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dragons-and-dwarves-are-nice · 7 months

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The Grim Reaper's Guide to Breaking Every Rule of the Universe /// Chapter 1

I just want to say thank you so much to everyone who showed love towards the prologue and the memes I made, I've ended up gaining more followers in the last week than I have in the last couple years lol. Unfortunately Alastor isn't going to make an appearance for at least two chapters, but I hope you like what I've written so far. Enjoy!

Summary: When touring America for the sake of it, you go to stay with your aunt in New Orleans for a while, taking up a peaceful part-time job restoring objects. But a few weeks in, a package arrives containing an old radio that's seen better days, along with a note seemingly written by someone who thinks they could fist-fight the Devil.

What you didn't know, was the hell of a path that was now set out in front of you. Not fist-fighting the Devil, but instead a very smug radio host who would have no problem spending the rest of his days driving you up the walls.

But two could play that game.

Tags: Demiromantic-Asexual Alastor x Demiromantic-Asexual OC/Reader - 1920s/30s New Orleans - fluff - angst - EXTREME slow burn - crack - Violence (It's Alastor what else)

Word Count: 5278

Warnings: Period-typical racism and sexism, Period-typical attitudes towards neurodivergency. MC'S RACE IS DEFINED DUE TO PLOT REASONS (also because she is based off my OC)

Taglist - comment or message to be added!

Now available on Wattpad and AO3 (please let me know if links aren't working)

< Prologue // Chapter 1 // Chapter 2 >

PART 1: Chapter 1

Congrats! You're Adopted

Impluvius (Definition): Soaked with rain. (Adjective)

New Orleans, Louisiana, USA – Tuesday, 11th June, 1929.

Arriving on your Aunt’s doorstep soaked to the bone in the middle of a hurricane was the last thing on your list of ‘crazy crap that could happen’. But alas, here you were, shivering and seething as you hauled your trunks up the steps to the front door. You were lucky enough that the area was only being battered by the edge of the storm, allowing you to find a sleeper train that was still willing to run from Montgomery to New Orleans, but it had left you in a sour mood when they had revoked their food services, because damn you were in the mood for a simple ham and cheese sandwich. And the mood only had to sour further when you found yourself standing outside the station for a good fifteen minutes waiting for a driver whilst you and your belongings were drowned by the ongoing summer downpour. Sure, you were used to the torrential downpour of the Yorkshire moors, where there were more wet days than dry, but you were prepared for that, not for the barbarous battering of the 70mph winds that forced you to stuff your useless hat away, leaving the once neat updo of hair that you had meticulously styled that morning to whip you in the eye whenever a gale flew past.

And, as if the gods had something out for you, the taxi that pulled up decided it would be hilarious to speed to a stop in the middle of the giant puddle that had accumulated next to the pavement, sending out a small wave that reached your ankles, soaking your frilly socks and favourite patterned heeled oxford shoes that your mother had gifted on your 18th birthday.

“Oh for Christ’s sake.” You hissed to yourself, lifting your foot to inspect the leather. The driver was lucky that they were already three years old, otherwise you would’ve given him a glare deathly enough to send him to an early grave. Or so you hoped.

Thankfully, the driver didn’t pay you much attention, clearly too tired for small talk, simply asking for an address. Though he had paused when you spoke, turning to eye you up and down where you were cramped uncomfortably between your luggage in the back seat, grunting out a “You English?”, to which you nodded, muttering that you were visiting your aunt. The drive was silent after that, the only sound being the loud sputtering engine and the rain that pounded against the windshield. Minutes passed and you were quickly outside the house, which led to now: trembling in your boots, rapping your knuckle against the green wooden door with wet hair clinging to your face and eyebags that could rival a chronic insomniac.

It wasn’t long until the sound of locks clicking and unlatching reached your ears, and the door creaked open, an eye peeking through the gap. After it landed on you, it quickly swung open, revealing your Aunt Agnes in a nightgown and robe, with an oil lantern in hand. At the sight of her, you gave a half-wave and shaky smile.

She gasped your name. “Oh, there you are my lovely! I thought you got lost in the storm!” Realising the state you were in, she hurriedly placed the lantern on the hallway cabinet, rushing out to help you haul your luggage in. “I was so worried your train had been cancelled by the hurricane. Here, get yourself out the cold – you can put your coat to dry by the fire.” She handed you your leather duffel bag before crouching down and lugging the largest trunk into her arms with a grunt. Making sure everything was in the hallway, she went to close the door, though you didn’t miss the wary scan she took of the street, or the diligent focus of making sure every lock and chain was in place. The wariness soon disappeared, however, as she spun around to face with a grin, her thick braid of long, brown hair whipping over her shoulder.

Giggling as she bounded over, she wrapped you up in a strong hug, and you reciprocated with matching eagerness, but also trying your best not to cringe at the squelching noises your waterlogged coat made.

“It’s so nice to see you!” You said exhausted as you released her, teeth still chattering from the chill. “The rooves were practically coming off in Montgomery, so I’m surprised they were willing to keep the trains running.”

“Well there’s no need to worry about that any more, you’re here now! Come, I must get you warmed up.” she asserted warmly, leading you with a hand rubbing against your back, down the hallway into the kitchen. Rummaging through a wicker basket, she pulled out a spare nightgown. “Go see if your spare underwear is dry, then head to the bathroom across the hall and change into this. I’ll go make you some warm milk and honey.”

Thanking her, you quickly made your way into the living room where your belongings had been left, unlatching the clasps of the trunk to reveal your damp clothing. Luckily, there was some underwear in the middle that had not yet been affected, so you grabbed them and returned to the hallway to try and find the bathroom.

After several failed attempts of opening the wrong doors, you finally came across the bathroom, eagerly shedding yourself of your dripping wet layers, welcoming the warmth of the soft, dry underwear and ivory coloured nightgown. Returning to the living room, you dumped your wet clothes on your trunk, before walking around the sofa. Planting your behind in the armchair closest to the fire, you melted into the cushions with a relieved sigh, sticking your feet out in front of the flames to try and get some feeling back in your toes.

It wasn’t long before the clinking from the kitchen ceased, and your Aunt came back through, meticulously balancing a wooden tray with two large steaming mugs sat on top. Placing them down, she handed you the one covered in purple flowers. Thanking her, you instantly took a sip, letting the sweet honey and heated milk warm your insides as you watched your aunt take a seat in her own well-loved armchair.

“Sooo,” she began with a knowing grin whilst tossing you a crocheted blanket. “How’s America been so far for you?”

You scrunched your face in thought. “…Surprisingly not as bad as I thought. I think Great-Auntie Beatrice had influenced my opinion a bit too much growing up.”

Agnes rolled her eyes. “A bit?? That old woman has despised the country since that American lad up and left her back in the 1870’s.”

You snorted over your mug. “Well, she certainly has taught me to not raise my expectations about the place, but, I’ve got to say it has allowed me to be more impressed by what I see – especially the Appalachian mountains, they’ve definitely got a unique charm to them. Thank you, by the way, for letting me use your cabin up there.”

She waved you off. “Oh, it’s no problem, really. I would give you the place if the twins weren’t so keen on going up there.”

“Speaking of the twins, how are the three of you doing?” you asked.

Agnes let a weary smile cross her face. “We’re doing better, now anyways. The twins had some issues when starting school here – starting fresh at 16 in a completely different country certainly has its cons. It’s died down now, but in the first few months they were followed home by some kids who would taunt them for the way they spoke. Hell,” she laughed in disbelief. “they even had a teacher who thought they were Scottish for the first three weeks until I came in for a meeting about their grades and spent ten minutes explaining to her that not everyone in England speaks the same way as those pompous Londoners who squeal at the slightest bit of mud on their shoes.”

“What?!!” you guffawed, trying to stifle a laugh. “Please tell me they at least beat some of the kids up.”

“I wish.” Agnes sighed, sinking back in her chair. “But I don’t want anymore attention on them than they already have. Anything else and those kids will go looking for dirt on them and the last thing I want is for them to find out who their father is.”

You looked up at her in surprise. “You don’t??” you asked, perplexed.

“Don’t get me wrong,” Agnes said sternly. “I loved their father to the ends of the universe and back, but the two of them being mixed English-Japanese will garner the wrong type of attention here. God forbid, if it gets out their mum’s a pagan witch it’ll be the end of peace!” She vented, throwing her arms up in frustration.

You pondered her words for a moment. “But I thought New Orleans was considered a safer place for things like witchcraft? Isn’t voodoo a popular religion and practice here?”

“It is, but it’s still kept more on the down-low. When you have a religion originating from a place like Africa, white Christians can get reeeaallll iffy about it, and it’s no different here – I believe there’s laws in place against parts of the practice.” She explained. “But it doesn’t stop them from keeping their shops open. Our neighbour Neliah runs a gorgeous corner shop near the outskirts – I can’t and won’t practice voodoo, but I do treat myself with a visit whenever I need new herbs, I could literally fall asleep in there with the lovely way it smells.” You smiled at the way she seemed to get lost in thought, though she quickly snapped herself out of it. “But anyway! How’s my sister doing? How did Emmett react with the news?”

You startled slightly at the sudden change. “Yea, mum’s actually doing alright. Dad… took a while to get his head around what was going on, you know, when he found her Grimoire and spell books, and the fact that we’d been hiding it from him for years, but he’s surprisingly calmed down about it. They still go to church, to keep up their reputation and all that, but he’s letting her hang up protection wards around the house, he even got involved with casting a spell with us at one point, even though he had no clue what he was doing the whole time.” You snorted, memories of your father’s wide eyes as he watched your mother wave a stick of incense around him, reminding you of the time when you were around six, you had returned from the forest by your house, covered in mud and brandishing stick-swords, declaring yourself as the deer queen as you dragged a shedded antler you had found among the moss through the back door – the look on your father’s face when he walked in from work to see you tying pink ribbons along the muddy, moss-covered bone was priceless.

