#b/c i want them to have a good time. i don't want to give them a bad time lmao

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Oh, also, I really hope that this point isn't news to anyone, but if you don't already have a basic understanding of what it means to develop information security, now is the fucking time.

Critically, I want to see people being responsible in how they interact with:

A) the dissemination of information and the correction or disruption of misinformation

B) privacy related or personal data (of themselves, but ESPECIALLY of others who you could unknowingly harm)

C) pictures and visual media

D) your bodies: not a good time to start leaving traces of yourself where they shouldn't be, e.g. blood, saliva, etc

E) triangulatory/tangential information (you know that guy who can tell where you are by the weather descriptions? That's an extreme example very few people can pull off, but you'd be horrified how little info I need about someone to correctly interpret whole sections of their personal history and data)

F) other people. If you have never formally done so, find a conflict resolution/group facilitation class with a local organizing group or community college. Start learning what healthy boundaries (flexible, but neither porous nor rigid) look like for you. Pick a communication style to cultivate so you can be consistent in how you navigate stressful moments. Figure out what it means to you to share space with others with intention. (And yes, there is no one way to do this, but every one of us will need to find our most secure version, whatever that is, ESPECIALLY those of us who are already vulnerable here due to past trauma, neurotype, TBI, healthcare/wellbeing needs, etc)

I'm a really open book in a lot of ways, and yall might rightly look at that and go "butts you're one to talk about infosec"

And yeah. Yeah. But like.

I know what you know. I made those choices on purpose or at the very least addressed the aftermath of the accidents with intention. I also know what I did to be protective of myself and my info, and you don't know those things. You should know how to do them for yourself though, because it will help you understand why I can have done what I've done over the years and still say this now.

It matters what people know. It matters how easy that knowledge is to revisit. It matters how much of that knowledge is heresay vs documented and verifiable. It matters what contrary information is ALSO known. It matters what interconnected information about OTHER PEOPLE is known. It matters when you haven't said anything at all versus when you said a bit versus when you said a LOT. It matters when you say a lot without saying anything at all.

Information gathering is about putting together puzzle pieces. It's slow work, and it involves a massive amount of resources to do comprehensively and at scale. Information security is about making the gathering process not worth the investment such that the gatherers give up before they are able to put together enough pieces to do real damage. This is what "need to know" means.

For example, in a healthcare practice, it is a HIPAA requirement that access to protected patient info be limited to those who have a clinically relevant reason for accessing it. This means that certain system credentials or permissions will reveal varying amounts of protected information about a person. While one MIGHT be able to put together enough puzzle pieces for certain minor information gathering from early stages (e.g. where someone will be a the specific time of their appt), one likely cannot identify deeper and more vulnerable levels of information (who is the appt with and what is it for?)

This kind of layered buffer is most important when people who AREN'T PERMITTED (permited as in able to do without effective correction/consequence, not permitted as in legally or appropriately authorized to do) to access this info are trying to access it. If someone is permitted (e.g. if person with the appropriate credentials/access permission discloses it voluntarily or if a subpoena is ordered, etc) then the level of access is less protective - they will typically simply access the level of info they need if they will be permitted to.

But there are further layers still of information security. For example, you can tie up a LOT of time forcing authorized bodies to refresh and specify their authorization over and over again, each time appropriately only providing the exact level of disclosure they have required of you. The more specific the information they are looking for, the easier it is to bury so deep down that they literally cannot access it even if they are looking right at it.

I was taught to write documentation "like at any time it could be read out by the patient in front of you, or by another provider asking us to justify a treatment, or in open court by order of a judge". For a year, my supervisor had me write four copies of every piece of documentation I ever made. My personal copy (burned upon completion of the billable note), my "soft note" that removed all protected/identifiable information from the narrative (e.g. names, ages, genders, specific diagnoses/conditions), my "hardnote" which removed anything "heresay" which had been self-reported by the patient unless I could professionally verify it), and lastly my billable note which I understood needed to offer "detailed justificstion" for the used (and named) interventions which cannot be used to work backwards and interpret the originating care conversation.

The only note that ever gets read by anyone but myself is the billable, because they others are never retained long enough to be seen by others, even if they do have the appropriate access. It becomes very difficult for someone to use the hard data they are capable of getting from me, voluntarily or by force, to actually confirm context. This is a similar principle when orhanizers compartmentalize need-to-information.

So start learning what it looks like to cordon off each layer of infosec you're about to implement in your life. What it will look like to grant someone access to a new layer.

Be responsible. We protect us.

[ronanlynchbf]

see too many ppl still defending jdepp or running with the "mutual abuse" angle so here's a video presenting basically all the (publicly available btw! for anyone to be able to look up!) information on this case. Let it be known if you still support jdepp i am assuming you have never done a grain of research into this in your life and just ran with public opinion and misinformation

[edwardwonghaupepelutivrusky4th]

technically if it's not simmered in the champagne region of france it's a sparkling best boy friend

[alteredphoenix]

Thinking about that one YT video that goes in-depth about liminal spaces in video gaming by sorbino, and how people that view them fall into one of two categories: those that are endowed with nostalgia and the sense that they've been there before (regardless as to whether or not they were born in the era those spaces originated from), and those that feel the looming dread and fear and the hint of otherness, that sensation of wrongness that scrapes along the surface of your brain just looking upon them.

I guess I would fall into the first camp, although not so much with the familiarity and nostalgia; it's more like I can relax and put my guard down when I see them. It reminds me how, as silly and goofy some of these places used to look, they at least had heart to them. Not like today, how you'd look at them from your window out of the car you're in and see the buildings that once were colorful and bombastic are now just redesigned to have the same cold, sterile, corporate aesthetic.

(That's a deeper dive I can get into that sort of goes outside of the bounds of this topic, but I think you get where I'm going with it.)

[lxnarphase]

━━ ❝ GOOD MORNING, BABY !! ❞

☾₊‧⁺...ft. : g. satoru + g. suguru + n. kento + f. toji + k. choso + t. fumihiko

☾₊‧⁺...cw : somnophilia (pre-agreed on), thigh fucking, penetrative sex, pre-established relationship, dirty talk, praise and degradation, mommy kink, breeding kink, satoru and toji are just filthy, choso is so cute and needy, kento is the sweetest husband, it's just really fucking dirty im not sorry

☾₊‧⁺...synopsis : which jjk characters would fuck your thighs while you're sleeping bc they're horny but don't wanna wake you up !!

who does it to tease you ↴

✧ g. satoru ; satoru tries to wake you up, but you just don't want to. and by try, he means he blew into your ear just for you to huff and smack him away, grumbling to let you sleep or you'd bite him. ohh, you are so cute, he just really can't help himself

“look at my pretty girl, such a mess…tsk, wish she'd wake up, now i gotta fuck her soft, pretty thighs instead of that pretty lil' pussy." “aww, your pussy 's so noisy! listen t' her...she's all wet, she's cryin' f'me to fuck her, isn't she? aww, poor thing...” “ooh, are you cumming, baby? cumming in your sleep like a slutty little girl while I fuck your thighs, so precious…”

✧ g. suguru ; suguru's hands move up and down your soft curves while he grinds against your thighs, quiet, sticky noises sounding in the room. you're so adorable, he wants to shake you awake but teasing you with his thick cock nudging against your clit is so much more fun

“you’ve always been so responsive, i didn’t think my dick between your thighs would get you like this, princess.” “oh? was that my name? don’t tell me you’re having a wet dream about me. so dirty, baby, thinking of me like that while sleeping when I’m right here with you.” “don’t you wanna wake up and move my cock somewhere other than your thighs? c'mon, princess, wake up for me.”

who does it because they are desperate ↴

✧ k. choso ; not outright fucking you is painful, but he doesn’t want to wake you up. He’s so fucking hard, that dream affected him more than he thought, and before he knew it, he was fucking your thighs, not caring how loud he was being.

“baby, baby, fuck, hoohmygodd, please! need y'so bad, so fuckin' soft, so soft, fuck, could d' this to you all the time, never wanna stop, p-please, god, 'm gonna cum all over you-!” “sticky fuckin' p-pussy's beggin' me t' fuck it, b-but wanna see you look at me. c'mon, c-c'monnn, please wake up, let me stick it in, o-or 'm gonna waste it a-and cum all over your cunt.” “oh, mmh, ’m cumming, ’m cumming, baby, i-i’ll clean y' up after, g'nna fuck you again 'n' again 'n' againnn, fuck, ’m cumming-!”

✧ t. fumihiko ; poor thing, fumihiko honestly tries to deal with it by himself, trying to just jerk off in the bathroom, but it doesn't work. he knew what he needed, he needed you, needed to touch and feel you around him. with shaky hands holding your thighs, he slides his aching cock between your thighs, moaning so cutely…and when you wake up and start cooing to him, he absolutely loses himself.

“i’m-i’m gonna mess you up so bad, been wantin’ to leave you a mess for so long, so fucking long, 'm g-gonna cum all over your pretty thighs. 's okay, right? right? mmh, okay, 'm gonna do it, 'm gonna cum on 'em.” “y-yeah, yeah, fuck, your thighs are so soft, feel so good around my cock, gonna cum all over them, m-ma'am.” “'s so much cum, i can’t stop cumming, m-mommy, ’m losing my mind, love your thighs, they're so soft, s' soft, thank you, thank you, thank you-!”

who wakes you up ↴

✧ f. toji ; it’s not uncommon for toji to wake up in the middle of the night, cock hard in his sweats. can you blame the guy when he's sleeping next to the sexiest woman he's ever laid his eyes on. he thanks whatever god there is for giving him a wife like you who lets him fuck your soft thighs until you wake up up so he can stuff you full of cum instead of wasting it on your stomach.

“’s time to wake up, mama, don’ ya wan' me t' fuck your needy cunt 'stead of these pretty thighs?” “aw, y'look soooo cute and dumb right now…my pretty thing. c'mon, spread those legs for me, mama, toji's gonna take care of ya.” “did y' dream 'bout me fucking your thighs? yeah? mm, you’re takin' my cock like you wanted me t' fuck you awake…hm? you want that next time? mm, i’ll keep it in mind, baby girl, now shut up and let me fuck you dumb.”

✧ n. kento ; he usually only does this when he’s very very frustrated from working, coming home to see his pretty baby in one of his button-ups sleeping, thighs out in the open. he can’t help himself, softly calling your name as he slides his hard cock slowly in and out between your thighs, giving you soft smile when you wake up.

