#at the end it's pretty loud
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ever since i clicked on a furry cosplayer on youtube, it won't leave my head..
i apologize for this.
this was a mistake.
i'm never going back am i?
i'm stuck like this forever. :")
no hate to any of you furries out there! <3
and no. that is not my voice. :/
source: https://youtube.com/shorts/jD_2wlL9xOY?feature=share
#mod#gacha#gacha neon#gacha mod#furry#furry oc#gacha furry#is that a thing???#now it is#gacha video#capcut#tw loud#kind of#at the end it's pretty loud#i'm a furry now aren't i?#oh well#i'm not kidding every time i see a furry video my instant reaction is to tap on it and watch it!!#even my friend from high school told me that i'm a furry!!!#:")#this is my life now#no hate btw
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Recently had a silly Handplates dream where Papyrus was trying to snoop around Gaster and Alphys’ lab, but didn’t know who Alphys was and so was trying to pass it off as his own lab lol (Patreon)
#Doodles#Dream log#UT#Handplates#Papyrus#Gaster#Sans#Alphys#And also he was Big Brother Papyrus to a babybones Sans lol#I doodled them as close to the dream as possible so if it's silly or doesn't make sense take it up with my subconscious lol#I remember Gaster had a reputation for being very charming and charismatic which ?? Sure okay lol#He was also quite smiley - personally I read that as him putting on a face to the public but even that seems out of character for him lol#Everyone else was pretty much as usual - Alphys small and nervous and Papyrus loud and bombastic#I don't remember what exactly he was looking for - doubly weird 'cause I hadn't reread him and Sans exploring yet! :0#Just of them moving into their house - though I did read a bunch just before sleeping so safe to say I can attribute that lol#This was the only really clear part of the dream - the rest was just scrolling scrolling scrolling pages and pages of comic panels#Can't imagine why lol#Also intercut with some of the poses I ended up doodling before - surprise! They were dream doodles lol#Also in case it's not clear - Alphys was Very Much Present while Papyrus was trying to pass himself off as the name on the door lol#Oh yeah I'm pretty sure he was also speaking in WingDings thus why Alphys didn't immediately call him out lol#The room was quite cute actually - not at all the sterile grey of the True Lab#Warm and wooden with high windows nearly covered in clutter and paperwork with a desk in the middle lit by yellow light#Cozy#Barely evil-looking at all
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Only two more episodes to go after this one and the gay is thriving as usual, so let's take a look:
1
Home and Peach keep staring intensly at the other's unconcious face while putting their head directly above the other's, resulting in unintentional headbuts. Boys, I know you're worried and want to be the first thing the other sees after waking up, but I'm sure there's less headache-inducing ways to go about it.
2
As per usual, Home is carrying Peach without complaint. (And I'm reminded once again that he's certainly not shy around his body o.O)
3
The looks/nonverbal communication between them are constant. Even surrounded by the rest of their family, their eyes always find each other first. Whether it's to comment on what just happened or to reassure each other on what's about to happen, one look says it all.
4
Pangpang is streaming and her viewers are shipping. They must be happy to see that Home and Peach have moved past their divorce era. ("Where's Peach?" they say, which, if you've ever been present for a live of some BL actors, well, you know.)
5
This shot is right out of a 2000s gay coming-of-age short film.
And the way Peach laughs so fondly and asks Home what he wants for dinner in a soft voice? The love is strong in this scene.
And then their kids join in to bug them.
(a commenter on YT pointed out Peach pulling down his shirt but I'm not even going to go there)
6
Home is so tuned in to Peach, when he get's a message and looks at it a little weirdly for a second, Home is immediately there to ask what's wrong.
7
Home is so genuinely happy that for Peach when he hears that he's finally getting closer to achieving his dream
only to force himself to keep up that happiness when he realises that it might get in the way of his own dream.
Meanwhile Peach can't even really be happy about this himself because being a cook is his dream but he doesn't want to lose his family, lose Home, to get there.
In fact, his first impulse after finding out is asking Home what he thinks about it, because just like Home, he's clearly at this point considering Home a part of his future. Decisions like that have to involve him. (And Home, you idiot. You could have just said you'd come with him. It's not like there's anything keeping you in Bangkok.)
But unfortunately those two have still not achieved this sense of security in their relationship (and definitely Home, probably also Peach, being orphans, I guess it's not surprising they're having some issues around attachment and feeling secure in the long-lastingness of their relationships). And so Home falls back on protecting his vulnerability by pretending it's not there. Rather than imposing difficulty onto Peach (,rather than facing the smallest possibility that Peach might choose this over him,) Home plays it off like there was never any future for them anyway, even after he had just confessed to his uncle ca. one minute earlier that all he wants is for them to stay together.
