#augh and cleanup

[atomicjellycat]

"Go get some ice"

Meant you were going on a JOURNEY through time and space. Endless backroom corridors, random liminal space hallways, and an abandoned staircase to get to the one tiny ""kitchen"" that happens to have an ice machine, one dirty sink, and a microwave from 1952

Tips for writing those gala scenes, from someone who goes to them occasionally:

Generally you unbutton and re-button a suit coat when you sit down and stand up.

You’re supposed to hold wine or champagne glasses by the stem to avoid warming up the liquid inside. A character out of their depth might hold the glass around the sides instead.

When rich/important people forget your name and they’re drunk, they usually just tell you that they don’t remember or completely skip over any opportunity to use your name so they don’t look silly.

A good way to indicate you don’t want to shake someone’s hand at an event is to hold a drink in your right hand (and if you’re a woman, a purse in the other so you definitely can’t shift the glass to another hand and then shake)

Americans who still kiss cheeks as a welcome generally don’t press lips to cheeks, it’s more of a touch of cheek to cheek or even a hover (these days, mostly to avoid smudging a woman’s makeup)

The distinctions between dress codes (black tie, cocktail, etc) are very intricate but obvious to those who know how to look. If you wear a short skirt to a black tie event for example, people would clock that instantly even if the dress itself was very formal. Same thing goes for certain articles of men’s clothing.

Open bars / cash bars at events usually carry limited options. They’re meant to serve lots of people very quickly, so nobody is getting a cosmo or a Manhattan etc.

Members of the press generally aren’t allowed to freely circulate at nicer galas/events without a very good reason. When they do, they need to identify themselves before talking with someone.

[waitineedaname]

inside my brain is a slideshow of these panels of ritsu experiencing emotional torment

[americankimchi]

FUCK THIS FROG BASTARD FR

WHY DOES IT HAVE A ONESHOT ABILITY??? LIKE MY GUY!!! RELAX!!!!

[chiisana-lion]

"wow you really always do work fast no wonder you're [department head]'s favorite" girl im not even supposed to be doing concept and layout work at all

[oncillaphoenix]

the desperate desire to write s o many things now that i'm finally back in a place with a computer and a soft quiet spot. VS. being incoherently tired because i just got back from a trip and i only got ~3hrs of sleep last night

[beandogg]

cool twitters two factor authentication is still broken so you just can’t fucking login

[executorz]

i forgot how much i love gardening but ouch my spine 😭

[melissa-titanium]

could actually genuinely watch this fucking scene over and over again its SO well animated & if you actually hear it and the dialogue without context its fucking hilarious like why is this kid losing his fucking mind over being told hes cool and normal . but its just so fucking good. i genuinely cant say i have a firm grasp on his character enough to properly analyze this scene with confidence but god its just. its so good. its SO GOOD. remembering shigeo when he was little being the last straw as well. fuckkkkk. kid whos been the perfect son perfect brother with perfect grades ever since the incident because he fully and sincerely believes if he lets that facade slip. if he lets his brother get upset. even for a second. he's putting himself and others into incredible danger. because unlike his brother, he has no special abilities of his own he cant defend himself. and hes THIRTEEN he has to manage that weight on his shoulders with no help from anyone else.

then. something something. after so long of hoping hoping hoping to get those abilities, putting himself in a position he despises just to make up for his perceived lack of self defense, he just. gets powers. powers that were supposedly lying dormant within him all his life. do you know how that must have felt? all of that festering, all of that fear was for NOTHING? i think. augh i dont have my thoughts about him cohesive enough to fucking say anything but just like. i dont know. ive seen one or two people be like LOL ritsu so overdramaticccccc in cleanup arc like NO dude when i was 13 i did something kinda similar i get him. i get him . my freakass little brother. thats just what it feels like. having to pack away such a traumatic event? something he experienced as a kid . must have been so much bigger in his eyes now. when youre small EVERYTHING is big to you. and he never quite grew out of seeing what shige did to him as something monumentally terrifyingly BIG. and it just festered and festered and festered and. i dont know. going way too deep into this rn but after building up SO. MUCH. RAGE. and all it comes out as is something arguably like. meager? it makes you fucking lose your absolute shit. i dont know if im making sense its 1 am bare with me dude. i really like ritsu i really like ritsu i think hes cool i GET him i promise i do i just cant articulate my thoughts on him. agggggggggggggh