“sorry to wake you, darling, I know it’s late, but I need you. you just...look so beautiful, i couldn't help himself.” “you were responding so cutely in your sleep…would you rather I be inside you? ask nicely, honey, and I’ll give you what you want. you know a good husband does whatever his wife asks.” “so, so pretty like this, i could fuck you for days. should i do that, my sweet girl? mm, maybe i should take tomorrow off and keep you in bed all take, make sure that my seed takes. what do you think, sweetheart, you want me to give you a baby?”

all rights reserved © lxnarphase | do not repost, copy, translate, or alter my work

[miyukisu]

NSFW Alphabet | Sae Itoshi .ᐟ

❤︎ | Get to know Sae Itoshi from A to Z~ ╰ feat. sae itoshi x afab! reader

minors do not interact

[A] Aftercare Decent. Bare minimum. Not over the top. At the very least he would wipe you down and clean you up without expecting you to move an inch. He'll even guide you to the bathroom if you plan to shower together (there are times when he carries you, but that's reserved for days when he REALLY goes all out on you). You have to specifically request for things if you want him to do it. Otherwise, that's all you're getting.

[B] Body Part Sae's canonically into ass. But it's important to note that he cares more about shape rather than size. He'll subtly ogle at your ass even in broad daylight, especially if you're wearing tight clothes that showcase it. On himself, however, he's aware of how nice his thighs look. Sometimes he'll pass by a full-length body mirror in just his boxers and he'll stand there for a minute to admire his legs. Partially, this is why he enjoys working out his legs.

[C] Cum Cums a lot, but not thick. It's more on the translucent side. He maintains a healthy diet so you can expect the taste to be bearable. Of course, he likes to release on your ass, but sometimes it gets on to your back as well. It's a sight he never gets tired of.

[D] Dirty Secret Even with his partner, he would hate to admit that he likes taking nude pictures of himself. It's not like he's going to send them out or that he gets off to it; he's no narcissist. But there's just something inexplicable about doing it. He'll snap a few, look at them, then delete them. He isn't sure why. But if you're into receiving nudes, he'll gladly comply (that is, if you've been together long enough).

[E] Experience Despite his good looks, it's surprising to know that he hasn't done it with a lot of people. He only does it with someone he's in a relationship with and even that rarely happens. He's a busy person and it takes longer for him to develop trust for anyone compared to the normal person. But you could say that he's a natural. He can make you cum at least a couple of times through instinct alone.

[F] Favorite Position He has a hard time picking between plain ol' doggy and reverse cowgirl. See any similarities? Yeah, both positions just give him a nice view of your behind. It allows him to grope, squeeze, and slap it any time he wants. He particularly likes watching it jiggle at every hard thrust that he does. Although, he might prefer doggy a little more as he can have most of the control in that position. But it's trivial to pick. He'll just have you in both positions each time you decide to do it anyway.

[G] Goofy The man doesn't smile, let alone laugh, during sex. It's not that he's not enjoying it, but he doesn't find the act to be humorous at all. He finds it weird to call it "fun". He'd rather describe it as passionate and intense which is why he's serious. However, there are VERY rare moments when he cracks a small smile, but it only happens in highly emotional moments (like your first time having sex as a married couple, for example).

[H] Hair He trims it, but not for sexual purposes. He's an extremely hygienic man, so he does it out of self-care. In reality, he doesn't care too much about what their partner thinks of his hair. If they like it; then great. If they don't; they can deal with it. Besides, he doesn't care about his partner's hair. He'll take whatever's waiting for him down there. He'll never go fully bald because he finds it odd. He'll trim it a bit regularly and that's about it.

[I] Intimacy A very passionate lover; that's for sure. As I've mentioned, he finds the act to be something serious. He'll only do it with you out of love and care. So even if he doesn't outwardly seem like a romantic person in bed, he definitely is. He likes to keep it fair in the bedroom. So if he's enjoying, you should be enjoying it just as much as he is. Although, he doesn't speak much, but he'll call you "Amor" sometimes. Sae will whisper that name in your ear gently.

[J] Jack Off As you might expect, he doesn't do it a lot. For one, he's too busy doing or thinking about something else. It's something that he can only think about doing when he's lying in bed at night with a blank mind. Sae mostly does it out of frustration—if he wants to release pent up emotions without lashing out on someone else. He's quick and likes to get the job done as fast as he can. Can you blame him? It relaxes him after all. Though, he isn't immune to temptation either. If you send him jack off material, he'll gladly use it.

[K] Kink Sae discovered it a bit late, but he likes brat taming. He doesn't even know that it's a thing. He just knows that he likes putting disobedient girls in their places. He'll act annoyed or pissed off at your insolence, but deep down, he's craving that you do it more. Something about feeling that his authority is being challenged, excites him. Of course, it adds some spice to your bedroom activities. But maybe it has to do with him proving to you over and over again that he's the one in control—he's the one holding the reigns. He especially loves it when you eventually become obedient in the end. But keep being a tease; he eats it up.

[L] Location Anywhere as long as it's inside the house/apartment/hotel. He likes the privacy and comfort that those places offer. He can't be bothered to think about the possibility of getting caught. As thrilling as it might be, he has a reputation to uphold. The impending PR work is not worth the orgasm, at least for him. He also would hate to do it in a place that would force you into a weird position. At least at home there's a bed, a couch, a chair, or a counter for you to use. Again, he's a hygienic guy, so the dirty outdoors is a huge no for him.

[M] Motivation First of all, he has to be either extremely relaxed or incredibly frustrated—there is no in between. But once either condition is met, it's not that hard to get him in the mood. In fact, he likes to hear how eager you are. Simply asking him if he wants to do it would be more than enough. Even better if you express how much you've been needing him throughout the day or week. There are times when he initiates things, but that usually happens when you're already touching each other (like while cuddling). You'll know because he'll grind his hard on against you or deliberately take your hand and place it there.

[N] No Anything extreme is off the table for him. In many ways, he's quite vanilla. The farthest he'll go would be a little bit of bondage and usage of toys. But if there's extreme pain, blood, piss, and things beyond that involved—consider him out.

[O] Oral Again, he likes to keep things pretty equal, so likes both giving and receiving. Although, you might notice that he'll go at your pussy first before letting you suck him off. It gets him into the momentum apparently. Plus, most of the time, he already gets you to cum from his tongue alone. You swear that he gets better each time he does it. You can never last long since he likes to suck on the clit, oop. When you suck him off, he'll tangle his fingers in your hair and guide you lightly. He lets you do your thing, pretty much. The only exception is when he's really stressed out—expect him to tug at your hair a little harder then.

[P] Pace He usually likes it slow and sensual. Sex is the only time he feels relaxed and in control of his time. Why would he want to rush it? The atmosphere also feels different for him when he goes slow. Furthermore, Sae uses this as a way to observe you properly—which spots to hit, which points to stimulate at the same time, and so on. It gets him off knowing that he can get better and better at providing pleasure. Consider it as part of his ego as well. He might take it slow, but there are definitely moments when he pounds you hard and steady. The type of pounding that needs you to hold on for dear life or else you'll fall.

[Q] Quickie Not really a fan of it. But it's not like he would never do it. Sae will only resort to quickies when absolutely necessary. Those kinds of situations are mostly when both of your schedules are packed and there is literally not enough time to have proper sex. That or when both of you feel incredibly frustrated and nothing else will satiate you but each other. Another reason why he doesn't do this as much is that it leaves him wanting more. He hates feeling like a needy idiot, so he avoids quickies as much as he can.

[R] Risk He'll try anything not-so-extreme at least once, especially if you ask him nicely. Though he has shown interest in experimenting in bondage a bit, more specifically, in shibari. It's a bit intricate and it might hurt you a bit if not done right, but if you're willing to share that risk with him—he's game. From the Sae perspective, I'd say a risky thing that he does is whispering things in your ear he wouldn't normally say. He just likes to keep you on your toes and the way you clench down on him is just way too good. Besides, you'll most likely forget he said it anyway because he fucks you dumb most of the time.

[S] Stamina His endurance and stamina in general are certainly well-trained, but he is just a man. His dick needs to recuperate at its own pace. Maybe he can last two rounds for the most part, but there are days when he can only last for one. But it's not much of an issue. In that one round, he can last for so long. He can take advantage of that time and make you cum over and over again. Besides, even if you've milked him for the time being, he can still go at it with his mouth and fingers. You'll never catch him breathless after a few measly minutes.

[T] Toys He doesn't own any. He feels silly spending money on such things and using it on himself. But if it's for you; he'll gladly spend as much as he needs. He just doesn't see the appeal of using it on himself. Pocket pussies? Cock rings? Seems a bit ridiculous to him. But if you happen to own a vibe or two, he'll definitely use it. There's no harm in heightening your pleasure anyway. He's also chill with a bit of bondage rope and handcuffs. He's a bit iffy about using dildos though. Maybe it's because of his pride, but what's the use of it when you can have his dick instead?

[U] Unfair He's a tease without even trying. The snarky remarks that he makes comes out of his mouth naturally. "Oh, you're cumming again? You're too easy," and he'll say it with a straight face. Sometimes when you do ask him to fuck you faster, he'll ignore you on purpose. The man wants to hear you beg so nicely for him after being such a brat earlier. Although, he's surprisingly less of a tease as you'd expect.

[V] Volume Mostly grunts and groans. He claims that you will never hear him whimper, so of course, you make it your life's purpose to get him to whimper. It has yet to happen. And he does find it amusing that you think that you can make THE Sae Itoshi whimper like a bitch. Aside from that, the sounds he makes aren't so loud. He makes sure the grunts near your ear, containing it there. BUT, a little quirk of his is that he lets out a long sigh once he cums. It just feels so relieving that he can't help it anymore.

[W] Wild Card He thinks he'd bust right away sometimes whenever you stare up at him while you suck him off. Seeing you servicing him so eagerly while on your knees does things to his brain. It makes his ego swell like insane. "You're such a good girl, amor. You love me alot, don't you?" He'll wipe away the tears that threaten to fall because your jaw's so stretched out. Sae knows you're struggling a bit, but hang on for now and he'll reward you plenty afterwards.

[X] X-ray Not that girthy, but loooooong. He has quite a pretty dick, especially since he keeps it neat down there as well. It doesn't curve that much, but it is quite veiny. You can see the veins because of his pale complexion. There's one particularly thick vein that feels the best when rubbing against your walls. He's also cut, so you know that he has a light pink tip. Definitely a shower.

[Y] Yearning He's definitely more inclined to have sex than jacking off. That's because he'll actually make time for it. Sae will find ways to clear up his schedule or at least have more time with you—to have sex and to do things other than sex, of course. It's an odd, but helpful, trait of his that he can easily match the libido of his partner. Unless if his partner has an insanely high libido, then you'd probably have to find even ground. But again, it's not hard to get him into the mood. So if you initiate or ask him, more often than not—he'll get down and dirty with you in a heartbeat.

[Z] Zzz He doesn't fall asleep right away because, A) he needs to clean up and take care of you, and B) he just isn't tired enough. Don't get him wrong—good pussy pushes him to the edge, but being well-trained just helps him to not pass out immediately after busting. However, he will fall asleep right away once you're all cleaned up and the bed (which presumably got drenched) is all tidied up. Once you're sleeping soundly in his arms, he'll let himself be consumed by slumber as well.

❤︎ Overall: Sae's quite a good lover in that he puts effort and meaning into sex and that he's constantly improving. He genuinely cares about making it an activity both of you enjoy. 10/10 experience.