He isn't even very subtle in his overplaying (is that a word in English?) of his troubled emotions, at the same time using this opportunity to get physically close to Peach for potentially one of the last times.
8
Of course, as he told his uncle, all Home really wants is to stay together with Peach and his family.
But he has come quite a long way from tricking Peach into unfair contracts. So he'd rather stap back than cause Peach any problems, doesn't think it his right to put his selfish desires onto him. (Unfortunately, judging by the preview, Peach is also insecure so by doing that he's just hurting Peach more)
"Just us" huh, Home? You know, at this point you might as well just propose to him.
At least this time he has another member of his family there to cry into the shoulder of.
Lesbian Corner
The girls have taken a page out of the HomePeach handbook, clinging to each other at the revelation of a ghostly presence.
Now that Peach and Home are somewhat settled (well...) it's their turn to flirt their way through the end credits
Edit:
Oops, it seems I missed something. Kan and Pangpang even have their own shippers now
#maybe i'm reading a little too much into it since i've been thinking about this myself#but i find the repeated self-sabotaging of their relationship by peach and home very realistic in light of their definitely present#abandonment trauma. we know about home becoming an orphan at an early age and longing for but never gaining family ever since so it's#pretty obvious with him but the absence of peach and pangpang's birth family has also been quite loud at times (esp. when peach died).#we don't know when they died/disappeared but it's clearly been a while and it clearly also left an effect on peach#what better way to symbolise a queerplatonic relationship than ghost-hunting together in perpetuity#peaceful property#peaceful property the series#i really hope they can find their happy ends with each other. they deserve it
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#cats#outing myself once again as someone whos not attune whatsoever to human culture but - in all honesty I do not know#what 'psspsspss' means despite loving cats my entire life hghj.. I've just seen people online describe that as how you call a cat#but I have never in my life witnessed someone call a cat by making that noise or made that noise myself. I can't even think of an example o#it so I genuinely don't even know what that's supposed to be but. Included because I've seen it so much it must be something to someone#even when I was a kid I pretty much always just meowed to cats and tried to sound exactly like them or whatever meow I associated with them#obviously not literally saying “ME OW” but doing an actual cat meow. often times a kind of 'prrrow' sort of noise where you trill your tong#ue then lead into a softer vocal tone .. maybe like 'mrrrrauh' or something? Or sometimes just a trilling chirp immitating the#cat's ''mrrrrp'' they do sometimes. I used to mimic small kittens to get the attention of cats#with their like very high pitches squeky whine with a little bit of air out the nostrils at the end to imitate the sound of them having#tiny lungs that don't hold much air so with a long loud 'mew' it's sometimes a little strained near the end#Though usually I just imitate the cat that I'm around at the time. Sometimes I have done kind of a combination kissy lip sort of noise#tongue clicking. almost like tapping on the back of your front teeth with your tongue and sucking in. almost makes kind of a squirrel noise#ANYWAY... curiouse....
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(alan wake-gravity falls crossover) man i love that character. you know, the deeply paranoid author who made a pact with a dark entity that ultimately ended with him stranded in another dimension separated from his loved ones for years at a time? takes place in the pacific northwest? has twin imagery associated with him and a reoccurring specific piece of symbology related to the unfortunate situation they're in? doesn't ever explain the reasoning behind his actions and instead just kinda goes "bro trust me"? yeah he also wears an outer layer of clothing with elbow pads on it, that one.