[candyskiez]

oh would you look at that im thinking about ritsu again. who could’ve predicted this!

but yeah do you ever think about the kageyama brothers and trust. and how ritsu spent such a long time being afraid of mob that he forgot that shigeo was a Person instead of just an unstoppable terrifying Thing. and how neither shigeo nor ritsu Really trust anyone outside of a couple exceptions (i.e. each other, sorta, and also dimple for some reason, and shou for ritsu). how the resolution for them after the big cleanup/7th division arcs was not ritsu no longer being afraid but instead trusting that mob does not in fact hate or want to hurt ritsu, nor is he fragile enough for even extreme stress or provocation to change that? and then in the confession arc he finally trusts that shigeo is his brother and even just for a second they’re able to stand on level ground. explodes

SHAKES THIS BACK AND FORTH LIKE A MARACA. YES. ABSOLUTELY. I THINK ABOUT THIS ALL THE FUCKING TIME YOU DONT UNDERSTAND. AUGRHTHHF. SCREAMING. BANGING MY HEAD AGAINST THE WALL. ALL OF THIS. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT TO PROPERLY ADD. This is so good. Oh my god. Okay. Okay.

He can look back on his memories and go. No, there wasn't suddenly something Evil in my brother that came out to hurt me. He's a person. He is a person who was terrified and fucked up under fear, like I did. My brother is not perfect. My brother fucked up in an extreme way. And I am terrified of him. But he is a person. And I am mad at him. But he is a person. He can look the most terrifying parts of his brother in the eye and say, you are a person. You a part of my brother too. And I know I don't like you, but I can trust you now. Because I know it was an accident. I know you didn't mean to. I can see that now.

And I. Augh. Okay. It's the fact Ritsu felt like he had to sit and take it for so long or he'd make everything worse but then he realizes, wait. I am just doing the same thing I've done for years. Where did that get us. No. My brother doesn't want to hurt me. He will just be fucked up from it again. It won't help him. It'll bring us back to the start. And I'm so tired of being in pain. I'm so tired of this. I want to be a person too. I want to trust him again. I want to be happy again. I want it all to matter. I want to get better. And he finally stops being one of the personas he's playing, hes honest with his brother and he has AGENCY and he! Agh!

And the fact that what brought it on was seeing all the good memories they had before and going. No. I am not going back to being that afraid. I am not going back to being spineless. And I know my brother doesn't want to hurt me. Even the parts of him I don't like don't want to hurt me. Even the parts I'm afraid of don't want to hurt me. I am not going to be helpless this time. I am going to fix this. DO YOU UNDERSTAND. DO YOU HEAR ME. HELLO.

[ssobsinternallyy]

good morning, mikey!

May 7th, 2024. Approximately two years after K-Day.

It was foggy in Mikey's head that day.

He woke up and felt stuffed with cotton. Like some sort of dumb stuffed toy. He stared idly at his ceiling for a good three minutes, before throwing himself off his hammock. He landed on his plastron, and tried to use the nubs of his arms to push himself upright. When that didn't work, he tried his legs. 

Nope. Too sore. Mikey yawned, a soft orange glow emitting from his nubs as he used his mystic powers to hoist himself up. 

His "nubs" were the term he used to describe the arms that are not there anymore. It didn't really make Mikey that sad anymore, thinking about them. Just gave him more of an excuse to play with his mystic powers. Even if that's why he lost his arms in the first place

Hey, at least Mikey had an excuse. Raph and Donnie would be just as willing to lose a few limbs if it meant nobody dies. 