©kzyluvr do not repost/reupload/translate any of my works on other platforms

╰ author's note Actually a bit terrified that I might have butchered Sae Itoshi in this one

[20-th-centurygirl]

nsfw alphabet

jude bellingham x reader

masterlist navigation

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

king of aftercare idc what anyone says. i think he loves showering with you in general bc it's soo intimate to him so he's always showering with you and helping you wash your hair :( he's also super touchy at the best of times but especially after sex he literally cannot take his hands off you.

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

cannot decide if he's an ass or boobs man i think he's abit of both tbh. he loves resting his hands on your waist literally all the time. loves your thighs! always has a hand resting on your thigh when you're sitting down and loves leaving little bite marks and hickies on them 🤭 i also think he loves a lil belly pouch? idk how to explain it but i just think he absolutely adores a girl with curves.

on him i think his arms or thighs. he goes feral when he catches you staring at his biceps and always flexes them cause he knows it has you drooling. loves his thighs cause he knows how much you love riding them 😁😁

c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

loves finishing in you. it just feels so intimate to him that you both trust eachother enough and it makes him feel so much closer to you.also loves finishing on your boobs or stomach then scooping his cum up with his fingers and making you lick it off 😋😋

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he loves middle of the night sex. it's always so much more intense and intimate and jude's always a little whinier

i also feel like he secretly wants you to take control but is too worried to ask. he's so dominant in every aspect of his life and i think sometimes he just wants his girl to take care of him :(

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

he knows what he's doing but i also don't think he's super experienced? he doesn't seem the type to have loads of one night stands tbh. he's experienced but it still took him some time to figure out what was good for you

f = favorite position (this goes without saying)

he's a man so ofc he loves abit of doggy but i also think he loves missionary. as basic as it is, it makes him feel closer to you and makes the whole experience more intimate for him. he's also not gonna say no to having you on top 🤭

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

honestly i think it depends. sometimes neither of you can stop giggling for no actual reason? one of you will let out a moan then both of you just burst out laughing.

but i think he's also super serious at times because he's always so busy and he wants to make the most out of time with his girl. he wants to savour every moment with you so stays super serious.

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

i think he keeps everything neat but not nare

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

so so intimate! i think he has a filthy mouth but he can't for the life of him be any level of degrading because he feels mean (he doesn't give a fuck about how mean he is when he's teasing though 🤭) so his comments are more praise.

i think he secretly loves that super cheesy romantic music rose petals and candles sex more than he'd ever admit. he doesn't get to spend alot of time with you so when he has you all to himself and a chance to show you just how much you mean to him you best believe he's gonna take it.

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)

loves facetiming you to get himself off when you're away. he doesn't usually do it at home bc you're there. but the real magic is mutual masturbation bc i think he's super into that 🤭🤭 (@judeswhore 's blurb on this is 10/10 btw) loves having you next to him with one leg over his touching himself. there's just something about it that sends him into overdrive.

k = kink (one or more of their kinks)

praise kink!! giving and receiving jude loveeesss praise. constantly telling you that you're his good girl and how well you're doing 🫠 but he also loves receiving praise. goes feral when you call him your good boy. will literally beg you to tell him how good he feels when he's fucking you

also has a raging size kink. he's massive and loves how small you look compared to him. has a thing for fucking you infront of a mirror so he gets to see the size difference between you both.

i also think he loves a risk. he is literally up for fucking you whenever wherever even if there's a chance of you being caught. i'm talking having a quickie in your childhood bedroom while your parents/siblings are literally downstairs. tells you to be a good girl and stay quiet or he'll stop. sometimes makes you suck on his fingers so you stay quiet 🤭

l = location (favorite places to do the do)

i think he loves your bedroom the most. as basic as it is, there's no interruptions and he can completely focus on you. however he does love to tease you in public just to hear you beg him to take you home so he can finish what he started.

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

anything. literally something as simple as you putting on lip gloss or wearing something tight has his going wild.

n= no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

anything that's gonna hurt you. i don't think he'd be into super degrading talk. like maybe a little bit but nothing too far.

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

i think he's 50/50. he loves to tease you and he knows he can do that when he's going down on you.

but i think he has a super sensitive dick 🙂 like the moment you have him in your mouth he's trying desperately not to just fall apart and cum instantly.

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

also depends. after a bad game (him and refs never get along) he's super fast and rough but super clingy and affectionate after. but otherwise he's super slow and romantic and loves taking his time with you. sometimes you literally have to beg him to be rougher with you 🤭

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

loves a quickie before he goes to training! he'll literally bend you over the kitchen worktops and make your head spin then kiss your neck, give you this really cocky smirk and tell you to be good and he'll do a proper job when he gets home.

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

yes yes yes! he's always down to try new things bc he wants to make sure you're having the best sex of your life. i think he's into risks bc he loves the thrill but he doesn't really take any public risks because the chance of you being caught is super high and he doesn't want to cause you any embarrassment

s= stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

he runs around for 90 mins, he's got good stamina and you're usually warn out way before him " c'mon baby. you gonna be a good girl and give me one more?"

t= toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

loves using them 🤭 i genuinely think he loves buying new ones he sees to try them out on both of you and you sometimes get new ones that you see too 🤭 just for a second imagine using a vibrator on him.

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

biggest tease ever. he loveeess to drag everything out and mocks you a little bit when you get overstimulated 🤭

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

loud. he's not afraid to let you know how good you're making him feel by moaning, whining, whimpering and all that 😋

w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

loves loves loves lingerie. like seeing you in pretty little matching sets literally drives him insane. he loves surprising you with new really expensive sets ( i'm talking agent provocateur stuff). he buys you some when he's away on international break and asks you to model them for him which always ends in the best phone sex ever

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

we've seen enough evidence, he's massive 🤭

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

the man is literally never satisfied. he's so completely obsessed with you and he just can't ever get enough.

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

he won't fall asleep until he knows you're 1000% okay and comfortable. once he knows you're doing okay and relaxed then he can sleep.

[dark-and-kawaii]

You can pick who but I'm begging for more smut from you. Zevlor Rolan Haarlep Raphael whoever I just need it. Call me thirsty I don't care.

Shameless Smut

Haarlep x f!Tav/Reader - Zevlor x f!Tav/Reader - Raphael xf!Tav/Reader - Rolan x f!Tav/Reader - Dammon x f!Tav/Reader

⋆˙⟡♡ Notes: I- I picked everyone and added Dammon because i'm horny and unhinged like that... AND BE THIRSTY WE LOVE A THIRSTY HOOMAN!!!

⋆˙⟡♡ NSFW | Haarlep Is The Best | Big Dick Zevy | Creampie | Dirty Talk | Breeding | Pregnancy | Choking | Tail Play | Public Sex | Lorroakan Is A Perv | Dammon Chokes You With His Tail | I Missed Stuff But Oh Well

Enjoy xoxo

Haarlep

“What would the city think, their precious little hero-“ Haarlep thrusted the rest of their cock inside you, “filled with an incubus���s seed.” They continue to ravish your cunt, stretching and filling you so well, you could only pant as you clenched the sheets.

“How would they react-“ Haarlep bent down, their teeth grazing against the back of your neck, their hand caressing your still flat tummy, “seeing their savior swollen with a demon’s child~” The incubus bit down gently, but enough to mark you, a dark red hickey blooming where their lips met your skin. You groaned, tightening up on their cock, the thought of bearing an incubus’s child, bearing a demon child, was strangely arousing.

Haarlep growled at the feeling of you squeezing down on them, and continued pounding into you, their hand tangling in your hair to press your face against the mattress, your ass high in the air. You let out a muffled moan as Haarlep ravished you, the head of their cock hitting that spongy spot inside you every time, and their tail rubbing your clit with a speed and skill that rivaled your own hand. You felt the knot in your stomach tighten and coil, your moans turning into desperate mewls.

“s’too- too much! I-I can’t- AH~!!”

Haarlep’s hand wraps around your throat as they slam into your sopping pussy, the bed creaking, “So pretty with my hand around your delicate little neck-“ headboard slamming into the wall and you just have to hang onto the sheets like your life depends on it.

"Do I scare you?" The incubus purred, letting the hand squishing your neck tighten around it, "Do I terrify you? You know what I am and what I can do." Their voice was low and their breathing harsh.

Haarlep’s breathing picked back up when you nodded- their hip knocking against you painfully when your hand came up and sealed around their wrist, pressing down. Wanting them to do it, to press harder, to push you around more and more, shamed in how good the feel of their hand squeezing your throat made you feel."Y-Yes! Y-you- nngh- a-ah~!” you gasped, "B-but you- f’m-make me f-feel- n-nngh- s’good- AH~!"

You were a mess beneath them, panting and moaning like a bitch in heat, the feeling of them filling you up making you see stars, “gu-gunna fill m-me~” you babbled, eyes rolling back. Haarlep chuckled darkly, their thrusts becoming sloppy.

"Pump you full- fill your womb with my seed- fill you till you're leaking-" Haarlep grinned against your flesh, "-until the hero’s stomach swells with my child- I'll make you a mother, a breeder for my little demons." They mutter, the tip of their tail flicking your clit just right, your thighs trembling and your vision whiting out.

"F-Fuck! Haarlep~!!" Your orgasm slammed into you, making you scream.

“Good! Cum- cum with me, little mortal-!"

"S'gonna- I-I-!! G-Gods, please!~" You sobbed your body going numb. Haarlep always teeters on losing themself at this part, always brought back though to reality by your nails digging into their wrist, and how sweetly you whimper their name.

"H-Haarlep~” you sob, wanting, needing their cum, "I-I want- I w-wanna b-be a m-mother, w-want you t-to f-fill me- g-give me a c-child~" You were crying now, the way your walls just clamp down around them, pulsing and gushing.

"I'll take such good care of you~" they coo, kissing your tears away as they paint your insides white. Their seed warm and thick, Haarlep pressed themself deeper inside you to push their cum even further. Their tip rubbing against your cervix, the incubus wanting to be sure their sperm finds a home in your womb.

Their goal to make sure the shape of their cock is imprinted into your gummy walls, wanting to ruin you for anyone else. 

Rolan

Rolan grabbed your arms, his face deepening in color as soon as his back hits the scroll shelf. He looked down at you, his lips parted in a slight snarl, his nostrils flaring, "Th-Thish is highly inappropriate-." He tries to protest, but you push forward, your lips meeting his. He stiffens for a moment before he relaxes- almost. Pushing you off of him, Rolan glares at you, his lips firm. "You're insufferable-." He groans, “You need to leave before Lorroakan retur-“.

You stare at the cut on his eyebrow, your eyes trailing to find the bruise on his cheek. The marks his mentor left behind… Your eyes darkened, and you press up against him, your chest rubbing against his.

"I'm not leaving until I know you're alright." You hiss, your eyes softening when you find his stare, your lips pursed, “besides~” You tiptoe your fingers up his chest, tracing over his heart, before finding his neck, then his chin. You lean in, gently pulling him forward. His breath hitching. "I want him to catch us~” You glide your nail against his throat, causing Rolan to swallow thickly, his adam's apple bobbing as his eyes flutter close and he sighs.

