#avi burton

[have-you-read-this-short-fiction]

"Carrying Stones" by Avi Burton is available to read here

[adriabailton]

Triptych

by Avi Burton

via Escape Pod

[byfulcrums]

I just watched the Alice in Wonderland live action movie (the 2010 one) because I remember watching it when I was younger and it was a very important memory to me, so I looked for it and rewatched it

But apparently it's very hated??? And bad?? Why? I was looking for some reasons in Google and most of the stuff I saw could he easily disproven, at least from this one specific thing I found (I haven't been looking that much but the reasons seem pretty stupid ngl)

Can someone give me good reasons why it's bad?? Without the whole "Alice looks bored the entire time besides the scene where she was falling down a hole" she thought she was dreaming so I can understand that one

[missrebelximvu]

Jack Skellington 💀

[motherofplatypus]

Bisan Owda is a journalist in Gaza that keeps updating about the barbaric genocide actions that israel committed with weapons supplied mainly by US, all the while living through that genocide itself.

Over 30k+ has been killed, and over 15k+ of those are children and babies.

The celebs and artists who wanted to rescind Bisan's nomination are as follow:

Ari Ingel, Executive Director, Creative Community for Peace

David Renzer, Former Chairman/CEO Universal Music Publishing Group, CCFP Chairman & Co-Founder

Steve Schnur, Worldwide Executive & Music President, Electronic Arts, CCFP Co-Founder

Rakefet Abergel, Actor/Director, Cyclamen Films

Orly Adelson, Former President of ITV Studios, America

Marty Adelstein, CEO, Tomorrow Studios

Anne-Marie Asner, Co-Founder, Animation Israel

Jeff Astrof, TV Producer/Showrunner, Other Shoe Productions

Michael Auerbach, Partner, Jackoway Austen Tyerman Wertheimer Mandelbaum Morris Bernstein Trattner Auerbach Hynick Jaime LeVine Sample & Klein

Dean Bahat, Attorney, Ziffren Brittenham

Andrea Ballas, VP Comms, CBS

Jackie Barrie, A&R Manager, Nvak Collective

Richard Baskind, Partner & Head of Music, Simons Muirhead & Burton

Aton Ben-Horin, Executive VP of Global A&R, Atlantic Records Group

Steven Bensusan, President, Blue Note Entertainment Group

Adam Berkowitz, Founder and President, Lenore Entertainment Group

Sharon Bialy, Casting Director, Bialy/Thomas & Associates

Josh Binder, Co-Founder and Partner, Rothenberg Mohr & Binder, LLP

Neil Blair, Founding Partner, The Blair Partnership

Selma Blair, Actress, Author, Advocate, Sainted Productions

Rebecca Blumberg, SVP Ad Sales, Paramount

Evan Bogart, Songwriter & CEO, Seeker Music

Benjamin Budde, CEO, Budde Group GmbH

Bruce Burger, Producer, RebbeSoul

David Byrnes, Attorney, Ziffren Brittenham

Civia Caroline, Social Impact Consultant, CLiC Impact

Pamela Charbit, Director of A&R, Warner Music Group

Emmanuelle Chriqui, Actor, Yellow Ray Entertainment

Leanne Coronel, Talent Manager, The Coronel Group

Raye Cosbert, Managing Director, Metropolis Musi

Paul Craig, Ceo, Nostromo Management

Doug Davis, NATAS Member, 2x Emmy winner, The Davis Firm

Rebecca De Mornay, Actor

Jamie Denbo, Co-Executive Producer, Grey’s Anatomy, ABC/Disney

Josh Deutsch, Chairman/CEO, Premier Music Group

Avi Diamond, Director, Film/TV Sync, Warner Music Canada

Craig Dorfman, President and Owner, Frontline MGMT

Rachel Douglas, Manager, Range Media Partners

David Draiman, Frontman, Disturbed

Jeremy Drysdale, Screenwriter, bigbamboo

Craig Emanuel, Ryan Murphy Productions

Hannah Epstein, Agent, CAA

Rami “Kosha dillz” Even-Esh, Rapper/Comic/Actor

Lindsay Fabes, Actor

Ron Fair, Record Producer & CEO, Faircraft Inc.

Sharon Farber, Composer, Score by Score Music

Danny Federman, Owner, Maccabi Tel Aviv Basketball Club

Eric Feig, Attorney and TV Academy Member, Feig/Finkel

Patti Felker, Attorney, Felker Toczek Suddleson McGinnis Ryan LLP

Ken Fermaglich, Partner, United Talent Agency

Ross “Remedy” Filler, Artist

Shalom Fisch, President, MediaKidz Research & Consulting

David Fishof, CEO, RRFC Films, LLC

Siri Garber, Publicist, Platform

David Gardner, President, Artists First

Barbara Garshman, CEO, Garshman Productions LLC

Gary Gersh

Gary Ginsberg, Senior VP, SoftBank Group Corp.

Brian Ralston, Composer/Producer, Studio 74 Music, LLC

David Glick, Founder & CEO, Edge Group

Zusha Goldin, Celebrity Photographer, Zusha Goldin

Michael Goldwasser, President, Easy Star Records

Andrew Gould, President, Music Publishing

Scott Greenberg, Partner, LBI

Steven Greenberg, Founder and President, S-Curve Records

Daniel Grindlinger, Writer

Ronnie Harris, Partner, Harris & Trotter

Michael Hirschhorn, Manager, Streaming and Sales, Atlantic Records

Linda Edell Howard, Attorney, Novick Law

Rich Ingram, Artist/Creator

Neil Jacobson, Former President, Geffen Records, Founder & CEO of Hallwood Media

Michael Kaplan, Writer/Producer

Sam Katz, Music Manager, Homebase MGMT, LLC

Zach Katz, CEO & Co-Founder, Fixated

Ketura Kestin, Film Producer, Serendipity Productions

Amanda Kogan, Manager, Aaron Kogan Management

Keetgi Kogan Steinberg, Writer/Producer/Showrunner

Jason Kozel, Creative Executive, Range Media Partners

Rick Krim, CEO, Krim Music + Media

Evan Lamberg, President, North America, Universal Music Publishing Group

Sherry Lansing, Former CEO, Paramount Pictures

Colin Lester OBE, Founder/Chairman, JEM Music Group

Sean Liebowitz, Agent

Koura Linda, Founder & CEO, Space Dream Productions

Marci Liroff, Intimacy Coordinator/Casting Director

Cory Litwin, Managing Partner, Range Media Partners

David Lonner, CEO, The David Lonner Company

Ben Maddahi, President, Unrestricted Publishing & Mgmt

Gabriel Mann, Composer

Deborah Marcus, Executive, CAA Foundation

Susan Markheim, Full Stop Mgt., The Azoff Company

Amanda Markowitz, Actor/Producer, SAG/AFTRA & PGA

Orly Marley, President, Tuff Gong Worldwide

Devra Maza, Screenwriter

Debra Messing, Actor/Producer

Hilary Michael, Agent and Partner, WME

Beth Milstein, Writer

Jennifer Morrow, Actor, CAA

Patrick Moss, Writer, Moroccan Boychik

Robert Munic, Writer/Showrunner, Pull The Pin Productions, Inc.