Agnes let out a chortle, before sipping at her drink, her expression shifting slightly to one of mild concern. “And uh, how did they react when you were – ah – found out?”

Right, the whole reason you were here in the first place. “Not the greatest.” You said dejectedly. “Mum was distraught when they said they were thinking of taking me away – calling them every name under the sun the second they said ‘asylum’. So when dad suggested coming here, she jumped at the chance, but was crying the whole drive to the docks. I gave them an itinerary of where I was going to be and when, and they’ve been using it to send me letters and gifts, but it’s been hard being fully alone for the first time in my life.” You sank into your chair, tears building in your eyes the longer you spoke.

Agnes looked you up and down, her eyes filled with sorrow for you. “Well,” she began softly, standing up to approach you with a gentle hand on your shoulder. “you're not alone anymore, so you can forget about those stupid government officials and your, uh,” she squinted her eyes in confusion. “what do they call it?”

“Over action of the mind.” You forced out with a huff. “They don’t have an official name for it, but me being fidgety and forgetful is enough for them to call me insane apparently.”

She held her hand out for you to take, which you did, allowing her to pull you up. She said your name sternly. “You are not insane. You’re the loveliest, most intelligent girl I know – especially considering the amount of books you’ve read in your 21 years.” You gave her a small smile as thanks. “Now, I’ve readied your bedroom for you. It’s a little bare, but you're staying a while so I’ve left it to be up to your imagination, and with how fast your mind goes a minute, I’m sure you’ll make it the most fantastical and extravagant room in New Orleans.” She explained as she helped you pick up your luggage, leading you through the hallway and up the stairs.

Walking down the main upper hallway, you followed her down a second one to the left, until you came to a stop on the first door on the left side. Lowering her voice to a whisper, Agnes gestured to the door on the left further down. “That’s the bathroom. I’ve moved the boys’ stuff out and given them the second one across the main hall so you can have it to yourself.” She then gestured to the two doors on the right side of the hall, with a sign hanging on each, though the candlelight was too dim to make out the words. “That’s their bedrooms, so I’m afraid you’ll have to prepare for some loud wake-up calls.” She said with an amused smile.

Opening the first door on the left, she led you into a spacey room, that was, as described, quite bare, with only a four-poster bed pushed into the top-right corner, a dark, polished set of drawers and matching wardrobe facing the bed on the opposite wall, along with a familiar -looking changing screen in the bottom left corner decorated with storks flying above a Japanese landscape – you recognised it as one of the wedding gifts your uncle had gifted your aunt sixteen years ago. In the top left corner by the large open window was a vanity with clawed feet, holding up a large, ornate oval mirror, a cushioned stool pushed under it. Next to it was another door that led to the balcony. Nearer to the bedroom door was a large roll top desk, covered in drawers, shelves and pigeon holes, though the only object present was a small typewriter tucked under one of the shelves.

Excitement filling you, you strode across the room to the bed, the feeling of the fluffy rug under your feet a welcoming sign. Placing your trunk and bag down as gracefully as you could, you spun around to face your aunt with a wide grin on your face. “This is amazing!” you gasped quietly, mindful of the two other sleeping residents. “You didn’t have to give me all this.”

“Of course I did!” Agnes exclaimed, walking over to give you another hug. “Did you forget your mother and I practically lived and raised you and the twins together until just a year ago? I’m treating the three of you as equals until the day I die.”

Looking down at her, you observed the slight wrinkles appearing under her eyes, and the dark rings accompanying them that hadn’t been there the last time you saw her back when she still lived in York. Sighing, you stepped back. “I know.” You agreed warmly. “And thank you, for everything you’ve done so far.”

She ruffled the top of your head, your long strands of hair still clumped together with rain water and the clips you had failed to pin it back with. “Anything for you. Now get some sleep, it’s past midnight and the boys will be giving you the earliest and loudest wake-up call once they figure out you’re here.”

You agreed, bidding your aunt goodnight before taking the candle she left for you over to the vanity, where you spent the next ten minutes trying your best to find every pin and clip in your damp hair, then tediously trying to brush it smooth enough to then twist into a loose braid. You also quickly took out your belongings that were wet, hanging them over the screen and the drying rack you had found in the wardrobe. Satisfied you collapsed onto the double bed, bouncing slightly on the plush mattress. Burying yourself under the covers, you blew the candle out, bathing the room in darkness, and using the rain outside as white noise, you slowly drifted off, mentally preparing yourself for the twins when they would come to wake you up.

Oh, and wake you up they did.

New Orleans, Louisiana, USA – Wednesday, 12th June, 1929.

You were barely able to pull your heavy eyelids apart when the door in the far corner swung open, the door handle hitting the wall with a resounding ‘BANG!’, followed by a very loud “BOYS!!”, echoing through the house.

That wasn’t the end of it though. You had barely begun to turn over at the sound of several pairs of heavy footsteps bounding across the wooden floorboards, when two very heavy weights crashed on top of you, causing your eyes to fly open as the wind was knocked out of you.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!?!” you screeched, flailing about as much as you could until your arms were free, reaching over the covers to shove at the two long figure sprawled across you.

Loud giggling filled your ears, and you looked over your duvet to find two familiar identical-looking faces, with matching cheshire grins, peering over at you mischievously from where they laid across your body. Groaning, you flopped back down, choosing instead to stare at the forest green drapes strung across the poster bed. Though it was soon replaced by two mops of loose, curly hair as they peeked over the edge at you, one dark brown-almost black, the other a pale blonde. You were thankful of their opposite hair colour, because the only way you would’ve been able to tell them apart otherwise would be with the different freckles and moles dotted across their pale faces.

“Mum said you came in looking like a soggy rat last night.” Teased Allie, reaching out to prod at your cheek with a snicker.

Your own hand shot out, shoving his blonde head away. “Did not.” You responded groggily, as you tried to shove his twin off the other side of you. “Now get your fat arses off of me.”

They gasped in mock offence, immediately plopping themselves back on top of you, both reaching to poke and prod at your face. “You said a bad word ~” Ollie chimed in a sing-song voice, kicking his legs behind him playfully as he tried to shove a finger in your ear. Slapping them both away, you prepared for another onslaught, until determined footsteps drew closer to your door, and the two of them froze as their mother walked in, a wooden spoon grasped in her hand.

“ODESSEY. ADAGIO. Get off of your cousin before I send you to school WITHOUT breakfast!” She hollered, a thunderous look on her face.

The two of them collectively groaned. “Muuuumm, don’t call us thaaaat.” Whined Ollie, as he took his sweet time slowly rolling over your whole body before sliding off the bed to stand next to his equally grumpy brother. You followed not long after, sitting up at the edge to watch the ordeal with a smug smile.

“Call you what?! Your real names?! Well then, you better get yourselves downstairs!” she exclaimed, pointing at the door with the wooden spoon.

Reluctantly, they complied, but that didn’t stop Allie from poking his tongue out as he disappeared through the doorway, narrowly missing a swing from his mother’s spoon. Facing your aunt, you finally noticed that she was already up and dressed for work, donning a cream blouse with a blue ribbon tied around the neck, along with a matching blue maxi pencil skirt that reached just above her ankles. Her hair was meticulously styled in an updo similar to the one you had yesterday, her chestnut brown hair twisted back in swirls that ended in a loose low bun, with some strands neatly framing her face. She approached you, the short heels of her shoes muffled by the rug.

“Morning! Breakfast is ready.” She explained with a smile that you returned. “Freshen yourself up and come meet us downstairs, ok?” You agreed, and she disappeared back downstairs.

Rummaging through you clothes that were now thankfully dry, you opted for a loose blouse, and a pair of wide-legged tweed trousers, taking them to the bathroom. Slipping a leather belt through the loops, you quickly wet your hair over the bath, scrubbing in some shampoo and conditioner before rinsing it out and rubbing a towel over the strands until it was no longer dripping. Happy with the light makeup you applied, you headed back downstairs, running a hand through the wet tangles until you reached the dining table.

“I see what mum meant by soggy rat.” You turned to see Allie smirking over the table as you sat down in front of a plate full of English breakfast.

“I’ll turn you into a soggy rat.” You muttered back, stuffing half a hash-brown into your mouth, whilst simultaneously trying not to sigh in relief after not eating for at least 24 hours.

“OoOoh shiver me timbers!” he mocked back, waving his hands in mock fright.

Ollie’s tall figure appeared as he walked over from the kitchen - bacon, eggs, hash-browns and baked beans piled excessively onto his plate. “Mum told us you were going to be staying in our cabin up in the mountains.” He said as he sat down. “Did you like the gift we left?” he said with a grin half lopsided by the food he was shoving in his mouth.

You glared up at them from your plate. “Yes. The excessive amount of fake cockroaches in the bathroom was a very welcomed surprise. Odessey.”

The grin on your cousin’s face fell into a pout at the use of his full name. Letting out a prolonged grunt, he returned to his breakfast.

“Besides,” you started. “It’s not like I’m the only one suffering here. Apparently you’re both Scottish now.”

The two of them let out a collective groan, slumping in their seats.

“It’s not our fault Miss Sammie has less intelligence than a hamster.” Whined Allie as he stabbed an egg with his fork. “She thought Japan was part of China the other day!”

You let out a sharp laugh. “I hope that doesn’t reflect on your learning, or your mum will end up with steam coming out her ears.” You snickered.

“Thankfully it doesn’t.” replied Ollie, rolling his grey eyes as he stuck a whole wad of bacon in his mouth, making sure to not get any grease on his uniform. “Otherwise we’d be begging mum to move us back to England.”