"You are… insufferable," he says, his voice a mere whisper. Your lips curl into a smirk as you pull him in for a kiss, pressing your body closer.

“Want him~” you trace his bottom lip with your tongue, nipping him gently, "to catch me~" you whisper, his breath deepening, before his hands find their way around your waist, gripping the fabric of your shirt, “to watch me take you~".

Rolan inhales sharply, his lips parting just enough for your tongue to slip through, the heat of his mouth causing your eyes to flutter closed. He groans, his hand cupping the back of your neck, his tongue brushing against yours. You pull back, a string of saliva connecting the both of you. His mouth following yours before you push him back again, “I want Lorroakan to hear my sweet Rolan’s moans~"

You tug up on his robe, "Want him to hear me cry your name~.” You bite your lip, “To watch you fill my dripping pussy with your delicious cum~" You glance up at Rolan, whose face is completely flushed, his lips parted, and eyes dark, “Wanna bruise his ego~”

"You are going to be the death of me," He spins the two of you, your back to the shelf now. His hips roll forward and you can feel the evidence of his arousal.

"I'll be your death." you whisper, pressing up against him.

Rolan groans, his lips ghosting against your neck, "And what a way to go," he mumbles, his breath hot. He kisses along your neck, his teeth grazing over your pulse. He reaches his hand out, and grabs the shelf above you, knocking a scroll onto the ground, "Lorroakan is going to find us." He warns, “ The man knows everything that happens in this tower."

You moan as he bites your neck, his fingers digging into your skin before pushing you down to the ground. Rolan’s hand forcefully flips your dress up, bunching it at your hips, his other hand reaching to rub the wet spot of your panties, "So wet already."

He pulls down your undergarments, his hand slipping between your slick folds, his thumb finding your clit and rubbing it in slow circles, his middle finger sliding into you, his index finger teasing the edge of your ass, "Such a degenerate," he purrs, his tail flicking behind him.

You moan, rocking your hips, feeling his fingers slide in and out, “Rolan~," you mewl, spreading your legs, your chest pressed into the wooden floor.

"Look at you, getting so wet, so loud." His fingers move faster, the lewd, wet noises filling the tower. You moan, reaching a hand back, grasping his arm. Rolan grunts, "Do you want Lorroakan to find us? Hear me make you a sloppy mess?" He growls, adding another finger, "Do you want him to see how good you're taking my fingers? Hear the noises you make?"

You nod, "Yes!" you mewl, "P-please~, rut into me, Rolan~."

He scoffs, his fingers leaving you, the wetness trickling down your thighs. You feel his cock slide between your slick folds, a low groan leaving his throat, "Such a needy thing," he mumbles, his lips trailing soft kisses along your back, "My needy thing." he growls, his hands wrapping around your waist, his tail coiling around your leg.

He pushes in, a small groan leaving his throat, his hips flush against your ass, his head pressed into your back, "So tight," he groans, his nails digging into your sides, "My beautiful girl."

He starts to move, pulling out until only the tip is left, and then roughly thrusting in. You gasp, pushing back against him, feeling his hips slap against your ass, "R-Rolan~" you moan, clawing the wood beneath you, "M-More~" you whine.

Rolan moves his hands to your breasts, groping and pinching throat the thin fabric of your dress, his thumbs rolling over your nipples, "How lewd of you, getting turned on by the thought of being caught." He teases while he rocks his hips, his tail tightening around your leg. He grunts, his thrusts growing erratic, his nails digging into the tender flesh of your breasts.

Rolan is too focused on you, his rough snaps causing scrolls to fall from the shelf beside you, but as you tilt your head you notice a pair of eyes staring at you, their cock in their hand.

You lock eyes with Lorroakan, who watches silently. The sight of him causes a chill to run up your spine, your back arching as Rolan pulls you up giving Looroakan a perfect view of his cock thrusting into you, your juices coating his cock making a mess on the floor. Rolan doesn't stop, his nails digging into the soft flesh of your breasts, his head buried in the crook of your neck. "Cum for me," He whispers in your ear, his hot breath fanning against your neck, his pace unrelenting, his cock hitting all the right places.

"M' s'so close~," You whine, your eyes never leaving Lorroakan’s, "C-Cumming~" you mewl, closing your eyes. Your body tenses, and the knot in your stomach snaps, your legs twitching as Rolan keeps thrusting, your walls clenching around his cock. Rolan's hips stutter, his thrusts growing sloppy, and a low groan leaves his throat, "D-Damn," he grunts, his cum spilling out, the warmth causing a shudder to run through your body.

You hear Lorroakan groan, his own cum covering his hands. His eyes meet yours, and you bite your lip, your hand reaching behind your to pull Rolan's face to yours. "Kiss me~," and he obliges, his hand slipping between your legs, rubbing your overstimulated clit, "Again?" He chuckles, "Such a dirty girl."

You would keep at it until Lorroakan had to come pull you off Rolan…

Raphael

"Sweet little mouse." Raphael whispers, taking in how fucked out you are beneath him, wheezing out how good he feels. 

"Do you like being pinned down like this, hm?" it's an almost teasing lilt. You think he’s laughing at your stupefied state, but in reality he’s marveling, basking in how good you are to him, greedily accepting his cock.

You nod your head, whimpering. The motion is a pathetic, weak jerk. A few strands of hair fall across your forehead. He takes note of how flushed your cheeks are, how glossy your eyes look.

The sight makes him groan. You feel so good, clenching and spasming around him with each thrust, making him throb and swell.

He has you trapped, completely. Raphael has broken you to the point where all you can do is take his cock, whimpering and crying as he drives it deeper into you, stretching your insides so that they fit his shape and no one else's ever again. Eradicating the memories of those who had been with you prior.

You think to yourself, there’s nothing more delicious than being pressed, pinned down onto his bed, bred like livestock, and barely able to suck in a shaky breath of air between each rough thrust.

The feeling of his cock plunging deep inside, filling you up, stretching you, is addicting. You don't know how many times he’s made you cum, only that it doesn't seem to stop. Unable to focus on anything else besides the cock splitting you open and the pleasure wracking through your body.

"M-more~!!" you wail against the sound of your squelching cunt, feeling his thick cock tug at your walls as he leaves. It’s a frenzy entanglement- you provoke him, spur him on to drive into you faster and harder, the way you wiggle and clench down onto his thick cock, creaming so hard that with each impact you can not only hear it- you feel it splatter down in between the folds of your stretched cunt, drip down the seam of your ass. 

The cambion more than willing to provide. He’ll keep you forever, a beautiful ornament for his bed, his own personal toy to fuck whenever he desires, a perfect suitor to give him children, an army of his own blood, a pretty little thing to keep by his side. 

Zevlor

“Mm~ Zevlor-” warm hands made their way up your thighs. You gasped at the feeling of your underwear being pulled to the side. The cool air nipped at your hot skin. 

"I- I missed you so much, Zevy.”

The tiefling let out a soft hum, "I’ve been quite busy, haven’t I?" his tail brushed against your folds, and your breath hitched.

He chuckled and pressed his thumb on your clit. He began rubbing it in circles and you mewled in delight.

"I apologize," he whispered in your ear.

His lips trailed hot kisses down your arm, his hands wondering over your entire body, pausing at your swollen belly and looking up at you.

You met his gaze with half lidded eyes and smiled, caressing his cheek. His eyes softened and a smile grew on his lips as he continued kissing lower and lower. Situating himself in between your thighs, he hooked your legs over his shoulders, as he buried his face in your pussy.

The heat of his tongue sent a shiver through your spine and a groan escaped your lips. You arched your back off the bed and grabbed his horns.

"Z-Zev~" his thick fingers held your cunt lip apart, his tongue making small circles around your clit before a finger probed at your dripping hole.

"S's~ hahhh~" Zevlor curled his fingers, feeling for the spongy spot that made you arch your back for him, careful not to scape your insides with his nails. Your hips bucked into his face but his other arm held you down and prevented you from moving, “I~ please~ please~! Zevlor! I-“ You blushed, holding your swollen belly, “N-need you~”

Zevlor pulled away from you and you whined at the loss. He looked at you and licked his lips. His horns glistened from the sweat on your hands, his lips and chin shiny from your juices.

He crawled on top of you and kissed your forehead, then your nose, then finally, his lips met yours. You sighed into the kiss, tasting yourself on him, his tongue exploring every corner of your mouth, your tongues dancing. His hand finding the swoll of your stomach where his child grows…

His child.

Zevlor still can’t get over it. The thought of it turns him on and he can feel his own cheek flush with embarrassment. He constantly thinks about how he filled you up so full of his cum it had gotten you pregnant, the sounds of you begging him to impregnate you still lingering. You were so beautiful like this, so plump and soft. He’d never admit it, but if he could, he’d put another child in you this second. 

“Fu~ S’so tigh-tight~~” you squirmed beneath him as he pushed into your sopping cunt. Despite bedding with him countless of times it was always such a stretch. Your toes curled and a long drawn out moan escaped your lips as your hole greedily took in his thick girth.

He let out a guttural groan as he felt your velvety walls envelop him. It had been a few days since the last time you two had sex and your insides hugged him so tightly, so nicely.

He slowly thrusted his hips, relishing in the wet heat of your cunt.

Dammon

"D-Dammon! I-I'm so sorry! I‘ll be a good girl, I swear!" Lying in the hay you struggle against the rope wrung around your wrists, but Dammon easily presses his foot over the both of your bound arms, forcing you to stay still. He kneels down beside you, his lip lower down to your ear, nose inhaling your scent as he talks down to you calmly and quietly, "Keep count.”

You take in a shaky breath before nodding in agreement, fingers balling up into tight fists as you brace yourself for impact. The first strike of his hand comes down hard, stinging the delicate flesh of your exposed bottom. A small yelp leaves your mouth and you instinctively move forward, “Ah~ O-One! Another strike and you cry out louder this time, tears welling up in your eyes, "fu’-Two!"

The next six strikes come in quickly, and by the end of it your tears and mascara paint your face, your lip tint smeared from burying your face against rough hay inside the barn… Your ass marked with his handprints, and Dammon finds himself running a fingertip over the sore flesh, smirking lightly to himself. "So desperate from my cock that you couldn't even control yourself in front of her, could you?"

"Y-Yes-!."

It was true, you always grew envious when Karlach was around, desperate to show her that Dammon belonged to you.

He pulls you up so that you're resting on your knees, your face now level with his crotch. Dammon’s calloused hand grips your jaw tight, forcing his thumb past your lips.

"Are you going to be good for me," he says darkly, and you can't help the whimper that rises when his coarse thumb and nail presses down on your tongue, saliva pooling. He takes his thumb from your mouth with a pop. His hand fishing his cock out of his slacks, "Go on, wrap those pretty lips of yours around me." and you open your mouth wide, tongue lolling out to lap at his cock.