Lisa Nupoff, Manager, iminmusic management

Scott Packman, Founder and Managing Member, SSP Partners LLC

Mark Pinkus, President, Rhino Records

Jonah Platt, Actor/Producer

Wendy Plaut, SVP Music & Celebrity Talent, Paramount Global

Jessica Poter, Writer, Gustavo Anibal Productions

Golan Ramraz, Writer/Producer, EGX Film Factory

Bruce Resnikof

Frederic Richter, Producer, Writer & Researcher

Wendy Robbins, Executive Producer, Creators Inc

Dan Rosen, President, Warner Music Australasia

Rick Rosen, Co-Founder, Endeavor, WME

Aaron Rosenberg, Partner, Myman Greenspan Fox Rosenberg Mobasser Younger & Light

Gregg Rossen, Screenwriter

Michael Rotenberg, CEO, 3 Arts Entertainment

Joshua Rothstein, CEO/Founder, Ice Cream For Dinner

Haim Saban, Chairman and CEO, Saban Capital Group

Glenn Sanders, Writer/Director/Creative Director, Masonry Creative

Ayelet Schiffman, SVP Head of Promotions, Island Records

Paul Schindler, Senior Partner, Greenberg Traurig LLC

Jordan Schur, CEO and Chairman, Mimran Schur Pictures and Suretone Entertainment

Adam Schwartz, Writer

Sam Schwartz, Partner, Gorfaine/Schwartz Agency

Jay Schweid, Founder/CEO, ephelants/Village

Adam Segal, President, The 2050 Group

Ben Silverman, Chairman and Co-CEO, Propagate Content

Ralph Simon, Chairman & Chief Executive Officer, Mobilium Global Limited

Tamar Simon, Owner/CEO, Mean Streets Management

Martin Singer, Attorney, Lavely and Singer

Halle Stanford, President of Television, The Jim Henson Company

Mimi Steinberg, Writer/Producer

Jonathan Steinsapir, Partner, Kinsella Holley Iser Kump Steinsapir

Gary Stiffelman, Founder, GSS Law

Traci Symanski, CEO, Co-Star Entertainment

Aaron Symonds, Film Composer

Fernando Szew, President, Fox Entertainment

Tal Tavin, Actor

Adam Taylor, President, APM Music

Michael Testa, Casting Director, Michael Testa Casting

Fred Toczek, Partner, Felker Toczek Suddleson Abramson McGinnis Ryan LLP

Eric Tuchman, Writer/Producer, MGM-TV

Noa Vinshtok, Streaming, Range Media Partners

Joshua Washington, International Recording Artist, JoDavi Music LLC

Avi Weider, Filmmaker, Loop Filmworks

Jon Weinbach, President, Skydance Sports

Nola Weinstein, Tech Executive

Ilana Wernick, Writer/Producer, Fox

Modi Wiczyk, Co-Founder, MRC

Evan Winiker, Managing Partner, Range Music

Seth Yanklewitz, Casting Director, Yanklewitz Pollack Casting

Sharon Tal Yguado, Founder & CEO, Astrid Entertainment

Ky Zaretsky, Manager, Range Media Partners

David Zedeck, Global Co-Head of Music

[Sources: here, here, and here]

[girafeduvexin]

Est-ce que vous savez pourquoi il n'y a pas ou peu d'essai en vidéo (au sens Montaigne du terme) sur le youtube français ?

C'est une vraie question parce que ça me tourmente en ce moment. Je parle d'essai, comme Jacob Geller, Hbomberguy, Broey Deschanel, Shaun, Lady Emily. Si vous connaissez pas, je vais citer certaines de leurs vidéos, mais en gros, des essais, aussi bien à l'écrit qu'en vidéo, c'est une réflexion subjective sur un sujet. Montaigne a plus ou moins inventé le terme si je ne me trompe pas et dans son propre livre, il parle aussi bien de racisme que de médecine, de la peur de la mort, toujours à la 1ère personne. Les textes sont en soi ordonnés mais il revendique lui-même de ne pas avoir de méthodologie particulière : ce n'est pas thèse / antithèse / synthèse, intro et conclusion etc.

(Ca risque d'être long donc je coupe ici)

Et sur youtube, en tout cas le youtube américain, on voit ces dernières années des gens qui vont comme Montaigne mais en vidéo, analyser par exemple l'art moderne et le fascisme, le method acting et en quoi c'est problématique, ou la vidéo très connue de Hbomberguy sur Sherlock. Après, on peut considérer que cette dernière vidéo est plus une critique mais personnellement, je trouve qu'il apporte des considérations plus générales sur les séries policières et le travail de Moffat qui dépassent largement la simple critique. On peut aussi citer l'excellente vidéo de Designing For sur Kirby, qui analyse comment les jeux Kirby réussissent à avoir un lore assez profond et sombre sans lourdeur et en restant des jeux légers et vraiment amusants. Bref, y en a beaucoup, sur des sujets très différents mais ce que ces vidéos ont en commun, c'est de proposer d'une part des analyses précises et profondes et d'autre part, un point de vue, une opinion, un vrai engagement de la part de l'essayiste.

Or, dans le youtube français, c'est peu courant. Ca existe, on a Nostalgeek qui a fait une vidéo sur la difficulté dans les jeux vidéos, on a Alphi qui analyse des youtubeurs, des films, des séries et surtout, on a eu l'excellent Karim Debbache, qui après Crossed et Chroma, continue sur Twitch à analyser parfois des films, des jeux vidéo, il a par exemple donné un avis très intéressant sur le film Mario. C'est plus un avis donné à chaud, donc je ne pense pas qu'on puisse techniquement appeler ça un essai mais concrètement, ça a les mêmes qualités : une subjectivité, une analyse approfondie...

(Edit : j'oubliais MisterJday, super aussi.)

Et au passage, sans critiquer, mais Feldup, ce n'est pas un essayiste pour moi, c'est plus un travail documentaire qu'il fait : il cherche des informations sur des jeux oubliés, des mythes d'internet et il nous les présente, et c'est très intéressant, et c'est un super boulot mais ce n'est pas de l'essai, c'est une autre forme de vidéo.

Mon avis, c'est que pour faire un essai, il faut oser prendre parti, ce que faisait/fait Karim Debbache, en disant ouvertement ce qu'il pense de certains films ou de ce qu'est le cinéma en général, même l'art, par exemple quand il parle du second degré et qu'il montre que c'est une très mauvaise excuse. Or, je peeeense que le youtube français préfère parfois être très "neutre" sur beaucoup de sujets, sans doute par peur de perdre de l'audience, je ne sais pas, mais en tout cas, prendre position est "risqué" et évidemment, difficile de faire de bons essais sans ça.

EDIT : j'y réfléchissais dans le bus et selon moi, la différence entre un essai et une vidéo type documentaire/exposé, c'est la présence d'une problématique, même simpliste. La problématique de la vidéo de Broey Deschanel sur Tim Burton, c'est "Peut-on dire que les films de Tim Burton ont perdu en qualité et si oui, à partir de quand ?" (Je simplifie) et en répondant à cette question, elle donne son avis. Dans une vidéo de Feldup, il n'y a pas de problématique, il nous présente un jeu, des faits divers, des creepy pasta et j'insiste, ce n'est pas grave, il n'a pas à avoir de problématique, c'est un autre type de vidéo, qui ont un autre intérêt et qui peuvent parfois me plaire d'ailleurs. Je le prends en exemple parce que c'est lui qu'on me sort quand je cherche des essais vidéos français, mais je n'ai vraiment aucune critique à lui faire.