He summoned a hand and itched his snout. Maybe he should use his prosthetics today.. just in case.

Augh.. but that's SO MUCH WORK.... Mikey complained to himself. Not to mention you'd have to wake up Donnie to help you. Dr. Delicate Touch supplied not-so helpfully. DT wasn't really useful when it came to decision making.

So Mikey opted to just float around, a neat trick he picked up from Draxum. His prosthetics weren't even that heavy, but just thinking about them made Mikey want to fall over. Not to mention his legs were sore from patrol yesterday. Mikey forgot how important arms were when it came to balance. 

He was a little surprised to find CJ in the kitchen at.. wait what time was it? Mikey glanced at the clock. 9:45 AM. Huh.

"Mornin', CJ." Mikey greeted. CJ glanced backward, and gave an awkward little grin. "Good morning, Master!." 

Mikey chuckled. "I thought I said you could just call me Mikey?" CJ gave an awkward little laugh. "Sorry, Mikey." Mikey dismissed his apology with a wave of his hand. 

"Did you want help with breakfast? I- I woke up earlier than I usually do." CJ explained. Mikey groggily mumbled something into his hoodie, before stretching and nodding. He summoned two pairs of hands, and seated himself on a countertop to do his work.

"Can you grab the pancake batter?" Mikey instructed as he got started on Raph's eggs. Raph liked his eggs sunny side up. Just a little bit of salt, and add a bowl of fruit on the side. Cutting fruit with his mystic hands was always a hassle, maybe he'll have CJ do it.

CJ had the pancake batter in hand, and waited patiently for Mikey. Mikey snorted. "You know how to make pancakes, Case, I taught you this." CJ's face flushed a little, and he laughed. "Yeah, uhm, I'll get started on that."

It was always fun having CJ around. He had been teetering between staying in the Lair, staying at April's apartment, and bunking with Cassandra and her girlfriend. The Hamato Clan just sort of decidedthat they shared custody over the guy. Mikey found it funny to think about. What's one more older brother figure in Mikey's life, anyway?

CJ turned around and got started on the pancakes. Mikey had taught him to make them the way Mikey had made them. His pancakes were always undoubtedly delicious, but Casey's replica of them were a very close runner-up. 

Mikey finished Raph's eggs, sliding them onto a plate. He opened a cupboard on the highest shelf and fished around for Raph's favorite mug.

One small bonus about mystic hands is that you don't have to worry about being too short or too weak. Pickle jars and high cabinets have never been easier to open!

He snagged it and pulled it back down. "Hey, Case. I watch pancakes and you cut fruit? Remember, Raph likes his banana chips cut pretty thick. And add strawberries in there too, I think April just bought us some."

CJ nodded, and they switched positions. Cooking with CJ was always relaxing. He knew what to do, and asked questions if he didn't. 

Unlike Leo, who, if he didn't know, just assumed. He's costed Mikey hours of kitchen cleanup. Raph had to honest-to-god BAN Leo from the kitchen, cause Mikey was seconds away from a meltdown. 

The sliding of mechanical doors knocked Mikey out of his head. He turned from where he was moving pancakes onto a plate and smiled. "Mornin', Dee!" 

Donnie murmured an unintelligible greeting, and plopped into a seat. Crap, Mikey forgot about his coffee!

"Agh- Your coffee isn't ready yet, sorry Don!" Mikey chirped, floating to the coffee machine. 

Most people assume that with Donnie's autism, he would like his coffee smooth and creamy. But Donnie actually liked the bitterness of black coffee. 

Mikey started the coffee machine and made a quick pit stop to check on CJ, who flashed him a thumbs up. Mikey smiled, using his mystic hands to flash CJ his own little thumbs up. He glanced at the clock, and looked around. Leo wasn't awake, and he needed to take his meds.