“Speaking of moving, how are you guys finding it here?” you asked, hoping the answers were positive.

“Meh, it’s been alright.” Said Allie with a shrug. “The alligators are cool, but apparently we’re not allowed to wrestle them, which is soooo boring.”

“And the summers are shit. Nothing but heatwaves.” Ollie added.

“Well that’s what you get when you’re used to living in the North-East of England, where one of the nearest land masses is Norway.” You pointed out. “Plus English summers can be unbelievably humid, so I’m not sure what you’re whining about.”

“Oho, just you wait until July hits, then you’ll eat your words.” He retorted. “Hurricane season can be a bitch, too.”

“Don’t remind me.” You groaned. “I barely experienced the tail-end of one last night and it almost killed me.”

The two cackled at you, much to your annoyance, but is was cut short at the sound of your name being called. Looking up, you watched as your aunt poked her head around the doorway, the handset of a rotary phone pressed between her ear and shoulder, beckoning you over with an eager look, before disappearing back into the hallway. Quickly, you got up, marching round the table. Turning the corner, you watched as she ended the call. “Yes, yes. Thank you so much Mr LeBlanc, I’ll call you back as soon as I can. Yes – buh-bye now. Bye.”

Placing the phone back on its metal cradle, she whirled around to face you, excitement prominent on her features. “Sooo, that was Mr LeBlanc on the phone…” she proclaimed, eyeing you with a growing smile.

All you could do was stare in confusion, silence filling the wood-panelled hallway. Agnes darted her wide eyes between you and the phone, clearly waiting in anticipation for your reaction, but you only knew two things about New Orleans: jazz, and that it had a river shaped slightly similar to the London Thames. So you continued to stare.

Seeing that you weren’t going to react, she let out a sigh. “Mr LeBlanc runs Héritage Amour Réparation D’Antiquités on Julia Street down near the Mississippi River, and he’s willing to take you on as an apprentice?” she said as if it was the most obvious thing on Earth.

You blinked. “Wait, you’ve been looking for apprenticeships for me??” You gawked. “Since when??? I don’t think I even mentioned that I would be looking for one in the letters I sent you.”

“Oh, you haven’t.” she assured. “Your mum told me in a letter about a month ago when you were up in New York, so I thought I would speed up the process by looking for one for you.”

You continued to gawk in silence.

“Careful,” smirked Allie from over your shoulder. “You’re gonna catch flies.”

You didn’t even turn to face him as you reached a hand back, ignoring his whine as you smushed it against his face, shoving him back into the dining room.

“You –” you pointed at yourself. “You got me an apprenticeship??” She nodded excitedly. “Jesus Christ Agnes. At this point I’m gonna be indebted to you for the rest of my life!”

She clasped her hands together, throwing her head back as she laughed. “It’s no problem, really. I just want you to get settled in as soon as possible. I told Mr LeBlanc that if you accepted, he’s welcome to come for tea on Friday to meet you, then, if he’s happy, we’ll go for a day out around the city centre, and maybe visit him in his shop during that time. Sound good?”

You blinked repeatedly, trying to wrap your head around what your aunt was saying. “I – uh, yea. That would be great, actually.”

“Great! I’ll give him a call back, and you’ll meet him on Friday.” She proclaimed, satisfied as she picked the phone back up, holding the headset to her ear whilst twisting the numbers into the dial.

Still in a small state of shock, you turned back towards the dining room, slowly making your way back to your seat. Plopping down, you were met with the smug smiles of the twins.

“Looks like you’re gonna have to splurge big time on mum’s birthday. Don’t ’cha think Allie?” said Ollie, turning to his brother with a shit-eating grin.

His brother returned his expression with equal enthusiasm. “Oh yea. I was thinking, perhaps a top of the range Gramophone? I heard they have the new model in down at that shop on Canal Street.” He turned to you. “What do ya think cousin? Ready to serve our mum for the rest of eternity?”

All you could do was flick egg at their foreheads.

——

Friday came running up on you before you even realised, and here you were helping your aunt prepare roasted duck and vegetables whilst simultaneously trying to keep the twins away from the desserts in the icebox – you figured the sneaky buggers knew exactly what creaky floorboards to avoid. When the doorbell rang, Agnes encouraged you to go answer it, so, putting on a smile, you opened the door to welcome in your guest.

Mr LeBlanc was a warm and chirpy type of man: 63 years old with white hair and a matching frizzy moustache and beard, dressed in a smart blue shirt and neatly ironed trousers and slacks. He was around 5’7 – around the average height for men at this time. Sticking his hand out, he gave you a wide smile, and feeling the welcoming aura ride off him in waves, you gladly grasped his outstretched hand with your own.

“Bonne soirée! I do hope I’ve got the right address!” he laughed, his accent a funny mix between French and southern American. You assured that he was at the right place, introducing yourself. “Oh, what a lovely name! I am Ralph LeBlanc, but I’m sure your aunt has already informed you of me.” He said expectantly, voice slightly croaky and hoarse from old age.

Giving him a smile and a nod, you invited him in, bringing him to the dining room where your aunt and cousins were just finishing the preparations for dinner, and you all sat down, tucking into the delicious meal.

The dinner was successful, Ralph happily agreeing to take you on as an apprentice whilst also assisting him with running the repair shop, as he was currently the only one managing it. You had informed him of your history degree, and your school awards in art, and after that he was very eager to agree, almost acting excited when he invited you to come to the shop next Monday for a ‘starter shift’ where he would show you the ropes and make sure you were settled. It was as if the gods switched up on your luck, turning it round from the horrific start you had arriving here, and you weren’t planning on losing this good streak anytime soon.

“Now,” said Mr LeBlanc as he stood putting his coat on by the front door. “Make sure you are wearing something comfy and flexible, preferably pants if you own any, as we don’t want any skirts getting trapped in anything.” You nodded, and he paused for a moment, looking up at you. “Odd question, but how tall are you and your cousins? I don’t think I’ve met many with your heights, especially a woman.”

You glanced at your feet, now conscious of the way you towered over him slightly. “Last time I checked I was 5’9, and the twins are 6 foot. I uh, got it from my dad – he’s 6’1, and they got it from theirs.”

His eyes widened as he puffed his cheeks out. “La vache that’s tall. And did you say the boys were only 16? Wow, I really ain’t trying to make this sound weird but those magazine people would snatch you three up if they knew you were here.”

You laughed shaking your head, albeit nervously at the thought of having your picture taken. Thanking him, you waved him out and said your goodbyes.

Closing the door, you let out a relieved sigh, grateful that the evening was successful, and you retreated back to your room for the evening.

Thought it didn’t stop your excitement for the Monday to come.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hope you've enjoyed it so far! The ending’s a bit rushed, and Alastor's not going to appear for a couple chapters, but I hope I can make the wait worth it. See you soon for Chapter 2!!

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127 notes · View notes

chaifootsteps · 8 months

Note

So Raph finally, once again, straight up admitted he's not an SA victim.

I have to give him credit for being honest. Lying about SA (which sadly does happen and I know people don't want to think about it, but it does happen) is a very disgusting thing to do. Like Viv lying about Raph being an SA victim!

What I can't him credit for, is putting his fetish material in a fucking show made for millions on Amazon Prime with no trigger warning.

Raph said that he could practice his kink safely and privately with other people. That would be totally fine and cool, if he didn't put his fetish material in a fucking show made for millions on Amazon Prime with no trigger warning.

He boarded Poison. He choreographed for it. His dialogue from his fucking Valangel rape comic was used in the scene. Viv clearly has a noncon/rape kink. She wrote and directed it. Which, again, would be fine if she didn't put their fetish material in a fucking show made for millions on Amazon Prime with no trigger warning.

It's extremely disgusting to have 2 people who have not been SA'd (Viv has not publicly come forward about supposedly being SA'd herself, and is now straight up liking posts saying you don't need to have trauma to like certain fetishes. Hmmm.) write and board a scene and plot like this. I know Sam Haft said he was a victim (and if that's the case then I am truly sorry) but he also said he wanted Raph, who clearly has issues and has a fetish for this (and also sexually harassed a 15 year old child) to come back to twitter. Also, what the fuck was that tweet about Fizz being a "baby slut"? I've seen Viv like particularly cutesy art of Fizz that's um... pretty gross and borders on fetishistic a lot of the time (mainly wearing children-esque clothing and acting cutesy). You can't have someone who clearly has issues to work in a professional environment.

I'm into noncon and have read hundreds of fanfics like ep4. It's clearly a noncon fanfic with a massive budget. Jesus Christ, I write fanfics like this, but I at least tag and rate everything and always state in my notes that I don't condone the actions of SA. And when I saw ep4... it's clear to me what it was.

Amazon needs to get this show pulled. It's insensitive and frankly sickening to a CSA victim like me, who also happens to be into noncon.

There's nothing wrong with practicing kinks with partners and keeping what you like behind closed doors, but it's another thing to disregard victims and survivors all for the sake of your wank off material that's being broadcasted to millions of people (with no trigger warning).

Oh, and then singing an extremely insensitive song about how if you're SA'd, that you're not unique and to continue to be a "coked up dick sucking ho!" That's right, you're a loser baby! A whiny fucking loser for being raped and abused! It's all your fault, you fucking moron! But hey, I have a gambling problem so we're both losers and we can eat shit together!

Seriously... how the fuck aren't people pissed about that song??

Also, Raph sexually harrassed a 15 year old child and Viv victim blamed the child.

How is this woman still a professional showrunner? Why hasn't she fired Raph? (Oh wait because she said she wouldn't on Threads lmao) Why aren't more people outraged?

The rose colored glasses need to come off at some point, people. Your objectively shitty demon shows aren't worth it.

This.