Dammon's cock is impressive in size, thick and veiny with a bulbous head, and the sight of you kneeling before him, tied up, lips stained and eyes puffy from crying has him leaking pre cum.

Dammon's hand that had been gripping your jaw moved to grip a handful of your hair, his tail coiling around the base of your throat, choking you in a way that leaves you moaning around him.

The head of his cock hits the back of your throat, and you choke, eyes welling up with tears as you look up at Dammon who looks back down at you, smirking, "Can't have you forgetting that you’re the only one that belongs to me."

Dammon thrusts his hips forward, pushing his cock further down your throat, "This is mine." He struggles to keep his eyes open, heavy, breathy moans escaping him as you take more of his length, bobbing your head as you twist and slide your tongue around and under his cock, tracing every vein and ridge. 

Each time you take him deeper and farther you ignore the tight pressure on your throat. You're his to use right now, and despite the pain, you'll be his good little throat hole. His hips twitch a little, making your eyes water and throat tighten. Your breathing is heavy, the taste of him on your tongue the only thing you can focus on. Dammon’s tail squeezes your throat, and your moans vibrate around his cock and appendage.

He groans, voice heavy and strained, "So obedient when my cock stretches your throat.” 

It isn’t long until he begins fucking your mouth, pulling out and pushing back in deep, a loud groan escaping him when your nose bumps against his pelvis. The sounds of you choking and gasping for air has him lost in the moment. He can feel the way your throat bulges against his tail every time he thrusts forward.

You gag, saliva dripping down the corners of your mouth, tears and mascara running down your face. And yet you look so beautiful like this. You take everything he gives, your eyes fluttering closed in bliss as you feel your mind begin to cloud.

“Going to fill your stomach with my cum, make sure you never forget what we have, princess." His words come out in a strained growl, the pace of his thrusts growing erratic.

You whine around him and dig your nails into his thigh when he keeps fucking your face, your vision swaying and darkening. “Going t-to.” You can barely hear, trying to push him away by instinct. His hold on your neck and hair is too tight though, his hot cum shooting down your gullet and forcing you to swallow every drop.

Dammon releases you, watching you slump down on the ground while cum and drool leaks from the corners of your mouth, his tail wiping up some of the excess. He kneels down, pulling your limp form against him, holding you tightly against his chest as you take in large gulps of air.

"You are the only one for me, I promise." He swipes a stray hair from your face, “My one and only girl.”

You look up at him with a dazed expression, a smile on your lips as you rest your head on his shoulder. Dammon’s tail curling around you as he plants a soft kiss on the top of your head, a gentle purr emitting from his chest

[r0-boat]

WHB Asmodeus Nsfw Alphabet

This is going to be the most unholy thing I've written aaaa

Cw: feminization Kink, slightly misogynist?? (He thinks he is the ultimate male and anyone That isn't him are underneath him and his to take) , breeding/pregnancy, aphrodisiac, pheromones, Marathon sex, primal Kink, noncon, (honestly I think he should be a trigger warning in itself)

Gn! Mc

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Good males take care of their females; they should cherish their lover's body just as passionately. Since he is the prime partner, he is the king of aftercare.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Yes.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Don't get me wrong, he does like seeing come all over you, but All of his seed must go in you. Whether it be your mouth or your whole body, you had better not waste a single drop. And if any does, he'll just use it as an excuse to fill you up again.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

I don't think it's a secret but... He wants to have and orgy with all the kings and you. Even if they don't let him touch them. He would be just fine to see how they fuck you.

Oh how he dreams of seven of the most powerful demons in hell descending upon you like rabid sex addicted beasts ruining you.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Honey he is the experience...

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Mating press, pressing your body down, forcing you to do nothing else but take him.

With gravity and the wild thrusting of his hips doing all the work as he jackhammers down into you nice and deep, gravity will do all the work for him when he finally explodes deep inside of you.

All that while he holds you tightly his hands giving access to your body, as well as his eyes and nose to take you in.

The two of you will be consumed in each other

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Yes. He knows he looks intimidating, So it's surprising, but instead of taking you right there and then, he wants to talk to you, crack jokes, tease you, and be goofy; he needs to get all that out before he fucks you so hard. You can only respond in moans and screams.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Sometimes. Really depends on his mood.

Sometimes, he does shave, but most of the time, he has a little bit of hair down there as well as a happy line going up to his belly button.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

I think Asmodeus is very intimate with hugs, kisses, cuddling, and rubbing against you.

He will spoil you. he is the romance. If he really wants you, He will make it known.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Asmodeus jacks off before sex, And it's always before sex. He can't help it. He just gets a little excited :). When you're taking your clothes off? He's touching his dick. When he's kissing you? Fucking his hand.

He's touching himself until he's inside you

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He likes everything but he has a few that drives him wild.

Asmodeus loves primal sex, biting, wrestling, growling, fucking doggy, and predator/prey. Demons, Angels, or humans are all animals and slaves to their instincts.

PLAP PLAP PLAP PLAP PLAP PLAP GET PREGNANT GET PREGNANT GET PREGNANT GET PREGNANT GET PREGNANT-.

"But Ro, what if I'm a dude?" Not with him, you're not. He wants you nice and cute for him, a lovely little dress perhaps? Makeup so he could make it run later. Some lovely stocking that hugs your thighs. Why are you so nervous, Child of Solomon? You look so adorable!

He wants to corrupt you and give you kinks that you never thought you would have. Make you drunk on his scent and cock until you're nothing but his mindless little cock slave lover. Wouldn't that be nice? If it were up to him. If it were really up to him. After this silly little war, He would keep you barefoot and pregnant; he's already lost two of his lovers... He will not lose another one.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere everywhere.

However, there is nothing more sexy than taking you in front of an audience That looks at you, hungry for a taste, but they're not allowed to have you until he's done unless permission is given.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Anything could turn him on. You could be with him, his arm around you, and he could start whispering how much he fucking wants you right now. He only gives you warnings and meetings, though. If not, he'll just drag you somewhere else to fuck you. You're not safe.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Nope :) He's a whore your honor

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Mmm, mouths. He likes mouths, inexperienced or not, you'll have you gagging on his cock. Your muffled cries and gags will make him throb.

On the other hand, his mouth tasting your sweet, sweet juices. Eating you out like a starving man, he'll make you cry and scream on his tongue alone.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

He likes slow and sensual, but Asmodeus prefers primal. He wants to bite you on the neck and take you hard and fast. Chasing orgasm after orgasm until you are full and bred, and even then, I don't think he'll stop.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Quickies do not exist to Asmodeus, a concept of a quickie for him lasts for a day.

"You want me to stop being inside you because you have something else more important? What's more important than me???"

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Oh, he experiments. You'll not be doing the same thing twice, that's for sure. Well, except for breeding, just let him fill you up, please, just one more time...

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Literally days, literally days... You will not leave that bed for 3 to 4 business dick appointment days

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Oh yes definitely He has a whole closet full of toys and that's not even his full collection. There's more in the prison!

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Seeing you so small and pitiful, having you whine and beg for his cock fills his ego please do it more.

"Just one more whimper? Come on beg me one more time... Oh darling say my name like that again; I promise I'll be inside you soon just do that again!"

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Loud and proud, grunting, growling, groaning, mewling moaning everything

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Asmodeus has bad bad baby fever.

He misses being a father. Not only that, he also misses filling someone up to the brim, knowing full well that they are claimed. He misses the way breasts swell when they are full with milk. And he misses that swollen tummy when it's filled with his spawn.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Not too big not too small literally perfect, beautiful cock that looks so good it's fake.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Yes.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

No. Man has infinite stamina. Infinite stamina to leave you curled up in his bed he'll smile because he knows no one can be as hungry as he can. He'll kiss you and leave you there as he goes off to do something else or do someone else, lol.

[luvvyouforever]

harvey (sdv) - nsfw alphabet <3

-> there is not nearly enough harvey content on tumblr for my liking. SO two harvey posts in a row, yes i do believe. and i do love reading an sfw/nsfw alphabet so of course i have to provide for our favorite nerdy doctor <3 i also want you to know that as i write this, i imagine harvey as a taller, bigger man. so like he's got some chub on him and he's got broad shoulders. idk idk it's my headcanon.

-> this is nsfw and dirty! like i really tried to get over my reservations about using descriptive language. with that being said, NSFW 18+ MDNI MDNI MDNI MDNI MDNI MDNI MDNI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

harvey is the sweetest, most gentlemanly partner after sex. he makes sure that you get cleaned up, that you protect yourself against any UTIs or other gross things, makes you some coffee or tea, and cuddles with you endlessly. harvey would need some extra reassurance that what he did was good, that you enjoyed it, or that you didn't get hurt. he'd get anxious and worry about it for the rest of the night if you didn't offer him some kind of honest discussion.

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

i think he appreciates his arms and hands! he knows that he has some strength and likes when you can grip on to his biceps in the heat of the moment. knows how to work his hands i mean, come on. he can do minor surgical interventions. if you hold onto his arm while you're walking in town, he'd get all blushy.

as for you, he truthfully loves every part of you. if you ever asked him "what part of me is your favorite?" he would actually stress over it and couldn't answer. however, if you really really wanted him to say, he would choose your eyes. there's nothing better to him than looking at them when he's giving you pleasure. sends him reeling, actually.

c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

i don't think harvey is particularly keen on making a mess, especially of the bed or another surface. he'd try to keep his cum inside of you, or at least contained to an easily wipeable surface (like your face). on the down low though, i truthfully think he'd surprisingly enjoy cumming on your face, mainly around your lips. messy oral? he's done for.

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

meeting dr. harvey in his office for a confidential check-up? hmm. definitely not when you first start dating, but give him some time and you may just find yourself on his desk (never in the actual, sterile field) receiving a little extra attention wink wink nudge nudge

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

he has plenty of knowledge about anatomy, trust me. he never struggles with finding your best spots. however, he struggles with foreplay and building intimacy and dirty talk, etc. he's a nerd! what can i say? tell him what you like, guide him, and help him and he'd be confident in no time. he's a quick learner.

f = favorite position (this goes without saying)

so, i think there are two sides to harvey. he is either incredible slow, passionate, and earnest. this lends itself to something simple like missionary where he can stare into your eyes, kiss you, tell you sweet things, etc. his other side comes out later, when he's gotten more comfortable with you and with himself, and he can get a little rougher or faster or intense. he likes to be able to grip on to you so something like doggy, maybe riding?

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

harvey can't help but be clumsy sometimes. he learns to be able to giggle at himself when his hand misses the bed and he falls. he also can't help but giggle when hair gets caught in your mouth or some other silly thing. however, he likes to keep things intimate and prefers to have a serious moment with you in bed.

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

i don't think he fully shaves, he just doesn't strike me as that kinda guy with his mustache. but i do think he trims it, kinda manscapes it a little bit to tame everything down but he likes to have a little hair down there.