[whitebelt-witch]

hej! I just finished reading Your Body is Not Your Body, a queer/trans horror anthology edited by Alex Woodroe and Matt Blairstone, and published by Tenebrous Press in 2022.

I LOVED this collection so much! As is the case with any anthology comprised of multiple creators, some contributions really hit while others really didn’t, and some were just simply not my speed. regardless of my feelings of the individual tales, however, my identity as a weird girl who loves the horrific implications of a Body In Transition left me feeling so happy that there exists enough work in this niche that is unique enough for me to have such a varied experience with this book.

Much of the writing was also quite resonant, shoutout to in particular to Ori Jay and Bitter Karella’s style. However if I had to highlight two stories for being the standout works in the collection I have to highlight Viktor Athelstan’s “Brother Maternitas” and Avi Burton’s “Fencing Chestplate.” The former concerns a devout medieval monk who undergoes a surprising change (and features an ending that had my jaw ON THE FLOOR), while the latter tale is about a young student who will take…hellish measures to make his dream sports team.

Overall though if you’re looking for weird horror fiction about bodies, I cannot recommend this collection enough!

[trustfundandpunishers]

           —    🎬    just   announced,    avery    burton    is    casted    as    willow    rosenberg    in    upcoming    buffy    reboot.    the    twenty    three    year    old    is    trending    as    people    are    debating    if    the    quiet    life,    new    york    city    lights,    saviour    complex,    early    retirement    plans    aesthetic    that    they    are    known    for    is    enough    to    make    them    as    good    as    original.    a    quick    google    search    shows    that    their    fans    call    them    understanding,    but    internet    trolls    think    they’re    more    cold.    i    guess    their    newest    interview    for    variety    where    they    talk    about    giving    up    on    roles    for    their    mental    health    will    let    people    to    know    them    better.    

WANTED CONNECTIONS / / PLAYLIST / / PINTEREST .

﹙★﹚ 𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐬 ::

♡ full name. avery burton. ♡ nickname(s). avy / baby burton (by the media). ♡ zodiac. capricorn sun, pisces rising, pisces moon. ♡ gender. non binary. ♡ pronouns. they / them. ♡ orientation. homoromantic / homosexual. ♡ nationality. american. ♡ ethnicity. caucasian. ♡ occupation. currently playing willow rosenberg in the buffy reboot.

﹙★﹚ 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 ::

♡ birthplace. new york city, new york, united states. ♡ current home. los angeles, california & nyc (flies back and forth). ♡ language(s). english (native).

﹙★﹚ 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 ::

♡ positive traits. understanding, giving, loyal. ♡ negative traits. emotionally constipated, closed off, cold. ♡ character inspo: chloe price.

tw. parental death, addiction, poor mental health. 

2003 — NEW NEPO BABY IN THE AREA? (justin burton finally announces why he’s been taking a hiatus from the big screen!)  :: it only took the actor about three years to come out and say it— he and late rockstar eloise burton did have a little bundle of joy way back when. since her sudden death we’ve all been wondering if it was just grief or something more keeping him away from us. it’s clear as day now: avery burton has their dad busy, maybe too busy.

2005 — DAD AND BABY STAR TOGETHER! (avery’s first role— and maybe last?) :: aren’t we all just obsessed with single dad justin burton and his most recent role, single dad goes on dates? well, this publication thinks it’s getting old. come on, dad! hire a babysitter and come back to your diehard fans.

2017 — BURTON IS PULLING STRINGS! (can his child ever live up to his career?) :: well, folks! it seems like little avery is getting their very own show— we’re expecting nothing more but stellar performances from someone with such big shoes to fill.

2018 — NO MORE BEST DAD EVER! (is single dad finally too tired to keep going?) :: apparently, dad’s new engagement has left little avery in a hoot! underage drinking and defacing a property all in one? i guess we’ll have to wait and see what the burton-roans decide to do next.

2020 — AVERY BURTON’S DEADLY COMEBACK! (can a good performance make us forget it all?) :: cut off from daddy’s influence, they’ve been having to fend for themselves… but maybe it’s for the best. their role as jamie in the haunting of bly manor has left all of us pleasantly surprised. are things turning around for our favorite little nepo babe? 

2022 — JUSTIN BURTON DEAD AT 42?! :: this publication is devastated to announce the tragic passing of actor justin burton. his management has yet to announce a cause of death.

2023 — OOF! BACK FROM REHAB AND ALREADY SEEN AT A BAR! (things aren’t looking so good for avery burton lately…) :: it took them less than forty-eight hour to drop out from almost all of their projects and get a pretty clear shot of themselves leaving valerie with their arm around another one of the various nepo babies infesting new york city right now. is avery ever getting their shit together?! come on, do it for dad.

[lesparaversdemillina]

Série : Mercredi Saison 1 par Tim Burton

Mercredi Saison 1Mon avis En résumé Notation Synopsis Résumé en image Saisons suivantes Si vous aimez, vous aimerez peut-être et vice versa Qu’en avez-vous pensé ? Quelles séries me suggérez vous ou me conseillez-vous ? Mon avis Tim Burton est un réalisateur que j’aime beaucoup, même si je n’ai pas tout aimé de lui. Mercredi Addams fait partie de ses films à l’ambiance étrange, mais étonnante.…

[roeza]

T.V.B.W.C 6.4

okay so I tried to turn Akito into a vampire again.

but it just doesn't work.

it's like he's immune to the vampire virus or Sumthing.

Dillon had his first baby

Vernon

Lydia moved in

Avis convinced Lydia to leave her husband

and then Avis purposed.

Lydia had Marcell and Marceline

yes like that Marceline

i gave Lydia a makeover

Brandon has had 4 babies

Trenton

Ashlee

Khalil

Sammy

umm okay bad things are happening ummm

so i started the wedding

and then I left to get food

and I did not realize i left the game running

and now Avis is possessed by the mother.

omg it was Kyoko who had it.

oh my god he looks so creepy!

okay so they had to get Married inside cause i fuck up and thoght am was pm.

or Sumthing like that

so Avis getting infected might be the best thing to happen cause it makes all his needs %100

You know if i get those fruits it might up his needs every time he eats one.

i mean you know he can't get more infected.

yep it dose but he just get possessed for a little while.

so i bought 50

does this mean Avis is a substance user now.

oh and it ups his needs when he gets possessed at night.

umm Lydia thinks Avis cheated on her even tho this is the rare time he hasn't cheated

oh my god NO She's embarrassed cause she Created on Avis

that Bitch

oh my god she is going to have a painful death.

oh my god it's with our daughter!

No NOT MY LITTTLE GIRL !!!

now she is going to die a vary vary painful death

to Eveie's credit she rejected her

okay so i was going to have Lydia and Avis have one more baby but now that i have this information I'm going to make them have a science baby instead so that way we don't have to go through a 3 day pregnancy

so that way we can kill that Bitch as soon as possible

okay we Started the dinner party yes while we have a science baby.

i know she's a bitch but look at how pretty she looks

and just a Vary concerned Adam in the background

Lydia Had OZzie

Oh MY GOD LYDIA IS DIEING OF ENBARASSMENT AT THE PARTY!!!