Viv and her cronies are bad news from a professional standpoint, a marketing one, a decency one. They sprung a rape fetish scene on their entire audience and then laughed in the faces of the survivors who criticized it. They don't deserve a platform, and never did.

#Anonymous #vivziepop critical #hazbin hotel critical #hazbin hotel #actual blog post

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mothric · 3 months

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(fair warning, re: ATLA—if you like Katara/Aang as a ship or just don’t wanna see anything anti them as a romance ship, def blacklist anti-Kataang and anti Kataang bc I…………………..reblog & post stuff with those tags, so I don’t wanna accidentally slam your feed with that content if it’ll bum you out ^^;)

thoughts under the cut - tl;dr i am not a huge fan either

no dude i'm... frustrated with kataang. it felt weirdly compulsory to have them kiss at the end when they never had a real conversation about their feelings other than katara saying she was unsure?? plus the kid is twelve, he hasn't even hit puberty yet... idk how you feel about other pairings, but i genuinely thought katara/zuko was endgame for most of the show, or at least leaving it open for them to get together when they're older. i really thought i was picking up on chemistry between them early on and thought that was intentional, that katara/aang was a red herring and that aang would have to learn to let her go as part of his hero's journey, while katara and zuko would have a whole thing about learning to see each other as three dimensional humans with common ground, not just enemies on the opposite sides of a war. (which, to be fair, they did have that growth - but he also let her touch his scar, for pete's sake! the least vulnerable kid in the world who wouldn't let anyone get near it! come on.) with all of the interesting, compelling, and clever writing this show achieved, it was really puzzling to watch them double back on what seemed like a clear setup for these very interesting arcs and go 'actually no, the hero does win the girl at the end because he's the protag and that's how it goes.' like? huh??? my brother in christ then why did you write zuko and katara the way you did and have aang go through all the turmoil he did about having to let go of things.... what

anyway before anybody burns me at the stake (i am quickly learning this is a many-years-long debate with many rabid defenders on either side) keep in mind these are just my impressions as a first-time viewer fresh off finishing this show. i haven't sought out any supplementary content, haven't seen LOK, i know nothing beyond what i have just seen. i don't hate the idea of katara and aang being together period, but for me to feel like it had wings, i'd need to see more natural growth/development of those feelings over time - lots of time, along with literal body-brain development. (again, one of these kids has started puberty and the other has not. when i was fourteen you could not have convinced me to smooch a twelve year old if you paid me. brother eugh)

#i do not want to invoke decades-long ire so i will avoid putting this in the main tag #so i will fill up these tags #with other tags first #so i can tag the show for my own archival purposes #without it turning up in searches #and making people mad #hopefully that works! please spare my life #8 #9 #10 #atla #anti kataang #lionheart ree #thank u kind friend #jul 2024

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bradshawssugarbaby · 11 months

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Timeless - III (Bob Floyd x Reader)

A/N: As promised, part 3 in time for my birthday (scheduled to post at the exact minute I was born bc why not)! It's not my finest work, but I'm relatively happy with it. Also, I done goofed and gave OC a name but tagged it as "x reader" - please feel free to just pretend the character's name isn't there, I just didn't want to write "Y/N" over and over and over again - it's written from the reader's perspective so I'm leaving it as "x reader" (also bc I'm lazy and like the parts to all match so).

pairing: Lt. Robert Floyd x reader

warnings/content: mutual pining, some angst, swearing, mildly steamy makeout sesh, Bob drops a bombshell on miss girl.

word count: 1.6k

one - two - three -

You blinked slowly as you tried to comprehend what Bob had just said. You looked at him in disbelief, letting out an awkward laugh as you felt your blood beginning to boil at his words. As much as you’d missed him, pined for him, and longed for him over the last decade, you were frustrated by the fact that this could have been avoided easily ten years ago if you or Bob had just swallowed your pride and said something to one another. While you knew you were just as much to blame on that part, it was Bob who walked away in the end, and in this moment, you couldn’t help but resent him for leaving you, then proclaiming he missed you for so long without ever so much as attempting to make contact. He at least could have asked his mother to speak to yours and provide him the contact information necessary to talk to you - you didn’t have that luxury, a) because he was often away at sea, and b) because he had left you without as much as a goodbye, leaving you under the impression that he didn’t want to see you. For some reason, hearing Bob’s admission made something inside you snap, you suddenly felt bitter and cold towards him for leaving you in the first place.

“You missed me? Do I need to remind you that it was YOU who walked away 10 years ago? Christ, Bobby, you didn’t even have the balls to come say goodbye to me before you fucked off,” you spat angrily.

“Listen, Krissy, let me explain,” Bob began, a pleading look in his eyes as he tried to calm you down.

“First of all, my name is Kristen. No one has called me Krissy in years. Not since you left. Secondly, I’ve been waiting, praying, hoping you’d call me. You don’t get to come back after years and hit me with this romantic “I’ve missed you so much” bullshit when you haven’t even as much as attempted to get ahold of me over the years. Do you know how many nights I spend crying when you left, wondering what the hell I did wrong to not deserve a goodbye from you? I thought I was finally over you too, and then you show back up here and remind me all over again just how fucking much I loved you. How much I still love you, and how no other man is ever going to compare to you,” You exhaled sharply as you finished ranting, shaking your head as hot tears stung your cheeks as they fell.

“Wait, you love me?” Bob frowned as he shook his head, his blue eyes welling up with tears as he looked at you.

“For fuck sake, Bob, out of all that, this is what part stuck with you? Not the part about me needing an explanation as to why the hell you thought it was ok to just abandon your best friend?”

Before you could continue ranting, you felt Bob’s lips crash into yours, his hands firmly grabbing your waist to pull you into his body. His grip on you was tight and passionate as his lips continued to kiss at yours, and you couldn’t help but moan softly as his tongue gently traced along your bottom lip, almost begging for entry to your mouth. You pulled away breathlessly and shook your head, looking at Bob with a completely bewildered stare.

“Care to explain that outburst, Lieutenant Floyd?” You raised an eyebrow at him and folded your arms across your chest, your gaze intense enough to make Bob worry he’d burst into flames if you didn’t look away from him.

“Listen, Kristen, I’ve always loved you. I assumed you just…didn’t.” He shrugged his shoulders sheepishly as he blushed, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose, “I wanted to tell you, I really did, but every time I got myself psyched up to do it, I’d chicken out and back off. And then I sort of tried to forget about you - threw myself into my naval career, made sure I was one of the best WSOs in the United States, got into Top Gun, I tried my damnest to forget you, Kristen. I really did.”

Bob let out a sigh as he shook his head, his blonde hair becoming perfectly tousled as it broke free from its uniform combed back look. He frowned at you before opening his mouth, hesitating before he spoke, his voice almost in a whisper as the words came out.

“I couldn’t forget about you no matter how hard I tried. I tried dating and throwing myself into my career, I tried forcing myself to see a future with other women, but no matter how hard I tried to force it, it just made me realize I wanted you more. Then I came home and found out you’d moved to New York from Mama, and I wanted to go there and see you - I’d fully planned on coming over here and asking your folks where you lived so I could go visit, try and convince you to listen to me and give me the chance I know that I don’t deserve, and then, as I was getting my coffee the other day, planning on how the fuck I was going to do this all, you walked in and complete threw me off guard, but I love it. It just reminded me more that…that this is the right thing to do, Kristen. I could leave the entire US Navy behind, just walk away and never look back, but I cannot in good conscience leave South Carolina without telling you how I feel.”

You sighed softly, shaking your head and frowning as your gaze met the floor, completely at a loss for words. You wanted so badly to stay mad at him for leaving without a word, but hearing that Bob had felt the same way you had for the last ten years, it made you soften towards him once again, another gentle sigh escaping your lips before you spoke, looking up to meet his cobalt blue eyes once again.

“Robert Floyd, are you saying that you love me as much as I love you?” You finally said, letting out a sharp breath that you hadn’t even realized you’d been holding in.

“I believe that’s exactly what I’m saying, Kristen.” He laughed softly, raising an eyebrow as he gently reached his hand out to touch your cheek, wiping a tear away with his thumb, “I never wanted to hurt you, Krissy. I just, I was a shy and awkward 18 year old who was in love with my best friend, and I didn’t know how to tell you. I was scared you’d reject me and I decided I’d rather live with the fact that you just didn’t know how I felt, than risk telling you and you shooting me down faster than I can shoot down an enemy aircraft.”

“For a smart man, you’re kind of a dumbass, you know that, Lieutenant Floyd?” You laughed and shook your head to rid your eyes of any remaining tears that threatened to fall.

“I know I am,” Bob grinned at you, leaning in to kiss at your cheek, just below your ear. As he pressed his lips to your soft skin, he murmured sweetly into your ear, “But, I’m your favourite dumbass, right?”

You felt Bob’s lips turn up into a smile against your cheek, his face hovering against your skin for a moment longer as he took in the familiar scent of your perfume, the same one you’d worn since you’d turned 16 years old. His hand found his way around the small of your back as his lips trailed across your cheek playfully. When he pulled away, he gently tucked your hair behind your ear and smiled.

“What happens now? Because, knowing how you feel now, I can’t leave for San Diego without us deciding what to do about it.”

As you were about to answer, you heard your brother calling up the stairs to you both.

“Hey, Ma says to hurry it up with the serving trays, and Dad says to stop fooling around up there like a coupl’a teenagers on prom night,” You could hear your brother’s laughter echoing from the bottom of the attic staircase as he spoke. Your sister’s giggle could be heard in unison with his, and you shook your head as you shot Bob a sympathetic look.

“Nice to see they haven’t changed in the slightest,” Bob laughed softly as he grabbed two of the serving trays and smiled before leaning in to give you a peck on the cheek, “I should probably head back to my Ma’s for dinner before she starts sending out a search party, but maybe after Thanksgiving dinner is over, we can talk?” His voice sounded hopeful as he spoke.