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

loves making sex romantic. he doesn't do it often, but on special days like your anniversary or birthday, he will harvest some flowers from the farm and throw the petals around the room, open up some freshly made wine, and showers you in affection. as for every day sex, he still likes to make it special for you and never backs down on his pure, teeth-hurting sweetness.

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)

i think that he is the kinda guy that starts feeling guilty for masturbating after he gets into a relationship. prefers to just wait for you. however, before your relationship, he would masturbate every once in a while when he was stressed or horny. if he ever watched porn, which i feel like would be very rare for him, he wouldn't watch highly produced, fake porn. it would have to be something amateur. (harvey has a secret twitter account)

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

okay so...i think harvey starts out vanilla. when you're getting to know him and for the first few times you have sex, he keeps it simple. mainly out of nervousness. however, i think he's kinkier than we might assume. i think he really enjoys being praised and praising you. i think, too, he likes feeling big and strong in that he gives in to his possessiveness sometimes, and he likes being able to manhandle you a little bit. also, i propose this everyone....bondage? nothing super strong! just with his tie or belt. and your hands. to the headboard.

l = location (favorite places to do the do)

your bedroom, mostly! he has a reputation that he needs to uphold so anything in public is nerve wracking. but with some convincing, like i said, his fancy office is not totally off limits.

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

seeing you do anything! especially if you're really determined to get something done and you're working hard at it! like, you've been working so damn hard on renovating and cleaning the farm and you come back proud of everything you've done, he will look at you with a glow in his face. kisses on the neck, too!

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

i don't think he'd ever hurt you. it's just not something he could ever see himself doing. he doesn't mind seeing like fingertip marks on you the day after but anything like choking, spanking, etc is out of the question. he also would find rudeness a turn off in a person. like he would hate to see anyone be rude to another person and it would take away from someone's attractiveness immediately! (that's not to say that he doesn't enjoy some town gossip here and there)

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

my first headcanon here is that harvey LOVES giving oral and on the days when he hasn't cleanly shaved his face, his stubble leaves marks around your thighs. okay, now that that's out of the way: harvey is such a pleaser and he'd do anything to make sure you feel good. he likes when you guide his head, mouth, or hands and he likes being told if you want more, or faster, or less. as for him receiving, i think he enjoys it but he gets so in his head that he can't really cum from it. it takes some extra praise and reassurance to get him to fully open up.

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

like every other answer here, it depends on his mood! he can get really fast when he's feeling extra needy or kinky. however, when he's trying to be romantic, he will take his sweet time and go nice and slow with his thrusts, movements, touches. however, i think he could also use slowness to his advantage and tease you.

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

prefers to take his time but sometimes he likes to catch you before you wake up and start working on the farm and before he has to go to work. he enjoys these more than he will admit to himself though and he thinks it can be fun!!

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

he's down to try new things, don't get me wrong! if you wanna try something new, he'll let you to an extent but he won't do anything that comes with a dangerous outcome or health risk! like, sure, he might be down to try some new rope positions but he won't dare put chocolate sauce around his genitals. do you know the bacteria risks that can come with that??

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

i don't think he has very high stamina. it's not that he gets really sleepy after, but he can't go for multiple rounds. maybe two if it's been a long time since he's seen you. he can last a while though, i think. he won't cum the minute he engages in anything and with his anxiety, it may even take him a while to get to that point.

t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he doesn't mind bringing out a vibrator because he knows how good it could make you feel. he doesn't like them on himself though! he doesn't mind taking a trip out to zuzu and hitting up a sex shop to buy some new bondage-y toys. they will be thoroughly cleaned though. why would nipple clamps be any less clean than forceps?

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

he doesn't do it with malice in his heart, trust me. he just likes seeing you on edge, waiting for him of all people, begging for more pleasure. he experiments to see how long you can go for, or how far he can drag out oral. he definitely enjoys it more than he'd let on. oh, and, i leave you with this, imagine harvey offering fake pity and cooing at you:

"my poor flower...you must want it so bad!"

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

keeps quiet, mostly. some interjections of grunts and groans, especially when he cums. he uses his voice more for sweet talk! he loves hearing your noises, though, and it gives him more encouragement than anything.

w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

the first time you called him dr. harvey in a joking, yet somewhat flirtatious manner, he blushed and got incredibly flustered. then, you did it again, and it had the same effect. and then...oh lord. your hands were roaming his body and you, just testing the waters, called him dr. harvey and he could have finished right there.

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

he's big guys, i'm sorry. nerdy white men are always packing. i headcanon him as a big boy and it's only fitting that he's proportionate. more thickness than length. he was a little ashamed the first time you had sex but he realized just how good it feels and it makes him proud. big dick energy if you will.

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

i think he has a fluctuating sex drive. during flu and cold season, he is so stressed and likes to come back and make dinner, cuddle, and go to bed. however, during the summer, when everyone is healthy and only needs some aloe vera gel for sunburns, he could go day after day with you. it just all depends on his mood and the time of the year.

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

he enjoys cuddling and talking after sex but give him an hour and the man is CONKED. he's the older bachelor so of course he's a sleepy man. cuddle up to his chest, open up the window to let fresh air or the sounds of rain float in, and he'll be like a baby.

[gentlemanjuniper]

If I could inject just a little positivity to the news...

Season 2 has a lot of filler and stretches out a pretty simple mystery to six episodes. That's the appeal to some, I get it. But tightness and focus was not its strong suit. I remember feeling like it wasted a ton of time on side characters and it's possible shaving the story down to 90 minutes will skim things down to its most essential beats and be stronger for it. Basically, S2 got a lot of time given to it, and this is obviously my personal opinion but I don't think it used all of it well. I think S2 itself could have been half the length simply by employing more efficient storytelling and we'd not mourn too much.

A lot of S2's weaker plotlines feel built around people that Neil wanted to work with again, with so many recurring actors (I'm thinking of the zombies specifically, when that minisode could have easily been tighter without them). A lot of s2 to me feels like Neil just making work for the people he likes and wants to work with and a movie has to be more accountable to things like that.

Lots of entire fandoms exist around single movies. 90 minutes is not nothing. It's enough for many, many films to tell a complete story with cute character interactions and satisfying emotional arcs, especially when A&C are the only real significant connecting threads between both seasons thus far.

I don't think there are as many loose threads that absolutely need resolving as people may be thinking. Would I like to know why Aziraphale did the '40s apology dance? Would I like to see his bookshop gun? Sure. Are either of those necessarily essential to closing out the story? I don't think so. Really, what needs resolving is the second coming and, directly connected to that, Aziraphale and Crowley's rift. To me, not knowing the story obviously, that seems super reasonable to do in 90 minutes?

I don't think anyone involved in the final season can possibly be blind to the appeal of the show being Aziraphale and Crowley over anything else. That's certainly the reason why their roles were expanded to begin with from the book and why the second season was, nominally, all about them. They also now have to pay MS and DT for appearing in a movie rather than an ensemble show, there's no way they won't be front and center. Amazon wants a show that will make money and market itself; there's a reason why all the promo material for S2 was of Crowley and Aziraphale, because people engage with that stuff, reblog it, make art that promotes the show, etc. It makes no artistic or financial sense to make a movie that sidelines them.

GO is at its best when it has Terry's voice most strongly in it. That's why to me, S2 was a weaker, more meandering season overall (that, and I think the minisodes, while fun, just make the season feel comprised of different voices not always working in tandem towards a common goal). If I was a writer hired to condense a season into a film, and one of the authors had been rightfully disgraced, I would go out of my way to ensure the clearly Terry stuff is most significantly emphasized. It's telling to me that the Pratchett estate is producing and it's possible that the end result will result in more Terry, less Neil.

Think of it this way: everything we've gotten after S1 has always been extra. Imagine telling a fan of the book in the 90s that not only will you get a six episode adaptation, you also get a totally new second season, AND a movie?

Basically: I know this is disappointing but I think a lot of the pleasure of the Good Omens fandom was ALWAYS people picking up on and expanding on details, and y'all managed to do that just fine when A&C were only ensemble members in S1. You can and will do that with a movie too. And this solution both a) ensures first and foremost that Neil won't be involved or the allegations swept under the rug, and b) gives an opportunity for the heart of the story to be emphasized with greater focus, clarity and less filler.

Will we lose good stuff? Probably. But it's also possible we will get a tighter, more condensed, focused version of the best bits, the Terry Pratchett-est bits. I can easily see a 90 minute movie that, knowing they HAVE to focus on the important stuff now, is more Crowley and Aziraphale centric than ever.

[keyotosprompts]

in between ᯓ★

jealousy prompts (oooooo)

⇴ person a sees person b absolutely hit it off with person c (and is very obviously pained because of it). person b comes over to talk to person a, but is only met with awkward conversation instead of the same boisterous talks they usually have.

⇴ person b sees person a with another person, and they have to bite down on their lip so hard whenever person a talks about the other person, because deep down person b wishes that a was with them (this was more pining than jealousy but oh well).

⇴ "was that a good conversation?" "oh... yeah. it was great" "great." [and there's this thick, awkward silence afterwards].

⇴ person a wishes that they could be person b. person b has it all: charisma, hilariousness, the friends, the partner, etc. (but maybe person a isn't jealous of person b... maybe person a is desperately craving person b's attention and that's why they're jealous)

⇴ person b is watching person a from afar, chatting it up with this other person. b has a strong urge to pull a away from everyone and pull a into b's own little world, but refuses because they want to keep a happy, even if it's at a cost at b's own happiness.

⇴ person a and person b are dating, and person a just finished a conversation with someone person b was jealous of. when they get home, person b is a bit more clingier and so much more touchy. cue a's teasing and b hiding their face in the crook of a's neck.

⇴ ^ "so... are you finally gonna admit you were jealous?" "uh, no, because i wasn't" (b says as they press kisses to a's neck and hold a close to their body).

⇴ "you guys look good together." "really?" (and a/b wants to shout NO!!!!!!)

⇴ "and i love you. i love it when you do the double-tuck thing with your hair when you're nervous, does [person c] notice that? do they know that when you shove your hands in your pockets, you're really just doing it so you can fidget without anyone knowing? or, what about the way you look at people–" and person a is in total shock the whole time.

⇴ "i can't take it anymore. i want–need you. i don't care about what [person c] thinks, i only care about you. tell me you need me too, and i'll stay."

⇴ person b is sulking after seeing person a reunite with someone they've been close to since forever (think family friend...yikes). person a thinks it's adorable and goes to "comfort" b by peppering their face with kisses and giving them words of affirmation.

⇴ "hey" kiss on the jaw "you don't have anything to worry about" kiss on the corner of the lips "i chose you for a reason" kiss on the temple "you're the one i love" kiss on the lips.

⇴ ^^ cut to person b being like "really?" with a cheeky grin.

⇴ person a is about to reach out to person b, only to see person b walk past them to go see person c. person a turns around to person c and immediately feels flooded with comparisons. specifically, "why don't they like me like they like them?"

⇴ person a is constantly checking the relationship status of person b, and their heart always aches when they continue to see person c's username in person b's bio.