#my art#stanford pines#alan wake (the man)#ford pines#gravity falls#alan wake#remedyverse#SAtT au#i am. normal about the crossovers i make up.#what do you mean the esoteric weird horror game about stories and the disney cartoon about family dont have a shared audience. sounds fake.#anyways the comic on the right is in honor of a joke i had to scrap in my fic wip due to a perspective switch.#rip that joke i thought you were pretty funny. i like the idea of alan critiquing his own manuscript pages upon the events happening.#oh i should probably do a warning since theres that crunchy image of the aw2 alan death screen huh. uh#blood#aw2 alan death screen my beloved. literally made me go ''oh god'' out loud in shock and horror when i first saw it#anyways did you know theres an au to this objectively already an au crossover. i call it ''bill cipher gets sent to the shadow realm''#bill doesn't show up a lot in this au he gets one scene where he taunts ford abt alan being a danger#with the implication that the dark place/presence genuinely freaks him out. but in this self indulgence of a self indulgence#alan essentially manages to trick bill into swapping places with him and bill ends up trapped in the writers room/the dark place.#lmao get yötön yö'd idiot. YOU are aleksi kesä now.#also i like the idea of zane and bill meeting as well as door and bill meeting. i think they might scare bill a little bit.#just like how zane scares me <3 what a cool character what the fuck is his deal#also you may be wondering why alans in his aw2 look and not aw or awan look despite the fact that lines up closer#to when gravity falls happens-ish. well the answer to that is 1: the crossover uses a lot of the elements from aw2#and 2: i like alans long hair and suit and beard. i like the pathetic sopping look when his hair is in his face
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The Times, 8 October 2017
#noel gallagher#as you were#noel on liam#lyric analysis#others on nl#2017#things#well where to begin with this#that 'know what i mean?' at the end there feels pretty loaded#'but i'm dignified now' then one beat later 'DID YOU KNOW MY BROTHER'S OBSESSED WITH ME'#totally believe he'd have started cuing up BE songs for the interviewer#if he hadn't been distracted by the opportunity to gloat over winning the prize of being liam's singular songwriting focus#interviewer: so liam wrote a song about you#noel: 'ONE' song? it's a good thing i'm here to correct you on the scope and depth of his obsession with me#interviewer: ...#noel: me over his ex-wife#interviewer: i wasn't aware it was a compet--#noel: *begins rifling through albums*#i clicked to read this interview in the first place because i was looking for something else entirely#and when i got to the highlighted part i actually said 'WHAT??' out loud in a voice of unadulterated outrage#and the fact that i've had to do that multiple times over the course of the last few months when reading articles about them#is the reason why i'm still here unable to pull myself away from this shakespearean-level insanity#anyway i'm just glad we're being dignified about it
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Do you think he has a curl care routine ? (I think he should)
Draw Kabru with curly hair cowards!!!!
#kabru#dungeon meshi#dreamy sigh#it’s been a long time since I’ve felt compelled to make fan art for anything much less One Guy#I’ve been infected with blorbofication and it is terminal :/#I see him as having like 3c hair#i think because he was brought up by an elf he never really got taught how to take care of his hair#white (elf) mom adopts black kid doesn’t know how to take care of coily hair#milsiril probably tried to comb it out constantly and it ended up in a perma frizz state#I’m imagining in the post cannon after he’s not dungeon crawling and has to make formal appearances in court#he spends time learning how to properly wash and condition his hair#this is my head cannon for why his hair is drawn Like That#even though I think chilchuck says out loud that he has curly hair#it’s hair that is naturally curly#but hasn’t been taken care of for aforementioned reasons#bwuhhhhhjhhh#I haven’t drawn faces in a really long time esp not character faces#been struggling drawing him trying to relearn a more casual style of drawing and hating it#i feel really confident with poses but not making characters look distinct in the face#and I haven’t quite figured out how to draw his pretty eyes consistently
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theo and liam always getting paired together in 6b during episodes where all of the other storylines focus on couples going through stuff together is so funny because when you look at it, the only episode where they really get split up is genotype, which is one of the rare episodes where scott ISN’T paired with malia (because he’s with liam) and mason isn’t with corey (because he’s with theo) aka the canon love interests. like these episodes were cutting from shit like scalia almost dying together to thiam having intimate conversations about how liam processes emotions and morey saying i love you to thiam swearing that neither of them are dying for each other 😭 just very amusing to me. theo raeken: the accidental love interest.
#like 😭#6b eps post theo getting kidnapped go pressure test -> triggers -> werewolves of london -> genotype -> 6.19 which i barely remember ->#then wolves of war aka the finale#pressure test: mason & corey are at deatons. theo shows up at the police station w everyone & shoves liam in the bathroom to berate him for#not being worried ab his own safety enough ??? 😭 & hes pretty much attached to liams hip in the group shots#also while theo & scott are outside doing their lil body bag trick malia and liam are pressed right against the window watching both of them#& during triggers we dont see corey but mason leaves theo & liam alone . & its a major bonding ep for them….#while scalia are also having their major bonding moment when they both almost Die#then during werewolves of london theo just shows up at the school and they end up calling scalia for help 😭#and again genotype breaks all the couples off from each other so its mason n theo / scott n liam / malia with her dad#and during wolves of war i literally laughed out loud because it bounces around from jethan to morey to thiam all having heart to hearts#not saying it was intentional but it was very funny framing TO ME#that ao3 tag thats like ‘they are dating in secret but only one is aware’ LIEKDJENEBR#they basically made theo liam’s love interest on accident just bcuz everyone else was already paired off w someone 😭#thiam#saw someone the other day say they just dont get how people Came Up with thiam and its like#ok if you dont ship it whatever but if you say you cant see why youre just lying 😭 look at the material
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Today's been pretty shit at work like usual and I found myself thinking about Stan...about how despite the way he looks and how his diet is crap, he DOES do a lot of manual, physical labor especially hauling shit around to get the portal built....he's probably got. Pretty strong arms. And pretty good stamina.