“Absolutely,” You nodded quickly, trying to stop your cheeks from turning bright scarlet red as he kissed you, “On one condition though,” you started.

“What’s that?”

“You promise to keep kissing me until you make me blush,” You smirked at him as you kissed his cheek, carefully straightening out his hair for him before sending him back downstairs to where your family was surely all discussing the possibilities of what could have taken place between you both in that attic.

#lt. bob floyd x reader #lt. robert floyd #lt. bob floyd #robert bob floyd #robert bob floyd x reader #bob floyd x reader #bob floyd #lt. robert floyd x reader #top gun maverick fanfiction

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queerdiazs · 9 months

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2023 fic writing review

rules and tags below the cut because phew, it got long!

rules: feel free to show whatever stats you have. only want to show ao3 stats? rock on. want to include some quantitative info instead of stats? please do this. want to change how yours is presented? absolutely do that.

words and fics

words: 237, 627

most recent: the house i built is burning, where eddie and buck's house burns down, oops

longest fic: technically this, but it's actually deck the halls (and your in-laws), where the diaz and buckley parents show up to spend christmas with the boys, oh my

shortest fic: i love you best when you're just yourself, where buck's in his head about picking out a christmas tree

favorite fic: tied between the dinosaurs smelled magnolias, where eddie proposes to buck with his dick inside buck, and but i've got my teeth in you, where buck gets a tooth knocked out and eddie is Normal about it

most kudos: the side effects of eating too many clementines, where eddie realizes he's in love with buck over oranges in his kitchen

least kudos: mississsippi, where eddie and buck indulge in piss play

events

bad things happen bingo, round one

upcoming events and projects for the new year

finish hoa eddie, who's halfway done at 33k

continue to work on my bad things happen bingo card

clementines smut

5+1(+1) fic where eddie asks buck to marry him

wildfire fic

soft dom eddie series

eddie and buck post-lightning strike

bobby nash's guide to surviving evan buckley and eddie diaz

backdraft au

bullrider buck and rodeo clown eddie au

alpha/alpha buck and eddie

911angstinautumn?

spur of the moment fics i'm sure will wiggle in my brain

achievements

published 20 fics for buck/eddie in 7 months which is so fucking cool

met a lot of really cool people (TENTOESDOWN will live in infamy)

wrote over 50k in the month of december because i decided to challenge myself, jesus christ

goals

write and publish at least 25 fics

learn to edit pictures

finally rewatch s1

write more fics from buck's pov

(at the sake of being ooey gooey, 2023 has been kind to me in the sense i've figured out my future and fallen back in a fandom that's so fun and fresh and enjoyable i can't get enough of it. lots of that is because of the people i surround myself with, and i'm not going to get every individual person but i love you guys lots and i really, really mean that. can't wait to see what 2024 brings us 🥂)

i was tagged by @hippolotamus, @monsterrae1, @exhuastedpigeon, @wikiangela, @honestlydarkprincess, @theotherbuckley, @jamespearce9-1-1, @jesuisici33, @thewolvesof1998, @callmenewbie, and @devirnis <3

tagging @spagheddiediaz and @jeeyuns because they'll yell at me if i don't

#i know i did this weeks late but i wanted to wait till i had all the numbers okay 😭#and it got so fucking long for no goddamn reason but it's FINE #it's an hour and a half till midnight here and i think i am going to bed before then #tag games

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cadybear420 · 6 months

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Cadybear's Reviews- My Two First Loves

Welcome to the twenty-seventh official Cadybear's Reviews! Today I'll be talking about My Two First Loves, which I have ranked on the "Rotting Flesh Tier" at 2 stars out of a possible 10. My last and only playthrough of this was back in April-June 2021.

Oh boy! Oh boy oh boy oh boy! I could write a whole essay on everything wrong with this…

So I will.

To put it briefly: this story feels like it was adapted from a Wattpad story that was written by a 12-year-old whose only ever exposure to high school media and depictions of teenage sexuality was Glee, and then had serious queer and mature themes slapped onto it in order to make it seem better. Y’know, the equivalent of trying to polish a turd.

Or, heck, it’s probably PB’s attempt at ripping off “The Kissing Booth”, seeing as both have a MC in a love triangle between her childhood best friend and a bad boy named Noah, after all. Which, funnily enough, was also originally adapted from some tween’s Wattpad story. That’s about the equivalent to a dog eating some rotten food, shitting it out, then another dog finds it, eats it, and then shits it right out again. And THEN that second dog’s owner comes along to try to polish that double-toured turd.

Number 1: The LGBTQ+ tag is clearly an attempt to appease the queer players that they probably think are being whiny.

Ava’s arc about realizing she’s a lesbian who had been experiencing compulsory heterosexuality is pretty solid in a vacuum. But her being an LI was so blatantly only a last-minute decision PB made during the writing process, and it shows because Ava’s CG just uses her game sprite while Mason’s and Noah’s are fresh art.

MC starts to fall for Ava sometime around at least 30 chapters in, but we don’t get to officially pursue her as a romance option until about 70 chapters in. I get delaying her as a love interest a bit because of the whole thing with MC realizing she’s bi, but even then, there’s just so few opportunities for building any kind of relationship with her that it hardly feels authentic.

Speaking of, MC’s supposed bi awakening is completely rushed and treated with about as much value as a Family Guy cutaway gag, even outside of Ava being sidelined. As someone who realized I wasn’t straight three years ago and is still questioning if I’m bi or straight, I understand that people take different amounts of time to figure out their sexuality. But this MC does not spend any period of time figuring out her bisexuality. She basically just goes “Welp, guess I’m bi now”, and then it’s back to being indecisive as per usual except now there’s a female love interest in the mix too.

To add insult to injury, "discussions of sexuality" is placed in a "player discretion" warning, alongside "racial tensions" and "occasionally violence" to boot. How the fuck is discussion of sexuality even remotely on the same level as either of those? If they meant discussions or depictions of homophobia then maybe I could understand… but I don’t even recall seeing any depictions of homophobia in the book, so including this in the freaking warning tags is pointless at best and kind of insulting at worst.

Not to mention, plenty of other Choices books like MOTY, ILS, D&D, etc. have had discussions about sexuality/LGBTQ+ stuff before, and didn't have to warn us about it. Not even MAH, a later book which had discussions about freaking conversion therapy for Christ’s sake. Sure, some of those books did have content warnings, but they were generally vague and/or mainly warned for violence, and didn’t warn specifically for depictions of queerphobia or discussions of sexuality. Yet for some reason, MTFL feels the need to include a player discretion warning for sexuality discussions, even though it contains far less harsher queer themes.

Number 2: The portrayal of teen sexuality in this does not feel earnest.

Let me just say, I found it very jarring how this one was much more sexually charged compared to PB’s other high school books. PB is usually way more “safe” and PG-13 at most when writing high school characters. Even in books like ROD and WEH, where the characters are 18+ and do have smutty scenes, it’s clear that those books are a lot more restricted compared to the adult cast books.

I mean, with WEH, the safeness makes sense– it was meant to be a serious and tender story from the start, and it does actually follow through on those themes. But ROD feels like it could have easily been as horny with its writing as MTFL was, what with being about a studious “good girl” who goes rebellious. In fact, the story’s loading screen was pretty infamous at first for looking “steamier” than other covers and loading screens.

In actuality though, ROD had only, what, one smut scene? And despite a lot of MC’s outfits being revealing or arguably sensual, there are practically no moments where MC fawned over how “sexy” a revealing diamond outfit looked. Like, I’m pretty sure there were just little to no sexually charged scenes in general.

My point is, whatever compelled PB to make MTFL *this* sexualized is beyond me. My guess is the fact that PB called this one a story about “navigating sexuality” and thus wanted to focus more on the aspects of sexuality, but if that’s the case… hoo boy, did they do a terrible job at it.

I don’t really care about the hypersexualized writing of the teenage characters on its own, or how the characters were initially not confirmed 18+ when the earlier smut scenes were written. What I find far more important is the fact that this sort of cliche and formulaic hypersexualized writing is in a book that markets itself as being about “a young woman navigating love and sexuality for the first time”.

Teens do indeed have sex and can be all over the place with their hormones and sexuality. A lot of us have been there in some way, myself included. And there are ways to talk about that type of stuff in a manner that is silly and/or exaggerated, but still earnest and respectful. But the particular way that MTFL handles super-horny teen sexuality, specifically while claiming to be a coming-of-age story, is neither earnest nor respectful.

The way this story handles these sorts of topics is the writing equivalent to doing a surgery with Fisher-Price toy surgery tools. It’s genuinely difficult to take MC “navigating her sexuality for the first time” seriously when has to constantly blubber about how Mason and Noah are so muscular or how a diamond outfit has “naughty little thigh highs” or how she wants to do a “down and dirty” cheer routine with Ava for Mason and Noah.

That last one especially feels like the kind of stuff we’d see more in a campy chick flick that doesn’t take itself seriously. Honestly, if this was a more campy high school book with the tone of DLS or the 2023 movie “Bottoms”, it probably wouldn’t be as glaring. But in a book that markets itself as a coming-of-age story, the tone feels completely off and the whole book honestly felt like it couldn't decide what it wanted to be.

(Also, while we’re on this topic of MC’s premium outfits, I really fucking despise how MC gets so upset about wearing "mom clothes" if you choose to wear the free modest clothing instead of the revealing diamond outfit in Chapter 2. Ugh. Yes, the dad was being shitty about not letting MC dress how she likes, but all it does is it just makes you feel like shit for not wanting to dress in more revealing clothes. Stop making me feel bad for wanting to wear simple non-revealing clothing. Same goes for you, Chris Romantic Getaway story with your “the regular jerseys aren’t cute enough for girls to wear, we have to cut one up into a cleavage crop top in order to make it good for us girls to wear” bullshit.)