[judesprincess]

NSFW ALPHABET – Jude Bellingham

note: hii babes, how are you? look, this is my first time posting something like this and English is not my first language so i ask you to be kind and ignore any mistake pls

ps: let me know if you like this, kisses 💋

a = aftercare (how they are after sex)

he would definitely be extremely careful and gentle after sex. constantly asking if he hurt you and checking your body; he knows how rough he can be (especially when he is frustrated), so he is quick to take care of you right after you are done having sex. he cleans you up while kissing you tenderly and repeating how good you felt; he always asks if you have cramps from penetration and if you do, he makes a nice warm compress to put on you. he holds you protectively and cuddles you until you fall asleep.

b = body part (his and his partner's favorite part)

he loves every part of your body, but besides that, I feel like he's the kind of man who likes curves, so I feel like he's obsessed with your ass, like he can't stop slapping and squeezing it... he also loves kissing and biting it and the sight of it all red from his slaps drives him crazy... I bet he would love your hips, he just loves holding them while he pounds you from behind

you see, when we talk about his favorite part of him i think that this man is definitely very proud of what he carries between his legs (those celebrations and demonstrations don't tell me otherwise), he just loves how impressed you are every time you see him naked (no matter how many times you've seen him like that) and how much you fight to take him every time... i bet he also loves his biceps, especially when he catches you staring at them shamelessly

c = cum (anything to do with cum)

he definitely loves cumming inside you. for him, there is nothing better than finishing inside you and seeing his cum dripping out;  he'd never admit it out loud, but you both knew it was primal, he just loved the idea of ​​claiming you like that and he loved even more the way you trusted him to let him do something so intimate

d = dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he secretly wants to try anal sex with you, but he'll never ask you out loud because he doesn't want to pressure you into doing something just to please him

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

let's be honest, that man is a hoe, he's definitely experienced (especially for his age), but i think he had to hold back in the beginning of the relationship to keep up with you, since you weren't experienced (let's ignore the fact that i'm basing this on my lack of experience) and he didn't want to scare you or overwhelm you with the dirty things he wanted to do to you

f = favorite position (this goes without saying)

to me there are two sides to him, one dirty and naughty and the other gentle and caring; so I think there will be nights when he will put you on all fours and fuck you until you beg for mercy and other nights when he will go in the classic mommy and daddy style and make love to you softly and lovingly while whispering in your ear how beautiful and special you are to him.

g = goofy (are they more serious now? are they funny? etc.)

i think he could be the kind of guy who always wants to make you comfortable and easy, so I think he would make a joke or give you a reassuring smile when he sees you are nervous or tense.

however, of course, there are days when he is not in a good mood and maybe he will be more serious and focused.

h = hair (how well-groomed is it? does the carpet match the curtains?)

honestly, he is very clean and hygienic, but I don't think he shaves;  at most, I think he trims it a little (but he's definitely well taken care of)

i = intimacy (how are they at the moment? the romantic aspect)

like I said, for me he has two sides, so it will depend a lot on the occasion and his mood. there will be days when he'll be more naughty and maybe even verbally degrade you, but there will also be days when he'll be soft and nothing but compliments and sweet words will come out of his mouth

i think he likes to set the mood beforehand, even if it's something simple and, even if you say it's old-fashioned, you secretly love how thoughtful he is about it

j =  jack off (masturbation headcanon)

he definitely does this, always thinking about you and your body;  You are far from each other and have no time for FaceTime and Jude can't stop thinking about the nights of sex he had with you and before he can even think, his hand goes up and down his cock firmly, even though he knows that his hand doesn't even compare to anything you were capable of doing to him. Of course, when you are together, he doesn't even consider touching himself, always wanting you instead.

k = kink (one or more of your kinks)

• size kink: jude definitely has a size kink, he loves how different you are physically (in every way), how short and small you are compared to him; countless times you've caught him comparing the size of your hands and smirking at how small your hand is compared to his. let me tell you, that man definitely loves how different you are down there too, he absolutely loves how tight the fit is whenever he enters you

• praisy kink: that man loves to compliment and be complimented; he just loves saying nice things to you and letting you know how great you're doing. he also loves when you compliment him, when you let him know how good he makes you feel or how big he feels or even how gorgeous he is, it drives him crazy

• innocence kink: i might be crazy, but i think he would love the fact that you have no experience or little;  he would simply love the fact that he was your first and had to teach you everything, the idea of ​​molding you to his will would make him dizzy

l = location (favorite places to do the activity)

I think he is a reserved guy and, although he may allow himself to tease you in public sometimes, he always wants to keep his intimate moments away from anyone; the bedroom or any place in his house or yours (as long as they are alone) is perfect for him

m = motivation (what turns them on, keeps them going)

slightly anything; but something about feeling that you need him moves him in an unmatched way and makes him crazy with desire

n = no (something they wouldn't do, turns them off)

definitely nothing that would hurt you; also, i think he would definitely say a big no to sharing you with someone (no matter who it is)

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

that man seems like a spectacular pussy eater and he would definitely make you fall apart with those gorgeous lips

but he definitely loves a good blowjob, he just can't get over the image of your lips wrapped around his cock, he definitely loves to fuck your mouth

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual?)

it all depends on his mood.  if it’s been a bad day or he’s really horny, he’ll definitely fuck you hard and rough (but always making sure the penetration isn’t hurting you), but on those days when things have gone well, he’ll go in slowly and gently, setting a pace

but I feel like no matter what the pace, he’ll always want to go deep, deep inside you so you can feel him completely

q = quickie (his opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

while he loves taking all the time in the world with you, he also loves quickies—anything to feel you around him—and will take you anywhere in the house

r = risk (are they willing to experiment? are they risk-takers? etc.)

he absolutely hates the idea of ​​someone catching you in such an intimate moment;  it would be the death of him to know that someone saw you as vulnerable and exposed as that must be for his eyes only

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go? how long do they last?)

let's be real, have you ever seen the way that man runs for 90 minutes on the field?? you consider yourself a warrior for trying to keep up with his stamina; no matter how intense it was, there he is, dying to have more of you

t = toys (do they have toys? do they use them? on a partner or on themselves?)

i don't think he'd be too interested in that, although he wouldn't bug you for having some (although he would secretly be a little jealous); however, if you begged him, i think he might allow himself to use something like a cock ring

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

that man is a tease for sure, he would definitely tease you by blushing around him or being extremely wet and needy for him or even while you were struggling to get him

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

he's definitely not the kind of guy who's going to be like a dead man while fucking; he'll definitely moan and grunt while mumbling dirty things to you

w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

jude definitely has a "hero syndrome". he loves being your hero, no matter how silly it is; if you can't open a can or something, he's there to fix it quickly. it can be the most trivial thing, he'll want to fix it for you. he just loves the fact that you depend on him in some way – even though he knows it's lame, he can't help but feel that way – he always wants to be the guy who puts a smile on your face and who makes you feel safe and protected

x = x-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

i think we have more than enough content to say that he's huge (and he's definitely thick too);  you are absolutely struggling to take it all in

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

he is literally never satisfied. he always wants more and more of you and you just love how desired he makes you feel

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

he will only fall asleep after you, only after he is sure you are completely comfortable and satisfied.

well, i really hope you enjoyed it and feel free to interact with me anonymously (or not), kisses 💋

[14dayswithyou]

[REDACTED] NSFW Alphabet

🔞 18+ CONTENT! MINORS: DO NOT INTERACT! 🔞 Ren's version can be found here!!

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

[REDACTED] will usually part with a kiss before cleaning you up with a damp cloth or towel — or, if they were a bit rougher than usual, they'll draw you a bath with all your favourite scents instead.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

He will forever be a tummy and thigh guy until my dying breath. [REDACTED] loves the feeling of you in his arms, so they'll often find themselves absentmindedly running their fingers up and down your thighs or just pulling you closer by your stomach and giving a soft squeeze. [REDACTED] might also favour your hands too, since he's a really big hand-holder and palm kisser. I don't think he'd have a favourite body part on himself, though he does subconsciously enjoy it when you compliment his eyes. It boosts their self-esteem and makes them feel attractive for once. (In regards to their real self!!)

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Similar to his Ren counterpart, [REDACTED]'s cum is very thick and tastes somewhat salty. They enjoy the thought of filling you up and watching it slowly ooze out, and if you can manage to pry it out of him, [REDACTED] might even tell you about how it's always been one of his fantasies to have his cum still inside you while you go about your day. They secretly enjoy knowing that a part of him still lingers on you — as nasty as it might sound.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

I already mentioned it in Ren's NSFW alphabet, but he has an entire 4TB harddrive full of photos of you. Most are innocent and harmless, but others are... not so much. [REDACTED] often likes to look at them and fantasise about what it'd be like to help you through those lonely and intimate moments you spend between your sheets.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

[REDACTED] had zero experience prior to sleeping with you, though he does have some idea of what to do. [REDACTED] is much more forward and honest about what he wants (compared to his "Ren"/Haruko persona), so you can expect him to be less timid and shy when he ruts into you for the first time. "Never done this before... 'M glad I get to experience this with you. Can I... put it in now? Or d'you need more time?"

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Anything that involves facing you and entwining your hands. [REDACTED] is big on watching your reactions to see what you like and respond well to.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He's definitely a lot more casual in bed, but I wouldn't call it goofy or anything. He'll go along with any jokes you make, and will even respond with his own if it fits the situation. But other than that, [REDACTED] tends to keep the moment tender and intimate.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

His happy trail is very faint and matches the dark, black hair on his head. [REDACTED] also keeps himself moderately groomed, but if you want him to shave down there, they're happy to oblige.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Extremely intimate. They are always holding your hand, maintaining eye contact, and constantly praising you for how good you feel and how much he adores you. [REDACTED] might not light candles or set the mood with music, but he makes up for it by showering you with love and affection.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Likes to jack off whenever you do, just so he can time his strokes with your own hand. Otherwise, if the need ever arises, they'll simply seek you out and ask if you're in the mood to help him out.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

They have a maaaaassive praise kink (giving, but also... he subconsciously enjoys receiving it as well), biting/marking kink, and breeding kink. I wouldn't say [REDACTED] has an exhibitionism kink or anything — but he is down for anything if you initiate it in public.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

The hood of Teo's car, Leon's bed, Jae's couch, Violet's gaming desk, Elanor's reception counter, Conan's favourite bookshelf, inside the changing rooms of Kiara's boutique, the staircase in Olivia's souvenir shop, during a phone call with Moth— oh, and on Angel's hardwood floor, I guess /silly

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

While they would never force themselves onto you, you could quite literally bat your eyelashes in [REDACTED]'s direction and he'll be rearing to go. Try pulling them in by their belt or sucking on their collarbone if you want to be (carefully) thrown on the nearest flat surface and be fucked within an inch of your life.