Oh Well now i kind of feel bad

it's obvious she felt remorse if she had to die over it.

Oh wait she cheated at our wedding nvm fuck that bitch

oh wait that means we still don't move forward with the challenge fuck!

okay she's dead

okay so a lot of the kids aged up

first Haven

then Luka

Then Ezra

Then Noha

who looks like if Avis was a Tim burton Character

then Marcell

and then Marceline

Lucifer and Michael aged up too but im not going to move them out until Akito ages up too

also i took this before i could edit everyone's outfit but loook

there so grown up.

that's what they're going to look like with their own babies.

AWWWW

it's so cute.

Adam's Shelley and Kaden aged up.

here is Shelley.

And here is Kaden

oh he's like a white Harid Caden

oh i miss my green boy

he looked so much like Kaden i gave him a Residence Key

OH MY GOD Michael GOT INFECTED SUMHOW

how did he get infected?

oh my god this is so sad

the Baby wants attention but everyone is infected AND DOSENT CARE

this is why you don't do drugs kids.

Lucifer Feals hurt by Michael.

oh my god I sware Lucifer is the only person in this house that can get stuff done anymore.

OZzie aged up.

[aforcedelire]

Miniaturiste, Jessie Burton

En 1686 alors qu’elle est âgée de 18 ans, la jeune Nella quitte le domicile familial pour rejoindre à Amsterdam son futur époux, Johannes Brandt. Homme d’âge mûr, il est un des marchands les plus prospères de la VOC (la compagnie néerlandaise des Indes orientales), et il vit avec deux domestiques et sa sœur Marin, qui accueille Nella de façon plus que froide. Pour l’occuper lors de son absence due à ses nombreux voyages, Johannes offre à Nella la réplique miniature de leur demeure, qu’elle va se faire une joie de meubler auprès d’un miniaturiste de la ville. Mais très vite, ses commandes vont mettre au jour de dangereux secrets…

J’ai adoré ce roman ! Une ancienne collègue m’en avait vanté les mérites et m’avait assuré que j’allais aimer, et maintenant que je l’ai (enfin) lu, je peux dire qu’elle avait raison ! D’abord, j’ai adoré l’histoire : cette jeune fille d’à peine 18 ans, propulsée dans une nouvelle et grande ville, qui est accueillie de façon très étrange dans sa nouvelle demeure. Qui ne comprend pas pourquoi l’ambiance reste sombre et cachottière. Ça m’a beaucoup rappelé Rebecca, j’ai vraiment aimé l’aspect gothique et incertain qui se dégage de Miniaturiste. Surtout lorsqu’entre en scène l’artiste, avec son envoi mystérieux et indésirable ; d’autant plus quand Nella commence à découvrir les secrets de sa nouvelle famille… J’ai beaucoup aimé la suivre ! Tout m’a vraiment plu, je le recommande chaudement. Je l’ai dévoré, et passée la moitié, je l’ai englouti, je voulais vraiment avoir le fin mot de l’histoire. (Et au moment où j’écris cet avis, je suis déjà à la moitié de la suite 🤭)

19/12/2023 - 28/12/2023

[have-you-read-this-short-fiction]

"The Body Fate" is available to read here

[adriabailton]

Carrying Stones By Avi Burton

via Cossmass Infinities

[fictionz]

New Fiction 2024 - September

"The Cold Embrace" by Mary Elizabeth Braddon (1860)

To ghost, to suffer, to feel her hands.

"The Love Letter" by Jack Finney (1959)

We should be so lucky to have even a single letter to our name.

"Doggy-Dog World" by Hilary Leichter (2020)

We are what we want what we are what we want.

My Sister, the Serial Killer by Oyinkan Braithwaite (2018)

Not the horror story I expected, but rather a darkly comedic look at Nigerian society, and really society at large and the expectations and privileges we are afforded. The narrator had a particular approach to life that will click with anyone who can't let that mote of dust rest in peace.

Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata & trans. Ginny Tapley Takemori (2016)

We should all be so lucky as to find our own convenience store.

Dinotopia: A Land Apart from Time by James Gurney (1992)

Dinosaurs and humans create a wondrous socialist utopia, accompanied by gorgeous art. Also some pleistocene mammals for good measure.

Carmilla by Sheridan Le Fanu (1872)

The Austrian countryside is a gothic teenage wasteland.

Dead Space by Kali Wallace (2021)

You solve A.I. crimes, what do you get? A prosthetic shoulder and deeper in debt.

Allegiance in Exile by David R. George III (2013)

Allegiance in Exile is a bit scattered in the plot but they have a really cool and subtle reveal near the end. It's also interesting to hang out with Kirk as the five-year mission comes to a close. Who are you, who am I, when the thing is done and the future awaits?

The Baby-sitter by R.L. Stine (1989)

Things move along predictably and then WHOA he really ratchets up the horror at the end, particularly for a book targeted at young teens. As the advertisement at the end of the book states, nobody scares 'em like R.L. Stine.

Be Afraid — Be Very Afraid! by R.L. Stine (1999)

Aw R.L., you had me going! It's a strange format at first, then it starts to get intriguing, but then the page count limit rears its head and the story wraps up way too blithely.

The Curse of the Creeping Coffin by R.L. Stine (1996)

Doesn't hit the same wacky highs as the previous entry, but the myriad ghost adventures won me over in the end.

"Under the Floorboards" by Emily Carroll (2012)

It's all fun and games until you and you can't work it out.

"Nightfall" by Bill DuBay & Bernie Wrightson (1977)

Who else would it be at this time of night?

"Monster War" by Joy Chin, Christopher Golden, Tom Sniegoski, Vitor Ishimura, Scott Kester, Trroy Peteri (2005)

Lots of cooks in this kitchen, ingredients in this stew. The monster mash is more interesting than the IP side of the dish.

"The wind carries your last cry away" by avi (2024)

And at long last only the hills will know.

A Guest in the House by Emily Carroll (2023)

It doesn't matter if you see what you think you saw. It's there, waiting for you.

Frankenstein: Junji Ito Story Collection by Junji Ito (2018)

Read it for Frankenstein, stay for the strange tales of Oshikiri and his poorly secured house.

Frankenstein 2000 dev. Peter Fothergill (1985)

Only vaguely related to Frankenstein but such a creative collection of levels that it doesn't matter, they're still great.

Castle Frankenstein dev. Epic Software (1984)

Oh, sweet forgiving parser and high contrast colors. With those basics out of the way, this is a text adventure game that can actually be enjoyed.

The Crow dir. Rupert Sanders (2024)

The look of a crow but the heart of a checklist.

1992 dir. Ariel Vromen (2024)

Couldn't decide between the backdrop or the foreground.

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice dir. Tim Burton (2024)

Just hang in there for the finale.

The Front Room dir. Max Eggers & Sam Eggers (2024)

You're here for Kathryn Hunter.

Häxan dir. Benjamin Christensen (1922)

Now that's something. It presaged true crime television with live reenactments.

Friday the 13th: A New Beginning dir. Danny Steinmann (1985)

I guess you have to try and get away.

The Critic dir. Anand Tucker (2024)

Delightfully devilish, Sir Ian.

Paranormal Activity dir. Oren Peli (2007)

Whoa that's a slow simmer with a spicy kick.

Speak No Evil dir. James Watkins (2024)

I suppose, but the ending is lacking and we all know it.