#jane journals#LOOK AWAAAAAAY >////<#GOD I WAS TELLING MY PARTNER TODAY THAT ITS SO JOEVER#LIKE??#i feel like we both started falling for him at the same time but im definitely more focusdd on him#LOOK WHAT THEY DID TO ME#like we watched the dinosaur episode last night and during Stan's story about punching the pterodactyl#its funny because its SO exaggerated and the visuals show him all ripped which hes definitely NOT#HOWEVER...HE DOES ACTUALLY PUNCH THE PTERODACTYL IN THE END!!!!#maybe hes not ripped and maybe he has his days where his oldness REALLY catches up to him#i mean dude needs an orthopedic back pillow for cryin out loud#but hes still got it basically#hes still pretty capable 🥴🥴🥴💖💖💖#crush: ❓️#btw the only thing keeping him on the crush list and off the f/o list is no ideas for a ship tag...YET!!!
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If media has taught me one thing, it's to never own a paperweight capable of causing traumatic brain injury.
My dad owned a heavy glass paperweight once that tapered into a sturdy sharp point on the top, and the fact that no one was murdered with this at all before his retirement from the lawfirm is the surest proof I have that this reality is in fact not fiction.
#original#a marble paperweight or book end? I'm sorry do you want to DIE#luckily real life doesn't work on trope rules like fiction does and so it was just a paperweight and not Chekov's Paperweight#tropes#fantasy tropes#fiction tropes#story tropes#I have a clear memory of being like 12 standing in his office holding that thing & saying out loud 'oh this is a murder weapon'#luckily dad did boring law stuff and not criminal law or high profile corporate lawsuits or whatever#but i do remember thinking it was a stupid thing to keep around bc everyone knows that being hit ONE TIME with a paperweight = death#at least on tv anyway lol#our flag means death#columbo#the fall of the house of usher#I'm pretty sure this trope is in all three of those#come to think of it my dad still might own that paper weight. the fool!#tempting fate in his old age XD#hopefully he doesn't do the Columbo victim thing where he informs someone that he has blackmail on them#and that he's the only one who knows about it. because that's a great way to get paperweight-murdered lol
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2nd hearing test today and it looks normal thank FUCKKK. well ofc I'm still deaf, normal For Me
#actually idr if i mentioned it on here before i think i typed a rant and then closed the app before i hit post#but basically just a jumpscare my last audio tone graph came out Bad and they were like aw fuck youve lost a lot more hearing#which is WORRYING bc my deafness is sensorineural ie. from auditory nerve/brain damage not physical damage#so if it was suddenly getting worse well nothing they can rly do to figure out WHY its getting worse let alone try to fix it#but nah second test came out pretty much the same as usual. i think maybe bc i did the other one at the end of the day instead of early#morning maybe my auditory processing was just worse or smth it happens lol#well anyway they took fresh moulds so should be able to replace my 3 year old ones in a few weeks yayy#and im on the waiting list for new hearing aids with them too...and once i get them i can get an accessory to hook em to bluetooth#altho the nhs prolly wont cover it. but access to work should do if it comes to that 👍#my life is gonna get so much fucking easier when i can tune them into shit instead of switching them for super loud earphones#anyway gotta get my ass to work now blegh. always feels weird having my workday routine broken up#.diaries
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It has taken me this long to realize that yes, the fact that Tamett is from a country that has been conquered and subjugated and had its culture and language suppressed and been expected to assimilate and to be glad and grateful to be part of--but never truly one with or accepted by--the conquering nation until many of its people conclude that the safest thing they can do is keep silent and keep their heads down and try to appease....that's a parallel for his situation as Josiah's companion.
If I ever write anything thoughtful, it is entirely by accident.