Crap, DONNIE has to take his meds. 

"Don, I know you don't like them, but..." Mikey "grabbed" a prescription bottle that they had gotten from a Hidden City doctor, and slid it across the counter towards Donnie. Donnie grumbled, pushing it away. Mikey put two assertive hands on his hips. "I'll get Raph." He warned, pushing Donnie's coffee into his hands. Donnie rolled his eyes, sipping his coffee.

"You wouldn't." Donnie challenged, but Mikey already had his phone out. Donnie groaned, quickly pushing the pills into his mouth and taking a long swig of his coffee. Mikey smiled. "See? Not so hard."

Donnie grumbled. Satisfied, Mikey went off to hunt for his next victim. 

"Rise and shine, Leo!" Mikey used his foot to kick open the curtained entrance to his blue clad brother's room. Leo let out a sleep chirr, lifting his head up. 

"Hnnnngghhh.. Mikey...." Leo pouted, chucking a throw pillow at him. Mikey dodged it, swiftly using his foot to grab it. He balanced, and using all of his weight, spun around and threw the pillow back. 

Mikey was successful in aiming at Leo, but he lost his balance and toppled over. He collided with the floor with an unsatisfying bonk. 

"Aughh...." Mikey groaned. Leo watched from his bed with a smug grin. "Karma." He sneered. Mikey hissed at him. "Help me up, you blue goofball." 

Leo took his sweet time putting on his knee braces. Striding over to Mikey, Leo nudged him lightly with his toe. Mikey tried to bite him, but missed.

"Woah, fiesty, are we?" Leo laughed, bending over and plucking his little brother off the ground. He grinned, throwing him over his shoulder. Mikey exploded into a fit of laughter. 

"Put me daHAHAWN!" Mikey squealed. Leo liked listening to Mikey laugh. It was probably the best noise in the world. Leo let out a dramatic yawn. "Nah."  He decided, carefully limping into the kitchen. 

"Good morning, Donald, Casey Junior." Leo sing-songed, plopping Mikey onto the counter. Mikey snorted, using his foot to lightly kick the back of Leo's head. The slider turned dramatically, gasping. "My own brother! Betrayal!"

"Deserved." Donnie snorted. Leo let out an exaggerated sob, draping himself dramatically onto CJ. "Double betrayal! Are you seeing this, Casey?!"

CJ laughed, crumbling slightly under Leo's weight. "Sensei!"

A low rumble escaped Raph's room, and Mikey lit up. "Raph's awake!" He cheered. The thump of Mikey's feet were two times as fast as Raph's slow stomping, and Mikey was circling Raph like a happy dog in under a few seconds. Donnie pulled out his phone. "Huh. It took three whole seconds for Mikey, upon discovery that he was awake, dart over to Raph."

"That's a new record, baby bro!" laughed Leo, leaning over Donnie's shoulder to look at the phone.  Raph glanced up, confused. "You guys have been keeping track?"

"Data collection is my craft, Raphael." Donnie stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Raph rolled his eyes playfully, grabbing Mikey by the rim of his shell and plopping him onto his shoulder. Mikey leaned his weight onto Raph's head and used his legs to support himself. 

Using Raph as a jungle gym is hard now that Mikey's arms were MIA, but Mikey managed. He always managed. 

That's what Leo always admired about Mikey. His ability to adapt. Mikey hadn't exactly welcomed disability with open arms (pun intended), but he took it in stride. 

And seeing his little brother bursting with joy, eating breakfast with his family, Leo was reminded about just how lucky he was. That Mikey saved his life, that his brothers were alive and here. 

Even if Dad wasn't with them. 

Leo missed his father a lot. Their father had a troubling time raising them, and sure, they fought sometimes, but he loved his sons. More than anything else. 

And as their family grew closer, Splinter's health started declining. 

It was subtle at first, but it grew worse over time. And then one day, Splinter's chest spasmed in the kitchen, and he died on the floor, right in front of Mikey and Leo.