And it just slaps you in the face with these sexual moments too, placing them in frequently whenever it feels like it, and the amount of it that actually contributed to any coming-of-age navigating-sexuality are few and far between. Honestly, it felt like it was trying way too hard to look "mature" with how it handled sexuality (as well as some of the other stuff like them drinking alcohol). Like it maybe was trying to portray teens realistically, but it only does so at a very shallow level.

It's literally just "Look at the teens that talk about sex and like doing sexy things and having sex and doing grown-up stuff like drinking alcohol, see how MATUUURRREEE they are!" and they don't do anything more with it. It's just tacked on so they can pretend their book is a realistic story about maturing/being mature, when it fails at actually doing so.

I mean, I guess you could argue that the MC is meant to be seen as more messy and hormonal. And in that case, I could give it a pass. But, again, MC’s supposed arc of “navigating sexuality” never goes anywhere from that until the very last few chapters where you choose which LI she ends up with. It’s pretty much the same crap all throughout the book. MC doesn’t navigate sexuality, she just runs around aimlessly in it like a chicken with its head cut off.

Number 3: All the serious themes they try to have in the story are overshadowed by MC’s stupid indecisiveness plot.

I’ve already said MTFL tries way too hard to make its story seem “mature” with the trashy way it sexualizes its characters. I’ve said it feels like it doesn’t know what it wants to be. Honestly though, this just sums up MTFL’s writing in general.

MTFL has quite a handful of subplots, and I will admit, all of them are pretty compelling. You have Ava figuring out she’s lesbian, Mack dealing with gang drama, and Mason and Noah dealing with their past and Mason’s dad’s abusive behaviors. And an admittedly decent arc about MC discovering her love for photography instead of cheerleading.

And then you have MC going on about how she can’t decide between her love interests, which is just the bad apple of the bunch that ruins the rest. It just makes it very hard to take everything else seriously. You ever seen that one meme where the Power Rangers put their hands in a circle but then a Teletubbie tries to join in? It’s the writing-equivalent to that, and MC’s indecisiveness plot is the Teletubbie.

And maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if MC’s indecisiveness wasn’t the main focus plot of the whole book. I want to take these other storylines seriously. I want to take this story as a whole seriously. But how can I when the main focus of the story is so god damn shallow? No matter how many "soft positive heartfelt" piano tracks and “so sad and tragic sad” piano tracks from WEH they try put over it, it doesn't change the fact that the focus is MC going on and on about being unable to choose between Mason, Noah, and Ava.

I get teens are shallow and can have shallow issues, but did we really need it to be that big of a focus of the story? Especially when the way it handles it is completely empty? Something like OG HSS was great because even though a lot of the issues the characters had were seemingly shallow and basic (such as the band fighting over which song to play), they do give a little more depth to it and reason to care about it (ie. Aiden starts to feel like a failure at music because of the band infighting). MTFL just throws MC’s indecisiveness at you for 95 chapters and expects you to take it seriously with nothing else surrounding it.

And they try to pull the twist on the title at the end where it’s all like “LI and photography, the two greatest loves of MC’s life”. Which is an interesting idea in concept, except it feels so artificial and non-earned when MC’s romance plot was spending 95 chapters being unable to decide between the LIs.

Number 4: It reuses way too much from HSS.

I know this is a less severe issue, but I just can’t get past it. Sprites, backgrounds, school colors… even plot points like the corrupt principal embezzling from the school, or MC and LI(s) being locked in a large school room (remember when HSS:CA MC and Ajay were locked in the auditorium?). Heck, even MC having lost her mom and having a photography passion connected to that, rings way too similar to one of Autumn’s arcs from the freaking HSS PRIME GAME! Oh yeah, and both of those characters have a love triangle with a golden boy and a bad boy. Holy hell.

Easily the most noticeable part is the sprites. In my playthrough, I counted 7 whole HSS sprites that were used in MTFL: Sydney became Iris, Payton became Toni, Frank became this random kid in a flashback for Mason and Noah's past, Morgan became a kid in Elijah's gang named Lucy, Lorenzo became Chad, Aiden's mom became Asian Noah's mom, Skye's dad became White Mason's dad (PB really said use that sprite for abusive dads huh). And there’s probably more, I’m sure.

And the worst offense? They even reuse the iconic bird's-eye view of Berry High in MTFL. Call me petty if you must, but that's just criminal. It's one thing to reuse and alter a bunch of the sprites, uniforms, and backgrounds from the series but to reuse another book series' iconic background like that? Honestly, it feels rather insulting. They couldn't even be arsed to change the "Go Tigers!" on the football field, that’s how little sense it makes to use that background outside of HSS. Fuck’s sake.

I know it’s kind of the norm for Choices to reuse assets throughout different series, but the fact that they do it so much here and majority of it is from HSS just rubs me the wrong way. At best, it’s jarring and lazy. And at worst, it comes off as trying way too hard to be a “more mature” version of HSS. When in reality, it makes HSS:CA’s side characters look like Citizen Kane in comparison. I mean, at least Clint and Natalie and MC stopped whinging about Rory ⅓rd of the way through the series.

At least when other high-school-setting books like ROD, WEH, and ILITW were made, they at least somewhat bothered to change up a few things and make it feel like an actually different school. They changed up the backgrounds a bit, used different school colors and uniforms, and didn’t reuse nearly as many sprites from HSS.

In MTFL, all they did was make new cheer uniforms for the non-reused sprites and remove the Berry High logos from everything HSS that they used. Yeah they made some changes, but it’s clear that they didn’t put nearly the same amount of effort into it as they did in the other high school setting books.

All it does is just make me miss HSS. Like, stop toying with my heart by piggybacking off of a better series (that has better queer rep too) so much. It’s to the point where it feels like they should have just used the time making this book to instead make a HSS senior year (Which, y’know, would be nice, especially since the sendoff we got in HSS:CA 3 was absolute flaming fucking garbage).

So… in all honesty, I don’t hate this book. But it had a lot of things that annoyed me to no end and it sure as fuck is disappointing wasted potential. It had a great opportunity to be a nice queer coming-of-age story. But instead it felt like a Kissing Booth rip-off with serious themes only hamfisted in order to make it seem more “mature”.

#choices stories you play #choices #choices game #choices stories we play fandom #choices stories we play #choices mtfl #mtfl #my two first loves #choices my two first loves

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ronsenthal · 9 months

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Hello everybody!!!

I would like to wish a Happy New Year for you and your loved ones, hope you had fun and quality time last night, pretty sure I'll be completely wasted for a couple of days!!!

I want to thank you all again for making me feel so loved, appreciated and welcomed in here, specially the BoB fandom!!! Every kind comment and interaction nurtured me into keep going forward.

It was my first time writing fanfics and showing it to other people, I still have so much to learn and to improve and I promise I'll work hard for it. I already have some WIPs and I can't wait to show you!!!

It's been a long time ago in a galaxy far far away since I've been part of a fandom and certainly the first time in many years that I'm truly proud of my edits because finally I am able to enjoy the process once again, challenge myself and get better, all thanks to the incredible support you guys gave me since day n. 1 here, for that I'm extremely and forever grateful 💙

And now *Ron's voice* school circle!!! I have some announcements:

- I prepared some edits that I'm going to post in the next couple of days, because apparently now I am a creative machine!!!

- I'll try to reply all the messages and mentions I got as soon as can, be patient

- I finally finished Fierce Valor but I don't want to spam the tags so it's also all saved on my drafts waiting for the lights out to away it go (sorry for the F1 lame joke)

- In a rush of sugar high induced by ridiculous amounts of good desserts (thanks to my family) and maybe 2 energy drinks I had to endure the madness of the Australian time zone (thanks to my love for tennis and Andy Murray) I've organized and updated the about me page and also now I have this totally cool new directory for my works, all for the desktop version of my blog!! But if you only use the mobile app don't worry, you can still use my masterlist ✨

- Last but not least remember to drink your water, eat some fruits and vegetables, wash your hands, use sunscreen, water your plants for Christ' sake and give some love to your pets!

Happy New Year, love you all!!!

#mw*

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smashy-headcanons · 1 year

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So I watched the Super Mario Movie finally

(Actually I watched it on and off with some friends but wanted to wait until I saw the full thing until I said anything. Also at the time of posting it's actually been like a month and a half oops.)

This does mean that I'll be allowing posts about it (I will make sure to tag spoilers tho).

Many excitements, many concerns, all questions finally answered (for now). Of course, I have many thoughts. Sooo, dump time!

I consider the movieverse to be an AU rather than directly tying to the game universe. Yoshi's Island supports the idea of Mario and Luigi being born in the Mushroom Kingdom (or that universe, anyways) while the movie has them living in a more realistic setting.

As we expected, Jack Black as Bowser? 👌

I originally thought that there would be multiple power stars instead of just the one, and that Bowser would be going kingdom to kingdom to collect them. I feel like it wasn’t given as much importance as it probably should have gotten.

SMB Super Show theme makes a return! They’re really pulling stuff from everywhere.

Just so I don’t sound like a broken record I’ll only say it once. The role for Mario should’ve gone to Charles Martinet. Pratt wasn’t grating but it really did just sound like Just Some Guy the whole time. I get Mario is our isekai protagonist but come on.

Following up on that thought: Good fucking lord the “do you think the accents were a bit much” line pissed me off SO much. Poking fun at your franchise is one thing, but announcing the first movie for the franchise in 30 years, giving the titular character’s voice cast to a guy who sounds nothing like him for the sake of Big Name Actor instead of to his original voice actor, telling people upset at the choice to essentially shut the fuck up, and THEN proceeding to joke about the— Jesus Christ I can’t type this anymore. On to the rest of the review.