#The Blackberry Bushes#The Blackberry Bushes OC facts#Tamett Lockridge#somehow I ended up writing part of his conversation with Odren this morning#and the way Odren talks to him...oh he's awful#I really want the reader to see how Tamett is treated day after day year after year#the things people say to him#and how he holds so much back#what's going on in his head is strikingly different from what he says out loud#(which at this point is very little)#he's suppressing a lot of anger trying to deny to himself that it's even there#and that's going to go about as well as you would expect#especially with how Josiah treats him#and I'm starting to wonder if even Ayra and Ateva unconsciously treat him differently in some ways because he's Noriberian#they've all been raised with the assumption that Noriber is inferior to Lienne#is just a conquered territory that exists to prop up Lienne#and that all its people have been happy to assimilate into Liennese culture#and the girls do genuinely like and get along with Tamett!#but these attitudes would be pretty ingrained into them and impossible to avoid#...so what would that look like?
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had to screenrecord this bit in Nighthawks where they're like "oooo he's so hedonistic, he loves the nightlife" and then they really cut to Rutger Hauer's character standing alone in the back of the disco club point blank refusing to have fun
ignore the way the video is choppy, my internet connection was really bad while I was watching this lol
#I thought this movie was pretty good up until the very end which was so hysterically bad it made me scream out loud with laughter#literally just like the very last two minutes of the movie#also really loved the like enemies meet-cute he has with Sylvester Stallone in this same club later on. where they're like death-staring#each other from across the dance floor while he's also actively grinding on some woman. insane lol#hannah is talking#nighthawks
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Oskar's reward, unsurprisingly, is that we can get him to paint our picture (or one of our companions').
"Here he is - the hero of the hour! My brushes are oiled, the canvas prepped, and you..."
"Well, you're comfortable. That's the main thing. So, shall we begin?"
Everyone around here is SUCH A FUCKING DICK about HECTOR'S CLOTHES.
"There's something wrong with what I'm wearing?" Hector says between his teeth.
"No, no, no, of course not!" Oskar says brightly. "As an artist, I want to capture your true essence in this portrait. Bloodstains and all."
-----
Hector is pretty pissed at Oskar and wants very little to do with him at this point. But he got Karlach's portrait painted anyway.
Because even though he knows it wasn't meant literally... he can't turn down anything that promises her immortality...
#bjk plays baldur's gate 3#hector carlisle#the reward is super bugged; i had him paint karlach and got a picture of jaheira lmao#which i can't even place anywhere besides throwing it on the ground as near as i can tell#but as usual i make my own feels regardless of whether the game provides#it was pretty cute too that hector commented out loud after the painting was done 'a good likeness but i prefer the real thing' XD#done with this for tonight i think#more sidequesting this week!#i think we're getting pretty close to the end of the track o.o;
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Hey, you guys? That was fun as hell. Do you know about this??? Concerts are so fun!
#i had a 20 minute walk back to the hotel and i was all alone on the street and i played more joker out out loud on my ohone and sang along a#nd the moon was so pretty and i 100% looked like i was drunk to the cars passing by#flowers talks#okay there was a part where the path was a little scary ngl because it went through some woods? and the path split and i couldn't tell where#to go? but it all worked out in the end 😌
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#ok so mini rant session#i am doing a bit better today - little less distraught over getting fired from a job i thought i was doing pretty good at and i was trying#really hard and genuinely enjoying#and just more baffled because truly i had no warning and i was completely blindsided#i was in the middle of a 3 month trial and i would have a review at the end in which i would be offered a permanent position if it went well#and i thought i was making my way towards that! granted i was still making mistakes but genuinely not of such a great scale i thought it#called for my immediate dismissal#that being said i was still VERY MUCH IN TRAINING. i had only been there A MONTH AND A HALF learning COMPLETELY NEW SYSTEMS#and i was told that i had been there a few weeks already and that i wasn’t catching on quick enough. that there were some areas i was#understanding and others i just simply wasn’t#and i asked what areas specifically so that i could learn more and try harder#and they didn’t give me a specific answer.#ok and so. so. i have this insecurity.#that at first impression people will like me. that they may think i’m pretty or kind or funny or whatever#but then they spend time with me or get to know me and realize that that’s all bullshit.#that i’m actually not pretty and im mean and loud and selfish and lazy and rude and etc etc etc#MASSIVE fucking insecurity in that like that’s why i genuinely don’t have friends or a significant other#and that genuinely i’m just a Bad Person#and when i was fired? i was told ‘a persons true colours show after a few weeks’#so that’s MAJORLY fucking me up.#when i was hired i was boasted to about my boss’s hiring process and how she’s ’only been fooled twice’#and the morning before i was fired in a meeting my supervisor told everyone that i was doing quite well.#so yeah i truly had no fucking warning. at fucking all.#hurt and confused and angry and baffled and did i mention hurt#anyways if you’re still here i’m sorry i know this is not a good look for me
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