Leo didn't like thinking about what he had lost. It didn't make him feel too hot.

"Leo!" Mikey's voice rang in his ears. Leo hummed, turning around. His three brothers and CJ looked at him worriedly.

"Sensei, are you okay?" CJ asked. Leo smiled. "Yeah, I am. Just spaced out." Mikey nodded. Raph reached over and rubbed Leo's head. He laughed. 

Mikey took a final bite of his pancake, and smiled. 

It didn't get much better than this.

[pagerunner-j]

love suddenly getting a barrage of five emails in a row about my SSN being found on the dark web

right as I'm trying to go out the door

always the sort of thing that lifts the mood

It was, of course, about the National Public Data breach, which from the sounds of it fucked over absolutely everybody, because billions of records got exposed. I've already been subject to so many identity theft attempts as it is that my credit's been frozen for over a decade, I've got passcodes and additional security all over the place, and there's not much else I can do. I'm still exhausted and angry about it all, and I'm sick of being stuck playing cleanup thanks to companies that can't keep their shit together, and WHY DOES THIS KEEP GETTING WORSE? augh.

(P.S. This sentence I read in an article about it is weirdly hilarious, in a gallows humor sort of way: "This breach is expected to trigger approximately 170 million dark web alerts in the coming weeks, likely leading to a substantial increase in participant calls to Experian’s call center; this influx of call volume may result in longer wait times.")

[searching-for-synpathy]

Every night i go “augh i cant deal with dinner cleanup right now ill do it tomorrow” and every morning i go “theres NO WAY ill EVER finish these dirty dinner dishes i dont know how to go on 😭” and every evening it takes like. 15 minutes maximum. Closer to 5-10.

[mitch-petrol]

did you tell tread about pride month already?

uhhh no not yet… I was more focused on convincing him to do the tread pride flag cleanup and apologizing for stealing his phone… I’ll tell him tomorrow though!! Probably. I mean- I want to!! sorta. kinda. AUGH

Look look it’s just- how do I even start that conversation?? That I lied to him for a whole half month and egged him on? And besides that- a part of me still thinks it’s really funny… like if I just keep him in check and clean up his/my mess it’s harmless honestly! I don’t know I don’t know, does that make me an asshole?

Maybe I’ll tell him Monday… after I get a chance to talk to my band mates in person…

[fighting-these-demons]

Continued Liveblogging

Good on Manami for being sweet and trying to lift Onoda's spirits. Giving voice to faith he may not have or is actively building in that moment as he's coming to terms with and letting go of their opportunity to race while Onoda's faith is faltering.

Teshima sending Prince Imaizumi in for cleanup and to reunite them with Naruko.

Onoda hasn't had time to adjust Teshima! Give him a minute! Damn! 😭

If you let him get adjusted first he can bounce back but if you throw him in mid-spiral it'll be a problem!

Dang I feel bad for Onoda. He really wanted to race Manami. 💔

Augh 😫🤮 First Name????

I am happy for Onodanami shippers. Those are some Quality Moments! Even if I don't enjoy them.

DJEIDNDJDJSJSNSN

IMAIZUMI

WHOMST ARE YOU TO BE TALKING ABOUT NEXT TIME???????? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

You wholesale slapped your senior's arm away earlier! 😂

He's doing so well though good for him! He's offering commiseration and comfort.

Yaaaaaaaaay 🎉🎉🎉🎉 Imaizonoda Confession Time!!!!! 💖💖💖 (sort of. Every time Imaizumi gets earnest the meaning completely flies over Onoda's head 💔)

Not Midousuji saying Naruko Isn't Gross! 😣

Well, at least he's managed to force Midousuji to respect him on some level. ✌ He can truly do anything! Sohoku's All Star All Rounder Naruko Shoukichi!

🙄 Midousuji's ~I'm just letting you be here~ as if he doesn't do everything he can to get ahead of his opponents all the time and Naruko's managed to stick to them anyway.