The Killer's Game dir. J. J. Perry (2024)

I wish I could be there but I fell overboard early on.

Vampyr dir. Carl Theodor Dreyer (1932)

Not quite the classic vampirism I crave.

November dir. Rainer Sarnet (2017)

Listen, gardening tool servants possessed by demons.

Crimson Peak dir. Guillermo del Toro (2015)

Looks pretty!

Whiplash dir. Damien Chazelle (2014)

JK Simmons is too good at being the worst.

The Substance dir. Coralie Fargeat (2024)

I too made noises of discomfort for the duration.

Never Let Go dir. Alexandre Aja (2024)

On the edge of something, but never at the heart of it.

The Others dir. Alejandro Amenábar (2001)

A slow and perhaps predictable build to the sublime.

The Purge dir. James DeMonaco (2013)

We're not supposed to want more.

Wolfs dir. Jon Watts (2024)

The classic fun of assassination friends.

Bagman dir. Colm McCarthy (2024)

Just creepy enough to getcha.

Azrael dir. E.L. Katz (2024)

Needs a survival horror video game stat.

The Wild Robot dir. Chris Sanders (2024)

Gorgeous scenery and heartfelt robot moments my beloved.

Megalopolis dir. Francis Ford Coppola (2024)

Should I go and take a classics class again?

Rosemary's Baby dir. Roman Polanski (1968)

I waited for the twist and its arrival was so subtle that it made me stop and think about where I was.

Invasion of the Body Snatchers dir. Philip Kaufman (1978)

We lost something when we stopped employing the hushed and overlapping dialogue of the 70s. This remake is chock full of that and running scenes with with very audible footsteps. But it's also creepy as heck and surprisingly fleshy.

[pascal-et-sarah]

Séance du Mercredi 2024-01-10

Guess who's back (et backupé dans le cloud loin de tumblr)?

Je crois que le monsieur il est mort

Charlie et la Chocolaterie - Netflix - 1h55 - 🇺🇸🍫🐿️

Je suis grand fan de Roald Dahl même si le monsieur est un immonde antisémite et donc j'ai adoré petit (et même moins petit) le roman dont est tiré ce film. Le petit Charlie est pauvre (Dickens pauvre pour ceux qui ont la réf) et il n'aime que deux choses dans la vie, sa famille et le chocolat qu'il ne peut manger qu'une fois par an. Quand le mystérieux Willy Wonka, le plus grand chocolatier du monde organise un concours pour visiter sa chocolaterie vous vous demandez bien qui c'est qui va gagner le ticket d'or...

Le film est une adaptation (trop?) fidèle d'un livre pour enfant. Tim Burton maîtrise son sujet, la production design est au top, les enfants jouent pas mal et les petites chansons sont entrainante. Il faut parler aussi de Johnny Depp qui est absolument terrifiant en Wonka, à l'époque il jouait encore un peu dans ses films (maintenant il ne fait plus que se jouer lui même...). Au global le film est un compte, un poil trop sage par rapport à l'original car trop respectueux du matériaux d'origine.

6/10

Ah mais ouais il a fait 13 films non?

Le Garçon et le Héron - 君たちはどう生きるか - Cinéma - 2h04 - 🇯🇵🪿🏹

Le plus grand réalisateur de film d'animation japonais (le plus grand c'est Ozu deal with it) revient après un énième départ à la retraite pour ce qui ressemble quand même à son dernier film (83 ans tout de même). Le film est un film "à tiroirs" donc il ne faut pas s'attendre à tout comprendre "ceux qui cherchent à comprendre mourrons" annonce rapidement le procédé narratif.

Le flm est d'une virtuosité folle et passe en 4ème vitesse l'ensemble des obsessions du maître Myazaki (le rapport de l'Homme à la nature, les civilisations anciennes, la technologie, les avions, les anciennes créatures, la maternité...) parfois un poil trop vite. Au final on pleure beaucoup si on a un rapport particulier (comme toute ma génération) à ces films qui ont participé à donner à l'animation ses lettres de noblesse.

8/10

C'est la suite du précédent en attendant le suivant

Les trois mousquetaires: Milady - Cinéma - 1h54 - 🇫🇷🤺⚜️

La suite direct de "Les trois mousquetaires: D'artagnan" continue de dérouler la fresque épique de la littérature française, le chef d’œuvre de Dumas... Les trois mousquetaires. Ici c'est le siège de La Rochelle et les conséquence de l'assassinat déjoué dans l'opus précédent. Comme il a été tourné dans la foulée et bien c'est un peu la même chose.

Toujours incapable de filmé une baston correctement Mr. Bourboulon (si il n’existait pas on voudrait l'inventer) se réveille dans les 12 dernières minutes où finalement une formidable baston dans le feu se révèle plaisante à regarder. Au global le film est moins intéressant que le premier car plus linéaire. La fin annonce un troisième opus, à mon avis ça va être compliqué au vu du box office, mais comme Netflix l'a acheté à l'international (je crois) ça devrait le faire en 2026.

6/10

Pour les plus attentifs vous remarquerez que les liens de cette Newsletter ne sont plus vers The Movie DB mais vers LetterBoxd. C'est du lobbying honteux puisque je tente de me détacher d'amazon et de son toujours plus complet IMDb.

Bisous.

[andrewmoocow]

Steven Universe Snake Eyes chapter 4: Climbing the Ladders (originally posted on September 18, 2023)

AN: We're just about two chapters away from the end of this story's first half. Afterwards, it'll be non-stop action, revelations, and drama from here on out, and you have no choice but to come along for the ride! Kind of like me for the past near three years now. Look at me, I was only a college freshman when I published the first chapter of Alternate Future, and now I'm a senior writing out the epic finale to this alternate universe. Funny how time flies, huh? I feel so old.

Synopsis: The Gems fight for survival against fellow unwilling warriors from far and wide.

Cast:

Zach Callison as Steven

Estelle as Garnet

Michaela Dietz as Amethyst

Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl

Tom Scharpling as Greg

Grace Rolek as Connie

Zach Steel as Ronaldo

Atticus Shaffer as Peedee

Jennifer Paz as Lapis

Shelby Rabara as Peridot

Uzo Aduba as Bismuth

Kimberly Brooks as Jasper

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Della Saba as Aquamarine

Charlyne Yi as Eyeball

Gina Torres as Andesine

Barbara Dunkelmann as Amber

Kristen Schaal as Howlite

Avi Roque as Cinnabar

Aurelio Voltaire as King Cobralan Serpentes

Jason Marsden as Prince Nosiop Serpentes

Keith David as Pyth

Kari Wahlgren as Envyrno

Peter Cullen as Titanium

Terrence C. Carson as The Decimator

Beau Billingslea as Sheriff Spiegel

Steven Blum as Deputy Edward

Dominic Armato as Captain Gearfeet

Wally Wingert as Rigby Starglow

Frank Welker as Tungsten

David Kaye as Steel

Corey Burton as Tungsten

Jim Ross as Jiross

Michael Buffer as Michauffer

Peter Linz as Heckler #1

Dave Goelz as Heckler #2

Nicki Minaj as Sugilite

--

Far from where the Crystal Gems were situated in the Ouroborium, the remaining Rutile Rebels had been given their own quarters to rest before they were sent out into the Contest of Champions to fight. While everybody was conversing among themselves about battle strategies and how they could use the contest to their advantage, Andesine was sitting in silence, her hands clasped together as she sat contemplating their current situation before Cinnabar walked over to her. "Andesine, is something bothering you?"