Ohhh my god the Bros.' relationship is SO good in this movie. Luigi's adoration of his bro, Mario's adoration but also embarrassment at Luigi bringing up their mom, Mario IMMEDIATELY getting ready to throw hands for Luigi's honor, their MUTUAL protectiveness towards each other, it's all just *chef's kiss*.

When they announced Spike as a character I didn't think it was going to be Foreman Spike from Wrecking Crew (good reference tho) I thought Spike was going to be this thing

As unexpected as it came to me, I actually really liked them making Mario the underdog of the family. It adds motive to Mario's eagerness to be Helpful and gives him a good reason to stay in the Mushroom Kingdom at the end. I can also see this attitude shifting to Luigi in the sequel.

Pauline cameo hell yeah.

I actually like Toad in this movie--both his voice AND his role.

I love that they made the Dry Bones so... eerie. I would've liked to see some sentience from them (at least in a later scene), but I can understand that doing so would likely take away from the eeriness.

If you wanna see Mario being a pathetic wet paper towel then you will enjoy this movie.

I have... mixed feelings about this version of Peach. On one hand, I love that she's taking a more proactive role and that we get to see her as both a ruler and protector of the Toads. On the other hand, I'm. not particularly fond of how she treats Mario in the first half. Peach as a character has been defined by amicability and kindness towards both new and familiar people from the beginning, so her initial rudeness doesn't feel very "Peach", if that makes sense. It makes sense that she'd assume Mario to be an enemy, but after that point it stops feeling in-character.

The more serious tone they gave with Bowser was also something to wrap my brain around. Over the course of the games Bowser's been gradually "declawed" as a villain, so I love that they really put emphasis on his cruelty.

I'm surprised they actually touched on Peach's origins, if only briefly.

I love Donkey Kong's portrayal in this movie. A lot of games don't give him much personality beyond "monkey lol" so I love that they took his other personality traits and expanded on those.

Cranky Kong running a kingdom wasn't the role I expected, but it is a fun take that I like.

Wrinkly Kong isn't dead lol

Diddy Kong having to be told to be quiet was a fun touch.

Funky Kong cameo improves my opinion on the movie. However he is hard to get a look at and doesn't have speaking lines, so that score must sadly be reduced a little.

One of the few allusions to Bowser and King Boo's alliance we get. King Boo didn't stick around to help during the fight, but he did make it to the wedding so that was cool.

RIP to King Bob-omb. Poor dude didn't deserve what happened to him 😔

Peaches (the song) was funny but not what it was hyped up to be.

Sequel with Yoshi hinted after the credits 👀

No Bowser Jr. or Koopalings despite everything. I'm wondering if they'll put him in the sequel.

Uhhhh I'm not sure what else I can remember, but this is long enough as it is. I had some nitpicks with it but I did like it despite my complaints.

#super mario movie #mario #luigi #princess peach #king bowser #mario movie spoilers #mine #long post #not a headcanon

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bookshelfmonkey · 2 years

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So I've been having thoughts about Izzy Hands.

But first, a disclaimer: this is meant to be an insight into my thought process. I know that I'm not always the best at examining media from a fully detached, critical perspective (but are any of us, really). I'm taking what I would see as a fairly neutral standpoint, trying to see and understand both sides of the coin. I'm not tagging this as hate, because it isn't intended to be, but if you think I should add any further warnings, please do let me know. Also, if you want to share your opinions, in the comments, tags, reblogs or in messages/asks to me, please do, but any straight-up hate comments (towards other users) will be deleted and I will block you.

Now, a small essay.

Honestly, when I initially watched the show, I didn't like Izzy, and when I came on here and saw people defending his character, I was confused, but y'all have some good points. I might have been somewhat convinced.

Here's the thing: Izzy is not a good character. None of the characters are. They're pirates for christ's sake. They have to be bad/selfish people to survive. Stede is very unique in his generosity towards the crew and, many times, he nearly pays very dearly for that. Obviously Izzy is uneasy with this new guy coming in and assuming half of the control of the ship (also essentially demoting him). Yes, he wants power, but that isn't a trait unique to him, and it's probably not unreasonable given the amount of shit he's probably been through at Ed's side (how many jobs have been "outsourced" to him, I wonder). It's reasonable that he's pissed that he's been overlooked and it's very reasonable that he's wary of Stede, someone who (at least in his outward appearance) represents the British aristocracy, a force that was almost definitely hugely oppressive in his, and many other pirates' lives (you don't become a pirate if you already have all the wealth you need, Stede is very much an outlier in this case).

Secondly, Izzy doesn't necessarily see much (if any) of Stede and Ed's emotional bonding. He doesn't learn (as Ed does) that Stede can be trusted and (given Ed's reckless behaviour), doesn't immediately trust his judgement on Stede and immediately trust him. Not to mention that, to the best of his knowledge, Ed is simply failing to meet the goal that he set (killing Stede) and just seems to be procrastinating the whole thing. You could even go as far as to say that Izzy fundamentally believes that Stede needs to be killed (he is, after all, a rival captain) and is trying to protect Ed from the pain of getting to know him and love him then having to kill him.

There's also the element of Izzy's (potential, I can't remember any solid evidence of this, but my memory is unreliable at best, so please correct me) past relationship with Ed. He potentially still has feelings for Ed and here comes this new guy who, again, represents everything they've worked against, coming in and taking Ed from him, changing him into someone wholly unfamiliar.

But there is another side to this story. I think, definitely as the viewers, we're encouraged to get invested in Ed and Stede's romance from the beginning. We see them grow closer and learn to trust each other and Izzy gets in the way of them achieving this goal. It's natural, as consumers of media, to get frustrated about this and to dislike the "obstacle". We also see how Ed grows and changes as a person, becoming happier and generally more content in his life. To us, it can seem that Izzy is trying to get in the way of this for his own personal gain and, to be fair, there's very little chance that Izzy doesn't know what he's doing to some extent.

And, building on my earlier point about Stede representing the aristocracy, it does not help Izzy's case that he turns to the British navy for help.

Ultimately, everyone on this show is at least a little bit fucked up and morals are completely out of the window. It's all just emotions and shit, so watch your emotions as you respond to media and please don't harass others.

I'm still not too sure why people hold such strong opinions on this, but I guess I did just write multiple paragraphs on it.

Again, please do respond. I want to talk to people.

#our flag means death #ofmd #izzy hands #my posts

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theliterarywolf · 1 year

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Hey look, I get it, it's frustrating to see all that drama about the MLP debacle revolving around porn. You're tired of it, lord knows you're right to feel that way

But dude, me and you are nearly the same age so I'm pretty sure you remember way back when on YouTube how stupid easy it was for kids to stumble upon those gory shock cartoons of the ponies

Like the one literally drawn exactly in the shows style? With Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash dancing?? To this day that video is still not age restricted

The derpy hooves one where her head is smashed with an anvil???

Or hotdiggydemons .mov series where he intentionally drew it to look bright, colorful and eye catching?

You couldn't even google their stupid fucking names without seeing gross fetish porn of the technicolor horses and half the shit is still visible even with safe search on!

I get what you're saying that some of those kids should've been monitored better, but at the end of the day, most of the fandom comprised of grown ass adult men who should've done better at hiding that awful shit

for Christ's sake the fandoms of Steven Universe and Undertale had a tagging system for their adult works!

See, on the one hand I would agree with you...

But, as per my personal experience? Way back when in the brony days, I had to go out of my way to find the particularly heinous shite. I had to go out of my way to figure out why everyone kept recoiling from the term 'Chrysalis.SWF'

The first time I saw the Derpy Hooves anvil thing was in a Saberspark video.

I didn't even really find out about things like the infamous Rainbow Dash jar or the Lyra plushie until years later after they had broken containment and had a bunch of reaction channels talking about them to say 'bronies are gross and cringe, lol'

(Which, I'm not going to lie, both of those instances were pretty damn gross and cringe)

You couldn't even google their stupid fucking names without seeing gross fetish porn of the technicolor horses and half the shit is still visible even with safe search on!

That's EVERY FANDOM, THOUGH! Have you tried looking up Lucy Loud? Gardevoir? Any of the core Super Mario cast (which, with the advent of the movie, Lord help any kid whose parents just hand them a phone to shut them up) Hermione Granger?

Hell, for all that they were 'controversial', I never saw actual pages/art for 'Ask Molestia' and 'Lil Miss Rarity' until I joined tumblr.

And the Brony Fandom at least had Safe Search Wrap-Up, so there was a conscientious effort to keep NSFW content away from lax filters and vulnerable minors.

But do you know why for as much fucked up content was going around, not just for MLP but for other kid-friendly IP fandoms too, I only found out about the bulk of it later or after digging for it?

Because I was raised with basic internet safety. Don't go clicking on every video/picture just because they look like something you're familiar with.

I agree that, even in the current year, that appropriate tagging is a problem. However, the other glaring maw in the situation is people thinking that the internet is people acting like they can just treat it like a family fun-zone when, really, it isn't. And that includes some of what you would think are the most mundane things: like kid-friendly IPs or vague everyday items.

...Seriously, I am this close to just nuking 'Food' from my trending tab list because every time I scroll down to it on Twitter, it's filled with a dozen D-tier E-Thots shoving their tits into the camera or bending over 90 degrees, going 'Can I be your lunch, uwu~?'