GET EM NARUKO!!!!! 💥💥💥💥💥

That's a hell of a point for team Naruzumi! 😂🎉🎉🎉 Precious!

Izumida was clearly holding the Braincell that afternoon practice.

It really is cute how they decided to mimic the captain and vice captains haircuts.

[vergess]

An adult human in my vicinity went for ADHD dx. She had a call that had a lot of standard ND screening questions and got a prescription for both Wellbutrin and Zoloft, and told that she needed acomputer test for a proper diagnosis and actual ADHD meds, plus blood work. Is that normal? Do you know anything about antidepressants and ADHD?

I mean, it's definitely normal, yes. Whether it's good is much more debateable.

But it's extremely normal, because we live in a fuckign hellscape and the government in this country likes to arbitrarily gatekeep life saving medications like pain relief and stimulants to prove they're "tough on drugs" even though it literally makes the problems of addiction, street drugs, and overdose related death much much much MUCH WORSE.

/ahem

Anyway, it's very normal for a medical practice to either say outright "we don't treat ADHD here at all sorry" or to put access to stimulants behind a bunch of weird obtrusive hoops. For example, I have to go to my doctor every three months for a physical, a mental health screening, and to sign a stupid fucking contract that says I'm Contributing To Society In The Legally Mandated Ways before I am allowed to get the medicine that literally allows me to feed myself or clean my own body.

The computer screening in particular sounds Very Legit to me, because a lot of the time they're going to end up using the same diagnostic exam you can fucking take online, but monitoring you while you do. Advise your friend to always describe their most extreme ADHD symptoms when taking the screener. If they've ever "forgotten an important work task" she needs to put that she constantly forgets them, like the maximum fucking amount. Stuff like that.

Okay the actual question now.

Wellbutrin+Zoloft is a common enough treatment for ADHD when your doctor is averse to stimulants for whatever reason. In a normal society, this would be "because you have a history of heart problems or have tried stimulants and found them unhelpful," but we don't live in that world. It's what's called a second-line treatment, which basically means it's supposed to be tried second, after first-line (stimulants) have failed.

ADHD is generally believed at this point to be a fault in the way neurotransmitters bind to neurons in the brain. They take 'too long' to bind, and end up getting cleaned up instead of transmitting their message. Since the cleanup system is being constantly triggered, you also make less of these neurotransmitters since there's an apparent oversupply. (This is a WILD oversimplification)

Stimulants cause you to make more neurotransmitters, bringing production up high enough that the transmitters have a chance to bind before the overzealous cleanup systems eat them.

Wellbutrin slows down the cleanup process of one neurotransmitter (noradrenaline, I believe). Zoloft slows down the cleanup of a different one (serotonin). So, they're often prescribed in concert.

But, they literally cannot help you produce more neurotransmitters so they fundamentally have limited overall utility in ADHD. Not no utility. Plenty of people who cannot take stimulants find this combination adequate to live with.

But in almost all cases stimulants will work fucking better.

The fact that our goddamn War On Drugs bullshit has made it this difficult to get them is disgusting and is also specifically the fault of Joseph Robinet Biden, who takes great personal PRIDE in having created this medically destructive hellscape during his pre-presidential career and now seems to take great joy in doing nothing to clean up his own goddamn mess.

Okay so!

Yes, SSRIs, NDRIs, and other reuptake inhibitors (cleanup slowdowners) are definitely An Option for ADHD, but they're SUPPOSED TO BE A SECONDARY OPTION FOR A FUCKING REASON AUGH

ETA: You can also be prescribed secondline treatments in addition to firstline ones, if you for example need stronger management of symptoms, etc etc there's a lot of nuance this is a rage fuelled over simplification.

[infiniteoreos]

i love the big cleanup arc and the divine tree arc and both ritsu nd mob getting carried away and dimple having the exact opposite role in it augh when the parallels