"As a matter of fact, there is," Andesine said as she got up and made an announcement. "It's about Black Rutile! For months on end, her leadership has proven to grow more inept the more time she spent on Earth, but now she just up and abandons us to be abducted by these Snake People! And when she finally comes for us, she teams up with Steven of all people! STEVEN!"

"Actually, I believe they call themselves Slytherohphidians." Eyeball corrected Andesine. "Though I highly doubt you care."

"You're right, I don't," Andesine said. "What I do care about is that she is no longer fit to lead us, which is why I nominate myself to take her place! I have the centuries of experience, the tenacity, the manipulativeness, and the best army I could ever have at my side!" The rebel Gems began cheering for their new leader. "That's what I needed to hear!"

"But what about me, Andesine?" Cinnabar asked the bigger Gem. "I'm just as experienced as you, plus I was Black Rutile's apprentice back in the day!"

"You certainly display your fair share of good leadership qualities, but your numerous failures against those Pearls say otherwise," Andesine replied with a hand on Cinnabar's shoulder. "I on the other hand managed to deceive those Gems into believing I surrendered, and they fell for my lies hook, line, and sinker!"

"Anyone else cares to debate?" Howlite challenged the Rutile Rebels.

"You know, now that I think about it, Andesine is a way better leader than what Black Rutile has become." Aquamarine realized. "I will follow you to the ends of the galaxy, the universe even!"

"Let's hear it for the Andesine Armada!" Amber hollered, prompting the other members of the newly renamed rebellion to start cheering for their new leader.

"ALL HAIL ANDESINE, ALL HAIL ANDESINE, ALL HAIL ANDESINE!" the Andesine Armada chanted in jubilation while Andesine ate it all up, and Cinnabar was left worrying if the attention would get to her head.

--

Outside in the Ouroborium, the crowds began cheering as Lapis was the next Crystal Gem to be forced to fight for her life, though she didn't put up much of a fight as she had to be picked up off her feet and carted into the arena.

"It's looking to be an exciting matchup, sports fans!" the commentator Jiross exclaimed as the arena transformed into a landscape that was freezing cold on one side and hellishly hot on the other. "In this corner, we have a Lapis Lazuli all the way from Earth! This is one tough cookie you don't want to mess with because her opponent is none other than the Magman Envyrno!"

"Okay, fire and water? Do you want me to lose?!" Envyrno yelled as she was dropped on the fire side of the arena. "Very well then, I can work with this." She then transformed into her Escafil disguise and scampered towards Lapis before clawing at the Gem's face. "Hahaha, my standard form may be my greatest weakness, but it has other uses too!"

"Why don't you put them to use, huh?" Lapis smirked before she spread her wings and flew towards the Ouroborium's sky dome.

"You got it!" Envyrno shouted as she grew wings on her back and yelled "LUUUUUUNCHTIIIIME!" The fight quickly turned into an aerial battle between the two fliers as they launched their respective elements at each other like cannonballs, with Lapis conjuring water from her wings while Envyrno drew lava from her own body and her side of the arena.

"Ooh, looks like we got a real dogfight here, folks!" Michauffer cried out as Lapis and Envyrno duked it out, spreading water and fire across the arena that either drenched their audience or set them on fire. "Which one will be yelling man down by the end of the match?!"

"Woo, this is the most fun I've had in ages!" Envyrno yelled as she tried to take Lapis down. "Haven't had this much of a blast since I was captured by these snake pricks!"

"Then why haven't you bothered escaping?!" Lapis yelled back while trying to throw water bombs at Envyrno.

"Because why cut the fun I'm having here short?!" Envyrno cackled. "Getting to incinerate all these unlucky schmucks for their amusement brings me so much joy! I think I may have wiped out a few last of some species too!"

"You're completely insane!" Lapis yelled and formed a spear of water to try and stab her fiery opponent with.

"I know you are, but what am I?!" Envyrno yelled through gritted teeth before trying to take a bite out of Lapis's face, only to suddenly get stabbed in the torso by the water spear before she could pull it off. As the lava composing her body rapidly began to cool, Envyrno felt herself getting heavier, meaning she was about to fall towards the ground. "Really couldn't resist taking me by surprise when I wasn't looking, huh?"

"No hard feelings, I hope." Lapis apologized as Envyrno turned from lava to stone and she dropped to the ice side of the arena, shattering upon impact to the jubilation of the masses as Lapis descended to the broken remains of the Magman. "Oh no, did I kill her?!"

"No, we Magmen actually can regenerate our bodies after a couple of hours," Envyrno whispered to Lapis, even though her mouth was in stone pieces. "But let's just say you killed me since that'll keep the audience happy."

Indeed, Lapis looked around at the cheering throngs of Slytherophidians who were excited to see that one of the Crystal Gems had finally taken a life, while Steven and Peridot looked ashamed that their friend would do something like this. Although Lapis appreciated the applause as she departed the arena with Envyrno's remains in hand.

--

For the next fight, Peridot was forced into the arena to fight Titanium. Even though Titanium was far larger and stronger than Peridot, the fact that he was a Metal made Peridot very confident that she would win. "This will be too easy, I can control metal with my powers! You stand no chance!"

"Do not believe power over my people will earn you victory, little Peridot." Titanium coolly stated while preparing an ion blaster to fire with. "I have been fighting battles for thousands of years, and you will find that I have acquired a particular set of skills over my long military career." He pointed the cannon at Peridot. "Shall I give an example?"

"Okay, that does it!" Peridot yelled. "This should be about as far as I go! If there was ever a time to run for the hills, this is it!" Scampering away as fast as her little body could go, Peridot nimbly dodged every blast Titanium fired at her with his ion blaster. When she proved too fast for him to shoot, Titanium decided to get up close and personal by throwing the blaster away and brandishing an axe instead.

"Okay, now you're just being unfair!" Peridot said as she held her hands out to try and defend herself, only to reflexively push Titanium away from her and into the stands. "Oh my stars, I did it! I won!"

"Well done Peridot, now finish it." Titanium said as he got up and let his guard down, followed by the audience chanting "FINISH HIM! FINISH HIM! FINISH HIM!"

"No, I don't want to," Peridot said. "Besides, I'm way too tiny to land the killing blow!"

"Well, you heard it here, folks, Peridot has an actually pretty justifiable reason to object to killing her opponent." Michauffer declared as the audience muttered in reluctant agreement.

"Well, this is intriguing." King Cobralan said to himself as Titanium allowed Peridot to walk onto his metallic hand.

"You're quite the interesting Gem, Peridot." Titanium complimented his opponent while walking away with Peridot by his side. "You're so small, yet you carry so much potential as well."

"I am also a genius without much competition." Peridot bragged with a laugh. "But I'll be honest, I was in way over my head on this one. I wasn't even sure if I was strong enough to face you in combat."

"It's okay Peridot, I was a little unsure of myself too, but I knew deep down I could make a new friend." Titanium smiled. "You are who you choose to be, little one."