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variousqueerthings · 2 years

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my thoughts keep circling back to father mulcahy, because i really don’t know what to make of him. he’s the least drawn of the main characters, but with some strong moments that one can zero in on + there’s a heavy dose of “bringing ones own relationship to organised religion to the read” for me

I feel like mulcahy was more meant to represent a certain kind of religious figure than was given as much of an opportunity to be a man, and one can tell because he’s never presented as being in the wrong, or as in a grey zone in his decision-making (i remember, there may be an episode ive forgotten?)

his biggest issue from the beginning to the end is wondering how much good he’s doing, but there is never a time where the other characters (+ the narrative) doesn’t seek to assure him that everything he’s doing is right and good, except for I’d argue his sequence in dreams, which is also my favourite mulcahy moment

i also keep circling back to that soldier who takes a dead soldier’s dog-tags so he can be sent home and mulcahy’s response is to go hard on thou shalt not lie and how the other guy’s family might feel, and so he sends a massively traumatised man back to the front through guilt

and i kind of loved that because it was an example of the ways in which mulcahy can have very black-and-white thinking, but the episode never framed it adequately as a complicated situation. the soldier sees his wrong and goes back, the end. kind of want to write a fic where he then dies. where what mulcahy got out of that was two dead men instead of one

I definitely would never think that MASH should be remade, but i think if it was then some of that might have been able to be explored more, simply because of the conversation around christianity in particular now vs in the 70s. and of course in a modern version of this, there might be bigger questions about why all the orphanages in the area seem to be run by white Catholics, but i will take it in the spirit intended in the show + i definitely wouldn’t argue to make/reinterpret mulcahy as a “darker” character so to speak, for the sake of some unneeded grimdark take you would risk getting nowadays

they were trying to say something about how one can be a religious figure that works for the betterment of others and is sincere in both belief and desire to help. (and i’m sure in the written/directed by alan alda a non-zero amount of ex-catholic emotions). i like that about mulcahy, he reminds me of this one teacher i had (who had quite a rough background and talked openly about it) who came to christianity as an adult and smuggled bibles into the USSR

i simply want to see him being wrong. or at least not knowing if he was right. and i am very interested in the suggestions posed in dreams that poke at his want to be promoted + the blood dripping onto his bible from the christ-soldier

#father mulcahy #MASH #im poking at him... im figuring it out from my perspective...#i think he is especially open to different povs #a character who is too good makes you want to dig for flaws to round them out

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theseancekid · 7 months

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@twicecut sent: "I can't believe they'd publish that."

"Yeah, good to see you too."

He gnaws at his little plastic hospital tag as they step into Diego's dingy back room apartment, but it won't budge. He'll have to borrow a knife to get the damn thing off when Diego's not looking. Of course he knew they'd have to talk about it eventually. For Christ's sake, even on the drive back home from the clinic, they'd passed at least 3 stores with the new Best Seller on display. He can imagine how desperate his brother is to outlet the rage— he'd laughed, at first, as he conjured up the mental image his brother's explosive reaction to some of this shit. Everything from childhood bedwetting to psychological abuse, laid bare and printed in black and white for the world to see. It's actually astounding, when he thinks about it, how Klaus and Diego are both framed as the poor victims of their fathers torment, and still such Grade-A assholes to their sister.

"You gotta admit...it's kinda ballsy though, right?" There's a tiny breathy laugh at the end of his words, but maybe that's simply because the gravity hasn't quite settled in yet. He's not sure it ever will, to be honest. He hopes it doesn't. Because the second it stops being funny, he knows the devastation of having his trauma on bookshelves all over the world is going to tear him apart.

Trembling hands run down the length of his face as he stares at the beat up cover with little Number Seven's face staring right back at him. He tries to focus, but it's so damn hard, there's no way to summarize the absolute shit show in his head, so all he can say is the very first thing he'd been wondering from the get go:

"D'you think Dad knows? Has anyone told him?"

#*【 ☂ ┊ ❛ Better find another superstition ❜ 】 ➤ Answered #a little pre-s1 canon thread :) as a treat :)#twicecut

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hepatosaurus · 2 years

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2022 AO3 Wrapped!

Last year, inspired by some people on discord, I decided to actually track my fic reading for once. I’ve been logging my books and movies for a good 20 years now, so why not try that with fic? I hoped it might help me comment more too, or at least get a sort of baseline number that I could improve on. So, after crunching the numbers: I read 110 fics and 1,188,700 words across 15 fandoms (...more on that last point later)! It was a fun experiment that I’ll definitely do again, with some tweaks. Please forgive any weird numbers/percentages; I haven’t taken a math class in manymany years, and it probably (definitely?) shows. The vibes are accurate, at least.

(I posted an earlier (and shorter) version of this on twitter, but wanted to archive it here too for posterity’s sake because...twitter.)

Word count

This is about what I expected, though I was surprised to see that I only read one 50-100k fic (only one 100k+ fic too, but that doesn’t surprise me at all). I finished up a couple long(er) fic in January (notably, one 200k+ fic), hence the high numbers there, and only read one (1!) fic in July, which explains those low numbers. Otherwise I generally read between 50-100k total per month.

More details behind the cut, aka god damn girl, you sure know what you like and stick with it, huh. (I really hope this text cut works...)

Top Fandoms

So, about those 15 fandoms. I really did think I might have more variety back in January - like maybe I’d be able to chart fandom trends over the months, something like that! - but lol nope. My FE3H fixation is still going strong, three years later. I’ll get to those Witch Hat Atelier and Stranger Things fics in my Marked for Later pile...eventually.

Top Authors

110 fics, 80 authors! There were definitely some repeat offenders: merionettes! desmodus! notallbees! printers_devil! epistrophic! nebulia! No names in the pie chart, but look at those pretty colors. You're all stars.

Top Pairings

No real surprises here. I’ve been in sylvix hell since early 2020 so I knew they’d dominate, but there’s an okay showing from...other Sylvain ships...and gen! and Claude ships! Hi Claude! (Graph cuts off at 20 for my sanity.)

Top Characters

Ha. ha ha ha ha ha ha. Surprise! Listen: I knew Sylvain would be #1, I’m not an idiot. However I did NOT realize he featured in 60% of the fic I read in 2022, jeeeesus christ man. (He’s versatile, okay!!!) Chief Blorbo aside, my Blue Lions/Golden Deer bias persists. Maybe in 2023 I'll read all those Black Eagles fics I saved? Or fic from other fandoms?? (Again, chart cut off at 20 for sanity.)

Tags, Tropes, and Ratings

Looks like I sure read a lot of horny post-canon friends-to-lovers get-together fics with a good dose of pining, huh. That...tracks. Regarding AUs, modern AUs won (14.8%), followed by college/university, canon divergent, and modern with magic. Also fun: figure skating! magical girls! rock band! time loops!

I definitely need to rethink how I track nsfw content though - it’s very inconsistent and redundant here, and doesn’t really tell me anything. The explicit rating is self explanatory, but what’s the deal with those different NSFW and smut numbers? Where did I draw the line? It probably make more sense to scrap the latter tag and just track PWPs.

Etc: Commenting, Rereading, Reccing, and Bookmarks

Commenting: I mentioned earlier that I hoped logging my fic reading would help me comment more, or at least find out how frequently I leave comments, and turns out that number is 46/110, or 41.8%. (Mer reminded me that this number does NOT include alpha reader comments, which is very true. ✨⛸️) Not bad, but I think 50% (or more?) is definitely doable next year. This whole practice really did help me comment more - it made me stop and think about exactly what I did or didn’t like about each fic I read, from <1k vignettes to 200k+ canon retellings. Obviously I’m not telling the authors what I didn’t like, but as for the good stuff...like, I found a lot of compliments hidden in the Comments/Notes field of my spreadsheet that never actually made it to a proper comment, but they definitely could have. I’m never gonna be a person who comments on everything, and I’m NOT going to lie and tell an author that I liked their fic when I really...didn’t? but: 50%. I think I can do that.

(also I cannot emphasize enough how great it was to have a completely private space to bitch about terrible (or not-so-terrible) fanfic. does this fic use too many repetitive epithets? does that author NOT understand Character Y at ALL? was the resolution to this otherwise decent fic just a liiiittle too rushed? tell it to the google form!!! A+ would recommend.)

Rereads: As expected! I don’t reread a ton, with some exceptions. (Honestly a lot of my non-FE fics this year were rereads of old favorites.)

Bookmarks: Without double-checking, I think I bookmarked fewer fics compared to previous years, mostly because I was already keeping track of them in my spreadsheet. I’d like to get a little better at consciously bookmarking fic going forward, though - it’s really handy to have a public, easily accessible list of my faves. (I also say this as someone who frequently raids the public bookmarks of other commenters/authors/etc.)

Recs: 46.4% “yes”! interesting. Only one hard no, and that was partially my fault for not reading tags/warnings correctly.

In an ideal world I’d have some actual fic recs here too, but that...did not happen.

Overall!

This was a fun and very satisfying experiment, especially as someone who loves tracking things. I know a lot of people hate the idea of having an actual/official AO3 Wrapped, and honestly I wouldn’t like that either, but it was fun to actively (and manually) subject myself to this particular Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known Through Fanfic Tropes. I DO think it made me read fic a little more...deliberately? And therefore I read a little less fic than normal, maybe. I noticed that I hardly dropped any fic at all, either because I was more picky with what I read or I just powered through, and I don’t think that was the case in previous years. There was also a tiny bit of pressure at the beginning to start off the year with the “right” fic. Like, “oh god is my first fic of the year seriously going to be this unfinished 2nd person, woke-up-with-the-wrong-junk CYOA in which Claude and Lorenz investigate fuckplants and discover the true meaning of friendship.” (for the record, it was not my first fic of the year, but I DO recommend it.)

God this is long. One benefit of twitter is that it doesn’t allow me to ramble on like this, but oh well, that’s what you get. I really, really hope the cut tag worked.

#fandom #fic tracking #ao3 wrapped #fandom navelgazing ahoy!#warning that this reallly is like 95% about fire emblem fanfic.

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