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

Threesomes (or more), cuckolding, or anything that physically involves others outside of [REDACTED] and you. Anything that has to do with DDLG/LB or ageplay is also a massive turn-off for them.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He's a biiiiiiig fat service top/pleasure dom at his core, so you know [REDACTED] is all about giving you pleasure. They're more than happy to spend the rest of their days between your thighs, and [REDACTED] could honestly cum hands-free purely from watching you unravel on his tongue. Your pleasure is his pleasure as well.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Typically, it starts out gentle and intimate — but the more [REDACTED] slowly unravels over time, the harder and rougher he'll get. Things like throwing your legs over his shoulder, gently biting your neck, gripping your hips and using you like a personal fleshlight, bucking into you with reckless abandon, etc. Obviously, nothing that would cause noticeable pain — but it's certainly different from how Ren would usually treat you in the bedroom. 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

They don't mind quickies, but [REDACTED] will always prefer to take their time with you and shower you with all the love and affection they have. He doesn't want to rush your pleasure (and he likes to give you more than one orgasm per tryst), which can prove challenging to do if it's just a quickie. With that being said, they're all for being dragged away to a storage closet for some... fun before work!

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Please ask him to go down on you while you're manning the front desk :( He lives for the thrill of it. [REDACTED] is down for almost anything — so long as it doesn't put you at risk.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

At the start of the relationship, they might only last one or two rounds due to their inexperience. But as time progresses, he'll slowly start to get better. But it's soooo hard for [REDACTED] to focus when you're right there in front of him; splayed out perfectly on his bed and letting him bury himself deep inside your warmth, all while you— Aaaaand... Yeah, he's already spent and snoozing.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Prior to sleeping with you for the first time, [REDACTED] owned a vibrator, butt plug and fleshlight, which he would use whenever you'd pleasure yourself on lonely nights. They'd prefer not to use any toys on you as it comes across like you're not satisfied with his own hands, fingers, mouth, and tongue — but you could honestly convince [REDACTED] otherwise if you play your cards right.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He is a complete tease compared to his "Ren"/Haruko counterpart. They will whisper absolute filth into your ear while slipping their hands between your bodies and playing with your sex — before pulling away and innocently asking what you need from him. "D'you want more? Y'gotta tell me, angel." / "That feel good? Tell me where." / "I don't think y'can take all of me, angel. You're practically stuffed full already." / "You're droolin'. Feels that good, huh? Right here?" / "If y'want me to go harder, y'gotta beg a little more. It's cute. You're s'fucking cute." / "Want my fingers too? Tell me where." / etc. you get the point lmao

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

[REDACTED] will babble incoherent words when they're lost in the sauce (lol), but other than that, you'll mainly get soft groans and harsh sighs most of the time. However, if [REDACTED] is bottoming/getting pegged; it turns into bratty moans instead. And if you squeeze his hand or bite his collarbones, you'll have them practically whining into your skin and begging you to do it again.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Started crying when you said you loved him in bed for the first time. And sure, maybe he was getting his tears all over your shoulder — but he also gave you at least seven orgasms that night and a reason to take a day off from work.

X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

Packing an ~8 inch dick (~6 inches when soft), with a cute pink head to contrast the scary vibe of his Jacob's ladder piercings. Girthy enough that you can just barely wrap a hand around it, as well as pale enough to match the rest of his skin tone. Leaks a lot of precum and curves slightly when erect.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

[REDACTED] has a high sex drive, but will only indulge in it when you want to. Sex is an afterthought to him, and he won't ever push you to do anything — plus, they're more than okay with rubbing one out in the bathroom to satisfy their urges. But if you're able (and willing) to match his sex drive, you can expect to do it at least two times a day.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

They will stay up and either play with your hair, trace their fingers across your skin, gently rub your back, or even indulge in pillow talk! It all depends on what you tend to do afterwards, which [REDACTED] will easily comply with. He might even stay up and just... lose himself in his thoughts because [REDACTED] finally has you in his arms, safe and sound — where you belong.

[tossawary]

Every now and again, I'll come across some fanfiction in which an emotionally conflicted character will consult (usually kind of trashy) romance novels or in-universe fanfiction for advice or information. And it almost always snaps my suspension of disbelief.

If it's some terminally online teenage geek character or a hopeless romantic bookworm character? Sure! And, of course, there's great humor to be had in a sporty jock struggling with his queer awakening hesitantly picking up the bodice-ripper that his mum left on the coffee table. There ARE scenarios where "romance novels and fanfic as research" tracks just fine. I also understand the existence of the "I want to give this character I like the hobbies I like" / "I want to poke fun at this type / genre of fiction" aspect on the author's side.

But in any scenario with some normie adult man? Some straight, cisgender guy with normie dude hobbies and no evidence that he even CAN read, much less that he enjoys reading? Then it's a "not only would he not fucking do this, I honestly don't even believe he'd know this course of action exists" characterization situation.

Like, there are an astonishing number of people, especially dudes, who could not even name a romance novel to save their fucking life. No, not even a Jane Austen novel or "Twilight" or something. Their eyes glaze over that section of a bookstore. They are mentally filing that shit out to leave more room for sports or first-person-shooter video games or something. They have no respect for this type of fiction, if they're into reading fiction at all! They unconsciously or even explicitly believe that making eye contact with a bodice-ripper will permanently damage their masculinity, and they would flinch away from touching one like most people are scared of scorpions. They don't know aaaaanything about it! They have no concept of "the good stuff" versus "the bad stuff"; it's all soap operas and pornography to them, not a source of information.

And lots of people still don't even know that fanfiction is a thing. They go through life blissfully unaware of fandom wank. Or if they do know of fanfiction, it holds no appeal for them. Playing with other people's characters, or writing fictional stories about real people, is weirdo fanatic behavior to them! Not a source of information.

(And, to be clear, I'm not saying this tracks for all female characters. No, obviously, plenty of women don't like romance novels or fanfic. Plenty of women who do like those would never look at them as sources of information either, for a variety of very good reasons. It's just really funny when a story has the most normie bro guy to ever bro engage with this type of fiction.)

So, like, no, there are some characters whom I cannot be persuaded would ever read any of this stuff. (Speaking as a terminally online fanatic!) And honestly, there are plenty of more realistic and far funnier options for some normie dude character looking for love advice.

A) Friends and family. Or else colleagues and coworkers. It is almost always hilarious when a character goes up to someone else and says, "Hey, hypothetical scenario: [the stupidest shit you've heard in your life]. Any advice for that?" Also, you can have sincerely emotional conversations between friends! Or else good angst if the friend or family member reacts in a hostile manner or gives bad advice!

B) A magazine or chick flick movie. I can easily be persuaded that a normie dude would at least know these exist, or have one left at his house by an ex-girlfriend who made him watch it one time. Normie dudes are also more likely to consider these big publications more legitimate for advice than random romance novels or fanfic.

C) Some random advice column blog or non-fiction self-help book. Could be legitimately good advice for specific situations by a thoughtful professional, could be a money-grab scam written by a quack! How is some lovesick, emotionally dense guy supposed to tell by a book cover?

D) On that note: a relationship advice TikTok influencer or YouTuber or some random advice forum, probably Reddit or the like. The pros and the quacks are unhelpfully everywhere now! And possibly even have a live chat acting as their studio audience to make airing dirty laundry more toxic than ever. Potentially, you will find the kindest person alive with a terrible username willing to gently walk you through therapy, the online equivalent of meeting a figurative angel in a dive bar, but probably not. Bad advice is much more likely.

E) Doing no research, remaining uninformed, and blustering through the situation based on random pre-conceptions if anything. Honestly, I think some of these guys would just ignore the problem, even a potentially deadly problem, rather than touch a Harlequin romance novel, much less AO3 fanfiction. Sexism and internalized homophobia are a hell of a drug. It's just not happening.

I don't have a clean conclusion for this, it's just a funny thing that I've noticed every now and again. There ARE guys who like these types of fiction, of course! There ARE male characters who own an e-reader full of rom novels, sure, and don't give a shit what anyone else thinks. "This [normie male character who is both pretty offline and worries about appearing sufficiently masculine in a pretty toxic way] is reading a lot of romance novels and/or fanfiction as a form of research!" Yeah, no, that's really hard to pull off. If this guy is touching the internet at all, he's far more likely to make the most ridiculous Reddit post you've ever seen and then start belligerent fights in the comments.

[antivanwine14]

I see the posts asking what Rook brings to the squad. What is Rook good at when the rest of the Squad are experts in their fields? Rook isn't necessary to the rest. This isn't true.

A) Rook is probably the most skilled out of all the protagonists we've had. You can head canon things, but the truth is the HOF and Inquisitor were not masters in their fields before they got supremely unlucky and landed with a skill they didn't really want. Hawke really was just a person who developed over time. Rook starts as a hero who is very skilled in their craft. I'm going to speak on this from Crow Rook POV because that is who I know best, but this does apply to the others as well. Crow Rook took down 20 Antaam alone. That is not something the average Crow can do. That is skilled enough to impress Varric and get the role to work with him.

B) Rook knows how to get themselves into and out of trouble. Yes, Rook does know how to get into trouble, but Rook also sees opportunities others miss. In the opening, Harding's plan is to fire on Solas. She doesn't consider other options beside the one she is most comfortable with. Neve tells Harding no, but she also doesn't give a better solution either. Rook is the one who looks around to find other solutions.

Additionally, I wish this was commented on more but other characters acknowledge this skill of finding opportunities. Varric says to an unromanced Inquisitor that Rook is very good at Wicked Grace, a game all about cheating and opportunities. If Rook de Riva abandons Treviso, Viago also comments on this skill, that Rook would have found a way to help their city. Rook sees opportunities others miss. This is a very important skill that the other companions don't really have. There is a phrase, to a hammer, everything looks like a nail and our companions do that. Our companions are very skilled at what they do, but that means they don't usually look outside of the solution that fits their skills best, ie: Harding is always looking for the shot, Lucanis's solutions usually involve daggers, etc.

C) Rook has the soft skills to lead. Soft skills are completely underrated in life. Some people just assume that the person with the best skills at something should be the leader. This is how we get really awful leaders who have no people skills and treat their teams like crap. Leadership takes skills and none of the companions have those skills at the start. Davrin and Neve end the game as leaders, but both start having the same issue of being lone wolves who struggle to trust others. They need to learn how to trust others. Harding would probably be the best of the rest, but she is dealing with her own internal struggles with her new stone powers and the anger the titans are feeling. Rook might have some issues with confidence as being a leader, but Rook has great soft skills that allow the team to open up to them and trust them with the team's issues. Rook's confidence issues goes away with time as they get used to the role and it is the soft skills that make Rook so valuable.

Rook built the team. Remove Rook and the team would never have functioned as well as they did because of the work Rook did. Yes, they were able to accomplish a lot while Rook was in the Fade Prison, but that was because Rook had done their job. Rook had built a great team that knew what they had to do, were able to work together, and were able to do it until they could get Rook back. They trusted what Rook had done because they trusted Rook. I don't see them getting nearly as far without Rook and so Rook is absolutely essential for the squad.