--

Garnet and Amethyst were the next two Crystal Gems to be forced into the fight, this time in a two-versus-two matchup between the alien cowboys of Sergione-29, Sheriff Spiegel, and Deputy Edward. "It's high noon." Garnet declared while adjusting her shades.

"Two against two? Seems like pretty even odds." Sheriff Spiegel said while loading his gun.

"You're not the first members of your kind we faced," Deputy Edward added with a smirk. "so try and keep up, little ladies."

"Only if you plan on doing so, too." Garnet confidently replied before dodging a bullet from Sheriff Spiegel by simply tilting her head to the side. The bullet didn't even do so much as to leave a dent in her hair.

"Don't forget about me!" Amethyst said as she spin-dashed straight into Edward's shins, causing him to fall over and lose his gun in the process. "What in blazes?!"

"Surprise!" Amethyst yelled before turning her head into a crocodile and clamping her jaws around Edward's head. "Jazz hands!" she added with a pair of jazz hands.

"What did I just witness?" Sheriff Spiegel asked before Garnet took him by surprise and punched him in the back of the head. "Oh, wise guy, eh?!" he yelled before firing more bullets at Garnet, but she deflected them with her gauntlets. "Dammit!"

"Someone get this thing offa me!" Deputy Edward scrambled around the arena in panic with Amethyst continuing to bite on his head. "Seriously, we deserve more of a challenge than this!"

"If it's a challenge you want, then a challenge you'll get." Garnet calmly boasted while making her gemstones shine. "Amethyst, to me!"

"Uh, okay then!" Amethyst said as she turned her head to normal before diving into Garnet's arms, and the two fused into Sugilite, standing proud and boastful over the two cowboys.

"HOLY GUACAMOLE, WE GOT ANOTHER FUSION UP IN THIS HOUSE!" Jiross yelled excitedly as the audience began cheering for Sugilite.

"Who be jammin' now?!" Sugilite laughed loudly.

"YOU BE JAMMIN' NOW!" the spectators chanted as Sugilite proceeded to curb-stomp Spiegel and Edward like no tomorrow. "FINISH THEM! FINISH THEM! FINISH THEM!"

"You really had to open your big mouth, didn't you Ed?!" Spiegel said as Sugilite's beatdown continued.

"What, would you rather I get my head bitten off?!" Edward yelled back when it seemed like the pummeling finally stopped.

"Eh, I'm bored," Sugilite said before walking away from the arena, satisfied by what she's done.

"Well, at least we didn't die," Edward said as he got up and straggled away from the arena.

"No, just our bodies and spirits are broken," Spiegel replied while struggling to stand back up. "Hey, can you be a pal and pick me up? I think my legs are broken."

--

"Alright Ronaldo, you've been preparing your whole life for this!" Ronaldo hyped himself up as he was next to be forced out into the arena. Unlike everyone else though, he was excited to fight for his life for the Slytherophidians' entertainment. With a bronze chest plate over his shirt and a katana blade he got at an anime convention, the conspiracy theorist was more than ready for his big moment.

"Well, look what we have here, a human dares to step up to challenge some of the universe's finest!" Jiross said as Ronaldo strutted into the arena with a cocky swagger.

"Humans, huh? How do they do it?" the first heckler wondered aloud.

"How do they do what?" the second heckler asked his friend.

"How do they manage to stay alive after all these eons?" the first heckler replied, his one-liner causing the two to laugh uproariously.

"ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!" Ronaldo yelled at his arms in the air before presenting his sword to the masses. "This sword is a replication of the Shining Finger sword from the hit anime series Mobile Home Warrior Gatha, used by its titular protagonist in his fight against evil superpowered land developers trying to destroy his trailer park home, and I shall use it in his name!"

"Don't get too cocky, because here comes your opponent now!" Jiross declared as the Decimator stomped into view, blades at the ready to fight Ronaldo despite their vast difference in size. "Careful, he bites!"

"Hm, excuse me, little boy, are you supposed to be my opponent?" the Decimator asked snidely while bending over to look down at Ronaldo.

"Yes, I am Ronaldo, the greatest warrior that Earth has ever known!" Ronaldo boasted while throwing double peace signs into the air. "Songs have been written about my legendary adventures, and once I am done here, I shall go down in this planet's history!"

The Decimator didn't say anything in response to Ronaldo's audacious bravado. He had faced many opponents who were too big for their britches before, but this single human with a sword the giant was convinced may not even be real took the cake. Rather than simply using his chained blades, the Decimator attacked Ronaldo by kicking him into the wall. "You have got to be joking."

Upon realizing just what he was up against, Ronaldo let out a shriek of terror and quickly began running back to the inside of the Ouroborium, terrified of the Decimator's sheer might even though he was only dealt a fraction of it. "There is no way my luck is that bad!"

"What are you doing, Ronaldo?!" the voice of Peedee shouted for his older brother, much to Ronaldo's surprise as he looked to the stands to see his little brother among the crowd of snake people who were now laughing at Ronaldo's expense. "Get back in there and fight!"

"Are you kidding me?! This guy is huge!" Ronaldo exclaimed, pointing at the Decimator, who hadn't moved an inch, behind him. "Plus, what the heck are you doing here?"

"I'll explain later, just get back in there and-" Peedee tried to reply, but Ronaldo was already running for his life. "And he's gone."

"Well, that was a pretty good halftime show." King Cobralan proclaimed, trying his hardest to remain composed despite the humorous situation he just witnessed. "I must admit, that Ronaldo is a very interesting fellow. Maybe we should see what the other humans have to offer."

--

"And for our next battle, we got another two versus two match!" Jiross announced as Cinnabar and Andesine arrived on the field of battle. Cinnabar unsheathed her broadsword and pointed it at Captain Gearfeet and Rigby Starglow. Andesine meanwhile struck a pose as she pulled her flaming sword out of her gem.

"Well, don't hesitate on my account!" Andesine grinned evilly as Rigby retaliated by trying to smack Andesine in the face with his guitar. "Oh, what fun! What fun!" she cackled before slicing the guitar in two with her sword.

"Oh, bugger!" Rigby muttered as the Starman raised his legs and began fighting in a capoeira-like style, his calves clashing with Andesine's burning blade while Cinnabar contended with Gearfeet.

"This reminds me of the time I fought for my soul at Davy Jones' Black Hole!" Gearfeet reminisced on previous adventures as his sword, now taking the place of his detachable metallic left hand, collided with Cinnabar's own. "Or when I took on Starbeard for the legendary treasure of Sil V. Erman!"

"As much as I'd love to hear more of your adventures, they are not important right now!" Cinnabar yelled as she got down low and sliced one of Gearfeet's namesake gears for feet off of his leg, leaving him disabled and stumbling over.

"Oh dangit, that was my favorite leg!" Gearfeet complained as he struggled to get back up and started hopping on his remaining leg. "But I won't go down that easily!"

"Oh, will you?" Cinnabar said before grabbing at Gearfeet's sword arm and ripping it off with her bare hands, not even bothering to use her sword again because she was that confident in her abilities. "Looks like you've been disarmed! Get it? Disarmed?"

"I'm invincible!" Gearfeet bragged while continuing to hop on one foot and angrily shaking his remaining fist at Cinnabar.

"You're a looney." Cinnabar shook her head in disgust before turning to Andesine, who was more or less evenly matched with Rigby Starglow.

"For a celebrity, you're actually quite skilled." Andesine complimented her opponent as her sword seared through Rigby's garish costume and his pompadour hairdo.

