about the licking everything he’s interested in tasting, he’d be D-tier.  But, they let the man have a bit of insanity, and for that, C-tier.

Citrinne.  I...don’t know.  I think it’s a personal issue with throwing around wealth in this way, and it doesn’t really connect to much?  Like sure, Alear support makes it clear a person she considered a friend called her cheap for not spending money on them, but I dunno.  Citrinne just doesn’t do it for me.

Jean.  He’s fine.  He wants to be a doctor.  He’s healing people.  He’s a baby child that everyone has to tell to take breaks.  I don’t have strong feelings about Jean.

D TIER

Vander.  Vander is very similar to Bunet, if Bunet weren’t a lunatic about anything.  He just comes across as bland and uninteresting.  He’s just some guy.  I don’t hate him, but he’s...kinda boring.

Saphir.  Alright, let’s get this over with.  Saphir is 35.  I call bullshit.  The Elusian attack happened 30 years ago, but she retains information from her village that is so wildly specific, like how to prepare the food they eat, that there is no way that timeline tracks.  More importantly, so much of her story is based in the trauma and holding in the desire for revenge for the Elusian attack...but man, the main story already confirmed most hostilities are Brodia’s fault.  How much you wanna bet the Elusians attacking are doing so because you’re Brodians living on their land you took over?  I just have a hard time with this one.

Mauvier.  Okay!  This fucker is lucky it’s not F-tier!  Notoriously, I hate the Camus archetypes.  Almost every iteration is a matter of “You could’ve just fixed your shit.”  And if he didn’t get on our side, he’d be down there.  But even with that fix, it feels like too little too late in a very, very dumb way.  Why did you let Marni go?  Like...you knew what would happen.  You knew how this would play out.  Even if it wasn’t immediate, you were willing to fight her and kill her too?  This guy bugs me over that.  That and the whole atonement thing being all he’s got.  All three of the ones I remember not being about that are interesting because of the other character, too.  Mauvier is...fine, I guess.  I don’t hate him.

F TIER

Seadall.  I will admit.  Seadall is not atrocious.  But he’s also more annoying to me than anyone else.  I dunno, I have basically zero connection to the idea of dieting constantly, and the angle of him really wanting all this fried food but denying it because oh his dancing doesn’t do it for me.  Constant denial of your wants isn’t the same as discipline.  And the fortune telling thing is also really not my jam.  I admit he’s probably in F just because of how hard it was to get his supports.  He just keeps dying!  Stop being dead!

Kagetsu.  On his own, Kagetsu is not terrible, but I think what bugs me is the whole “from a different land, everything is so strange” gimmick.  I dunno.  The whole thing is just...kinda annoying after a bit.  And his only real character notes are “likes to fight” and “ran away from home.”  I can get more interesting options elsewhere.