"Oy, watch the bod, babe!" Rigby yelled as he was literally down on his last legs before being taken down with a searing hot slash to the back. That was when the chanting started again.

"FINISH THEM! FINISH THEM! FINISH THEM!" the Slytherophidian audience ordered Cinnabar and Andesine, who were all too happy to comply with the spectators' requests had it not been for Rigby's quick thinking.

"Oh geez, it hurts." Rigby groaned as he struggled to get up from his debilitating injury and picked up the disabled pirate captain's body. "It's like ashes to ashes all up in here!"

"Hey, thanks for the lift, Rig." Gearfeet thanked Rigby as he limped their way away from the two Gems. "Big fan of your work by the way. Can you sign my replacement leg?"

"For you, Cap'n? Anything." Rigby smiled at Gearfeet as they successfully escaped. Although Cinnabar and Andesine didn't successfully kill their opponents, they still found this a victory anyhow.

"I guess you are more worthy as a leader after all," Cinnabar said to Andesine as the two Gems walked away arm in arm. "Allow me to call yourself your second in command."

"Thank you Cinnabar, that means the world to me," Andesine replied, passing by a very jealous Aquamarine as the duo reveled in their triumph.

--

Meanwhile, Black Rutile was treated to a visit to Prince Nosiop's chambers in the Jormagundr family's royal palace. As expected of a prince, the room was extraordinarily lavish, but there was an air of cynicism and desire Black Rutile could sense in the quarters. "Nice place you have here."

"Thank you, my father before me had this room, and his father before him, and so on," Nosiop said while gazing at a portrait of a king cobra much like King Cobralan. "This is a portrait of my ancestor, King Serpentes I, the original ruler of Serpentes whom our planet was named after."

"Quite the family resemblance." Black Rutile smirked in amusement. "He was the one who started this Contest of Champions, didn't he?"

"Indeed, and every king of Serpentes after him continued that tradition," Nosiop explained. "I'm expected to keep it going once I ascend to the throne, but I have far bigger plans than that incompetent fool I call a father who'd rather keep the people entertained than listen to the good ideas I have!"

"I can relate so much, my friend." Black Rutile agreed with the Slytherophidian prince. "I have so many good ideas on how to improve Gem society, but I'm always treated as the villain while everyone bends the knee to some brat who literally threw the mother of all tantrums to get his way!"

"It truly delights me to see a fellow misunderstood genius," Nosiop said while taking Black Rutile's hands and gazing into her eyes. "Come, let us restore our races together and depose that moronic despot!"

"I'll agree to anything you say." Black Rutile replied eagerly. "But first, we'll need to make a few arrangements first."

--

"Ladies and gentlemen, here comes what will no doubt be one of the biggest events in Contest of Champions history!" Michauffer yelled as the Diamonds were next to be brought into the arena. "On this side of the arena, we have White, Yellow, and Blue Diamond, all the way from the Gem Homeworld!" The spectators immediately booed the three Diamonds. "I can see who everyone wants to lose already. And on this side, it's Tungsten, Chromium, and Steel of the Mighty Metals!"

"So it has come to this, I see." Tungsten mused as he, Chromium, and Steel were brought into the arena as well. "We promise to go easy on you, Diamonds. But if you slay us here and now, it will mean war."

"We'll make good on that promise," White smirked before giving her orders. "Diamonds, attack!" As the fight began with Yellow and Blue Diamond fighting Chromium and Steel, the two trios of monarchs all recollected the first time they signed the Ferrum Accords centuries ago.

--

"And so, we enact the Ferrum Accords." Steel declared as he, the other Metals, and the Diamonds all finished signing what would one day become the Ferrum Accords. "With this bill, neither side shall engage each other in combat in any circumstances that will end in fatality. Otherwise, it will mean another war between our planets, winner take all."

"So glad we were able to reach an agreement, Metals," Yellow replied. "We've already wasted enough valuable resources on this silly war as is."

"And we've wasted enough time talking to you as is!" Chromium yelled angrily. "We've lost numerous planets to you, but Budiansky-84 was where we crossed the line!"

"Chromium, no needless antagonizing." Steel tried to calm his brother down.

"Ignore my two youngers here, we hope you shall honor our little agreement here," Tungsten said to the Diamonds.

"We shall make sure of that, Tungsten." Blue Diamond nodded. "Cross our hearts."

--

Back in the present day, despite the Diamonds being far more powerful, the Metals were far more durable and resistant to their attacks. White fired lasers from her eyes at Tungsten, but he practically shrugged them off while slashing at her legs with his swords.

"Please, don't let this start another war!" Blue urged the Metals as she was brought to her knees by Chromium.

"If it's a war you want, then a war you shall get!" Chromium said eagerly as he fired his laser cannon at Blue's gem, poofing her instantly.

"Chromium, you're out of line!" Steel chided his comrade while fighting Yellow, who was suddenly taken out by Chromium's cannon without even a fight.

"You said this wouldn't start a war!" White gasped as she saw her sisters be taken down to the excitement of the Diamonds' defeat.

"Why? This is way too easy! You've all gotten soft since Era 3 began!" Chromium laughed.

"Chromium, don't do it!" Tungsten yelled as Chromium jumped up and struck White in the head with his cannon, poofing her instantly and causing the crowd to chant.

"FINISH THEM! FINISH THEM! FINISH THEM!" the Slytherophidians chanted more vigorously than ever, eager to see the Diamonds finally get their karma while Tungsten and Steel tried to keep Chromium from shattering them.

"Come on, let me give them one crack!" Chromium exclaimed as he struggled to get out. Unfortunately for him, some Slytherophidians dove into the arena in the nick of time and dragged the Diamonds' gems away in large stretchers.

--

"Did they just poof the Diamonds?!" Pearl barked in alarm at what the Crystal Gems just saw.

"Well, we're boned," Jasper added defeatedly.

"What do we do now?" White Topaz asked, terrified of what could be to come for them.

"Simple, we keep fighting until we can get to the bottom of this," Steven said boldly. "Anyone else with me?"

"I am." Connie declared.

"Count me in too," Greg answered hopefully.

"And me, even though I utterly suck at this!" Ronaldo yelled.

"At least you're honest about this," Peedee replied with his arms folded.

"That reminds me, what are you doing here?" Peridot asked Peedee.

"Dad told me to sneak onboard that snake person's ship to keep an eye on Ronaldo," Peedee answered. "I'm surprised nobody noticed me until now, but I guess all that time watching Iron Gear Solid cutscenes on TubeTube taught me a lot about stealth."

"That would explain everything." Bismuth nodded.

--

"Oohohohohoho, I haven't had this much fun since driving Steven to his breaking point!" Black Rutile cackled at what she just watched with Nosiop and Pyth. "It's always so invigorating to see the people I hate get utterly humiliated, especially after how the Diamonds tried to hide how much organic life they extinguished."

"So, what shall we do now?" Pyth asked Black Rutile.

"Now, we go and see some old friends of mine." Black Rutile sneered, knowing just who she was talking about.

--

Well, if the Diamonds were taken out that easily and not because I kind of rushed this to meet my personal deadline, then there's no telling how the Crystal Gems will fare in the rest of the games. What do Black Rutile and Nosiop have planned together? Tune in next time to find out!